#twife update

[twifeordeath]

Twife or Death: Lesbian Twilight Chapter 18

Updated as of 11-25-18 (previous) (all chapters)

All rights belong to Stephenie Meyer, and this project is non-profit and fan entertainment. Thank you to Shelley, Taya, and the project admin Alina G.

18. THE HUNT

They emerged one by one from the forest edge, ranging a dozen meters apart. The first vampire into the clearing fell back immediately, allowing another to take the front, orienting herself around the tall, dark-haired woman in a manner that clearly displayed who led the pack. The third emerged not long after; from this distance, all I could see of her was that her hair was a startling shade of red. I half turned to see Carine and Esme approaching from the forest’s edge.

Noticing my look of surprise Edythe whispered into my ear, “Julie called them, just in case.”

They closed ranks before continuing cautiously toward Edythe's family, exhibiting the respect of a troop of predators as it encounters a larger, unfamiliar group of its own kind. Or so my overactive imagination informed me.

As they approached, I could see how different they were from the Cullens. Their walk was catlike, a gait that seemed constantly on the edge of shifting into a crouch. They dressed in the ordinary gear of backpackers: jeans and casual button-down shirts in heavy, weatherproof fabrics. The clothes were frayed, though, with wear, and they were barefoot. The redhead’s brilliant orange hair was filled with leaves and debris from the woods; the other two had cropped their hair short.

Their sharp eyes carefully took in the more polished, urbane stance of Carine, who, flanked by Eleanor and Jasper, stepped guardedly forward to meet them. Without any seeming communication between them, they each straightened into a more casual, erect bearing.

The woman in front was easily the most beautiful, her skin olive-toned beneath the typical ashen pallor, her hair a glossy black. She was of a medium build, hard-muscled, of course, but nothing next to Eleanor's brawn. She smiled an easy smile, exposing a flash of gleaming white teeth.

The redhead was wilder, her eyes shifting restlessly between the women facing her, and the loose grouping around me, her chaotic hair quivering in the slight breeze. Her posture was distinctly feline. The last hovered unobtrusively behind them, slighter than the leader, her black hair and Asian features both nondescript. Her eyes, though completely still, somehow seemed the most vigilant.

Their eyes were different, too. Not the gold or black I had come to expect, but a deep burgundy color that was disturbing and sinister. The dark-haired woman, still smiling, stepped toward Carine.

"We thought we heard a game," she said in a relaxed voice with the slightest of French accents. "I'm Laurent, these are Victoria and Jamie." She gestured to the vampires beside her.

"I'm Carine. This is my family, Eleanor and Jasper, Rosalie, Esme and Alice, Edythe and Bella." She pointed us out in groups, deliberately not calling attention to individuals. I felt a bit of a shock when she said my name.

"Do you have room for a few more players?" Laurent asked sociably. Carine matched Laurent's friendly tone.

"Actually, we were just finishing up. But we'd certainly be interested another time. Are you planning to stay in the area for long?"

"We're headed north, in fact, but we were curious to see who was in the neighborhood. We haven't run into any company in a long time."

"No, this region is usually empty except for us and the occasional visitor, like yourselves."

The tense atmosphere had slowly subsided into a casual conversation; I guessed that Jasper was using her peculiar gift to control the situation.

"What's your hunting range?" Laurent casually inquired.

Carine ignored the assumption behind the inquiry. "The Olympic Range here, up and down the Coast Ranges on occasion. We keep a permanent residence nearby. There's another permanent settlement like ours up near Denali."

Laurent rocked back on her heels slightly.

"Permanent? How do you manage that?" There was honest curiosity in her voice.

"Why don't you come back to our home with us and we can talk comfortably?" Carine invited. "It's a rather long story."

Jamie and Victoria exchanged a surprised look at the mention of the word "home," but Laurent controlled her expression better.

"That sounds very interesting, and welcome." Her smile was genial. "We've been on the hunt all the way down from Ontario, and we haven't had the chance to clean up in a while." Her eyes moved appreciatively over Carine's refined appearance.

"Please don't take offense, but we'd appreciate it if you'd refrain from hunting in this immediate area. We have to stay inconspicuous, you understand," Carine explained.

"Of course." Laurent nodded. "We certainly won't encroach on your territory. We just ate outside of Seattle, anyway," she laughed. A shiver ran up my spine.

"We'll show you the way if you'd like to run with us — Eleanor and Alice, you can go with Edythe and Bella to get the Jeep," she casually added.

Three things seemed to happen simultaneously while Carine was speaking. My hair ruffled with the light breeze, Edythe stiffened, and the quiet woman, Jamie, suddenly whipped her head around, scrutinizing me, her nostrils flaring.

A swift rigidity fell on all of them as Jamie lurched one step forward into a crouch. Edythe bared her teeth, crouching in defense, a feral snarl ripping from her throat.

It was nothing like the playful sounds I'd heard from her before; it was the single most menacing thing I had ever heard, and chills ran from the crown of my head to the back of my heels.

"What's this?" Laurent exclaimed in open surprise. Neither Jamie nor Edythe relaxed their aggressive poses. Jamie feinted slightly to the side, and Edythe shifted in response.

"She's with us." Carine's firm rebuff was directed toward Jamie. Laurent seemed to catch my scent less powerfully than Jamie, but awareness now dawned on her face.

"You brought a snack?" she asked, her expression incredulous as she took an involuntary step forward.

Edythe snarled even more ferociously, harshly, her lip curling high above her glistening, bared teeth. Laurent stepped back again.

"I said she's with us," Carine corrected in a hard voice.

"But she's human," Laurent protested. The words were not at all aggressive, merely astounded.

"Yes." Eleanor was very much in evidence at Carine's side, her eyes on Jamie. Jamie slowly straightened out of her crouch, but her eyes never left me, her nostrils still wide. Edythe stayed tensed like a lion in front of me.

When Laurent spoke, her tone was soothing — trying to defuse the sudden hostility. "It appears we have a lot to learn about each other."

"Indeed." Carine's voice was still cool.

"But we'd like to accept your invitation." Her eyes flicked toward me and back to Carine. "And, of course, we will not harm the human girl. We won't hunt in your range, as I said."

Jamie glanced in disbelief and aggravation at Laurent and exchanged another brief look with Victoria, whose eyes still flickered edgily from face to face.

Carine measured Laurent's open expression for a moment before she spoke. "We'll show you the way. Jasper, Rosalie, Esme?" she called. They gathered together, blocking me from view as they converged. Alice was instantly at my side, and Eleanor fell back slowly, her eyes locked on Jamie as she backed toward us.

"Let's go, Bella." Edythe's voice was low and worried.

This whole time I'd been rooted in place, terrified into absolute immobility. Edythe had to grip my elbow to break my trance. Alice and Eleanor were close behind us, hiding me. I stumbled alongside Edythe, still stunned with fear. I couldn't hear if the main group had left yet. Edythe's anxiety was almost tangible as we moved at human speed to the forest edge.

Once we were into the trees, Edythe paused for a moment, stretching her arms out towards me, silently asking if she could pick me up. I gulped then nodded and she picked me up, bridal style, effortlessly. I wrapped my arms around her neck as she took off, the others close on her heels. I tucked my head into her chest but my eyes wouldn’t close. The sisters plunged through the now-black forest like wraiths. The sense of exhilaration that usually seemed to possess Edythe as she ran was completely absent, replaced by a fear that consumed her and drove her still faster. Even with me in her arms, the others trailed behind.

We reached the Jeep in an impossibly short time, and Edythe barely slowed as she carefully placed me in the backseat. She took a moment to run her hand down my hair, a gesture that I think was meant to calm us both, and only partially succeeded.

"Strap her in," she said to Eleanor, who slid in beside me.

Alice was already in the front seat, and Edythe was starting the engine. It roared to life and we swerved backward, spinning around to face the winding road.

Edythe was muttering something too low for me to understand, but it sounded a lot like a string of curses.

The jolting trip was much worse this time, and the darkness only made it more frightening. Eleanor and Alice both stared watchfully out the side windows.

We hit the main road, and though our speed increased, I could see much better where we were going. And we were headed south, away from Forks.

"We have to get you away from here — far away — now." She didn't look back, her eyes on the road. The speedometer read a hundred and five miles an hour.

"Turn around! You have to take me home!" I shouted. I struggled with the stupid harness, tearing at the straps.

“Bella, please don’t do this.” Edythe flashed a look back at me, half fear, half concern at my violent response.

Alice spoke so quietly I almost didn’t hear her. “Pull over Edythe.”

Edythe took in a deep breath and slowed the car to a stop on the side of the road, cradling her head in her hands and starting to shake. “You don't understand, she’s a tracker. Alice, did you see that? She’s a tracker!”

I felt Eleanor stiffen next to me, and I wondered at her reaction to the word. It meant something more to the three of them than it did to me; I wanted to understand, but there was no opening for me to ask.

"Listen to me, Alice. I saw Jamie’s mind. Tracking is her passion, her obsession — and she wants her, Alice — her, specifically. She begins the hunt tonight."

"She doesn't know where —"

She interrupted her. "How long do you think it will take her to cross her scent in town? Her plan was already set before the words were out of Laurent's mouth."

I gasped, knowing where my scent would lead. "Charlie! You can't leave her there! You can't leave her!" I thrashed against the harness.

“Bella please, you’ll hurt yourself.” The look of conflicted guilt on Edythe’s face stilled my panicked motions instantly.

"We have to take her back," Eleanor finally spoke.

"No." It sounded more like a plea than a statement.

"She's no match for us, Edythe. She won't be able to touch her."

"She'll wait."

Eleanor smiled. "I can wait, too."

"You didn't see — you don't understand. Once she commits to a hunt, she's unshakable. We'd have to kill her."

Eleanor didn't seem upset by the idea. "That's an option."

"And the redhead. She's with her. If it turns into a fight, the leader will go with them, too."

"There are enough of us."

"There's another option," Alice said quietly.

Edythe turned on her in outright panic, her voice rising. "There — is — no — other — option!"

Eleanor and I both stared at her in shock, but Alice seemed unsurprised. The silence lasted for a long minute as Edythe and Alice stared each other down.

I broke it. "Does anyone want to hear my plan?"

Edythe shook her head, but I couldn’t tell if it was an answer to my question or as a general response to the insanity of the situation.

"You take me back. I tell my dad I want to go home to Phoenix. I pack my bags. We wait till this tracker is watching, and then we run. She'll follow us and leave Charlie alone. Charlie won't call the FBI on your family. Then you can take me any damned place you want."

She just stared at me. “I’m sorry Bella- I got so anxious I didn’t listen to you at all. I think I know best because I can tell what people’s intentions are but I forget that I don’t have to think of the solution alone.”

"It might work — and we simply can't leave her mother unprotected. You know that," Alice said.

Everyone looked at Edythe.

"But it’s still too dangerous — I don't want Jamie within a hundred miles of Bella."

Eleanor was supremely confident. "Edythe, she's not getting through us."

Alice thought for a minute. "I don't see her attacking. She'll try to wait for us to leave her alone."

"It won't take long for her to realize that's not going to happen."

"Could you just take me home? Please?" I said in a much smaller voice.

She didn't look up. When she spoke, her voice sounded worn. "You're leaving tonight, whether the tracker sees or not. You can tell Charlie that you can't stand another minute in Forks. Tell her whatever story works. Pack the first things your hands touch, and then get in your truck. I can give you fifteen minutes. Is that okay?" I nod numbly as I try to think of what I’ll say to Charlie.

The Jeep rumbled to life, and she spun us around, the tires squealing. The needle on the speedometer started to race up the dial.

A few minutes passed in silence, other than the roar of the engine. Then Edythe spoke again.

"Alright. When we get to the house, if the tracker is not there, I will walk Bella to the door. Then she has fifteen minutes." She glanced at me in the rearview mirror. "Eleanor, you take the outside of the house. Alice, you get the truck. I'll be inside as long as she is. After she's out, you two can take the Jeep home and tell Carine."

"No way," Eleanor broke in. "I'm with you."

"Think it through, Eleanor. I don't know how long I'll be gone."

"Until we know how far this is going to go, I'm with you."

Edythe sighed. "If the tracker is there," she continued grimly, "we keep driving."

"We're going to make it there before her," Alice said confidently. Edythe thanked her, looking a bit relieved.

"What are we going to do with the Jeep?" She asked.

"Can you drive it home?”

"No," she said calmly.

"I think you should let me go alone," I said, even more quietly, then as soon as the words were out I realized how stupid it sounded.

She heard that.

"Bella, please just- trust me?” She ran a hands through her hair and I could see it was still shaking.

"Listen, Charlie's a bit careless, but she’s smart," I protested. "If you're not in town tomorrow, she's going to get suspicious."

"That's irrelevant. We'll make sure she's safe, and that's all that matters."

"Then what about this tracker? She saw the way you acted tonight. She's going to think you're with me, wherever you are."

"Edythe, listen to her," Eleanor urged. "I think she's right."

"Yes, she is," Alice agreed.

"I can't do that." Edythe's voice was rising in panic again.

"Eleanor should stay, too," I continued. "She definitely got an eyeful of Eleanor."

"What?" Eleanor turned on me.

"You'll get a better crack at her if you stay," Alice agreed.

Edythe stared at her blankly. "You think I should let her go alone?"

"Of course not," Alice said. "Jasper and I will take her."

"I can't do that," Edythe repeated, but this time there was a trace of defeat in her voice. The logic was working on her.

I tried to be persuasive. "Hang out here for a week —" I saw her expression in the mirror and amended "— a few days. Let Charlie see you haven't kidnapped me, and lead this Jamie on a wild-goose chase. Make sure she's completely off my trail. Then come and meet me. Take a roundabout route, of course, and then Jasper and Alice can go home."

I could see her considering it.

"Meet you where?"

"Phoenix." Of course.

"No. She'll hear that's where you're going," She said impatiently.

"And you'll make it look like that's a ruse, obviously. She'll know that we'll know that she's listening. She'll never believe I'm actually going where I say I am going."

"She's diabolical," Eleanor chuckled.

"And if that doesn't work?"

"There are several million people in Phoenix," I informed her.

"It's not that hard to find a phone book."

"I won't go home."

"Oh, dumb question, sorry.”

"I'm quite old enough to get my own place."

"Edythe, we'll be with her," Alice reminded her. Eleanor tapped her chin, thinking.

"Look, if we try to take her down while she's still around, there's a much better chance that someone will get hurt — she'll get hurt, or you will, trying to protect her. Now, if we get her alone…" She trailed off with a slow smile. I was right.

The Jeep was crawling slowly along now as we drove into town. Despite my brave talk, I could feel the hairs on my arms standing up. I thought about Charlie, alone in the house, and tried to be courageous.

"Bella." Edythe's voice was very soft. Alice and Eleanor looked out their windows. "If anything happens to you I won’t be able to forgive myself.”

"Remember, you’re keeping me safe by staying. Don’t you trust Alice?” I did.

She turned to Alice. "Can Jasper handle this?"

"Give her some credit, Edythe. She's been doing very, very well, all things considered." Alice rolled her eyes.

"This is a lot of responsibility on you-”

“Oh stop stalling we can handle it. I know this plan isn’t the most airtight but we can improvise. I’ll hopefully be able to see what’s going on with you guys and keep an eye on the rogues as well.” Alice sounded completely confident. Edythe stared into her eyes and whatever she saw there, or in her mind, must’ve been enough because she took in another deep breath and nodded slowly.

A/N: hope I got all the weird stuff! thanks for reading. and for the anons/emojis

[twifeordeath]

Twife or Death: Lesbian Twilight Chapter 24

Updated as of (9-14-2021) (previous) (all chapters)

All rights belong to Stephenie Meyer, and this project is non-profit and fan entertainment.

—————————–

24. CHANGE

I ended up changing my mind.

The fire in my arm wasn’t really so bad—the worst thing I’d ever felt up to that point, yes. But not the same as my entire body on fire.

I begged her to make it stop. I told her that this was really all I wanted. For the burning to stop. Nothing else.

I heard Alice telling her that everyone had said the same thing—reminding her that she’d begged Carine to kill her, too. Telling her my first decision was the one that counted.

I remember at one point screaming at her to shut up.

I think she apologized.

But mostly it was hard to pay attention to what was happening outside the fire. I know they moved me. It seemed like I was on the bloody, vomit-covered wood floor for a long time, but it was hard to judge how the minutes passed. Sometimes Carine would say something and it would feel like a year had passed before Alice answered her, but it was probably just the fire that made the seconds into years.

And then someone carried me. I saw the sun for another year-long second—it looked pale and cool. Then everything was dark. It was dark for a long time.

I could still see Edythe. She held me in her arms, my face near hers, one of her hands on my cheek. Julie was nearby, too. I think she had my legs.

When I screamed, she apologized, over and over again. I tried not to scream. It didn’t do any good. There was no relief, no release in it. The fire didn’t care what I did. It just burned.

When my eyes were in focus, I could see dim lights moving across Edythe’s face, though all around her head it was just black. Aside from her voice and mine, the only sound was a deep, constant thrumming. Sometimes it got louder, and then it was quiet again.

I didn’t realize I was back in the black car until it stopped. I didn’t hear the door open, but the sudden flash of light was blinding. I must have recoiled from it, because Edythe crooned in my ear.

“We’re just stopping to refill the gas tank. We’ll be home soon, Bella. You’re doing so well. This will be over soon. I am so sorry.”

I couldn’t feel her hand against my face—it should have been cool, but nothing was cool anymore. I tried to reach for it, but I couldn’t exactly tell what my limbs were doing. I think I was thrashing some, but Edythe and Julie kept me contained. Edythe guessed what I wanted. She grabbed my hand and held it to her lips. Julie took my other one. I wished I could feel it. I tried to grip their hands without knowing how to make the muscles move, or being able to feel them. Maybe I got it right. They didn’t let go.

It got darker. Eventually, I couldn’t see either of them anymore. It was black as ink inside the car—there was no difference between having my eyes open or closed. I started to panic. The fire made the night like a sensory deprivation chamber; I couldn’t feel anything but pain—not the seat beneath me, not Julie restraining my legs, not Edythe holding my head, my hand. I was all alone with the burning, and I was terrified.

I don’t know what I must have gasped out—my voice was totally gone now, either raw from screaming or burned past usability, I couldn’t guess which—but Edythe’s voice was in my ear again.

“I’m right here, Bella. You’re not alone. I won’t leave you. I will be here. Listen to my voice. I’m here with you.…”

Her voice calmed me—made the panic go away, if not the pain. I listened, keeping my breathing shallow so I could hear her better. I didn’t need to scream anymore. The burning only got more and never less, but I was adapting. It was all I could feel, but not all I could think about.

“I never wanted this for you, Bella,” Edythe continued. “I would give anything to take this away. I’ve made so many mistakes. I should have stayed away from you, from the first day. I should never have come back again. I’ve destroyed your life, I’ve taken everything from you.…” It sounded like she was sobbing again.

“No,” I tried to say, but I’m not sure if I even shaped the word with my mouth.

“She’s probably far enough along that she'll remember this,” Alice said softly.

“I hope so,” Edythe said, her voice breaking.

“I’m just saying, you might use the time more productively. There is so much she doesn’t know.”

“You’re right, you’re right.” She sighed. “Where do I begin?”

“You could explain about being thirsty,” Alice suggested. “That was the hardest part, when I first woke up. And we’ll be expecting a lot from her.”

When Edythe answered, it was like she was spitting the words through her teeth. “I won’t hold her to that. She didn’t choose this. She’s free to become whatever she wants to be.”

“Hah,” Alice said. “You know her better than that, Edythe. The other way won’t be good enough for her. Do you see? She’ll be fine.”

It was quiet while she tuned in to whatever Alice was seeing inside her head. Though I understood the silence, it still left me alone in the fire. I started panicking again.

“I’m here, Bella, I’m here. Don’t be afraid.” She took a deep breath. “I’ll keep talking. There are so many things to tell you. The first one is that when this passes, when you’re… new, you won’t be exactly the same as I am, not in the very beginning. Being a young vampire means certain things, and the hardest to ignore is the thirst. You’ll be thirsty—all the time. You won’t be able to think about much else for a while. Maybe a year, maybe two. It’s different for everyone. As soon as this is over, I’ll take you hunting. You wanted to see that, didn’t you? We’ll bring Eleanor so you can see her bear impression—” She laughed once, a damaged little sound. “If you decide—if you want to live like us, it will be hard. Especially in the beginning. It might be too hard, and I understand that. We all do. If you want to try it my way, I’ll go with you. I can tell you who the human monsters are. There are options. Whatever you want. If… if you don’t want me with you, I’ll understand that, too, Bella. I swear I won’t follow you if you tell me not to—”

“No,” I gasped. I heard myself that time, so I knew I’d done it right.

“You don’t have to make any more decisions now. There’s time for that. Just know that I will respect any decision you make.” She took another deep breath. “I should probably warn you about your eyes. They won’t be blue anymore.” Another half-sob. “But don’t let them frighten you. They won’t stay so bright for long.

“I suppose that’s a very small thing, though.… I should focus on the most important things. The hard things—the very worst thing. Oh, I’m so sorry, Bella. You can’t see your father or mother again. It’s not safe. You would hurt them—you wouldn’t be able to help yourself. And… there are rules. Rules that, as your creator, I’m bound by. We’d both be held responsible if you ran out of control. Oh—” Her breath caught. “There’s so much she doesn’t know, Alice.”

“We’ve got time, Edythe. Just relax. Take it slow.”

I heard her inhale again.

“The rules,” she said. “One rule with a thousand different permutations—the reality of vampires must be kept secret. That means newborn vampires must be controlled. I will teach you—we’ll keep you safe, I promise.” Another sigh. “And you can’t tell anyone what you are. I broke that rule. I didn’t think it could hurt you—that anyone would ever find out. I should have known that just being near you would eventually destroy you. I should have known I would ruin your life—that I was lying to myself about any other path being possible. I’ve done everything wrong—”

“You’re letting self-castigation get in the way of information again, Edythe.” It was Julie this time, her voice strained but a note of dry amusement remained.

“Right, right.” A deep breath. “Bella. Do you remember the painting in Carine’s study—the nighttime patrons of the arts I told you about? They’re called the Volturi—they are… for the lack of a better word, the police of our world. I’ll tell you more about them in a bit—you just need to know that they exist, so that I can explain why you can’t tell Charlie or your mother where you are. You can’t talk to them again, Bella.” Her voice was straining higher, like it was about to fracture. “It’s best… we don’t have much choice but to let them think you’re dead. I’m so sorry. You didn’t even get to say goodbye. It’s not fair!”

There was a long pause while I could hear her breath hitching.

“Why don’t you go back to the Volturi?” Alice suggested. “Keep emotion out of it.”

“You’re right,” she repeated in a whisper. “Ready to learn a new world history, Bella?”

She talked all night without a break, until the sun came up and I could see her face again. She told me stories that sounded like dark fairy tales. I was beginning to grasp the edges of how big this world was, but I knew it would be a long time before I totally comprehended the size of it.

She told me about the people I’d seen in the painting with Carine, the Volturi. How they’d joined forces during the Mycenaean age, and begun a millennia-long campaign to create peace and order in the vampire world. How there had been six of them in the beginning. How betrayal and murder had cut them in half. Someone named Ara had murdered her sister, her best friend’s wife. The best friend was Marcella, she was the woman I’d seen standing with Carine. Ara’s own wife Sulpicia, the one with all the masses of dark hair in the painting, had been the only witness. She’d turned her over to Marcella and their soldiers. There had been some question of what to do—Ara had a very powerful extra gift, like what Edythe had, but more, she said—and the Volturi weren’t sure they’d be able to succeed without her. But Sulpicia searched out a young girl, Mele, the one Edythe had called a servant and a thief, who had a gift of her own. She could absorb another vampire’s gift. She couldn’t use that stolen gift herself, but she could give it to someone else who she was touching. Sulpicia had Mele took Ara’s gift, and then Marcella executed her. Once she had her wife’s gift, Sulpicia found out that another in their group, Caius, was in on the plot. She was executed, too, and her wife, Athenodora, joined with Sulpicia and Marcella to lead their soldiers. They overthrew the vampires who terrorized Europe, and then the ones who enslaved Egypt. Once they were in charge, they made regulations that kept the vampire world hidden and safe.

