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depressedtransguy · 3 years ago

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don't read this unless you're @thedragonemperess or I will come to your house and shave your teeth with a razor

@angelwiththeblue-box you can also read

10/07/21

Stephen took me to the carnival for our two year anniversary yesterday night. It was... phenomenal. Normally I don't like going out so publicly on our dates, especially in something as popular as a carnival, but it might be my favorite date of ours so far. He picked me up in his dad's Lamborghini at around 7:30, just as the sun was beginning to sink below the tree line of this stupid little town, and kissed me up against the car as soon as he got his hands on me. The start of his beard pricked me lightly as we did. Then he squeezed my hand lightly and told me he had a surprise that he hoped I liked. I told him if it was from him then I'd adore it. We shared another kiss through giggles before we slipped into the car and began to drive off. Our hands were intertwined on the center console the whole time. He always told me that it was hard to keep his hands off me with me in range and my consent. God... I love him more than anything. But, anyway, the carnival. As we neared, his thumb slid over mine and he told me to close my eyes, which I properly did. He's the only one I trust enough to do that with. I could tell he was excited and a little anxious just from the way he kept squeezing my fingers. It was adorable. Even cuter when we stopped and he temporarily let go as we stopped, only to move to my side of the car and slowly lead me out onto the gravel of the parking lot, practically buzzing with anticipation. I didn't even care what it was at that point, whatever made Stephen this thrilled to show him had to be good. Then he told me to open my eyes. And Jesus Christ I think I audibly gasped. I didn't know what I was really expecting, but when the bright lights spread all throughout the fairgrounds, exploding the navy sky with color, I could swear I was in another realm. As Stephen asked me if I liked it, I noticed his eyes were nervous, so with sparkling eyes I pulled him close and told him I loved it. The smile on his face was worth everything and more. He actually told me the same thing about mine. That was before he took my hand once more and led me past the ticket taker, pulling them out of his jeans and handing them off, us receiving a smile from her as we continued walking out onto the grass. "I know it's not traditional, but when I passed this place the other day I suddenly wanted to take you here," is what he said. "We can leave any time you want." "As long as you're here, I don't care where the date is," is what I said back. And boy was I right. It didn't matter that there were a ton of other people there, they all faded into nothing but background characters as Stephen miraculously won the balloon pop game and happily gifted me a little goat stuffed animal, one that I held close to my heart as I beamed at him. As I pressed my body close to him on the roller coaster, my fingers digging tightly into his bicep, and he held me steady as I stumbled onto the platform post ride. As the ferris wheel stuttered to a stop as we sat at the top, Stephen's hand on my thigh and my hand on his shoulder, and we kissed there, surrounded by nothing but the lights and the infinite abyss of stars. Once the night was over we had slow, sappy sex in his car, too filled with adoration and the need of skin against skin for us to drive back to one of our houses. I lazily drew shapes in the mist on the windows as I was brought back to my place, my mind filled with a soft bliss, and my body feeling like I had been washed over. I had never felt more at peace. And I still did, even as we had our long goodbye kiss and I went to sleep alone, the goat pressed against my chest. I was at peace. So how the hell did I end up here?

A tear slipped off of Loki's cheek and splattered onto his messy handwriting, bleeding the words together and making the many sections of his diary incomprehensible. It made him want to cry harder. That night could very well be all he and Stephen had together, and he was destroying the only stable record of it. Loki tilted back his head and squeezed his fists as tightly as possible.

On 10/07/21, at approximately 11:27, while driving from Loki's house to his, a speeding car struck Stephen's from behind and sent him spinning out of control off a cliff and forcing him to end up upside down near the river below. The person who caused the accident is yet to be found. And Stephen had been in surgery for 17 hours by the time Loki arrived at the hospital after school, right after he had gotten the news. He was still unconscious by then and practically looked like he had been forced through a meat grinder. Loki couldn't even glance up at him anymore, it made his heart twist into knots and make him want to throw up and sob. Not because he looked disgusting, although he certainly didn't look great, it was solely because of how his state reminded him of how hurt his boyfriend was. Loki couldn't imagine how much pain he was in. The cuts and scrapes on his face, the bruises on his arms, and the absolute wreck that his hands appeared to be, it all made him want to tear the skin off his bones. It hurt so much.

With a loud curse Loki snapped his notebook shut and pressed his face into it, doing his best to clear his mind instead of thinking all that he and Stephen had had together. The late nights of 'studying', the private dates, the stolen kisses at school... it had all slipped through their fingers because of one fucking idiot on the road.

Maybe it was his fault. Maybe, despite it being a school night, Loki should have insisted on Stephen staying the night with him. None of this would have happened if he had done that. Of course it's my fault.

Although they were trembling badly and the fact that he was still on the verge of tears, Loki slowly opened his fists to check up on the mess of blood that was beginning to pool up under the curve of his claws, smeared across his pale skin and nails. As he heard the door open, Loki closed them tightly once again with only a tiny hiss of pain. It was the doctor.

"Please tell me he's going to be okay," Loki whispered after a few seconds of nothing but tentious silence between him and the doctor, the concerned expression that she had exhibited when she entered and noticed him already making his stomach churn. "I don't care if it's not the truth, please just tell me he's going to be okay."

She-Dr. Palmer, as it read on her name tag-sighed gently and walked over to the young man, placing a hand on his shoulder as she sat down next to him. He didn't consider that a good sign. "I'm not going to lie to you hon. But let me ask first. How are you connected to Stephen?"

"He's-*hic*-he's my boyfriend."

"Alright honey. I'll give you the bad news first. His hands have suffered an extreme amount of nerve damage to his hands, and the surgeries so far have done nothing to correct them. It's looking like his hands are irrefutably damaged. He's never going to be able to use them normally again. But that's only if he comes out of the coma, which he only has a 50% chance of," Dr. Palmer explained as gently as was possible as it was to tell a teenager how badly his partner was injured.

It was like Loki's already broken heart shattered. The previous night could very well have been their last time together. And sure, it was perfect, but was he satisfied with never being with Stephen again? "What?" Loki choked out.

"I am so sorry. I truly am, but there is some good news. The probability of his awakening has only been getting higher, so that 50% chance of him not coming out of the coma could very easily become zero percent in no time. And you can help with that too."

For the first time since the school day did Loki look hopeful. "I can? How?"

"Talk to him. Despite his state, he can hear you in there. Talk about your time together, the past- I know it might hurt you, and please don't push yourself out of your comfort zone, but do what you can. Okay?"

With a bit of hesitation Loki slowly nodded, once again removing his nails from his palms. "Okay. I can do that," he told her.

Dr. Palmer gave him a small smile and gently patted him on the back before she stood up again, quickly checking Stephen's vitals, and then left to most likely check on another patient. Loki then took advantage of the silence and pushed his chair over to Stephen's bedside, ignoring the blood smearing on the chair's armrests as he did so. He still stared down at his lap once he was close, fearing breaking down in tears for what seemed like the hundredth time, but he did have the courage to lift up one of his own hands and rest it on his bicep. "Hey." An immediate voice crack wasn't a great start. Not that he knew any other way to begin. Any thoughts of their past two years together made Loki want to sob, now especially since he knew that he could very possibly never make any new ones with him. But he couldn't just stay silent. He had to say something, anything to make his guilt of not making Stephen stay the night with him lessen just a little bit. And according to the doctor, talking about their happy memories together could actually help. Hopefully. But it was nonetheless better than crying his eyes out for no reason. "Remember how we started dating?" Loki paused as if he was asking for an answer. "We were sophomores. You were in my chemistry class, and I always thought you were really cute, but I was too scared to talk to you and you were too nervous to, so we passed nothing but awkward glances and sarcastic comments for months on end. Until we got paired up for a project and you asked for my number. I gave it enthusiastically of course. From there we started talking and flirting a bit, although still too anxious to actually make a move, until you grabbed me when we were in the library and pushed me up against the back wall and asked to kiss me. You can guess what my response was." He chuckled dryly. "I might be able to say that I was already in love with you when you pulled back for air and gave me that little gorgeous smirk of yours, pulled my hips to yours, and whispered 'can I do it again?'. I was putty in your hands in the Greek philosophy section."

Loki quickly fell silent at the mention of his hands. With a small swallow, he managed to continue with a low voice. "When we were science class partners, you would tell me about how much you wanted to become a doctor. A neurosurgeon to be specific. I didn't exactly know why yet, you told me that a few months into our romantic relationship, but I eagerly listened about your plans for Columbia nonetheless. Not that-" he was crying again, "-not that that'll be possible now." Loki cleared his throat and tried to wipe his tears away with his trembling hands. "Even if you wake up." The student began to gently stroke his boyfriend's bandaged bicep while still staring at his lap, watching water splash onto where the excess of his oversized hoodie was rolled up and darkened the gray fabric.

It was Stephen's hoodie.

Using his feet, Loki slowly began to push his chair back until he eventually hit the wall, bunching his hands up in the hoodie's collar and raising it up to his nose, inhaling the signature cologne that he had fallen in love with over the last two years. The hood was soon flipped over his head and his knees were brought up to his chest, curling himself into the fetal position, and then finally letting all his tears out into the secure housing of Stephen's smell. That's where he had always been safe, and no matter either of their states, it still worked. Loki actually fell asleep like that after half an hour or so.

Stephen's parents found him in the morning and called Loki's family, and Thor ended up carrying him back home.

But as soon as he woke up he went back to the hospital. He wasn't missing the possibility of Stephen waking up.

10/31/21

I've still been going to school. Because my parents want me to. But I'm not doing well. My grades are beginning to sink from it, and the teachers don't care. I can't focus in class, I'm just thinking about if Stephen's going to wake up or not. What if he's waking up alone while I'm in Calculus? What if he flatlines when I'm in history? There's just too many probabilities. I don't give a shit about my grades, I just want Stephen back. I know that's such a stupid little kid thing to say since we are high schoolers, but it's been two years! And he's shown me so much love and care in that time that I don't know what I'd do without him. Not that anyone else seems to care. This is why I want Stephen back, he's the only friend I have left. In real life friend I mean. And I don't say that like I'm attached to his hip all the time, we have our own private time that I respect, but they all moved away. Why am I defending myself to a notebook? God this hospital is making me crazy. Stephen looks better, which I'm really glad about. Dr. Palmer tells me I've helped a lot by staying and talking to him, he should most likely wake up soon, but she did tell me that I can go home soon instead of only leaving for school and for showering. But I'm not doing that. At least not until he wakes up. If- WHEN he wakes up, I bet I'll get a lecture for not taking care of myself well enough just for him, so I'll probably be forced to go home more. God, I want him to lecture me. Just to hear his voice again. It's been over three weeks. I don't think I've worn anything besides underwear that isn't his. Jeans, sweatpants, shirts, hoodies, everything. It's the least I can do to replace the feeling of him being with me. At this time, I can't help but think of our Halloween's together. The first one we weren't even a month into dating, so we just bought a bunch of candy and ate candy at home while watching horror movies. But the next year, after a full 12 months of being in love, we dressed up as Gomez and Morticia Addams. Stephen looked unfairly hot in that striped suit with his hair slicked back and a teasing smile on his face. That was some good sex we had later on. Stephen said he had a thing for the dress I had on, as well as the red lipstick, which I believe since his hands barely left my hips the entire time I had it on. He also grinned from ear to ear when he saw the lipstick kiss marks I put on his collar. I love him. God I do. Please... I need him back.

