#two of our pcs weren't there this week!!

[girlfriendsofthegalaxy]

tuesday again 8/6/2024

people mad at a video game for being woke, i'm mad at it for not being woke enough. so it goes.

also i wrote a yeehawgust fic

listening

another addition to the "SOMEBODY COME FUCK THIS (GAY)" playlist, thank u charli xcx and billie eilish

-

reading

im still really annoyed with Retraction Watch for platforming a terf last year and then not doing any sort of sockpuppet damage control in the comments. since they got acquired by crossref they've done way less guest editorials. not to be all "stick to sports!" but stick to sports, retraction watch.

they did introduce me to this substack series i will be following with great interest about the rise and fall of hindawi. wiley acquired a paper mill a few years back, bc they seemingly did zero diligence, and then blithely ignored the problem for two years before being forced to do the single largest retraction of papers in scientific publishing history, somewhere above ten thousand articles because it is STILL ONGOING.

i do love following various retractions bc i like seeing what finally made someone go "wait a minute", and, as i have just written in a cover letter, "I studied astronomy and have held several data jobs because I’m fascinated with how and why systems work and fail..."

-

watching

my best friend has decided while i'm at her home in the evenings eating her food and bothering her children (for my mental health, it is very important i am fed tiny bits of mushed up banana by hand by her one-year-old), our new project is watching all the xmen movies. i have no particular desire to do this or special affinity for the xmen, and i would like to keep eating very good texmex and bothering her children (for my mental health, it is very important i play hot wheels with the five-year-old). this sounds so super bitchy of me but it's hard to convey that these are essentially on for background noise.

saw the first two. the two things i know about them are that hugh jackman is in them and they're at the statue of liberty in one

-

playing

an ideologically baffling little environmental game free in the epic store this week, LumberJack. this is on PC and Switch for $13, which is far more money than the playtime anyone can get out of this game. tiny tiny tiny little Spain-headquartered studio without an active website, it looks like one guy hired out to make this and two more games and then went back to single-dev projects. i can respect that!

steam reviewers are mad at this game for being woke, and i'm mad at it for being woke in a very strange way. your one mechanic, as a bear, is swinging a big axe to remove cars and trailer offices and portapotties and various garbage from the landscape.

i wish the movement and look controls are inverted, and i wish they weren't, or at least had an option to make them normal. i know Why this isn't a mobile game (can't monetize something with twoish hours of gameplay and twenty levels) but it's a very straightforward and simple game that would translate very well to mobile. much like donut county.

now for being picky about the political mindset of the developers: as much fun as it is to be a bear swinging an axe around, lumberjacks are not the people i associate with wild preservation movements.

saving the land and turning it back into pristine and perfect land for wild animals in this game looks like erasing every hint of human activity from a site and turning it into sheer recreational use. many levels are heavily polluted, but some can definitely be read as recycling centers. im confused by the erasing every hint of humans in early levels, and then this level where you break down a radio station, slap the host with your axe, and she turns into a park ranger who starts gardening and taking care of chickens?

i don't think that removing all the traces of people from the landscape will magically fix everything, nor do i think simply being in unspoiled wilderness will magically fix me.

there's a golfing level where you whack bombs into various small buildings. i think golfing to save the environment is a strange choice to make for designing a game.

i also briefly thought this bird in every level was an extinct ivory-billed woodpecker, which was a little alarming bc there are some real nutjobs out there with very strong beliefs about this bird and government overreach and how much the government is lying to you about the extinctness of various animals.

i stopped playing about halfway through bc i was not having fun and found the underlying environmental message a little confused. they've managed to sell at least 10k units which is...not very good. i am not surprised this is free on epic, and i wonder what their payout for that was. would not be surprised if they negotiated a payment to their nonprofit partner ecologi as part of that.

-

making

yeehawgust fill! i have another bitchy blond babygirl!

what the fuck is the prisoner? cult 60s british spy tv. with all the surreality and anxieties about the cold war and midcentury psychological horror you could possibly want

He’d been drugged enough times to recognize the splitting migraine rapidly galloping down his neurons. “Where am I?” He fought down the taste of bile (ketamine? xylazine, by the aftertaste) and the rising panic. Oddly enough, the migraine was always worse with veterinary sedatives. One would think a mind would adapt to nearly three hundred years of irregular drugging and constant experiments. One’s body had adapted and ghoulified, but in equally unhelpful ways. The tycoon flickered, approximating an appraising blink. “This meeting has been a long time coming, hasn't it? You've come a long ways, literally and, I suspect, figuratively as well. You’re in the Free Economic Zone of New Vegas.” They’d pretended the prisons were so many different places: across the Continent, in various parts of London, up and down and all around the East Coast of these wretched States. Rarely this far west, aside from the awful escapade in the faux pre-War Western town. “What do you want?” He managed to swing his ankles off the saddle (also pre-War? Heavily used. It certainly wasn’t his, the equestrian event had always been his worst event in the pentathalon) and jolted what felt like every half-dead nerve in his half-dead body.

[strobichie]

rin's childhood crush ෆ

♡⸝⸝ summary: rin itoshi, a young 16 year old blue lock participant and a few others were given some weeks off of blue lock. how will the young itoshi spend his free time? to his surprise, he didn't think he'd stumble upon one of his old favourite games dating back to his childhood.

little note: monika can be a self-insert i guess.

underlashes junior's (rin) perspective:

i failed to be acknowledged by my own brother. i worked so hard, but in the end isagi stole his attention. what was it that i lacked..?

my hands messed with sae's old computer back when we were younger --- mom and dad bought him this computer for school, however he and i always played on it when they weren't looking our way.

i was in deep thought, thinking, what the hell was it that made sae look isagi's way?

sae wasn't gonna be home anytime soon, might as well use this to my advantage. i remember a game.. a horror game.. an old one. i couldn't place a finger on what it was about or why our younger selves even downloaded it in the first place, nonetheless, i find myself desperately searching for it.

after starting windows, i immediately clicked the file explorer icon on the taskbar, and was greeted with many old pictures of us in our childhood days. i wanted to smash somebody's head.

my eyes stared at the downloads, i clicked on it and scrolled a few seconds down. was this...

ddlc-win? what the fuck does ddlc stand for?

i extracted the files and opened the ddlc-win folder ---

ddlc-1.1.1-pc?? i eyed it curiously before finally double clicking and checking the contents of the game ---

i started the game up and was met with a.. girl? she looked.. scared?? terrified?? mortified..?!

she had similar features to sae, auburn hair, and not-so similar eyes. hers were emerald green.

all i knew was she had the character features of someone kind.

"..." she was silent, staring into my soul with her eyes wide. was this the game me and sae used to play? really?

to say the least, she was greatly sad. i clicked the 'talk' side bar besides the chat box below and selected 'hey, monika..' and continued, 'appearance...'

'can you tie your hair into something else?' i clicked the box, and she suddenly.. got happy?

'sure rin, which hair tie would you like me to use?' she laid out a side bar with only two choices. one of her without her infamous white bow and one without.

was this a mod? i don't remember doki doki literature club being only about monika.

although this may seem quite out of character for me, i think she's pretty cute. or that she just reminds me of sae.

i removed her white bow and she looked even more like sae, this was a fucking nightmare.

she crossed her arms firmly, frowning at me. what did i do now..?

i clicked talk > i feel.. > bored and read her dialogues ---

yikes.. uh.. the first option box looks really shiny today.

i could feel the inner child in me getting excited, i felt.. happy? this was weird.

'oh, that's a relief! but, if you're bored, we should go find something to do.' i felt my cheeks burn, the memories came back and i remembered my younger self always gushing over her, fanboying.. and all.

monika.. was my childhood crush?

author's very very VERY important note: well folks i guess i'll leave it at that, might make a part two, might not.

[x2goose1473952]

The Electronic Arts: Vision and Sound CCDP 10002 – Assessment 1 - 1473952

I approached this piece by reflecting on the week 2 topic- Perception, Optical Illusions (how the brain works). Every topic brings something new, but this one felt closest to my style and interests as an amateur/hobbyist digital artist. Since I got my first PC, I've been torrenting cracked software and messing around with Photoshop and other multimedia programs. I was always rubbish at freehand drawing, but navigating computer-aided design applications came naturally. Our eyes see objects, environments and anything they can capture in everyday life. We often take what we see with our eyes as the definitive truth for what is actually there. Optical Illusions shatter that "truth". They are an excellent example of our brains manufacturing a reality to better understand our surroundings in life. What we perceive and what is there could be two totally different truths. The discovery of optical illusions to many (and myself for a long time) was merely a fun magic trick to enjoy through YouTube videos or, if you're really old, those ancient magic eye books with hidden pictures. I decided to further explore this concept with the George Redhawk effect (named after the visually impaired artist), initially created after Redhawk started to lose his vision.

Before his artistic career, Redhawk worked in various areas of medicine, teaching subjects on x-ray technology. Before his vision deteriorated, he wanted to internalize everything visually exciting to his memory. He used an image transition software called Magic Morph, but instead of making image1 go to image2 he morphed the image onto itself. The result was an amazingly trippy and fluid-like animation which led to a series of creations. The effect has been used to recreate and describe the perceptions people experience on psychedelics like LSD and magic mushrooms. Maybe the visuals people experience on these substances aren't a distorted reality but an altered one. Even our perspective when dead sober could be viewed as an altered reality. The Redhawk effect offers 1 explanation for a complex discussion. It is one potential of what we could be seeing when something else is happening. Our eyes are unable to process it. That dead tree in the centre of a garden bed surrounded by stone pillars could be more alive than our beating heart. Combining this with a geometrically distorted image mash was something that I wanted to explore. Look at that garden bed or that tree; it blends naturally with the image, but these are photos merged from multiple angles. Glancing at the still image for only a second would tell you nothing. It looks normal. But the closer you look, the higher the frequency of distortions. The static elements in the rest of the animation also give this impression that it very well could be a typical garden, an ordinary front yard, if it wasn't for the blatantly obvious coloured textures replaced from the stone path and the hyper-sharpened front window, everything else is entirely "normal". We are at a period in history that's never been more visually focused than any of the previous. People walk around with ultra-powerful high-definition computers in their pockets. Something that would have been out of a science fiction movie in the 60s is now standard. Yet our observations have grown numb (in a day-to-day setting), and the frequency of face value evaluations is higher than in the 60s. Technology has granted us a gateway to explain the alternate reality better than ever. Still, I feel we have grown more accustomed and content to the face value perception. I'm not saying that we can't do this anymore; it's just that technology has softened our brains to the point where we don't think to do it without being prompted to. I would have continued with the same mindset if it weren't for this project. But now I'm actively trying to question everything. E.g. The notes I've taken in my core units are wrong. The Baroque period did not just immediately end when Bach died. Consumables like junk food and drugs considered "bad" or "unhealthy" could be the polar opposite. Maybe cigarettes feel good and give you cancer because they are a shortcut to ending your existence. The dopamine rush that hits when sipping on a can of coke (and the diabetes that follows) is the dark matter or some other unviewable element or presence in the universe communicating with you, telling you to keep doing it so you can reach the other side faster. The extent to which I believe in these philosophies is low, but that is irrelevant. These "what ifs" are just a way of viewing the tail side of the coin when only the head is held up to your eyes.