I listened as much as I could. It wasn’t a distraction from the pain—there was no escape. But it was better to think about than the fire.

Edythe said the Volturi were the ones who’d made up all the stories about crosses and holy water and mirrors. Over the centuries, they made all reports of vampires into myth. And now they continued to keep it that way. Vampires would stay in the shadows… or there would be consequences.

So I couldn’t go to Charlie’s house and let her see the eyes that Edythe said would be so bright. I couldn’t drive to Florida and hug my mom and let her know that I wasn’t dead. I couldn’t even call her and explain the confusing message I’d left on her answering machine. If there was anything in the news, if any rumor spread that something unnatural was involved, the Volturi soldiers might come to investigate.

I had to disappear quietly.

The fire hurt more than hearing these things. But I knew that wouldn’t always be the way it was. Soon, this would hurt the most.

Edythe moved on quickly, telling me about their friends in Canada who lived the same way. Three blonde Russian sisters and two Spanish vampires who were the Cullens’ closest family. She told me that two of them had extra powers—Nadezhda could do something electrical, and Elena knew the talents of every vampire she met.

She told me about other friends, all over the world. In Ireland and Brazil and Egypt. So many names. Eventually Alice stepped in again and told her to prioritize.

Edythe told me that I would never age. That I would always be seventeen, like she was. That the world would change around me, and I would remember all of it, never forgetting one second.

She told me how the Cullens lived—how they moved from cloudy place to cloudy place. Esme would restore a house for them. Alice would invest their assets with amazingly good returns. They would decide on a story to explain their relationships to each other, and Jasper would create new names and new documented pasts for each of them. Carine would take a job in a hospital with her new credentials, or she’d return to school to study a new field. If the location looked promising, the younger Cullens would pretend to be even younger than they were, so they could stay longer.

After my time as a new vampire was up, I would be able to go back to school. But my education wouldn’t have to wait. I had a lot of time ahead of me, and I would remember everything I read or heard.

I would never sleep again.

Food would be disgusting to me. I would never be hungry again, only thirsty.

I would never get sick. I would never feel tired.

I would be able to run faster than a race car. I’d be stronger than any other living species on the planet.

I wouldn’t need to breathe.

I would be able to see more clearly, hear even the smallest sound.

My heart would finish beating tomorrow or the next day, and it would never beat again.

I would be a vampire.

One good thing about the burning—it let me hear all this with some distance. It let me process what she was telling me without emotion. I knew the emotion would come later.

When it was starting to get dark again, our journey was over. Julie carried me into the house like I was a child, and they sat with me in the big room. The background behind Edythe’s face went from black to white. I could see them both much more clearly now, and I didn’t think it was just the light.

In her eyes, my face reflected back, and I was surprised to see that it looked like a face and not a charcoal briquette—though a face in anguish. Still, maybe I wasn’t the pile of ash I felt like.

She told me stories to fill the time, and the others took turns helping her. Julie told me myths she’d learned from her great grandmother, and bits of her family’s history that sounded more like legends, though she assured me they were true. Wolves remember. Not in the same way as vampires, obviously, but their stories were held sacred and passed orally down the generations.

Jasper told me her story after all. I guess she’d decided I was ready now. I was glad, when she did, that my emotions were mostly buried under the fire. She’d lost family, too, when the woman who created her stole her without warning. She told me about the army she’d belonged to, a life of carnage and death, and then breaking free. She told me about the day Alice had found her, how she’d started to let her find herself.

Esme told me how her life had ended before she'd killed herself, about her unstable, alcoholic wife and the daughter she'd loved more than her own soul. She told me about the night when her wife, in a drunken rampage, had jumped off a cliff with her little daughter in her arms, and how she hadn’t been able to do anything but follow after them. Then she told me how, after the pain, there had been the most beautiful woman in a nurse’s uniform—a nurse she recognized from a happier time in another place when she was just a young woman. A nurse who hadn’t aged at all.

Eleanor told me about being attacked by a bear, and then seeing an angel who took her to Carine instead of to heaven. She told me how she'd thought at first she’d been sent to hell—justly, she admitted—and then how she got into heaven after all.

She was the one who told me that the redhead had gotten away. She’d never come near Charlie after the one time that she'd searched Charlie’s house. When we’d all gotten back to Forks, she, Rosalie, and Jasper had followed Victoria’s trail as far as they could; it disappeared into the Salish Sea and they hadn’t been able to find the place where she came back out. For all they knew, she'd swum straight out to the Pacific and on to another continent. She must have assumed that Jamie had lost the fight and realized it was smarter to disappear.

Even Rosalie took a turn. She told me about a life consumed with vanity, with material things, with ambition. She told me about the only daughter of a powerful politician—exactly what kind of power she wielded, Rosalie hadn’t entirely understood—and how Rosalie had planned to marry her and become heir to the dynasty. How the beautiful daughter pretended to love her to please her mother, and then how she had watched when her lover from a rival criminal syndicate had Rosalie beaten to death, how she’d laughed aloud the whole time. She told me about the revenge she'd gotten. Rosalie was the least careful with her words. She told me about losing her family, and how none of this was worth what she'd lost.

Edythe had whispered Eleanor’s name; she'd growled once and left.

I think it must have been while Rosalie or Eleanor was talking that Alice watched Jamie’s video from the dance studio. When Rosalie was gone, Alice took her spot. At first I wasn’t sure what they were talking about, because only Edythe was speaking out loud, but eventually I caught up. Alice was searching right there on her laptop, trying to narrow down the options of where she'd been kept in her human life. I was glad she didn’t seem to mention anything else about the tape—the focus was all on her past. I was trying to remember how to use my voice so that I could stop her if she tried to say anything about the rest of it. I hoped Alice was smart enough to have destroyed the tape before Edythe could watch.

The stories helped me think of other things, prepare myself, while the fire burned, but I was only able to pay partial attention. My mind was cataloguing the fire, experiencing it in new ways. It was amazing how each inch of my skin, each millimeter, was so distinct. It was like I could feel all my cells burning individually. I could feel the difference between the pain in the walls of my lungs, and the way the fire felt in the soles of my feet, inside my eyeballs, and down my spine. All the different agonies clearly separated.

I could hear my heart thudding—it seemed so loud. Like it had been hooked to an amp. I could hear other things, too. Mostly Edythe’s and Julie’s voices, sometimes the others talking—though I couldn’t see them. I heard music once, but I didn’t know where it was coming from.

It seemed like I was on the couch, my head in Edythe’s lap, for several years. The lights stayed bright, so I didn’t know if it was night or day. But Edythe’s eyes were always gold, so I guessed that the fire was lying about the time again.

I was so aware of every nerve ending in my body that I knew it immediately when something changed.

It started with my toes. I couldn’t feel them. It seemed like the fire had finally won, that it had started burning off pieces of me. Edythe had said I was changing, not dying, but in this moment of panic I thought she’d gotten it wrong. Maybe this vampire thing wouldn’t work on me. Maybe all this burning had been just a slow way to die. The worst way.

Edythe felt me freaking out again, and she started humming in my ear. I tried to look at the positives. If it was killing me, at least it would be over. And if it was going to end, at least I was in Edythe’s arms for the rest of my life.

And then I realized that my toes were still there, they just weren’t burning anymore. In fact, the fire was pulling out of the soles of my feet, too. I was glad I’d made sense of what was happening, because my fingertips were next. No need for more panic, maybe a reason for hope. The fire was leaving.

Only it seemed to be doing more than leaving—it was… moving. All the fire that receded from my extremities seemed to be draining into the center of my body, stoking the blaze there so that it was hotter than before.

I couldn’t believe there was such a thing as hotter.

My heart—already so loud—starting beating faster. The core of the fire seemed to be centered there. It was sucking the flames in from my hands and my ankles, leaving them pain-free, but multiplying the heat and pain in my heart.

“Carine,” Edythe called.

Carine walked into the room, and the amazing part about that was that I heard her. Edythe and her family never made any noise when they moved. But now, if I listened, I could hear the low sound of Carine’s lips brushing together as she spoke.

“Ah. It’s almost over.”

I wanted to be relieved, but the growing agony in my chest made it impossible to feel anything else. I stared up at Edythe’s face. She was more beautiful than she had ever been, because I could see her better than I ever had. But I couldn’t really appreciate her. So much pain.

“Edythe?” I gasped.

“You’re all right, Bella. It’s ending. I’m sorry, I know. I remember.”

The fire ripped hotter through my heart, dragging the flames up from my elbows and knees. I thought about Edythe going through this, suffering this way, and it put a different perspective on my pain. She didn’t even know Carine then. She didn’t know what was happening to her. She hadn’t been held the whole time in the arms of someone she loved.

The pain was almost gone from everywhere but my chest. The only leftover was my throat, but it was a different kind of burn now… drier… irritating.…

I heard more footsteps, and I was pretty sure I could tell the difference between them. The decisive, confident step was Eleanor, I was positive. Alice was the quicker, more rhythmic motion. Esme was a little slower, thoughtful. Jasper was the one who stopped by the door. I thought I heard Rosalie breathing behind her.

And then—

“Aaah!”

My heart took off, beating like helicopter blades, the sound almost a single sustained note. It felt like it would grind through my ribs. The fire flared up in the center of my chest, sucking all the flames from the rest of my body to fuel the most painful burn yet. It was enough to stun me. My body bowed like the fire was dragging me upward by my heart.

It felt like a war inside me—my racing heart blitzing against the raging fire. They were both losing.

The fire constricted tighter, concentrating into one fist-sized ball of pain with a final, unbearable surge. The surge was answered by a deep, hollow-sounding thud. My heart stuttered twice, then thudded quietly again one more time.

There was no sound. No breathing. Not even mine.

For a second, all I could process was the absence of pain. The dull, dry afterburn in my throat was easy to ignore, because every other part of me felt amazing. The release was an incredible high.

I stared up at Edythe in wonder. I felt like I’d taken off a blindfold I’d been wearing all my life. What a view.

“Bella?” she asked. Now that I could really concentrate on it, the beauty of her voice was unreal.

“It’s disorienting, I know. You get used to it.”

Could you get used to hearing a voice like this? Seeing a face like that?

“Edythe,” I said, and the sound of my own voice jolted me. Was that me? It didn’t sound like me. It didn’t sound… human.

Unnerved, I reached out to touch her cheek. In the same instant that the desire to touch her entered my mind, my hand was cradling the side of her face. There was no in-between—no process of lifting my hand, watching it move to its destination. It was just there.

“Huh.”

She leaned into my touch, put her hand over mine, and held it against her face. It was strange because it was familiar—I’d always loved it when she’d done that, to see that she so obviously liked it when I touched her that way, that it meant something to her. But it was also nothing the same. Her face wasn’t cold anymore. Her hand felt right against mine. There was no difference between us now.

I stared into her eyes, then looked closer at the picture reflected in them.

“Ahh…” A little gasp escaped my throat by accident, and I felt my body lock down in surprise. It was weird—it felt like the natural thing to do, to be a statue because I was shocked.

“What is it, Bella?” She leaned closer, concerned, but that just brought the reflection closer.

“The eyes?” I breathed.

She sighed, and wrinkled her nose. “It goes away,” she promised. “I terrified myself every time I looked in a mirror for six months.”

“Six months,” I murmured. “And then they’ll be gold like yours?”

She looked away, over the back of the couch, to someone standing there behind us where I couldn’t see. I wanted to sit up and look around, but I was a little afraid to move. My body felt so strange.

“That depends on your diet, Bella,” Carine said calmly. “If you hunt like we do, your eyes will eventually turn this color. If not, your eyes will look like Laurent’s did.”

I decided to try sitting up.

And like before, thinking was doing. Without any movement, I was upright. Edythe kept my hand in hers as it left her face.

Behind the sofa, they were all there, watching. I’d been one hundred percent with my guesses—Carine closest, then Eleanor, Alice, and Esme. Jasper in the doorway to another room with Rosalie watching over her shoulder.

I looked at their faces, shocked again. If my brain hadn’t been so much… roomier than before, I would have forgotten what I was about to say. As it was, I recovered pretty fast.

“No, I want to do it your way,” I said to Carine. “That’s the right thing to do.”

Carine smiled. It would have knocked the breath out of me if I’d had to breathe.

“If only it were so easy. But that’s a noble choice. We’ll help you all we can.”

Edythe touched my arm. “We should hunt now, Bella. It will make your throat hurt less.”

When she mentioned my throat, the dry burn there was suddenly at the forefront of my mind. I swallowed. But…

“Hunt?” my new voice asked. “I, uh, well, I’ve never been hunting before. Not even like normal hunting with rifles, so I don’t really think I could… I mean, I have no idea how.…”

Eleanor chuckled under her breath.

Edythe smiled. “I’ll show you. It’s very easy, very natural. Didn’t you want to see me hunt?”

“Just us?” I checked.

She looked confused for a fraction of a second, and then her face was smooth. “Of course. Whatever you want. Come with me, Bella.”

And she was on her feet, still holding my hand. Then I was on my feet, too, and it was so simple to move, I wondered why I’d been afraid to try. Anything I wanted this body to do, it did.

Then I realized Julie wasn’t following. All at once, as I looked back at her, her vitality hit me. She was still breathing, her heart was beating- fast. I could hear her heart beating. It was fast but steady. She had dark splotches under her eyes, uneven and imperfect, and I could suddenly see every single freckle on her face and shoulders with crystal clear detail.

“Well? Aren’t you coming?” Edythe, of course, noticed my hesitation. There was another moment, Julie’s eyes flicked to mine, and I almost laughed.

“Of course you’re included in ‘us’.” I said, holding my other hand out to hers. And then she was right beside me, hand hot in mine. She burned like a fire, and there was something of that searing heat in her scent as well. Almost uncomfortable, but not quite.

We darted to the back wall of the big room—the glass wall that was a mirror now because it was night outside. I saw the three figures flashing by and I stopped. The strange thing was that when I stopped, it was so sudden that Edythe kept going, still holding my hand, and though she was still pulling, I didn’t move. My grip on her hand pulled her back. Like it was nothing.

But I was only noticing that with part of my brain. Mostly I was looking at my reflection.

I’d seen my face warped around the convex shape of her eyes, just the center, lacking the edges. I’d only really seen my eyes—brilliant, almost glowing red—and that had been enough to pull my focus. Now I saw my whole face—my neck, my arms.

If someone had cut an outline of my human self, this version would still fit into that space. But though I took up the same volume, all the angles were different. Harder, more pronounced. Like someone had made an ice sculpture of me and left the edges sharp.

My eyes—it was hard to look around the color, but the shape of them, too, seemed different. So vaguely, like I was remembering something I’d seen only through muddy water—I remembered how my eyes used to look. Undecided. Like I was never sure who I was. Then, after Edythe—still so hard to see in my memory, uncomfortable to try—they were suddenly more resolved.

These eyes had gone one step further than resolved—they were savage. If I walked into this self in a dark alley, I would be terrified of me.

Which was the point, I guess. People were supposed to be afraid of me now.

I still wore my bloodstained jeans, but I had an unfamiliar, pale blue shirt on. I didn’t remember that happening, but I could understand; vampire or human, no one wanted to hang around with someone drenched in vomit.

“Whoa,” I said. I locked eyes with Edythe in the reflection.

“It’s a lot,” she said.

I took a deep breath and nodded. “Okay.”

She pulled on my hand again, and I followed. Before a fourth of a second had passed, we were through the glass doors behind the stairs and on the back lawn.

There was no moon and no stars—the clouds were too thick. It should have been pitch-black outside the rectangle of light shining through the glass wall, but it wasn’t. I could see everything.

“Whoa,” I said again. “That is so cool.”

Edythe looked at me like she was surprised by my reaction. Had she forgotten what it was like the first time she saw the world through vampire eyes? I thought she’d said I wouldn’t forget things anymore.

“We’re going to have to go a ways out into the woods,” she told me. “Just in case.”

I remembered the gist of what she’d told me about hunting. “Right. So there aren’t any people around. Got it.”

Again—that same surprised look flashed across her face and then was gone.

“Follow me,” she said.

She whipped down the lawn so fast that I knew she would have been invisible to my old eyes. Then, at the edge of the river, she launched herself into a high arc that spun her over the river and into the trees beyond.

“Really?” I called after her.

I heard her laugh. “I promise, it’s easy.”

Great. I looked back at Julie, but she just crossed her arms with a small smile.

I sighed, then started running.

Running had never been my forte. I was all right on a flat track, if I was paying enough attention and I kept my eyes on my feet. Okay, honestly, even then I was still able to tangle my feet up and go down.

This was so different. I was flying—flying down the lawn, faster than I’d ever moved, but it was only too simple to put my feet exactly where they were supposed to go. I could feel all of my muscles, almost see the connections as they worked together, will them to do exactly what I needed. When I got to the edge of the river I didn’t even pause. I pushed off the same rock she’d used, and then I was really flying. The river slipped away behind me as I rocketed through the air. I passed where she’d landed and then fell down into the wood.

I felt an instant of panic when I realized I hadn’t even considered the landing, but then my hand already seemed to know how to catch a thick branch and angle my body so that my feet hit the ground with barely a sound.

“Holy crow,” I breathed in total disbelief.

I heard Edythe running through the trees, and already her gait was as familiar to me as the sound of my own breathing. I was sure I could tell the difference between the sound of her footfalls and anyone else’s. Julie’s was heavier, but just as swift. I’m sure I’d memorize that in time as well.

“We have to do that again!” I said as soon as I saw them.

Edythe paused a few feet away from me, and a frustrated expression that I knew well crossed her face.

I laughed. “What do you want to know? I’ll tell you what I’m thinking.”

She frowned. “I don’t understand. You’re… in a very good mood.” Julie scoffed but Edythe ignored her.

“Oh. Is that wrong?”

“Aren’t you incredibly thirsty?”

I swallowed against the burn. It was bad, but not as bad as the rest of the fire I’d just left behind. The thirst-burn was always there, and it got worse when I focused on it, but there were so many other things to focus on. “Yes, when I think about it.”

Edythe squared her shoulders. “If you want to do this first, that’s fine, too.”

I looked at her. I was obviously missing something. “Do this? Do what?”

She stared at me for a second, her eyes doubtful. Suddenly she threw her hands up. “You know, I really thought that when your mind was more similar to mine, I’d be able to hear it. I guess that’s never going to happen.”

“Sorry.”

She laughed, but there was an unhappy note in the sound. “Honestly, Bella.”

“Can you please give me a clue as to what we’re talking about?”

“You wanted us to be alone,” she said, like this was an explanation.

“Uh, yeah.”

“Because you had some things you wanted to say to me?” She braced her shoulders again, tensing like she was expecting something bad.

“Oh. Well, I guess there are things to say. I mean, there’s one important thing, but I wasn’t thinking about that.” Seeing how frustrated she was by whatever misunderstanding was happening, I was totally honest. “I wanted to be alone with you because… well, I didn’t want to be rude, but I also didn’t want to do this hunting thing in front of Eleanor,” I confessed. “I figured there was a good chance I would screw something up, and I don’t know Eleanor all that well yet, but I have a feeling she would find that pretty funny.”

Julie burst into almost soundless giggles, and I elbowed her reflexively, launching he ten feet to the side. After multiple apologies, more laughter, and lots of brushing of leaves and dirt off Julie’s leather jacket, Edythe turned to look at me again.

“You were afraid Eleanor would laugh at you? Really, that’s all?”

“Really. Your turn, Edythe. What did you think was happening?”

She hesitated. “I thought you were being polite. I thought you preferred to yell at me alone rather than in front of my family.”

I froze up again. I wondered if that was going to happen every time I was surprised. It took me a second to thaw out.

“Yell at you?” I repeated. “Edythe—oh! You’re talking about all that stuff you were saying in the car, right? Sorry about that, I—”

“Sorry? What on earth are you apologizing for now, Bella Swan?”

She looked angry. Angry and so beautiful. I couldn’t guess why she was worked up. I shrugged. “I wanted to tell you then, but I couldn’t. I mean, I couldn’t even really concentrate—”

“Of course you couldn’t concentrate—”

“Edythe!” I crossed the space between us in one invisibly fast stride and put my hands on her shoulders. “You’ll never know what I’m thinking if you keep interrupting me.”

The anger on her face faded as she deliberately calmed herself. Then she nodded.

“You know what? I’m going to let you two work this out. Call me when you’re done.” Julie says with an amused huff, and I give her a nod. “Edythe- stop being so melodramatic. Remember what we talked about?”

Edythe bares her teeth in a very animalistic growl, but that only seems to make Julie smile wider before she disappears into the trees.

“Okay,” I said. “In the car—I wanted to tell you then that you didn’t need to apologize, I felt horrible that you were so sad. This isn’t your fault—”

She started to say something, so I put my finger over her lips.

“And it isn’t all bad,” I continued. “I’m… well, my head is still spinning and I know there are a million things to think about and I’m sad, of course, but I’m also good, Edythe. I’m always good when I’m with you.”

She stared at me for a long minute. Slowly, she raised her hand to pull my finger away from her mouth. I didn’t stop her.

“You aren’t angry at me for what I’ve done to you?” she asked quietly.

“Edythe, you saved my life! Again. Why would I be angry? Because of the way you saved it? What else could you have done?”

She exhaled, almost like she was mad again. “How can you…? Bella, you have to see that this is all my fault. I haven’t saved your life, I’ve taken it from you. Charlie—Renée—”

I put my finger over her mouth again, and then took a deep breath. “Yes. It’s hard, and it’s going to be hard for a long time. Maybe forever, right? But why would I put that on you? Jamie is the one who… well, who killed me. You brought me back to life.”

She pushed my hand down. “If I hadn’t involved you in my world—”

I laughed, and she looked up at me like I’d lost my mind. “Edythe—if you hadn’t involved me in your world, Charlie and Renée would have lost me three months earlier.”

She stared, frowning. It was obvious she wasn’t accepting any of this.

“Do you remember what I said when you saved my life in Port Angeles? The second time, or third.” I barely did. The words were easier to bring back than the images. I knew it went something like this. “That you were messing with fate because my number was up? Well… if I had to die, Edythe… isn’t this the most amazing way to do it?”

A long minute passed while she stared at me, and then she shook her head. “Bella, you are amazing.”

“I guess I am now.”

“You always have been.”

I didn’t say anything, and my face gave me away. Or she was just that good. She knew my face so well, she spent so much time trying so hard to understand me, that she knew immediately when there was something I wasn’t saying.

“What is it, Bella?”

“Just… something Jamie said.” I winced. Though it was hard to see things in my old memory, the dance studio was the most recent, the most vivid.

Edythe’s jaw got hard. “She said a lot of things,” she hissed.

“Oh.” Suddenly I wanted to punch something. But I also didn’t want to let go of Edythe to do that. “You saw the tape.”

Her face was totally white. Furious and agonized at the same time. “Yes, I saw the tape.”

“When? I didn’t hear—”

“Headphones.”

“I wish you hadn’t—”

She shook her head. “I had to. But forget that now. Which lie were you thinking of?” She spit the words through her teeth.

It took me a minute. “You didn’t want me to be a vampire.”

“No, I absolutely did not.”

“So that part wasn’t a lie. And you’ve been so upset.… I know you feel bad about Charlie and my mom, but I guess I’m worried that part of it is because, well, you didn’t expect to have me around very long, you weren’t planning for that—” Her mouth flew open so fast that I put my whole hand over it. “Because if that’s what it is, don’t worry. If you want me to go away after a while, I can. You can show me what to do so I won’t get either of us in trouble. I don’t expect you to put up with me forever. You didn’t choose this any more than I did. I want you to know that I’m aware of that.”

She waited for me to move my hand. I did it slowly. I wasn’t sure I wanted to hear what was next.

