#touch-my-wenis
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incorrectfmaquotes · 16 days ago
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Alex Louis Armstrong is a Chad
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do you remember sending this ask? i remember getting it. i was in japan visiting family before i set off to college that fall when i opened my inbox and saw this ask. and i thought it was funny. and true. Alex Louis Armstrong IS a Chad. and i wanted to come up with a funny reply to match. but being quick-witted cant really ever be considered one of my strong suits, and i had even less wield of that skill when still adjusting to a 17 hour time difference. so i told myself not to worry about it, keep spending this time with family members i rarely get to see, and surely when i get home in a few weeks, i could come up with an appropriately fun reply.
that was over 5 years ago. i had gotten back home since then. i had stayed home. virtually everyone was staying home for a good amount of time, a global pandemic happened. other global events happened. Personal Life Stuff happened. i had just graduated high school when i got this ask, and in a universe where maybe some things happened differently, i would have graduated college by now. my keeping of this blog fell more and more to the wayside until life got too busy that it was hard to manage even putting older quotes in the queue and i eventually stopped doing that.
yet a bit more than occasionally over these years, i have thought about this ask and what i could reply to it. still, a fun response has eluded me. but what could i even say as more time passes? that would make the wait worth it? this ask got buried deeper and deeper in my inbox and harder to reach as more asks and submissions were sent. it's entirely possible the blog that has sent it has since deactivated, as many blogs who have sent more recent asks have. the meme became more and more outdated. are chad/virgin jokes still being made? i dont know. even in my teen years i havent been on the rising tide of what slang and memes are currently popular. the gap of knowledge has only widened with age. recently a cousin who is around the same age i was when this ask came to my inbox had quizzed me on tiktok dances and was surprised that i didnt know any, dropping his jaw and exclaiming in all seriousness, "Wow! The generational gap is crazy." the social media i still use the most is tumblr, but more sporadic than it used to be, mainly just a tab i keep open on my desktop to, i dont know, feed some nostalgia? make it seem like im not completely rotting under the weight of adulthood by still keeping some of the rot of my teenage years?
over 5 years have since passed. i am back in japan right now, visiting the same family again, the first time since 2019 when this ask was sent. in the next year, if all things go according to plan, i will be back in college. it's funny, how life goes about in circles. but sometimes, maybe most of the time, those circles dont complete, and many things in life never get closure. or maybe closure does happen, and those circles do complete, but messily, unsatisfactorily, more resembling misshapen imperfect lumps than anything resembling a circle.
all of this to say:
the Chad Alex Louis Armstrong vs. the Virgin Roy Mustang. Discuss.
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sophiagrimes · 1 year ago
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sang animal by neon trees with my crush 🙌🙌🙌 i need him!$!!!!!!!
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ashleyinwondrland · 8 months ago
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I can’t stop thinking about Game Changer and if Sam is leading up to something.
But also Sam saying “bunch of goose eggs” now maybe I’m over thinking this but it made me think of Brennan’s infamous “I can’t win speech” with his big old goose egg. Which I feel like is the only other time someone has used goose egg in reference to a zero on the show.
And it’s like I have a tiny Sam Reich whispering in my ear “this means something..it has to..it’s all connected”
So now I’m thinking about rewatching all of Game Changer so I can find anyone else lay some eggs. And also for any other call backs I may have missed. Like maybe “Sam says everyone touch your wenis” in the Sam says episode.
I will crack your code, Mr. Reich and when I do I will have cracked Game Changer.
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robinismywifee · 2 years ago
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stargazing || e. williams
pairings ellie williams x fem!oc/reader carl grimes x oc x enid rhee (platonic bffs) daughter!oc x father!daryl dixon
summary TWD & TLOU crossover, takes place in alexandria basically if the group never met negan, daryl and aaron find joel and ellie and bring them in, 16 y/o ellie, mention of a not that important death in season 6 of TWD
warnings NSFW, dom!ellie, fingering, pet names (babe), smoking weed, mentions of drinking, ellie & oc are both virgins
a/n im mainly saying oc instead of reader because im using a name for her, (aimees/aime) cause i hate writing y/n but feel free to pretend its your name instead! any feedback & notes are appreciated, you may send requests but they have to be TWD or TLOU charaters x reader otherwise i wont do them, (no promises in general) this is my first tumblr post still trying to figure tumblr, out sorry if i fucked it up or something, i also dont proof read so theres probably a couple mistakes sorry 😭
wordcount 7.5k
carl placed down a red uno card, i smiled at that, placing down my red 5, "uno!" i shouted, holding the card close to my chest so they couldnt peek, my smile was soon dropped as enid placed down a green 2, i stood up placing my card down, revealing my red 4 to them, "i already lost" i mumbled, "rage quiter" carl called me, "im not a rage quitter! im just done playing with cheaters" i crossed my arms
"you so are a rage quitter aimees!" enid exclaimed, "and you so are a cheater!" i exclaimed back, "how are we cheating?" carl asked, "uh, cause you guys just are" i shrugged
"yeah right" carl scoffed jokingly
i watched them as they finished playing their uno game, enid ended up winning, "what time is it?" enid asked as she collected the messy cards around the table and placed them in the box
"uhhh.." i stood up, peeking my head in the kitchen to check the clock, "9:45" i yawned, i had woken up at 5am to go on a run and my eyes were getting heavy, ive been waiting for dad to get back but he hasnt yet.
