#trying to convince myself that’s true lmaooo
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omega disciple shen yuan au pt 2 electric boogaloo
cw for the sex pest again but…mans will not be returning lmao (nor will that theme, probably)
shen yuan is nine years old when the brothel madam—nainai, she insists—starts having him run errands. picking up tea from the mings’ shop down the road, dropping off letters and packages for people around town. he’s gotten stronger, healthier. the farmers who sold him must not have fed him much. he’s gone from stick thin to youthfully soft; the dark smudges beneath his eyes have lightened. the village sits in a mountain, on a plateau that jiejie says was formed when a huge demon blew the peak off the mountain a thousand years ago. shen yuan doesn’t believe her, but he stays wary all the same. he knows what mountain range they're in, after all. he knows just as well as everyone else about the immortal masters up on the peaks. he isn't thinking about it. he's not a cultivator.
he is still young, his heats still dry and soft. they don’t make him work when it comes; all the brothel aunties bring him silks and blankets and help him nest, and nainai makes sure there’s always at least one auntie there to look after him. distantly, shen yuan knows that heats are supposed to be a hassle for grown omegas. he's staunchly not thinking about it—instead he sits cuddled up with jiejie or gege or one of the aunties and reads them stories. heats really aren't so bad.
nainai and all of the aunties always said if he starts to feel heat sick while he’s out running errands, he has to come back immediately. it's a little overbearing, honestly. he isn't stupid; he knows how to take care of himself. he hasn't frozen up since that time with that alpha, and he knows to run away if something happens again.
he's been a little warm the past few days, and his nose has been really sensitive—irritating, really! he curses the shitty author in his heart every time a guest with a rancid scent strolls into the brothel. but two little symptoms don't mean it's pre-heat. gege got him a journal to track his heats with, and it's not supposed to come for two more weeks. he's fine.
so he hides his fever and stifles his gags when nainai asks him to to go drop off a package at the tea shop and pick up more of some special tea. uncle ming, the tea shop owner, always gives him candy and snacks and stuff when he comes by. there’s no way a little fever is gonna make him miss out on free candy. whether he’s nine or twenty-nine (his age is another thing he isn’t thinking about. sometimes he almost forgets he was grown just two years ago. sometimes he forgets that none of this is really real. don’t think about it, don’t think about it, don’t think about it), free sweets are free sweets.
the sun is setting, so nainai tells him to be quick. the tea can’t wait until the morning—the prickly man is coming again tonight, and it’s some special blend he needs as soon as he arrives or something. shen yuan doesn’t really care; he’s just excited to go see uncle ming. so excited he runs the whole way there. it’s still light when he goes inside. uncle ming gives him snacks and sweets, pats his head and praises him for being so helpful. he catches shen yuan up on the neighborhood gossip—there are rumors about this person, that person is pregnant again.
they keep talking until after the sun goes down, and when uncle ming realizes it, he tries to convince shen yuan to stay for the night. his wife and daughter, both betas, are away, and he doesn’t want to send shen yuan to walk back in the dark alone. he’s an omega too, and he says he’d walk shen yuan there himself but his nose isn’t good and it’s dark out. with no way to tell if someone was sneaking up on him, he’d be in danger. it’s fine though. shen yuan’s nose is good, and he’s not stupid. the thought of spending a night away from his nest makes him itchy. plus, he’s already late getting the tea back for that man, and nainai said it was important.
uncle ming scents him with one of his wife’s cloaks, then wraps it around his shoulders. hopefully, he says, the scent will scare off anybody looking for an omega to bother. auntie ming’s scent is nice—not like the aunties at the brothel, but it still makes shen yuan feel secure. the cloak is a little long, but that’s fine. the walk is only ten or so minutes. he’s sure it’ll be fine.
he’s wrong.
it’s been two years, and nothing really even happened, but shen yuan still remembers that alpha’s scent. there’s no reason to remember it. nothing really even happened, just a kiss on the forehead. a hand on his thigh. eyes dark and possessive, like he wanted— but nothing happened. that alpha’s probably on his way home from running some errand, same as shen yuan. he picks up the pace.
the scent follows him, and his middle starts cramping, and when shen yuan accepts that maybe he was closer to his heat than he thought, he starts running. gets maybe three steps before his legs get tangled in auntie ming’s cloak, and before he can hit the ground, there’s a hand pulling the fabric tight against his throat.
that alpha coos at him, calls him sweet. he’s scarred now, ragged claw marks tearing from his eye down to his neck, and shen yuan remembers nainai’s bloody hands after she took the man outside. nainai isn’t here now. shen yuan should’ve stayed with uncle ming.
later, he says he only remembers flashes of what happened that night. hands on his face, his thighs, inching between his— sharp teeth dragging along his neck. he remembers that alpha’s voice, but not what he said. he remembers crying, remembers saying he’d scream if the alpha didn’t stop. he doesn’t remember screaming. he remembers a tingling under his skin, a tightness in his belly, a rush and a wave of something he’s never felt before. he remembers opening his eyes and seeing the alpha lying dead on the ground, his chest caved in and blood dripping from his eyes and his nose and his mouth.
shen yuan remembers picking up the box of tea, half spilled on the ground, and turning to run. he remembers bumping into a man with the coldest eyes he’d ever seen, but a scent that felt familiar. remembers looking up at him from the ground, saying please, please, please—but not what he was asking for. he doesn’t remember anything else.
#me: im not writing a fic for this au; i’ll just ramble about it when the mood strikes#me now: if there’s no dialogue it’s not a fic right???#trying to convince myself that’s true lmaooo#sex pest alpha is dead now tho#god bless it’s what he deserved#a little treat for shen yuan#svsss omegaverse#omegaverse svsss#omega disciple shen yuan#omega disciple shen yuan au#can’t remember the tag rip#omega shen yuan#alpha shen qingqiu#alpha shen jiu#ren zha fanpai zijiu xitong#人渣反派自救系统
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I meant I stand by what I said about fanservice, in general, being simpler than you think (but I don’t want to impose myself, so I was asking if you’d like me to explain what I mean by that.)
Also, I didn’t get offended at all, in fact, I was worried you would get offended, so I’m trying to choose my words very carefully lol but don’t worry about me, I like having conversations with people with different opinions from mine.
Yes, First seems to have a people-pleaser tendency, and that tendency seems to be 100x stronger with Khaotung, although I wouldn’t presume to know what his thoughts are lol, and I don't remember him saying Khaotung changed him to be more himself (that’s interesting though, could you tell me when he said it?). But yeah, I’ve noticed the other gmmtv boys who don't seem to be that close to them have two main things to say about First “he’s always happy” and “he’s always following Khaotung around” lol
I’ve only watched some of his ig lives. I definitely don’t think he’s a simple guy, but to me, he’s easier to understand. Maybe it’s because I feel like I relate to him a lot more, even in the little things like the playlists, books, and movies he’s shared. I know those are curated but that makes me go “yeah I get it” even more haha I see him.
