#truly I'm so bad at understanding when im sick. this happens all the time

[kimmkitsuragi]

i slept for hours yesterday due to sickness and now my sleep schedule is truly fucked it's 4 am and i cant sleep

[lampiridaes]

HELLO!!! iys me again heheh, id like to request ermm.. tsukasa and minori, with a s/o that RARELY shows affection by physical touch, BUT gets really clingy when theyre half awake or when theyre sick,,, though when they fully regained their consciousness/health,, they get embarrassed about it? thank yew :3!!

♬ now playing: "suddenly clingy"

-> when you've got a partner as aloof and reserved as you, can you really blame them for being so surprised?

★ — chars ; tsukasa , minori

★ — notes ; MWEHEHE HELLO AGAIN LYN (i hope thats ur name and im not misreading anything somehow huhu)!!! another tsukasa and minori req... rlly love writing them so im always grateful :3 DID U KNOW I DREW MINORI FOR MY CLASS PIN THING!?!?! my teacher was nice enough to print it out for everyone hehe... still have yet to receive it bc of break but just a fun little thing that happened!! hope u enjoy <3

★ — warnings ; implied fem!reader for minori (implies that reader also attends miyamasuzaka) , otherwise none!

★ — taglist ; @akitosheart , @mintchocaur (tsukasa!!)

affiliated with @virtualbookstore ★

★ track #1: tenma tsukasa

to put it simply, tsukasa was really surprised! just the night before, you were so calm and reserved, maybe holding his hand a few times. even kissing his cheek once or twice.

... but right now? after you just woke up? you're all over him. literally. he doesn't mind, please don't get him wrong! tsukasa finds it endearing, if anything. it's just...

"tsukasa... love you..."

feeling your entire body cling onto his with such desperation... he wants to question it, but at the same time, it might risk embarrassing you and making you back away again, which isn't what he wants at all!

though the embarrassment was basically inevitable, as 20 minutes or so later, you're back to your usual self, just a little more shy this time.

"oh, goodness... tsukasa, i'm sorry, i didn't-"

"not to worry, [name]! i don't mind it one bit!"

he knows that you don't show a lot of affection normally for a reason. maybe you're too shy, maybe you're uncomfortable with it. as much as he loves it when you do, tsukasa doesn't force you to do anything! sure, he'll ask once or twice every once in a while, but he's very understanding if the answer is no.

... though, if you do it when you're fully awake for the first time... expect him to suddenly get all quiet and freeze up. it's a good thing, no worries.

★ track #2: hanasato minori

minori's way of showing her love for you is mostly words of affirmation or gift giving, so she doesn't mind that you aren't too keen on physical affection!

that doesn't mean anything bad, of course! it's not like she doesn't want to hug you, hold you, or kiss you, it's just that... she's a little shy about it. which means your lack of physical affection works out just fine.

so you can imagine how perplexed she was when you started begging for her attention, holding her hand and asking her to stay with you when you got sick.

"minori, stay a little longer... i'll feel so much better if you're here..."

minori may be an idol now, but hearing compliments from someone she truly holds near and dear to her heart... might give her a heart attack.

... but she also really adores it. after all, it makes her feel loved and special, more so since it's coming from you, of all people.

with all the training and practices she needs to attend to nowadays, minori makes sure to leave cute, handwritten notes or sweet text messages to check up on you! if you're allowed to use your phone when you're sick, that is.

when you finally recover and go back to school, it's absolutely over for the both of you. minori gets flustered easily on her own, but now that you've also lost your cool, getting all red alongside her? it's quite a cute scene from an outsider's perspective.

... the outsiders being the rest of more more jump, of course. as silly and clumsy the two of you can be, you're really the perfect pair for each other.

[sadvid]

camp camp makes me insane ramble. do not click more unless you are so so very insane

camp camp is gonna make me go fucking insane i can't fucking do this anymore there is NOTHING!!!!!! NOTHING!!!! ALL THEY DID WAS GIVE US TINY PISS DRRROPLETS WITH ONE EPISODE FINALE SAYING MAXS PARENTS DONT CARE AND DAVID SAYING YOU DONT DESERVE THAT AND NOW IVE BEEN IN THE TRENCHES FOR YEAAAARSSS. i have read fics with over 100k words i have drawn so many things and imagined so many scenarios with angst and hurt/comfort and stupid stupid thoughts that would never ever happen in the show in a million years HIS ASS IS NOT GETTING ADOPTED DADVID IS NOT REAL GWENVID IS A SICK JOKE i love them so much you don't understand. i forgot to take my meds. oh my goddddd. THERE ARE LIKE THREE CAMP CAMP FANS LEFT BECAUSE THE REST WERE NORMAL PEOPLE WHO JUST WATCH THE SILLY CAMP CARTOON THAT SAYS FUCK. they dont wonder about the possibilities of a sad ten year old rejecting happiness but slowly allowing himself to be vulnerable and loved by a counselor who is surrounded by hate and despondency but stays positive despite despite despite because nobody else will and he wants to be the source of happiness that he wish someone was for him. NO! they say HAHA the ten year old said fuck! oh my god the non swearing counselor said fuck too that's so profound! oh no the ten year olds parents bad :( HAHA NOW HES BALD!!!! and after a month of the show being gone they LEAVE because they're NORNAL!!!!! but i. I AM IN THE TRENCHESSSSS. you have no idea you have no idea. listen maybe i'm just a little insane because i am a max who needs a david JUST MAYBE! and i think this is just a lot of me projecting my desperate need for love and my simultaneous rejection and fear of it onto max. And my need for someone to keep persistently and loudly loving me no matter how much i reject it. PROBABLY!!!!! i don't care i don't care how fucking insane i sound I HAVE SO MUCH TO SAY I COULD talk about this show for hours i wish i didn't have job or school or life so i could write and anímate camp camp season 6 7 8 9 10 infinity and kill the warner brothers and write 500k word ao3 fics. IM INSANE. i am picking up crumbs and calling it a wedding cake do you understand. god i'm i i i i i i i i it's 2024 it's been too long too many years of this.... too many got damned years. every time i pick up a pencil i draw max camp camp. i have drawn david's stupid fucking face so many times its probably become the shape of my brain wrinkles. i go feral thinking about gwen's hair looks like down or what the fuck these characters last names are. Can you fucking believe i hyper fixated on a character whose last name i dont even know. hey who's that small angry fucker you're always doodling. uhh max. max who. max... camp camp. WHO?!!! DAVID?!!? DAVID ATTENBOROUGH?!?! MAX CAULFIELD?! i'm going to set myself on fire. i really truly am. i love them i live for nothing but a ghost child on an island and a silly friend trio. when will it end. when. i love them if you couldn't tell

[sourbinnie]

Hi omg I just came across ur page, I loved your recent it was so cute & now I’m dying for more comfort Hyunjin.

Can I request reader being on her period so she’s rlly irritable and then Hyunjin comes home saying he has a stomach ache and she thinks he’s just joking around so she just ignores him but then later realizes he’s being serious when he doesn’t eat dinner n feels sick so she feels bad and takes care of him.

title -> misinterpreted pair -> hyunjin x fem!reader genre -> hurt/comfort + fluff warnings -> mentions of periods + mentions of food + cursing a/n: yall i think im a sucker for hurt/comfort jinnie, thank you for you request! <3 it came out shorter than i expected but i still hope you like it ¡! :(

as if the day couldn't get more annoying, periods happen. ok, it's not like i had a lot on my plate but there's no worse sensation than your uterus kicking you like you deserve it. it was painful, annoying and overall made me feel like complete garbage. i carried through work like i could, continuing with my day like i wasn't suffering every step of the way. getting home was a task too but i managed through it and decided to throw myself on the bed, trying every single position to see if it would make the pain go away. 

i know i wasn't the easiest to deal with when i was like this but i was hoping hyunjin would understand. 

speaking of him, he was just about to come in through the door every minute now and the things that i usually get ready for him, are not there. like i said, i hope he understands that it's not my best day and he can get them on his own. i know practice must've been a lot and i truly wish he would take care of himself better.

"(y/n)?" i hear my name being called out and i don't even have the strength to get up. feels like the weight is pulling me down again. i manage to do so in a few tries but everything still spins and hurts around me. "missed you baby." he says when he sees me and gives me a hug which i have to retract because of the tightness of it all. he looks at me confused which i have to explain.

