#two can play the sass-master game

[sleepingdeath-light]

relationship hcs ; astarion

requested by ; mod / self indulgent

fandom(s) ; baldur’s gate 3

fandom masterlist(s) ; here

character(s) ; astarion ancunin

outline ; “dating headcanons for astarion”

note ; i have never played this game and am going completely off of the clips and guide videos i’ve been watching pretty much nonstop for the past week so apologies if my characterisation is at all shaky in this piece

warning(s) ; brief references to canon torture, self worth struggles, and other related angst — but otherwise mostly fluff!

when it comes to being in a relationship with you — a real relationship, that is, and not the act he was putting on to try and manipulate you at the start of your journey as a group — astarion is, for lack of a better analogy, very much so a fish out of water

and, thankfully, that’s not something he’s ashamed or scared to admit to you, so the early days of your relationship are filled with a lot of trial and error as you navigate your new dynamic and he adjusts to being permitted to make his own decisions and set his own boundaries

some things definitely come easier than others for him — namely verbal shows of affection like using pet names for you or being playful or flirty whenever you’re together; things that are more instinct than anything else, but no less genuine in their use

as one might expect, astarion does also use quite the variety of pet names for you — to the extent that your friends have a running joke about him not actually knowing what your real name is (which he always refutes with about as much sass as one might expect) — with his main terms of endearment being ones that he settled into using early on like ‘darling’, ‘beautiful’ (or ‘handsome’ if that is your preferred term), ‘my dear’, and, when he’s being a bit of a tease, ‘my little treat’

actual physical intimacy, however, is a much different story given his rather unfortunate history with his body and how he was forced to use it by his tormentor

of course he knows that you’re different, that you’re not like cazador or his ilk, but that doesn’t make those old habits any easier to break, nor two hundred years of trauma easier to shake from his mind — love and patience can only go so far, after all, and those memories and their effects on him won’t just vanish overnight

so, naturally, that means that adjusting to physical touch unrelated to sex is a very slow process for him — though he’s thankful to have you there with him throughout

there are a few things that he learns he really quite enjoys and makes that abundantly clear to you when you’re together: kisses, gentle touches to the hand, and hugs, mainly

oh and his kisses are truly marvellous once you help him accept intimacy unconnected to sex — they’re soft and sweet but no less passionate for it, starting off with a brief peck before he turns his head and gently (oh so gently) grasps your chin or cheek or neck and pulls you closer to him, almost as if you’re melting into each other as the kiss either deepens or makes way for a string of chaste pecks before you eventually pull apart for whatever reason

he also always makes sure to sooth any places he’s bitten with some apologetic kisses once he’s had his fill (as well as plenty of compliments on your person and about your blood)

his other favourite places to kiss you are either on your hands or wrists (the gentleman that he is): the insides of your wrists, the tips of your fingers, each of your knuckles in sequence, the backs of your hands, your palms when you cup his face in your hands — truly the list is endless and he delights in finding new ways to fluster you and make you smile

shit talking and gossipping amongst yourselves is extremely common and astarion has mastered the art of saying just the right thing about someone he doesn’t like just loud enough for you to hear at the perfect time to make you laugh (or try your best to cover said laugh if you’re currently talking to the subject of said shit talking)

when it comes to sleeping arrangements, astarion just loves being held (but not too tightly so he still has the freedom to get up and walk away for whatever reason if he needs to), but the specifics of the position don’t really matter to him — he’s just as happy to have you laying on his chest, or him on yours if you’re larger than him, as he is to cuddle you on his side (though he does secretly prefer to either be the little spoon or to have his face level with your chest when you’re both on your sides as it makes him feel safer, though it will take him a long time to ever even consider admitting to that)

he is naturally very protective of you and has been known to pull a dagger on anyone he deems as a threat to you — which is very beneficial in combat scenarios or situations where you are actually at risk, but a bit inconvenient when you’re trying not to draw any attention to yourselves and the issue is just some drunk that can’t keep quiet (still not good and something that should be called out, but perhaps not worth having to leave the town you just got to early as to avoid getting charged with yet another crime)

he doesn’t quite know what to do with himself whenever you’re unwell for whatever reason (especially if it’s something a healer can’t contend with) because it’s been centuries since he’s experienced any sort of illness so he can’t even really empathise with you about your situation — he tries his best, of course, but it’s easy to tell that he’s really out of his depth

no matter how long the two of you have been together, astarion still melts whenever you ask his permission to do the smallest of things (like asking if you can kiss him or hold his hand, for example) — but he melts even more when you accept when he declines for whatever reason becaus the novelty of being respected and loved without expectation or conditions never really wears off for him and he appreciates it all just as much as he did the first time

[batwritings]

Kinktober Day 17 - Public

More demon shenanigans! I love Diavolo too much ya'll, can you tell? Enjoy!~

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The restaurant wasn’t anything short of what you’d come to expect from the prince of the Devildom. Fancy dresses and suits everywhere you looked around the room that were accentuated by the glittering lights above you both. And it wasn’t even for some kind of special occasion either; you and your lover were here because you simply could be.

Yet this was by no means your typical dinner, oh no. See, you and Diavolo had this little game that you liked to play. Whenever the two of you had a differing opinion on something, such as a date day, you’d go somewhere public with a little surprise that nobody who was any the wiser could see. The first one to come undone by the vibrations was the loser.

“Darling?” The prince’s voice draws you out of your thoughts that were certainly not meant for such a public place. The low buzzing of the bullet against your most sensitive spot could be felt through your entire body. “Is everything alright?” You cursed your royal lover in your mind, wanting nothing more than to jump the man where he sat.

“Yeah, I am,” you lie, crossing one leg over the other. It doesn’t help, but does serve to add more pressure to your already aching sex. “What about you dear?” You fiddle with a ring on your right hand and watch Diavolo sit up just a bit straighter. A satisfied smirk crosses your lips, and it’s returned by the demon across from you.

“Just lovely,” he purrs, knowing full well the consequence of his words. This little game wasn’t played without blatant rules. Any check-in’s or certain words earned one point on to the opposing person to turn the toy up a notch. 

And for the moment, all is quiet again. The prince tries to be stealthy, using his foot to rub along your leg and he chuckles darkly when he watches you stiffen. A waiter comes by to ask a question and you take this opportunity to turn the little bullet in your lover’s slacks up two notches.

Diavolo’s words stutter a bit, but he plays it off as a brief coughing fit. “Are you alright young master?” the waiter asks, clearly concerned. Dark golden eyes watch you carefully in their peripheral. 

“Perfectly fine,” the prince answers with a confident smile, thus having the waiter leave the two of you in peace. “Two in one go? That’s a cheap shot Y/N.”

You smile innocently back at him. “A distraction and an attempted cheat are cause for points my love,” you tell him, quoting something he’d told you during a previous round. You feel the bullet ramp up on your end and barely cover a squeak.

“And sassing is cause enough for me,” Diavolo tells you, voice dipping down to an octave you only here when the two of you are alone. “Now behave for me, won’t you?” You bite your lip and take a deep breath to calm your frazzled senses. You couldn’t lose, not now.

Your dinner had nearly finished, and the both of you were teetering on the edge of completion. your bullet had been sitting at level 8 for the last 15 minutes, and you were beginning to lose your mind. Thoughts of your royal lover abandoning all common sense and decency to bend you over the table in front of the whole restaurant amongst other debauched things were flooding your thought to the point your answers were getting shorter and shorter.

Diavolo wasn’t exactly faring much better; you could see in the way his eyes were clouded over, dark with lust and desire each time he looked to you. You knew the kind of thoughts that plagued his mind and couldn’t wait to see where it got you. It was all too much, you couldn’t take it anymore.

Your foot tapped his to try and beg for mercy, so you wouldn’t come undone in public like this. Unfortunately for you, you and your lover knew what the other signed up for. All he offers you is a patient smile and his hand to hold. 

Your orgasm hits you like a freight train as you bite into your lip to try and hold back the noises that would’ve brought so much attention on the two of you. It was only made worse with the man before you cranked that little ring up, bringing the vibe up to max. You squeezed onto the demon prince’s hand for dear life, hoping to all the gods out there that nobody notices.

The only noise that made it out was a tiny whine when the overstimulation of having the bullet against your sex began to be too much. Diavolo was quick to shut it off, rubbing his thumb across the back of your hand as a silent praise. The waiter from earlier was quick to arrive and ask if you were alright. Thankfully for you, and your lack of words, your royal lover was quicker. 

“They’re alright, but I do think they’ve had enough of the public for one night.”

[spaceorphan18]

The Rogue and Gambit Project: The Basketball Game (X-Men #4)

Alright! Here we are! That pivotal moment we've all been waiting for! The introduction of Omega Red.... Wait, no, that's not why you guys are here? You don't want me to dissect another Wolverine story that digs into the seemingly never ending well of his past? You aren't really interested in the creepy twins that make up Fenris? And you don't really care all that much about what's going on with Moira?

I mean, fine, if you'd rather I get into all the other boring stuff going on in the issue... ;)

Today we're going to test the limits of how much of an issue Marvel will let me repost without getting in some kind of trouble....

X-Men #4 Ladies and Gentlemen....

I believe I said this previously, but one of the best parts of X-Men comics is really the soap opera shenanigans that go on in-between all the big villains. The inner personal relationships that happen among the X-Men are really the best, and often the most delicious part of the comics. I honestly think fans would be entirely happy if we got full issues of them just playing basketball, or baseball, or hanging out at Harry's Hideaway, or getting therapy.... Because these personalities are so much fun and play off each other so well that sometimes they are far better than the endless 'save the world' story lines we often get because - apparently - all published fiction needs a plot to hang on.

But I digress. It's a post-Claremont world now, and all bets are off. It's kind of interesting that - despite Gambit and Storm's initial friendship, the two X-Men Gambit has been spending the most time with lately are Wolverine and Jubilee. There's no surprise, really, that Wolverine and Gambit have an antagonistic relationship. Jubilee, however, due to her relationship with Wolverine, has been somewhat of a sass master towards Gambit as well. Except now we have Jubilee on the same team as Gambit, which, turns the dynamic a little on its head. And it's a delight.

And then we throw Rogue into the mix. How did this game even get started anyway? My guess - Jubilee wanted to play and taunting and teasing of some sort got the four of them paired off as they are. I kind of love that not only is Gambit goading Wolverine about relaxing, but Jubilee is, too.

Remember when I said Gambit spends most of his non-uniform time half naked? Continuity! ;)

Wolverine is not the only one who needs to relax. Rogue is wound tight - and I really doubt it's about wanting to adhere to a non-powered game of basketball.

All that skin and sweat? The girl's got some pent up needs that haven't been met during the entire previous decade. Probably time to rectify that.

I love Jubilee's commentary, she is so obnoxiously sassy, and I love it. Also, I kind of love that they are taking the time to set up Gambit's athletic skill.

Btw, I love the kind of smirk he gives Rogue as he easily tosses the ball over her head. He's having fun. Is she having fun? Hard to say - mostly she just wants to win. And Gambit is most definitely getting under her skin. The hilarity coming from Jubilee isn't helping.

Is this a good time to bring up the whole -- he's playing games and messing around with her and she takes things seriously part of their whole story? Is this entire game just a metaphor for the early part of their relationship?

