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millieswickedbooks · 5 years

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the somewhat tragic story of georgie’s savior - chapter three

CHAPTER THREE: bowers, burgers and b-what in the actual fuck is happening?

(3/?)

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pairing: Loser’s Club x black!OC (platonic), Pennywise x black!OC (NOT ROMANTIC AT ALL)

WARNINGS: PENNYWISE, the Bowers’ gang, racism, racial slurs, LGBT+ related slurs, sexual harassment, harassment, bullying, DESCRIPTIVE CHILD ABUSE, bruises, wounds, blood, puke, some disgusting food description, snakes, chase scene, nightmares, swearing

word count: 7,955

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EXTENDED WARNING:

THIS CHAPTER WILL HAVE A SCENE THAT DESCRIBES CHILD ABUSE

SLIGHT SPOILER: IT WILL BEGIN WHEN JORDYN GETS HOME

!!! PLEASE READ WITH CAUTION !!!

~~~~~

☹

Previously:

After taking a peek into her mind, and saw it as a gold mine of fears. Behind the ‘brave’ act this girl put up was a messed up, scared little girl. What if making her even more scared, made her taste even better? IT laughed, knowing that he would have a lot of fun with her. She had no idea that that summer, which was rapidly approaching, would be a memorable yet harrowing one.

☹

Eight months later…

THE BELL HAD JUST RUNG meaning that Hell would let its tortured souls have a three-month break. That’s right; school is out. Summer has officially begun and the halls are now flooded with hundreds of loud and excited teenagers, who have been waiting for this day since the first day of school. One of those hundreds people being Jordyn.

Jordyn sighed as she walked through the crowded and loud hall, immediately getting irritated with the fact that she has only been out in the hall for five seconds and she has already bumped into six people. She never used her locker throughout the school year so she was able to skip that hassle walk right to the doors.

She walked out and felt the sun on her skin, and she sort of basked in it. She sighed and remembered that today, she would be babysitting Bill. She scanned the yard full of kids, searching for him and his friends, which she knew he would be with. After walking a bit, she managed to find Bill and she made her way over to him. And she was correct, he was accompanied by Stan, Richie, and Eddie. They were standing near the trash can, their bags empty and in the middle of a conversation so they didn’t notice her coming towards them.

“Is that how you wanna spend your summer?” Jordyn heard Eddie ask, who was looking at Richie. “Inside an arcade?” She remembered Richie talking about this new game he wanted to beat really badly. What was it called again? Oh. Street Fighter!

Jordyn wasn’t a big fan of video games but she listened to Richie talk on and on about them because she knew he was very passionate about them and she simply amazed at how much he liked them.

“Beats spending it inside your mother, oooh!” Richie quickly retorted and he lifted his hand up to accept a high-five from Stan, to which the unamused Stan quickly rejected by grabbing Richie’s arm and bringing it down. Jordyn rolled her eyes at Richie’s comment, silently laughing on the inside but she would never admit that.

“What if we go to the Quarry?” Stan suggested.

“G-guys, we were g-going to th-the woods tomorrow, r-rem-remember?” Bill said. The boys nodded, remembering that they promised Bill they would join him in the hunt to find the animal that attacked Georgie. It was silent for a moment and at that very moment, Jordyn had finally reached the boys, who still hadn’t noticed her.

“Hey guys,” she announced herself, causing all four of the boys to turn and look at her. They all smiled when they realized it was Jordyn.

“Hey, J-Jordyn,” Bill said, happy to see his brother’s savior. Ever since she had saved Georgie and been babysitting him and Georgie, he had grown very fond of the girl. Despite the fact that he hated the idea of having a babysitter at his age, he couldn’t hate Jordyn. He loved having her around, she made him feel as if he had a friend over instead of babysitting him and his brother.

Jordyn smiled at him and then at the other three boys, who, in return, murmured ‘hi’ s, and she wondered why they were acting so off. She soon realized that Eddie, Richie, Stan, and now Bill, were staring at her body. She blushed, tucking a strand of her curly hair behind her hair, feeling slightly self-conscious.

Today, she decided to actually clean up a little bit, make herself more presentable. She was wearing a white crop top that showed off her stomach and a light blue denim jacket. She paired it with a light blue denim mini-skirt that complimented her long, dark legs and a pair of black converse. In the boys’ eyes, the top… really— really— complimented her chest.

Eddie was slightly blushing at being caught staring there while Stan’s eyes were definitely checking out her legs. Bill’s eyes were wide, just taking her appearance and Richie just whistled. The boys, deep down, were still shocked that after all this time, a cute sophomore like Jordyn would even hang out with them. To them, Jordyn was absolutely gorgeous, and the fact that she had such a big heart and saved Georgie, only augmented her looks. Richie was the first to speak up about her attire.

“Damn, Jordyn! Remind me why do you hide that hot bod every day again?” Richie joked, winking at her. Jordyn just rolled her eyes at him, smiling slightly, ignoring his comment.

“Got any plans for later on today?” She asked, knowing that she would stick with them for the entire afternoon until the curfew, because of babysitting duties and whatnot.

“Nothing really but tomorrow we will be taking a nice trip down to the forest for our regularly scheduled hunt–!” Richie started to explain but he never finished because he was abruptly interrupted by Eddie.

“Beep beep Richie!” Stan quickly told him but it was too late. They all stared at Jordyn, knowing what she was about to say.

They knew she would end up going with them tomorrow because she would have to watch Bill, but they knew Jordyn was super against hunting for the animal that attacked her and Georgie.

