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harumybeloved · 2 years ago

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why is sanzu like that?

i’ll try my best to explain his behavior and some potential reasons behind his actions

no, he’s not a psychopath

no, i don’t think he has stockholm syndrome

no, it’s not bpd (imo)

i really hope this entire post makes sense (well if it doesn’t lmk)

welcome to my autistic sanzu agenda lol

disclaimer 1: i’m not really used to writing character analysis, i only know how to write random research papers for school so i apologize in advance lol pls forgive me but this post is probably going to sound like i’m rambling a lot + punctuation is my worst enemy

disclaimer 2: this post isn’t me diagnosing him with autism or any other disorder. it was never officially stated that sanzu is autistic. this is purely my own personal speculation + understanding of his character + some observations

disclaimer 3: i was diagnosed with hfa+adhd, keep that in mind; i could be projecting and it’s entirely possible that this whole post is just my exceptionally elaborate hc lol

disclaimer 4: this may not be in chronological order i’m also not the best writer :/ + i’m still editing this sometimes

‣ his “questionable” behavior lol

link to the original translation

strange and/or unconventional behavior is a common symptom of autism as it is strictly correlated with the absence of social awareness because who in their right mind would do that.

Autism spectrum disorder is primarily characterized by impaired social interaction and limited social-emotional reciprocity. This impairment goes well beyond poor social skills and being socially awkward. Children with autism spectrum disorder tend to have a disconnection in their response to others.

(...)

In general, these children are described as very socially and emotionally withdrawn, and “being in their own little world.”

from here

A social norm generally refers to something that society or culture renders “normal.” Everyone is expected to automatically understand and adhere to these unwritten rules, and diverging from the “norm” may be considered “abnormal.”

(...)

An example of a social norm in the United States is that avoiding eye contact is often interpreted as evasive, nervous, odd, or “shifty.” As autistic folks often avoid eye contact, neurotypical people may interpret their behavior as going against the “norm.”

from here

While most people can navigate these changing expectations, some individuals with autism and Asperger’s Syndrome struggle with them constantly. These individuals may have difficulties reading social situations or knowing what type of behavior is expected in certain circumstances.

from here

anyway; it’s also important to note here that people on the spectrum tend to absorb most information not in a figurative way, but rather in simple terms

Autistic people seem to take everything literally.

(...)

Autistic brains, however, don’t automatically group anything together, and instead file everything as a separate piece of information with no apparent similarity to anything else

Well, first it’s important to recognize that it doesn’t come from a lack of understanding of what’s being said to them, but from a difference in processing the information they’re taking in.

from here

let’s say, hypothetically, for the sake of the argument, that haru is on the spectrum. there’s probably a really simple but logical thought process going on in his mind.

mucho (the captain) has certain enemies, he also doesn’t have that much hair on his head lol but his enemies do. so why not beat them up and forcefully take their hair and offer it to mucho as a gift. he’s probably going to think wow what a kind gesture, right???

People with an autism spectrum disorder think in a logically consistent way that leads to quick decision making.

from here

tldr; imo he didn’t know it was a weird thing to do and that he shouldn’t have done that. it was probably beyond his comprehension. that’s why he thinks captains are difficult; there’s a disconnect and lack of awareness.

side note: whatever haru did above here just screams autistic child without the appropriate guidance to me (somebody that’s also on the spectrum)

side note2: this dude literally fights with a fucking katana. he could’ve chosen anything but thought that a katana would be the most suitable weapon of choice to slaughter other teenagers in september of 2008 ....ok..

‣ this very specific interaction with baji in cb3

this was haru’s interaction with baji at some point. keep in mind that they were childhood friends or best friends, they always hung out together. it’s safe to assume that baji knew haru pretty well.

now.. (yes i know) baji saying that haru has always been weird isn't concrete evidence to support my theory.