Loki closed the notebook after his last few words of desperation and slipped his pencil behind his ear, raising his head up to look at Stephen with glassy eyes. He looked peaceful. By then all his scrapes and cuts were mostly healed, which made him look way better, but his hands were still pinned up in suspended holds with ragged scars lining his rough skin. More surgeries had been done on them, and Dr. Palmer once again said that he would be permanently disabled when he woke. Once again it hurt Loki's heart to think about how much pain that he must be in. The swollen scars didn't look like they felt nice. "I'm so sorry," Loki whispered as he reached up to his face and gently brushed his overgrown hair out of his face, still feeling guilty about the incident. "If I just made you stay you would still be here with me." Moving around the bed's guard rail, Loki sat on the edge of the mattress and sunk his fingers into his thick hair once more, gently toying with it as he began to talk again. "Remember junior prom? It was on February 26th; on the same night as the public prom that the school had put together. (We wanted to be alone.) You put on this navy blue suit of yours that perfectly brings out your eyes, and I bought this short green dress that made you grab my ass as soon as I came out of the house. You gave me an Agapanthus corsage that you had made yourself. And then, you kissed me, and told me that the flower meant 'never-fading love'. Like ours." A tear fell down Loki's cheek and plopped down onto Stephen's bare bicep. "I don't exactly know where me telling this story was going, my mind is a bit fuzzy and has been for weeks, hospitals being bad places to sleep plus depression isn't really an equation for good sleep, so I'll just say this. I'm not going anywhere until you return. And when you do, I'm not leaving either. Your recovery, physical therapy, going back to school, I'm going to be by your side. Okay?" Loki gently kissed Stephen's forehead and continued to stroke his hair, his other hand resting on the crook of his elbow and gently stroking his skin as if he was soothing him. "So please wake up."

With one last small peck Loki reluctantly slipped off the bed to enter the hospital bathroom, quickly using the bathroom before rubbing the sink water on his face as if that would wake him up from the haze that he had been living in, just moving from the hospital to school to the hospital to school and so on so forth. It was just a cycle of being depressed and near and being depressed and far. Fun.

Just deciding to repress his emotions for the billionth time that month, Loki shoves it down and goes back out into the main room, taking a book of Hamlet out of his bag to pass the time before he uncomfortably fell asleep in the chair. Most likely in just an hour or two since it was almost midnight. Every time he knocked unconscious in the overly small hospital chair with no support whatsoever, in front of the bed that Stephen laid in, Loki missed their cuddling more and more. Stephen's arms around him and his nose buried in the back of his neck was always the highlight of Loki's day/night. And it had been weeks since he was actually held. And by god did he need it.

But these thoughts quickly made him feel selfish. The thought that he was whining about not being held or not having his boyfriend confirmed as okay while Stephen had been struck disabled and in a coma sickened him to his core. More and more guilt stacked on top of his chest until he felt like he couldn't breathe, forced to snap his book shut and slam it on the floor. Why did everything have to hurt so much even though he didn't have a scar on him to show as evidence of his pain? It just made him feel so fake.

Loki sunk down into his seat and covered his once again teary eyes with his palms, bouncing his leg against the floor and digging his nails into his bare forehead, letting everything crash over him like a third wave tsunami. Not as extreme as the first, but it just made the present damage worse. Stop it. Stop it. STOP it. STOP IT. Loki was three seconds away from screaming out all the pain in his heart. But then he heard a groan that didn't belong to him echo in the otherwise empty room.

His palms flew to his thighs and he looked up at Stephen.

And his eyes were open!

With a gasp Loki jumped up from his chair and cupped his boyfriend's face, trying not to get too close to shock him, but just needing to hold him and let him see him. "Stephen, you're up!"

"Dewdrop... what happened?"

The student wanted to cry. He could speak. His voice was a bit strained, clearly tired and weary from lack of use, but it was there and that was all that counted. But besides that, the question couldn't be ignored. "You were in a crash baby, right after you left my house. Someone tail-boned you and you skidded off a cliff. Darling... it's Halloween."

"What?!"

Maybe he could have put it better. But Loki didn't really know how to explain it in any other way. "It's okay, darling, it's okay. Please, just focus on me for a second. Could you do that? Not the pain, not the fact that it's three and a half weeks later than you can remember, please look at my eyes and focus on me," he instructed as best he could, gently stroking his cheekbones with his thumbs and praying that he didn't glance down at his hands that he most likely could barely feel. He wanted to break that to him gently.

"I can do that."

"Alright, good. So yes, you were in a car crash and have been in a coma for about 25 days. Most of your scrapes, cuts, and bruises, have thankfully been healed. But your hands... they were crushed on impact.

#i hope you like it #to delete later #i am totally not hella nervous #lower your expections #now #do it

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sodomygf · 4 years ago

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got tagged by @degenerate-perturbation to talk about Women and i was like man. i never remember shit off the top of my head. then i wrote down some women on a sticky note and managed to sort it all out. not really a list of my top ten favorites as much as a list of Girls I Enjoy. Women I Appreciate.

1. Sera - Dragon Age. sera my beloved. she’s my absolute favorite dragon age character and the fact that a fringe group of weirdos are so insistent upon hating her only makes me love her more. she’s adorable and i think about her constantly. singlehandedly makes inquisition my favorite game. i’m down that bad.

2. Meg - Hades. HOT. i liked meg from the moment i saw her and i will fully admit that a huge part of it is me finding her attractive. i also just really like her and zagreus’s dynamic. i like these two exes feeling out their relationship after one comes to grow into himself as a person.

3. Sumi & Chizuru - Rent-a-Girlfriend. since these two are from the same trashy anime i figured i’d just slap them down here together. on a personal level, i really like sumi because her design and personality are soooo cute. and she’s super sweet. on a meta level i like chizuru because she really is the only option for that simp boy we’re all meant to project on. she’s literally the perfect girl. i adore her.

4. Risa Koizumi - Lovely Complex. mostly on here because lovely complex is my comfort show. risa is peak dumbass representation and i like her so much. i think about her and otani all the time. also i just like that lovely complex is an anime that frames risa as more of a pursuer than a passive figure in her love story. it’s nice.

5. Haru - Beastars. this rabbit FUCKS and there’s nothing you can do about it. i think haru being like, canonically promiscuous and into that because of the power it gives her as a #short queen made me experience some sort of Gender. and also just surprised me because i figured it would be a bev marsh situation (another Woman i like who did not happen to make the list) but it wasn’t! what a legend. i have a whole playlist about her, actually.

6. Sabran & Ead - Priory of the Orange Tree. love this book. these lesbians made me so insane. the tenderness of That One Scene that lives in my head rent free... man.

7. Kazusa - O Maidens in Your Savage Season. all the girls in the series are good but i personally projected onto kazusa. i also projected on hongo, but in a sort of negative way. when women have self image issues my brain is like wow.... relateable.

8. Eleanor Shellstrop - The Good Place. i’ve been meaning to rewatch the good place forever because i just really love the whole show. eleanor is one of those characters who really charms me with humor and her growth as a person makes me kind of emotional. and since i’m talking about her i guess it’s pertinent to say. i really really love chidi, so she probably would’ve gotten the spot due to chidi proximity regardless.

9. Maru - Stardew Valley. this science girl is so underrated. we’ve been married for 2 years and have 2 children on my main save, and i thank yoba for this every day. she’s so sweet and smart and charming.

10. Entrapta - She Ra. i like women who are smarter than me. entrapta is my favorite character in the whole show because of that and her questionable morals. i love a queen who will do anything in the pursuit of knowledge.

11. Violet - Violet Evergarden. bonus because i haven’t really stopped thinking about this sad sad girl since i started watching the show with ed. we’re not at the end yet but honestly it’s got so much in it that i like and violet is part of that. her slowly growing to recognize and understand her own feelings (and suffering) moved me, a curmudgeonly little guy. also i think she is an allegory for jesus christ.

honorable mention.

Daisy Tonner - The Magnus Archives. everyone has to have their fucking hot takes on the cops from the magnus archives and it’s like can you people shut up. saw a long ass post about if it’s moral to write daisy as butch or femme and as a certified black person who does not like cops i wish you people would stop being so performatively woke about this podcast and i hope the fact that it’s officially ended will help you all heal from terminally online disease. also i always pictured her being really hot. i love a morally objectionable fake woman.

talk about women or Else. (there is no else. just if you want to rant about girls i guess) @weredilf, @hyperactiveadhd, @co27, @tazwikia, kathryn if you’re reading this it won’t let me tag you’re blog but you’re also included. begone.

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elencelebrindal · 5 years ago

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Honest Opinion - Lucifer

Hell yeah, Lucifero!

Overall score (character, not looks): 10/10

The comparison is longer than my opinion on him for a reason: there is a little bit more background explanation than there was in my entries for Athena, Poseidon and Eris. It needed to be done.

Part 1

I almost gave him a lower score for the bad voice acting he had in the first Italian dub, but honestly? I can’t. I love this character. It’s an amazing antagonist and and a clever villain, that only lost because of “this is an anime, so the hero has to win against the villain”.

He is evil, ruthless and vengeful, and uses other deities to his advantage, to have even more power at his disposal, instead of only counting on “lesser” people to aid him. Also, he actively tries to get rid of his weakness - that being the Gold Cloths’ light - by killing the Gold Saints before appearing in person at the Sanctuary. Something I’ve almost never seen happen in anime, since villains generally show up and then try to destroy what could be a problem for them. Loved it. Lucifer tortures his victims, he’s vicious, and his capability only makes things even more terrifying. Not only that, but he surrounded himself with warriors who actually succeeded in slow down their opponents, to the point of only one Bronze Saint managing to be of help.

On top of that, even though I have a weak spot for villain that are this sadistic and evil, I liked how he tried to plead at the end, clearly showing his fear op being plummeted once again in darkness. This made the character alive, instead of keeping him two-dimensional by only throwing in everyone’s faces his power. I loved how perfectly he was depicted as a villain, with him looking amused at Athena’s suffering as she slowly sacrificed her life, but that’s not the only thing a villain should exist for and thankfully they gave him more than that.

Obviously, the fact he targeted Athena and wanted her life in exchange for world salvation doesn’t make the slightest bit of sense, but what can we do, Saint Seiya keeps putting her even where she doesn’t belong.

Part 2 - Comparison with mythological character and biblical character

Yeah, you heard correctly. Lucifer isn’t just a - to make things short - fallen angel.

In Greek-Roman mythology, Lucifer is a god of light, son of Eos and Astraeus. His name was given to Venus, and was either Phosphoros or Heosphoros. Though, Lucifer wasn’t adored as a deity in the Roman period, despite his planet being associated with lots of deities. And honestly, if Saint Seiya had to put Athena in Lucifer backstory (which, again, is so fucking stupid), it would have been way better to use this version of Lucifer, instead of the biblical one. But who am I to say this, just a humble wannabe blogger with a couple people reading my stuff.

