#tragic misunderstanding

[shallowseeker]

I was thinking about Cas's little sarcastic dig in Family Matters here ("Of course. Your problems always come first.")

Sam, and especially Dean, don’t want to be treated like they’re being babysat by Cas, yet in the early days, they often hope Cas will be endlessly available, invincible, and strong.

(And it's complicated because... compared to them, Cas kinda IS!!!)

Cas, for his part, occupies a complicated space for them. While he is given room to be vulnerable at times, he’s also relied on to be everything at once: Dean's partner in times of trouble, someone who will "be there when Sam calls" and "tear the attic up for Sam," all while shouldering cosmic battles.

The irony is even deeper when Cas gets referred to as "a child" or "a baby in a trench coat"—yet his strength, sacrifice, and loyalty are counted on without question.

(Cas is often goaded into being stronger, of course, because Dean is scared and needs that strength from Cas more than Dean needs it from anyone else, even if Dean doesn't understand why that is. And even if Cas doesn't catch everything in those references, Cas can't help but FEEL that expectation.)

///

BY ANYWAY, BOBBY. In Weekend at Bobby's, Bobby is SOOooooo parent-coded in this episode in a way that kinda parallels Cas in s6.

It's an off-key parallel, but both Bobby and Cas are expected to be there. Bobby without "selfish" complaint, Cas without visible weakness.

Their struggles often go unnoticed unless voiced outright—something Bobby, in true crusty Bobby fashion, has no prob doing in Weekend at Bobby’s:

INT. BOBBY’S HOUSE – NIGHT BOBBY: I – I hear you, son. I – it just ain’t a good time. DEAN (over the phone): Yeah, okay. You know what – Forget it. I mean I'm baring my soul like a freaking girl here and, uh –And you've got stuff to do. So that is – that's fine. That's fine but, seriously, a little selfish. Not all about you. [Bobby gets angry and leans forward.]

///

Dean is going through a LOT, but it's funny how like a child he comes off here. He's spinning out, and he has "no one to talk to," and Bobby's his DAD!

Dean invokes his own emotions like "baring his soul," and is clearly taken aback when Bobby isn't immediately receptive. It shows how Dean expects Bobby to always be there, without question, no matter what Bobby might be dealing with.

That’s classic "invincible parent" territory: the idea that their needs are secondary, or even non-existent.

(Aside// This is sometimes a bit how Sam can treat Dean throughout the run of the series, and how both boys occasionally treat Cas in s6).

///

And then Bobby tears them a new one!!! :D Yay!!! It's a real family moment and I LOVE IT:

DEAN (putting Bobby on speaker after Bobby tells him to go get Sam): You're on speaker, Bobby. BOBBY: Sam. Dean. love you like my own. I do. But sometimes [Bobby pauses and takes a long drink.] Sometimes… You two are the whiniest, most self-absorbed sons of bitches I ever met! I'm selfish? Me? I do everything for you! Everything! You need some lores scrounged up – You need your asses pulled out of the fire –You need someone to bitch to about each other – [Sam looks at Dean, puzzled.] BOBBY (over the phone): You call me and I come through – Every damn time! And what do I get for it?Jack with a side of squat! DEAN: Bobby – BOBBY: Do I sound like I'm done? Now look. I know you've got issues. God knows I know. But I got a news flash for you. You ain't the center of the universe! Now, it may have slipped your mind …that Crowley owns my soul! And the meter is running! And I will be damned if I'm going to sit around –And – and be damned! So how about you two sack up and help me for once? Dean looks very humble and Sam calm. SAM: Bobby, all – all you got to do is ask. DEAN: Anything you need... we're there.

Hits like a tired, overlooked parent.

He reminds them he gets nothing in return from them, which is a HUGE call out to how invisible and thankless his role as caretaker has become.

Bobby’s "sack up and help me for once" is both a plea and a challenge, demanding they grow up and recognize that he, too, is vulnerable and needs support.

It's the parent figure finally voicing the toll of always being strong—for once, asking to be seen.

Dean especially is humbled here. He's been the caretaker for his family, so he gets it immediately.

How hard he was leaning on Bobby.

///

Aside/// This season, Dean's actual support group is small, maybe even consists of just Bobby and Cas. Dean is short on "Dean understanders" this season; that is, he's short on people who see his core experience as not merely a brother, but an actual *pseudo-parent. Dean is a parent of Sam Winchester: and Sam is a complicated, apocalyptic-torn person who's often saddled with shouldering waaaay too much cosmic responsibility...

...which in turn has Dean shouldering too much responsibility too!

So when it comes to Bobby and Cas, Dean puts what he can't take on them! His family!

///

But unlike Bobby, Cas doesn't ask for help.

Which... it's complicated. (And very human.)

For starters, thanks to his upbringing, Cas WANTS to be strong. He thrives and is comfortable being that. Second, there are definitely little ways Cas gets the not-so-coded message that it's bad to be weak, even if those weren't the messages Dean intended to send. (Dean is desperate for everyone to be okay, and he needs someone to want to shoulder the real, complete Dean, with all his duties and complications. And for some reason, subconsciously, Dean wants that someone... to be Cas.)