HOWEVER ,,imo wakui shows us a lot of things intentionally, he could’ve included some other interaction with somebody else but he didn’t. why? maybe because this is supposed to help us understand haru more and give his character more depth.

ok so let’s dissect this. haru asks baji about something really simple/usual, something that's already really fucking random but ok people talk about those things right? haru also decides to ask baji at the weirdest time possible. baji literally just announced that he’s leaving a gang that he formed and haru’s like yes this is the perfect moment to ask him about his haircare routine <3 lol

Individuals on the autism spectrum often have difficulty recognising and understanding social cues and therefore do not instinctively learn to adjust their behavior to suit different social contexts.

from here

u could probably say that oh well baji is just like that, he would say something like that at any given moment. and yes he is (or should i say was lol) chaotic but nevertheless it’s a really random thing to ask at a really random, inappropriate moment and baji kind of pointed that out but again haru wouldn’t know if he was actually somewhere on the spectrum.

as i said before, i do think that how the characters communicate and what kind of words they use in certain situations is supposed to give us some insight into their personalities. with that said, it kind of stuck out to me when baji called him weird and his only response was i see thanks. my personal reasoning here suggests that some people would probably get agitated when called weird but idk.

so now it’s possible that 1. he’s fully aware of what baji called him but doesn’t care and/or is used to being called weird (which again most autistic kids are used to) or 2. such ”insults” rarely evoke a response because he has a hard time recognizing irony (i don’t think the word weird is generally speaking an extraordinarily disrespectful insult when used among friends but maybe that’s just me idk)

Verbal irony can serve many social functions: Speakers can temper the aggression conveyed by criticism, or praise conveyed by a compliment (the Tinge Hypothesis), while bringing humor to a situation. A full understanding of ironic language requires one to make complex inferences about speaker intent, a task that can be challenging for individuals with ASDs who might have difficulties with mentalizing in social contexts or with the interpretation of ambiguous stimuli.

from here

side note: i think it’s so adorable that he actually said “i’m going to miss u”. he didn’t have to, although that’s a completely reasonable thing to say in such situations. this isn’t really related to my theory about him potentially being on the spectrum but it’s such a cute little detail. i think it ties more to the theory that at the end of the day he’s a kindhearted person that’s “gone bad” due to unfortunate circumstances and the environment he grew up in. again, wakui didn’t have to include this line because well they’re gang members, idk if i should expect them to be verbally affectionate but they’re also kids dealing with complex issues so it’s not that surprising to see this if that makes sense. toman haru is so different from bonten sanzu for obvious reasons imo it’s self explanatory

‣ takeomi’s treatment & its possible implications

i will not be judging takeomi’s parenting skills because he wasn’t supposed to end up in that position in the first place but like come on.. he put so much pressure on haru (could be completely unintentionally yk he had his own shit to deal with). i don’t speak japanese and maybe it was originally worded differently but based on this english translation, it’s so obvious that takeomi just really harshly criticized haru for making mistakes (and for not doing the best job at something he’s not responsible for and has no prior experience with)..... why not tell him what to say instead or idk do anything other than just basically saying u are doing it wrong fuck u. there’s just so much wrong with the way takeomi communicates with him idek if i should go any further, this seems self explanatory. he just keeps criticizing him instead of like teaching him or providing some kind of guidance at least idfk

some might say here that maybe it was just this one time that he scolded him for not properly raising his younger sister at the ripe age of 10 years old or sth but imo wakui included this for a reason, to tell a story and show us that it was probably a repeating pattern

and now we’re here. clearly haru doesn’t take takeomi’s criticism well (which was honestly expected from a literal child). he doesn’t understand any of it and why he is blamed for everything.

personally, i think this really fucked with him on a subconscious level (because.. yk ..those topics can be quite incomprehensible for 4th graders that just learned multiplication). hearing all the time that u keep doing things wrong and that it's your responsibility which u should've known somehow from somewhere?

ok this sounds like i’m excessively explaining the tremendously concerning and detrimental effects of child abuse so why am i even including this in a post about asd? well..