Now, for the most common knowledge, let’s address the elephant in the room first. Lucifer and Satan are not the same being. Even though they both represent Evil, they’re different: Satan wants to drag humanity into materiality, making everyone recognize themselves in the lower aspects of creation, want to bind humanity to Earth; Lucifer is the Devil, who wants to awaken humanity’s free will exalting pride and selfishness, the Tempter.

Moreover, the term “Lucifer” only appears in the Old Testament when prophet Isaiah uses it for the king of Babylon, a city associated with sin and perdition. Because of that, and because of the Holy Scriptures, Lucifer was identified with the Satan of Job.

There also exist a gnostic current that reinterprets Lucifer as salvific and liberating from God’s tyranny, since he was the one leading humanity to knowledge, opposed to the supreme god who wanted subjects and slaves. In this doctrine the name Satan disappears completely and the name Lucifer gets interpreted as “bringer of light”. This current in particular can be used as a comparison with Lucifer in Saint Seiya, since he claims salvation of the world is possible as long as there’s a sacrifice.

And of course, the most perfect comparison is the “classic” story, of him being rejected by God and thrown down to Earth. What’s important here is not confusing him with Satan, despite the similarities even in this particular situation: Satan was a beautiful and wise cherub, who’s fault was wanting to be superior to God; Lucifer was the perfect creature of God, superior to angels, who was thrown into Hell after refusing to adore Jesus Christ. Let’s not get them confused, shall we? Following this, I can finally compare the original Lucifer with his counterpart: in short, not bad. In long, in Saint Seiya, Lucifer was banished from heaven because of him declaring war against God, wanting to dominate all creation. Something that is not entirely wrong, since he was a rebel, but it’s also wrong enough for me to frown at his adaptation.

#saint seiya #i cavalieri dello zodiaco #los caballeros del zodiaco #os cavaleiros do zodiaco #knights of the zodiac #deities #lucifer #lucifero #the warriors of the final holy battle #my opinion #honest opinion

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demicorpse · 6 years ago

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My qualms with the Animorphs ending. (Spoilers, duh)

So. Around a week ago I finished all 54 of the core Animorphs books, and like many, I was pretty disappointed by the ending. I’d even go as far as to say I was angry about it. Not angry enough to write a rant tweet at the main author, but angry enough to rant about it on a tumblr post where 10 people might see it and agree with me. I’m going to list some of the main issues regarding the last few books, as well as the final book itself. Let’s take it from the top.

The Auxiliary Animorphs.

On paper? This doesn’t seem like a bad idea. Writing in a bunch of handicapped kids and giving them cool powers, while also slowly developing them and not focusing on just their disabilities? Sounds great! Only Applegate didn’t exactly understand what that meant. The Aux. Animorphs are introduced in book 50, The Ultimate, and after a big battle, they’re almost immediately moved to the sidelines. They’re mentioned in passing as ‘James and his group’ when they’re needed to provide a distraction or maybe fight some kind of battle, but other than that, and maybe some characterization of the kids in book 50, we don’t learn a whole lot about ‘James and his group’. I get it. Balancing so many new faces is hard, especially when your series in ending in 4 books, but maybe you could’ve... I don’t know... lessened the scope of the group? Or maybe you could’ve introduced them earlier, so that we can, at the very least, gain a glimpse towards what they’re like? We know so much about the main Animorphs, but when it comes down to the Aux. Animorphs, all I remember is that James wanted Pedro, his best friend forever, to get a morph of his own (which never really developed into anything? Or maybe Applegate forgot to explicitly state he’s part of the group, but, whatever.), and that in the end, they all die namelessly. Again, as part of a distraction tactic. A bunch of handicapped kids who were told the world is being taken over by aliens are introduced, and all they do is die at the end. No mention of them whatsoever in the ending book, after the war was ended. Not even a single page regarding how brave they were, to just trust the Animorphs despite how crazy they sound, and fight by their side, even LOSE one of their own before they all die a book later.

It’s stupid. The Aux. Animorphs could’ve been so much cooler had Applegate wasn’t so deeply invested in her ‘these books tell a war story!’ thing. They had potential to be memorable, and yet, I don’t even remember the names of the main kids that were intro’d in their book. Just James. By the way, James was a way better leader than Jake by the end. Actually, let’s talk about Jake.

Jake’s character was brutally murdered and replaced with an evil clone. So was Rachel’s.

Reading the last few books was, honestly, a festival of awkward and head-shaking moments for me. You mean to tell me that this is where Jake breaks? Jake, the leader of the Animorphs, the one who’s kept the alive, the one who’s brought them together when they thought they wouldn’t be able to make it, Jake, Marco’s best friend, Cassie’s boyfriend, Rachel’s cousin, JAKE, breaks at the end and sacrifices everything. His cousin? A sacrifice. The Aux. Animorphs and one of the only military officials willing to listen to him and his men? A sacrifice.

I can’t put it into words how disappointed I am over both Jake and Rachel. Jake turned into a monster. He turned into someone he vowed he never would turn into. Remember when he said, like, two books before the end: “Defeat the Yeerks. Don’t become them.” What the hell happened to that when you flushed down 17 thousand Yeerks into space and let them freeze to death?

Don’t get me started on his hatred towards Cassie by the end (which is 100% totally fixed when she has a mental breakdown don’t worry guys ahahaha fuck I fucked up their relationship and now I can’t really fix it well enough ok they hugged and they’re ok now). Like, I get it. I get it, Jake. You lost the morphing cube and Tom because Cassie thought she’d do something good. But is he seriously daft enough to just disregard any reasoning for what she did and go around acting like a child who got his toy taken away? Isn’t he the one that’s supposed to move on from things quickly? Just... Jake isn’t the same character by the end, but it’s not even a fluid change. It’s so drastic that when you’re reading it, it’s like a completely different character was introduced into the Animorphs with no explanation whatsoever. Yeah, war changes people, but Marco stayed the same. Tobias, more or less, stayed the same. Ax changed, but that was after the war, and it was for the better. Cassie stayed the same.

Jake should’ve been written better. Because if he was, he wouldn’t have gotten so many people killed, including himself right at the end.

And, oh God, Rachel... what have they done to you? Rachel went from someone who likes the thrill of the fight (admittedly, maybe a little too much) and is capable of making smart decisions, to someone who’s willing to drive over a military general even though he’s simply asking her to stop (in a truck full of EXPLOSIVES no less), as well attempt to hit Cassie in anger (good thing Tobias is her moral compass) after she confesses that she let Tom go on purpose. Hey, while we’re at it, let’s talk about her death.

Rachel’s death is stupid.

Let’s get one thing out of the way: Rachel is my favourite character in Animorphs, second close being Ax. I’m obviously upset about her death, so I’m sorry if I sound a little biased.

Rachel’s death is plain dumb and stupid and shouldn’t have happened. It wouldn’t have happened had Applegate not convinced herself that all of her character deserve to suffer and die by the end, leaving a hopeless pit in my stomach after I closed the .PDF to the final book. You’re telling me that one of the most fierce human warriors I’ve read about in my entire life just gives up at the end. She spits out Tom’s body, demorphs, and that’s it. She gives up. Doesn’t even attempt to go down fighting. She just says some cliche line to Tobias and dies. I will give Applegate credit for creating one of the best post-death scenes I’ve ever read (”You mattered.” is so good), but that doesn’t redeem her death in my eyes. She’s killed off because Applegate claims Animorphs is a ‘war story’. A war story in which kids turn into animals, alien slugs crawl into people’s ears and control them, time travel happens on more than one occasion, and Ax is Tobias’ uncle. Sure. War story. Since it’s a war story, there’s no hope for any of the characters. But I’ll get to that at the end.

Anyway, Rachel shouldn’t have died. No amount of convincing will have me think otherwise. I don’t care how reckless she was described as, she’s not reckless enough to go on a suicide mission and die to make the reader feel upset. Plus, if Jake was SO hellbent on winning, why couldn’t he have sent James up there to deal with Tom? It’s not like he cared about the fates of the Aux. Animorphs by that point, so why not have one less trauma on your head and send in someone you see as disposable? At least let Jake retain some of his intelligence, Applegate.

Oh, yeah, the ending.

The ending is hopeless, and if you thought your characters’ struggles will pay off, fuck you.

“Ram the Blade Ship”, Jake says with Rachel’s smile, and seconds later, he and his friends die in a horrible explosion in space, limbs either blown apart or frozen. Oh, and Ax has been assimilated into some omnipotent entity that comes quite literally out of nowhere, so it’s safe to say that he’s classified as ‘dead’. The only one left on Earth is Cassie, who has to live with the fact that she’s the last Animorph left alive. Thinking about it, it’s pretty funny that the only one who lives in the end is Cassie, who always advocated for a more peaceful approach, if possible. Great irony, Applegate. 10/10.

Anyway, this whole thing stinks. Applegate claims the ending is up to interpretation (I think, from what I’ve read in her epilogue it certainly seems that way), but I think it’s bullshit. She claims there’s no happy endings in war. That’s bullshit. I can’t express how... just bullshit the ending is.

These kids who have fought for 3 years, these kids who have shed blood, sweat, and multiple tears across 54 books and several spin-offs, these kids who went through so much and where a ‘win’ barely counted as that, these kids get... nothing. No one is happy. Even Marco, who was relatively happy with his post-war life is dragged into Jake’s suicide mission, only to die alongside him, because poor Jake couldn’t get over the fact that he didn’t think of a better plan to save both his cousin and his brother.

No, thinking on it, they DO get something! They get death and an ‘open’ ending, which is just as open as Chick-fil-A on a Sunday. When you make a reader constantly read through HEAPS of books about how depressed these kids are, about their struggles and their failures and how they never really win anything, they mostly react to their enemies’ movements, it just makes the reader feel hopeless. And so by the end, when you just kill off everyone but a single character that knew better, the reader feels sad, and angry, and upset. And maybe Applegate wanted to go for that.

Conclusion. Jesus Christ, Applegate.

The job of a writer is to string words together well enough to make people feel an emotion, whether negative or positive. And admittedly, she achieved that. But in my opinion, I’d rather close Animorphs knowing that these kids know at least some form of peace. That Jake rescues his brother and he can live out his life alongside him. That Rachel survives and that she can attend high-end fashion shows. That Tobias and his mother (who isn’t mentioned at all at the end, by the way? Guess she wasn’t important enough to the plot!) make up all the time they’ve lost when Tobias didn’t know she actually cared about him. That Marco does his thing, being a comedian, in peace, and visits Jake and his friends whenever he wants to. That Cassie pursues her own career and yeah, maybe she’s not together with Jake anymore, but at the very least, they’re happy to see one another. That Ax avenges his brother by killing Visser Three/One, and becomes a War Hero in his world, as well as a very good War Prince, and that he doesn’t forget to visit his second home.

Whether you liked the ending or not, this is the kind of ending I was hoping for. Something to ease me at the end. Something that would make me feel good after reading so much about the lives of 4 human kids, a half-bird half-boy, and an alien. But no. I get despair. I get death and I get sadness and I get an empty feeling in my heart that will always remain so as long as I remember Animorphs. Because no matter how much I’ll try and rewrite the ending, it’ll always stick with me, this one thought: Everybody dies and no one is happy.

Animorphs has war, but it’s not a war story. Animorphs has tactics, strategy, guerilla warfare, espionage, but it’s not a war story. And even if I’m wrong, even if it is a war story, why can’t the characters be happy? Why can’t the characters get the one bit of compensation for their struggles?