"i think im gonna head back" i said, one thing about me is that even after being here for almost a year now, i still havent gotten use to sleeping in a real bed, at night in a real house, and i still have yet to call where i was staying, 'my home'
"yeah, me too" enid stood up aswell, "uhm.. enid?" i asked her, she knew what i was about to ask immediately, i hated sleeping alone, anytime my dad was out, i would ask enid to sleepover with me
enid gave me a sad-eyed look, "im sorry amiees, but i told maggie and glenn i'd be home for tonight" i shook my head with a small smile, "no worries, goodnight enid" i waves her off, she gave me a slight nod before she existed the house
i walked into the kicthen, carl was placing the snacks away, "hey" i said, he looked over his shoulder, his white eyepatch covering his old wound, "hey, i thought you weny home, whats up?" he asked, turning to face me
"could you please stay with me tonight? daryl hasnt gotten back yet, and enid needed to get home" i asked, "yea, let me just write my dad a note" he nodded with a smile
-
"hey, aimees" i heard a voice shake me awake, the sudden touch made me shot up and pull out my pocket knife that was under my pillow, but i immediately put it down when i realized it was just carl
"shit, you scared me" i panted, placing my knife back under my pillow, "sorry, i didnt mean to, but its almost 6:30 and im pretty sure your dads home" he said, his eye was tired and his hair was scruffy, meaning he had just woken up, but the topic of my dad made me shot out of bed, only in my socks, pajama plaid pants, and a thickstrap white tanktop without a bra, carl wore a grey hanley shirt and sweatpants
i opened up my door and ran down the steps, my dad was in the kicthen, talking to some other people but i didnt really care about them or have time to see who it was, i just ran up to my dad and hugged him which he of course hug back
"fuck you, you said you'd be back in a day!" i exclaimed as i pulled away, "i know, im sorry aimees, the storm slowed us down" he replied looking down at me, i knew the reason why he took an extra day was because of the rain storm but i couldnt care less, i still worried the worse possible thing
"i dont really care dad, you still said a day" i said with my head tilted, i wasnt actually mad, and he knew that, i was just annoyed that it took longer then normal and missed him
"yeah, i know, i missed you too" he rubbed my back gently, "can we have breakfast together? or are you gonna go back out again" i asked, "uh.." he hummed, i sighed, thinking he had to go back out again, but his gaze was around the room and not on me, i thought maybe he was looking at carl, but im always with either him or enid when he gets back
i turned my head to see what he was looking at, 2 people i've never seen before stood awkwardly a couple feet away from me, there was a man about the same age as my dad, and a girl about my age, the girl wore a white tanktop similar to mine with a white bandage around her right arm, with black skinny jeans, and converse. she had a side bang and her brown hair in a ponytail
"uh-" i stood there for a moment, before looking back to my dad, "are these the people?" i asked, he nodded slightly, i glanced back over to them, and back at my dad, "why are they here?" i asked, over the months, my dad and aaron have been bringing people and even a whole community back, they never once came to our house right, i mean maybe a few says after to stop by and say thanks or whatever, but they had just gotten here and were standing in our kicthen, dirt and sweat stuck to their skin
"ricks still out with michonne so i was tellin them the rules, and you're gonna give ellie some of your clothes" he pointed briefly at the girl, i turned back around, i nodded, i turned my head back to see carl standing there awkwardly too, "im ellie" the girl waved, her face was red, she. must be hot, i went to intruduce myself but the girl bumped her elbow into the man, motioning for him to intruduce himself, "im joel" he said, "hi.. im carl" carl said, standing behind me, "im aime" i smiled, i was actually quite happy dad brought home a girl my age, although carl and enid denied them dating, i still felt like i was always third wheeling
"aimees, why dont you go show them to their house next door, i havent slept in days" i didnt have time to reply as he walked off
"okay.." i mumbled, i looked down to my pajamas hanging over my socks, "uh, could you guys give us a second?" i asked, looking at joel and ellie, joel gave a stern nod, i looked over at carl, grabbing his wrist and led him away with me, i could feel the girls eyes on me as i left.
"i hated meeting new people before the dead started walking, and i hate it even more now" i whispered to carl as we walked up the steps, "yeah, i can tell" he said sarcastically, i shoved him as he hit the wall which made us both laugh
carl changed in my bathroom, as i changed in my room, putting on jeans, a bra, my shoes, and my holster with my gun and knife
"you coming with me to give them a tour right?" i asked carl, looking at him, "nah" he shrugged, i hit his shoulder, "yes you are" i yelled whispered, before we entered the kitchen, joel was in the same spot, while ellie was close up at an old family photo of me, my dad, and my mom
"sorry for the wait, we just woke up" i spoke, causing ellie and joel to look up from my sudden voice, "lets go" i nodded, as they followed me out my house
"uh, so, your guy's house is right next to mine" i said as i began to walk up the steps of the empty house, "hey aimees, im gonna go see if enid and maggie need help with the fence" he said from behind joel and ellie, ellie glanced at carl, but joels eyes stayed locked on ellie, i slowly died inside when he said that, i could tell ellie was looking at me but i still flipped off carl as he walked away with a smirk
"so where you guys from?" i asked, "houston" joel answered, that explains the accent, "boston" ellie answered, i looked at them confused, "oh you guys arent father and daughter? how do you know each other?" i asked, "long story" ellie answered, "okay, well, i mean.. this is your house, uhh, i dont think theres any blankets in your bedrooms and theres not any food, clothes or shower stuff, so you guys can like, i dont know, get situated? while i ran around alexandria and collect you guys a bunch of shit" i shrugged, unsure of what else to say
they both nodded, "ill try not to take to long, ill be back in maybe 30 minutes?" i said, unsure myself of how long it would take, "okay, thank you aime" joel nodded, "oh, uh, i know i introduced myself as aime but actually call me aimees, nobody calls me aime its actually kinda weird.. okay, see you" i said as i speed walked out the house
i walked in my house and let out the biggest sigh.
that was the most awkwardest thing ever.