Many autistic people are highly sensitive to criticism, even more so than most people in general are. For many of us this may be due, at least in part, to childhood trauma. Many of us were bullied. Even among those of us with relatively non-traumatic childhoods, most of us grew up being criticized and corrected a lot more than most kids are. Many of us live in constant dread of doing something wrong. Many of us have developed a deep emotional need to be "right" at all times.

from here

lol does this sound familiar?

imo what and how takeomi talked to haru made him internalize this idea that whatever he does is wrong and that he should always do better. i included this quote here because (at least from my personal experience) people that are on the spectrum always just have “something wrong with them” and always just should “try harder” to be “normal”. (not my opinion btw, this is just what we constantly hear from allistics).

i guess it’s not that weird to say that well maybe if haru didn’t actually do anything wrong, then he shouldn’t be stressed about getting scolded because again, he’s innocent right? well i’m gonna have to disagree

kids are kids and their brains are still in the early stages of development; let’s assume that an adult (or a parental figure that holds some kind of authority to whom a child looks up) keeps telling said child that they are doing something incorrectly, eventually they will start believing it regardless of the actual circumstances.

autistic people tend to be more sensitive to criticism for obvious reasons as mentioned above so harsh (and unreasonable i’d say) criticism is probably going to affect them to a larger extent

he’s just scared and confused; (also potentially physical) abuse is not a concept that’s particularly difficult to understand

so let’s say, hypothetically speaking, for the sake of the argument lol that haru is somewhere on the spectrum and is already struggling with being somewhat different than most kids. it’s enough for a child to feel inferior and then there’s also takeomi adding even more pressure, basically triggering those very specific emotions.

we can see that this entire situation (and the cause of it) is beyond his comprehension. haru doesn’t understand why but he now knows that somehow it’s always his fault because he always does things wrong. that is a lot to take in for any kid, especially those who are on the spectrum.

my personal take on why he can’t talk back to takeomi: he was already conditioned to think that whatever he does will never be enough or satisfactory which has already affected his self esteem. let’s say, hypothetically speaking, u think that u always do everything wrong and somebody (wrongfully) accuses u of something really random... u probably aren't going to argue with them and will most likely say something like “yeah nothing new honestly” instead. bad example ik but i think that’s where haru was at in this chapter; he already felt worthless and scared in 4th grade, at the age of like 10. that’s so young to feel that way and it breaks my heart ://

Many people with autism experience a triad of trauma: neglect at home, abuse from trusted adults and bullying at school or work.

(...)

Studies suggest that children on the spectrum are up to three times as likely as their neurotypical peers to be targets of bullying and physical or sexual abuse. Such maltreatment can cause severe stress and trauma, yet it often goes unrecognized or unreported.

from here

we can already see that possibly around that time, he’s already begun isolating himself from others or at least developed some kind of subconscious tendency to stay away from them (as a self defense mechanism). i assume his 10 year old brain correlated abuse with just simply existing around others

i think it wouldn’t be surprising if that reasoning stuck with him throughout his entire life as the human brain technically remains in the developmental stage until mid to late 20s.... and below is even proof

anyway moving on; due to the fact that people on the spectrum are much more likely to experience any type of abuse, it’s not that uncommon for exploitation to take place.

up until this point, we’ve established that

haru was already struggling with his self esteem and possibly feeling inferior to some degree in his childhood (which by itself could make him a target of exploitation) but also

the possibility of him being on the spectrum can most definitely increase the chances of him being abused and used by others as described below

Neglect in particular is a problem for children with autism, as well as for those with intellectual disability. Neglect is the most common type of maltreatment documented by child protective services.

(...)

Autistic children are also vulnerable to physical abuse. Primary caregivers in the immediate family are the most common perpetrators of the abuse, but a broader range of offenders — including family members, babysitters and childcare providers — may be more likely to target children with autism or intellectual disability than other children.

from here

TW // disclaimer: the following part mainly illustrates the correlation between sa and autism. based solely on the manga and the direction in which it’s going, i personally wouldn’t say that haru is clearly a victim of sa (although technically it’s still possible) but imo there’s not enough factual evidence to prove this kind of speculation.

i included the following part because it’s extremely relevant to this context and what i’m about to go over next

In addition to difficulty with emotional processing, children with autism may encounter communication challenges that may make them particularly desirable targets of sexual offenders because of the perception that they would be unable to disclose the abuse. Research indicates that up to 50% of children with autism are functionally nonverbal.

