#tw: drama //

[sweet-chimera]

TW: Call out post, drama

// Damn we were going to keep it quiet and respectful until this point. because like always. Spork, aka Shiloh can't take accountability and Never does anything wrong despite the fact that this is the what? 6th group of people enmass to cut contact with them? Spork we were being quiet about it for YOUR sake. Cause you're a bad person and we wanted to be done with you. But fine. We'll do it your way. We blocked you because you're a toxic person who threatens to harm yourself when we don't comply to you. Not because of a fake wedding rp event. Content and stories under the cut. Long post trigger warning

And because he named dropped us, potentially to potentially insight violence on us. We'll return the favor. We were willing to just soft block and call it a day but then you do this? We knew you were a karen but come on spork. This is low even for you. For those of you that don't know, Spork aka:

patchiesdoodles, decipheringmadness, cxpescxwlsandcrxmes, ifyouwouldloveme, thegreeksknewthescore, fxllen-cne, thxpatriarch, unforgivendivine, AND the-blackened-dove.

Likes to block evade, exhibit controlling tendencies towards their rp partners, leverage marginalization's to groups that he doesn't belong to to white knight and get his way, tone police, sexually harass people mainly on voice call, guilt trip, bully those that speak out against him, use his partners to harass people who block him, vague posts, gives ultimatums, and threaten self harm when he doesn't get his way.

Lets get this out of the way, My experience with spork

I met spork in the muntain june 2023. And it was one of the most grating experience of my life. At every chance they got they spoke over people, talked openly about their sexual trauma when no one has consented to hearing it. And tone policed me, a cambodian/afro indigenous person from baltimore, for using language that was "Offensive to black people." Only to then lay off after yelling at me for a few minutes. When he found out I was black. (Screen shot of me talking to the mod of the muntain afterwards)

I was off put, and upset. That someone who is this complexion

is tone policing me, AN AFRO INDIGENOUS PERSON WHEN I MAKE NO ATTEMPTS TO HIDE IT. IM BLACK.

But seeing as we're a vastly neuro divergent community. I forgave and forgot because it wasn't worth the fight. it didn't stop them from constantly bringing up sexual or traumatic topics. But at the very least. They were upset at me for using AAVE and saying the N word. A SLUR I CAN USE.

But then later down the line. I talked to the muntain mod about introducing my partners to the rp community and to help the transition go smoothly.

I EVEN WENT INTO VOICE CALL AND BEGGED THEM, SPORK SPECIFICALLY. TO BE ON THEIR BEST BEHAVIOUR.

My girlfriend joined on the 30th and my boyfriend joined on the first.

During the first call on the 30th. Spork dominated the conversation and flirted with my girlfriend infront of me upon finding out we were polyamourus. But for the most part was respectful.

On the voice call on the second. They were racist and immflamatory to my boyfriend. Tao. A native mexican man. Spork claims to be indigenous themself but I have no proof of this. But as we all know, Abrahamic religions have decimated the indigenous populations and caused Alot of harm.

On voice call. Spork brings up their LITERAL JESUS CHRIST muse. And talks about their religious trauma. Tao, also talks about his in the form of a joke. "Oh Jesus sure liked to wash feet huh?" A TRUE FACT. NOT THAT BAD. WE ALL HAVE MADE FUN OF IT.

Here comes white knight Spork, yelling at my partner to not make fun of jewish traditions. Its insensitive and blastephemous. Only to then dominate the conversation to talk about their trans jesus muse who openly talks about being abused by god

(Recap of the voice call i had with the mod)

So spork, a white passing person AT BEST, told my darker complexion NATIVE MEXICAN BOYFRIEND. That he shouldn't make jokes about judaism? When spork is a white satanist? And all abrahamic religions not just Catholicism has caused damage to our populations? You didn't even let him say more then that one joke, you didn't even give him 10 seconds to say is name before dominating the conversation again

Sweetie. 1.) Anyone can criticize and make fun of the bible, the torah, or the Quran. 2.) SAYING JESUS WASHED FEET. WHICH IS TRUE. IS NOT AS INFLAMMATORY. As making a gay trans jesus blog AS A ROLEPLAY CHARACTER. To talk about how god abused him.

