#truth be told i did not know what to believe cause of what people around me said and it felt conflicting at the time?? if it makes sense?? | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

saintsenara · 8 months ago

Note

Riddle’s extremely fearful and aggressive reaction to Dumbledore when he thinks he’s a doctor (and the fact that he assumes this at all and believes he is being lied to) has some pretty dark implications (which of course no one follows up on). Do you have thoughts?

thank you very much for the ask, anon!

and yes - this has occurred to me too... which means that my thoughts come with a trigger warning for the sexual abuse of a child, and are under the cut.

the relevant scene in canon is, of course, this:

“I am Professor Dumbledore.” “Professor?” repeated Riddle. He looked wary. “Is that like doctor? What are you here for? Did she get you in to have a look at me?” He was pointing at the door through which Mrs. Cole had just left. “No, no,” said Dumbledore, smiling. “I don’t believe you,” said Riddle. “She wants me looked at, doesn’t she? Tell the truth!” He spoke the last three words with a ringing force that was almost shocking. It was a command, and it sounded as though he had given it many times before. His eyes had widened and he was glaring at Dumbledore, who made no response except to continue smiling pleasantly. After a few seconds Riddle stopped glaring, though he looked, if anything, warier still. “Who are you?” “I have told you. My name is Professor Dumbledore and I work at a school called Hogwarts. I have come to offer you a place at my school - your new school, if you would like to come.” Riddle’s reaction to this was most surprising. He leapt from the bed and backed away from Dumbledore, looking furious. “You can’t kid me! The asylum, that’s where you’re from, isn’t it? ‘Professor,’ yes, of course - well, I’m not going, see? That old cat’s the one who should be in the asylum. I never did anything to little Amy Benson or Dennis Bishop, and you can ask them, they’ll tell you!”

the surface-level reading of this scene - which is clearly what the text wants us to go for - is that riddle thinks he's about to be institutionalised for being "mad" - and, specifically, that he thinks that what dumbledore has been told is his "madness" is actually his magic.

[he is also clearly meant to be read as panicking a little bit that he's fucked around torturing his fellow children and is now about to find out...]

that riddle accepts he's a wizard so easily - and that he is so reassured by dumbledore agreeing that he's not mad - is something the text wants us to read as sinister. him immediately describing himself as "special" is set up as a precursor to the adult voldemort's delusions of grandeur - which the entire arc of the series, ending in his death as an ordinary man, is designed to undermine.

but i've always disliked this reading. the eleven-year-old riddle - a magical child raised around non-magical people - is objectively correct to describe his powers as "special" [in that they make him identifiably different from the crowd] within the context in which he lives. the word choice is nowhere near as deep as dumbledore decides - he's clearly known since he was very young that he's a wizard, but he didn't have the precise language to describe this fundamental part of himself until dumbledore offered it; prior to that, "special" is a perfectly reasonable alternative term.

and, in always knowing that he's a wizard, he also knows that he doesn't have a mental illness - but he must also know that this is something it's near impossible for him to prove.

in the real world, if i spoke to a patient who told me:

“I can make things move without touching them. I can make animals do what I want them to do, without training them. I can make bad things happen to people who annoy me. I can make them hurt if I want to.”

then i would be correct to describe them as experiencing psychosis. and i might - depending on their other symptoms - have reasonable cause to admit them [voluntarily or not] for psychiatric treatment.

riddle is - of course - demonstrably not psychotic. but it's not unreasonable that mrs cole would assume he is - the world she lives in, as a muggle [even if she's a religious one], is one in which people do not possess the ability to move objects or control animals with their minds, and if one of her charges is convinced that he can, then she's justified in seeking medical intervention.

[that psychiatric treatment in the 1930s can be described without exaggeration as inhumane is another matter...]

which is to say, i think we can easily suppose that mrs cole has - prior to dumbledore's arrival - succeeded in having riddle "looked at", and that the idea that he's mentally ill and should be committed to an asylum has been mentioned before. i think most of us would be instinctively [and angrily] wary of doctors if this happened to us, regardless of how nice the doctors in question were.

and maybe that's all there is to it.

and maybe it isn't...

in the doylist text, the eleven-year-old riddle's personality is the way it is because he's the villain of the series. where harry is preternaturally capable, even as a child, of all the things the series defines as admirable - above all, enduring difficulty without complaint - riddle is preternaturally incapable of them. he's meant to come across as unambiguously sinister - and the fact that the text repeatedly emphasises that he has control over his unpleasant traits invites us to view him as someone who is acting with full agency. that he lives in an orphanage is a trope which the text uses, like a campy horror film might, predominately to underscore how creepy he is - and the text, in keeping with its general lack of interest in states and their institutions, never really prompts us to interrogate the impact of his childhood upon the course his life takes.

[this is despite the fact that voldemort's reliving of the night he killed the potters in deathly hallows is an incredibly accurate depiction of ptsd...]

but it's also the case that the eleven-year-old riddle's behaviour and personality fits a pattern we might expect to see in a child who is being abused, sexually or otherwise:

he's aggressive, he has a hair-trigger temper, and he becomes distressed even by behaviour - such as dumbledore speaking mildly and calmly - which would not ordinarily be expected to provoke such a reaction.

his broader emotional state is fractious. his mood changes sharply, he seems to feel emotions very profoundly, he struggles to control his emotional response to things, he's extremely easily irritated, he's attention-seeking - and he particularly seeks negative attention, and he's very highly-strung. his admission in deathly hallows that he feels calm before he kills - or before he otherwise eradicates a threat or a problem - comes with the flip-side that he's someone who appears, when things aren't going well or he finds himself in a situation which he can't control, to become quite anxious. which is a trauma response.

he's extremely isolated. the text presents the fact that he has no friends as a deliberate choice - "lord voldemort has never had a friend, nor do i believe that he has ever wanted one" - and his relationship with everyone else he ever meets, including his fellow orphans, is defined by the text as exclusively involving him controlling, manipulating, and punishing them. or: he is always the more powerful person in the pairing. but this need for control can be read as self-protective just as easily as it can be read as sinister. there are hints in canon that riddle is not just some malevolent force in the orphanage preying on mild-mannered innocents. for example, billy stubbs, the owner of the rabbit he kills, is targeted by riddle as revenge: “Billy Stubbs’s rabbit... well, Tom said he didn’t do it and I don’t see how he could have done, but even so, it didn’t hang itself from the rafters, did it? [...] But I’m jiggered if I know how he got up there to do it. All I know is he and Billy had argued the day before." on the rare occasions billy turns up in fics, he's usually - i find - written very like neville - sweet and guileless and a bit pathetic. but the alternative reading - especially when we take into account that riddle attacks the rabbit rather than billy himself - is that billy is someone he would be afraid to physically confront. indeed, it's striking that voldemort - at all stages of his life - is described as being quite physically fragile. not only is he very thin, but he's always cold and his heartbeat is described several times in canon as irregular. i think this is supposed to be a comment on the physical changes he undergoes the more horcruxes he makes - although the idea that the soul would affect the heart doesn't actually align with how the series understands the soul to relate to the body - but it can also be interpreted perfectly legitimately as something he was experiencing prior to splitting his soul. i am committed to the headcanon that riddle was quite a sickly child - and that this is one of the things which drives his fear of death - and i'm also committed to the idea that his obsession with magic is because the enormity of his magical power makes up for his physical lack. he can defeat - and humiliate and frighten and remove the threat of - billy or dennis [or even an adult man?] with magic. without it, if they were to physically overpower him, then he wouldn't be able to throw them off.

he is extremely nervous about being alone in a room with dumbledore - someone he doesn't know, and who he assumes is connected to a profession [and, maybe, who knows any other doctors he's been previously made to see...] of which he is frightened.

he doesn't trust or confide in anyone - which, as a child, means particularly that he doesn't trust or confide in adults in positions of responsibility. he's clearly uneasy with the idea of finding himself in the subordinate position in an adult-child relationship when dumbledore offers to take him shopping for school supplies - potentially because he's worried that dumbledore will try and dictate or restrict what he's allowed to buy unless he behaves in a certain way... and i am always very struck that dumbledore says in half-blood prince: "He was very guarded with me; he felt, I am sure, that in the thrill of discovering his true identity he had told me a little too much. He was careful never to reveal as much again." this is presented in the text as evidence that dumbledore is the only person of whom voldemort is afraid - by which the text means that voldemort acknowledges that dumbledore knows that an ordinary man, mortal and unimpressive, lurks behind the mask of unassailable power he has created for himself; and which the text thinks is a good thing. but we can also read it as a self-protective act on riddle's part. in his excitement, he offers dumbledore information [that he is known to be a liar, that he is in trouble a lot, that mrs cole dislikes him and is disinclined to believe anything he says] which would give dumbledore - or anyone in a similar position of power and presumed respectability - cover to abuse him, safe in the knowledge that he would be unlikely to be believed if he reported it.

he doesn't appear to feel safe in the orphanage and he's frequently absent from it - by his own admission, he spends a huge amount of time wandering around london on his own, which may even involve him staying away for several days at a time. nobody appears to notice or care about this.

he's very independent - which the text again presents as evidence of his deliberate self-isolation and rejection of the bonds of love and friendship - and his independence is unusual for a child his age [i.e. that he is capable of doing all his own shopping for school].

his knowledge of violence - i.e. how he designs the trip to the cave to be maximally psychologically devastating for dennis and amy and devoid of repercussions for himself - is also more advanced and methodical than would be expected in a child of his age. again, the text uses this to emphasise how inextricable the child-voldemort is from his adult self - and also, to some extent, to underscore the intellectual brilliance [his magic is also more advanced than is normal for a child] which his narrative archetype [the exceptional villain who is defeated by the everyman hero] requires. but we can also read it as evidence of his own victimisation. a common sign that a child is being sexually abused is that they display a knowledge of sexual behaviour which is more advanced than is reasonable for a child of their age - for example, knowing in detail how a sex act is performed, or fluently using sexual slang which they have no chance of knowing either from age-appropriate settings like school-based sex education or conversations with a parent or trusted adult, or from the sort of enthusiastic hoarding of rude words and phrases all children enjoy as they grow up. riddle's precise, clinical knowledge of how to manipulate, frighten, torture, and control can be seen as something similar. if he can - at eleven or younger - methodically break down another child until they're "never quite right" again, then this is because he's learned how to from someone.

he keeps secrets. and he also goes out of his way to extract them. his grooming of ginny in chamber of secrets - he manipulates her into confiding things she wants to keep to herself, promises he won't tell anyone, and then uses the threat that he will to get her to do his bidding - is an absolutely textbook example of how abusers use the idea of secrecy to control their victims. it doesn't make his abuse of ginny any less inexcusable if we assume he learns this from being on the other side of things.

dumbledore understands his little cache of objects as trophies he's taken from victims - and the text takes the view that dumbledore is correct in this assessment. that hoarding trophies is something widely associated with serial killers means that this is yet another thing which underlines how creepy - and how like his adult self - the child-voldemort is. but it's also the case that the adult - and teenage - voldemort places a lot of emphasis on gift-giving as part of his control over other people. the two most obvious examples in canon are wormtail being given his shiny hand as a reward for helping voldemort get his body back, and slughorn being buttered up with crystallised pineapple before voldemort asks him about horcruxes. the text thinks this is sinister - and one of the reasons it does this is because gift-giving is a grooming tactic. the text also clearly thinks this isn't behaviour voldemort has learned from the other side. and yet a common sign that a child is being abused is if they have possessions it doesn't make sense for them to own [i.e. a child from a low-income background who is suddenly decked in designer clothes] and which they can't or won't explain how they came by. riddle's cache isn't luxurious - although he's so poor that a yoyo or a mouth organ probably is a luxury to him - but there's also nothing in canon which precludes the objects being presents, rather than stolen goods. if the spell dumbledore uses to make the box rattle is caused by a statement which is both relatively ambiguous and dependent on dumbledore's subjective personal morality - is there anything in this room he's acquired through nefarious means? - then the spell would still work as it does in canon if riddle was an abuse victim given the objects as "rewards". dumbledore's tendency to locate right and wrong in the individual and dumbledore's belief that good people should steadfastly endure misery means he can be written entirely canon-coherently as someone who would think a victim who appeared to collude in their own abuse - such as a victim who "offered" a sexual act because their abuser promised them something if they did - was behaving consensually, manipulatively, and nefariously. and it's worth noting that when riddle doesn't know what dumbledore has done to make the box rattle, he is "unnerved". when he realises dumbledore thinks he's stolen the objects - and that he has no interest in forcing him to admit this aloud - he is "unabashed". perhaps because he's just received proof that an experience he doesn't want to talk about is still secret...

on the other hand, the objects could indeed be stolen - because petty criminality and anti-social behaviour, especially in pre-teen children, is also a sign of abuse.

he can be extremely obsequious - when dumbledore tells him to watch how he speaks he becomes "unrecognisably polite", he ruthlessly flatters slughorn, and he is cringingly deferential to hepzibah smith. the text understands this as evidence that his apparent charm is only superficial - another trait associated in the popular imagination with serial killers [and it's striking that so much about the young voldemort - handsome, charming, seemingly quiet and polite, true evil lurking underneath the mask - is exactly like the pop-culture persona which has been created for ted bundy...]. voldemort himself agrees that his charm is performative in chamber of secrets: “If I say it myself, Harry, I’ve always been able to charm the people I needed. So Ginny poured out her soul to me, and her soul happened to be exactly what I wanted." but his obsequiousness is also a fawn response - a way of minimising a threat by attempting to please the person issuing it. he becomes "unrecognisably polite" - after all - in response to this: Dumbledore raised his eyebrows. “If, as I take it, you are accepting your place at Hogwarts - ” “Of course I am!” “Then you will address me as ‘Professor’ or ‘sir.’ ” Riddle’s expression hardened for the most fleeting moment before he said, in an unrecognisably polite voice, “I’m sorry, sir. I meant - please, Professor, could you show me - ?” riddle could reasonably interpret what dumbledore says here as a threat to prevent him attending hogwarts - even though dumbledore evidently doesn't mean it in this way - and he switches to being fawning because this is something he really doesn't want to happen...

do i think that any of this is what the text was actually going for? no. and nor do i think that reading riddle as a victim of abuse excuses the violence which the adult voldemort goes on to perpetuate.

but i think it is a reading of his characterisation which is both canon-plausible and interesting - a strange, sickly child with a reputation for cruelty and dishonesty being abused by the respectable doctor who is constantly called in to treat his coughs and wheezes, who buys him little presents and charms him into telling him secrets, who then [to paraphrase the teenage voldemort] feeds him a few secrets of his own, safe in the knowledge that nobody will ever believe him if he tries to get help.

and i also think this a reading which is sincerely important.

a significant contributor to the prevalence of child abuse - no matter what exact form this abuse takes - is that we are culturally conditioned to imagine that both the abuser and the victim will look and behave in a certain way if the abuse is "real".

and this means, all too often, that we take child abuse more seriously when the victim is "sympathetic" - when they're from a stable home, and their family are respectable, and they do well in school, and they're polite and sweet, and they look innocent, and they behave perfectly appropriately for their age, and nobody would ever dare to say that they come across as older than they are, and they're white, and they don't have a history of lying, and they don't have a history of attention-seeking, and they don't have a criminal record, and they're not abusive themselves, and there's absolutely no way of suggesting that they colluded in their abuse, and the perpetrator was someone who looks like a child abuser.

someone who is creepy, low-status, ugly, unpopular. someone who everyone can tell is socially abnormal, someone who nobody would ever intentionally permit to be around their children. not someone who is charming, well-respected, attractive, rich, popular, trustworthy. not someone who has a loving family and a happy home. not someone we might be friends with.

but many perpetrators of child abuse are these second group of people. and many victims of child abuse are "unsympathetic", when their social positions and reputations are compared to their abusers' own.

they lie. they steal. they're attention-seeking. they're vindictive. they have trouble distinguishing between imagination and reality. they're violent. they're bullies. they hurt animals. they abuse other children. they take drugs. they're mentally-ill. they come from broken homes. they're in the care of the state. they're dirty. they're poor. they're odd. they're behind at school and badly-behaved in the classroom. they do things which allow their abuse to be dismissed as something they brought upon themselves - they speak or dress in certain ways, they pose provocatively in pictures and post them on the internet, they are known to be sexually active outside of the context of their abuse, they lie about being over the age of consent, they engage in sexual behaviour with an adult abuser in a way which appears [even though it isn't, and there's never a circumstance in which it will be] to be consensual or for their own personal gain, they are flattered by the attention they receive from someone who is important or attractive grooming them, they have complicated - and not always wholly negative - feelings towards their abusers.

and they are still - unequivocally - victims, and what happens to them is still - unequivocally - abuse.

tom riddle is an unsympathetic victim - not only of any potential abuse, but also of the horrors of his life which are explicit on the canon page: that he is raised in an orphanage; that he is grieving; that he knows nothing about his family; that he is thought to be mad.

the absence of any institutional response to his childhood experiences - dumbledore, by his own admission, discloses nothing about riddle to his fellow teachers - is a flaw repeated again and again in the worldbuilding of the harry potter series.

hogwarts - and the wizarding [and muggle] state more broadly - doesn't intervene in any case of neglect or abuse, from harry to snape to voldemort's own parents. the series' individualistic morality means that we aren't supposed to interrogate these collective failings. and the series' black-and-white view of good and evil - and its general belief that violence is fine if the person it happens to "deserves" it - means that it has no interest in examining the ways that poverty, isolation, and neglect are risk factors; that straightforwardly unpleasant people can still be victims; that victims can go on to become perpetrators without their victimhood ceasing to matter; and that the abuse of children usually takes place not in silence and secrecy, concealed in ways which make it fine for adults not to notice it and not to intervene, but in plain sight.

this is knowledge it never hurts to refresh. thinking about lord voldemort's childhood might be an usual way of doing so... but it is an effective one nonetheless...