Maybe I’m just too much of an optimist, and none of this matters. Maybe I should get used to bad endings, because let’s face it, this isn’t a good ending, or even a neutral one. This is as bad as it gets. Maybe I should suck it up and grow some thick skin.

But God damn, the ending to Animorphs sucked.

#animorphs #animorphs rant #rant #long post #ive had this sitting for a week #tldr: what a joke.

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copperbadge · 7 years ago

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Infinity War: A Review As Long As The Movie Itself

Okay, so I saw Infinity War a second time and most of my thoughts were unchanged plus I had one cool new one, and I have had a lot more sleep now than I had in the early part of the week. So I think now I’m good to talk about it.

This is mostly a series of observations rather than a coherent review. Spoilers, very obviously, below the cut. If you are on mobile and can’t see a cut below before a massive wall of text, please scroll fast if you don’t want to be spoiled.

1. I mentioned this before but this movie does feel like a series of video game cut scenes. Part of that is visual -- more than any other MCU movie, there are times when Infinity War is an animated film. There are a lot of moments where it’s just straight-up CGI with maybe Josh Brolin’s eyeballs. The two most noticeable ones are Thanos waking up with the soul stone and Thanos and Iron Man fighting on Titan, probably because Thanos is, uh, he’s not always very convincingly animated and the new model for Iron Man is a bit on the uncanny-valley side (the head in particular is weird).

But also, there is so much to cram into the movie that every scene has to dump a lot of info pretty quickly. Which is not necessarily bad -- they do it very deftly -- but it means we get a series of tastes rather than a good main course. We get hints of where Steve, Sam, Wanda, and Natasha have been, but no real information, and it’s treated as if it’s basically irrelevant. We see Wanda and Vision in a secret-romance situation, but we never really see anything about why their relationship works or how they got there. The same with Peter and Gamora. There’s been bedrock laid down for these relationships in previous films, but there’s no building on that bedrock. And when you get to non-romantic relationships that gets even thinner because it’s difficult to no-homo a male friendship in the time allotted and 90% of the characters in these movies are male so there’s a shitload of relationships that fall by the wayside.

I had some interesting conversations about how Peter Parker’s death scene was really dramatic and carried a ton of impact for Tony, and that’s good, but that is a scene I think Bucky and Steve should also have gotten and couldn’t because the no-homo in a very obviously parent-child relationship is much easier to convey. (Also because of a later point I’ll get to, see 10, where Tony and Peter in the Death Scene have to stand in for literally every other relationship.)

2. A thirtysomething heterosexual white boy mad about his girlfriend doomed half the universe. Peter Quill’s lack of self-control indirectly caused the death of trillions when he punched Thanos, and that’s all I could think about during that scene. It’s so funny and so unfunny at the same time, because while it’s a (perhaps unintended) commentary on a lot of recent mass violence in America I am 100% sure that he will not suffer consequences for it. I mean, yes, he’s dead as a consequence, but LBR he’s not staying dead and when he’s back alive again he will suffer no ill will from anyone lasting longer than five minutes of Tony yelling, maybe.

Also, I get that Thanos is big and strong but surely cutting his arm off would have been faster than pulling the glove off. I would imagine there are all kinds of arguments against it (he can still control it if his hand’s still in it, cutting his arm off would wake him, etc), but I’m pretty sure “narrative necessity” is the top one.

3. I’m uncomfortable with all the Holocaust-y blown-to-ash imagery in the Death Scene following hard on the heels of, and then being followed itself by, a bunch of scenes that really seem to want to make us sympathize with the person who caused it, including one where he walks on water. (I can already hear people saying “It’s dust not ash” and that’s a conversation people can have if they want but in a moment that Gamora explicitly describes as a genocide in which trillions of people die because of a so-called lack of resources, which was, you know, a real Hitler talking point in the thirties, I’m not only reading it as ash, I’m reading it as a very specific kind of ash, and that’s not gonna change.)

There is so much time spent on trying to make Thanos sympathetic in this movie. I get that they want him to come off as if he believes he’s the hero, because that’s basic good-villain writing 101. But less sympathy for the devil could have allowed room for the actual heroes to get some more character development. Thanos is so ludicrously over-powered by the time we meet him that I don’t really give a shit why he does what he does, and if the story IS a commentary on the brutality of genocide, then like, we don’t really want to be sympathizing with the guy committing it.

But because of all this, what I am hoping for in part two is a real hardcore demonstration of how evil he truly is to balance how sympathetic they tried to play him here. We see hints of his monstrosity under a veil of self-assumed virtue in this movie, occasionally. There’s the torture of Nebula, of course, and Eitri’s hands are also evidence. We have enough to see that he’s not just a crusader, he’s also able and eager to torment and maim. So I’m hopeful for more of that and less of his Purple Man’s Burden in part two.

Related to this is a scene where Thanos says one thing that I think is really vital to his monstrosity, though I doubt this was intentional: he says it will be an objective genocide, “Rich and poor alike.” Really, we know that wealth causes excess consumption and hoarding of resources; you don’t have to kill half the population to balance its resources. You just have to kill the richest. However you feel about capitalism or wealth accumulation, whether you think killing the rich is justifiable, if you’re going to just slaughter a bunch of people in order to fix shit, you slaughter fewer for a much higher ROI if you slaughter the rich. That’s just....accounting. And the fact that Thanos doesn’t acknowledge this says to me that at the end of the day he wants the power of life and death, and he has no justification for it. But the problem is that I don’t believe the writers examined that line themselves or even thought of it, which makes me worried about whether we will get an expression of Thanos’s evil without a justification of his actions in part two.

4. I’ve never seen Peter Dinklage in anything other than this, and after seeing the film for the first time I asked a friend, “IS he a terrible actor in everything? I didn’t think so, people seem to like him, but he’s dreadful in this.” The second time round, it was pointed out to me that they’re artificially slowing his voice, which makes him seem ludicrously overacted. Sorry, Peter Dinklage, I misjudged you, and this movie done wrong by you.

5. Normally I don’t fully enjoy Rocket in the Guardians movies because there’s just a lot of him and the 2-3 jokes (what is he, he likes to murder, he’s a jerk) get old fast. I enjoyed him in this, because he got what I feel is the appropriate amount of screen time vis a vis the rest of the movie, and also Bucky picking him up was super funny.

6. Bucky’s face when he sees the arm and asks where the fight is, weep loudly if you agree. Sebastian Stan can say more with his face than some actors can with a full on monologue. Also I am writing a fanfic about Bucky’s time on a Wakandan farm, working title: “My Dumb Goats.”

7. Literally nobody saw Sam Wilson die and I’m circulating a petition about it. Come on, at least give him a witness. Fuck. I think Sam’s death actually hit me the hardest because there wasn’t even anyone there to say goodbye to him.

8. I gasped when Red Skull pulled his cowl down, oh my Jesus what a moment.

9. The first time I saw Captain America: Winter Soldier, when Bucky stood up without the mask, a woman behind me said, “Oh my god, it’s his BEST FRIEND,” with amazement in her voice. Watching Infinity War, when Gamora started going off about how Thanos doesn’t love anything, the guy in the seat next to me said, “Oh no, IT’S YOU.” I sometimes really enjoy going to movies surrounded by people who aren’t in fandom and don’t read subtext as quickly as fandom does.

10. Here’s my new theory that is maybe not new and has been super obvious to everyone else forever. Preface: it’s not that I didn’t know Iron Man is in a shitload of the Marvel movies, or that I didn’t find that significant. We know that “I am Iron Man” is frequently considered the start of the MCU timeline even though Steve Rogers was the first avenger, and the first Iron Man film is iconic within the MCU (though they have never gone back to it for visual or thematic inspiration which is frustrating).

But it seems really evident now, having seen part one of two and having seen Tony Stark in it, that not only is this “his” film in many ways, but the MCU to date is Tony Stark’s saga. Maybe I’m just slow to pick this up, but when he says Thanos has been in his head for six years, it was an indicator -- inadequate, see my Cut Scene theory, but still, it made me realize -- that the Avengers films and even many of the character films post-Avengers (Civil War and Homecoming, most obviously) are the story of Tony’s struggle with the shadow of Thanos up through his face-to-face confrontation with him.

Like, we’ve seen that it’s something Tony grapples with, but I hadn’t realized that grappling was the entire point. In Age of Ultron, Ultron actually become a macguffin, he becomes a secondary indicator of Tony’s obsession with Thanos rather than a villain in his own right, which almost makes me want to watch that movie again even though I hated it. The vision of death and destruction Wanda gives Tony is Thanos-driven, and all his actions in every film post-Avengers are motivated by his fear of and antipathy for Thanos, even if he doesn’t yet know his name or face. And this is why Strange gives up the Time stone to save Tony, because that one win in fourteen million losses depends on Tony Stark.

This is also why Peter Parker and Tony get a lot of time to bicker like family about nothing in particular throughout this film, leading up to the one true dramatic death scene in the Death Scene -- because for time’s sake they could really only pick one death to fully engage with, and it had to be the one affecting Tony, and we had to see them bonding to see WHY it affected Tony. He’s got to be the one to end Thanos, one way or another, and will likely be some form of uniting factor among the surviving heroes in the climax of part two. Which, I have a significant level of admiration for how deftly that process has taken place, even if I know that it will 99% likely lead to Tony’s permadeath in part two.

It also makes me wonder about RDJ’s guiding hand in these films. I’m given to understand that even on movies where he’s not producer he often brings in his own script doctors to ensure he’s getting the best possible role he can get. I wonder if he and Kevin Feige had some kind of offer-you-can’t-refuse meeting once it became evident that the franchise was going to really come together as a single, if heavily branching, narrative. It also makes me wonder how much of the “RDJ is the Godfather of the Marvel Universe” we’ve seen in recent media is a talking point the actors were given in their press-interview briefing packets.

11. Okay in the credits at one point it says “Character from Arrested Development courtesy of 20th Century Fox.” What....is up with that? What character? I don’t watch the show.

12. SUPER EXCITED FOR CAROL DANVERS IN A GENERAL SENSE AND ALSO SEVERAL SPECIFIC SENSES.

So those are my thoughts. Go ye and engage with them, I guess. :D

Did you enjoy this review or find it insightful? Consider buying me a buttery tub of popcorn at my Ko-Fi or via my Paypal!

#spoilers #infinity war #iw #infinity war spoilers #infinity war review #movie review

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tmy-dlq · 3 years ago

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Module 2: Synthesis & Reflection

The word ‘bias’ often pertains to what you lean towards, but biases can be blind spots1 too. Upon reflecting, I observed that a lot of the values I listed had to do with my public image and what people think of me. This revealed a part of me that I’ve never noticed before.

I first assessed if projecting my current personality makes me unhappy. Am I pretending to be someone else just to be accepted? It was said that you can get “sick” when you’re not being true to yourself2. Funnily, most of the times I felt most vulnerable and low happened in a season when I tried so hard to be liked3. The moments themselves weren’t so bad, but it was the embarrassment and the feeling that people thought I sucked that ate me up.