I mean - you can read into it as deeply as you like! I have a feeling the writers didn't think think that hard about it - and this is merely just a way to show off all of their skills. But it definitely can be interpreted that way. I mean, what are we even doing here if we can't extrapolate intended and non-intended things from the text?

Of course, this is an X-Men story, so we can't go too long without the usage of powers. Everything is going to get thrown up a notch. Is Gambit using his powers of agility? Well, idk how he couldn't be using them since it's a natural thing.

But man, does Rogue hate losing or what? The escalation of this whole thing goes from 0 to 100 like that.

Jubilee lowering her glasses kills me every time.

I do think Gambit was just taking it easy and playing around at the beginning of this. I think he liked getting Jubilee on his side and cheering him on. He liked driving Wolverine crazy. And more than anything, getting under Rogue's skin is a challenge he really seems to take pleasure in.

But Rogue did take it up a notch, so Gambit does what he always does - and ups the ante.

It's interesting - I think if we hadn't had the little bit of flirting in X-Men #3, this whole thing may read a little differently (up until this point). But I think we're at the point where it's clear that they physical one-upmanship is masking the sexual tension.

I mean, their screwing around literally blows a hole through the mansion wall. Idk why, but this always has me dying, too. There's some very serious stuff going on with Moira - meanwhile Rogue and Gambit are at the playground throwing dirt at each other because they like each other.

No, but here's one of the things I like about them. It was all fun and games, and then Rogue did throw the first punch. And then Gambit pushed back. There's going to be a lot of shifts in power dynamics as we go through this, but the thing is, they don't really back down from each other. For better or for worse.

Ah, the infamous panel!

You saw how angry Rogue was just a second before, and then Gambit scoops her up in his arms and starts spouting all this romantic stuff she's longed to hear and for a moment, she's just kind of gone.

Btw, I love the details of this panel. The mansion is in ruins. Cyclops is like, uh, dude, you may want to throw some cold water on yourself. Jubilee, child that she still is, is like - ew bleck, they're gonna kiss now.

I love it!

I love that Gambit does not care that there is an audience (in fact - he may thrive on it), he's getting under Rogue's skin and it's worth all the fooling around. Meanwhile, Rogue maybe not really realize it yet - but she's getting someone who is not running the other direction due to her powers.

Plus, look, they're both just attracted to each other. And sometimes that fact is just fact.

I realize the above panel is the more famous one, but these ones. Man, they get me every time.

The first panel - Rogue just lets herself go with it. The second panel, though. That's a smirk. Rogue is 100% smirking because in that moment she is happy she is in the exact position she's in. And for that half second, she's enjoying it.

Which leads to an interesting thought experiment -- what if Rogue didn't have the powers she has. Would this whole thing end in a real kiss? (The answer is yes - some fucking around would have surely been had!) Would their relationship be as deep and real if they could act on their physical attraction? Would they have developed the good friendship they get over the years if there wasn't that initial barrier there?

Hard to say, but I think the story becomes richer having to work around her powers.

And.... we're back to the status quo as Rogue does have a skin condition that sucks the life out of everyone she touches. It's no longer a game, but the reality she has to face every day.

Also - I do kind of love she knocks him sideways. He does deserve being knocked down a peg every once and a while. Good for his humility.

The basketball game is now over, but I do think this is the real beginning of Gambit trying to win over Rogue's heart -- and yes, I think at first, it's merely for the sake of the challenge of it. I don't think he takes in account that he's going to change his own heart as we go along.

Just for completion's sake -- here's the last little bit of this part of the subplot. I do roll my eyes at the fact that Wolverine always has to come out looking the coolest. But it works for a nice tag to this particular scene.

So.... later...

Now, how did we get from the basketball game to what looks like a date? Especially since when last we saw Rogue was knocking him sideways? SHAMELESS PLUG TIME - I WROTE A FIC ABOUT IT. Or, you know, come up with your own headcanons. ;)

Of course Gambit rides a motorcycle - because this is the 90s, and this is the height of cool, lol.

I love Rogue in this moment. I love that she's owning him here. She knows she looks good. She knows she wants to go out and have a good time. She may even know she wants to have a good time with /him/ but won't think too much about that -- and instead enjoy the possibility of her own happiness first. Having an attractive man at her side is just a bonus. Go get it, girl!

This is why I love X-Men. Because they are such a family dynamic. Everyone is getting into everyone else's business. Jubilee is the younger sister just wanting to hang out with her ridiculous, cool older brother. Wolverine is that watchful, old uncle. Beast is the next door neighbor who doesn't care that he's butting in, he's just there for a good time. I love all of it! And I do love that there is a tad bit of protectiveness for Rogue. Gambit is still new to this dynamic (not that Rogue and Beast have spent any time together, lol).

The point is that they all love each other like family, and I adore that.

I love that Gambit just is not here for that family dynamic. This is almost a sitcommy moment, and it's delicious. I also love that Rogue is completely on board with this whole date aspect. Sure, her friends will be there, too. But she's not opposed to Gambit whisking her away for who knows what. Maybe she'll get that candlelight dinner and champagne and a little lite romance he's promised her.

I love Jubilee pouting! It also makes me wonder if he's already taken Jubilee out for a spin for the fun of it. He would.

So, her line is fascinating because there are different ways you can read it. Skeptical that he could actually out maneuver Beast. Or hopeful that he will. Read it any way you like! But the smile on her face says she won't be unhappy to lose her friends.

And BAM! Hit by the plot!

Stupid plot.

It's funny, because his first thought is to see if she's okay. Of course she is, she's invulnerable and she can take the hit. But I honestly think that in that moment, he is concerned for her. There is a bit of genuine care there -- even if she is quick to dismiss it.

And... as Omega Red inserts himself into our fun loving drama, the issue ends, with Rogue and Gambit tied up (and eventually in chains) which is going to become the norm for them, so get used to it. ;)

Honestly, I love this issue - and it's such a fun way to start their story. And I had forgotten that at least half of the issue is comprised of Rogue and Gambit development.

Shame we have to stop the development to get into the Omega Red arc that will take up the next few issues...

[acourtofquestions]

These Dorian & Rowan chapters are absolute GOLD:

THE BROMANCE (their bro based friendship is unmatched… maybe my fav thus far, I’m just enjoying this so much)

Dorian being Dorian (I needed this after the pain of QoS; like yes, he’s different now (how could he not be?) but in a way that is slowly healing & maybe a little “broken”; but still Dorian; beloved Dorian🥹)

Rowan being Rowan (in a way we have yet to see that honestly is just SUCH Celaena vibes; their sass is unmatched and I. AM. HERE. FOR. IT.)

Dorian FINALLY having someone appreciate him for all he is worth & Rowan being the person to appreciate & respect him for all of his own genius/goodness/loveliness/skills BECAUSE HE HAS THEM (instead of underestimating & not communicating) like THIS MAN (not only has unmatched levels of magic) but he is a diplomat, a war planner, A PROPER KING. He has survived in the shadows a lifetime (living with A VALG PRINCE) and then ACTUALLY LIVING WITH ONE in his brain; yet he remains grounded in morality, fighting for goodness, for his people & all people. He reads people, his empathy & compassion is a power in itself, he knows how to play the game; use the phrases; make deals and wage alliances. He is level headed, he can plan a part, he keeps it together & has a dam good poker face. He is smart, he is quick on his feet. And he is JUST GOOD; he is a good man. A good king. A good… well… HE’S JUST DORIAN. & Rowan has a great ability to see peoples powers & skills, to teach & empower. And THEY needed this.

Because vice-versa Dorian REALLY appreciates Rowan the way he deserves; instead of fearing him, being angry & bringing up hundreds of years of “what if” & “why not”, instead of feeling the need to puff his chest & “prove” something, creating an environment of distrust & disrespect, or just disregarding annoyance; here he is, thanking him, asking to learn, listening & learning, understanding him, speaking of their lives in honesty, seeing what he’s doing & giving up, treating him as an equal not a lesser or a prejudice just a friend. It is refreshing after centuries to meet a good king, a good man.

The way they work together; they have a great natural ease & understanding. They speak & LISTEN. There isn’t a “captain” or wage for leadership, they just both respect & use the other & their own skill set. They are working both for the present, but also building of the future, while piecing together a lot of pain still aching in their past. They make great diplomats but also warriors. Good cop & bad cop. Hilarity of their youth and age. Just this great balance that’s wholesome & entertaining. You really get to see THE Princes. (Though let’s be honest they are THE KINGS).

The two of them managing to GET. SHIT. DONE. Save the king✔️ Escape Rifthold safely✔️ master their skills & magic (before something explosive happens)✔️ secure an army✔️ build alliances✔️ keep tabs on Maeve✔️ plan for Wyrdkeys✔️ finding Ilken Island (I think this is a check) ✔️

And even as the lovely @mysterylilycheeta mentioned they have a friendship based on more than a mutual pining, love, or heartbreak of a female character. They show emotion. And have a genuine friendship. Frankly it’s just refreshing!!

… so while I miss Aelin & Rowan, anxious to see how Aedion & Gabriel play out, needing Manorian’s ship to fly… etc. I also kinda just want the road trip of fun bromance to continue😂🫶

[kay-wren]

I'll Come Running - R.C. - Chapter 1

JJ, Kiara, John B, Pope, and Sarah were all sitting at the Chateau trying to figure out a plan to get their gold back from Rafe Cameron. With Rafe's dad, Rose, and Wheezy presumed dead on the yacht that killed them all, the 22 year old is the sole proprietor of what Ward stole from the Pogues. Sarah still couldnt figure out why Ward decided to die on the Druthers with Rose and Wheezy in tandem, it seemed very selfish if you were to ask her. But even more so than that... why did Ward not go down with his whole family? Did he have some master plan in keeping Rafe and Sarah alive? Or was he doing it just despite them? Those thoughts tormented Sarah ever since the incident. She had to remove herself from those ideas though in order to help the pogues. Still, she sat at the Chateau inevitably out of it.

"We've gotta get the gold back man, that's ours!" JJ exclaimed with disgust and anger in his voice as he slammed his fist on the table and clung to his favorite ball cap.

"Yeah, I know man, that's what we're trying to figure out." John B sassed, clearly already over the day that they were having. 

"I don't know what else there is to do. I mean Rafe's taking the gold to the Bahamas None of us can get on that plane, and none of us can get there otherwise." Pope stated.

"Kie, maybe your parents could spot us the cash for some plane tickets." JJ said frantically looking over at Kiara.

"Um no, they made it very clear that they are done with our antics, they don't even know that I'm here right now!" She retorted back with a hint of irritation in her voice as she narrowed her eyebrows towards JJ.

JJ put his hands on his head and started breathing heavily as he paced around the Chateau trying to find a solution.

"Face it man, the gold is gone. There's literally no way we can get to it." Pope exclaimed matter-of-factly, trying to be the only logical thinking person in the group at the moment.

"NO, there has to be a way! I'm not just going to let him take what's ours. Alright? That's happened too many times in my life man and I'll be damned if I let it happen again!" JJ said with even more anger in his voice. 

"We all know there's only one person in this world that can control Rafe Cameron..." Sarah trailed off, not even making eye contact with any of the pogues. Sarah held a distant stare into nothing and a gaping hole in her mouth. 

They all looked up and glanced around the room with looks of confusion, trying to see who would know the answer to Sarah's riddle. Sarah eventually looked at JJ. Once everyone realized who she was she was referring to, they all looked at JJ as well, almost with a look of pity.