First-loving anon you are SO right there truly is nothing cringe about being an artsy fuckboi and I should be less hard on Khaotung about his personality. But I cannot take anything he does seriously after finding out he loves Call Me By Your Name. I know it’s a legit good book that people deeply connect with but I can’t take anyone seriously who takes that book seriously. I genuinely know there’s nothing wrong with liking CMBYN but me and the type of people who love CMBYN are just such fundamentally different people that it should be illegal to put us even in the same room.
AND YET there’s so much about Khaotung I do relate to as well, he has such an easy going and adaptable personality that I genuinely don’t believe it is true 🤣 that person just does not exist in this world. Don’t get me wrong I think he’s a good and well natured person just a very private one. And obviously everyone curates their personality for the television but I feel like he does it in real life too. I think it’s a form of people pleasing that I’m quite likely projecting onto him but his personality can be quite inconsistent lmaooo so to me it fits.
Anyhow, that first interview is the same one where he says he’s an introvert now so I think you’ve seen it since you’ve referenced it in one of your previous asks. He doesn’t say Khaotung has changed me rather something like ‘I used to think I was an extrovert but I’m starting to see the appeal of an introverted lifestyle recently’ and it gave me war flashbacks to that gmm outing where they spent the entire time doing NOTHING like they just had a series come out and were gunning for a second??? that was so irresponsible alaksjdjdjdsjks
Obviously it wasn’t dire but it was such a needless marketing goof and first shines at these kinds of things. I’m just not convinced he would have missed it without Khaotungs siren call of cozy adorable apathy🤣🤣🤣 so yeah I never buy that he’s an introvert he thrives under attention too much for that.
And yes you can explain what you mean by your comment! I think a lot of my followers like hearing about fanservice if they enjoy a madwoman’s opinions I’m sure they’ll love an actual experts opinion!
#nani answers#I have another set of anons to answer#I’ll get to them I’ve rambled too much today#and I’m too busy thinking about an alternate universe where#poddkhao continued and gawinfirst became a thing
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YIKES lmaooo accidentally made myself cryyyyy re-reading this bit of fanfiction i have no recollection of writinggggg omfg.
tbh i feel like this is worth the read even if you dont give a fraction of a flying fuck about fanfic or about assassins creed lmao bc like. its a very expressive and eloquent exploration of how hard it is to see yourself through the eyes of someone who loves you when you fucking hate yourself 🙃
“My body, it… it’s so weak. And soft. I’m not strong enough to fight anyone. I’m not fast enough to run away.”
“Your mind is just as effective a self-defense tool as any sword or shield.”
“Is it, though?”
“You’re here. You’ve survived things that many people wouldn’t have.”
“That is true. But what I’ve had to give up? The things I’ve had to let happen to me? A man invites himself unto my body. And I don’t want him there. But I can’t stop him. At the end of it, I’m uninjured. But not because I fought him off. I’m uninjured because I negotiated. Because I figured out what he wanted most out of me. And I handed it over. So he wouldn’t have to hurt me in order to steal it. I get robbed all the time. But I don’t lose my most prized items because I’ve learned how to hide them. Or disguise them. Or convince my assailants that my less expensive belongings are worth more than they really are. I never win anything, Alexios. I’m never saved by my intellect. And you should know what I’m talking about, because you are exactly the kind of person who relishes in finding a mark like me. One who is so painfully aware of their own shortcomings that they don’t even try to put up a fight. I survive. I don’t triumph. And if my body were strong, then maybe I could triumph. Someday. In some way.”
“Not everyone can be… strong, or fast. And not everyone can be brilliant. I think if I had a mind like yours, then… I would probably have become someone I could be a lot more proud of than I am. You think having to use wit instead of force to protect yourself is a weakness, but what I wouldn’t give to know how to end a conflict without resorting to extreme violence. I’m not saying that it doesn’t make sense for you to feel how you do. It’s been a long time since I’ve felt that kind of helplessness. I’m just saying that the way you are… the body that you have… there is nothing wrong with you. You are beautiful. And worthy, and powerful in your own right. You, exactly the way you are, have a valuable place in the world. Especially my world. I need you. The version of you that sits before me right now. That’s what I need.”
“I don’t understand. I can’t do anything for you.”
He looked at me for a long time. The calculating look. The one he gets when he’s examining a rockface he’s never climbed before. Looking for footholds and handholds. Scoping out the most efficient rout. Or, perhaps, the look he gets when he’s gauging just how fast he needs to run to clear the jump from one plateau to another. Estimating how much strength he’ll need to conserve to reach the top of a mountain. The only difference between Alexios and a mathematician is that Alexios never actually deals with numbers. But he calculates all the same. He solves equations in a glance that a polymath would need an abacus for. Perhaps he can’t tell you in numbers exactly how far away one handhold is from the next, but he’ll launch himself the precise distance, nonetheless. And it’s because of that look in his eyes that I know that the next words he said to me would be thoroughly considered and thoughtful.
We’ve been this close, and closer, thousands of times by now. But this time felt brand new. Breathtaking. Absolutely ethereal.
His hands slid to rest on my outer thighs, pressing gently so the contact between my inner thighs and his hips was solid. Then he held me by my waist, traveling again to the small of my back, then up higher, moving slow and reverent.
Then he told me, “I wish I had your gift for words so I could tell you what this feels like for me.”
I said, “Just close your eyes and speak.”
I closed my eyes, too, and then after a moment, I heard him sigh. Then he speaks. Quiet, low, and slow.
“This… is the softest place I’ve ever been in my life. As long as I can remember, everything around me has been… sharp. Serrated. Hard. Rough. I’m smashing metal against metal. Bone against stone. I’m cutting, or being cut. I only touch people to hurt them. The most soothing thing I ever feel is someone else’s blood warming my skin. But now I’m here. Between your thighs. And the way your body ‘gives’ under my touch… you don’t even have to hold me to embrace me. You’re so. Soft. And all I have to do to be surrounded by you is touch you. All I have to do is touch you, and now everything jagged in me gets to know what it feels like to be smoothe. I’ve always been so angry about my life. Resentful. Suffering for no good reason. But now I come home to you, and lay beside you and all I can do is thank the Gods for everything I’ve ever been through that turned me into someone who can keep a soft, precious thing like you safe.”
Oh.
One day, someday, maybe it will stop surprising me every time Alexios takes my breath away. Maybe I’ll stop being caught off guard every time he finds a new way to tell me he loves me.
Then he said, “I wish you could appreciate the balance. Appreciate that maybe, in some way, people like you and me are made for each other. Who you are brings such wonderful meaning to who I am and what I’ve been through. I wish who I am could bring similar meaning to you. I wish you could love the things about yourself that are so precious to me.”
