#total strangers telling me that they'd noticed me around and apparently figured out where i lived
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#okay you know what's depressing af#i just watched chappell roan's statement video about how people are treating her#and i had previously assumed the fans' behavior must be REALLY over the top if she made a whole video about it#but listening to her describe what happens to her on a regular basis made me go UMMMMM#because... almost all that shit happened to me on a practically daily basis when i lived in atlanta#like i'm not even exaggerating here. and i'm no one. not famous at ALL#this is just the way you get treated if you're a woman who spends her days walking in that city#the stuff she describes in her statement is genuinely so mild#except that it's NOT. it's totally valid for anyone to feel upset about it!#which just makes me realize once again how deeply extremely fucked up it was#that i was subjected to that shit every single fucking day for multiple years of my life#literally would not ever leave the house without noise-cancelling headphones and big reflective sunglasses#and i still had total strangers talking to me; calling to me across the street;#yelling 'compliments' at me; yelling insults at me; yelling really disgusting stuff at me#following me for blocks and blocks while cussing me out#grabbing my arm to stop me when i tried to walk away from them; or otherwise touching me without my consent#getting right up in my face all of a sudden so i legit thought i was being attacked for a moment#total strangers telling me that they'd noticed me around and apparently figured out where i lived#...i could go on for a while. but i won't. bc even just remembering it brings me down#anyway i'm not even particularly a chappell roan fan but i am feeling a lot of sad solidarity with her right now#while also thinking 'oh honey... you would not survive a month in the ATL :')'#this is one of those moments where i'm like 'oh. yeah. i guess it actually really is valid that i have legit trauma from those years. huh'#oof#street harassment cw#cosmo gyres#personal#tag rant
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tumblr is such a great website when you're trying to figure out your sexuality because apparently that's the hot topic in the world like everyone needs to know who's fucking who like it's their business, so conforming to these societal urges of strangers of "i need to know whats between your legs and also who you'd like to put there", i started questioning myself
i wanted to be able to be normal
but it didn't fit
i didn't fit
i was never actively looking for it, but i noticed that my experiences concerning relationships and sexuality kind of weren't like what i saw on tv
and i was baffled when i found out not everyone thinks that sex scenes in movies or tv shows were a goddamn waste of time and probably only made it on the screen to lengthen the epidode to their expected duration. no they were put there on purpose. and i was like why????
then i came across the term asexuality, and it was like the sky opened for angels to descend upon my horizon and sing the hymn of my people; i was literally like YES OMG THAT which i didn't say out loud because it happened while i was watching tv with my whole family and that was kinda awkward
after that i didn't put much thought into it. i made offhanded comments about it to a friend one time but i never mentioned it to anyone else because why. it's not something that just comes up in conversation and i never understood the hype around coming out (just MY opinion, i know a lot of people draw strength from saying their truth out loud YOU GO PEOPLE TELL EM SHOUT IT FROM THE ROOFTOP)
ANYWAY
the point of this is
i found tumblr and, just, all the thoughts, doubts or questions i still have about myself i never bothered to answer because i literally don't care enough about knowing myself, all of that though, just comes up on my dash. just randomly. posts that reassure me. posts that are just like OMG EXACTLY YOU PUT IT INTO WORDS
in a world where no one in my life really gets asexuality, tumblr is a place where i don't have to feel like the odd one out.
and they really wouldn't get it. my family. they'd be supportive and nice about it obviously, but i don't think they'd be able to understand really what it means and frankly i'm too awkward to explain it to them but that's also totally fine because i know they love me for me, even the parts they don't know about.
and just for myself when i think i might be faking all this for attention while i'm telling no one about it (make it make sense), ace tumblr finds me with a hot chocolate, a blanket and a hug and says hey i've put this ace feeling into words do you relate and i cry and say yes yes i do thank you ace tumblr
and then i'm fine again :)
#asexual#asexuality#ace#thank you tumblr#ace tumblr you saved my sanity#i thought i was weird#and for a lot of people i probably still am but at least i'm not alone#lgbtqia#lgbtq community#this topic just hits me at times and i have to check if i'm still ace#is my ace phase over? hm no it's been 7 years already#crazy#guess i might stay this way#lol
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Just Peachy :)
@tinymingi you asked and shall recieve :)))
Summary: Moving to a new place is always a little unnerving, luckily there’s a cute, pink haired stranger who makes you feel welcome.