#asks answered #asenora meta #tom riddle #lord voldemort #if wizards had the concept of safeguarding it would be a game changer...

571 notes · View notes

onlinedolly · 22 days ago

Text

SAVIOR COMPLEX 2

au where leon has a pretty little captive he thinks he’s saved

cw: manipulative leon, drug use, p in mouth, slight degradation, mentions of cum, obsessive leon, i think dats it folks

an: not proof read guys don’t kill me…..also this is dark/dd:dne content if you don’t like any of the tags above mentioned please do not partake in my content. as always MDNI!

Leon in his mind, was a perfect, downright good man. He was the star of his force, helped countless people a day, and saved you. Leon had swooped down and rescued you as if you were a baby bird with a clipped wing (at least that’s how he looked at it). And since then, the past four months in his home, Leon had never been so far on cloud nine.

People at work noticed, pushing into him and laughing asking if he had a woman at home that finally got that chip off his shoulder. And Leon would laugh and retort that he had ‘something like that.’

You were the definition of perfect, doe eyed and sweet waiting for him the waltz through the door like he always did and wrap you up in a big hug. It’d been a little over a few weeks since he let you free roam the home, trusting you since the outbursts had died down due to the pills he had you on.

When Leon got home that evening you were waiting by the door per usual as you heard the multiple locks turn. He came through the door smiling when he saw your tinier frame.

“Today was rough baby, come give me a hug, hm?” He spoke, holding his arms out as you wrapped yourself around him.

“Bet it was,” You spoke back, pliant and kind as ever, “I made dinner.” Leon could smell it then, the waft of spices flowing into the entry way.

“What a good, sweet, thing.” He smiled at you, pressing a kiss to the top of your head.

Dinner went like it usually did, with Leon filling your head with all of the gruesome details of the day. “Bet you’re glad you’re here, yeah?” He always asked after he was finished which caused you to nod your head eagerly.

You were a kind thing, he knows he says that a lot, but it’s true. Always had dinner on the table, listened to him so eagerly as he talked and winched when he told you about the death he witnessed at work. And maybe, okay, Leon stretched the truth a bit. A majority of his day was actually filled with paper work and a minor domestic case that came down to a misunderstanding, but you didn’t need to know that.

After dinner, like always, like a good girl, you open your mouth wide as Leon places the pills onto your tongue, shoving his fingers into the back of your throat slightly making you gag. You swallow them dry before looking up at him with a hazy love filled look. He grabs your face between his big hand, leaning down and pressing a kiss to your glossy lips.

“Why don’t we watch a movie, yeah? You pick tonight.” He spoke when he pulled away, running his fingers through your hair.

Like a good girl you nod eagerly pulling him upstairs into his bedroom (where you always ‘watched movies’), Leon laughing and following along.

Once up to his room you put a movie on, one Leon didn’t particularly care about, as you climb into the bed next to him, curling up. He smiles, places his hand around your hip and he pretends to listen to whatever nonsense was playing on the screen. His big hand made circles into your hip causing you to mewl under his touch.

“Missed you so much today sweet girl,” He spoke, gripping your hip a little tighter as you let out a shiver at his touch.

“Missed you,” You spoke dismissively, too intrigued on the movie in front of you.

“Sounds like you didn’t miss me too bad,” Leon spoke, referring to the way you were more inclined to watch the movie then talk to the man who saved you.

You gasp, “I missed you terribly, you gotta believe me.” You spoke out, looking up at him with glossy eyes. So well trained, he thought to himself. He loved the way you shook like a dog at the slightest inclination that Leon seemed upset.

“Why don’t you show me how much you missed me?” He spoke, pulling you closer to him by your hip. You knew what that meant, what Leon wanted when he asked that question, and before Leon could repeat himself you had his belt buckle in your hand.

“What a dirty thing,” Leon degraded, leaning back in the bed as you fumbled around with his belt. After a few moments you moved on to his pants, letting him lift himself up as you worked them down his legs. His cock sprung out, hot and angry as you immediately took it into your hands.

“Shit, not that hard baby, tryin’ to kill your old man or somethin?” He speaks running his fingers through your hair and pulling. You ease up on your touch, stroking him slowly at first until he quips an eyebrow at you causing you to pick your pace up.

“God—“ He groans, pulling harder on your hair as you wince in pain, “Feels so fucking good, baby, put your mouth on it. Don’t leave me hangin’.” He speaks out, tapping your jaw as you open your mouth and place your glossy lips around his tip. “That’s more like it, baby. *Good.*” He groans out, running his hand down your neck and back and you begin bobbing yourself up and down on his cock.

You choke a bit, still a little inexperienced, as you attempt to take his full length. Leon was big and thick, making it hard to fully take him down your throat. Leon’s a moaning mess underneath you as you bob your head up and down on his cock, hollowing your cheeks out which earns a deep groan from him.

Leon, unlike his words was a rough man, groping your tits and pulling your hair as he begins to rock his hips into your mouth, laughing a bit as you gag around his cock.

“Sweet thing, can barely take it all, hm?” He pushes further into your mouth as he says it, pushing past the ring in the back of your throat making you sob. You feel like you’re going to throw up and pass out all at once, but oh so determined you still sucked him down greedily, massaging his balls in your small soft hands.

Leon had never felt so blessed to have a thing like you as he shoves your head down, his bush tickling your nose. He was going to cum soon, you could feel it in the way his hips stuttered, his pace into your mouth quickening and becoming sloppier.

When he cums he pushes your head all the way down and you feel the liquid spurt down your throat as you choke and cry out. You’re forced to swallow like always, as Leon smushes your face down against his pelvic bone.

“That’s it baby, take it all like a good girl,” He growls out.

Once done he yanks your head up by your hair roughly and you whine as he grabs your face with a big hand, “Betcha your so glad I took you in, hm? Where else you gunna get dick like me babydoll?”

Your voice is hoarse and comes out as barely a whisper as you speak out, “N-nowhere sir.” You whine out, falling into his body in exhaustion as he lets go of your head, wrapping his big arms around you.

“I’m the best thing that’s ever happened to you,” He whispers as he places a kiss to the crown of your head.

“The bestest.” You whisper back, falling fast asleep into Leon’s arms.

Leon was a downright, honest-to-good man, a star in his force, and the man who picked you up and saved you.

#leon kennedy #tw.dark content #leon kennedy x reader #ೃ mars writes !#resident evil #leon kennedy smut #dead dove do not eat

199 notes · View notes

daceydeath · 3 months ago

Text

Try Again?

Pairing: Chan x F Reader Word Count: 2K Genre: Hurt/Comfort Warnings: Swearing

A part two of Why

You needed time to think the scandal was growing and you needed to be sure that you believed Chan or whether you should walk away for good

It had been almost twenty four hours since you had asked Chis to leave your apartment and the first seven, you predicted of many, bouquets of flowers had already arrived at your door. Although you conceded not all of them were from him, one had been from Felix, you were still not sure what to do. You knew about articles on Dispatch titled "Stray Kids Bang Chan Caught Kissing Mystery Woman" and "Stray Kids Bang Chan Takes Advantage of Fan". There were dozens of smaller articles of Chan with the whore sitting on his lap and all of them made your heart break a little more. You believed him but somewhere in the back of your mind you knew that there was always a chance he was lying to you to keep what he already had from slipping through his fingers.

Your phone rang for the twenty eighth time only this time it wasn't Chan or his manager it was Changbin and you knew at least he would tell you the truth, probably. There was little for him to lose, you would remain friends with the other guys whatever happened, you just wouldn't be able to see Chan again. Ever.

"I'm so sorry we didn't stop her" Changbin blurted loudly as soon as you answered the call "Shit we knew she was going to cause a problem as soon as Hyunjin spotted her following us".

"Bin, start from the beginning" you mumbled your voice scratchy from crying. You felt too listless to bother trying to piece information together.

"Hyunjin spotted her while we were filming and she seemed to be following us, when we finished and went out to the bar she popped up again and we knew she was going to cause some kind of issue, the psycho ones always do. But none of us guessed she was going to launch herself at Chan hyung and try to kiss him let alone sit in his lap. She was on him for like 15 seconds before security grabbed her and kicked her out" Changbin prattled before taking his first breath, you understood now why he was a rapper with the ability to speak so clearly but almost so fast you couldn't follow him.

"You were drunk Bin, Chan told me you all were" you sighed sitting on the floor in your lounge unable to even bring yourself to sit on the couch you had been sitting on when he had told you.

"Not that drunk! sure we were all a bit worse for wear but not so much that we didn't panic the moment she jumped hyung" he defended knowing that you knew he rarely got plastered unless he was somewhere that Stay wouldn't see him.

"So a sasaeng followed you around all day and then to the bar and you all did nothing until she decided to sit in Chan's lap and try to kiss him? That's the story you are going with?" you sniffled you had already run out of tears so an almost miserable apathy was all you could manage at that point.

"I'm not lying to you" Changbin's pretty much shouted down the phone frustration evident in his voice "Fuck I have no stake in what happens between you and hyung but I would prefer than neither of you get hurt by bullshit that was caused by someone else".

You stayed silent, your shaky breath probably the only thing he could hear as the moments dragged on before you hung up adding him to the growing list of people you were blocking as the day wore on. You were too tired to deal with this now and no matter what anyone thought you had to protect yourself first.

Another two days passed and another two of the boys had joined your blocked list for not getting the message and blowing up your phone, the list now stood at four members and three managers, you had just hoped that the others would get the hint and either contact you sparingly or just leave you alone until you were ready to deal with it. The articles kept coming, the whore had been sure to give out as much information as she could making the story grow exponentially and Stay were getting angry that the members were being crucified with no evidence to back the claims up. You were now seeing the situation for what it was and to quote Changbin it was just 'bullshit'.

"Holy shit bug are you ok? Everyone is so worried since you just disappeared" Felix asked as he stepped into your apartment with Hyunjin and Minho on his heels. You had invited them over so you could ask them exactly what happened and how Chan was doing, hoping you could finally either tell him that you believed him or to never contact you again.

"I'm better, I just needed some time" you smiled, accepting his tight hug and letting them sit where they wanted "Can I get you anything?".

"No, we brought you coffee though, to perhaps help" Minho offered, placing an iced latte down on your coffee table.

"Thanks Min" you smiled as genuinely as you could. All of the members had been so kind to you after they met you and found out you were with Chan and Minho was no exception to that even though it took him longer to come around.

"Three shots with vanilla syrup" he smiled in return and waited for you to sit down.

"I didn't want to call you and tell you over the phone" Hyunjin started nervously "I wanted to be able to tell you the truth and you be able to see it".

"That's more than I deserve Hyunnie, I've been quite the bitch over the past few days" you felt the skin of your face burning in shame at your admission.

"You were hurt, you had every right to feel what you were feeling" Felix interjected his normally cheerful bright smile replaced with a small shy one.

"We had been filming a Skz Talker" Hyunjin sighed watching you take a sip of the coffee "This girl was following us, but always off camera and only when we were in public, I noticed her after one of the managers was grumbling about her. She seemed fairly harmless just taking pictures and filming us, which isn't as bad as some of the shit they do, so I ignored her".

"Hyunjin pointed her out to a couple of us so I saw her and I'm pretty sure Seung and Innie did too but I'm not totally sure. But she honestly didn't seem as bad as some of the others do so we were probably not cautious enough about her which is on all of us, the managers included" Minho frowned, his eyes sadder than you had seen them in a while.

"When we went to dinner I don't think she was there and then the little bar we went to after that was so small there can't have been more than twenty other people in, including the staff" Felix added cautiously "but granted I hadn't seen her until it happened".

"We had a few drinks, Channie hyung was tipsy and barely at that, and she just appeared and wandered over like she was a friend. He didn't even see her until he sat on him and he was too stunned to even do anything about it, when he didn't react she grabbed his shirt and kissed him which he shut down immediately" Hyunjin continued slowly letting the information sink in. "He just about shoved her to the floor though, once we all yelled and the managers grabbed her Chan hyung just started cursing her out for being a psycho and disgusting, I think Minho hyung called her an whore because he is savage when he wants to be"

"An attention seeking whore but yeah semantics really" Minho confirmed, shrugging casually.

"We were all shocked and Channie hyung just broke down after it all happened and kept saying he needed to see you, he had to tell you but by the time we got back into Seoul and he got here it had already become a scandal" Felix pouted looking like he was the one who had messed up.

"Thank you all for telling me" you smiled halfheartedly, sipping your coffee again.

"Have you eaten today?" Minho asked seriously, looking at you sympathetically.

"I'll order something for dinner in a little while" you nodded your body feeling drained "I promise".

"Are you going to talk to hyung? He's losing his mind over this, not even the rumors and bad press over you not talking to him" Felix questioned as sweetly as he could.

"I'll call him" you again nodded as they all got up to leave, letting you walk them to the door.

"I swear that's the truth" Hyunjin took your hand to squeeze it "Hyung would rather give up his career than lose you".

"I would never allow that Hyunnie" you squeezed his hand back before they walked out and you shut the door behind them. You knew they hadn't lied to you and you also knew that Chan probably hadn't eaten or slept since it happened which made you feel so guilty that you felt your throat tighten. Taking a deep breath you unblocked his number and waited to see if anything happened, opening your food app you ordered something to arrive in an hour knowing that you would forget about it otherwise. Five minutes after the boys left your phone rang, Chan's picture filling your screen and making your heart clench.

"Baby girl?" He whispered his voice croaky "Baby girl please talk to me".

"Hi Channie" you answered him, your voice shaking.

"Oh shit, baby girl I'm so sorry. I've missed you so much and I'm sorry I fucked everything up and broke your heart but I'll do anything, absolutely anything to get another chance. Please. I love you so fucking much I can't breathe without you". He rambled, his voice turning thick as you imagined tears springing into his eyes.

"Channie, you don't need another chance, you didn't lose the first chance" you explained "I spoke to Hyunjin he told me everything and I'm so sorry I doubted you. I should have known you would never do that to me. I should have trusted you more but I was so scared that you might not love me anymore and I already knew you were too good for me so.... I'm sorry Channie".

"No, no, no you have nothing to be sorry for" Chan interrupted "I'm coming round I don't want this conversation to be over the phone. Is that ok?"

"The doors open Channie" you smiled as he hung up and you imagined him rushing around to get to your apartment.

When he arrived you almost cried looking at how tired and wrecked he looked, heavy bags under his eyes, his hair a mess and his cheeks pale. He didn't say a word, just pulled you into his arms holding you so tight that you thought he might not let you go again.

"I love you, I'll leave Stray Kids, I'll quit music, I'll announce we're together whatever you want me to do to prove I mean it" he breathed into your hair his lips pressing a kiss to the crown of your head.

"You will do none of those things Channie" you softly protested your voice muffled against his chest "But maybe get more security to stop the insane people getting so close to you?".

"I will definitely do that baby girl" he sighed, his hold on you relaxing slightly "can we try this again?".

"We never broke up Channie I just needed some time, I didn't leave you I just needed space" you whispered "I know I was a bitch and went about it the wrong way. I should have told you what I needed instead of just shutting you out but I still love you very much".

Chan let go of you tilting your face to look at him, his smile so bright that it was almost blinding before he crashed his lips into yours, the emotion behind the kiss a promise that it would never happen again, that his heart and soul belonged to you. Melting against him you knew you would never not trust him again you loved Chan and that was all that mattered.

a/n: I know this took me like a year to finish but I hope you enjoy it all the same. Your likes, comments, reblogs and support means everything to me and I adore you all xx

Taglist (open): @christopher-bangnaldoskzz @armystay89 @damnyouficc @roamingpolar

@tara-skyhold @bakedlilgoonie @krishastumblernow @mrsseals16 @fawnpeaks

@leeknowinggg @tanzen-ist-gold @uno7 @ocean-dreamer-sky-chaser

230 notes · View notes

bindibites · 2 months ago

Text

Its done!!! Bunch of rambles and stuff under the cut :) (its long, but I hope you guys enjoy!!!)

-> General Stuff Petra is built like a rectangle with enough muscle to make you experience regret swifter than you may have ever thought you could.