This revealed what I truly desire: validation, especially from my peers4. It scares me to think that maybe I don’t actually want to help others, I just want to be perceived as someone who is helpful. While it hurts, I believe that it’s important to be aware5 so that I can change for the better. It’s interesting that I got a 10 in Prudence6. It reminded me of how one of my friends told me I say sorry too much—I worry way too much about what other people think that I end up over-tempering what I say, to the point that I hinder my true thoughts.

Because I am so concerned about my image, I also tend to be defensive, which makes me unteachable and feel like everyone’s undermining me. In reality, they just want to help. In order to change, I need to continually reflect on my actions and even my thoughts. I recognize that I need to live with the uncomfortable truth for a bit and not rush to defend myself7.

My habit of people-pleasing has hindered me from doing things I’d actually enjoy8, just because I fear people’s judgments. I think of how this pandemic, I got into anime. I never would’ve tried it out just because I thought it was ‘uncool’. After getting over that, it’s one of the things I enjoy most today.

To desire wanting to be liked by others is not evil. It only becomes such when it’s my sole motive, and I am projecting a false image of myself for approval’s sake. As with all desires, my search for validation9 should be based on Christ’s values10. As a college senior, I believe that it is vital for me to realize all this as I discern what I want to do for the rest of my life. I don’t want to pick a career just because I think it would bring me the most honor and accolades; I want one that I’d genuinely love and that God has equipped me for. Through prayer, I can have my desires dialogue with God’s11, and eventually find what I want to do for the rest of my life.

——————————

Here’s a link to my reflective Jamboard for a closer look.

1Bernard Lonergan, Insight: A Study of Human Understanding (Toronto: University of Toronto Press, 1997).

2John Neafsey, A Sacred Voice is Calling: Personal Vocation and Social Conscience (New York, USA: Orbis Books, 2006), 112.

3The top moment was when I had a hosting gig for an org back in 2019. I tried so hard to be funny but ended up overthinking it, making my gig a total failure. It wasn’t impostor syndrome either, I actually got (gentle) feedback that it wasn’t the best. I still feel bad about it to this day, but I look back on it with much more clarity: I don’t think I’m a ‘host’ personality, if you will. I just couldn’t say no when I was offered the job because I didn’t want to disappoint the org. If you ask me to host today though, I’d probably say yes – I now know that I shouldn’t adjust my comedy to fit other people. If anything, you’re funniest when you don’t try.

4 On this note, it’s interesting to think about how my reflection in the previous module was so people-centric. I really attribute big phases of my life to where I’m surrounded by others. This isn’t a bad thing; if anything it shows how relational I am, which I believe is a great thing! I just need to find a balance, and realize and really believe that people’s affirmations aren’t all there is to life. I need to be more secure and confident in myself, even when there isn’t anyone else telling me that I’m great or whatever. I want to be my own #1 fan, who draws strength from God, and not from others’ praises.

5 Margaret Silf, Close to the Heart: A Guide to Personal Prayer (Chicago, USA: Loyola Press, 1999), 34.

6 From the 6 Virtues and 24 Character Strengths Test

7 Elliot Aronson and Carol Tavris, “The Role of Cognitive Dissonance in the Pandemic,” July 12, 2020, The Atlantic, https://www.theatlantic.com/ideas/archive/2020/07/role-cognitive-dissonance-pandemic/614074/ (accessed September 25, 2021).

8 I used anime as an example because it’s the biggest “OMG” moment for me this pandemic. Back in high school, I have to admit that I judged people who liked animes. I was really so against it because I found it so weird and corny, but now I watch it almost on the daily! Besides this, I think of how many opportunities I’ve passed up just because I didn’t want to change my “image” or my “branding”. These are very futile in the grander scheme of things. Especially in the pandemic, I found myself wishing I had gone out of my box more when I had the chance. They don’t even need to be anything grand, I just wish that I stepped out of the box more than I did. Maybe I would’ve discovered a new talent or two along the way.

9 Beyond earthly desires, I believe that as a Christian, it is also my duty to recognize and be secure in the fact that I am already valid and accepted in Christ. In all honesty, it’s incredibly difficult for me to grasp. It’s hard to live in a time where social media amplifies all praises and diminishes whatever good you feel about yourself. I am trying to work on this though, and really standing firm on the fact that I am loved just as I am. As one of my favorite songs goes, “It doesn’t take a trophy to make You proud, I’ll never be more loved than I am right now”. (Jireh - Elevation Worship & Maverick City).

10 William C. Spohn, Go and Do Likewise: Jesus and Ethics (New York, USA: Continuum, 1999), 153-154.

11 Stephanie Puen, “Taking A Look At Ourselves: Desires, Biases, and Suffering” (DLQ 10, Canvas, September 26, 2021).

References

Aronson, Elliot and Tavris, Carol. “The Role of Cognitive Dissonance in the Pandemic.” July 12, 2020. The Atlantic. https://www.theatlantic.com/ideas/archive/2020/07/role-cognitive-dissonance-pandemic/614074/ (accessed September 25, 2021).

Lonergan, Bernard. Insight: A Study of Human Understanding. Toronto: University of Toronto Press, 1997.

Neafsey, John. A Sacred Voice is Calling: Personal Vocation and Social Conscience. New York, USA: Orbis Books, 2006.

Puen, Stephanie. “Taking A Look At Ourselves: Desires, Biases, and Suffering.” September 26, 2021. Canvas. https://ateneo.instructure.com/courses/13775/discussion_topics/397383?module_item_id=729777 (accessed September 30, 2021).

Silf, Margaret. Close to the Heart: A Guide to Personal Prayer. Chicago, USA: Loyola Press, 1999.

Spohn, William C. Go and Do Likewise: Jesus and Ethics. New York, USA: Continuum, 1999.

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uniquejennyessays · 7 years ago

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Greek Myth In Contemporary Society

For years I have been liking Rick Riordan (Rick)’s works, it seemed like I have not written a review on it yet. So, here’s one on my favorite book series of all time.

HOW AND WHEN DID I START ON THIS SERIES?

It all started during my first year of high school, when I had a fixation on Greek Mythology. I admired the humanized personality of different gods, the adventures of heroes with their tragic end, and the inconsistent romance (either a happy or a miserable end). The passion led me to discover the first series of the Chronicles, Percy Jackson and the Olympians (PJO). I think I borrowed the first two books from the school library and bought the rest from the bookstore. I pretty much spend most of my time reading these novels forth and back.

Then it came the Heroes of Olympus (HOO) series, which Rick introduced Roman Mythology. With a set of new characters and old friends, I was even more absorbed into the series throughout my high-school years. I waited anxiously whenever a new installment was published, and was really content when I got to know the continuation of their adventure (which the author is a troll for cliffhangers, just like how they do for Attack on Titan Season 2). The Blood of Olympus (BOO) was published during my fourth year, which the moment I read it I had a mixed feeling of joy and sorrow. The ending was extremely shocking, from Leo’s plotted death to his revival (He’s the Percy Jackson’s Jesus), I nearly wanted to punch the author. But then, Rick created many mysteries inside the book itself. For example, Apollo’s punishment, the prophecy Ella recited, Nico and Will’s relationship, and Leo and Calypso’s whereabouts. These unexplained mysteries just made me go ‘What the hell’ at the end of the book. There were conspiracies that Rick would make a new series, with all these hints. Yet I fulfill all my needs through fanfictions, seeing what people predicted the future ‘book’ will happened.

Good news rained down on me in my last year of high school. During his tour for Magnus Chase series in 2015, he announced his new Greek Myth series, Trials of Apollo (TOA). The Hidden Oracle (THO) came out when I was studying my A-Levels, I went to the bookstore on the day when it was published. Since shipping required an amount of time, I was informed that the book will arrived one week later. Eventually, I waited patiently, and finally I received it. The book was still amazing as ever, with a God as the narrator and the main character. The other main character, the daughter of Demeter (which I predicted accurately) who can perform badass sword-fighting at the age of 12, sometime out of the ordinary Demeter child people would imagine.

During my A-Levels period, my taste has turned to Victorian classics. Besides, I have started on anime. Thus, my need for the series had lessen. Even I bought the Dark Prophecy (TDP) months ago, I managed to finish it. However, this does not stop me from loving the author’s style of writing and sense of humor.

(Additional note: I have finished TDP on Percy’s birthday.)

(picture of the troll)

WHAT IT’S ALL ABOUT?

After pouring all my love for the chronicles, so what are the series all about? Americanized Greek Mythology in the modern world. These demigods live in training camp named Camp Half-Blood (another word for demigod) during summer or for the entire year so they can prepare themselves for the dangerous outside world full of monsters. Since it has 3 different plots for each series, I need to introduce them in detail separately.

Percy Jackson and the Olympians (2005-2009)

The gateway to the demigod universe. It started off with the Lightning Thief (TLT), through first-point of view of our beloved hero, Percy Jackson. He discovers himself as the remaining demigod son of Poseidon, the Greek god of sea. Due to a great prophecy predicted one of the Big Three (Zeus, Poseidon and Hades) children will bring to the fall of Olympus, his presence was a threat to the Gods. He was also set to vanquish Kronos, King of Titans who is under the aid of another demigod, Luke Castellan.

The five books of the series described his journey to be a living legend, with an amount of betrayals, deaths of his trusted partners, slight romance and awesome fighting scenes. His humorous jokes and comments presented Rick’s unique style of writing, giving the readers memorable images.

The final book, The Last Olympian (TLOl), is the greatest among them all. brings up another prophecy which is the key to the next installment. No matter how much Luke is a villain, his devastating childhood stories and his anger towards the Greek Gods made the readers understand his resentment and yearning for a familiar love. Besides, it also revealed another prophecy, which is the key to the next series.

Heroes of Olympus (2010-2014)

The sequel of the previous series, narrating seven demigods on a quest to defeat an ancient deity in the ancient grounds of Greece and Rome. They meet challenges from the worst monsters, mortals and deities, sailing to stop the wrath of Gaea, the Earth goddess.

This series, is my favorite series among the three. It does not focus on a main character, or written in 1st person point of view. Instead, we got a third person omniscient from 9 different people, who are the seven main demigods (with Nico and Reyna in the last book). We do not get our beloved son of Poseidon in the first book, but we were given a new set of characters with different background. We also discover the Roman Version of Camp Half -Blood, Camp Jupiter, a rigid military-like camp full of Roman demigods and their descendants. The series narrated two parallel sides of the Greco-Roman Mythology working together against a common enemy.

Unlike the previous series, this brought up many backstories of characters even more tragic than Percy’s. The narration was still amusing, yet there’s a sense of seriousness inside. There was an obvious character development when the series goes on. For example, Piper McLean, who refuses to recognize herself as the daughter of Aphrodite, later accepts her identity and able to use her own inherited powers. Frank Zhang, an insecure demigod with a bad reputation, turned into a confident Roman praetor.

The thing I would like to complain about is the final fight scene in BOO. It was a few pages long with Piper, Jason and Leo putting Gaea back to her slumber. It was not as majestic as people expected it would be. It could be as fantastic as TLOl!

Trials of Apollo (2016-?)

The latest sequel for the previous series, which feature the sun god Apollo as a powerless mortal, finding his way to gain back immortality. Rick had converted back to the first-person point of view style, with the sun god as the narrator. His choice of narrator gives us an insight to a deity’s mind and opinions, how he sees the world compared to how mortals, having an ephemeral life, perception on their life. It’s a philosophical matter which discuss about life and death, and living an eternal life.