And these are just my personal experiences with spork.

WANNA KNOW WHAT HAPPENED WHEN THEIR FRIEND POLITELY ASKED TO STOP SHIPPING BUT STILL BE FRIENDS?

HMMM. THATS WEIRD. THATS A PRETTY POLITE WAY TO GO ABOUT HAVING A CONVERSATION. BECAUSE CONSENT TAKES TWO PARTIES. WHAT WAS YOUR RESPONSE TO ONE PARTY NOT CONSENTING SO YOU DONT GET YOUR WAY?

OH YEAH.

YOU VAGUE POST ON THE DASH, GUILT TRIP PEOPLE FOR STILL ASSOCIATED WITH VOID (gin-n-chthonic) and get upset when you saw them on your dash because you keep block evading them to see if they were talking about you. YOURE MENTAL HEALTH WAS MESSED UP BECAUSE YOUR FRIEND HAD A POLITE CONVERSATION WITH YOU? ABOUT NOT REAL CHARACTERS? AND YOUR RESPONSE WAS A PUBLIC CALL OUT POST. And then you go around to people like slurk.

Who've you've been codependently abusing for a long time. And try to guilt trip them into blocking void.

Because thats a sound response. AS WELL AS BITCH AND MOAN ABOUT IT IN CALL FOR DAYS. THIS ISN'T EVEN INCLUDING THE FACT THAT YOU HAVE A HABIT OF GETTING YOUR FRIENDS AND PARTNERS TO ATTACK AND OSTRICIZE PEOPLE FOR YOU. Remember when jessica was sick with covid. But you wanted an answer so bad. That you sent your boyfriend after her? CAUSE WE DO.

And how you admitted in voice call that you would type from Boogies account to send people things, speak for him. OR ADMITTED THAT ROLEPLAYING IS A SPIRITUAL THING FOR YOU. How these characters are extension of yourself and if they feel pain or rejected you do? So every time someones muse doesn't want to interact with them. YOU A REAL HUMAN BEING FEEL THE PAIN?

cause we do.

SO LETS RECAP. TLDR;

you give ultimatums

guilt trip

block evade

were openly racist to a mexican indigenous man

hit on my girlfriend infront of me

can't read a room socially

send mobs after people

talk about traumatic shit without peoples consent

overly sexual even when we say we're uncomfortable

fly off the handle and go on public tirades when we try to talk to you, then get surprised when no one wants to talk to you and just quietly exits your life

use your loved ones accounts to talk to people who go nc with you

only white knight and virtue signal when its convenient to you

want to control everyones character and insert your muse into everything but when they don't comply you guilt trip, bitch, give ultimatums, or post publicly about not being loved

you weaponize your marginalization as a trans man but are clearly white passing and command alot of social power from your social media presence

sexually harass people around you

and you tone police the people of color around you when we speak up

WE DIDN'T BLOCK YOU OVER A FAKE RP EVENT. WITH FAKE PEOPLE THAT YOU INSIST ARE REAL. WE REFUSE TO BE AROUND YOU BECAUSE YOU REFUSE TO GET HELP FOR YOUR MENTAL HEALTH. WE BEGGED YOU TO. AND YOU GUILT TRIP PEOPLE WITH THREATS OF OSTRICHCIZATION AND SELF HARM.

YOU'RE A BAD PERSON SPORK.

[poisonedspider]

Hot take: Just because you can't respond right away does not make you a bad roleplayer. This is something I have to keep telling myself, too. But I've been talking to a few friends lately that are feeling inadequate in some ways because people will suddenly stop writing with them because they aren't responding immediately that day, and that breaks my heart. We're all adults (or we should be in this fandom, big ooooof), and we all have lives. Sometimes we can't just sit on the computer and type back and forth for hours. I'd personally never get anything done if that was the case for me.