JJ slowed his pacing, took his hands off his head, and looked back at the pogues and started shaking his head slowly.

"No, no way man. She made it very clear that she was gone, okay? She doesn't want to be wrapped up in all this, and I'm not going to be the one to bring her back into it. No way!" JJ stated more calmly but still with conviction as he held one hand to his chest, feeling like it might be tightening from the stress of the very idea. 

There was a pause, as if nobody knew what to say next. They all knew where JJ was coming from, but this was the only way to get back into the game. Sarah finally spoke up.

"Don't tell her why. Just tell her you need her."

"I'm not going to lie to her." JJ said as his voice cracked with small tears in his eyes, tears of anger or sadness no one could really tell.

"JJ, she'll do it for you." John B said with a sympathetic look in his eye as he wrapped an arm around JJ's shoulder to console him.

JJ and John B shared a look between the two of them, as if an argument was going on simply in their eyes. JJ's look was calloused. John B's look was hopeful.

"F-fine." JJ said as he sucked in a breath to fight back more tears. "But if she gets hurt in any way, we're done." he said as he looked down to the ground playing with his fingernails.

They all nodded seriously as if to make it clear that they understand the assignment.

"I don't even know where she lives man, all she gave me was her number years ago." JJ laughed looking up at John B.

"Well then looks like we're going to see if that number still works." John B smiled.

[rae-raewrites]

Hello, I love your writing sm and if it’s okay, could you please possibly write some hcs about Arkham Riddler and Scarecrow with a fem or gn s/o that gives them like extreme sass when they try to manipulate or gaslight/ try to make s/o upset?

It’s always so fun writing for these two I swear also thank you teh!

Arkham riddler and scarecrow with a s/o who sasses them

Riddler

He’s had people sass him over the years. Usually those people never see the light of day again

You’re an exception.

You had problems simply to fix one of the hundreds of riddler trophies from flickering.

“I thought the original demonstration might have been enough but it seems like you need help with such a simple concept My dear.” “Well then it sounds like you need better teaching methods Mr nigma.”

You stop him dead in tracks.

Did you just-? Sass him?

Oh…….he sees how it is.

S/o are you sure you want to do this? He’s sassed the entire criminal underworld and Batman,his intelligence extends to more than just complex knowledge.

It essentially becomes a war of sass for days.

“S/o the drill,please?” “Nope don’t want too.”

It slightly bothers him at first because he’s assuming you’re undermining him but you end up actually getting him interested.

Be careful though if he knows anything about you at all personally,he knows how to dish out some.

However do be mindful if his ego has taken a hit that day,he can play the game sure but he’s constantly dealing with people actually trying to degrade him so somedays it can be……a little too much on the mental processes.

Scarecrow

Jonathan crane isn’t just the master of fear he’s also the master of emotionally gaslighting you into oblivion

Emotional distress? Nonsense just a bit of anxiety perfectly normal!

The best way to actually sass him is to completely stop his attempts at scaring you

“Are you scared?” “I’m supposed to be scared?”

He may not be as spry as he was back before the croc incident but he can find the humor in something like this.

It is rather interesting to test how far this can go isn’t it?

Where does the sass end and the feint sense of courage begin?

“Surely you understand you can only do this for so long my sweet. Fear is inevitable.” “Ya keep saying that but I’m definitely not afraid.”

Oh don’t worry he won’t use any toxin,it just means he has to hone his skills.

He can play the long game but just be prepared to deal with the repercussions.

[woodstoneb-b]

OK, so it turns out that when you've got a B&B the Christmas season is hella busy - which seems like something that should have been obvious. But yeah, the wife and I have been run off our feet.

But, I've finally had a chance to play the game so let's get into it!

Not gonna lie, this hits a bit too close to home, we just started the game and the kitchen sink is already broken!

Flower: Wow...a waterfall indoors, this is totally groovy, man!

Hetty can be...kind of dramatic.

Hetty: I did not give permission for such an image to be shown... Although...are there Cheetos in this game?

Afraid not...but that looks pretty good.

Hetty: Yes, as you can see I'm simply thrilled.

Hetty: I will say that I very much appreciate the punctuality of the workmen is this game... Certainly not Irish.

Hetty: When I was alive I never would have allowed outsiders to see me in my swimwear, but...seeing as this is not actually me, I suppose I can allow it. And I'll even admit that I was most fond of swimming, a very refreshing pastime indeed! I can't say I ever went swimming on the ocean however...which is a shame if the scenery is like this!

Meanwhile back at the Mansion, these two are fully immersed in reading.

Isaac: I say, that's a most accurate representation of myself! These computers are amazing.

Thor: Isaac speaks for himself, Thor does not read.

Sass (low voice): It's more like he can't.

OK, I'm not sure why No-Pants went down to the beach...

Trevor: All the babes hang on the beaches!

Hetty: I'm not sure if I should be flattered by that...?

Trevor: Your Simself obviously thinks so, you got me a little gift!

Hetty: Well, now I understand why it's called virtual reality...

Thor: This is more like it! In life Thor was well-regarded as a fisherman, Thor could name all varieties of cod in the area, there was the -

He had a lot more to say, but...yeah, there's a word limit on these posts, so...

Hetty: Why on earth am I sleeping on the beach like some sort of vagrant?! And why am allowing you to show such outlandish images of me?

Trevor: Sleeping on the beach is totally cool.

Hetty: In the middle of summer? I'd think not.

Thor: Jay's game is learning, Thor does not abide messiness! If only Thor could clean in real world...Jay leaves sink in unspeakable state.

For any current guests and possible guests reading this, this is not true.

Sam: It really, really isn't, our B&B has received the highest hygiene certification.

Hehehe, Sims have to do whatever you tell them to, so here's No-Pant's being useful.

Trevor: Seriously?!

Trevor: Oh hey, I did it! Not that I'm surprised, I've got the magic touch.

Hetty *giggles*

My eyes! MY EYES!

Trevor: Hey, just giving the ladies what they're asking for.

Pete: Why am I there?

Trevor: Well, it's my bedroom, so...you tell me.

After that horror, I sent my man, Pete, downtown to the library, now I feel like this is a Sims 3 thing, because the one nearest us sure doesn't have tropical drinks!

Pete: Wow...somewhere that's not the mansion?! It's so...weird. Almost as weird as me drinking out of a coconut. That's strictly a vacation activity

Pete: This takes me way back! Identifying animals out in the wild was something I was a master at in the Pine Cone Troopers.

Sass: As much of a master as you were with archery?

Thor: Heh, burn.

Isaac: Thorfinn, you're asking about my book! :D

Thor: Game has once again not lived up to reality.

Alberta: I am loving my look here, Jay, you've got everything right.

Thor: Even funny hat.

Alberta: I'm pretty sure Sass is telling me a secret about you, Cod-man, so watch it.

Flower: Hey, Trev! Isn't this so cool? We're in a game!

Trevor: Totally.

Flower: Except...why do you still have no pants?

Sass also headed out...and proved to be pretty good at pool.

Sass: I did hear a phrase once... "Talk softly and carry a big stick" and that's a pretty big stick. I approve!

Thor: By Odin's beard why so much mess?! Why is puddle even in room of Jay and Sam?!

Sam: I really don't want to know...

Okay, and on that note, I've reached the image limit, so I think I better wrap this up here...

And yeah, we totally have that hygiene and safety certificate, and can produce it on request, I swear.

Until next time.

[nat-seal-well]

Okay so, first off, I’ve had this The World Ends With You AU in my head for almost a year. And I think it would work really well with the DAMN crew because it’s all about making connections with people, and building friendships, and learning to appreciate the world around you.

If you don’t know what TWEWY is, I don’t judge you. It’s a video game released for the original DS, which means it's old as balls. It’s also my all-time favorite. I may also be getting old. (But they did finally release a sequel two years ago for the Switch!)

I can give you the bare-bones, spoiler-free summary right here: our main guy Neku wakes up in the middle of Shibuya with all of his memories gone. He learns very quickly that he died, and was entered as a Player into the Reapers’ Game: a competition lasting seven days, full of challenges the Players have to complete to avoid being Erased. If they make it through all seven days, their prize is the chance to be sent back to the world of the living.

At first I thought Freelancer would work as Shiki, but Huxley and Damien live in my mind rent-free forever, so I’m shaking things up a bit.

Damien would work really well in Neku’s spot as the protagonist, I think. We love our edgy, angsty, anime boy who wants nothing to do with anyone. Damien isn’t nearly as closed-off as Neku is in the beginning, but I think he would still fit that role pretty well for this AU.

I’m gonna put Huxley in Shiki’s place because I love Shiki with my whole heart. She’s probably my favorite companion character and I like the cat plushie she fights with :)

The only character who could possibly pull off the level of sass and bastard-ness that Joshua has is Gavin.

Lasko and Freelancer would work really well as a duo, I think, and they’d probably take the places of Rhyme and Beat. I love the relationship they have in the canon world and I also want to see them fight together just because I think it’d be cool.

I want Caelum to be Shuto—or Shooter, which is his nickname. I think. It’s been a while since I played this game last. I feel like he would love the Tin Pin Slammer, though. (So do I. I’m awful at it.)

Hanekoma is one of my favorites from TWEWY. I don’t know who would really fit his role but I want it to be Scorpius just because I love him a lot. We can ignore the fact that he hasn’t had any interactions with the DAMN characters in the canon universe.

I think a lot of the d(a)emons would be Reapers. This is partially because I think they would be cool. This is also partially because I want to see them all with Reaper wings.

Vega, however, would be a Game Master. One of the bosses you have to beat at the end of one week of the Reapers’ Game.

Kody would also be a Game Master. This is a little bit bc I’m pretty sure we all want to fight him. (And by that, I mean kick his ass.)

One thing I love about TWEWY is that there’s a lot of NPCs in all the shops and restaurants, and as people you meet in the side quests. And as you interact with them more, you can build a sort of friendship with them. It’s cool. This also means there’s lots of little ways to sneak in characters from over Redacted storylines too :)

[thedreamparadox]

What are your pros and cons of NiD and JoD?

NiD Pros:

Available on Steam and easy to play as a result (especially given that I've seen the game without a manual sell for $100! yikes!)

A-Life system adapts the music to (functionally) how much you accidentally paraloop Nightopians (the game functionally has three tracks for every stage except for Twin Seeds)

Nostalgia

Easy to learn, hard to master gameplay with the link system

Manages to tell a decently coherent story without any words entirely using cutscenes

There are actually hidden things you can find in the free roam sections and it is totally possible (though not easy) to bonk the Alarm Egg to roam more

Saturn version's debug mode turns off the Alarm Egg so you can wander around freely and just vibe (does not work on Steam, requires a Game Shark)

Completely banger soundtrack the entire game through

Pretty much the entire reason that controllers have thumbsticks now

Steam port also has Christmas NiGHTS

Trick ribbons!!!!! Make use of those shoulder buttons (warning: on a lower end pc this will lag your game to hell and back)

NiD Cons:

Completely unintuitive gameplay mechanic required to get the true ending (bonus time REQUIRED and if you don't make use of it your score suffers so much)

The English translation of the story changes and drops details and no one's ever fully translated the jpn manual (some day I will attempt to make progress on my very, very rudimentary attempts at this)

Minimalistic story can be really confusing (more of an issue for younger players who are less used to media that uses little to no spoken dialog aka me at age 7 with no idea what the hell was going on the entire time)

No explanation of gameplay you are dropped into a dreamscape and get mobbed immediately and it is just sheer confusion the whole time if you are going in blind

Steam port's seasonal features don't always work and a bunch of the features from the Christmas sampler (including Sonic Into Dreams) are missing entirely

You really do need the manual to understand a good chunk of what is going on beyond the plot that exists in the cut scenes

JoD Pros:

More accessible to new players, younger players, and people who have no idea how the original worked, or even that it existed. Infinitely more accessible to young gamers than the original

Great soundtrack (the Dream Gate theme is hands down my favorite track in the game)

Voice acting! Reala and Wizeman's put work into making their characters sound intimidating and NiGHTS voice actress exudes sass (within the occasionally clunky script)

The graphics are so good when it comes to the level design

Plot through line with relatable characters and understandable motivations for the kids

Dedicated on foot sections were a neat!

