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purgatoryandme · 4 years ago

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Fade-touched. With no magic of her own, the Fade still dictates Hawke’s every move. It forces her to become a better escape artist near-daily - a runner from the moment her feet could first stay steady under her wobbling legs. Fade-touched. Fade-held. Fade-crushed. Her mother thinks the Fade is something they can run from. Maybe she’s right. Maybe if it were just the Fade, Hawke could tip it a crooked grin, do some fancy footwork, and then put it behind her like so many towns and Templars. From the moment she laid eyes on her twin siblings, though, and then again from her sixteenth year onward (a weight at her back briefly lifted, hefted into her arms like the twins so many years ago - begging to be spun, slashing through ozone and salt), Hawke knows there are some things that can never be escaped. Fade-touched. Fate-marked. She was always going to be a story. ____________________ Fade-touched and fate-marked. Sixteen years old with a long sword strapped to her back (freshly cleaned and swaddled in oilcloth), Hawke contemplates that which cannot be escaped. On the long walk home she laughs bitterly over the irony of it all. A life spent on the run, perfecting the skill until it was second nature, and she can’t escape this one thing. She doesn’t even want to. She doesn’t know what she would be without it. (A person, perhaps) (Certainly not a story) ____________________ Varric hears about her long before he sees her. Of course, that’s usually how his introductions go. His ears are open long before his eyes. None of his informants are terribly good with paints or charcoal, you see (useless bastards - he should get them to practice portraiture so he’s never caught so thoroughly off-guard again). The Amell siblings did not enter Kirkwall quietly. There was a lot of kicking and screaming and wailing. Business as usual, really. Most people didn’t enter Kirkwall willingly, and those that did were usually desperate enough for the usual theatrics to apply anyway. Still, the Amells made a splash. Disgraced (by an affair with an apostate no less) ex-nobles returning to an estate that’s been gambled away by a drunk?Juicy. Well, juicy to thieves. Until they proved to be dirt-poor Ferelden refugees barely worth whatever fee Arenthel was paid to get them into the city. Then, THEN, one of the siblings turned out to BE the fee Arenthel was paid. Just the one. Intriguing, but Varric can think of a lot of reasons Arenthel would pay for a pretty face - dark hair and blue eyes. Probably not the boy, too brawny and sour to be good at collecting information. The girl could be useful - her walking stick wasn’t fooling anyone, but those delicate features sure could. He’d overlooked the third Amell child entirely. A rookie mistake, really, her chosen last name notwithstanding. He let himself look (well, let his informants look) without really seeing. And when you were just looking...well. Hawke didn’t look like much. Or rather she didn’t look much like her siblings, who stood out in the way that you’d expect any purchase to in this city. In the way you’d expect a dirty secret to. It hadn’t occurred to anyone not in the know that Hawke was related to any of them. For all intents and purposes, coming from nobility as the Amells did, Hawke seemed to be a bodyguard (just like the red-haired guardswomen). She wasn’t the product of careful Kirkwall breeding. She didn’t even look Ferelden. Hawke’s nose seems certain to be her namesake. Prominent and high-bridged, hooked in a way that was unusual for people of her colouring (and, if Varric is being honest, the kind of thing that would prevent her from ever having a career at the Rose. Or, he’ll think later with ink and paper in hand, from ever being forgotten). Her skin is dark enough to look Rivaini, which, coupled with the russet-dark of her hair and her build (broad shoulders and hips, thick thighs, tall enough that his neck ached), is almost enough to make him forget the distinctly Ferelden nature of that nose. What makes him remember, what forces him to see the slightest family resemblance in the siblings he’s spying on, are her eyes frosty pale and narrow, or seemingly narrowed by thick heavy lashes, in the way only human eyes ever were (elves were always wide and guileless. Dwarves never seemed so...pointy. Qunari didn’t count - he didn’t look them in the eyes. Couldn’t at his height). Sharp, like ice chips, and made sharper against the warm tones of her skin. Wraith-like. Later, he’ll realize her eyes aren’t the same glowing Amell blue as the twins or her mother. Instead, they’re a shade of green so pale it’s nearly grey. He’ll only realize this when Carver makes it clear they consider her no sister of theirs, however, and he’ll wonder how he missed it over a week at her side. He’ll wonder that often about Hawke - how he missed things. How he missed her.

She’s a stunner, that’s for sure. Just not in an entirely good way. She cuts an intimidating figure, larger than life somehow, with features so bold that Varric can practically hear the nobles waxing poetic about her ugliness for years to come. Choppy dark hair and mismatched armour over dense muscle just make her seem more boyish and boorish, adding another layer to the tableau. Adding another layer to the distance between her and her picture-perfect siblings.