from here

ok well u may be wondering why am i even including this if i don’t suspect sa in haru’s case. i think this explanation thoroughly demonstrates how and why autistic kids are more likely to be subjected to exploitation. with that said, kids on the spectrum sometimes may not be aware of what is going on and why it’s harmful to them (that happened to me SO many times but it’s besides the point).

it’s entirely possible that mikey is well aware of haru’s idolatry towards him (stemming from autism or not) and decides to utilize it to his own personal advantage. this panel can literally imply that haru is being used like a disposable tool to do all the dirty work. which again, happens to so many autistic kids as they’re not aware of what exactly is going on.

i wouldn’t even be surprised if haru was happy about the fact that mikey asked him to do all the work, because he would never even consider exploitation. why? because he wouldn’t want to do that to mikey as he cares for him deeply i assume

The ability to discern other's intentions, desires and beliefs is called "theory of mind" and typically develops at about age 4 or 5, according to the study.

In a classic example, a child is shown two dolls, "Sally" and "Anne." The experimenter puts on a skit in which Sally puts a marble in a basket. While Sally isn't looking, Anne moves the marble from the basket to a box. The experimenter asks the child where Sally will look for the marble when she returns.

Knowing that Sally will look in the basket requires understanding that others have beliefs that may differ from our own.

Previous studies have shown that children with autism develop this ability later than other children, if ever, Young said.

from here

keep in mind that haru always ranks lower than mikey; after toman disbands, haru is always directly below mikey. he’s basically his right hand aka does most if not all of the dirty work for him. it’s also highly likely that he puts himself in that position willingly because at the end of the day, he wants to help mikey and do what’s best for him

we were also explicitly shown that he continues to do so in every timeline, including bonten, where he kills people on mikey’s command, for instance

it’s entirely possible that it’s a huge stretch here since he’s the “loyal mad dog” and such behavior can be most definitely expected from haru. nevertheless i think it’s an undeniably interesting detail that gives some insight into mikey’s and haru’s relationship which conveniently bring us to the next part

‣ haru, mikey and baji & the unfolding of their friendship

according to senju in chapter 240, they “were always together back then”. we know that senju may not be the most reliable narrator but

if she “always” followed them around then i guess she had a somewhat clear picture of what their dynamic looked like at that time, right?

basically we don’t really know what happened to their friendship later. we know that it’s possible that mikey was responsible for haru’s scars or was at least somehow involved in the process. it’s also entirely possible that this situation traumatized all 3 of them and caused them to drift away from each other? maybe but this is just my personal theory and i have no evidence to support this claim. so let’s stick to the manga

keep this in mind:

Physical attacks by peers may leave autistic children with wounds on their faces, shoulder displacements and large scratches on their body.

from here

we still don’t know what exactly happened and why (haru’s pov is long overdue atp) but why was it haru that got his entire fucking mouth ripped open by another middle schooler? why not baji for example (since he was also there)? idk seems oddly specific

i tried to compartmentalize all those events and make some kind of a timeline. they were around 10 years old at that time, so chapter 241 probably happened in 2000.

2000 and prior: mikey, baji and haru are best friends

2000: mikey hurts haru

2001/ 5th grade: mikey becomes best friends with draken

2003: toman is formed. mikey, baji and draken are included in the group of the founding members

where the fuck is haru? and what happened to him?

ok so toman was formed and haru stuck around somewhere in the background but was never included in anything major. it looks like him and mikey were still on decent terms i guess? but they didn’t spend that much time together anymore. otherwise it would be shown in the manga i assume. but it wasn’t....

it seems like mikey gave haru those scars and then everybody just moved on? completely ditching him and forming a gang? ://

idk but to me at least, it looks like they kind of abandoned haru because he was somewhat different. this could relate to how baji always considered him to be weird for whatever reason or the humongous scars on his face lol or both.

imo there’s enough evidence for me to think that he was pushed to the back and completely forgotten by his closest friends. mikey and baji found new ones and what about him? we don’t know why yet but it’s just such a common thing that happens to so many autistic kids. brushed aside because they’re different for whatever reason.