She never really talked about what happened that day in full detail, even though just about everyone knew she could recite the whole thing as if it happened yesterday. The four boys knew the whole ordeal was mostly likely traumatizing all together, so they never mentioned the hunting in front of her. They watched as Jordyn’s face went from confused and curious to conflicted in a matter of seconds and they all felt bad, thinking they had reopened old wounds for her.

She knew Bill was almost hell-bent on catching this ‘animal’ he thought attacked Georgie and it worried her. He told her that she had inspired him, he wanted to save other people like she did with Georgie. But he wanted a bigger impact, he wanted to stop animal altogether so the kids wouldn’t stop going missing by the dozens like they were at the moment. He wanted to catch the animal so they could live in Derry in peace. Jordyn tried to change his mind and warn him as much as possible how fucking dangerous that shit was but Bill is stubborn as hell.

She worried that whatever the thing she saw in the sewer or at the hospital would end up getting him or one of his friends and she would be at fault, it’s her lie. It would cost them their life.

The clown-thing eyes flashed in her mind and she shuddered.

“Are you guys seriously going after that animal?” Jordyn asked, knowing very well that she would not like the answer to her question. The boys nodded slowly and she sighed, knowing she wouldn’t be able to convince them not to. “Ugh, you guys are so infuriating. But there’s nothing I can do. Make sure you all have weapons and calamine.”

The boys felt relieved at her reaction and a smile was plastered on Bill’s face. He was happy to have Jordyn on board.

“Guys, look…” Eddie said, looking off to the side. “Betty Ripsom’s mom.” They all turned in the direction where he was looking and Jordyn saw a distressed pale, white lady in a light green dress. Her hair was dark and curly and she had tears brimming her eyes as she frantically looked for any sign of her missing daughter, like as if the girl would be here.

The sight made Jordyn’s heart feel like it was breaking. She felt for the woman, the loss of a child must be… unbearable. And right behind the mother was two police officers, one being Henry Bowers’ father.

She got shivers down her spine as she made eye contact with the man. He glared at her, his eyes trying to project how much he hated the girl. She quickly looked away, turning back to the group.

“Is she really expecting to see her coming out of school?” Stan asked, confused by Betty’s mother’s actions.

“Stan, the lady is desperate. Just look at her… imagine being in her shoes. I’d be looking just about anywhere too if I was her,” Jordyn explained, trying to get Stanley to understand. The boy nodded at her, now getting why the lady was acting so weird.

“But still, it’s not like Betty Ripsom has been hiding in HomeEc for the last three weeks,” Eddie said, still not getting why the mother choose probably the least likely place to search for her missing daughter.

“Do you think they’ll actually find her?” Stan asked genuinely and Jordyn wanted to nod and be optimistic but something deep down told her “absolutely not” .

“Sure,” Richie replied. “In a ditch, all decomposed, covered in worms and maggots, smelling like Eddie’s mom’s underwear,” he finished, trying to lighten the mood, in such a bad way. Jordyn grimaced at the joke and at the godforsaken image that just came to life in her mind.

“Shut up, that’s fricking disgusting…” Eddie retaliated, making a face at Richie’s inappropriate comment.

“Okay, enough talk about missing kids,” Jordyn broke in, not wanting to talk about the topic anymore since it increased the guilt she held within her. “It’s totally killing my summer vibe right now. Since you guys aren’t going anywhere right now, how about burgers? On me?”

“On y-you?” Bill asked, knowing that that would be a lot of money.

“Yeah, your dad paid me extra because I successfully taught Georgie how to divide, I did all your chores, and I cleaned the bathroom,” Jordyn recounted. “Annddd I found $20 on my way to lunch today!” She happily finished, pulling the $20 out of her pocket, to show the boy she wasn’t lying.

The boys looked shocked and smiled at her, all happy about going out to eat. As she tried to put the bill back in her pocket, it slipped from her hands and fell to the ground… next to a $10 bill! Damn, this day got eighty times better.

“Holy shit, a $10 bill! Now we’re getting dessert! Let’s go and actually talk about how tomorrow is gonna go down. Just because I’m allowing you to go doesn’t mean we’re gonna go in all willy-nilly and fuck around in the woods,” Jordyn informed the boys in what she liked to call her ‘Mom Voice’, as she shoved the cash into her pocket and turned around to begin walking away from the school.

Stan, Bill, Richie, and Eddie stood there, still shocked that she just found more money but they soon began to walk with her. Bill and Eddie sped up to walk in front of Jordyn, while Richie and Stan stayed behind her.

“I’m glad Jordyn’s actually coming with us for once. You know, Jordyn, the forest isn’t that bad. There’s nothing better than having your shoes smell like lake water and having a poison ivy rash on your ankles and knees,” Richie joked, nudging her shoulder.

“Poison ivy is my favorite!” Jordyn sarcastically confessed, joining in on the joke almost at once. “Thank God I was actually invited this time, it’s been my lifelong dream to rub poison ivy on every inch of my hot bod while you guys watch me.”

Jordyn never really thought herself to be a hilarious person like Richie but she knew she could be funny at times, so she felt kind of embarrassed when she expected to hear a couple of laughs or another joke in response from Richie but she heard none of that. Instead, all she heard was a couple of grunts and the sound of a body hitting the ground.

She turned around to see what happened and saw that Richie and Stan were currently on the floor and in front of her, and quite close to her might she add, was the one and only Demon Bowers. And he was smirking evilly at her.

She didn’t have any time to react to his presence because she was quickly shoved to the side by him and she stumbled into someone’s arms. A pair of lanky arms. She looked around and saw Henry standing in front of Richie and Stan’s fallen bodies, behind Eddie and Bill, who had just turned around after hearing the commotion, Belch was behind Eddie and Victor standing near Stan’s head. Meaning that there’s only one answer to who was holding her. Jordyn tensed up as the arms wrapped tighter around her waist, bringing her closer to his body.