Just know that I'm always going to be patient with y'all. I don't care if it takes a day, or three months. You never have to apologize. I will be right here, excited whenever I get a reply, and excited to write with you. I just want people to know that they are still loved and appreciated even if they aren't around as much, because this is a HOBBY, and I've seen too many sad posts about people feeling unwanted because they aren't around consistently.

[killerlittlerejects]

“Summer is only 18, they weren’t trying to be malicious!”

How about you stop guilt tripping people because they were angry about what happened? Even if Summer never meant to do anything malicious, they still chose to draw and post that art, WELL AWARE of the symbol they were drawing and admitted themselves that they are impulsive.

Listen, I get it. I did impulsive shit when I was a teenager too and I’m not proud of it. But this is a whole other level, considering the context/material.

Hell, I’ve been made aware that the everymanhybrid team and fandom agreed on rewriting the lore so Habit wouldn’t be… THAT. So I’m confused on why they would want to continue to portray him as… THAT.

This isn’t a call to cancel Summer or harass them. In fact, this can be considered a message to them. So, Summer, if you do ever manage to come across this post: you need to take accountability and apologize properly. No excuses, no bullishit. Acknowledge that you hurt people and take the art down. Prove to the fandom that you actually regret your actions.

[cardnompfs]

I'm just gonna make this post just to condemn something, Read tags before you click read more.

Content Warning: Drama, Threat of Violence/Murder

Whoever is that anonymous user who just sent me an message encouraging me to kill someone, Fuck off. I don't want to be part of the drama of whatever you think you're having, But telling me to kill a minor? What a fucking psychopath you are. Not to mention you been harassing them nonstop for the past week, How could you think you are more justified to hide behind anonymous status just to sent this?

Everyone please report and block the anonymous if you ever receive such ask. Because no matter what side of the coin of the situation it is, No one should be encouraging or even telling someone should be dead, Regardless of circumstances.

End of story.

[red-man-of-mustache]

Namedropping

Hey everyone! We're gonna take a little detour today/tonight to talk about something that's happened between me and someone you might know at @askwendyokoopa. I labored with this because in all my time being on/off tumblr I've never had to make such a post as this. Usually, if I block someone or someone blocks me we both move on like normal people. In this case though, I was appraised of the habits of this person along with my own experience with them and I proceeded with a block only to be met with them hopping on another account to blatantly get around said block then, when I refused to engage further they name-dropped me. Here's the post in question I'll be addressing throughout.

But, let's begin shall we? I'll start by talking about me. This'll be a long read and I know I'm asking a lot but please read it in full if you interact with his person.

I hope I've tagged this appropriately, if I haven't let me know. I'll also be reblogging this for the day crowd.

My blog is a safe place. I rp Mario as very campy, bright, and happy-go-lucky so I extend that to my general post pattern. I take my name and reputation quite seriously and as stated just a second ago I wrestled with making this post but I cannot let what they've said go uncontested. If you're reading this and you interact with them then this isn't me damning you or claiming I won't interact with you because of it but this is simply a cautionary tale. With that being said, for the more sensitive bits of proof, shoot me a DM or hit me up on discord(available upon request) and I can furnish you with even deeper details than I plan on going into in this post.

I have always avoided airing out my dirty laundry so to speak when it comes to any aspect of my life on this blog. Although it is "my" blog and I can post whatever I want, again, this is a place of uplifting and an escape. Rare is it when I'll post about how I struggle with certain things or if I feel dejected from a certain community and so on. I made a post a few months ago talking about my substance abuse and how I overcame it. In that same post I spoke about my mom, her alcoholism, and how she injured me in an altercation we had. I did that to be open because these same struggles have impacted my time on here. I was heavily self-medicating during my last run on tumblr and although I was present it was because I literally wished I didn't exist at the time. It all culminated into last year, spilling into this year. You can read that post for that information. I won't entirely retread that ground here.

It's a heavy subject and it's a dark contrast to what I usually post but I did so in case anyone could take strength from knowing I made it through a major struggle such as that.