[juliepinsononline]

Work in Progress

(Soap Opera Weekly 97)

 

Sitting over lunch in the ABC commissary, Julie Pinson (Eve) very bluntly descripes her first few months' work on PC: "I sucked," she says with a hearty laugh. "Wendy Riche (executive producer) and all the producers and directors had a lot of patience with us and let us find our characters. In the first three weeks, they could very easily have recast. Instead, they gave me the chance to grow into Eve, and I think she's turned into something great."

She credits co-star Kin Shriner (Scott) for her rapid improvement. "He taught me about making the character my own. After we'd wrap up at the end of the day, sometimes we'd talk, and he'd tell me what I was doing wrong or right. He really took me under his wing and taught me a lot about acting," she says.

Pinson says Shriner's feedback helped her to improve her acting.

(click on image to see full sized pic)

Pinson claims that performing is in her blood. "My mother was a professional opera singer. I remember being little and watching her onstage. I was fascinated with the costumes and the makeup, and I wanted to be just like Mom." She got hooked on acting when she played Heidi in her Northern California forth grade class. "I remember all the adulation at the curtain call. My family was the loudest in the whole auditorium. I thought, 'If I do this, I'll get my family and everybody else to like me.'"

Pinson is very close to her parents; in fact, she calls herself a "typical daddy's little girl," which made it even more devastating at age 15 when her folks split up. Instead of confronting her feelings, she suffered the consequences of suppressing them. "I was in denial, and nobody recognized the signs," she explains. "I was going 'I's cool, it's cool,' and in the meantime, it was affecting me in very negative ways. I wanted to seem adult and be cool and understanding with the attitude, 'Listen, Mom and Dad, I want you to be happy, so don't worry about me.' It idnd't hit me until I was 20 or 21 when I started going, 'Dammit, why did they have to do that?'"

In retrospect, Pinson wishes she'd been more vocal about her feelings so that counseling might have been sought. "I'm a big believeer in therapy," she says. "it's helped me through some hard times. In situations like that, parents need to talk to the kids. The kids may say, 'It's cool, don't worry about it.' Unhuh," she says, shaking her head adamantly. "it will hit them eventually."

Shortly after high school, Pinson left the Bay area to work for Club Med. "It was a blast," she says, "I really learned how to be an adult, traveling by myself, not speaking the language in some places and having to fend for myself. I learned to speak a lot of languages, though, because every week there were 5oo new guests, many from Italy, Germany, France and Mexico.

"The biggest drawback was the long hours. It's a French company, so they don't have the labor laws we have in the States. Because you have to be with the guests all the time, you can't be crabby, have a bad day or be sick because there's nobody to cover for you. For the most part I just remember the good things now. After two years of that kind of schedule, I was ready to have three jobs when I moved to L.A. I was so programmed to work."

Pinson took an apartment in L.A. with her best friend, but her fear of rejection and her aversion to asking her parents for money kept her from pursuing her acting dreams. Instead, she worked for a temp agency and as a movie stand-in for a friend who was director of photograhpy. Her one line in The Mambo Kings got cut but earner her a Screen Actors Guild card, enabling her to work in the field. But she still struggled with her fears.

"Things weren't going too well," shares Pinson. "I called my dad in tears and said, 'I think I'm goingto give it up. I'm goin to get a job being a receptionist or go back to school. It's hard to live from paycheck to paycheck.' He said, 'You have always landed on your feet. You always will land on your feet. Don't give up. You will make it no matter what because that's who you are.'"

Pinson, who auditioned for three PC characters, related best to Eve.

(click on image to see full sized pic)

The actress consders her big break her screen test for the role of Billie on DAYS. Despite the resemblance to Lisa Rinna (ex-Billie), she didn't get the role. But it brought her some attention, and soon she auditioned for the part of Pilar on ATWT. After auditioning for PC, it seemed she was bound to get something, since they had her read for three roles: Eve, Julie and Karen. She was elated when she landed the part of Eve, her first real acting job. "Eve was the closest to me. I really understood her the best," Pinson says. "I love playing her because I get to be bad. I get to be sexy and I get to do things I wouldn't do in real life."

Not that Pinson doesn't have a bit of moxie of her own. "I want to jump out of an airplane, preferably with a parachute on," she teases. "And I want to get a Harley and learn to ride a motorcycle." She would also like very much to have a family some day, but everything is goin to have to wait while she focuses on her career. "I think God has a plan for me, and there's a reason why I've never had a serious relationship," she says. "I think if I'd had a serious relationship earlier on, I might not be where I am right now. There's a reason for everything."

Robyn Flans

[linuxgamenews]

Discover Anima Flux's Year: The 2023 Recap

Anima Flux co-op metroidvania game for Linux, Mac, and Windows PC offers a recap of 2023. Thanks to the developer, also named Anima Flux. Due to make its way onto Steam and GOG later in 2024. As we welcome this new year, it's a great moment to stop and think about the things that happened. It's been quite year with lots of big wins and growth. Anima Flux is thankful for everything they've achieved, and stoked about what's coming next. Your solid support has been key in making things happen with the title. Now that 2024 is here, let's check out some of the best bits from this past year.

Demo for the Community in May

Back in the spring, we gave our Discord community a sneak peek of Anima Flux. This was a chance for players to see what we've been working on. Along with helful player thoughts and tips – letting the developer tweak and make things even better. Having already put a lot of your great ideas into action.

Anima Flux Co-op Metroidvania Trailer

Highlights from Steam Next Fest

October was a big month with Steam Next Fest. For this event, this meant launching a public demo on Steam, still letting Linux players from all over the world dive into the game. While offering live streams all week, talking about the story of Anima Flux and having great chats with players.

Experiences from Other Events

Throughout the year, Anima Flux also took part in events like DevPlay.RO and Nordic Game in Helsinki. These weren't just chances to show off the title; they were also times to meet the players and get more feedback. Anima Flux is all about teamwork and exploration. You play as two super-soldier agents in a tough, theocratic dictatorship. Your mission? Battle through hordes of mutants in a ruined, dystopian space city to save humanity's last safe place. If anyone's still there, that is. As we step into the new year, player feedback keeps inspiring and pushing the dev's forward. Due to share more plans and bring the dream to life. Stay tuned – there's a lot of unique stuff on the horizon!. You can Wishlist the co-op metroidvania on Steam and GOG.

[thesinglesjukebox]

100 GECS - "HOLLYWOOD BABY"

We kick off week two of our reanimation with CONTROVERSY MONDAY. Time to find out once and for all how predictable we are!

[6.05]

Aaron Bergstrom: On March 4, 2023, in a cold, TSJ-less world, I wrote a few track reviews for my sorely neglected blog, including this one for "Hollywood Baby": "By far the dumbest song on this list, and yet it leaves me with a huge grin on my face every time I hear it. I can say with 100% certainty that (a) The Singles Jukebox would have reviewed this, (b) I would have given it a [9], (c) the next highest score would have been a [4] at best, and (d) multiple very smart people would have given it a [0]. I don't care. It's great." I have never been more confident in a prediction, and eight months later this song still makes me want to get drunk and light off fireworks indoors. [9]

Wayne Weizhen Zhang: Sometimes it can feel exhausting to enjoy 100 gecs because their music feels shrouded behind 100 (10,000?) layers of irony. "Hollywood Baby," however, is big, loud, and stupid enough that it avoids this problem entirely. [7]

Vikram Joseph: Early 2000s punk-pop succeeded on two distinct levels -- songs that were radically dumb or deeply, unabashedly sincere. (Certain Blink-182 songs managed both, and that's why they're giants of the genre, for whatever that's worth now as they lurch around the globe like a three-legged nightmare of Christmas past.) "Hollywood Baby" feels like a misguided science experiment -- what if we precision-designed a Sum 41 riff and threw some PC Music vocals over it? Wouldn't that be post-modern? There's no heart, too much brain, and ultimately it's just quite grotesque. [3]

Will Rivitz: Even when they sound like Sum 41 they do! not! miss! Absolutely improbable banger and change to spare. [9]

Daniel Montesinos-Donaghy: Every major label on Earth should pause their direct debit to Travis Barker until he starts svengali-ing pop-punk facsimiles as good as this. [8]

Taylor Alatorre: It makes total sense to seek refuge in the relative simplicity and guilelessness of pop punk songwriting; I do it all the time. It makes less sense to view that style as an emblem of a mythical bygone purity that disappeared sometime between Tha Carter III and the 2010 midterms shellacking. I mean, the guys who made "Fat Lip" weren't some three-chord noble savages -- those Canadians really could shred. And maybe it's part of the joke that the gecs enlist actual superhuman Josh Freese to lay down a beat that wouldn't even be a tier 1 drum track on Rock Band, but that's too many layers of abstraction for music that constantly insists upon how dumb it is. Point is, both virtuosity and amateurism were key elements of major-label punk in the 2000s, and a pastiche that focuses exclusively on the latter runs the risk of devolving into vaudeville, or what's worse, novelty music. The high points of "Hollywood Baby" are the parts that enliven the caricature by taking influence, perhaps unconsciously, from the artists that Brady and Les might have listened to in high school rather than middle school -- Uffie, Santogold, M.I.A., and yes (*sigh*)... Sleigh Bells. The hectic four-on-the-floor lead-in to the chorus arrives as a welcome disruption to all the shiftless lo-fi riffage, and it serves as an example of the kind of effortless cathartic release that was easier to find on 100 gecs' debut than on the sequel. [5]