"i'm on my period and everything sucks right now." i say calmly but dying on the inside. "i'm sorry if i'm gonna be a bitch to you at any moment but right now i just need to rest."

"oh, that's okay i actually had like a stomach ache through the whole day so i get it." and i just sigh 'cause i knew he was messing with me. he always likes to do that and even with the confused look on his face, i wouldn't fall for it at all. i decided to not linger on it and go to our room to get my sweet sleep as much as i wanted to stay and cuddle with my boyfriend, i knew it would only bring pain and uncomfortability.

✉ ✉ ✉ 

getting up and being met by the moon in the night sky was not my plan all along. hyunjin was by my side, he didn't even try to cuddle with me which i thanked for but he looked a little odd. i couldn't place my finger on what it was but i had to get up and make dinner before it was too late. as i tried to concentrate in the cooking and not the pain (again), i tried to place my finger around what was going on with my boyfriend. 

could it be that things didn't go well today? but he didn't look mad or sad. he also didn't say anything about the boys (usually there's one or two comments about felix). maybe he was just tired and didn't need me on top of his business and i was just panicking over nothing.

"babe?" he asked, snapping me out of my thoughts and there was definitely something going on. he looked pale but at the same time it looked like he had a run a marathon with all the sweat and i was starting to see things better. "oh no, jagi i love your cooking but i think i'll pass today."

i placed the dinner on the table and i looked at him. he never passed on my cooking so something 100% was off today and what did i miss? as i got close to him i tried to repeat our conversation today. my hand went directly to his forehead and as everything started to make sense with him burning up, i said.

"fuck you weren't lying, you truly had a stomach ache." i felt like crying right then and there. even if i felt terrible, i still would do anything to take care of hyunjin. it hurt that i put myself first when he was hurting just as much as me. i didn't want to cry though, this was my chance to make it better unless he hated me at this very moment and didn't want me to do anything and-

"you're thinking too much and yes i did or i still do. i don't know, everything's kinda of spinning and i think i might have a fever." he said and i immediately sat him down as i looked for the termometer. thinking of every remedy and healing technique i went through my entire life as i came back and made him open his mouth. 

"i'm sorry jinnie. i should've been more careful and paid more attention to your words." i said and he wanted to say something but i stopped him. "nuh uh no moving! also i'm gonna tell the boys you're not going tomorrow." that's when he also wanted to protest but i took the termometer out and checked. 

"so? do i have a fever?" he said and i nodded as he responded with a sigh. "i can't miss practice when we're learning a new choreo though, babe you know how it is".

"but you also can't practice if you're basically running a fever and feeling dizzy, what if you pass out?" i said and i could see that he was seeing my point. "just let me text chan and then i'll have all the time in the world for you."

"but what if you get sick too?" he pouted and i just smiled because even in the sickness of it all, he still cared about me. he really was the sweetest guy i've ever met.

"if i get sick, i get sick baby, there's nothing bad about it plus i get to spend time with my favorite person." i said laying him on my lap as i messed with his hair and caressed his cheek.

he eventually fell asleep and i just couldn't stop looking at him. i decided to slowly get up without disturbing him, then i would call work and tell them that i would be taking the day off to spend it with my loved one 'cause it's what he deserved.

[iamawolfstarsimp]

Sup bitches im back

currently snowing where I am so thought I'd make a cute lil cozy fluffy fix for ya'll (plus, who doesn't like those)

Hope you all are well, I recently got sick and finally am rid of whatever sort of illness it was. but I'm just gonna get into the swing of things again now that I'm better so what better way to do that than write a fic for ya'll

but anyway, enjoy!

Sirius didn't know what this feeling was. A sort of misplacement.

It happened every few weeks or months, where Sirius would wake up and not feel right in his bones. As if his soul was uncomfortable in his body.

It wasn't like the regular winter or autumnal melancholy, but a deeper feeling than that. It weighed him down for however long it stuck around, dragging within him like some sort of ball and chain.

You could usually tell when it happened, the symptoms were pretty obvious. He was less energetic and wasn't in on any pranks or mischief making, he ate less and dressed more proper instead of his usual mushed up look, and either avoid the others like the plague or follow them around like a helpless puppy.

He rarely ever talked to anyone about it (as far as Remus knew) except for James. He would wordlessly crawl into James' bed when he felt the need to and they would talk (so he presumed, they always put up a silencing spell. He used to wish he could know what they talked about behind those curtains, to be included in their mystery conversatios. It hurt sometimes how Sirius would hide away all of the things he found ugly about himself and only show them to people he truly trusted. Of course, those memories were years ago, before they had even started dating so now he got to see plenty of Sirius' parts. Both the good and bad.)

On days or nights he felt that sense of longing or depression, he would crawl into Remus' bed and they'd talk or not talk. Whatever Sirius needed at the time.

This time was one where he wanted to talk. It was morning before classes and the others had already left. Remus was never a morning person so he stayed and slept in, snoozing his alarm every few minutes.

Sirius walked over and opened his curtains timidly. Remus turned and looked before smiling.

"Can I come in?" Sirius murmured. Remus nodded and rolled over to open the blankets for Sirius to crawl into which he did gladly.

"You wanna talk or jus' 'ere for a cuddle?" Remus slurred, blinking awake.

"Both?" Sirkha shrugged. Remus wrapped his arms around Sirius' shoulders, ducking his face into his shoulder to hug him. They stayed like that before Remus pulled back.

"M'kay, what's up?" Remus asked, resting his head on his pillow but remaining eye contact.

"I don't really know, I just-" Sirius sighed, looking away. "How do you feel upset about something that you don't feel upset about?"

"Like, I feel sad about my body right now but my head knows I'm hot and I have no reason to dislike myself but I do." Sirius explained, looking up at him.

Remus paused, letting the air settle. "Feelings and emotions can be confusing. Sometimes you can't control or rationalize them. They can be wildly incorrect but you still feel them not matter how you much you try to rid of them." Sirius looked away again. "And that's okay." Remus turned his face so that he'd look him in the eye. "Sometimes the best thing you can do is just feel, even if that's all you can do."

"No one's gonna judge you for being human and not loving yourself all the time." Remus smiled.

Sirius gave a small smile back. "What's bothering you this time?" Remus asked.

"Just my scars," Sirius replied, tracing up and down Remus' arm as he spoke. "Memories of how I get them, the pain I experienced as I got them, the house." Sirius shuddered slightly, shaking his head. "God, the house."

"I understand." Sirius knew he did but felt glad to be reassured. "My scars get to me too."

"Yeah, but, your scars are badass!" Sirius said immediately. Remus eyerolled but he was smiling. "Yours are like battle scars, they make you even hotter. Mine are just evidence of where I came from."

"If anything your scars are "battle scars", with all the fighting you and your mother had." That got a chuckle out of Sirius. "Mine are self-induced and you know that." Remus aimed a poke for Sirius' middle. Sirius swatted away his hand.

"Don't be mean."

"Don't be such a grouch." Remus snarked back, poking him again.

"Don't tickle me." Sirius grabbed his hands, or tried to.

"Oh, sorry, was I tickling you?" Sirius grinned and rolled over, hiding his face.

"You know you were, you meanie!" He said into the pillow.

"Can't help it, you're too fun to mess with." Remus leaned in and spoke in Sirius' ear, hands moving to wiggle against his sides.

"Rehemus!" Sirius shouted, arms slamming down to protect his sides.

Remus only grinned and continued. Sirius flipped over to properly defend himself but only succeeded in revealing more spots for Remus to "torture".

"No, wait, don't!" He laughed as Remus pinched along the bottom of his stomach. He threw his head back and cackled, hands weakly hitting Remus in the arms and shoulders.

"Hm? Don't what Padfoot? Honestly you're making no sense right now." Remus tutted, kissing the corner of Sirius' outstretched mouth.

"Tickle me! Don't tihihickle me!" Sirius giggled, yelling when Remus slipped his hands underneath his loose sleep shirt.

"Tickle you? Well if you insist." Remus shook his head and drilled his fingers into the bottom of Sirius' ribs, kissing different places his mouth could find. Sirius was lost in his own mirth, back arching, squeaking all the while squirming like mad.

Remus backed off and just trailed his fingertips across Sirius' sides lightly. He tugged up his shirt to inspect the scar that ran across Sirius' side, three prosice lines cut evenly on his left side, his mother's doing. He traced the lines a few times till Sirius caught his breath.