She’s certainly something - maybe something he hadn’t learned the words for yet (something that will send him, drunk and careening, to his library time and again. Paging cover to cover through poetic epics for a hero that had even a fraction of the something he wanted to describe). Not at all what he expected from the whisperings or from keeping tabs on the mage Amell in case the Templars ruined something interesting before it got to be INTERESTING. He’d expected a catlike rogue or some Feredelen beauty. Something for the history books, you know? Tawdry and bawdy and fitting to the tales he’d later spin in the Hanged Man for drunks and gentry alike. Varric’s forgotten that first impression a thousand times over and reread it on an old ledger just as many times. Hawke has a way of doing that to him. Making him forget the past, replacing it with their present (visceral like a knife to the gut. Which he’s experienced with her. More than once). Hawke also has a way of being underestimated at first glance. Maybe that’s why Bartrand refuses her and the little cutpurse thought he could get clever. Varric puts on a show with Bianca. Hawke is alone - no siblings in sight. She’d only volunteered herself for the expedition. It’s jarring to suddenly have the woman he’s been watching for hours watch him back. Even as she makes quips with the best of them, Varric can’t help but feel like she’s waiting for a blow. Hawke’s guarded in the way a kicked dog is. Unpredictable in the same sense. It makes Varric nervous, but also makes it impossible to walk away. He wants this one on the expedition. He thinks she’ll make it worth his while (just like Arenthel earned her money four times over with just one of a set of three. She passed up on an apostate beauty who knew healing magic. Hawke was definitely someone he’d take a bet on). She does. Creators, she does and then some, wrenching Varric and Anders, the Grey Warden she’d blackmailed and cajoled into accompanying them, through the Deep Roads with an animal glint in her eyes that increases with every day spent in the dark. She jokes with them often, but it isn’t until the near-endless battling with Darkspawn drains even her to the ends of her reserves that she begins to tell them stories to keep their long march going. “My father was an apostate.” She tells them, not meeting their eyes, likely anticipating and disliking their knowledge of this fact (Anders, through his willingness to come along at all. Varric because he was Varric - no stone unturned), “He was never contained in the Circle. To hear him tell it, he was never escaping anything. He moved because he felt like it. Because there was a great plan that he was following, and if it lead him away from the Templars? So be it.” Garrett Hawke was a man who did not exist, at least according to every record Varric had scoured (and he had, he believed, scoured them all). Varric had thought, up until this point, that the name was simply an alias. He still thought that, but now... Well, he had to wonder. Hawke’s sibling had never been caged. Perhaps her father flew free, too? Anders certainly seemed to think so (the animal glint in Hawke’s eyes was fever-bright in his own, near-glowing against the dirt and Darkspawn blood smeared on his skin). “Freedom isn’t free.” Hawke says, a sardonic little twist to her lips causing her teeth to flash in the torchlight as she glances at Anders, “He paid for it in destiny and a dragon was the shopkeep.” Varric would laugh at the frustrated befuddlement on the mage’s face if it wasn’t echoed on his own. “My father made this blade.” Another day, another story. The long sword on Hawke’s back stayed wrapped, no matter the fight to be had, twin daggers finding themselves home in her hands and her enemies throats. It was only exposed in moments like these - where she carefully oiled it as they made camp. “We forged it together, but the materials were things he had for years. It was mine to carry the moment it was finished. I’d never heard my mother so angry with him.” “Were you just a pipsqueak?” Varric asks, struggling to imagine her as something so small and soft as a child, “Not quite as tall as your sword was high?” Her eyes crinkle, or at least he thinks they do (torchlight stopped being an option in the morning, and Anders’ mage light was a dim and eerie substitute). “I was thirteen.” She tells him, lifting a hand to indicate how tall she’d stood then (about his height, he was chagrined to see), “Beth had just come into her magic. Father took me on a hunt the moment he realized, deep enough into the Wilds that nobody stood a chance of finding us. We came back with a blade, no meat to speak of, and to a little girl who had half-incinerated our cottage. My being a child bore no mind in her anger.” She snickered, despite the flicker of something Varric felt at the image she’d painted (a child standing apart from their siblings, pushed there by a parent declaring their favourite, widening the chasm with the gift of a weapon handmade and crafted in a moment no other family had witnessed - an intimacy impossible to intrude on and rendered in steel), “Carver also flew into a bitter tantrum about wanting a sword shortly afterwards. Both her angels were little hellions for years after that hunt.” Despite knowing they were being baited, Varric still asked the question that had taken root in his mind; “What made them stop? I’m certain it wasn’t from maturing - the very idea would probably bring your brother to tears.” Hawke’s calloused hands caressed the edge of the blade, skin just barely splitting (a cut so thin blood didn’t even bead. Or at least, that’s how the mage light made it appear). Her face was carefully blank no matter how Varric strained his eyes as she replied, “They realized what it was for.”

____________________ Varric tucked Hawke’s stories away for later contemplation. He embedded them into the skin of his arms with quill and ink, determined to remember their exact wording, on the night (or day or midmorning or whatever passed for time under the blasted Darkspawn damned ground) when Anders finally allows Justice out to play, emitting enough light and power that they can struggle their way to the surface, and Hawke mutters something about the Fade that has the spirit’s pupilless eyes settle on and see her. There’s something there. A story. He pieces it together in fits and starts. Junior, Carver Amell (who doesn’t deserve to go by that name, not with the sharp distaste he displays whenever Hawke calls him Carver like he’s asked), trails after them post-expedition and post-Bethany (sweeter than her brother, her bitterness reminiscent of dark chocolate instead of stale beer and regret) entering the Circle. Hawke doesn’t turn him away - Varric suspects she can’t after her sister turned her back on her protection and willingly joined the one thing their family had run from for years - and so Varric has a source of information. He’s somewhat loathe to use it, though. He doesn’t love the way Junior wields his words. They’re such clumsy weapons - he’s liable to hurt himself just as badly as he intends to hurt Hawke.

Still. Still - Varric is shameless in his pursuit of a story. He’s done more disgusting things (though sometimes...sometimes Hawke looks at him, ice-chip eyes warmed by firelight and wine and Wicked Grace, and her mouth twists a little. That same sardonic grin he’d seen underground when she told them freedom isn’t free. And he doesn’t like that look sitting on her face, not when it’s turned his way). And it’s worth it. It repulses him to think it, but all those little bits of information he’s hoarded are worth it. Because their party is chased down by Tevinter thugs in a set-up orchestrated by a magic-hating elf tattooed in lyrium who can physically reach into a person’s chest to crush their heart, and the most fascinating thing to happen was little brother’s subsequent freak out. “Chase him off!” He hissed into Varric’s ear, bent double to do so and no doubt rendering himself a comical image (red-faced under Fenris’ cool scrutiny and Hawke’s stiff-backed refusal to turn to him). “He can literally tear my heart from my chest. Forgive me if I’m not inclined to chase him off my lawn.” Varric hissed back, half-hysterical as Fenris’ gaze drifted between them. “You’ll have bigger things to worry about if he sticks around!” Junior fired back, shaking Varric by the shoulders and gesturing at Fenris’ bristling armour and weapons. “Hawke’s ‘I murder dragons and also really big spiders’ sized sword is almost the same size as his. While you’re all busy seeing which is the bigger thing to worry about, I’ll just run off to High Town in a set of heels where you lot will never think to look for me.” Varric mutters, much more careful than little brother (the littlest, with his petty attitude - a little dog barking at some junkyard Mabari) to keep his voice down, though Fenris’ lips twitched anyway. “Don’t talk about it like that.” Junior snarled viciously, “Her using it near him is exactly what I’m worried about. I don’t know what it will do.” Now Fenris’ shoulders were drawing up, impossibly spiky pauldrons growing dangerously close to his ears as his gaze flitted over to Hawke, who sighed unhappily. “I’m not going to stab you, Fenris. Not even in a fun way.” She said, sliding her daggers back into their sheaths and rolling out her neck with a crooked grin (one that didn’t reach her eyes and sent another stab of dislike rolling through Varric towards her bratty little brother that rose in sharp competition with his curiousity). “Is it enchanted?” Fenris asked, gravelly voice walking a knifes’ edge between interest and distaste that mirrored Varric’s own thoughts too well for comfort (he was pretty sure Fenris was crazier than a nug on lyrium - the comparison wasn’t flattering). “I’m pretty enchanted with it.” Hawke replied, sweeping the oilcloth bundle off her back and resting her weight on the pommel, driving the tip of the blade against the cobblestones below, “Most people find gifts enchanting, though.” A not at all smooth or subtle evasion, though Varric had to admire the way she’d managed to imply that if it was enchanted, it certainly wasn’t her who had done it. Fenris had cottoned on to the same idea, but Carver looked like he was about to burst a blood vessel. “Your...brother certainly seems to think there is something I would find distasteful about it. I doubt he’s worried about my wellbeing.” The humour in Fenris’ voice didn’t quite cover his unease, but it did reflect a desire to please. Varric was certain the elf meant to stick around if he could now that he was certain Hawke was no mage. “Distasteful?” Hawke laughs, leaning more heavily on the blade and flicking her gaze to Carver on time to see his wince, “No, he only applies that word to our kinship. He thinks you’ll turn out to be a thief.” Fenris’ jaw set and Varric’s heart quickened in response. Carver’s fingers practically crushed his shoulder. “Of a blade?” Fenris asked, taking a menacing step forward. Hawke chuckled again, though her knuckles had gone white where they wrapped around an exposed silvery green pommel. “No,” She shook her head, sardonic twist of the lips in place as she tutted, “Of a life.” Offence coloured Fenris’ sharp retort of, “Yours?” Making it blunt and threatening as he drew even closer. “Not mine.” She shrugs, "One that can’t be stolen, bought and sold. It’s a pointless fear related to those.” She taps a single finger against Fenris’ exposed throat, directly over a silvery green line, before leaning back and hefting her blade back to its resting place between her shoulders. Carver abruptly lunged forward, fingers still buried in Varric’s tunic (dragging him a stumbling step towards Hawke despite his dwarven weight. Quite the feat for little brother). “Don’t let her touch you!” He snapped at the elf, “Or she’ll kill you, too!” Turning on her heel, Hawke's face disappeared from view. She began to stride away, heading off to the Hanged Man most likely, without a single glance back. Instead she called out over her shoulder: “Maybe my poison touch doesn’t affect dwarves, because Varric’s not dead yet, Carver. I think you might actually beat me to that particular punch.” Needless to say, the elf followed. Varric did, too, unable to walk away when his last sight of her was her back. Junior didn’t. ____________________ “She’ll kill you, too.” Words meant something to Varric. Even the ones spilled from an imbecile’s lips (one who had realized Varric was not his friend, unfortunately. He couldn’t mourn the loss much, though something in his chest felt slightly out of place when Hawke cast a look about the Hanged Man on Wicked Grace nights and sighed at the utter lack of her brother’s presence. He’d come crawling back eventually, as unable to ignore her and she was him). “Too.” Meant something. It meant something in the context of that damnable blade, that sardonic twist of Hawke’s lips that meant she was telling a story, the one that meant honesty and a certain resignation (an animal glint in her eyes in the dark, a cornered animal that always knew the tunnel had an end, that always knew it was going to fight to its bloody last). “What made them stop?” “They realized what it was for.” “She’ll kill you, too!” Not enchanted, but enchanting. Apostate-forged in the Wilds by a man who bought his freedom for the price of destiny from a dragon. The answer was obvious. Somehow, though, Varric couldn’t quite put pen to paper. Couldn’t write down a new observation in one of dozens of journals dedicated to Hawke, the only way to keep track of all that made her her before she talked her way into making him forget. Sighing, Varric pushed his unbound hair back from his face. Slipped his glasses from his nose. Pressed his forehead to the page as he closed his eyes. He was shameless for a good story. Ruthless in its pursuit. He wanted - no, needed - answers. And yet. He could wait for this one. For another sardonic twist of the lips. For more crumbs that Hawke would drop at his feet, knowing he would pick them up, finding their reassembly as inevitable as her brother’s dislike and her mother’s silence (living in a manor Hawke had purchased with children Hawke had been bought and sold for). Pressing his face ever further into the paper, Varric groaned in horror. He didn’t want to be another inevitability in Hawke’s life. He wanted to be a choice.