“You wanted to rub what exactly all over your hot bod?” Patrick asked, his menacing smirk making her feel dirty all over.

“Get off of me–” Jordyn spit out but Patrick interrupted her, his hot breath making her gag.

“I have a couple of ideas in mind of what you can do to that hot body. All of them involving me,” He suggested disgustingly, leaning down to smell her conditioned curly hair and her perfume. His pupils were blown wide with lust as he stared at her. Jordyn struggled against his hold but his grip became painful and she had to stop, a whimper of pain escaping her throat.

Stan, Richie, Eddie, and Bill were all watching them from their own various troubling positions and they all felt sick to their stomachs at Patrick’s comments. Richie on the other hand, felt as if he couldn’t just stand there and watch that happen. Bowers and his dickheads could harass him and his friends all they wanted but he drew the line at Jordyn. He went to stand up but Bowers pushed him back down.

“Don’t even try it,” Henry warned him, somehow making Richie hate him even more. Beside them, Victor saw Stan trying to reach for his fallen kippah and he quickly grabbed it, waving it out of reach for the Jewish boy.

“Give that back!” Stan pleaded angrily, looking irritated as he tried to reach for it from the ground but, no, Victor was just having too much fun. Of course he wasn’t going to give that stupid hat back to that stupid kid.

“No, I’d much rather play frisbee,” Victor commented bluntly, giving Stan a rude look as he flung the kippah onto the moving bus that just drove down the road and past them.

‘What a fucking dick,’ Jordyn thought. The blond boy was probably proud of himself as he walked away, smirking his whole way towards the parking lot.

Belch then decided it was his time to shine as he burped right into Eddie’s face, causing the boy to gag. Jordyn tried to get out of Patrick’s grip once again, feeling the need to defend the younger boys swell in her chest.

Bill watched as she failed once again. He too was disgusted at how Patrick was acting towards Jordyn and he was about to go do something when Henry began to walk away from the group, bumping roughly into Bill’s shoulder to get past him.

Patrick got to pinch Jordyn’s arm, causing her to yelp, and inhaled her scent before letting her go, following Henry and Belch. Jordyn shivered as the tall boy winked at her while checking her out and licking his lips. She now regretted putting on the outfit.

Bill was fed up. And he was about to say something. While Richie helped Stan get up behind them, Bill spoke up.

“Y-you s-s-s-su-su-suck, Bowers!”

“Shut up, Billy!” Eddie frantically blurted out, not wanting any more trouble with the rather terrifying older boys. Yet the three boys turned around upon hearing the stuttering boy’s insult, all three of them actually surprise the boy had the balls to stand up to them, but they made sure not to show it on their faces.

“Y-you s-s-suh-suh-say something? B-B-B-Buh-Buh-Billy?” Henry falsely-stuttered out, mocking Bill’s disorder. Belch and Patrick both found this highly amusing, both of them laughing. This angered Jordyn to end. She wanted to rip a chunk of the boy’s ugly, greasy ass mullet out his mostly likely dandruff-and-lice-infected scalp. He continued his taunting.

“You,” and then he turned towards Jordyn, “and you, got free rides because of Stuttering Billy’s brother. You guys had so much attention on yourselves, if anyone laid a hand on any of you, especially you, Miss Savior of Derry, the town would riot. But guess what,” As Henry got closer to Bill, Jordyn was subconsciously getting closer too. She didn’t like where this was going. “Free rides over.”

Henry had taken another step closer to Bill and Jordyn had finally decided enough was enough. In a quick movement, Jordyn stood in front of Bill, shoving Henry back. He stumbled back a little bit and it took a while to process what just happened. Once he realized what had happened, he moved forward, his hand raised in a fist, aiming at Jordyn. Richie and Bill went to grab Jordyn, to move her out of the way of Henry’s wrath. But before the hit could land, Jordyn called out.

“Your father’s right there!” She had no idea why she felt the need to say that but it obviously worked since that triggered something in the mullet boy, making him freeze.

Silence fell over the two groups. Patrick and Belch looked at Jordyn, in shock and waiting, not knowing what to expect was going to happen next. Meanwhile, Eddie, Richie, Stan and Bill were confused as to what Jordyn was planning, yet they knew whatever she was doing was working. Henry looked over at his father and something like fear flashed before his eyes. She continued. “I wonder how he would feel about you putting your hands on the oldest Denbrough’s son. At school. Where everyone was watching.”

Henry looked torn. He didn’t know how Jordyn had figured his fear of his father but he wanted to kill her for it. But he knew she was right, there would be hell to pay at home if he did anything to them out here in here in open. The boy huffed angrily.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” the boy tried to quickly cover up and Jordyn almost smiled. “But I sure do know that he would love to watch me beat you to a pulp. He might care for those f*rries but not for you, n*gger. This summer is gonna be a hurt train, for you and your f*ggot friends. Don’t think that hanging out with them will save you. Watch your back.”

And with that, the three bullies walked away, going towards their car and speeding off down the road, most likely on their way to find a new victim to harass and assault.

Jordyn, Eddie, Bill, Richie, and Stan stood there, subconsciously huddling together as they watched their tormentors drive off and then everyone kind of let out a breath they didn’t know they were holding in.

“I wish he’d go missing,” Richie spoke up from her left and Jordyn sighed, feeling the same way.

“Yeah, so does every child in this fucking town,” she commented, rolling her eyes as she adjusted herself, feeling appetite vanish after dealing with Patrick’s grubby hands. She absolutely despised the boy.

“He’s probably the one doing it,” Eddie claimed, looking at the group and Jordyn shook her head, knowing that his dumbass wouldn’t be able to hide all those bodies.