In THO, readers could see the improvement on Apollo’s personality. From the arrogant and narcissistic god who cannot accept on his ‘ugly’ condition, finally learns how to be humble and trying to see the world as how mortals would. We also witness the psychological abuse of Nero on Meg McCaffery. Letting her believe her abuser is another person from her adoptive father, but what she does not know Nero and the ‘Beast’ are the same person.

The second book, TDP, probably is my least favorite of the series. There was not much Leo-Calypso endearing moments that I expected it should be. The first half of the book narrating Apollo doing various pet tasks, and remembering his ex-lover, Emperor Commodus. However, I am pleased that Rick put a lesbian couple in the story, which I had no idea that even same-sex relationship is prohibited as well for the Huntress of Artemis. There are old friends from the previous books, which I am delighted to see again.

The third book, The Burning Maze (TBM) will be released next year.

Companion books

As much as the companion books are light and consisted with short stories, I explored the little things that were never mentioned in the main series. Besides fillers, there were information on the demigod world, giving readers a clearer sight of the Greek Mythology and Percy’s world.

The Demigod Files (TDF), narrates how Percy assisted Clarisse on her Ares rite of passage; the discover of the bronze dragon (which later Leo named him Festus); and the children of the Big Three Gods finding the newly forged weapon of Hades (Gods do like causing unnecessary trouble and giving quests to their half-blood offspring).

The Demigod Diaries (TDD), explains the adventure of Luke and Thalia in a trapped mansion, finding Annabeth on their way; the task given by Hermes during Percy-Annabeth’s one-month anniversary date; Leo and his friends’ encounter with the drunken followers of Dionysus; and an extra story written by Rick’s son, with impressive writing style for someone diagnosed with dyslexic and ADHD.

Camp Half-Blood confidential (CHBC) is a collaborated guide ‘made’ by the campers, due to the horrible orientation film directed by Apollo. Poor Nico is the only one who suffered from the film and accidentally humiliates himself in public.

Percy Jackson’s guide to Greek Gods and Greek Heroes are separate two books as a guide introducing to Greek Gods and Heroes. People could actually score Greek Mythology with these two non-boring lecture books.

Rick also made a crossover on Percy and his Egyptian Mythology counterpart, Carter Kane. They work together to defeat Setne, an Egyptian magician who thirst for divine powers. It was like an official crossover fanfiction.

Diverse Demigods with Dazzling Characteristics

I love the characters in the series, they were just full of animation and so on. I’ll state my top 10 favorites and that one character I truly despise.

First come with my favorite characters of the series:

(art by viria, she makes the old official arts belongs to the pit of Tartarus)

10. Frank Zhang

One of the cinnamon roll of the series, and the tamest among Mars/Ares children. I’m glad that Rick put a Chinese demigod in it. His Chinese name, Fai Zhang, probably based on Zhang Fei from the Romance of Three Kingdom. He is the only demigod who can read and write normally. He has shape-shifting abilities, inherited from his ancestors, is adapted from the Monkey King from Journey to the West. Like the Greek hero Meleager, his life is depended on a wooden stick, showing his pyrophobia.

Frank started off as shy with low self-esteem. He was raised by his military mother and his strict grandmother who told him various tales of their ancestors. His mother died in a war, giving him a start to train himself as a Roman demigod. In the Son of Neptune (SON), we first see him doing tasks that are undesired by the other campers. He is officially welcomed into the centurion of the fifth cohort, after he was claimed as the son of Mars. His first quest to Alaska causes him slowly gathers courage and discovers his family power. The funniest makeover he has was in the House of Hades (HOH), when Triptomelus rewards him with a buffer and taller figure, saying goodbye to his chubby self. Finally, he is upgraded to praetor.

The dynamic between Leo and Frank plays a vital role. Frank, who is initially afraid of Leo because of his fire power while the latter keeps making fun of him. We can see in the Mark of Athena (MOA), his act of jealousy towards Leo due to his similarities with ‘Sammy Valdez’, Hazel’s first love. As the series continues, Leo gives him a fireproof cloth for him to keep the wood, as a baby step for Frank to give him trust.

I heard that he will be in the subsequent book, as the Dark Prophecy stated him as the ‘changeling lord’. I might see him as a mature praetor on duty alongside with Reyna.

9. Hazel Levesque

Another cinnamon roll in the series. Despite being a daughter of Pluto/Hades, she is the less miserable version of Nico. Originally, she is known to have the abilities of controlling metal and valuables. Her magical abilities in controlling the mist is known in HOH, becoming another useful weapon. Like any child of Hades/Pluto children in the series, Hazel was from the pre-20th century. Her mother, Marie was hungry for wealth, causing her daughter having a cursed ability of attracting metals. Despite Hazel resented her greedy mother, she saved her from raising Gaea. Her heroic deed gave her a token to Elysium, yet she gave up her position to refrain her mother suffer from eternal punishment. As the child of death, she wandered around Asphodel for decades. Until her Greek half-brother discovered her and brought her back to life, giving her another chance to live again, in the 21th century.

In SON, it is revealed that Hazel’s half-brother is Nico. Originally, he wanted to bring his biological sister, Bianca back to life, seeing that the Doors of Death was opened. It was hinted Bianca had chosen a new reincarnated life than staying in the Underworld. Eventually, he learnt about Hazel’s presence and decided to take her back instead. Initially, we thought Hazel as a replacement for Bianca, judging Nico as a selfish person. Slowly, he shows brotherly affection for her in HOH by kissing her forehead, something he would not simply do. In BOO, he accepts Hazel’s relationship with Frank and teases them. He even comforts Hazel when she cries for Leo. It’s a coincidence that their mother almost shared the same name.

As she lived in an era where colored-race were low-key discriminated, with her unusual ability, she was a target of bullying. Her only comfort among these mishaps was Sammy Valdez, who sees her as a diamond. As Leo shares the same looks and last name as Sammy, believing as his reincarnation, she has slight romantic fondness for him. Later, they discover Sammy is Leo’s Great Grandfather. She finally settles down with Frank, treating Leo as her friend.

Her curse, which will be washed away by a descendent of Poseidon/Neptune, which readers are not sure if it is Percy or Frank. Besides, she probably learns some interesting 21th century stuff she had never seen before. Hopefully she does not craze for fidget spinners (those things are just all over the place!).

8. Annabeth Chase

The Brainiac of the group. Our favorite Wise Girl who is Percy’s love interest and strategist. The architect of Olympus. Someone you would choose as your girlfriend. After meeting her, you will change your views on blonde hair people.

No matter how beautiful and smart she is, she has her own fears and flaws. She has Arachnophobia, based on the feud her mother and Arachne had. In MOA, she faces her greatest fear, mother of spiders Arachne. With her clever trick, she easily defeats Arachne, possibly the first Athena demigod to do so. In SOM, she reveals her fatal flaw is hubris, believing her intelligence and power are beyond the Gods.

She ran away from home at 7, believing that her father and stepmother had disliked her part god status. On her way, she met Luke and Thalia, who presented her one of her signature weapon, the Celestial Bronze dagger. They were like a parental figure to her, and the first demigods she encountered. In the beginning of TLT, Percy figures Annabeth develops a crush on Luke, who turns out to be a backstabbing traitor and a threat to Camp Half-Blood and Olympus. Her feelings towards Luke varies in the PJO series, we see compassion, sympathy, love, respect, hatred, and regrets. In TLOl, she settles with having a sibling love towards Luke, choosing Percy over him.

The Percy-Annabeth relationship is one of my favorite hetero fictional couple. They treat each other as equal, rather than having Annabeth as his personal sidekick. With her, as the intelligent girlfriend; and him, as the brave puppy-dog boyfriend. We surely remember the first thing she tells Percy in TLT is ‘You drool when you sleep’. Even the rivalry between their parents, Annabeth still treats him as a friend, with one or two disagreements. Of course, I shipped them before they are officially together. In the Titan’s Curse (TTC), we get hints on Percy starting to fancy Annabeth, with Aphrodite’s appearance and her teasing. Next, there was the infamous kiss scene in The Battle of Labyrinth (TBOL), confirming the start of Percy’s romance journey, which becomes true in TLOl (that underwater kiss is so romantic!). After dating for months, Percy is swapped place by Hera/Juno, without any previous memories except for Annabeth. In MOA, she gives him a judo-flip (I laughed at that scene for hours) and spend a night with him in the Argo II stables (Frank does not deserve to see this ‘intimate’ moment).

Besides, do you know that she has a Norse Demigod cousin? Check out Rick’s Norse Myth series to find out.

7. Luke Castellan

You would probably ask why I place him as Number 7, for someone like him as a traitor who almost destroy Olympus and the host for Kronos. He is the anti-hero in the first series, but I like the fact that Rick created someone like him.

Luke is not an entirely a bad person. Normally, he can pass as a protective older brother, a swordsman mentor, or that mischievous and charming friend you want to hang out with. His ambitions to destroy Olympus and feeling of resentment the gods, due to the injustice of the Olympians to their demigod offspring, makes him an antagonist in PJO. He is one of the demigods who can see the flaw of the lawful system, the one who questions the authorities.

Luke constantly seeks for familiar love which his parents failed to give him, with him living with an insane mother and an absent godly father. After he ran away, he was paired with Thalia and Annabeth, giving him a new meaning of family. However, Thalia’s death added as a fuel of his bitterness. His became the head of the Hermes Cabin, leading his half-siblings, but his anger had not fully stopped, with Kronos’s constant impure motivation. He also feels compassion towards minor godly children who have no place in Camp Half-Blood, which most of them serves him during the Titan War.

For most horrible deeds he has made in the PJO series, he finally died as a hero, oppressing Kronos who possessed him. Inspired from his wish, Percy refuses his eternal life by demanding fair treatment for every demigod child.

I ship him with Thalia, which they share a few romantic tensions in a short story in TDD. He is the reason why Thalia declined her offer as a hunter in the first place, and also the reason why Thalia settles down as the lieutenant of Artemis in TTC.

6. The Grace siblings (Thalia and Jason Grace)

It’s a tie. Yes. I could not separate them like how Juno/Hera does. The Grace siblings are the improvised version of their father. We see their father as a womanizing, dramatic and disloyal King of Gods. They showed his best qualities, like leadership. The siblings are very loyal to their partners and masters, like Thalia to Luke and Annabeth in the beginning and Artemis in TTC. Jason, a loyal and supportive friend to his Argo mates and his girlfriend (He did admire Reyna before, but thanks to certain goddess).

Thalia Grace is that cool-looking sister in punk. Her name is from Thalia, one of the Muses. The irony is that she has a great fear of heights, but she can control lightning. Like Percy, Thalia was destined to be the child in the prophecy. She fought the monsters sent by Hades to her death, protecting Luke and Annabeth. Then, she is reborn in the Sea of Monsters. Luckily in TTC, she joined the Huntress. She also been through a rough childhood, with taking care of her baby brother and her irresponsible mother, then with the disappearance of Jason. She had to take the role that her parents failed to perform, yet the Gods accused of her existence before Percy showed up. It’s pretty much Zeus/Jupiter’s fault for not stick with the oath. Not once, but twice! Worst of all, he named his son Jason, like the mortal hero, so he can make his wife happy! Best Dad award for him!