"You're an awful boyfriend." Sirius scowled, but there was amusement in his eyes. Remus only laughed and kissed him again.

"Better?" Remus raised his eyebrows.

"No, but I'll accept your measly apology for now because we have class in twenty minutes." They both hopped up from the bed.

"But I expect a hundred more later!" Sirius shouted from the bathroom. Remus shook his head in the moment but fulfilled Sirius' request and some.

Hope you liked!

[krash-and-co]

hey krash, i wanted to reach out and say that i'm so sorry that you got such a hurtful reaction from one of the l&co servers for speaking up about something that genuinely needed to be addressed. i won't badmouth anyone in particular but this is not the first time this fandom has dogpiled someone over a misunderstanding, and when it happened to me i had severe anxiety over it for about a week even after it was resolved, and eventually left because of it. it left a pretty bad taste in my mouth for the fandom in general, so i mostly just stick to my small group of mutuals now lol. i wish this fandom truly was different from other fandoms, but this kind of thing is unfortunately inevitable once something reaches a certain level of popularity. but that certainly doesn't make it okay, and you didn't do anything to deserve the reaction you got. i hope you can feel peace about it soon, and i'm sorry again that it happened at all. 🫂

(please don't feel pressured to answer this if you'd rather the matter be left alone, i totally understand. i just wanted to send you an ask because i didn't know if you're comfortable with dms.)

hi im so sorry i forgot to answer!!! thank you so much this means so much to me. 💙💙💙 i read this for the first time when i was feeling pretty attacked and it really cheered me up <3

hmm other people have been telling me about how they got attacked in this fandom too. and maybe this shouldn't have surprised me as much as it did. but it's something fans never talk about and claim doesn’t exist, so i thought it didn’t. i was horribly fooled lol. as, uh, i am about to rant about; do you mind? u don’t have to read it, i won’t be offended, but halfway thru answering this ask it turned into a rant i wanted to release into the world lol, so sorry about that 😭😭😭

very important disclaimer!!! this is NOT about everyone. ABSOLUTELY NOT. most of you are absolutely amazing people, and i assure you if ur worried this is about you, it’s prob not lol

ANYWAYS!!!

im kind of feeling i was betrayed?? ig? i rlly believed everyone was so kind, and look what i know now. it genuinely seems like people are gaslighting themselves. how else do they only see our ‘harm?’ yeah, our fandom is known for being passionate, but saying we’re known for kindness is starting to make me sick. maybe we were, i know a lot of us still are, but throwing that out there in the middle of your hypocritical hate post seems like justification for the shit things people have been saying. you can say no wrong so long as you’re here. only people who don’t agree with you. so yeah, fuck krash and ljc and anyone else who doesn't agree!!! that totally shows how kind you are and how much you loved the fandom before we messed it up. nobodys visibly mad, cuz we're too scared to say shit!!!

i’ve seen too many examples of the contrary from the “victims,” wailing about how cruel we are the second they disagree with someone. (in a highly hypocritical manner, at that.) “everyone was so happy before this!” no, they weren’t, that’s why i brought it up. “stop bringing hate to this fandom! now let me fucking berate you!” do you even hear yourself? “nobody even cared before, we were all content!” we weren’t all content, we were just silent. it sometimes looks the same.

someone even declared they were leaving the fandom because ‘one person wanted to stop show saving efforts entirely because it traumatized them, and this is no longer a safe place.’ like, what? where did you even get that? for one, there were at least two of us posting together, and that’s just barely knowing anything about what’s happening. thats not even touching on how one of us (idk who the op of that post was talking about, it’s a 50/50 lol) made the fandom an unsafe place for our personal gain. what?

hella kind. hella safe on their part.

another said they saw only old fans agreeing about this so it’s just us being pissed about change. it’s us hating the show. me and ljc being upset about not being the only “big blogs” any more. our fandom is only for the elite, etc. fuck us. yet ljc is getting blackmailed. we’re getting hate replies. friends that try and help get attacked. misinformation spread. how did that even happen? we never once tried to hurt anyone; thank you to those who understand.

but to some, WE’RE the ones in the wrong.

do they SEE themselves? how hypocritical all of this is? or are their heads that far up in the ass of their petition and beloved fake idea of this fandom that they care about more than all of us?

now, this is where i add another “not everyone” message. not everyone is like this, this is not me saying i hate the petition or people who support it. hell, i signed the petition. twice. and once more from my mothers email.

i don’t regret the i love you posts i made, because i still do love this fandom, i am still absolutely here for the rest of yall. but DAMN if we weren’t hiding something under happy Save The Show, I Love Locknation! messages. perfectly smiling faces until they bite. i was surprised to see how many people did.

as if our previous problems weren’t enough, now it turned into this lol. no, that’s a lie, it didn’t. it already was, and i HATE THAT.

ig im kinda spoiled, i never really experienced hate like this from this fandom before. but now i know it happened BEFORE too, and that just pisses me off. it hurts coming from a group who says they love us. genuinely wacko (not the fun kind) behavior :[

i know this isn’t everyone’s experience, but it is mine, and enough others to make me wanna say this. and this is ofc me and @lucy-j-carlyle 's brand of hate, not yours. but it does happen and the constant chant that IT DOESN'T IT DOESNT IT DOESN'T isn't helping anyone. and now I know.

idk what im even saying anymore lol, sorry for ranting. what i mean to say is, thank you, and i wish things were better. and i love you kind people. im happy it’s most of you.

[dutifullyshamelessearthquake]

holy shit IM LOSING MY MIND??? I’m done it’s over and

I- I’m running out of ways to express my obsession with your Sickfics… I need to invent new words? Or new ways to scream in text form because I need you to understand how fucking AMAZING this new fic is 😭😭😭😭

It’s so damn good???? It’s SO SATISFYING????? HELLO?? oh my word cyno cyno cyno what an absolute mess you are.🥺 poor poor thing!! I love everything in this fic. I love their relationship and how comfy they are together - how much Cyno loved spoiling nari (and tighnari deserves it let’s be real) I love the use of implied both ends!! I feel like it works really well in this case and it’s subtle but I love the implication that maybe Cyno was coming down with a bug before hand since he wasn’t feeling hungry? But then it’s like the heavy food expedited that process. I love the descriptions of fullness and how he just- very quickly - is NOT okay anymore. UHG HIS ANXIETY??? you captured the thought process perfectly of just being seen and being seen too much and the constant what ifs. Idk if Tighnari knew cyno hated being sick in public but he ABSOLUTELY gets the picture now.

OMG and Cyno just refusing to be sick in the public restroom sent me. I was genuinely shocked he managed to not lol 😂😅 like you know you just KNOW that’s so much worse feeling in that situation. Tighnari must have been so concerned and absolutely not buying it at all. Cynos little “I’m fines” when he sounds like he’s close to tears STOP. AH!! And the weakness??? OML his faintness was just so good and I’m feral over all the little details with nari being like “ok if he doesn’t sit he’s going to collapse it’s time for mom mode” and how he takes command in those moments. So damn GOOD. don’t even get me started when Cynos finally sick I can’t. My heart. Just all the worst things he wants to lay down his stomach feels so sick and now there is puke everywhere and- It was such a perfectly written scene 🥺🥺🥺 and the little FOX TOY THAT HE CUDDLES??? I’m gonna DIE?? IM TRULY DEAD?? I LOVE how attentive Tighnari is with his fussing and then very tactful more subtle support, just giving him the toy so Cyno can hug something on the way home cuz even if Tighnari knows cyno would never in public he knows him and knows he wants to be held rn and i -

I believe it’s 100% a tummy bug and not the food and that the ‘heat’ he was feeling was for sure fever and nausea and that maybe it wouldn’t have been this bad but anything he ate that day was going to more or less rot inside him. I have no doubts he was not done with the restroom for a number of reasons after getting home but I absolutely know he was 1000% times more at peace. Except for him replaying the events in his head for all eternity.

I’m truly never going to recover.

amazing fucking work. I’ve already re read this and I will re read again and again and yeah. That’s it. I’m just. Simply. Deceased. 😭😭😭

Thank you for this gift 😭🩷

I AM SCREAMING, I WOKE UP TO THIS IN MY INBOX THIS MORNING AND I WASN'T ABLE TO STOP SMILING AS I READ THROUGH IT 😭 You have no idea how much these comments mean to me, you made my whole day with this!