“Whatever, let’s go, I’m starving,” Jordyn murmured, knowing the boys could hear her and began to walk away from the scene. Even though she lied to them, she hoped maybe smelling the food or seeing it would reawaken the dead appetite within her. She didn’t need to look back to know her boys were following behind, them not wanting to be there anymore either, thanks to Bowers.

☹

They stopped at Georgie’s elementary school before going out to eat, picking up Georgie who was waiting for them. His face lit up when he caught sight of Jordyn and her friends. His happiness brought joy to her heart. He ran over and hugged her tightly and took her hand as they began to walk away from the school. She didn’t think the boy could get any happier but then she told him that they were going out to eat and it was like watching a ball of energy burst into flames.

Once the group got to the diner, everything was fine. Like Jordyn had hoped, the sight of food brought the joy back into the group that had been snatched away and stomped on by the Bowers and his minions.

They all ate burgers and drank their milkshakes happily, cracking jokes here and there, laughing loudly and enjoying each others company.

They were so distracted enjoying each other’s company that no one saw the red balloon just outside the window a few feet behind them.

☹

After hanging out with her boys for a while around town—thank god it was Bowers-free—and then dropping Richie, Stan and Eddie off at their homes, Jordyn had gone with Bill and Georgie to their house. She wanted to hang out at the Denbrough’s house for a bit until the curfew came around, which was usually when Mr. and Mrs. Denbrough came home and when she was able to go home. She hugged Bill, kissed Georgie’s forehead and bid the family adieu as she made her way home.

When Jordyn had gotten home, she didn’t like the feeling of dread that filled her stomach, making it feel heavier than it already was with the burger she had eaten earlier. Had she done something wrong? Curfew didn’t start until a couple of minutes from now…

She shook her head, walking up her porch and into her house, quietly shutting the door behind her. The room was dark so she had to be careful so she wouldn’t bump into anything. But what she wasn’t expecting was the loud voice of her father screeching at her.

“Where the FUCK have you been?!” Isaiah roared out in anger at his daughter, which caused Jordyn to flinch so hard, she fell backwards in utter shock and fear, bumping into something on the way down. The sound of something crashing and breaking accompanies the light being turned on, finally allowing Jordyn to see.

And the sight caused her muscles to contract in fear. Her father was standing a couple of feet away, seething with rage. She turned to see what she had bumped into and she felt her heart drop. She had accidentally bumped into the end table, which knocked the picture of her father and her mother hugging and smiling at the camera over. The glass was cracked and some parts of it even fell out, glass all haphazardly splayed all over the ground beside the end table. Also, the golden frame was broken, which was a frame that Mama had gotten custom-made for that picture.

Jordyn looked over and saw her father looking over at the broken picture and she closed her eyes, trying to prepare herself for what was about to happen as the fear settled deep within her gut.

“Jordyn, Jordyn, Jordyn…” Isaiah started in a low voice and Jordyn cringed, knowing exactly what she was in for. ”First you come home late, nearly past curfew might I add and now… you… you fucking broke your mother’s frame? Is that correct? Because if it isn't, please correct me.”

“Dad–” Jordyn began, trying to get her apology out, knowing that explaining she hadn’t meant to break it wouldn’t work with him. But Isaiah was not having any of it.

“DID I SAY YOU COULD SPEAK?! HUH?! DID I SAY THAT, LIL’ BITCH?!” Isaiah bellowed at her, running at her and grabbing her forcefully by her biceps. He had a bruising grip on her arms as he shook her violently. Jordyn brought her forearms up, her hands feebly in front of her face as a way to protect her in some way. She was cowering, turning her face away from Isaiah’s mouth, not wanting to feel the brute intensity of hate that was coming out of her father’s mouth head-on.

“Dad, I did'n–” She tried to explain, looking forward at her father, deciding to abandon the ‘just take the blame and apologize’ route. She wanted to get away from him as fast as possible. But Isaiah cut her off once again, this time he brought his hand down on her face, slapping her hard.

Jordyn didn’t feel the slap at first—since he hit her that hard—she just suddenly realized she wasn’t looking at him anymore. After a couple of seconds of Jordyn blinking, trying to focus her blurry eyesight, she felt her cheek get warm as the blood rushed to the spot he had hit. The stinging sensation was very much present there in the cheek as she heard her father bellow at her once again.

“SHUT YOUR FUCKING MOUTH! I bet you were out there with those little white boys doing God knows fucking what. Is that why you’re always late, you fucking slut?” Isaiah accused and Jordyn shook her head, tears rapidly falling down her cheeks. “Because you’re letting those boys use you and when one is done with you, they pass you on to the other one? Is that what you do out there, get passed around like some fucking sex doll all fucking day?!”

“No Dad, they’re just my friends! I swear!”

“You lying fucking bitch… and after all that sinning you doin’, you have the audacity to come show your face here and you barely get here and you’re already fucking this place up like you do with every-fucking-thing!” Isaiah screamed right into Jordyn’s face, spit landing on her cheek and chin. She cringed again and tried to get out his painful grip but he wasn’t letting up. “You ruin everything, you hear me?! EVERYTHING! You ruined your body, you ruined your mother, you ruined our marriage, you ruin everything!”

Isaiah punched Jordyn in the jaw, causing her to fall back just by the sheer force of the punch. Isaiah was a large man, he was 6’4 and one-hundred-ninety-one pounds of pure muscle. Jordyn, on the other hand, was 5’3 and weighed one-hundred-eight pounds. And she certainly didn’t work out.

From her position on the ground, Jordyn saw her father raise his leg and she winced, as she laid there as the man repeatedly kicked her stomach.

