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#took five days to find the angst but there it is!
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The Meet Cute - Law's Story - 4
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Source for pic
The Great Pretender 4
Word Count: 5946
Tags For The Whole Story: Fem!Reader; Law is a soft dom; you have bratty tendencies (not all the time); voice kink; praise kink; cursing; very suggestive behaviour and innuendo from the start; sexual tension; teasing; so much flirting; romance; slow-burn; fluff; slight angst; mature audiences (though explicit NSFW moments will be properly tagged on the chapter); possessive Law; protective Law; soft Law; teasing Law; manipulative Doflamingo; inappropriate Doflamingo; fake relationship trope; only one-bed trope; reader has some anxiety issues; reader is a control freak and perfectionist; modern day AU
Special Warning: English is not my first language, I apologise for any possible spelling or grammar mistakes.
Summary: After moving away from the hustle and bustle of Grand Line City to help your father around the property following a horse-riding accident - and in the hopes of healing your broken heart after your asshole ex-fiancé cheated - you settle into the country calmness of the Calm Belt. You and Law (your father's doctor) start to build a flirty friendship because of your father’s procedure. So much so that when he’s invited to Baby 5’s wedding (his cousin), he asks you to be his date. His uncle Doflamingo - who is filthy rich - is very adamant on finding a suitable wife for him. Seeing as he wants to avoid that, he asks you to pretend to be his girlfriend for the weekend.
Notes: Oh... chapter 4 is so much fun... My favourite so far, please enjoy! Special shout-out to @jintaka-hane for showing me a fanart of Law with the cute Bepo pen! I HAD to add it to this chapter!
Tag List: @rosidaze @beachaddict48 @armiliadawn @jintaka-hane @sprinkklz @baby5555 @hopelesslover06 @mars-mizuko @sleepykittycx @nerium-lil
Masterlist
|Chapter 3|
Law took you up on that promise for the second-best coffee in town, using the excuse that he had some free time and wanted to check on your father. It didn’t really matter that he barely took five minutes to assure your father was fine before you two talked for almost two hours over coffee about books. 
You also used your father as an excuse the same week, when you visited Law at the clinic saying that you weren’t sure about one of the pills he had to take, because it made him droopy and sleepy. You knew it didn’t matter and Law assured you his medication was fine but if he was uneasy about the side effects of that pill, he could take a different one - which he prescribed. And then he took you out to coffee - the best in town - and you talked for another hour before he had to get back. This time he shared a bit about his hobbies and you shared yours. 
Kaya had an insufferable dreamy look on her face when you went back to the clinic with Law because your car was parked there and you had forgotten to validate the parking ticket. You couldn’t help the creeping blush on your cheeks as she, Penguin and Shachi watched you both arrive at the clinic together, looking fresh out of a coffee date. 
Penguin and Shachi made smooching sounds at Law and you were pretty sure, based on Law’s pulsing jaw, that they would both be on the receiving end of his anger soon enough. Kaya, instead, decided to take all the fun out on you. “How was your date?”
“Not a date! Please, Kaya, validate the ticket. I need to get back to my dad.”
“Sure, sweetheart, sure. I’ll see you soon. I’m not sure the two of you can stay apart from each other until Monday.” Rolling your eyes to the back of your head, you tell her goodbye and turn to leave, but she doesn’t let you go easily. “I’ve never seen him this happy in years, honey!”
You don't turn back to her, but you can’t help the silliest grin ever from forming on your lips. 
About a month rolls by slowly. Your dad is perfectly fine now, though he’s still not allowed to lift heavy things; your part-time job has a fairly good chance of turning into a full-time one with more responsibilities and an increase in your salary; you haven’t thought about your dumb heartache in forever and…
Well you and Law keep having little coffee dates. The tension between both of you is becoming increasingly larger and much more charged. He was away for about a week at a medical conference, and you suffered from withdrawal. You both texted, but you didn’t want to bother him and he was pretty busy, being one of the main speakers - man’s a genius!
Kaya keeps pestering you about how perfect you both are for each other and now that you’ve met Usopp - her fiancé - he says the same. And the way he says it makes everything sound even more romantic and story-like than when Kaya does it. You’re confused about the way you feel about the doctor, but you can’t help the little jumps and pangs in your chest whenever you’re together. 
So today, as you stand in front of the mirror adjusting some of your cutest clothes, you can’t help but feel butterflies in your stomach. Law texted you saying he needs to speak with you urgently. You’re beyond curious as to what he means by that and your mind has already conjured about fifty different ideas of what it could be. Your anxiety is already building, making plan after plan about what he’s going to say, how you will respond and all the possible outcomes. About half of your thoughts end with you two making out. The others are terrible scenarios about complications with your father’s exams or the possibility that Law is moving to a different country. 
You’re not in control. And you hate it.
Sighing you grab your jacket and sunglasses and tell your dad you’re going out and don’t know when you’ll be back. You manage to ignore his smirk, but can’t ignore the ‘Tell Law I said hi!’ he sing-songs to you as you leave, though you never told Shanks who you were going to meet.  
Law told you to meet at Sanji’s, but when you arrive, he’s waiting by the door with two cups of coffee in his hands, and you realise he doesn’t want to hang around the café. Before you open your mouth, you have to swallow the hard lump that’s formed in your throat. A simple week of absence made the eyes grow fonder! You know that’s not the saying, but damn, the hot doctor looks even hotter now. He’s wearing his scrubs, but instead of the white doctor’s coat, he has a long black coat over them.
“Hi.” You whisper as he smirks at you, his eyes taking you in, making you realise you made the right choice of outfit.
“Hello, you look as gorgeous as ever.” You can’t hide the pink in your cheeks. It’s something you should’ve already grown accustomed to. Law always praises you, telling you how beautiful you look and what good taste you have. As if that weren’t enough, he pulls doors and chairs for you, he’s a gentleman. Though he doesn’t often show it, since, to almost everyone else, he’s just a moody, broody, stoic doctor. But he makes you feel special.
From your talks, you know he had etiquette lessons growing up with his uncles. Though he never cared for them, Law couldn’t help but absorb the lessons like a sponge. He told you that’s how he knows so many things. He just absorbs information, even useless stuff. 
And at least now, as he claims, he’s putting those etiquette lessons to good use, because you melt every time he treats you like you’re the only person in the world. And he seems to enjoy leaving you speechless in his presence.
“Thank you. So we’re walking?” You ask as Law hands you the coffee.
“Yes, I need to ask you something and I’d rather not be too exposed to do it.”
Oh? What does he want to ask you? You can’t help but make more silly little scenarios in your head and get overwhelmed by them, but then he softly nudges you with his shoulder.
“Relax. Let go. You don’t need to be in control all the time, we’ve been through this.” He smirks at you and you chuckle back at him. He can always read you so well. He’s teased about what he could do to make you surrender control to him. He’s never been too explicit and you were always too afraid to ask.
But you know what he means. He’s talking about intimate settings, where you can let him take charge. And you can’t deny that it’s an alluring thought, to just let go of being responsible, of always having to be in control, of constantly needing to know what happens next.
But is it a door you really want to open?
“You’re doing it again.” He states, deadpan, and you sigh.
“I can’t help it. It’s stronger than me.”
“Right, I’m aware of that.” He leads you to the park, to a more secluded bench, where you both sit down. You sip your coffee in silence, waiting for him to speak, and you’re grateful you grabbed your jacket, as the weather has turned chilly. 
He seems to be debating something in his head, opening his mouth and closing it again, perhaps unsure of how to approach the subject he wants to tell you about. 
Until he sighs and finally does it.
“Remember when I told you about my uncles?” You nod. “Well, my uncle Doffy has an adoptive daughter - Baby 5 - and she’s getting married next weekend.” He sighs and you nod. You already knew Doflamingo had a daughter and that she was beautiful - Ichiji had made sure you knew, trying to get a rise out of you while blatantly flirting with her.
“Doflamingo he… well he’s always taken a special interest in me. He made sure I went to the best schools, had the best teachers and received the best education possible. He polished me to follow in his footsteps, to take over his enterprise as an heir. I never showed any interest in it.”
Interesting. “Why not have his own daughter take over the company?” You blurted out before filtering the question through your brain. Maybe he didn’t want to share more details than he was willing to give.
“Ah, because my cousin is very fickle with her affections… she loves too hard, too fast. She’s always willing to accept any proposal from any man who dares to stare at her a moment too long. This is her third attempted marriage, actually - Doffy called off the other ones before they went through.” He chuckles, clearly understating his cousin, and you can’t help but be surprised. “So my uncle can’t risk some man telling Baby 5 she’s beautiful and getting her to sign a prenup that takes away the company.”
You nod in understanding and take another sip of coffee.
“Anyway, I never meant to take over his place and, for now, he doesn’t press the subject. He knows I want to practise medicine. Though he makes sure I know everything that happens in the company - which I do - and he keeps me on the board. Unfortunately, Doffy also thinks he has a say in who I date - or eventually marry - even going as far as setting me up on dates with ‘possible candidates’.”
“That seems a bit controlling…” You mumble.
“It is. Doffy is many things, and controlling and manipulative are some of them.” Law takes a long sip of his coffee until the crinkle between his eyebrows relaxes and disappears. It’s the second time you’ve seen him rattled beyond his mask of perfect control. And Doflamingo always seems to be behind it. “I’ve avoided bringing any girl back to his house because he can be very inconvenient. But I know that if I show up to my cousin’s wedding without a date, he’ll want to introduce me to every eligible young lady he deems fit to welcome into the family.”
Controlling seems like an understatement, then. 
“That sounds terrible, Law.”
He agrees with a nod and the crinkle is back. You feel the urge to smooth it out with your fingertips to help him relax. Or maybe by pressing your lips to it. 
You drink your coffee instead. 
“It is. That’s why I’ve been thinking and… well I’m going to bring a date to the wedding. A perfect date. Someone he can’t manipulate and someone he won’t be able to find fault with. She and I will seem so much in love that he’ll be forced to ease up on his agenda and let me be for the whole wedding weekend. Doesn’t that sound perfect?” He smirks at you, the crease disappearing when his eyes meet yours. 
You’re suddenly a bit jealous, though you really have no right to be. But who is this girl? Why is she so perfect? So much in love? Why haven’t you ever met her?
“Sure, seems perfect. Flawless plan.” You whisper, barely able to shake the frown from your lips.
“I’m glad you agree. Because you’re her.” His smirk turns into a grin as you cough and sputter coffee everywhere, barely avoiding staining your outfit.
“What do you mean?” You ask, accepting the tissue he hands you with a gruff ‘thanks’ and wiping your mouth. 
“We're friends, we get along well and… we can't deny this… tension between us.” He smirks as your cheeks warm. “I know we can pull off looking like a couple in love.”
The way your breath hitches in your throat has nothing to do with choking on your coffee, and everything to do with the implications of what he said. 
“I know we're capable of doing this. I've planned the outcome. It's flawless. The thing is…” He scratches the back of his neck, his amber gaze fixed somewhere far away. “I also know I'm being selfish. I want to do this for my reasons alone. But to do so, I'll have to drag you into this mess. I've considered the implications, and if you say yes, you'll need to be aware of some things, but…” His sigh comes from deep within, from a place he's not yet intent on showing you. “I don't want to do this with anyone else but you. And I can't miss this wedding. And I definitely can't be paraded around like a prized pig.”
A strained chuckle escapes his lips as he tousles his dark hair again. “It's a damned if I do, damned if I don't situation… what do you say?”
You've been quietly sipping the rest of your coffee, trying to ignore the tightening in your chest at his words. A fake relationship? It does sound simple. You know him well enough by now, he's right, you're friends. He's also right about the tension between you two, and you could pull off being completely enthralled by each other without much effort. You wouldn't even be faking the attraction. 
But what does he mean by the implications? Something about his family? Or the forced connection between the two of you? 
Maybe both?
“I'm considering it. I want to help you, you're my friend.”
“But?” He asks while raising an eyebrow. 
“What are the implications?”
The crinkle in the middle of his brow is back and before he even speaks, you already know it’s about his family. 
“Doffy isn’t easy to deal with. He'll be imposing, inappropriate and most likely, manipulative. He'll want to know all about you and will probably test you, push you, to see if you're really interested in me.” He lets out another one of those deep, soul-shaking sighs. “I really didn't want to drag you into this, but I can’t take another family function meeting women I don't care about and never will.”
You can handle some probing. Hell, you went through the same thing when you and Ichiji made things official. How different can Donquixote Doflamingo be from Vinsmoke Judge? Probably not too different - same cold, smug look, same indifference… probably! 
Seeing the slight distress in Law's eyes only strengthens your resolve. “I'll do it.” You give him a strained smile as he raises his eyebrows. 
“Are you sure?”
“I’d never let a friend down, Law. Besides, how bad could it really be? Free food, dancing, pretending to be your girlfriend… I can think of worse things! A girl can be spoiled sometimes.”
He chuckles at your silliness, but the tension in his brow remains. “My uncle can be a handful… he… there was…” He looks like he's about to tell you something important but quickly shakes his head. “Never mind. As long as you're sure.”
You nod, finishing your coffee, and take out your trusted notebook. “But I'm not going in blind, mister. We'll need to learn everything about each other. If we're doing this, we're going to be superstars at it!”
Finally the crease between his eyebrows softens as he watches you with a flicker of amusement, a slight easiness overpowering his usual scowl. “I knew you’d say that.”
You grumble through your teeth, too focused on trying to find a pen in the chaos that is your purse, but you must have misplaced it because there’s nothing there. “Do you have a pen?” You gesture to his pocket, seeing some sticking out.
Sighing, he reaches without looking and gives you the first thing he grabs. As the pen touches your hand, you raise your brow. What the heck? Your eyes go from the pen to Law and from Law to the pen, an amused smirk tugging at the corners of your lips. 
“What?” He asks, taking another sip of coffee.
“This is freaking adorable. I’m dying. Trafalgar Law, the moody, broody, humourless doctor has a teddy bear pen. I might need to take a photo of this.”
Law’s ears turn slightly red and he purses his lips, but he tries to look unaffected. “So what?” He reaches, trying to take it back. 
A giggle escapes your lips before he can snatch the pen from your hands. “It’s too much to handle. I never thought you would have anything like this on you!” You keep deflecting his moves so he doesn’t grab the pen and you can almost see smoke coming out of his ears.
With a low grunt and a quick move, Law grabs your chin and moves his face closer to yours, a glint of amusement and impatience in his eyes. “I like cute things, obviously.” He says as his eyes give you an appreciative once-over and you blush. “Is that a problem?” You can barely think with his face in front of yours, so you don’t say anything. He smirks, tilting your head higher. “Didn’t think so.” Then he snatches the pen from your hand with a quick gesture. “Stop being a brat.” His tone is sharp but his gaze is playful. 
When he releases you, searching his pocket for another pen, you have to swallow hard and take a deep breath before you can remember why you needed the pen in the first place. As he hands you the other pen, he watches you with an insufferably smug look. “You were making notes about what we needed to learn…”
“Right!” You exclaim, feeling your cheeks flare up and start scribbling furiously. 
He tilts his head to spy what you're writing and can't hide another smirk from overcoming his lips. “Favourite music, colour, movie, place… is this fifty questions type of thing?”
You don't stop your furious scribbling and you don't need to meet his eyes to know he's staring at you with mild amusement. “I told you I'm not going in blind. We need to cover everything. You've got work today?” He nods and you hum in disappointment. 
“Tomorrow?” He says tentatively, not knowing where you're going with this. 
“Yes. Only in the afternoon, though. Can we meet at your place?” You've been at the door of his apartment but you've never crossed the threshold. Are you being too forward? 
Heck, nah! You're going to be his girlfriend for the weekend anyway! 
“Sure. What do you have in mind?” His voice deepens as he raises his hand, placing his arm on the bench behind your shoulders, his hand caressing your hair softly as if by accident. Your pen drills a hole in the notebook and you curse and clear your throat. 
“Studying. I'll compile this list and then we're going to answer these questions and learn everything about each other.”
His smirk only deepens as he hums even lower. No matter how much time passes between you two, his voice is something that always makes you shiver. “Studying each other sounds great.” You make another hole in the notebook and he chuckles again. “You're trying to be in control of everything again.” He says deadpan. 
“I know! Let me cope, Law. It's the only way I know how to do this.”
He hums and you can almost feel the way he's trapping more words behind his tongue. He wants to say something else, but he just raises his arms in the air. “Fair enough.”
And then, to indulge you, he throws in some more topics you should cover before heading back to work. 
After this interaction you're left thinking that this will either be the greatest time you've had in your life, or the worst. 
-*-
During your free afternoon, you compile the list on your laptop, complete with a spreadsheet so you can note down Law’s answers and your own. You’ll then share the list so you both can study and leave nothing to chance.
You arrive exactly on time and by the second knock, Law opens the door to his apartment to let you in. He must’ve come directly from the clinic - or the hospital - with barely time to change, because he’s still in jeans and a dress shirt - with half the buttons undone, showing off his amazing chest piece.
As you stare at him from outside his apartment, a definite blush on your cheeks, as you feel yourself burning up, he leans his arm against the threshold while the corner of his lips slowly curls up. “Hi.” That low timbre in his voice has you gulping in no time. His amber gaze shifts to your laptop and he lets out a low chuckle. “You came fully prepared, I see.”
Clearing your throat, you manage to let out a pathetic ‘yes’ to accompany your nod and his grin intensifies. “Come in.” He slurs, barely moving so you’re forced to brush against his body to enter his apartment. 
You immediately remove your jacket upon entering - the heat is already overwhelming. As you take a look around you notice he really is someone who’s always in control. His home is minimalist - at least the living room! Who knows if he has a hidden room where he hoards comics or coins or something like that - and everything’s in its rightful place. He has taste, the furniture is beautiful, but it doesn’t scream opulence. 
“Nice place.” You say genuinely while removing your shoes by the entrance.
“Thanks.” Law says as he closes the door and gestures towards the couch. The small end table has an assortment of cookies and two cups of steaming coffee ready for you. 
“Third-best?” You ask as you approach the refreshments, pointing at the coffee.
“I’m aiming for second. I bribed Sanji to point me to some tastier beans than the ones he showed you.” Your grin matches his.
“Competitive much?”
“You have no idea.” The intensity of his gaze doubles as you both sit on the couch. “So,” he starts while changing the subject, “what’s this all about? Fifty questions turned to one hundred?”
He’s joking, but he’s also right, so you give him a strained smile while you open your laptop and set it on your lap. “Something like that. Get comfortable.”
With a groan he picks up his coffee mug and lets himself slide down the couch while you giggle. 
-*-
“Okay, that about settles tattoos and marks!” You don’t really have any more clothes to remove, as you’ve already stripped down to your simple dress, yet the heat remains unbearable. Law’s torso is still bare, since he showed you all his tattoos, and, even though you already knew they were sexy as hell, you were still unprepared. “Now…”
“There’s more?” He interrupts, another muffled groan escaping his lips as he puts on his shirt but leaves it open. “I refuse.” He closes your laptop as he sits down near you, the gesture earning him an indignant gasp.
“Law!”