I am SO HAPPY you enjoyed it this much!! Allow me to get sappy for a moment, it already makes me so happy that people are actually reading what I'm creating, but knowing people enjoy it so much?? It makes me feel all warm and fuzzy and it makes me so happy. I enjoy writing sickfics so much, it's just a fun, self-indulgent hobby that I also happen to post online. And just knowing something I created, purely by having fun, is being enjoyed this much?? All the happy emotions!!

Alright, happy sappy earthquake out, let's scream about Cyno!

HE IS, he is such a mess, this poor boy 🥺 I definitely had it in my head that he was beginning to come down with something before the date even started, but having a heavy restaurant meal just made things go south so much faster. I'm really glad to hear I was able to pull off the implied both ends without it seeming too out of place!! It definitely felt like if I was going to have it anywhere, this was the fic for it, Cyno had a very unhappy stomach. He went from "i can handle this" to "i am NOT okay" in the blink of an eye and I feel so bad for doing that to him. THE ANXIETY! THE VULNERABILITY!! He can't stand that other people might just THINK of him as vulnerable, the smallest sign of weakness and he wants no eyes on him immediately. I definitely think Tighnari knew he didn't like being sick in public, but he didn't know it was this bad. He definitely hadn't expected Cyno's anxiety to go through the roof like that.

He BARELY held it together in the bathroom, I think Tighnari was just as surprised that he didn't throw up. Oh Cyno baby, I know you didn't want to get sick in a public bathroom, but you could've spared yourself getting sick in the parking lot. You just know he's going to replay this event in his head a million times thinking where he should've done something differently to make the day somewhat less mortifying.

THE LITTLE FOX!! PLEASE THAT WAS SUCH A FUN LITTLE DETAIL TO ADD. I have a feeling that little thing is going to become a big comfort item for Cyno. Only private because you know he would NEVER let anybody outside of Tighnari know that he even has a stuffed animal, but it'll become a massive comfort for him. We love Tighnari just knowing. He's so good at handling these situations and we adore him for it. He's giving Cyno so many hugs when they're home.

I definitely agree with you there, boy was feverish. His body temperature was all over the place, first the hot flashes and sweating, and then he was feeling shivery?? He's definitely sick sick 🥺 He's definitely not going to be done with the bathroom for a while. In my head I imagine even the drive home is going to be hell, I mean can you imagine being in a moving car on the road when your stomach is feeling as bad as his was? Yeah they definitely pulled over more than once.

ARGH THANK YOU SO SO MUCH! I'm genuinely happy you enjoyed it as much as you did!! Again, thank you so much!!

[sadowlswriting]

"Do you think that everyone whose handled a little danger holds aggression and force between their joints and is embedded in their muscles?

There's a time and a place when those things are needed and learning when they are needed is a thing one must learn.....or that aggression and force that possesses their limbs will be overuled by guilt. Learn peace and gentleness, separate the good from the bad, balance is needed or things topple over."

"So, you're saying I need balance? Calm the chaos inside me?........can you teach me how to? To separate the good from the bad? To calm the storm?"

"Teaching-.....It's something you have to learn to do yourself, I could tell you but it's something you'd never truly understand, till you do it. I could tell you that there's a bunch of shapes inside you and you need to sort them out one by one and put them in their own boxes. I could tell you there's a safari of animals ravaging at each other and it's your job to walk through it with a net and place them all in their own areas. I could tell you there's a house inside you where the lights don't work, and you must search through it with faulty flashlights and light candles to guide the way, as you walk through it half blind.

But even if I did, I could tell you that the goal is to have the house completely lit up, illuminated in light that you can see it through your eyes.....that the animals must be separated and kept contained, the shapes must stay sorted. Do you understand?

But....these things will never stay organised, things happen and the shapes will mix again, the animals will rampage, the candles will burn out, or a window will shatter and the breeze will blow them out. It's a cycle that repeats, and as you go through it many, many, many times....you must learn to find something to hold tightly onto, something that makes you keep the cycle going, something that makes you not give up....Do you understand that?"

"But what if it becomes too much? What if the darkness is too dark? The animals too wild? The shapes too complex? ......What if im tired? What if im sick of the cycle?"

"When it becomes too much....you rest, take a break....learn not to fight against the darkness too much, don't fight against the animals, don't throw a temper tantrum and throw the shapes everywhere. Find a small peace in it....don't get too close, don't find comfort in it. The darkness, the animals, the shapes....they are not your home and you don't stay there for longer than needed, till you gain the energy back to start again. Light the candles, sort the boxes, grab the net. You'll find, you're scarred from the animals, and burnt from the candles, your fingers ache from picking up the shapes and the pattern of the box is indented into your skin. But you take a break.

And sometimes, the thing you hold onto, to not give up, leaves.....

then you find another, and again, the cycle repeats....because it must."

"Yeah......sometimes i want to throw everything away, burn it all down and start fresh, give in to the darkness and let it consume me. Then what?.....What if someone could help guide me? Show me light when all i see is darkness? someone to help find balance? to hold my hand and guide me through the chaos?"

"hm, you're not alone in that. Wanting to tear it all apart and make the pieces of your life and yourself into something else, something better.

But....I don't know. I'm a pussy. Never been brave enough to find out what happens when you do tear it all down.

Having someone assist, someone can help.....if you trust them enough to not damage the, already weakened, parts inside you, more than they already are."

"But I'm scared.....what if I fail? What if it goes wrong?"

"I don't know....... I don't know. If I did, I'd gladly tell you and save you from this spiral you fell into, but I don't, unfortunately. I can only do so much, though I wish I could do more.

The answer to your questions, you need to find for yourself. I can only tell you what I've learnt on my own journey in life....what you need to know, you'll know, eventually, in time. Be patient, frustration will only fuel the chaos in which you struggle to juggle correctly."

"Okay.....I'll try."

"Take it bit by bit. There's no need to rush things that don't have deadlines. Moments are moments, live in them. You're here, and you're safe.....I've got you."

Sleep, for now......I'll stay.... and I'll be here when you wake."

-Owl.

[taegularities]

Hello lovely Rid 💕💕💕

First of all...

okaaaaay 👀👀👀 I don't like seeing sad Jungkook (or sad Rid for that matter) but short hair Jungkook makes me crazy, so I'll take it.

Also I wanted to ramble about who I'm a bigger simp for, since you posted that cruel poll making me choose.

So basically, I'm really really obsessed with c&f Jungkook and I can't even pinpoint the exact reason why? I've said this before but I've never been more whipped for a man who I don't fully trust so quickly. There was just something about him that had me from the beginning, even with his very questionable looking intentions. So I'm a big simp for him in a more base level way? Like it's almost involuntary lmaooo.

And then for cmi Jungkook... I mean he has my whole heart. He might be my favourite fictional Jungkook ever actually... Literally all sides of him (that we've seen so far) I'm in love with. Just writing about him right now has me going 🥺🥺🥺. I'm ready to protect him at all costs and he also makes me crazy (in all kinds of ways). maybe i'll save the love letter for him for the cmi anniversary i mean what?

I love both of them a lot though. Thinking about both the c&f epilogue and cmi8 gives me emotional whiplash.

Other than that though, how are you doing, Rid? I saw that you're feeling a little sick and once again I'm ready with all the virtual blankets and tea and hugs since I can't take care of you irl 🥺 I hope you get through it very very soon!!!

I've been feeling very emotional and a little melancholic myself recently. But today I listened to d day and it actually made me feel loads better, Yoongi just always knows how to comfort 🥺 I also got started on a paper that I'm excited to write, for which I received unexpectedly good feedback while I was still at the planning stages! Trying to focus on the good things and set up a good base for when my exam season starts.