Katherine St Asaph: This sounds almost normal, and I can't tell whether that's because 100 gecs have ~*~*~*sold out*~*~*~ or because the Internet now offers a million more post-hyperpop rabbitholes that lead to places a million times weirder and horrifying. It sounds like finding a decaying issue of YM in your childhood bedroom, then shopping the slimy, waterlogged pop-punk spread online with your own adult money. [7]

Frank Falisi: The falsest artistic binary is the one between accessible and avant, between pop and experimental. These are tendencies, for sure, useful for composing in or avoiding altogether to suit an aesthetic process. But ultimately, the notion that something is either churnable or difficult comes down to the (blessedly) complicated relationship a listener builds with a sound, rather than the (equally complicated) one between it and its composer. Selling out is a whole other thing--we're talking about strategies of distance and intimacy, staying sharp only so long as it lets us connect, gloriously spilling over into each other. Isn't part of the earnestness of 1000 gecs in its experimentation? When we talk about charting the changes--in the body, in the same song--aren't we exploring how "pop" and "experimental" settle in the same physical moment? Those wiggles can hug! And now, a descent into pastiche, into caking and eating it archly. What I mean is: what is this Japandroids shit? Are you being clever? How's clever going for you? [2]

Brad Shoup: One of the more straight-ahead tracks on 10,000 gecs, which for our heroes still means "pop-punk but mixed like a crime". The riff is sick; the gecs rock back and forth like a prizefighter sizing up the opponent. It's catharsis all the way through, even on a chorus that reads like machine-learning crunkcore. [7]

Michelle Myers: It seems the conventional wisdom is that "Hollywood Baby" sounds like blink-182, but I actually lived through 2000s pop-punk the first time, and this is way more Good Charlotte. [7]

Leah Isobel: This sounds like Yellowcard. [7]

Anna Katrina Lockwood: This sounds like a slightly more legible update on Times New Viking, so of course I love it. [8]

Alfred Soto: Fuzzy fun -- Sleigh Bells meets Paramore. Attitude compensates for middling hook. [6]

Ian Mathers: For some reason I didn't like the "Ringtone" remix back in the day (maybe I just hadn't been burped), but everything I've heard since has been great. And look, anyone in 2023 who's going to make a record that contains both this and "Frog on the Floor" (to say nothing of sequencing them in a row) is clearly on the side of the angels. [8]

Nortey Dowuona: juiceworld2 once said this band sounded like white privilege. They were right. During the first hype cycle for Dylan Brady and Laura Les, they were scooping up incredibly corny, laughable music and serving it with a heavy dose of irony that made it only mildly entertaining. There would be actual innovation done with the form, novel uses of long overused effects and the destruction of conventional structure. But now they're making bland pop-rock that Olivia Rodrigo could write a rough draft of in a week or an hour. And we hyped them to the moon as these inventive, creative artists who deserved the serious recognition we gave them -- why? [5]

Joshua Minsoo Kim: For a while there, 100 gecs had me feeling like Adorno with Schoenberg. At last, here was a contemporary artist who represented total freedom, though in this case it was from the tyranny of taste and genre. More importantly, they interrogated the ways in which sounds are readily situated in a particular social milieu. They didn't need a gimmick to blend different styles, as 2000s emo bands did with their Punk Goes Pop and Punk Goes Crunk albums. They also didn't care for musical styles to feel like discrete parts of a song, as acts like Falling in Reverse and BABYMETAL did before them. On "Stupid Horse," they threw in melodies from blink-182's "Roller Coaster" alongside cartoonish ska skanks, wimpy gang vocals, and unabashedly excited guitar shredding. This was maximalist joy wrought from patchwork. 10,000 gecs isn't quite the same. It's less a surrealist, sublime hodgepodge than the band throwing a simple twist on individual ideas. "Hollywood Baby" is the nadir of this newfound modesty. I hear 2000s pop punk once again, but only the drums provide a real differentiation between past and present. A song like the Mark Hoppus-featuring "I'd Do Anything" had snares that sounded like skateboards hitting pavement; "Hollywood Baby" goes for blown-out bombast. Even the lyrics are more straightforward! I get no joy from these simple pleasures. Again, I feel like Adorno: this is what he'd call "stubborn rationalization." [0]

Jonathan Bradley: "Hollywood Baby" has a thick fat-fingered guitar riff and flailing power chords and might as well be constructed from oversized cargo shorts and a chain wallet. I was so struck by 1000 gecs back in 2019 because it seemed to absorb the seething hatreds of the time and the disruption of a world on fire and respond with their own form of chaos: if the world refused to make sense, their music was its own kind of senseless excess. This is less warped zeitgeist and more of a good time. But you can pogo to a good time. [8]

Tim de Reuse: It's well-executed, the soft -> loud transition within the first verse is very energetic, and it's probably cathartic to chant along with at a concert. Good clean fun. Hey, do you remember 2019? Remember when you heard "Money Machine" for the first time and it seemed ridiculous that it could get as big as it was getting, even if you didn't like it all that much? Remember when the term "hyperpop" had a kind of unbounded promise to it -- not even because you liked it, but because it felt like it had some kind of velocity behind it? This Lil Nas X guy came out of nowhere entirely off this new TikTok thing -- totally new methods of hitmaking! Things could get more abrasive -- more weird -- things might finally start to shift around, and we could all look back and tell Mark Fisher that he was wrong, and the early 21st century was just a kind of inexplicable plateau we had to push through so that popular Western music could finally lurch into the future, and I'm sure if he'd been around he would have been glad to hear it. And then 2020 happened, and then we lost SOPHIE, we got "ABCDEFU," and Taylor made a gesture in the direction of an album and got the top ten spots of the Billboard charts simultaneously. Yeah, I'm making up a narrative here -- it's not fair of me to project my hopes and dreams onto the gecs and their own creative ambitions. It's not fair of me to say "It's perfectly serviceable, but if I were in their situation I would have done something that would have saved the world." But, like, imagine -- stay with me -- imagine if the verses on this had been deep-fried ska instead of distorted middle-school power pop mush. I'm not saying that would have been good music. But, like. World fucking peace, man. [5]

Jacob Sujin Kuppermann: I really loved 1000 gecs! [3]

Tara Hillegeist: In the years between the release of the seminal California pop-punk albums Enema of the State and The Young and the Hopeless, both of which find parts of themselves "quoted" on "Hollywood Baby" and the 100 gecs album to which it belongs, two notable things had happened to a young Tara: my house got "the internet" and I made my first friends who both lived outside my neighborhood and who I could write to and expect an immediate response from; and two people I cared about dearly died, one shortly after the other: my great-uncle, and one of said "internet friends." I guess I'm supposed to wish I could say I wept harder for my uncle -- but he was survived by the rest of my family, in whose arms I found his memory impossible to escape, even should I have wanted to. Meanwhile, I spent three months painstakingly tracing my friend's initials on the back of my hand in black Sharpie, the only proof I could manifest in my life that she ever existed, that her presence mattered to anyone I knew at all. There was a poetic irony, at least to a morbid preteen, that her username's initials, "DNR," also spelled out the universal medical shorthand for "Do Not Resuscitate". There's a different sort of irony to that as I write this now, on the other side of COVID and still living with the side effects, more dead friends than I have fingers later. To be a trans woman in her mid-30s now feels a little bit like getting all the downsides of the rockstar biopic montage and none of the talking-head dividends -- drugs to keep you alive, drugs to drown in, a bunch of assholes ready to call you washed and wasted at the first sign of failing, and if you haven't started rotting away in some obscure hotel room where nobody who loves you knows how to find you then you're looking over your shoulder waiting for the gossip-rag sword of Damocles to fall instead. A glamorous life is a whole fantasy away -- if only it were as easy as it looked, then, to mess up my way to success. To have fun like it was real anyway is no small thing. [7]

[Read, comment and vote on The Singles Jukebox ]

[grapejuicegay]

I’m starting to think maybe we’re not very good at dnd... things that happened today:

Wasted two whole sessions on a shopping trip (because we get sidetracked and there are 10+ of us including npcs), spent another hour today going to buy drugs for our party + 2 recurring guest pcs

Finally got our new ship and headed off on our new quest - the day before we get there, the two warlocks prank my cleric into doing the drugs. my cleric fails the con save and spends the first day in this new place with 1 level of exhaustion

Our new wizard actively and openly hates my cleric, mostly because our gods hate each other

We shipwreck and completely our new vorpal vessel on this desolate island where we’re cut off from communication through a series of terrible rolls that leads to our wizard destroying the vorpal crystal

two of our players are missing, in game we don’t know where they went when our ship crashed

We’re on this island searching for a dangerous criminal who does blood magic experiments and may have created demiplane hopping vampires

We encounter a construct powered by unstable magic that manipulates time around us to stop us from even being able to move a lot

We left our life cleric npc with the ship to help with the repairs + search for the missing pcs

We end up with 6 people down and our bard permanently dead

While my grave cleric scrambles to get people back up, the unstable magic core of the construct explodes, permanently killing our warlock of phulgobin

this is the 3rd time our warlock is dying. the last 2 times phulgobin brought him back. out of character, we assumed it would happen again

nope. phulgobin takes the wheel.

My cleric tries to revivify the bard while the others try to get phulgobin away.

This is the first time I’ve had to use revivify. Our DM ritual casts it. I went in with the assumption it’s touch.