I think I left my body in that moment. Sitting there in front of Alexios. In front of this man made of solid audacity and nerve, smelted and forged. I couldn’t remain in my body if I was to stand a chance at fathoming how the words he just said could be said about me by anyone at all, let alone him.
I know I left my body because when I heard him finally say, “Why are you shaking?” I didn’t know why he’d ask such a thing. But I looked down at my hands, and yes, they were trembling. And I felt myself slam back into my corporeal form - heavy, and unsteady, like an earthquake.
Indeed, I think I was shaking because my whole world had just been rattled. My entire self-concept, shifted like a fault line. That there should be any use for the utter desolation I’ve suffered through? That all the things I hate most about myself could bring any meaning at all to another person’s suffering? I was shaking with the exertion of struggling to hold my understanding together. But when I answered him, all I said was, “I’m sorry.”
He held both of my hands.”You’re sorry? What for? What did I say that made you think you should be sorry?”
The grief in my throat was so thick, I could barely speak. But I forced the words out: “I’m letting you down.” And right around this moment was when tears overwhelmed my eyelids. And I think I could hear Alexios’s heart shattering.
He gasped a little and then said, “What? By the Gods, no, no. That’s not it at all. Never.” He let go of my hands, but only to slide his arms the rest of the way around me. I felt his lips on my forehead, and then my ear against his chest. He held me just like he did that very first time. It took my breath away then, and it still takes my breath away now. “I don’t ever want you to believe anything other than that I’m so, so proud of you. Proud to be with you. Honored that you’ll even look at me. I didn’t say all those things in criticism. I said them to try to help you see how much you mean to me.”
That only broke me even more. And racked me with even more guilt. I didn’t want to disappoint him more by apologizing again, so I didn’t. Not out loud, anyway. In my head, I was pleading. Praying. I’m sorry your love is wasted on me.
Then he looked down at me and said, “...But you can’t, can you? You really… you honestly just can’t.”
He pulled me in close again, gently swaying, rocking. And I heard him say, “I’m so, so sorry for what’s been taken from you.
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“we shared a bed for space reasons but now I’m kind of in love with you” with lance please!!!!!!!! (I’m such a sucker for lance lmaooo)🌲
words: 1.6k
notes: here you go! x
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Lance couldn’t stop thinking about it, and it was beginning to drive him insane.
It was so simple. He had done it with other people many times in the past, so why was now any different? Why hadn’t his heart stopped beating at one hundred miles per hour from the moment he rolled out of the that bed the morning after?
The morning after. He snickered when he thought about it, as if the actions of before had been some kind of erotic fantasy - it hadn’t. The two of you had complained the entire time, eventually stopped talking and then fell asleep.
At least, you had fallen asleep.
Lance had stayed up the majority of the night trying to convince himself that the deepening pit in his stomach was purely out of dread for having to be forced to sleep next to another human being - you especially. He talked himself through it, even managed to convince himself for a little while.
Until you had rolled over and Lance saw your face, smooshed up against the soft fabric of the pillow, hair getting caught in the drool running from your mouth. His heartbeat sped up then, and the lies he had been telling himself now became almost impossible to believe.
Now, he sat in the kitchen, staring off into thin air. He tapped his fingertips together idly, trying to release some of the nervous energy building up in his system. Usually, he would do this by arguing with Keith, or perhaps going into the training room for a few hours, but neither of those options were appealing to him right now. All he wanted to do was find you, and it was this very thought that scared him into complete silence.
He had flirted with a number of people in his lifetime. He had had significant others, had enjoyed a pretty diverse romantic life - but this was so different. Different in the fact that you and him weren’t even together, and from the signals you had been putting out, you never would be. Once upon a time, Lance had been able to deal with that news with little disappointment to expose his true feelings - but the bed had been the trigger. Being forced to sleep beside you had done something to him that he wasn’t sure he would be able to reverse.
And now, here he was, staring into thin air as he tried desperately to figure out what to do.
Because he could hardly just act the exact same around you, could he? He had seen you a total of four times in the past week since the incident had occurred, and all four times, he had left the room to go and calm himself down before his heart truly did escape his chest cavity.
He literally lived with you. He couldn’t keep going on like this.
He groaned and ducked his head in his hands. Why couldn’t his Inner-Smooth-Guy come out now? He needed that side of himself more than anything right now.
“Lance?”
He hadn’t even realised the light had been turned off until you were flicking it on and he was forced to wince through the sudden intrusion of brightness. In fact, he hadn’t even realised it was getting dark until now.
He turned in his seat to face you, trying desperately to keep his usual glow on his face. Hopefully you wouldn’t notice the way his eyes briefly trailed up your figure - it wasn’t as if much was on show. You wore one of the ships customary white fluffy dressing gowns, similar to the one Lance always paraded around in. If he looked past how clean your gown was, he was almost able to imagine that you were wearing his.
“What the hell are you doing in here?” you asked, making your way towards the coffee machine. “You look like a creature in the night just staring into thin air like that.”
“Yeah, well, you look like a marshmallow.”
What?
He cursed himself. Why had he said that? Out of any insult he could have given, he chose to call you a marshmallow?
You snickered, looking over your shoulder with an amused smile. “I’ll be taking that as a compliment.”
“It wasn’t,” Lance spat out, folding his arms over his chest and looking away from you before you noticed the bright pink hue flushing his cheeks. “What are you getting a coffee for, anyway? Surely it’s too late to be drinking that stuff now.”
“I have work to get done,” you replied. “Which means an all-nighter for me, baby.”
Oh, sweet mother of god.
Don’t call me baby. Don’t call me baby. Don’t call me baby.
Lance coughed into his fist. “You probably shouldn’t be staying awake for too long. You’ll burn yourself out.”
You shrugged. “Nothing I haven’t done before. And besides, that’s what the coffee’s for - it’s gonna keep me going until I’m actually ready to fall asleep.”
“What work do you have to do anyway?”
“Some stuff with Pidge’s computer system.”
“You know absolutely nothing about computers.”
You frowned, glancing at him with furrowed brows. “You’re being meaner than usual tonight. What’s wrong?”
Lance froze. He knew he had overdone it, but it was purely for himself. Even as his heartbeat slammed in his chest as he spoke to you, he was still trying to convince himself that this was nothing more than a natural reaction. It would blow over soon enough, and he could go back to pretending you were his worst enemy and that every other person in the world was more appealing than you.
But god, when you were looking at him like that, it was so much more difficult to play that roll.
He swallowed thickly and tried to turn away, but his eyes were locked on you and he found himself slipping. You had turned to face him fully now, leaning against the counter with your fingers wrapped tight around the coffee cup. The collar of your dressing gown was tugged up, ticking at your jaw in the most adorable way possible; Lance was losing his grip. All that convincing he had done for the past week was slipping through his fingers, and he was doing very little to get it back.
He shook his head slowly.
“Do you remember when we shared that bed last week?” he suddenly blurted out.