i walked to my room, and took out about half my clothes for ellie, she only had a small school bookbag, so she probably only had a pair of underwear and some socks in there, if she was gonna live here now, she needed clothes
i folded them up, i was giving her my dark blue tanktop with spaghetti straps that was starting to fade, a grey tanktop with thick straps, a tan hanley that was too tight to fit me, a plaid flannel, light blue jeans, jean shorts, plaid pajama pants, 2 pairs of underwear, a black bra, and a pair of thick white socks. i hope thats good enough
i grabbed a basket and set everything in it, i opened the closet next to my bathroom, placing body washes, shampoos, and conditioners in the basket, along with 2 toothbrushes, 2 things of toothpaste, and a razor and tampons for ellie
i figured i'd drop what i had off right now since they we're probably dying for a shower, plus the basket was over flowing
i knocked on there door, but nobody came, i went to knock again but a voice from inside came- "COMING!" i could tell by the voice that it was ellie, as joels is 10 times deeper and has no emotion
i waited for a moment before the door opened, "hi ellie" i greeted, she stood there looking at me for a moment, she seemed she was deep in thought, "oh! sorry, come in" she said, opening the door wider, i smiled walking in, she shut the door behind me, "i- i dont have everything right i just brought clothes and shower stuff since i figured that was probably the first thing you would want to do, and while your showering i was gonna get the rest" i said, basket in hand
"oh- right- yeah, thank you" she said, taking the basket from me, "i didnt bring any clothes for joel cause i dont know where to get him any and my dad was asleep, but ill work on finding him stuff" i added, she nodded looking up at me, "hes passed out right now, and probably will be for the rest of the day" she shrugged, i laughed at her saying it so serious, she laughed with me, "okay, well, enjoy your shower.. im supposed to tell you to not use up too much hot water, but knock yourself out, i mean, i know on my first day i did" i said before i left her house
-
its been a 3 days since ellie and joel joined alexandria, ellie hasnt really gone outside at all, i havent really seen her since the first day of her being here, only through our windows, our rooms are both upstairs and our windows face eachother, they have blinds but i didnt realize her room was the one across from mine until i was about to sneak out of my window for a smoke the other night
joel been out a lot more then ellie, asking ways to help out, joel was scary, i avoided him, but to be fair, i avoided everyone who wasnt from the orginal group or who wasnt in alexandria when we got there
just like deanna had done for us way back at the start, carol was throwing a welcome party for ellie and joel, i knew carol didnt really care for them joining us, it was just her way of making herself seem like an innocent sweetheart. i admired her tactics, but i definitely was not looking forward to it.
"you guys are going to the party right?" i asked carl and enid, "my dads gonna make me" carl answered, i looked over to enid, she shrugged, "i dont know"
carl smiled, as we both looked at enid for an answer, "still don't know if ill go, i always thought it was stupid and weird when deanna had them and now carols having them?" enid said, "okay well, youll be missing out" i sighed
-
here i was, walking to the house with open doors and music pouring out of it, my dad was by my side, "you know, ellies also 16, you should try to be friends with her" he said, "yea, yea, yea, i know thats the only thing youve been telling me for the past 2 weeks, 'oh youll love her, you guys would be best friends, she annoys the shit out of this guy like how you annoy the shit out of me'" i mocked my dads deep voice, thinking back to how he would come back from spying on them to see if they were safe and tell me about ellie
"she hasnt come out of her shell yet, but i do really think you'd make a great pair" he said as we walked into the house, "im gonna go get a drink and find rick, go find ellie" he pushed me into the crowd, i scoffed, he acts like hes social when i know damn well the only people he'll be talking to is rick and carol.
i searched the crowd for carl, i couldnt find him but i did see ellie with her arms crossed talking with joel, she looked so uncomfortable and so did he, god do i feel bad
i walked through the crowd, making my way to them, while i was making my way to them, some people pulled joel away to get a drink- or whatever adults do
ellie looked clueless
"hey" i said, placing a hand on her shoulder to let her know i was there over the loud music, she jumped and looked at me, "oh, hi" she said, i could hear the nervousness in her voice, "im sorry about all this, you're practically being forced to go somewhere you dont want go to and forced to talk with people you dont know, i told rick and carol you guys werent the party type but they insisted it was the 'polite thing to do'" i explained, putting airquotes for my last words
ellie seemed to soften a bit at my words, "uh- yea, its just super weird going to a party when 5 days ago you were sweating your ass off trying to find a place to stay the night" she said, looking around, "yeah, trust me, i know how you feel, we didnt create this place, me and my group got taken in by aaron and his boyfriend, the leader at the time was named deanna, she threw a party for us too, and when she died, the leader of my group took over to be the leader of alexandria.. rick" i explained
"wheres your boyfriend?" ellie randomly asked, i furred my brows, "what?" i asked, "uh, the one with the long hair and eyepatch" she asked, "carl?" i asked in a high pitch questioning voics, "oh, yeah, carl" she nodded, "carl?" i asked again, she thinks im dating carl? "yeah?" she asked confused, "oh god, me and carl are like siblings, never in infinity years would we ever date! im gonna puke just thinking of that!" i exaggerated, "oh sorry, its just, my first day here, you guys came out of the same room together in your pajamas and stuff"
"oh! yea, he just slept over, i hate being alone" i explained, "me too" she said with a smile, "sorry, but can we please go somwhere else? i cant stand this crowd" i asked, she nodded, i took her hand in mine, dragging her through the crowd until i found carols bedroom, she wouldnt mind us being in here
"what do you like? any hobbies?" i asked, sitting on the edge of carols bed, ellie sat down next to me, "i love comics, joel somehow finds the best ones, and i have a notebook that i write and draw in" she said happily, "oh no shit? i love comics and drawing too!" i said back with a smile
"so have you and joel been with each other for awhile? he seems pretty protective over you" i asked, "just like, 3 years, but i cant imagine my life without him" she smiled, "i cant imagine my life without my dad, or without a lot of the orginal group, like rick, glenn, carl, carol, maggie, michonne, half the people here are my family"
-