“You’re too much in control.” He says your name sternly. “This is looking like an interrogation. What happened to talking and doing this the normal way? Where’s the spontaneity?” He adds cheekily, his arms resting behind his neck as he leans back, his chest muscles rippling with the gesture. 
“There can’t be any. We need to be thorough, we need to sell this act! How can we do that if we don’t know everything there is to know about each other?” You spent hours on this list - even though you didn’t tell him that - this is the one thing, the only thing you can control because all the variables of the wedding in itself are daunting and terrifying.
You can’t control who will believe or doubt you, you can't control how Doflamingo will act with both of you, hell, Law doesn’t even know who all the guests are! What if any of the Vinsmokes are there? What if Ichiji is there?
Too many things can go wrong!
“We can very well sell this act on actions alone.” His voice promises more. Your heart hammers against your chest as your pulse quickens. The idea of not having control over the situation is still too overwhelming. 
“That’s impossible, Law.”
“It's not.” He leans forward, leaving just a breath of space between you, his amber gaze locking you in effortlessly. “If you think that knowing my favourite book or food is going to be the only thing that convinces people - especially my uncle - you’re dead wrong.” His soft breath tickles your eyelids, he’s that close. He might be trying to make you flinch, or pull back. To challenge you and see if you recoil from his proximity.
You don't.
You stand defiantly, your eyes never leaving his gaze. Even if you're burning up, heat pooling somewhere in your belly, turning into an ache between your legs. “It’s not completely about what we say or how we say it. It’s about how we act. But mostly…” His hand moves, brushing a strand of hair away from your face and you tremble slightly. “It’s about how you react to me.”
You fight to regain control of your breathing, but then you counter his gaze with a mocking grin. “You think a few light touches and a piercing gaze have any effect on me, Law?” You try to scoff but the sound comes out weird and high-pitched. “I think you’re underestimating my self-control.”
“Really?” The huskiness in his voice sends shivers down your spine.
“Hmm, hmm!” Is your clever reply. You’re bluffing and he knows it.
“Then why are you clutching your laptop so tightly?” He raises an eyebrow as your eyes dart downward to your hand. Your knuckles are already turning white from gripping the laptop and you curse, trying to play off your gesture with a slight shrug, but he’s seen through you.
His other hand grazes your bare leg, starting at the knee and climbing up, a phantom touch, a mere whisper of his fingers against your skin. Your breath hitches as he locks your eyes with his gaze again. “You don’t need to control everything, all the time. I’ve got this. I’ve got you. It’s not a list that will make us believable. It’s this.” He leans slowly forward, his lips brushing ever so lightly against the corner of your own as his fingers graze the inside of your thigh, leaving a trail of warmth behind. 
Your gasp turns into a soft moan-like sigh and you almost melt into his touch as your body gives in. How can something so trivial as a light touch feel so damn good?
“There. People will believe that.” He smirks, satisfied, as he leans back against the couch, leaving you breathing hard, trying to regain composure, as if he hasn’t completely aroused you with just a touch and a few words. “Is this enough for today?”
You get up, leaving your laptop on the couch and start pacing back and forth, hands wringing together, trying to regain feeling in your limbs. How could he affect you so much with a few touches? A few words? One glance?
What’s this hold he has on you?
“No.” You find your voice after clearing your throat and try again. “It’s not enough. We need to know how to behave as… as boyfriend and girlfriend. Like you said, we need to have knowledge about each other, but we need to get accustomed to each other’s touch.” A sigh escapes your lips. This is dangerous territory. “To… kissing…” His eyebrows raise but you pay it no mind as you continue, already rambling a bit. 
“I don’t have a lot of experience with boyfriends…” A crimson blush spreads across your cheeks. “My ex… well when we were out in public, at big events, he tended to ignore me. He liked to showcase me as a pretty thing dangling from his arm, but then he didn’t really care much about me, drinking with his acquaintances, not caring about where I was or what I was doing… He barely touched me. Just enough so people knew we were together, but that's not going to cut it if we want to fool your uncle. I don’t really know how we should act and-...”
“Okay.” Law stands up and takes a step closer to you, making you stop pacing. His presence becomes suddenly overwhelming and commanding. 
“Okay, what?” 
“Okay, I’ll show you how I would behave with you in public, so you get used to it. I would never, ever ignore you. You’re too special to be left alone.” A flicker of something primal touches his eyes. A sort of possession in his gaze. “And I wouldn’t barely touch you.” His smirk makes your breath hitch. There, this right here is dangerous territory. 
But it's necessary. 
As you nod, he steps even closer. His hand reaches as he places it in the small of your back, his fingers clinging to you as he pulls you nearer. His eyes never leave yours, though the amber is slowly giving way to a darker shade, his pupils dilating. “If this were real, I’d keep you close to me, so people would know we were together.” You swallow a lump as he pulls you even closer, showing you how he’d stake his claim on you, a bit possessive, but nothing aggressive, just a statement. 
“And if this were real, I’d steal light touches, to keep you focused on me.” His other hand traces the curve of your neck and shoulder, slowly trailing down your arm and stopping at your wrist, his thumb brushing small circles against the sensitive skin. You can feel your heart beating erratically against your chest, his voice enveloping you in a thick haze: commanding, seductive, enthralling. You try to focus and remain composed, but he’s making it so hard.
The fire in your belly stirs and ignites again. The embers turning bright and stoking the flames of desire within you. 
He tilts his face, his soft lips grazing your earlobe and his whisper creates goosebumps on your neck. “If this were real, I’d have you in my arms all night, to remind everyone that you’re mine.” His hand slides up your side, his thumb grazing the underside of your ribs, just barely brushing against the curve of your breast. A fleeting touch, a feather-like graze that sends a tingling sensation through you, making your breath catch in your throat as a hiss escapes your lips. 
The flame roars, grows and spreads its tendrils through you.
Law’s lips brush against your collarbone, sending heatwaves down your chest that pool in your stomach. Your hands clench, aching to touch him and pull him closer, but you remain firm, grasping the last bit of control you think you still have. “If this were real,” he whispers against the hollow of your throat, then pulls slightly back as his thumb brushes against your jaw, tilting your head upward so you can meet his gaze, “I’d make you beg for my kiss.”
You can barely breathe. Law’s presence is overwhelming, he commands all your senses, there’s nothing you can think about other than his voice, his lips, his touch. Every other thought, every other worry is erased from your mind. All you can think about is that you need his lips against yours; you need his touch. Now. 
Is this what he meant by helping you let go? Surrender? 
Somehow, you find a semblance of strength to speak. “I don’t beg.” Your voice comes out ragged and hoarse, charged with intensity, pure need and unbridled desire. 
Law’s smile widens, lending him a sort of unhinged - but still very much in control - look that makes you weak in the knees. “No?” He murmurs, his voice filled with amusement. “Are you sure?”
His lips graze against yours, not a kiss, barely even a touch - just a tease. His hand slides back down to your lower back and he pulls you impossibly close to him, his body heat radiating from his bare chest and pressing against you as you tremble and squirm under his touch. 
“Look at you,” his voice is tantalisingly low, slurred and full of promises, “I barely even touched you and you’re already a mess, sweetheart.” His fingers keep tracing your arms and neck, his lips taunting and teasing your most sensitive spots. You’re trembling and squirming under his caresses, hot, hard pants leaving your lips, your breath slipping away from you in ragged gasps. 
You are a mess. 
“I want to hear you ask for it. Beg. Tell me what you want.” He whispers in your ear, his thumb brushing against your lower lip and you close your eyes, whimpering involuntarily as your body responds to every touch, every teasing word. He’s right, he’s so right. 
He hasn’t even kissed you and you’re already falling apart. 
“Just say it.” He urges you.
You clench your fists, trying to regain control, trying so hard to win back something you never had to begin with. But it’s all too much. It’s too overwhelming and you need some sort of release.
“Please…” Your whisper is barely audible but you know he hears you. He tilts his head to lock his gaze into your eyes, his hand on your neck, holding you and tilting you towards him.
“Louder.”
If you had any thoughts left in your mushed brain, you wouldn’t be able to hear it because the pounding of your heart reverberates against your ears. “Please.” You repeat, louder this time, your voice trembling as you succumb to that final loss of control. “Kiss me.” 
To the final surrender.
Law smirks, satisfied and pleased with your response, his teasing successful. “If this were real,” he starts again as his lips brush ever so slightly against yours, “you’d be begging like this all the time.”
He’s still not kissing you. He’s a breath away and not giving you the release you crave, the one you so desperately need. “Please, Law!” You beg again, a muffled hiccup leaving your lips. His jaw clenches slightly and he grunts - that primal sound that makes you roll your eyes in anticipation - before he leans in and captures your lips with his, his hand pressing on your neck, tilting your jaw as he pulls you closer. 
He starts slow as you moan into the sensation, but soon his hands grip you tighter and he deepens the kiss, his mouth claiming yours with fierce intensity. He dominates the kiss, holding you against him as his tongue slides against yours in a wordless claim.
You whimper again as you dig your nails into his bare chest, holding on for your sanity and trying to ground yourself as your body and mind unravel for him, surrendering completely to his hold, to his control. He kisses you as if you are truly his. His touch, his scent, his presence: it’s all overwhelming and intense and you want to give all of yourself to him, because this sensation is freeing.
He pulls away too soon and you’re left trembling. Ragged breaths escape your swollen lips and you can feel your cheeks burning. You’ve never felt this way before. Your eyes widen as you stare at him, dazed and completely undone. 
You’re at his mercy.
“If this were real, I’d kiss you like this every time.” 
You can only nod, your head still dizzy as you try to regain control. Your mind is still too addled from the way he made you fall apart without breaking a sweat. His gaze softens somewhat as he pats you lightly in the head and gives you a smug smile. 
“Good girl.”
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lovebittenbyevans · 3 days
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Fuel In The Fire | Ch.2
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Summary: You had a on and off relationship with Geto Suguru while being in college again. You juggled seeing him when you can until Gojo Satoru came into your life. Things get complicated when you tried to keep the relationship with Geto going and tried to keep a distance from being around Gojo. You began to wonder if you can actually see a real future with Geto or is it too late to moved forward into a new direction
Pairing: F1driver! Gojo Satoru x collegestudent! Female Reader x F1driver! Geto Suguru
Warnings: cursed words, slight flashback, slight angst
Previous: Chapter 1
Chapter 2
There it was….
Formula One Driver Gojo Satoru getting close with Geto Suguru girlfriend Y/N
It was out for everybody around the world to see it. There was nothing nobody could do. It was out to the whole world.
The footage shows Gojo looking almost like he wants to kiss you. You just stood there staring at him while you let him be that close to you. There was no turning back now.
“So, what’s going to happen between you and Geto?” Miwa asks, taking a seat across from you.
You raised your cup of coffee to your lips and took a sip. “I mean I can totally see you two being endgame for real.” Miwa continues to talk.
You let out a sigh as you place your cup on the table. “I don’t know. Geto and I have always been complicated together.” You were telling her truth.
“And what about Satoru?” She asks.
Letting out a breath, you thought about how to respond to her question. You didn’t want to say the wrong thing either.
You shrug. “There’s not much to say.”
Miwa raised her eyebrows as she gulped the rest of her drink. You were not in the mood to talk about your emotions and feelings.
“Uh huh.” She rose up from her chair and grabbed her backpack off the floor. “Let’s go, professor said we have guests coming to our class.”
You got up from your chair while holding your backpack. You walked out of the coffee shop cafe headed directly to campus. You step inside the school and go straight to your class.
“Please don’t bore us today.” Miwa grumbles, entering the classroom.
You entered the classroom and saw your professor Grant with a few Formula One drivers. You immediately recognized who they were.
Fuck!
Choso, Toji, Geto and Nanami were all here. You wanted to say something but decided not to. You were hoping your day went smoothly but you had a feeling what kind of day it would be.
You were going to take a seat next to Miwa when someone called out to you. “Y/N!” You gently turned around to see Geto standing there with the boys.
“H–Hey.” You stutter a little.
Stop being nervous, y/n
You walked over to them and hugged everyone except Geto, who gave you a kiss. “Let’s talk after class.” He whispered in your ear.
You stepped back as Choso spoke to you. “How are you doing, Y/N?” He was always so sweet to you even though you had to get used to him having his pierced eyebrow and tattoos on his neck.
“I’m good, can’t complain.” You said with a smile.
Toji and Nanami's gaze were fixed on you. You already knew the kind of looks they were both giving you.
Fuck my life! You wanted to scream those words so loud.
“Five minutes until we begin class.” Professor Grant announces.
You clear your throat. “I better go find my–” Toji cuts you off, he gives you another look. “Bring your ass over here, Y/N.”
Toji sometimes can be tough on you but you know he means well and he is looking out for the both of you.
You moved one step closer to him. “I have to take a seat, Toji.”
His dark eyes locked on yours. “When are you going to stop leading him on?”
You honestly shouldn’t be talking about this in class right now. This was not the time and place for it.
“Um, how is that any of your business?” You mock him.
Sometimes you wish Toji would be less protective and more polite in a way. He was always straight to the point.
“Y/N, I’m just looking out for the both of you but we both know whatever between you two has been going on for a while now.” He says.
Nanami joins the conversation. “He got a point there.”
You looked at Nanami as you heard Choso trying not to chuckle behind you. “Look, Geto has nothing to worry about.”
“Keep lying, buttercup.” Choso muttered.
You scoff and walk away, walking to your seat next to Miwa. You start to get annoyed that they're here. You sat down and took your notebook and black pen out of your backpack.
“What was that about?” Maki turned around in her seat in front of you.
You rolled your eyes. “Well, hello to you too”
Miwa chuckled softly. “All of them look so glad to see you.” You roll your eyes and feel annoyed.
As the class finally began, Professor Grant introduced the race car drivers who would be taking over the class for the day. You mostly listened to what they were saying.
“How do you deal with the media following you every race?” One of the students raised their hand while paying attention to them.
This time it was Geto who answered. “We mostly ignored them while focusing on what’s not going on around us.”
“And how do you deal with dating a college student in your late thirties and she is in her early thirties?” Another student asked a question.
And the shit begins
You immediately feel humiliated, but not ashamed. You drop deeper into your seat, resting your palm on your brow to cover your expression.
“Careful kid.” Toji warned him.
Choso pushed off the professor's desk. “We didn’t come here for you guys to ask personal questions that have nothing to do with you.”
Nanami interrupted. “We are here for you guys to learn so act like it.” His voice was serious.
You glance at them and mouth. “Thank you.” The three of them just nodded as they continued on with talking to the class.
“You don’t feel how many miles you go in a race car. You get used to it.” Geto said.
You wrote some stuff in your notebook before the professor dismissed class. You rose up from your seat placing your notebook and pen in your backpack.
“I must say maybe Toji feels the most about you.” Maki slung her backpack over her shoulder.
You shake your head. “In his dreams. No, he’s just protective, that's all. So are the others.”
Maki slung her backpack over her shoulder. “We will wait for you out there.” She walked out the classroom with Miwa behind her.
You close your backpack holding it with your hand going straight to the professor's desk. You gave a hug to each one of them before pulling away.
“Thank you guys again.” You tell them.
Nanami shrugs. “Don’t mention it.”
Choso fixes his hat on his head. “Geto, we will be outside waiting for you.” He walks off heading out the door.
Toji gave you a glare look as he walked out with Choso and Nanami. You stood there standing in front of Geto. You didn’t rush to speak first.
“Am I a joke to you? Why can’t you take me seriously?”
His question caught you off guard.
You slung your backpack over your shoulder. “No, I've been with you this whole time G.”
He shakes his head. “Don’t bullshit me, y/n. I see the way you were around him in that video.”
You huffs. “Nothing happened unlike you and her.” He knows exactly who you are talking about.
You see the way she looks at him every time you are with him. A part of you never saw yourself being in this type of situation.
He rolled his eyes and crossed his arms. “She doesn’t mean shit to me.” He took a step toward you. “I always wanted to be with you. You know that.”
Your gaze was on him. “Gojo, doesn’t mean nothing to me.”
He sighs, pressing his lips against your forehead. “Ok.” You can tell he didn’t believe you but he decided to brush it off.
You close your eyes for a moment then open your eyes. “Ok.” You turned around and walked out of the classroom door.
Choso, Nanami and Toji nodded at you before they walked away with Geto right by their side. Choso looked over his shoulder at you with those dark brown eyes. “Make good choices, buttercup!” He yelled out.
You suck your teeth and lean against the wall. “Kill me now.” You mutter to yourself. You didn't notice the tear rolling down your cheek.
You should have listened to yourself before you got into these situations. You should have let Geto go his own way but for some reason you can’t see him out of your life.
Being around Gojo that day brought back some memories you had avoided thinking about all this time. Even the words he used to say to you when you were in your mid twenties.
“I can never imagine my life without you. No matter where we go, what happens between us I will always love you.” Gojo said seriously.
You look at him not saying a word.
“I will always be here for you.” He says.
From that moment, you wanted to kiss him but that’s when Geto called you that day. Those words never went away no matter how hard you try.
You wipe your tears away with your hand when your two best friends approach you. “Y/N, are you ok?” Miwa had a concerned expression on her face.
“What’s wrong?” Maki asked.
You had to pull yourself together. Almost every student was staring at you and whispering to each other.
“I’m fine. I’m fine.” You sniffle, taking your phone out of your jeans pocket.
A bunch of formula one fanpages were following you on instagram as you looked at the notification on your screen. You received a few text messages from interviewers who wanted to talk to you about Geto and Gojo.
You ignored the notification and checked your text messages.
Geto: Race this weekend, let me know if you can make it
Geto: I just want to make sure we are good babe
Geto: I love you and I’m not losing you ❤️
Those words made your heart shattered to pieces. You heard him say those three words a few times to you even though you didn’t pay it no mind.
“Oh, he loves you!” Maki raised her voice.
You glare at her and put your phone back into your pocket. “Keep your voice down, Ma!” You quickly walk with them not letting nobody hear your conversation.
“He got it bad for you.” Miwa smirks.
You headed straight to your next class while laughing with them both. You only wish your life was normal again but you figured it was about to get complicated.
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The Smallest Man Who Ever Lived
Part 3
Five Hargreeves x Fem!Reader
(Booth Five)
Summary: After finding out about the seven years Lila and Five spent together, reader walks in to a diner in between all time and space and finds exactly what she didn’t know she was looking for
Warnings: Some cursing, angst
A/N: They’re may be some major grammar errors because I’ve had a massive migraine for several days now but I wanted to get it out as soon as possible ❤️ I hope it’s up to expectations. I had so much fun writing it. This is the last part and then there will be a short epilogue!
Also, Five is still very much alive and dealing with the consequences of his choices. Everything else is left up to interpretation
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————
“Come on, there’s someone you need to meet,” Y/N said, holding her hand out for Five to take, “Blink us to the subway.”
“Y/N, what are you-“
“My God, Five, for once in your life would you just do as your told,” she snapped, frustration bleeding from every word, “Blink us to the subway!”
He looked taken aback for a moment before he finally relented, taking her hand and blinking them to the terminal.
She immediately started in the direction she knew the Deli would be in. Five followed her, more than a little confused by her behavior.