She growled softly and flashed her teeth at me—not in a smile.

“You’re lucky I didn’t bite you,” she said. “The next time you put your hand on my mouth to say something so completely idiotic—and insulting—I will.”

“Sorry.”

She closed her eyes. Her arms wrapped around my waist and she leaned her head against my chest. My arms wound around her automatically. She tilted her face up so that she could look at me.

“I want you to listen to me very carefully, Bella. This—having you with me, getting to keep you here—it’s like I’ve been granted every selfish wish I’ve ever had. But the price for everything I want was to take the exact same thing away from you. All of your life. I’m angry with myself, I’m disappointed in myself. And I wish so much that I could bring that tracker back to life so that I could kill her myself, over and over and over again.…

“The reason I didn’t want you to be a vampire wasn’t because you weren’t special enough—it was because you are too special and you deserve more. I wanted you to have what we all miss—a human life. But you have to know, if it were only about me, if there were no price for you to pay, then tonight would be the best night of my life. I’ve been staring forever in the face for a century, and tonight is the very first time it’s looked beautiful to me. Because of you.

“Don’t you ever again think that I don’t want you. I will always want you. I don’t deserve you, but I will always love you. Are we clear?”

It was obvious that she was being totally sincere. Truth echoed in every word.

A huge grin spread across my new face. “So that’s okay, then.”

She smiled back. “I’d say so.”

“That was the one important thing I wanted to say—just, I love you. I always will. I knew that from pretty early in. So, with that being how things are, I think we can work the rest out.”

I held her face in my hands and bent down to kiss her. Like everything else, this was so easy now. Nothing to worry about, no hesitation.

It felt strange, though, that my heart wasn’t beating out a crazy drum solo, that the blood wasn’t stampeding through my veins. But something was zinging through me like electricity, every nerve in my body alive. More than alive—like all of my cells were rejoicing. I only wanted to hold her like this and I would need nothing else for the next hundred years.

But she broke away, and she was laughing. This time her laugh was full of joy. It sounded like singing.

“How are you doing this?” she laughed. “You’re supposed to be a newborn vampire and here you are, discussing the future calmly with me, smiling at me, kissing me! You’re supposed to be thirsty and nothing else.”

“I’m a lot of else,” I said. “But I am pretty thirsty, now that you mention it.”

She leaned up on her toes and kissed me once, hard. “I love you. Let’s go hunt.”

“Julie! Come join us!” I called out, marveling at the strength and clarity of my voice. A wolf bounded out of the trees and she was beautiful, so beautiful. Then she put her paws on my shoulders and licked my face. I pushed her away, laughing, at the last moment remembering to modulate my strength so I didn’t launch her into another tree.

We ran together into the darkness that wasn’t dark, and I was unafraid. This would be easy, I knew, just like everything else.

[twifeordeath]

Twife or Death: Lesbian Twilight Chapter 23

Updated as of (7-22-2021) (previous) (all chapters)

All rights belong to Stephenie Meyer, and this project is non-profit and fan entertainment.

—————————–

23. THE CHOICE

Another scream on top of mine—a shriek like a chainsaw cutting through rebar.

Someone else lunged at me, but their teeth snapped closed an inch from my face as something yanked them back, flung them out of my sight.

The fire pooled in the crease of my elbow, and I screamed.

I wasn’t alone, there were others screaming—the metallic snarl was joined by a high keening that bounced off the walls and then cut off suddenly. A thrumming growl was grinding underneath the other sounds. More metal tearing, shredding…

“No!” someone howled in an agony to match mine. “No, no, no, no!”

The voices meant something to me, even through the burning that was so much more than that. Though the flames had reached my shoulder, this voice still claimed my attention. Even screaming, she sounded like an angel.

“Bella, please,” Edythe sobbed. “Please, please, please, Bella, please!”

I tried to answer, but my mouth was disconnected from the rest of me. My screams were gone, but only because there was no more air.

“Carine!” Edythe shrieked. “Help me! Bella, please, please, Bella, please!”

She was cradling my head in her lap, and her fingers were pressing hard against my scalp. Her face was unfocused, just like the hunter’s. I was falling down a tunnel in my head. The fire was coming with me, though, just as sharp as before.

Something cool blew into my mouth, filling my lungs. My lungs pushed back. Another cool breath.

Edythe came into focus, her perfect face twisted and tortured.

“Keep breathing, Bella. Breathe.”

She put her lips against mine and filled my lungs again.

There was gold around the edges of my vision—another set of cold hands.

“Alice, make splints for her leg and arm. Edythe, straighten out her airways. Which is the worst bleed?”

“Here, Carine.”

I stared at her face while the pressure against my head eased. My screams were just a broken whimper now. The pain wasn’t any less—it was worse. But the screaming didn’t help me, and it did hurt Edythe. As long as I kept my eyes on her face, I could remember something beyond the burning.

“My bag, please. Hold your breath, Alice, it will help. Thank you, Eleanor, now leave, please. She’s lost blood, but the wounds aren’t too deep. I think her ribs are the biggest problem now. Find me tape.”

“Something for the pain,” Edythe hissed.

“There—I don’t have hands. Will you?”

“This will make it better,” Edythe promised.

Someone was straightening my leg. Edythe was holding her breath, waiting, I think, for me to react. But it didn’t hurt like my arm.

“Edythe—”

“Shhh, Bella, it’s going to be okay. I swear, it’s going to be fine.”

“E—it’s—not—”

Something was digging into my scalp and something else was yanking tight against my broken arm. This tweaked my ribs, and I lost my breath.

“Hold on, Bella,” Edythe begged. “Please just hold on.”

I labored to pull in another breath.

“Not—ribs,” I choked. “Hand.”

“Can you understand her?” Carine’s voice was right next to my head.

“Just rest, Bella. Breathe.”

“No—hand,” I gasped out. “Edythe—right hand!”

I couldn’t feel her cold hands on my skin—the fire was too hot. But I heard her gasp.

“No!”

“Edythe?” Carine asked, startled.

“She bit her.” Edythe’s voice had no volume, like she’d run out of air, too.

Carine caught her breath in horror.

“What do I do, Carine?” Edythe demanded.

No one answered her. The tugging continued on my scalp, but it didn’t hurt.

“Yes,” Edythe said through her teeth. “I can try. Alice—scalpel.”

“There’s a good chance you’ll kill her yourself,” Alice said.

“Give it to me,” she snapped. “I can do this.”

I didn’t see what she did with the scalpel. I couldn’t feel anything else in my body anymore—nothing but the fire in my arm. But I watched her raise my hand to her mouth, like the hunter had. Fresh blood was welling from the wound. She put her lips over it.

I screamed again, I couldn’t help it. It was like she was pulling the fire back down my arm.

“Edythe,” Alice said.

She didn’t react, her lips still pressed to my hand. The fire warred up and down my arm, sawing back and forth. Moans escaped through my clenched teeth.

“Edythe,” Alice shouted. “Look.”

“What is it, Alice?” Carine asked.

Alice’s hand shot out and slapped Edythe’s cheek.

“Stop it, Edythe! Stop it now!”

My hand dropped away from her face. She looked at Alice with her eyes so wide they seemed like half her face. She gasped.

“Alice!” Carine barked.

“It’s too late,” Alice said. “We got here too late.”

“You can see it?” Carine said in a more subdued voice.

“There are only two futures left, Carine. She survives as one of us, or Edythe kills her trying to stop it from happening.”

“No,” Edythe moaned.

Carine was quiet. The tugging against my scalp slowed.

Edythe dropped her face to mine. She kissed my eyelids, my cheeks, my lips. “I’m sorry, I’m so sorry.”

“It doesn’t need to be this slow,” Alice complained. “Carine?”

“I made an oath, Alice.”

“I didn’t,” she snarled.

“Wait, wait,” Edythe said, her head snapping up. “She deserves a choice.”

Her lips were at my ear. I clamped my teeth against the moaning, straining to listen.

“Bella? I won’t make this decision for you. I won’t take this away from you. And I’ll understand, I promise, Bella. If you don’t want to live like this, I won’t fight you. I’ll respect what you want. I know it’s a horrible choice. I would give you any other option if I could. I would die if I could give your life back to you.” Her voice broke. “But I can’t make that trade. I can’t do anything—except stop the pain. If that’s what you want. You don’t have to be this. I can let you go—if that’s what you need.” It sounded like she was sobbing again. “Tell me what you want, Bella. Anything.”

“You,” I spit through my teeth. “Just you.”

“Are you sure?” she whispered.

I groaned. The fire was reaching its fingers into my chest. “Yes,” I coughed out. “Just—let me stay—with you.”

“Out of my way, Edythe,” Alice growled.

Her voice lashed back like a whip. “I didn’t make any oaths, either.”

Her face was at my throat, and I couldn’t feel anything besides the fire, but I could hear the quiet sound of her teeth cutting through my skin.

A/N: this was a short one. so, the thing is, by myself, I do not have the energy to try to keep going with this project right now. if there is enough interest and I have enough time, I will add the original twilight ending to this blog, but for now I’m going with the life or death ending

[twifeordeath]

Twife or Death: Lesbian Twilight Chapter 22

Updated as of (3-31-2021) (previous) (all chapters)

All rights belong to Stephenie Meyer, and this project is non-profit and fan entertainment.

—————————–

22. HIDE AND SEEK

“What was it?” I’d lost control of my voice — it was flat, uncaring.

Jasper stared at me. I kept my expression vacant and waited. Her eyes flickered between Alice’s face and mine, feeling the chaos. I knew what Alice had seen.

A peaceful atmosphere settled around me. I didn’t fight it. I used it to keep my emotions under control.

Alice recovered, too. Her face snapped back to its normal expression.

“Nothing,” she said, her voice amazingly calm and convincing. “Just the same room as before.” She looked at me, focusing for the first time. “Did you want breakfast?”

“I’ll eat at the airport.” I was calm, too. Almost like I was borrowing Jasper’s extra sense, I could feel Alice’s well-concealed desperation to get me out of the room, so that she could be alone with her. So she could tell her that they were doing something wrong, that they were going to fail.

Alice was still focused on me.

“Is your mother all right?”

I had to swallow back a throatful of bile. I could only follow the script I’d planned earlier.

“My mom was worried,” I said in a monotone voice. “She wanted to come home. It’s okay. I convinced her to stay in Florida for now.”

“That’s good.”

“Yes,” I agreed robotically.

I turned and walked slowly to the bedroom, feeling their eyes following the whole way. I shut the door behind me, and then I did what I could. I showered and got dressed in clothes that fit me. I dug through the duffel bag until I found my sock full of money—I emptied it into my pocket.

I stood there for a minute, staring at nothing, trying to think of things I was allowed to think about. I came up with one idea.

I knelt by the little bedside table and opened the top drawer. Underneath the complimentary copy of the Bible, there was a stash of stationery and a pen. I took a sheet of paper and an envelope out of the drawer.

“Edythe,” My hand was shaking.

I love you.

Sorry—again. So sorry.

She has my mom, and I have to try. I know it may not work. I am so very, very sorry.

Don’t be mad at Alice and Jasper. If I get away from them it will be a miracle. Tell them thank you for me. Alice especially.

And please, please don’t come after her. That’s what she wants. I can’t stand it if anyone else has to be hurt because of me, especially you. Please, this is the only thing I can ask you now. For me.

I’m not sorry that I met you. I’ll never be sorry that I love you.

Forgive me.

Bella.

But before I could put any of those words on the page, I felt a scream bubble up in my throat. All the emotions I’d been trying to repress- I tried to smother it with my hands but in the quiet hotel room it was like a gunshot. Alice was instantly by my side. 

“Bella, what’s wrong?” Her eyes were wild, darting around the room, like she was trying to find both the danger present in this moment as well as the potential dangers in the future. Jasper stood at the door, hesitating.

And then it all came out. The threats, the fact that I never even got to talk to my mom at all, Jamie threatening to kill her if I didn’t come alone- Jasper was on my other side now, a steady presence. I tried to focus on her hand on my shoulder, tried to tie my attention to my body and not my anxieties- but it was just too much.

The room started to darken- I couldn’t get enough breath- my heart was beating so hard I was surprised it hadn’t given out yet- I just couldn’t breathe-

A wave of darkness dragged me under, and I knew no more.

I resurfaced in fits and starts, my whole body aching. It felt like I’d been run over by a truck. No, a train. It hurt to breathe, but I was breathing. So that was a start. I felt a cool hand in mine, a soft stream of steady comfort flowing into my chest. Jasper.

“How-” I croaked, then started coughing. A strong arm was around my shoulders, holding me up, and someone held a bottle of water to my lips. I drank, gratefully, then finally opened my eyes. We were in a car.

I tried again. “How long was I out?” This time at least I made it through the whole sentence.

“Only an hour. We’re halfway to your mother’s house.” Alice replied, looking distracted.

“But-”

“We will get out ten blocks away. Just in case someone’s watching the house.” Jasper says, squeezing my hand.

“The others will be arriving soon, as soon as they can.” I didn’t know if she was keeping it vague for my sake or because she wasn’t sure herself.

Jasper looked over at Alice when she didn’t continue, then back at me. “We have a plan. We just need to make sure Jamie suspects as little as possible. I won’t sugar coat this Bella. You might get hurt. But neither you or your mom will be in serious danger. Here.”

She handed me one of the slim silver phones. “Before you enter the house, call Alice. She’s on speed dial one. She will add Carine to the call, and you can tuck the phone into the inside pocket of this jacket.”

She patted the front of an unfamiliar jacket I was now wearing. I nodded numbly. “That way we can hear everything that’s happening, and we know when to make our move. We will be right behind you Bella, I swear. We won’t let you or your mother get hurt. Do you believe me?”

“I- I believe you.” It came out shaky and not very confident, but it seemed to be enough.

“The Black pack and Esme are keeping an eye on Charlie. Julie insisted on coming with Edythe and the others on the flight.”

“Julie’s coming?” I felt a strange kind of lightness in my chest, like the aftershock of me finding out I would see Edythe soon. I missed Julie. I hadn’t gotten to see her in too long.

“Yes.” There was an unfamiliar undertone to Jasper’s voice, almost- amusement? No, pride? I didn’t know.

“They’ve landed.” Alice said, her eyes still focused on something neither one of us could see. “They’ll be ten minutes behind us. They’re going directly to the studio.”

“Jasper, you can let go now.” She turned to me with a question in her eyes. I just took a deep breath and nodded. She let go of my hand and slowly, the distant buzz of panic started to turn into a dull roar.

We turned onto a familiar street. One of them must’ve been keeping an eye on the road because Alice takes out her phone and Jasper looks down at mine. I’m sure holding down one number isn’t hard, but my hands are shaking so much I barely trust myself to do even that.

There’s a small crunch and then Jasper tucks the phone into the hidden pocket of the jacket. When I look up at her, confused, she gives me a small, slightly feral smile.

“Broke the end call button. So you can’t accidentally hang up on us.”

I feel my lips tug into what is no doubt a very bad imitation of her smile. She pats my head, but it doesn’t feel condescending. It feels comforting. I guess this is her way of saying she cares.

And then, too soon, they both stepped out of the car. Alice leaned forward to press a kiss to my forehead. I tried not to cry.

“You are strong Bella. And remember, we are right behind you.” Something in her eyes blazed, and I felt it light a spark deep inside of me. I could do this. I had to do this. Then the doors closed and I was alone again.

“Hey, what was the number?”

The cabbie’s question startled me so hard I flinched. The fear I’d tamped down for a few minutes took control again.

“Fifty-eight twenty-one.” My voice sounded strangled. The cabbie looked at me like she was nervous.

“Here we are, then.” She was anxious to get me out of her car, probably hoping I wouldn’t ask for change.

“Thank you,” I whispered. There was no need to be afraid, I reminded myself. I knew the house was empty. I had to hurry; my mom was waiting for me, terrified, maybe hurt already, in pain, depending on me.

I ran to the door, reaching up automatically to grab the key under the eave. It was dark inside, empty, normal. The smell was so familiar, it almost incapacitated me. It felt like my mother must be close, just in the other room, but I knew that wasn’t true.

I ran to the phone, turning on the kitchen light on my way. There, on the whiteboard, was a ten-digit number written in a small, neat hand. My fingers stumbled over the keypad, making mistakes. I had to hang up and start again. I concentrated on just the buttons this time, carefully pressing each one in turn. I was successful. I held the phone to my ear with a shaking hand. It rang only once.

“Hello, Bella,” that easy voice answered. “That was very quick. I’m impressed.”

“Is my mom okay?”

“She’s perfectly fine. Don’t worry, Bella, I have no quarrel with her. Unless you didn’t come alone, of course.” Light, amused.

“I’m alone.” I wasn’t lying. There was nobody else in the house.

“Very good. Now, do you know the ballet studio just around the corner from your home?”

“Yeah. I know how to get there.”

“Well, then, I’ll see you very soon.”

I hung up.

I ran from the room, through the door, out into the morning heat.

From the corner of my eye, I could almost see my mother standing in the shade of the big eucalyptus tree where I’d played as a kid. Or kneeling by the little plot of dirt around the mailbox, the cemetery of all the flowers she’d tried to grow. The memories were better than any reality I would see today. But I raced away from them.

I felt so slow, like I was running through wet sand—I couldn’t seem to get enough purchase from the concrete. I tripped over my feet several times, once falling, catching myself with my hands, scraping them on the sidewalk, and then lurching up to plunge forward again. At last I made it to the corner. Just another street now; I ran, sweat pouring down my face, gasping. The sun was hot on my skin, too bright as it bounced off the white concrete and blinded me.

When I rounded the last corner, onto Cactus, I could see the studio, looking just as I remembered it. The parking lot in front was empty, the vertical blinds in all the windows drawn. I couldn’t run anymore—I couldn’t breathe; fear had gotten the best of me. I thought of my mother to keep my feet moving, one in front of the other.

As I got closer, I could see the sign taped inside the door. It was handwritten on bright pink paper; it said the dance studio was closed for spring break. I touched the handle, tugged on it cautiously. It was unlocked. I fought to catch my breath, and opened the door.

The lobby was dark and empty, cool, the air conditioner thrumming. The plastic molded chairs were stacked along the walls, and the carpet was damp. The west dance floor was dark, I could see through the open viewing window. The east dance floor, the bigger room, the one from Alice’s vision, was lit. But the blinds were closed on the window.

Terror seized me so strongly that I was literally trapped by it. I couldn’t make my feet move forward.

And then my mom’s voice called for me.

“Bella? Bella?” That same tone of hysterical panic. I sprinted to the door, to the sound of her voice.

“Bella, you scared me! Don’t you ever do that to me again!” Her voice continued as I ran into the long, high-ceilinged room.

I stared around me, trying to find where her voice was coming from. I heard her laugh, and I spun toward the sound.

There she was, on the TV screen, mussing my hair in relief. It was Thanksgiving, and I was twelve. We’d gone to see my grandmother in California, the last year before she died. We went to the beach one day, and I’d leaned too far over the edge of the pier. Mom had seen my feet flailing, trying to reclaim my balance. “Bella? Bella?” she’d cried out in panic.

And then the TV screen was blue.

I turned slowly. The tracker was standing very still by the back exit, so still I hadn’t noticed her at first. In her hand was a remote control. We stared at each other for a long moment, and then she smiled.

She walked toward me, got just a few feet away, and then passed me to put the remote down next to the VCR. I pivoted carefully to watch her.

“Sorry about that, Bella, but isn’t it better that your mother didn’t really have to be involved in all this?” Her voice was kind.

And suddenly it hit me. My mom was safe. She was still in Florida. She’d never gotten my message. She’d never been terrified by the dark red eyes staring at me now. She wasn’t in pain. She was safe.

“Yes,” I answered, my voice breaking with relief.

“You don’t sound angry that I tricked you.”

“I’m not.” My sudden high made me brave. What did it matter now? It would be over soon. Charlie and Mom would never be hurt, would never have to be afraid. I felt almost dizzy from the relief. Some analytical part of my mind warned me that I was close to snapping from the stress, but then, losing my mind sounded like a decent option right now.

“How odd. You really mean it.” Her dark eyes looked me up and down. The irises were nearly black, just a hint of ruby around the edges. Thirsty. “I will give your strange coven this much, you humans can be quite interesting. I guess I can see the draw of observing you more closely. It’s amazing—some of you seem to have no sense of your own self-interest at all.”

"What do you want from me?" My voice was calm, indifferent. Dangerously so.

I attempted to get my heart rate up again by thinking of all the ways they could kill me. Nothing worked, not after the relief of discovering my mother's safety. At least Jamie hadn't noticed yet.

Jamie raised an eyebrow. "From you? Nothing."

I was confused for a moment, then it hit me. My eyes widened.

"No," I hissed. "You're not touching her."

"Why are you so worried, sweet bird?" Jamie crooned. "I heard that Edythe Cullen could read minds -- she can protect herself just fine. But you..." She reached out with a finger to trace my cheeks. Instantly I jerked away.

"I've always wanted to try my luck against a mind reader," she continued. "Don't we all?"

I became aware of four pairs of glistening teeth, their fangs protruding horribly out of their mouths.

"And not just a mind reader --" she counted on her hand, "-- a seer and a emotion-manipulator as well. You saw what they can do at that meeting, no?"

"Stop it," I said.

"It would be a marvelous hunt," she sighed. "Six of us against seven weak, pitiful, pacifists. The Volturi had limits on killing humans, but not so for our own kind." Her red eyes focused on mine. "I wonder how long those pretty ambers of theirs keep their color. A day? Two weeks, three after I plucked them out?"

"Stop." I couldn’t even stop to wonder where the other vampires had come from. I just stared at her, hoping against all hope that the phone was still on, that they could hear, that they were coming, that Alice had seen. That they would be ready for five vampires instead of one.

"And the first step had already been done for us, too. Bait has dropped itself into our very laps." Rigidly, I sat as she circled about me.

"Now it's time to set the trap."

My blood went cold. Murmurs echoed through the room, agreeing with her. So that's why they hadn't killed me yet, when they could have done so easily before.

I felt her touch like spiders in my hair. She paused in front of me and reached down, gripping both of the chair handles to peer straight into my face.

"So, Bella, do you have any ideas you'd like to volunteer?"

I kept my mouth shut, unmoving.

"You know perfectly what we could do." All eyes turned to a man in the corner. Despite an attractive countenance, he had hungry eyes and flexing, hungrier hands. "We could take her and leave her body for them to find."

Jamie's smile was cold. "Take her?"

I shuddered.

He didn't get the hint. "You know, we -- "

"The next time you say something like that again," Jamie snarled, "I'll nail your fucking body to the sea floor and let the fish take you. Are we clear?"

The man's mouth was open and he closed it. Jamie turned sharply away from him, hissing.

"You know, Bella," she said, ignoring the previous conversation. "I have an idea."

I stared at her, waiting.

"It always struck me strange how your lover is so willing to let you age away and die right before her eyes when the solution was right there. Your poor, cowardly beloved Edythe."

"Would you like to become a vampire, Bella?"

Something clattered outside. Jamie whipped her head around. Instantly all the vampires crouched, stances ready to kill.

"They're here," cried Jamie, her eyes glinting with delighted ferocity. She grabbed a fistful of my hair and yanked it like a leash. I gasped in pain.

"You'll be staying with me. Edythe is mine to kill."

The vampires blurred as they moved. One reached for the handle and twisted it, breaking the lock with ease. They opened it.

In stepped a vampire I hadn’t seen before. She must’ve been keeping watch outside. Dark liquid was seeping through a raw wound on her neck, like something had tore a chunk out of it. She gasped, his eyes wide with terror.

"Wolves," she screamed. "Wol--!"

Something large and furry closed its maw about his head with a sickening crunch and wrenched him from the door. Windows shattered as bodies collided with it.

I closed my eyes.

"No." I heard Jamie. "It can't be!"

I reached under my shirt. My hands found the pocket knife nestled in my sports bra. Quickly snapping out the blade, I slashed Jamie's hand. She yelped and let go. Snarling, she made a grab for me. I dodged and fell to the floor.

