#truly an enby bi icon

[empty-blog-for-lurking]

Ugh now i'm thinking.... what will happen when Lance, fucked up and irreversably changed, comes back to Earth? How would it feel for him to see his family and friends after everything hes been trough?

(if you can torture him then i might as well join the party)

(I am so sorry this is so late) Welcome aboard on langst train! Here we torture Lance as enrichment for both ourselves and our boy!

Ok i am going to be honest here, i dont really have much planned out for Lance as much as i had Kuron planned out. I do think that part of his spiral is because of differences grown between him and his family. Like i imagine this au taking place a few years after Allura "died" (yes it took years for Allura to like become alive, gather herself, gain back her strength, and search her way back home).

During that time Lance was with his family. And he's Happy! He finally got back to his family! He has achieved his dream! He even met his hero! So he should be happy or atleast at peace right?

Wrong! There is Allura's death he is mourning, he is dealing with trauma from war, he feels guilty and mourning Kuron's death, he feels aimless and directionless, he died, while his family is still alive i am pretty sure his home and earth is not in good shape.

And then there is his family. And at first glance it feels like everything is fine and dandy but as time goes on they realize that well things have changed, specifically they all have changed. Lance is more reserved, isolating himself, ticking all boxes of depression. Like it is still him but also practically a shell of himself. His family has changed too, they are clingier to him and each other while also being reserved themselves. But they are trying! Trying to be the people they used to be! Especially Lance who's acting like Nothing Happened at all!

All of them want to go Back To Way Things Were, but are too changed to do it. They all expect the other to be the same and that Lance returning would have fixed things except it did not. It really did not, if anything it kinda caused the drift to grow wider and wider.

While this is all going on Lance's powers are manifesting, and they start with growing sensitivity towards quintessence, mood swings, knowledge about things he shouldnt have, etc etc. And one day he just snaps and runs away, and no one has any idea where he is, and he is only found when Kuron is alive again (btw he went full fmab on his body, made the body from scratch, stole Kuron from Shiro's mind and succeeded, suck on that Elric bros) which results in his coma where he is actually in astral plane falling more into his powers and the horror and how it is changing him.

And the worst is he is both hating and loving it. To him he can finally do something, these powers can help him help others, right his wrongs, save others like he saved Kuron, so he just throws himself into learning more about it and about quintessence and actively choosing to let it change him more because than he will finally become something that needed for others since "Lance" was clearly not enough. But he also hates it because he just wants to go back to way things were, back to the way he used to be. And his powers are very affected by all this which further affect his mind so it is a downward spiral all the way down.

Also the powers are not good for him at all, or any humans for that matter. It is not exactly killing him anymore but it is not good for his sanity.

In short to answer your question, it will be bad, it will be so bad, no one in this house is coping at all, shit's hitting the roof my dude

[simstagramstar]

This always got to me too. And like. I feel like it’s also directly related to ~representation~ and performative activism. Like. How if there’s a queer person in media I hear from all my straight friends “omg so and so is gay/bi/trans you should watch or read this!” Ok like. Tell me more? Are they interesting? What genre is the show??? Like??? My queerness is not solely for consumption and I’d appreciate it if queer characters weren’t treated as making a show worth watching just because they’re queer. Like I still hate dramas, and if you actually know me you’ll know that no amount of queer folx in a drama will make me want to watch it. You’re reducing the character and myself to their identity label rather than actually approaching me as a person or that character as a nuanced character with traits other than their queerness.

If I was famous and someone called me an enby icon I would immediately feel the need to make several public statements about how 1) that’s not the only part of me and I hope you’ll make a judgment on me as a person rather than reduce me to one aspect of my being and 2) I’m not representative of all enby people whatsoever and you should not be basing your image on nonbinaryness on me and me alone.

I get it. I also get excited about rep (especially enby rep or polyam rep which I rarely get) and will try to support media that chooses to tell those stories even if they’re not the best pieces of media because I want to encourage the telling of more queer stories, but to truly be something I love or that isn’t strongly reductionist I need more than “omg yaaaas queer icon queen!!!”

wait what's the problem with calling Lilith a wlw icon? genuinely asking (like idk if you're sarcastic or smthn;;)

no its not about lilith i simply dislike the way sometimes us as part of the lgbt+ community make a recognizable brand out of sexualities in a way to connect and turning them relatable but at the same time patronizing and making them worthy only in very specific ways and for a specific group of people, specifically a young, chronically online demographic. You wont hear two gay persons talking about how much of a gay icon is x person in real life unless they also consume the type of media that is directly connected to the internet.

its like when someone says "x character looks gay" that's either your homophobic grandma's opinion on a stranger's appearence or yours, about this character you just found out exists. Its harmful and dehumanizing