I hope you feel better soon Rid, sending you all of my love 💞💞💞

IVI LOL, you really do point out the subtlest things !!! did not think anyone would catch that haircut bit, but look at you :'))

i think you're a simp for c&f jk bc you know a good man when you see one... despite his initially questionable behaviour, he truly is a sweet bean who tends to act monstrous (in bed) at times lmao so i understand the obsession... :')

and i know, cmi jk is just 😭 thank you for loving him so much, tbh he might be my fav jk i've written so far too :(( my lil baby :(( and i can't wait for his return :((((

thank you, ivi !! :') i hate that this happens, idk why i get colds so frequently ?? like i spent most of yesterday and today napping and it sucksss lmao i want to be productive, too :') but i'll take the blankets i love you 🤍🥺 so happy you've been well !! despite the melancholy... i get that feeling. there must be something in the air, bc everyone's been very emotional these days. i'm so glad you have stuff you can look forward to, though, and i hope that mood stays bc you deserve it 💕

(also i've been wanting to say this — i know you said i don't need to be, but im so sorry for being slow with answering at times... you send such thoughtful and incredibly kind thoughts and then i feel bad. but i want to answer just as thoughtfully and the current time has been beating my ass lmao sorry again but i love you rambling and will always get to it bc i love you so fkn much 😭🥺🤍)

[not-quite-girl-nor-quite-boy]

A/N so this is a little different from my usual works but I just sorta thought of this one so yeah. Happy holidays everyone, enjoy a Christmas, fluffy, angsty I guess, familial fic.

Have fun <3

"here you go Cass." Dean said handing him a messily wrapped present covered in gold and red shiny wrapping paper with a big bow on the top.

"for Sam?" He asked moving his present filled hand toward Sam.

"no Cass, its for you hun." Dean smiled albeit confusedly. Cass sighed sadly looking at the floor

"I don't understand." He mumbled.

"hey, that's ok Cass, it's your first Christmas, what don't you understand?" Sam asked patiently.

"I thought gifts were given to loved ones." Dean looked at him almost offended.

"hold on." Sam said to dean. "Cass, did you get us gifts?"

"I'm sorry, I see now why you would not want them. I apologise."

"no no no Cass. Ok how do we do this?" Sam asked himself.

"Cass, why would you love us and us not love you? I tell you I love you all the time." Dean said.

"yeah but... Why would you mean it?" Cass asked. "you say it when I say it first. I thought that was just social protocol." He reasoned.

Sam looked at dean shocked and outraged.

"dean! You only say it when he says it first are you kidding me?!" Sam shouted angry.

"yeah well... That doesn't make it less true or constant." He said sheepishly to Sam before turning to Cass. "you know that right?"

"how could he when he only hears it as an echo?" Sam said. He was defending Cass with avengance.

"hold on." Dean mumbled eyebrows furrowed.

"no I'm not done yelling at you yet!" He said.

"no no seriously. Stop." Dean said.

"did you say why would that be true?"

"well... Yeah." Cass mumbled.

"why?" Dean said.

"well. I'm a broken angel dean. Why would you love me? What is there to love?" cass asked genuinely, that was what really shook dean, Cass truly believed what he was saying to him, he thought himself unlovable because he wasn't what he once was.

"shut up cass." dean said.

"i-im sorry." he said looking down.

sam watched the conversation develop quietly.

"you should be.-"

"Dean-" sam started.

"how dare you. how could you possibly see yourself that way?! i love you cass! i love you so much. i dont care about that. when you were a real angel or whatever the hell you wanna call it you were a dick! i didnt love you until you started caring, until you had and expressed the emotions you were previously punished for feeling. Cass we love you so much. i love you so much. how could you possibly think we wouldnt love you. how could you think that. i am so totally in love with you cass. everything i am is thanks to you. not because you saved me from hell but because you save us, you help us, you heal us, and you heal the people i love. i dont love you out of gratitude cass, i love you becuase even wehn it ends badly you try to help people no matter what and if it ends worse off you hate yourself, you feel the guilt even when it isnt your fault. when something bad happens that knowledge kills you. like, do you rmeber when i got sick and you were human and you stayed up for almost a week taking care of me and you hated yourself for not being able to heal me?" Cass nodded slightly, "do you remember when i jumped into a hunt the second i could and ended up having to catch you when you passed out from exhaustion, dehydration, starvation because you thought that you didnt matter if you couldnt help others?" cass nodded again. "do you remeber what i said to you when you woke up?"

cass nodded again before saying, "you said that it didint matter who else was in trouble, it didnt matter that i wasnt an angel because you needed me and that you loved me. you said that i couldnt help anyone if i didnt take care of myself because id end up dead and that if that happened you wouldnt know what to do with yourself." cass finished.

"and thats why i love you, because you would blow up the very ground you stand on to make something right, you would put the life of a caterpiller before your own. i love you because no matter what happens you prioritise others and no matter what happens you never stop lovong the little things."

"and its a good thing too other wise dean would never get any action." sam joked.

"Sam! get out, im busy!" he commanded, its a good thing sam was already leaving because he was too busy laughing at himself to hear him.

"ignoring sams untrue and incorrect comment cass, i love you. do you understand?" dean asked. scootching towards cass who nodded. "I love you too." he said before wrapping him in a tight hug, cass didnt really like kissing, hugs he loved and sex he didnt ming but kissing was too strange, he couldnt stand the feeling of someone slese toung in his mouth, said it felt like worms, so dean kissed him on the forehead or on the mouth without tounge, if it made cass happy he was more than happy to comply. but cass knew he was loved and that was what he needed to hear.

"so what did you get me anyway?" he asked.

"oh cass, youre gonna love it." dean said as he handed it over. cass unpeeled the gold and crimson paper his smile positively beamed. “Merry Christmas!”

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH" cass screamed, dean smiled and sam came in running.

"What is it? What happened?" he asked. he looked at cass with the bee themed pj jumpsuit slippers, eyemask and photo frame unwrapped in his lap.

"So you like it?" dean asked.

cass rushed over to dean and hugged him so hard dean had to check his ribs. he chuckled at his verocity.

"my god i love you."

So yeah. Enjoy. Just thought it would be interesting and it kinda makes sense to me that cass would have a terrible family sense given that the angels were really aggressive and not exactly loving, so yeah. Any thoughts? Let me know :)

Send me prompts please. I have no inspiration :)

[daintydreams00]

a little vent,

dont open unless you accept the heightened emotional state I am that is simply exacerbated by my mental illnesses that get massively triggered by events such as political elections

tw some mention of OCD/SI

"God has a plan for us all. God knows best. Trust in God."

I've been trying so so so so hard to not be a cynic right now. SO hard. But it just hurts me because why, why God is this the path you want for the US. Why is being so fearful on election days for the past however many times the norm? Why are people genuinely fearing for their lives rn? Why is our future destined to this fate? Is God not meant to care for us, care for our wellbeing? If God has a plan for us, why does this plan have so much misery, pain, and such a desolate future in store? I just cant fathom God to set this as our future; I cant believe that God wants harm to people of color, women, lgbtq+, the non-wealthy, etc. I truly don't. I truly don't think that can be possible.

And yet the current outcome is so dreary, I can't seem to lose some hope. But maybe God does have a plan for us, maybe this is something grander than our immediate existences. The only way I can reckon with this currently is the belief that God is using this election to show us what happens when we don't trust in him. Not in the strictly "im religious" sense, but more so in the Christian values. Kindness, carrying and loving your neighbors, respecting women, etc. Both the present and past of the US have been ripe with hate, prejudice, discrimination, and sinful rhetoric and I can't help to think that maybe this election may seem like an initial "win" for some people, but ultimately i think the consequences of it will be an eye opener for the majority of Americans, but oh why does it have to come at the cost of so many people's livelihoods.

I don't think God is petty. I don't think God toys with our lives. And I do think that this is one of those many historical moments in which He exemplifies the consequences of human free will being so easily swayed by evil. I hope I can one day make out a better understanding of why this is all happening like this, but honestly this is as good as I'm going to get. I trust in God, but I just pray that he protects us all. People are frightened and worried for their livelihoods, while some are fueling their budding rage and hate with the newfound success. And I just wish, at the end of it all, this is as far as American division gets. I don't know how basic aspects of a human existence have become so controversial and contentious, and it's terrifying. It's terrifying to have a leader who so openly speaks terribly about women. It's terrifying to have a party majority who has been predicted to change so much of the future in such a negative manner. But it's especially terrifying to see how people on the internet just act like this is a game, and that "they won" and now troll and spread hate under people's posts expressing their fears for their future. I thought no person could truly be evil, but whether it's ignorance or true evil, I just can't fathom people being so insensitive to their fellow citizens' worries and livelihoods. But clearly, there's so many of them on the internet and in real life. </3

And in all of this, my OCD, SI, and ED have just gotten so much worse. I feel sick thinking about the possibility that this outcome may have been my fault. Because I didn't do what I should have done this past week. Because I didn't pray enough, fast enough, exercise enough. I don't even want to write more about that because I feel so guilty and so evil and just such a bad person. But at least my arms are all bruised up and legs stinging so I've enacted my punishment for you all </3 im sorry i feel so guilty for this being my fault and I cant shake it.