Guest pc cleric dies

warlock is dead and has been taken over by his patron who is trying to absorb and assimilate everything. this is not yet his final form

i go down trying to revivify our bard

one of our barbarians saves me, but we have to go down a path deeper into the structure we were in, while everyone else escaped the other side to the outside 

our sorcerer tries to fireball the phulgobin entity

burns guest pc cleric to a crisp

he had accidentally fallen into an abyssal portal a while back and accidentally made a deal with orcus. we don’t know what happened to his soul

our bard is dead. our butler - who we had also made a deal with all the way back in phandalin - comes and collects our bard’s soul. we do not know this because we never bothered to check what he wanted in return for being “one hell of a butler”

our warlock is dead. his soul has now been split in half between phulgobin and our butler

we have now released phulgobin on the world

my cleric fails two saves and our barbarian brings her back by activating a curse she was given a few sessions back - the stigmata of suffering - that lets her take on other people’s injuries. we don’t know the full extent of this yet.

my cleric (at 1 hp) and our barbarian are now stuck inside this structure built into a mountain where we are pretty sure further ahead are more encounters and on the other side is potentially phulgobin.

because we have such a big party, we usually leave most of our npcs behind, taking only one or two with us. we have to at some point make our way back to them and tell them who all died. the ncps we’d have to tell:

the other warlock, sort of a father figure, and was very close to him

12 year old tiefling who is actually the secret daughter of an abyssal lord that we are supposed to be protecting her from. dangerously strong, has anger issues the warlock was trying to figure out how to help her control. she thinks you make friends by fighting them, her and the warlock used to fight more regularly. incredibly attached

lawful good cleric

fighter who has trauma about being the sole survivor of shipwrecks before

at least we leveled up

[prodbyblush]

fairy tale - arisu ryohei, chishiya shuntaro and niragi suguru

ｎｏｗ ｌｏａｄｉｎｇ . . .

▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒ 100%

ᴄᴏᴍᴘʟᴇᴛᴇ!

・❥・ requested

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7

Word Count: 700

Tags: twitchstreamer!arisu, medtechstudent!chishiya, entertainmentandmultimediastudent!niragi, balletstudent!femreader and physicsstudent!femreader

Taglist: @ahahawowwwwww @chishiyaslosthoodie @jnrenner @dorizone @bangtannie7 @fruity-frutta @miniminnie27 @itsmeaudrieee @andreeasancheez @cherriruto @penispostcards

→ fem!reader

Though he isn't vocal about it, Arisu felt like his skin was becoming dry and dull. Even Karube and Chota pointed it out one night while they were drinking at the pub where Karube works. And even though he streams every night, playing a game through with his viewers, some of his viewers left comments how they could visibly see his skin condition through their screens.

And Y/N heard all about his conversation with his viewers that night, heard how one of her roommates was clueless about skincare and didn't know how to deal with it except for soap and water. Y/N internally felt like punching a wall when she heard how he would deal with his skin.

The following day as Y/N sits in her last class, her mind was already flying away, half not caring about what her professor was discussing between the difference of geochemistry, geodynamics and geomagnetism. But as the clock strikes 6:00 pm, her last class has come to an end.

"Before all of you could go, I want a two page paper about the seven branches of physics. To be passed on our next meeting!" Y/N sighed and left the classroom, slinging her shoulder bag on her shoulder, she knew she had to start on that homework, because next meeting meant the day after tomorrow.

Instead of her usual route going to the train station, Y/N made a stop at the mall, heading towards the beauty bar store which wasn't packed with people since it's a week day. Taking a small cart, she made her way to look at the different brands and products that could help a guy's skin brighten, smoothen and moisturize.

"Do you need any assitance?"

Y/N lifted her head up and found a saleslady smiling down at her, she shook her head before placing a cleanser bottle inside her cart. "No need, I have everything in my control" Y/N smiles, standing back up on her feet.

The saleslady eyed the items in her cart - a cleanser, serum and moisturizer and several aloe vera and lemon face masks.

"Are those for a friend?" The saleslady inquired

Y/N chuckled softly, her eyes eyeing the face mists on the racks. "Not exactly a friend"

"Then perhaps, your boyfriend?"

Y/N almost choked on her saliva as she heard the word 'boyfriend'. The saleslady immediately patting her back while Y/N coughed it out. "I'm alright!" She says, breathing it out, "he isn't my boyfriend too, just my roommate"

In the end, Y/N bought everything inside her cart and went home, taking the train and buying a to go sushi for dinner. Upon arriving at the apartment, she quietly stepped inside to see if anyone from the three were home, but it was her all alone again. Letting out a sigh of relief, she placed the paper bag containing the many skincare items on top of his table, in front of his gaming pc. Removing the receipt, Y/N took out a pink post it paper and taped her note on the handle before retreating inside her room, hiding their for the rest of the night.

.   .   .   .   .   .   .   .   .   . ♡

Arisu came running home early tonight, though he wanted to drink with his friends, Karube's pub was packed and Chota needed to submit a deadline with his supervisor due to tomorrow because it was already three days overdue.

Upon arriving home, he found that Chishiya and Niragi weren't back yet, but the sight of the pink bunny slippers usually placed besides his were already gone, meaning their other roommate is inside.

Putting on his slippers, he made his way to his table when he noticed a brown paper bag laying on top. He didn't if it was his, but since it was placed on top of his table, then it surely meant it was his.

" I bought these for you because I heard you needed it! ଘ(˵╹-╹)━☆ "

A soft smile painted his lips, even though he hasn't formally met their fourth roommate, he felt thankful for her. He turned to take a peak in their hallway, and he found the pink bunny slippers by the last door.

[serenityseventeen]

Love & Letter: To The Thirteen Boys I've Loved Before

The Fourth Letter

-----------------

To: Wen Junhui

From: Y/N

Jun, how are you doing lately?

I'm always wondering that now that you're gone. I want to text you or call you but it'll be awkward since before you left, we decided to break up. I want to call and hear your voice, laugh at your jokes, I miss it all.

I'm sure it's better for the both of us that we cut off contact, but how can I forget you, my first boyfriend that I'm still in love with? I think you're the first person I've ever loved so deeply like this. I know that I'm in love with you.

During the little over half a year that we dated, I learned so many things about love. It was phenomenal, beautiful, and such a good feeling.

I'm always wondering, if we weren't teens in high school, if we were adults, would our relationship be different? Would we have ended differently? Because if we were adults, maybe you wouldn't have to leave back to China. Even now, I'm wondering, in the future, can we cross paths again? Give our love another chance?

But I know that by that time, we would be completely different people and maybe not even attracted to each other anymore. Who knows, you may find someone in China that you love better than me.

If you didn't have to go, maybe we could have had a longer relationship. Why must we have to be apart when we're so in love? You're my first boyfriend ever and I can't be more grateful to you. You were the best first boyfriend I could ever ask for.

This letter to you, it's not a confession, only a little bit. I just want to write this letter to remember you, my first boyfriend, and thank you now that it would be too awkward to do it over text or call.

You're my first boyfriend and when you came into my life, it felt like someone above heard my prayers. At that time when you slipped into my life, I'll confess that I was trying to fall out of love with someone else. Thanks to you, I was able to do that.

Should we both thank Mr. Koo for pairing us up for the 2-month project? I mean, thanks to him, I was able to fall in love with someone like you.

I remember how awkward it was for both of us introverts to speak with each other. You introduced yourself and I introduced myself and then we didn't talk for like five minutes. I still remember how heavily my heart pounded while waiting for you to speak. To this day, I don't know why you giggled first, but it was attractive and cute. Maybe I'm just so madly in love with you that I find your everything to be perfect and cute.

When we began talking to each other, I was surprised at how unique you were. Trust me, Junhui, you're nothing like anyone I've met before. Out of the guys I've ever met, you're the weirdest! But that's a good thing, because of that charm, I fell even harder for you. It's your charm, Jun.

It was just your way of thinking that was unique. You were able to come up with the most unique jokes I've ever heard and your humor always cracked me up as well. I still remember that first day when we were working on the project, you drew a small sun with a smiley face at the corner of my paper. It was so cute.

Soon, I realized that most of the time during class, we were just busy joking with each other and wasting time. You shared stories about your little brother and always made me laugh somehow. Each time I laughed because of you, my heart fluttered. Each time you laughed because of me, I would feel a rush of excitement and my heart would be pounding so fast.

When you started coming over to my house to work in hopes of getting more progress, that's when our relationship progressed. It was weird to have you around at my house because we just talked so much instead of getting work done. Sometimes, the responsibility would hit me and I would remind us to get to work, in which you would chuckle and reply, “Oh right, what are we doing, fooling around?”

Every time you said something along those lines, it made me smile because you were just so cute. I was slowly drowning myself into your charms. This unique personality of yours was drawing me in.

Aside from your dorkiness, when you get to work, you work hard. Sometimes I was distracted by how you looked when you were focused.

Thank you for asking me out that day at the bus stop. I was sending you home. I know I told you it was because I felt bad for leaving you alone and it really was because I felt bad, but it was also because I wanted to be around you longer.

When we reached the empty bus stop and you waited for the bus, you told me after some hesitation, abruptly, while chuckling softly, “I like you, Y/N. Should we date?”

At that time, my heart and mind were racing, that's why I replied stupidly to your confession and said “Isn't it too fast...?”

Gosh, I was so dumb! It wasn't fast at all and the pace was actually good. We took two weeks getting to know each other, it was about time that you asked me out, right? I mean, I liked you back then too, so I hope you don't think those dates we went on captured my heart because that's not the case at all! I've liked you before your confession.

However, thanks to my dumb reply, you took me on many dates. It was my first time going on dates like that with just one other person. A date like the ones in the movies.

The first date being at the carnival that was open in town. I had so much fun there! Plus, I still have that photo of us with the face paint in my photo gallery. I don't want to delete it because it holds so many memories. Maybe someday, I'll print our couple pictures and tape them on the back of this letter. Plus, the cat ears looked so cute on us.

For the first time, I felt like I was on a real date, and it was with you. I'm grateful that I was able to participate in so many different games with you. I still have the small duck you won for me. Those games are all a total scam but you still insisted and managed to win it for me. At that moment, I felt your sincerity at the bottom of my heart.

I also remember our date at the PC cafe. Gosh, you have the weirdest taste in games, you know that!? Usually, men like playing shooter games but you and I trained a cat to fly and had multiple races. The loser would then have to get a flick on the forehead, even though we both went easy on each other. That brought me a lot of joy too even though it was simple.