Her brother, Jason, with blonde hair and blue eyes, the typical American boy. The ‘perfect’ boy with duties and leadership, he could live a perfect Roman demigod life in Camp Jupiter. Then, Hera/Juno interfere again. From the Lost Hero (TLH) to BOO, we can see a few changes of him. The rule-following golden boy to a slightly laid-back person with nerd glasses. Most fans expected Percy and Jason had a death-match against each other in MOA, with Percy replaces his position as the praetor in SON and Jason, the legendary son of Jupiter. Unexpectedly, they become best buddies on first sight and gang up against Octavian (We also got that one scene with them fighting while being possessed by eidolons). He also has the most passed out scene in MOA (hence the birth of Brick x Jason). His sympathetic character cares for Nico when he is forced spit out his crush on Percy (who does not have a crush on him, I mean, it’s obvious to fall in love with the greatest hero). He does not question or having a prejudice on the boy’s sexuality. At the end of BOO, him and Piper sit on the roof, remembering his ‘dead’ friend Leo.

These polar-opposite blood-siblings are a unique element of the series. I would like to see more of their interactions, or Thalia spilling out more embarrassing stories of Jason.

5. Leonidas ‘Leo’ Valdez

I called him the second Percy Jackson, with that same level of humor and that friendly attitude. He has a pair of magical hands that can create things and repair broken stuff. In TLH, he modified a simple paper into a small flying helicopter. Leo was partly raised by Hera/Juno, who makes him do dangerous tasks in his childhood (This woman is nuts!). When he was eight years old, Gaea made him believe he caused a fire that kills his mother in her workshop, leaving a scar in his heart.

Leo probably knows himself as the third-wheel, constantly the one being left out. There was a period of time he is jealous of Jason’s charisma and excellent leading abilities, while he is a low-profile mechanic, with no one cares about him. Otherwise, he is a good friend to people who are nice to him. In BOO, Nike/Victoria predicts either Frank, Hazel, Percy or Leo will die in the war. Leo, helping the idea of getting the Physician’s Cure while secretly plotting his own death and his chance of survival.

This guy has a tough time catching the girls’ attention, he keeps falling for the wrong person. In the beginning, he has the hots for Khione, the cold snow goddess who side with the Titans. Next, he falls for Jason’s sister Thalia, who tries her best ignoring him. He has a small chemistry with Echo, a camouflaging nymph who is cursed to repeat people’s sentences (I feel hurtful when Echo disappears). Hazel mistakes him as her first crush Sammy, who happens to be his great-grandfather. Finally in HOH, the Titaness Calypso despise his sudden appearance on her island, later they find themselves being attracted to each other. He is also the first hero who can return to Ogygia and claim Calypso as his girlfriend, and the first demigod known dating an ancient being.

I need more interaction of Percy and Leo, which was rare in HOO. I expected them to be joking buddies, but in MOA Percy yells at Leo for setting New Rome on fire, not a good start for best friends. Leo also dislike Percy for abandoning Calypso behind, which turned out to be a misunderstanding. I finally get a scene of them making Nike and Adidas joke they made in BOO.

By the way, Team Leo for the win.

4. Piper McLean

I do not get why people would dislike someone like her. There are several fans disliking her characteristics, including an ex-classmate of mine. They think her as the most useless and bland character. I love Rick’s arrangement of her characteristics! What is the point of making her the main character if she does not contribute anything? I mean, she singlehandedly defeats Khione and the Boreads in HOH. When Khione degrades her, she confidently argues with her, proving her strengths.

People stereotyped daughter of Aphrodite as living Barbie dolls, who do nothing but looking into their reflections and gossiping. Sometimes, they either pair people up or break others’ hearts. She breaks that idealistic view as a tomboyish girl who cares less of her look or fashion. She is one of the boldest Aphrodite child who fights for people she loves (the other one is Silena). She is very down-to-Earth about her father’s job as a Hollywood actor, until she is cornered by others. She is also the first person who dauntlessly challenges the cabin leader and oppose the Aphrodite’s rite of passage of breaking other’s heart. Piper is not a dumb-beauty, she already has an abundance of knowledge on Greek Myth and Cheeroke legends which play extremely useful information to other.

That ex-classmate told me Piper is possessive towards Jason. For me, it is very normal for her to be possessive to her ‘boyfriend’, or someone whom she loves, as long as it’s not Yuno Gasai level (see Future Diary for references). Besides, Jason is not the only one she cares about. There is Leo, and her father who is captured by the Giants. There are people dislike her because in MOA, she thinks Percy as cute, but average. Everyone has their own opinion, not everyone fancies the greatest hero on Earth. I really adore her and Percy as best friends, rather than her being another Percy’s admirer.

I would say she has the second-best character development. In TLO, she has the image of an insecure girl. Her adventure as a demigod makes her grow, mending her weaknesses. I love her chemistry with Annabeth in BOO, when fear and phobia prevent Annabeth’s logical reasoning from functioning properly, her feelings guide her to overpower them.

3. Reyna Ramiez-Arellano

Most of the major female characters are taken (except Thalia, the huntress and Rachel, the oracle), she’s the only major female demigod character in the series without a romantic partner. She made a minor appearance in the Sea of Monsters (SOM) as Circe’s apprentice, but soon

Her first appearance in SON gives a dignified and mysterious aura, we barely know her last name and such. She is fearless in battle and a wise leader. In fact, the last book reveals her fear towards ghosts, leading to her haunted childhood of physical abuse. She has moved from home to home, and settles as a praetor in New Rome. Her former sin for patricide might lose her power and trust in New Rome, thus she never speaks of it to anyone except for Nico.

I am really entertained with the fight between Orion and Reyna. Orion, being the male chauvinist, comments the greatness of male dominance. Reyna proves herself that she can perform as well as a man could do, defeats him by herself while avenging the fallen huntresses and Amazon warriors. ‘You will die at the hands of a girl’, that sentence literally gives me the chills.

She has a successful career, blessed by two divine beings, and having an excellent characteristic. One thing that she does not own is romance, just like Aphrodite/Venus tells her that she will never find romance in half-blood. There might be a chance for her having a mortal lover, or catching the eye of an immortal being.

2. Perseus ‘Percy’ Jackson

He is the key character for us to fall in love with the demigod world with Greek Gods and monsters. He was not only charming, but having a great sense of humor. The dark hair and green eyes of his makes him fall into the category of the stereotypical hot-blooded protagonist with a tragic backstory and secret powers, like Eren Jaeger from Attack On Titan, or Hyakuya Yuuichirou from Seraph of the End. The character is based on Rick’s own son, Hayley Riordan, who suffers from ADHD and dyslexic. Rick used to tell him Greek Mythology as his bedtime stories, until the child gave him the inspiration to create his world with Greek Myth as the base.

In TLT, he is shown as a troublesome child who gets kicked out of school frequently. He has an abusive stepfather, Gabe Ugliano, a nasty gambler. He does not have any friends except for Grover, who has difficulty in walking, and stands up for him. He nearly loses his mother from a Minotaur. His unfortunate past changes when he knows of his identity as a demigod. From SOM to TLO, we can see improvements in his mortal life, such as gaining a new stepfather, Paul Blofis, able to attend high school, and getting loyal friends. In TOA, it is known that he will have a baby sister.

Besides his heroic acts and his brave deeds that we all know, he is pretty goofy and sarcastic. We all know of his personality through that first-person point of view about his views on others and the description of his adventures. He is moderately smart and observant, but he can be oblivious in simple stuff around him, like his own romantic encounters. He needs years to realize he is in love with Annabeth, which most of the readers get the clue before him. Reyna confesses her feelings to him in SON, which Percy needs minutes to figure it out. In BOO, when Nico opens up to Percy, Annabeth already gets the point right ahead, leaving him still in a daze.

Percy, despite being the best demigod alive, he acts quite modest and selfless. Most Greek Heroes we all know are portrayed as prideful, arrogant, womanizer or ungrateful. Him, as the son of Poseidon who technically saves the world, he never looks down on anyone. He barely sells himself, except when it’s needed, or in a very sarcastic way. He makes friends with everyone, including non-humans. In SOM, he is a little ashamed that his half-brother is a Cyclops, in the end he accepts him as his brother. The most significant moment is in TLOl, when Zeus offers him immortality. He considers at first, but then realizes the price of it, and turning it down. Instead, he asks for minor deities’ equal rights to claim their demigod children, including Hades, who is not welcomed in Olympus. If I were him I would probably do the same thing, except I might face the wrath of the King of Gods.

**Before revealing my top favorite character, here’s some honorable mentions:

Zoe Nightshade, Bianca di Angelo, Will Solace, Charles Beckendorf, Rachel Dare, the Stolls brother, Ethan Nakamura, Grover Underwood, Tyson, Blackjack, Chiron, Silena Beauregard, Gleeson Hedge, Clarisse La Rue, Calypso

Now here comes my favorite character:

1.Nico di Angelo

I am so sorry, I must put him at number 1 because of my personal bias.

This character has the most noticeable character change and development. He is debuted in TTC, which he is portrayed as carefree 10 years old boy who loves Mythomagic and very curious about everything. The death of his sister, his only known blood relative, caused him fall into despair. Soon, he learnt about his parentage, separating himself from the other demigods.

Despite him as the serious, angry son of Hades with depressing background, he gets a few hilarious moments. He is turned into two types of plants; the Spiderman referenced quote ‘With great power…comes great need to take a nap’; his imagination of Percy joking about farturas; and his confession to Percy.

His personality is mostly seen from other demigods’ views. In TTC, Percy sees him as an annoying little brother and full of curiosity of the demigod world. He seems excited with everything he is involved in, and very eager in participation. He also shows concern for his sister Bianca, asking Percy to protect her. His twist of personality comes in when Percy brings the news of Bianca’s accidental death. In BOTL, he becomes the gloomy, antisocial, and angry child who seeks for revenge and performing necromancy. He also crowns himself as the Ghost King, which the name sounds very Chuunibyou-ish (Chuunibyou is a Japanese term for people who acts like a know-it-all adult and look down on real ones, or believe they have special powers unlike others, see the anime Love, Chuunibyou and other Delusions for more info). In TLOl, he tricks Percy into his father’s lair, which makes Percy angry. He is one of the important ally who aids Percy gaining his Styx River immortality and convincing Hades to fight the Titan army.

There are more demigods involved with his description of personality and people’s opinion of him in HOO. Hazel, seeing him as her savior and brother, showing an amount of respect and admiration. Annabeth, doubting him having a crush on her (which he does not), only sees him as a younger brother. Leo is scared of his necromantic skills, trying to avoid him as best as he could. Frank shows respect and fear to his ‘brother-in-law’, but unexpectedly sharing the same interest in Mythomagic. Jason, originally suggests abandoning him to the Titans while proceeding their main task in MOA, receiving many objections from the other crew members. In HOH, Jason has a sense of sympathy to Nico when Cupid forcefully make him spill out his feelings. He approached the younger boy to befriend him. We also have Reyna, who forms a big sister instinct towards him, and also feels his pain.