I guess on the bright side, I think im going to have restriction motivation for the next millennia because of how men being proudly and openly misogynistic triggers me to the core. Starving to be desexualized. Starving to be infertile. Starving to exist in a plane men don't know of. Starving because the curves I have now are enough reason to be frightened for my future. Starving because I am evil. Starving because that's the only way to bring back my childhood.

I pray God protects us dearly. I pray for these upcoming years to not be as tumultuous as forecasted. I pray for everyone to be able to have their livelihoods and dreams safe and possible. I know He has a plan somehow, and I just pray that plan minimizes the people hurt. </3

[1d1195]

Definitely get the whole vibe of everyone relying on you! I basically have the same role in my family too :/ While i would literally do anything for my family(not extended family bc thats a DIFFERENT story lol) it is very draining especially when at times it may not be reciprocated in a way that actually helps. So youre not alone in that and it doesn't make you a bad person for saying those things either! And yeah i did say im the eldest daughter! I only have one sibling which is my brother but he's only 2 years younger than me. We are actually very close and i love him to death! BUT what's wild is that personally I don't think we are too similar but apparently we are according to others lol We are also both Aquarians which is also WILD!

ANYWAYSSSSSS That is kinda sad to think about it like that :( But honestly I think you would love to see and particpate in a Day of the Dead celebration! It's just a different way of viewing death and th process of it like making the offerings and decorating is so fun! Well at least when we do it we cook/buy our loved ones fave foods and it comes naturally the nice memories we have shared with them. also idk if i've mentioned this but i LOVE flowers like obsessed! so I enjoy that aspect too! Plus it really does kick off your b-day month so IT"S A WIN! also WE ARE THE SAME once again, i have ALWAYS been obsessed with my ancestry too! Have you taken one of those DNA tests or Ancestry tests??? And you can ask whenever/whatever you want!

I say you could totally write a cool biography or even like a memoir! I think that would be such a fun little project even if it's just for yourself!

like bestie you don't understand, this man's arms look GOOD so i get the vibe of liking forearms! it's totally not weird! I mean I have a thing for noses(according to my friends bc i have never truly noticed 😭) and hands! Or maybe something might be wrong with me ��

It was for a good deal too! It was $10 for a HARDCOVER of Oscar Wilde's "The Picture of Dorian Gray" and im exicted since it looks like I might actually start this book lol Have you read anything fun or new recently?

ALSO SAM THE RIGHT HERE EXTRA WAS SO GOOD 😭I forgot how cute these two are and how perfect they are 😭 Harry in this is just so 😭 i love a good sick fic and the comfort of it all! BUT HER SAYING I LOVE YOU FIRST!? Why did i think Harry already said that?? lol But I found it so cute it was her and its so perfect the way you wrote about how knowing that Harry loved her back was like the last thing for her to FULLY be herself! loved it so much Sam, you never disappoint!-💜

That's so funny. My extended family is a mess too. I was actually discussing it with one of my aunts on my mom's side this weekend. My dad's side is A LOT™ Like idk what happened we were discussing it and I was like "wow, i love these people but I do not like them. wtf." That's cool you have a brother, I always wanted a brother. But I'm def the son my parents never had either lol. I bet you're a killer older sister. My sister is also ~2 years younger than me and that's so wild how similar we are! My sister is way more outgoing than I am, she's probs smarter, and infinitely more confident (I said double it and give it to the next one in the womb). What's your brother like? It's funny you think you're not like him but others do! I think my sister and I are different but we have SO many similarities.

I've done 23 and Me! The results were unsurprising. I was hoping for more nitty gritty details but I'd like to do the Ancestry one too because then I could maybe get some of the more interesting info I want. Okay you've convinced me. Maybe I'll write a memoir 😂 OH I LOVE FLOWERS TOO! I bought a headband at TJMaxx and wore it. My coworker (Spanish teacher) loved it! It had really pretty flowers and I know I mentioned it last but I think Coco is one of the most BEAUTIFUL Disney movies on the planet and it's DEFINITELY the flowers. That's a beautiful tradition--eating their favorite food 😭 that's so so nice. I hope I can participate somehow sometime that would be really cool.

Noses and forearms aren't we a pair!? 😭

Picture of Dorian Gray is on my bookshelf! I tried reading it years ago but I struggled. It's on my shelf though so it means it's gonna be read by the end of the year hahahaha Let me know how you like it! 😊

HAHAHAHAHA I always go back and reread when I write a new part to check for plot holes but I REALLY had to go back and read to see if he said it (if you read between the lines of the original part he def says it) I feel like I kinda struggled falling in love--as much as I write about it I feel like there's something wrong with me--love in books and the way I feel love is very different. Idk maybe I'm weird. I've been fantasizing about love since I was 11/12/13. Maybe I set myself up for failure in believing the stories more than reality. ALL OF THAT was to say that I think I wrote her just finally feeling at peace to be herself, to really feel in love because it's something I always struggled with.

Thank you for being the utmost supportive in everything 💕

xoxo

[dxsertrot]

I don't think the absolute horror of my brother's situation truly set in until last night. I've been struggling with him with this for years, and he's a heavy topic on mine and my family's tongue. Has been for the last few years now. I was looking at a photo my mother took of the three of us on Christmas and I burst into tears. He's such a shell of a human, hardly even alive. He's plagued by endless skin issues that he lacks the motivation to fix, his brain has been dulled by years of alcohol abuse. He's jobless, friendless, and sick. Mentally and physically. He's nothing like the person he used to be. He couldn't even properly bend down to take a picture with us, and the look in his eyes is just totally dead. He lays in bed all day, lays in the bath all day. Barely eats, barely sleeps, hardly ever goes anywhere. He gets random jolts of motivation to fix his life and then in less than a week it's gone. He's 31. My parents don't know what to do with him. He's too unwell to kick out. He's literally in horrible shape. My brother used to be my best friend and always the first person I wanted anyone to meet. I took pride in my similarities to him. People always loved my brother, he's such a kind and empathetic soul. He listens to people, relates to people, and he was always so funny and full of life. He's nothing like that person anymore, you only see fragments of that in him now. Often times I wonder if my parents will discover him dead when they get home from whatever outing they've done that day or weekend. It'd awful to witness someone you love so dearly become so undone like this. I find myself frustrated and angry with him a lot. I feel like I'm talking to a child when i talk to him. He used to be my big brother, but now he's just so small. And nothing I say or do helps. Lately my conversations with him have gotten more ill tempered, mostly because I know it won't go anywhere and he will never listen. It feels like I've already lost him. Its not that hes dead to me but he's totally dead to the world, sometimes picking up the scraps of the old life he left behind by trying to reconnect with old friends and family. But he's more so a point of concern than a point of contact. Everybody desperately wants to help him and yet need to keep him at an arms length. It's like he's waiting for somebody to do something for him, but if there was anything that could have been done it would have happened in ten fold. It's sadly all up to him, and that's horrifying, because nothing will ever get done if it's all him. Sometimes I mourn and other times I'm cold to it. Being around him is hard. It used to be my favorite part of the day. My brother used to be my person through and through. We mirrored each others best traits. We used to look so much alike, and behave so similarly. Now it feels like I'm light years ahead of him and I can't seem to grab him to pull him along with me. He won't move. And so sometimes my successes leave me riddled with guilt. I've developed this insane superstition that if im doing well he's going to do bad forever. And if I do bad then maybe he will finally do good. But I understand that's the form my guilt is taking shape in because my mind can't find a reason for me to feel guilty, so it invents one. There's so much shame involved in this. The horrible feeling that when people meet him they secretly belive it's so awful of you to let someone you love end up so poorly. I cannot imagine my parents guilt. I think the older I get the more I realize just how hard it is to love so much. My brother, and my sister, and my good friend whom I have unrequited love for, and my ex gf, and my aunts. My cousins. My parents. I think that's why I spent so long trying to be cold and cynical to everything. I've finally opened my heart up and in the same breath it feels like it's being torn to shreds.