For our last date, before we started dating, I just want to confess, I lied about being able to stay out late. My dad didn't figure out I was with you though. I just really wanted to see the movie so I went to watch it with you. That was the location of our first kiss together.

After the movie, I was stretching my back outside the movie theatre. I don't know what you were looking at but if you were looking at me, I'm sorry I looked so ugly while stretching. It was almost 9 PM, two hours past the time I can stay out.

I can remember the scene clearly. I was just about to tie my hair while talking about the movie when you suddenly took my face with your cold hands and kissed me with your warm lips. Your hand on my warm neck was sending chills down my spine. I still didn't know how to kiss then and just going with the flow, I found myself enjoying kissing you a lot. My heart was racing and I remember how hard I clenched onto your khaki jacket. I'm giggling now thinking about it.

I did learn how to kiss better because of you though, Jun. After we started dating, sometimes when my dad left to get us some fruit, you would sneak some kisses onto my lips in the meanwhile instead of working. You're so playful too. Playful and sweet.

Sometimes, you don't know how much you mean to me, Jun. I mean, I'm still a bit upset that you didn't tell me you were moving back to China in the middle of summer break. However, I'm glad that you told me before you moved and just didn't disappear suddenly. Because you told me, I could love you with all of my teenage heart and give you all of me. I was able to convince my father to allow me to spend more hours with you, whether it was goofing around, working hard, or just kissing and hugging. Thank you for that, because I was able to prepare myself. I loved it whenever we were just sitting, our legs crisscrossed, and my arms around your neck with your hands clasped around my waist while we kissed sweetly.

I also love your hair, Jun. It was so soft and flowy that I could ruffle it all day. Your hand too, whenever they clasped with mine, I would always feel a sense of warmth.

When the move ticked closer, I was beginning to grow more nervous. I didn't want you to leave but I knew it wasn't your choice. Did you dread the day as well?

I wonder if we could have broken that long-distance relationship curse. We loved each other after all. I thought that I would be able to handle it as long as I could still hear your voice and text you. I thought long and hard about it, wondering if a breakup was necessary. But then, without even trying, I know that we will eventually drift apart. We're still teens and it's my first time having a boyfriend, how was I supposed to know what to do?

I remember the day before you left, you told me that you loved me and that you were sorry that all you could give me was memories. I'm still believing that every word you said was genuine.

You cared for me when I was sick. I remember how you rushed to check up on me after school when you heard that I was absent because I was sick. Most of the time I was sleeping but I can still remember how gently you caressed my hair and stroked my cheeks.

You showed me unconditional love, even when I was telling you that I wasn't proud of myself. You cheered me on with your bright personality.

I'm glad I said those words too. “I love you.”

Even though we may just seem like kids to others, I truly loved you, Junhui. The day when we broke up at the airport, I did not want you to see me cry. You always told me to cry if I wanted to but I didn't want you to see me cry.

When you said “Well, I guess that's it for us. Thank you, Y/N, for being mine for a while. I love you a lot and I'll always treasure the memories we made” as you left, waving and smiling painfully, I was going to cry, but I just smiled and waved after telling you that I loved you too and that this breakup was unfortunate.

When you stopped your suitcase and ran back to me one more time to hug me, I was about to burst into tears. You said your final goodbye and then went back to your suitcase. To be honest, I wanted to hold you longer. I didn't want you to leave, I wanted to hold you back so that you could stay with me.

After you left, I ran into my dad's car and cried.

I cried a lot and my dad didn't even do anything to stop me. He knew you were my first boyfriend and having to end my relationship with you so sadly made his heart ache too I bet. I'm glad my dad let me cry though. I think he understood what I was going through.

I miss you a lot, Jun. I still think about you a lot. Sometimes I look back on the place where we worked on our project and I can almost see the scenes of us sitting there, laughing, talking, hugging, cuddling, kissing. I was really sad after you left. I'm still getting over it. I'm still remembering when I wake up some days and realize that you're not here with me anymore and that you're in a different time zone, a different country, a different place.

A month has passed since you left. I have a month of summer left to spend to move on.

I hope you're having a good time, staying healthy, being happy where you belong. I will always remember you. I don't want to forget you, Junhui. You mean a lot to me.

I miss you, Jun. I'm thankful to you too.

I love you, Jun.

If only we fell in love at a different time, perhaps in the future when we are adults, capable of our emotions, capable of thinking, capable of our own lives, capable of loving. If you didn't have to move... If you didn't have to leave... I'm sure I'd still have you beside me. Yet, I can't even tell what the present holds, who am I to assume the future?

All I can do is reminisce now. I really miss you, Jun. I'll move on soon enough. Are you trying to move on too? Do you miss me as much as I miss you?

If only we were given more time.

Yours truly,

Y/N

-----------------

© serenityseventeen

6/20/21 - 1:03 am

a/n: I listened to ‘Silent Boarding Gate’ while making this one because that song is so beautiful and just makes me feel like I'm reminiscing about a past love that is now gone. I almost cry every time. It's such a beautiful song, guys...

[paintedwarpony]

Had a chat with my buddy @avinryd this morning...

Long story short and without launching into absolutely flying off the handle with everything that I'm angry about the DM of my group completely bailed on us...

NO YOU KNOW WHAT THE GUY SUCKED. He led us a into the game blind, punished us for being awkward and not knowing each other without having a session zero, consistently misgendered my character and another player AND his character, was really ridiculously sexist and misogynistic, he ignored all of the players attempts to really engage and be involved in building the world of our characters, would get bored if we weren't fighting stuff (like BORED as in would actually pull out his guitar and just play random stupid chords while we were trying to play), got mad when we killed stuff to quickly, interrupted and constantly made side comments while we tried to RP including one time actually stopping my character and asking 'are you really having this conversation?', tried to force us to do stuff we didn't want to do, wouldn't pay us for jobs we did, fucked over multiple characters with really weird ass story choices that essentially stole our paladin's chance to take his oath and made our barbarian the daughter of a random god, consistently dead ended actions we tried to take, cheated us out of XP then whined about us not being higher levels and 100% gave us ALL the vibe that he wasn't really happy or comfortable with how diverse and LGBTQIA+ our group was shaping up to be.

So two weeks ago we started an hour late, he pretty much ignored us for most of the session and then just left after an hour of us playing. Then this week the day before we were supposed to play he was like "until further notice I can't DM and it could be a long time before I could pick this back up".

The party decided to go ahead and meet for our normal time and talk about what to do. We aired some grievances, actually had the chance to really talk to each other and in the mix of it all my genius self offered up the position of DM if they were willing to do a Wildemount campaign because thats the only world I feel I can really confidently DM in.

To my honest surprise they bit.

A few weeks earlier one of my very good friends and favorite d&d artists @alikandhoney asked me to DM his group of buddies. I'm offering their group the chance to choose their setting, one of them is also Wildemount that they can choose.

Its so scary and exciting. And after what I've been through I want to be the DM that I would want to play with and I have been trying hard to build a great and unique storyline for each campaign and build up to each of PCs individual goals and the stories they want to accomplish. And its so insane to me that that old DM blew off my group so much because every single one of them has been so creative and excited and building some of the coolest ideas and even jumping on stuff that I wanted to do myself in our old campaign and was ignored and brushed off. And in my other group they're all seasoned that their ideas and characters are so unique that its making me really strive to come up with some really amazing stuff (I hope) that will be above and beyond for them so its stuff they've never seen before.

Honestly the hardest part is I don't get to gush about my ideas to any of my friends in either group CAUSE SPOILERS.

But bless @avinryd that they're in the same boat as a brand new Wildemount DM and we get to talk to each other and share ideas and get excited together.

Cause honestly you gotta have a buddy that understands to talk to cause you'll go crazy otherwise.

Cause Bro... BRO... B R O... I really seriously am excited about the stuff that I've been making and I really hope they go over well...

Matt Mercer Pray For Me, Lend Me Your Strength...

[willddheartt]

26 Days | Wilbur Soot

30 days to fall in love with someone? Sounds easy right? It would be if that person wasn’t so unbelievably annoying in almost every sense.

You’re not sure how you found yourself in this situation, but you were positive there was no backing out now…

Series Warnings: Mostly fluff and angst, and a very poorly constructed enemies to lovers plot.

Word Count: 2264

Masterlist Series Masterlist

26 Days

God, you hated him so much! You wanted to scream it from the top of a building how much you truly hated Wilbur. But you couldn’t

Lately, no matter what you did or said on stream, he always had a problem with it. You had been streaming Minecraft together, on the SMP. You were just messing around, no lore this time. You suggested you made a house together in L’manburg, no matter what you did, the two of you couldn't agree on a material, you wanted to build it out of birch wood and cobblestone but he insisted on dark oak logs and spruce planks would look better together. You gave up and let him have what he wanted because he was so persistent and you knew had it gone on you would have blown up on him in front of all your viewers, and that’s the last thing you needed right now. 

You were up late, last night, planning out when you were going to meet up, and just a few hours ago the two of you got along perfectly. Laughing over the phone as you were laying in bed, chatting mindlessly. You wondered what happened between then and now.  You and Will planned to meet up in the middle of next week, you were going to drive down to see him and stay at his place. Although you brought up getting a hotel room, Wilbur insisted you stay with him, too tired to resist you agreed, but now you're starting to think maybe getting a hotel room might be for the best. 

You and Wilbur ended your streams at the same time, and you sighed as soon as you were sure it was off. 

“What?” Wil asked, still in the voice chat.  “What was that back there? Why the hell are you so disagreeable?” You let out.  Will scoffed, “Me? You’re the one who kept on insisting birch and cobble when that wouldn't even fit in L’manburg!”  “Jesus Christ,” You sighed, leaning back in your chair and running your hands down your face. “How in the hell are we going to get through this month?”  “Maybe you should stop being so uptight and argumentative.” Wil shot  “Fuck you,” You mumbled before clicking out of the chat and leaving your PC. 

You needed to get out of the house and away from any form of contact you had with Wilbur and social media. You had been cooped up inside your apartment for close to a week at this point, maybe some fresh air would do you good.  You grabbed a jacket and keys before leaving the apartment, leaving your phone charging on your desk. You didn’t want to bring it with you because you didn't even want to think about getting a text or any kind of notification from Wilbur right now, you knew you would have blown up at him completely. 