#hawke x varric #things that I'll never finish #garrett made a deal with flemeth when he was just a boy #struck the bargain with her most might strike with a demon when the fade grew to be too much #magic the likes of which none of his peers had #freedom to follow his heart's desires and to be secure in his head at night #with the knowledge that one day his head would no longer be secure #and he would either become a monstrosity and be wiped off the face of the planet #or he could die a different way #not quite dying not quite immortal #a true plaything for something that has maybe lived forever but maybe hasn't #he bargained a daughter and destiny #there's a reason maybe that hawke doesn't look anything like her mother despite being born from her ohohohoho #he groomed hawke to be what she is since she was young #a wild untameable thing that can run far and wide and free from all but destiny #with a mind that is never quite honest #because she dreams in the Fade like all people do #but she's awake there. really and truly.#no magic to speak of #but wrapped in it nonetheless - a conduit despite all odds #when beth comes into her magic hawke links her and her father #so he makes the blade that's been in his bargain for years #and he gives it to her to carry with the knowledge that #on the day he becomes a monstrosity she will cut him down before his soul is torn to shreds in the fade #and that she'll keep him and his blood magic with her #he's kinda a shitty dude? loves her but doesn't REALLY care for his family in the face of destiny #he never concealed from leandra that he wanted hawke to kill him and she's horrified by the idea #and then hawke does it because she's always done what garrett has asked of her #and leandra just CANT #and carver is bitter for years because he wanted to be trusted like that

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starcatcher-wulf · 5 years ago

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Prompt #22: Memory (original prompt)

@sea-wolf-coast-to-coast @trc-xiv @eorzean-capitalist

“He was always braver than me.”

Ren said with a sigh. tilting back what had to have been the last of the second bottle of this (surprisingly good) “venom” whiskey that’s been taking Uldah by storm. He wondered how much the mystery man who made this stuff brought in through sales. Rich people would buy any stupid thing that they regard as a curiosity, nowadays. and there had to be a reason it was taking hold.. other than the fact that the cobra inside gave a nice, salty finish that one could only notice once the tongue was desensitized to the burn. He offered the third and final bottle to Tobias so he could take the first shot. Ren had to break the news to their father at some point. preferably before his network of informant told him. His brother, twisted to a monster and killed by his own hand. “Yugiri Said you made it quick. I’m glad for that. You’ve always been such a good lad.” Tobias said, already red in the face but still managing to put the booze away before sliding the bottle back to his hulking lion of a son. “You and he always had a good sense of justice growing up, you know? Always doing the right thing. like when Atticus chased down that cutpurse, and you tore off to find the nearest guard for help. “It worked, yeah. but then Atticus had to talk me out of trouble with the guard. he thought I was trying to stir up trouble, myself. I had strength, he had the privilege. we made a good team.” He stared down into his shot glass as if seeking answers from the amber liquid within. “we still could have made a good team.” “Hey...” Tobias crooned, reaching out to tousle the Hrothgar's beard and stroke his face. “ Hey hey hey.. none of that, okay? You both were doing what you thought was right.” “.. Yes, sir,” Ren responded, gently brushing aside his father's hand. He loved the touch, but he wasn’t a kid anymore. and he didn’t want people staring. “What about you, Father? what will you do now?” “ I think it’s about time I defected.” “ I already knew that... I meant.. how can you handle it. you said there are others who have defected like me and others like Atticus. but for you, it doesn't matter what side you’re on.. how can you stand knowing that there's a non zero chance of your children killing each other?” “A very fair question,” he said before taking his next shot with Ren in unison. watching him as he poured the next ones. “And the answer is.. I don’t.. not really. it breaks my heart each time I think about it. but I also know that they are doing their best with the things I've taught them. and I can only hope they guide themselves to a point in time where they can all live happily together again. And I'm hoping that fate is kind enough to let me live to see it.” Renard nodded wordlessly before pounding his shot back again. he took a deep breath and started again.

“ Hey.. you remember that time that Atticus...”

