#try at making a vocal synth project file myself. why did i do this. very fun! and a hell of my own creation

[bmpmp3]

crawls into the room haggard and covered in blood. you can make anything you want with vocal synthesizers.

you can make anything you want with vocal synthesizers.

midi by Maelstrom!

[maevefiction]

Your Light in the Mist - Chapter 6

I had said goodnight and closed the door on a still speechless Tom, then slid down the back of it and hit the floor with a gentle thud. I sat there like a rag doll, arms hanging loose at my sides, chin resting on my chest as my synapses fired like a fourth of July fireworks show gone awry. I felt like one of the Synths from HUMANS when their code went bad.

Half an hour went by before the world began to come into focus again, and I slowly began to take the vast amount of shit that required my attention into consideration. I rubbed my eyes with the heels of my hands.

“Am I insane? How the hell am I going to tie up all my loose ends and do two seminars in two days? What the fuck was I thinking?!?” My phone buzzed. I pulled it out of my bag…it was Tom. Right. That’s what I’d been thinking. I tapped the answer button.

“What can I do to you, Thomas?” I slapped my hand to my forehead when I realized what I’d said. Nothing like a classic Freudian slip to start off our very first phone conversation.

There was a moment of silence, then a sharp intake of breath that was deliciously tantalizing…which I desperately tried to ignore as I scrambled to recover.

“Whoops. Perhaps I should rephrase that. What can I do FOR you, Thomas?”

“I…I…” He cleared his throat. “Christ, Maude, are you trying to kill me? It took me all this time to cease picturing you strutting naked through your suite and regain enough of my composure to hit the call button.”

I grunted out a hmpf. “If it’s any consolation, I’m still sitting with my back against the room door. Because that happens to be where I landed when I slid down it after closing it in your face. Now my legs are asleep and I’m not quite sure how I’m going to get up.”

“Serves you right, you wicked temptress.” He laughed, then paused. “I know you��re ridiculously busy, but I…well, I suppose I just wanted to hear your voice again so I could reassure myself that this unimaginably marvelous day actually happened and I didn’t dream it all.”

I groaned. “Really, Hiddleston? How the fuck I am I supposed to top that? Anything I could conjure up would pale in comparison, so I’ll simply state that I understand and concur.”

“Good. Now, shall I pay you a visit and help you attain a more desirable position?” I didn’t need to see his face to know he was smirking.

“Thomas. Stahp. I have no time for a cold shower break.” He laughed.

“I guess that makes us even, then. I’ll let you get back to work. Goodnight, Maude.”

“Goodnight, Tom. And if you find you need something to keep you occupied, feel free to make me a list of at least five websites you like the looks of. Don’t forget to include exactly what you like and why you like it.”

He huffed. “Did you just assign me homework? Because it sounds very much like you assigned me homework.”

“Let’s call it project participation instead. Better?”

“Marginally.” He paused for a few seconds. “May I call you tomorrow after your seminar?”

“I’d be rather pissed if you didn’t.”

“And I’d be terribly disappointed if you weren’t. Goodnight again, Maude. Try and get some rest.”

“You too. Goodnight again, Tom.”

I hit end call and began the arduous process of hefting myself off the floor. It was even worse than I anticipated, and I was reasonably sure I bore a strong resemblance to a newborn calf standing up for the first time. Once I felt steady enough, I pulled my dress over my head, yanked off my bra and grabbed a T-shirt off the floor. I sniffed it…not bad. I slipped it on, grabbed my messenger bag and plopped down at the desk.  

***************************************************   My first mission was to find a videographer willing to work on extremely short notice. I’d decided to have these last two seminars recorded, hoping one or an edited combination of both would be good enough to post on my website for sale. Consulting was out of the question, but there was no reason to not make some residual cash after so many years of perfecting my lectures. Plus, it alleviated the bit of apprehension I felt at pulling the plug on everything in the blink of an eye. I found one that was open until 11 PM and had experience with marketing production - Kamana Media. I dialed the contact number, fingers crossed.

The rep seemed very excited when I told him what I wanted, but balked when I casually mentioned that I needed it done tomorrow and Wednesday. It took some seriously high levels of Maude-schmooze and tripling their normal rate, but they’d be at the hotel tomorrow morning at 9 AM.

Next came editing my presentations to remove all references to consultations, followed by a search for a shopping cart that worked with both my merchant account and design software. Then came my favorite part…getting the cart customized, adding items, and figuring out how to embed the code to my site files so it would display exactly the way I wanted. The next time I looked up, it was 1 AM and I still had some text modifications to complete, in addition to a ‘hey, so sorry, but I’m outta here’ letter to post on the site and across all my social media accounts. My phone vibrated, dancing its way nearly out of my reach. I picked it up, hoping it wasn’t a last minute kiss off text from the Kamana people, though they closed two hours prior.