Unbeknownst to the father and the child, a pair of glowing yellow eyes watched from the corners of the room. IT stood there, watching the father as he grabbed the girl’s hair and drag her as she screamed and cried out in pain. He had a huge smirk on his face as he watched the abuse unfold right before his very eyes.

‘Interesting…’ He thought to himself as he sniffed the air, the fear and pain in the air caused him to let out a groan in satisfaction. ‘This is good.’

☹

Jordyn sat in the bathroom, dabbing the small and scattered wounds on her right shoulder and arm with warm water. At some point during the beating, Isaiah pushed her and she fell out the glass from the broken picture frame.

After she pulled several pieces of glass out, she rinsed the cuts with mild soap and warm water and was now trying to get the bleeding to stop by applying pressure over several areas at the same time. It was working but slowly.

Jordyn sighed as she looked at the bruise on her jaw in the mirror and she rolled her eyes, already trying to come up with her excuse. She sighed and painfully stood up, her ribs protesting highly at the movement.

She didn’t need to lift her shirt up to know that there was a bruise there but she did anyway. And ‘lo and behold, thereupon her brown skin, was an enormous bruise from Isaiah’s kicks. While flashbacks played in her head of her father’s abuse, Jordyn shivered in fear.

The feeling of tears rolling down her cheeks is what snapped her out of her trance.

Jordyn stared at herself as she watched the tears that were falling down her face. She felt something stirring deep within her and she couldn’t understand it at first. But she soon recognized it was anger. She was angry, so angry she could feel her hands shaking, her jaw clenching and her chest, neck, and ears getting warm with the flush that was creeping up to them. The longer she stared, the angrier she got. Angry with herself. For allowing her father to make her cry. She knew he couldn’t exactly see her but this to her, still felt he was winning in a sick way.

“Stop,” Jordyn told herself in a shaky voice as she kept glaring at herself in the mirror, irately wiping the tears away. “Stop fucking crying.”

Another tear slipped out and Jordyn swiftly wiped it away just like had done with the others. She shook her head and took a deep breath, pushing her sadness deep down her like she always did after these things. She bottled it all up, not wanting to deal with her… issues or feelings afterwards.

Jordyn decided to distract herself by fixing her hair for sleep since she was already in the bathroom. She dampened her hair and proceeded to use a comb to detangle it with some Detangle Aid!—she always used to see her mom use it for her hair and Jordyn was fascinated by her mother’s lacquered, kinky hair, so she would always buy it for herself.

After successfully detangling her hair, she parted into sections and beginning to do four dutch braids.

With aching arms muscles—and aching everywhere else—and now sporting four neat and firm dutch braids on her head—she does this nearly every night, it would be shocking if she wasn’t a pro at braiding��Jordyn silently walked out of the bathroom. She tip-toed to the kitchen downstairs, not wanting to wake her father and have to endure what she just went through once again. Once was already way more than enough.

She grabbed the frozen peas from the freezer and made her way upstairs to her room, stopping in the hallway closet to get a small towel as well.

Once she was inside her room, Jordyn gently closed the door behind her and sighed, as she changed out of her clothes carefully, not wanting to irritate her ribs further. She threw on a light gray top and some black plaid pajama shorts and turned on her fan and walked over to her bed and carefully tucked herself in.

Once she was comfortable—well, as comfortable as one could after what just happened to her—under her warm and heavy comforter, Jordyn laid the peas on the towel and put it on her stomach, the weight of the peas on her tender bruise hurt, producing a gasp of pain from her. But the coldness sent shivers down her spine. She knew by morning the peas would be melted and would’ve soaked her shirt so that's why she got the towel.

Jordyn was very exhausted so it didn’t take her long to fall asleep, which she did happily, she was tired of many things, like tired of being awake. She was tired of living in this house, tired of dealing with her father’s anger issues, tired of missing her mother, tired of dealing with Bowers and his goons, tired of this childhood she was forced to live in. She was tired of Derry.

She was tired of living.

So Jordyn closed her eyes, letting all the tiredness drift her off into unconsciousness, praying that whoever was above would have some mercy on her soul and grant her wish of not waking up the next morning.

Not so surprisingly, Jordyn wasn’t lying about being tired at all, because she was so tired, she didn’t even see the red balloon just outside of her window.

☹

The smell of syrupy pancakes and eggs almost immediately woke Jordyn up. She sat up in her bed, rubbing the sleep out of her eyes and saw that it was morning already, so she should probably get ready to go hunting with Bill and others soon.

But after getting another waft of that delicious food, she couldn’t even stop herself from getting up and out of bed and walking to the kitchen. When she got downstairs she froze at the sight. Her father was wearing an apron and cooking. Something that he doesn’t do—well not anymore, since her mother went missing.

Jordyn felt uneasy suddenly, not understanding what was going on but what she does understand is everything in her body screaming her to GET AWAY but she doesn't understand why it's telling her that. It all seems so nice though. It was just like old times, when her Mom was still there.

“Hi, sweetheart, you sleep well?” Isaiah asked as he continued to cook the eggs on the hot pan. He didn’t need to look at her for her to hear the smile in his voice, the smile she missed seeing so deeply—he doesn’t do it anymore.

“Yeah, I did, Isa–Dad,” Jordyn corrected herself as she looked at her father, cooking just like old times. She couldn’t stop the smile from appearing on her face if she wanted to.

“Why don’t you sit down and wait for breakfast, yeah? I’m almost done,” Her father told her and Jordyn scrunched her eyebrows in confusion; he hasn’t turned to look at her, how can he see that she is standing? Her father spoke up once again. “I said sit down.”

His voice made her hair stand on end as she was taken back to times she didn’t want to remember. She quickly sat down at the table to upset him any further.