Something leaped between us, and I heard her crash into the wall.

"Bella?!" A tinny voice yelled from inside my jacket. I slowly crawled to the corner of the room, ignoring the chaos happening around me, and hoisted myself against the wall, struggling to get the phone out of the secret pocket.

"Bella!"

"I'm fine, I'm okay," I said quickly, but my voice still shook. “Is everyone okay?"

I heard a sigh of relief on the other side.

"Yep, never better," Quil replied. Quil. I was surprised I recognized her voice in all the chaos.

I took a sharp breath and wrapped my arms around myself, relief tenth-fold.

“By the way, did you know that one of the blood-suckers’ got electricity powers? They shut down your Mom's whole city; that's why we couldn't contact her using email or phone. Giant disaster."

"Really?"

I was beginning to notice a crackling sound. Puzzled, I held the phone out before me. It was throwing sparks. I hurriedly dropped it on the ground. Nearby, the light bulb shattered, throwing the room into darkness. A bright flash hissed through the air. I lifted my eyes. One of the vampires had lightning zapping from her fingertips, throwing sparks wildly at anything that moved.

Time to leave.

I knew I couldn't do anything. I had known this; that was why I chose to be bait. There was only one way to make sure of Mom's safety while the rest of them arrived, and that was it.

But now my role was over. I had to trust the others, to trust Julie and Edythe to fight well and remain safe. I resigned to slowly crawl out of the room. Keeping myself low and in the dark, I let my hands feel the wall as a guide. And as I made my painful progress, I watched.

The room was a mess. The windows were shattered, and what had been the doorway was now a splintered hole. One vampire was already torn to pieces, her arms and torso scattered on the floor. I couldn't see Carine or Jasper with the speed at which they moved, but Eleanor was wrestling with a brawny man, their long, large fangs bared at each other. Eleanor had scratches and cuts on her arms. Her opponent had more.

A werewolf, who I recognized as Julie, was limping. She whined, backing into the wall. I gasped as two vampires closed in on her.

"No," I moaned.

They leaped, fangs bared. Her head snapped up. She swerved, avoiding them, and closed her jaw onto one's arm. She shook him like Hulk shook a toy, and threw him into the air. The other roared, and slammed against her side. They tumbled, and I tore my gaze from them, searching for others.

I spied the hungry man from before facing off against Rosalie. Her expression, usually indifferent, was now contorted with rage. She must have listened in on the conversation through the phone. I watched, almost in fascination, as she easily dodged his flexing fingers and rammed her foot into his stomach. It came out his back, caked with black viscera. Her hands gripped his head and twisted. Once. Twice. Three times, then wrenched it off, spurting black blood everywhere. I reminded myself to thank her later.

My eyes roved over again and I spotted them. I let out a gasp.

Jamie was dodging about the center of the room, her once-calm face now twisted with rage. Opposite her was my Edythe, teeth bared, and a large, red-furred wolf. Julie! My heart rose to my throat at the sight of them. I never thought I'd see her again. Either of them.

They were fighting viciously against Jamie, who was barely holding out her own. Already her right arm hung limp at her side. I could see a large, black bruise where her collarbone was; Edythe must have snapped it. Her side and shirt was mottled with dark liquid. She had precision and speed, one of an experienced hunter. From her words before, this hadn't been the first time she'd hunted vampires. Against any other opponent, she would have won.

Not with my Edythe and Julie. Julie, who I was startled to see, fought like she was reading Edythe’s mind. Or Edythe hers. But no, it was too fluid. Julie, Julie. It’s like I’d never seen her before. She looked so fierce, so beautiful.

Edythe moved with the agility of any immortal seventeen years old girl; youthful, graceful, merciless. Her lunges were wild and unpredictable. Julie moved like one used to fighting to protect. Her motions were clean-cut and calculated, a pack leader's mentality. The both of them moved like partners in a dance, filling in where the other left open. They clicked like lock and key, thrust and parry, sword and shield. Jamie was a goner.

They almost had her, and she knew it. A break to the leg or a bite to the neck and she would be gone. Her head snapped about, taking in the scene around her, searching for help. Her allies were falling one by one, and those that didn't had ran. Outside, I heard two distinct, victorious howls. It was a matter of time. She was going to lose.

I had reached the door and was just about to ease myself out when her eyes found me.

Edythe must have read her mind, because she cried out, "NO!"

In one movement, Jamie lunged. As if in slow motion, I saw her coming towards me, mouth open wide, white fangs glinting in the moonlight. I shoved myself out the doorway but it was too late. My arms flew up to shield myself, and her teeth found my wrist.

Two sharp points pierced my flesh. A second later her entire jaw closed about my wrist like a metal trap snapping shut. I could hear the crunch of bone.

"NO!"

Daggers of pain erupted at my wrist like wildfire.

I screamed.

A/N: I had to change so much here, dear god. There was no way I was having Bella run off on her own without telling anyone, so I had to rewrite that whole scene after the letter. Then I took Bly’s lovely rough draft rewrite of this chapter and tweaked it so it made a little more sense with the way the story was now. Basically, there were a lot of changes that I’m sure I’ve forgotten about and let slip through the cracks, but since I’m the only one of the old group left, and have the memory of a broken colander, I don’t think y’all will hold it against me (also I decided to stick with the old technology, cause I like that). I might go back and add some scenes with Julie. I really enjoy the ot3 but I don’t want it to seem like it came out of left field.

[twifeordeath]

okay you guys the project is back on track! thanks to some lovely editors and contributors, really I have no idea what I would do without you guys. shooting to have Chapter 15 posted this weekend ❤️

come join us in the discord if you’d like to help, help with ideas, or just chat. we don’t bite! much

[twifeordeath]

Twife or Death: Lesbian Twilight Chapter 21

Updated as of (9-23-19) (previous) (all chapters)

All rights belong to Stephenie Meyer, and this project is non-profit and fan entertainment.

Thank you to Shelley, Taya, and the project admin Alina G.

-----------------------------

21. PHONE CALL

I could feel it was too early again when I woke, and I knew I was getting the schedule of my days and nights slowly reversed. Neither my brain nor my body liked it one bit. I lay in my bed and listened to the quiet voices of Alice and Jasper in the other room. That they were loud enough for me to hear at all was strange. I rolled over until I pretty much executed a controlled fall off the bed and then staggered blearily into the living room.

The clock on the TV said it was just after two in the morning. Alice and Jasper were sitting together on the sofa, Alice sketching again while Jasper looked over her shoulder. They didn't look up when I entered, too engrossed in Alice's work.

I crept to Jasper's side to peek.

"Did she see something more?" I asked her quietly.

"Yes. Something's brought her back to the room with the VCR, but it's light now."

I watched as Alice drew a square room with dark beams across its low ceiling. The walls were paneled in wood, a little too dark, out of date. The floor had a dark carpet with a pattern in it. There was a large window against the south wall, and an opening through the west wall led to the living room. One side of that entrance was stone — a large tan stone fireplace that was open to both rooms. The focus of the room from this perspective, the TV and VCR, balanced on a too-small wooden stand, was in the southwest corner of the room. An aged sectional sofa curved around in front of the TV, a round coffee table in front of it.

"The phone goes there," I whispered, pointing.

Two pairs of unblinking eyes stared at me.

"That's my mother's house."

Alice was already off the couch, phone in hand, dialing. I stared at the precise rendering of my mother's family room. Uncharacteristically, Jasper slid closer to me. She lightly touched her hand to my shoulder, and the physical contact seemed to make her calming influence stronger. The panic stayed dull, unfocused.

Alice's lips were trembling with the speed of her words, the low buzzing impossible to decipher. I couldn't concentrate.

"Bella," Alice said. I looked at her numbly.

"Bella, Edythe is coming to get you. She and Eleanor and Carine are going to take you somewhere, to hide you for a while."

"Edythe is coming?" The words were like a life vest, keeping my head above the flood.

"Yes, she's catching the first flight out of Seattle. We'll meet her at the airport, and you'll leave with her."

"But, my mother… she came here for my mother, Alice!" Despite Jasper, the hysteria bubbled up in my voice.

"Jasper and I will stay till she's safe."

"I can't win, Alice. You can't guard everyone I know forever. Don't you see what she's doing? She's not tracking me at all. She'll find someone, she'll hurt someone I love… Alice, I can't —"

"We'll catch her, Bella," she assured me.

"And what if you get hurt, Alice? Do you think that's okay with me? Do you think it's only my human family she can hurt me with?"

Alice looked meaningfully at Jasper. A deep, heavy fog of lethargy washed over me, and my eyes closed without my permission. My mind struggled against the fog, realizing what was happening. I forced my eyes open and stood up, stepping away from Jasper's hand.

"I don't want to go back to sleep," I snapped.

I walked to my room and shut the door, slammed it really, so I could be free to go to pieces privately. This time Alice didn't follow me. For three and a half hours I stared at the wall, curled in a ball, rocking. My mind went around in circles, trying to come up with some way out of this nightmare. There was no escape, no reprieve. I could see only one possible end looming darkly in my future. The only question was how many other people would be hurt before I reached it.

At some point into the second hour Jasper crept into the room, every angle of her posture apologetic. I didn’t have the energy to be upset at her anymore, they were trying to help. It wasn’t their fault this whole situation was spiraling out of control. This time when Jasper touched me there was no influence, no subtle calming effect, nothing except her solid presence as she hugged me, then sat there rubbing comforting circles into my back as I cried. That and holding out tissues at appropriate intervals. It didn’t help but I recognized the silent apology and accepted as best I could. 

The only solace, the only hope I had left, was knowing that I would see Edythe soon. Maybe, if I could just see her face again, I would also be able to see the solution that eluded me now.

When the phone rang, I returned to the front room, Jasper having left to rejoin Alice ten or so minutes earlier. 

Alice was talking as rapidly as ever, but what caught my attention was that, for the first time, Jasper was not in the room. I looked at the clock — it was five-thirty in the morning.

"They're just boarding their plane," Alice told me. "They'll land at nine-forty-five." Just a few more hours to keep breathing until she was here.

"Where's Jasper?"

"She went to check out."

"You aren't staying here?"

"No, we're relocating closer to your mother's house."

My stomach twisted uneasily at her words.

“Bella, I’m sorry-” She started, but I interrupted her. 

“It’s okay. I honestly feel a little embarrassed, I know you’ve made sacrifices for me and I just seem to keep making trouble for you.”

“No, you’re family now.” Alice leaned forward to hug me. “I’m just not used to- having to communicate with someone who doesn’t know me intimately, who I don’t know so well we can talk without words. God knows how mad I would be if Jasper tried to force me to calm down if I was worrying about Carine or Esme.”

But then the phone rang again, distracting me. She looked surprised, but I was already walking forward, reaching hopefully for the phone.

"Hello?" Alice asked. "No, she's right here." She held the phone out to me. Your mother, she mouthed.

"Hello?"

"Bella? Bella?" It was Renée's voice, in a familiar tone I had heard a thousand times in my childhood, anytime I'd gotten too close to the edge of the sidewalk or strayed out of her sight in a crowded place. It was the sound of panic.

I sighed. I'd been expecting this, though I'd tried to make my message as unalarming as possible without lessening the urgency of it.

"Calm down, Mom," I said in my most soothing voice, walking slowly away from Alice. I wasn't sure if I could lie as convincingly with her eyes on me. "Everything is fine, okay? Just give me a minute and I'll explain everything, I promise."

I paused, surprised that she hadn't interrupted me yet.

"Mom?"

"Be very careful not to say anything until I tell you to." The voice I heard now was as unfamiliar as it was unexpected. It was a woman's mezzo voice, a very pleasant, generic voice — the kind of voice that you heard in the background of luxury car commercials. She spoke very quickly. 

"Now, I don't need to hurt your mother, so please do exactly as I say, and she'll be fine." She paused for a minute while I listened in mute horror. "That's very good," she congratulated. "Now repeat after me, and do try to sound natural. Please say, 'No, Mom, stay where you are.'"

"No, Mom, stay where you are." My voice was barely more than a whisper.

"I can see this is going to be difficult." The voice was amused, still light and friendly. "Why don't you walk into another room now so your face doesn't ruin everything? There's no reason for your mother to suffer. As you're walking, please say, 'Mom, please listen to me.' Say it now."

"Mom, please listen to me," my voice pleaded. I walked very slowly to the bedroom, feeling Alice's worried stare on my back. I shut the door behind me, trying to think clearly through the terror that gripped my brain.

"There now, are you alone? Just answer yes or no."

"Yes."

"But they can still hear you, I'm sure."

"Yes."

"All right, then," the agreeable voice continued, "say, 'Mom, trust me.' "

"Mom, trust me."

"This worked out rather better than I expected. I was prepared to wait, but your mother arrived ahead of schedule. It's easier this way, isn't it? Less suspense, less anxiety for you."

I waited.

"Now I want you to listen very carefully. I'm going to need you to get away from your friends; do you think you can do that? Answer yes or no."

"No."

"I'm sorry to hear that. I was hoping you would be a little more creative than that. Do you think you could get away from them if your mother's life depended on it? Answer yes or no."

Somehow, there had to be a way. I remembered that we were going to the airport. Sky Harbor International Airport: crowded, confusingly laid out…

"Yes."

"That's better. I'm sure it won't be easy, but if I get the slightest hint that you have any company, well, that would be very bad for your mother," the friendly voice promised. "You must know enough about us by now to realize how quickly I would know if you tried to bring anyone along with you. And how little time I would need to deal with your mother if that was the case. Do you understand? Answer yes or no."

"Yes." My voice broke.

"Very good, Bella. Now, this is what you have to do. I want you to go to your mother's house. Next, to the phone, there will be a number. Call it, and I'll tell you where to go from there." I already knew where I would go, and where this would end. But I would follow her instructions exactly. "Can you do that? Answer yes or no."

"Yes."

"Before noon, please, Bella. I haven't got all day," she said politely.

"Where's Phyllis?" I asked tersely.

"Ah, be careful now, Bella. Wait until I ask you to speak, please."

I waited.

"It's important, now, that you don't make your friends suspicious when you go back to them. Tell them that your mother called and that you talked her out of coming home for the time being. Now repeat after me, 'Thank you, Mom.' Say it now."

"Thank you, Mom." The tears were coming. I tried to fight them back.

"Say, 'I love you, Mom, I'll see you soon.' Say it now."

"I love you, Mom." My voice was thick. "I'll see you soon," I promised.

"Goodbye, Bella. I look forward to seeing you again." She hung up.

I held the phone to my ear. My joints were frozen with terror — I couldn't unbend my fingers to drop it.

I knew I had to think, but my head was filled with the sound of my mother's panic. Seconds ticked by while I fought for control.

Slowly, slowly, my thoughts started to break past that brick wall of anguish. To plan. I had no choices now but one: to go to the mirrored room and die. I had no guarantees, nothing to give to keep my mother alive. I could only hope that Jamie would be satisfied with winning the game, that beating Edythe would be enough. Despair gripped me; there was no way to bargain, nothing I could offer or withhold that could influence her. But I still had no choice. I had to try.

I pushed the terror back as well as I could. My decision was made. It did no good to waste time agonizing over the outcome. I had to think clearly, because Alice and Jasper were waiting for me, and evading them was absolutely essential, not to mention absolutely impossible.

I was suddenly grateful that Jasper was gone. If she had been here to feel my anguish in the last five minutes, how could I have kept them from being suspicious? I choked back the dread, the anxiety, tried to stifle it. I couldn't afford it now. I didn't know when she would return.

I tried to concentrate on my escape, then immediately realized that I couldn’t plan anything. I had to be undecided. No doubt Alice would see the change soon if she hadn’t already. I couldn’t let her see how it happened. If it happened. How could I get away? Especially when I couldn’t even think about it?

I wanted to go see what Alice had made of all this if she’d seen any changes yet, but I knew I had to deal with one more thing alone before Jasper got back.

I had to accept that I would never see Edythe again. Not even one last look at her face to take with me to the mirror room. I was going to hurt her, and I couldn’t say goodbye. It was like being tortured. I burned in it for a minute, let it break me. And then I had to pull my shell together to go face Alice.

The only expression I could manage was a blank, dead look, but I felt like that was understandable. I walked into the living room, my script ready to go.

Alice was bent over the desk, gripping the edge with two hands. Her face...

At first, the panic broke through my mask, and I jumped around the couch to get to her. While I was still in motion, I realized what she must be seeing. It brought me up short a few feet away from her.

“Alice,” I said dully.

She didn’t react when I called her name. Her head rocked slowly from side to side. Her expression brought the panic back again—maybe this wasn’t about me, maybe she was watching my mother.

I took another step forward, reaching out to touch her arm.

“Alice!” Jasper’s voice whipped from the door, and then she was right behind Alice, hands curling over hers, loosening them from their grip on the table. Across the room, the door swung shut with a low click.

“What is it?” she demanded. “What did you see?”

She turned her empty face away from me, looking blindly into Jasper’s eyes.

“Bella,” she said.

“I’m right here.”

Her head twisted, her eyes locked on mine, their expression still blank. I realized that she hadn’t been speaking to me—she’d been answering Jasper’s question.

[twifeordeath]

Twife or Death: Lesbian Twilight Chapter 19

Updated as of 12-13-18 (previous) (all chapters)

All rights belong to Stephenie Meyer, and this project is non-profit and fan entertainment. Thank you to Shelley, Taya, and the project admin Alina G.

19. GOODBYES

Charlie was waiting up for me. All the house lights were on. My mind was blank as I tried to think of a way to make this seem normal. Just a normal trip- suddenly I had an idea. An inkling of an idea, but it was a start.

Edythe pulled up slowly, staying well back from my truck. All three of them were acutely alert, ramrod straight in their seats, listening to every sound of the wood, looking through every shadow, catching every scent, searching for something out of place. The engine cut off, and I sat, motionless, as they continued to listen.

"She's not here," Edythe said tensely. "Let's go." Eleanor reached over to help me get out of the harness.

I felt moisture filling up my eyes as I looked at Eleanor. I barely knew her, and yet, somehow, not knowing when I would see her again after tonight was anguish. I knew this was just a faint taste of the goodbyes I would have to survive in the next hour, and the thought made the tears begin to spill.

"Alice, Eleanor." Edythe's voice was soft but stern. They slinked soundlessly into the darkness, instantly disappearing. Edythe opened my door and took my hand, then put an arm around my waist, pulling me closer to her, like proximity would protect me. She walked me swiftly toward the house, eyes always roving through the night.

"Fifteen minutes," she said under her breath.

"I can do this." I sniffled. My tears had given me inspiration.

I stopped on the porch and took hold of her face in my hands. I looked fiercely into her eyes.

"I love you," I said in a low, intense voice. "I will always love you, no matter what happens now."

"Nothing is going to happen to you, Bella," she said just as fiercely.

"Just follow the plan, okay? Keep Charlie safe for me."

"Get inside, Bella. We have to hurry." Her voice was urgent.

I nodded and turned to open the door, knowing Edythe would be gone before I even closed it again.

"Bella?" Charlie had been hovering in the living room, and now peered out into the hallway.

“Ch- Ma, I have a really big favor to ask.” I used my fear and sadness to give my voice gravity. She came up to me, cupping my face in her hands.

“You okay, Bells?”

“Yeah, it’s not me. It’s- Alice. One of her childhood friends- she died recently.” I took a deep steadying breath. Charlie looked like she was lost for words. “I promised I’d come with her to the funeral. Most of the family was already out of town and Edythe and Jasper have a massive final project they’re working on- well nobody else can go and I didn’t want her to have to go alone.”

“I- sure. But, where is it?”

“It’s in Phoenix.”

“Wow Bells, that’s far- are you sure-” She took one look at my face and stopped halfway through the question. “Alright, I’ll call the school and let them know you’ll be gone a few days. It won’t take longer than that, right?”

“Actually, I think some pipes broke in the school and it’s been flooded, so we probably won’t have school tomorrow or the day after at all, depending on the damage and how fast they can get it fixed. I think Wednesday was a teacher work day anyway. I don’t know, they’ll probably call or email.” I start walking up the stairs. I knew for certain they were broken by now because Jasper seemed to take it as a personal responsibility to sneak in and, as Edythe said she’d phrased it “royally fuck things up”.

“Are you sure you don’t want me to come?” Charlie realized probably, as soon as the question left her mouth, how it would sound to her teenage daughter. “I mean, I just worry. Keep me updated alright? You don’t have to call me every night but I’d really appreciate it.”

“I will be texting you to let you know we haven’t run into a moose anywhere or gotten pulled over for speeding. Just joking Ma!” I looked back and saw her smile when I didn’t just call her Charlie again. She was softening, I knew it.

“Alright, let me know if you need help packing or anything, I’ll go make you some sandwiches for the road. You’re not leaving tonight, are you? Not in this weather?”

“No Ma, I said I’d stay the night with her, keep her company. Don’t worry, she’s a much better and more responsible driver than I am.”

“Okay, go pack already, don’t want to keep her waiting.” I ran up the rest of the stairs and into my room.

I turned to my dresser, and Edythe was already there, silently yanking out armfuls of random clothes, which she proceeded to throw to me. I rolled my eyes at her before trying to at least fold them slightly before shoving them in my bag. If I rushed too much Charlie would get suspicious. I think Edythe realized this, and after taking a deep breath started handing me underwear, a few folded shirts and sweaters. The bag was pretty much full now.

I jerked, exasperated, on the zipper of my bag. Edythe suddenly stopped in mid motion leaning over to help me, then put up a finger like she’d had an idea and rushed out of the room. I swore I could almost feel the breeze of her passage as she ran back in, putting a toothbrush, toothpaste and hairbrush into a smaller bag and shoving it in one of the side pockets.

She went to brush my hands away and zip it up herself but paused, looking over at me. I smiled and nodded, with a quiet ‘thanks’. It may not have been a big deal to anyone else, but I got frustrated at how helpless I felt when people did stuff for me just because of my dyspraxia, or lifted things for me without asking. She handed me the bag and I slung it over my shoulder.

“Meet you in the car.” She whispered, climbing out the window. I would never be able to get used to things like that. I made sure the window was locked before glancing around my room, trying to think if I’d missed anything. It was only a few days anyway. I went down the stairs much slower than I had gone up. The extra weight made my coordination even worse. Hey, at least it was stairs and not a ladder. I hated ladders with the fiery passion of a thousand burning suns. It was up there with bicycles in my list of things I would not even try to do again because it was pointless and just hurt.

“Alright, I’m heading out.” I peeked into the kitchen to see Charlie wrapping two sandwiches in plastic wrap.

“Perfect timing.” She stuck them into a bag and handed it over. “Be careful, alright? I know you’re just going on a minor road trip and not skydiving, but- I’m sorry. Come here, let me give you a hug.” I stuck the sandwiches into a pocket of my bag with a small smile and walked over to wrap my arms around her waist. 

“I love you.” It felt too much like a goodbye, and I think Charlie sensed something was off.

“Hey, I’m not going anywhere.” Hopefully she chalked it up to me coming face to face with the fragility of human life because of the funeral and not because of actual impending physical danger.

"I'll call you tomorrow." I said as I stepped back, trying to inject some cheerfulness into my voice. She patted my head and went to open the door for me.

“Give Alice my condolences. Or a hug would probably do better.” 

“Will do. Bye!” I walked past her and out the door, no longer able to control my facial expression. I made to to the car before I started crying. What if something happened? What if something happened to me and she blamed herself for letting me go? I opened the door and threw my bag into the backseat before buckling myself in and turning the car on, hitting the gas maybe a bit too hard.

Edythe reached for my hand.

"Pull over," she said as the house, and Charlie, disappeared behind us.

"I can drive," I said through the tears pouring down my cheeks.

“Sweetheart, please.”

“Alright.” I wiped a hand across my face before pulling onto the shoulder.

I was about to open the door before I felt her hands grip my waist.