He trailed behind her down the stairs but stepped back in surprise when the marquis lights of the deli came in to view.
His steps faltered and he knitted his eyebrows together in confusion, “Max?”
“Max,” she confirmed, “You are, in fact, seeing your name. Come on.”
He followed behind her cautiously but she did not hesitate to open the door of the deli, stepping in like she was a frequent patron of this place in the middle of all of time.
Five instinctively put a hand on the small of her back, ready to protect her if necessary but she inched away from him. She acted like his touch was the equivalent to an white-hot, iron poker. She was also incredibly too comfortable in this new environment.
And he realized why as soon as he was over the threshold. It was like looking in to a shattered mirror. He saw himself all around the room, in various positions as both patron and employees of Max’s deli.
A Five in the middle of the room stood up as soon as he noticed them, a look of sheer surprise on his face. Y/N strolled forward without hesitation and met him half-way. This Five, this him, held out his arms towards her and she fell in to them, welcoming his embrace. All the while his eyes glared over her head, straight in to Five’s skull. If looks could kill.
“What are you doing here?”
“We need your help.” She explained, “Things are going south topside and I figured when it comes to apocalypses, the more Fives, the merrier.”
“I’m sorry, does someone want to explain to me what the actual fuck is going on?” Five interrupted them.
Booth Five bared his teeth, “What’s going on, asshole, is that you left her down here on her own after you fucked-.”
“Hey, no!” Y/N put a hand on his chest to urge him to stop talking, “Come sit down, Five, and we’ll explain.”
She gestured to Booth’s usual table.
“You’re giving him far too much Grace, darling,” Booth growled in her ear as she slid in to the seat beside him, completely ignoring her Five’s pleading eyes as he realized that she was not going to take take the place next to him.
Y/N placed a gentle hand on Booth’s thigh under the table, giving it a soft squeeze in attempt to keep him calm. She didn’t need them going after each other before she even got the first word out.
Booth took that as his cue to move closer to her, closing the small space between them, purposely brushing his thigh against hers. She ignored him, but couldn’t help the goose-bumps that erupted across her skin at his close proximity. It was crazy what reactions he could bring out of her, even with her timeline’s version of him sitting across from them.
Five eyed them, his mouth set in to a hard line like he was trying, with great difficulty, not to say something.
“Explain,” he demanded, “What is going on, Y/N?”
“It’s a waypoint,” she told him, “they’re all you from different timelines.”
Five looked around the deli, taking in all of the different versions of himself. Most of them were lounging, enjoying lunch or a newspaper, while others seemed fresh out of whatever hell their timeline had to offer. A version of him was obviously very drunk, attempting to drown his sorrows in a bottle of something hard.
“How did you even know about this place?”
“I found it when you brought me down here after…everything.” She recalled, “Or more like it found me.”
Waiter Five stopped at the table, sitting two black coffees, two pastrami sandwiches and a cup of tea in front of them.
She smiled up at him, “Could you please tell the kitchen that they’re going to burn the brisket this afternoon and that they should be extra vigilant about it.”
Waiter Five seemed unperturbed by her prophecy, as if he had witnessed them a thousand times. Which she realized, he probably had. “Sure thing, sweetheart. Thanks for the heads up.”
“You’re welcome.”
“You’re not going to like that,” Booth said as Five reached for his cup, pulling a pastrami sandwich towards himself simultaneously.
“Can we stay on track, boys?” Y/N chastised, “We have a lot to figure out.”
Booth launched in to his explanation about how there was never supposed to be multiple timelines. And how their existence was the very problem they’d been trying to solve this entire time.
“When you look ahead, what do you see, Y/N?” Five questioned her.
She closed her eyes, trying to block out the various clattering and background noises of the deli, but try as she might she was met with nothing but a solid, unyielding, darkness. She expected it to feel cold or maybe lonely, but it didn’t feel like anything at all. There was nothing there at all.
“I don’t feel anything,” she concluded, opening her eyes to find two identical, worried faces watching her closely. “I can’t see anything. Usually I can at least gather little glimpses of things I can piece together but it’s dark.”
“If that’s what you’re seeing, then that means my plan will work.”
————
Five bolted out of the deli so swiftly, she didn’t have time for a proper goodbye with Booth.
She was thinking about going back when Five grabbed her arm, stopping her in her tracks, “What the hell was all of that back there? Is there something going on between you and…me? Him?”
She pulled herself out of his grip, “And why would you care if there was, Five?”
“Because I love you,” his voice cracked, “You know I love you.”
“You didn’t love me enough to not fuck Lila,” her voice wobbled, but she wouldn’t cry. Not over this. Not anymore. “You didn’t love me enough to not fall in love with her too.”
“It was seven years, Y/N. We…we didn’t think we were going to find a way home. We were alone. We were tired. You have to understand that.”
“No, I really don’t,” the anger in her chest flared up once again, red hot and burning, “You spent forty years alone
looking for a way back to your family and you did everything you could to do so. But you’re telling me that this time you gave up after just seven? I KNOW you, Five, and I know that deep down, in your heart of hearts, you always knew that you’d find a way. But you got comfortable with her and you just stopped trying.”
“What’s worse is that I could understand if it were just the three of us mixed up in this mess, but it’s not! Lila is MARRIED! Lila is a MOTHER! Lila is married to your brother and the mother to your nieces and nephew. You drove their marriage apart. You knew you would be breakup h up a family and that still didn’t stop you. You weren’t alone anymore, Five. I was there. I’ve BEEN there. I’ve always been there and that still wasn’t enough. You aren’t this sad little boy lost alone in the apocalypse. You’re a full-grown, adult man and it’s time that you own up to your mistakes. And this is a big one.”
“So what you’re saying is that I’ll never be able to fix this?” He asked, “You’re never going to forgive me? You won’t even try?”
“How could I, Five?” She took a deep breath, steadying herself, “How could I when all I can see when I think about you, is her? You kissing her. You fucking her. You loving her. And that’ll always be there. It might dull over time but it will always be there playing in the back of my mind. So, no, we can’t fix this and I don’t want to. I won’t put myself through it just to come out the other side burned again. I respect myself too much.”
“And him?”
“That’s none of your business.”
“He’s literally me. It’s very much my business.” Five was trying to sound casual, but she could tell that her words were eating at him. That it stung more than he would ever let on.
“But he’s not you, not really,” she said pointedly, “And he loves me, Five. In a way I’m not sure you ever did. Why else would we spend all of these years together and never actually move forward with our relationship? But none of that matters anyways. If we do this correctly, we’ll be gone and so will every other timeline. We’ll all cease to exist. And maybe that’s for the best.”
They stared at each other for a moment, a silent standoff.
“I do love you, you know,” Five’s voice was barely above a whisper, but his tone shattered her heart all over again, “But I never felt like I deserved you and I’m so sorry that it took me this long to realize that you’re the best thing that could have ever happened to me.”
“I’m sorry that it took you that long, too,” she said, “And I’m sorry that things have to end this way, but they are ending. In more ways than one. And we have to face it whether we’re ready for it or not.”
————
They did it. Not only had they restored things the way they should be, but they had managed to save themselves in the process.
They had lost their powers again, for good this time, but she didn’t care. If she was being truly honest with herself, she never wanted them back anyways. It was nice to look forward to the future without tiny glimpses of what was to come. Glimpses that usually set her on edge and kept her from truly living in the present.
She and Five had gone their separate ways. It was better that way. They both moved out of their shared apartment and she moved in with Allison, Claire and Klaus for a while until she found her footing again. Eventually that footing came in the form of a steady job downtown and a small studio apartment she could call her own.
As for Lila and Diego, they were continuing to try to make things work for their family. Lila had personally come to her and apologized once the dust settled. She told her that she and Diego were now attending couples counseling and were trying to move past things.
As much as she should hate Lila, she couldn’t. They would get along for Diego’s sake. Things were never going to be the way they were before, but they didn’t need to be.
Despite her newfound contentment, she thought about Booth Five often. It saddened her to know that it was likely that he no longer even existed somewhere out there.
She thought about how every Five in that deli had fought so hard to make things right but none of them had even come close to an iota, a fraction, of the happiness that they deserved.
———
It was a rainy Sunday morning and she was spending it curled up on her couch with trashy, mindless TV and a cup of tea.
She was just contemplating the idea of a nap when a soft, hesitant knock sounded at her door.
“Hold on!” She called, pausing the tv and wrapping the blanket around herself to hide the fact that she wasn’t wearing a bra and her pajamas had seen much better days. She hadn’t been expecting company.
She looked through the peep hole, her heart dropping a bit at who she found on the other side.
Five stood there, his hands in his pockets, rocking on his heels, as he waited for her to open the door. She hadn’t seen him since an impromptu family brunch over a month ago. He typically made himself scarce when she was around. Not that she blamed him.
She did a small round of the breathing exercises her therapist taught her before undoing the chain and padlock.
She had barely cracked the door open when she realized that something was just slightly off about her visitor. His eyes found hers and her breath caught in her chest. Those green eyes, as familiar to her as her own, did not belong to the Five she had expected to see.
“Booth?” She gasped, her head spinning.
He looked utterly perplexed by her nickname for him, but a grin spread across his face anyways, “You call me Booth?”
“How?” She squeaked, throwing the door open, “It is you, right?”
“It’s me,” he confirmed, “God, I’ve missed you.”
She threw herself at him, blanket forgotten, and he caught her with a surprised grunt, steadying her on her feet as she peppered his face with kisses. Wherever she could reach, she planted her lips there.
“How?” She breathlessly questioned him between kisses, “How are you here?”
“It’s a long story,” he told her, unwilling to let her go now that he finally had her in his arms, “One I promise I’ll tell you later, but right now, please don’t stop kissing me.”
She complied, stepping back just long enough to yank him in to her apartment by his collar, slamming the door behind them.
As soon as he heard the latch click, his hands were on her, starving for affection. Y/N returned those affections tenfold, scaling him without reservation.
Caution be damned.
“You’re here,” she repeated over and over, still unable to wrap her mind around it.
“I’m here,” he reassured her, running his fingertips along her spine, taking in the feel of her, “And I’m not going anywhere, if you’ll have me.”
She pressed her lips to his in answer, her fingers threading into his hair, pulling him closer.
“As if I would let you get away again.”
He chuckled against her lips before deepening the kiss, moving his hands to her waist. He dug his fingertips in there, oh so deliciously, and she melted against him. Everything with him had always felt so right, natural, from the moment he first held her in the deli.
Fated. Meant to be. Call it what you will, but she knew that being with him was worth all of the inherent risks that came with it.
They were lying in her bed, wrapped up in each other, as Booth drew lazy circles up and down her arm.
“You don’t mind me calling you Booth, do you? It was just easier to differentiate between the two of you in my head that way.”
He laughed, pressing a kiss to the crown of her head, “Sweetheart, you can call me whatever you want as long as you call me yours.”
Her cheeks warmed and she buried her face in his neck, taking in the scent that was uniquely him. Uniquely Booth.
“I love you,” she hummed.
“I love you too,” he tilted her chin up so that they were nose to nose, “Thank you for giving me a chance.”
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ohgeezlya · 1 month
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SOMETHIN’ STUPID | Five Hargreeves x Fem!Reader
Summary; In which everything is outed between Five, your husband, and Lila, your brother in law’s wife.
“Then he goes and spoils it all by saying something stupid like ‘I love you.’
Warning; Angst, cheating, spoilers for S4.
A/n: I found this season to be terrible, but ugh the angst I can make with it is juicy.
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You feel nauseous, bile raising in the back of your throat, tears pricking your eyes threatening to fall. You feel embarrassed. All eyes on you, Five, Diego, and Lila.
You want to scream.
You’ve known Five since The Temps Commission, and you’ve spent years together happily married. You felt awful for being jealous of his looks towards Lila, but you just thought you were being paranoid; you could trust him. You always had.
Still, you were right. They had both been acting strangely when they returned. Exchanging heartbreaking smiles, lingering looks, and delicate touches.
Then the fucking bracelet.
You slap Five across the face with an unsteady hand, hoping to make a mark. Your wedding ring was on the hand that you smacked him, and the blow caused a tiny cut in his face.
Loud ‘oos’ and a gasp come from the siblings on the couch.
"You are disgusting. Were you with his wife, your brother's fucking wife?" Five just looked at you, his cheek cupping, grief rushing through him. You push him away when he reaches out to you.
“You don’t understand. We were stuck there for seven years. Every day I thought about coming home to you, but it felt hopeless. I felt like I was going insane.“ He trying, desperately wanting you to understand, but how can you?
“So, what, You gave up? You gave up on finding a way back?” You shake your head in disbelief. Five would never give up, the man in front of you is not the man you met all those years ago.
The one you married would’ve fought tooth and nail to get back to you.
“I knew something was going on since you got back; I’m not blind, Five. I… I thought I was being paranoid; I felt horrible for not trusting you, my husband." You look down at your ring; its typical shine is dulling.
All those years, the surviving, the fighting, saving the world. Together. Was all forgotten and all for nothing within a couple of hours—for you at least.
“It took seven years for 45 long ones to be nothing.” You mumbled taking the ring off, and throwing it at him—which he caught, a terrified glance at it in his hand.
There was a stunned silence, Klaus perched on the couch waiting for more along with the others.
You feel exposed, you don't want to be vulnerable while there’s onlookers, gawking at your ruined marriage taking place in your in-law’s living room.
“Five, I hope those fleeting moments with her were worth it.”
You turn your heel and walk away, ignoring the pleas from Five and the siblings for you to come back.
Some part of you that will love Five unconditionally wants him to run after you.
Your hands are tight around your arms, shaking.
You remember the train Five talked about...
You cautiously take steps down to the train station, the overhead lights buzzing eerily. No one was there, only yourself and the lone train.
Staggering to one of the doors, you quickly get on. Not looking back.
You take a seat, when your legs give out. Tears watering down your face, you do nothing to wipe them away. You’re tired. You don’t look back.
The train dings, the lights flickering, the train ramping up, and the doors shutting. You nervously tried to play with your ring finger but there was nothing to fidget with.
You don’t look back.
If you did.
You would’ve seen Five. Standing there solemnly, heavy tears going down his face as the weight of this breaks him. His fist tightens around your wedding ring, you leaving breaks him.
The wind from the train blows his hair to the side as he watches you leave.
Never to be seen in this timeline again.
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venusjeon · 11 months
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angel in the marble
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after you fail to pickpocket him, the famous yet arrogant artist Jeon Jungkook takes you off the streets to make you his servant, and the more you know him, the more you realise he's not as detestable as everyone claims he is.
♔ PAIRING: michelangelo!jungkook x servant!reader
♔ GENRE: high renaissance au, angst, smut, humour
♔ WORD COUNT: 8k
♔ WARNINGS: homelessness, stealing, mild swearing/violence/drinking, 90% of this is bickering lmao, mentions of minor characters' death, jealousy and kinda possessiveness?, referenced unconsensual groping (not by jk), a bit of blasphemy, making out, groping, fingering, rough angry sexxx, choking, slapping
♔ AUTHOR'S NOTE: fun fact this is mostly historically accurate! jk's characterisation, the grocery list doodles, the sack of rome, the beef with his brother, the encounter with his rival (raphael)... are all taken from michelangelo's actual life, even some stuff is quoted from his letters lol. man was fanfic material.
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1529, Rome
“How much for that one?”
“No, that one’s sold already.”
It was a lively morning. After days of heavy rainfall, those of high social class were eager to get out and meet under the gentle sun of spring, whose glare reflected on the precious stones of their jewellery; while those of low, out of necessity, couldn’t wait to reopen their businesses or set up their stalls and get back to work. You liked to eye them all as you strolled the streets of Rome.
“To whom?”
“Your friend Taehyung.”
“Agh… How much is that prick paying you?”
The point of the matter was that it was bustling, some colliding if they looked away from where they were going for more than a breath. It worked in your favour for it was then easier to make yourself scarce right after stealing bags of coins, such as those of the three men seemingly bargaining by a workshop’s entrance out of which a large block of marble was being dragged. Perfect.
“Three ducats.”
“Three?! He’s robbing you of two ducats. I’ll pay you the five it’s worth.”
You kept your head low as you approached the pair that seemed wealthier and with those stealthy hands of yours unfastened the bags tied to their belts. After all, pickpocketing was a skill you’d had under your own for some years now, so this was bound to go smoothly.
Because you didn’t realise there was a guardian with them, perhaps you’d grown arrogant.
“I’m sorry, maestro. It’s reserved.”
“But it’ll become a waste in his possession!”
As you slipped away into the crowd, mouth watering at the fresh-baked bread you were going to devour as soon as bought, this brown dog leaped up at you out of nowhere, ignoring your desperate efforts to shake him off. If anything, they caused him to bark.
No, no, no…
The three men turned to the scene playing out not so far, and thinking his dog was bothering you one of them shouted, “Bam, come here, boy!” but as he obediently ran to his owner, you were too slow to hide the bags in your hands. It only took the pair a second to make them out, check whether theirs still hung on their belts, find them not, work out you’d stolen them, look back up, and find you not either.
Of course, you’d made your escape by then, dived into the sea of people and swum through them as quickly as possible, only stopping when you reached an empty vaulted alley to catch your breath.
That was ridiculously close. If you weren’t more careful next–
Your train of thought was interrupted by someone grabbing you by the arm from behind and pushing you against the nearest wall. A grunt accompanied the thud, and a gasp followed at the sight of the two men from before—dog included. Pinned in place, it’d be a bad idea to fight back or attempt to run away again. Fuck’s sake.
“Do you know what happens to thieves?” the one cornering you asked so close that when the cold breeze rustled his hair, some strands grazed your face. You looked away to avoid the tickling rather than out of fear, or so you wanted to believe. “They have a hand cut off. Seems fair, doesn’t it, Jimin?”
By contrast, that Jimin didn’t look intimidating, otherwise still catching his breath from the chase, but he did snatch the coin bags from your hands. “It doesn’t have to be so, maestro. We got our money back. She’s… just a girl.”
“And that exempts her of crime?”
“Please, don’t report me,” you begged, humiliating as though it was.
“Why shouldn’t we?” the maestro scoffed. Maestro… You were being threatened by a damned craftsman, the other one probably his assistant.
“Because I don’t want to lose a hand?”
“Oh, but we wanted to lose money, did we?” You rolled your eyes, and he released his grip only to step away. “Take us to your father, brat. He’ll answer for you.”
It took you a moment to respond, “I don’t have a father, or anyone... Only I can answer for my actions.”
“You’re a beggar?” Jimin asked, taking pity as he studied your appearance for the first time. Dishevelled hair, tattered dress, unpleasant smell… Yes, they should’ve guessed.
“She doesn’t beg, though, does she? She steals.”
“Only from cunts.”
His head snapped to meet your glare, and Jimin laughed, “You seem to not know whom you speak to.” He could be Jesus for all you cared. Uninterested, you petted the dog, Bam, seeing as he’d leapt up at you again. “This is Jeon Jungkook.”
You froze. The Jeon Jungkook? The famous artist who painted and sculpted for the Pope? Whom faraway kings and even emperors commissioned? The one whose genius was said to be changing the world?