[kpophubb]

Good morning sunshine🧡💛💛💛

How did you sleep?

2:26 📨

Utube dilemma 👹

Lifestyle insp

Memories 🔐

Me if I were

US 🎵

lixie is sending u new pics ~~ 🫧 ; for good mood uuuu 🤘🏻🫵🏻💋 ;

volunteers to take care of you when I'm gone;;; I wanted to attach my piccc but I'm not pretty😭 I know you will argue, because of your angelic nature,

Wishing you as always I lovely day can a way to hear from you ~,hope to talk to you soon ❤️Wait for me❤️

* 🐁 🌙 * hope all the links are workin 🙈

ꕺ♡ 💌 : ….𝕿𝖔 𝙼𝚈 нуυηวιη … ꕺ♡

♡..hi my darling!! First to tell you that all the links are working🥺 and I viewed everything and I’m so 💖💖 the felix smiling pics, voice message on bubbles, gyu kisses and gyu volunteer 🥹 how on earth are you soooo cute?? You always know how to make me smile <3

♡..I know many people find felix’s voice super sexy ( and I do too sometimes) but most times, it’s just so soothing and relaxing for me tbh. He’s my comfort person. I see him more as my ball of sunshine and my sweet dose of serotonin so hearing his voice always calms me down and relaxes me. Especially the good night messages and words of consolation. 🥺🤍

♡.. I liked our playlist, my love. I’ll be hearing all the songs soon (even tho some of them I already heard). I am so in love with the emojis you added as titles aww.

♡…my week has been so so¿ I mean at the beginning it was super fun bc I felt so active and healthy, my best friend came over at my place and we spent the whole day together 😍 and then the day after, it was my niece’s 6 months. So we had a home party w some guests and I dressed up and had a lot of fun with her! But then..I fell super sick and now my health and mood is all SO BAD I have been snapping at everything bc I feel like crap 💔

♡..your memories board is so cute..😭🤍 it’s melting my heart. I am so flattered and ngl my eyes feel watery at the amount of love you’re showing me. It feels so heart warming to see you have captured every detail of our conversation and I’m just🥹🥹 and Awwh! Yes 100% I’m real. If you ever wanna see me or hear my voice to confirm, let me know okay?? I don’t mind declaring to you confidently that you’re super precious to me and I’m and will always be here.

♡…I also take inspiration from YouTube videos..tiktok videos and mostly Pinterest! They all inspire me and motivate me for my dream self lol. I have 2 acc on Pinterest , one for kpop+ anime & the other one is my personal acc. It’s here if you’re interested to know more about me personally haha.

♡…I’m very happy to be here for you. I feel so glad I can make you feel safe and accepted cause that’s all I ever wanted to make you feel. 💛 I’m still glad I could be there during your bad times those months, and I could see you getting up. I can’t wait to be here for you through the rest of your growth.

♡..and oh my god anonie!! That’s scam!! Pls go reclaim your money baby. I can understand your feelings lmao, I’m always changing my looks or style bc it feels renewing kinda?! I’m sure you’d look great with perm! <3 I’d love for you to show me too. I’m someone who speaks up if someone infront of me is wronged but weirdly enough..when I’m wronged, I stay quiet? Idk I just let it go when it comes to me. But I’m so glad you have ambitions to portray Justice and stand up for people.

♡….it’s okay if every year you take resolutions or plan something and can’t make it sweetie. It happens. I’ve been trying to be where I am since 2020, but finally at the end of 2022 I achieved my goals. Life has its own pace. I’m sure you can be the boss lady you want. 🫶🏻 and pls don’t feel like you haven’t done enough in life or life is passing away without you having done anything remarkable. Im sure even if your past has been filled w traumas and bad memories and no real progress, in the future great opportunities and memories await you. I believe it, truly. 💗 people are truly truly bad and the world is so warped and cruel I agree, 100% and life isn’t sunshine and roses. But at the end, we just have to see the good in every situation (even tho there’s not always good everywhere) and find joy in the small things no matter how trivial and hard it might seem. Baby steps to get there, remember love? I pray you’re always surrounded by nice people from now on who truly make you believe in the magic that you are. 💙

♡… noo, your thoughts aren’t a mess. I love hearing your mind, it’s fascinating how you have a lot of thoughts about things around you. It’s admirable. It never creeps me out or bothers me, so please rest assured and keep telling me everything you feel like. I’d love to be your human diary! <3

♡…no you aren’t childish!! Using emojis are cute and I feel like they help you understand your emotions better behind the message and words. Or else it’d be easy to misinterpret your words. Like if you say “it’s okay” after someone apologises to you it might seem like they’re still mad at you and upset but if you say “it’s okay☺️💗” the other person might be relieved and believe that you guys are truly on good terms now.

♡..and no I don’t mind you being older !! Omg pls don’t feel uncomfortable and think I’ll ever shut you out. Age is just a number, love. And just bc you’re older doesn’t mean you have to feel pressurised to take care of me or anyone younger than you or be more reserved and act mature. To hell with all those stupid rules and obligations made by society. Who cares? Just be you. I love taking care of people, no matter if they’re older than me. I’ll accept you just the way you are so you don’t have to filter yourself for me. I know it’s easier to open up if you’re keeping some things about you to yourself and being anonymous cause you can’t be judged at all, so you can keep doing that. No pressure hun. Take as much time as you need. I’m not running away and never will.

♡… there was a time I believed in astrology but growing up, I stopped? I don’t know it feels very unreal to me. Do humans really have the ability to deduce the events of the future? Idk I’m quite skeptical. But it’s cool to check horoscopes and be interested in it. The quotes are by ours truly, felix. So here’s one for today. 💛

ꕺ♡ ….💌 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘦𝘯𝘥𝘭𝘦𝘴𝘴 𝖑𝖔𝖛𝖊 𝚏𝚛𝚘𝚖 𝚢𝚘𝚞𝚛 ƒєℓιχ 🌤️ ꕺ♥︎

[☁️….𝗹𝗼𝗮𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗱𝗮𝗶𝗹𝘆 𝗾𝘂𝗼𝘁𝗲] ⇘ ♡♡♡

[tsunderedoctor]

sadly, purple, im back with another emergency request (i wish i didnt come so often im so sorry)

its another day where i can't eat. and ive been so emotionally drained im sleeping more than i usually do, which is only making my appetite worse.

i have a horrible relationship with food and sleep. and it's insanely hard to deal with alone.

i will ask for my usual group (cause im unoriginal 😭😭😭 im gonna wear you out on them one day)

so that's luffy and sanji, but could i mix it up a little? can i also add robin and nami? with a reader dealing with this?

It's okay to request emergency asks, don't feel bad love!! I'm sorry you're going through a difficult time right now, but please remember all the good things you've accomplished too!! And I hope these babes help to remind you, you deserve to eat too!!❤️❤️ Reader is gender neutral!

putting a tw for eating disorder and depression!!

Monkey D. Luffy

Luffy loves to eat! So seeing you struggle with not wanting to eat truly confuses the brunet. He will watch you curiously, finally understanding that you won’t eat because you are sad, which will prompt the young man to bombard you with question on what’s wrong and who does he need to attack?

“Who did it? What did they say?”

If it was no one and you were just experience these emotions due to a lovely chemical imbalance, he will conclude your heart is the enemy and needs to be attacked in love!

Will happily give you all the physical affection you can handle with pouty lips when you first say you aren’t worthy of them. Wrapping his arms around you, he will quickly snicker, reminding you how amazing you are!

Puts his hat on your head as he eats, holding you in his lap with his outstretched arms still wrapped around you. If he even hears a grumble from your stomach, it’s on! Will mention how delicious Sanji’s food is and how hungry he is! Little things to make you finally give in and eat with him. Once you do give in, he will laugh once more, telling you how proud he is of you!

“Hehe~ good job, Y/N!”

Vinsmoke Sanji

He does know what it’s like to not feel good enough for things, especially good food. However, he also has a special relationship with food, and will get a bit sassy with you when you refuse to eat, especially if you tell him you aren’t worthy of food.

“What do you mean you aren’t worthy? What the hell does that mean?”

He means well, he just worries, if you happen to cry or get more depressed from his words, his attitude does a 180 and now he is begging you to eat and for forgiveness.