“It’s starting to rain, I don’t want you to get wet. I can just do it like this, okay?” I had no idea what she was talking about but I was too tired and upset so I just nodded. She pulled me across her lap and suddenly she was in the driver's seat. I mechanically buckled my seatbelt as she pulled back onto the road.

Lights flared suddenly behind us. I stared out the back window, eyes wide with horror.

"It's just Alice," she reassured me. She took my hand again.

"The tracker?"

"The tracker followed us. She's running behind us now."

My body went cold.

"Can we outrun her?"

"No." But she sped up as she spoke. The truck's engine whined in protest.

My plan suddenly didn't feel so brilliant anymore.

“Eleanor is going to join us soon.”

I was staring back at Alice's headlights when the truck shuddered and a dark shadow sprung up outside the window.

I gasped in horror before what Edythe had said finally sunk in.

“What? That’s not- why couldn’t she just get into the car like a normal person she almost scared me to death.”

“Sorry, I didn’t want to say she was about to jump on the goddamn roof.”

“Next time just say that, okay?” I felt a bit out of breath so I leaned my head against the dashboard.

“I’m sorry Bella.” She took my hand and squeezed it reassuringly. “It's going to be alright.”

"I’m afraid for you," I whispered.

"We'll be together again in a few days," she said, "Don't forget that this was your idea." I could tell she was trying to lighten the mood.

"It was the best idea — of course it was mine."

Her answering smile was bleak and disappeared immediately.

"Why did this happen?" I asked, my voice catching. "Why me?"

She stared blankly at the road ahead. "It's my fault — I was a fool to expose you like that. I’m sorry."

"That's not what I meant," I insisted. "I was there, big deal. It didn't bother the other two. Why did this Jamie decide she wants to kill me? There're people all over the place, why me?"

She hesitated, thinking before she answered.

"I got a good look at her mind tonight," she began in a low voice. "I'm not sure if there's anything I could have done to avoid this, once she saw you. But when I defended you… well, that made it a lot worse. She's not used to being thwarted, no matter how insignificant the object. She thinks of herself  as a hunter and nothing else. Her existence is consumed with tracking, and a challenge is all she asks of life. Suddenly we've presented her with a beautiful challenge — a large clan of strong fighters all bent on protecting the one vulnerable element. You wouldn't believe how euphoric she is now. It's her favorite game, and we've just made it her most exciting game ever." Her tone was full of disgust.

She paused a moment.

"I don't think I have any choice but to kill her now," she muttered. "Carine won't like it."

I could hear the tires cross the bridge, though I couldn't see the river in the dark. I knew we were getting close. I had to ask her now.

"How can you kill a vampire?"

She glanced at me with unreadable eyes and her voice was quiet. "The only way to be sure is to behead her and burn the body.”

"And the other two will fight with her?"

"The redhead, Victoria, will. I'm not sure about Laurent. They don't have a very strong bond — she's only with them for convenience. She was embarrassed by Jamie in the meadow…"

"But Jamie and Victoria — they'll try to kill you?" I asked, my voice raw.

"I’ll have Eleanor, and Carine. And the advantage of reading their minds, don’t worry about me. Your only concern is keeping yourself safe and — please— try not to be too reckless."

"Is she still following?"

"Yes. She won't attack the house, though. Not tonight."

She turned off onto the invisible drive, with Alice following behind.

“Eleanor will carry you inside, alright? Get you in there fast and safe while I keep watch for Alice.” I nodded as we drove up to the house. The lights inside were bright, but they did little to alleviate the blackness of the encroaching forest. Eleanor had my door open before the truck was stopped; I closed my eyes as she pulled me gently out of the seat, tucked me like a football into her vast chest, and ran me through the door.

We burst into the large white room, Edythe and Alice at our sides. All of them were there; they were already on their feet at the sound of our approach. Laurent stood in their midst. I could hear low growls rumble deep in Eleanor's throat as she set me down next to Edythe. I muttered a quick ‘thanks’ to her as I tried to steady my breathing. She patted my shoulder distractedly.

"She's tracking us," Edythe announced, glaring balefully at Laurent.

Laurent's face was unhappy. "I was afraid of that."

Alice slid over to Jasper's side and whispered in her ear; her lips quivered with the speed of her silent speech. They sped up the stairs together. Rosalie watched them, and then moved quickly to Eleanor's side. Her beautiful eyes were intense and — when they flickered to my face — angry.

"What will she do?" Carine asked Laurent in chilling tones.

"I'm sorry," she answered. "I was afraid, when your girl there defended her, that it would set her off."

"Can you stop her?"

Laurent shook her head. "Nothing stops Jamie when she gets started."

"We'll stop her," Eleanor promised. There was no doubt what she meant.

"You can't bring her down. I've never seen anything like her in my three hundred years. She's absolutely lethal. That's why I joined her coven."

Her coven, I thought, of course. The show of leadership in the clearing was merely that, a show.

Laurent was shaking her head. She glanced at me, perplexed, and back to Carine. "Are you sure it's worth it?"

Edythe's low growl filled the room; Laurent cringed.

Carine looked gravely at Laurent. "I'm afraid you're going to have to make a choice."

Laurent understood. She deliberated for a moment. Her eyes took in every face, and finally swept the bright room.

"I'm intrigued by the life you've created here. But I won't get in the middle of this. I bear none of you any enmity, but I won't go up against Jamie. I think I will head north — to that clan in Denali." She hesitated. "Don't underestimate Jamie. She's got a brilliant mind and unparalleled senses. She's every bit as comfortable in the human world as you seem to be, and she won't come at you head on… I'm sorry for what's been unleashed here. Truly sorry." She bowed her head, but I saw her flicker another puzzled look at me.

"Go in peace," was Carine's formal answer.

Laurent took another long look around the room and then hurried out the door.

The silence lasted less than a second.

"How close?" Carine looked to Edythe.

Esme was already moving; her hand touched an inconspicuous keypad on the wall, and with a groan, huge metal shutters began sealing up the glass wall. I gaped.

"About three miles out past the river; she's circling around to meet up with Victoria."

"What's the plan?"

"We'll lead her off, and then Jasper and Alice will run her south."

"And then?"

Edythe's tone was deadly. "As soon as Bella is clear, we hunt her."

"I guess there's no other choice," Carine agreed, her face grim.

Edythe turned to Rosalie.

"Get her upstairs and trade clothes," Edythe said. Rosalie stared back at her with livid disbelief.

"Why should I?" she hissed. "What is she to me? Except a menace — a danger you've chosen to inflict on all of us."

I flinched back from the venom in her voice.

"Rose…" Eleanor murmured, putting one hand on her shoulder.

“You don’t have to do this.” She hissed at Eleanor. “You don’t owe her anything.”

“She matters to Edythe, so she matters to me.” Was Eleanor’s steady reply. Something, some doubt or other emotion flickered across Rosalie’s face but she shook her head and ran off.

But I was watching Edythe carefully, worried about her reaction.

She simply had looked away from Rosalie as if she hadn't spoken.

"Esme?" she asked calmly.

"Of course," Esme murmured. “May I?” She reached her arms out to me like she wanted to pick me up. I sighed and nodded, resigning myself to these vampires just wanting to lug me around since I was otherwise so slow.

Esme was at my side in half a heartbeat, swinging me up easily into her arms, and dashing up the stairs before I could gasp in shock.

"Why are we doing this?" I asked breathlessly as she set me down in a dark room somewhere off the second-story hall.

"Trying to confuse the smell. It won't work for long, but it might help get you out." I could hear her clothes falling to the floor.

"I don't think I'll fit…" I hesitated, but her gentle hands were tugging my shirt over my head. I quickly stripped my jeans off myself. She handed me something, it felt like a shirt. I struggled to get my arms through the right holes. As soon as I was done she handed me her slacks. I yanked them on, but I couldn't get my feet out; they were too long. She deftly rolled the hems a few times so I could stand. Somehow she was already in my clothes. She led me back to the stairs, where Alice stood, a small leather bag in one hand. They each grabbed one of my elbows and half-carried me as they flew down the stairs.

It appeared that everything had been settled downstairs in our absence. Edythe and Eleanor were ready to leave, Eleanor carrying a heavy-looking backpack over her shoulder. Carine was handing something small to Esme. She turned and handed Alice the same thing — it was a thin silver cell phone.

"Esme and Rosalie will be taking your truck if that’s okay, Bella," she told me as he passed. I nodded, glancing warily at Rosalie. She was examining her nails as if nobody else in the room existed.

"Alice, Jasper — take the Mercedes. You'll need the dark tint in the south."

They nodded as well.

"We're taking the Jeep."

I was surprised to see that Carine intended to go with Edythe. I realized suddenly, with a stab of fear, that they made up the hunting party.

"Alice," Carine asked, "will they take the bait?"

Everyone watched Alice as she closed her eyes and became incredibly still.

Finally her eyes opened. "She'll track you. Victoria will follow the truck. We should be able to leave after that." Her voice was certain.

"Let's go." Carine began to walk toward the kitchen.

Edythe was at my side at once, pulling me into her arms. I wrapped my arms around her shoulders and closed my eyes in an effort not to cry. She pulled back a few moments later, looking me in the eyes, determined, before her expression softened and she stood up on tiptoe to press a quick kiss to my lips.

“See you later.” She said as she took one last glance at me.

And they were gone.

We stood there, the others looking away from me as a tear streaked down my face, though Alice gave me a quick hug.

The silent moment dragged on, and then Esme's phone vibrated in her hand. It flashed to her ear.

"Now," she said. Rosalie stalked out the front door without another glance in my direction, but Esme touched my cheek as she passed.

"Be safe." Her whisper lingered behind them as they slipped out the door. I heard my truck start thunderously, and then fade away.

Jasper and Alice waited. Alice's phone seemed to be at her ear before it buzzed.

"Edythe says Victoria is on Esme's trail. I'll get the car." She vanished into the shadows the way Edythe had gone.

Jasper and I looked at each other. She stood across the length of the entryway from me… being careful.

"You're wrong, you know," she said quietly.

"What?" I thought this was the first time she’d spoken directly to me.

"I can feel what you're feeling now — and you are worth it."

"I'm not," I mumbled. "If anything happens to them, it will be for nothing."

"You're wrong," she repeated, smiling kindly at me.

I heard nothing, but then Alice stepped through the front door and came toward me with her arms held out.

"May I?" she asked. I sniffed and nodded, this time needing the comfort of someone's physical presence, needing the reassurance, even if it wasn’t Edythe.

She lifted me in her slender arms as easily as Eleanor had, shielding me protectively, and then we flew out the door, leaving the lights bright behind us.

[twifeordeath]

Twife or Death: Lesbian Twilight Chapter 17

Updated as of 11-8-18 (previous) (all chapters)

All rights belong to Stephenie Meyer, and this project is non-profit and fan entertainment. Thank you to Shelley, Taya, and the project admin Alina G.

17. THE GAME

It was just beginning to drizzle when Edythe turned onto my street. I had wanted to go home to change into more appropriate clothes for the weather, since I’d feel guilty if I kept borrowing Edythe’s jacket, and also to let Charlie know what I was up to. Up until that moment, I'd had no doubt that she'd be coming in with me to the house.

And then I saw the black car, a weathered Ford, parked in Charlie's driveway — and heard Edythe mutter something unintelligible in a low, worried voice.

Leaning away from the rain under the shallow front porch, Julie Black stood behind her mother's wheelchair. Bonnie's face was impassive as stone as Edythe parked my truck against the curb. Julie was staring intently anywhere but at us, her expression innocent, as if she didn’t know who I was with.

Edythe's low voice sounded a little like a child caught in wrongdoing. "So that’s why Eleanor said Julie had to leave early."

"Maybe she came to see Charlie?" I guessed, more confused.

Edythe just shrugged, answering Bonnie's gaze through the rain with narrowed eyes. I felt relieved that Charlie wasn't home yet.

"Let me deal with this," I suggested. The little that I do know about the relationship between the Cullens and the Quileute made me anxious.

To my surprise, Edythe nodded. "That's probably best. Be careful, though. I don’t want to get Julie into trouble." She scrunched up her face. “Though she probably got an earful already for hanging out with Eleanor and Rosalie.”

I sighed and put my hand on the door handle.

"Could you get them inside?" Edythe tightened the laces on her shoes. "Then I can leave. I'll come back at dusk."

"Do you want my truck?" I offered, meanwhile wondering how I would explain its absence to Charlie.

She rolled her eyes. "You know I could walk home faster than this truck moves. A few minutes in the rain is nothing."

"You don't have to leave," I said wistfully. “Once I explain everything to Bonnie, I’m sure she’ll understand if you come in.”

She smiled at my glum expression. "Actually, I do. After you get rid of them" — she nodded in the Blacks' direction — "you still have to prepare Charlie to meet your new girlfriend." She grinned widely, showing all of her teeth.

"Didn’t you already meet each other?"

“Not ‘officially’.”

I groaned. “Thanks a lot.”

She smiled the crooked smile that I loved. "I'll be back soon," she promised. Her eyes flickered back to the porch, and then she leaned in to give me a quick peck just under the edge of my jaw. My heart lurched, and I smiled at her. Then I glanced toward the porch. Bonnie's face was no longer impassive. She was frowning now, while Julie still pretended to see nothing. "Soon," I stressed as I opened the door and stepped out into the rain. I could feel her eyes on my back as I half-ran through the light sprinkle toward the porch.

"Hey, Bonnie. Hi, Julie." I greeted them as cheerfully as I could manage. "Charlie's gone for the day — I hope you haven't been waiting long."

"Not long," Bonnie said in a subdued tone. Her black eyes were piercing. "I just wanted to bring this up." She indicated a brown paper sack resting in her lap.

"Thanks," I said, though I had no idea what it could be. "Why don't you come in for a minute and dry off?"

I pretended to be oblivious to her intense scrutiny as I unlocked the door, and waved them in ahead of me.

"Here, let me take that," I offered, turning to shut the door. I allowed myself one last glance at Edythe, still sitting in the truck. She was waiting, relaxed yet perfectly still, her eyes solemn.

"You'll want to put it in the fridge," Bonnie noted as she handed me the package. "It's some of Harry Clearwater's homemade fish fry — Charlie's favorite. The fridge keeps it drier."

"Thanks," I repeated, but with feeling this time. "I was running out of new ways to fix fish, and she's bound to bring home more tonight."

"Fishing again?" Bonnie asked with a subtle gleam in her eye. "Down at the usual spot? Maybe I'll run by and see her."

"No," I quickly lied, glad that my dark skin wouldn’t betray the blood rushing from my face. "She was headed someplace new… but I have no idea where."

Bonnie studied me, a thoughtful look crossing her eyes.

"Jules," she said, still appraising me. "Why don't you go get that new picture of Rebecca out of the car? I'll leave that for Charlie, too."

"Where is it?" Julie asked, her voice careful. I shot her a glance and caught her eyes, both of us knowing too well what her departure meant. Julie’s brows pulled together.

"I think I saw it in the trunk," Bonnie said. "You may have to dig for it."

Julie hesitated. Then she reluctantly retreated back out into the rain.

Bonnie and I faced each other in silence. After a few seconds, the quiet started to feel awkward, so I turned and headed to the kitchen. I could hear her wet wheels squeak against the linoleum as she followed. I shoved the bag onto the crowded top shelf of the fridge, and slowly turned around to meet her again. Her deeply lined face was unreadable. "I’m sorry you had to come all this way in the rain,” I offered politely. “Charlie won't be back for a long time."

She nodded in agreement, but said nothing.

"Thanks again for the fish fry," I tried again.

She continued nodding. Not knowing what else to say, I sighed and folded my arms across my chest. She seemed to sense that I had given up on small talk. "Bella," she said, and then she hesitated.

I waited, maintaining what I hoped was as neutral of an expression as possible.

"Bella," she said again, "Charlie is one of my best friends."

"Yes."

“And as the daughter of my dear friend, I see you as my niece, if not my own child.” She paused, then spoke each word carefully in her rumbling voice. "I noticed you've been spending time with one of the Cullens."

"Yes," I repeated, bracing myself.

Bonnie’s gray brows knitted, and I could see her choosing her next words in her mind. "The Cullen family has a certain... reputation on the reservation. Because of that… Even though it may not be my business, but I don’t think it’s a good idea that you’re with Edythe Cullen.” She stopped, then added after a while. “I’m worried for you."

I took a deep breath. "Actually, I did hear about that," I informed her slowly.

She raised an eyebrow. “Oh?”

"I heard that the Cullens weren’t allowed to set foot in La Push." I could see that my less than subtle reminder of the agreement that both bound and protected her tribe pulled her up short.

"That's true," she said.

“But they haven’t done anything to deserve such a reputation, especially since they’re not like the...” I searched for a word, unwilling to voice a truth both of us knew too well. “...others.”

Bonnie’s eyes were guarded. "You seem well informed about the Cullens. More informed than I expected."

I hoped Bonnie would think it was because the Cullens had welcomed me into their confidence, and not because of Julie. “Maybe even better informed than you think.”

She pursed her thick lips as she considered that. "Maybe." she allowed. Then she added, "Is Charlie as well informed?"

I frowned.

"Charlie likes the Cullens a lot. And she’s met Edythe, so..." I trailed off, not understanding. She must have seen my confusion. Her expression was unhappy, but unsurprised.

"It's not my business," she said. "But it may be Charlie's."

"Though it would be my business, again, whether or not I think that it's Charlie's business, right?" Why was she bringing Charlie into this? Charlie didn’t have to know about the… extraordinary parts of the story. But even if she did, what would it do? The Cullens were good people.

I wondered if she even understood my confused question as I struggled not to say anything compromising. But she seemed to. She thought about it while the rain picked up against the roof, the only sound breaking the silence.

"Yes," she finally surrendered. "I guess that's your business, too."

I could feel that she was trying to communicate something to me, make me understand, but I could only sigh with relief. "Thanks, Bonnie."

"Just think about what you're doing, Bella," she urged.

"Okay," I agreed quickly.

She frowned. "What I meant to say was, your actions have more consequences than you know."

I looked into her eyes, filled with nothing but concern for me, and there was nothing I could say.

Just then there was a knock on the front door, and I jumped at the sound. "There's no picture anywhere in that car." Julie's complaint reached us before she did. The shoulders of her shirt were stained with the rain, her hair dripping, when she rounded the corner.

"Hmm," Bonnie grunted, suddenly detached, spinning her chair around to face her daughter. "I guess I left it at home."

Julie rolled her eyes dramatically. "Great."

"Well, Bella, tell Charlie" — Bonnie paused before continuing — "that we stopped by, I mean."

"I will," I murmured.

Julie stared back and forth between us. "Are we leaving already? I didn’t even get to talk to Bella."

"Charlie's gonna be out late," Bonnie explained as she rolled herself past Julie. “And you said you planned to hang out with your friends.”

"Oh! Right." Julie winked at me. "Well, I guess I'll see you later, then, Bella."

"Sure," I was glad Bonnie was facing away from us.

"Take care," Bonnie said as I held open the door. I nodded, not answering.

Julie helped her mother out the door. I waved briefly, glancing swiftly toward my now-empty truck, and then shut the door before they were gone.

I stood in the hallway for a minute, listening to the sound of their car as it backed out and drove away, waiting for the anxiety to subside. When the tension eventually faded a bit, I headed upstairs to change out of my dressy clothes.

I tried on a couple of different tops, unsure what to expect tonight, though I gave up quickly — throwing on an old flannel shirt and jeans — knowing I would be in my raincoat all night anyway.

At least concentrating on the task made it easier to push my unease from Bonnie’s conversation out of my mind. Now that I was removed from Edythe's influence, I began to make up for not being anxious before.

My phone rang suddenly, and I fished it out of my pocket. For a moment I hoped it would be Edythe. A glance at the ID told me otherwise.

"Hello?" I said.

"Bella? It's me," Jessica said.

"Oh, hey Jess!" I scrambled for a moment to think of why she was calling me and found a possible reason. "How was the dance?"

"It was so much fun!" Jessica gushed. Needing no more invitation than that, she launched into an excited account of the previous night. I listened intently, but it wasn't easy to concentrate. Jessica’s rapid firing of words, McKayla, the dance, the school — combined with my own conflicting thoughts, and the fact that my eyes kept flashing to the window, trying to judge the degree of light behind the heavy clouds.

Till Jessica said something that made me gasp.

"Did you hear what I said, Bella?" Jess asked.

"I'm sorry, what? Can you repeat that?" I couldn’t believe it.

"I said, McKayla kissed me!"

"Oh my god!” I could hear her hyperventilating from the other side of the phone. “That's wonderful, Jess, I’m so happy for you!”

Happy for Jess, and happy for McKayla. They would make a great couple.

"Well, enough about me for now. So what did you do yesterday?" Jessica said.

"Nothing, really. I just hung around outside to enjoy the sun,” I responded casually.

I heard Charlie's car in the garage.

"So,” I heard Jess’s voice as if from a distance, “did you ever hear anything more from Edythe Cullen?"

The front door slammed and I could hear Charlie banging around under the stairs, putting her tackle away.

"Um." I hesitated, not sure what to say or how much to say, now that Charlie was home.

"Hi there, kiddo!" Charlie called as she walked into the kitchen. I waved at her.

Jess heard her voice and understood. "Oh, your ma's there. Never mind — we'll talk more tomorrow. See you in Trig!"

"See ya, Jess." I hung up the phone and placed it back into my pocket.

"Hey, ma," I said. She was scrubbing her hands in the sink. "Where's the fish?"

"I put it out in the freezer."

"I'll go grab a few pieces before they freeze — Bonnie dropped off some of Harry Clearwater's fish fry this afternoon." I worked to sound enthusiastic.

"She did?" Charlie's eyes lit up. "That's my favorite."

Charlie cleaned up while I got dinner ready. It didn't take long till we were sitting at the table, eating in silence. Charlie was enjoying her food. I was wondering desperately how to fulfill my assignment, struggling to think of a way to broach the subject.

"What did you do with yourself today?" she asked, snapping me out of my reverie.

"Well, this afternoon I just hung out around the house…" Only the very recent part of this afternoon, actually. I tried to keep my voice upbeat, but my stomach was hollow. "And this morning I was over at the Cullens'."

Charlie almost dropped her fork. "Dr. Cullen's place?" she asked in surprise.

I pretended not to notice her reaction. "Yeah."

"What were you doing there?"

"Well, I sort of have a date with Edythe Cullen tonight, and she wanted to introduce me to her parents… Ma?"

“So last night wasn’t a date but tonight is?” Charlie says, mouth turning up in a smug smile.

I groan, putting my face in my hands. “We're just going to play baseball with her family."

She raised her eyebrows, and then chuckled. "You're playing baseball?"

"Well, I'll probably watch most of the time."

"You must really her," she observed carefully.

I sighed and rolled my eyes for her benefit.

I heard the roar of an engine pull up in front of the house. I jumped up and started cleaning my dishes.

"Leave the dishes, I can do them tonight. You baby me too much."

The doorbell rang, and Charlie stalked off to answer it. I was half a step behind her.

I hadn't realized how hard it was pouring outside. Edythe stood in the halo of the porch light, looking like a model in an advertisement for raincoats.

"Come on in, Edythe."

I breathed a sigh of relief as Charlie’s tone became much more relaxed and polite.

"Thank you," Edythe said in a respectful voice.

"Have a seat there, Edythe."

I grimaced.

Edythe sat down fluidly in the only chair, forcing me to sit next to Chief Swan on the sofa. I quickly shot her a dirty look. She winked behind Charlie's back.

"So I hear you're getting my girl to watch baseball." Only in Washington would the fact that it was raining buckets have no bearing at all on the playing of outdoor sports.

"Yes, ma’am, that's the plan." She didn't look surprised that I'd told my mother the truth. She might have been listening, though.

"Well, more power to you, I guess."

Charlie laughed, and Edythe joined in.

"Okay." I stood up. "Enough humor at my expense. Let's go." I walked back to the hall and pulled on my jacket. They followed.

"Not too late, Bell."

"Don't worry, Charlie, I'll have her home early," Edythe promised.

"You take care of my girl, all right?"

I groaned, but they ignored me.