The weather was just beginning to turn nice, the air was warm but the wind still had a slight winter chill to it, although all the snow was long gone Jack Frost still made his lurking presence known.  Buildings lined the walls of a small square common area where teens mostly hung out after school and on weekends. The square had a fountain in the middle of it, the water had been shut off for the winter but with the warm temperatures from the last month, it had recently been turned back on.  You sat on the ledge of the brick wall around the bottom pool for the fountain, looking at everyone passing through on this nice Wednesday evening. Older couples out for an evening walk, middle-aged business people speed walking their way home from the office, teens scattering the open area, sitting on blankets and laughing in their small groups of friends. You found watching people be interesting, it made you think. 

We are all living our own lives at the same time and most of us on this small planet don't even know of one another, or if you know of them you don't know them, you only know their name. It's weird how that works.  It's astounding to think about though, what are the chances of meeting exactly who you did, at the time you did, and what a gamble it is for them to stick around. 

You had been sitting on the fountain for close to five minutes and when the wind had just started to pick up, sending a slight shiver down your spine.  Your mind was clearer now and you were no longer angry with Wilbur, it was stupid what you fought about and as much as it pained you to admit, he was right.  You were being stubborn and didn’t take into account the surrounding aesthetic of the area. It was your fault that the disagreement broke out in the first place. 

You got home and saw your phone had been basically blown up by notifications from Wilbur, asking if you were really mad at him or if it was for a bit that you took too far, but when you didn't answer he slightly snapped you, asking if you were okay and where you were.  You answered immediately, scared he might have been worrying.

Hey! You typed, Sorry I went for a walk after stream, needed to get out. 

There you are! He responded within seconds, I got worried. 

I’m okay, I left my  phone home, needed a break from the internet and things. You know? 

You mean you needed a break from me? 

You could have sworn, had you been on a video chat with him you would have seen him frowning. You weren't sure what about that message got you, but you found yourself almost with tears in your eyes, you didn't mean to hurt him and you hoped you didn't -what were you talking about. Wilbur didn't mean anything to you, he was just someone you kept in contact with because you were in the same friend group. 

No, you typed, not the whole thing at least. I just needed to clear my head, and i'm sorry for being such a dick on stream, I didn't mean to cause that, and you were right about the blocks. 

You sighed when hitting the send button, never in a million years did you think you would be telling Wilbur, The Wilbur Soot, that he was right about something. I’m sorry. 

Christ Y/N it’s alright, really. Just don't scare me like that again, I was starting to think something bad happened to you. 

I didn't mean to scare you, Wil. 

You found yourself feeling bad about leaving him in the dark while you were out, you didn't mean to worry him, you just didn't want to hurt him by blowing up at him. 

Still call tonight, yeah? He messaged 

You nodded, even though he couldn't see you. Yeah, I'd like that very much. I'll call you before I go to sleep. 

In the time that you had been a fake couple, you and Will had started calling while you were getting ready to fall asleep in bed, you usually ended up falling asleep before he did, the sound of his raspy sleepy voice lulled you to sleep like there was no tomorrow. You'd wake up in the morning to find that Wil left the call going, you thought it was cute. Sure it might have been some highschool relationship stuff but it was cute nonetheless. 

-

“Hello, Y/N” Will said through the phone, his voice sounding tired and soft  “Hi Wil,” You smiled, giggling slightly. Although you had just been on a voice chat with him earlier you loved hearing his voice when he was tired, it sounded like stirring honey into your morning cup of tea, or reading an old book, but specifically an old book that smells of must and age of being stored at the back of your grandparents bookshelf that hadn't been touched in years.  “You sound tired,” you mumbled, laying down with the phone resting on your stomach as you looked up at the ceiling.  “I am,” He hummed, “You don't sound very tired though, did you drink a lot of coffee today?” He asked  “A little more than usual, but I’ll be fine.” You sighed, your voice almost coming out in a whisper. There was something about talking to Wilbur before going to sleep that made you feel soft and loved, but you couldn't put your finger on exactly what it was. Maybe it was the thought of having someone there, or maybe it was just as simple as it was Wilbur and it was you.  

“Are you excited for next week?” He asked  “Right now it feels too far away to be real,”  “Who’s talking here, is it you you or is it us you?” He asked, unsure if your thoughts were good or bad “Its both,” You said. “It feels so far away to me right now, but so close at the same time and a side of me cant wait for it to get here, so we can finally meet in person. But another side of me feels like it’s good that it feels so far away because maybe something will come up and I wont be able to make it and i don’t want to think that or even say it because thats a terrible thing to say but you know how it is.” You rambled, trying your best to explain it to him in a way that he would fully understand the crossroads your mind is at, and not sound like a dick while doing it. 

Although you couldn’t see it, you could tell he was nodding along. “How about we make a deal, alright?” He started, “In these night chats, we don’t have to put on the face of the characters we play on stream and through out the day, Alright?”  You rolled over to your side, putting an arm under your head and setting your phone on the mattress by your head. “I like that. Deal.”  “Okay now tell me how you really feel about all of this” 

All the thoughts ran though your head a mile a minute, you didn’t know where to start honestly, you had a lot of thoughts but if you really looked at it and narrowed it down most of them talked circles around the same thing just using different words. 

“You promise what ever I say wont hurt you or make you flip out?” You asked  “Swear on Tommy’s life.” You could sense the smirk that tugged at the side of his mouth when he said that. “Okay,” You started with a sigh. “So I din’t really know where I stand on it anymore, at the beginning I thought this was going to be insufferable, but now that we’ve gotten into it for a few days, you’re really not that bad, but I’m still on the fence.”  “I hope come meeting, your opinion has changed a little bit more. But I do understand where you’re coming from. Its weird being able to talk off stream and such with you and not be fighting twenty-four-seven. It’s nice, I feel like I’m getting to know you better.” 

He was right, you had told Wilbur more in the last five days than you had ever in your years of knowing him. You were surprised to find out that he’s actually not as bad as you thought, but you would never tell him that bit. 

“Do you have to put on a character when we do those streams and such, Wilbur?” You asked, 

“I don’t think I do, and if I do it I don’t know what I’m doing it. It’s just something thats easy to do, I’m not sure how to explain it.” He replied “Do you have to when we’re talking like this?”  “No. Not at all, this is 100% me.” 

You’re not sure what part hit you the most, when he said he didn’t have to put on a full character mask when showing your ‘relationship’ to the public, or if this Wilbur, the tired one was the real Wilbur who you've been falling asleep with for the past three nights. You weren’t sure what you though you wanted to hear when asking him that but it definitely wasn't what you go, but maybe it was what you needed. 

The line went dead for a couple of minutes, you had the radio playing softly in the background to help you sleep better, and Wilbur seemed to be enjoying listening to you breathe through the phone.

“Hey Wil,” You yawned  “HM?” He hummed, you could tell he had his eyes closed with the phone by his face, like he did on one of your face time calls the other day.  “I’m soon gonna pass-out,” You whispered  “Thats alright, go to sleep. Get your rest, I’ll be here when you wake up, love.” He was so sweet it almost made your heart hurt.  “Okay” You nodded, but don’t hang up, okay? I like it when you’re here with me when I fall asleep.” 

You struggled to keep your eyelids open, feeling heavy and light all at the same time. You felt so light it was as if you could float away but you were too heavy and weighed down to get up and move, even if you absolutely had to move for whatever reason you don't think you could have. 

“Goodnight Wilbur, love you.” You mumbled into your pillow  “Sweet dreams.” 

[dreamingwithbts]

Lil Meow Meow Idol Vlive

Genre: Idol!Au; Fluff

Pairing: Yoongi x Idol!Reader

**********************❤**********************

I'm Y/N, I'm a rapper for the new girl group of Bighit but I know BTS for a long time and I was recently exposed to the world as Suga girlfriend with our consent of course, right now im in the hotel room with the boys in Japan for their concert, watching them playing some kind of game, I was laughing filming them when I got a notification of Yoongi doing a live.

I look to the others seeing the notification and laugh hard when Jimin gets up fast running to Yoongi hotel room while me and the others see the live watching Jimin knocking on his door and Yoongi ignoring him completely.

I watch Jimin coming back to our room pouting. "He ignored me." "Sorry Chimmy!" I say hugging him, and they all went back to playing the game while I watch his live.

Taking the opportunity of the distraction I leave the room to go to Yoongi room. I knock on the door and I hear him complaining and getting up. "Hey. I thought you were Jimin again. Come on." He says opening the door smiling at me and hugging me, I enter the room and go in front of the screen while Yoongi closes the door and go seats. "Hi army!" I wave. "Continuing ..." Yoongi says continuing what he was saying to the army pulling me to his lap.

"Who is that? Is that Y/N? It was true?" Yoongi reads the comments. "Yes. This is my extremely popular girlfriend rapper Y/N. It's all true." Yoongi says calmly while I wave nervous seeing the comments. "Yes! I'm Lil Meow Meow girlfriend." I say laughing making Yoongi look at me weird making me laugh more.

"What did the other members say about it?" I read out loud. "This is their fault." Yoongi says putting his head on my shoulder. "As they said " We couldn't take you two looking at each other in despair and love anymore "" I say laughing at the memory with Yoongi laughing too.

"What did they do?" Yoongi reads. "They texted me saying Yoongi didn't leave his studio for a week and that they were worried, so I went to the company and go to his studio." I say. "More like angrily entering my studio with smoke coming out of your ears." Yoongi interrupts me. "Well sorry I was worried!" "I wasn't there for a week!" "I didn't know that!" I say defending myself making Yoongi roll his eyes laughing. "Continuing. I enter his studio angry at him and start screaming at him loud and I still remember his big eyes looking at me shock! Then he got up and...." "And I kiss her to stop screaming." Yoongi continues smirking at the memory making me blush. "Yes! He kissed me, and he told me that he just got in the studio. So I took that time and I look at him and saw that he still got his coat on and that his PC on turning on and I explain everything." "Then we look outside, and we see the boys laughing at us and Tae and Hobi dancing screaming "THEY KISSED"" Yoongi says pouting. "I remember that! You glare at them and they run away scared!" I say laughing making him laugh.