Went out for a night walk and noticed that your lights are on. You can’t possibly still be awake at this hour, can you? –T

I’m not sure awake is an accurate representation of my state of consciousness, but I am not currently sleeping, so…technically, yeah. –M

I waited for his reply for a few minutes, but nothing came through. Figuring he might have gotten a call or had fallen asleep, I set the phone back on the table and returned to work. The text changes were easy, but then I realized the menus needed to be adjusted to remove several links. My ability to focus was fading fast, so I cranked up the volume on my iPod, hoping it would give me enough of a boost to power through. I ignored my mother’s voice in my head saying ‘Turn that down, young lady. Do you want to end up deaf? Everyone will think I’m a terrible mother!’ Junkie XL’s ‘Beauty Never Fades’ came on and I sighed happily…exactly what I needed. I put it on repeat.

The third time through I noticed movement out of the corner of my eye…my phone was doing the jig again. I paused the song and nabbed it just as it started to go over the edge of the desk. There were six texts, all from Tom.

“Damn.” I frowned and began to scroll through them.

I’m out in the hallway with a little surprise for you. Hope that’s okay. –T

Hmm, you aren’t answering your door. –T

Does that mean it’s NOT okay? – T

Still knocking. Can’t be too loud, don’t want to wake the neighbors. –T

Hope you’re alright in there. Starting to fret a bit. Ease my mind and reply, please.  –T

Maude, I know you’re in there, I can hear you singing. –T

The phone vibrated in my hand as I yanked out my earbuds, got up, and headed for the door. I undid the bolt and flung it open to find Tom in a white V-neck and navy shorts with an orange-red stripe, pacing and staring at his phone. He raised his head, exhaling seemingly with relief when he saw me. I spotted a carryout tray with two cups in it on the floor, as well as what appeared to be a bag of Lindor truffles. When I lifted my head to meet his gaze and instead caught him in the act of looking me up and down, I suddenly remembered that I was clad only in a thin T-shirt and panties. His eyes finally met mine again, lips parted just enough for his tongue to slip out and graze over them. I began fanning myself with my hand.

“Is it me or is it ridiculously warm tonight?” He said not a word, continuing staring at me with an intensity that made me want to push him down and ride him like a pony right there in the hallway.

“Yeah. Anyway. I had my iPod turned way up so I wouldn’t fall asleep at the wheel, as they say, and totally didn’t hear you knocking. And my phone was on vibrate too. Not that I would have heard it ring if it wasn’t. So. Really, really sorry about that.” I pointed to the truffles. “Please tell me that those are for me. And that the beverages are caffeinated.”

He shook his head as if to clear it and smiled as he put his phone in his pocket, then bent over to pick up the carryout tray. He took two steps towards the door. “Yes, and yes. But I’m afraid you can’t have them unless you invite me in.”

I snorted, stepping back to hold the door for him. “I’d invite Freddy Kruger in if he had Lindor Truffles and caffeine.” He didn’t move. “What? Damn you British and your impeccable manners. Thomas, would you care to enter my temporary domicile?”

He grinned. “Why yes, I thought you’d never ask.” I stuck my tongue out at him.

“You’d best get in here before I snatch that tray out of your hands and slam the door in your face.” He chuckled. I poked him in the chest. “I wasn’t joking.”

He patted my upper arm. “Oh, I’m aware. That’s why it’s funny.” He set the tray on the desk. “You have quite a lovely singing voice, by the way. Have you had any vocal training?”

“Thanks. And no, unless you count the band I was in a thousand years ago when I was young and didn’t know any better. Or when I’m driving. Or working. Or in the grocery store.” I rolled my eyes. “Or everyone’s favorite, when I think of the perfect song for the moment and belt it out no matter the location or company.”

He was leaning on the desk, legs and arms crossed, head tilted. “Do you like to dance, Maude?”

“No, I don’t like to dance.” I watched his face fall a bit. Such an easy mark. “I love to dance. Sometimes I even dance and sing at the same time. It all depends upon how the spirit moves me. Right now it’s moving me towards those truffles, though. Will you do the honors and open them, please?”

I put my phone on the table, walked over to the wardrobe, pulled a pair of cut-off sweatpants out of the drawer and slipped them on. Tom grabbed one of the oversized wing back chairs and dragged it over to the desk for himself. I sat back down in my spot, pulled the earbud jack out of the iPod, put it into shuffle mode and lowered the volume from ‘dance club’ to ‘study session’. He proffered the bag and I took a handful of truffles. I unwrapped one and popped it in my mouth.