"She'll be safe with me, I promise."

Charlie couldn't doubt Edythe's sincerity, it rang in every word.

I stalked out. They both laughed, and Edythe followed me.

I stopped dead on the porch. There, behind my truck, was a monster Jeep. Its tires were higher than my waist. There were metal guards over the headlights and tail-lights, and four large spotlights attached to the crash bar. The hardtop was shiny red.

Charlie let out a low whistle.

"Wear your seat belts," she said after a moment of shocked silence.

Edythe followed me around to my side and opened the door. I gauged the distance to the seat and prepared to jump for it. She sighed, and then lifted me in with one hand. I hoped Charlie didn't notice.

As she went around to the driver's side, at a normal, human pace, I tried to put on my seat belt. But there were too many buckles.

"What's all this?" I asked when she opened the door.

"It's an off-roading harness."

"Uh-oh."

I tried to find the right places for all the buckles to fit, but it wasn't going too quickly. She sighed again and reached over to help me. I was glad that the rain was too heavy to see Charlie clearly on the porch. That meant she couldn't see how Edythe's hands lingered at my neck, brushed along my collarbones. I gave up trying to help her and focused on not hyperventilating.

Edythe turned the key and the engine roared to life. We pulled away from the house.

"This is a… um… big Jeep you have."

"It's Eleanor's. I didn't think you'd want to run the whole way."

"Where do you keep this thing?"

"We remodeled one of the outbuildings into a garage."

"Aren't you going to put on your seat belt?"

She threw me a disbelieving look.

Then something sunk in.

"Run the whole way? As in, we're still going to run part of the way?" My voice edged up a few octaves.

She grinned tightly. "You're not going to run."

"I'm going to be sick."

"I’ll go slower, I promise."

I bit my lip, fighting the panic.

She leaned over to kiss the top of my head, and then sighed. I looked at her, puzzled.

"You smell good in the rain," she explained.

"In a good way, or in a bad way?" I asked cautiously.

She turned to boop my nose with a laugh. "I just said good, silly.”

I don't know how she found her way in the gloom and downpour, but she somehow found a side road that was less of a road and more of a mountain path. For a long while conversation was impossible, because I was bouncing up and down on the seat. She seemed to enjoy the ride, though, smiling hugely the whole way.

And then we came to the end of the road; the trees formed green walls on three sides of the Jeep. The rain was a mere drizzle, slowing every second, the sky brighter through the clouds.

"Sorry, Bella, we have to go on foot from here."

"You know what? I'll just wait here."

"What happened to all your courage? You were extraordinary this morning."

"I haven't forgotten the last time yet." Could it have been only yesterday?

She was around to my side of the car in a blur. She started unbuckling me.

"I'll get those, you go on ahead," I protested.

"Hmmm…" she mused as she quickly finished. "It seems I'm going to have to tamper with your memory."

Before I could react, she pulled me from the Jeep and set my feet on the ground. It was barely misting now; Alice was going to be right.

"Tamper with my memory?" I asked nervously.

"Something like that." She was watching me intently, carefully, but there was humor deep in her eyes. She placed her hands against the Jeep on either side of my head and leaned forward, forcing me to press back against the door. She leaned in even closer, her face inches from mine. I had no room to escape.

"Now," she breathed, and just her smell disturbed my thought processes, "what exactly are you worrying about?"

"Well, um, hitting a tree —" I gulped "— and dying. And then getting sick."

She fought back a smile. Then she bent her head down and touched her cool lips softly to the hollow at the base of my throat.

"Are you still worried now?" she murmured against my skin.

"Yes." I struggled to concentrate. "About hitting trees and getting sick."

Her nose drew a line up the skin of my throat to the point of my chin. Her cold breath tickled my skin.

"And now?" Her lips whispered against my jaw.

"Trees," I gasped. "Motion sickness."

She lifted her face to kiss my eyelids. "Bella, you don't really think I would hit a tree, do you?"

"No, but I might." There was no confidence in my voice. She smelled an easy victory.

She kissed slowly down my cheek, stopping just at the corner of my mouth. "Would I let a tree hurt you?" Her lips barely brushed against my trembling lower lip.

"No," I breathed. I knew there was a second part to my brilliant defense, but I couldn't quite call it back.

"You see," she said, her lips moving against mine. "There's nothing to be afraid of, is there?"

"No," I sighed, giving up.

Then she took my face in her hands gently, and kissed me in earnest, her lips moving against mine.

I couldn't seem to stop from reacting exactly as I had the first time. Instead of keeping motionless, my arms reached up to twine tightly around her neck. I sighed, and my lips parted.

"Bella!" she broke off, gasping. "You'll be the death of me, I swear you will."

I leaned over, bracing my hands against my knees for support. "You're indestructible," I mumbled, trying to catch my breath.

"I might have believed that before I met you. Now let's get out of here before I do something stupid," she growled, but her smile was playful.

She turned and crouched in front of me so I could climb onto her back like before. I locked my legs around her waist and secured my arms in a choke hold around her neck.

"Don't forget to close your eyes," she warned.

I quickly tucked my face into her shoulder blade, under my own arm, and squeezed my eyes shut.

And I could hardly tell we were moving. I could feel her gliding along beneath me, but she could have been strolling down the sidewalk, the movement was so smooth. I was tempted to peek, just to see if she was really flying through the forest like before, but I resisted. It wasn't worth that awful dizziness. I contented myself with listening to her breath come and go evenly.

I wasn't quite sure we had stopped until she reached back and touched my hair.

"It's over, Bella."

I dared to open my eyes, and, sure enough, we were at a standstill. I stiffly unlocked my stranglehold on her body and started slipping to the ground, but before I could land on my backside on the cold wet ground I felt Edythe’s arms around me.

“Maybe next time I should carry you like this,” she said, sounding a bit worried as she held me bridal style, letting my cramped limbs start to relax.

“Maybe next time I’ll be used to it?” I say weakly, trying to make her smile.

“Don’t joke, I really worry about you sometimes. And I’m sorry I was so impatient I made you do that instead of just walking. I keep forgetting- I’m not used to being around humans, especially ones as fragile as you are.”

She took my hand, holding it to her lips for a quick second, but enough to get my poor heart racing again after I thought it had started to calm down.

“I’m not- fragile. I’m just different.”

“Yes, sorry. I didn’t mean to talk down to you. You are your own, amazing, unique person, and I apologize for not listening to you well enough. Will you tell me in the future if I’m being callous or expecting things from you that would be normal to someone with our ‘superpowers’ but ridiculous for normal people?” I could tell she was trying to make air quotes with her fingers despite holding me and it made me chuckle.

“Yes, I will tell you. Thank you. You don’t know how much that means to me, since people constantly try to tell me what I should or shouldn’t feel, that I can’t possibly be in pain, that it can’t possibly be this bad- even doctors. Like, I know my own condition, I’ve been living with it for most of my conscious life. That does not at all compare with your one or two lectures in med school.”

"I love you," she said. "It's not an excuse for how I’ve been acting, but it's still true."

It was the first time she'd said she loved me — and I’d really understood it. She smiled down at me and it gave me a kind of feeling of safety I hadn’t had in a while, not since my family was all together. 

"You promised Chief Swan that you would have me home early, remember? We'd better get going." I broke the silence, feeling a little awkward.

"Yes, ma'am. Do you think you’re okay to walk?”

“Yeah, thanks.”

She smiled wistfully and released all of me but one hand. She led me a few feet through the tall, wet ferns and draping moss, around a massive hemlock tree, and we were there, on the edge of an enormous open field in the lap of the Olympic peaks. It was twice the size of any baseball stadium.

I could see the others all there; Alice, Eleanor, Leah and Rosalie, sitting on a bare outcropping of rock, were the closest to us, maybe a hundred yards away. Much farther out I could see two more people I couldn’t make out, at least a quarter of a mile apart, appearing to throw something back and forth, but I never saw any ball. It looked like Jasper was marking bases, but could they really be that far apart?

When we came into view, the four on the rocks rose.

Alice started toward us. Eleanor followed after a long look at Rosalie's back; Rosalie had risen gracefully and strode off toward the field without a glance in our direction. My stomach quivered uneasily in response.

"Was that you we heard, Edythe?" Alice asked as she approached.

"It sounded like someone wheezing," Eleanor clarified.

I replied hesitantly to Alice. "That was me."

"Human lungs. I forgot and took it a bit too fast." Edythe explained, quickly settling the score.

One of the people throwing the ball back and forth had left her position and was running toward us. She hurtled to a sudden stop at our feet and I recognized Julie. "It's time," she announced.

As soon as she spoke, a deep rumble of thunder shook the forest beyond us, and then crashed westward toward town.

"Eerie, isn't it?" Eleanor said with easy familiarity, winking at me.

"Let's go." Alice reached for Julie’s hand and they darted toward the oversized field; she ran like a gazelle. She was nearly as graceful and just as fast — yet Julie could never be compared to a gazelle.

"Are you ready for some ball?" Edythe asked, her eyes eager, bright.

She snickered and, after mussing my hair, bounded off after the other two. Her run was more aggressive, a cheetah rather than a gazelle, and she quickly overtook them. The grace and power took my breath away.

"Shall we go down?" Leah asked, and I realized I was staring open-mouthed after Edythe. I quickly reassembled my expression and nodded. She matched her stride to mine without seeming impatient at the pace.

"You don't play with them?" I asked shyly.

"No, I prefer to referee — I like keeping them honest," she explained.

"Do they like to cheat, then?"

"Oh yes — you should hear the arguments they get into! Actually, I hope you don't, you would think they were the wolves and not us."

"Maybe you’re not so different after all." I chuckled.

She raised her eyebrows in surprise and laughed. “Maybe.”

Leah stopped then; apparently, we'd reached the edge of the field. It looked as if they had formed teams. Edythe was far out in left field, Julie stood between the first and second bases, and Alice held the ball, positioned on the spot that must be the pitcher's mound.

Eleanor was swinging an aluminum bat; it whistled almost untraceably through the air. I waited for her to approach home plate, but then I realized, as she took her stance, that she was already there — farther from the pitcher's mound than I would have thought possible. Jasper stood several feet behind her, catching for the other team. Of course, none of them had gloves.

"All right," Leah called in a clear voice, which I knew even Edythe would hear, as far out as she was. "Batter up."

Alice stood straight, deceptively motionless. Her style seemed to be stealth rather than an intimidating windup. She held the ball in both hands at her waist, and then, like the strike of a cobra, her right hand flicked out and the ball smacked into Jasper's hand.

"Was that a strike?" I whispered to Leah.

"If they don't hit it, it's a strike," she told me.

Jasper hurled the ball back to Alice's waiting hand. She permitted herself a brief grin. And then her hand spun out again.

This time the bat somehow made it around in time to smash into the invisible ball. The crack of impact was shattering, thunderous; it echoed off the mountains — I immediately understood the necessity of the thunderstorm.

The ball shot like a meteor above the field, flying deep into the surrounding forest.

"Home run," I murmured.

"Wait," Leah cautioned, listening intently, one hand raised. Eleanor was a blur around the bases, Julie trying to shadow her. I realized Edythe was missing.

"Out!" Leah cried in a clear voice. I stared in disbelief as Edythe sprang from the fringe of the trees, ball in her upraised hand, her wide grin visible even to me.

"Eleanor hits the hardest," Leah explained, "but Edythe runs the fastest."

The inning continued before my incredulous eyes. It was impossible to keep up with the speed at which the ball flew, the rate at which their bodies raced around the field.

I learned the other reason they waited for a thunderstorm to play when Jasper, trying to avoid Edythe's infallible fielding, hit a ground ball toward Alice. Alice ran into the ball, and then raced Jasper to first base. When they collided, the sound was like the crash of two massive falling boulders. I jumped up in concern, but they were somehow unscathed.

"Safe," Leah called in a calm voice.

Eleanor's team was up by one — Rosalie managed to flit around the bases after tagging up on one of Eleanor's long flies — when Edythe caught the third out. She sprinted to my side, sparkling with excitement.

"What do you think?" she asked.

"One thing's for sure, I'll never be able to sit through dull old Major League Baseball again."

"And it sounds like you did so much of that before," she laughed.

"I am a little disappointed," I teased.

"Why?" she asked, puzzled.

"Well, it would be nice if I could find just one thing you didn't do better than everyone else on the planet."

She flashed her strange crooked smile, leaving me breathless. "I'm up," she said, heading for the plate.

She played intelligently, keeping the ball low, out of the reach of Rosalie's always-ready hand in the outfield, gaining two bases like lightning before Eleanor could get the ball back in play. Julie knocked one so far out of the field — with a boom that hurt my ears — that she and Edythe both made it in. Alice slapped them very loud high fives.

The score constantly changed as the game continued, and they razzed each other like any street ballplayers as they took turns with the lead. Occasionally Leah would call them to order. The thunder rumbled on, but we stayed dry, as Alice had predicted.

Julie was up to bat, Edythe catching, when Alice suddenly gasped. My eyes were on Edythe, as usual, and I saw her head snap up to look at her. Their eyes met and something flowed between them in an instant. She was at my side before the others could ask Alice what was wrong.

"Alice?" Leah’s voice was tense.

"I didn't see — I couldn't tell," she whispered.

All the others were gathered by this time.

"What is it, Alice?" Julie asked with a calm voice of authority.

"They were traveling much quicker than I thought. I can see I had the perspective wrong before," she murmured.

Jasper leaned over her, her posture protective. "What changed?" she asked.

"They heard us playing, and it changed their path," she said, contrite, as if she felt responsible for whatever had frightened her.

Seven pairs of quick eyes flashed to my face and away.

"How soon?" Leah said, turning toward Edythe.

A look of intense concentration crossed her face.

"Less than five minutes. They're running — they want to play." She scowled.

"Can you make it?" Julie asked her, her eyes flicking toward me again.

"No, not carrying —" She cut short. "Besides, the last thing we need is for them to catch the scent and start hunting."

"How many?" Eleanor asked Alice.

"Three," she answered tersely.

"Three!" she scoffed. "Let them come." The steel bands of muscle flexed along her massive arms.

For a split second that seemed much longer than it really was, Edythe deliberated. Only Eleanor seemed unperturbed; the rest stared at Edythe’s face with anxious eyes. She glanced at Julie, who nodded.

"Let's just continue the game," Edythe finally decided. Her voice was cool and level. "Alice said they were simply curious."

All this was said in a flurry of words that lasted only a few seconds. I had listened carefully and caught most of it, though I couldn't hear what Julie now asked Edythe with a silent vibration of her lips. I only saw the slight shake of her head and the look of relief on her face before she bounded away, Leah following until there were only dark blurs between the trees and then gone.

"You catch, Jasper," she said. "I'll call it." And she planted herself in front of me.

The others returned to the field, warily sweeping the dark forest with their sharp eyes. Alice and Eleanor seemed to orient themselves around where I stood.

"Take your hair down," Edythe said in a low, even voice. I obediently slid the rubber band out of my hair and shook it out around me.

I stated the obvious. "The others are coming now."

"Yes, stay very still, keep quiet, and don't move from my side, please."

She hid the stress in her voice well, but I could hear it. She pulled my long hair forward, around my face.

"That won't help," Alice said softly. "I could smell her across the field. But the wolves might confuse them."

"I don’t know." A hint of frustration colored her tone.

Jasper stood at the plate, and the others joined the game halfheartedly.

"What did Julie ask you?" I whispered.

She hesitated for a second before she answered. "Whether they were thirsty," she muttered unwillingly.

The seconds ticked by; the game progressed with apathy now. No one dared to hit harder than a bunt, and Eleanor, Rosalie, and Jasper hovered in the infield. Now and again, despite the fear that numbed my brain, I was aware of Rosalie's eyes on me. They were expressionless, but something about the way she held her mouth made me think she was angry. Edythe paid no attention to the game at all, eyes and mind ranging the forest.

"I'm sorry, Bella," she muttered fiercely. "It was stupid, irresponsible, to expose you like this. I'm so sorry."

I heard her breath stop, and her eyes zeroed in on right field. She took a half step, angling herself between me and what was coming.

Alice, Eleanor, and the others turned in the same direction, hearing sounds of passage much too faint for my ears.

A/N: please do let me know if you find any typos or awkward bits I’ve missed! I hope you enjoyed

[twifeordeath]

Chapter 19 Changes (12-13-18)

bringing these updates back!! because I think they’re cool but up until last night I didn’t even know they were a thing (i kinda feel bad for not doing them for the other chapters I’ve edited, but jsyk I wrote the entire scene of Edythe in Bella’s bedroom from scratch)

basic summary of changes for this chapter:

rewrote the entire Bella/Charlie conversation. like seriously there are so many ways she could have convinced Charlie to be okay with her going with Alice that did not include being so goddamn cruel

i momentarily forgot Edythe was shorter than Bella and therefore cannot tuck her under her arm. let me know if you noticed I’ve missed a similar thing that somewhere else? i need to do a reread soon anyway i might as well keep an eye out for that

added in the thing about the pipes in the school bursting (more like Rosalie and Jasper sneaking into the school to break them), thank @melsheartsthings from discord for that lovely idea

dear god Edythe why the hell would you switch places with Bella like that while she was driving, thats fucking terrifying (sidenote: how can someone have long hands?)

god i keep forgetting this is all in past tense im so used to writing in present

okay im really confused. does Eleanor jump on top of the goddamn car? and Edythe doesn’t even think about warning Bella? wtf

removed the little section about how she smells to Edythe, blah blah blah we already chalked that up to Edythe not knowing what it felt like to be attracted to someone. maybe she’s demi honestly idk

will they ever stop manhandling Bella without even giving her a warning? this time it’s Eleanor. and then Esme. and then Esme and Alice. y i k e s

I’m not changing Rosalie’s reaction. i think we’ve established she’s frustrated at Bella because she doesn’t think she realizes the danger she’s in, and the advantages of being human she ready to give up. and in this case specifically angry the danger Bella is putting Eleanor in. though I will be rewriting their relationship further on hopefully

god i have to copypaste this- its just ridiculous

“She caught me up in her iron grip, crushing me to her. She seemed unaware of her watching family as she pulled my face to hers, lifting my feet off the floor. For the shortest second, her lips were icy and hard against mine. Then it was over. She set me down, still holding my face, her glorious eyes burning into mine.”

what the fuckkkkkk please no stop there is so much wrong in this paragraph im scrapping the whole thing and writing a cute hug and maybe a kiss not this monstrocity

how can a tear streak noisily down someone’s face??

[twifeordeath]

Twife or Death: Lesbian Twilight Chapter 15

Updated as of 6-4-17 (previous) (all chapters)

 All rights belong to Stephenie Meyer, and this project is non-profit and fan entertainment.Thank you to Laura G, Devyn L, Birdy E, Naoya, Liz B, Caitlin L, Jordyn, Breanna P, Amanda L, Gabrielle P, Nobbie A, Tori K, goddessayem, smallnark, Julia F, Mol M, Dyma S, Rose I, Tess KC, Maria K, Rachel E, Kathleen K, Katie G, Brittany E, Elizabeth E, Imp, Amy L, Robin SG, and the project admin Alina G.

 Chapter 15. THE CULLENS

The muted light of yet another cloudy day woke me. I lay with my arm across my eyes, groggy and dazed. A pleasant, foggy memory stirred in my consciousness, like a dream trying to be remembered. I groaned and rolled onto my side, hoping more sleep would come. Then the previous day flooded my memories.

 "Oh!" I sat up so fast it made my head spin.

 "Good morning sleeping beauty." Her soft voice came from the rocking chair in the corner.

"Edythe! You stayed!" I cried, and threw myself across the room and into her lap, startling her. In the instant that my thoughts caught up with my actions, I froze, shocked by my own uncontrolled enthusiasm. She just laughed.

 "Of course," she answered, seeming pleased by my reaction. Her hands rubbed my back. I laid my head against her shoulder, breathing in the smell of her.

 "I was sure it was a dream."

 "I’m not that rude to ditch you in the middle of the night," she scoffed.

 I tilted my head up, wanting to kiss her. Then I remembered the unfortunate problem called morning breath.

 “I need a minute to get ready,” I said, pulling myself out of her arms.

 She shrugged. “I’ll wait.”

 I practically skipped to the bathroom, giddy, and I found myself facing a stranger in the mirror. My eyes were too bright, and there were shades of blush on my cheeks that were apparent even with my dark skin. I worked to make sense of the chaos that was my hair. I brushed my teeth and splashed my face with cold water. I tried to breathe normally, tried to calm the bubbling happiness inside of me with no noticeable success. I half-ran back to my room.

 She was there, waiting patiently in the rocking chair. She reached out to me, and my heart thumped unsteadily.

 "Welcome back," she murmured, taking me into her arms. I eased my head onto her chest as calmly as I could, trying hard to ignore the butterflies inside.

 We sat in each other’s arms, enjoying the other’s company without a need for words. I noticed that her clothes were changed and her hair combed smooth.

 "You left?" I asked, touching the collar of her fresh shirt.

 Her fingers found mine as she grinned. "I could hardly leave in the clothes I came in — what would the neighbors think?"

 I laughed. “Always thinking ahead—” I looked away, face already flaming from my next words, “—that’s what I love about you.”

 She blinked, then giggled. I glanced at her. Her golden eyes were very soft, “I love you too, Bella.”

 “So, breakfast?” I ventured. She nodded, and we headed down the stairs, hand in hand.

 Charlie had already left for work, so it was just me and her. The kitchen was bright and happy, reflecting my mood.

 "What's for breakfast?" I asked pleasantly.

 That threw her for a minute.

 "Er, I'm not sure. What would you like?" Her brow crinkled.

 I grinned. "That's all right, I fend for myself pretty well. Watch me hunt." I hopped up from my seat as she rolled her eyes.

 I found a bowl and a box of cereal. I could feel her eyes on me as I poured the milk and grabbed a spoon. It made me wonder if I was being rude, not offering my guest anything. I sat my food on the table, and then paused.

 "Can I get you anything?" I asked, just for the sake of politeness.

 "No, it’s okay, Bella. Eat.”

 I sat at the table, watching her as I took a bite. She was gazing at me with a smile. I cleared my throat to distract her.

 "What's on the agenda for today?" I asked.

 "Hmmm…" I watched her frame her answer carefully. "Would you like to meet my family?"

 I gulped.

 “Are we already at that stage of the relationship?" This made her giggle. “I- I don’t know how I feel about the idea.”

 "Are you afraid of them?" She sounded worried. “They won’t hurt you, and you don’t have to go if you don’t feel comfortable.”

 "I'm not afraid of them," I explained. "I'm afraid they won't… like me. Won't they be, well, surprised that you would bring someone… a human… home to meet them? Do they know that I know about them?"

 "Oh, they already know everything. They'd taken bets yesterday, you know," she smiled, "on whether you’d come over, though why anyone would bet against Alice, I can't imagine. At any rate, we don't have secrets in the family. It's not really feasible, since we’ve known and trusted each other for hundreds of years."

 "Did Alice see me coming?"

 Her reaction was strange. "Something like that," she said uncomfortably, turning away so I couldn't see her eyes. I stared at her curiously.

 "I’d like to meet your mother too..."

 "You already met," I reminded her.

 "As your girlfriend, I mean."

 I stared at her with surprise. "Would you like to? I mean, are you okay with..."

 "Isn't that customary?" she asked shyly.

 "I don't know. I think Charlie would be happy," I admitted. My dating history gave me few reference points to work with.

 "That's not necessary, you know. I don't expect you to… I mean, you don't have to…”" I searched for the word. “You don’t have to expose yourself for me. Your family took pains to blend in, and officially becoming my girlfriend might make that difficult.”

 Her smile was patient. "I’ll be alright, don’t worry."

 I pushed the remains of my cereal around the edges of the bowl, biting my lip.

 "You don’t have to tell Charlie if it makes you nervous." She said gently. “But I would love to be your girlfriend to your mother, not just a classmate.”

 "Does that make us official?" I suppressed the sudden thrill in my chest, heart beating fast again.