It can sometimes be difficult to feel like you ‘fit in’ or to find your place in the world. Because of this, many autistic people can end up being socially isolated and lonely.

from here

Autistic young people are often misunderstood by non-autistic young people, and this can lead to difficulties in their friendships. We know that friendship is very important for our mental health. For non-autistic young people, having good friendships is linked to better mental health and having problems in friendship can cause mental health problems.

from here

Children with ASD have difficulty with social interaction behaviors, including establishing and maintaining relationships, reciprocating social interaction, and communicating with others.

from here

haru baby he’s your childhood friend too, isn’t he? :((

ok so basically to summarize whatever i wrote here up until this point. his friend(s) see him as weird which means that he fails to fit in (does something wrong again). then takeomi nags him about not raising senju properly (so again, he fails to do something correctly). it seems like he always does everything wrong no matter what he does or where he goes.

dude i’d leave home too. haru’s childhood was probably a living hell

‣ haru’s odd placement in panels/official art

draken’s flashback before he died. it’s just so bizarre to me that he’s always there but in the background, pushed aside. it’s possible that draken just wasn’t close friends with haru but if that’s true then why is he even here?

again, in the background. i feel like him being there in the back is supposed to show us that he was always somehow involved but was more of a supporting character. but like... he literally killed mucho in this volume so it’s not like he had no impact on the story’s trajectory.

yes i know that he was on the inside cover but still

there’s mikey, baji, emma and where’s haru? it looks like they were still kids here and apparently they were childhood friends with haru too ... so? could be a reach but like baji isn’t a part of the sano family and he’s there ..

hm maybe haru was constantly excluded (to some extent) from the very beginning, it’s just that senju didn’t mention it or wasn’t fully aware of what was going on

side note: draken and mucho are dead, they also have their backs turned kind of like like pah, peh and haru *sobbing intensifies* anyway

is haru oddly placed here? maybe, idk, not really but everybody’s near somebody they’re close to. takemitchi & hina, emma & draken, peh & pah, mikey & baji, chifuyu & baji, mitsuya & yuzuha, mitsuya & draken and the kawata twins. the only ones that seem out of place are kazutora, hakkai, mucho and haru.

i have no idea wtf kazutora is doing tbh but he’s affiliated with mikey who saved him from his dad the day they met or sth and baji is there so it makes sense + toman was formed to protect kazutora and mikey is its leader.

hakkai is randomly placed too but him and mikey have some history together.

technically mucho was a part of toman, he was the 5th division captain after all and we know that he was close with smiley who was the 4th division captain. so yes, he played a significant role in toman but imo tenjiku arc was supposed to show us that at the end of the day, his loyalty belonged to the s62 generation. well he even told us this

and then there’s haru, completely alone :( idek if he knows the kawata twins or yuzuha. technically wakui could’ve put him next to mucho (that would make a lot of sense) but i think this is supposed to show us that even though they were seemingly close, they were still very much far away from each other (emotionally). although mucho attempted to reduce that distance (cb3) idk if he was able to see any satisfactory results before haru killed him (which imo was a subconscious self defense reaction that mostly stemmed from what i’m explaining in this post)

tldr; imo all of this is supposed to show us that no matter what haru does, at the end of the day he will always remain in the background, pushed aside, forgotten or in the shadows of his other friends possibly because of the way that he is. abandoned and left to deal with everything alone.

‣ haru being a “clean freak”

i’ve seen a lot of people say he has ocd and huge disclaimer here, i’m not saying that all autistic people have raging ocd but like such behaviors tend to be present in people on the spectrum

Autism and obsessive-compulsive disorder frequently accompany each other.

(...)

Studies indicate that up to 84 percent of autistic people have some form of anxiety; as much as 17 percent may specifically have OCD. And an even larger proportion of people with OCD may also have undiagnosed autism, according to one 2017 study.

from here

i mean do i even have to explain this one?