“Ung. These are SO good.” I swallowed. “How did you manage to score these at one in the morning?”

“I’ll have you know that they are from my own personal stash. Which I normally never share. With anyone. But, being that you were generous enough to share your cookies with me earlier, I felt it was only fair to reciprocate in kind.” I nodded.

“Let’s not forget about the baked mozzarella, the parmesan fries and the fettucine alfredo I ‘shared’. Totally against my will.” I devoured two more tiny balls of chocolatey goodness. “So, you travel with candy. I would have accepted Luke’s offer immediately and without question if I’d known that.”

He laughed and handed me one of the to-go cups. “Earl Grey tea with a splash of cream. I figured you’d take it with sugar but wasn’t sure how much, so I brought these.”

He pulled a handful of sugar packets out of his pocket and put them on the desk. I took the lid off and took five sugars from the pile. They were warm to the touch, and knowing they had just been so close to his skin made me a little lightheaded. Or maybe it was just lack of sleep. Sure, Maude, keep telling yourself that. I shook my head.

“Damn, did I get that wrong? Luke said you asked for tea earlier so I assumed…” I cut him off.

“Nope, I’m a tea all the way. Coffee makes me ragey for some reason. Let me guess, you travel with teabags too?” He grinned.

“Indeed I do. I got the cups, tray and hot water from the all-night gas station down the road.”

I furrowed my brow. “So you did all this in, like, 15 minutes?” He held his hands out and shrugged, blushing slightly.

“Actually, I stopped at the gas station on the night walk I mentioned when we were texting.” I put the lid back on my tea and swirled it around to mix in the sugar. He pulled a plastic stirrer out of his other pocket and handed it to me, sighing as he realized I’d most likely have guessed that this encounter wasn’t at all spontaneous after hearing what he’d just said. He smiled self-consciously.

I reached out to put a hand on his knee, but he had begun sliding out of the chair towards the desk so he could grab his beverage and it wound up on his bare inner thigh instead. I could feel the muscle tighten under my hand, his hips thrusting upward reflexively in spite of his valiant effort to resist. I bit my lip and closed my eyes, opening them when I felt his hand on top of mine through his shorts. His jaw was clenched, nostrils flaring as he tried to control his breathing. My pulse was pounding in my ears and in my head and in my chest…and, most noticeably, in my groin. We exhaled in unison. He spoke first, taking my free hand in his.

“Maude, I…I am so, so sorry…I didn’t…” I shook my head vehemently.

“Thomas. Please. Don’t you dare apologize for what was perhaps the most sexually exciting moment of my life.” I bit my lip again, leaned in closer and raised an eyebrow. “So far.” He began rubbing my wrist with this thumb, his face a kaleidoscope of emotions.

“You…you’re…you aren’t offended?” He looked puzzled.

“By the fact that just putting my hand on your thigh earned me a pelvic thrust? Um, no. Nope. Not even a little.” I squeezed his hand. “Why would you think I’d be offended by a physical expression of something we’ve been bantering back and forth about for hours? And let’s not forget that you’ve literally seen me naked already.”

He shook his head. “I’m…I…damn. That’s not really what I meant. I was more referring to the idea that I’d arrived with tea and truffles not to spend time with you, but instead as a ruse to get you into bed. I didn’t. Honestly. I just don’t want you to think less of me, or that I don’t respect you, or that this is how I conduct myself with women I’ve just met, despite what most of the world seems to believe, and most importantly I absolutely don’t want you to conclude that I think you’re just another notch on my belt and that all I want from you is sex because that couldn’t be further from the truth …god, I’m fucking this up royally, aren’t I?” His chin fell to his chest.

I let go of his hand so I could touch his face. “You most certainly are not.”

We were both silent for what seemed like an eternity, La Roux’s “Tigerlily’ playing softly in the background.

“I could be here when you call I’ll make you top of the list And in the crush of the dark I’ll be your light in the mist I can see you burning with desire for a kiss Psychobabble all upon your lips”

He slowly raised his head as the chorus repeated, wrapping his fingers around my wrist and holding my hand to his face. I’d heard the song a hundred times, and sung it nearly as many, but suddenly the lyrics held meaning I could have never envisioned. The look in his eyes told me they resonated with him as well.