 She frowned. "Wait. I thought we were already dating."

 “Were we?” I looked at her with innocent eyes. “Neither of us never actually asked.”

 The dawning horror on her face made me giggle. “I’m not used to this,” she said, exasperated. “I got excited and assumed… oh my god…”

 "I was under the impression that you were something more, actually," I confessed, looking at the table to save her the embarrassment.

 "Well..." Edythe paused, then faced me awkwardly. I cupped my chin in my hands and waited. "Bella Swan,” she said slowly, “would you be my girlfriend?"

 "Maybe." I said, mischievously. "Will you be my girlfriend??"

 "As long as you want me," she answered, grinning in turn.

 "I'll have to think about it," I said, pretending to be hard to get.

 She walked slowly around the table to where I was sitting, and, pausing next to me, she leaned down and pressed a kiss to my cheek. I tried to stay still, not to show any signs that my heart rate jumped with her touch.

 “Does that help to convince you?” Her murmur was soft in my ears.

 I turned my head so I could fully see her face, and pecked her on the lips. “Yup.”

 I could see in her expression that she had expected it, but was not prepared for it. She stared into my face for a while, her expression a mix of adoration and bashfulness. Then she realized I could see it, and quickly turned away with an embarrassed clearing of her throat.

 “Are you finished?” She finally asked.

 I jumped up. “Yes.”

 “You should go get dressed. I’ll, uh, wait here.” She still refused to look at me. If only she wasn’t undead, I thought to myself. I would have loved to see her flustered blush.

 It was hard to decide what to wear. I doubted there were any etiquette books detailing how to dress when your vampire girlfriend takes you home to meet her vampire family. I wondered if I wasn’t the only one who have faced this predicament. The thought of another girl with a vampire girlfriend, struggling to dress to impress the future in-laws, made me laugh and cheered me enormously.

 I ended up black jeans, the ones that had the least tears in them, and a dark blue plaid button-up she’d once complimented. A quick glance in the mirror told me my hair was entirely impossible, so I pulled it back into a ponytail.

 "Okay." I bounced down the stairs. "I'm decent."

 She was waiting at the foot of the stairs, closer than I'd thought, and I bounded right into her. She steadied me, holding me steady for a few moments to see if I was dizzy, and then with a  smile pulled me closer.

 "Wrong again," she murmured in my ear. "You are utterly indecent — no one should look so tempting, it's not fair."

 It seems I could feel my blush spread all the way to my ears as I ducked my head. Ignoring myself, I huffed, “You just asked me out a few minutes ago, and now you’re trying to seduce me? You’re more of a U-Haul girl than I expected.”

 She snorted, then pressed her lips delicately to my forehead.

 "Shall I explain how you are tempting me?" she said, winking. It was clearly a rhetorical question. Her fingers traced slowly down my spine, her breath coming tenderly against my skin. I wrapped my arms around her neck and looked in her golden eyes. She tilted her head slowly and touched her lips to mine, very carefully, parting them slightly.

 I pretended to swoon, hand to forehead and everything.

 "Bella?" Her voice was half-laughing  as she caught me and held me up.

 "You… made… me… faint," I accused her.

 "What am I going to do with you?" she groaned in joking exasperation. "Yesterday I kiss you, and you attack me! Today you’re passing out on me!"

 I laughed, letting her arms support me as I leaned against her.

 "So much for being good at everything," she sighed.

 "That's the problem." I touched her lips with my finger. "You're too good. Far, far too good."

 "Should I not kiss you again then?" she asked; she already knew what my answer was.

 I pouted. "I just forgot to breathe that time. That doesn’t mean you should stop.”

 "I can't take you anywhere like this."

 "I'll be fine," I said. “I’ll remember to breathe next time.”

 Edythe smiled at me, immeasurable fondness in her eyes.. "You’re very cute when you’re cheeky," she said unexpectedly. I felt my face flush, and looked away.

 "Look.” I took a deep breath, then let it out. “If you want to go meet your family, we should go. At this rate I’m afraid I might stay here with you all day. Unless you’d like to—?” I raised an eyebrow.

 She studied my face. "I can see your bravado, you know.”

 “You could tell?”

 ”You're still worried, not because you're headed to meet a houseful of vampires, but because you think those vampires won't approve of you, correct?"

 "That's right," I answered immediately, hiding my surprise at her casual use of the word.

 Edythe shook her head with a smile. "You're incredible." She touched my cheek gently. “They’ll love you, don’t worry.”

 I bit my lips and nodded. She offered me her hand and I gratefully accepted it, then we walked out to the car.

 I realized, as she drove us out of the main part of town, that I had no idea where she lived. We passed over the bridge at the Calawah River, the road winding northward, the houses flashing past us growing farther apart, getting bigger. And then we were past the other houses altogether, driving through a misty forest. I was trying to decide whether to ask or be patient when she turned abruptly onto an unpaved road. It was unmarked, barely visible among the ferns. The forest encroached on both sides, leaving the road ahead only discernible for a few meters as it twisted, serpentlike, around the ancient trees.

 And then, after a few miles, there was some thinning of the woods, and we were suddenly in a small meadow, or was it actually a lawn? The gloom of the forest didn't relent, though, for there were six primordial cedars that shaded an entire acre with their vast sweep of branches. The trees held their protecting shadow right up to the walls of the house that rose among them, making obsolete the deep porch that wrapped around the first story.

 I had expected a castle like those in Dracula movies, completed with thunder and ominous music, or maybe a log cabin for something this far into the woods, but it definitely wasn't that. The house was peaceful, lovely, and three stories tall. The color was a soft shade of white that complemented the surrounding palette of brown wood and leafy greens. The wide windows and door designs were tastefully chosen to match the atmosphere of the surrounding woods, of a newer construction style. My truck was the only car in sight, but I saw garage doors on the bottom story. I could hear the river close by, hidden in the obscurity of the forest.

 "Wow."

 "Do you like it?" Edythe asked nervously.

 "It’s very charming."

 She breathed a sigh of relief. Apparently I wasn’t the only one worried about me coming here.

 Edythe got out first, then walked over to my side of the car. "Ready?" she asked, opening my door for me.

 "Not even a little bit — let's go." I took a deep breath, but it seemed to get stuck in my throat. I touched my hair nervously.

 "You look lovely." She took my hand easily, without thinking about it.

 We walked through the deep shade up to the porch. I knew she could feel my tension; her thumb rubbed soothing circles into the back of my hand.

 She opened the door for me.

 The inside was a continuation of the feel of the exterior. It was very bright, very open, and very large. This must have originally been several rooms, but the walls had been removed from most of the first floor to create one wide space. The back, south-facing wall had been entirely replaced with glass, and, beyond the shade of the cedars, the lawn stretched bare to the wide river. A massive curving staircase dominated the west side of the room. The walls, the high-beamed ceiling, the wooden floors, and the thick carpets were all varying shades of being and brown. Waiting to greet us, standing just to the left of the door, on a raised portion of the floor by a spectacular grand piano, were Edythe's parents. From the way they stood, I realized they must have made an effort to plan out their exact position and pose. Their expressions, when Edythe first opened the door, were the perfect masks of patience. Then they saw me, and the excitement leapt into their faces. I realized then that I had nothing to fear from Edythe’s parents. My nervousness evaporated, and I stepped forward to greet them.

 I'd seen Dr. Cullen before, of course, yet I couldn't help but be struck again by her youth, the lack of lines and wrinkles expected of a woman of her supposed age. At her side was Esme, I assumed, the only one of the family I'd never seen before. Esme was an Indian woman, with the same golden eyes and dark circles surrounding them as the rest of Cullens. Something about her heart-shaped face, her billows of soft, dark hair, reminded me of the quiet elegance of the silent-movie era. She was small and slender next to her tall, broad wife. They smiled warmly at me, but made no move to approach us. Trying not to frighten me, I guessed.

 "Carine, Esme," Edythe's voice broke the short silence, "this is Bella."

 "You're very welcome, Bella." Carine's step was measured, careful as she approached me. She raised her hand tentatively, and I stepped forward to shake hands with her.

 "It's nice to see you again, Dr. Cullen."

 "Please, call me Carine."

 "Carine." I repeated, smiling at her. I could feel Edythe's relief at my side.

 Esme smiled and stepped forward as well, reaching for my hand. Her kindly grasp was just as I expected.

 "It's very nice to meet you," she said sincerely. “I was wondering when Edythe would bring you over.”

 "Thank you. I'm glad to meet you, too." And I was. I couldn’t remember, why had I been afraid of the disapproval of Edythe’s parents? They were just reacting like Renee and Charlie might if it was me bringing Edythe home. I saw only warmth and love in their eyes.

 "Where are Alice and Jasper?" Edythe asked, but no one answered, as they had just appeared at the top of the wide staircase.

 "Hey, Edythe!" Alice called enthusiastically. She ran down the stairs, a streak of black hair and brown skin, coming to a sudden and graceful stop in front of me. Carine and Esme shot warning glances at her, but I liked it. It felt natural — for her, anyway.

 "Hi, Bella!" Alice said, and she bounced forward to kiss my cheek. If Carine and Esme had looked cautious before, they now looked shocked.

 Alice was so cheerful I couldn’t help but smile. Carine and Esme, noticing my pleased expression, relaxed considerably.

 "You look great," she commented, to my extreme embarrassment.

 Jasper stood a few feet back behind Alice — tall and leonine. A feeling of ease spread through me, and I was more comfortable. Edythe stared at Jasper, raising one eyebrow, and I remembered what Jasper could do.

 "Hello, Bella," Jasper said. She kept her distance, not offering to shake my hand. But it was impossible to feel awkward near her.

 "Hello, Jasper." I smiled at her shyly, and then at the others. "It's nice to meet you all — you have a very beautiful home," I added conventionally.

 "Thank you," Esme said. "We're so glad that you came." She spoke with affection, and I realized I was already included in the family.

 Rosalie and Eleanor were nowhere to be seen, and I wondered about Edythe's too-innocent denial when I'd asked her if the others didn't like me.

 Carine's expression distracted me from this train of thought; she was gazing meaningfully at Edythe with an intense expression. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Edythe nod once.

 I looked away, trying to be polite and leave them to their mental conversation. My eyes wandered again to the beautiful instrument on the platform by the door. I remembered my childhood fantasy that, should I ever win a lottery, I would buy a grand piano for Renée. She wasn't a professional — she only played for herself on our secondhand upright — but I loved to watch her play. She was happy when she was by the piano, absorbed in the music — she seemed like a new, mysterious being to me then, someone outside the "mom" persona I took for granted. She'd put me through lessons, of course, but like most kids, I whined until she let me quit.

 Esme noticed my interest.

 "Do you play?" she asked, inclining her head toward the piano.

 I shook my head. "Not at all. My mom, Renee, does though. It's so beautiful. Is it yours?"

 "Used to be," she laughed. "My interest have always been more in much, much older musical instruments, preferably from old civilizations. Carine and Jasper dabble, but it’s mostly Edythe’s now. Did Edythe tell you she was musical?"

 "No." I glanced at her. "I thought she would have accidentally broken it."

 Esme raised her eyebrows in confusion.

 "Edythe can stop a van, right?" I explained.

 Jasper snickered and Esme gave Edythe a reproving look.

 "I hope you haven't been showing off— it's rude," Esme scolded.

 "Just a bit," Edythe laughed freely. Her face softened at the sound, and they shared a brief look of affection.

 "She's been too modest, actually," I said. “I wish I could have heard her play.”

 "Well, play for her," Esme encouraged.

 "You just said showing off was rude," Edythe objected.

 "There are exceptions to every rule," Esme replied promptly.

 "I'd like to hear you play," I innocently volunteered, trying not to giggle.

 "It's settled then." Esme nudged Edythe toward the piano, who rolled her eyes then took a seat. I hesitated, standing next to the piano. Then Edythe motioned me towards the spot on the bench next to her, and I shyly sat down.

 She gave me a dramatic exasperated yet teasing look before she turned to the keys. And then her fingers flowed swiftly across the ivory and the room was filled with a composition so complex, so luxuriant, it was impossible to believe only one set of hands played. I felt myself lean closer to her, my eyes transfixed upon her hands on the keys.

 Edythe looked at me casually, the music still surging around us without a break, and winked. "Do you like it?"

 "You wrote this?" I gasped, understanding.

 She nodded. "It's Esme's favorite."

 I closed my eyes, drinking in the sound with every part of my being.

 The music slowed, transforming into something softer, and to my surprise I detected the melody of her lullaby weaving through the profusion of notes.

 "You inspired this one," she said softly. The music grew unbearably sweet.

 I couldn't speak, but I could feel the blood rushing to my cheeks.

 "They like you, you know," she said conversationally. "Esme especially."

 I glanced behind me, but the huge room was empty now.

 "Where did they go?"

 "Very subtly giving us some privacy, I suppose." That made me snort.

 Thinking of the Cullens reminded me of the two that weren’t here, and my doubts flooded back. I sighed. "They like me. But Rosalie and Eleanor…" I trailed off, not sure how to express my doubts.

 Her eyes widened. "I forgot to tell you," she said, stopping and hitting her forehead with her palm. "They’re not here not because of you."

 I pursed my lips skeptically. "Really?"

 "They’re with the Black pack," Edythe continued. “Julie and Sethe were helping Rosalie with fixing her car earlier. They’re testing it out right now; they’ll probably be back soon.”

 The Black pack? “Wait,” I furrowed my brows, “is there something I’m missing here?”

 “I think that’s something Julie should tell you herself,” Edythe replied.

 I had an inkling of what Edythe was hinting at, but let the subject drop. It would be better to hear it from Julie.

 “Are Rosalie and Eleanor truly alright with me, though?” I had to make sure.

 Edythe frowned. “Well, Eleanor thinks I’m nuts, rushing everything, but she doesn’t have a problem with you.  And Rosalie…” She struggled for a while. “Don’t worry about Rosalie.”

 "What is it that upsets her?" I wasn't sure if I wanted to know the answer.

 She sighed deeply. "Rosalie struggles the most with… with what we are. She’s the most cautious out of all of us about not getting discovered, so she doesn’t trust you yet. And she’s a little jealous."

 "Rosalie is jealous of me?" I asked, surprised. I couldn’t think of a single reason why.

 "You're human. She wishes that she was human, too. Or still was." Edythe looked into my eyes. “Being a vampire isn’t exactly a blessing.”

 "What about Esme and Carine… ?" I asked, still slightly upset.

 Edythe took my hand in hers, reassuring me. "They’re happy to see me happy. Carine met you before, and has liked you since. They think you’re a trustworthy girl, and Esme is happy that I found someone who I love.” She smiled. “I wish you could have read their thoughts and saw how anxious and elated they were when we arrived. Guess parents don’t change whether they’re human or vampires."

 "And Alice seems very… enthusiastic."

 "Alice has her own way of looking at things," she said sheepishly.

 I laughed. “I like her.” I smiled at the memory of Carine and Esme’s shock at her greeting. "May I ask what Carine told you before?"

  "You noticed that, did you?"

 "You don’t have to tell me if it’s something private. I was only curious."

 She looked at me thoughtfully for a few seconds before answering. "She wanted to tell me some news — she didn't know if it was something we should share with you."

 "What is it? What’s wrong?"

 "Nothing's wrong, exactly. Alice just sees some visitors coming soon. They know we're here and who we are, and they're curious."

 "Vampires?"

 "Yes… well, they aren't like us, — in their hunting habits, I mean. They probably won't come into town at all, but..."

 I shivered.

 “I won’t let anything happen to you,” she said firmly, arms coming to wrap around me. “My family will be on watch, as well as the Black pack.”

 I leaned into her shoulder, allowing myself to feel safe in her embrace. Finally, I said, “Your house isn’t what I expected at all.”

 "No coffins, no piled skulls in the corners; I don't even think we have cobwebs… what a disappointment this must be for you," she continued slyly.

 I grinned, elbowing her ribs slightly. "The atmosphere so light… so open."

 She was more serious when she answered. "It's the one place we never have to hide."

 Edythe let go of me, though I continue to lean against her, to continue playing where she left off. The song she was still playing, my song, drifted to an end, the final chords shifting to a more melancholy key. The last note hovered poignantly in the silence.

 "Thank you," I murmured. I realized there were tears in my eyes. I dabbed at them, embarrassed.

 She touched the corner of my eye, trapping one I missed. She lifted her finger, examining the drop of moisture broodingly.

 I looked at her questioningly

 “Vampires can’t cry,” she answered. She looked back at me and smiled. "Do you want to see the rest of the house? The others are probably going to be back soon, you might not get a chance to see it then."

 "No coffins?" I asked.

 She laughed, taking my hand, leading me away from the piano. "No coffins," she promised.

 We walked up the massive staircase, my hand trailing along the satin-smooth rail. The long hall at the top of the stairs was paneled with a honey-colored wood, the same as the floorboards.

 "Rosalie and Eleanor's room… Carine's office… Alice's room…" She gestured as she led me past the doors.

 She would have continued, but I stopped dead at the end of the hall, staring incredulously at the ornament hanging on the wall above my head.

 Edythe chuckled at my bewildered expression.

 "You can laugh," she said. "It is sort of ironic."

 I didn't laugh. My hand raised automatically, one finger extended as if to touch the large wooden cross, its dark patina contrasting with the lighter tone of the wall. I didn't touch it, though I was curious if the aged wood would feel as silky as it looked.

 "It must be very old," I guessed.

 She shrugged. "Early sixteen-thirties, more or less."

 I looked away from the cross to stare at her. "Why do you keep this here?" I wondered.

 "Nostalgia. It belonged to Carine's mother."

 "She collected antiques?" I suggested doubtfully.

 "No. She carved this herself. It hung on the wall above the pulpit in the vicarage where she preached."

 I wasn't sure if my face betrayed my shock, but I returned to gazing at the simple, ancient cross, just in case. I quickly did the mental math; the cross was over three hundred and seventy years old. The silence stretched on as I struggled to wrap my mind around the concept of so many years.

 "Are you alright?" She sounded worried.

 "How old is Carine?" I asked quietly, ignoring her question, still staring up.

 "She just celebrated her three hundred and sixty-second birthday," Edythe said. I looked back at her, a million questions in my eyes.

 She watched me carefully as she spoke. "Carine was born in London, in the sixteen-forties, she believes. Time wasn't marked as accurately back then, for the common people anyway. It was just before Cromwell's rule, though."

 I kept my face composed, aware of her scrutiny as I listened. It was easier if I thought it was just a story for now.

 "She was the only daughter of an Anglican pastor. Her mom died giving birth to her, and her mother, the pastor, was an intolerant woman. As the Protestants came into power, she was enthusiastic in her persecution of Roman Catholics and other religions. She also believed very strongly in the reality of evil. She led hunts for witches, werewolves… and vampires." I grew very still at the word. I'm sure she noticed, but she went on without pausing. "They burned a lot of innocent people — of course the real creatures that he sought were not so easy to catch.”

 "When the pastor grew old, she placed her obedient daughter in charge of the raids. At first Carine was a disappointment; she was not quick to accuse, to see demons where they did not exist. But she was persistent, and more clever than her mother. She actually discovered a coven of true vampires that lived hidden in the sewers of the city, only coming out by night to hunt. In those days, when monsters were not just myths and legends, that was the way many lived.”

 "The people gathered their pitchforks and torches, of course" — her brief laugh was darker now — "and waited where Carine had seen the monsters exit into the street. Eventually one emerged."

 Her voice was very quiet; I strained to catch the words.

 "She must have been ancient, and weak with hunger. Carine heard her call out in Latin to the others when she caught the scent of the mob. She ran through the streets, and Carine — she was twenty-three and very fast — was in the lead of the pursuit. The creature could have easily outrun them, but Carine thinks she was too hungry, so she turned and attacked. She fell on Carine first, but the others were close behind, and she turned to defend herself. She killed two men, and made off with a third, leaving Carine bleeding in the street."

 She paused. I could sense she was editing, probably omitting parts that she thought would scare me.

 "Carine knew what her mother would do. The bodies would be burned — anything infected by the monster must be destroyed. Carine acted instinctively to save her own life. She crawled away from the alley while the mob followed the fiend and her victim. She hid in a cellar, buried herself in rotting potatoes for three days. It's a miracle she was able to keep silent, to stay undiscovered.”

 "It was over then, and she realized what she had become."

 I'm not sure what my face was revealing, but she suddenly broke off.

 "How are you feeling?" she asked.

 "I'm fine," I assured her. And, though I bit my lip in hesitation, she must have seen the curiosity burning in my eyes.

 She smiled. "I expect you have a few more questions for me."

 "A few."

 Her smile widened, brilliant. She started back down the hall, gesturing for me to come. I followed, curiosity burning now. "We have time. Come on, then," she encouraged. "It’s better that you ask the woman yourself."

[twifeordeath]

hey guys i’m sorry, but i’m going through a depressive episode and won’t be able to take the reigns for editing and organizing for at least a month or so i’m still in the discord chat and will answer any questions/give admin privileges (anything short of rewriting/organizing. i can do a final readthrough but it looks like the next few chapters need some rewriting) if people are willing to pick up where i’ve left off hope you’re all doing okay 💜

[twifeordeath]

Twife or Death: Lesbian Twilight Chapter 14

Updated as of 1-23-17 (previous) (all chapters)

All rights belong to Stephenie Meyer, and this project is non-profit and fan entertainment.Thank you to Laura G, Devyn L, Birdy E, Naoya, Liz B, Caitlin L, Jordyn, Breanna P, Amanda L, Gabrielle P, Nobbie A, Tori K, goddessayem, smallnark, Julia F, Mol M, Dyma S, Rose I, Tess KC, Maria K, Rachel E, Kathleen K, Katie G, Brittany E, Elizabeth E, Imp, Amy L, Robin SG, and the project admins, Alina G and B Bordeaux.

14. MIND OVER MATTER

She could drive well when she kept the speed reasonable, I had to admit. Like so many things, it seemed to be effortless for her. She barely looked at the road, yet the tires never deviated so much as an inch from the center of the lane. She drove one-handed, with the other hand holding mine.

Sometimes she gazed into the setting sun, sometimes she glanced at me — my face, my hair blowing out the open window, our hands twined together. She had turned the radio to an oldies station and started singing along with a song that sounded vaguely familiar. She knew every line.

“You like fifties music?” I asked, hazarding a guess.

“Music in the fifties was good. Much better than the sixties, or the seventies, ugh!” She shuddered. “The eighties were bearable.”

Her comment stirred my curiosity. “How did you… how did you become a vampire?” I asked cautiously, not wanting to upset her buoyant humor by stirring up painful memories.

“Does it matter much?” Her smile, to my relief, remained unclouded.

“No, but I still wonder…” I frowned. “I would like to learn more about you, if you are okay with it…”

“I wonder if it will upset you,” she reflected to herself. She gazed ahead, avoiding my eyes.

“It won’t. I think.” I replied. “Maybe you could simplify, or just focus on emotions and not actions? It might help…” By now I’ve grown used to it all. Besides, this was Edythe’s life, it couldn’t be as bad as the horror stories Mom broke out around campfires.

She sighed, and then glanced sideways at me, gauging my expression. Whatever she saw there must have encouraged her. She looked forward again — the light of the setting sun glittered off her skin in ruby-tinged sparkles — and spoke.

“I was born in Chicago in 1901.” She paused and glanced at me from the corner of her eyes. My face was carefully neutral, patient for the rest. One side of her lips curved up in a tiny smile and she continued, “Carine found me in a hospital in the summer of 1918. I was seventeen, and dying of the Spanish influenza.”

I felt my sudden intake of breath, though it was barely audible to my own ears. She must have noticed it, because she paused briefly before continuing.

��I don’t remember it well — it was a very long time ago, and I had wanted that particular memory to fade.” She was lost in her thoughts for a short time before she went on. “I do remember how it felt, when Carine saved me. It’s not an easy thing; not something you could forget.”

“Your parents?”