He would be a fool to miss the way you tried to nuzzle your head into the collar of your dressing gown, any attempts to hide the heat rising on your face.
“Uh… vaguely,” you replied. “Why?”
“Did it bother you that we had to … you know … . sleep beside each other?”
You raised a brow. “I mean, I didn’t really have a choice. It was either that or sleep on the floor.”
“No. What I mean is, did it bother you that it was me you had to sleep beside?”
You froze. Lance watched your expression closely, needing confirmation that he wasn’t going absolutely insane, that you had been at least effected by Lance’s presence that night. You continued to stare at him, fingers tightening on the coffee mug.
And then, “It didn’t bother me, no.”
Lance exhaled. “Did it have any effect on you at all?”
“Why are you asking me all this?”
“Just answer the question.”
“Okay, maybe a little bit,” you mumbled, shifting slightly from one foot to the other. “You’re not exactly the most ugly looking human being, Lance. I’m wise enough to see that much.”
Lance’s eyes popped open. That was a lot more than what he thought he was going to get, and it spurred him on.
Perhaps a little too much.
“That’s good. That’s really good, because we shared a bed for one night and now I think I’m falling in love with you.”
You gasped, genuinely gasped. Lance heard it, but he was too far gone now to back out. He quickly arose from his chair and made his way over to you, but he made no move to touch you. You stared up at him, eyes wide, body still - Lance wanted to make sure you wanted this before he tried anything more.
“Actually, that’s a lie,” he said. “I know I’m falling in love with you, and it’s been terrifying me for the past week. That’s why I’ve been so hostile towards you lately - more than usual. I just needed to convince myself that I still … I still had a grudge against you, or whatever it was we had going on before all this happened. The idea of falling for you-”
“It was scary,” you finished, voice barely above a mumble.
Lance slowly nodded. “Terrifying.”
You swallowed, turned and set your coffee mug down on the counter. You then turned back to Lance, looked into his eyes, and it was then that he knew he had made the right decision. Say it was rushed, say it was pointless, say he was unworthy of a person like you, but he wouldn’t redo this moment for anything.
Especially not whenever you reached up and wrapped your arms around his shoulders, tugging him that little bit closer to you. Your lips brushed against his own teasingly as you spoke, your voice a whisper. Lance shuddered, closing his eyes against the feel of your breath on his lips, so close yet so distant.
“I know exactly how you feel,” you whispered. “Because we shared a bed for one night, and I think I’m falling in love with you, too.”
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Whoops sorry about the double question! To make it up to you I will now think of three things to ask you >:)
I'm doing well! I'm going into my third year next week so I'm taking this week to catch up with friends and prepare myself for that. It's also my 20th birthday soon so I'm trying to think of ways to celebrate lol
God I get how tiring downloading all that content is. It's probably my least favorite part of the process. And I've started my set! It's going almost comically slowly but we get there when we get there I suppose
Writing these asks (this one in particular) makes me feel like I'm drafting a letter to a loved one at sea. I don't usually type like this ((i am actually a master of disguise)) but once I start using proper capitalization and punctuation I feel like I have to. I should've started this with My Dearest Joanna, or something
Okay this got long! Sorry about that. My two questions for you today are:
1) Are you aware of the hammerhead bat? If not, would you like to be?
and 2) What's your favorite thing about yourself?
Bonus 3rd (that you don't have to answer since this got longer than intended): Realistically, who would your Greek god parent be, and is it different than who you would want it to be?
Yours faithfully,
PSC Anon :)
third year, that’s very exciting! and the big 2-0, so much is happening for you!! when’s your bday? dude, downloading is so 🤬 especially t*rrenting, oh my god that takes forever. I’m proud of you for starting though!!
a loved one at sea LMAOOO that’s a very cute way of describing it 🥲
1) no…is it an animal of some sort or is this a meme I missed out on because I’m too old for the internet?
2) i wish you asked me this a few months back and i could’ve said my harley quinn-esque hair probably my sense of humor. I won’t be a stand-up comedian any time soon but my friends think I’m funny and so does my therapist, so that’s all that matters.
3) ofc I’m gonna answer this one, gotta stay true to my url. when I was a kid, I was convinced I’d be a daughter of Athena, Apollo would be cool too. but realistically, it’d be Nemesis (my friend actually told me this) or Hypnos. what about you, who would yours be? 👀
#asks#anon#pscentral anon#I really loved this one#sorry i take forever to answer though 💀#my adhd’s been so bad
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aww of course ! you’re so sweet and i feel like i could say anything and you’d listen and care and that means so much to me. it seriously warms my heart💗”what i deserve to expect” shhdhdhdj AWWW
stop it youre so so cute omg. yes it was insane ! no way to ask questions or understand if it’s just a video and it wasn’t worth thousands at all !! yeah i don’t trust myself enough to handle the stress of it right now, i had so so many things going on during the lockdown that weren’t even Covid related and it changed how i wanted to live my life, and i don’t wanna spend the money if i know i won’t finish it. i know i want to one day though, but had i done it when i graduated it would feel like i was doing it to be “normal” to other people. like i really enjoy my job, and it’s easy enough to get promoted (though i’m waiting a while before applying for said promotions) and i don’t need a degree to do so, so it’s good it can be in the future. and also i am absolutely terrified of people my age, i never want to feel as judged as i did in high school (people weren’t even explicitly mean to me, i just tried to be like everyone else so much and it’s exhausting to be stared down 24/7 lmaooo) but thank you, that means so much, you’re so sweet omg. and i’m sorry for the long rant !! ahhhh
yes i love creative writing !! i used to write “books” as a child and i like writing stories now, and basically any assigned creative writing/ one with a prompt makes me happy. or writing about myself/my life is fun, i like the little details of stories and try to focus on those and the bigger picture. i really want to write a book about my life or based on it. so pretty much anything is what i mean hahaha what do you like writing? i can totally see it too, you’re an amazing writer. ooooh short stories are so fun !! what kind of media class is it ? oh really wow, yeah that sounds like a really emotional job too. i want to foster in the future, i want to help in some way yknow? but it’s hard to imagine doing either of those for work, and i don’t mind stress sometimes but i’d get too invested in it all and try to fix things that i can’t. but definitely agree, it’s the beauty of life to get through struggles and see what’s on the other side, i’m so grateful for everything i’ve gone through and will go through even though it sucks when you’re in it!
it feels brand new!!! my favorite is changing the sheets, it’s a total reset. i do too !! what’s that show about ? i haven’t watched anything new in a while but i really like true crime shows and if i’m doing something around the house i put on friends or any show like that that I’ve seen before !!
yessss i didn’t get it till recently, it’s not going away because i need someone else to do it for me !! no that doesn’t make me uncomfortable at all don’t worry hehe it just gave me butterflies 😳 that’s fair though, i used to only come once or twice but recently it’s so many times, not in a row though i cant do that! it’s just so random, and i cant ignore it if i’m alone or it gets worseee !! yess, i’m so touch starved i’m convinced i would come just from someone kissing my neck, ugh. if you don’t mind my asking, have you ever been in a relationship ?