Now this is a post about @askwendyokoopa,whom we'll refer to as Wendy for the rest of this post, why am I talking about me first? Well, once again, I've never blocked someone and seen them 1. try to circumvent the block with another account(one that perpetrates what I've come to have an issue with on them, more on that later) and 2. have that same person namedrop me for that block as if I need to convince them I don't wish to speak with them anymore.

Yes, I did.

Truly this song & dance is new to me. Again, I take my name(url) very seriously so to call me out as if I've done something wrong to you for not wanting to speak to you?? That's my right, you can't play victim just because I didn't give you a college thesis. This is the internet, if I don't wanna communicate with you I just won't.

I don't make vague posts about people I don't like, nor do I vaguely allude to me going through a tough time(at least I try not to, if I have those incidents are few and far between) I'll outright say I'm not feeling it or something along those lines but even then I have to be going through hell to make such a post. I also refuse to put it on my moots and followers when I feel inadequate because I'm here to lift you up not the other way around. If you choose to drop a compliment on my writing or personality, great! I deeply appreciate it and it motivates me to keep going but I'm here to give a boost to everyone around me through Mario. He's been with me since I was a kid and always a figure of inspiration in how he faces down trouble. I could use a bit of that in my adult life. I just wanna share that with everyone else.

I've actually been sort of a monolith my whole time on Tumblr and you know what? It's gotten me into a lot of trouble I can't lie. I'm doing my best to break that pattern by being upfront with how I feel, speaking to people more even if it's just to say "Hey I like your blog" or something simple along those lines. How can I claim to wanna provide a morale boost to people if I'm as reclusive as I (still) am? Doesn't make sense which is why I've been moving to change it.

This is not to name me a victim by the way. All this person did was namedrop me and mildly annoy me/make me uncomfortable but I've spoken with actual victims of their harassment and that was actually the last straw. So if anything I'm getting off light, I'm only doing this to clear my side of things and provide clarity for why this is happening.

I met Wendy way back in the infancy of my old @red-man-of-archive blog which I'm sure is obvious that it was the same URL you see me using now when it was active. Things were casual but consistent. IC Wendy had a crush on Mario but he usually never reciprocated and just moved on. Was it harassment back then? No. We didn't talk OOC and kept things "business" as I'll call it. They were amicable and their portrayal was pretty accurate in my opinion of course. Nothing funny going on to my knowledge.

Fast forward to me going through the various issues I did, being unable to even keep up with basic blog activity, and then going on extended hiatus. I tried coming back but had lost my phone number by then due to financial reasons and I decided this was the chance I needed to start over. So I did! I remade the blog September of 2018, archived the old one since I was still somehow logged in on my phone at the time and moved on. I don't think Wendy was around when I started over but they did come around. And to clarify: it still wasn't harassment. Things were casual, when threads ended they didn't have a foul word to say.

I end up dropping out again from tumblr, still in the storm that is my life. Not even a full month later either. I'd pop in for spurts of activity but it never lasted. Didn't see hide or hair of Wendy during this period.

Then we arrive at this year. Nearly three years after my last posting. I had quit smoking(THC) completely, I'm on the uptick in my job/finances, and I'm seeing a therapist. Took a look back and I've been reclusive, posting from my little cave this whole time and I came to the realization that if I want any staying power I need to put more of me out there alongside Mario. So, I start approaching people OOC more and trying to be forthcoming in where our threads are going or if I'm liking/disliking something.

Coming back to Wendy. When I got back so-to-speak I went through my followers to see if anyone was still active. Three years is a long time after all. I came across her again: Wendy. I looked at the timestamps, saw how far back they'd posted but they were among the people I felt comfortable enough to message despite the inactivity. Ironic.

Now, I can't show chat messages between us because when I blocked them the messages were nuked. I don't feel like attempting an unblocking to revive it but I'm about 90% sure they can see my posts anyway. Bear with me a little longer on this narration.