As she sat there, she heard a noise from her right and she looked over, seeing… something… scurry out of sight into a rather large hole in their dining room. Since when were there holes or animals in their house? She heard something else make some noise from her left and she turned to look and she couldn’t explain what she saw before it ran off. It was long, slimy-looking, bleeding and… decaying. Jordyn could see the stain it left behind from its slimy skin—actually everything it had touched was turning a blotchy gray-black color. It was spreading throughout the room.

‘Wait…’ Jordyn thought to herself as she soon realized that everything was too bright and… saturated. It was starting to give her a headache.

“Dad… do we have animals in the house?” Jordyn found herself asking as she rubbed her eyes, trying to have her eyes adjust to the unusual brightness.

“Yeah, I bought something earlier today, decided you would totally want to see it,” Her father informed her as his whole body twitched, his eyes never leaving the now burning food in front of him. Jordyn still hadn’t seen his face yet.

“Dad, why is it loose in the house? What is it?” Jordyn questioned her father further, eyes wide as the rot neared the kitchen further and further. It had absorbed just about everything but the room they were currently in but it was getting there steadily.

Jordyn watched as chunks of their decayed house began to fall apart from behind her. She tried to get up but she found rope wrapped around her arms, legs, and torso, holding her down and not letting her get up from her chair. She felt her breath become more rapid and she struggled to get out, everything becoming too scary and confusing for her to handle.

She heard the creature scurrying around once again and she flinched at the sound—it was getting closer.

“Don’t worry about that, how’s your food, darling?” Her father asked her and she looked down in front of her and saw what her father had cooked. She gagged at the sight.

It was a huge plate of what Jordyn could only make out as puke and undigested food. And it had fucking giant maggots wiggling around in it. There was hair, bloody toenails, mold, bloody eyeballs, and what looked like octopus legs all wiggling around on the plate, causing everything to make a wet, squelch-y noise. And not to mention that all over were just-hatched baby chicks and they were squealing and squawking loudly and painfully, but that all ended when blood suddenly came pouring out of their tiny eyes and mouths. The birds, now dead, slouched forward and their blood began to mix into the rest of the disgusting mush on the plate.

And to top it off, it smelled like straight horse-shit and it was making Jordyn was gagging so hard that her throat hurt.

“Dad…” She managed to spit out in a whimper but her father cut her off.

“JORDYN!” He roared out and Jordyn flinched, trying to hide but she was still tied to the chair. The rope was now painfully tighter and Jordyn could feel her skin nearly splitting from how tight it was now. She let out a whine of pain as the room suddenly got dark. The decay had reached them, it had engulfed the whole house, everything, absolutely everything.

Jordyn heard her father breathing heavy and she looked over to see him looking right at her. And she couldn’t believe what she was looking at.

Her father’s eyes were black. Like all black. Like ‘demonic possession’ black. And he has these red lines painted on his face, coming out of the corners of his mouth and going up to his eyes, over them and just a couple inches above his eyebrows.

‘Where have I seen that before?’ Jordyn thought to herself, her eyebrows scrunching up in confusion as she looked at her father with wide, scared eyes. But before Jordyn could think further, her father spoke up once again, but it was different this time. Jordyn didn’t know what exactly was happening but she could hear his voice as it neared the end of his sentence. It became all distorted and weird, his voice becoming something else… something so familiar.

Jordyn gasped as she slowly began to figure out who was standing before her, and it wasn’t her father like she had thought it was. Was it that fucking thing from the sewers?

“You have been causing such a ruckus out of this stupid pet thing, you haven’t even said hi to your mother who has been sitting beside you this entire time, now go on, say hi Jojo-Bear,” Not-father told her as his face began to warp and… melt?

‘Mom?’ Jordyn thought to herself. She wanted to turn and look but everything in her told her not to.

‘It’s fucking a trick,’ she thought to herself. ‘The clown is doing this to you, so wake up! It’s a fucking dream!’

“Jordyn…” She heard from beside her and she gasped at the sound of her mother’s voice, so clear and so close to her. Was she really there? Jordyn, after fighting with herself, sucked in a breath and turned around and she immediately regretted it.

Beside Jordyn was her mother, so the thing was not lying but it was different. Her eyes were gouged out with blood spilling out of the holes in her head and her skin was decomposed, her skin blue and gray and her mouth black like tar.

“ WAKE UP! ” Her mother screeched out, her voice loud and powerful, like a sonic boom that gave Jordyn a sense of control of this situation. Her mouth was opened and Jordyn could see the creature that was crawling around the house in there, just sitting in her mother’s mouth and threatening her with its glowing yellow eyes.

But Jordyn knew better. This isn’t real.

And just as the creature jumped out to attack her, Jordyn closed her eyes and simply told herself; ‘Wake up.’

And she did. But not it was not where she expected.

☹

Jordyn gasped as she sat up, not feeling her comfortable bed under her body. She was covered in a cold sweat as she looked around and realized that she, in fact, wasn’t in bed, or her room, or even her house. She was outside, literally. She was laying in the middle of the road and it was dark. She looked down and saw the pajamas she had put on before she went to bed and she had a throbbing pain all over her body.

‘My bruises…’ She thought to herself as she carefully stood up, looking around to see where she was and to figure out exactly how she got there.

‘Did I sleepwalk? I must’ve. There’s no other way I would’ve gotten here if it wasn’t that… That’s weird though. I’ve never sleepwalked before…’ Jordyn thought to herself as she rubbed her arms up and down her bare arms. Couldn’t she have grabbed a coat first before she sleepwalked all the way out here?