i spent the whole night talking with ellie, she was actually really nice and funny, we told eachother a bunch of our crazy/scary stories from over the years, and what it was like for life before it
carl and enid never showed up, i told her a lot about them, more so carl since me and carl have been together since the start, we grew up together and i dont know what i would do if he died
but we had stayed after hours not realizing the party ended, still in carols room, she opened the door with an exhausted look, she didnt notice us, me and ellie side eyed eachother before we bursted out laughing
that seemed to be a reoccurring occurrence between the two of us, we both kept on bursting out laughing at stupid stuff
but at the sight of ellie, carol put on her sweetheart face again, "oh! girls, im sorry i didnt know you were in here" she said, bringing a hand to her chest, "the parties over?" i asked, after calming down from laughter, "yes, it just ended, and joel was looking for you ellie, you better get back home before he starts to worry more" carol said with a smile, "yeah, thanks for the party mrs.." ellie said as we stood up, "just call me carol, oh and you too aimees, daryl was wandering around for you" she smiled with a nod
and with that me and ellie left her house, as soon as we got out of her house i let out a giggle, "its the end of the world and you're still worried about manners?" i thought outloud, thinking back to how she tried to call carol mrs, "hey! you never know, some adults are really strict about that stuff" she defended
"okay, i guess ill see you tomorrow?" i asked, as we made it infront of her house, "yea sound-" ellie was interrupted with joel yelling her name, "ellie! i looked everywhere for you! where were you? i havent seen you since the party started-"
i just smiled at joels protectiveness and slipped myself away and went back to my house
"hey dad" i smiled, seeing him on the couch, "oh good, i was waiting for you to come back so i could sleep" he said getting up, "you seem happy?" he questioned, i hated parties, so this was weird that i was smiling a bunch after one, "yeah! i hung out with ellie the whole time, shes really funny! i really like her" i said with a hudge grin, "told you, you'd like her" he nodded, not supprised
"so was it just the two of you or was carl and enid there? i didnt see them tonight" he asked, now leaning against the kitchen counter, "just us, i have no idea where carl and enid are, which kind of sucks since i wanted ellie to meet them, but also its good because i really enjoyed hanging out with her alone" i said, my voice bright from talking with ellie for hours
"im glad you had fun" he nodded with a smile, "oh! do you wanna know what! now when i hangout with carl and enid, ellie will be there, so i dont have to third wheel, i mean they were always being so gross infront of me like complimenting each other and stuff, like ew, and now me and ellie can be grossed out together!" i said happily, my dad laughed, "im glad we found ellie and joel too, can you please tell me more in the morning over breakfast? im ready for bed"
"yea, of course, goodnight dad, i love you" i said, giving him a quick hug, "love you sweetheart, get to bed too, its way past when you should be asleep" he said, kissing me on my head, "yea.. yea, whatever" i mumbled sarcasticly as he walked to his bedroom
i turned off the lights and went to my bedroom, i unbuttoned my jeans and went to pull them off when i felt something in my pocket, i sighed, forgetting i had it, as i pulled out the bag of joints
this would have been perfect for me and ellie, would of been 10x funner.
but, i wasnt tired, and now that i was holding up the rolled up cannabis, i really, really wanted it.
i thought about carl and enid, enids never been high before, but me and carl have a few times, and i don't even know where they are. maybe i can have just one joint to myself..
another thing i do on nights when im not tired, is go to my roof and look at the stars, usually while i smoke cigarettes but weeds even better.
i looked out my window to see that the sky was clear, i smiled to myself, i walked over and turned off my lamp, okay, only one. i placed the other two joints in the bag in between my folded shirt in my dresser, letting the one joint hang in between my lips
i opened up my window, cringing at the squeeked noise, i stuck my legs out, letting myself fall onto the roof, i climbed to the back of my house still on the roof so i was facing the big fence and not out in the open, the only way people would be able to see me is if someone specifically looked in my direction through ellies window
i pulled out my lighter and lit the weed, sucking the toxins into my lungs before blowing out
i sat there for a couple minutes looking at the stars above me, they always fasanated me, i looked to the moon, it was a full moon tonight, of maybe it was a just a full waning or waxing gibbous, i dont know to be honest
the sound of a window opening drawed my attention, i shot my head to the sound, joint in between my lips, to see ellie climbing out of her window
i watched as she hopped onto her roof, shutting her window, and hopped from her roof to mine, as our houses were really close together, she let out a pant, from being out of breath
"hey" she said as she stood there above me, she had already changed into pajamas, wearing plaid baggy ones that were too long for her, ones that were previously mine, and she wore the grey thick strapped tanktop i had also given her
her hair was down, something ive never seen of ellie, some of her auburn hair was over shoulders while some was on her back, they reached a couple inches unde her shoulders and her eyes glistened in the moonlight
"uh, aimees? you barley smoked any of that, you good?" she asked with a smile on her face, "oh, yea, im-" i started saying, realizing i just stared at her, but i spoke really loud as i talked not realizing how loud i was being, "shh! come on, i dont want joel or your dad to wake up" she whisper shouted
"right, sorry" i whispered back, she came over to me and sat down, "can i?" she asked, reaching her hand out, i passed her the joint, and watched her as she looked up to the sky, while taking a long drag of it, she closed her eyes as she sucked it, enjoying the feeling
my eyes were beading onto her, watching every detail on her face, the way her eyebrows slightly scrunched as she sucked in, or how she squeezed her eyes, how her soft pink lips fitted against the rolling paper. i was so close to her our shoulders were brushing against each other, and i noticed things about her that i havent noticed before, she had beautiful green eyes, ive noticed her eyes being not brown before, but now i could actually see what color they were, and her freckles complimented her face so well, they danced all around her cheeks and the tip of her button nose. i even got to exaime her brown eyebrows, i could see the slit she had through it, her eyebrows were also pretty straight, but they looked so perfect on her. her side profile was honestly the best ive ever seen in my whole life. the way her lips moved out, how her adorable nose arched perfectly and how- wait are her lips moving?