"What happen next?" I read. "Well we went to dorm to talk away from the boys and now we are boyfriend and girlfriend." I say looking at Yoongi that was looking at me smiling with that gummy smile and I boop his nose knowing he wouldn't like me to kiss him in front of everyone, so we went back to army questions.

"Did you take revenge on the boys?" Yoongi reads. "Ya. Y/N had the perfect idea." "I made them think instead of bring us together that they make us hate each other!" I say smiling evilly. "It was perfect." Yoongi says. "The next day they had dance practise so both of us start entering the room fighting screaming really loud, they look at us really scared they weren't expecting that, so they tried to stop us and I left the room still faking and I laugh of their faces when I was out of room." I say laughing. "So when she left I kick the chair to be more realistic and ignore the boys completely, and than we start the practice normally." Yoongi tells his version. "You are so evil." I read the comments. "That's not the worse part! We had to stop the pranking because Jimin started crying." I say. "Oh yeah. He was really sad. But he was okay once Y/N hugged him and calling him her baby." Yoongi says smiling.

"What did the boys do after the prank? Why is Jimin her baby?" Yoongi reads. "The boys ignore us for days but Jimin and Jungkook couldn't take that much so after two days they started talking to us." Yoongi responds. "And Jimin his my baby because his so cute! Have you guys seen that face! You can resist that cute mochi face! So his my baby!" I say smiling at the camera knowing Jimin was watching.

"Why are you there with the boys? Shouldn't you been practicing?" I read the comments. "I'm on a break and so I decide coming here with the boys since they aren't staying too long. And I still practice when they are busy preparing themselves." I say a little sad looking at the comments. "I'm really happy she's here. She makes me more relax." Yoongi says tightening his arms on my waist smiling making me smile at kiss his head.

"Can't wait to see your next concert Y/N!" I read. "Thank you! Can't wait to see all of you!" I say sending heart fingers.

I get up from his lap so Yoongi can talk to army without me after I notice that they were starting to pau attention to me instead at Yoongi and he started answering questions for him and I stay from the side smiling looking at him with passion on his eyes reading the comments, that's until I receive a text from Namjoon. *Come to my room I have an idea for his live.* and I respond that I was on my way and I get up saying to Yoongi I was leaving and I go to Namjoon room that quickly opens the door.

"Here." Namjoon says giving me a bag and I look at him confused. "Jungkook somehow had Yoongi bag and there's your pajamas in there, I had an idea of you entering the live with Shooky pajamas and me with Koya pajamas and embarrassed Yoongi!" Namjoon says with his big dimple smile and I agree immediately loving the idea.

We get dress quickly and go again to Yoongi room with Namjoon at the front knocking on the door, we hear him yelling to come in, and we enter the room showing our pajamas like models and Yoongi looks at us with his judgment face making us laugh, and we both went to both his sides. "Hi army!" Namjoon waves and starts talking to them. "That's why you leave? To put my shooky pajamas?" He asks smiling. "I like them they comfy!" I say making him smile big. "Well I'm going now. Bye Army! See you tomorrow Yoongi! Thank you Y/N!" Namjoon says leaving the room.

"It's time for me to go to. Bye army!" He says and waves to the camera turning off after I say goodbye too.

Then suddenly Yoongi picks me up and throw us both on the bed. "Yoongi!" I scream laughing, and he puts his head on my chest. "Thank you for everything." He says and I start playing with his head making him start fall asleep. "Of course Yoongi." "I love you." "I love you too my Lil Meow Meow." I say laughing. "I don't understand that nickname!" Yoongi says confused making me laugh even more.

Note: Sorry for the delay! Hope you like it! @angelsmin 💜💜💜

[ancient-mystical-features]

the busy series (e-journal, again)

February 5, 2022

Busy Ep. 1

This probably won't be my last time of using that as a title, so I put an Ep. 1 so I can use it as an excuse to resuse the title. I'm not a fan of adding a title to these entries, but oh well. We're pretty busy with filling out the content plans with student's names for our class project. The project proposal is due on Monday. RIP us.

🚀

February 22, 2022

✉️

BU is so much work. Like why do I even bother going through all this process? Why do I even bother applying? I'm not even planning to go? As a lot of my friends say: "For clout lang." 🤡

🚀

March 11, 2022

7 days before my funeral

Due on March 18:

JECS Essay Exam

JECS Spoken Word PC

HMSS116 Poster (DONE)

HMSS116 Reaction Paper

🚀

March 12, 2022

Busy Ep. 2

I surprisingly did well with spontaneously interviewing someone for our project, especially that it had been my first time. It wasn't necessarily a comfortable experience but I mostly felt well. I am currently in another meeting and really busy with a lot.

Do not be deceived with the title. This is not just my second time being busy. I just use the title when I can't think of anything else and too busy to write a bunch.

🚀

March 13, 2022

5000 characters in one sitting

I got to write an entire essay in one sitting on a SUNDAY. I don't do stuff on Sundays intentionally. I dedicate Sundays and after-dinners for myself with no school nor org-related stuff to do unless if it's urgent. Since a lot are due next week on Friday, I figured I'd compromise last night and use that time to do one of the major stuff I needed to do. I uhh wasn't able to do that. But hey don't bite my ear off, I compromised Sunday anyways instead and I was able to finish my draft in one afternoon.

🚀

March 14, 2022

Busy Ep. 3

I can't write a lot right now but I'm working on something good!!

🚀

March 16, 2022

Busy Ep. 4

I finished all four major stuff to be submitted on Friday. Seems like I don't have to bury myself six feet below the ground after all.

🚀

March 25, 2022

Busy Ep. 5

I wrote another letter to myself last night, to be opened two years from now. I'm a little busy today prepping for tomorrow and finishing stuff and also attending a meeting and another after this one.

🚀

April 6, 2022

Busy Ep. 6

I remember typing that title yesterday, but something might have came up that got me distracted and I was unable to continue writing. Yesterday (or, well, the date in this entry) was quite a lot. We had to finish our project proposal and brainstorm on specifics so we could submit the proposal for approval in the morning so it wouldn't be pending until the end of the holy week. I was drained out yesterday but our late night call to brainstorm the rest of the stuff was fun and you could hear us either crying or laughing, we weren't sure. We even got to invite really great speakers (ONE OF THEM WHO I'M A FAN OF AND I CAN'T SPILL DETAILS BUT SINCE I BET THERE'S A GOOD CHANCE THAT NOBODY'S GONNA SEE THIS BUT HE WAS IN AHEB THE MUSICAL WOO). This event is a big one. And I hope we'll be able to keep our sanity by the end of it.

🚀

April 21, 2022

lots on my plate

One more move and I'll be experiencing another major burnout. I still have a PT due tomorrow and ALD and our culminating activity on my plate. I'm gonna take an hour break with an episode of OITNB before I fall apart.

🚀

April 23, 2022

work

We went to the vet this afternoon so work starts a little later than usual. I knew ALD was gonna be heavy but you never really realize just how heavy it is until a few days before the event when you're all in shambles.

🚀

April 24, 2022

prep

I am currently preparing the stuff to be donated for our Community Engagement Outreach.

🚀

April 26, 2022

Busy Ep. 7

It's been a while since I've watched OITNB. I don't even have a minute these days. It's reasonable though, and I kind of expected that. I just didn't expect myself to be mentally all over the place and not as organized as I was in my first project.

[the-firebird69]

Her son finally done some sleep it was up until midnight and it started many times and wasn't sleeping he told us I'm just very tired and take a little few days of it we lost sleep

It's much better it is

And it's going on this war of theirs and a lot of people got some sleep of hours and there's. He says I have to continue working

And I get it he's in a lot of work to get there it's not funny at all. I certainly have had enough of that so am I these people are crying out loud

The two said the above except for the first line and we're moving out too to hear and other locations or filling in and they're taking over they're economy is a mess doesn't really exist and the big mob of tommy f hasn't moved South yet and it's just sitting up there growing and Tommy Allen can't can't hit it enough and his force is smiling two quadrillion now and I haven't been going up there he said I might not be able to stop these people and we're still waiting PC and other locations along their path thier not doing anything about that. Thier still amassing though. About 50% of them are out of Russia that would be 20 quadrillion the rest look like they want to get out of there too they're piling out actually right now and pushing down not too far but 20 miles it's cold up there pretty soon they'll start marching down.

We have about 20 hokey people who are up now trying to get to our son so we're going to go after them I'm issuing warrants on them. And we have several lawsuits coming to fruition today and the real ones and they caused a lot of pain several losses in that there are three of them and one of them is

His adjudication and that would be for him being held in Marlborough hospital it is very surprised but he did not show up for three hearings and forfeit the lawsuit. And now it's both if you remembered $250, 000 already was awarded now it's 1.5 million plus the 250,000 and Tommy f has no more time to pay it and it's wanted as a fugitive and his assets can be seized to pay it so we're looking for him the format he was in Wich is close to Tommy favino. And we will remove his assets forcibly well not really the federal government will or state because their courts are entitled to. Wow he says that's a lot of money for me it would be huge and it's a buying cheap house I just live there so it's time to laugh because it's enough money to buy a decent house and you said about like a cheap one it means like a small new one or something I had 130 Grand if they make small new ones or build a small new one and people are disappointed at least not doesn't want a huge house too many of you screwing around with him. And doesn't Hot springs you have to do a sweep and you were there enforcing it but he wanted to

There's another lawsuit that came to fruition the other day and it was Saint Elizabeth's hospital and he's amazed can't believe that that would go through and did and we're suing them for unlawful imprisonment and detainment and won. And it was about 4 million dollars and I have to pay up and I have to pay up by the end of the day today if they don't the hospital is ours or a piece of their business meaning that we have rights to take their assets building is hard to take but access we can liquify would be nice. It's better if the court does it we like it too and we did notice that the court does take assets and liquifies them so it's good though probably do that if they don't pay