Regardless, lines like "Babies whine" and "Without your powers" dig a lot deeper than intended for Cas, because Dean didn't have the full scope of the angelic war or Cas's fears about Raphael. And even when Dean DID get glimpses of that, it didn't yield the full story.

///

For his part, Cas is keeping Sam and Dean at arm's length, trying to place them in a "these are my charges to protect" role.

Bu unlike with Bobby, who Dean firmly places in a parental role, something is trying to FUNDAMENTALLY shift between Cas and Dean.

They often find themselves eye-to-eye in the kitchen, making decisions together in a way that feels imho very spousal, creating a dynamic where Dean doesn’t quite know how to navigate this growing sense of wanting to be an equal partner with Cas.

So you get their weird push-pull power struggle between them, sniping and bitching, mirroring what happens in real-life couples early in the relationship when responsibilities are heavy and scary. It's this swirling mix of "Oh shit, I don't know what to do! And YOU don't know what to do! What do WE DO?!" And "You are such a baby / be careful you idiot / be stronger plz for the love of god"

But yeah.

So... Cas holds himself in the role of an ANGEL, remaining largely invisible throughout the season and trying his best to keep his struggles INVISIBLE too, including the war he's fighting on humanity's behalf. Cas prefers that. From a distance. Emotions are scary af; he even calls them CRIPPLING in Mommy Dearest.

(Aside///Call-forward to Mary’s: "I was trying to make things right. Just from a distance, because... being here with you was too hard. Seeing what I'd done to you and to Sam, I..." /// Mary was ashamed of her deal; And Cas was ashamed of his brothers, of angelicity itself, of what they KEEP doing to humanity.)

Anyway, Dean doesn’t quite know how to handle their strange bond, that longing, that closeness, especially as Cas insists on remaining emotionally and physically distant, trying to handle a war they can't even see.

//

As for Bobby and Cas...

While they have their moments of pushback (Bobby’s explosion in Weekend at Bobby’s, Cas’s barbed sarcasm in Family Matters), and it definitely reveals the strain they’re under...

...it often also works to underscore just how invisible their labor has become to the very people they love.

But while Dean begins to grow up enough to see and name Bobby's sacrifices, his understanding of Cas's struggle is murkier, tangled up in pride, love, and the deep, unspoken hope that Cas will always be strong enough for both of them. (Save-me-save-US-but-let-me-help-you.)

I think the thing I love about it all… is the dualistic (subconscious) desire for Cas to make everything okay versus the worry for Cas not to shoulder these burdens alone. It's SOOOOO! HNNNNNnNNnngg. It's very real.

///

EDIT DISCLAIMER: This wasn't exactly the point of this post (Bobby and Cas feeling misunderstood/underappreciated), but for completionist's sake:

Dean's grief is attenuated by the experience of being a "pseudo-parent," and definitely a caretaker in the context of "cosmic-inflicted illness," and that's a riptide that runs through season 6 in a big way. Dean needs the people he loves to SEE this aspect of his life in order to feel understood.

That's what 12x22 is all about. The thread from season 6 to season 12 is surprisingly thick! That's why this:

prefaces this: BEING SEEN

It's not a question of how fair or unfair it is, or if he "should be" or "shouldn't be" "a parent." It's about those very real efforts being seen and understood by those around him, including the grief and continued sense of responsibility this has wrought under worsening and frankly, incredibly unfair cosmic circumstances.

[remixablix]

I imagine that Dazai is empathetic. Not only that, he’s hyper empathetic. That’s how he can be so acutely aware of what others are thinking and feeling and plan accordingly. That’s why he struggles so much with his mental health (when you feel deeply for others then their pain hurts you as well). That’s why he joined the Mafia… as a covert form of emotional self harm.

I also think that his empathy is coupled with deep-rooted differences that make him unable to express it in a usual manner. Maybe he treats Chuuya the way he does because he knows that Chuuya has always felt resigned to being the leader in the Sheep, so annoying and belittling him is Dazai’s solution to that tension. Atsushi always feels incapable of autonomous decision, so Dazai asking Atsushi do ridiculous things would be an empathetic (if not odd) reaction to his self-doubt

[sporesgalaxy]

hi sorry for reposting my own philip wittebane takes again but im having a moment. im having some kind of a moment because of rotating these in my mind. i hope they haunt you like they haunt me ^_^

[raayllum]

thinking about callum being understandably glad and so so grateful that ezran wasn't in katolis when the attack happened, and expressing it, bc he's just happy his little brother is physically alright! but ezran, guilty raging grieving, snaps that's exactly where he should've been as king

[timey-fandom-stuff]

well, guess who lost control of my hands again and was compelled to scribble down designs for ANOTHER Deltarune AU? yeah. me. it doesn't really have a proper name yet so I've just been calling it Changeling AU for now, I'll figure that out later.