A+ boss design with my only real critiques being Girana's really confusing mustache and Reala's pink nails. Queen Bella for most effective Nightmaren design imo but that's the arachnophobia talking

Motion controls are totally optional and the thumbstick controls work great

On the Wii, which back in the day made it extremely easy for people to play due to how common the console was

Optional collectables have a cool bonus reward (aka being able to play as Claris and Elliot)

JoD Cons:

Owl (specifically his voice clip spam which gets so annoying so quickly)

I really don't enjoy the key chase missions and wish the game let you free roam outside of them more effectively

Bomamba's boss stage tilt table thing

Chamelean's unintuitive boss design

Reala's criminally underutlized in gameplay

Helen and Will not being able to put two and two together about NiGHTS and Reala being related for so long

Some extremely clunky dialog (ie "Go over and touch NiGHTS" which will be memed for all eternity by the fandom)

Character modeling and graphics are off on Owl's feathers and the kids' faces just don't look quite right in some scenes

Issues with plot and pacing (aka pretty much the primary motivating factor to my rewrite's creation in the first place)

The ambiguity of the game's timeline (aka is this a sequel, a prequel, or a soft reboot) but that's a completely personal gripe

My Dream. I LOVE the concept of it and loved playing the same levels repeatedly to try and shift the landscape but its inconsistency of what effected what got added, as well as Nightmaren drawn in by paraloops having to be manually taken out before they eat any Nightopians severely disincentivized paralooping in stages as an enemy removal tactic. That, and the stage never seemed to graduate beyond "grassy flat field" minus the occasional shallow water feature or hill

The ending's focus on the yellow Ideya just vibes so weird to me

Personas were kind of a weird inclusion that I wish the devs would have had a lot more time to utilize

Awakers are weird and I get the three count thing but the Alarm Egg was iconic. Annoying, yes, but iconic, I don't really get its removal.

Despite the wall of cons for JoD, both games are good for their own reasons!

[invisibleanonymousmonsters]

chapter vii – gust & flame

Eris Vanserra x Reader

Eris Vanserra has been a prisoner in his own home since the day he was born. He has done what he had to in order to survive and protect the few he loves. And he is playing the long game. Waiting, waiting, and waiting for the right time to make his move, to usurp his wicked father and become High Lord of Autumn Court. But things become even more complicated when a human girl drops into his life. Perhaps Eris can wait no longer to take his throne.

Word Count: 2,900+

Warnings: torture, abuse, spoilers for entire ACOTAR series

masterlist

When Eris winnowed back to Autumn Court, he felt as though he was going to vomit. To see Y/N reaching out for him – ever so subtly – and then not being able to respond in a manner she deserved…

It felt worse than all of other the terrible, dreadful things Eris had done in his past. 

For hundreds of years, he was able to ignore the guilt and pain of wearing his mask. But as soon as his mate appeared, Eris had never felt like a worse male. 

“General,” a voice stepped out from the shadows of the woods. 

Eris' most trusted sentries knew this was where he would winnow upon his return.  

But Eris now saw the distress in the male's gaze. 

“What is it, Cormac?” He snapped. 

“High Lord Beron…he arrived to the camp unexpectedly.”

Eris swore internally. “When did he arrive?”

“Just an hour ago,” Cormac answered swiftly. “We informed him that you wished to scout an area – and that you requested to do so alone, to not be slowed down.”

Smart. It was just vague and realistic enough that perhaps Beron would buy it. 

Cormac whistled and Eris heard the sound of his hounds sprinting to their master. 

Two horses also came trotting behind the pack of dogs. Yes, Eris could travel faster by winnowing. But to scout an area meant to slowly observe on horseback. His men were trained well in deceiving their High Lord to protect their true master, Eris. 

“We had no idea when to expect you back, so it felt as though it was the only excuse which would bide us time until you returned,” Cormac explained as both of them mounted their horses. 

“You did well, Cormac.” Eris answered, looking at his sentry. “But we both know that it will most likely not be enough.”

And then he dug his heels into his steed and raced back to camp. His hounds followed after their master with a nervous energy. 

It would take a few hours to return to camp. By then, it would be early morning. 

___

Eris immediately recognized his father’s most loyal guards lingering about the camp. Despite Beron’s level of power, he still held a close circle around him at all times, readying for an attack on him that almost never happened.

But there was a part of Eris that felt glee, knowing his father constantly lived in fear. 

Eris jumped off his mount and walked with purpose to where he assumed his father waited for him. 

Beron waited in a newly produced tent. Bigger than Eris’ or any others at the camp. Typical that his father demanded such an unnecessary extravagance for only just visiting. 

As soon as Eris’ entered the tent, Beron turned from the war table he stood in front of. 

Tension immediately filled the room. All the males became quiet and waited for their High Lord reign terror.

“And where have you been lazying about?” Beron growled. 

Eris stood straighter, head slightly bowed, with his hands politely held behind his back. “I thought my men had informed you: I was scouting an area a few miles out.” 

There was no attitude or sass in his response. But even Eris’ most believable lies seemed to infuriate Beron for no reason. It was as though the High Lord hated to fail at finding something in his son worth punishing. 

“Your orders were to insure our armies are ready for battle, shall it arrive at any moment,” Beron hissed. 

“Yes,” Eris responded. “And I had confirmed already that they are.” He cleared his throat. “But my duty is also to protect our borders. And my men reported suspicious activity in the south-east woods.” 

“And?” Beron barked as he stepped into Eris’ space. “Are your sentries so ill-equipped that you do not trust them to manage such duties without you?”

Eris ground his teeth and took in a deep breath. “I thought you would prefer I risk one life over a dozen. We cannot afford to lose our numbers. And seeing as you have many other sons to replace me as heir, I imagined you would not care if my life was lost.” 

The next second, Eris was brought to his knees with a power he could not supersede. Next, a whip of flame wrapped itself around his neck, both choking and burning his flesh. Eris could not help but hiss at the pain. 

“You dare belittle me in front of my own army?” Beron hissed, dipping his face so it was only inches from Eris. 

But the High Lord wasn’t expecting an answer clearly, for Eris was being choked so harshly that not even a sound could escape his throat. 

The soldiers around them shifted their weight and tensed. Some averted their eyes, but others knew better and didn’t break eye contact with the scene before them. 

Everyone in Autumn Court was familiar with these punishments. They were so obviously a message from their High Lord. If he would administer such tortures to his own son, his own heir…everyone else could easily imagine what Beron would do to them. 

“I expect you to follow the orders I give,” Beron continued. “And if I question your actions, you are simply to reply with an apology and an admission to what a useless son you are to me and this court. Am I understood?” 

Eris’ eyes watered with the pain of the flames skewering his neck. 

Most days, he would take the pain and submit to his father. This game was long and felt never ending. But Eris knew the close came with making Beron believe his heir was far too scared to ever even think about usurping him. 

But then Y/N’s face flashed in Eris’ mind... 

She was so strong. He might not know her – not truly. But from the short moments he has spent with her, he knew that she was brave and resilient and stood up for those weaker than herself. She had saved the other women and children who had been captured with her that day in his forest. She had risked her own life to save a child that was not her own. She looked into Eris’ eyes as she told him her family and coven had been taken from her, yet she continued to fight for her own life after everything had been taken from her. 

“Am I understood!?” Beron repeated his question in a shout now. 

And he loosened his whip of flames just enough so that Eris’ could speak. 

“You…made me… the g-general of your armies for a reason,” Eris gasped. “I stand by my decisions.” 

But those were not the words to speak. 

Beron’s eyes flashed with disbelief, but only for a second. Then it was replaced with an evil glint and his lips formed into something resembling a smile. 

“Yes, my armies.” Then Beron’s whip of fire didn’t just wrap his son’s neck, it now wrapped around his entire torso as well, making it impossible for Eris to move at all. 

Beron sneered. “And I believe you need reminding…son.”

–––

Y/N was eating breakfast with Azriel, Cassian, and Nesta when she felt it. 

She had a giant scoop of oatmeal halfway to her mouth when she dropped it and the spoon clattered to the table.

Y/N hissed and both her hands flung to grasp her neck, as if it were burning. 

“Are you alright, Y/N?” Nest rushed out, with a surprising amount of concern. 

“I…don’t know,” Y/N whispered. “Suddenly, I just felt this…this burning.”

But when she pulled her hands away to look down at them, they were not engulfed in flames like she had expected. 

“Something – No – Someone is in pain,” she gasped. 

Y/N was so preoccupied with the feeling, that she missed Nesta and Cassian sharing a knowing look. Azriel shared the same realization as them, but he wasn’t look at them. Instead, his concerned gaze never left Y/N. He was his usual stoic self, but it was clear that his eyes were filled with concern. 

“Y/N?” Nesta asked seriously. 

She was finally distracted from the phantom pain and looked up at the three of them, all sitting across the table from them. 

“I have been wanting to show you something for awhile now,” Nesta continued. Her eyes flicked to Cassian, and he gave her a nod of approval. “A place for people like us…” 

“People like us?” Y/N repeated. 

Nesta nodded, “If I simply showed you, you would understand.” 

“This is where the three of you so frequently go off to?” Y/N asked, still confused and trying to figure out what the phenomenon she just felt was. 

Nesta nodded, also throwing in a forced but sympathetic smile as they all stood from the table.  

Cassian walked alongside his mate.

But Azriel waited for Y/N to follow. His frame was stiff with concern and his shadows seemed to be hovering closer to her than himself. 

It was clear that Y/N's and Eris' bond was abnormally strong. Y/N being human made it even stranger. She seemed to be oblivious to having a mate, yet felt Eris' pain more than any other mates the Inner Circle knew – not even Rhysand and Feyre's.

Y/N’s hand was preoccupied with ghosting over her neck, wondering how those flames could’ve felt so real. 

Had she finally started to go insane? 

Y/N silently followed the two Illyrians and Nesta up a set of stairs. 

It wasn’t until the wind greeted Y/N so kindly that she finally looked around to where she had been taken. 

There were female fae – some High Fae, some not – standing and sitting around stretching. As soon as they glanced at Cassian and Azriel, some perked up, tightening their posture. Others stopped conversation completely. 

Two of them, one with bright red hair and the other with dark skin, waved brightly at Nesta, who lingered at Y/N’s side. 

“Valkyries,” Nesta explained to her in a quiet voice. 

“I-I-I don't know what the means?” Y/N asked.  

“A group of female warriors who became extinct 500 years ago during the War,” Nesta explained darkly. 

“Extinct?” Y/N repeated. “Then what am I looking at?” 