At the lack of attention, Bam returned to his master, and that snapped you out of your shock to ask, “Then why do you whine?” The two men frowned, having clearly expected an apology paired with the usual bootlicking. “As if you need that bag more than I!”
“What nerve,” he scoffed again, making you wince by grabbing your arm tighter than before and starting to drag you into the next street. “You’re going straight to the authorities!”
“Wait,” Jimin intervened, thank God. “Weren’t you in need of a servant, maestro?”
“So?”
Jimin pointed at you with his gaze as though it was obvious. “You’re in need of a servant, she’s in need of a roof.”
“I would rather have a hand cut off.”
“I would rather have her hand cut off too.”
Jungkook tried to resume dragging you, but Jimin blocked his way with a soft smile. “What’s your name?”
“Y/N…”
“Do you know how to take care of a household?” Slowly, you nodded, melancholy engulfing you at the memory of cooking or sweeping the floor with your mother once upon a time. Somehow, she always found a way to make chores fun... “Then you qualify for the job. You’ll have three meals a day and a bed to sleep on. And you, maestro, a servant who’ll work her hardest, lest you fire her and she ends up in the streets again.”
Both you and Jungkook reluctantly glanced at each other. Truth be told, you didn’t prefer losing a hand to living with him, you just didn’t like him. Despite being a celebrity, he was a stranger. It just wouldn’t work.
But then, why were you holding your breath, hoping he’d accept?
“We shouldn’t have left Namjoon’s workshop. The marble is about to be delivered,” he said walking away. The air left your lungs in disappointment. It seemed you were to remain a stray cat. Jimin pressed his plump lips apologetically as he gave you enough coins to buy that bread, and you nodded, grateful all the same for his trying. You watched him rush to Jungkook’s side but when this one saw him, he turned around. “Hurry up, brat. If Taehyung gets that block of marble, I’ll not take you in.”
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Since the first day, you could attest to Jeon Jungkook’s nature being as rough and uncouth as the rumours claimed, and after living alone with him for two months still believed gossip such as that he’d got the scar on his left cheek in a tavern fight—in which, if you’d chanced to be present, you would’ve rooted for the other individual.
It appeared it wasn’t just others Jungkook was harsh to. However rich his talent had turned him, he behaved like a poor man, consuming food and drink sparingly and out of necessity instead of pleasure, spending only the money required to live decently, sleeping little in order to work on commissions from dawn to midnight…
Why he chose to take little care of himself was a mystery to someone who previously had not been allowed a choice, even if putting work before all was in order to thwart Kim Taehyung’s plans of ruining his career, as he claimed. You doubted his rival was obsessed with him so, but had learned to agree with whatever Jungkook grumbled to avoid disputes. Most times.
Deep down, you had a feeling your boldness amused him. Who else dared get on his nerves?
“I think all you artists fluttering around the Pope are no more than slaves to money,” you let drop once while making his bed. Bam was sleeping peacefully under the window, while Jungkook leaning against the door’s frame behind you, offended to the core. He could help, you thought, or at least loosen my corset a little…
“I, a slave? I’ll be damned… There is an angel inside every block of marble, and I’ll have you know I carve to set it free.”
“Is it the angel that charges the Pope, then, master?” You could feel him barely restraining the urge to throw you out the window, smiled as you finished smoothing out the blankets.
“You missed a wrinkle there.”
Hands on your hips and frown on your brows, you examined the neatly arranged coverings of his bed. “Where?”
“On your face,” he muttered before making his leave.
Not his finest jibe, but the metaphor did stay with you. An angel inside the marble… It perhaps applied to Jungkook himself, though you’d never tell him.
One instance it came to mind was recently, when his assistants and apprentices were invited over for dinner.
Usually, he’d tell you which meals he liked and you’d ask at the marketplace which ingredients to buy, but now that about ten meals were to be cooked a list was needed. So there he sat on his desk in his study, inking said list as you waited in front of him, fiddling with the undershirt that peeked out of your dress’ sleeves. Given that your eyes were fixed on it, you only learned Jungkook was done when the sound of his quill scratching the paper ceased.
“Be back no later than dusk,” he ordered, “I bet there are still Germans and Spaniards lurking about.”
A year had passed since the Sack of Rome, but the mention of it sent a shiver of fear down your spine. Whatever the political reasons for it, you hated everyone involved, for Hell itself would’ve been a more beautiful sight to behold those nine months when the Tiber’s waters remained painted red…
You were lucky to make it through. Your family wasn’t.
“Yes, master.”
“Here,” he said handing you the paper, then picked another letter from a pile of correspondence he’d been going through before your arrival. Jungkook was about to snap its wax seal when he looked up to realise you hadn’t moved an inch. “Why are you here? Away with you!” He saw the reason in the way you avoided eye contact. “You can’t read, can you?” Met with a silence charged with embarrassment, he leaned back in his chair and sighed, “Give me the list.”
Getting hold of the quill again, Jungkook began… doodling?
You tilted your head but couldn’t see well what he was drawing until he finished and returned the list to you. Then, your lips parted. Each item on the list was illustrated next to its name: ten loaves of bread, a jug of wine, tortellini, four anchovies, two fennel soups…
“I’ll teach you to read when I have time. This will do for now.”
“You’d do that?” For me?
Jungkook ignored you, before he went back to reading his letters complimenting the good gesture with an irritated, “Hurry up.”
That night his co-workers arrived one by one, Jimin the first. The sight of him when you opened the door brightened up your mood.
Unlike a certain someone he was always sweet to you, genuinely interested to know how you fared even if you were just a servant. He claimed that mattered not to him, that you were both commoners and thus equals.
“Look at this place, it’s spotless! And you know I’m furtive, so I won’t get in your way,” you told Jimin as you escorted him through a hallway, bright from the torches hung on the walls that you’d lit up earlier.
He laughed, “I cannot make you my servant, Y/N, you’re maestro’s.”
“But he’s going to drive me mad… To tell you one of many examples, he often falls asleep in his clothes, and who but I is to take his boots off so they don’t get the sheets dirty? If the chalk on his fingers or the dust from the chiseling on his hair won’t already. Bam is far cleaner…”
Jungkook had a workshop he barely set foot in, preferred his team made use of it instead to not be bothered by their idiocy. His words. So it was in a chamber on the ground floor of this house he gave way to artistic insanity. In your book, that meant constant cleaning.
Jimin looked at you fondly. “Sounds nightmarish.”
“It truly is!”
As soon as the two of you entered the dining hall, Bam ran from Jungkook’s side by the fireplace to Jimin, who was as excited to see him.
“Good night, maes–”
“Do you think I’m deaf, ungrateful brat?” Jungkook interrupted him to bark at you. “Rome is full of people begging to get a piece of me, so if you don’t like it here, I’ll just get someone else!”
“You say that and yet keep me like a prisoner!”
“As if you don’t have it better here than anywhere you’ve burdened with your presence before!”
“There, there…” Jimin interjected to de-escalate, kneeling to better stroke Bam. “Maestro, I’ve seen your latest sketch of the Virgin and Child. She resembles Y/N.”
Both you and Jungkook failed to fight off the embarrassment, gazes unable to find a place to settle. Sitting down on the large table, he explained, “It was just one time… I had used Yoongi as a model, but the Madonna looked too masculine... and rather than going through the trouble of finding some girl and hiring her, I had Y/N pose for me… So what! Why bring it up out of nowhere…”
“Because maybe you just need a bit of distance from time to time. With permission, I too would have Y/N pose for m–”
“Absolutely not.”
“Now, why the hell not?” you groaned stamping your foot, startling poor Bam. Hope had been born inside you in a second and cruelly crushed in the next.
“Because I say so. And watch your tone with me.” As usual, the mutual glaring would trick anyone into thinking the next step would be murder. Jimin, who knelt there awkwardly, certainly thought so, at least until the bell rang. “Now go answer the door!”
What happened later, though, rendered the fury Jungkook had evoked in your heart nonexistent and instead seized the thing in a clasp of distress.
In the morning, he walked in when you were sweeping the kitchen. At once you forced the sobs to stop and turned around so he wouldn’t see you wipe your tears.
“It’s past nine, where’s breakfast?” he asked in shock that you hadn’t even started making it, the table there empty.
You swore under your breath before leaving the broomstick leaning against the nearest wall, flushed face kept out of Jungkook’s sight, then in a haste fetched a plate, a knife, and a leftover bread loaf. “Apologies, master, I forgot. I’ll be upstairs in a minute.”
Sniffling betrayed you, at which Jungkook frowned. “Are you crying?”
Great, the question just about especially designed to make one well up. Not trusting your voice anymore, you shook your head. Jungkook approached, but you couldn’t bring yourself to look away from the task at hand, now cutting a few slices of the bread.
“Have you broken something?” You shook your head again, the suppressed sobs making your chin tremble. Jungkook took a deep breath before asking with a surprisingly soothing tone, “Then what’s wrong?”
“You won’t believe me.”
“Try me.”
Within an hour, he’d summoned a meeting consisting of all who’d attended dinner the previous night.
A seemingly calm Jungkook was sat at the head of the table, elbows sunk on it and fingers interlocked. You stood behind him, head still low out of shame. A tense silence had fallen in the chamber some time ago, and sick of it, Jimin shattered it.
“Have you anything to tell us, maestro?”
“I was waiting for Biagio to do so.”
The man was one of Jungkook’s favourite assistants who had worked with him for years, even longer than Jimin. And if it was possible for your position to be trickier, he belonged to some noble family.
“Me? But I’ve nothing to say, maestro.”
Jungkook leaned back in his chair. “My servant will, then. Y/N?”
Bastard. If you are going to fire me, why make me go through this?
“Last night, w-when I left this hall to go refill the wine jug… Messer Biagio followed me into the kitchen, and… h-he trapped me from behind, and started t-to touch me…” Your vision soon blurred, hence why you couldn’t see clearly how concerned Jimin was for you, or how Biagio jumped up in outrage. “I managed to push him away, and ran upst–”
“How dare you slander me, wench? Maestro, you do not believe this!”
“Do I not?”
“She’s lying! I caught her stealing sketches from your study, likely to sell them, so she’s trying to get rid of me!”
You almost scoffed. Only an idiot would choose the one occasion guests had come over and her absence would be noticed to carry out a theft.
Jungkook tilted his head. “I thought you had nothing to say. Why would you keep such a thing just now?”
Biagio gulped. “I deemed it best to mention it later, in private... You won’t believe a pickpocket before an old friend, will you?”
Silence returned, your breath still as you saw all the assistants and apprentices visibly take pity on him. The only one who didn’t was Jimin, but even on his face there was a hint of hesitation. Jungkook’s, you couldn’t see from behind, but after an eternity he stood up and walked over only to put a hand on the shoulder of Biagio, who smiled in relief.
A quiet sob broke through your lips, heart sinking. You’d needed Jungkook to believe you in this. Not because of the consequences his protection as your master could save you from, but because, like it or not… he was the closest thing to family you had.
It turned out he did believe you, judging by the punch landed on Biagio’s jaw out of nowhere. And the next one on his cheekbone, and on his nose. Before everyone around the table had barely stood up to stop Jungkook, he’d already thrown Biagio down and straddled him, pulling his doublet’s collar in a close, tight grip as he continued beating him up. Blood was drawn, but for once, you didn’t mind having to scrub it later.
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Jungkook’s influence trumped a whole noble house’s, you learned in the course of the months Biagio tried his mightiest and failed most miserably to have him arrested. Perhaps because of the Pope sitting on his shoulder.
That he’d taken your side was still hard to believe, all he’d grumbled with a shrug when you thanked him while tending to his wounds from the fight being, “I’d been waiting for the chance. I always thought Biagio was a weasel.”
With the matter resolved, life returned to normal—well, whatever that meant in Jeon Jungkook’s household. Because calling for you at the top of his lungs like a madman was not normal. The first time he’d done it you’d raced downstairs, afraid something horrible had happened, only for him to have you close a window as it was getting chilly. Devil rot him. You rushed no longer after that, much to his complaints.
Today, he didn’t notice right away when you appeared under the cased opening, and good thing he didn’t, for he was polishing a bust with sandpaper… shirtless.
Product of hours carving stone into his desired shape or occasionally beating someone up, he could brag of having muscles, which the current task had covered in a layer of sweat and dust. The way they flexed with each movement had you compelled, wanting to reach out, feel if his skin was as hot as the blood pumping through your veins faster and faster. Then your gaze moved to the bust and whatever spell you were under broke.
Hardly an angel was that widowed noblewoman, whom you wished had stayed trapped inside a block of marble. Her name was Madonna Maddalena, and she’d come some weeks past to make a commission covered in pearls, gold, and boldness.
“My friends refused to accompany me today. You’re said to be… disagreeable, which I’m sure is untrue. However, all of them do want to know if you’re as fine-looking as is also rumoured, maestro” she told Jungkook within minutes of meeting him, still by the entrance!
Now you can tell them he’s not, you bit your tongue before it remarked, as this wasn’t Jimin but a patron not to be scared away by your bickering. It wouldn’t be true anyway. All your master lacked in manners, he made up for with looks… Which you’d never say out loud. You’d never say either that he looked even better when irked.
“I’ve heard many rumours about myself, most of them nonsense. My appearance was involved in none.”
She smiled seductively. “I suppose I’ll have to be the one to spread them.”
“The weather is pleasant today,” Jungkook changed the subject, flustered beneath the formal demeanour. “Shall we have wine in the garden?” You left to prepare it not before catching Maddalena raise her brow at you in disapproval. She must’ve been able to tell you thought she was a pompous cunt.
The beautiful flowers you cared for tried their best outside, but the air didn’t get any better.
Sat around a small table, Maddalena explained she wanted a bust of herself by his talented hand to decorate the main hall of her palazzo. You served them wine, not really listening until Jungkook started playing hard to get. The hundred times you’d told him it wasn’t a good tactic to make his labour out to be too prestigious had apparently fallen on deaf ears.
“Any other artist could carry this out, Madonna. I am working for the Pope these days…” he subtly scolded her, a mere mortal, for wasting his precious time. And he wondered why he had a reputation for being arrogant.
Maddalena put his thoughts into plain words, “So why should you stoop to taking commissions from an insignificant widow?”
“Correct,” you said under your breath, luckily heard by none from the background, where you stood holding a wine jug until the madonna raised her cup and you approached to refill it.
“It is then fortunate I’m to marry a nephew of the Pope’s.”
Swayed by her future influence, Jungkook smiled back. “So it is.”
“But not for another week. ‘Till then, I belong to no man.” The suggestion in her tone almost drove you to spill wine all over her. No, better yet: order Bam to sic on her. He’d do it.
Just, who did this woman think she was? And why did Jungkook not kick her out right afterwards? It made you wonder whether he’d enjoyed the flirtation. Whether he would’ve been the one to take things further had his inconvenient servant not been present. It was common for men to have affairs and lovers, but it didn’t sit well with you that Jungkook might. Not that you ever imagined him doing any of that, for goodness’ sake–
“What took you so long?”
Jungkook’s voice brought you back to the present, under the cased opening.
“I was lazing about, as always,” you quoted his favourite false reprimand, making him roll his eyes, your own dropping to the floor when he walked closer.
“In that case, prepare a bath for me.”
“Yes, master.”
You sighed at all the work ahead. That being a servant was worlds better than living in the streets didn’t mean you looked forward to collecting gallons of water from a well, carrying them back, heating them, transferring them to a tub, then washing Jungkook—because you did wash him.
Biagio had hurt his left shoulder bad and ever since, he’d needed assistance in certain activities. Curious how he could otherwise chisel a goddamned bust without problem.
Jungkook’s full nudity only made you blush if you stopped scrubbing, so knelt with tucked up sleeves before the wooden tub he was reclined on, scrubbing away the dirt on his skin with lavender-scented soap you were. Maybe all the stupid feelings you’d been suffering lately stemmed from there…
Head resting on the edge, he was exhausted from the long day of work, taking your rubbing as a relaxing massage. You, however, couldn’t ignore the stinging guilt, what with the scar on his shoulder right in front of your face. He probably felt your breathing on it.
“I’m sorry you got hurt…”
Jungkook fought heavy lids only to see you avoid him. Allowing yourself to be vulnerable in front of him was embarrassing, as when he’d caught you crying, but he didn’t take advantage of the fact to humiliate you. Jungkook may be an ogre, but he wasn’t cruel.
“I’ve received worse for less,” he assured you in a calm, low voice. It sounded soothing to your ears.
“That, I don’t doubt,” you scoffed, glancing at his other scar on the cheek. “Did you also get that one in defence of some lady?”
“You’re nowhere close to a lady.” It could be done, you mused. Drowning him. “This was courtesy of my brother.”
“You have a brother?” It dawned on you how little you knew of him. Surely, most had heard it all about the divine Jeon Jungkook, but you’d never cared enough to learn past the shell of gossip, even after months of living with him. In fairness, he’d never asked about you either. You preferred it that way.
“Brothers,” he corrected you. “The one who did this to me was a wayward fool. Had to teach him a lesson.”
“Looks like he taught one to you.”
“I left with a scratch, he with a limp.” The conception of two brothers hurting each other so harshly widened your eyes for a second, and Jungkook noticed, for he added, “He was whoring around, wasting the money I worked hard to send, bullying our other brothers as well.”
Much made sense about Jungkook all of a sudden. Not his personality, that was incomprehensible. But why he killed himself to earn money and yet barely spent it… He had a family to provide for. Once again, you were reminded of his metaphor. Could an angel be in there?
Carrying on washing Jungkook, you dragged the sponge over to his neck. Then his collarbones, his chest, his abs just peaking above the water... They did look like a sculpture’s, especially wet and soaped, reminiscent of polished marble when the light of the torches reflected on them. Swallowing hard, the back of your fingers gingerly graced Jungkook’s muscles, both soft and firm. Slippery. Whatever possessed you to keep feeling them, you lacked the will to expel from your body, and so without realising your grip on the sponge loosened until it fell to float away, fingertips now free to roam over his abs.
You were slowly trailing downwards, past the water’s surface, when your wrist was seized and held in the air in a warning manner, the startle almost making you scream.
Sat upright, Jungkook was glaring at you so fiercely you feared for your life. But he didn’t say anything and instead just breathed hard, jaw clenched… almost as if he was holding back. Your rising heartbeat was deafening in the silence waiting for something to happen, anything, but what did wasn’t what a side of you anticipated with excitement.
Jungkook just let go of your wrist and returned to his previous position, and you got hold of the sponge and finished washing him, albeit holding your breath the entire time.
Days later, you came dangerously close to being fired.
The Pope had summoned Jungkook—something about a portrait commission—and you were to carry his bag filled with sketches for him due to his shoulder injury. As you navigated the ever-busy streets of Rome with him, the cold autumn breeze made you regret not putting on an overgown. The cioppa you’d bought with your own salary and not stolen. It brought a smile to your lips that faded at the realisation your mother would’ve reminded you to put it on before going out.
The sorrow pestering you turned to confusion when Jungkook stopped walking and tsked, telling you loud enough to be heard by all, “Look at him, the chief of police, with such an assemblage.”