I slid the hand that was still on his thigh out from under his shorts and got up from my chair, closing the space between us in a single step. He looked up at me, eyes wide, as I climbed into his lap and straddled him. I felt his arm wrap around my waist as I leaned in and touched my lips to his. They were warm, and soft, and I couldn’t resist running my tongue across them. He opened his mouth to me in invitation, and I accepted with boundless enthusiasm. He tasted of chocolate, with a faint hint of something spicy I didn’t recognize. He bit my bottom lip before thrusting his tongue out to meet mine, and I seized the moment to capture and begin sucking on it. He groaned loudly and yanked the tie from my hair, freeing it so he could bury his fingers in my curls. Time seemed to have come to a screeching halt as we devoured each other, completely lost in the moment, until our teeth crashed together with such force that it made my ears ring and brought us back to reality.

I was panting like I’d run a six minute mile. “Shit. You okay?”

His chest heaved as he grinned. “I am positively divine, thank you.” I responded by grinding my pelvis against him, then pushed myself up and off his lap. “Maaauuuuuuddde. Where. Are. You. Going.”

I shimmied out of my sweat-shorts and returned to my spot, grinding against him again. “Mmm, that’s much better.” I dragged my hand down his chest and stomach, smirking as I slipped it under the hem of his V-neck. “May I?”

He leaned forward and lifted his arms over his head. I peeled it off slowly, drinking in the sight of his naked torso. Tossing the shirt to the side, I leaned in and licked the hollow above his collarbone. He gasped, and I traversed to his left nipple, first biting it gently, then suckling. His long, low moan was intoxicating, making me dizzy with want. I felt the warmth of his hand on the skin of my back as he pushed my T-shirt upward. I pulled back and raised my arms above my head before he even had a chance to ask for permission. He laughed.

“Eager, are we?” His voice was deeper than usual, throaty and full of ardor.

“You have no idea.” I was blinded momentarily as he finished removing my shirt. When my view was once again unobstructed, the intensity in his stare as he gazed from my breasts to my face then back again made me wonder if spontaneous combustion was in my near future. He let out a low whistle.

“Oh, but I believe I do, Maude. I believe I do.” He took one in each hand, running a thumb over each already rock hard nipple, then pulled me forward to take one in his mouth. It was my turn to gasp, and I wound my fingers in his hair, holding him to me. He alternated from one to the other, and I felt his hand creep down my stomach, finally reaching my mound and cupping it gently. My panties were soaked through. He let my nipple go with a pop and looked up at me, eyes dark and pupils blown wide with desire.

“My apologies, you were, in fact, correct…I had no idea.” He slid his hand under the elastic waistband, whining audibly when it met skin that was waxed bare and dripping wet. He tugged at the fabric, unable to utter anything other than “Off. Please.”

I stood, pushing them down over my legs, then kicked them off. I paused for a moment to take him in, my eyes resting on the bulge tenting his shorts that made it glaringly obvious he had opted for going commando this evening. I stepped between his legs, leaning down to slip my hands under his shorts at the waist. I hesitated, knowing we were near the point of no return but hadn’t covered all our bases. I looked up at him.

“So. Tests?” It took him a moment to piece together what I was getting at.

“Yes. Last year. Clean. No one since. You?”

“2010. Clean. No one since. On the pill.” His eyes widened in surprise and I didn’t wait for him to comment. “Yes, five years. I’m very…particular.” I grabbed onto his waistband and pulled with one hand, tapping his hip with the other. “Lift.”

He raised his hips up and I eased the shorts over his erection, then slipped them off his ass and down his legs. He smiled as I licked my lips, then grunted as I took him in hand. At least eight inches of glorious purpose, and almost too thick for me to get my fingers around. I leaned in to whisper in his ear as I stroked up and down, squeezing, pausing now and again to run my thumb over his weeping slit.

“It’s no wonder Loki thinks he deserves a throne. THIS is the cock of a king.” He growled, a sound so low and deep that I could actually see his chest vibrating, and began to lift himself up off the chair.

I let go of his cock and put both hands on his shoulders, pushing him firmly back into a seated position as I nestled my knees on either side of his hips. He raised his brows quizzically, eyes narrowed.

“No bed?” I shook my head. He looked down at himself, then back at me, concerned. It finally dawned on me what he was getting at, and I supposed that his size might be a challenge for some women if they weren’t sufficiently aroused. I shook my head again and rubbed my soaked pussy up and down his shaft, groaning as the tip hit my clit over and over.

“Nope.” Groan. “I’m good.” He reached between us, sliding two long fingers inside me. I came instantly, and the look on his face was priceless.

“Di..I…did you…did you just…” I rolled my hips and squeezed his fingers, grasping his face with both hands as I leaned in to pull his bottom lip into my mouth briefly. He moaned as he withdrew his fingers and brought them to my lips. I licked at them, then sucked them clean greedily. I felt him shudder as I rose up on my knees. He breathed deeply, inhaling and exhaling for a few moments as he tried to pull himself back from the edge.