“A resurrection of the females who came before us,” Nesta shrugged. Then she fully faced Y/N and smirked. “Ask your wind, why don’t you?”

Y/N glared at her, but still did as she suggested. Closing her eyes, the wind answered all her unasked questions. “These females,” Y/N murmured swiftly, “have suffered…greatly. They are here to remember their strength, their courage.”

Y/N’s eyes fluttered open. “You wish for me to train with you?”

Nesta smirked, nothing but genuine now. “Yes. Cassian said your coven used to.”

Y/N’s jaw dropped and she looked at the female fae warming up now. “Yes, b-b-but nothing like this.” 

Nesta gripped her shoulder with one hand encouragingly. “You saved my nephew, Y/N. Therefore, I know there is strength inside you…same as us all.” 

“But I am just…a...a mortal,” Y/N quickly reminded her. 

Nesta’s eyes narrowed and she crossed her arms. “Feyre was just a mortal when she broke a 50-year curse that no other fae could destroy.” 

Y/N had no rebuttal to that. She had heard the story of Feyre's journey from mortal savior to High Lady fae. It seemed something of legends and it left Y/N in awe that she had befriended the hero such a story.

“Just watch today, if that makes you more comfortable,” Nesta shrugged. “But you have just as much of a right to be here as any fae.” 

And Y/N did just that. 

She found the wall right at the entrance of the training ring and leaned against it. Eventually, she slid down and sat, watching the training drills closely. 

She noticed how Cassian and Azriel were patient, but stern with their training. The females did not fear them, but admired and respected the two Illyrians. 

It wasn’t until they broke off into groups and a handful of females grabbed bows that Y/N perked up. 

The wind snatched at her face, urging her to stand. 

Y/N did so, on shaky legs. 

Aware of the other groups doing different drills, she moved silently until she joined those practicing archery. 

Azriel was giving a loose lesson of how to handle the bow as he eyed Y/N’s silent entrance. He made eye contact, but didn’t stop his talking. When he was finished, he tilted his head slightly and looked at Y/N almost with suspicion. 

“Care to try?” Azriel asked Y/N, offering her the bow. 

Y/N eyed it a moment before confidently taking it from the Illyrian’s grasp. 

Then, in one fell swoop, Y/N had snatched up an arrow, raised the bow, and fired it off. 

The small group gasped, impressed to see that Y/N’s arrow had landed perfectly in the center of the target. 

Y/N turned to see that Nesta and Cassian had paused their training to watch as well. Cassian had a proud smirk on his lips. Nesta was smiling brighter than Y/N had ever seen in the short time she’d known her. 

When Y/N turned back to the group, she found Azriel watching her with amusement, but also silently questioning her hidden skill. 

Y/N bowed her head, suddenly remembering why she had this skill at all. “My mother used to say a woman’s greatest strength was knowing how to attack from the shadows.” 

Azriel realized it made sense. If Y/N grew up in a coven, always on the run, they did not have the strength to fight the evil men who so often hunted them. If they could safely defend themselves at a distance, archery was their best bet. 

“And the wind?” Azriel asked, once the other females had started practicing. 

Y/N smirked. “My shots are more powerful. And I rarely ever miss.”

“You have quite the friend and ally on your side,” Azriel hummed as he crossed his arms to observe the Valkyrie pupils. 

“I asked the House for a bow and arrow, but she wouldn’t give me them,” Y/N mumbled, remembering how she begged the sentient home for a weapon those first days here. 

“Perhaps she worried you would be a threat to us all,” Azriel teased. 

After the archery, Y/N joined the rest of the training. Despite her earlier concerns, none the drills were something that a human couldn’t also execute. And Nesta was right to believe that her past training with her coven gave her somewhat of an advantage. 

The other females were kind and treated Y/N as an equal, not seeming to be deterred at all by the fact that she was a mortal. Y/N assumed they would find out sooner rather than later that she was also a witch. But for some reason, she didn’t think that would deter them either. 

After training, Y/N spoke with the two that had greeted Nesta so brightly: Gwyn and Emerie. Y/N had noticed the latter’s wings immediately. But it didn’t take long for her to also see that they didn’t seem to be functional in the same way that Azriel's and Cassian’s were. 

Through casual conversation during their post-training stretching, Emerie had mentioned owning her own clothier ship in Windhaven.

And it had sparked an idea for Y/N. 

_____

Eris could hardly winnow back to the Forest House he was weak. 

This was not the worst beating he had received from his father. But it had not reached this level of violence in quite some time. 

Beron was stressed, that much was clear. And he would continue to take it out on those closest to him until he got what he wanted. 

Eris already had a steaming bath waiting for him in his personal quarters, a small miracle that his servants had provided him. 

With a snap of his fingers, he had lit the dozens of candles that surrounded the drop-in tub that could fit a small family. 

Some of his injuries would fully heal. Others, were so harrowing that Eris knew they would scar. It wouldn’t be the first time that his father left a permeant mark on his body – and it wouldn’t be the last. 

Eris had only been soaking in the tub for 10 minutes when he heard the spark of magic right next to his face. 

A note. 

Without even looking at it, Eris knew it was from Rhysand. No one else dared communicate with him in such a way. 

Eris’ nostrils flared as he reached for the letter. 

Even this small movement shot pain through his entire body. 

Not that I truly care, but Y/N felt something today. I assume it was your pain. If forcing you to stay for dinner exposed you in any way…that I am sorry for. 

Eris frowned at the words. Y/N had felt his pain? Cauldron. He hoped it was just a slight echo of his sensations, nothing like what he felt when she and Nyx had been attacked. 

But if his pain became her pain…Eris would find some way – any way – to sever their bond. Anything to keep her away from his own suffering. 

That was why Eris surprised himself by producing a quill from nothing and writing a response on the back of the note. 

Is she alright? Has she been hurt because of it?

There was no use in hiding that he had been tortured. Eris was well aware that Rhysand and his inner circle had all made the correct assumptions about the abuse Beron executed in his court. Most High Lords knew to a degree – some even witnessed it for themselves. 

All that mattered was that Y/N had not also been hurt because of him. 

Rhysand’s response was swift: 

Azriel and Cassian said she felt it at breakfast. I believe she was mostly scared and confused. But she is fine. No injuries sustained. 

Eris didn’t respond. What more was there to say? 

–––––––

Hopefully people are still engaged and caring about this fic. I know it's slow and steady. But I hope you'll find it worth it in the end.

What do you think Y/N's idea was after talking to Emerie?

How do you feel about Y/N training with the Valkyries?

chapter viii

[herehavesomeheadcanons]

Seraph of the End x reader headcanons, but it’s only the characters that I think deserve more attention

Ferid Bathory

🤍♦️ Does Ferid already get a lot of attention? Yes. But I like him so of course I think he deserves more attention. I’ve got two words necessary for your survival with this bastard: Entertain Him.

🤍♦️ Your best bet for surviving is to try and match his energy. Try to out-perv him, if you will. Most humans are absolutely scared shitless at the mere sight of him, so if you sass him back he’s sure to take an interest. But is that really such a good idea?

🤍♦️ Ferid gets bored easily, and if he gets bored of you he’ll likely kill you. I’m sorry if you’re just here for sugar-coated fluff, but that’s the way he is. Maybe you should have picked Yuu instead. Like I said, if you catch his attention you’re going to have to work hard to survive.

🤍♦️ Yes, he will spoil you. Money is irrelevant during a literal fucking apocalypse, and he has like 5 mansions or something stupid. 

🤍♦️ Also yes, he will keep you as a pet. Probably not the best situation, but it’s better than dying of the plague. At least you have a nice place to live where you don’t need to worry about being brutally murdered by the giant monsters roaming the planet.

🤍♦️ Yes, the collar is necessary. He needs to make sure you won’t run off on him. If you’re not careful, he’ll have to get a leash to go with it~ 🤍♦️ Yes he is going to drink your blood. It’s a damn good thing being bitten by a vampire feels good in this world, because he is going to drink A LOT of your blood. And there is nothing you can do about it.

🤍♦️ He does take good care of you, not to worry. He needs to keep you in good health, otherwise him drinking your blood might kill you! He will provide plenty of good food.

🤍♦️ He would love for you to play with his hair and tell him how pretty he is! He knows he’s drop-dead gorgeous, but he’d still like to hear it from his favorite little pet~!

🤍♦️ Physical affection is a MUST. This fucker is SO DAMN HANDSY. Always wants to be touching you in some way. There is no avoiding it. He’s going to drape himself over you, grab you from behind, kiss you without warning, nibble your neck, and randomly pick you up. Definitely a biter as well, and he loves to leave marks.

🤍♦️ He will acquire (can’t really say ‘buy’, since money is irrelevant) fancy clothes for you. Yes, you are required to put them on for him. He loves to play dress-up with you! You might be able to persuade him to try on clothing of your choosing, but it will take a lot of sucking up to him. Speaking of which…

🤍♦️ Definitely suck up to him. He loves it. He’ll probably force you to call him “lord Ferid” or “master Ferid” or something along those lines.

🤍♦️ Going in the complete opposite direction, he also finds it amusing when you back-sass him. It might result in punishment, depending on his mood, but you’re probably into that shit if you’re here for him anyway. Sass battles will ensue, and might lead to some less-than-holy actions.

🤍♦️ I like to think that he would enjoy being introduced to human games. Show him some Minecraft or another videogame. Play board games with him. He’s definitely amazing at Cards Against Humanity. He wins every damn time because he’s just that funny. He would probably enjoy DnD, but he’s definitely one of the WORST players to DM.

🤍♦️ Playing with Ferid is a dangerous game, but it’s worth it if you can handle his ‘eccentricities.’ He’s certainly fun to be around, that’s for sure! Just be very careful with what you say to him. Do not suggest an ‘action’ if you are not 100% willing to perform said ‘action.’  As much as I love this unapologetic bastard, I’d have to say he is the most dangerous pick on this list.

Lacus Welt

💜✨ Another of my favorite boys! And another dangerous one. Lacus is really only here for the pleasure, so that’s what you have to offer him to get close to him.

💜✨ This little shit is 100% down to keep a pet human. Mostly as food, but if you offer him other pleasures he likely won’t decline.  💜✨ Lacus has been known to accidentally kill his victims because he just doesn’t. Stop. Drinking. It feels good to him, and he just doesn’t want to stop. You’re going to have to remind him that if he keeps drinking, you’re literally going to die.

💜✨ Honestly, he’s like a toned-down Ferid. He likely won’t think of anything too awful on his own, so just make sure you don’t give him suggestions. By that i mean, don’t joke about him getting you a collar. He’ll think that’s a FANTASTIC idea.

💜✨ Actually gets super into physical affection when you start giving it to him. Very touchy, though not as bad as Ferid. He also wants ALL of your attention. He also likes to bite. Like, a lot.

💜✨ Yeah he’s also going to force you to address him as “master Lacus”. You’re his pet, after all. 

💜✨ Rene is 100% of his logical reasoning AND impulse control. If it’s just you and Lacus, which it usually is, he’s going to say and do some pretty stupid things. (”haha those idiot humans thought we were saving them! We were just protecting our property.” “Master Lacus, that’s the same fucking thing-”)

💜✨ He’s a little stupid, but he’s got the spirit. Will ask you weird questions. There’s no avoiding his curiosity.