#ffxivwrite2019 #ffxiv #ffxiv rp #my writing

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targonian-a-blog · 8 years ago

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i can’t believe this man

@tracelcss

#my art #OOC ~an aspect still needs help now and again #twisted fate #cutpurse twisted fate #what are arms

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finestfantasyxii · 7 years ago

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Final Fantasy XII Character Information

Disclaimer: All information is from official sources such as the ultimanias, merchandise like the official XII pins, and the websites, game guides, etc.

If a character’s age is different in the Japanese version compared to the Western version, the Japanese version will be listed first.

The character descriptions in Japanese can be located here.

Sky Pirate’s Den sprites are ripped by Shard of Truth. Revenant Wings sprites are ripped by Barubary. Pictlogica sprites are from Square Enix Bridge.

This post will be updated over time when we get around to all the ultimanias and such.

MAIN CHARACTERS

VAAN

Age: 17 (XII) 18 (RW)

Height: 170cm or ~5′5″ or 5′6″

Quickenings: Red Spiral, White Whorl, Pyroclasm

Eye Colour: Gray-Blue

Descriptions:

(NA Game Manual and website) "A boy who sees freedom in the skies." Living in the Rabanastre slums, Vaan maintains an air of hope even under the oppressive rule of the Empire. But he longs for more: a life without borders or authority. He dreams of becoming a sky pirate, free to go where he will.

(NA TZA website) Living in the Rabanastre slums, Vaan maintains an air of hope even under the oppressive rule of the Empire. But he longs for more: a life without borders or authority. He dreams of becoming a sky pirate, free to go where he will—though the loss of his family weighs heavy on his heart.

(Itadaki Street Portable) A bright-eyed boy who still dreams of being an airship pirate as his hometown falls beneath the Empire's mighty fist. Even after Dalmasca was taken control of by the Empire, Vaan maintains a positive attitude. His late brother was his only immediate family, so he took to caring for the younger children. Vaan dreams of becoming an airship pirate, flying freely in the sky.

(Piggyback Strategy Guide) He lost his family during the war and is now living as a cutpurse in the Lowtown district of the Royal City of Rabanastre. Even though life under the rule of the Empire isn't easy, the 17-year-old boy looks to the future with an air of hope. He dreams of one day becoming a Sky Pirate, with his own airship to command.

(Bradygames Strategy Guide & PrimaGames) After losing his parents to the plague and his brother Reks to treachery and war, Vaan is now a child of the streets. He's now a leader of a sub-culture of war orphans who roam the slums of Rabanastre.

(Bradygames Revenant Wings Strategy Guide) Vaan has spent most of his young life dreaming of being a sky pirate. Recent remarkable events (chronicled in Final Fantasy XII) have made that dream come true. But a seemingly simple treasure hunt with old allies Fran and Balthier unleashes a mind-boggling chain of events. Vaan loses one airship, gains another, and hurtles skyward with his friends on an adventure to an ancient sky continent.

(Revenant Wings manual) A young sky pirate whose journey throughout Ivalice have taught him so much. At last the captain of his own airship, Vaan travels the skies in search of adventure.

(Tactics A2) Final Fantasy XII's leading man. Tempered by his many adventures, Vaan has matured in the intervening years, but he remains spirited and carefree—some might say careless. Now famous sky pirates, he and his partner, Penelo, even find themselves plagued by impostors.

(Opera Omnia) An orphan from the Kingdom of Dalmasca who dreams of becoming a sky pirate. While he despised the empire for taking his brother's life, he was helpless until a twist of fate brought him and Princess Ashe together. Along with his childhood friend, Penelo, and the sky pirate, Balthier, he sets out on a cosmic journey to free their homeland.

(Dissidia 012) A cheerful youth who skillfully uses a variety of weapons in battle. Confident in his skills, he fearlessly enters any fierce battle.

Misc:

Both Ashe and Vaan were used during the production of Final Fantasy XIII to stand in for unfinished characters.

PENELO

Age: 16 (XII), 17 (RW) ; 17 (XII), 18 (RW)

Height: 160cm or ~5′2″

Quickenings: Intercession, Evanescence, Resplendence, Dance of Rapture

Eye Colour: Honey Brown

Descriptions:

(OG NA Game Manual and website) "Vaan's friend." "A girl who wants peace." Like Vaan, Penelo calls Rabanastre's Lowtown home. She watches over Vaan, trying to keep him from getting into too much trouble. Though she lost her family in the war with the Empire, Penelo is ever cheerful, making her way by doing odd jobs in and around the city. She enjoys the lighter side of life, but Penelo is not altogether unfamiliar with battle. While she remains untested in a true fight, her brothers, who belonged to the Order, taught her the fundamentals of combat. Penelo believes that in perseverance, there is hope.

(NA TZA website) A young woman who suffered the tragic loss of her family during the war, Penelo is Vaan’s friend since childhood and always looks out for him. She is brave and will not lose sight of herself, even when she gets caught up in a conspiracy that will shake a nation.

(Itadaki Street Portable) A girl orphaned by the war. Penelo tries to maintain a good attitude. She knows martial arts, but prefers to dance. Childhood friend of Vaan, born into a wealthy merchant family, but orphaned during the war. Penelo likes to sing and dance, but also knows martial arts - as her brothers had wanted to become knights. Penelo has a cheerful spirit that encourages the people around her.

(Piggyback Strategy Guide) 16-year-old Penelo lives in the Lowtown district of Rabanastre like Vaan, and makes her living by running errands for a respected merchant called Migelo. This cheerful girl acts as if she was Vaan's elder sister,always trying to keep him out of trouble. Despite her youth, she doesn't shy away from combat thanks to the tricks her brothers taught her.

(Bradygames Strategy Guide & PrimaGames) Penelo loves Vaan like a brother. Her own parents, who were lost in the recent war, took in Vaan after his loss and raised him as one of their own. She sees the natural leader in him, even if he doesn't quite see it himself.

(Bradygames Revenant Wings Strategy Guide) She may be the "mother hen" of the group and her cooking may be suspect, but Penelo is an unspoken leader of Rabanastre's subculture of war orphans. Her steady, healing support abilities make her an indispensable member of every battle party.

(Revenant Wings manual) Vaan's childhood friend, always there to lend a helping hand--or a proper scolding. Penelo is ever the faithful navigator, even when Vaan strays off course in new (and alarming) ways.

(Tactics A2) Vaan's steadfast partner, Penelo sometimes gently—but more often severely—keeps him from staying too far off course. Already a famed sky pirate, she is also fast gaining renown as a skillful dancer.

(Opera Omnia) A cheerful young girl taken under the wing of local shopkeeper Migelo after being orphaned in the war. Her concern for Vaan leads to her first encounter with the sky pirate, Balthier, and a misunderstanding which pits her in a battle against Archadia. Penelo learned martial arts from her elder brothers and dreams of becoming a dancer.

Misc:

Originally her hair colour was meant to be a kind of pinkish colour. In the Final Fantasy XII Ultimania Omega, Akihiko Yoshida says he originally designed her with pink hair, but there were problems with the color in-game, it looked washed-out(?), so he gave her blonde hair instead.