“They had already died from the disease. I was alone. That was why she chose me out of everyone else she could have saved. I wouldn’t have to go through the pain of leaving a loved one behind. And in all the chaos of the epidemic, I began anew without any suspicion.”

“How did she… save you?”

A few seconds passed before she answered. She seemed to choose her words carefully.

“It was difficult. Changing someone requires precision. Not many of us have the restraint necessary to accomplish it. But Carine has always been the most composed, the most skillful in my family… I don’t think you could even find her equal throughout all of history.” She paused. “As for me, it was merely very, very painful.”

I could tell from the hard set of her lips, she would say no more on this subject. I suppressed my interest for her sake, though my mind was far from idle. There were many questions that flashed through my mind about this particular issue, and ideas that were only beginning to occur to me.

Her soft voice interrupted my thoughts. “She had also acted from loneliness, I think. That’s usually the reason that drives vampires when deciding to turn someone. I was the first in Carine’s family, and Esme was the second. Esme fell from a cliff. They brought her straight to the hospital morgue. Somehow her heart was still beating.”

“So you must be dying, then, to become…” We never said the word, and I couldn’t frame it now.

“No, that’s just Carine’s morals. Anyone could be turned. She just would never do that to someone who had another choice. If they were conscious enough, she would ask.” The respect in her voice was profound whenever she spoke of the woman who had become her mother. “It is very difficult though, she says,” she continued, “to possess enough control to turn someone.” She looked at the now-dark road, and I could feel the subject closing again.

“And Eleanor and Rosalie?”

“Carine brought Rosalie into our family next. I never had a sister, and neither had she. We enjoyed each other’s presence tremendously.” She rolled her eyes. “I never realized I could feel such a magnitude of both love and annoyance for a single person. Two years later, Rosalie found Eleanor. She was hunting — we were in Appalachia at the time — and found a bear about to finish Eleanor off. Rosalie carried her back to Carine, more than a hundred miles, afraid she wouldn’t be able to complete the change herself. I’m only beginning to guess how difficult that journey was for her.” She threw a glance in my direction and raised our hands, still folded together, to brush my cheek with the back of her hand.

“But she made it,” I said, encouraging her to continue.

“Yes,” Edythe murmured. “She saw something in Eleanor’s face that made her strong enough. And they’ve been together ever since. Sometimes they live separately from us, as a married couple. But the younger we pretend to be, the longer we can stay in any given place. Forks seemed perfect, so we all enrolled in high school.” She laughed. “I suppose we’ll have to go to their wedding in a few years, again.”

“Alice and Jasper?”

“Alice and Jasper are two very rare creatures. They both developed a conscience, as we refer to it, with no outside guidance. Jasper belonged to another family before she joined us. She… well, that’s her story to tell. Alice found her. Like me, she has certain gifts above and beyond the norm for our kind.”

“Really?” I interrupted, fascinated. “But you said you were the only one who could hear people’s thoughts.”

“That’s true. Alice has a different gift. She sees the future — things that might happen, things that are coming. That’s how I found you that night, in Port Angeles, because she warned me. Her visions are very subjective, however. The future isn’t set in stone. Things change.”

Her jaw set when she said that, and her eyes darted to my face and away so quickly that I wasn’t sure if I only imagined it.

“What other things does she see?”

“She saw Jasper first. I think Alice felt that she was looking for someone before she knew why or who. After she found Jasper she saw Carine and our family, and they came together to find us. She’s most sensitive to non-humans. She always sees, for example, when another group of our kind is coming near. And any threat they may pose.”

“Are there a lot of… your kind?” I was surprised. How many of them could walk among us undetected?

“No, not many. But most won’t settle in any one place. Only those like us, who’ve given up hunting you people” — a sly glance in my direction — “can live together with humans for any length of time. We’ve only found one other family like ours, in a small village in Alaska. We lived together for a time, but there were so many of us that we became too noticeable. Those of us who live… differently tend to band together.”

“And the others?”

“Nomadic clans, for the most part, with some exceptions. We’ve all lived that way at times. It helps to not draw attention to us, especially with our ageless state, but it gets tedious. We run across the others now and then, because there are clans that prefer the North.”

“Why is that?”

We were parked in front of my house now, and she’d turned off the Volvo. It was very quiet and dark; there was no moon. The porch light was off, so I knew my Ma wasn’t home yet.

“Did you not see me this afternoon?” she teased. “Do you think I could walk down the street in the sunlight without causing traffic accidents? There’s a reason why we chose the Olympic Peninsula, one of the most sunless places in the world, though it’s mostly for Carine’s and my sake. The darker our skin is, the less we sparkle. Alice, Jasper, and Eleanor still shimmer, though much less than I do, while Esme and Rosalie only have a light, iridescent halo about them.”

She sighed. “It’s nice to be able to go outside in the day. You wouldn’t believe how tired you can get of nighttime in eighty-odd years.”

“So that’s where the sun-allergic legends came from?”

“Probably.”

I pondered on the thought. “And Alice came from another family, like Jasper?”

“No, that is a mystery to us. Alice doesn’t remember her human life at all. And she doesn’t know who changed her. She awoke alone. Whoever bit her walked away, and none of us understand why, or how, they chose to do so. If she hadn’t had her future sense, if she hadn’t seen Jasper and Carine and known that she would someday become one of us, Alice probably would have been utterly lost.”

There was so much to think through, so much I still wanted to ask. But, to my great embarrassment, my stomach growled. I’d been so intrigued, I forgot I hadn’t eaten yet. I realized now that I was ravenous.

Edythe frowned. “I’m sorry, I’m keeping you from dinner. I’ve never spent so much time around humans. I tend to forget.”

“Still, I want to stay with you a bit longer.” It was easier to say in the darkness, knowing as I spoke how my voice would betray my vulnerability.

“May I come in?” she asked.

“Would you like to?” I couldn’t picture Edythe sitting in Charlie’s ordinary kitchen chair.

“Yes, if it’s all right.” I heard her get out of the car, and almost simultaneously she was outside my door, opening it for me.

“Slower than I thought,” I teased her.

“Surely by only a few seconds.”

She walked beside me in the night, so quietly I had reach out and take her hand to be sure she was still there. In the darkness she looked different. Still my beautiful Edythe, but no longer the fantastic, if a little ridiculous, sparkling girl of our sunlit afternoon.

We reached the door and she waited. I paused to reach under the eave for the key, and unlocked it. As I replaced the key, she opened the door for me. I stepped inside.

As I reach to flick on the porch light, I noticed her stopped halfway through the frame. I raised my eyebrow.

“Is something wrong?”

“No,” she said, hesitant, “I’ve just never been in a girl’s house before.”

“Ah. No need to be shy,” I said, giggling. “Nothing scary in here.”

I went ahead of her for the moment and gestured down the hall to the kitchen. She stood there for a bit longer, taking in the details of the living room, then followed. In the kitchen, she sat in the very chair I’d tried to picture her in. Her presence lit up the room, and I was suddenly reminded of Renée, in the days before the divorce, how my mother could illuminate the house in the same way. It was a moment before I could look away.

I concentrated on getting my dinner, taking last night’s lasagna from the fridge, placing a square on a plate, heating it in the microwave. It revolved, filling the kitchen with the smell of tomatoes and oregano. I didn’t take my eyes from the plate of food as I spoke.

“Would you like to…?” I asked casually.

“Hmmm?” She sounded as if I had pulled her from some other train of thought.

Suddenly embarrassed, I changed my question. “What do you think of the house?”

Then we both heard the sound of tires on the brick driveway, saw the headlights flash through the front windows, down the hall to us. Edythe was by my side in a moment as I stiffened, my hand darting down to grip hers.

“Does your mother know I’m here?” she asked.

I thought about the silver Volvo in the driveway. “She will now.”

“Should I leave?”

“Do you want to?”

She laughed nervously, but her hold on my hand remained steady. “I’ll stay.”

“Alright,” I said, taking a deep breath.

My ma’s key turned in the door.

“Bella?” she called. It had bothered me before; who else would it be? “Whose car is outside? You going to introduce me to your friend?”

“We’re in here Ch- ma.” I hoped she couldn’t hear the nerves in my voice. I grabbed my dinner from the microwave and sat at the table as she walked in. I heard a chuckle and glared in Edythe’s direction as I burned my hand slightly in my haste to sit down. Charlie’s footsteps suddenly sounded so noisy after my day with Edythe.

I scrambled back up as she walked in, “Hello Bells! Hope you had a good day?” She smiled and winked as she took in the scene (and Edythe) then  stepped on the heels of her boots to take them off, holding the back of my chair for support.

“Yes,” I rolled my eyes at her, “Ma, meet Edythe. Edythe, this is my mother Charlie, though you probably already know her as the sheriff.”

Edythe stood up fluidly, though a mite too fast to be completely calm, and shook Charlie’s hand after the boots were out of the way, “Nice to meet you Sheriff.”

“Oh please, just call me Charlie,” she wasn’t used to this level of polite respect in a pretty rural town where everyone knew her by her first name. “Bella, did you offer our guest some food?”

We started speaking at the same time,

“Edythe isn’t hungry-”

“I already ate, thank you-”

Charlie smiled at us, then with a mischievous grin suggested, “You should show Edythe your room Bella!”

I took my food with me, scarfing it down as I got her dinner. It burned my tongue. I filled two glasses with milk while her lasagna was heating, and gulped mine to put out the fire, busying myself so I wouldn’t have to reply. She didn’t seem to expect one anyway. As I set the glass down, I noticed the milk trembling and realized my hand was shaking. Charlie sat in the chair, her expression bright, lighting up the room almost as much as Edythe had, though her hair and skin were much darker.

“Thanks,” she said as I placed her food on the table.

“How was your day?” I asked. The words were rushed; I was dying to escape to my room.

“Good. The fish were biting… how about you? Did you get everything done that you wanted to?”

“Not really — it was too nice out to stay indoors.” I took another big bite. “Edythe took me hiking.” Why was my face so hot all of a sudden?

Edythe chuckled so softly I thought I might have imagined it.

“Oh really?” Charlie looked between the two of us in amusement. “Nothing too strenuous though?”

Oh my mom, always protective. Edythe hurriedly assured her that it was more like a walk and then a picnic in a clearing in the Preserve.

Finished with the last bite of lasagna, I lifted my glass and chugged the remains of my milk.

Charlie surprised me by being observant. “In a hurry?”

“Not really? I just…” I had made the mistake of looking over at Edythe and my treacherous brain short-circuited and started hyperfocusing on her freckles and the few strands of hair that had fallen in front of her face.

Edythe swooped in and saved me by asking Charlie about the success of her fishing trip. She could go on for quite awhile on the topics of fish and other wildlife.

I quickly scrubbed my dishes clean in the sink, and placed them upside down on a dish towel to dry, trying to take deep breaths and hoping I didn’t look so much like a tomato anymore

“So is Edythe staying the night?” Charlie asked, hip-checking me as she slid up with her plate and fork.

“Mommmm!”

“I’ll just leave you girls to it then! Go show her around Bella, I’ll finish the dishes.”

Another musical chuckle from Edythe, who, to my surprise, seemed to be blushing as well. I took her by the hand before I could chicken out and dragged her out of the kitchen. She may have been shorter than me, but I’m sure if she’d wanted to, she could have stopped me. I tried not to slam the door but my relief at escaping Charlie’s pointed questions was sizeable. She meant well, but sometimes, well, sometimes a girl just needed space!

“Were you really that desperate to get me alone, Bella?” Edythe was incredibly close to me all of a sudden, amber eyes almost glowing in the dark.

I flipped the switch to turn on the strings of lights on my ceiling, scoffing, “I could ask you the same question.” Where was all this confidence coming from? My heart fluttered like a hummingbird, wanting to take flight right out of my chest.

Edythe laughed loudly, flopping down on my bed, bronze hair splaying out around her head like a halo.

“So, give me the grand tour then, Bella Swan.”

I played with the tassel of an old tapestry Charlie had gotten me, from back when Lisa Frank had been an obsession, “Nothing much to show really.”

Edythe sat up suddenly, her face momentarily in shadow.

“You okay?” I peeled myself off the wall.

She stood up, suddenly looking a bit stiff and uncomfortable. “I’ve never been in a girl’s bedroom before.”

I stared at her a few moments before letting loose a giggle. She looked over at me and the spell was broken, her smile curved easily across her face.

“I know that sounds strange when I put it like that.”

“No, I think I know what you mean.” I said, taking her hand more slowly this time, aware of her every movement. I looked down at her and saw she was blushing again. I pulled her to the window, not able to stand the intensity of her gaze for long.

“Here’s my wishing tree.” I pointed out to the gnarled old hawthorn underneath my window. “I would try to make a wish as I’d watch the leaves fall in the autumn, watching one twirl, before it settled on the ground. Or I’d try to guess how many berries were on a branch. If I was right I’d get another wish.” Edythe’s hand was now warm in mine, almost completely normal.

I turned to see her watching me with a fond smile playing across her face. “You never fail to surprise me, Bella Swan.” She gave my hand a squeeze and went over to my bookshelf.

I watched her eyes scan the shelves, then her arm with an upraised finger, poised to pull a book down, but hesitating.

“Warrior Cats? Really?”

I stumbled over in shock. “I…”

“Cinderpelt was innocent,” she said with a grin. Then suddenly she lay, smiling hugely, across my bed, her hands behind her head, her feet dangling off the end, the picture of ease.

“Oh!” I breathed, putting out a hand to brace myself, dizzy from shock.

“I’m sorry!” She sat up, gazing worriedly at me, “too fast?”

"Just give me a minute to restart my heart.”

She carefully reached out a hand and tugged me onto the bed beside her.

“Why don’t you sit down,” she suggested, putting an arm around my shoulders. “How’s the heart?”

“You tell me — I’m sure you hear it better than I do.”

Her shoulders shook with silent laughter.

We sat there for a moment in silence, both listening to my heartbeat slow. I leaned my head onto her shoulder and felt her arm slowly warm to match my temperature. I didn’t want to move.

“Can I have a minute to be human?” I asked as I realized I couldn’t remember if I’d even brushed my teeth this morning.

“Certainly.” She gestured with one hand that I should proceed.

“Stay,” I said, trying to look severe.

“Yes, ma'am.” And she made a show of becoming a statue on the edge of my bed.

I hopped up, grabbing my pajamas from off the floor, my bag of toiletries off the desk. I left the light off and slipped out, closing the door.

I could hear the sound from the TV rising up the stairs. I banged the bathroom door loudly, cursing my dyspraxia. I opened it back up and shouted, “I’m fine,” back down the stairs so Charlie wouldn’t worry. I heard her laugh and say, “Don’t take your frustration out on inanimate objects Bells, you know they can’t fight back.” I definitely heard Edythe laughing then, and stuck my tongue out in her general direction. She didn’t see it but it made me feel better.

I meant to hurry. I brushed my teeth fiercely, trying to be thorough and speedy, removing all traces of lasagna. But the hot water of the shower couldn’t be rushed. It unknotted the muscles in my back, calmed my pulse. The familiar smell of my shampoo made me feel like I might be the same person I had been this morning. I tried not to think of Edythe, sitting in my room, waiting, because then I had to start all over with the calming process. I shut off the water, toweling hastily, rushing again. I pulled on my holey t-shirt and gray sweatpants. Too late to regret not packing the Victoria’s Secret silk pajamas my mother got me two birthdays ago, which still had the tags on them in a drawer somewhere back home.

I quickly put my hair into two cornrows, then tied my silk scarf around my head. I threw the towel in the hamper, flung my brush and toothpaste into my bag. Then I flew into my room, closing the door tightly behind me.

Edythe hadn’t moved a fraction of an inch, a carving of Aphrodite perched on my faded quilt. I smiled, and her lips twitched, the statue coming to life.

Her eyes appraised me, taking in the head scarf, the tattered shirt. She raised one eyebrow. “Nice.”

I grimaced.

“No, it looks good on you.”

“Thanks,” I whispered. I went back to her side, sitting cross-legged beside her. I looked at the lines in the wooden floor.

She lifted my chin, examining my face.

“You look very warm.”

She bent her face slowly to mine, laying her cool cheek against my skin. I held perfectly still.

“Mmmmmm…” she breathed.

It was very difficult, while she was touching me, to think coherently. I felt her hand, lighter than a moth’s wing, brushing a short lock of hair that had escaped the scarf, so that her lips could touch the hollow beneath my ear.

“So I was wondering…” I began again, but her fingers were slowly tracing my collarbone, and I lost my train of thought.

“Yes?” she breathed.

I closed my eyes and sighed, forgetting what it was I might have been wondering at the time.

“Did I do something wrong?”

“No — the opposite. You’re driving me crazy,” I explained.

She considered that briefly, and when she spoke, she sounded pleased.

“Really?” A triumphant smile slowly lit her face.

“Would you like a round of applause?” I asked sarcastically.

She grinned.

“I’m just pleasantly surprised,” she clarified. “In the last hundred years or so,” her voice was teasing, “I never imagined anything like this. I didn’t believe I would ever find someone I wanted to be with… in another way than my sisters. And then to find, even though it’s all new to me, that I’m good at it… at being with you…”

“You’re good at almost everything,” I pointed out.

She shrugged, and we both laughed in whispers.

“But how can it be so easy now?” I pressed. “This afternoon…”

“It feels right,” she sighed. “But this afternoon, I was still… confused and scared. I didn’t understand what I was feeling. I am sorry about that, it was unforgivable for me to behave so.”

“Not completely unforgivable,” I disagreed.

“Thank you.” She smiled. “You see,” she continued, looking down now, “I wasn’t sure if I was enough…” She picked up one of my hands and pressed it lightly to her face. “And while there was still that possibility that … it might be hunger,” — she breathed in the scent at my wrist — “I was… scared. I made up my mind that I was strong enough, but now I don’t have to worry, do I?”

I’d never seen her struggle so hard for words. It was so… human.

“Not about eating me you don’t,” I said.

She threw back her head and laughed, quietly as a whisper, but still exuberantly.

“Not in that way anyway,” she amended, winking, her hands encircling my wrists as she spoke.

I blushed furiously and struggled for words. She laughed her quiet, musical laugh. She’d laughed more tonight than I’d ever heard in all the time I’d spent with her.

“You seem more… playful than usual,” I observed. “I haven’t seen you like this before.”

“Isn’t it supposed to be like this?” She smiled. “The glory of first love, and all that. It’s incredible, isn’t it, the difference between reading about something, seeing it in the pictures, and experiencing it?”

“Very different,” I agreed. “More powerful than I’d imagined.”

I started pulling back, to look in her face, and her hands slowly released my wrists, lingering for a few moments before she let go completely. "What —" I started to ask, when her body became alert. I froze, but then she suddenly leaned back, shifting to put space between us.

“Charlie’s coming," she whispered urgently. I laughed at her startled expression.

I heard the door crack open as Charlie peeked in. 

“You girls need anything?”

“No, ma, we’re fine.” I said, turning to look at her with a combination of pleading and embarrassment.

“Alright, well I’m turning in. Goodnight girls, don’t stay up too late.”

“Goodnight Charlie.” Edythe said solemnly, as I tried not to glare.

Charlie chuckled and closed the door.

Then Edythe's cool arm was around me; almost like she needed comforting.

"What, did you expect her to threaten you with a rifle?" I muttered, trying not to laugh, my heart still crashing in my chest.

She shook her head and chuckled. “I’m used to having to hide, not getting close to anyone outside my family. Instincts took over I guess. I only seemed to notice later that her thoughts were amused and not aggressive.”

“I think Charlie teases me about girls because she doesn’t want me to feel alone, but when she saw how I am around you- I guess she picked up on the fact that this isn’t just a crush. She might’ve been the one to try to give you the shovel talk a year ago, but we’ve talked a few times. She trusts me to come to her if I need anything. ”

She hummed a melody I didn’t recognize; it sounded like a lullaby.

She paused. “Should I sing you to sleep?”

“Right,” I laughed. “Like I could sleep with you here!”

“So if you don’t want to sleep…” she suggested, ignoring my tone. My breath caught.

“If I don’t want to sleep… ?”

She chuckled. “What do you want to do then?”

I couldn’t answer at first.

“I’m not sure,” I finally said.

“Tell me when you decide.”

I could feel her cool breath on my neck, feel her nose sliding along my jaw.

“You have a very floral smell, like lavender… or freesia,” she noted.

“I’ve decided what I want to do,” I told her, fighting to keep my thoughts from scattering to the four winds. “I want to hear more about you.”

“Ask me anything.”

“Why can you read minds — why only you? And Alice, seeing the future… why does that happen?”

I felt her shrug in the darkness. “We don’t really know. Carine has a theory… she believes that we all bring something of our strongest human traits with us into the next life, where they are intensified — like our minds, and our senses. She thinks that I must have already been very sensitive to the thoughts of those around me. And that Alice had some precognition, wherever she was.”

“What did she bring into the next life, and the others?”

“Carine brought her compassion. Esme brought her ability to love passionately. Eleanor brought her strength, Rosalie her… tenacity. Or you could call it pigheadedness.” she chuckled. “Jasper is very interesting. She was quite charismatic in her first life, able to influence those around her to see things her way. Now she is able to influence the emotions of those around her — calm down a room of tense people, for example, or excite a lethargic crowd, conversely. It’s a very subtle gift.”

I considered the impossibilities she described, trying to take it in. She waited patiently while I thought.

“So where did it all start? I mean, Carine changed you, and then someone must have changed her, and so on…”

“Well, where did you come from? Evolution? Creation? Couldn’t we have evolved in the same way as other species, predator and prey? Or, if you don’t believe that all this world could have just happened on its own, which is hard for me to accept myself, is it so hard to believe that the same force that created the delicate angelfish with the shark, the baby seal and the killer whale, could create both our kinds together?” She laughed, and something touched my hair — her lips? I wanted to turn toward her, to see if it was really her lips against my hair.

“Are you ready to sleep?” she asked, interrupting the short silence. “Or do you have any more questions?”

“Only a million or two.”

“We have tomorrow, and the next day, and the next…” she reminded me. I smiled, euphoric at the thought.

“Are you sure you won’t vanish in the morning?” I wanted this to be certain. “You are mythical, after all.”

“I won’t leave you.”

“One more, then, tonight…” And I blushed. The darkness was no help — I’m sure she could feel the sudden warmth under my skin.

“What is it?”

“No, forget it. I changed my mind.”

“Bella, you can ask me anything.”

I didn’t answer, and she groaned.

“I keep thinking it will get less frustrating, not hearing your thoughts. But it just gets worse and worse.”

“Now you know how the rest of us feel.”

“Please?” Her voice was so persuasive, so impossible to resist.

“Well,” I began, glad that she couldn’t see my face.

“Yes?”

“You said that Rosalie and Eleanor will get married soon… Is that… marriage… how many times have they gotten married? Why do you do it?”

She laughed in earnest now, understanding. “Is that what you’re getting at?”

I fidgeted, unable to answer.

“Well, I suppose it’s because we’re all in high school again. We’ve been enrolled in quite a few colleges, but it’s too easy to stay longer like that, and I guess Carine thought this would be safer. Rosalie especially enjoys the celebrations, and Alice organizing everything and picking out clothes. It’s almost like a holiday tradition.”

“You…” I began. She waited. “Well, doesn’t it get tedious to take the same classes over and over, to go back to that level of emotional maturity? Or lack thereof,” I added.

She laughed and lightly rumpled my nearly dry hair.

"I’m still seventeen years old emotionally. I may have more knowledge, though I don’t remember everything from the classes I’ve taken,” she paused, playing with a lock of my hair, “I guess it’s different for each of us. It’s not something we’ve discussed a lot, and now I’m curious what the others might say,” she mused.

I yawned involuntarily.

“I’ve answered your questions, now you should sleep,” she insisted.

“I’m not sure if I can.”

She laughed, and then began to hum that same, unfamiliar lullaby; the voice of an angel, soft in my ear.

More tired than I realized, exhausted from the long day of mental and emotional stress like I’d never felt before, I drifted to sleep in her now warm embrace.

[twifeordeath]

editing chapter 15!!

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