💜✨ He’ll likely offer to share you with Rene (they’re best bros after all-), who will casually decline. Rene’s emo ass just isn’t as into the whole ‘pet’ thing as Lacus is.

💜✨ All in all: scary, but not as bad as Mr. Thirsty Whore Ferid. Once he actually takes a genuine liking to you, he can be a real sweetheart. You just gotta get through his thick skull!

Rene Simm

🖤♦️ One word: TSUNDERE.

🖤♦️ I genuinely don’t know how the fuck you managed to get his attention, but good job. Unfortunately for you, he will NOT show his feelings. He’s a vampire, he should be above such things.

🖤♦️ Honestly? Just fucking throw yourself at him. If you’re lucky, Lacus will convince him to take you in. Lacus knows Rene better than anyone, and can probably tell that he actually wants you. Lacus has your back, don’t worry. He’ll be your wingman.

🖤♦️ Rene will mostly leave you to yourself, unless he’s feeling peckish. Then he might come bother you for some blood.

🖤♦️ He really isn’t clingy or needy. Like, at all. He’s not one to initiate physical affection either. You’re going to have to do all the work.

🖤♦️ He wouldn’t mind having you climb on his lap and play with his hair, it’s just not high on his priorities list.

🖤♦️ Don’t worry, he will keep you well fed and cared for. He’ll also keep Lacus’s thirsty ass off you. He knows how Lacus can be, and he doesn’t want you to end up dead.

🖤♦️ I feel like he’d be the type to watch you sleep. Dunno why, I just think he’d like watching your peaceful resting face. 

🖤♦️ Rene is a pretty great pick, if you can get through his Tsundere shell. It’s difficult, but not impossible. Just be patient with him.

Urd Geales

Snagged this image off pinterest cause i was too lazy to get my own screenshot-

💡Gonna be honest, Urd is the best pick on the list if you can get to him. Unfortunately, he’s also the hardest to get at.

💡This guy has more braincells than his entire species combined. He actually functionally runs his country, and his people are happy. He does his fucking job like a responsible leader.

💡 Anyway, he’s also a big rule follower. Remember how vampires are not allowed to drink directly from a human? Yeah. Good luck getting him to be your sugar daddy. I can really only see him getting with a vampire s/o.

💡If you approach him, he’ll likely carry out a short, polite conversation with you. He is a busy man, though. He has to ACTUALLY RUN HIS COUNTRY LIKE A LEADER IS SUPPOSED TO- *ahem* anyways…

💡It’s gonna take a whole heck of a lot of time to get him to fall for you. Not only that, he can definitely tell when you like him. He’s not stupid like Lacus, he can tell when you’re flirting.

💡He’s definitely a gentleman. He won’t touch you without permission, and would never insult you.  💡 He likes to just… talk. Just carry on an intelligent conversation with him and he’ll at least take a little liking to you. If he goes out of his way to talk with you, you’ve already won. Congrats!

💡 If you get him to open up about his past and the whole Rigr Stafford thing, you’re a miracle worker. And you’ve got him in the palm of your hand.

💡He’ll bring you simple, elegant gifts. Nothing too fancy or extravagant, but definitely practical. I could see him getting you a nice wristwatch, or a fluffy coat (it’s fuckin COLD in Russia-).

💡 Not one for PDA, or physical affection. His love language is acts of service. You best bet he makes some excellent breakfast. And he knows how to make a house spotless. WHERE he found the time to do all this you have no clue—but hey. Who cares?

💡He can be very romantic when he chooses. And incredibly classy. Red roses, candles, classical music, the whole shebang.

💡 Overall, definitely the hardest to get with. But hey, nothing worth anything comes easy! (Sorry Ferid and Lacus!)

Ky Luc

Found this image on pinterest and it was too cute not to use- lookit his lil face-

🔹🤎 Well well well… what do we have here? Another diluted Ferid! Like with Pretty Bastard Man, you gotta entertain him.

🔹🤎 Got a funky or non-conventional personality? Perfect! Spout that tumblr nonsense, he’ll love it! Anything that makes him giggle is sure to pique his interest in you.

🔹🤎 Ky isn’t quite as off-the-deep-end as Ferid is, which is good for you. He’s still one of the eccentrics though, don’t forget that. You’re only alive because he finds you amusing.

🔹🤎 This guy is WHIP smart. Don’t let his wide-eyed, elevator-music-on-the-brain smile fool you. He’s easily as smart as Ferid, and almost as smart as Urd. He will know when you catch feelings for him. And he will use said feelings to torment you for his own amusement.

🔹🤎 Yes. He is a tease. He can’t help it! Your reactions are so cute! This little shit loves making you blush and whine. He’ll poke you, pull your hair, trip you, push you around, and generally fuck with you. He’s definitely one to slam you against a wall and act all sexy just to make you squirm. Then he’ll just laugh about it.

🔹🤎 He’ll definitely entertain your feelings for a little bit. He’s curious to see what happens in a ‘relationship.’ He’s curious about a lot of things. Get ready for some uncomfortable questions. It’ll be a while before he realizes that he genuinely likes you and wants to keep you around.

🔹🤎 Thankfully, despite his bastardous energy, he is a rule follower. No need to worry about him drinking you dry.

🔹🤎 Not super into physical affection, but definitely curious about it. There isn’t much he’s not willing to try. He’ll hold your hand and let you cuddle up against him if you like. There is one thing he especially loves, which is…

🔹🤎 Coming home to find you wearing his clothes. He thinks it’s just the cutest thing! When he walks in to see you bundled up in one of his coats, it’s almost like his dead heart starts beating again! Especially if you tell him it’s because it smelled like him!

🔹🤎 Still a horrible tease though. Heck, it actually gets WORSE after he realizes he has feelings for you. Hope you like being constantly pestered, cause that’s what’s going to happen.

🔹🤎 All in all, not a bad choice. Not the best, but far from the worst. Good for someone who enjoys Ferid’s energy, but could do without the sadism.

[eddiemsbitch]

Eddie meets the parents, that’s all.

Fucking love it.

Dinner and some cuddling ;) - Eddie x reader

Summary: you had been with Eddie for a month or two now, only now taking it upon yourself to introduce him to your parents

warnings: None :) just pure fluff baby

Growing up you were never social, and going into high school just made it so much worse, but after your younger brother had told your mom during dinner about you being in a relationship she stopped worrying about your social life so much. Since that you made sure to keep your voice very low whenever you talked to the secret lover boy. Holly, your youngest sister, flopped on your bed looking at you smiling "So, tell me about your date" She smiled resting a hand on her cheek smiling at you "Well...We went to his house...and..watched scary movies while he taught me about the game he plays" You explained picking up your six year old sister "Why won't you tell sissy who it is?" she asked tilting her head almost like she was reciting a script, you laughed shaking your head "Did Nancy put you up to this?" You asked scurrying her off back to her room as you walked down the stairs smiling at your parents "Can I go see my boyfriend? I wanna invite him to dinner if that's okay?" You asked holding onto the doorknob smiling towards your dad knowing if you tried hard enough he'd fold "You can't call him?" Karen, your mother asked, turning around on the couch smiling "You're really gonna let us meet this mysterious guy?" She asked excitedly "Took long enough" Ted, your father commented "Fine" You pouted going to the landline dialing Eddie's number patiently waiting for somebody to answer "Munson resident, this is Wayne" Eddie's uncle's voice came through the phone after a moment of silence "Hi Wayne, It's Y/n Wheeler..Is Eddie there?" You asked picking at your nails "Hey sweetheart, Yea hold on one moment and I'll get him on" He replied before you heard him set down the phone and go to find Eddie. "Can I help you?" Eddie's harsh tone rang through the phone "What is so important you had to bother your dungeon master, Wheeler?" He sassed making you giggle "Okay, big guy..wrong Wheeler" You said through your giggles "Oh shit, I-I'm sorry baby, that was embarrassing" He muttered "What's up?" He asked after a moment "It was cute..but..I called to ask if you wanted to come over for dinner..meet my parents as my boyfriend not my little brother's much older friend?" You offered nervously, Now Mike didn't hear the full conversation, but once he heard little brother and much older friend he immedietly ran to Nancy "I think y/n's dating Steve!" He whisper yelled.

As you hung up the phone you walked into the kitchen smiling "He said he will be here, just..promise to protect me from Mike?" You asked looking towards your parents, they looked at each other then you confused as hell before nodding unsure. You sat hiding in the living room until you heard a loud knock, you heard your siblings start to race downstairs, Nancy yelling if it was who she thought it was she'd kill you. As you got to the door you blocked it from your brother and sister's grabby hands "Back up! He doesn't need you to scare him" You said crossing your arms before you started to open the door "Steve!" Nancy yelled, only to be met with Eddie giving her a bitch face "Eddie!?" Mike yelled looking at him then you then back to him as your boyfriend walked into the house smiling. Eddie was wearing the nicest clothes he owned, his hair brushed and pulled back out of his face "Mr, Mrs. Wheeler" Eddie smiled looking at them nervously ignoring your siblings for now "Eddie....It's..nice..to see you again" Karen said before looking at you mouthing 'can I speak with you' before leaving to the kitchen, you frowned following her in looking at her "Do..do you not like him..?" You asked nervously, your face falling into a natural pout "Well...I haven't really heard good things about him, Y/n..I'm just worried about my little girl" She explained starting to grab the bowls of sides "Mom..Eddie has been nothing but a gentleman to me since I met him..you've seen how he protects Mike, Dustin, and Lucas..He's a big softie who always get the crap end of the stick" You said looking at her huffing as you grabbed the pan of lasagna helping your mom carry the food out, Nancy was helping Holly into her seat while your dad sat at the table "Where's Mike and Eddie?" You asked looking at the three "They went upstairs for a second" Nancy said her demeanor changing after finding out you weren't dating her ex/crush.

Mike paced his room looking at his friend "Is this some sort of payback because we got Erica to play with us last night? like any girl ever! and you pick my sister!?" He yelled looking at Eddie in shock "seriously Wheeler? You think I'm like that? For the record I've been with your sister for two months now, we've been hooking up since I met you, kid" Eddie said leaving the room and back downstairs to eat "There you are..I got worried" You whispered walking up to him flattening out his vest and jacket, he chuckled looking at you holding your sides gently "Worried about little ole me?" Eddie teased smiling sitting down next to you at the table watching your family say grace before starting to eat. You could feel the glances from your parents and brother as you ate, you held one arm under the table holding Eddie's hand tightly, resting them both on his leg to keep it from bouncing and hitting the table. "So. Eddie, what do you do for work?" Ted asked raising an eyebrow towards your boyfriend, You squeezed his hand smiling "I-I'm working on my music c-career, sir, I have a band, I play lead guitarist" He replied gulping as your dad nodded "What're you planning on doing after school?" Your mom butted in, Eddie shrunk a bit, school was a sensitive topic for him and anybody who knew him knew that. "I hope..I hope to get into college for musical arts" He said setting his fork down to try and hide his nervousness "I can respect a man who follows what he wants" Your dad said smiling towards him, Eddie chuckled smiling at your dad then you "Do you still plan on playing the one demonic game, I read that it'll make you confused with game and reality?" You mother asked, you could see Eddie's eye twitch wanting to yell about how it was fake news and just bullshit media but he took a deep breath smiling "W-With all due respect Mrs. Wheeler, Dungeons and Dragons is nothing more than that, just a game, no demonic summoning or real life murder, I would never let either one of your children get involved with that" Eddie said looking at you then Mike as he explained, you smiled at him kissing his cheek as a sign of support.