"aimees?" she asked, okay yeah they were, "sorry, what?" i asked, looking into her eyes, "you zoned out on me again" she commented, "sorry its just, you look really pretty" i said, still mesmerizing her in a trance, she turned to me, i could see her cheeks turning a shade of pink, before she looked back infront of us
thats kind of weird, i mean, i was just saying she looked pretty, i say that to enid all the time and she just compliments me back or says thanks, but ellie got flustered for some reason and tried to hide her face with no comments
we passed the weed arond in silence for a moment, "you do this a lot?" she asked, "usually just with cigarettes, but i got lucky and found this on a run a few weeks ago.. i love the stars"
"i love the moon" she remarked, i looked to her with a smile on my face, "if i could anywhere i'd go there" she said, looking at the moon above her, "can i come with?" i asked, she turned to me, our faces inches apart, "yeah but.. be aware, joels coming too, and hes a big grump sometimes" she answered, i laughed at that, giggling as i rested my forehead on her shoulder to contain myself, i hear giggles come from her too
"okay, shh, shh we have to be quiet" i whispered, leaning back up to face her, "youre telling me to be quiet? youre the one who started laughing!" she said with a smile as the joint hung between her fingers, "urhg, give me that" i said, taking the joint from her and puffing a few
"its not my fault, you make me laugh more then like, anyone ive ever met" i said after a couple seconds in silence, "really?" she asked looking back to me, "mhm" i nodded, letting out another giggle at nothing, which caused ellie to giggle with me too, we fell onto eachother laughing up a storm, "oh! oh my god! i cant breath!" ellie said inbetween laughs, "stop!" i cried, gripping her thigh for support, trying to catch my breath
we kept on laughing like that for probably too long, after a few minutes, i ended up even closer then before, our laughter dying down but smiles still held on our faces
"whats your last name?" i asked her out of the blue, which caused us to laugh a little some more, "williams?" she sid in a questioning tone, "w-why did you say it like that? are you sure thats your last name or did you make it up because-"
"no! no! thats real, my last name is williams, i was just- cause you asked so randomly!" she explained, "okay, well, ellie williams, you-" i said, pointing at her and using a tone for the word you, "-are my new favorite person"
"and you- aime-" she stopped for a moment, "whats your last name?" she whispered, "dixon" i whispered back, "you! aime dixon, are my new favorite person" she said, usuing a tone and pointing at me for you like i did, but usuing a tone and pointing at herself for me
this caused us both to laugh again, i guess weed made us a bit giggly, we seemed to be eliciting laughter not matter what
"you know what we should do?" i asked, "hmm?" she hummed, i took a puff a weed, noticing it was almost all gone, "we should get married"
i noticed her cheeks start to turn red, "i mean, how could i not want to marry you! look how cute you are with your blushing" i said with a hudge smile, "i accept, mrs williams" ellie said to me with blush still wearing her face, "aime williams! hm, i like the sound of that!" i laughed
"hey, i have idea" i said, looking down at the blunt, "yea wife?" she asked, "my dear husband, we could finish this joint in one puff, shall i shotgun it to you?" i asked with a smirk, "first of all, wife, im your wife, secondly, i dont know what that is" she deadpanned, i let out a couple giggles from her
"okay, well if im the wife, how can you be the wife? anyways, why dont i just show you what a shotgun is?" i offered, still smirking, "hmm, okay fine" she said with a smile, unsure with what was to come
i smirked devilishly, i blew the rest of the joint into my mouth, before flicking it off the house, i brought my hands to ellies face, moving her face to mine, my eyes were closed but i could tell she was blushing
ellies mouth was slightly ajar in shock, so i blew the smoke into her mouth, the feeling of her warm, soft, silk lips, her nose tickling with mine and the way my stomach was attacking itself with a swarm of butterflies from us touching like this
the weed did something to me, because i couldnt help myself, and without any thoughts, only the feeling of want, i pressed my lips more firm to hers, and moved them onto hers, my lips were dancing on hers and she didnt move.
i lifted my lips up for a split second, releasing the smoke from our mouths, i pulled away, realizing what i had just done, my eyes started to feel with tears looking down at her, my hands still holding her face, only inches away. i was so goddamn embarrassed and mad at myself. why the fuck would i do that? i dont even like girls, im not gay, and i definitely dont like a girl i just met 4 days ago. it had to be the weed because im not a lesbian, and judged by the complete silence between us, and ellies face, she isnt eithe-
my angered thoughts were interrupted as ellie leaned into me, tilted her head as she pressed her blushed face to mine, now our lips danced together, i could smell her breath, it smelt of mint toothpaste and marijuana, but i wanted more of it, i wanted to taste it
as ellies hands gripped my shoulders, and mine gripped her face, i brushed my tongue against her lips, getting a slight taste of her, she didnt open her mouth, so i took my left hand from her cheek and placed it on her waist, rubbing her skin and plulling her closer to me, the sudden contact made her mouth open slightly, and i took that as an opportunity to slip my tongue into hers
not only was the smell of marijuana filling my nose, but the smell of the shampoo i gave her was lingering, i think the scent was lavander, either way, it smelt good, delicious, and i wanted even more
i honestly was starting to feel lightheaded and dizzy, so i pulled away for a moment, i sucked in the air to catch my breath, but my mouth was covered again by ellies lips
this time, her tongue filled my mouth, our tongues danced, as i started to fall backwards from her leaning on me, i felt so carried away and a feeling i never felt before filled my body
i pulled away from her, standing up and dragging her up with me, we had our foreheads pressed together, panting, "come on" i whispered, as i looked into her red eyes, i pulled away from our embrace, taking her hand in mind, pulling her to the side of my window, i climbed in first, helping her climb in too
once she got in, i shut the window and shut the blinds, our light pants cramming the room, i turned around to for a pair of hands pressing against my waist and shoving me against the wall, i was met once again with her lips
i couldn't help, from the sudden action, and melting deep into the kiss, and the feeling of her hands rubbing on me, i let out a small moan into her mouth, i hadnt realized it until it already left
my cheeks went red from embarrassment, hoping she didnt hear, but she pulled away, i couldnt bare to look her in her eyes, i stared at the ground, looking down at our socked feet on the carpet
ellies right hand moved off of my waist, i thought she was about to freak out and leave or something, but she placed a hand on my chin, and lifted it so my face was forced to meet hers, i expected her face to be filled with disgust, but she had a smirk on her face, her freckled cheeks bright red
"dont be shy, you have a pretty voice" she whispered, butterflies formed my heat. not my stomach, but below.
i looked at her dumbfounded, i never felt this way before. i didnt know what was going to happen after all this, what me and ellies relationship would be by tomorrow, i didnt know if i was gay- but i did know that i wanted more of her touch, i wanted to feel her touch, not only on me, but in me.