We get Nico’s own point of view in BOO. We could not help but to sympathize with his old memories and feelings. We can see his unrequited feelings towards Percy, his moments with Bianca, his hatred towards the Hunters, his intense feelings with his father and the most importantly, his concern towards other demigods. He is not entirely a cold-hearted, unemphatic person like others believed him to be. The way he describes Will, it definitely sounds like a typical boy meets boy fanfiction. Using comparison to other demigods like Jason and Octavian, he has a sense of fondness to the child of Apollo. The Percy-Nico-Will mirrors the Luke-Annabeth-Percy relationship. Both Luke and Percy are the heroic figure to Annabeth and Nico, they are years older than them (technically Nico is older), and they the first demigod they encounter. Annabeth had a love-hate relationship with Luke due to his betrayal; while Nico hates him for breaking their promise and admires him at the same time. Annabeth bickers with Percy like how Nico argues with Will, and they are opposite attractions. In the end of the series, Annabeth tells Luke she sees him as a brother and starts to date Percy in PJO; Nico confesses his past crush towards Percy and sets his eyes on Will, which they end up dating.

I am glad that Riordan arranged Will as his boyfriend. There is a slight change of his personality after they are dating. For example, in CHBC, him and Percy team up and tease Annabeth. In THO, he becomes more participating in camp activities, and willing to socialize with other campers. Plus, he gives an excuse for himself to sit with his boyfriend in the Apollo table. Nice job kid! The loophole of two demigods of the opposite sex cannot stay alone in a cabin gives them a nice chance to spend nights in Hades Cabin, doing stuff.

The character I despised the most, is none than other:

Octavian

He is purely whiny and annoying, like a fly. I knew he was up to no good when I first know this person. I do not care if he is the descendant of my favorite god (Apollo), this puny auger is terrible. In SON, he reminds Percy as Luke Castellan. In BOO, Nico describes him as a watered-down, unhealthy version of Will Solace. Leo also states he has a girly screaming voice. These descriptions give reader an image of an undesired person, also adding humor in the series.

Octavian is extremely xenophobic. He immediately dislikes Percy, insulting him as graecus scum. He does not show any sign of welcoming to the arrival of the representatives of the Greek camp. Ironically, he fears for Nico, who is a powerful Greek demigod. He discriminates Rachel Dare, Apollo’s chosen oracle, believing she is a fraud who practice sorcery.

His sadistic and prideful side is portrayed in many scenes. For example, he rips off stuffed animals as an offering to the gods. He hopes Percy feel the pain of getting his new SPQR tattoo. When he is in charge as Pontifex, he picks people who are brutal like Bryce Lawrence and strong like Mike Kahle. He casually tells people that his family is wealthy in New Rome and he is a descendent of Augustus.

In the end, his own pride and lust for fame and power blinds him, giving him a death sentence. His death is graphic and funny. He might receive eternal punishment in the Underworld. My favorite scene of him is when Piper, Jason and Percy tells him to shut his mouth in MOA.

(I almost forgot Gabe Ugliano, who happens to be the worst parent and husband in the fictional world. This man is gone for good!)

Groovy Gods of Olympus

The Greek Gods in Percy Jackson’s world rules the world, which all of them have humanistic personalities. Greek Gods mirrors human’s behavior with their vice and virtues, like Hera’s jealousy, Hephaestus’ diligence, Zeus and Aphrodite’s lust, Hestia and Artemis’s chastity, Zeus and Ares’s wrath, Hestia’s kindness and Dionysus’s sloth. They moved their base from empires to empires, until they found their spot in United States, the world’s superpower nation. Olympus is based on the top floor of the Empire state building, while the entrance to the Underworld is in Los Angeles. These settings probably make us never see those things the same way again. The gods, adapted to the 21st century lifestyle, with their area of power matches the modern professions.

Rick still sticks to the original description of the gods, with Athena’s greyish eyes of wisdom, Aphrodite’s changing beauty (depends on different people), Ares’ ruthless behavior, Apollo’s flashy and handsome looks and Hephaestus’s unappealing image. Not all the gods are divine as they should look. Dionysus/Mr. D in PJO series acts as a sluggish camp director. He is banished to Camp Half-Blood due to his flirtatious manners on an off-limit nymph. He does not contribute much to the camp, except for having naps or playing poker with Chiron and a few satyrs. Apollo, the prideful and narcissistic sun god, turns into a mortal by his father in TOA series. He has lost his former glory and powers, leaving him a mortal identity and body to live on Earth. Hestia, the former Olympian in the appearance of a young girl, is easily neglected due to her status.

I would admit that Greek Gods does not make excellent parents. Zeus forbids the gods from visiting their mortal children, except in a few occasions (he is also the douche who broke the oath twice and have 2 demigod children, and he passes most of the blame to Poseidon). Hera, expecting an ideal family, abandons her child Hephaestus because of his ugly appearance. In TLOl, Hades openly declares he prefers Bianca over Nico. However, some gods do care of their children. Poseidon in the series acts as a caring father to Percy (we barely see his angry side like in the myth). Hermes, who has multiple jobs, and countless children, he cares deeply for them. He even kisses Luke on the forehead before the Fates carry his body away. In BOO, it is revealed that Hades has a deep affection for his children, which most of them do not have a happy life. The antisocial and awkward god has difficulties in showing fondness, thus he provides his children gifts (Pluto gave Hazel colored pencils on her 13th birthday while Nico gets a French zombie chauffer).

Usually, gods conceive children like normal human beings. In BOTL, children of Athena are born in a unique way. I was curious at Annabeth and the other Athena’s children birth since their mother is a virgin goddess. There was a story in Greek Myth which she and Hephaestus had a child sprang from her handkerchief (of course they do not have any intimacy). It is told that children of Athena are born from the mind and pure love, not through intimate love and pregnancy. In THO, the daughter of Apollo Kayla Knowles has two fathers. I had to stop and reread that part, and it is true. I still do not get how demigod children are born from same-sex parents. Subjugate mothers? Or maybe like Athena children, sprang out from something. (I need to stop thinking about this or else the complexity will burn my brain cells).

Controversies

There’s a few controversies I have heard around.

Similarities of Percy Jackson and Harry Potter

This one was all over the place. People keep comparing Percy Jackson to Harry Potter. Some complaint that Rick copied the characters Rowling owned. These are the examples people brought up.

1.Percy has green eyes and black hair, living with an abusive parent. He does not know of his parentage. Harry, who has green eyes and black hair, living with abusive relatives.

2.Annabeth plays the smart one in the first trio. She is constantly compared to Hermione, the brightest witch in the Wizarding World.

3.Grover is the timid person of the trio, and the first supporter and companion to the main character. Another character in Harry Potter with the similar personality, Ron Weasley.

4.Chiron, the knowledgeable and caring mentor in the series, like Dumbledore in Harry Potter.

5. Luke, blond hair, the anti-hero. Draco, the anti-hero to Harry.

6. The mischievous Stolls brother, who keeps pranking on people. The Weasley twins, pranksters duo of Hogwarts.

7. Camp Half-Blood that is invisible to mortal’s eye, a haven for Greek demigods to learn defensive skills. Hogwarts, unknown to muggles and where young witches and wizards lean magic.

Maybe the author was not stable with the characterization in the first place, he might get references from the series itself. However, Rick has not confirmed that his characters are based on the Harry Potter series. The characterization became better later.

To be frank, I prefer Percy Jackson than Harry Potter. I love the diversity shown in the book, with good humor in it. Otherwise, Harry Potter gets the best language form.

The Percy Jackson movies

Movie adaptations are barely good, this is one of the examples. Even Rick himself acknowledge that the movie is horrible. I watched both movies, the plotline itself is good, but it cannot satisfy us fans.

The producers casted young adult actors for the roles than 12 years old. They could actually make the actors grow up with the movie, just how they did for Harry Potter. I’m alright with the Percy Jackson actor, I have no prejudice over Movie Grover’s race, Luke’s actor is fine (where’s the scar). I just have problems with the casting on female characters. Firstly, Annabeth Chase. In the first movie, she’s a brunette with blue eyes. I legit thought that’s a random daughter of Aphrodite. Where is the blonde hair and blue eyes? It does not mean I dislike the actress herself, it just her signature curly blonde hair with grey eyes are gone! This mistake was soon corrected in the 2nd movie. In the SOM movie, the Clarisse’s actor looked like a Victoria Secret Super Model, rather than the buff, mean-looking leader of the Ares Cabin.

There is a stark difference from the movie settings and the book settings. Instead of having cabins based on their godly parentage, each member has their own cabin. What is this? Luxury camp for the godly children? There is also no rule on camp clothing, where’s the orange camp shirt? The worst of all, why do they have advanced technologies? It is said that technologies attract monsters, which is unusable for demigods.

All of these flaws made me prefer a sophisticated anime adaptation than a real-life movie or TV-show.

LGBT+ characters

(whoever made this edit deserves a thumbs up)

This is a recent controversy after the publicize of THO. Mostly from parent readers, they complained on the god’s sexuality and Nico and Will dating. I understand that some parents don’t want their children to knowing much about human sexuality at an early age. What makes me feel mad about the people who complained about having same-sex couple or characters in the LGBT+ spectrum does not realize that homosexuality is accepted in the ancient times.

It is true that Apollo is bisexual, who has countless affairs with women and men. Other gods are not 100% straight, even Zeus fancied Ganymede. (I know, Greek Myth is one hell of a messed-up pit!)

Besides, I have nothing against Nico and Will dating (Solangelo shipper here!). Rick does not use words like ‘gay’, ‘queer’, ‘homosexual’ to identify their sexualities, which he does not want to label them as a specific identity. In Ancient Greco-Roman, same-sex relationship is highly encouraged in the army to strength the bonds between teammates. Also, as someone in the LGBT+ spectrum, I appreciate Rick’s decision to take the risk and promoting diversity. One thing I am mad about him is the vagueness of Nico and Will relationship. There are so many gaps in between BOO and THO which there’s no description on when they started dating, who confessed first and how do they get together! I need to know more about their relationship! I will be glad if there’s a side story of them. Also, Kayla’s mysterious birth from same-sex parents.

I love the fact that Rick does not give a dam (I simply just put a pun here) about the people who complained. He straight on inserted a kick-ass elderly lesbian couple in TDP.

How the series made an impact on me? My hopes on the franchise.

It is one of the reason why I took the path of writing. The story, and the writing-style had inspired me to be a writer myself. Looking at the vivid image of modernized Greek Gods brought some magic into my dull high-school life. I would also like to cosplay those female demigods in the future. As an anime fan, I hope this series can be created into an anime series, just like how they did for the Powerpuff Girls back then. I also hope I can meet more PJO/HOO fans in my country.

Jenny (14-21 Aug 2017)

Author’s Note: My first essay describing on a fictional work I like. I tried to avoid any grammatical mistakes and add as much vocabulary as I can in it. The one week of writing this essay gives me neck pain (from looking too much on my laptop), and a better insight to the character and the story. I took a hiatus in the PJO/HOO fandom since I started on Hetalia and other anime. The day I decided to write this fic, I realized there are so many details I have forgotten, thus I need to check the Wikia and the books for references. This is a pleasant experience for me to start on writing reviews and simple creative writing. I might write more reviews or analytical essays for other book series and anime.

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