these would be the cast's dark world designs; they parallel early Deltarune concepts in which the lightners would turn into monsters in the dark world-- with a few medieval fantasy fae-flavored twists this time around. mortals become a variety of magical beasts in the fae's dark realm, with only 'Kris' strangely unaffected... aside from the hue shift and conspicuously pointed ears, that is.

the main 'Kris' of this AU isn't the only human in town. instead, they're ironically the only one in town who ISN'T human, though not even they know it yet. in reality they're a Changeling, a fae creature that was left as a 'gift' to replace a taken human child. they can do things, strange things. animals come to them in the night, and the cool touch of iron burns their skin. they're afraid of what they see in the mirror; human eyes don't gleam in the dark, and their teeth shouldn't be so sharp. so they hide their features, and they ignore the whispers of the townsfolk, and they keep their head down.

they made a mistake, a terrible one... and they need to set it right.

meanwhile, the human they replaced is still out there somewhere in the fae world, twisted by its curse into a cornered, desperate beast seeking any escape from the realm that has held them prisoner all their life. it's said that when the full moon casts deep shadows over the woods, you can still hear their anguished howls in the dark begging for the name that once was theirs. they can never leave the dark world without it. they'd do anything to get it back.

all they've ever really wanted was to find their way home.

[ssaraexposs]

IS THIS EVEN ALLOWED?!

[stellaluna33]

Thinking about how Rory probably interprets Jess's leaving as him not caring enough, but every time he's left has been a situation where he cared too much.

[sun-marie]

not a hardened!lucanis romance mod....... say it ain't so.....

[limitbreaker23]

Plot twist: the bunny was lan zhan who used this opportunity to be held by jc!

That would explain why jc cannot decide whether he wants to kiss or fight the bunny. He senses the lwj stare it gives him.

Too bad when he takes this one home (because a jie wanted one, obviously), lwj will find himself in a bit of a predicament. shufu, please send money so that lwj can travel back home after he finds himself appearing in naked human form at Lotus Pier.

[bredforloyalty]

honestly um ,. one part of me understands why those posts were made but, are these poser incest enthusiasts in the room with us now

[sweetchcolate]

They're all so stupid.

God I fucking LOVE the Ah-Duo arc. It's criminal she gets so little content and leaves the story so soon. There are so many tragedies surrounding her: her child's death*, how that caused Fengming (someone who admired her greatly) to suffer guilt for years, and how this guilt almost caused the death of a high-ranking concubine and led to the death of an innocent servant as a scapegoat.

As one of the oldest people in the cast at thirty-five, Ah-Duo shows a level of maturity, sympathy, and compassion few others have, extending those feelings to those of lower ranks (who are usually exempt from being shown understanding or kindness). She recognizes the worth and hard work of those around her.

But what I love most about her reaction here are the things left unsaid or implied: the way Ah-Duo speaks of the servant girl's last moments and how awful a death it must have bene (drowned in freezing waters); the way she was both glad but also felt guilty over being promoted to concubine because the emperor cared for her... it all makes you wonder if she was also aware of Fengming's involvement in the baby's death and how she sought to cover it up or how Fengming tried to harm the one girl who saw her (the woman who lost her ability to procreate a sixteen) as a mother figure...

*[spoilers for future plot points]

And how must have she felt, all those years, seeing her son alive and well, but ignorant of his true birth mother, while she mourned the death of the former empress's son? If we go by the implication she was aware Fengming accidentally killed her "child", how must Ah-Duo have felt knowing her most trusted servant felt all this guilt over another woman's child (while never knowing it)?

All that love, all those years of devotion, all undone because of misunderstandings...

It's so stupid.

[evaceratops]

both of the flashback episodes felt weak to me and i can’t figure out why

[llycaons]

wen qing x jiang cheng for the hated ship meme!!

THANK YOU...hehe

this isn't even covering everything wrong w that ship but god it felt good. they're not even especially popular but any jc/wq is too much jc/wq

[fruitgoat]

Hi. I'm an idiot. I've had a plot bunny hopping around the back of my brain for about a decade. I've started to draft it many, many times. But I've never gotten beyond half of a half-assed draft (very few complete sentences) because I've always gotten stuck on a couple key plot points. Intellectually, I knew I could just Handwave away most anything. But that never felt right because they are circumstances that drive big chunks of the plot. I just figured out how to get around the biggest one. It's still a bit of a Handwave but it's an Acceptable and Oddly Rational Handwave. And so obvious that I'm a little unsettled that it's apparently never gotten into my notes for this project before now.

(I'm trying to be Spoiler Free just in case I ever actually finish writing this story. I love spoilers so I often forget until too late that other people can't stand so much as reading the blurb. And I guess you could technically call this story a mystery or a thriller. Not a Who Done It, but more of a Why Done It.)

[sleepfight]

[fandaniel]

everytime i remember fandaniel 'i will kill you and me and everyone' and how he formerly had to hold back a sob over killing a creature that was rampaging i want to rip my skin off.