i pulled pulled the back of her neck onto my face to be met with mine, our kiss even more passionate then before, my knees felt so weak, like i could collapse at any moment, so my hands were balled into a fist gripping her tankop. her hands were squeezing my skin, i couldnt help it, i wanted to feel more of her skin
i lifted my left hand from her tanktop, and lowered them to the hem of it, before i stuck my hand underneath, trailing my hand against her skin, i stopped once my hand got to her bra, unsure of how far she wanted this to go, but her hand lifted from my waist and pulled my wrist up and underneath her bra, allowing me to feel her shape and soft skin
instead of ellies hand resting back on my waist, she snaked it under my jeans, and i felt her squeeze my ass, i had to pull away from our kiss as i let out a grunt, it would have probably came out a moan if i didnt keep my mouth squeezed shut and tried to hold it
we made out rubbing eachother for a few moments before ellies hand slid out of my jeans, i was disappointed until i felt her hands yank at the waist of my jeans, they were still unbuttoned so all she did was slid them off of me, i broke our kiss to step out of them
ellies hands went straight to the back of my bare theighs, "jump" she grunted, her voice deep and raspy, i did what she said, i jumped so my legs were wrapped around her waist as she still held me up by my theighs
as we shared a sloppy yet passionate kiss, i felt my back lift from the wall, ellie brough us across the room, and i felt myself get dropped into my bed
i could see ellie from the moon that lit our room, she crawled ontop of me, hovering over me as our hands and lips connected once again to eachother
she trailed her kiss to my jawline, i felt like i was to explode, i tilted my head so she could get more of my neck
i shouldnt be doing this, but i want to, but dads downstairs, hes asleep, but im high, we both are
my own thoughts fought eachother, i tried to bring myself to stop it, but i couldnt.
my fingertips rested on the fabric of ellies tanktop, i pulled her away for a moment, pulling off the grey top over her head, my eyes went straight to her body, and god did i feel faint.
she had a grey calvin klein sports bra on, my mouth was starting to water.
ellies hands went to my tanktop, i lifted my arms so that she could pull them over my head, i was nervous, especially since i didnt have a bra on, but i wanted it too much to stop
ellie and i stared at eachothers bodies for a moment, she leaned back in and connected her lips straight to my sweetspot of my neck, at the same time her hand went and messaged my boob, ellie was doing things to me because i couldn't even hold in my moans anymore
ellie left a trail of bruises down my neck as she went down more, and connected her lips to my nipple, my hand went to the back of her hair, squeezing her roots, right when i did so i could faintly hear ellie moan into my skin- she likes hair pulling, noted
ellie kissed my one breast and messaged my other, as i squirmed under her holding her hair
"ellie.." i whisper-moaned. "yea, babe?" she mumbled through her kisses, i felt hotter from her nickname, "please.." i whispered, i couldnt handle it anymore
ellie brought her hand and rested it between my legs, but it was inches away from my core, i squeezed my thighs together to try to make some sort of friction, but ellie moved her hands and pressed my knees away from eachother, "please what?" she asked in a dominant voicd, she obviously knew what i wanted, but wanted to hear me say it
"please-" i tried to get a full sentance out in one go, but that was near impossible, my fingertips rested on ellies pants, streching the fabric wanting them off, i was completely topless and had my pants off, yet ellie had a bra on and pants
ellie got off of me for a moment, taking her pants off, which i silently thanked her in my head for, "please what?" she asked again, her voice more raspy then before, "touch me" i moaned, she smirked, leaning in and kissing me again, i missed her lips and the taste of them
she rubbed her hand up slowly, her finger brushing against my cunt. without even thinking, my hand shot to ellies hand that was in between my theighs, and pushed it more towards it
as ellie grunted, she moved my underwear to the side, letting her fingers drag along my slit, "this wet for me baby?" she panted, "all for you" i replied, instantly connecting our lips after
ellie teased me, tracing her fingers up and down my wetness, i sunk my hips down more, trying to get more, ellie broke our kiss with a small laugh, she gave my lips another sweet kiss before she pulled away from my face, i looked up at her confused but my confused face was shortly changed to arousal, as she slipped her middle finger partly inside me
she slowly pumped her finger more into me, causing my head to go back on my pillow, ive touch myself before, but nobody had ever touched me, this was a complete new experience for me
as she pumped them in and out, i felt her start to grind her hips onto my theigh, all the fricton, i started to let out more and more moans, my mouth was closed so they werent as loud
i felt her add her ring finger in me, and curling them around my walls, her hips grinding with more pressure,i let my jaw fall, and furred my eyebrows as i moaned, ellies hand went straight to my mouth, covering any noises that escaped.. i realized for a split second that- oh that was really loud and could of easily woke up my dad- but the feeling of her fingers twirling around in me made me instantly forget about it
i couldnt help but start to grind onto her fingers, rocking my hips up and down. ellies hand slowly moved off of my mouth to grip on my hip, letting out a moans with me, her voice was so hot it made me even wetter. she then moved her hand down even more, i thought it couldnt get any better but she started to rub my clit
"mmfpph.. ell- ellie- i-" i screched, i felt my stomach tie into a tight knot, my body froze as i squeezed my eyes, while my hips stopped moving, ellies hands only sped up, and her hips started to move faster, practically jumping up and down on me, "ellie" i whinned, my eyes rolling back as i felt myself release, ellie grinded on me until her hips froze, "hh- hfphmhmm"ellie moaned, also coming to a finish, i watched her as she leaned her head back, mouth ajar, eyebrow's squishing together.
the room was filled with heavy pants- our chests going up and down as if we just had a near death experience
we stared at eachother trying to catch our breaths, ellies hair was clouding all around her face, her hair falling to her shoulders, really messy compared to how it was an hour ago, in which it was neatly brushed
ellie looked so beautiful, but there were two things i realized as i stared at her
1. we are still high as shit
2. ellie williams, a girl i met a few days ago, just fucked me
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crguang · 3 months ago
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kjs loving anon here!!
you are very correct aboit wasted potential. i read her wiki page so many times that its ingrained to my head. her character stories are so sad, she yearns for more interaction so badly. touch-starved isnt enough for her. there is this voiceline from her on when it snows and she basically goes on she wpuld like to catch snowlake but doesnt since the snowflake would melt and i think its more deeper since its canon that kjs doesnt let herself enjoy pleaseantries due to her her ugly ass dad. 😐😐😐
she feels very isolated and lonely qnd doesnt let herselt accept it since she feels like ots being ungrateful ☹️☹️☹️ shinobu is the closest thing tk her as a friend and her ass treasures thst sm 😭😭😭 and she even wantd to be closer to ayaka but fears cuz of her reputation as a cold hearted general it womt work and itd sad that ayak does view her as a stern general.