There's another place too it will have to pay up with Worcester hospital UMass I was sue them for about $10 million dollars and we won the lawsuit in court and it was videotaped and televised and people couldn't believe it I was the lawyer on the case and I was in on TV this is why that's great motivation. I look decent too I dont like a good friend looking guy in the mall. But seriously it happens it was on TV and the whole thing it was about a week long or 5 days plus 2 days of arraignment when we weren't really much on there there's 8 hour days and we're on TV about 4 hours out of 8 hours. And we won and we went about $8 million dollars wow and he was estimate no that's what it was and the court is sending the money and maybe you were the results of what it says and their code is for him to win these lawsuits and then you're supposed to try to win a lawsuit that's what it reads like when you thought it was phenomenal but she doesn't usually win lawsuits you people are bunch of pigs. And Max is finally saying he can't believe it I did it illegally he was encouraged to and your son says then because you did it because you were influenced to by my clan. This taboo and it's wrong to do and the computers work for my clan and you're sitting there looking at them cuz you're more on something you're stupid now. Anderson did not even have to peek in they didn't have to look into it we won the cases and you haven't set up so he has to do every single piece of everything if he wants hamburger he has to make sure that the hamburger company is functioning and all the sudden s*** it's all complete lies of course ever approving it but boy are you people are a bunch of assholes too I saw you at every place trying to stop it and grabbed you and will continue to and we're getting free Intel he calls it free until I call it take out

Now that's a lot of money for him to win this is something he says about St Elizabeth's it's not sitting right just the wind and to leave it and we did include the court case and they intend I'm paying so he says if they don't pay any others meaning they intercepted themselves we're going to go to criminal court with them for intercepting it themselves and for what they did was because it's criminal. This reference in the part we had no jury no trial it's based on hearsay for him being incarcerated cuz it never proven that he's ill at all matter fact it's brain looks perfectly fine and the impulses are fine most mental patients don't have that occurring you're going to present that as evidence too you have copies of the test and he can attest he was calm and mild mannered when they occurred that's what he said and my heart rate was fine too I'm going to sue for a lot more if they don't let the money through and any guesses that they're going to try and obstruct it

I will make a note here then if you try and obstruct it usually a lot of you die this is two sides to this coin I mean there's people of yours who want the money to get through and yeah they're foreigners and huge gobs of them are up there now and then trying to get the money out of them and they're going to start attacking you here also that you are blockade severe strict attack if it breaks loose what is it going to do fire on you

Bitol and Goddess Wife

[for-nuella-from-j]

#3

I PASSED.

So yeah I passed the first exam. There's two major exams we gotta pass before we "graduate" and start working and earning. Hurrah. I made it through the hardest one. That's when I started to actually enjoy class and interacting more with our batchmates. I started getting along really well with my designated group from the first exam and also friends from our group chat.

But before the exams, there were instances where N and I had mini interactions. Looking back, I think the first time she finally noticed me was when I sang for the class. Yeah you gotta sing when you come in late in zoom. What's funny was, I was already joking I'm prepared and I'm ready to sing when I come late. My PC decided to update on its own and I did come in late. I sang La Vie En Rose for the class and N said I had a warm voice, which was nice. She was the first one to appreciate my voice in our GC. I quickly forgot about that though. Weeks later, she got her turn to sing, which was actually a really funny story. She sent a supposed to be private message to one of our friends directly to the public chat saying she'd rather sing voluntarily than answer the oral quiz we were having. (Those who answer wrong will sing). Of course everyone saw it and she was forced to sing. BUT MAN, here's the plot twist, she CAN sing. She took her guitar and sang Collide by Howie Day for everyone. She sounded so good, I was fangirling so much. A close friend of mine, months later revealed she took a video of N's first (and sadly last) performance and I was caught headbanging away as she sang. It was magical. Enchanting. I think that was the moment I acknowledged I do, really am, very attracted to her. And not just because she is pretty and smart, but also because she had a wonderful talent and I'm such a sucker for musically-inclined people.

Our first real interaction was in our GC. The first time we addressed each other and not just going with the flow our class banters. She tagged me in the GC about a bike meme. That was our first interaction ever. I remember it clearly because I felt so happy someone was tagging me and was aware(?) that I loved biking. We weren't friends in Facebook yet that time but I wasn't sure if it was a random meme she randomly chose to tag me on but I was really happy about it. It was a quick and funny interaction but I felt the click there. Our humor is in sync.

I'm wondering what else we had in common since then.

[musicoccurred]

Mixtapes

The mixtape, a word that is dependent on who's using it and when. I'm middle-aged and came up in the 80s and 90s so it means something different to me than a kid today or a band camp rapper. Having said that, let's take a look at the different usages of mixtape and see if we can crown a winner of the top type of mixtape.

For those of us with achy knees and patches of gray in our hair, a mixtape was, first and foremost, actually on a tape. Now there were themes involved just as there are now with some of the others I'll mention in a bit. For instance, every Sunday there was Rick Dees Weekly Top 40 radio show. I would often drop a blank cassette in my boom box and hit record. I would then go watch TV in the living room and keep an ear out for the telltale 'click' of the tape running out. I'd run back to my room, flip the tape, and hit record again. You have to understand, before the internet, geez that never not sounds old, the radio ruled. Even with albums, cassettes, and later CDs you still listened to the radio all the time. That's why I love XM so much, there's something about having someone curate music for you. And even today with every song available at the tap of a finger there's something awesome when your jam comes on the radio. It just hits different. I digress. So now at the end of the countdown you have the top 40 songs of the week, or however many you had enough tapes for... You can now make a mixtape of your favorite tracks. Radio also had "Request and Dedication" shows where you could call in and request a song and give a little dedication to your amore. You could record that and toss it at the beginning of the mixtape and good things happen. Another type would be artist specific. Say you were a Michael Jackson fan, you could take Off the Wall, Thriller and Bad and make a tape of your favorite songs from each. Another would be genre, when I was first getting into blues and jazz, I'd borrow tapes from my Mom and friends to make mix tapes. And last but not least, the mixtape for your love interest. These were the ultimate, you'd diligently record songs from the radio and mix in a song or two from either an artist she didn't know or an obscure song from a known artist to show you were a deep brother. You weren't done yet! You'd then work hard on the label and of course the note to go along with those 10 songs that perfectly sum up your feelings for that person. On a side note, I'd like to take this opportunity to say if you were the object of my unrequited affection and received one of these, I apologize. Unless you liked it, then, hey girl.

Next up we have the burned CD mixtape. It is the evolutionary cousin to the cassette mixtape. While it took a while for CD burners to become ubiquitous, they eventually showed up, primarily in PCs. What was lost in recording from the radio was picked up by being able to download from Napster and pass along. Additionally, you could write or draw on the CD itself and the labels, if you went that route, were larger for track listing and any other info you wanted to toss in there.

Now we're moving on to the streaming portion of the discussion:

Note: I'm using playlist and mixtape interchangeably here.

One step removed from the burned CD and what seems lightyears beyond the cassette technologically is the custom, personally curated playlist. This can be a playlist you do for yourself; I have several in Spotify. I will sometimes dump an entire artist's collection in there to shuffle, or perhaps include only the tracks I like best. I also have one for jazz and one for funk called 'greasy.' But in the spirit of this piece, I'm thinking of a playlist that you create for someone else and share the link with them. I actually like this, not only can you send them a custom mix of songs that can express how you feel about them, but you can update the playlist anytime. It can be romantic or simply sharing new tunes with a homie.

Next, we have the algorithmically created playlist. When you sign in Spotify (I'm assuming other services offer similar features) and you get the daily list or the multiple "just for you" selections, this is what I'm referring to. Spotify uses the data from your listening habits to create playlists with songs from artists they think you'll like. It's pretty accurate with a few swings and misses. I have to say I'm a fan of including these playlists as well as listing other artists similar to the one you're listening to. I've discovered so many new bands this way. Alternatively, there are playlists that are created based on other factors. I work out with playlists on Spotify and XM such as Hip hop workout or Lithium Workout. These are likely created based on a beats per minute count. Some don't really fit the workout but have a faster beat. Overall, I like this style of mixtape/playlist.

Finally, we have the artist mixtape. This is generally hip hop but isn't necessarily limited to any specific genre. I relate it to an EP being released prior to an LP back in the day. Some of these have very rapid turnarounds, like a day or two so sometimes the quality of the mix isn't that great but topically it's right on time.

So how do these rank in terms of which mixtape format is best? Let's find out!

5. Artist Mixtape - This may be one of those "not for you" cases but I'm not a fan of most of these I've heard. Some are pretty good, but most feel rushed or worse, don't have a cohesive feel to the tracks. The ability for artists to drop tracks near instantly is pretty amazing and I do like the idea of it. We'll see how that continues to develop.

4. Algorithmically created playlist - While I use these pretty much every single day, they lack the human touch - hello, algorithm - which is what makes the mixtape great.

3. Burned CD - I probably surprised you here with this at number 3. I do think it has a lot of strengths and is still a physical object that gives the human touch. But there were some issues. If you're old enough to have gone through the burned CD era, you'll know the pain of burning a CD for it to simply not work. Sometimes the person you gave it to had a CD player that wouldn't play those or you needed a CD -R or +R or RW, it was awful.

2. Personally curated playlist - While fully digital and not that personal this does have the ability to add and remove songs as you go. Plus, when you email the link to the person you can toss in a nice note about how you thought about them when making it.

1. Cassette - I mean come on, it's called a mixTAPE right? Clear winner here. Yeah, I'm old but there was something about it.

Epilogue:

I listen to either streaming music or records. I'm resisting the urge to get back into cassettes even though I have a couple decks and tapes. My cassette collection didn't survive growing up. Honestly, I have no idea where they went. I still have my CDs but before I would play a CD, I would stream it. There's something human about playing a record or a cassette. We are a touching, feeling creature and it means something to flip that tape over or to hold the liner notes on a record. I think that's lost on the younger folks. As everything is digitized and available on a screen it loses some of its meaning. I like buying concert tickets online but man, there's something about lining up at Macy's or JC Penney's or wherever your ticket office was and buying a physical ticket they handed you. When I have the option, even if it's a couple bucks more I still try to get physical tickets. In 20 years, I can look at that stub and remember the show, I can't do that with a barcode on an app.

What's your favorite format or mixtape/playlist?

-js