Rips in her clothes aren't super uncommon and she isn't usually super quick to mend them unless its basically ruining the garments. Carabiner. This woman is GAY. If you don't know the full meaning go look for it :) Easy attachment to weapons and tools, Miss Butter is probably akin to a prized possession everything considered; With as much as she's used having mending was a must, but truth be told she's probably about as kitted out as you'd expect end-game diamond gear to be. That sword is never going anywhere if Petra can help it. Especially after the stint with Stella basically stealing her. She has a lot of scars, from a lot of different sources between smaller bumps and scrapes, explosions, enemies... the Wither Storm. Petra's wither sickness in particular was almost deadly, and the damage it'd done to her body never fully went away. The veins in her arm remained discolored around the scar, and the arm is mildly weaker than it would've been pre-withered though through steady use is basically back to being good as new. Petra's lungs also never fully recovered, a mild chronic cough left in its wake, though gets worse whenever Petra is sick and her body is weak again. Speaking of... -> Wither (Sickness) Wither typically enters the body through a physical wound and spreads through the circulatory system. Affecting the blood, it attacks and weakens the inflicteds organs and continues to be spread further by the heart simply doing its job. Variant Two is caused by contact to the Wither Storm (See: What happened to Gabriel.) The wither storm is not the only way to get sick with wither, but is the worst and long lasting. From weakest to strongest: Wither roses - Wither Skeletons - The Wither - Wither Storm. Injuries from all but the Wither Storm will eventually run their course as it doesn't have a consistent source to keep pulling from; thanks to its use of the command block, this does not apply to the Wither Storm. Wither acts similarly to being poisoned, though it acts slower, its side effects and danger are far worse, and dying cannot be ruled out of possibilities even for the weakest source of it. Untreated wither will kill the inflicted if they become too weak before the body can get it out of its system. -> Relationships Generally Petra is very much a provider, she cares intensely for people she's close to and enjoys doing acts of service for them. Her relationships mean a lot to her, and it tends to lead to her putting all of herself into the people she cares about; sometimes for better or for worse. Lukas and Petra have been friends for awhile, well before either of them knew about Jesse and his friends. While not exactly childhood friends, they've known each other long enough to know each other and certainly act the part.

Petra and Stella didn't always have a strained relationship, in fact when they'd first gotten to know each other things were great. Stella respected Petra's capabilities, found her affinity for exploration and her skill in combat to be amazing. Though over time, it became less admiration and more of manipulation, Petra was an easy source of loot Stella both couldn't and didn't want to get on her own... and who better to turn to than the explorer who loved her. Things did not end on good terms between the two, and ended very bitterly given even after Petra gave her another chance she was subjected to getting tricked into doing work all over again. (S2) Petra has a fond admiration towards Olivia, though believing at most that the girl could use a bit more guts and trust in her own abilities; after all she's done things most of the rest of the group couldn't even with all the time in the world! Really a brains and brawn type situation, and the two often bounce off of each other a bit. Olivia appreciates having the company, and someone who even if she doesn't fully understand whats going on is intent to help get the materials to make it possible if need-be, in return Petra has been able to pick up bits of knowledge, the way redstone works at least in its bare minimum and some of the internals of more machinery in Redstonia. ...While the she might never fully utilize that knowledge, it makes Olivia happy to have someone else in the group be attentive and care about what makes her happy. Petra and Jesse have also been very close, though it did take some time for her to warm up to the way Jesse was so... enthusiastic to even be recognized by her sometimes. Though, through everything the two know they can rely on one another to have each others back. Though neither of them could ever see each other romantically, it's still an undeniable how fundamentally close they'd become. It's definitely more than just a friendship, but neither of them could probably concisely tell you anything about their relationship on a level past "Well, we aren't dating..." Even in light of the others having different responsibilities to tend to, Jesse was still there; The adventures didn't have to end, and they didn't, and Petra wasn't alone because of Jesse's willingness to go with her on whatever excursion she needed to, or wanted to. - If you read all of this ur a real one... three thousand wither storms upon you as thanks 💜

#mcsm #minecraft story mode #mcsm fanart #mcsm headcanons #mcsm petra #mcsm olivia #mcsm jesse #mscm lukas #mcsm stella #my art #so much rambling #some of this might not make sense it has so little to go behind it but i do not care #olitra #petrivia #platonic jetra

206 notes · View notes

reareaotaku · 1 year ago

Text

You Stupid Bitch!

Summary: Billy can't be Ghostface, you just won't accept the truth, and neither will he. Why throw away everything you both have over a few dead bodies? Characters: Yandere! Billy Loomis x Reader Tw: Gaslighting & Manipulation

The wind was blowing harsher than it normally did or maybe it was the anticipation. You felt Billy's lean, slick hand graze up your back as he softly kisses your neck. You pull back a little, causing him to glare at you, but he quickly shakes it off.

He decides to lay his head on your neck, while his hand intertwines with yours. You can feel his gaze, but you decide not to give him the satisfaction. You're scared of him and you know he can sense it. He smells the fear reeking off of you like smoke.

Randy was talking about something, but you weren't listening to him. You were too busy thinking about the man that was breathing down your neck.

"Right Y/n?"

You snap out of your head and look up at Randy, who was looking at you, waiting on you to respond. "Uh, Yeah... Sure." You shiver when feeling Billy's icy breath on your neck; It makes your hair stand.

"So, you think Friday the 13th is better than Nightmare on Elm Street?"

"Sure-"

"You think some Mommy's Boy who comes out when people are fucking is better than a man who kills you in his dreams?"

"Isn't Freddy a Pedophile, though? Isn't that why he was burned?"

Randy rolls his eyes, "It's a horror movie, they're all bad."

"Well, Jason drowned in the lake because the counselors were to busy fucking instead of watching the kids-"

"Oh please, cry me a river. Some kids bully you, so you should go after innocent people?" Randy sits down close to you, causing Billy to push himself against you and look over at Randy, while still leaning on your shoulder.

"Why do you have such a hard on for Freddy?"

Randy turns towards Sidney, shaking his head, "I do not have a hard on. But how can anyone think Jason is better than Freddy?"

"I mean I like the Nightmare on Elm Street movies better than Friday the 13th, but when it comes to the characters as people, I'd prefer Jason." You then bite your lip, "Expect Johnny Depp in the first movie. He looks mmmm.... so good-"

You feel a squeeze on your waist and you straighten up.

"But not as good as you, Billy. No one will ever look as good as you"

You hear a chuckle and a sarcastic laugh. Billy glare tightens on Randy.

"Something funny?"

"No," Randy quickly shakes his head. "Nothing at all."

-----

"Why are you so stressed?"

"I'm not stressed-"

Billy pushes near your scapula and a pop sounds in your ear. You groan, though before you can say anything, Billy slowly engraves his fingers into the knot and slowly rubbing back and forth. He presses down firmly and starts making circle motions with the tips.

"What's got you so worked up?"

"N-n-it's nothing."

He lifts up your hair, kissing your neck, "You seem... scared. Are you scared of me, Baby?"

"Should I be?" You question, not looking at him.

He caresses your cheek, sliding his thumb gently against you. "I would never hurt you."

"I'd like to believe that," You mumble to yourself, but he heard you.

"You think I'd hurt you?" He lets go of you and turns you around, caressing your face, "Why would I do that? Do you think I'm some kind of killer? Because, I'm no killer, Y/n. Maybe... Just maybe, people keep placing things in your mind, making you believe I killed people-"

"No one told me anything." You grab his hand as he glares at you.

"Y/n, I'm not a killer. You're painting me as some villain." He pulls his hand out of your grasp and taps your forehead. "I'm not a villain Y/n."

"Okay."

His brows frown, "Okay? That's all?"

"Yeah." You shrug, "There's nothing else to say. If you say you're not a killer, then I believe you," You walk past him and back to your room as he watches you like a hawk.

#yandere scream #scream x reader #billy loomis #billy loomis x reader #billy x reader #billy loomis x you #billy loomis imagine #yandere x reader #yandere billy loomis #yandere billy x reader #yandere billy loomis x reader #yandere imagines

1K notes · View notes

thefallennightmare · 5 months ago

Text

Just Pretend-Twenty Seven

*gif created by me. feel free to use, simply give credit*

Parings: Noah Sebastian x Musician! Reader

Warnings/Tropes: language, angst, fluff, smut, star-crossed lovers, right person/wrong time, cheating, talks of mental abuse, talks of death, depressive thoughts.

Summary: “I can wait for years, heaven knows I’m not getting over you.” A story about two star-crossed lovers, that always find their way back because their souls are entwined. The universe desperately attempts to bring them together, no matter what the cost.

Authors Note: I apologize for the trauma I will cause with this chapter. But I promise that it's meant to happen this way. The light might be flickering now but soon, it will shine brighter than ever.

Also, I know I teased sweet, sweet, smut, but time got away from me so I will save it for the next chapter! Tumblr is being stupid and only allowing me to tag 50 people on a post so I might have to take some of these tags and add them in a comment, so if for some reason you don't see your tag, don't fret! It is added in the comments. As always, enjoy my loves, and thank you for sticking with me!

Tags[CLOSED]: @blueskylinesx @missduffsblog @hayleylatour @sleepyomens @loeytuan98 @artificialbreezy @marvelousmal @bngurngheart @lma1986 @dsireland86 @wild-child-7747 @calleyx13 @illmakeyousaywow @jaded-and-hollow-souls @exitwoundsx @shayzillaaaa @badomensls @princesspeach-00 @shadowseve @collective-heartbreak @klutzy-kay24 @sorrowsofsilence @sweetlittlekitsune @shilohrosechicken @itsafullmoon @toospooktocute @niicoleleigh @thatchickwiththecamera @hoe-for-daddywise @whenthesummerdies @cookiesupplier @concreteemo @thisbicc @sammyjoeee @joe9cool @ozwriterchick @teenblues @malice-ov-mercy @krisslee18 @xxkittenkissesxx @happi-goth @embracethereaper42 @softvgold @cncohshit @heyyoplayer @rain-down-on-me @bloody-delusion-expert @respectfulrebel @reader13000 @koskeepsake @malerieee @cheyyyyr @myownthoughts12 @noahsbong @laurpartyprogram @cloudykoookie @jessiskyee @a1ex-ba1ex @sideeyenoah @emzandthevoid @badomensls @bellaboo967 @waake-mee-up @rxdlstgn @anthemheatwave @lobolocaamo @cncohshit @amelia-acero @karenfranco @collidewiththesavannah @xserenax-13 @bleachampion @thepastelfae @supersquirrel1996 @madomens @themodern-daywednesday @oxythoughtin7715

READER

People once believed that when someone dies, a crow carries their soul to the land of the dead.

That’s complete bullshit.

The noise around me was muted, and uninteresting, as my eyes stared daggers into the burial plot at my feet. It was all wrong, everything about this day was wrong. This entire moment was a facade of what people always believed happened after death. My dad wasn’t up in the sky watching me with a proud smile on his face.

His body was in the ground beneath my feet.

There was an empty hole in my heart, caving in with every pathetic attempt from the ones around in an effort to comfort me. It was a feign response due to what happened. No one here knew me or my father. Some of these people I hadn’t seen in years while the others I never met, acquaintances of my father’s while he lived here in Japan. They were compelled by the crosses on their necks because they were worried about what came next for them. They were all liars.

My dad included.

He lied to me for over a year. He hid his cancer from everyone. He suffered in silence and in pain.

Did I not matter to him? Was I not important enough for him to tell me the truth? Did he even love me?

When I arrived in Japan four days ago, Noah and I immediately went to the hospital where my dad died to speak with the doctors. According to them, my dad had been diagnosed with lung cancer almost two years ago but they were hopeful because they caught it early on. He even beat it with rigorous treatments and was feeling good; alive.

Yet, five weeks ago the cancer came back, more aggressive than before and this time my dad opted out of treatments. He told his doctors he was done fighting and wanted to go naturally. He had all of his funeral plans already set in motion, casket and all.

The real kicker about my dad’s cancer? He never smoked a day in his life and he was one of the healthiest persons I know.

You knew.

When the hospital first told me what happened, I didn’t believe them. There was no way my father was sick and didn’t tell me. I was in a state of denial for hours after the news, I sat in the hospital waiting room for my dad to walk through those doors to tell me everything was alright and it was just a normal check up.

Noah had to force me out of the chair after three hours of waiting for a ghost.

“Y/N, he’s not coming back,” Noah’s eyes shined with his tears as he lifted me up from my seated position. “I’m sorry, angel. But we can’t keep sitting here.”

I choked on a breath causing Noah to turn his head towards me but I refused to meet his gaze knowing that if I did, all of my strong reserve would crumble the second I drank in those almond eyes. Instead, I burned all of my hate down at the open grave, desperately wishing the dirt would cover the oak box that was six feet deep. He cheated death before but now it was real.

My dad was buried in a box because the cancer couldn’t stop.

“Would his daughter like to say a few words?”

Noah shifted beside me, the softest of breezes we felt for the first time all afternoon blowing through his unkempt hair and through the muted feeling coursing through me, I felt his fingers link with mine.

“We can keep going,” he answered for me.

I didn’t say a word all morning while getting ready for my dad’s funeral. I was in a catatonic state of numbness in a way to mentally prepare myself. It wasn’t until Noah and I were sitting in the rental car outside of the cemetery as we waited for the funeral home to arrive with my dad’s body that I finally spoke.

“Please don’t make me say anything today. He won’t be able to hear me,” I kept my eyes trained hard outside of the window, not bothering to glance towards Noah who sat in the driver's seat.

His tattooed fingers wrapped around my wrist. “Whatever you want, angel.”

As the funeral continued on, I felt Noah’s strong arms wrap around my shoulder and pulled me into his warm chest. The dress I wore did nothing to keep the warmth inside of me with the short sleeves even after Noah asked me three times before we left this morning if I wanted a jacket.

“Please take all the time you need to say your goodbyes,” the man from the funeral home said. “Miss. Y/L/N, is there somewhere you would like everyone to meet you for the wake?”

Right, the wake. Another name for an after party where you’re supposed to celebrate the life the deceased lived.

Or as I called it, another bullshit reason for people to act like they knew my dad.

Chase, who stood on the other side of me, cleared his throat. “Feel free to head on home after this. We decided not to have a wake.”

A round of gasps rose from the group of people standing around the now filling grave. “Dear, you need to have a wake! It’s what your father would want!”

My head snapped up towards the older woman who hid beneath an excessively large hat. I think she was in one of my fathers book clubs. Through the bloodshot eyes, I sliced her in half with my gaze and my throat burned as I tried not to cry.

“You have no idea what my dad would have wanted,” I snapped.

Noah hushed me by dragging his lips into my hairline and running a hand up and down my arm.

“It’s alright, angel. Just breathe.”

Malcolm gave an apologetic smile to everyone before bidding them all a goodbye with a curt nod. Slowly, everyone who didn’t matter dispersed and I was left with the ones that did.

Noah continued to hold me to his chest as the sobs began to fall through my lips, and I grasped onto his jacket to find some sort of anchor.

Chase and Malcolm solemnly stood on my right with their hands deep in their pockets. Besides me, they were the only other ones here that actually knew my dad. He loved Chase and Malcolm like they were his own sons so I knew they were hurting deep down as well.

Jesse, Matt, Faye, and Michael all stood on the other end of the grave. I could feel their looks of sorrow as it bounced from the filled grave back to me.

Jolly, Astrid, Folio, and Nicholas were behind me, closing ranks almost in a way to shield me from any other bad thing that threatened my life.

Since it was so last minute, some of the rest of the crew couldn’t fly out but I didn’t hold it against them. It was unknown how long we would be here for so between Tay, Bryan, and Davis they all offered to take turns with watching Salem.

“Can heaven fall to earth?” I cried into Noah’s shirt. “I want to feel it come down. I need him.”

Noah let out a shaky breath, resting his chin on top of my head as he rocked me slowly. He didn’t say anything for a long moment, just let me stain his shirt with my tears, and it wasn’t until I saw Chase’s striking blue eyes that I realized the sun had set and the moon was starting to crest over the hills, gray lights breaking through the cherry blossom trees.

“I don’t want to rush you, sweets,” he gave me a somber smile. “But I think they’re going to close the gates soon.”

Blinking rapidly, I looked around at all my friends; my family. They dropped everything to be here for me and most of them never met my dad. However my heart was too broken to care. At that moment, I wanted to be alone with my dad. I didn’t even want Noah. I tried to push him away the first few days but he refused, he wouldn’t let me be alone during this.

While everyone went back to their hotel rooms, we would be going back to my dad’s house again. His scent still lingered in the aged walls and I swore the first few nights we slept in the guest room, I could hear his footsteps in the hallway. I expected to see him sitting in the old and faded green reading chair in the corner of the living room with either a book or the paper in his lap. Instead I woke up to an empty house.

Well, almost empty.

“Did you want a few minutes alone?” Noah asked.

Finally looking up at him through the tears, I shook my head. “Can we please go back?”

His face was contorted with his own pain yet still managed to give me that smile I loved. “Anything you want, angel.”

While they all conversed about possibly meeting up for breakfast in the morning, my mind was elsewhere. All of my thoughts were in the dark recesses of my mind and I let them take me further and further. I didn’t want to find a way out.

I wanted to be with my dad.

With Noah’s gentle tug on my shoulder, I let him lead me back towards the rental car, still in a state of dissociation. I didn’t even realize he helped me into the seat, buckled my seat belt, and drove off from the cemetery until we were minutes away from my dads place.

“Y/N?”

Feeling like it weighed like a bag of rocks, I raised my head up from staring at my dry knuckles and over towards the concerning eyes of Noah.