They get back to me after a bit and we start chopping it up. We catch up and I'll be 100% transparent in saying yes I did go along with everything being suggested. We started an entire thread based off innuendo but it was quite ham-fisted and when I stopped replying they began to pester me "Did I do something wrong? Can you not find another acronym?" even going so far as to start interacting with me through a different post and asking in character why I didn't reply.

That thread and the in character incident are gone unfortunately as I deleted them. But, I've got more than that to share. Innuendo isn't inherently bad nor does it go outside of what I do here as Mario.

By this point my patience has been tested and I realize this isn't the same amicable person I used to deal with. I can't speak for others OOC but I will say they hijack posts very often to ramble in character with this self-referential tone that makes it quite obvious this isn't Wendy(the character) speaking but the mun or simply turn things inappropriate. A few examples, we got

Just bizarre, plus it's AI

Again, weird, but not a blockable offense. They've at least put the bare minimum of effort in to tag it, I guess right? Well, around the time the gears were turning regarding this person's odd and pushy behavior there was someone within a server I've joined who made an announcement about them given they've had experience with this person. Unfortunate experience it seems.

They detailed a lot of things as did a few other moots of mine but one thing in particular stuck out to me. They claimed that this particular person used a whole host of other blogs to stalk/harass them. Then I remember this post.

Wait a second... going to their profile proper we see

Then if we hover over Pom Pom we see

So, not only do they have a laundry list of accounts at their disposal but they use them to circumvent blocks, and then will talk to themselves using these same accounts.

I don't wanna associate with someone like this. And this is just the tip of the iceberg, if I haven't convinced you yet, contact me through tumblr DM's or discord and I can let you know what else I know because their rap sheet is longer than their muse list.

They mass follow people within communities they're active in and even if you block this main blog, they could be on your follower list and you don't even know it. Thusly, I am going to suggest you block this person and their list of alternative blogs, and move on. If I still haven't convinced you, once again hit me up privately because I've got more personal stuff to share that doesn't belong here per se.

I don't wanna see this person victimize other people and that's why I took the time to put out this warning. All that talk earlier from me about "uplifting people" but I'm making a callout post right? Well, once again, I didn't want to originally because I thought I could just move on. But, this is a chronic pattern of behavior exhibited by this person and I don't wanna see them victimize someone else. If me blocking them didn't get them up in arms enough to namedrop me and play the victim themselves we wouldn't be here. Plus, I wasn't the only person addressed in their little callout post.

So, that's the scoop on why I blocked askwendyokoopa and why I believe you should too. They are not worth your time or energy.

The rabbit hole goes deeper but I've rambled long enough.

My discord is available upon request if you'd like to discuss things further. This will be my first and last time addressing them/this situation publicly. I don't do drama and in a month it'll be ten years since I started posting on tumblr. This has never happened to me before and I'd like to keep it that way.

Thank you.

[praeteritus-memories]

(Why is the Hazbin fandom a bunch of, and pardon my French here, a bunch of gosh damn lunatics.

People are accusing one of my best friends of shit they didn't do, for literally no fucking reason. Not to mention the anon hate they've received in the past over a fucking fictional ship because that's totally what a mature adult does.

Then there's the 10/10 maturity of blocking and making other people tag duplicates. I get it, the anxiety of dups, but my gosh we're grown adults and this is a ROLEPLAY community. We're not really these characters and no one "owns" these characters, legally Vivzie does but that's beside the point.

Point is, seeing shit like THIS is partly why I banned Hazbin/Helluva for so many years on this blog and STILL hold my reservations about other blogs unless it's friends I already know.

Y'all need some gosh damn therapy dudes, fucking hell.)

[abyssalreid]

I have an announcement to make. I officially have two personas now. This "new" one is not actually new... But a character that a handful of you already know. At least those who have been a fan of me for years...

No matter how hard I try to replace or remove him. Or even TRY TO SAY GOODBYE. HE ALWAYS COMES BACK WITH A VENGEANCE.

It is because from the very beginning when I made him. I put everything I wanted to be, wish I could be [without gaining the health issues], and then some into this very character... BRINEARY.