There is a translation out there for one of her Japanese character description that says she only has one brother whereas other translations including localized ones say she has more than one. Both say they were part of the Order.

In Revenant Wings, Penelo is said to be a terrible cook at the start of the game. So much so that Vaan and Kytes can’t stomach eating all of it, but do it anyways to make her happy. By the time Larsa joins the group, Penelo has improved a lot to the point Larsa loves her cooking so much, he buys (or upgrades) her diner in the Galbana. By the end of the game, she’s improved substantially.

Basch and Penelo are the only ones of the main cast of characters to not have a Play Arts/Play Arts Kai figure for them.

In the original Japanese version of Final Fantasy XII, Penelo’s kidnapping scene is not present. Producer Akitoshi Kawazu said in an interview, it was because of a ratings issue, and there were similarities between Penelo’s kidnapping and real-world incidents in Japan at the time.

Penelo’s English voice actor, Catherine Taber, also voices Queen Andoria Kaya Tranka Fam Forturio from Final Fantasy Type-0 HD.

Penelo and Vaan’s relationship is developed further in Final Fantasy XII: Revenant Wings. Penelo, also, mentions how she wants their relationship to be like Fran and Balthier’s.

In the Revenant Wings Ultimania and the Final Fantasy XII Scenario Ultimania, Penelo is referred to as Vaan’s girlfriend.

BALTHIER

Full Name: Ffamran “Balthier” Mied Bunansa

Age: 22 (XII), 23 (RW)

Height: 183cm or 6′

Quickenings: Fires of War, Tides of Fate, Element of Treachery

Eye Colour: Hazel-Green

Descriptions:

(OG NA game manual and website) "A dashing sky pirate." He would describe himself as a noble thief, stealing only from those who deserve it. He goes where he pleases, swearing fealty to no one. While roaming the skies of Ivalice with Fran, his viera partner, he still makes time to charm the ladies with his silver tongue and put wrongs to right-grinning all the while.

(NA TZA website) Balthier would describe himself as a noble thief, stealing only from those who deserve it. While roaming the skies of Ivalice, he still makes time to charm the ladies with his silver tongue and put wrongs to right—grinning all the while. And yet he has not entirely escaped from the demons of his past...

(Itadaki Street Portable) A young airship pirate who only steals from those he deems as wicked. His success attributes to his ally, Fran, and his airship, the Strahl. Pilot and commander of the airship, the Strahl, along with his partner, Fran, of the Viera race. Balthier threw away his past and ties to become a self-proclaimed righteous pirate. He smiles fearlessly without panic, even in dangerous situations. Ashe and Vaan meet him a local market.

(Piggyback Strategy Guide) Balthier is exactly what Vaan longs to become: a Sky Pirate. This handsome man, 22 years of age, roams the skies of Ivalice together with his Viera partner, Fran. With a gambler's love for risk-taking and a healthy disregard for the rules, he considers himself to be a good old-fashioned adventurer.

(Bradygames Strategy Guide & PrimaGames) A man of wit, charm and a mysterious past, Balthier owes allegiance to no crown or council. He prowls the skies of Ivalice with his partner Fran in search of treasure and perhaps something else...

(Bradygames Revenant Wings Strategy Guide) Captain of the legendary vessel named the Strahl, Balthier has become the most famous (and infamous) sky pirate of modern times in Ivalice. After reluctantly taking Vaan under his wing, he now faces a new and unsettling menance while teaching young apprentice that things are not always as they seem...

(Revenant Wings manual) Legendary sky pirate who flies his beloved airship, the Strahl, to the ends of Ivalice. He stepped from a limelight at the great war's end, keeping his whereabouts well hidden.

(Opera Omnia) A youthful sky pirate deeply attached to the wide blue yonder who roams the world with his partner, Fran. In an unexpected turn of events, he meets Vaan and gets caught up in a quest to restore Dalmasca. Although a man of charm and wit, he becomes highly sensitive when people bring up his past or father.

(Tactics WotL) A sky pirate who owes allegiance to no man or country. His skills as a machinist and thief are second to none. Balthier, branded a heretic by the Church, is searching for the Cache of Glabados. His path crosses Ramza’s when a false lead intended for him ensnares the young Beoulve as well.

Misc:

According to the Final Fantasy wiki, He and Doctor Cid were meant to have a conversation shown between the two of them during Balthier’s past when he was a Judge; the audio for this is still present on the Japanese version of the original Final Fantasy XII, but has been removed from later versions. However because there is a lack of sources for this, please take this with a grain of salt until someone can retrieve it from the game disc.

There is also a model of Balthier present in the data as a prisoner in Nalbina dungeons. This model was later reused for Basch with a simple head-swap.

Balthier shares his last name with Mustadio and Besrudio Bunansa from Final Fantasy Tactics.

Balthier’s Japanese voice actor, Hiroaki Hirata, is the voice of Captain Jack Sparrow in Kingdom Hearts II as well as Sanji from One Piece.

In The Zodiac Age, Balthier’s hair, earrings, and clothing did not move similar to Basch with his hair. This had been fixed for the PC release.

FRAN

Age: ~23-27 in Hume years*

Height: 187cm (6′1″) without her ears and 216cm (7′1″) with her ears

Quickenings: Feral Strike, Whip Kick, Shatterheart, Gaze of the Void

Eye Colour: Red-Brown

Descriptions:

(OG NA game manual and website) "A master of weapons." A viera warrior, Fran is as much at ease with a sword as she is her bare hands. Her proficiency with a blade is matched only by her skill with a wrench, as she also handles the maintenance of Balthier's airship, the Strahl. The lifespan of the viera is far greater than that of humes, and many secrets lie hidden in her long history. Yet, the divide of race does nothing to diminish the bond of trust between her and Balthier.

(NA TZA website) A viera warrior who forsook her forest home for the life of a sky pirate. Fran's prowess in battle is matched only by her skill with a wrench, as she also handles the maintenance of Balthier's airship, the Strahl. Her silent, inscrutable air belies a strong inner spirit and a readiness to risk anything to protect her hard-won freedom.

(Itadaki Street Portable) A member of the Viera race with a mastery of any weapon. Fran's sharp sense and knowledge of airships are invaluable to Balthier. A female Viera warrior with knowledge in weaponry and mechanics. She is in charge of maintainence of Balthier's airship, the Strahl. Fran is a calm person who makes wise decisions using her sharp senses. She trusts Balthier strongly.

(Piggyback Strategy guide) Fran is Balthier's "business partner". Amongst other things, she handles the maintenance of their airship, the Strahl. Although her age is unknown, she belongs to the Viera, who are distinguished by (among other things) their remarkable longevity.

(Bradygames Strategy guide & PrimaGames) A Viera female with a strong sensitivity to the Mist, Fran is a loyal partner and co-pilot to Balthier. She's quite a formidable warrior and a mechanic to boot. Her adjustment to the greater world since abandoning the forest dwellings of her race is nearly complete. But can one ever completely forsake the voice of the Wood?