A well-dressed man and what appeared to be his entourage walked in your direction, halting near enough. You didn’t have to ask to know this was his rival, the renowned painter Kim Taehyung.
“Whereas you, like an executioner, walk alone,” he mocked Jungkook, then noticed you standing behind him like a timid child. “Not completely, my mistake. Maestro, where in your barren soil did you plant such a flower?” He walked over to you, intentionally bumping Jungkook’s wounded shoulder as he passed, causing him to grunt lowly. From up close one was bound to marvel at how handsome Taehyung was, but you didn’t need proximity to tell he was a prick. Miles away, you would’ve known. “Why don’t you come work for me, flower? I’ll make you my muse.”
Jungkook scoffed again, “What, for your horseshit paintings? She’d be a fool to.”
Taehyung turned around to face him, feigning confusion with a smile. “But, maestro, how could they be so if you were once heard saying that all I have in art, I got from you?”
"You naturally have to resort to plagiarising my master’s genius if all you do is horseshit,” you countered, earning surprised looks from every man present, some laughs too, you were proud to say. Jungkook was certainly smirking. Taehyung opened his mouth, but you walked past him uninterested before a response came out of it.
“Good girl,” Jungkook laughed while leaving the crime scene, and for some reason your cheeks burned hot.
The incident happened once inside the Vatican.
Its grandiose corridors alone made you feel small, too unimportant to walk them, whereas Jungkook did so with determination, knowing he belonged at the top of the world. What with your tempestuous relationship, it was easy to forget he was famous throughout Europe. His feet would still never be kissed by you. Someone had to humble the man, right?
At some point the two of you arrived at a door flanked by guards, and averse, you grabbed the sleeve of Jungkook’s doublet.
“Do I have to go in?”
“Too good for the Pope, are you?” He shook you off. “Come on.”
“Damn you…” you muttered.
“What did you just say to me?”
“After you, master.”
Telling himself he’d be late if he scolded you, Jungkook turned and nodded at the guards, who opened the door of a chamber whose walls were frescoed with angels and saints, likely by Taehyung, giving off the impression one was in Heaven. When you saw him sat on a golden chair, old and grey, enjoying the tune of a lute player, you felt as though you’d just entered Hell.
The audience lasted for ever. While you stood by the door, Jungkook showed the Pope some sketches of the portrait for him to choose his favourite and then they talked and talked of politics. All you could do was fix your gaze somewhere on the floor and sigh.
“Yes, Your Holiness, this is the servant I mentioned…” A frown proceeded your looking up to see Jungkook somewhat embarrassed, scratching his nose as if to hide his face. He talked of you to others? Doubtless to complain…
With a sweet voice as if he was talking to a little girl, the Pope asked you, “What is your name?”
“None of your business, Your Holiness.”
The musician’s tune ceased abruptly, allowing Jungkook’s faint gasp to be heard. Then fell a short silence spent by the Pope blinking, taken aback. “I beg your pardon?”
“You heard me.”
Jungkook was quick to fake a laugh, though sweat formed at his temples. “A jest! She meant no offence, Your Holiness, but to make you laugh.”
You held the Pope’s glare in defiance, indifferent to the fact he was the most powerful man in the whole of Christendom.
By some miracle, he let it go, and you left that chamber minutes later with your head as yet attached to your body. Your arm wouldn’t be for much longer, though, given Jungkook was forcibly dragging you all the way out to the streets, pushing you into the first alley he saw.
“Are you out of your mind?!” he shouted, towering over you menacingly. Unlike the day you’d met, you weren’t scared, rather furious as him as you stood your ground. “That was the Pope, you fool!”
“So?”
Jungkook was in utter disbelief. “He could’ve ordered your execution– mine too!”
“Well, nothing happened!”
“Nothing?! I’m sure to fall out of favour!” He paced around, anxiety quickening his breath. “Years of pouring my soul into my craft, of grovelling before the right people, all thrown away! Good God, your attitude may cost me everything…”
“And what about me?! Everything lost to me does not matter?!”
Jungkook stopped to frown. “What the hell are you talking about?”
It was now you who walked up to him. “I didn’t have a job, or a reputation, or admirers. I had only a family, and I never wished for anything else! That monster you work for took them from me. When the foreigners’ armies came and everyone rushed to Castel Sant’Angelo, he gave the order to close the gates as soon as he was safe behind them! You must have been there with him, weren’t you? Well, we weren’t. We were left outside to be slaughtered. And I wish I had been, like my parents, so I didn’t have to suffer the likes of you any longer!”
Tears were streaming down your face by the end, Jungkook just staring back at you. It didn’t surprise him that your parents were dead or that they’d been killed during the Sack, but that it was so deep a wound left festering in your heart that you didn’t mind being put out of misery. He surmised your disrespectful behaviour towards him was also fruit of your pain, especially if you deemed him an ally of the one who caused it.
“The few things I own… They’re wasted on me. Throw them away or give them to your next servant,” you sobbed, taking for granted you were fired. Anyone with half a brain would indeed have you dismissed, and part of you knew it was bound to happen, that you would go back to breaking in fucking churches to spend the night.
So you turned around into the main street, set on wandering until your legs became too sore not to collapse. With any luck, a carriage would run over you. But warmth then surrounded your hand, and you looked down to see Jungkook’s holding it tight enough to force you to halt. Though still mad, a hint of compassion sparkled in his eyes.
“Let’s… Let us just go home.”
Home. His house had felt so for a while now, truth be told. Himself too.
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After that, you non-verbally agreed on a ceasefire—avoiding quarrels, that is, which was quite the task for both.
Such as now that Jungkook had you inking down a letter in his name. First of all, did you look like a scribe? If you’d known in advance the lazy arse would teach you to read and write for this, you’d have chosen to remain illiterate. And second, this was your short break before making dinner, intended to be spent playing with Bam. The poor thing was also in the study, at least being stroked by his owner, who was sat beside you on the desk.
“… I send you my regards, may God keep you from all harm. Jeon Jungkook in Rome,” he finally finished dictating, and you recording. “Give it to me, I’ll seal it.”
He was melting the wax with which to do so when the bell rang, to his surprise. Sighing, you stood up and went to open the door to whom turned out to be Jimin. The sight of him brightened you up, and yours stretched his lips into a smile.
“Evening, Y/N.”
“Good evening! I didn’t know the master was expecting you.”
“He isn’t…” You welcomed him in, brows joining at how he continuously chewed on his aforementioned lip and breathed deep through his nose as he followed you. Had something happened…? A decision to eavesdrop was made en route to the study.
Though Jimin requested for you to stay once there, and nothing could have prepared you for the reason why.
“This actually concerns Y/N…” You and Jungkook exchanged confused looks, him leaning against the desk and crossing arms as though he didn’t like the sound of that. Jimin fixed his already perfect clothes before addressing him, “I’ve come to ask for her hand in marriage.” Your jaw dropped. “I know it’s sudden at the lack of previous courtship, but I thought I should ask for your permission before engaging in it, maestro. She’s a lovely girl… and I think she’d be happy as my wife. Worry not, I won’t ask for a dowry or for her to stop working… Although on second thought, fewer hours of service would be ideal.”
This wasn’t real. It couldn’t be happening.
Jungkook must be thinking the same, for he squinted to ask, “Are you drunk?”
“N-No, of course not.”
“Are you sure? You want to marry a servant with little to her name.” He had a point, so you weren’t offended. If politics weren’t the reason for a union, did this mean… Jimin had feelings for you?
“Maestro, you say it as if I were a lord,” he chuckled. “I don’t care about Y/N’s possessions, I’ll provide for her anyway. I’ve… always been fond of her. And I dare say she shares the sentiment.”
Betrayal hid safely behind a look that asked if there was any truth to that. Obviously not! There was no romance in your own fondness for Jimin. If anything, you had thought he saw you as a younger sister to look after, therefore as a protective older brother you saw him. But so shocked were you still that no words managed to come out, and Jungkook’s gaze shifted back to Jimin.
“I’ll think about it. You may go.”
A curt tone was the norm for Jungkook, it was not being granted his blessing that disappointed Jimin. He knew for a fact he was an honourable man, so why wouldn't he entrust you to him?
“Quite well… I’ll show myself out.” he uttered, before making his leave failing to hide his low spirit by giving you one last shy smile you hadn’t the heart to return.
An awkward silence filled the air that even Bam daren’t break. Only once the front door was heard shutting did you walk closer to Jungkook.
“You won’t agree to this, will you?”
“Why shouldn’t I? I have to get rid of you at some point.”
“Rid of me? Like I’m a burden?” you asked, voice rising. How a servant could be so was unknown to you until, like wooden ship toys did when you’d submerge them in a bucket of water as a child, certain guesses surfaced in your thoughts. Trying to pickpocket him, the constant clashing, Biagio, that bath, the Pope… Yes, you may perhaps be described as a burden. But you didn’t want to leave. With a calmer tone, you pleaded, “I’ll behave from now on. I won’t cause any more trouble, I swear.”
Jungkook didn’t deign to look your way as he left, followed by Bam. “You have to marry at some point, Y/N. Otherwise people will gossip.”
Since when did he care about what people said of him? And why should you?
Winter having dropped its anchor, nightfall arrived early. Not early enough, you brooded as you cooked dinner, longing for the day to end once and for all. With any hope, all of this was a nightmare and upon waking up in the morning life would go back to normal. You didn’t even know why you wanted to stay with Jungkook, as the occasions in which you’d begged Jimin to employ you to leave this house were countless. The only certain thing was that you were upset.
Later, after washing all plates and cups, you began to put off all torches lighting the house, finding out in the hall that Jungkook hadn’t moved from the seat he’d dined in. You considered carrying on with your job and leaving him in the dark, but he wouldn’t find it as funny. Instead, you stood before him.
“Will that be all, master?”
The coldness in your expression made him sigh, “Y/N–”
“I shall retire, then.” You turned to leave but were made to stop in your tracks.
“It’s an advantageous proposal for you,” he lectured to whom he must believe an idiot. “Jimin works for me, he’s wealthy. A better match than you could ever aspire to. And he asks for no dowry because he doesn’t want money, he wants you…” His words were tainted with resentment. “He’ll take good care of you.”
Skirt of your dress swirling along, you faked a smile. “If you think so, master, then it must be so.”
He shook his head as he leaned back in defeat. “Suit yourself, but I won’t be the one to reject Jimin. You crush his heart.”
A laugh escaped you. “If you genuinely cared about him, you wouldn’t let him marry a woman in love with–” Oh no. It only hit you as you were saying it.
Jungkook had appeared annoyed, but now he was mad. “Who?” He stood up abruptly—chair’s feet scratching against the floor making you wince—and walked so close you were backed against the wall, face forced to turn to a side. In a low, deep voice, he repeated, less as a question and more as an order this time, “Who.”
There was no way in the nine circles of Hell you’d say it, when you didn’t want to believe it in the first place. For fuck’s sake, why? Jungkook only ever made you want to get away from him. That was the case right now, but then… why were your feet frozen?
Some unreasonable part of you seemed to have prevailed upon the others, casting away all resistance from your body and allowing yourself to indulge in Jungkook’s proximity. You met his eyes without fear, held his dark gaze. It didn’t take him long to work it out, yet he kept close, so close your unsteady breaths mingled, the effect akin to intoxication. He was visibly trying to hold back, telling himself it’d be a bad idea, but you prayed he wouldn’t care.
By God or the Devil, your prayers were heard.
Jungkook finally smashed his lips into yours, devouring them with a hunger you shared and felt growing as he gripped your waist to press you against him. A minute ago, you wouldn’t have imagined his tongue belonged inside your mouth, swirling around your own, and now you wanted it all over your body. As if reading your mind, Jungkook broke the ardent kiss to move down to your neck, which he licked painfully slowly before sucking hard, making you hiss with pleasure. He knew that would leave a mark, the bastard. You wondered if it was meant for Jimin, so he’d see you were Jungkook’s, and in such case you didn’t mind, let your eyelids close to enjoy it.
Steered by the lust possessing you, one hand grabbed his soft hair in a fistful, keeping his head in place where he was sweetly abusing your neck, while the other travelled southwards until it reached his crotch and held it over the trousers, feeling his cock stiffen. Jungkook groaned—a vibration to your skin—in retaliation lifting your skirt. You’d thought he'd take his time, tease you, but after ensuring you were wet enough by gliding his middle finger along your core, he slid it inside and began making beckoning motions.
“Master…” you moaned, legs shaking. Jungkook forsook your neck to pull back, watch how you struggled to keep it together as he added another finger, curling and uncurling them both, hitting all the right places, and unwilling to give him that satisfaction without consequences you groped his erection with the same vigour. Although he was in good control of his expression, his breath quivered against your lips, so he kissed them again, biting hard into your lower one.
He exhaled, “You’re driving me to sin…”
Indeed, the same fingers that held the brushes when he painted religious artwork were buried deep inside your cunt, bringing you the most sinful ecstasy. It made you chuckle. Jungkook took that as the mockery it was and, crossed, pulled his fingers out of you to drag you by the arm to the edge of the table, where he had you sit. Without delay he lifted your skirt again, only this time he also pulled down his trousers to reveal his cock, thick and throbbing, which he pumped as he watched you spread your legs eagerly, ready to take all of him.
With his free hand Jungkook cupped your cheek, thumb caressing your lower lip, coated with saliva and reddened still from when he’d bit it. He could sense your desire, that you craved him inside, had for a while. Desperately. And however much tempted he was to make you beg for it, his own arousal led his cock to your entrance and eased it inside already, another groan hitting the back of his bared teeth. You didn’t have time to gasp, his thrusts so quick they earned only moans, so wonderful did it feel.
Jungkook’s hand on your cheek then wrapped around your neck. “Do you know how often I’ve fantasised strangling you?”
You chuckled again as you slapped him across the face. Jungkook halted his movements in shock, glared at you. “And I slapping you?”
It took him a moment, but he scoffed and pushed you back so that you were lying down, climbing next atop you, confident that the wooden table was sturdy enough to hold both. So legs hooked around his torso and arms around his neck, you welcomed his thrusts, rough enough to make your eyes water. But it felt heavenly, how he ravished you... The mutual irritation and tension building up for over half a year translated into indescribable pleasure.
He kissed you again, flicking his tongue against yours as he pounded into you without mercy. Overwhelmed by the sensation, all you could do to express you were nearing your limit was sink your nails into Jungkook’s biceps at each side of you, moan inside his mouth. He took the hint and fucked you as fast as his body would allow, within mere seconds your walls clenching tight around him. The sight of you collapsing under him, overcome with bliss, made him reach his own highest shortly, spurting his warm seed inside you.
As his movements gradually ceased, so did your panting. Before a complete silence fell, you asked, “Am I still to marry Jimin?”
Jungkook grabbed your face and growled against your pouted lips, “You’re not going anywhere.”
5K notes · View notes
punkshort · 2 months
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Thank you Anon for this request!
A Deeper Purpose
Pairing: Joel Miller x f!reader one-shot
Summary: Living in Jackson during the apocalypse doesn't do anything to curb your desire to have a child. The problem is, most of the men in town are unavailable... except for one.
Warnings: smut (18+ MDNI), unprotected piv sex, breeding kink (given the request, obv), language, friends to lovers, mentions of anxiety, infertility, pregnancy, angst, pining, alcohol
WC: 3.4K
dividers by @saradika-graphics
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When you first asked him, he thought you were crazy.
He stared at you in complete disbelief, his gaze flickering down to the drink in your hand, trying to recall how many you had to propose something so insane. But it was only one.
"Are you fuckin' serious?"
"Mhmm," you said confidently. "I've thought about it for a long time. I want a baby and the men in this town are either taken or have the mental fortitude of a child," you joked nervously. "You're neither of those things. Besides... I trust you."
His eyes softened for a moment and he dropped his gaze to the table. You had known Joel for the better part of five years, and while at first he was brash and gruff, throughout countless patrols and fights against infected where you had to have each other's backs, you had grown rather close. Neither of you ever crossed the line past friendship, and you had never even thought about it until recently when your anxiety was keeping you up late at night, wondering if you would ever find a man and settle down to start a family.
It was a luxury in this life, to be sure. The population of Jackson wasn't very large, but in five years you had come to get a good read on most of its citizens. And you kept coming back to the same conclusion: the man for you was not there.
So after much thought and self-reflection, you worked up enough courage to get a drink with Joel after your route and ask him if he would be willing to give you a baby.
You followed up by telling him you would be solely responsible, that you would do all the work and he could be as involved in the child's life as much as he wanted to be, if at all, while he sat there dumbstruck.
Now he cleared his throat and scratched the back of his neck nervously as he weighed your proposal.
"Can I think 'bout it?" he finally asked.
"Oh, god, of course!" you exclaimed, eyes widening in surprise that he was considering it at all. "However much time you need."
But that was almost a month ago. Each day that passed you became more anxious, more impatient, and it was beginning to sour your mood.
On that particular day you were checking out the park rangers outpost hidden deep within the Wyoming forest. The building was up within the trees, providing the park rangers in the past a bird's eye view of the forest, and now it gives Jackson the same.
Joel was scribbling something in the log book while you strolled aimlessly around the cabin, opening and shutting drawers loudly, already knowing what was in them but just looking for something to do.
"Somethin' on your mind?" he mumbled over his shoulder, his focus still on the book.
"No," you said defensively, but when you angrily began to struggle with a window that refused to open, it became clear you were lying.
"Here, lemme help," he offered, dropping the pencil and walking to your side of the room.
"I'm fine, I don't need your help," you snapped, though you obviously did.
His hands gripped your shoulders and forcibly moved you out of the way before he took hold of the window and gave it a quick jerk, loosening the window in it's frame and finally allowing fresh air in.
He smirked at you and you rolled your eyes before breezing past him.
"This attitude 'bout the window or 'bout what you asked me?" he challenged, stopping you dead in your tracks. Slowly, you spun around, unsure what to say.
"The window," you finally answered, then shifted your weight and shrugged. "Okay, maybe a little of both."
"Mhmm," he said, advancing toward you. "Thought so."
"Well... have you thought about it or are you just trying to come up with a nice way to say no?"
He frowned and propped his hands on his hips. "Now why d'you think it's a no?"
"Because you haven't said a single word about it in a month," you told him like the answer was obvious.
"Well maybe the answer's yes but I don't know how to casually bring up into polite conversation that I'm ready to knock up my goddamn friend!" he argued.
You stared at him, jaw hanging open in disbelief.
"Wait, really?" you whispered.
He nodded and scrubbed his palms over his face. "Yeah, I mean... if you still wanna or... whatever," he grumbled.
The first time was bad, to put it mildly. Your kisses were all teeth, chins and noses bumped together awkwardly. You had hoped once you got down to it that it would have gotten better, but you were wrong. Your rhythms were all off, you hit your head on the end table, and Joel nearly fell off the couch at one point. Needless to say, you didn't come. It was a miracle he did by the end of it.
Afterwards, you both sat there, catching your breaths and wondering if you made a huge mistake.
No, it wasn't a mistake. It was always a means to an end. Ultimately, it didn't really matter if the sex was good or not, the end result would be the same.