“Hm?”

Words couldn’t even form on my tongue. I was too far deep in my grief and the idea of talking was too much of a task.

“Are you hungry? I can stop by that ramen place, if you want.”

Noah flicked his eyes back on the road as he sat straight up against the seat but I knew with the way his jaw ticked, something was weighing heavily on him. It wasn't a secret that he was keeping how he felt with everything to himself and the little voice inside my brain was screaming at me to talk with him, work out how both of us were feeling.

Instead, I gave him a very weak shrug before turning to look out the window, the scenery whipping past us. It was all a blur of colors, unimaginative and unappealing. When we arrived back to my dad’s place, I barely gave Noah a smile as he opened the door for me and when I stepped into the darkness of the somewhat empty home, I made a beeline towards the guest bedroom on the far end of the hallway, not bothering to look at the envelope with my name on it on the kitchen counter or the 10lbs fluff ball that happily wagged its tail at my feet when he saw us.

Like I’d done the last four days, I locked myself inside of the guest room and buried myself underneath the mounds of blankets. There was a lot of work to get done with packing up my dad’s place but it didn’t matter to me. Nothing mattered anymore. The only thing that did was rotting in the earth's soil.

NOAH

"Angel?" I called out into the cold darkness.

Stepping into the now familiar house, I shook the chilled rain from my jacket and hung it up on the hook next to the door. The aged wood of the floor creaked beneath my feet as I padded across it, after kicking off my shoes. There was a faint glow emanating from the lamp in the living room, casting my surroundings in a muted yellow as I set down the takeout bag on the counter.

Not like she would eat. She hasn't eaten anything in days.

The two envelopes had sat in the same spot on the kitchen counter since we first arrived eight days ago; untouched. One with Y/N’s name and one with mine. She refused to touch it or even look at it because she knew what it was.

A letter from her dad.

I didn’t force her to read it knowing she needed the time to accept everything beforehand. Yet deep down, I was so afraid that the walls Y/N had made in her mind had locked her in. We weren’t okay but for now, I needed to try my best to just pretend.

Jingling tags caught my attention and I bent low at the knees just as Kuma met me halfway. He was Y/N’s dad’s three month old Akita puppy. From when he died to when we arrived three days later, one of his friends had been taking care of the dog but I offered to take over in Kuma’s care.

Y/N wanted nothing to do with him.

“We’ll take him to the shelter before we leave.”

“Hey bud,” I smiled while scratching behind his ears. “Did you get dinner yet?”

Kuma let out a bark, quiet and squeaky, and he shook out his fur. He was all black with a white spot around one eye and on one paw.

After filling up his bowl with food and water, I brushed my hands on the back of my dress slacks and let out a long breath. Earlier today, Y/N had a meeting with some lawyers to figure out her dad’s estate and what to do with the rest of his money. It was stated in his will that she had the final say on what to do with his things and that she was entitled to all of his savings. Y/N was never hurting financially since Hollow Souls was thriving but now with the extra money, she’d be able to live comfortably without worry. Thankfully in the divorce, it was made clear that her mom would not get a cent of her dads money when he passed.

Y/N had yet to decide what she wanted to do with all of her fathers things. As soon as we both arrived back earlier, she yet again locked herself in the guest room.

The house, while it was unfamiliar at first, I knew that the bones of the structure told a story; one of a man that loved his daughter very much and wished he was able to say goodbye. My socks slid against the floor as I followed the soft tune of music from the guest bedroom, passing the one room that had remained shut since we arrived a week ago; her refusing to open it.

Her dad’s bedroom.

"Y/N?" I tried again, hoping now that I was closer to the bedroom she'd be able to hear me. "I brought some ramen from the place down the road. Your favorite."

The only thing I heard was the same tune of music, louder now.

"I'm sorry I can't get out of bed. I'm sorry that my head’s always a mess."

Joe. His song, I’m sorry. I’m trying, was one of her favorites.

Y/N had been playing the same nothing, nowhere song the entire afternoon, drowning in his melodies when I left her earlier after our disagreement. I knew she wasn't in the right headspace with what she tried so I couldn't hold it against her. But there was no way I could do what she asked.

Not now.

"Noah, please," her hands reached for my shirt, trying to pry it away from my skin. "I just need five minutes."

"Y/N," I tenderly held onto her wrists, halting her. "You're not in the right mind for this."

She wrenched her hands from my grip and knelt on the bed, grasping the waistband of my dress pants, and began pulling them down. I fought against her as her hand slipped between my briefs and took a hold of my cock, squeezing it.

"Make me forget this pain, Noah. Please."

Y/N attacked my lips with hers and for a brief moment, I sunk into the way she felt against me, her fingers gathering the precum from my cock, smearing it over the head. I shook in her touch as my mouth moved against hers. It had been so long since we were intimate, almost two weeks, and my soul had yearned for hers wanting to feel complete again.

But I knew this wasn't the right time. She was using me as an outlet for the pain she hid behind the smile on her face.

"This isn't right, angel," I gently pushed her away but kept a hold on her face. "I won't take advantage of you when you're like this."

Bloodshot and broken eyes stared up at me, soulless and lifeless, before she pushed me away to burrow herself under the covers again; where she'd been every day since the funeral.

Knocking on the open door, I peered inside expecting to see Y/N lying in bed where I left her but my heart stalled in my chest at the sight. The world came to a standstill as every single one of my senses was on high alert, panicked eyes dragging across every inch of empty space.

Shattered glass spilled onto the floor from the trail that began in the adjacent bathroom and that was when I noticed the mirror had been broken. I did my best to tiptoe around the shards as I peered into the shower, hoping to see Y/N.

“Angel?” My voice shook with fear, wondering what the hell happened in the twenty minutes I was gone.

Running a frantic hand through my soaked hair from the earlier rain, I scanned the room once more and made the decision to go search the rest of the house when I froze. Choking on a breath, I gingerly reached for a piece of paper stained with blood that lay on the torn up bed. It was from Y/N’s lyric journal. I only knew that because of the older writings from You and I.

Yet, it was the fresh ink that made my heart drop to the depths of my stomach, the sound of crinkling paper overpowering the music in the desolate room.

I’m sorry. I can’t keep trying.

JESSE

“What is going on?” I asked while pushing through the already open door, Michael following close behind.

Malcolm was trying his best to calm an erratic Noah, who wouldn’t stop pacing the room, drowning in the rainwater that clung to his shivering body. Chase was sitting on the couch with a relaxed Kuma laying in lap, while he was not. He had his phone pressed to his ear only to curse before redialling a number.

“I have to get back out there!”

Noah tried to push past Malcolm, only for him to shove him back.

“Dude, look at you! You're soaked and shivering! It’s pouring outside, you need to dry off before you catch pneumonia,” Malcolm angrily threw his auburn curls up into a messy bun.

Noah’s eyes narrowed at him. “It’s Y/N! I need to find her!”

About twenty minutes ago, Noah had called my phone in a frenzied state, rambling on about how Y/N is missing and he spent the last hour out in the rain looking for her. While everyone else had flown back home a few days ago, me, Michael, Chase and Malcolm hung back just in case Noah or Y/N needed anything.

Suddenly, I was very thankful we did.

“You tried, Noah! You were out in the rain for an hour. Chase had to drag you back inside,” Malcolm’s voice was raised but not nearly as high as Noah’s.

“Fuck you!” Noah cursed, finally brushing past Malcolm, only to be stopped by Michale and I as we made a barrier in front of the door.

I crossed my arms over my chest and shook my head.

“You’re not going anywhere until you tell me what the hell is going on,” I said as calmly as I could.

I’d known Noah for years, lived with him just as long, and I also knew that the only way to reason with his stubbornness was with your own calm stubbornness.

He tried to break through our barrier but Michael laid a firm hand on his chest, stopping him.

“Y/N’s gone!” Noah exasperated while throwing a hand in the direction of the door. “There’s broken glass in the bedroom and she left me a note. I have to find her!”

I’d never seen him in this kind of state. His hair was a wild mess, even from the rain. His eyes were wild and bloodshot, showing he’d been crying. His lips were blue from how cold he was. But worst of all was the look of pure failure on his face.

“You didn’t fail her, Noah,” I sighed while dropping my arms.

He blinked. “I-I-fuck!”

Michael stepped forward and rested two hands on Noah’s shoulders. “Look at me.”

When he refused, Michael gripped Noah’s chin, forcing him.

“You. Did. Not. Fail. Her.” Michael blew out his own shaky breath, it was killing both of us to see our friend like this.

So broken.

So defeated.

I rarely ever saw Noah like this, the only times I knew of him having a panic attack, it was always Nicholas there to help him through it. But now, it was us.

He let out an unsettling sob before he fell to his knees, letting out an earth shattering scream. All four of us watched him for a moment, allowing him to release the pent up frustration and anger he felt from the past week. Noah had held it together for Y/N, being there to catch her when she fell from her dad’s death, whereas no one had been there for him. He’d found himself in a deep hell and now, he woke up screaming with the realization that all he’d done to protect Y/N was for not.

Noah was on his knees, body shivering from the chilled rain and now his cries, so I tentatively knelt in front of him.

“Come on,” I spoke gingerly while placing my hands underneath his arms, ready to hoist him up.

“She left me,” he sobbed, grabbing a hold of my shirt and was met with eyes filled with heartache. “She fucking left me. Again!”

Glancing over to Malcolm with narrowed eyes from underneath my hat, I waited for him to give me some sort of indication that Y/N had in fact not left Noah in that way; all she needed was some time to herself.

Malcolm shared a look with Chase, who in turn shook his head. “She wouldn’t leave him. We all know that.”

But I didn’t miss the hesitation in his voice.

“There’s this fucking hole in my heart, Jesse!” Noah pounded his chest. “It’s that stupid shit Jolly always talked about, the soulmate crap. Y/N feels so far away and my soul is crying for her. It needs to find her because it can’t survive without her. After everything we’ve gone through, she still fucking left me. Why did she push me away? I was here for her, did she not realize that? I’d give up everything for her. But she just threw it all away!”

Noah was rambling a bunch of nonsense now, we all knew that. He didn’t mean any of it. Y/N and Noah’s love was pure as a fresh flower bud, trying to push through the heavy soil that dampred its growth. But once their souls find each other again, their love will be able to break through and flourish.

Like it always did.

“Come on,” I repeated again, this time now bringing Noah to his feet, albeit his head still hung low. “This is what you’re going-Noah, look at me.”

Reluctantly, he lifted his head.

“You’re going to take a shower, try to eat something, and sit your ass on that couch. Snuggle up with Kuma. Write out your feelings. Play guitar. Mediate. Whatever fucking helps you calm down. Because when I find Y/N and bring her back, you need to have a clear head.”

Something flickered behind those dull eyes and I wiped away those lingering tears.

“I promise you. I will find her and bring her back, alright?”

When Noah didn’t say anything, I tapped his cheek with my hand causing him to grumble a few curses under his breath.

“You didn’t have to smack me, asshole,” he rubbed at his face with the smallest of smiles.

Feeling the grip of anxiety loosen a bit, I let out a long breath and nodded. Trying to pull Noah out of this current state wasn’t helping my own anxiety but I tried my best to not slip into that familiar feeling of dread. Noah needed all of us to be strong.

“Micheal and I will go out to look for Y/N. You stay here with Chase and Malcolm, in case she comes back.

As we took two steps towards the front door, Malcolm stopped me with a grip on my elbow, stopping me. Chase was keeping Noah preoccupied by forcing him to snuggle with Kuma. There was an immense fear clouding his emerald eyes as he ran a hand over his face.

“Do you have any idea where to start?” He asked.

I zipped up my jacket with a sigh. “Not a fucking clue. Her dad’s grave is too far on foot. The rental car is still here. Unless she took a cab.”

“There’s one place no one knows about, besides me,” Malcolm admitted while shifting on his feet.

Michael slinked up beside me. “You’re just saying this now?!”

I placed a hand on his chest, feeling his anger radiate into the air around us. We all were doing our best to remain in control but deep down, we were afraid for Y/N.

“I didn’t think of it until now,” Malcolm sucked in a breath while averting his gaze for a few beats before locking it with mine. “There’s this garden about two blocks from here. Y/N and her dad went every morning when we were here last. It was where she had that conversation with her dad about Noah. Where he told her to go for it.”

With a reassuring squeeze on his shoulder, Michael and I quickly left the house and into the rain towards the car. Following Malcolm’s instructions, Michael drove towards the garden and as we pulled up to an empty lot, I did my best to look through the windshield while the sky opened up with even more rain.

“Shit. We’re going to have probably split up to find her. This place is huge,” Michael noted.

Suddenly, I remembered something from the one Hollow Souls live streams Noah and I watched together years ago. A fan asked her where she liked to go when she needed time to think.

"Oh, that's easy," she answered with zero hesitation. "The rooftop of the venue we’re playing or the rooftop of my apartment. I love looking out at the vastness of the city almost like I'm Zeus staring down at all the other DemiGods."

“You stay in the car, make sure it’s warm. I have an idea where she’d be,” I said before leaving the car and gazed through the onslaught of the current storm.

Thunder shook my bones as I ran through the garden looking for any kind of rooftop that Y/N could be sitting on. Minutes whizzed by as I stood there shivering, ready to give up hope, I saw the smallest of movements in the quick break of rain. There, less than ten feet in front of me, was Y/N sitting on top of a pergola with her knees pulled to her chest.

“How the hell did she get up there?” I muttered to myself before taking off my hat to shake out the water from my curls.

With a grunt, I willed my body up the scaffolding of the pergola and nearly slipped with how wet it was.

This has to be illegal, right? Am I going to get thrown in jail for this? Is this disrespectful? Oh man, I’m going to get haunted by some kind of ghost.

My knees shook when I stood to full height on the roof just as the storm started again.

“Y/N!” I yelled over the thunder.

Her head whipped up from being buried in her hands and the sight before me shattered me. Her eyes were red and puffy, her lips blue from the outside chill, and worst of all was the look that mirrored Noah’s.

Failure.

“J-Jesse?” She choked on her words. “Wha-? How did you find me?”

I extended a hand towards her. “Come on, let’s get you somewhere warm and dry.”

Y/N frantically shook her hair, the wet strands of hair sticking to her face. “I can’t go back there, please don’t make me. I-I-can’t.”

Quickly, I had her in my arms as I sat next to her, feeling her body trembling against me; not sure if it was from the rain or the sobs that controlled her. Even though we were drenched, neither of us moved.

“Sweetheart,” I cooed in her ear. “It’s alright.”

Y/N latched onto me. “N-no, it’s not. Everything is so fucked up! My dad is buried in the ground and it’s all my fault.”

This time, I forced those broken eyes to look at me.

“How is his death your fault, Y/N?”

“He’d been calling me for weeks,” her bottom lip trembled. “Weeks! I ignored him because I was too caught up in my life and didn’t want to disturb it.”

“Disturb it, how?” My brows furrowed.

Droplets of rain fell from the rim of my hat, splashing down onto her lap along with her tears.

“I was caught up in the bliss of everything; Noah, Hollow Souls, just life in general. I was afraid that he’d bring the same drama my mom had. All I wanted was to keep the bubble around me, protecting me from it all,” she cast her eyes down, ashamed.

I brought her closer to me when I felt her shivering more now and rested my chin on top of her head.

“Your dad has never been that way, sweetheart. You know that,” I reminded her.

She wiped her nose against my shirt but I couldn’t be bothered.

“I think deep down I knew something was wrong with him. The cough he had lasted way too long but I kept telling him to get it checked out. I thought he was ignoring me. So I guess I got tired of pushing something on him when he didn’t want it. Subconsciously, I began pushing myself away hoping he’d realize how upset I was with him not getting himself checked out, when in reality-.”

Her words trailed off, unable to finish, but she didn’t have too. I knew what Y/N was going to say.

“He fought for his life as long as he could, sweetheart. I promise you that he never meant to leave you like this,” I assured her.

“Why did he have to die? My dad left me broken and alone with a long life,” her voice was muffled against my chest.

I rubbed circles against her back, feeling the indents of bones against my palm and it was then I realized how drastically her dad’s death affected her. Noah mentioned that Y/N stopped eating days ago and with the dark circles under her eyes, it was evident she hadn’t been sleeping either. Shew was skin and bones, starved for the light of the everglow.

“I miss him so much, Jesse. I want him back with me. I went to his grave first to scream at him for leaving me like this. Digging in the dirt hoping he would resurface. All of the light is gone, just darkness. My body is numb with coming undone. Why did it have to be him?”

I lifted her legs so she could sit completely in my lap. “Your dad loved you so much, Y/N. I know you’re hurting right now and it’s going to take some time to get rid of that anger but it’s normal. I know you're tired now but you can't keep running because you’re terrified you won't see your dad on the other side. The only thing you have to remember is to not let that anger consume you and destroy everything good in your life. You cannot let it overcome the light.”

She sniffled and nodded. “I know. I pushed away so many of you, ignoring everyone. Astrid has been texting me wondering how I am but I don’t know what to say because I just don’t understand how I should feel. Chase and Malcolm have tried to get me out of my dad’s house the last few days but I leave them on read because I’m so tired. It physically hurts me to move out of bed.”