Pairing: Jeong Yunho x Reader
Word Count: 1-2k words
No content warnings apply (unless you count like one swear word)
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Moving house sucks. Especially when it's to somewhere you don't know. Not that you aren't happy with it- it's amazing to even get a house these days. But it's hardly fun to deal with all the boxes and the unfamiliarity of a new place.
Even less fun when said boxes haven't arrived yet. Seeing nothing productive to do, you've decided to explore the area, there's a few hours to spare before everything arrives so you may as well acquaint yourself with what's around you.
That's how you ended up finding a cute little corner café 'The Aurora', what a cute title.
It's fairly small on the inside, though there are a few seating areas outside too, and it seems to be a rather quiet place as well, perfect for just relaxing, especially after all the work you've been doing the past week.
The barista who serves you is a rather bright character, you mean this literally as he has a few pink streaks in his hair that shine a little under the lights. His name is Yunho, you find out from the nametag, and he seems to pick up on you being a stranger.
''New to the town or just here?'' He asks, setting about on preparing your order.
''New to the town, I just moved in today actually- figured I'd explore while I wait for everything to arrive.''
''Nothing quite like walking around a new place huh?'' He says, plating everything up (not that there's much) before he slides it over the counter, telling you your total with a cheerful smile.
''Hey- If you ever want me to show you around I'd totally be down for it! There's a few little secret places here that you might not find on your own.'' He suggests, practically bouncing on the spot.
''Maybe once I've settled in a bit more.'' You supply, it's not that you don't want to hang out with him- He's just so cute you're already getting butterflies!
Yunho smiles and nods as you walk away to a table, choosing a smaller one by the window so you can people watch.
The following day you're a little more anxious, you'd told your friends about the cute barista in your new town and now they all wanted to come over to see him- and wanted you to take him up on his offer.
So that was the plan for today, get his number and arrange a day to go out- maybe get some work done too since you'd brought your laptop.
Or it was the plan until he decided to flirt with you, saying ''One angel cake and peach tea for the peachy angel!'' with a wink.
That really shouldn't have stopped you in your tracks, it was so incredibly cheesy but he's just so- aah. You're pretty sure you already have the wings of the angel cake in your stomach.
He teases you when you freeze in place at the words, watching humorously as you stutter out an excuse.
''Ah just- your hair! Your hair is really nice, th-the streaks are cute.'' You say, the colour draining from your face when you realise you'd accidentally called him cute.
Yunho grins and shoots back, ''You're pretty cute too, maybe you should dye yours too and we can match.'' he says with a chuckle, full of confidence despite the blush dusting his cheeks and the tip of his nose.
You nod and walk quickly to your table, face flushed red as you hear him laugh behind you.
Well that didn't go at all as planned.
There's always tomorrow, you think. Settling down to get some work done- it doesn't desperately need finished now, but since you're still unpacking, you figure you may as well work on it here. The atmosphere is nice and the menu is relatively cheap, you can see yourself coming here often already.
You're distracted when you see Yunho coming over to your table out of the corner of your eye, paper bag and a coffee in hand. He flashes you a smile as he stands by the chair opposite you, ''Mind if I sit here?'' he asks. He's so cute that even your shyness doesn't stop you nodding in confirmation.
He grins happily when he sits down, pulling out his sandwich as he glances at you from over your computer screen, ''So, watcha workin' on?'' He asks.
Your response to a simple question turns into spending his entire break talking. You talk about where you're from, how long he's lived and worked here, you find out that you have some common interests and when you tell him your new neighbourhood, he tells you a friend of his lives there too and he hopes you can meet him soon.
The day continues with that accidentally happening, because apparently he's described you both to each other so now his friend is eager to meet you.
''I'm Jongho.'' He introduces himself as, walking with you as you both exit the corner store.
Jongho is a lot more quiet than you'd expected from someone who's friends with Yunho, and you tell him just that.
''Yeah, nobody ever believes us when we tell them I'm younger. Yunho is kinda like a hyperactive puppy so people never think he's the older one.'' He says, clearly having told this story a million times over.