-💟
omg djkjdkjd literally so, so fucking happy you feel that cared for. it means so much to me. I'm so happy you feel like you're being listened to and cared for <3
exactly, thousands of money really wasn't worth it. like, I had one professor who didn't even do lectures, just posted slideshows and textbook chapters to do. and, like, what was I paying for? I'm so proud of you that you reflected on what you want out of life and have decided to do what makes you feel happy and not go through any unnecessary stress, it's so amazing you're prioritizing yourself like that. absolutely, do it when ready and when you genuinely want to! and omg, if you apply for the promotions, I hope it goes well! it sounds like a great opportunity. like, definitely do postsecondary if and when it feels right and you truly, absolutely want it. and I totally understand, some people in high school won't explicitly be mean, but have this vague kind of judging going on. I am sorry you went through that, though. I hope you feel a bit more comfortable with yourself now too 💕 if it's any consolation, people in university, at least in mine, are way less judgemental. everyone is focused on their own studies and goals and career paths, so can't afford to waste time making others feel bad. also, people are just so much more mature and welcoming - like, everyone here are all doing their own thing, dealing with their programs and discovering what they want, and having that common ground with each other makes everyone so much more understanding. and please don't apologize! I like hearing you speak, and on this account, we love the rants, so it is one hundred percent good with me.
omg prompts are so, so much fun! it's so cool how a single-worded prompt can create this flood of ideas and inspiration for a full-blown story. oooh, and for sure, writing about oneself can be so much fun. it can also help so much with self-reflection - like, writing it out helps so much to sometimes put things in perspective. omg you totally should work on a book on your life! that would be so, so cool and interesting, and I feel like the writing process would be such a journey. do you journal? and I really love writing contemporary as of late, and I like focusing on the concepts of humanity, family, queerness, friendship, coming of age, that kind of stuff. and omg thank you so much, you're so sweet! hehe, I'm glad my less than wholesome thoughts on here are well written, hehe. and the media class is on communication and how media and technology directs messages to society. and it's so admirable you want to help people, it's an amazing kind of work, so long as you're also at peace with it. and omg, I like the way your mind works, it's so true. it doesn't feel good in the moment, but once we push through it, the relief and peace will be the most beautiful thing.
changing the sheets and making your bed hits so different, it's the best. I'm not totally sure what it's about - ik it's set in high school, and it has Kim Taeri, this actress I love. do you have any true crime recs? and omg... I literally have "Friends" playing on my television as I type this LMAO. I also keep it on in the background for so much!
I feel you, I'd do anything to have someone else help me when I'm in the mood. omg, butterflies? hehe, you're so cute. I honestly find it really attractive and hot when someone can come several times in a day, gives me all kinds of ideas. same, I can barely do it in a row, I'll be too tired down there, haha. omg, I completely understand. that is such a cute idea you've put in my head, though. 💞
and no, I've never been in a relationship! I haven't had many legit crushes through the years, but even then, it just never really worked out. what about you? if you're comfortable telling me, ofc! <3
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♡TAG CHAIN♡
i was tagged by @harry-did-that who constantly challenges me with the toughest questions and scenarios lol!!! Thanks honey!!💖💖💖💖
im tagging @harryzayn, @heliosfleur, @haesthete, @luvinari, @anotherblackharrie, and anyone else who wants to (i just finished this and im exhausted and can’t think of anyone else lol!!)
Rules: answer the questions given to you by the tagger, write questions of your own, and tag people!
🌸The questions I was given🌸
1. when and how did you become a fan? give me all the details and feelings hit me with that nostalgia! Tbh I was one of those snooty hoes who hated wmyb and was like “If they’re saying what makes you beautiful is that you don’t know your beautiful....... Then what happens when you finally think you’re beautiful??? They probably wouldn’t think your beautiful anymore” laskjdlkajslkdja!! But after faking like I hated the song, this girl in my science class came up to me and was like *Slams down some random teen mag with the boys on the cover* “Pick one!!”......... And I was like “Uhhhhh..... No thanks??” and she just kept getting on my nerves about picking one, she eventually said if i picked one that she’d leave. So I looked............. and I said *pointing to harry and zayn* “Either him or him” and she had the nerve to be like “No!!! You cant have him (Zayn) he’s mine!”........ me:
and since that moment of childish, superficial, decision-making........ I’ve been a dead hoe 4 harry.
2. whats ur fave 1d moment/memory? I’m blanking all of a sudden alksjdlakjslkdj!!! All I can think of rn is when harry almost died on 1d day tryna pull that cute ass stunt
Pretty much..... 1d day in general laksjdlkajls!!!
(Me too harry lol) Harry looked so divine??? So yeah lol!! 1d day for sure
3. if you were to fight harry how would you go about it
Sis........... I’ve been dreaming about this. In a perfect scenario, we’d be friends already so he knows that i’m fighting him with love from the deepest, darkest, coldest, crevices of my heart. So, it’d have to be a time when we’re just hanging out somewhere, preferably in someones (preferably mine) apartment/house. We’d be watching queer eye or something gay, and discussing what from this seasons gucci line we’re gonna buy. When all of a sudden i’ll go in for a random, friendly hug, and he’ll accept...............................................................To his DEMISE!!! CAUSE I would bite his ear (not off, just to clarify lol!! Just a nip lol!!) and go straight for his neck and choke him out alskdjlksjldjka!! He’d probably start panicking, but at this point i’d tell him how long i’ve been waiting to do this, and that i’m doing this out of love............ nothing but pure love. So when he blacks out and wakes up laid out on the couch, with me placing a cold ice pack on his head, he’ll probably ask me what tf happened....... So i’ll tell him the truth, and tell him that he fainted and started convulsing and that i had to call 911 (or whatever the emergency # is wherever we are) and they told me what to do over the phone; and that by the time they got there he had settled down and was fine, but i needed to apply a cold press to his head where he fell and make sure he has solid food on his stomach.😇😇😇
4. so like, if we had 1d (ot4/ot5 idc) locked in a room and given them truth serum slkdnlksdnf sorry for this au but, what 3 questions would you ask them (feel free to do more than 3 its been almost 8 years full of lies so)
I’ll give you one for each year of lies aksljdlakjslkd!!
1- What the fuck were Zayn and Harry laughing about on 1d day?
2- What is each of their honest opinions on the others??
3- Crystabel Riley....... Thats all I’ll say on that..... But I want the truth lol!!
4- Why tf Zayn had the nerve to say that he and Harry never talked???
5- The Infinity video????
6- If they hadn’t known Zayn was gonna leave, who would they truly want to leave the band????? Or! If they could sacrifice one of the others for Zayn to stay, who would they sacrifice??????