After some much needed talking, you both come with an agreement to try little bits of food here and there, as long as you try, he is happy!! Will swoon when you try eating more than usual and give you lots of hug and praises!!

“Y/N-swannn~~ you ate all the food I made!!” 

Might have nosebleeds from all the love and pride he has for you when you eat! Don’t take it personal, it just shows how much you mean to him!! He will do his best to cover them and smile happily at you for trying your best for him!

Nico Robin

Robin is probably the best to go to when you are feeling down and don’t want to eat. She is logical, but she also understands that the brain can be mean and emotional. The best for quality time when you just want to vent out your frustrations and don’t need advice, just a hand in your hair or on your back as she listens quietly.

She might try to manipulate you however if it gets to the point where you can’t eat and you are getting physically sick. it’s in good nature, but however, this is when she can’t convince you, so her more darker nature on human interactions come out.

“It breaks my heart when you don’t eat, I’m not sure how I can handle seeing you fade away from me.”

Once you decide to eat again, she will reward you with smiles and praises, complimenting you on how amazing you are and how much you mean to her. She isn’t one for her words, so just hearing those praises can be enough to move mountains. 

If anyone even tries to mention your eating habits or depression, they are given a dirty look from the dark haired woman. If looks could kill they need to run, if it was more accidental however, her look will die down to a smile, asking the person not to say things like that again.

“Please leave Y/N alone, they don’t need to hear such conversations.”

“Cat Burglar” Nami

Nami is similar to Sanji in reacting. She means well, but it aggravates her when it comes to your health and wellbeing. She cares about you and wants you to be safe, she doesn’t want to think of you getting hurt or possibly die from not taking care of yourself.

Will go to Chopper or Robin for advice on how to approach the situation, as her hot-headedness isn’t helping the situation. Will take any advice that is given to her, if it truly becomes to the point your health is on the line, Chopper will also step in and try to coax you.

“I’m sorry, I know I snapped at you, but it’s because I’m worried about you, please eat something, please.”

Once you start to eat more, she will gift you with smiles and small items that reminded her of you. She’s a gift giver, so she wants to show you how much the little things you are doing mean to her! If you need praise or physical affection as well, she will do her best, expect a bit of a blush from the tsundere woman!

“Good job, there I said it, don’t look at me like that! It’s embarrassing!”

Will hold your hand and give you a happy squeeze before and after meals, just to let you know she is here for you! Just don’t look at her or you might end up seeing her blush and frustrated face, she’s doing her best!!

[hyetomi]

Pairings: gn reader x taehyun

Genre: soulmate au, angst, a little bit of fluff

Warnings: mentions of death, major character death

Summary: Kang Taehyun was so in love with you. You were so in love with Kang Taehyun. You were both in a lovely relationship, one that friends and passersby would always be jealous of. No one expected the ending of the relationship that should’ve lasted forever to be this tragic, though. Alas, happy endings only happen in fairy tales. This, however, is reality.

Notes: not proofread !! im so sorry it's really bad because i'm so busy with school i'll edit as i post this tysm for understanding!

Dear Taehyun,

Hey, love. How are you? If you’re reading this, that would mean that I’m either gone or I’m nearly there. I hope you don’t miss me too much. You might be wondering: why didn’t I tell you? Well, it’s because I was afraid. I was afraid of everything happening. It all just… went by too fast. One day I was playing Mario Kart with you on the sofa, then I fainted the next. I was so scared. The doctors told me I had an incurable disease which I had since I was a child. There was no more hope for me, unless I got a heart transplant. Of course, I couldn’t. I had 3 months to live. It was hard as it is to find a heart donor. And even if we found one, my parents couldn’t afford it.

So, I lived the next 92 days to the fullest.

I had 2 goals 一 missions 一 to fulfill within those 3 months. One, it was to complete my bucket list. Two, to make sure you know I love you. So, I went around the city trying my best to tick off my list. Roller skating, rock climbing, go-kart riding… I tried (and succeeded) to persuade you to join me in my adventures. Honestly, I wanted to go bungee jumping as well, but my sickness wouldn’t allow me to do so. We had a lot of fun, didn’t we? I was so happy! It might be because the activities were fun itself, but I believe it was because you were there. There is a reason why the universe chose us as soulmates.

Remember when you first met me? I’d be forever thankful that Huening introduced us. Without him, I’d be too shy to approach you and we wouldn’t have met. When we shook hands while introducing ourselves, the glow in your eyes was so pretty. I would do anything to go back to that time. The feeling of meeting your soulmate… I will never forget it. I’m so glad you’re mine, I would have never thought that the boy I had been crushing on would be my soulmate, the one destined for me. 

I never told you why I love you, have I? Buckle up, Tyun. You’re in for a ride.

I first saw you in English class. You helped that one boy in our class and I was literally the heart eyes emoji. I’ve never seen someone so gentle in teaching. When he didn’t understand your words, you explained it over and over to him, not a hint of annoyance crossing your face. If I were you, I’d give up right there and then. But you didn’t. You taught him again and again and again until he understood. I admire your kindness, truly. Not just that, but you’re so pretty! I know you’re probably tired of me saying this every day, but I’m serious about your prettiness. My first impression of you was: ‘So pretty… your eyes are so big… your nose is literally perfect….’ It’s literally illegal to be this pretty, Tyun.

Not only on the outside, but you’re also pretty on the inside. You’re so kind, brave, thoughtful… you’re basically every good adjective out there except I can’t think of anymore because I’m in so much pain. You’re basically perfect. I’m very lucky, aren’t I? I’d like to think I’m the luckiest person in the world because I’m dating you, Kang Taehyun. I mean, no one else would ditch their most important class of the day just to take care of me because I’m sick. Or walk for 20 minutes during Winter only because I wanted my weekly donut. I didn’t even ask you to do these things for me, you did it from the kindness of your heart. 

I’m really sorry. I’m sorry for being sick. I’m sorry for not being able to spend the rest of our lives together. I’m sorry for hurting you. I’m sorry for leaving you. I’m sorry for everything. I wish that we weren’t soulmates so that you don’t have to bear the pain of losing your soulmate at the age of 19. Maybe, in another life, we could be together again. Maybe then, we could be as free as the wind. In another life, we would be soulmates again. I’m sure of it.

Promise me this: be happy. I don’t want my death to cause you any pain nor stop you from being you. Tyun, you’re one of the biggest positives in my life and I don’t want you to stop being a source of happiness for others. Go live your life, do things you love, be free! But please don’t forget about me. Ha.

I’ll end this letter here. I attached a picture of us in the roller skating rink that I took with the polaroid camera you gave me. There’s still some film left in the camera so you can use it! Take a picture of the stray cat near my house, or of the boys, or my funeral for I care, I just want you to make memories with that polaroid just like I did. Anyways, I love you a lot. I’ll miss you so much, but I will always look after you from above. We’ll meet again when the time is right. I love you!

With lots and lots and lots of love,

Y/N

Taehyun curls up in a ball in your untouched room. It has been 3 months without you. 3 months way too long. He misses you everyday. He misses your smile, your laugh, your eyes, your hugs, your everything. He hasn’t opened the letter because he holds onto it like a lifetime. He fears that when he does read it, you’ll truly be gone. Without his soulmate, it hurts so much. He wipes his tears away, sniffles, and faces the ceiling, holding onto the polaroid you attached with the letter.

“I miss you. You’re looking after me, right? So you can hear me saying this. I miss you a lot. I miss you more everyday.” he voices out, his throat in pain after crying, voice dry.

He looks across the room to see the desk where you two would usually do your homework together, annoying each other and laughing while the night goes on. There sat the polaroid. A pastel blue one, your favourite colour. Next to it lies your photo album. He still remembers every photo, but he decides to open it anyway.

Although his legs ache, he still walks toward the desk. He grabs the album and flips through every page. He holds onto it tightly, like it might slip through his hands and he’ll lose it forever.

He sighs. Taehyun looks toward the polaroid. He puts the album down and grabs the polaroid softly, sniffling once again.

“I’ll make more memories for you, Y/N. Thank you for everything. I love you.” he whispers.

Taehyun grabs the photo album, the letter and the polaroid, trudges towards the door and pulls it open. He took several steps before looking back onto the now unowned room. He smiles, and closes the door. He sniffles again before finally leaving the house. He takes in a deep breath of fresh air and walks home to try and start a new life without his soulmate by his side.