Other symptoms that are present include restrictive, repetitive patterns of behaviors, or narrow and/or atypical interests. They may have inflexible adherence to routines, difficulty with transitioning, ritualized speech or behavior, and exhibit sensory processing difficulties.

from here

Many autistic people experience hypersensitivity (...). Certain sounds, smells, textures and tastes can also be overwhelming.

from here

haru just has sensory issues and is probably unaware of that :/

side note: listen this may sound like a huge stretch (and it probably is) apparently ever since mucho got him cheesecake in an attempt to get closer to him and basically make him more comfortable, he’s been a cheesecake enjoyer lol. now obviously, he likes cheesecake because it reminds him of the unconditional love, acceptance and sympathy that mucho offered him. it probably reminds him of how wholesome that entire situation was because it’s likely that he was never approached by anybody with pure intentions before.

but it’s just so interesting that wakui chose cheesecake, a plain dessert that doesn’t have any weird texture and is probably very much suitable for people on the spectrum. idk if this was intentional, probably not, but still it’s so interesting how everything seems to be adding up lol

on top of that haru literally dislikes spicy food .. come on now ..

‣ hyperfixating on mikey: his primary motivation

....i guess his sensory issues could also explain this panel but it’s kinda obvious that he’s obsessed with mikey for some reason that we don’t know about yet.

again, obv there’s definitely much more to this story that would explain his behavior without mentioning any neurodevelopmental disorders but imo he’s just hyperfixating on mikey.

it’s not bpd/psychopathy/stockholm syndrome; he’s just a neurodivergent kid with issues

It is a kind of extreme fixation on a certain show, person, or thought. It is a kind of coping mechanism for people suffering from anxiety disorders, depression, and autism. Hyperfixation can last for years.

from here

and mikey is probably his “favorite person” (no, this isn’t only reserved for bpd; various symptoms of both disorders overlap actually; they’re different disorders regardless).

i don’t even know where bpd came from, like haru just doesn’t display that many symptoms that are commonly associated with bpd which is primarily characterized by evident (and repeating) behavioral patterns.

Therefore, both individuals with BPD and individuals with autism may have challenges in social relationships but for different reasons. Those with autism may prefer to be alone or cannot read others’ emotions, while those with BPD are more likely to experience extreme emotions and impact their relationships because of it.

from here

i’m just trying to analyze his behavior in accordance with the manga without making additional assumptions and again, the evidence to support such a claim is insufficient.

side note: it’s so ironic that this type of hyperfixation can be “often described as "tunnel vision"

Autistic brains are often really good at focusing deeply on one thing at a time; they may struggle to split attention between topics. ‘Hyperfixation’ is being completely immersed in something to the exclusion of everything else. It's more common in autistic people and can be a great asset. In this state a great deal of learning, productivity and appreciation can take place. When hyperfixating it’s important to take time to look after your basic needs, and it can be difficult when other people or responsibilities seek your attention.

from here

he explicitly states here that he made consistent and persistent efforts just to make sure that the further course of his action was going to be meticulously planned. why? because mikey is concerned with the outcome so obv haru is going to do absolutely everything and anything to succeed

unlike a psychopath, he’s not driven by personal desires; he’s not doing that because he feels like it and/or because it’s fun. he’s doing whatever it takes to satisfy mikey, his “king”

it’s not stockholm syndrome either because

In these instances, the captors use emotional tactics to convince victims to sympathize with them and comply with their demands. This can involve convincing victims that the outside world is more dangerous than staying with their captors or persuading victims that the kidnapper is a victim, too.

from here

and we have not seen that in the manga

This makes victims feel like they are unable to escape from their situation, which is why people with Stockholm Syndrome stay with their captors.

from here

haru never seems scared around mikey; if anything, he’s fascinated by him and excited to see what he’s going to do next.. why? bc he’s simply hyperfixated

my personal take on why he’s so intrigued by mikey’s dark impulses: we’ve established here that haru grew up feeling weak and possibly inferior; he wasn’t as strong as others. so when mikey hurt him in 4th grade (mikey was just another lil kid, they were the same age), that’s probably when haru realized or noticed how strong mikey actually was/still is. maybe he even started looking up to him

from a logical point of view, i don’t think it was weird of him to stay by mikey’s side. it reminds me of why koko stayed in tenjiku. haru’s decision to remain alongside mikey, imo was not only influenced by his feelings towards him, but also possibly the result of making a calculated choice after evaluating the power structure of tokyo at that time. and we’ve seen that haru most definitely has the mental capacity to think logically and use inferential reasoning

‣ you have to keep an eye on the king, but also on yourself

idek how to put this into words this is so sad. not only haru was neglected by everybody around him, but it’s likely that he neglected himself too.