Still...
"I'm not usually that bad," you finally said, breaking the thick silence. He groaned and tipped his head back to rest on the couch.
"Me either. I swear, I ain't lyin'. I never usually..." he trailed off, rubbing his chin, deep in thought. "We'll try again. Back home. In a bed. That's the problem. It's gotta be, right?"
"Yeah," you nodded, not fully believing him but at that point, what could it hurt?
The next time was the following day at your home. It was a little better than the first time, but not by much.
"It doesn't matter, Joel," you assured him, tugging your blanket over your chest.
"Matters to me," he said defensively. "I'm too in my head or somethin'. It's still weird, don't you think?"
"Yeah, it's weird," you agreed.
"It's too planned out. Maybe it's gotta be more natural. More... spontaneous."
"Yeah," you agreed.
A couple evenings later one of the other men on patrol was having a bonfire at his home and invited a handful of others, you and Joel included.
Ten or so people sat around a roaring fire, tossing back whiskey and playing cards or swapping war stories. The alcohol made you feel warm and relaxed, your limbs as loose as your tongue when you joked around with the others, joining in on the teasing when a seasoned patrolman admitted to shooting off a crossbow at a leaf that fell just a little too loudly in the woods.
Then you felt a hand on the small of your back and you turned, your eyes glassy and face warm from the booze and the laughs. Joel stood beside you looking just as at ease as you and he gave you a knowing look.
For once, you were on the same page. Neither of you said a word.
You made your excuses, said your goodbyes, and slipped into the night. It was quiet, the rest of the town asleep, so it was easy to hear Joel's voice carry over the wind a few minutes later when he announced his departure, your heart skipping an excited beat in your chest.
He didn't hurry to catch up with you and you were glad. It helped. The anticipation built up on the walk home, and for the first time you felt a warmth bloom between your legs. Your fingers shakily worked your front door when you heard his steps growing closer, the crunching of gravel growing louder and louder until your door swung open and the squeak of old wood under his boots as he walked up your stairs echoed in your ears.
You didn't bother to turn the lights on. His hands were on your waist instantly, kicking the door closed behind him as his mouth crashed against yours with a groan. All you could hear was your shared breath and the rustling of fabric, each of you working to strip the other of their clothes as quickly as possible.
Maybe it was the alcohol, or maybe it was the spontaneity of it. Whatever it was, it was better. Oh, so much better.
Somehow you had made it to your bed and you had never been more grateful to have a small ranch home in your life. When he first pushed inside, you moaned and arched your back off the mattress and his teeth gently grazed your collarbone, sending a wave of goosebumps over your skin. Instantly, you found a rhythm. Your hips rolled to meet his at the perfect time, his hands squeezed and pinched your breasts while his tongue invaded your mouth, only sliding down to cup your ass when he sensed it was becoming too much.
"More," you moaned into his mouth, heels digging into the backs of his thighs. He alternated between snapping and grinding his hips, the mix of sensations quickly bringing you over the edge.
You could feel the excitement in his body when he finally made you come. Like he was reenergized and focused, like he had finally accomplished what he set out to do.
"Come for me, Joel," you whispered in his ear before nipping at his earlobe. You could tell he was close by the way his muscles tensed and the deep groans emanating from his chest.
"Yeah? Want me to come in this tight little pussy?" he growled, the dirty talk sending a jolt of surprise through you. Before, he had been so quiet. This was new.
"Yeah," you whispered back, "want you to fuck a baby in me. I want everyone to see what you did to me."
He groaned so loudly you wondered if it could be heard from outside. His teeth sunk down into your shoulder when he came, muffled words being spoken into your skin as he shot thick ropes of his seed deep into your womb, only slowing when his legs began to shake and he collapsed on top of you with a huff.
"Fuck," he gasped, still trying to catch his breath on top of you. "That was..." he trailed off with a chuckle and you felt him swallow tightly. "That was much better."
"Yeah," you whispered, your eyes sliding shut as your fingers gently raked through his hair. You didn't even realize you were doing it or how intimate it seemed considering your arrangement, but he didn't seem to mind. In fact, he leaned into it a bit as he waited for his heartrate to slow.
Once he collected himself, he propped himself up on his hands and slowly eased out of you with a hiss.
"Can you hand me-"
"Yeah," he said, already knowing you were asking for the small, firm pillow you used last time to prop your hips up, and gave it to you. With a groan, he got to his feet and went to your bathroom while you tucked your knees against your chest, hoping you were getting the angle right.
When he emerged from the bathroom, he handed you a wet washcloth to use when you were done, then began to dress.
He glanced at your face, then your hips propped up in the air.
"You need anythin' else?"
"No, I think this'll do," you joked, and he chuckled before he stood.
"Alright then. See you tomorrow?"
"Yep," you said with a smile, then watched him as he left your bedroom and listened while he slid his boots back on and quietly shut the door behind him, leaving you all alone.
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"Fuck, it better work this time," you muttered as you bounced up and down on Joel's lap, your hands digging into his shoulders for support as you slid up and down on his cock. His hands held your waist, guiding you while you rode him on his couch, his eyes transfixed on where you were connected.
"Gotta relax. I told you, it ain't gonna work if you stress yourself out," he replied, eyes still glued to the way his cock emerged from your clutch even wetter than before.
"It's been six months, Joel," you whined, but he shushed you by slanting his mouth over yours. He didn't want to admit it, but he didn't mind when you came to him each month with a look of dejection when your efforts inevitably failed. He felt bad for you, don't get him wrong, but he had grown very fond of the one week every month you found yourself wrapped around his cock.
His thumb found your clit and he felt you tense and your mind went blank. Perfect.
"'S'right," he murmured, watching your face go slack, "just turn off that pretty little head of yours for a minute and lemme take care of you."
You nodded, eyes sliding shut as your hips began to work faster, rolling and grinding down on him until your nails dug into his skin and you cried out his name. Fuck, he loved hearing that. It didn't take much more for him to come, his hands gripping your sides so tight, he was afraid he might leave bruises as he thrusted up into you, giving you every last drop of his release.
"Goddamn," he whispered, head falling back onto the couch as he panted for air.
"Shit," you gasped, voice a little cracked. "Shoulda finished with me laying down. It's gonna leak out when -"
Without a word, he wrapped his arms around you and, still plugging you with his cock, twisted around so you were laying flat on the couch and he was hovering above you.
"Better?"
"Much," you giggled, playing with a stray curl over his ear. You gazed warmly at one another, neither of you saying a word as your pulse slowed and his cock softened.
"Thank you for doing this for me, Joel," you whispered, your eyes drifting all over his face, taking in every little detail.
He nodded and swallowed then forced himself to look away. If he didn't, he was worried you would see too much.
He slid out of you and grabbed a pillow, handing it to you blindly before standing and strolling to his bathroom. After he cleaned up, he leaned over his sink, hands curled around the cracked vanity, and stared at his reflection in the mirror with a pit in his stomach.
How did he let this happen?
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He should have known. The morning before you came over, he had a bad feeling. Like something had shifted in the air, something had changed without his permission and it left an empty feeling in his chest.
The overly excited knock on his door as he sipped his coffee almost made him want to pretend he wasn't home, that you weren't about to bounce into his kitchen holding two white sticks with a huge grin plastered across your face. But he didn't, and you did.
Either he really sold his reaction to your news well or you were too elated to notice his heart being ripped from his chest.
It was over. You were pregnant, and you no longer needed him. You would no longer come by every month and keep his bed warm. You would no longer share breakfast with him or talk to him about the books you were reading. He would go back to being utterly and completely alone.
It took a good month or two, but he adjusted back to his normal life. You still did patrol runs with him, which he protested, but when you finally began to show around five months, you agreed to stop and found a different job in town, instead.
That made his chest crack back open. Now he hardly ever saw you. It was bad enough he didn't get to be with you, taste you, fuck you anymore, but now he didn't even get to hear your voice. Occasionally he would see you in the dining hall or in the street and you would always talk to him, but it wasn't the same. Meanwhile, you walked around Jackson with his child growing in your belly, your shirts straining against the swell of your womb, the life he put inside you blooming before everyone's eyes. And all he wanted to do was claim you, right there in the center of town for everyone to see. For everyone to look in awe at what the two of you had created together.
One evening he was sitting alone in front of his fire, sipping whiskey and staring blankly into the flames. He had a decent life, considering the circumstances. So why couldn't he just be happy?
Then a rap came at his door. Urgent and loud. He placed his tumbler down and quickly went to open it, surprised to find you waiting on the other side.
"Hey," you said breathlessly, one hand over your round stomach. His eyes dropped down to take you in before he met your gaze again.
"Are you alright?"
"Yeah," you replied with a look on your face that told him you didn't realize he would obviously panic about your wellbeing at this point in your pregnancy. "Sorry, I just - can I come in?"
"Yeah, 'course," he said, stepping aside to open the door wider. You toed off your boots and shrugged off your jacket, allowing him to take it from you and hang it up before you wandered into his living room. Your eyes fell on his abandoned glass and you smiled.
"I miss drinking," you said longingly. He grinned and, leaving the whiskey where it was so as not to tempt you, sat on the couch.
"What're you doin' here so late? Is the baby okay?"
"Yeah," you nodded, tearing your eyes away from the glass and sitting down near him on the sofa. "Baby's good. I just was thinking about you and I wanted to see you."
He perked up at that, he couldn't help himself. "Oh, yeah?"
You grinned and bit your lip shyly before looking away. "I miss you, I guess."
A smile spread wide across his face. "Aw, how sweet."
You swatted an arm out to smack him on the shoulder and he laughed, his heart finally feeling like it was mending a bit.
"Jerk," you muttered, and he laughed again.
"I missed you, too," he finally admitted, his cheeks rosy from the fire and the whiskey as he gazed at you, the reflection from the flames making your skin glow. Maybe it was that pregnancy glow that everyone used to talk about. Or maybe you always glowed and he just never allowed himself to notice until it was too late.
He watched your throat work, swallowing dryly while your fingers fidgeted in your lap and he realized you were nervous.
"What if I told you I missed you as more than just friends?" you whispered, your eyes pinned to the floor, unwilling or unable to meet his gaze.
His breath caught in his throat. Surely, he must have misheard you. But then you finally turned to look at him, tears welling in your eyes, and his heart lurched in his chest.
"What if I told you I'm in love with you?" he bravely whispered back.
Your eyebrows pinched together and your face crumpled before you reached forward, curling your arms around his neck and pulling him close, your lips pressing together earnestly before opening your mouth and letting his tongue lick behind your teeth.
He wasn't sure how you both made it upstairs and into his bed. He couldn't remember peeling your clothes off, one by one, revealing more and more of your changing body to him for the first time. But he did remember seeing your bare, swollen belly underneath him while his hand slowly slid across your skin in wonder. And then he felt it. A little flutter. A little jolt. And he looked up at you in surprise.
"She's kicking," you explained, and his eyes fell back to your stomach.
"She?"
You nodded, placing your hand over his lovingly. "I think it's a girl."
He smiled as tears began to cloud his vision, then bent forward to press a kiss against your stomach, letting his lips linger so hopefully his unborn daughter could feel him there and feel the love he had for her.
You had to pull him away by his shoulders, the both of you laughing softly, unable to believe how much things had changed in just a year.
Because not only were you a couple months away from finally being a mother, but you also realized you were very, very wrong all those months ago.
The man for you was, in fact, right there all along.
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2K notes · View notes
oddinary4bts · 5 months
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Chasing Cars | Masterpost (jjk)
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☆summary: when your brother goes to study on a semester abroad, your life collides with his best friend Jeon Jungkook, who's coincidentally your roommate. Will you survive the collision, or will you crumble into dust?
☆status: on-going (next update: August 30, 2024)
☆pairings: brother's best friend!Jungkook x younger sister!female reader, Hoseok x female reader, Namjoon x OC, Jin x OC, Jimin x OC, Taehyung x OC and others.
☆rating: 18+ (minors DNI, some chapters have mature content)
☆genre: forbidden love?au, college!au, slice of life!au, smut, angst (as usual a lot of it), fluff
☆total word count: 218.5k (lmao my fingers slipped)
☆a/n: I got the idea for this fic just a little over a year ago, following a power outage that lasted for a few days where I live and Jungkook's live where he kept coming back with different outfits (the white dress shirt hit me right in the gut). It took me a long time to write, as I was working on multiple other projects at the same time, but I am so so happy to be ready to share this baby with you guys <3
☆Thank you to @moonleeai and @jessikahathaway for beta-ing this monster <3 (and for all your encouragement and support)
☆And a special thank you to @wintaerbaer and @btsborahaee for encouraging me and supporting me whenever I screamed to you about this fic
☆add yourself to the taglist here!
☆discord server link here!
☆☆☆☆☆
If I lay here If I just lay here Would you lie with me and just forget the world?
Chasing Cars, Snow Patrol
☆☆☆☆☆
➳Teaser (Jungkook pov): the day he met you (1.1k)
You fucking touch her, you're dead.
➳Chapter one: when the Incident happens (11.8k)
Jungkook is Tae's best friend.
➳Chapter two: when Jungkook teases you (10.2k)
You know I hate that nickname.
➳Chapter three: when Valentine's Day happens (13.1k)
You know, Taehyung doesn’t have to know everything.
➳Chapter four: when you and Jeon Jungkook clash (9.5k)
I was just going to say that we should keep this between us.
➳Chapter five: when you have to go back to reality (12.1k)
We just pretend nothing happened, no?
➳Chapter six: when Jungkook hosts his friends over (9.6k)
I really want to kiss you right now.
➳Chapter seven: when doubt makes you question everything (15k)
Why do you want to believe the worst of me so bad?
➳Chapter eight: when secrets are unveiled in New York (13.5k)
I want you.
➳Chapter nine: when a party makes Jungkook jealous (11.2k)
You make me insane.
➳Chapter ten: when time slips through your fingers (10.1k)
I don’t want to lose you, peach.
➳Chapter eleven: when Jungkook visits Taehyung in Paris (8.4k)
Can’t wait for you to be back.
➳Chapter twelve: when it breaks (7.3k)
I can’t be with you.
➳Chapter thirteen: when it's too late (8.9k)
I have to talk to him.
➳Chapter fourteen: when the truth comes out (12.2k)
We never told each other how we felt.
➳Chapter fifteen: when you find your way back to Jungkook (7.4k)
You came?
➳Chapter sixteen: when Jungkook takes you out on a date (8.9k)
I think I was waiting for you my whole life.
➳Chapter seventeen: when forever awaits you (9k)
Getting to love you is the most beautiful thing that’s ever happened to me.
Drabbles in Jungkook's pov (might add more as the story goes on)
➳Chapter 1.5: the first party (1.6k)
Then why are you bringing him home, peach?
➳Chapter 3.5: Valentine's Day (1.1k)
We should have hung out like this before.
➳Chapter 4.5: a walk through campus (852)
You love it, peach.
➳Chapter 5.5: the return to reality (2k)
You wanted to talk?
➳Chapter 6.5: hosting his friends at the apartment (4.4k)
What the fuck is wrong with you?
➳Chapter 7.5: when he realizes (2.5k)
Isn't she Taehyung's sister?
➳Chapter 8.5: the engagement party (6.6k)
Have fun while it lasts.
➳Chapter 9.5: jealous jungkook (3k)
Shouldn’t I prove to you that you’ve got nothing to worry about?
➳Chapter 10.5: the morning before Paris (1.7k)
I promise I'll come back to you and make it work.
➳Chapter 11.5: the kiss (1.2k)
Just this once.
➳Chapter 12.5: after losing you (4.6k)
Fuck, fuck, fuck.
➳Chapter 13.5: returning home (4k)
What am I supposed to do?
➳ Chapter 14.5: losing you again (3k)
I can't believe you've been wearing the necklace
➳Chapter 15.5: a conversation with Taehyung, and his reunion with you (2.6k)
It’s never been like that with her.
☆☆☆☆☆
All rights reserved to @/oddinary4bts, 2024. Do not copy, repost or translate.
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Note
Azriel with single mom reader? I feel like being a single mom in ACOTAR would be tricky as hell... reader comes from autumn court and flees to night court because she got pregnant out of marriage? 😯 the shame
Pairing: Azriel x Reader
Word count: ~950
Warnings: Nothing yet, maybe just a little angst
a/n: Okay I know this is a drabble but this is definitely getting more parts like I am attached to this storyline now and LOVE that you requested it 🤗
Read part two here
____________________________________________
You leaned against a pillar just outside the school, a twitch creeping up your hands until your fingers spasmed. You shoved them under the bend of your elbows, crossing your arms and biting into your lip. 
She was fine. 
She was more than fine—Velaris was safe. 
Anything would have been safer than facing your father’s wrath back in Autumn, but you had gotten extremely lucky with the timing of your escape. Falling pregnant with your daughter had not been in the cards, especially not after a single night of rebellion, but with Velaris’s doors opening up just days after your healer broke the news, something seemed to be written in the stars. 
But every day was still a gamble; your father could find you at any time. 
The past five years had been a miracle, if you were being honest. 
School was supposed to end two minutes ago. 
Your foot began to shake, popping your knee up and down and making your body vibrate with the anxiety that consumed you. 
You shouldn’t have let her go to school. 
Melanie only had a few friends—neighbor kids whose parents you had vetted extensively—but that had been enough for her to get the idea into her head. You had planned on homeschooling her, or at least waiting until she was a few years older before letting her out into the world. Unfortunately, that had not been Melanie’s plan, and Melanie had so many wonderful plans. As most five-year-olds did. 
Gods, what if—
“First day?” a rumbling voice made you pause your nervous fidgeting. The man spoke again. “If you’re worried, don’t be. The teacher is great. Just forgetful when it comes to time. They are typically a few minutes late every day.” 
You swallowed and turned around despite every voice in your head telling you not to. But those voices in your head were completely and utterly wrong about a multitude of things. Behind you, you found a man—an Illyrian—with wings an ungodly size and shadows swirling down his legs and onto a uniform pool along the ground. And he was gorgeous—unabashedly gorgeous in the most devastating way. 
You looked up from your blatant investigation of him, meeting his eye and stuttering out, “Oh. That’s… that’s good to know. Thank you.” 
If he noticed your stutter, he didn’t make any sign of it. Instead, the man with the wings and the shadows blinked several times, furrowed his brows, and took a step back as if to steady himself. Perhaps, if you weren’t a bundle of unreasonable nervous energy, you would have found his actions strange, but you were. So you simply offered him a superficial, airy laugh and uncrossed your arms. 
“I—” the man began, but he seemed to lose his train of thought, a heat traveling up his cheeks in a way that looked foreign. “I’m Azriel.” 
Oh, wonderful. Introductions. 
You tried your hardest to stay very far away from very many people. It was the best way to keep yourself hidden. You couldn’t avoid the neighbors, and you supposed you couldn’t avoid fae like Melanie’s teacher, but this was different. 
Shit. 
You offered your name, anyway, afraid of appearing too outlandish in an otherwise casual setting. 
It would be fine. 
This was fine. 
Azriel repeated it in a breathless way, but then the school bell rang and something seemed to click in his brain. The small smile that had curled up the corner of his mouth became hard and he shot his eyes quickly one way and then the other, inspecting your surroundings. 