Dinner went smoothly after that, a couple questions here and there about where Eddie stays and when he'll get his own place "Can I stay with Eddie tonight..Please?" You whispered to your mom while she was washing the dishes from dinner "I suppose..but no funny business. I'm serious, Y/n.." She warned before you rushed outside to Eddie's van before he could leave "Woah! What're you doin, crazy ass I could've hit you!" Eddie laughed looking at you as you climbed into his passenger seat "I wanna stay with you.." You smiled kissing him softly before he pulled out into the road "You did awesome tonight..I think they finally see you as a respectable person" You explained pulling away from his lips watching him pout playfully "They didn't before?" He asked teasingly as he drove towards his trailer "Seriously..and seeing you dress up nice for them..and watching you play with Holly...it was really cute..and it means alot to me" You smiled leaning against him carefully so he'd still be able to drive.

Whenever you got back to Eddie's trailer you went straight to his room pulling off your dress "Babbby! I need clothes!" You shouted, knowing Wayne had to of already left for work by now, Eddie rushed in taking in your half naked state, he smiled going to his dresser pulling out a pair of his sweatpants handing them to you "M'lady" He whispered "I need a shirt..what if I'm still sleeping when your uncle gets back?" You asked grabbing his hands loosely "Well...good thing..I'm not using this one" Eddie smiled pulling off his coat and vest before pulling off his hellfire t-shirt that was worn backwards "I had no clean white shirts.." He defended watching you flip the shirt around pulling it on over your head, then pulling on the pants "Do you need anything before we lay down?" He asked crawling into his bed hovering over you as he pecked your lips, rolling over next to you Eddie pulled the covers over you "I think I'm good..just want you to lay with me" You smiled feeling his bare chest press against your back "I love you y/n/n.." He whispered kissing your forehead "And I'm gonna bring you all the way to the top with me" Eddie added on, chuckling to himself whenever he realized he was talking to somebody who was already asleep, cuddling his arm that was wrapped around their waist.

[mchlgayser]

BEST FRIEND!

starring: jobe belingham x male!reader

warning/author's note: this is a kuroo-and-kenma-friendship likes, very moody and un-energetic reader 😞😞 y'all might find him annoying, mention of crushing at each other but not being together AT LEAST not here loll jobe being annoyingly lousy 24/7. this might be a fluff but might not mehhh not proofread

extra note: when i tell you i'm new here, i mean it and how to do you make a master list, like the link ☠️☠️ someone sends help!!!!!!!!!!!!!! idk if it's okay for me to do this fanfic with male reader osso kinda scare to post it but I did anw 😭 anything just hit me up if you wanted to say anything

song suggestion: always forever by cults

The doorbell rang continuously waking you up from your short nap, you stood up from shock at the constant loud noise and decided to get up to answer the door, your feet are still weak and groggy from the previous sleep as you tried to steadily walk to the door. You peeked from the door eye seeing a certain someone on the porch of your house, he had a puffer jacket on and a black scarf over his neck. Opening the door you lean against the frame 'What's up?' Jobe greeted you back 'You slept?' You hum moving your structure aside to let him in 'Fell asleep playing games.' He took off his jacket to hang it and you closed the door behind him

'What're you doing here? Aren't't you supposed to be at training?' You crashed one brow up at him, he chuckle 'Nah, we got morning practice though... Anyway what you playing?' He asked getting comfortable on the couch and taking one of the controllers 'Fifa game' You slumped beside him and sighed 'You wanted to play? I got like study after this, so only two matches.' He shrug his shoulder at you and you both began playing.

Jobe constantly hit you with a pillow every time you scored and laugh when you look at him with offended looks, 'That was offside bro!' You complained hitting your head with the controller and he laughs again 'It was just a bloody game bro, don't get so serious!' He wheezes at you making you shot him a look

The game goes on with Jobe being extra annoying than usual, hugging your side every time he won against you and shaking your body left and rights 'Bro let go!' You yelled at him pushing him off hastily. The game ended, now both you and Jobe ended up in your room, him laying on your bed playing with his phone probably for more games and you doing some quick revision before joining him

You felt a statue tower over your figure, head up to see Jobe leaning in on you with one arm over the chair and the other on the table caging you 'Need help?' You feel your cheek growing warmer 'What...' He let a confused hum and eyes turning over your works to your eyes 'What, what?'

'What... The fuck are you doing?' You almost let a sigh of relief when he jumped away from you and a loud realization 'Oh' escaped his mouth, you were thankful you regained your composure almost immediately and huffed 'Sorry, that must make you uncomfortable!' He apologized 'I'm not homophobic Jobe...' You stated in a matter-of-fact manner

He scratched the back of his un-itch neck and awkwardly chuckle 'Right, I'm just saying...' You shake your head at him 'Don't you wanna go home or something? It's eight, we got school tomorrow.' He sighed plopping on your bed 'I'm so lazy!' He whined 'Can I sleep at your shit today?'

'Nah.'

You sassed rolling your eyes at him 'Go home Jobs' He groaned, he hated when you called him that, you always tell him back in the day how his name was similar to 'Jobs' and ever since you loved calling him that 'Right, going now.' He stopped his pace at your door 'Not gonna fetch me?'

'Fuck off.' Anyhow you still go after him to send him home, 'See ya alligaytor' Showing him a middle finger, he laughs leaving your residence and you close the door. The door closed and you went straight to your room plopping straight on your bed, the exact moment your head hit the pillow your nostrils hit with a strong fragrance of Jobe's. The smell of his minty hair and his CK cologne all over your bed. You flush, head repeating the scene from this evening, his figure inching yours. You fell asleep thinking about him.

Jobe returned from your place seeing both his mom and dad at the living room watching television, he greeted them and went straight to bed to sleep early, he jumped on his bed with a low groan getting pleased, he was staring outside his window watching the moon shone sharing her ardency. The moon. It reminded him of you. He likes to equate you with the moon as it always reminded him of your calm, collected but somehow opaque personas.

He remember the scene from this evening at your house, how could he get so clingy at you? Perhaps it's because he already realized his feelings for you. Him hugging you now felt different, but in a good, good way. He inches over your formation with his arms almost looking like he's capturing you in his arms. He loves that feeling. He craves for it.

He can't wait to see you tomorrow, so excited to see you!

[s1st3r]

Soo... how would the Bad Batch react to a S/O that has a very snarky/dry sense of humor? Just always cracking jokes and finding humor in everything? (Love ur content btw <3)

Thank you for your request!!! And THANK YOU IM GLAD U LIKEY!!!!

Ok I have seen this but knew it would take me hours to write so I was waiting for the write moment! (get it? write = right? teehee) talk about a terribly dry sense of humour my goodness.

How Would The Bad Batch React to a Snarky/Witty/Dry Sense of Humour Significant Other (s/o)

Factz: Not even kidding, I feel like the boys would kill for a hella sassy partner in crime.

Hunter

Oh my gosh they are literally best friends!!! They speak in a very similar style to each other.

Hunter expects a little bit of snark from Cross, sarcasm from Echo, and quips from Tech, but when his s/o just dishes his dry humour right back at him the first time they meet, he's like "Why was that so... hot???"

So from then on, most of the dialogue exchanged between the two of them are like super sassy comments and witty replies, until it unintentionally gradually morphs into really heavy flirting. They get so into teasing each other, the whole batch can feel the tension in the air.

Of course both are oblivious of this for the longest time.

But when eventually they do figure it out and get together, the whole batch sigh in relief thinking "finally this intense pining is over"... But it actually just gets worse?

So now during missions, the two of you verbally dance around each other like you're in some comeback war.

In the middle of a serious mission:

Hunter: "I need you here now!"

S/O: "wow wow Hunter. babe. cool your jets. i know we haven't really done it in a while but we're in the middle of a mission and-"

Hunter: "As much as I love how you think mesh'la, I think you're misreading the situation."

His s/o also keeps ruining his *tough guy* persona. During briefs, his s/o keeps making him crack his skillfully honed poker face.

The teasing through dry humour is just a really fun and goofy way to connect to each other and is their common ground of affection.

Tech

We all know Tech is a witty boi, and man do we love him for it!

Tech finds his s/o's attitude quite entertaining.

He does like it when they use their snarkiness to defend him from people that give him a hard time, but he like his s/o's humour best when it's just the two of them having fun.

I feel like Tech would find it 10x funnier if his s/o was also really smart and able to understand his technical language, because they just pass these really witty/funny quips back and forth to each other that are actually hilarious but no one understands. It's like their own hidden language.

Now we've seen Tech smile and m a y b e chuckle a little before?? But so far, we've yet to see Tech actually laugh and I headcanon that Tech snorts when he laughs. (Has anybody seen the live action TMNT?? Kinda like how Donnie laughs in those). So ohmiGOSH it's so WhOlEsOmE when his s/o makes Tech laugh!! He's so CUTE!

The rest of the batch will be out getting supplies while Echo works of the exterior hull of the ship and Tech and his s/o fix up the systems inside.

Tech laying under a panel: "Hm, this wire seems to be adhered to a far less efficient arrangement." Tech's s/o wordlessly shuffles over from their panel to analyse the problem. Their shoulders touch as they lie side by side.

S/o: "Mm, I think you're right, but see here? It looks like it's been manually transfigured. Probably by Echo in one of our many quick fixes. It looks like he's done it so he can easily access and program the flight module."

Tech: "I'm going to rewire it to-"

S/o: "To that one right?" His s/o says, suppressing a smile as they point to clearly the wrong wiring. Tech's eyes narrow and his brow furrows.

Tech: "Of course not! That would compromise the-" He catches a glimpse of his s/o's cheeky grin, "oh you're joking." His s/o bursts out laughing and he can't help the smile that stretches over his face as he shakes his head.

By the end of the repairs, the batch come back to find you both practically rolling on the ground in snorting fits of laughter.

Their humour paired with their competence makes them super attractive to him.

Wrecker

Wrecker finds his s/o's dry humour the funniest thing in the galaxy. He is one of those blessings that will always laugh at your jokes.

Which is a relief cuz I have dry humour and almost no one ever laughs at my jokes rip.

I mean, you guys saw how he reacted in ep 1 when Omega DeStRoYeD those regs in the mess hall. He was so proud and supportive of her.

So yeah he's pretty much his s/o's hype man.

He loves that his s/o's humour means that they quite enjoy playful competition and games. So they're always playing random games together, even going so far as to arm wrestle (S/o: "But we both already know who's going to win... Me. Obviously.")

And sometimes he will let his s/o win, just because he thinks it's so cute when they start flexing their arms and boasting about how strong and amazing they are.

He knows they're joking. He knows they know he let them win. But even though they've never really beaten him, he still thinks they're strong and amazing.

There is always friendly banter between the two but what Wrecker loves the most is how easy his s/o makes things for him.

He's not a natural at romance, and often finds himself making mistakes or he might do something a little awkwardly. But instead of being mad, disappointed, or judgmental, his s/o just smiles or laughs it off and walks him through things.

He feels like he can always be himself around his s/o.

Crosshair

Again, it's canon and fanon that Cross is a bit of a grumpy pants so he obviously finds his s/o's wit irritating at first. Which his s/o finds annoying, so his s/o just does it more just to get under his skin.