Many people on the Autism spectrum struggle with transitioning from one activity to another. So they just get fixated on one thing so they don’t have to deal with the stress of switching from one thing to another.

from here

he probably became so focused on mikey, his goals and his wellbeing that he completely forgot about himself. again, this could also relate to him being neglected by takeomi, a parental figure and how that’s affected him and his self perception. it’s also possible that he didn’t take care of himself (mentally and emotionally) because he was already conditioned to believe that he’s unworthy so yk why even try

As a result of low self-care, a person could start to feel worthless. Because, in general, individuals on the spectrum might have stronger feelings, even the smallest of things can majorly affect that person, in ways neurotypical people won’t understand.

In addition, many people with autism may feel that even though they don’t take the best care of themselves, there are more important subjects to worry about. Other self-advocates may not have the energy to look after themselves, as a possible result of depression, not enough free time, or difficulties with family and/or friends.

from here

‣ moral judgment impairment

disclaimer: ok this part is going to be so difficult for me to write bc i have no idea what’s right, wrong and what morality generally stands for but i’ll try my best. lmk if this part doesn’t make sense

i wholeheartedly believe that haru thinks (or that he convinced himself) that he’s doing the right and appropriate thing. am i trying to say that he thinks mass murder is justified and necessary? yes i do. because he probably doesn’t see it as immoral or inherently wrong; he only cares about mikey and his “path of carnage”

People with autism may perceive morality differently than normally functioning people because they focus more on the outcomes of situations, rather than the intentions of the people in those situations.

(...)

Moral judgment is a complex social cognitive process, but it is also influenced by moral education.

from here

side note: well who was there to ensure that he receives proper moral education? probably nobody. how was he even supposed to identify a set of beliefs and values regarding what is right and wrong?

Empathy is typically considered as a necessary component of developing moral agents. Empathy may play at least two roles in the development of moral agency: (i) empathic ability might be helpful to learn important moral lessons; (ii) empathic responses to harm suffered by a victim might be important in shaping moral judgments to wrong-doing. Furthermore, empathic capacity is useful in understanding who is judged to be a victim of moral transgression.

from here

very often people on the spectrum lack empathy, which plays a significant role in the process of building a moral compass and developing moral intelligence as mentioned above.

The term ‘empathy’ is used in a variety of ways, and problems of empathy have been suggested to be central to both psychopathy and autism spectrum disorders.

(...)

The affective/information processing correlates of psychopathic tendencies and ASD are quite different. Psychopathic tendencies are associated with difficulties in resonating with other people’s distress, whereas ASD is characterized by difficulties in knowing what other people think.

from here

i’m pretty sure that i’ve already went over this aspect of autism somewhere before but i’ll do it again for the sake of convenience

‘Mind blindness’ — a theory that holds that people with autism are unable to form an awareness of others’ thoughts.

from here

tldr; imo haru is aware of what he’s doing, he knows that he’s murdering people, his friends even. but he’s incapable of understanding why that’s wrong or why he shouldn’t be doing this. his own way of reasoning rejects the idea of morality and what it generally means to allistic people. he thinks in logical terms and the most important aspect of his life is to protect mikey and “his path”. so that’s what he’s going to do and he’ll go to great lengths to achieve that without even questioning if he’s doing the morally right thing. because in his mind, he is. because why wouldn’t he, right?