Sadly, I had deleted a lot of my older art of him due to my troubled past involving someone. Who I foolishly thought they had ruined the one character I held dear.

tho the last art i did of him is on @brinearymc the original Brineary blog I had was shadow-banned and full of... content related to someone I wish not to mention.

his new version will be put here @brineary [ I somehow still managed to keep his blog URL. ]

But yes, It's the chaos god I made in Minecraft so many years ago. The one character who I said I'd never let him fall in love with... The one who if I extended his love through him meant so much more than you could ever realize.

The one who was used and taken advantage of because I was stupid enough to trust anyone with him, let alone even let him be SHIPPED with anyone. [that's not happening again, ever]

I am updating his design and he will be symbolized as my Male counterpart as my persona.

As for his Minecraft version? his story is done. He was slayn while protecting his son and friend, Now, @Somabrin continues in his place. And that's how it ends in the MC verse.

[ blog is locked away due to me leaving MC fandom. I only play the game and stream it now ]

Anyway, here's a sketch of his updated design so far. some things may stay the same as his more Human-like design. But a lot of info and lore about him will be changing, for example? He's now the unspoken son of the Elderitch god, Nyarlathotep, the crawling chaos. Brineary is the prince of chaos.

W.I.P. still~

Felt like Y'all should get another update.

[historias-multorum]

Also, since I've seen it here's my 2 cents:

It is NOT your business to tell people who they should or should be dating in rp terms.

And you should NEVER be using slurs either like R*tard EVER. That's just no, if you're using slurs like that you are gross and you need to reevaluate your life choices.

This is role playing NOT fanfiction.net or Ao3. Mind your business, no one cares for your 2 cents it's not about you. Keep your comments to yourself especially if you got nothing good to say.

[the-delightful-temptation]

//I wasn't going to comment on the topic, but since it's happening to my moots besides myself, I'm saying something.

This place is an area to write fake scenarios. Nothing here is real and people can mold it as they seem fit for a plot they like. It’s all fun and games, and the good thing is, there are a lot of us around. 

I got some asks about Ozzie and Charlie because I’m making her ship with a man, but hey there are other ships, other people making different stuff, if you don’t like it you can blacklist a tag not to show up or even stop following the rplayer. Harassing them isn’t going to help anyone.

Remember we’re all here to hang out and have fun. 

[visage-of-hell]

This is going to be the ONE and ONLY time this topic is eeeeever being broached on this blog, as I despise bringing any kind of "drama" into a space that's supposed to be for fun and for us to escape from shitty things. But just this once, I feel like it's really important. The rest is under a read more for those who wanna avoid this sorta crap (and I honestly don't blame you). See you on a happier funner post! <3

It's recently been brought to my attention that someone I used to associate with in this community has sought out my personal Twitter and has gone looking for my history of tweets to showcase the very worst of me to those I consider dear friends. At this time, I honestly have no idea what this person's motivations for doing this are, but it is what it is. In the end, it has cost me one of the closest and dearest friendships I have had in this community and I don't want this former mutual having the power to continue doing this to others I care about. If the grisly truth about my former actions is going to come to light, it's going to come from ME and not from someone else. Lemme start by being completely honest--Twitter has ALWAYS brought out the worst in me (as I'm sure is true for a lot of people), for as long as I've ever used it. Bigots, emotional manipulators and abusers have a way of bringing out a very ugly side of myself. No matter how much I tell myself I can comment without stooping too low ... I always inevitably do. I turn into a version of myself that I don't even recognize when I come across antagonistic people who are among those that are a trigger for this kind of aggression. In the spirit of complete transparency, I'm sharing with you here the link to all the replies I've ever made on Twitter. The good, the bad, the ugly. If you can still harbor any sort of respect for me after knowing that this version of me has existed from as recently as 5 months ago, you have my genuine appreciation. But I feel as though you have a right to see it from the source, and not second-hand: https://x.com/YeenQueenGaming/with_replies I've since tried to distance myself from Twitter as much as possible because I don't want to be that kind of person anymore, festering in so much hate and anger, even if it might be towards those that arguably may deserve it sometimes (as long as it doesn't go as far as I've had a tendency to take it). But people ABSOLUTELY have a right to cultivate their space and peace of mind in whatever way they need to, and I hold no animosity to you at all if any of what you see there is enough to make you want to cut ties with me, as well. You deserve to interact with people that make you feel safe. I'm keeping those directly involved nameless, because I choose to be respectful and not vengeful. That ISN'T who I want to be anymore. I'm saddened that this other individual who sought out my Twitter couldn't do the same, but that's on them. More than anything else, I'm just sorry that it caused a very dear friend of mine hurt that they didn't deserve. I'm not telling you guys all this to change the minds of anyone who chooses to step away from me, as that isn't my place and would be disrespectful towards your needs. All I want is for you all to have the context that I'm certain the person who would show you these things wasn't going to give you, so you can make your own fully-informed choices. If you do choose to go, I'll miss you, but I mean it when I say I wish only the best for you. I hope the rest of your time in this RP community is filled with nothing but good times, even if it's no longer with me. <3