“Maude.”

“Tom.”

“Not going to last long.”

“Don’t care.”

“I…I…Mau…”

I kissed him sloppily, cutting him off, then spoke.

“Thomas. William. Hiddleston. Shut up and fuck me already.”

Before I even got the ‘me already’ out the head of his cock was poised at my entrance, and our eyes locked as I pushed down and he pushed up, meeting no resistance and fully seating himself in a single thrust. He stared at me in wonder, mouth agape, gasping and grabbing onto my hips as I began to ride him.

“Maude…that…you…how…all of me…GOD…feels incredible…you…so warm…so WET.” He began thrusting, and I squeezed, matching his rhythm. His eyes rolled back in his head for a few seconds, then met mine again. “Close. Too close.” He maneuvered his hand between us again, rubbing my clit furiously with two fingers. I rolled my hips faster, chanting his name as my walls clenched around him.

“Tom. Tom. Tom. Tom.” Words quickly failed me and my chant devolved into a monosyllabic keen. His thrusts faltered, stuttering, and he cried out.

“Oh, Maude, god, Maude, oh FUCK, oh Maude…” I felt him pulsing inside me, come jetting in long, slow spurts, the edges of my vision going dark, hearing screaming as I came that I didn’t initially recognize as my own.  

***************************************************   When I began to emerge from what I thought was a post-coital haze, Tom’s arms were wrapped tightly around my limp torso, holding me to his chest. My head lolled on his shoulder, his chin nuzzling my neck. I raised a leaden arm and set about rubbing his back. I felt him smile.

“Well hello there.” His voice was just above a whisper. As I raised my head to look at him, my body shifted and I realized he was still inside me. He smiled sheepishly when I met his gaze. “Sorry about that. I didn’t want to wake you.” I yawned.

“Mmm, I’m totally fine with staying this way forever.” I leaned back, cocking my head, puzzled. “Wake me? What do you mean, wake me?”

He grinned and kissed the tip of my nose. “It appears the vigorousness of our…activities…combined with the lateness of the hour exhausted you completely, resulting in your dozing off for a bit.”

I groaned. “Um, how long was I, you know, dozing?”

He traced my spine with his fingertips. “About fifteen minutes or so.”

I covered my eyes with my hand and shook my head. “Fuck. Me. Sideways.” He leaned in to whisper in my ear.

“Let’s save that for next time. You, darling, need to get some sleep.” I sighed, figuring he’d be out the door as soon as I was off his lap. I tried to reach my T-shirt, which was behind me on the floor, intending to use it to contain some of the mess when I got up. His was already in his hand. “Here, let me help.”

I lifted myself off him slowly, wondering how it was that my legs weren’t asleep. He gently nudged the shirt in place as his cock slid out of me. He was at half-mast. I bit my lip and rocked my hips. He chuckled as he put his hands under my arms to help me stand.

“Don’t tempt me, woman. It’s taking every ounce of my willpower to refrain from fucking you into that mattress all night long.” I whined. “But you have a very long day ahead of you and it’s well past 2 AM.” He walked me to the bathroom, closing the door after I went inside. I bundled up the shirt, tossing it on the floor as I sat on the bowl to pee, wiped, flushed, then brushed my teeth quickly. I opened the door, fully expecting him to be gone.

He was standing right outside, waiting, and kissed me quickly. “Do you have an extra toothbrush I can use?” I shook my head. “May I use yours, then?”

I nodded. “Sure. Yeah.”

I stood in my stupor, listening to the toilet flush again, the water running, him spitting…and suddenly there he was, naked, smiling, beautiful, and herding me over to the king size bed. He pulled back the covers, motioned for me to climb in and glanced at the clock.

“What time do you need to be up?” I blinked.

“Um, seven? I guess?” He set the alarm and stood next to the bed. I just stared at him. He grinned.

“Well, are you going to move over or would you prefer that I get in on the other side?” I moved over and rolled onto my side. He climbed in and nestled in against my back, arm around my waist. He kissed the top of my head.

“Goodnight, my Maude.”

I was sound asleep before I could return the sentiment.

[giannisbct-blog]

"Calm down DJ Khaled...”

Over the last week and a half I have been developing my musical composition, and boy what a mission it has been. After listening to my samples I figured i needed a beat in the background and then a basic melody. I would use the text to speech code as “lyrics” or rather to add a spoken component to it. 