she wants to play a game of go with ayak wince shes skilled im go and she says the kamisato house was always mich livlier compared to kujou house, there was music, dance ☹️☹️
im her childhood, her ugly dad punished her for playing off with the soliders and the sloiders got punished so i thi k thats why she distances herself. she feels like if she gets closer the other will get hurt
an actual vpicelime from her
"I might be a little stone-faced sometimes, but even I get lonely... especially when I catch sight of one of my subordinates sharing an intimate moment with their family. "
i hate when ppl depict her as a cold hearted person, shes just really emotion repressed and touch starved. shes also a huge sweetheart.
in character story 5
bake danuki were causing a nusianfe to tje civilaind and stealing food, she gave them a stern earning and would bring food for thrm whrn sbe weny to train at the forest so they wouldmt steal again but also be fed ☹️☹️☹️
i think i yapprd way too much but yeahh i lpve her and wish she got more love!!! shes more than a "raiden simp", i wish i could yap on my thoughts regarding her dveotion but ill shut up for noe 😭😭😭🙏
omg i didnt know any of that and its really a shame because she sounds so cute😭 i didnt know she was this lonely and distant because of her family, i always thought she was an interesting character but never went on the wiki to read about her or anything. i also didnt know her and shinobu were that close (in her mind), i just thought they did each other favors sometimes. that was really nice to learn though so thank u for that, also read your other ask and dont worry about yapping i dont find it rude at all, it’s nice that you’re this passionate about a character. my whole account is literally about gacha characters so hfjfjgk and i also like unrequited love that’s why i see the potential in eisara, i like to see that relationship develop from sara’s point of view more than ei’s
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blabbering-and-such · 8 months ago
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Pls no one see this I'm void screaming rn
I know one furry and everytime I talk to them I want to sink into the earth and never come back up. Probably not a refection of all furries but omg they keep wiggling their fingers at me and saying their gonna touch my wenis (we are barely acquaintances). I DONT WANT IT TO COME OFF LIKE IM MAKING FUN OF THEM BUT I JUST CANT BRO IM SO FR.
Also I think their friends are afraid of me???? Whenever I'm near them they avoid me like I bite. One of them is actually very chill and I do want to be friends with him but I don't want the furry person to think that we're gonna be close and they can go around grabbing my wenis all the live long day. NOT CALLING THEM FURRY PERSON AS AN INSULT ITS JUST DESCRIBING THEM I SWEAR I SWEAR 🙏🙏
erm anyway it's 4:00 am so in just gonna post this without thinking about if it could effect me in any way and regret all my wording in the morning
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sarcoptid · 1 year ago
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I say "Rorschach"
you say "penis"
touch my
arm and
feel my
wenis
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givemespacedog · 2 years ago
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my wenis (woman penis) touching ur wenis (woman penis)
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celestiachan · 2 years ago
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HelIo! I have been blessed many times, now I try to touch your hearts to help protect my little angel grace diagnosed with sickle cell disease. but the worst were the THREE strokes to the brain.
Thank you once again for getting here and for everything you can do for Grace's well-being. Donate anything please if you're able🙏
wenis
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jeanmoreausautismstickers · 5 months ago
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annoying the fuck out of my partner is my passion
like baby, if I could touch your wenis...
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meerealsssss · 7 months ago
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"stop touching my wenis"
-mr shart
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granddaddy-purplee · 7 months ago
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auctioning off killion for weed
this isnt u
azail dance
hypnotising
dont wanna waste tyler cart
store credit.
touched by close family member
first u touch my wenis, then tryston laughing during trauma time
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animatedtext · 5 years ago
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requested by touch-my-wenis
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jacularmetteld · 7 years ago
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***
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lowkeyclueless5137 · 3 years ago
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Some ansty angst today
Yesterday, @spirtworld wanted for me to unleash some raw Floyd angst into the wild and see how everything will go down... So here we go :3
This is one of my favorite headcannon-theories that will play as a base in here, even if I believe it was debunked to not be real... But... Lemme have it... Because yes... It was inspired by some pretty fanart on pinterest, but I lost the links ;-;
I wrote this on discord... Explaining it in depth and how dark it could get...
But we aren't getting into the dark part for now :3
We will have a tiny weny oneshot of how everything played out after I explain everything.
Also... This might be hints about my pttw comic... So if you wanna figure it out... Go ahead and read it...
But if you don't want some slight spoiler hints... I recommend you shouldn't read it...
That was a warning!
Under the cut I'll explain it. (copy pasted from my notes and edited accordingly)
Anyway!
I headcannon heavily that Floyd is actually really aware of his public image. Like he is aware people fear him, he is aware other students would rather dig their own graves than hang out with him... He has that scary aura around him.
And that is a thing Floyd hates, because this is exactly a trait of the Diasomnia students... He tries his best to be playful and snuggle himself into social circles, but he does not really succeed so easy, which makes his moods to alter more, yet Floyd sees how Jade and Azul manage so well to blend in, making him a bit envious.
Because they were since start in Octavinelle (here's where the theory comes :3)
My theory is this: Floyd was sorted at first in Diasomnia (I say it because he really fits the vibe of scary, but actually a quirky guy)
But imagine how the world would crash onto him once he hears that. That Azul, his dear friend that even changed and grew before Floyd's own eyes and Jade, his own twin, his half, his family, the 2 most precious of persons Floyd ever had in his life... To be separated from him in a different dorm. That's how he made that commotion at the sorting ceremony, getting on Riddle's nerves and having his first taste of the 'off with your head'.
He started to feel conscious of his appearance, of his public image since that day. He didn't want to talk with silver(his roimmate) at all. He didn't want to get out of bed, he didn't want to eat, he didn't even want to touch his magic pen. He would even resort to running away and breaking into Octavinelle just to be with Jade and Azul.
