#tried not to take this ask in bad faith bc im autistic and dont understand things a lot of the time. bleh. whatevs

[popstart]

Ok, i Saw that post about you complaining about How Gw*ncan shippers are racist to Courtney.

Can you give one example of that?

I had to go through my blocked accounts list to get this shit and it made me wanna shoot myself 20 times in the head so its not gonna be 1000% comprehensive bc i think that would qualify as self harm. ANYWAYS.

the biggest one is the massive amount of double standards and hypocrisy these people have between duncan and courtney (+ gw*ncan and duncney. censoring makes me feel like a child but i dont want people finding this post when theyre looking for ship content)

when the white man is "hostile but theres more to him than that" and when people call the white boy a "horrible person but hes literally a child" but courtney (and sierra) should be beaten to death because theyre obviously unable to be complex characters or children. its a really classic example of expecting women (ESPECIALLY of color) to grow up faster than men and having higher expectations of them

another example of weird violence and double standards people have towards courtney while not caring about anything either white character has done. post not made by the same person but it is reblogged by them

and ive posted this before because it seriously baffles me but this is just such an extreme reaction to a character existing. also the constant comparison to animals and dehumanization these people push onto courtney doesnt get past me. like calling a character a cunt and comparing her/her fans to tapeworms. get real man

and sure. this could all be a gross exaggeration on my part because theres just no way all of this is meant to be taken 1000% seriously, its just such a weird pattern to see. people constantly praising two white characters for doing nothing wrong and for being perfect and happy and healthy (despite the show frequently showing the contrary) while completely ignoring and shitting on a 16 year old brown girl in entirely absurd ways. These people genuinely believe that gwen and duncan are innocent, with the biggest thing they takeaway is that theyre "flawed but still good and complex."

anyways do i find it accurate to call these people definitive racists/misogynists? not rly no. i just think its extremely telling how much they praise two white characters for being pure and innocent and doing nothing ever wrong when provided with textbook evidence that its not the case.

like you can love any character (or ship) you want but love them WITH their flaws and recognize that nothing is perfect. in 0 way am i saying that liking duncan or gw*ncan is terrible and awful and should be grounds for public execution and im also not saying that courtney is perfect and did nothing wrong and everyone should love her forever. im just asking for a mutual respect that doesnt seem to exist for these people. everything has flaws, but blowing out of proportion the flaws of things (or characters) you dont like gets very very icky and hypocritical when you turn around and praise something that had very similar fall outs

[manstrans]

hi! so i really want to approach you in good faith here, because maybe i'm just confused about what everyone's arguing about? i'm autistic so sometimes i totally miss these nuances. and i think we have a lot in common on this topic bc i'm also a trans man who was forced into femininity for a period (i came out in middle school to... bad reception).

but i really don't understand why you feel attacked by the jokes going around right now? because like, yes, men includes trans men. but when my dad made me wear girls clothes he wasnt going '(as a queer tumblr user who likes having sex with feminine men) you need to wear makeup and 'slay' to have worth'. he was going 'you're a girl so wear girl clothes or else'.

like, i cant help but see the jokes being made as obvious hyperbolic statements, and i dont see any connection between them and the trauma guys like you and i went thru. cause when i was bullied into being feminine, it wasnt because 'men have to do that' it was because 'afab people are women'.

i guess the gulf of meaning between transphobes saying 'youre a girl so do x' and someone on tumblr jokingly saying 'men need to do x or else' is so wide that i'm not seeing the connection? if anything, i think its neat that guys wearing skirts is cool now and not just something that was used to subjugate me.

but clearly you dont feel that way. and i was hoping you could maybe explain why? because im seeing what youre saying and i understand all of it (trans guys SHOULDNT have to dress feminine, and obvs abuse is bad). but i guess i just dont understand what it had to do with the post, which everyone seems to think was only a joke?

basically my point is everything youre saying makes sense, w/r/t mistreatment against trans men, but only i don't understand why the post upset you. and since people are taking sides i'd really like to hear from you instead of just people laughing about it.

ty for asking!! I really do appreciate when people ask for more information on stuff like this

the genre of joke is upsetting to me because the specific wording makes it feel like wether or not a space is progressive doesn't matter, my masculinity will never be seen as something that has to be fought for. even if it's just a joke, it's still really uncomfortable to hear the underlying message of "it would be more groundbreaking if you were feminine" or "you should be feminine for me specifically" when that hits too close to home, even if the person doesn't really mean it it's still uncomfortable to see. appreciation of feminine men is great and I'm all here for it! but putting down masculine men doesn't only target cishet white men and people act like it does when you point that out

the specific post I've been upset about lately though was making fun of a post that I made, the person who made it reblogged a screenshot of my post without the context that I'm trans and then made a post mocking my post immediately after. I did reply to that post explaining the backstory of my post and I tried to be respectful but they've doubled down and, as far as I'm aware, still have not even acknowledged the actual context of the original post they mocked

the genre of post I'm not too upset about, I wouldn't consider it super progressive but it's also not the worst thing in the world. the specific post however is upsetting given the context of it