The rain began to let up as Y/N took a deep breath, it was unsteady and broken.

“Noah,” she cried. “Fuck. Noah. I kept pushing him away when all he has done is take care of me!”

She pushed away from me with a start. “Oh my god, Jesse! I left him. I promised him I would never leave him like that again but I did! He must hate me, I can’t believe-.”

I gently cupped her cheeks, brushing away the tears, and she was cold to the touch, falling alone like snow.

“Hey, stop. Noah does not hate you. He’s worried about you. He spent the last two hours out in the rain searching for you. If anything Y/N, you scared the shit out of him. But he doesn’t hate you.”

Her shoulders fell. “I left behind such a mess. I can’t imagine what was going through his mind when he saw the glass in the bedroom.”

“What exactly happened?” I wondered.

Y/N gnawed on her bottom lip, ripping away the dead skin. “I felt disgusted for what I tried to do to Noah. I almost forced him to take advantage of me because I needed to forget about this pain. How could I have done that?”

I didn’t answer, simply let her continue on. “I found myself staring at my reflection with revulsion so I punched the mirror. It shattered everywhere and I sliced my hand pretty good.”

Tenderly turning it over in my hand, I cringed when I saw the various cuts along her knuckles. Faintly, I could see dirt underneath her fingernails and my heart sank with the image of her digging at her fathers grave. The blood had been washed away from the rain but I knew that her hand needed to be bandaged up in case the wounds opened up again.

“Sweetheart, you weren’t in the right headspace. Noah would never hold any of this against you. He loves you, he just wants you back safely with him.”

Dull eyes stared up at me. “I owe him an apology.”

“Why don’t we get you back to the house first, yeah?” I suggested just as the rain began to slow.

Y/N didn’t say anything, only nodded, which was enough to raise her up with me just like I had done to Noah before.

“Jesse?”

Her voice was meek as she reached for my arms, holding onto them with all her might.

“Hm?” I hummed.

Our gazes locked for a long beat and gradually the light that was Y/N began to shine through the clouds that blocked her mind.

“I love you. Thank you for being here,” she wrapped her arms around me in a vice grip, nearly knocking me off my feet.

With a quiet laugh, I kissed the top of her head in the way a brother would his little sister.

“I love you too, kid.”

Playfully, she pushed me away. “Kid? You’re only four years older than me.”

With a shrug, I then helped her down the rooftop of the pergola and once we were back on solid ground, Michael came running up to us nearly knocking Y/N to the ground now when he wrapped his arms around her.

“Don’t ever do that again, Y/N! You scared the shit out of everyone!” he chastised her once her feet were stable on the concrete again.

She cupped his cheek. “I’m sorry. I never meant too. I was lost and needed to try and find myself.”

Michael nodded in her embrace. “You’re like a sister to me, to all of us. When you’re hurting, we all are. We just want to make sure you’re alright.”

“I know. I am now.”

Tears pooled in her eyes before Michael wrapped her underneath his arm and began leading her back to the car, me following close behind. But upon closer inspection of Y/N, I noticed something peculiar.

“Y/N?” I pulled them to a stop. “Where’s your shoe?”

She pursed her lips as a red hue covered her cheeks and looked down at the foot that didn’t have a shoe covering it. “Oh, well-uh-I tripped while running from the cemetery to this garden and it fell down a sewer drain; along with my phone.”

Michael and I shared a look before we burst out into a fit of laughter, us doubling over. Y/N rested her hands on her hips with the hope to be upset with us finding the whole thing hilarious, until her own laughter filled the air thick with humidity due to the previous storm.

With every precious laughter that emanated from Y/N, it was as if her soul was beginning to glow bright again. The light around her halo flickering back to life as the sun broke through the clouds; a sign from somewhere that everything would be alright.

NOAH

My mind was a mess of emotions, all leading me to think of the worst things of what happened to Y/N. Most of all, it demanded that I push past Chase who’d been guarding the door to find her myself. Jesse and Michael had been gone for quite some time, meaning they had yet to find her. I’d been so worried about her that I had yet to change out of my still soaked clothes that had barely dried, much to the dismay of Malcolm who continued to mutter under his breath that I was leaving puddles all over the floor.

It would be better if I went out there again. Maybe this time I could go a different route and-.

Suddenly the front door clicked open causing me and Kuma to pause our pacing of the floor and through the hazy vision of tears, I watched as Michael walked in, followed by Jesse who was holding a shivering Y/N against him. The sight of her like that stole all the air from my lungs as I let out a choked breath, the vice grip that was entangled around my heart from the moment I read the note finally began to loosen and we both stood there for a beat of silence, simply staring at one another.

Kuma barked happily before trotting over to Y/N, pawing at her leg yet her eyes never left mine.

I swallowed the burn in my throat while blinking away the tears and then all at once, we both ran to each other and as soon as our souls connected, it felt like the earth shifted around us. All evening while she’d been gone, the earth was off its axis but now that Y/N was in my arms again, all was right in our universe.

“Angel,” I brushed away the hair from her face. “Are you alright?”

She nodded, her bottom lip caught between her teeth, and she slipped her shivering hands underneath my shirt to claw at the skin of my back.

“I am so fucking sorry for walking out like that. We promised each other we wouldn’t, we would talk about things, but I broke that promise and I’m so sorry. I couldn’t keep trying, I felt like I was failing everyone, especially myself. I-I-couldn’t do it anymore.”

“It’s okay, angel. Just breathe. You don’t have anything to be sorry for. I’ve got you now. You’re back. You came back,” I assured her while cupping her cheeks.

Those eyes I loved so much were wet with tears as her bottom lip trembled with her sobs.

“I’ll always come back to you, Noah. Always,” she vowed with a graze of her lips across my jaw.

Reluctantly, I let her slip from my embrace to allow Chase and Malcolm to check her over while I brought Jesse and Michael in for a tight hug, thanking them for bringing her back to me. Soon, the four of them left, leaving Y/N and I alone with Kuma who continued to paw at her leg.

“He was worried too,” I motioned to the dog.

She bent low to her knees to scoop up Kuma, holding his warmth to her chest. “I’m sorry I scared you sweet baby. I’m sure Noah took good care of you.”

While she didn’t change her mind about taking the dog to the shelter once we leave, it still warmed my heart to see that she was now warming up to Kuma.

Speaking of warming up.

“Let’s go take a shower before we both get sick,” I said while linking fingers with her to lead her to the bathroom.

“I should clean up the glass,” she sighed as we stepped through the door of the bedroom but was shocked to see it already clean.

“Chase,” I informed. “It helped him to keep his mind focused on something other than where you were.”

She hummed while resting her chin on my bicep to gaze up at me. “I scared all of you, huh?”

I brushed a kiss across her forehead. “All that matters is that you’re back, angel.”

While the shower warmed up, steam slowly filling up the small space, I helped Y/N out of her clothes as it clung to her like a second skin and she did the same for me. Her nails dragged over the tattoos on my chest, down my abdomen, over to my arms and I shivered under her caress. When I took a hold of her hands, I frowned seeing the dirt under her nails and the scabbed over cuts along her knuckles.

Not saying a word, I placed my hands on her hips and brought her into the shower with me. The warm water immediately ease away the chill that hung to our bones as I switched out positions so Y/N was directly underneath the spray. Her head tilted back, exposing her neck to me, and she let out a soft moan; the noise causing my cock to twitch. I ignored the fire burning in my gut though to reach beside Y/N and grabbed her shampoo bottle.

My fingers worked the shampoo through the dark strands of her hair, working out whatever knots she received from the rain. She hummed as I massaged her scalp and kept her hands low on my hips, bringing us closer together. The only sounds were the water running over our bodies, down to the drain beneath our feet, and her soft giggles as I dragged my fingers down over her neck. Reaching up now, I pulled the shower head off of its hook and tilted her head back a bit further so I could rinse all of the soap out of her hair. As the conditioner sat for a few minutes longer than the shampoo did, I quickly stepped out of the shower to rummage around in the drawers of the vanity, water droplets splashing to the tiled floor.

“Mochi! You’re getting water all over the floor!”

Ignoring her scolding, I stood back in the shower and held her hand in one of mine, the other with a grip on a pointed nail file.

“Oh, a manicure?” She teased.

Giving her a playful glare, I began using the sharp end of the file to dig out the dirt underneath her nails as she stood there, watching. I didn’t need her to tell me what happened as I had a pretty good guess.

Once the dirt was clean from her nails, I set the file down on the shelf in the shower and went about rinsing the conditioner from her hair before washing her body, taking my time around her most sensitive parts. As much as I wanted to feel her body against mine in that way, it wasn't needed tonight. We needed to come together in a different way.

After Y/N was clean, she motioned for me to switch with her and now it was her turn to wash me. Although, watching as she tried to reach for my hair with soap all over her hands was a cute sight so I got on my knees, eye level with her stomach. While she washed my hair, I dragged a hand up and down her thigh, feeling the skin prickle from my touch.

“You need a haircut,” she noted.

I hummed in agreement, the noise rumbling in my chest, and I peered up at her. “It’s almost back to the wolf cut length.”

“I wouldn’t be opposed to it,” Y/N shrugged while rinsing the conditioner from my hair and tapped my shoulder so I could rise to my feet.

While resting on one knee, I paused for a moment as the now lukewarm water ran down both of us, and took in the sight of her. What used to be broken and dull had drastically changed in a matter of minutes. Thoughts of our redo date came fluttering to the forefront of my mind as I remained on one knee, the question I’d be desperate to ask weighing heavy on my tongue now. But internally I shook my head, knowing that it wasn’t the right time. It would have to wait until I received a sign.

Instead, I pushed myself up to my feet so Y/N could wash my body and as her hand grazed over my cock, I let my forehead fall to her shoulder. It had been so long since she touched me like this, the moment earlier today nothing compared to now. Earlier it was distressed but now, her touch was fuelled with the need to feel me against her; prove to her that her soul wasn’t dead inside.

“Y/N,” I panted when her fingers wrapped around me, pumping my cock slowly. “I-shit.”

I craved her like an addiction and I was ready to let go, allowing us to fall together as we always did. Only we were interrupted by rapid barking and scratching at the bathroom door, causing Y/N to shake with laughter.

“Kuma probably needs dinner,” I grumbled.

“Dinner actually sounds good right now. I’m starving,” Y/N pressed a kiss to my lips, one I wasn’t quite ready to let go of yet.

Brushing my tongue along her bottom lip, I devoured them with my own starvation. Her hands linked behind my necks and she stood on her toes to lean into me even more. Everything around us fell away and my heart beat was almost non existence as it was whenever we kissed. I found myself becoming lost in her aura, dragged deep within the depths exactly like the moment our fates were sealed that very first time our eyes locked.

I kept reaching for her, any inch of skin my nails could dig into to bring her closer to me. I needed to feel her heart against mine, syncing our heartbeats together, and she moaned into the kiss, it quickly being swallowed by my tongue.

“I love you,” I breathed as we pulled away.

Y/N pulled me in for another kiss, almost as if it was breathing life back into her and she needed more. Her lips captured the water hanging on my bottom lip and I nearly folded in her embrace.

“I love you too, Noah. I’m sorry my grief caused me to pull away from you. You didn’t deserve that side of me,” her voice quavered.

I twirled her hair between my fingers with a small smile. “What is grief if not love persevering.”

READER

Blowing my nose into the Kleenex, I wrapped my dad’s cardigan closer to my body as I dragged my slippers down the long hallway back towards the kitchen where I heard Noah rummaging around in the cupboards, most likely feeding Kuma.

“Hi sweet boy,” I murmured while reaching down and petting him between the ears.

“Hi yourself,” Noah smirked before setting the full bowl in front of Kuma.

When he noticed the sweater, he raised a brow and I shrugged. “It’s my dad’s. It still smells like him.”

With a kiss to the side of my head, Noah then motioned to the couch in the living room. “Do you want to watch a movie?”

“Actually,” I nibbled on my lips, trying to find the courage to do something that had been plaguing me the second we stepped foot into my dads house all those days ago. “I want to read my dad’s letter. I think we both should read them, if you want to.”

Noah paused, wiping down the counter, mere inches from the two letters that remained untouched, and his face gave nothing away. It made me nervous that I might have pushed something on him that he wasn’t ready for. I know it surprised both of us that my dad left a letter to not only me, but Noah as well.

“Should we read them together?” He tentatively reached for the letters and handed mine toward me.

Holding it close to my chest, I nodded back down the hallway. “I think-I think I’m going to read it in my dad’s room.”

Something flickered in his eyes as he tapped his letter on the inside of his hand. “Whatever you want, angel.”

After leaving him and Kuma together on the couch, I stood outside the door to my fathers room and with a few deep breaths, I gripped the handle and slowly pushed it open. The room was cloaked in darkness, the moonlight barely breaking through the curtains that covered both sets of windows, so I clicked on the light. I blinked a few times before taking in the sight of his room. It was exactly how I remembered it from the last time I visited him; even his bed was made and untouched. Until I slipped underneath the blankets, his scent wrapping around me in a tight embrace.

Taking a deep breath, I opened up the envelope to pull out the letter, my dad’s familiar hand writing drawing a choked sob from my lips. There’d been a reason why I’d been putting off reading the letter because it meant that he was actually gone. But now, I needed to know what he said.

Buttercup,

If you’re reading this it means that I’m gone. I am so sorry you had to find out this way that I was sick but I didn’t want you to worry about me. Your life is flourishing with Hollow Souls and Noah, the last thing you needed was to worry. I am so proud of the woman you’ve grown into even if I did have to watch from afar after the divorce. Please know I never held your choice of staying with your mother against you. I understood why you felt the need too but I am glad that you still kept your relationship with me. You will forever be my little girl. My buttercup.

Speaking of relationships, make sure to hold that Noah boy close because from what I’ve seen and heard, he loves you very much. You need someone in your life that will take care of you and will cherish all the moments you two share. I knew from the moment I saw that video of you two performing on stage together a couple years ago that he was in love with you. He’s a good man, buttercup. Don’t let him go.

Although, I am still shocked about Chase and Malcolm. Were they together when you visited last? All is well, I suppose. Good for them.

Now, if you’re in my house reading this, that means you’ve met Kuma. He’s a three month old Akita puppy and shouldn’t grow to be more than 40 lbs, at least that's what the guy at the shelter told me. I adopted him as a way to celebrate beating cancer the first time around but now that it’s back and spread to seventy percent of my body, I think it’s best if Kuma goes home with you and Noah. Hopefully he won't be too much of a nuisance to Salem but I have a feeling they’ll get along well.

Please don’t let the grief of my passing overcome you, buttercup. Don’t let the anger consume you to do something drastic. Your heart is too pure for that. Lean on others as they are there to help you. Remember me in the way I would sit in the chair in the living room, my glasses nearly falling off my nose, as I buried it into a book. Or the time we went to that manga shop down the road and you swore one of the characters looked like Noah, if he had his hair that length. Although, now I bet he does since his hair is shorter than the last time.

Does that length bother him? Or was he able to go on stage all those times with his hair down to his back? Was he not sweating?

Anyway, I’m rambling, even in a letter. But before I end it, I wanted to say how much I love you and will always be proud of you for whatever you accomplish with your life. Hollow Souls has come back from the brink of collapse after you kicked out that asshole, pardon my language, and you’ve proven to everyone that this is your band. This is what you were made for, buttercup. Continue to light up the world around you and don’t let anyone dull your light.

I’ll be with you in spirit, Y/N. Please don’t ever forget that.

Take care of yourself, Kuma, and Noah. Because that man will do whatever it takes to keep you happy. You’re the one for him, buttercup.

I’ll be shining light on your path and remember, it can’t rain all the time.

Love, Dad xx.

My sobs echoed throughout the quiet space of the bedroom as I read the letter again and again, imagining my dad sitting at the desk across from me, pen scratching against paper.

“I miss you so fucking much, dad,” I cried out while holding the paper against my chest.

I wasn’t sure how much time had passed or if Noah was finished reading his letter because as I lay under the covers of my dad’s bed, I let the familiar feeling of his spirit around me lull me into a much needed slumber that was long overdue.

NOAH

As I lay on the couch with Kuma snoring next to me, I scratched at his belly with one hand while the other worked out a text message to Jesse and Michael.

To Roommates:

Me: I hope you guys know Kuma is coming home with us.

Michael: We had a feeling so we sent Tay out to pick up whatever things you guys would need.

Jesse: My girlfriend was very excited to go shopping for not only Kuma but Salem as well. I guess she bought him a lot of toys and maybe a cat condo that I have no idea where we’re going to go with it.

I chuckled at the picture Jesse sent next of Salem on top of the new cat condo that stood awkwardly in the middle of the living room.

Me: I never thought I’d miss Salem this much.

Michael: Honestly, me too.

Jesse: How’s Y/N?

Me: Good, really good. She fell asleep in her dad’s bed. I peaked in on her a bit ago. I’m going to let her sleep there tonight. We’ve got a long day tomorrow of packing up her fathers stuff and shipping out what we're bringing back while we sell the rest along with the house.

We chatted for a few more minutes before I decided that it was now time for me to read the letter. Setting my phone to the side of the couch, I fiddled with the envelope in my hands. While I had a feeling my letter would drastically be different than Y/N’s, part of me feared what it said.