(Bradygames Revenant Wings Strategy guide) The beautiful and mysterious viera is the longtime co-pilot and partner of Balthier. Her remarkable connection to the Mist that surrounds all life gives her an almost mystical ability to see the paths that must be taken... or avoided. Ignore her "feelings" at your peril!

(Revenant Wings manual) Mysterious and quiet, as viera are to be, Fran shares a bond of unshakable trust with her fellow sky pirate and partner, Balthier.

Misc:

*The official scenario ultimania lists Jote (the oldest of the Viera sisters) in the Hume equivalent of her 30s, and Mrjn (the youngest) in the equivalent of her late teens, around 18-20. This would put Fran (the middle sister) most likely anywhere between the equivalent ages of 21-29 / 23-27 in Hume years.

Fran shares her Japanese voice actor, Rika Fukami, with Sailor Venus/Minako Aino from the original Sailor Moon anime in Japan.

Fran makes an appearance in the Final Fantasy: Lost Stranger manga.

ASHE

Full Name: Ashelia B’nargin Dalmasca

Age: 17 (Beginning of XII), 19 (XII), 20 (RW)

Height: 165cm or 5′4″

Quickenings: Northswain's Glow, Heaven's Wrath, Maelstrom's Bolt, Empyrean's Edict

Eye Colour: Gray

Descriptions:

(OG NA game manual and website) "A princess who had lost everything." The only child of King Raminas and sole heir to the Dalmascan throne, Ashe is believed dead following the invasion. She meets Vaan and the others under the most unlikely of circumstances. Ashe knows all too well she lacks the power to right the wrongs committed against her and her kingdom, but she will not allow herself to admit defeat.

(NA TZA website) The only child of King Raminas and sole heir to the Dalmascan throne, Ashe is believed to have taken her own life two years ago amidst the invasion. In truth, she lives, secretly leading the Resistance with the hope that she will one day reclaim her kingdom.

(Itadaki Street Portable) Sole heir to the Dalmascan throne. Ashe fights alongside her people against the Empire's expanding control. In a small country that connects the Valendia and Ordalia continents, the surviving heir to the Dalmascan throne is the King's only daughter. As the country lowers its resistence to the oncoming threat of the Empire, Ashe feels it is her duty to save it. She is a worriful girl who often feels outright helpless.

(Piggyback Strategy Guide) The 19-year-old Princess Ashe is the only child of the late King Raminas and the sole heiress to the throne of Dalmasca. After the Empire invaded her home country, it was announced that she took her own life. Thankfully, reports of her death were greatly exaggerated. Her goal is now to form a resistance that will be able to reclaim her country's sovereignty.

(Bradygames Strategy Guide & PrimaGames) The daughter of the Dalmascan king and heir to the throne, Lady Ashe first loses her newlywed husband Rasler and then her country to the Archadian juggernaut. The official story is that she took her own life in the aftermath of the Imperial conquest. However, resistance is in her blood, as is the legacy of the Dynast-King.

(Bradygames Revenant Wings Strategy Guide) Heir to the legacy of the great Dynast-Kings of Dalmasca, Lady Ashe now sits on the throne of the ancient kingdom. A great warrior in her own right, she teams with Basch to form a formidable duo of unshakeable allies.

Misc:

Did you know many sources have said Ashe is an only child, but others have said she has at least 8 older brothers?

In the data for Final Fantasy XII, there is a ‘ghost’ model of Ashe among her other models. It is similar to how Rasler appears in the game outside of FMVs.

Both Ashe and Vaan were used during the production of Final Fantasy XIII to stand in for unfinished characters.

Ashe’s menu portrait is taken from her promotional poster, and not her official render like everyone else.

Ashe shares her English voice actor, Kari Wahlgren, with Aranea Highwind from Final Fantasy XV, Shelke from Dirge of Cerberus -Final Fantasy VII- and Ovelia Atkascha in Final Fantasy Tactics: The War of the Lions. Her Japanese voice actor, Mie Sonozaki, voices Jihl Nabaat from Final Fantasy XIII.

In the Final Fantasy XII Ultimania Omega, Akihiko Yoshida says he had many different designs for Ashe and isn’t sure how he came to design(?)/decide(?) on her current one.

BASCH

Full Name: Basch fon Ronsenburg

Age: 36 (XII), 37 (RW)

Height: 180cm or 5′9″

Quickenings: Fulminating Darkness, Ruin Impendent, Flame Purge, Apocalypse Shield

Eye Colour: Blue-Gray

Descriptions:

(OG NA game manual and website) "A loyal knight branded as traitor." A captain in the Order of the Knights of Dalmasca, Basch achieved renown as a gallant and brave hero credited with countless victories on the battlefield. He is a man of justice who cannot abide inequity. Unlike the other captains, who are chosen from the aristocracy, Basch is of common blood and enjoys the love of the people, until he inexplicably murders the King on the eve of a treaty-signing with Archadia. He is led away in chains. What could drive so loyal a man to slay his oathsworn liege?

(NA TZA website) A Dalmascan knight and captain once celebrated as a gallant and brave hero, Basch shocked the realm two years ago when he assassinated his own king on the eve of a treaty-signing with Archadia. Though public records say he was executed for treason, in truth Basch yet lives, imprisoned deep in the dungeons.

(Itadaki Street Portable) A wise warrior of Dalmasca. His prowess and dedication earns him overwhelming support from the people he serves. Warrior of the old Dalmasca Kingdom. His name is known amongst the generals. Once honored as a hero, Basch has been accused of the assassination of the Dalmascan King. After being released two years later, he protects Ashe, the remaining heir to the throne. Basch cares little for himself, believing only in justice.

(Piggyback Strategy Guide) 36-year-old Basch was a captain in the Order of the Knights of Dalmasca. A veteran of many battles, he was considered a brave and valiant knight, until an inexplicable event led to him being branded a traitor to his country. However, there may be more to him than meets the eye.

(Bradygames Strategy Guide & PrimaGames) This great hero of Dalmasca, captain of the Order of Knights, now stands accused of the assassination of his oathsworn liege, King Raminas. Word is that Basch saw the King's attempt to sue for peace with Archadia as a betrayal of the kingdom. But is that word true?

(Bradygames Revenant Wings Strategy Guide) The great captain of the Dalmascan Order of Knights and personal bodyguard of Queen Ashe, Basch is as steadfast and loyal as he is deadly with a melee weapon. His abilities can literally add a shield of protection to any party under siege.

Misc:

In Dissidia and Dissidia 012, Gabranth has an alternate outfit called “Captain’s Gear” which is a reference to the beginning of Final Fantasy XII when he impersonated Basch and killed King Raminas.

Basch and Penelo are the only ones of the main cast of characters to not have a Play Arts/Play Arts Kai figure for them.

In Japan, Basch’s title in the Order is general whereas in the English version, he is a captain.

Basch and Gabranth are twins, and Basch is the oldest and Gabranth is the youngest.

In The Zodiac Age, Basch’s hair is glitched in that it doesn’t move like the other party members. In the PC release this was fixed.

In the Japanese version of Final Fantasy XII during the scene when Reks is stabbed, Basch and Gabranth’s voices overlay leaving an air of mystery about who killed the king, but in the English version, there is no overlay. Gabranth is the one who speaks, not Gabranth and Basch.