Totally enemies to lovers trope. I see it no other way. FiGhT me.

His s/o would make jokes all the time but I see that one day, his s/o makes a dry joke and he gives them crap for it, and they've just had enough and so they absolutely *slam* him with snark, sass, and wit that cannot be rivalled by Crosshair himself. They get right up into his face; tension as thick as s o u p.

And then he just grabs their face and makes out with them.

His s/o's like "ok" and totally rolls with it.

The Bad Batch wonder why they don't fight as much anymore (not that they're complaining).

Now they both use their sass to bully the regs.

They kinda become this unbeatable pair of unrivalled attitude. Unlike Hunter and his s/o who use it to tease each other, while Cross and his s/o do that a little too, they mostly direct their humour and sarcasm outward. Cross's s/o is a little more good natured than him though and will pull him in when he goes a bit too far.

He generally finds his s/o's humour quite funny now (though he'll never admit it), and the fact that he smiles a little more doesn't go unnoticed by his brothers.

Echo

Ok while Hunter is master of the dry humour, Echo is KING of sarcasm.

Having said that, I feel like Echo would actually far more appreciate light humour over sass/snark/wit/etc.

I think after being through the crap he's been through, echo baby just needs a light hearted, positive beam of sunshine in his life and his s/o is it.

He loves that his s/o always has a way of making others laugh and smile, even on really hard missions and in rough times.

I think his s/o having a lighter humour also makes him feel safer. Like there's no chance of miscommunication whereby this s/o accidently hits a sensitive topic. His s/o sticks to surface level humour which makes it easy to digest.

They are also absolutely fantastic at telling funny stories which is a real treat when his s/o will retell stories about some of the missions the Bad Batch has done and they just execute the story perfectly.

Echo is in love with his s/o's laugh and thinks it's so cute when they giggle at their own jokes.

He'll never say it, but his s/o's humour sometimes reminds Echo of Fives and Cutup, which is a bit bittersweet for him.

They say that "a joyful heart is good medicine" and for Echo that couldn't be more true. His s/o's joyful heart and nature revive and heal him. He is so much happier because of them and will tell them so in between little kisses as his s/o giggles playfully at his gentle yet eager ministrations.

~ Sister

Tag list: @damerondala @imalovernotahater

@kaorikoizumi @xlittlemissydjx @in-the-crosshairs @dionysuskid21

@littlemisscare-all

[love-toxin]

Hi! I’ve been reading a bunch about your new batch of oc’s (it’s really cool how they’re all super distinct from each other—that’s pretty hard to pull off, but you do it so well!) I was wondering (only if it’s ok!) to ask/req about how your new batch would react to a mouthy/sassy s/o who’s really not interested in a relationship? Thank you for your time and have a wonderful day!

merci!! ;w;

Leo

"I love you too much to let you push me around."

he may be domesticated, but there's no way he'll let your mouth run him away. he hates how much your laughter pisses him off in this moment, how it reminds him that you don't take him seriously enough to even consider his confession. nobody else makes him so crazy, so angry, so needy like the dog he's accepted that he is. you can barely collect yourself, and it's humiliating. it's all he can do to keep himself from baring his teeth and sink them into your neck to take you down and show you your place.

"are you serious, Leo?"

your voice cuts so deep into his chest, deeper than any knife of the most dire sharpness.

"this has to be a prank. you're not my type, puppy, and you know that."

you reach out to ruffle his ears, you think it's all just a joke at his own expense. you won't even look him in the eyes long enough to see how dark and cold they've become. if you don't see that he loves you now...

well, he'll just have to make it clear to everyone, so you'll never doubt him again.

Mel

"Mh? Is that an attitude I sense?"

it is. undoubtedly. but it's of little importance to him--he knows how to play this game, and he'll play it better than you ever will. you mouth off like you've never been shut up before, that much is very clear, and he didn't mind so much at first. thought it was just a little teasing back and forth, which isn't unnatural considering his personality.

but you don't wanna be his, and that's not allowed! haven't you realized by now that you're special? what the two of you have is rare, impossible even--he loves you so much he would give up his own life, and he knows you would do the same if you just admit it to yourself.

but you're so closed off. you serve back every flirtation with sass, get mouthy with him when he tries to be real and honest with you about anything, much less those times that you've been alone together and he tries to tell you how he feels.

this isn't how things are supposed to be. he won't let you shy away from the most passionate love he'll ever let you experience.

Noel

"Please, just listen to me....I love you."

how could you do this to him? just stop, pause, and stare right into his soul....and give him attitude? you're gonna make jokes like he didn't just pour his whole heart out to you?

what else can he do, now? he feels so lost, and for once your smile can't comfort him when you're holding back saying something rude to him. he doesn't want to cry, he wants to be strong, but the tears spill down his cheeks whether he wants them to or not.

"c'mon Noel, you know I don't want to be with you. is it really such a surprise?"

oh, now you've done it. his tears will abide soon, but only because he's realized what you're doing now.

you're just trying to string him along. test him to see if he's worthy enough to deserve being yours. and with that in the back of his head, he can find the strength to smile through the pain in his heart--because nobody has more patience than he does, and you'll understand just how much of your abuse he'll endure for the sake of your love.

Vivi

"So feisty, so cute! That's all I need to hear. You're mine."

it's adorable how you think a little brattiness will get you off the hook. don't you realize she's the master of this little game you've got going on? a few little scathing remarks aren't gonna make her run with her tail between her legs--in fact, quite the opposite. she loves the chase, after all.

"yeah right, Vivi. I don't think so, but thanks anyway."

aww, are you getting a little scared? she can see the twitch of your fingers against your arm, that look in your eye that befits an animal of prey. you couldn't get rid of her if you tried, and even if you did it would just end up pissing her off. so you keep hiding behind that wall of words you always put up to protect yourself, but she's gonna tear it down in seconds and take you for herself if you're not careful.

oh, dear. she didn't just say all that out loud, did she? your eyes are really struck with terror now...but it's such a cute look, isn't it? it really suits you more than all that attitude you like to give.

"just be still, darling." it'll hurt a lot more than your words ever could, otherwise.

Avi

"Settle down, little red. Don't make me bite you."

he's always liked playing with his food, but you bring a whole new meaning to that. you distract him with your little remarks and snarky comments, sometimes so much so that he forgets how perfect you would look with his teeth against your throat. he could choke you down and spit you up, churn you up from the inside out and leave you wanting more, absolutely ruin you so nobody else would even think of picking up such a filthy little pet.

and you still give him the best view of that pretty little mouth of yours. just that one comment alone has you giving him lip like your life depends on it, but all he can see is your energy wearing down bit by bit, your breaths getting slower with every passing word you spit back at him with more sass than you should be allowed. maybe he'll suit you up with a muzzle if you get this mouthy on your way back to his place.

just wear yourself out, he thinks to himself. you can't keep up the chase forever, little red.

Leigh

"I think you need to wash your mouth out."

does it not sound as serious when it comes from him? you laugh like you think he's joking, but he couldn't be more sincere. you like to tease him but this is different, this stings right in his heart and you know exactly how to twist the knife so it'll hurt the most. he can already imagine the expression you'll make when he grabs you by the jaw, fingers digging into your cheeks so you'll open up and he can squirt a bit of soapy foam on to your little pink tongue. just so you know he's really serious...but he can't stop thinking of sticking something else in there too, something that will really show you how serious he is.

he doesn't remember every little comment or ill-spirited jab, but the pang in his chest when you brush off his compliments and flirtations is enough for him to know it happens more often than it needs to. you're just being difficult for attention, and that's okay. you just need more of it, that's all, and who better to give it to you than him?

who better, darling? he'll wait for your answer, as long as it'll take to hear his name on the tip of your tongue.

Thorn

"Are you sure you wanna play this game with me?"

it's less of a question, more of a test. Thorn likes to drop these little riddles into your lap, and stand back to see how you'll react when he does. it's field research.

"you're gonna lose anyways, so what does it matter?"

oh, how cheeky. you always surprise him no matter what he throws at you, and this is no different--but this time he's just sick and tired of the answer. it's always the same no matter which way you phrase it, like unwrapping a candy and finding each one to be your least favourite flavour. there's always a part inside of him that thinks you're gonna change your mind one day, as if by a magical transformation--but no, you refuse, and to be honest it's really starting to irritate him.

you really don't know how good you could have it, do you? you don't understand how much he's been doing out of sight, and for you out of mind, just to ensure your happiness. you're royalty, and you don't even know it even when your prince is staring you right in the eyes, begging for the smallest scrap of your attention.

but you'll be the one begging soon. he knows it for sure.

Ilya

"That's enough out of you."

you may find it funny, but he doesn't think the same about you mocking him. sometimes he dreams about slapping that stupid little smirk off your face, but he's swiftly reminded that that may garner him the opposite reaction that he wants. people don't often take kindly to violence, that's right....but oh, you make it look so tempting. perhaps one day he'll get the chance to feel your throat bend beneath his palms, and listen to those sweet cries sputtering off your lips as you gasp for air....but you have to accept his love first, and you've promised him that it's never going to happen.

don't you realize how it breaks his heart? that your rejection time and time again is enough to make him feel like he may just die without you? why do you always do this to him?

he just has to collect himself. breathe. remember that your constitution is much weaker than his--you can't keep up this fight forever, and once you realize that he has no intention of letting you be loved by another soul on this earth, that's when he'll swoop in and claim you all for himself.

[serenity-songbird]

RULES:

(Requests are now Closed...)

So within my first two days I have gotten so many requests and I realized how much I love answering them. So, I have decided to spread my horizon. I will do requests fooor:

Acception (Webtoon)

Avengers

Avatar: The Last Airbender

Be More Chill

Brass and Sass (Webtoon)

Danny Phantom

Demon Slayer

Down To Earth (Webtoon)

Ducktales

Game of Thrones

Garten of Ban Ban

Hetalia

Hogwarts Legacy

Homestuck

Is It Wrong To Pick Up Girls In A Dungeon?

Jujutsu Kaisen

Kingdom Hearts

Komi Can't Communicate

Legend of Korra

Let's Play (Webtoon)

Lore Olympus (Webtoon)

Mage and Demon Queen (Webtoon)

Miraculous Ladybug

My Hero Acadamia

My Little Pony

Muted (Webtoon)

Mystic Messenger

Naruto

New Girl

Peaky Blinders

Poppy Playtime

Rising Of The Shield Hero

Seven Deadly Sins

Soul Eater

South Park

Spy X Family

Steven Universe

Stranger Things

Teen Titans

The Disastrous Life of Saiki K.

Undertale

Voltron: Legendary Defender

Welcome Home: The Puppet Show

The Witch and the Bull (Webtoon)

Young Justice

-I will do headcanons, one shots, and scenarios.

-I will no longer do NSFW. The previous works will still be available, but any new requests will be deleted.

-I honestly do not do Yandere. (I personally dealt with one in a previous relationship and it will trigger bad memories). I'm sorry I wont do it.

-No more than 4 characters at a time.

-I am very open-minded and I believe in Love is Love. Any character you can come up with I will do.

-I'm also open to draw, buuut I'm not exactly a great drawer so it will take some time and may or may not look exactly like you wanted. (Don't say I didn't warn you).

Those are my rules. Thank you for reading and requesting. Have a wonderful day!!! 😊😊😊

~Master List Link~

NOTE: I will do characters not the list as well. I just inputted the names at the top of my head.