Maybe this wasn’t fine. 
“Are you a new mom in the area?” Azriel asked. 
All of your nerves shifted to guarded unease. “I am,” you offered, not caring if it was almost a lie. 
“The moms here don’t usually do the pick ups alone.” 
“You’re doing a pick up alone, it seems.” 
“I’m picking up my nephew,” Azriel explained, relaxing his posture, making himself smaller, seemingly gauging the building tension. “I didn’t mean to come across—I just asked because the mothers here typically have help. From their mates or partners. From the father.” 
You bit the inside of your cheek, your next words tumbling out before you could catch them. “Well, I’m alone.” 
Double shit. 
Azriel seemed to let out a breath, his shadows whipping around along the ground. 
You braced yourself for further questioning, for the judgments that would surely follow, but then you were attacked from behind by a pair of arms wrapping around your knees. You turned quickly, scooping your daughter into a hug and promptly dismissing any further conversation with the stranger. 
“Hi, Mel,” you smiled, tucking her hair back as you subtly looked her over. “How was school? Did you like it?” 
“I loved it!” she excitedly replied. She rambled on a bit more after that, retelling her day by the minute. 
You felt eyes on you the entire time. A small boy had run and jumped into Azriel’s arms in your peripheral, but even as the boy talked and talked just as Melanie did, you felt the occasional glance your way. And some of Azriel’s shadows had to be reigned in multiple times, the small wisps licking at your ankles. 
The teacher suddenly spoke up and you were eavesdropping, straining your ears to listen in on her greeting towards the Illyrian.
“Oh, Azriel, lovely to see you. We were hoping the High Lady would be picking Nyx up, but this is even better. There is a showcase in a few weeks that—” 
You felt your world freeze. 
High Lady. 
You had been speaking to someone in close relation to the Night Court. You let someone know your name, told them you were alone with a child, and they had direct access to the High Lord and Lady. 
You whisked Melanie into your arms despite her protests and beelined it home. 
Shit. 
part two
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textmel8r · 3 months
Text
[ DRABBLE ] 𝐒𝐔𝐆𝐀𝐑 𝐁𝐀𝐁𝐘 ! ( ninth installment ) in which you find toji fushiguro’s number off a sugar baby site .
୨୧˚ part; one. two. three. four. five. six. seven. eight. nine. ten. eleven.
୨୧˚ incl; toji fushiguro
୨୧˚ cw; sugar mommy! reader , sugar baby! toji , mentions of sex , profanity , crying , angst
୨୧˚ an; does anyone even care about this anymore LMDOAOO but for real, i’m sorry for how late this part got out. i am battling severe writers block it is dangling me by the BAWLLSSS,, im thinking that this series is coming to a close soon and i never meant for it to get this deep but here we are 🦝 thank you all for being so patient with me i lob you
୨୧˚ join my discord server ! we share headcanons, fanfic recs, color roles, and more drooling emoji
There was something about thunderstorms that Toji always felt drawn to. They were great; overbearing in a way, rolling through and burying a perfectly fine day under gallons of rainwater and gray skies. Authoritative, condemning humans to take shelter lest they wish to drown in its fruits. Suffering the consequences; soaked-through clothes and sopping hair. He watches the pane of glass at the roof, a skylight barred into the flat of your high rise ceilings. The rain storm had reduced it into nothing but a drab, dusty square, baring the pelts of precipitation like punishment. Toji holds you in your bed. Your weight drapes across his chest like a blanket, your head tucked beneath the cut of his chin.
“Do you like the rain, Toji?”
He felt naked, both in the literal and metaphorical sense. The silken sheets that wrap your mattress were unfamiliar against this flesh, cold and slippery. Regretting the forfeit of pajamas. You two had shared a shower after dinner, of which you held him with all the sentiment in the world. Toji fucking hates when people stand at his back. He doesn’t like it, feeling a presence before seeing them. But he let you stay centimeters behind, working peach and ginger scented shampoo into the roots of his scalp. When he was a boy and his mother had yet to find a place in the Zenin's private graveyard, he vaguely remembers receiving analogous strokes of care from the only family member in his life who didn’t see him as a filthy disgrace. Mom bathed him like this, scrubbing blood and tarnish from his cheeks with a threadbare handkerchief in that tin can he called a tub. All that fucking family money, but a new washcloth or a proper bathtub was never in the cards for him. He remembers mom apologizing often when she washed him.
Toji fucked you in the shower. A difficult means of having sex, sure, but slippery surfaces and soap in the eyes weren’t enough to quell that undying twist of hunger. So he took you against the sleek porcelain wall with his hands shelving beneath the curve of your ass and your legs constricting at his waist. You guided him to a quick orgasm with spouts of hushed praises spoken to his ear; he was certain you didn’t cum, didn’t feel that cute clench you did the first night you two slept together, but you lied and told him you did with a reassuring grin. Why did you lie?
“It’s fine, I guess.” A hand caressed your thigh, the one that was slung over and hiked up onto his stomach. Toji grazed his nails over your flesh, mindless and dejected.
Thunder clapped, then lightning struck, and all Toji could think in the moment was about you and him. Together. Stark nude in bed with limbs entwined. He, the thunder; loud and fierce. Scary, enough to make little children and small animals shake and cower in the corner with fear. You’re more like lightning, he supposes. Elegant and powerful, something so naturally beautiful. 
You will hear thunder and remember me.
More thunder boomed. Toji squeezes your body tighter. “I like that.”
“Like what?” He asks.
You trace wobbly circles against his collar bone, avoiding the slices of silvery skin that raised off the plain of skin. Scars, Toji was doused in gauges. Scraped up head to toe, and he could feel your eyes dart lazily between each and every one of them. “I like the thunder,” comes your reply, followed by a small, bashful shrug. “Ever since I was a kid.”
Toji scoffs. Fuckin’ mind reader. “Liar. Nobody likes thunder.”
“Don’t call me a liar,” you slap his cheek playfully. “I mean it. The quiet can be disturbing sometimes. But to me, thunder is so… human-like? Makes me forget I’m alone.”
This has the man tossing his head back against your feathered pillow. “You’re so full of shit.”
Another stroke of brooding thunder rapped against the window like knock, and if Toji was a believer in the Gods above, he’d curse every last one of them for their shitty comedic timing. You’re giggling into his neck; Toji can feel warm puffs of breath fan over his pulse point. “See?” You ask through a grin. “He came back to yell at you.” He, referring to the crack of thunder. Toji rolls his eyes. Leaves a pinch at your thigh.
“Hey, what did you say before?” Toji walked his fingertips down the curve of your spine, stopping just above your ass. “The fuckin’—the french thing?”
How did it go again? Tu mas something?
It took a moment for you to decipher what he was talking about.
“Tu m'as manqué, Toji?”
Toji bit down on the tip of his tongue, stifling a smile at the grandeur in which you held when speaking the delicate French language. He nods, “what’s it mean?” 
“Means ‘I miss you’.” Is he melting? Liquifying into a disgusting puddle beneath your prying palms, soaking into the bed sheets. You lament over his absence, spitting such pure genuine inflections that Toji is inclined to believe you when you tell him just how much you missed his unlawful presence. Like a stray dog that you offhandedly feed every now and again, praying for its safe and soon return back on your doorstep, digging into the leftover scraps of meat you’ve so kindly plated on the stoop. He’s that washed-up, flea ridden, unabashedly feral mutt that can’t help but crawl back to the idea of home. “I missed you. A lot.”
Toji doesn’t think you’ve ever sounded so vulnerable. Not even in the throes of passion when he’d had you spread and wet for him did you sound like this. Small and volatile, yet self-assured all the same. How the fuck do you manage to balance such contrasting notions? A witch, you must be something of the sort. 
There’s a gap of longing silence that fills the room; Toji concludes that you wait for him to return the gesture. So he does, “I did, too.” It’s the cold, hard truth, and he gives it to you on a silver platter. “Thought about you.”
And he’d leave that there. It was a much sweeter sentiment than to admit that he thought about you particularly often in those bloody showers with his hand wrenched around his hard on. Leaves much room for you to wonder. 
You hum. 
More quiet. He is fond of the quiet moments with you. 
“This looks fresh.” Ruined peace. He feels your thumb pad prod ever so gently at the teared flesh of his pec, the same one you used as your own personal pillow. It was inflamed, red and angry unlike the plethora of other battle scars which have now faded into a cooler pinkish tone with time. You were right; it was new. Nothing but a little switchblade slash—one of the men Toji had decimated this past week was armed. It was a careless mistake, one that had no real impact or effect, Hell, he barely felt the paper cut. But it impacted you, he noticed. “Does it hurt?” A fingertip whispers over the wound, and he flinches. 
Not because it’s painful, but because your gingerness made him sick to his stomach. Never more than in this moment did Toji feel so guilty for accepting your tender touches, wishing to holy Hell his conscience would allow him to bite his tongue. To let you keep thinking of him as some down-on-his-luck middle aged man with a shit job and no money to his name. 
“Don’t touch,” it’s quick, the way he snatching your wrist. Sturdy bone crushed under the bruising grip of his shaky fist. He didn’t mean to grab you so roughly. You’re taken aback by the outburst. 
“I’m sorry.” It’s a meager apology that doesn’t sound right spilling from your lips. It’s trembly and skittish, and your eyes widen coquettishly to flit between his face and the iron-clad grip that joins you together. “I’m—I should’ve asked you first.”
His breathing pattern was off its axis. Shit, shit what is he doing? Toji let’s go, flinching his hand far from your arm like you burned him. He shakes his head. “Didn’t mean to grab you, I didn’t mean to.” Toji pushes up from the warmth of your bed—from the warmth of you—and scans the floor for his boxers. 
You reluctantly part from him, gathering the blanket up over your chest as a makeshift barrier between bare flesh and the chilled air-conditioned bedroom. “What are you doing, Toji?” You sound sad. He finds his boxers. They’re balled up, discarded on the far end of your too-fucking-gigantic bedroom. “Toji!”
He keeps his back toward you, mechanically stepping into his underwear and dragging them up over his hips. It’s fucking gross, feeling the crunch of dried semen as the fabric contorts, but it’s ultimately ignored. “Thanks for dinner, you’re a fuckin’ A chef.” Toji spots his sweatpants nearby. 
“You got that new cut at work.” You’ve made a power move to ditch the comforter, stepping down into the carpet wearing nothing but your birthday suit. The tone of yours shifts, a steep incline from sweet and patient to demanding and accusatory, and Toji doesn’t like that one fucking bit. His sweatpants on, he tosses you a glance over his shoulder. 
“It was an accident.”
“Is that right?” Your brows furrow, gesturing to his torso. His marred, battered, abused torso. “Just covered in accidents then?”
Now he faces you, looks you in the eyes despite your naked form. “Pretty much.” Each lie tastes acidic, like that soupy bile he spits out before vomiting. “Thanks for dinner.” He makes an attempt to stalk past to the door, foregoing the shirt because he couldn’t give less of a fuck about it. Probably lost in a forgotten corner of your room, and with the way his heart raced against his rib cage, Toji wasn’t sure he’d survive long enough in this stuffy room to find it. So he thanks you again with an air of finality, only to be stopped. Your hand is flat against the center of his chest, pressed over the beat of his heart. No doubt about it, he’s sure you can feel that manic tempo. 
Beat, beat, beat. 
“I really thought we were getting somewhere.” You start quietly, voice hovering just above a whisper. His eyes stay fixed on the tiny hand that has glued itself to his sternum. “I thought we… I thought… I don’t fucking know, okay?
I like you. I like you so much, Toji.”
I like you too. “I…” like you I like you I like you. 
“Don’t feel like you have to reciprocate anything. These are complicated feelings, I know that. It’s a lot to spring on a person, but it’s the truth. I’m giving you my truth, and I need you to do the same because I don’t know if I can take another week of you disappearing for however long only to return like… like this!” You gesture to the red gash. “I care about you, and I want to help you. That’s all I’ve ever wanted, but you make it so fucking difficult.”
It felt as though every saliva particle had been vacuumed out of his mouth, leaving a dry desert plain for a tongue. He's never been so at a loss for words before, you actually rendered him speechless. Finally, finally, after a minute of gaping like a stupid fish out of water, Toji finds his bearings. 
“You’re a good person, Y/n.” He peels your hand off him. “And I’m not.” Toji moves to disconnect hands, but yours follows him, clamping them back together. He can’t find the strength to let go, knowing good and well that his palm was clammy as shit. 
Your brows pinch, knitting with confusion at the seemingly random proclamation. “I mean, sure you can be kind of a dick sometimes, but I don’t think—”
You don’t understand. So unscathed by the bleakness of this world, your definition of a bad person is someone who’s ’kind of a dick sometimes.’ Toji’s frown deepens, and he shakes his head, bangs bouncing with the movement. Your fancy conditioner made his hair feel soft against his forehead. “That’s surface level shit. You don’t understand what I’ve done.” 
“So tell me—”
“I can’t.” The word cracks in his throat, and he coughs around it. Choking on it like he did your pretty fingers in the kitchen. “Don’t you get that? If it was that easy…”
“Tell me.” Your voice grows calm, yet stern. Aggressive in the gentlest of ways, coaxing the truth to light. Arms crossed over your bosom, you jut a chin in Toji’s direction. “Because I’m really sick and fucking tired of you treating me like I’m incapable of comprehension. I’ll understand.”
You won’t. He knows you won’t. 
Time grows slow and thick like molasses; Toji feels caught in the midst of an unwinnable battle. Either direction he takes—to come clean, to dance around the truth some more, to lie—will only serve to worsen things to an unfortunate degree. He stalls. Scratches at his jagged jaw dusted with faint stubble. Then, he paws over the masculine plates of his abdomen, feeling his own flesh. There isn’t any warmth to him anymore. Every ounce of humanity had leaked from Toji’s soul, leaving him to become this cold, withering husk of a man. 
When his mouth finally peels open, it takes effort. Like his teeth had been welded together by one of those chewy caramel-coated candies Shiu keeps in his glove compartment. 
“I’m a killer.”
A strange sensation splashed over Toji. Maybe it was relieving to finally share that tidbit of himself, to get his shame out in the open and off his chest. His shoulders felt a little lighter, his joints felt a little looser. This high didn’t last forever, though, and soon he was plummeting back down to Earth when your horror-stricken voice shook in his ears. 
“That’s not a funny joke.”
“Wouldn’t joke. Not about that.” He swirls the built-up saliva in his mouth.
Your eyes were wide, never leaving him. “You… you kill people? For money?”
Begrudgingly, “yes.”
You sputter. “How do you expect me to believe something so—so unimaginable?” Your brows sewed themselves, drawn close in absolute bewilderment. Hinging on the cusp between puking and laughing in his stupid face. “This is insane, Toji.”
He scoffs quietly. “Ain’t fuckin’ lying woman.” No saccharine ma’am. “Wasn’t born with a silver spoon in my mouth. I had to fight to live.” A low blow, but you didn’t seem to take it to heart, far too distracted by your own disturb. 
Toji wasn’t prepared for how much this was going to hurt. The disgusted way you looked at him, something you’d never ever done before, made him barely able to contain his quiver. He deserves every morsel of your animosity, but knowing he deserved it didn’t make it any less painful. Toji felt you scanning, analyzing every scar wedged into his torso. His arms. His neck. His face. He sees you making connections, noticing healed-over bullet wounds and knife attacks for what they were: hideous. He watches you make connections, visualizing a new scenario for each scar; for each life he’s taken and how they desperately fought back against him for mercy. Toji’s body bears the story of hundreds of deaths, and you look sick to your stomach at the realization of what he truly is. 
An ugly monster. 
“Oh my God.” You’re hushed, speaking to yourself. “How many people, Toji?”
He grimaced. “I lost count.”
“Oh my God…” Your hand is pressed to your hairline, and you look exasperated to all Hell. Crazed, maybe. As though he’d just rocked your entire world.
Toji interjects with unnecessary commentary. “I told you. I said you would never understand.”
“No, n-no I understand plenty.” Then, you smile, but it’s not one you’d ever bore to Toji before. It lacks any kindness. It’s empty and unloving. “You’re a murderer.”
He winces. Killer and murderer were synonymous, but for some odd reason being called a murderer was a different type of wrench to the gut. “Yeah.” Toji nods. For the right price, he has slaughtered, fucked, and even sold a few peripheral organs. Because money is everything. Money is food. Money is shelter. Money is life itself. But money isn’t you. 
“Get the fuck out of my home.”
You look terrified of him. Toji is frozen stiff.
“I said go! Fucking leave!” Suddenly, you're rushing to collect your crumpled outfit from the floor, feeding your limbs through the small pair of panties and that oversize bed shirt. Amongst the frenzy to get dressed, you snatch your phone from the bedside table and frantically scrawl over the screen with clumsy fingers. Toji sees tears track down your cheeks, they glint from the light emanating off the cellphone. “Or I’ll call the police.”
And turn in what evidence? He’s too good at what he does, Toji doesn’t leave paper trails behind. But he lets you think you have the power to get him in cuffs. You’re already so frightened, clinging to your phone with trembling hands.
“Go ahead. Call them.” His words are lifeless. Lifeless with a touch of irritation. Spat with malice because you would never understand the life he lives, despite how much you’ve preached to him that you would. You teased him, dangling this idea of a normal life in front of his face. One without lies and secrecy, just you and him and this almighty penthouse. This would more than likely be the last exchange between the both of you, the last time Toji would ever look you in the eyes again, and it angered him. All good things have expiration dates. “You know where I live.”
“Just… Fucking leave.” Christ, you were shaking like a leaf. Was it out of fear? Or anger, maybe? Probably a combination of both. Toji gets a few more seconds of stillness in, spent entirely on gulping down eyefuls of you. Even now, face twisted up and cheeks wet from tears, you look so fucking gorgeous. His savior, the one who showed him how to feel again. 
“Okay.” 
He collects himself, puts on a presence of nonchalant coolness. Like walking out of your bedroom wasn’t the most difficult thing he’s had to do in years. Never-minding the shirt, he walks to the door without sparing a glance back over his shoulder. 
Toji leaves. It’s raining, and he is shirtless and sopping wet. Thunder rumbles. 
You will hear thunder and remember me. 
likes and reblogs are appreciated !
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1K notes · View notes
ashwhowrites · 4 months
Note
Requesting for cliche story fuck boy eddie simping over a nerdy girl. Maybe angst in the middle?
Ugh one of my favorite dynamics to write. I hope this is what you wanted and you enjoy it! Thank you for requesting 🫶🏻
⚠️no actual smut but talks of it
She's different
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Eddie spent years being made fun of and being insecure. In ways, it helped him build a tough shell and made him stronger. But it also made him void of any feelings. He turned cold-hearted and didn't let anyone get close enough to him to hurt him.
He was still a teenager, and he had his own needs. And when his hair grew out and he dressed in chains and leather, more girls were at his feet than he had ever seen. Most girls were from the hideout, groupies that lived to watch him on stage. They threw themselves at him for a chance to get backstage and be under his touch.