My first step was to develop the background beat as all the timing would go off this, also because I figured this would be one of the easier parts. I decided to use the sound of my lens crash zooming as a “kick” or more bass drum because it is quite a dull thud sound. Isolating one “thud” from the sample was easy but it was the editing of the sound that was tricky. On its own it doesn’t really have any power or weight behind it so I really needed to beef it up a little so a lot of trial and error went down. The most useful plugin that I used for this was the Spectral Gate, I had never used this not even in the Soundscape project in the first semester  so I managed to find a apple support page that was my absolute best friend for this. (https://documentation.apple.com/en/logicstudio/effects/index.html#chapter=6%26section=5%26tasks=true)

On top of the bass drum I needed a higher drum, like a snare and a high hat to give the beat a more dynamic sound so it wasn’t simply monotone. For both of these I actually managed to use the same organic sound, just the scroll wheel on the top of the camera that is used for shutter speed control. To achieve different sounds I had to obviously add different effects to it. These were solely chosen using trial and error, which I know is not the most time efficient way but seeing as I didn’t know the exact terminology for the effects I was trying to achieve, it made it very difficult to search for them.

When I mixed these three sounds together I got quite a convincing drum kit, which is the effect I was going for because even though I was using completely non musical sound samples, I was trying to make it sound like an actual piece of electronic music so I am quite happy that I managed to get the sounds to where they ended up.

These are the original sound files:

Zoom: (https://soundcloud.com/user-167119002/4a-1) Scroll: (https://soundcloud.com/user-167119002/2a-1)

And here are the manipulated sounds that make up the drum kit:

Kick: (https://soundcloud.com/user-167119002/zoom-3) Snare: (https://soundcloud.com/user-167119002/zoom-1) High Hat: (https://soundcloud.com/user-167119002/zoom-highhat)

The next step was to make some chords that would be repeating throughout the song to give the song a more colourful appeal rather than just having the melody as the only “bright” sound if you will. I hadn’t originally decided to do this when I was planning it out but the idea came to me when I was on the bus listening to some music and I noticed that a lot of electronic music does actually have some chords in the back ground (which the melody is then based off). Because of this factor I decided that once the chords were finished I would have to develop the melody because they are so closely linked. My two main helps for this part of the process were some videos I found on Youtube. The first was was intended to be a joke video but surprisingly was extremely helpful with linking the melody to the chords. (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wyydWaVyJB8) and the other really helped speed up the process of deciding which notes to use to make up the chords (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ntZuw4-G5d4&t=415s). As I have little to no knowledge of music theory these were extremely helpful but I feel if I had longer to do this project (much longer) I would like to learn some music theory before hand because it would make the whole process easier and would allow me to get more creative with the sounds. Having said that, simply doing the work helped me learn some music theory about which notes go with which ones and rules on timings for example. It isn’t a whole lot but it is the basics which would make any future musical project a whole lot easier. 

When writing the chords though I encountered a little problem. For the melody I had two different beeps from my camera, one from the focus and one from the touch screen on board, however I didn’t really have anything sustained that I could use to make chords. I tried extending the sounds but they didn’t work and as the camera doesn’t make any sustained sounds I had to cheat a little. I ended up using a synth (which I developed myself to keep it original) but as I was learning how to use the software instrument synth I was using I stumbled across a video where it was explaining how to make a synth sound in the style of Big Room House music (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=esMyeoXOmKg). In the video he explains that a main feature in this synth is that there is some “noise” in the back of it, essentially some static. So instead of adding this in artificially I took the sound file I created from the RAW image data for my last interrogation and used that as the back ground “noise”.

Here is the sample of the beeps I then manipulated into the melody:

https://soundcloud.com/user-167119002/beep-2 https://soundcloud.com/user-167119002/beep-1

The voice sample I had was literally just text to speech reading a part of the code of the image data, however instead of just getting one sample I decided to get two but in different voices, a man’s voice and a woman’s voice. This would hopefully add a dynamic aspect to it because text to speech is extremely monotone and so a bit of variation would aid in this aspect, also the effects I added to them also helped diversify them a bit more. I decided to not use the whole samples but just the first few seconds of each and then loop them. This wasn’t because I am lazy but actually because repetition especially in vocals is a key aspect of electronic music today, as I discovered while reading Curtis Roads’ book, Composing Electronic Music: A New Aesthetic [1]. While doing a bit of background research for some inspiration I came across the book and only read few pages but since I have finished the composition, I have been reading a bit more of it (well as much as google books lets you) and it is extremely interesting to see the science and theory behind something that I take so easily for granted. I believe it really explains well how electronic music isn’t as easy as people think (and I now understand that completely after this project) and that there is a real art form behind it.