While she was looking around she saw a house that she realized looked familiar and she felt grateful to at least be in Derry. She walked over to a street sign, one she had to get closer to read since the darkness was shrouding it almost completely. Once she was close enough, she read the words; ‘Jackson St.’ and she couldn’t stop the gasp that she let out.

She was in fucking Jackson Street? That was at least a good mile from her house. She looked to her left and saw the dreaded sewer opening from eight fucking months ago. The one where that clown thing came out of and snatched Georgie’s arm clean off. She took a couple of steps back from it but it was hard because of this darkness…

Then suddenly, the darkness surrounding her made her hair stand on edge as she realized two things; One, she was out past curfew. If the cops caught her, she would be so ridiculously fucked. Two, the sound of giggling coming from the—the fucking sewer, of fucking course—a couple of feet behind in front of her made her realizeshe wasn’t alone.

Jordyn didn’t even dare look into the sewer to see what was waiting for her. She knew it was that fucking clown. He got into her head and she knows it. Is IT the reason why she is out here? Was IT in her house?

“Jordyn…” His voice completely derailed her anxious thinking. His voice alone sent shivers down her spine. He wasn’t done tormenting her. She was frozen with fear.

“Little baby Jo is scared of the dark isn’t she? Don’t know what could be hiding in there right?” IT commented, his voice now behind her and she didn’t hesitate to book it the fuck out of there, her legs finally deciding to be useful at the moment. She was running as fast as fucking possible in the direction of her house but she had a wholemile left—all she did in Track was the one-hundred meter.

“Im’ma coming Jojie, you can’t escape me!” IT taunted her, and she couldn’t stop the tears from pouring out of her eyes as she ran. When will IT leave her alone… She didn’t think she could continue on like this forever. Despite how fast she was going, the cold air roaring in her ears.

“Stay here and play Jo! You wanna go back home? You wanna go to the house where your father beats you?” IT jibed at her and Jordyn was so shocked at the fact that that thing was in her house she tripped, falling onto the ground hard. “You know you don’t wanna go there, so come with me, where we all float!”

Jordyn tried getting up but she was so out of breath, she thought she would pass out before she could do anything, let alone get up from the ground. She looked down to see what she tripped over and couldn’t even believe what she was looking at.

She had tripped over a turtle.

Like a real-life turtle. Like a living, breathing turtle. A reptile. Literally just standing on the road.

And it was staring at her. Like its’ beady little eyes were staring at her. And she knew it was looking at her because she could… feel it staring at her. Like as if this turtle was somehow staring right into her soul.

Jordyn felt as if she was malfunctioning. Given any other circumstance Jordyn probably would’ve laugh so hard at the weird situation she was in, she probably would’ve ended up crying and pissing herself at the same. But at the moment, Jordyn simply couldn’t wrap her mind around what was happening. Like she simply couldn’t understand the fact that a turtle that small caused her to fall and that she didn’t completely crush it with how recklessly she was running.

‘Running…?’ Jordyn thought to herself, wondering what she was doing before she got here when she remembered the fucking clown.

Jordyn quickly snapped out of the weird trance she was in when she remembered exactly why she was there. She stood up quickly as she looked around for anything, anything that gave away that IT was near but when she saw that the coast was clear, she booked it to her house.

She had already ran a considerable amount when the clown was chasing her so when her house came into view, she nearly collapsed with relief—which was something she never thought she would do since it is her house after all.

She bounded up the steps of her porch and quickly came in, happy that the door was left unlocked. She carefully ran up the steps of the stairs and locked herself in her bedroom.

Jordyn tried to stay up to maybe be able to defend herself if whatever the fuck that thing is came to torment her again but it was 3:47 a.m. and her exhaustion was winning. She convinced herself that IT went to go torment some other innocent child or hopefully get some rest—if whatever the fuck that is even needs it—and she drifted off into a dreamless sleep.

Little did know, right on her porch was the tiny turtle from earlier, standing in front of her house protectively.

The clown, on the other hand, was seething. That fucking turtle had decided to get off its’ lazy ass for once and do something, and completely ruined his plans for Jordyn tonight.

IT wouldn’t have really minded with any other random child but there was something about Jordyn that… IT needed. IT needed to have her. And now was when the turtle decided it would intervene. But he knew why. It’s because the turtle knows something about her, that something is what IT craves about her.

‘The turtle won’t always be there to protect her, ’ IT thought to himself as he slinked away into the shadows, his glowing yellow eyes looking at Jordyn’s house, taking in the decor of the house. It would be a place he would be spending a lot of time in so might as well memorize its features by heart. ‘And when he isn’t there… then she will be mine.’

☹

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shanellejw-blog · 7 years

Text

Growing Up As A Black Girl

Preschool to third grade were the best years growing up. I loved school, I loved my neighbors, and my friends. Growing up, I honestly didn’t even notice that people were “different” from me, regarding race. We were all just boys and girls who went to school and after, went home to our different mommies and daddies. It wasn’t until I got to fourth grade that things started to change. Fourth grade was just the beginning of me facing challenges to do with myself that I didn’t understand. It started with all my friends who were African American girls started to not like me. They isolated me and never hung out with me again because I was too “different” from them. They told me I wasn’t “black enough” to hang out with them. Overtime, I began to realize what was happening. They compared and contrasted me from themselves. In elementary school, my so called “friends” were regularly in trouble with teachers. They would talk back, get detention, or sometimes get suspended. When it came to grades, those girls were smart, but they would struggle in school. They didn’t get good grades in all subject areas. They were all also of dark skinned completion, while I am of lighter skin complexion. When I was that age, I never got in trouble. I was very smart at a young age and got really good grades in nearly everything. I was a teacher’s pet and I was very shy and quiet. I didn’t act the way the girls of darker skin thought I should, and because I just so happened to have a lighter skin complexion, they categorized me as white.