Unbeknownst to her, I actually reached out to her dad a couple of weeks ago but was only met with his voicemail where I left my question. I hated it that it had to be done that way, but there was no other choice.

As I ripped open the envelope, my phone buzzed next to me with a notification of a new email; one I didn’t read the name of. But it flashed brightly in the somewhat darkened room, the name almost urging me to look. With the now open letter in my hand, the familiar name continued to flash on my phone.

Keaton.

But it was the four simple words written on the piece of paper that held my attention, making my heart soar into my throat, causing me to nearly fall off of the couch. The two signs I'd been desperate for finally showcasing themselves.

You have my blessing.

#tina talks #noah sebastian #bad omens #just pretend noah sebastian #noah sebastian fanfiction #noah sebastian fics #noah sebastian smut #noah sebastian angst #noah sebastian x reader #mochi and angel #angel and mochi

264 notes · View notes

serxinns · 4 months ago

Note

Hey thank you so much for taking my request but

If it’s okay with you can you make a yandere giant bakusquad x human reader

That is so scared of giants and when one of the bakusquad kidnaps immediately

Without the village knowing that reader has been kidnapped by giants taking reader to their new home

I hope you take my request if not then I’m so sorry for making you uncomfortable!!!

If you did thank you so much for taking my request!!!❤️

Yandere giant bakusquad x human reader!

A/n: it's finally done lord I'm tried and I hope you enjoy!

You lived in a small village with a bunch of huge walls blocking from the outside world, due to a large beast called giants you were told they were brutal and hungry beasts who invaded villages and devoured any human they lay upon, you heard stories from, your friends of how deadly these creatures were one friend told you they would impaled villagers on the stick and roast them like a kabob or stories about humans traveling into the outside world especially near their territory never to be seen again

There were very strict rules from the town leader for going in and out of the protected village one of the rules was to be back at a certain time or get locked outside which scared the villagers a lot to the point most of then wouldn't even step out or sneak out knowing the consequences it was like they Isolated themselves

you and some of your friends didn't believe some of those lies always wanted to find out yourself you were a very curious and exploring person as a child always wanting to explore even in the more dangerous of areas one time a guard caught 4 years you almost escaped giving your parents a heart attack and a very stern warning from the guards to them as the older you get the more stubborn you were the villagers would call you and your friends rebellious for not listening to the leader but you didn't care

One day you and your friends decided to play true or dare it was all wimpy and easy at 1st like pranking the townsfolk stealing some food and tricking people but it became very extreme until it was your turn to be asked "truth or dare" You wasn't a wimp so you picked dare "I dare you to go into the giants territory" your friend smirked mischievously while the others looked in shocked intrigued and worried, you were unsure of the challenge yes it was true that you have went outside of the walls before but going to the giants territory aka the paint forest was forbidden

You thought about it for a moment your friends stared at you, waiting for an answer "I'll do the dare" they all cheered one friend looked worried and scared "But you have to come with me" they all went silent gawking at your statement you can tell by their faces that they didn't wanna do it and was unsure of it but their pride overtook and accepted

Time skip

you gather your things like climbing tools, weapons, flashlights, food, and water the 4 of you snuck out of your houses and into the quiet night while the village was pitch black only the moonlight and stars shining brightly into the night, the 4 of you crept towards the big entrance which leads to the outside, a sleeping guard that was supposed to do its nightly duties was standing there to your unfortunate, so the 4 of you thought for a second on what to do, a girl in the group named Tasha grabbed a big rock nearby and threw it hard as she could to the opposite side causing a loud thud when it hit the ground that alerted the guard

He woke up in a cold sweat, swinging his weapon. "Who goes there?!" He barked as he flashed his flashlights at some bushes that were rustling, which gave you and your friends the time to quickly go through the entrance and exit the village, "we made it," you thought as you looked around your surroundings, and there in front of you were the giant's territory..the woods everyone including you stared at it for a moment grabbed your flashlights and walk down the path leading to the woods

The closer you get the more unsettling it gets.. the rustling of the bushes from the strong wind and the shadows of the creatures within the forest grow disturbing becoming sinister you even hear animals and creatures that you haven't heard or learned about before you felt your group getting scared Mike(another one of your friend group who was the leader) even started to grow doubts about this plan but you kept going you didn't wanna back down now, can you?

As the three of you made it in front of the woods you all stopped and looked up the trees were as tall as the trees back in your area rocking with the rhythm of the wind, you took a breath look behind to see your group one last time and walked in with your lights held high as they followed you, Josh stopped everyone and decided to make a plan to survive in the woods "Sasha you to set up a fire, Mike you go set up camp y/n and I would hunt" you looked back a bit reluctant "hunt!? In this area! What if we get lost? We don't even know what creature lurks here!?" "We'll be fine, promise, just get a few animals and come back to the camp. "You were about to reply until Josh quickly ran, weapon in hand "asshole.." you muttered under your breath as you cautiously looked around for any animals...

Time skip again

You walked over bored carrying a bag full of dead animals you hunted you then grabbed your light and started heading back to the camp until you heard a loud thud behind you making the ground shake you froze for a second quickly turning back to see nothing but the darkness surrounding the light you then slowly turned back and started walking only a bit faster that's when you heard another thud you turned again but nothing...you were about to turn around until a Hand grabbed you

You screamed trying to grab your weapon but the hand gripped you tight your body started shivering and squirming in desperation to break free from whatever was gripping you but to no luck "Aw how cute! Are you lost little one" You slowly turned to see a giant girl with pink skin and yellow eyes smiling and cooing like you were some pet or little child you stared at her already afraid but confused but you didn't wanna find out so you tried biting her which made her let go a bit making you fall but she quickly catch you "Hey now no biting!" She scolded, lightly, glaring at you. "Please don't hurt me! Just put me down please!!"

You started sobbing as the giant looked down at you in pity. "No, no, honey, I'm not gonna eat you.." she started trying to softly rock you and shush your cries. "Oi pinkie, what's the hold-up?!" Both you and the pink giant turn to see an ashy-blonde hair male coming toward her, glaring at her "shitty hair and dunce fade are already done, and the tape face is already back at the kingdom. What's the hold up with you? His eyes then lay upon your small shaking figure trying to hide from his gaze

"Well, you see, I got this cute little human while hunting and decided I wanted to keep it! Poor thing is dirty and beaten! We can't just leave it here!" Bakugo stared intensely at you while you shivered in fear you looked so small and fragile! He might not admit it, but he already adores you. He grumbled something under his breath, and Mina's expression brightened. "You gonna come home with us, sweetie!" She said as she skipped along following him ignoring your pleads and cries and yells for help

"We're here!" She exclaimed opening her hand out to make you see it was a tall castle that reached above the clouds and the village itself looked ginormous as well you were stunned and a bit scared by the size of the castle and at the entrance, a dark-haired male and another girl with short purple hair approached them "back so soon?" The girl spoke up, carrying what seemed to be a delicious dish, which you can admit spelled pretty well. "Yep, and we brought a surprise!" She said as she slowly pushed her hands towards gently opening them to reveal a small shivering little human curled up in a ball

Both Sero and Jirous's eyes widen, seeing something too small and defenseless, dirty and beaten. "Mina, where did you get them? And why they're bruised up? It better not be Bakugos doing," Sero said, glaring at the male. "My doing?! I didn't do shit scotch tape alien was the one who found them like this!" "I was hunting. There's nothing wrong with me. Can I please just go home!" Mina then started petting your hair with her finger, comforting you like you were a crying child and ignoring your little tantrums the 2 giants' gazes softened at the sight of you

"Let's get them inside and clean them up," Jirou said leading Mina in as Mina carefully held you in her palms Sero started to run some warm water in a bowl making sure the temperature was warm enough while Mina gently placed you on the sink you tried to run but her hand blocks your view "now no running it's bath time for you!" She giggled, reaching her hand towards you, gently and quickly, stripping you down to nothing "H-hey! What the hell! " You quickly wrapped yourself with a nearby tablecloth as your face turned red in embarrassment you felt utterly humiliated

They all stared at you for a moment, Mina gently pushing you with her fingertips to get in, but you scrambled away, clutching the cloth tightly. You weren't gonna bathe in front of these people, especially giants! "What's wrong? The water isn't the right temperature?" Jirou asked, sounding very Eager... too Eager "N-no, I-I just don't feel comfortable b-bathing in front of all of you..." "Well, one of us has to stay with you and help you clean, so you need to pick one!" Sero explained while the others stared at you wondering who will you pick

You observed every one of them, Mina seemed nice enough but a bit too clingy, and the other giant named Bakugo seemed scary so it was down to Sero and Jirou, your gut tells you to pick Jirou plus u felt a little safe with her more than the slim giant name sero so you pointed at jiu which she smiled making sero and Mina pout and whine while bakugo rolled his eyes she then ushered the 3 out making sure they were out of sight completely and shut the door behind them she then walked over to you with a sponge and cup in hand "don't worry ill be extra gentle!"

She then picked up a sponge and started scrubbing you slowly and carefully making sure no dirt was in sight you gotta admit it felt nice like you were in a spa you almost fell asleep which didn't go unnoticed by Jiro who was enjoying every single minute of your cuteness she then began to wash and comb out your hair with a large brush trying to get all the knots out then began rinsing you off with the cup which you cough wheeze and gag cause of the water "Sorry sorry!" She quickly apologized she then let you get out of the bowl as she looked away for a moment to let you wrap around in the table cloth once you were all covered up she gently picked you up and the two of you headed out the door into their shared bedroo,

You were met with the 3 giants again smiling excited to see you were fresh and clean "We got you some cute cozy little clothes for you to wear" Mina said excitedly holding out a cozy set of clothing you stared at for a moment wondering how the hell did they managed to make these so fast but your thoughts interrupted when sero pushed the clothes at you "go on wear em!" He said you smiled nervously as everyone stepped out for you to change you quickly changed into the clothes and it was a but big on you but it was pretty cozy, you then yelled out you were done as the 3 came in again

Mina squealed at the sight of you cooing and doting on you, repeatedly saying, you're so cute!" Or "I could just eat you right up," which made you a bit concerned. "You should thank Bakugo for the outfit. He made it just for you!" Sero said teasingly as Bakugo blushed, hitting the back of the man's head and earning an "ow!" From him "You welcome..." he managed to grumble out avoiding eye contact with you "Oh kiri and denki shoukd be here with the food any minute now! We can all have a dinner together!"

She said excitedly, running downstairs with you, followed by Sero following her behind and lecturing her to slow down when carrying you, "Kirishima and Denki?" You questioned yourself as the door swung open; answering your question, 2 males appeared, one with red hair and sharp teeth and the other with blonde hair as well, but with a black lightning strike. "We're home; sorry we're late; someone kept trying to eat all the rations?" He said as he glared at Kirishima, laughing sheepishly. "I couldn't handle it. I was hungry!" The boys were both bickering each other earning a bit of a chuckle from you being heard by the 2 boys as they glanced at you

"Aww who's this little one!" Kirishima said, reaching hid finger out to you, which you flinched and tried squirming away. "We found them in the woods! Poor thing was beaten and dirty and alone!" Mina whined as the 2 boys looked at you with sympathy. "No, seriously, I'm fine! I was just hunting for some food with some friends for our camp. I need to go back home and-" "Honey, this is your new home!" The blonde Denki spoke up smiling gleefully at you, you froze realizing that home was Impossible "n-no! My homes down there in thr village my parents could be worried and the leader coul get mad-"

"Oh please, your parents never cared about you anyway, and that leader of yours is cruel for leaving someone as small and fragile as you out," Bakugo said, rolling his eyes and earning a glare from everyone in the room. "Bakubro that isn't very manly!" The red hair-stated "yea! You should've said it more softer they're already suffering from the realization that they got abandoned!" Mina added as she looked at you softly, "But it's true, sweetheart. I'm so sorry!" She pulled you closer to her cheek as some sort of hug there was an awkward silence in the air Jirou "cmon let's get you nice and fed and then get you to bed" Sero then grabbed you and headed towards the kitchen with the others behind

You were served a small portion of spaghetti as the others chomped down and devoured their food trying to make conversation with you wanting to learn more but all you could do was stare at your plate realizing that there was no way to escape these giants who think you got abandoned and now you were treated as some sort of pet or whatever! This can't be your fate no way no matter how good the food and care are you want to go home to your parents to your hometown to your village!

"Alright, little crystal, it's time for bed!" The red-haired giant claimed as he took you upstairs to prepare you to bed, you were met with the shared bedroom again but this time there was a large doll house that was 2x the size of the house in your village Kirishima grabbed the key from the counter and open it up revealing a nice looking bed he then places it down in the counter drawer with a working mini night light seriously were these guys that prepared to have a human pet or something!? He then placed softly on the bed Sero tucked you in as Mina, Denki and Jirou kissed you on the forehead making you blush

"Goodnight, sweetheart, sweet dreams~" As they got ready for bed, you then realized that this was your new home and this was your new life from now on...you can never escape them. You were their little human...Their human and they were damned to let anyone take that away from them

191 notes · View notes

deepfivetraveller · 2 months ago

Text

King Baldwin iv x Time!Traveller!reader

chapter 3

chapter 2

As the carriage comes to a stop the guards of the castle help you come out, to which you were ost thankful for. This castle was a mere building for military defense so it didn't feel as luxurious as a palace. Nevertheless, that doesn’t mean it wasn’t beautiful.

The odd thing was no one in the castle treated you like a criminal. Every guard and maid on the way bowed to you in respect, confusing you to the core. “Uhm sir.” You call for the guard escorting you. “Why is everyone…doing that?” another maid walking across bows towards you. “Well madame you cured many of their relatives that’s why.” He comes to a stop.

“Your (h/c) hair, (e/c) eyes and (s/c) skin are distinguishing characteristics making you easily recognisable.” You gulp at his intense gaze. “And among the thankful people, I am one of them” He bows “Thank you for saving my niece.”

“O-Oh your welcome no need to mention it” an awkward aura surrounds the both. Well at least you have the support of the common folk. But this confirms that the nobles do not plan on doing the same. They always tend to walk on a league of their own.

The guard walked you through a verandah-like open area. The ivory walls were decorated with patterns of red triangle and blue squares, leaving your mouth agape the entire time, which clearly annoyed screen

‘How are you admiring walls when you’re clearly about to die!? You didn’t even panic during the carriage ride!’ Screen’s brightness fluctuated rapidly showing it’s anger. The guard moves slightly away. “A calm mind is essential to win a battle.” You cockily reply. “Besides the adrenaline is kinda keeping me in line. The common folk believe in me anyways!” It rolls it’s kaomoji eyes at your reply.

Truth to be told you did panic. During the carriage ride you squeezed your hand so hard, your nails pierced through the skin causing slight amounts of blood to be released. The wound dried up fine but the pain was still there.

“We’re here” He says. Two other guards are stationed near a door and they instantly bow at your arrival. “This is his majesty’s bed chamber. When you enter you ought to curtsy in front of him…I don’t know why your presence is required but nevertheless, best of luck.” The other two men nod at you in reassurance. You only have the time to take a deep breath until they open the door, so you did, hoping the oxygen would wake you up.

The two dragged open the heavy doors. The sunlight from the window momentarily blinded you, but the men wasted no time in gently dragging you forward. Around the bed three men were seated. You move a little forward and the guard announces your presence. “Your Majesty, I've brought madame Y/n.”

Your eyes immediately lock with the leaper king. His blue eyes are glow even if his eyelids were gnawed and decomposed like. Something about those eyes made you snap back into reality. As instructed you do a quick but deep curtsy. “Your majesty.”

King baldwin wasted no time and nods, signaling you to relax. He acted on instinct and didn’t even know the reason for why he nodded before seeing you again. The leper tried to hide the awkwardness by adjusting his silver mask, looking at the man who is not standing. He clears his throat “His majesty is very pleased with your efforts on curing the sick. He wishes to reward you.”

Wait what

The man claps and a servant comes in holding a tray with jewels, threatening to fall off due to the huge amount. You stare at the shine of them and hesitantly take the tray. “T-Thank you your majesty.” He nods again, still not looking at you.

Hands shake from the frenzy of the situation. Your breathing rate has significant changed from the calm demeanour of before. ‘Aren't they supposed to like, kill you?’ You think.

“You seem perplexed.” The one standing points out. “Why? Speak you mind” The other man reassures.

“I just thought…The crusaders……..” You clutched your skirt tightly, looking down in embarrassment.

The crusaders said nothing about you being a witch, it was you who assumed everything. When the king heard the you mentioning his men, he turned around immediately. “What did they do?”

“If i'm correct, there was a rumour circulating that your majesty would hang her for being a witch”

“Heavens no!” His pupils retract back in shock. “Why would i convict you of that, you saved the my people.” The blue eyes still linger on you and if you had looked up, you could see he was almost pouting.

“Apparently the crusaders weren’t the most kind to her either.” He replies again. The king is now definitely gobsmacked. “I am so sorry for that, it’s not their fault they’re trained for war so they don’t seem hospitable at a first glance.” While he rushes with the apology, you say "Okay" right away.