On the walk home, he entertains you with stories of Yunho and himself, saying how they'd met during high school and been practically joint at the hip ever since. You come to learn a lot about the both of them, and in the end, Jongho and you exchange numbers when he walks you to your house (what a gentleman). He teases you about not having Yunhos number yet, but says he won't give it to you and you'll have to ask him for it yourself.
You end the night with your friends practically yelling at you over text to make a move already, you'd like to see them try and not be stuck in place by Yunhos flirtatious remarks and cute smile!
Okay, third day here, you've literally exchanged numbers with his best friend, you are going to get Yunhos. Nothing will stop you this time!
Alright, nevermind, you can't do this. You've barely even stepped in the door and you're already smitten.
He's dressed way differently today. He's wearing a giant, baby blue sweater that he's practically drowning in and he's tied his hair up in a cute little ponytail. You're almost tempted to text Jongho and ask if he planned this to fuck with you.
Alright, he's cute but you have to make your move today, you've put this off for too long.
Your ordering goes as normal, getting the same as you always do before Yunho starts talking with you, nobody else is waiting to order so he just talks at the counter.
''So Jongho told me he met you yesterday, he said you got along well?'' He says, seemingly very excited that you'd met his friend.
You confirm, and talk about how the evening had went and the stories he'd told you.
Yunho groans and hides his face in embarrassment at one of them, ''Of all the stories, he tells you the sleepover ones.'' he whines, his face almost matches the pink streak in his hair.
Your conversation is interrupted when the very focus of it enters the building.
''Jongho! Why'd you have to go and embarrass me like that!'' Yunho complains despite already gathering up what you assume is Jonghos usual order.
''What? They asked for cute stories about you, so I told them.'' He says nonchalantly, sipping on his drink once it's handed to him.
''Well- I didn't ask for specifically cute stories-''
''Yes you did.''
You kind of want to hit Jonghos coconut head with a real one for this, he just finds it hilarious that you're both equally as embarrassed now.
''Which story made him react this way? The-'' He begins to list them off when Yunho interrupts him with 'The teddy one.'
''Ah, that's a classic. Still dunno what's so embarrassing about it though.'' He says.
Yunho huffs and punches his arm, ''It's embarrassing because I'm a fully grown man who couldn't sleep without a teddy bear and had to bring it to a sleepover!''
''San literally has his entire bed covered in them, none of us were going to think it was weird.''
''But still!''
The three of you pass the time once Yunho is finished for the day, he had a shorter shift so he's happy to spend the evening sitting and talking, and he shares embarrassing stories about Jongho as revenge.
By the time the building has to close, you all agree to go your separate ways. Yunho lives in the same street at the shop, Jongho is going to a friends house to study, and you don't quite feel comfortable enough with going to Yunhos house yet to continue the conversations.
He asks you to wait at the door before you leave though, claiming he left something in the kitchen and needs to go pick it up.
When he comes back, he's holding a little bag, which he hands to you.
''I've been wanting to try something new with one of the cupcakes- I was hoping you'd try it and let me know what you think?'' He asks, scratching the back of his neck nervously.
''You never said you baked.'' You say, a little surprised at the gesture.
''Ah- well I don't really bake what's on the menu, but I thought this might be an improvement so I worked on it in my free time.'' He says with a smile, fiddling with the sleeves of his sweater.
You nod and reply that you'd give the snack a try, then you part ways as you exit his neighbourhood.
When you get home and finally sit down that night, you open up the bag, noticing the cupcake in a little container and a small pouch in the bag beside it.
You open the pouch first, curious to what's inside and notice a small teabag and a note.
''Y/N. I figured you'd enjoy this with your food, It's the same brand we use at The Aurora! You seem to really like it so I thought I'd give you one.''
There's a little smiley face scribbled next to it, and below is a phone number.
Well, at least you don't have to worry about asking for it now.
Setting the note aside, you finally open up the cupcake, It's an angel cake like what you ordered before, but you notice the cream is tinted a little bit orange. Upon tasting it, you realise it's peach flavoured, matching the tea you'd usually drink with it.
You decide to finally message Yunho, sending a quick hello and thanking him for the gift.
Yunho: So, what do you think of it?
You: It’s just peachy :)
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