In their eyes, I was a black girl who wanted to be a white girl because I “acted” like a white girl. I was closer in skin to a white girl than they were, I never got in trouble, and was praised like the white girls by teachers - all because I was just being an ordinary student. At this time, this is when the “black girl wanna be white girl” or “white black girl” name calling started, which continued up until high school. Naturally, I readjusted and made new friends when I got to middle and high school. I didn’t choose friends off of what race they were; I chose friends who were in my classes and who I appealed to. Out of the girls, most of them were white and some were Hispanic. All my guy friends were either African American or Hispanic. I never thought twice about most of my friends being white because I never saw it as an issue - until I got to 7t h and 8t h grade, that is. I started to notice the difference between my friends and I that were never issues to me before. All my friends had hair that was super long, blonde/brown, and bone straight. My hair was black, thick, and naturally curly. I began to hate my hair and wish that I had hair like my friends. Because of this, I began straightening my hair excessively - multiple times throughout the day, to try to get it as straight as possible for as long as possible. It was too much for my hair to handle and it broke off immensely.

More things kept changing. I started to hate the summertime season. My friends’ favorite thing to do in the summer was to go tanning at the beach. My skin doesn’t tan in the sense that white people do. I don’t have tan lines to showcase my transition of color, I just roast. I wanted to have skin as close to skin complexion to my friends, (even though that isn’t possible because I am black), so I would always skip out on the beach because I didn’t want to get any darker than I already was. After my friends got done laying out in the sun, they’d put their skin up against mine to see if they had gotten as dark as me. They never did. I would wear sweatpants and hats in the summer to try to protect myself. Whenever I would come home from a long day of hanging out with my friends outside, the first thing I would do is ask my mom if I got any darker than when I had left. She’d either tell me “yes” or “no.” If she said no, I wouldn’t believe her, so I would wash my face two times in a row, in hopes I could wash the tan off. I even told my mom multiple times that when I got older, I was going to save up for skin lightening treatments. I never had a boyfriend and boys never showed interest in me when I was younger. Boys always did for my friends. I was convinced it was because they were white and I was black, so to me being black was equivalent to being ugly. Also, my friends would make comments that they didn’t realize was offensive or they thought it was okay to say it and laugh about it because I was their friend. They would say things like: “I’m supposed to be scared of you,” “you’re pretty for a black girl,” or “you aren’t like a normal black person.” I became very insecure. It was very unhealthy.

I hated being black; I hated it so much that I tried my best to “dismiss” my blackness and become blind to it. I used to say things to mom like, “why couldn’t you have had me with a white guy?” I had stopped watching movies and TV shows with black casts and I would only listen to music with white artists. This was hard to do, as I really loved R&B and rap music. I began to code switch, adapting to how white people talked. I used their jargon. I would spend extra time in the shower scrubbing my body in hopes that it would “lighten me up.” I have one brother and three sisters, but only one sister and I are of a lighter skin complexion. The rest are darker skin. I loved them, but I had convinced myself that my brother and other two sisters were ugly because they had darker skin. I began to think that all black people were ugly. The only African American woman that was pretty to me was my mother. I even remember telling myself that if my mom didn’t have light skin, she’d be ugly too.

Not only did I think being white would solve my physical problems, but I believe it’d solve my financial problems as well. My friends weren’t rich, but they were well-off. They had money to do whatever they wanted. They were all in dance classes, they would go to basketball summer camps, they all go on vacations every summer and winter break, they always had the newest iPhone whenever it came out, and they always went to super cool activities like concerts such as Kissmash bass. I didn’t have money like that. My mom was raising four kids on her own because my mother and father had divorced, and he wasn’t much help. I remember always having to skip out on fun activities like birthday parties. One year my friend went to Splash Lagoon for her birthday and everyone who went had to pay for their own. I couldn’t go because I couldn’t afford to. This was a tough time for me. It was hard because my friends didn’t know that I was going through this, and even if they did they wouldn’t have understood. My mom was hurting badly because of my insecurities, but she continued to try her best to make me feel my best. Sometimes I think that if my black friends never would’ve stopped being my friends in elementary, maybe I wouldn’t have had to go through what I did.

Thankfully, I no longer suffer with these insecurities. There are days when I feel down, but I always rise back up. I can’t tell you when exactly I began to realize how awesome it was to be black. I don’t know if it was a certain situation that put things in perspective for me or if it was something that I gradually overcame. I do know that my mother and my personal belief in God had a lot to do with it. I’m sharing this story because I know this is something that a lot of black girls and boys go through. It’s not easy. Everyone go goes through it differently and experiences different situations, but the pain is the same. Black people, brown people, - we all need to know that we are beautiful. We are awesome, creative, intelligent, and mesmerizing. Some of my influences that have helped me and still help me to this very day are Zendaya, Ryan Destiny, Kerry Washington, Tyler Perry, Shonda Rhimes, Tupac, Aaliyah, and Reyna Biddy. I share all of this in hopes that if this is something that you’re struggling with, take the time out and research any one of the names listed above. If this is something that you have already experienced and overcame, I am proud of you. I hope that you share this with someone else who needs it. Not only that, but since attending JCC, I’ve learned things about myself that I didn’t have answers to. I have Simone Sellstrom and David Kadanoff to thank for that after taking their courses. I could go way more in depth about what I’ve learned, how I’ve learned it, and what it’s taught me, but I would be here for typing another twelve pages, so on that note - I am so proud to be African American. I love who I am. I love everything that being black has to offer. Never do I wish that I could be of another race. And never again will I give up my rap and R&B music. Never forget, Black is excellence. -Shanelle Waller

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