“We have called you here for another reason as well.” Baldwin looks at the man standing to explain further. The state of the room changes drastically. “You have cured a mass amount of people in the span of two months. This was something the kingdom has been trying to do for years.”

‘Years?? Seriously all I did was feed them oranges’

“And since you were able to do that… we figured you might be able to cure the king.”

‘Damm plot twist!’ Screen ate virtual popcorn as it saw the drama unfold.

You gaze shifted to the king, who refused to look up at anyone, gazing straightforward at the blanket he is covered in.

“Gentlemen… I’m not—”

“The pay is quite handsome”

“And we’ll grant you the status of a noble”

Okay, that was not—

The screen immediately duplicated itself, showcasing a quest.

‘Cure the Leper king (Main quest)’ The three men stare at you while the screen leaves you no choice, showing the options ‘|Yes| or |Yes|’

“Hah…Fine I’ll do it” You roll your eyes, annoyed at the circumstance.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Sorry for the late update! I had to rewrite the whole chapter since i didn't like the narrative it was going in. Also please make me aware of any typo, i just got a new keyboard and i didn't spellcheck anything 😚

#kingdom of heaven #the leper king #king baldwin x reader #the leaper king #king baldwin iv #king baldwin x you #baldwin iv x oc #baldwin iv x reader #baldwin of jerusalem #baldwin x reader

132 notes · View notes

daycourtofficial · 5 months ago

Text

I got cursed like Eve got bitten - part XII

Pairing: Azriel x Rhysand's sister!reader | WC: 2.5k | Warnings: none

Summary: reports of a rare powered fae popping up in Illyria send Azriel and Rhysand on a journey through the past, unraveling a truth they thought long buried

Previous part | Next part | Masterlist

This morning you had been greeted by Feyre, her chirpy voice had a sense of urgency to it as she asked if you had any plans for the day. “We are hosting a very formal and stuffy figure from the Court of Nightmares, and we would feel better if you weren’t around for it.”

Your brows raised, but Feyre quickly cut in again. “Not because we don’t like you or anything, but our visitor is quite.. atrocious. I wouldn’t subject anyone to his presence if necessary.” She spent a moment looking for the right words, but whoever this was clearly was not someone Feyre liked or even tolerated.

You nodded, “I’m no dignitary, I’m not sure my presence would be necessary in the slightest.”

You felt a pang in Feyre’s chest, something quick and gone in a flash. Guilt, maybe. It was getting easier to feel the emotions of the people around you, however it was difficult to distinguish everyone’s emotions. The way Feyre felt happiness was different than how Rhysand felt it, causing it to be more work for you to decipher individual emotions.

But something about Rhys’s emotions felt familiar.

“Was there anywhere you’d like to spend the day?”

You thought for a moment, having spent the past few days exploring the city’s restaurants. “Is there a library in Velaris?”

Feyre’s eyes lit up in delight, “I know just the place. Azriel will lead you there.”

Your heart stopped momentarily, blinking. You hadn’t seen Azriel since your power display a few days ago, and when you had asked, Feyre told you he had been gone on a mission for a few days, having just got back in last night.

But that didn’t mean he was far from your thoughts.

The first night he was gone you were plagued with dreams about him, his shadows cloaking the two of you in a thick darkness as you fell through the skies. As the nights went on, the dreams became more intimate - both sexually and emotionally. One night you dreamt of holding his hand, that dream immediately being followed up with a dream of him bending you over the vanity and forcing you to watch the two of you in the mirror.

You weren’t sure what it was, but you knew being near him would be difficult, these feelings so new for you.

“Are you unavailable?” Your words came out stuttered, uncertain. She quirked a brow at you before her gaze softened. “I am, yes. So is Rhysand.”

Mother’s tits.

“I am terribly sorry, this was very.. Abrupt.” She chose her words carefully, a mask of politeness on her face. “But I can assure you that you’ll be fine with Azriel.”

Something pinged in your chest, a sharp warmth crawling your skin at her words.

“Thank you for the reassurance.”

She nodded before heading to walk away and your head reeled at the conversation as her steps retreated. Why was it your powers only really worked on males? Were their emotions that much simpler to untangle and assign names to?

You were lost in thought about how unreadable Feyre was to you when a soft breeze carried the scent of pine and night chilled mist.

Azriel.

You turned, his hazel eyes standing out amongst the shadows covering his face. He smiled at you, each day the bags beneath his eyes growing smaller, the crook of his lips getting bigger.

And more inviting.

“Did you sleep well?”

Your face flushed, thinking back to the lack of sleep you had gotten. Every time you had closed your eyes, it was as if your brain were playing a story between the two of you, a moving picture of a make believe life, flashes of joy and heartbreak and domesticity.

You coughed it away, “yes, thanks. Did you?”

He merely hummed in response, deepening your blush. He looked at you as if he knew what you were up to all night - how your sleep was plagued with images of his hands, his legs, his mouth. How in a last ditch effort to find some peace, your hand slipped beneath your nightgown as you thought about the vivid dreams of his fingers, his scarred hands in lieu of your own.

The breath rushed from you. Had you said his name while thinking of him?

You could feel his amusement in your chest, and you pushed him slightly, not moving him in the slightest.

“Can you take me to the library?” You were quick to change the subject, not wanting to know exactly what your neighbor heard you doing. He nodded, his face looking at you with less amusement and more kindness.

It made him radiant.

“Where is this library?”

You grabbed a coat, tightening it around yourself before heading toward the front door. You stopped when you realized he wasn’t following you, turning on your heel to look at him. He nodded his head toward the balcony, moving toward it.

“No.”

He put his arms across his chest, one of his siphons glowing a deep blue on his chest.

“Why not?”

“I don’t fly. Wingless, remember?” You moved your hand behind your head to show the empty space your wings took up. Your words caused a pained expression to cross his face, but it was over just as quickly as it came.

“Yes, I am aware. Are you aware I have two arms?”

You gaped at him, “you can’t be serious.”

“Do I look like an unserious male?”

“You look very jovial to me.”

He scoffed, “will you please come with me to the balcony so I can take you to the library?”

“Why can’t we walk?”

“It’s impossible to get there on foot.”

The surprise was all over your face. “Is this a flying library?”

“No.”

“Then there must be a footpath somewhere.”

He sighed, rubbing the bridge of his nose. His shadows peeked over his shoulders, as if they were laughing. “There is, but it’s a 10,000 step staircase. What would you prefer?”

You thought it over, contemplating being in the sky, in Azriel’s arms, or passing out halfway up the steps.

You chose the former, Azriel hoisting you into his arms bridal style. He carried you as if you weighed nothing, walking you to the balcony, each step heating your face. His hands wrapped around your waist and legs, his touch doing something to you that you were praying to the Cauldron wouldn’t shift your scent enough for him to notice.

“Are you ready?”

You swallowed hard, before nodding, face full of heat, “is it too late to say I’m afraid of heights?”

He squinted, “just a little late.”

His wings stretched out behind him, his knees bending slightly as he took off into the skies, his large wings flapping quickly to get you both airborne. You screamed in his hold, causing his grip to tighten around you as he held you. “I’ve got you.”

His voice did little to soothe the panic inside of you. Your arms tightened around his neck, holding on for dear life. You hid your face in his neck as he flew high up in the sky, gaining altitude.

“I always thought flying was a sacred thing.” Your words were meant to distract yourself, but they only caused you further discomfort as he responded.

“It can be. Some Illyrians go on mating flights.”

Your brows raised, moving in his arms to get a better look at his face, but he continued looking forward.

“Have you ever been on one?”

The flap of his wings halted suddenly, his flight pattern stuttering, causing the two of you to dip suddenly before picking back up, a soft scream coming from your lips.

“That is a very private question.” His smile lessened, and you felt like a reprimanded child with his response. Your mouth went dry, desperate to change the conversation and to have him change the look on his face.

“Do you like flying?”

He sighed, happy for the shift in conversation. “I do. I like flying with my brothers.”

“Brothers? I thought you had only one.”

His flight stopped again, and you heard him curse underneath his breath.

“Yes I have two brothers. They’re both a pain in my ass.”

You giggled, your fingers subconsciously playing with the hair on the back of his neck. Once you realized what you were doing, you pulled your hand away, not wanting to see the look of annoyance you thought you would find.

Instead his face was covered in disappointment, quickly covered up with stoicism.

“Why’d you tell me you only had one?”

He shrugged, the movement strange as he held you. You could tell he wouldn’t elaborate more, opting to stay quiet. His shrug was enough of a dismissal for you to steer the topic away from his lie.

“I don’t have any siblings. At least none that I know of.”

He nodded, looking apologetic. “I’m sorry.”

You shrugged, “it’s not your fault.”

You turned away, watching a massive castle come into view. “Wow.”

You took in the stone architecture, the structure built right into the side of the mountain. You could see where the ten thousand steps came from, a direction you’re glad you avoided.

Azriel banked to the right, flying the two of you to land directly on a balcony. His landing was incredibly gentle, a stark contrast to the landings you had seen in your village.

“Thank you, Azriel.”

“You can call me Az.”

You looked up at him, and you felt something like vulnerability in your stomach.

“Okay, Az.”

Now you felt butterflies at how happy he looked at the nickname.

“I’ll be back for you in a few hours, don’t fly off with any strange bats.”

You giggled, looking out the window. “As if I didn’t fly here in the arms of a strange bat.”

Az smiled, and his emotions felt familiar in your chest as well. Like Rhysand’s, but different. They felt stronger, something inside of you urging you to fix it. His chest felt heavy, but like the weight was manageable. As the two of you spoke, it got lighter and lighter, occasional flickers of joy and amusement slipping through.

He nodded, “yes but I’m the least strange of them all.”

With those words, he turned and walked away, taking off from the balcony, but not before he glanced back at you one last time before he disappeared in the sky.

After he left, you craned your head, looking around the library. You didn’t see anyone, but you heard shuffling and occasional floor scuffing, so you knew at least someone was here. You walked around for a while, your hands feeling the stacks as you searched the titles, pulling anything seeming of interest. You had pilfered through Rhys and Feyre’s library at the River House, but this one was much, much bigger.

After picking a stack of books you could barely carry, you wandered through the floors, looking for the perfect spot to curl up. You weren’t sure how Azriel was going to find you, but he only told you to stay in the library, and you were technically following his instructions.

A few floors below, you found a quaint little corner nook that had a fireplace, a few cozy chairs, some blankets, and the walls were covered in old maps. You smiled, satisfied at how perfect the spot seemed before dropping into the chair, opening the first book in your pile, quickly getting lost in the pages.

You weren’t sure how long you had been engrossed in your book, half of it finished, when footsteps interrupted your reading. You looked up, expecting to find Azriel, but the male before you wasn’t him. He wasn’t even Illyrian. You had never seen a full high fae male before - Rhys was the first wingless male you had ever seen. This male looked… different. He was incredibly attractive, long blonde hair and brown eyes observing you. He had a small button nose that curved up at the end, and you were taken aback by just how pale he was. His skin was practically translucent, the color of his veins visible through his skin.

You didn’t know fae could be so pale.

You smiled in greeting, nodding politely. He looked up and down your body, and you straightened from the relaxed position you had taken while reading, putting a bookmark in your book before setting it down.

“Well, I don’t believe I have ever been so engrossed in a book myself. It must be fascinating.”

You smiled, your lips straining at the action. He made you feel weird, his emotions a confusing ball inside of you you began attempting to untangle. “Oh, yes. I love a good mystery novel.”

His ears perked at your words, his lips quirking in a smile that made him more sinister than attractive.

“I am quite fond of mysteries as well.”

He thumbed through the shelves that surrounded your nook, silent strides across the rug, making his way further into your cozy corner. “And perhaps I have found one.”

You gave a half laugh, confused at his words.

“What’s a pretty birdie like you doing away from Illyria?”

“I’m sure you’re mistaken, I’m no birdie.”

His eyebrows raised, an expression of faux shock on his face. “Forgive me, I can be insensitive to your people’s ways.” He stopped in front of the fireplace, the light casting his light in shadow. “Where were you from?”

You eyed him wearily before telling him, “Tartu.”

He moved to the left, his gaze set on the map on the wall, his finger tracing around a few spots near your village, creating a line between the spots and your village.

“In such a small village, I imagine Velaris is a fairytale.”

His words held no malice, but you couldn’t shake the feeling of slime coating his words as they hit your ears.

“Yes, I would agree. It’s a beautiful city.”

He walked the room, eyes lingering on the books lining the walls, his entire presence filling you with dread. “Rhysand makes interesting choices in terms of what he keeps close to the vest. Interesting choice for a High Lord to hide the city he spends most of the year in.”

Your eyes widened at the disrespect toward Rhys - in the few weeks you had spent in Velaris, no one had spoken ill of him to you. “I beg your pardon, I’m not following.”

He rubbed the dust away from his fingers, extending a nod toward you. “He’s a man shrouded in secrets, be cautious of what lies beneath the fog.” He walked toward you, picking up your hand in his. His skin felt like ice as he brought it to his lips, his kiss sending chills through your body.

“What a pleasure it has been, finding you here.”

You search his pale eyes for some flicker of warmth, the ice you found inside making your insides burn with cold. “Likewise.”

The lie rolled off your tongue, watching his blonde hair swish as he left. The room felt suffocating in his scent, and you were never quite able to get as comfortable as you had been before his visit.

Permanent taglist: @vanilla-seabass @cyrygher @lees-chaotic-brain @topaz125 @chessebookgirl @fides25 @lady-of-tearshed @ashbatz @fxckmiup @lilah-asteria @justvibbinghere @daughterofthemoons-stuff @mybestfriendmademe @heartless-tate @tsunami-of-tears @idrkwhatthisisimsorry @olive-main @azrielsmate3 @pit-and-the-pen @durgenyx @dee-writes-smut @chairofchaos @thelov3lybookworm @berryzxx @throneofsmut @kennedy-brooke @prythianpages @itsswritten @acotarxreader @milswrites @the-golden-jhope @hannzoaks @secretlyhers @tothestarsandwhateverend @sarawritestories @chxosangxl

Azriel taglist: @brieflyclassymortal @thisiskaylin @magicstrengthandcourage @panther-girl-124 @slytherintaco @userxs-blog

Thanks for reading ❣️

#acotar fanfiction #azriel x reader #azriel #azriel x you #azriel fanfic #acotar writing #azriel x y/n #azriel series #i got cursed like eve got bitten

260 notes · View notes

justagirlwholikesadam · 1 year ago

Text

The American: Welcome Back!

Remus Lupin x American! Reader

Summary: Sirius slips out a name that Harry has never heard of before. He wants to get to the bottom of it and wants to know who is this so called, Yankee.

A/n: Not sure of doing more on this. It's up to the readers. I had this idea brewing in my head. Enjoy! -L

Warning: SFW, fuff, angst, tonks doesn't get the hint, Harry finds out he has a aunt, we are with remus because why not, saying the lord's name in vain.

Word Count: 4.1K

═ ≪ ❈ ≫ ═

The day was long and Harry was utterly exhausted. There were some days where he didn't even want to get up from bed. He was tired. Tired of everything that had recently happened. Voldemort was coming back and he had an army. He wanted to join The Order of Phoenix, Sirius had backed him up during dinner at Grimmauld Place. The place that once held the Black Family is now used for The Order to have their meeting.

Roaming around Grimmauld Place after dinner, Harry found himself in the room that held the family tree of the Black Family. That’s what Sirius told him when he found him inside looking at the walls.

“My mother did that after I ran away. She was a charming woman.” Sirius told him as he pointed at a burn mark above his name on the wall. Harry can see the sadness and anger in his eyes. Sirius hated his family for their wicked ways and their outdated ideas.

“I was always welcomed at the Potters.” Sirius answered Harry when the boy asked him where he went after he left home at the age of sixteen.

“We all were.” Sirius said as his eyes drifted to the end of the room, there was a faint smile on his face. “Your grandparents were so kind to everyone. Even to me and to Yankee.”

“Yankee?” Harry asked Sirius. His Godfather’s blue eyes widened when he realized he said it outloud.

“Another friend of the group. Remus hasn't mentioned it to you?” Harry shook his head.

“Another secret added to the list of secrets everyone keeps from me. How grand.” Harry said with a huff as he turned away from Sirius. He understood his godson. He didn't want Harry to feel that way. Before Sirius can speak out the front door opens and he can hear people walking inside.

“It's probably the Order. We should greet them. We will speak about this.” Sirius said, placing a hand on Harry’s shoulder.

Sirius walked, Harry was behind him as they made their way down the hall to the kitchen where they saw Tonks and Remus. By the look on Remus’ face, Sirius knew Remus was annoyed. He chuckled when he saw Tonks being a little bit too touchy to his best mates liking. Harry watched as he sat down on the kitchen table as Remus dogged a touch from Tonks and made his way to sit across from Harry.

“Harry.” Remus greets him as he sits down by the far end of the table where Harry sat. Sirius quickly makes his way to the only seat next to Remus.

“Tonks, I believe Molly wanted to speak with you about something.” Sirius said over his shoulder at her, who just then realized she was too late to sit next to Remus. She rolled her eyes but nodded before walking away from the kitchen. Harry kept his mouth shut as he looked at Sirius and Remus who were having a silent conversation with their eyes.