OTHER CHARACTERS

REKS

Age: 17-18 (XII)

Eye Colour: Pale Blue

Misc:

Jovy, a seeq in Nalbina, eventually tells Vaan that his hero was Reks and that he looked up to him.

Reks’s Blade can be obtained by Vaan in Dissidia 012.

Reks shares his Japanese voice actor with Cecil Harvey from the Dissidia series and Final Fantasy IV 3D remake.

GABRANTH

Full Name: Noah fon Ronsenburg

Age: 36 (XII)

Eye Colour: Hazel

Descriptions:

(Dissidia) A warrior who swears his life to those he trusts.

(Dissidia 012) The guardian of the law who presides over judgments of life and death, his true strength is realized when he dons his helm.

Misc:

The most expensive piece of merchandise for Final Fantasy XII is a replica of Gabranth’s helmet.

According to Destructoid.com, it was around $1100. Play-Asia lists its size at 360mm.

Square Enix has also made a life-size replica of Gabranth’s armor.

In both Dissidia and Dissidia 012, Gabranth is voiced by Keith Ferguson who voices Basch instead of Michael E. Rodgers who voiced Gabranth in Final Fantasy XII.

REDDAS

Full Name: Foris “Reddas” Zecht

Age: 33 (XII)

Misc:

Reddas shares his English voice actor with Ramza Beoulve from Final Fantasy Tactics.

Reddas is younger than both Basch and Gabranth by three years.

AL-CID

Full Name: Al-Cid Margrace

Age: 27

Descriptions: (

Tactics A2) One of the Margrace family who controls Rozarria. Masters of espionage who travel the world in search of information. They are well known for keeping a woman, or several, in every port.

Misc:

Al-Cid is not seen in Revenant Wings, but is mentioned by Ashe to Balthier that she visited Rozarria and the sunset from the Ambervale is beautiful.

Al-Cid is also in Final Fantasy Tactics A2: Grimoire of the Rift and can be recruited after completing the quest A Dashing Duel.

His job class in Tactics is Agent and he cannot change jobs nor can he use support or reaction abilities.

Al-Cid shares his english voice actor, David Rasner, with Brother from Final Fantasy X and Final Fantasy X-2, as well as Trema from Final Fantasy X-2.

#final fantasy xii #vaan #penelo #fran #balthier #ashelia b'nargin dalmasca #basch fon ronsenburg #reddas #reks #gabranth #al cid margrace #ff12info

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leaguesbottombitch · 6 years ago

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Twisted Fate!

From gay baby EZ to gay baby jail tf okay

how much I like them (0-10): 6mastery level: 2mastery points: 2300favorite skin: Cutpurse worst/weakest skin: Musketeer favorite quote: D O I N I Tif I like to play against this champ: Its fun any ships?: Graves graves graves and only graves!!!

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bunnyandbirb · 7 years ago

Text

Bunny & Birb’s Spiciness Ranking : League of Legends Men

We play a shameful amount of League of Legends, and after this you’ll get the idea that it’s for all the wrong reasons.

For this week’s collab post, we decided to make a combined ranking of League of Legends male champions based on their level of spiciness.

We each made an individual list with rationale, and then ranks were averaged out to generate the final list. We also tried to rationalized our picks somewhat, and choose the most attractive skin for each.

The scale ranges from 1 (the most attractive) to 26 (least attractive). Then the average is obviously the average rank based on our individual ranks.

1. Talon - Average rank: 2.5 bunny: 4

Maybe it’s cus we can’t see his whole face that I think he’s attractive? I also just love assassins. SSW is the most attractive. He looks the most normal. Gives off an Altair from Assassin’s Creed vibe.

birb: 1

So I thought this guy would have potential, but wasn’t totally sure. His SSW skin is what removes all doubt and carries this dude all the way to the top. Black-haired rogue dudes get a thumbs up from me. (I also ship him with ma girl Quinn, and she deserves only the best.)

2. Ezreal - Average rank: 3 bunny: 2

I mean, he’s the most pretty boy of any of them. Has those nice Aryan features. Ace of Spades Ezreal has the cockiness that makes him worth it.

birb: 4

A generic anime bishounen type. I don’t know, I guess he just looks a little young for me? I’m also not recruiting for Hitler Youth. He definitely is one of the more objectively cute ones, though, so I can’t deny him that. Best skin is Ace of Spades, bonus points because he’s not blonde in that one.

3. Kayne - Average rank: 4 bunny: 5

Gotta love this edgelord and all his emo hotness. It’s like my high school dream. He only has one skin but it’s damn attractive.

birb: 3

While he runs away with the title of Edgiest League character, it cannot be denied that he (particularly dat skin) is attractive. Probably because he looks less like Sasuke in the skin.

4. Three-way tie - Average rank: 5.5

Vladimir bunny: 1

Academy Vlad appeals to all my shitty anime fantasies and I love him. He’s got condescending down cold. I’d call him senpai.

birb: 10

The whole vampire image was never really my type, and Vlad’s not an exception. Count Vlad is probably the most attractive one to me (once again, the black hair bias)

Ekko bunny: 6

Ekko has that devious type of appeal. Like the type that would totally get in trouble but you dig it. Sandstorm is probably the most attractive, mostly cus his others just look bad.

birb: 5

Ekko has a decent voice on him (even if he doesn’t stfu when you play him) and I’d say he’s pretty cute. He would have success at a co-ed mixer. His (Darude) Sandstorm skin is far, far superior to his regular one.

Zed bunny: 9

I mean we can’t see his face, so like he could be really hot. It’s a 50/50 chance. Shockblade is the most attractive since it proves he has real skin.

birb: 2

This pick is based entirely on faith that someone this edgy must appear equally edgy (and attractive). Also his movements have POWER and GRACE thus he must have a nice FACE. Championship Zed is shiny as fuck so it’s obviously most attractive skin.

5. Twisted Fate - Average rank: 7 bunny: 3

I think I find him attractive mostly because of his voice, though he’s pretty cool too. I wanna say Pax is my favorite just cus it’s rare af.

birb: 11

I like his drawl, the facial hair knocks off some points. Most attractive skin is Cutpurse, since it gets rid of his beard.

6. Two-way tie: Average rank: 9

Jhin bunny: 12

I’m using his obsession with roses as the reason that he’s a little more attractive than some of the other guys. Also…. ITS HIIIIIIIIGHHHH NOOOOOOONNNNN

birb: 6

Despite the obvious V for Vendetta vibes, I do weirdly like Jhin’s voice. And his /joke is kinda cute so I’m taking that into account. He also has Very Good posture! He only has one skin aside from his normal one, but I do like that better.

Varus bunny: 10

I guess purple eyes are pretty cool and he does have an 8-pack going on, though I’m not sure what the front of his hair is doing. Heartseeker Varus got me falling in love.

birb: 8

His eyes are a little creepy but if you look past that he’s probably a nice guy. Gimme some of that Varus Swiftbolt action, though. I would probably romance him in a Dragon Age game.