[neverland-king]

smol statement

I'm glad I remember about this soft blocking. I don't tolerate drama, and someone pushing to reblog or make a statement that's dramatic and saying 'pls give me attention' is a no no. good luck to ye. i just won't be apart of it.

[sweet-chimera]

// Yes, the person who i've had blocked for 5 years, has double digit call out posts about them, is friends with the proven abuser and liar-- said that me. The person who hasn't so much as posted about spork since februrary. Said that i'm going out of my way to harass someone. // Listen gang. I'm gonna address this once and only once. I've never sent anon hate, i've never stalked anyone, i've never not taken no for an answer. I work for government entities who would not hire me, if i have ever. And can find out quickly if I had. I do not care about them. I am an adult with a job, a home, and a life. Spork and curio are not worth losing sleep over much less my job. If they want to point fingers at me, because they both collectively pissed off about 100 people. They're free to. // I'm not the one doing it. This is infact. The last ask i will ever answer about either of them. I hate drama and hate that I had to do this cause two thirty year olds can't get their shit together and like starting internet drama. We literally, were the ones who wanted to simply, block spork and walk away and only posted the call out because spork likes doxing. And he got mad at us for all blocking, so told their following our blogs.

Have the day you deserve to have.

And fyi-- i've had fantasy concrete blocked since 2018. I cant see what ever bs they're posting. But i'm going to assume its a woe is me post people we have no proof of harassing us are 100% totally sending us hate some how.

[poisonedspider]

TW: drama? I guess? It's fine, and I'm fine, but someone asked me last night so I figured I'd bring it up in a little Read More. If anyone is interested. Just wanted to put it out there I guess?? Shrug.

Yes, I do panic when people suddenly block me or unfollow me. No, I'm not going to stalk them (I used to, I won't lie. I won't say stalk, but I'm such an 'everyone get along PLEASE' type that I would log on to other accounts and try to have a conversation and ask if we could resolve things). I've grown from that and learned that people can do whatever they want, curate their own space, etc. Not everyone is going to like me (which, pfft, y'all missing out /jkjk).

But yeah, I do get anxious. I do spiral. I'm working on it, but it IS a legit trigger to me. It isn't something small and silly. Two years ago, I was cancelled in another RPC (if any of you know me, because some of you know me from over there, you know exactly what I'm talking about). I won't go into all of that here, but I am always open to talking about it! It isn't a secret at all to me, so reach out. The very long TLDR is I was falsely accused of something by someone that had cancelled people in many different fandoms. Beginning of last year, them and I had a long talk, they apologized profusely, things are fine now.

But everything that happened there still hits me. I go to therapy for this shit, no joke. I went from having 1000 some followers to 130ish give or take literally over night. I woke up to death threats. I had people trying to figure out my legal name so they could dox me, and try to get my licensure removed. It was a mess. I'll say about 95% of the people apologized over time. Said they shouldn't have followed the crowd because I've been nothing but kind to them. Basically, it's okay.