“This wouldn't be happening if you just told everyone the truth, Moony.” Sirius finally said putting his elbows on the table.

Remus took a drink of his tea and glanced over at Harry.

“Tonks is a lovely lass but she doesn't understand the word NO.” Harry knew too well about Tonks' crush on Remus. He had seen the girl fawn over his ex werewolf teacher before. Remus always lets her down gently, telling her he was too old for her and he doesnt think it's a good idea because he's a werewolf.

“Well her and Molly are in the same boat.” Sirius commented, making Remus agree with him since Molly was the first to add the idea into Tonks' mind.

“Maybe Yankee can help.” Harry mumbled as he looked down at the table not noticing how Remus' face changed.

“What?” Remus asked in a deep voice causing Harry to look up. Looking over Sirius who had a grimace look, his heart fell to his stomach.

“Where did you hear that name?” Harry cursed at himself, calling himself an idiot for throwing that name out. He wasn’t expecting Remus’ reaction. Remus' eyes darken for a second.

He did it because he had got annoyed by the fact that no one wanted to tell him anything. He knew it was true because of the look on Sirius’ face when he told them at dinner about what Voldemort wants. Molly had interrupted Sirius, telling him that Harry is just a boy and that he doesn’t need to know any of this.

“My fault, Moony. It came out when I told Harry about his grandparents.” Sirius said, looking over at Remus.

“Didn't we say-” “I know.” Sirius cuts him off.

Before Remus could speak again, Sirius waved his hand at Remus. “Do remember, I have kept it a secret for 12 years. That counts for something and Harry should know about his cool badass aunt.”

‘Aunt? Cool? Badass?’ Harry repeats to himself. Remus takes another sip and looks at Harry over the rim of the teacup. Looking over at Sirius, who is staring at him with pleading eyes to not be mad. Remus lets out a sigh.

“My wife is indeed a cool badass, isn't she?” Remus asked while giving Sirius a smirk. His pal smiled and bumps his shoulders with him before looking over at Harry.

“Wife?” Harry asked, looking between Remus and Sirius. “But you don't have-” Remus brings a hand to his neck and pulls on a golden chain under his sweater and shows it to Harry. There was a golden wedding band at the end of the chain.

“Is she-ddd-dead?” Harry asked in a stutter. Sirius shakes his head at Harry and he doesn't know why he felt relief. “I spoke to her two days ago. She made it safely to California after being stationed in New York for two years.” Remus said.

“In America? New York City, the states?” Harry asked, surprised. The two men infront of Harry nodded, smiling at the young boy's shocked face.

“Why would she leave? She's your wife.”

“She left because she is an American and they needed people. Hence the nickname, Yankee.” Harry still looked confused.

Sirius leans forward. “We aren't the only Order, Harry. Voldemort has gone as far as letting other Death Eaters go to the States to recruit more. Yankee is a member of our Order as well as the American’s Order. She is fighting as we are speaking."

“Wow.” Harry said after a few seconds.

“Does she know about me?” Sirius lets out a chuckle as Remus just smiles at Harry.

“Knows you?! She wiped your behind when you were just a babe. Remus here too.” Sirius smacks Remus’ back then turns serious to Harry.

“As the godfather, I had much more important things to do with you then wiping your behind.” Remus rolls his eyes at Sirius.

“Like buying him a broom when he was just a couple of days old.” Remus said with a laugh.

“Sirius would watch us change you as he stood by the door of your room. Harry, Sirius is willing to do anything for you but he just couldn't change your diaper even if it was with magic. The moment he saw we were done. Sirius would grab you and announce there were official and important things to do with you.” Harry just smiled bright as he listened to Remus' story.

“Yeah! They were important.” Sirius shouts playfully.

“Watching the telly with Harry isn't that important.”

“I would show him quidditch matches, like I said, an important matter.” Their laughter quicked down after a few minutes.

“She loves you so much. We both do.” Remus said softly, dropping his gaze from Harry after Harry caught it.

Years thinking he was alone and the only family he had hated him had taken a toll on Harry. There was so much abuse he had put up with and even when the world around him was crumbling down with everything that was going on. He felt happy that there were people who loved him. People he can consider his family. Harry thought it was only Sirius but he just gained an uncle and an aunt. His little family was growing.

“Why keep it a secret, then?” Harry asked. “It will help to get rid of Tonks” The young boy nodded.

“She’s wanted.” Sirius answered him, making Harry frown. Remus leans over the table. “Yankee is a powerful witch and dont think I'm just saying this because she's my wife but she might even be in Dumbledore’s level of magic. She had gone up with him once and almost won.”

“Who wants her so bad that it must be kept in secret?"

“The Dark Lord himself, at first it was the Death Eaters because she was in their house.”

“She was Slytherin?” Harry asked in a shout as he rose up from his chair. Sirius and Remus glance over at each other knowing all too well of this reaction when people found out what house you were in while you were at school.

“She wasn't like them. Different from everyone. She was the only American in Hogwarts in our time.” Sirius said.

“I don't believe it.” Harry said. Remus stood up and grabbed his empty tea cup.

“She was different from them. That we must say. We say that because she had so many reasons to turn bad. School and her home life back in the States weren’t a happy place for her. If she had gone bad, I wouldn't be angry at her.” Harry let Remus’ words sink in.

“You said she went up with Dumbledore once, they fought didn't they? She almost won.” Both men smiled at Harry.

“That fight was…” Sirius trails off then looks at Remus. “How old are you again?” Remus asked.

“Fifteen.” Harry answered. Remus nods at him. “You were a year old when your parents died. That was 14 years ago.” Harry rose a brow and pointed at himself.

“Fight was about me?” Remus nods.

“Dumbledore wanted to give you to the Dursley since they were your real family. I couldn't do it, I was broken and was sent to Azkaban. Remus and Yankee fought hard for you.” Sirius said looking over at Remus who held his gaze at the ground with the cup in his hands.

“They wanted to adopt you. Dumbledore refused and Yankee lost it saying that they were your real family.”

“She whipped her wand out and pointed it at him. Minerva almost fainted. Had to hold her as they dueled.” Remus said reminiscing the way he held the woman as he watched his wife duel with the most powerful wizard.

“Dumbledore, of course, won. He had more experience with magic and dueling. He was sweating though at the end and had mentioned to her that he hasn't done that for years.” Remus told them as he placed the teacup in the sink and walked back to the kitchen table.

“Wow.” Harry said once more as he smiled at them.

"What's wow?” Tonks asked as she walked into the room with Molly and a few other members behind them.

“Nothing, love. Lets have some tea, everyone.” Sirius said as the members walked inside while Remus put the kettle on with more water.

Harry found himself in Sirius' old room the next day. Sirius allowed him too, telling him to take any clothes he sees fit. Sirius had told Harry after the war they will be able to be a family again. Sirius was going to renovate the house, make it new and make it a real house to be filled with a loving family. Harry found some jumpers to his liking and folded them on the bed as he continued with his search. He looks over at the bookcases and glances over the covers. As he watches the books, he sees a paper sticking out between the hardcover books. The edge of the paper was out and carefully Harry started to pull it with his thumb and index finger, it was a black and white photo. He looks at the back to see black cursive writing on it.

Yankee and Moony’s Honeymoon - NYC 1978

Flipping it over, he saw Remus holding a girl in his arms. Remus looked so young and had less scars on his face. His hair was shaggy and he had a mustache.

Harry had to admit, you look beautiful in Remus’ arms. You were smiling and as the picture moved, you looked up at Remus who then gave you a kiss. Both of you looked ahead and the picture repeated itself. Hearing footsteps coming up the stairs, Harry quickly hides the picture in between the folded jumpers. He was sure Sirius wouldn't mind, if he took a picture of his uncle and aunt. Harry only had his parents’ picture. He would like to add this next to them.

After his charges were dropped for using magic out of school, Harry found himself thinking about Moony and Yaknee as he made his way back to Hogwarts for another year. He wanted to know so he found himself in the library, looking at old yearbooks and even wandering in the hallway of famous wizards and students. He was about to walk away when he noticed a case at the far end. Looking up he noticed it was a case of The Triwizard Tournament, 1976.

Harry thought they shut it down in 1971 due to the death toll being high. Perhaps, this was kept secret. He looked at the items on the glass case and stopped when he saw a familiar faze. It was you, looking at the bottom he read your name out loud. His eyes widened as he saw the picture moving. You were selected to compete in the Triwizard Tournament. He can see the green Slytherin uniform you wore and on the bottom, he reads the rest of the names of the competitors.

Looking at the rest of the photos framed in the case, he froze when he saw the trophy and right next to it there's a picture of you holding the trophy. You look like you've been through hell and Harry could see your clothes were dirty and ripped. Your face was dirty and he could see the dried blood on your forehead. He started to laugh when he saw you doing a rock and roll hand gesture while sticking your tongue out at the camera. It seems you had a happier ending then him. He feels himself down at the thought of Cedric's death.

Flying to London on Thestrals was the last thing Harry thought would happen but it worked. He and his friends, Dumbledore's army, made their way to the Ministry of Magic in an attempt to rescue Sirius Black since he had a vision of it. He had to save his Godfather.

Walking inside Harry recovers the object that Voldemort is after, a bottled prophecy with his name on it. Death Eaters and Lucius Malfoy and Bellatrix, ambush them. Harry felt like crying when Lucius revealed that Harry's vision of Sirius being tortured was a ruse to lure him there, this was a trap and now all of them were being held captive.

“Give it to me.” Lucius snapped at Harry. He tried his best to ignore the taunting Bellatrix gave to Neville as she held her wand to his head.

‘DON’T!” Neville yelled as she grabbed a fist full of his hair pulling his head back exposing his neck.

Harry can hear Luna let out a sob as a Death Eater grabbed her by the neck. Harry didn't want to get his friends hurt because of him. So many people have gotten hurt because of him. Giving Lucius the prophecy, they heard a whoosh sound. Harry's eyes widen when he looks over Lucius’ shoulder.

“Get away from my godson.” Sirius said to Lucius before punching him straight in the face. Harry took a step back as one by one the members of the Order came to rescue them. They fought with the Death Eaters. Remus ran with Ginny and Ron, he lets out a shout as he disarmed the Death Eater in front of him.

“Good one, James!” Remus froze as Sirius yelled as he fought with Lucius. Time seemed to slow down as Lucius was shot back and Remus saw Bellatrix appearing out of nowhere casting an Avada Kedavra at Sirius. Remus can see the spell coming out of her wand as a light casted behind Harry. His mouth dropped when he saw you behind Harry with your own wand in hand.

Sirius was pushed by the spell you caused, Bellatrix’s spell passed him hitting the wall behind them. Harry felt a hand on his shoulder and was pushed back. He looked up to see you in the flesh. You let out a shout and pointed at Bellatrix hitting her square in the chest with a Stupefy.

“LET’S GO!” He hears you scream out loud as Sirius grabs him by the arm. Remus joins them with Ginny and Ron as the rest bring the children to the center while you hit the other Death Eaters covering for them.

Harry felt Remus grab his shoulder as the rest huddled together. You raised your hands up with your wand and shouted, “Traicere!”

Harry felt like he was flying for a second before he was dropped down on the ground like a sack of potatoes. He found himself flat on his face on the concert ground. Looking up, some members of The Order were standing while others were laying on the ground like his friends were.

“Blimey!” Ron shouted as he got on his knees and wiped his face. Everyone turned when they heard Sirius let out a laugh. Harry looks over to see you hugging Sirius as Remus walks behind you.

“Y/n!” Remus said as you let go of Sirius and hugged Remus. “The fuck?!” Harry hears Tonks' curse behind him as they watch you kiss Remus on the lips. Remus held your face in his hands as he kissed you deeply.

“They haven't changed.” Sirius said, walking to Harry and helping him up. Remus held you in his arms, laying his forehead against you.

“I thought you were gone.” Harry said, looking over at Sirius.

“I'm not. Thanks to Yankee.” Sirius said, wrapping an arm around his godson's shoulder.

“Yankee! I want you to meet someone.” Sirius shouted, making Remus pull away as he glared at Sirius for disrupting. Harry watched you cover your face and leaned against Remus’ chest. After a few seconds later and quick kisses. Remus smiled and grabbed a hold of your hand, walking with you towards Harry and Sirius.

“There is someone you should meet.” Remus said as he walked you to Harry.

Harry held his breath as he got introduced to his aunt. “Love, meet Harry Potter.”

Harry saw you smile when you looked at him. It reminded him of the smile you had when taking the picture of your honeymoon. Ron and Hermione watched happily as Harry hugged the you back. He had told them about his cool aunt who used to be in House Slytherin.

Remus quickly wiped the tears rolling his face when he saw you lean down to look at Harry. You cried as you ran your finger through his dark hair before hugging him again. Remus walked to you as you reached your hand out for him. Harry felt Remus hand on his shoulder as he hugged you and him.

Harry saw Sirius walking to them as well.

“We are a family again.” Harry hears you say and it brings a smile on his face as they give him a group hug.

The members of the Order of the Phoenix sat in the kitchen of the Grimmauld Place. That’s where you had taken them. Harry and Sirius sat across from you and Remus as you spoke to them while waiting for Dumbledore.

‘He called me saying Harry was having dreams. We both went to the Ministry of Magic, I help you lot escaped while he dealing with Voldemort.”

“How is it over there in the States?” Arthur asked you, he was sitting at the far end of the table.

“It was bad for a while. Voldemort numbers decreased here but in the States it rose and muggles were being killed left and right. Lost some good friends because of it.” Remus placed a comforting hand on your shoulder and you kissed it as you raised your hand to hold his.

“The last thing we found out were some Death Eaters, we captured in California. They said that their Dark Lord had spoken about mind controlling. He is going to use it on the muggles to think he is some sort of God, to worship and to do his bidding.”

“Jesus Christ, not to mention the dark creatures as well but now hearing about these dreams. I fear he wants something or..” Harry watched as you sighed while looking defeated.

‘Someone.” You finished looking at Harry.

“There was a reason why Barty put your name in the Goblet. They did it to me but unlike you to be killed. For me it was to show them my power. Powers I didn't know I had to begin with.”

“I saw it. You won it.” Harry said with a proud smile.

“Not many people were happy with a muggleborn being the champion.” You said and Harry knew why you had stuck your tongue at the camera when your photo was taken.

“Christ, I would do anything to look at their faces again.” Remus smiled at you. Harry liked the accent you had as you spoke. It was different and the way you pronounce the words was all new to him. He wondered back to Remus' words about having a hard time in school. He wondered if you were being bullied for being different like him.

“Who’s Christ? And what's Jesus?” Harry turns to look at Luna who was sitting with Neville. She looked at you curiously. Remus and you snorted a chuckle before looking over at Sirius who was lost for words.

Harry bites a smile as Sirius quickly answers who this man is and his name. “Muggle God, dear.”

“I remember the look on your father’s face when I taught him about muggle’s religions.”

Harry listened as you spoke when Dumbledore. Voldemort has escaped but the Ministry now knows the truth, Voldemort is back. Harry and his friends were going to go back to Hogwarts when Harry decided to say goodbye to Remus and you. He followed the direction that Kreacher gave him after saying how ridiculous is was to serve a werewolf and a mudblood. Harry just ignored it.

“You're staying, correct?’ He hears Remus ask you as he walks down the hallways to the bedroom were Kreacher said Remus was staying at.

“Yes, I am. I'm not leaving any time soon. I did my duty in America. I want to come back to be with you. With Sirius and Harry. “

“I can't lose you again, Y/n.” Harry hears Remus’ voice crack.

“Oh, baby.” Harry hears you answers and stands by the door. He looks at the opening and sees you hugging Remus, arms around his torso as Remus wraps his arms around your shoulders.

Harry looks away when Remus leans down for a kiss. He’s about to walk away when he hears a soft moan. His cheeks get flustered and he’s about to leave when he hears Sirius calling out for him. His eyes widened when he saw Sirius walking down the hallway.

“Harry!” He looks over at the sound of your voice.

“What’s up? Come to say bye?” Harry nods as Remus comes behind you.

“I was hoping we all get dinner before you leave for school. I’m sure you have questions and I’m willing to answer them for you.” Harry was glad you didn’t treated him like a child.

“I would love that.” Harry smiles as you wrap your arm around his shoulders. “Will you tell me about your time in Hogwarts?” You raised a brow at Harry before looking over at Remus. “It’s not all sunshine and roses, Harry. You sure you wanna know?” Harry nods at you.

“Alright! Fuck it! Let’s go somewhere where they serve beer.” You patted Harry on his back.

“Padfoot! Babe! We are out.” You shout over your shoulder as you walk side by side with Harry.

Both men stood behind, watching as Harry and you walked down the hall. Remus had a smile on his face with his hands in the pockets of sweater as Sirius had his arms crossed over his chest.

“This is going to be an interesting dinner, Moony.” Remus nods at him.

“Yeah but he should know about our Yankee.” Sirius agrees with him on that.

Chapter 2 ->

#remus lupin x you #remus lupin x reader #remus lupin #sirius black #harry potter #harry potter has a aunt #remus lupin x american!reader #harry potter fanfiction #harry potter fandom

757 notes · View notes