Just to try and feel like he belongs somewhere, where he is actually loved for who he is.
Azul wasn't ignoring any of this. He was really concerned. And while Jade was aiding to his brother's pitiful state, Azul was trying his best, skimming through everything and putting all of his efforts into finding something that would priquire Malleus's interest enough, so he could trade it for his approval of moving Floyd into Octavinelle.
Azul tricked his way and made his reputation of being 'shady' just to become Dormhead and have the authority necessary to get Crowley and convince Malleus to let Floyd transfer to Octavinelle.
All, of course in the best of discrecy.
Of course this incident was hidden and most of the students remember only that Floyd caused a stirr at the ceremony just because he angered Riddle. No one actually paid mind to which dorm Floyd was sorted.
But Floyd couldn't shake that feeling that he doesn't belomg in there... He hates that he feels like he doesn't fit.
He hates himself for not making enough efforts to fit.
And sometimes, when emotions drive him off, his magic pen will turn a bright green instead of the usual white gem, typical Octavinelle, which would scare him, thinking that he'll have to go back in Diasomnia.
Jade forgot about the incident and decided that it was better if it wasn't brought anymore. Azul was keeping the contract(which wasn't out of his um) with Malleus and Crowley about the transfer, buried deep in the safe of his office.
Now imagine chapter 3... But Leona and Ruggie get their hands into that transfer contract too. And by destroying it, they force Floyd to go back to Diasomnia unknowingly.
Now let's see the little oneshot:
~~~~~~
Blot
Chaos
A mess everywhere you would look. That's how one would describe the scene left behind Azul's overBlot. One would expect that the Dormhead of Octavinelle wouldn't spiral in such a ravenous crying fit for just a contracts. And even after he was brought back to normal, Azul scrambled, under everyone's judging glares, to the pile of golden sand, grabbing it and digging through it.
He was desperate. There must be in there! There must be at least a little intact piece he could use magic to restore it. No? It has to be!
"Azul! Azul! Snap out of it! Look at me..." Jade was the first one who grabbed his friend by the shoulders, shaking him to gain his attention. Floyd was right next to Azul, getting a more firmer grip onto him than his twin, to have Azul in a somewhat reassurance, which didn't work.
"I-it's gone... It's destroyed... We lost it... We can't retrieve it... It's gone!" Azul started to mumble as his inky tears were rolling over his cheeks, the boy leaning onto Floyd as he was crying silently, mumbling in between heavy breaths about 'the lost object'.
Jade looked at the pile of sand, then at Floyd. At the poor clueless Floyd. Eyes landed onto his twin's breast pocket before teeth grittered with anger.
Getting up in a flash, Jade grabbed Leona by the neck. "Do you even realise what you've done?! ANSWER ME!" the boy screamed, which was a shock for everyone. Jade usually was the more collected one, yet right now, the eel was seconds away from just leaving Leona headless for real.
"Jade! Stop it! What has even gotten into ya?!" Floyd had to leave Azul's side to stop his brother as the others joined in separating the 2. Jade was struggling under the other's grip, trying to get his hand onto Leona, with a deep rage bubbling under his skin.
"oh... Did I come at the wrong time?" a voice piped in.
Azul froze in place as well as Jade, both of them eyeing Lilia with sheer fear. This was really happening. "What's the silence for? I thought you would be more happy to see me..." Lilia mumbled. "What's with you in here? The lounge's closed..." Floyd mused, still clueless.
"Oh... Dear... You don't know? I came to pick you up..."
Words that sunk into Floyd's mind like an arrow. His stomach was burying itself and his heart was squeezed in fear at those words coming from Lilia's mouth. "This is a joke... No? Jade? Azul? It's a joke... Right? It's a bad joke, guys..." Floyd said with a strained smile.
Yet Azul only looked down as well s Jade. "I am... So sorry, Floyd... I did everything I could..." Azul mumbled through tears. Jade only was silent as he made a small motion to his breast pocket, where his magic pen was. Floyd followed with his hand the said gazes that were targeted to his own pocket, fearfully touching his pen and getting it out. Tears were building in his eyes as Floyd lowered his own gaze onto the said pen.
The gem was green... A bright green Floyd oh so feared.
"No... Nonono... This can't be... You promised me... You told me we will be forever together... Right?" The boy said as tears stained his cheeks, falling on the ground. The silence though, was enough to shatter Floyd's heart.
"Floyd... I-" "No... You promised me, Jade! WHY WOULD YOU LIE TO ME?!" Floyd screamed as he pushed away his twin's attempt at a hug, then throwing his own pen on the ground. "I'm sick of this pity! Just leave me alone! All of you!" The boy declared as he turned onto his heel and ran away from Octavinelle.
"Vangrouge... Please... There must be a way to keep him..." Azul begged, on his knees, to the said Fae. "I am afraid the terms of the contract were all broken... I cannot do anything about it..." Lilia mused with a sigh. Jade only hugged Azul, caressing gently the head of the other to attempt at calming down the crying male. "Everyone... I advise you to get out immediately... Octavinelle will no longer welcome guests from other dorms for the rest of the day." The vice mused as he shooed away everyone. Lilia though, stood at the same spot.
Exhaling, the Fae crossed his arms. "It's pitiful from you... Such a sight..." "You have no words in this..." Jade snarled back. "You will have to embrace it... For his own good..." Lilia mused. Azul only wiped his tears with a trembling arm as he looked at Jade.
"He will have to accept it... Weather Floyd likes it or not..."
~~~~~~~~~
That's it for today :D
*hands tissues*
And here for y'all :3
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phat-azz-rael · 3 years ago
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Technoblade walking up to his room: The tip of your elbow is called your wenis. Do with this information as you please.
Ranboo knowing of the incoming chaos: Why would yo-
Tommy already chasing Tubbo: I'M GONNA GET YOUR WENIS AND YOU CAN'T STOP ME!
Tubbo running for his life: DONT YOU DARE TOUCH MY WENIS WITHOUT CONSENT!!!
Philza: STOP TOUCHING YOUR BROTHER'S WENIS!
Wilbur finally waking up: What the actual fu-
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