7. Lucian - Average rank: 9.5 bunny: 7

His eyebrows are very nicely groomed and he has no weird facial hair. Striker Lucian is the most attractive just because I love soccer players.

birb: 12

I feel a little weird trying to figure out how spicy a guy raging around about his dead wife is, but whatever. He has some nice cheekbones. Hired Gun is probably my favorite skin, because I like his hair in that one.

8. Two-way tie - Average rank: 11.5

Yasuo bunny: 16

Uh, Yasuo really knows how to use a sword *wink wink*. Plus he has some very nice, flowy hair. I would like to date him to steal his shampoo. Project Yasuo looks pretty cool and you can’t see his face so it’s better.

birb: 7

Separating him from the people that play him, appearance-wise he’s alright. As long as he doesn’t windwall, I could stand to look at him for extended periods of time. I might be projecting my Rurouni Kenshin feels onto him, though. I’d maybe pick Blood Moon, for no real reason.

Jayce bunny: 14

If you’re really into dads, then I guess Jayce would be for you. But like, that’s not my thing and I will kink shame you for it. Debonair his the skin where he looks the most suave (but still very dad)

birb: 9

He really does just look like my friend’s dad or something. He’s just an average looking dude, which is somehow better than the majority of the people on this list. Debonair skins will always be attractive skins.

9. Darius - Average rank: 12.5 bunny: 8

I’m only putting Darius 8th for Academy Darius. He might look like the school bully, but he still looks pretty attractive in that skin. Normal Darius, not so much.

birb: 17

The only viable Darius skin is Academy, and he still just looks like that guy who beats people up just for an ego trip.

10. Garen - Average rank: 13.5 bunny: 13

His head is weird shape so he’s not higher but Garen does have a nice face. Rugged Garen is the most attractive because his head isn’t so tiny in that one (unlike Dreadknight)

birb: 14

So Garen might be a bit of a pimplehead, but I look at something like Rugged Garen and say okay, I can fux with this.

11. Pantheon - Average rank: 15.5 bunny: 18

He’s less hairy than everyone below this. We also can’t see his face so no negative points there. Mediocre at best. Baker Pantheon is the most attractive cus there’s food involved.

birb: 13

I’m basing this purely off the fact that he wants to be a baker, and that’s kind of adorable. Favorite skin is obvious.

12. Two-way tie - Average rank: 16.5

Draven bunny: 11

His confidence is attractive I guess? Gotta love a guy who knows he’s great? Also have you seen those legs in Pool Party????

birb: 22

He has the crazy eyes, which are very deterring. Favorite skin is Soul Reaver, because his face is less of a face.

Graves bunny: 15

Graves looks more normal than some of the other dudes but he has so much chest hair. Ew chest hair. Also I don’t like smokers. I guess he looks the best in Mafia Graves, the red really brings out the flames.

birb: 18

A regular lookin’ shmuck. I guess he’s manry and all that, but why that facial hair. Mafia Graves is best, because it’s hard not to look good in an outfit like that.

13. Two-way tie - Average rank: 17.5

Xin Zhao bunny: 20

I have less of an opinion about him than I do Jarvan, which is really saying something, so he gets stuck here at the bottom. His face is boring and he’s boring. In Warring Kingdoms he has a slightly edgy thing going so he’s not all bad

birb: 15

Forgettable as hell, but not exactly ugly. I hate his ponytail, though. Most attractive skin is either Dragonslayer or Winged Hussar, more for the armor than because he looks good.

Jarvan IV bunny: 19

Uh he has a face. So I guess that’s nice. I literally have like no opinion on him. I guess Warring Kingdoms is the most attractive cus it has a nice stoic vibe.

birb: 16

I feel like without his ridiculous armor he would look okay. Sort of like the all-American soldier type vibe? Darkforge is his best skin because his armor actually looks pretty cool.

14. Lee Sin - Average rank: 18 bunny: 17

Lee Sin can’t see so his other sense are probably heightened. Every girl wants a guy that’ll listen to her for once. Traditional Lee Sin is the most attractive because he actually has hair.

birb: 19

Does the blindfold add appeal? Maybe. Traditional Lee Sin is his best look because he has hair.

15. Two-way tie - Average rank: 21

Taric bunny: 22

It’s hard to be attracted to someone else’s man. I also don’t think I could make him swing my way. Armor of the Fifth Age has the best smirk going on, so it’s definitely my favorite.

birb: 20

Off limits, can’t compete with Ezreal. He definitely looks like Fabio, though, and he’s popular on romance novels. My pick is Pool Party Taric, because it looks like he’s starring in Baywatch.

Gangplank bunny: 21

He’s a pirate so maybe he would get some booty, but not this booty. Too much beard and too rugged. Probably has scurvy. At least in Special Forces he looks a little bit younger and more tame.

birb: 21

The edgy makeover definitely gave him some positive points as compared to his old goofy pirate character. Still, he looks kinda old. Captain Gangplank is my fave because it looks like he’ll kill me if I say otherwise.

16. Two-way tie - Average rank: 23.5

Tryndamere bunny: 24

He’s a little up from the very bottom because at least his hair is on his head and not his face. But his muscles are also scary. I like Viking Trynd just because he’s surrounded by money and I’m attracted to money.

birb: 23

A straight-up ragemonster. I’d classify this guy as more of a beast than a man. He’s most attractive as King Tryndamere, because I can actually look at him like a human bean.

Udyr bunny: 23

I’m not really that into hobos. Udyr is like that guy who spent too much time in the forest and now thinks he’s magic. Definitely Not Udyr is the most attractive cus it’s the closest to not Udyr.

birb: 24

I feel like I wouldn’t be surprised seeing Udyr walking out of a dumpster. Best skin is Spirit Guard because he actually looks respectable (and because that skin costs a lot of money.)

17. Olaf - Average rank: 25 bunny: 25

There’s just so much hair!!!! And his muscles are bulging in a weird way. Brolaf maybe is the most attractive? It has the least amount of hair and alcohol.

birb: 25

Olaf is like a hairier version of Tryndamere, except he doesn’t even have a single respectable skin. His one arm muscle is like bigger than my whole body. Butcher Olaf is the most attractive, because I like meat.

18. Gragas - Average rank: 26 bunny: 26

Uh yeah. He’s just not good looking. He has so much hair and his nose is so red. God I don’t know. Oktoberfest is the most attractive, if I have to pick?

birb: 26

Alcoholic and literally a circle with limbs. Judging by his VO, he wouldn’t even pay for drinks if you went out with him. Best skin is Scuba, because it’s the one where his face is the most covered and also there’s a possibility that he will drown.

And that’s the end of our petty list! We’ll probably rank the League girls sometime in the future, but that’s for another day.

~Stay tuned for nonsense~

- bunny & birb

#laughing so hard at some of the differences in the rankings #vlad will always be my number one #thisisbunnyinthetags #thursday #league of legends #spicy #ranking #bunny #birb #league champions #league men #male champions #talon #text post #long post #collaboration post #collab #hot league men #best champions

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