7- Did Liam really think that Japan would be hotter cause its “near Australia”??????? (a waste of a question, but a question i need to ask for myself lol!!)
8- And because i’m nosy and would never ever ask any other time or under other circumstances; Out of all of the people they’ve been rumored to have been dating/dated, how many have they actually dated? and which ones??*Mainly this is for harry, but i’ll ask the others cause...... you know.....
5. tell me some of your fave people on here (treat ppl with kindness spread love n all that look at me being a proper Harrie™)
I have a couple of faves lol! I love @harryzayn she’s amaaaazingggggggg even tho she tries me on a daily basis alskjdlkajsldkj!! Oh!! And her moodboards (x) are spectacular, she’s legit the reason why I started doing moodboards (barely lol!! I’m lazy y’all, but she's not lol!!)
@haesthete She always has amazing hontent and is very sweet and kindddddd lol!! And is always (in my opinion) on the right side of henny serious harry drama
@luvinari is an absolute angel who blesses my dash with harry and ariana and others i can think of rn lol!!
@bluehydrangeia She fills my dash with my mother lana del rey, harry, and aesthetic!! That and I never fail to get more literature knowledge from her lol!
Theres a lot more, but when I’m put on the spot i blank out lol!! If we’ve EVER talked, or interacted you’re probably on this list too lol!!
6. signature scent/ favorite perfume(s)?
I don’t really have a signature perfume, but I like to mix cherry and vanilla body sprays lol!! That! Or warm vanilla honey/toasted hazelnut from b&bw
7. please tell me a random fact or story about you, give me that Exclusive knowledge
Ummmmm....... My *tries to remember while sitting down* right side of my hip is double jointed lol!! That and i entered 2 different kinds of writing contest and won both of them lol!! Ya gurl is actually good at writing believe it or not alskjdlakjs!!! Bonus! I’ve actually gotten too deep in my feels a couple times and wrote fics for @harryzayn to read lmaooo!!!
8. money, body issues, and all that shit aside, what would your dream fashion aesthetic be?
..........Rianne you hate me lol!! I have about 50 aslkdjalskjdl!! So I’ll give you a top 5!
1- Rocker Chic
2- Simplistic Minimalist
3- 70s Kween
4- Eclectic Bitch
5- Rich Business Hoe
(Bonus!)6- Flashy young rich trophy wife having a night out
9. would you rather have: the cut bits of carpool karaoke like the mcdonalds drive through, audio’s of all the 70 songs harry wrote (yes including baby honey), the infinity music video, the 900 hours of unseen this is us footage, harry’s dunkirk audition tape, a recording of that alleged hour long zarry phonecall when zayn left, or a copy of nialls folder full of unseen selfies with his boys. you kno what im nice you can have two
You are so fucking rude rianne alskjdlkajsjdalj!! I’m gonna go with...... All 70 of harry’s hidden ass songs. And............. *has mini existential crisis cause i can’t choose between the zarry phone call or the this is us footage* I’m gonna choose the this is us footage cause that would be a lot more positive *whispers: but if you want to be a super nice, cool, amazing, totally unique, game changing, never replicated friend........ You’d let me take the zarry call too lol!! *
10. whats something you’re proud of?
*Thinks hard for about 20 minutes.....* Umm I think im proud of the fact that, any musical instrument i’ve learned (3-4) i’ve taught myself??
11. something you regret?
Being too nice to people who didn’t deserve that from me.
12. what bothers you? here’s a chance to… go off
People who have literally no musical talent, but feel the need to go on mile long rants about musicians/artist they don’t like and try to simplify any musical or artistic process like making (GOOD) music is simple and easy.
On the other hand, musicians with absolutely no musicianship at all, who get by based on looks or a really weirdly strong fan base despite....their....lack........of talent??? (Bonus trash points if they’re also just really shitty people in general)
People who feel the need to bring up negative shit in the middle of anything happy. Like??? We could all be having a party over harry painting his nails black, and they could be like “Why tf is his nail polish chipped already??? He was probably picking at it cause the devil jeff made him do it” Like????? Shut tf up cindy (Also this is a made up scenario lol!!)
...... Pms?? The thought of having to pay bills?? Taxes??? The government???? The patriarchy??????
💖💕✨🌻 so here’s my questions🌻✨💕💖
1. There are two types of people in this world. What are the two types?
2. If you had to lock away 3 of ot5 in an underground cave, who would you lock away??
3. If you could have a never-ending candle that smelled like anything you wanted, what fragrance would you want it to be?
4. An interesting au question i just though of lol! You’re chilling at home, when all of a sudden you get a call from Harry. You answer it only to find out that he has you on a party line with the other boys. They’re all panicking cause they’re having different emergencies and they all need your singular help, but they’re all in different locations 20 minutes away from you. They’re all convinced you’re their best friend and that you’ll help them first. You can only help 3 and the other two have to figure their problem out on their own, or face the consequences. Who do you help first, and so on? (and yes the bottom 3 will be mad at you. The person in 2nd place will be disappointed but they’ll eventually get over it.)
5. Whats your favorite *insert ur fave 1d member here* look?
6. What would be the scariest monster you could imagine?
8. If your life was a book, what would it be titled?
6. Quick! You just won the lottery, what are the first 3 things you buy?
9. Would you rather have: True love, but live in less than ideal conditions. Or Be rich, but be married to someone you despised?