But it wasn't. I know this is just roleplay, but for a lot of us, this community means a lot. If I follow you, you're my friend. I might not talk to you ooc much if at all, but I watch your posts and I care about you all and I honestly spend most of my free time here talking to y'all then I do my irl friends. So imagine your entire community suddenly screaming about you with no evidence. Believing a rumor. (The sane ones were like...there is literally no evidence I don't understand cult mentality on this site). I was hospitalized. That was the last time I got to see my grandma before she was hit hard with dementia and she forgot who I was, and I spent it trying to do damage control on my phone. It was brutal.

I will say, and I've said it a hundred times, this is the safest fandom I've ever been in. I'm not scared here. It's the happiest I've ever been, and I find it hysterical that the Hellaverse are the most sane people I've met. But that hairpin trigger is still there, even if it's been pushing two years now. I lose a follower, and I immediately spiral. I think like, great, what am I being accused of now? What rumor am I going to wake up to? Am I going to wake up and have no friends again? Am I going to lose Angel and this blog that bring me such joy?

Again, I'm working on it. The more that I see that this isn't the case, the better I feel. I'm like phew okay I can lose a follower or two, I'm not having a mass unfollow, the world will not end. It was probably just differences, or not thinking our writing styles mesh. It is OKAY. But there's still that initial anxiety. That holy shit. That...legitimate....PTSD response.

I'm not posting this to like guilt anyone if they want to unfollow me, or a woe as me or anything. I guess it just made me think like, we don't know everyone's story. I'm not going to attack anyone for unfollowing me, oh jfc no that isn't me, but if I'm anxious? Scared? Like, it isn't just 'wow, you're being pathetic, people are allowed to write with who they want to.' It's genuine trauma. Trauma I'm going to therapy for. Trauma I was hospitalized for. And it could be that way for several people, which is why I am personally never one to block or unfollow unless I feel legitimately threatened.

Wow, that was way more of a rant than I wanted. I'm sorry about that all, oof. I don't even know why I really ranted, other than that I feel safe with you guys to do so. I just know some people get really upsetti when people are hurt by roleplay things, and while that's valid, being hurt is also valid. Again, I'm doing better. And a lot of that is BECAUSE you guys are such a great community. A community who I love and adore.

So yeah, if I get anxious or depressed, don't mind me. Or be like, "Hey, you're safe here." But it isn't your responsibility to do that. It's MINE to do that. Just know that I'm working on it, I'm going to mess up sometimes because PTSD is a bitttttch, but yeah. End rant, lol. Off to do replies now. :) PS. This is also why I'm hiding in the drafts more than on my dash board. So I don't trigger this PTSD response. That's my way of keeping myself safe. I can't see stuff if I'm just hiding in things that belong to me, and also, it helps me to feel comforted knowing I have such wonderful writers and friends that want to write with me and love my version of Angel. So that's one way I'm supporting myself and stabilizing my mental health, so hey, I'm proud that I'm doing it because I don't want this stuff impacting any of you guys. <3

[gunsnboots]

B l o c k e d

[cardnompfs]

I'm just gonna take a break, I can't handle all this stress, drama and all...

Call me paranoid, Or whatever it could be.. There's gonna be a fallout. I just don't wanna be associated or brought into it when it has nothing to do with me. All i want is comfort and tranquility

[auburniivenus]

ooc; block me if you must; I don't give a damn. I was always true to myself, and that's why I'm making this post. I got blocked out of the blue by someone whom I thought I was really close to, someone I was about to call a friend! No message telling me why, nothing. I only discovered it because I went to check drafts and talked with this other person whom I thought was also a common friend. So, shit happened in my absence, and I, who had nothing to do with it, got dragged into it. I didn't think I deserved this kind of behavior, but well, it seems I did. Well, good. I prefer to have fewer friends but good ones here. It's just sad that people use us as a toy and leave us as if we were not a person with feelings. Like we were nothing. This shows a lot of a person.