Before I finally exported the final composition I asked Daniel and Adam to take a listen and give me their thoughts on it. Luckily I did as they picked up a couple of timing issues that I didn’t because I had listened to it so many times. Another thing they also mentioned was that it was maybe too repetitive especially the voice and suggested I add some distortion or something of the likes to part of the “vocals” to add a bit of flavour to the whole thing. And thus the sound track behind my project Visual Noise was born.

https://soundcloud.com/user-167119002/visual-noise

Now I understand that this blog post was super descriptive and I really need to be reflective with this sort of stuff but I feel like I had to get these ideas and processes out there just so I could reinforce my learning and make sure that I understand what I have done. Because if you can’t explain what you have done, do you really know what you have done. As they say teaching someone else to do something that you know is the best way to check that you understand the topic. That is also why I think that blogging is important because it contributes to your learning and as it has been said many times it helps you organise your thoughts.

One major thing I learned during this project which is not totally related to the subject matter (apart from all the skills and music knowledge) is that social media is an awesome platform for learning. I could have paid lots of money or even trawled through Lynda.com to find some tutorials to help me through the process or I could have (and did) just search what I wanted to know in Youtube. There are thousands of tutorial videos for everything I needed on there for any skill level. This is partly also because the idea of electronic music production is so easy to get into, as hater say, “any kid with a laptop could make that”. Well I’m that kid with a laptop and no knowledge and so the fact that there are platforms such as Youtube which allow for this kind of education is incredible. Because without something like that there would be lots of people out there that can’t do many of the things they do. There have been several studies around the idea of learning through social media which highlight the fact that in the changing world of today, education needs to also adapt to cater for the skills and mindsets of the students who are used to using social platforms to gain knowledge even on obscure topics [2]. 

The next step for me is to develop the video now for the visual aspect then combine the two to develop the final integrative practice piece.

[1]: Roads, C. (2015). Composing electronic music: a new aesthetic. Oxford University Press, USA.

[2]: Gikas, J., & Grant, M. M. (2013). Mobile computing devices in higher education: Student perspectives on learning with cellphones, smartphones & social media. The Internet and Higher Education, 19, 18-26.

[lanasitra]

Honeymoon Notes | What’s It Like?

           Composed in the summer of 2013

             I wrote “What’s It Like?” when I was going through both the “I’m not happy with myself” phase and the “I think I’m going to die any day now” phase. In tandem with these two trains of thought, something that would become a recurring practice for me toward the end of my first year of university was the gross over-analysis of my contemporary situation, as well as those of my potential futures. At one point, I had a breakdown because I felt that, once I had found “the one” and settled down, there would come a day where nothing excited me anymore; I felt I would just be bored, scrolling through YouTube videos until I died. Another side of me thought these feelings may be symptomatic of the relationship I was in; maybe I wasn’t feeling stimulated because the relationship wasn’t good enough to stimulate me. Yet another part of me thought every single relationship would turn out this way (which is a problem in itself, because it indicates I put “finding a partner” on a pedestal and was neglecting the health of my internal world). These fears are significant factors in “What’s It Like?” The impetus to write began with me scrolling through Facebook, looking at photos of couples on their various summer trips, ostensibly happier than I had been in a long time. I wanted to ask these people, “what’s your secret?” or, “what’s it like to be that happy all the time?” And so it began.

           Despite what an inattentive audience might initially think (this piece has been called “depressing” – even labeled “dark pop” – by some of my peers), “What’s It Like?” is actually built on a theme of hopeful defiance. Despite my emotionally heavy questions that will never be answered in a satisfactory manner, “I am quite alright… One day, I’ll get it right, / But, for now, I’ll hold on tight.” “What’s It Like?” is about acceptance of the lows and faith in oneself that you’ll come out on top eventually. In the final chorus, I make the realization that the perfection I see in other people is just smoke and mirrors: “Everyone, hold on tight. / It’s all going to be alright. / I promise it’ll be alright.” We are all in the same boat and need reciprocal love and support.

           The album recording of “What’s It Like?” is built on a single, simultaneous take of both guitar and vocals, recorded backstage in the Roy Barnett Recital Hall of UBC in 2015. Because there is clear bleed in both the vocal track and guitar track, it was incredibly difficult to do much meaningful editing on either source without introducing notable artifacts. Though I added a number of vocal overdubs and the underlying pad, the main vocal and guitar remain relatively untouched, which ultimately led to what could be considered “squandered potential” on both fronts.