10. Whats something you’re proud of?
11. Three personality traits you hate?
12. What are you afraid people see when they look at you?
#this was A LOT#alskjdlkjlajdsjd#but fun nonetheless!#I love tags y'all#like 9 times out of 10 if y'all tag me in something#i'll do it lol!#thanks again rianne💖💖💖💖#tag
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I loved your discussion about Aaron and money. One thing I will never understand though, is why Robert didn't think using his money to buy a house wasn't investing in his future with Aaron? Liv would have probably thought he was a hero if he'd have stepped up. Aaron would have taken more convincing, but it'd have been less painful than the actual outcome. And Robert saw the Mill as an investment so why didn't he think about himself and Aaron rather than Liv? That whole thing makes no sense to me
ok, listen, we all know i like to call robert sugden out on his shit and that i honestly believe that it can’t be ooc if it’s canon
but this is the one thing that’s happened where i’m like…. #justiceforrobertsugden this is unfair and exists purely out of necessity for the existence of two plots (aaron robbing rebecca’s money and robert and aaron arguing over the 100k)
THIS IS THE ONE TIME IM LIKE ROBERT DESERVED BETTER THAN THIS PLOT SET UP 😂😂
i feel dirty for saying this bc this is not my mo buT THATS HOW IT BE
their explanation for it was that rob had it invested and couldn’t have actually pulled it out without losing an unnecessary amount of money (although before aaron allowed liv to buy it, they were looking at little one bedrooms out of the village bc apparently he has just never had to pay anyone rent since he’s been in emmerdale so he’s never factored it into his outgoings which… is true actually lmao rob)
(and rob did not even make that much money on his investment in the end lmaooo who’s gonna make the bitcoin joke here)
tbh
look
i have an issue with robert’s money in canon
it’s the thing that keeps me up at night
bc it makes no sense
no ones money makes sense in this show tbqh
so i just don’t like to think about it
and i also hate h a t e how a lot of how they portrayed buying the mill - this was in a period where the show seemed to sort of forget that robert and aaron were engaged tbh???? or that’s how it came off idk rob was just in those scenes like oh boy i’m excited for ur new house aaron
AARON BOUGHT A HOUSE WITH LIV’S MONEY WITHOUT EVEN GIVING ROBERT THE HEADS UP
although i guess it’s liv’s so he didn’t actually need the heads up lmao
although rob still somehow funded the MASSIVE AMOUNT OF RENOVATION THAT THAT HOUSE NEEDED
but actually ok i just thought that a lot of the buying the mill stuff was incredibly clunkily done and…. i mean, ultimately they chose to use it as a chance to focus on aaron and his feelings about gordon’s money - which is incredibly fair, but they didn’t do it very well and it annoys me to this day bc honestly give that the depth it deserves
i think ultimately it was sort of supposed to facilitate rebecca and aaron coming to an understanding and rob and rebecca finding a relationship grounded in friendship more than anything else (which then built up into the jealousy plot), whereby robert stopped trying to manipulate her and rebecca started to respect aaron enough to stop actively trying to bang his fiancé, but that all sort of became moot when robert and rebecca actually boned, i guess? or did it i don’t know it’s all very confusing
they just made a lot of narrative choices that weren’t, in my opinion, the choices they should have been making to get to a point where aaron was being driven to extremes by jealousy and where rebecca felt like robert telling her it was over with aaron to get her into bed immediately and then telling her otherwise the next day was some sort of surprising betrayal to her? there were tighter ways to structure certainly that part of the story, i think
even though it gave us a number of my favourite scenes from 2016 lolol
this is the one thing where i’m just like *throws hands in the air* we don’t know
THE TANGENTS THIS POST HAS TAKEN i have a lot of hindsight feelings about everything, clearly
i digress
😂😂 tbh, as with all things on the show that relate to both living situations and money, it’s best to just not think about it too much yk
this is what i tell myself when i think of it and make mental stabby motions towards it
this answer is a mess bc that’s what my feelings are towards this situation 😌👌🏼
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i just watched little miss sunshine again for the first time since i was like 7 and oh my G*D i have feelings and i’m going to write a testimonial to how movies are basically the only thing that can make me feel intense emotions hard enough to make me cry bro i cried at like 5 different points in this movie i don’t remember it being so WHOLESOME also spoiler alerts <3
the only thing i remembered before watching this movie again was that the van didn’t work so they had to push it, the brother wanted to be a pilot then found out he was color blind so couldn’t then freaked out (which i DON’T remember being such an emotional and intense scene!!!), the grandpa died, and a hazy memory of olive’s performance at the end. then when the scene came on where she dedicated the dance to her grandpa and the announcer was like “oh is your grandpa in the audience?” and she was like “no he’s in the back of our trunk” i got a memory dragged up of my mom finding that scene amusing WHICH brings me on to my next point which is more s*ft and p*rsonal
i was hesitant to watch this movie again bc it was a movie my mom liked and i watched with her a few times which would usually automatically ruin it for me but i remember it being a good movie so i watched it anyways and decided it’s not ruined for me bc 1) it really is a good movie and 2) it reminded me of this fanfiction i read lmaooo which is actually such a good fanfic imma just screenshot the part i want and put it here (with anything that could direct you to the fandom crossed out bc i’m not trying to expose myself) but obviously i’m Not the characters in this fanfiction and thus won’t relate to everything, but the basic jist of the paragraph that’s like...”and he never told her, but somehow she knows that this is the movie his mom used to turn on when his dad was gone and she came home drunk and for once without a man. he would sit in his cowboy pajamas on the sticky floor and eat stale cheese puffs and watch the von trapps dance around while his mom laid passed-out drunk on the couch behind him. and she knows that, somehow, watching that movie convinces him, for just a moment, that he’s a little boy and his mom cares enough to stick around, even if that was never true. and she knows that every time it is on tv, he will watch it, every minute of it.”...i was like...oh okay..points were Made...maybe...little miss sunshine is my sound of music? so now this movie feels special to me not only bc it’s really really good but bc of that but anyways! i want to talk about sum reasons why this movie is really really good!
i keep using the word ‘good’ too much and the pretentious emo poetry writing part of me is bothered by it but the part of me that can’t be bothered to make this brain dump grammatically correct and...good...prevails. so anyways first of all beauty pageants can absolutely screw off and this movie did a really good job getting across that message without explicitly telling you. olive dancing to superfreak and everybody in her family joining her when they tried to kick her off was wholesome. and then something about the uncle running to beat the clock to get her registered in after he was shown throughout the movie not caring about life was wholesome. and then let me reiterate, the brother finding out he was color blind scene!!!!! oooohhh my g****d. oh my g*d. i physically felt the intensity. and then olive and the grandpa’s relationship? wholesome. him not being able to see her perform after coaching her thru? tugs at the heartstrings. the dad telling her not to eat icecream annoyed tf out of me and the families reactions to that were priceless and yes, wholesome. it just had really well developed characters and good humor like them sneaking the grandpa out of the hospital lmao idk it was just a full circle movie. g*d i love indie movies
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You said anyone else who wants to do it and this looks fun!! Sorry for turning up somewhat uninvited lmao xxx
How many works do you have on ao3? 10 currently!!
What's your total ao3 word count? 122,915!!
How many fandoms have you written for and what are they? I only write for Merlin lmao
What are your top 5 fics by kudos? 1) Exceptional Circumstances. 2) A Ghost of the Past. 3) You and I. 4) Breaking History. 5) Knight of the Cart.
Do you respond to comments? Why or why not? I do respond to comments because I appreciate people who take the time to comment so much and I like chatting with people about their headcanons etc :))
What is the fic you've written with the angstiest ending? Ooh I have a couple of wips that I know the ending of but I don't want to spoil then now (especially as one is multiple stories long). Published? I think my angstiest is probably Hitting the Ground (in which Merlin fails to convince Morgana to change her murder-path and they give up trying to reconcile)
Do you write crossovers? Not as a rule. I did something ages ago as a joke but I sent it to one person and never published it. I will not be disclosing details.
Have you ever received hate on a fic? Luckily, no, haha. I always welcome constructive criticism though (cheers to the people who have ever pointed out one of the myriad of typos in my work lmao)
Do you write smut? If so, what kind? Abso-fucking-loutely not. (No hate if you do!! I just don't like it lmao)
Have you ever had a fic stolen? Not that I know of :)
Have you ever had a fic translated? Nope!!