‣ bonus points for bearing an invisible cross as a consequence of the series of events

not to be annoying but this panel again

disclaimer: i’m probably going to sound like i’m contradicting myself here but pls trust me also i’ll try my best not to project bc this part just hits home lol

yes i’ve dedicated a decent amount of this post (if not the vast majority) explaining how loneliness and feeling abandoned has probably greatly influenced his way of thinking and how he perceives the outside world.

nevertheless, autistic people tend to have a decreased need for social interaction

A general explanation for the impairments in social initiative and reciprocity states that individuals with autism find social interactions less rewarding, because they fail to appreciate their emotional significance. Indeed, abnormal brain functioning in autism suggests impaired sensitivity to social affiliation and reward at a neural level.

from here

does that mean that all autistic people prefer to isolate themselves from others? absolutely not.

ok so wtf am i even talking about here? what i’m trying to say is that maybe that tendency to detach has prevailed the older he got. i mean we saw him have friends before but we also know that at some point in his childhood, he started pushing people away (and not just random people, senju was his sister that he raised so obv they were close). it’s entirely possible that he subconsciously or consciously reshaped his disposition into this over exaggerated but also apathetic persona because of psychological trauma that stemmed from potentially being on the spectrum and how difficult it was to grow up not only neglected but also in a society that’s primarily designed for neurotypicals.

it’s also worth mentioning that it’s extremely rare for allistic people to recognize, understand and react to this. the people around him most likely didn't know what he was going through (he probably didn't even know himself), so they couldn't possibly figure it out on their own. this sounds like absolute nonsense, so i’m going to speak from my personal experience to put this into perspective. my mom is not a neurodivergent person and has no idea what neurodivergent people go through so how could she know that i was always struggling with the simplest things like bright led lamps? she always thought i was complaining for no reason and that i was also trying to piss her off on purpose. why? because she, as a neurotypical, has no issues with bright lightning; if she ever kept bringing it up, it would probably be because of some petty reasons that are completely unrelated to the neurological structure of her brain.

tldr; this brings us back to the story of his neglect and how the perpetuated cycle of abuse never stops, but ultimately and substantially gets worse. obv it’s possible to break the cycle, but it can be a long, draining process that requires a lot of external support and emotional investment.... it’s possible that maybe if he wasn’t neglected by his family, he’d be able to receive the proper and necessary guidance that maybe could have led him to a different path; a path that isn’t centered around violence and straight up carnage.

anyway, keep in mind that this panel is from september 2008, so haru is 18 years old here; technically he’s an adult. he probably spent his entire life neglected and alone. obv he’s developed some kind of subconscious self defense mechanism and now he feels like “i don’t need anybody and i don’t even want anybody” .....because nobody needed and wanted him in the first place

With today’s modern conveniences, a person can physically survive a solitary existence. But that existence is probably not a happy one. Thanks to millions of years of natural selection, being rejected is still painful.

(...)

Social rejection activates many of the same brain regions involved in physical pain.

from here

tldr; do autistic people tend to prefer to be alone? yes. does it still hurt to be abandoned regardless of the presence of neurodevelopmental disorders? also yes. autistic people are people too yk

‣ bonus points for his adorable posture

ok this is really random and more like a fun lil fact about him but like look at his posture, it’s so cute. also i think he’s the only one that stands like that in the manga, so it’s safe to assume that his way of standing is different lol

Motor impairments in individuals with autism spectrum disorder (ASD) have been frequently reported.

from here

‣ extra bonus points for cosplaying Raymond Babbitt

another fun lil fact and i SWEAR i’m not doing this on purpose. i’m most definitely not trying to attribute each and every little detail that i know about him to autism but like..

haru is 2nd best at gambling

Restricted and repetitive patterns of behaviors, interests, or activities are a critical diagnostic criterion for autism spectrum disorder (ASD). Previous studies using gambling paradigms with ASD populations have identified that, unlike typically developed control participants, people with a diagnosis of ASD tend to maintain particular response patterns regardless of the magnitude of potential outcomes to uncertain gains or losses.

(...)

These findings suggest that the ASD tendency towards repetitive behavior may demonstrate itself even in high-level decision-making tasks.

from here

ok i think that’s all, lmk what u think also sorry if this is too long lol

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