BUT TUHSWUHTUHMUS! WHY WOULDN’T YOU JUST RECORD THEM SEPARATELY?! Back in 2014 and early 2015, I had incredible difficulty recording these particular vocals separately from the guitar and actually have it sound good. I feel part of the reason is that there is an intensity in my voice when I sing and play simultaneously that just isn’t there when I sing separate takes. Secondly, my vocal intonation straight up sucked (more than usual) against a recording of just the guitar. After months of trying, I decided to just say, “f*** it, this is literally the only way I can get a passable recording of this piece.” I felt an enormous pressure to get “What’s It Like?” on Honeymoon because it was – and still is – obvious to me that, to an audience, it is one of the most “poppy,” accessible and engaging pieces in my oeuvre. I was therefore going to jump through any hoops necessary to release the piece.

           I don’t remember exactly when I decided to include the foley-pad in “What’s It Like,” but I recall 2014 and 2015 being a time period in which I became privy to a handful of techniques used to make a chorus jump out at a listener. Based on my experiences and opinions, the best choruses tend to be held up by pads prolonging the tonic or a progression of the most harmonically relevant notes. The pads don’t need to be in the listener’s face, but they’re usually there to fill the space. Again, it was clear to me and to others that “What’s It Like” had incredible potential, so I wanted to try anything to make it hit hard.

           The spring of 2015 saw me give a presentation to my “History of Music Since 1900” class about the work of my close friend Kjel Sidloski. His album, Ad viger, had fascinated me due to its ability to move in and out of a multitude of styles without ever feeling incoherent (an impressive balancing act at a time when some people still put pieces and artists in little boxes and create personal expectations based on those boxes). Part of my presentation’s thesis was that Kjel is able to create cohesion across Ad viger by making the album gapless and using foley as a bridging mechanism between each piece. Ad viger presents a world to its audience; a world I dive deeply into with every listen. This immersive quality is an aspect I desired for Honeymoon, so I began collecting my own field recordings to act as gaps and help coalesce the project.

           Some time down the road, I managed to get an audio recording of my friends Ava, Taylor and Laura conversing in a taxi following a particularly heavy night out. While the content of this conversation will remain confidential, I found it intense enough to find a place at the back end of Honeymoon – but not, as we can hear, as a gap. While tinkering with the audio file, I created a pad by applying a mixture of reverbs, EQ and auto-tune. “What’s It Like?” has been taken to the next level by this pad, and I’m fairly proud of the fact that it’s not some b***s*** midi string section or synth; the pad is unique to “What’s It Like” (and “Sunrise,” for that matter), as well as to me as an artist.

           The addition of the floor tom only made sense; it compliments the growing intensity of the piece and highlights the rhythmic syncopation of the harmonic progression. I feel as though the idea was in my head from the get-go, but my desire to add percussion was clear by September of 2014.

           (Regarding the Remaster) I did try to retake the vocals for “What’s It Like?” prior to releasing the Honeymoon remaster on iTunes. However, while my pitch accuracy was notably better in some spots, my delivery was sterile. In all honesty, I just don’t sing “What’s It Like?” quite the same way anymore, even with a guitar; my performance no longer has such gritty, pleading intensity. Once in a blue moon, I can recapture that grit and retain good intonation, but, for now, a consistent balance eludes me.

I was tearing myself up about these vocals until I read a Facebook status posted by my friend Heather Gunn. In this status, she says:

“Because of how rooted our culture is in capitalism and consumerism, people think they can't make music if the music they make wouldn't be ‘worth buying’… if there's one other thing I can say for sure, it's that making music makes people happy… since I'm someone who ‘does music’, I hold myself to pretty ridiculous standards - I can't let anyone hear me if I'm less than perfect, I can't make any music if it's not ‘worth buying’. Anyway. I want to change that way of thinking” (15 March 2016)

           Funnily enough, I had this very same struggle with “What’s It Like?” upon Honeymoon’s initial release eight months earlier. It took hearing the perspective of others to sit back and say, “no, this is the most honest version of the piece. I am willing to accept an imperfection or two if it means retaining emotional integrity.” Here I am again – same song, same struggle. However, Heather’s status came at the perfect time. Once again, I was able to say, “no, this is the song’s pure essence, and this is what I need it to be.” I am a perfectionist elsewhere on Honeymoon, but I savor the fact that I am mentally and emotionally capable of letting go for a few moments here and there. I feel this approach gives the Honeymoon recordings realism and personality, thereby setting them apart – even in the tiniest capacity – from their pop contemporaries. Furthermore, I just remain a little saner, as opposed to obsessing over cent deviations in pitch and rubati that shift the rhythm by less than an eighth of a second.

Don’t mistake what I’m saying here for the same complacency that led to me sucking as a songwriter in mid-2014 (see “Honeymoon Notes | Canadian Summer”). I still hold myself to a high standard, much like Heather. However, as with Heather, I am beginning to see where to draw the line between just enough and too much.

 Namaste

-       t s w t m s