Have you ever co-written a fic before? No, I haven't. I probably wouldn't be very good at it anyway because I can't even agree with myself about what characters should do next, least of all another person lmaoo
What's your all time favourite ship? Merthur because I am basic. Also Pynch is a close second, as is Bluesey. And Patrochilles :) and me x Clara Oswald hehehe
What's a wip you want to finish but don't think you ever will? I started a snowbaz fic when I was twelve but I stopped, and I'm just not as invested as I was in the characters now :( it was also my first fic and I really don't want to read that writing ughhh
What are your writing strengths? Honestly? I'm not sure. I guess people have said I can write quite poetically sometimes? I hope that's true :)
What are your writing weaknesses? I find it really difficult to flow from descriptive passages to dialogue. Also if I've spent a day writing essays and move on to creative writing, it feels really clunky. And I reuse phrases a lot.
What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic? I'm not against it! The only time I've ever really done this is when using spells (which I usually derive from either the show itself, Old English, Welsh, Scottish Gaelic, Arabic, Latin and French for a bit of spice. I don't speak any of these languages.) Or dragonlord tongue. I'll usually put it on italics and/or bold if it's magic.
What was the first fandom you wrote for? Actively? Carry On by Rainbow Rowell. I was obsessed when I was 12/13 lmaooo. I didn't publish it though, thank GOD. (though I wrote loads of creative writing at primary school that I didn't realise was fanfiction because I didn't know it was a thing. It would usually include OCs and would be set in a similar universe)
What's your favourite fic you've written? Arghh I don't know!! I'll probably always have a soft spot for Exceptional Circumstances, as it was the first fic I published and is still my longest. It was also getting comments on this that made me think "huh, maybe I'm not as shit at writing as I thought". But I do love A Green Dawn and Hitting the Ground because I think those are technically the best ones I've written to date.
Tagging: @arthur-rex @tcs-main and anyone else!! xxx
Ask game that @bbcfandomsuniverse recently did (hope you don’t mind me jumping in 😊)
Their post is over here in the larger font like above with the questions if they are easier for you to see! But from here on the text will be in the standard regular font, Thank you!
How many works do you have on AO3?
-Nine? And far too many WIPs that are like two paragraphs from being finished
What’s your total AO3 word count?
-92,277
How many fandoms have you written for and what are they?
-On AO3, 4 but In my little book of things and my docs a lot more…
BBC Merlin, Mortal instruments fandom, Durarara, The Umbrella Academy (*ones not posted* Penny dreadful, Robin of sherwood, BBC Atlantis… And other horribly written things for many many anime and manga series)
What are your top 5 fics by kudos?
• Rain Before The Rainbow- 146
• Snow and Powdered Sugar- 49
• Broken Raven- 39
• The Ingenuous- 21
• I Do Not Love You Except Because I Love You- 20
Do you respond to comments, why or why not?
Yes! I always try to respond to comments and continue what whatever they talked about or just give my thanks.
What’s the fic you’ve written with the angstiest ending?
It’s not currently posted but it’s another one of my fics that is almost finished and pretty much is a retelling of the Diamond of the day of BBC Merlin if events had gone differently with saving a bunch of characters including mordred, daegal, kara, sefa, Gilli among many others and it’s very angsty. Like tears and sobbing angsty…
Do you write crossovers? if so, what is the craziest one you’ve written?
I actually wrote ONE crossover that I never posted and it was a disaster… I will never mention it again.
Have you ever received hate on a fic?
I wouldn’t call it hate but it was simply someone voicing their opinion on the fic which yeah… Kinda you know hurtful to me but i’m just a stranger to them that’s writing fanfiction so…
Do you write smut? if so what kind?
Nope no nopitty no
Have you ever had a fic stolen?
To my knowledge no. And also who ever does steal my fics you picked the most worst person to do it from XD. (But in all seriousness if someone ever finds one of my fics posted anywhere else or under a different user name please message me here on Tumblr 😊)
Have you ever had a fic translated?
No, but again I’m completely open to it and would love for my fics to branch out to all of the non-english speaking audiences.
Have you ever co-written a fic before?
No, but I would love to work with another writer on a fic! I actually really want to but have no clue how to even go about it.
What’s your all time favorite ship?
Oooo, I’m gonna go back to my beginning fandom roots and say a platonic relationship I love is from an anime called Princess TuTu and it’s Fakir & Muto… I watched the anime along with another one called Sugar Sugar Rune when I was like 4 and they will always hold a special place in my heart along with the Original Fruits basket and the Manga…
What’s a WIP that you want to finish but don’t think you ever will?
Probably one of my Umbrella Academy fics that I had started to write. Mostly because when a lot of stuff happened with the very strong opinions in certain comments it made me loose inspiration and hope in writing for the fandom in a way. But it was my favourite idea and now I can barely look at it anymore…
What are your writing strengths?
Figurative language my beloved… I mold and bend works like clay to my will and abuse them for the sake of art. I sometimes place words that have no correlation besides each other but with their surrounding pears have all the meaning of everything I mean for them to say. My teachers all throughout school loved and hated my writing all the same but i always counted it as one of my strengths.
What are your writing weaknesses?
That I get distracted in words and go off on off topic tangents. I always do this and I have to stop myself. And like I’ve said before this just end up a old tangled yarn ball of metaphors that in another persons hands, the knots are yanked at and pulled so impossibly there’s no chance to get it undone. But in mine, the twist and turns of yarn become limp and fall so incredibly loose between my fingers. So I want to make my writing able to be untangle without too much of a yank or tug.
What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?
I’ve done it myself with Raphael Santiago from Mortal instruments in Spanish and Small dialogue bits I’m okay with. But if it’s like a full speech I’m not too keen on it even if I understand the language.
What was the first fandom you wrote for?
Wait funny story real quick, I recently found my old notebook I used to write fanfiction in when I was like 8 and it’s atrocious. But if I remember correctly the first fanfic in their is with Magi (another anime and manga series very dear to my heart) but if i’m correct the first piece of actual fanfic I wrote was a bit earlier and it was Pandora Hearts maybe? Or even around the time that shows like Avatar and Teen Titans aired…
What’s your favorite fic you’ve written?
I have to go with “The Ingenuous” mostly because I remember many years ago thinking those two would be good friends but completely abandoned the idea because it was like 2015 and I thought the fandom was dead… And also because these two don’t have a canon relationship I have taken free will with it and halfway through writing it I realized their relationship has elements of practically me and one of my friends I’ve known my whole life. And that person is very near and dear to me and I’ve always held them close to my heart… So really that fic just has everything of me and I’ve given my all into that fic.
I’m tagging
@zoingfandom and @ohanahoku-ao3 and thats It because I feel awkward tagging other people I know are Ao3 writers XD
Zoing & Ohana please save me from my awkwardness and tag more people please, I beg of you. But also Anyone else if free to join in!
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