Being in a band was the happiest thing that happened to him and he loved the easy access of girls to choose from. School was hell, but the second he was on stage, he was what all the girls wanted. And no one would take that feeling away from him.
~~~
Eddie was half asleep as he sat in class. His hand on his palm as he felt his eyes grow heavier. He had a late night with a girl's name he didn't remember. He moaned in discomfort as he felt her marks still stinging on his back.
"Hi," a soft voice spoke in front of him. He snapped open his eyes to see a girl in front of him. She had glasses, and her hair was down. She wore a little sweater and a skinny pair of jeans.
"Can I help you?" Eddie yawned
"Um..." She said as she looked around the classroom. Everyone is moving to sit with their partners. "We are partners. Were you listening?" She asked with a little giggle.
Eddie couldn't help but smile as the sound left her lips. He had to admit, for a quiet nerd, she was adorable.
"I was not, but take a seat," he said with a smile. He used his foot to push out the chair next to him. She moved delicately as she put down her books and sat next to him. He smelled her perfume and examined her even closer. She had these big curious eyes, a soft nose, and incredibly pink lips, and her skin looked soft.
"Well..." She began to explain everything he missed. He tried to listen, but he couldn't stop watching as her lips moved to form the words. He nodded along as she continued to talk.
She turned her head to look at him, she felt her face burn as he stared at her with a small smile on his face.
She coughed and removed her eyes from his. "So! Let's start."
~~~
By the third day of working together, Eddie loved saying her name. He loved how sweet it sounded as it left his tongue.
He was shocked to find himself so lost in her. Not that being a nerd was bad, he used to be one. But he never thought of himself being attractive while being a nerd. But God, did she do it well.
He was captivated by how smart she was. Way too smart to be in his class. She was mature and he could tell by the way she spoke with a high vocabulary. She didn't make him feel dumb, which was different. She was sweet and took the time to explain anything he didn't understand.
He was smitten.
~~~
Five days into working together he wanted more. He wanted to see her outside of school, outside of her shell. He wanted to see how she looked in the outside world and how her personality might change. He wondered if she had another side of her. A side that didn't stress about grades and let loose.
"What are you doing tonight?" He asked, not realizing he cut her off as she explained another part of the project. He was too lost in his head as he thought about her.
She closed her mouth and gave her answer a thought.
"Well, it's Friday so nothing." She laughed, "Why do you ask? Are you worried we won't finish? Because we have five minutes and just one last paragraph." She explained as she pushed up her glasses.
"Nah, respectfully, I could care less about this project," he chuckled, "I want to hang out, just the two of us and not focus on the project."
She froze as she looked over at him. His eyes sparkled and the sun shined perfectly on his face.
"Why would you want that?" She nervously asked. She couldn't form a single idea why he would want to hang out with her. She wasn't anywhere near his usual crowd of friends.
"Because I want to get to know you. I was thinking about a date?" He offered. He felt a little nervous and didn't understand why. Asking out girls was something he could do in his sleep, but she had his stomach fluttering and his hands sweaty.
He felt more nervous as he waited for her answer.
"Why not," she smiled. She clicked her pen and grabbed his hand. He flinched a little as the pen tickled his hand as she wrote down her phone number.
"Call me," she smiled as she picked up her stuff. A second later the bell rang and she was gone in a flash.
Eddie bit back his smile as he looked down at his hand. Her number and a little heart written next to it. He jumped out of his seat, a bounce in his step as he walked out.
~
Eddie didn't realize he was causing much of a commotion until Wayne walked into his disaster room.
"Edward, what in the hell are you doing?" Wayne asked as he took in the sight of Eddie's room. Clothes were thrown everywhere, and shoes were missing their pairs.
"I'm trying to find a nice shirt but everything is a band!" Eddie cussed to himself.
Wayne couldn't help the smile that went across his face, "And why do you all of a sudden need a nice shirt?" He was young once, and he knew exactly why his nephew was stressed.
"Don't look at me like that," Eddie groaned as he yanked off his shirt and added it to the no pile.
"What's her name?" Wayne asked, he leaned against the door with his arms crossed.
"Y/N," Eddie sighed, "I asked her out and I have nothing to wear!"
"Looks to me like you have a lot of options," Wayne laughed, "But what if we go get a nice shirt? I'll take you."
Eddie looked at his watch, he had a good few hours before he needed to leave.
"Fine but we don't speak of it," Eddie said as he pointed at Wayne.
Eddie's leg shook in the car as they pulled up to the small strip mall.
"How come you are this nervous?" Wayne asked as he got out of the car. "We share a wall so I know you aren't shy with many girls."
Eddie blushed in embarrassment, and he mumbled an apology.
"She's different, I guess." Eddie shrugged, he walked behind Wayne as they walked into the shop.
~
Eddie stood in front of the mirror as he sprayed on cologne. He used water to pat down his hair, and he ran his hands over his new button-up.
He was nervous but he was excited.
Wayne wished him luck as he walked out the door. Eddie got in his van and headed to the address she gave over the phone. His heart raced when he talked to her for a few seconds. He was not sure what he was going to do when he was with her all night.
Before he knew it he was outside her door and knocking.
"Hi, Eddie," she smiled as she opened the door. "You look very handsome." She was surprised to see him in something else other than a band shirt and ripped jeans.
"Oh, thank you," he smiled, "you look wonderful." His eyes skimmed up and down her body. She wore a simple and casual dress. It was white with little sunflowers. It matched her personality. She wore her glasses and light makeup.
"Thank you," she smiled.
Eddie gestured for her to walk in front of him, they walked to his van and got inside. She listened to his music as he drove to the location of their date. She was nervous. She had never been on a date before and definitely not with a guy like Eddie.
"I hope you like water," Eddie said, Y/N looked out the windshield and saw that there was a little pond. He got out of the van and opened her door. She thanked him as she got out. She waited as he grabbed a basket from his backseat.
He led them down a little hill, his hand holding hers as she wobbled.
Once they made it to the flat ground, he let go of her hand. He reached into the basket and pulled out a blanket. He threw it on the ground and offered her to sit first.
She smiled as she sat down, smoothing down her dress to cover her thighs. Eddie sat next to her and took out a few snacks from the basket.
Within an hour they were talking like they knew each other for years. Eddie was learning so much about her and it made him like her even more. She had an amazing personality and she was funny. She made Eddie laugh so hard that water came out of his nose. Which made her laugh so hard she had to hold her stomach.
She didn't think she had ever been so happy to be with someone.
And for once, Eddie loved getting to know someone.
As another hour passed, Eddie's urgers got the best of him. She was telling a story and he was lost in her eyes. The way the moon shined down on her and the sound of the water, it couldn't get more romantic in his eyes.
Eddie didn't notice he was leaning in until she froze. He looked down at her lips as he closed the space between them. He softly kissed her lips, and his hands reached forward to wrap around her waist.
She was nervous but she kissed him back. Her hands shook as she moved her arms around his neck. She was new to this and she wasn't sure how to kiss him back. But as he kissed her harder, she got the hang of it.
The kiss got heated as he slipped his tongue into her mouth, she shivered and was surprised to hear a moan slip from her throat.
Eddie took the moan as a green light to move forward. His hands moved down to her thighs and began to slip under her dress.
Her lips stopped and she yanked back. Her hands stopped his hands from moving even further.
"Don't be nervous," he whispered, he went to attach his lips to hers again but she turned her head.
"I'm not, It's our first date, Eddie. I don't want to rush anything." She explained honestly.
"It's not rushing. I do this on all my first dates." Eddie shrugged like it wasn't a big deal.
Y/N felt a blow hit her chest. All of his dates? How many has he been on? How many had he brought to this exact spot?
"You're a pig," she scoffed as she shoved him off of her. She stood up.
"Woah, what's going on?" He asked as he stood up. He wasn't aware his fuck boy ways were sneaking out of him.
"Absolutely nothing anymore," she glared, "take me home." She marched to his van without a glance back.
~
The car ride was silent. She didn't speak a word, just stared out the window.
She should have known better.
"Did I do something wrong?" he asked as he pulled up to her house.
"I'll see you Monday." She spat as she got out and slammed his door.
"Y/N!" he yelled after her as he got out. He grabbed her arm and turned her around.
"What did I do?" he asked genuinely.
"I do this on all my dates," she mocked, her voice deep as she repeated his words. "I should have known it was all an act."
The realization smacked him in the face.
"Shit, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to push like that." His eyes were soft as he apologized. "None of it is an act! I really like you and I'm not used to feeling that way. I'm used to something different, you know?"
"Maybe you need to figure out everything you feel, and maybe we can talk when you are ready to face those feelings." She smiled sadly and pecked his cheek. He watched as she walked inside.
~~~
The next night Eddie was all over the place. He performed and ran straight to the bar. He wanted to drink his sorrows away. He had one shot and he blew it. He showed just how washed up he was. He slammed down his shot and called for another.
"Hard night?" A random girl asked as she sat next to him. He turned his head to take in the blonde.
"Yep," he said, slamming down his second shot.
"Let me make you feel better," she whispered into his ear.
~
Eddie sat in the back of his van with the random girl on his lap. Her lips were on his neck, but everything felt wrong.
He wasn't enjoying it, and it wasn't making him forget about her. He tried to close his eyes, but all he saw was her sweet smile as they laughed by the water.
He stopped the girl's hands as they went for his belt.
"I can't do this. I'm sorry," he said, he didn't look at her as he grabbed his shirt and slipped it on.
"Are you serious? Since when?" the girl scoffed
"Have you ever really liked someone? Not like being in love, but in that area where you can see yourself falling in love with them?" He asked, the girl sighed and slipped on her shirt.
"Yeah. Chances are if you can already see yourself falling in love, it'll happen. You stuck in that spot?" She asked
"You know my reputation around here. I fuck and move on. She's different. I asked her out and we had an amazing date, then I fucked it up." He sighed, "Not sure how to fix it."
"Admitting it to yourself is the first step,"
"And the next?" he asked
"You admit it to her."
~~~
Monday morning arrived and Eddie was ready to win her back.
Since the project was finished, she wouldn't be sitting next to him. But that was not going to stop him.
He wrote a little note this morning, asking to meet outside during lunch. He walked in and saw her already sitting at her spot. He took a deep breath and handed the note to her.
She looked up at him but didn't say a word.
Eddie walked back to his desk. All throughout class he kept looking back at her.
~
Eddie waited outside and checked his watch. Lunch started ten minutes ago and she wasn't there. He was nervous he might have messed up too much and that she didn't care to fix it. She probably realized he wasn't worth the hassle or the emotions he caused.
He crunched the flowers in his grip as he looked over his shoulder.
"Hi,"
He heard her soft voice before he saw her. He turned around and smiled as she walked closer.
He was nervous as he handed her the flowers, "these are for you."
"Thanks," she said quietly as she took the flowers from his hands.
"I'm really sorry for acting like a dick. You were right, I needed to figure out everything I felt. I went to the bar and I met someone."
Y/N ignored the pain she felt as she listened.
"My plan was to do what I always did. Sleep with someone until I forgot why I was there in the first place. But I stopped it because it felt wrong. I hated myself for being with her. I kept thinking of you." He stepped closer as he held her hand.
"I was doing the wrong thing and with the wrong person. And it made me realize, that I really like you. And I want my main focus to be just on you. I want you." He looked deep into her eyes. "I would love to have the chance to take you out again. I've never actually been on a date, that was my first real one. I know I fucked up the beautiful night we had, but I really think I can make you feel special."
"I guess there's no harm in giving it a shot." She smiled
Eddie jumped to his feet with excitement.
"Thank you!" he crushed her in a hug as she laughed.
~~~
They had been dating for a month and Eddie was true to his word. She felt more special than ever and it was all because of him.
She felt a little nervous as they walked into the hideout. He was honest about his past here and the reputation he had. But she wanted to be a supportive girlfriend and watch him perform. She had to try to forget about all the girls there and just focus on her man.
"The second I'm done, I will be coming straight to you," he smiled. He leaned in and pressed his lips against hers. She was in a territory where Eddie was never taken, and she wanted to prove herself.
She wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him harder. She wasn't shy as she snuck her tongue in his mouth. Her body rocked against his as his hands landed on her ass.
He felt his head spin as she pulled away. His eyes slowly opened as he caught his breath
"What was that?" he asked, his eyes dark as he drank her in
"Good luck kiss," she said with a shrug and smirk
"I'm going to need luck hiding the front of my pants," he teased as he adjusted his tight jeans.
"I'll help you faster," she whispered in his ear. She enjoyed the way he shuddered.
He kept his eyes on her as he walked into the back.
~
She understood why so many girls adored her boyfriend. The way he performed was incredible. It was hard to look anywhere else.
She waited at a table in the back as he wrapped up. His sweaty body came walking towards her but a girl stepped in.
Y/N couldn't hear the conversation but she could tell the girl was flirting by the way she ran her hand up Eddie's arm.
Then another girl came after that one left. And then other.
Y/N felt sick as she watched countless girls walk up and flirt with him. It was a painful reminder of what Eddie's past was.
She was quick to run outside, needed fresh air and to be away from the scene she was stuck watching over and over.
Eddie was quick to push everyone aside and follow her out.
"Hey baby," he said softly, she was leaning against the wall.
"You were amazing!" she praised as she pulled him into a hug. Eddie hugged her back and thanked her. He pulled back but kept his arms around her.
"Want to tell me what happened in there?" Eddie asked
Y/N sighed and looked down at her feet
"I was just a little jealous."
"Why? You are my girlfriend, they've got nothing on you." Eddie explained
Y/N scoffed and unhooked her arms from him.
"They have all had sex with you, Eddie! They've got plenty on me. I mean, I am nothing like those girls."
"Exactly!" Eddie said as he placed his hands on her face. "I don't want you to be anything like them. I want you because you are you. Yes, I've been physical with them, but that is all. There is no connection or emotional ties. It's different with you because I really see myself falling in love with you."
"Really?" she smiled as she looked up at him.
"Of course." He said as he crashed his lips on hers. She moaned as she kissed him back, her hands in his hair.
After a few seconds, she pulled away. Smirking as he chased her lips. She had him right around her finger.
"You know..." she started, her hands slipped down his body and rested on top of his jeans. "Maybe I'll eliminate the one thing they have on me." Her smirk made Eddie shiver in excitement.
"As in sex?" Eddie choked out. His eyes lit up like Christmas as he practically bounced with anticipation.
"Van, now." She said as she turned around and walked towards his fan.
He watched her walk away with a dopey smile on his face.
"YOU COMING?" she yelled as she turned. She walked backward and kept her eyes on him. She laughed as he seemed to snap out of his daydream. He fished out his keys and dropped them on the floor.
"SHIT, I'M COMING!" he screamed as he bent down and grabbed his keys.
She giggled as he ran straight to the van.
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Yoongi Fic Recommendations
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a - angst f - fluff s - smut
part 2
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Series
In the Margins (a s f) by @bonvoyagenoona ⊹₊⋆ You weren’t sure what he would look like. His writing made you think of a cabin nestled among tall pines, a well-worn cardigan, a scotch neat, and a wistful wisp of smoke seeping into the air from the bowl of an unattended tobacco pipe. What stands before you now is a studio apartment in the city, cigarette butts, coffee stains, and a scowl. There’s definitely been a mistake.
Fix You (f a) by @casuallyimagining ⊹₊⋆ When you take in a stray cat, you have no idea he’s secretly a hybrid trying to escape his past. Can you help him heal?
desolate (a f s) by @angelicyoongie ⊹₊⋆ you just wanted a cute little normal cat to keep you company. so you're not really sure how you ended up with the grumpiest hybrid on earth that seems hellbent on making your life difficult.
One Shots
Set Me Free (a f) by @casuallyimagining ⊹₊⋆ Tired of being told how to live his life and unsure of where he stands in the world, Yoongi--your soulmate--yearns to be free. When you give him what he wants, it causes a rift in your relationship that seems irreparable. 12 years later, you find him back in your life. Can you mend your relationship? Do you even want to?
back-burner (a f s) by @yoonpobs ⊹₊⋆ sometimes you felt like you were the back-burner of a two-decade-long friendship. how could you ever compete?
Love Language (a s f) by @gukslut ⊹₊⋆ Your boyfriend obviously loves you, but his silence has you questioning if he *wants* you. If you could only get past your damn insecurities maybe you could appreciate what you have.
27 Phone Numbers (f) by @bxebxee ⊹₊⋆ Yoongi has gone through twenty-seven phone numbers over the last ten years, and you haven’t changed yours since high school. 
sweetner (f s) by @taegularities ⊹₊⋆ You used to know how he sounded when you were wrapped around him, but circumstances have pulled you apart and sent you scattering in opposite directions. Feelings shouldn't reappear so easily by simple words, but when you find yourselves in the same place once again, this is exactly what happens.
One Chance (f) by @out-of-jams ⊹₊⋆ A musical genius, a guy with a bad reputation, your assigned partner for your final project. And the last thing you ever would have expected.
Seasons Change (a s) by @taetaesbaebaepsae ⊹₊⋆ Min Yoongi and you, through the seasons, break up and come back together. Nobody said love was easy.
All That Holly, Jolly Sh*t (a f s) by @daechwitatamic ⊹₊⋆ You haven’t seen or heard from Yoongi since he broke your heart five years ago, laying out a logical list of reasons why you were better off breaking up. When a Christmas Eve blizzard traps you together for the night, you have no choice but to examine how few of those reasons are still true. And if they’re not… where does that leave you?
Now We Reign (a s f) by @oddinary4bts ⊹₊⋆ when working on a collab together makes you and Min Yoongi seek comfort with the other, you discover there’s more to life than loneliness. Only, hurdles mark your path in Min Yoongi’s life, and it’s unclear what the outcome will be. Will you be destroyed by him and his world, or will you learn to reign over it, together with him?
take five (a f) by @jiminrings ⊹₊⋆ you're min yoongi's nurse and you have a crush on him, and he gives you five chances to ask him out - he never said anything about accepting though.
The Final - Day 02 (s) by @yoongiofmine ⊹₊⋆ You've been Yoongi's go-to companion for the past few years, well aware that's all you were going to be. Despite your very real, growing feelings for the rapper, you took what you could get every time. Now, you're backstage at day two of the final leg of his tour when another member takes an interest in you. Will it be enough to make Yoongi realize he's got competition?
hello soulmate (f) by @bluemari23 ⊹₊⋆ your first day on the job doesn't turn out the exact way you envisioned
Sugar Rush Ride (s) by @lo1k-diamonds ⊹₊⋆ You produced a song based on your hidden desires for your fellow producer and promised yourself that tonight, things would change. You were done pining after him, but then he arrived at the listening party.
fuck being friends (a f s) by @strawberrynamjoon ⊹₊⋆ as if watching the guy you were hopelessly in love with hook up with another girl each weekend wasn’t enough, he also happened to be your best friend, making things extra complicated. and it only gets worse and worse once he finds you crying in the bathroom at a party one night.
Take One (s f) by @untaemedqueen ⊹₊⋆ There are three things which Yoongi was certain of. One, he was a big star in his field of work. Two, he had a huge cock, one to rival many of the largest names in his industry. Three, he can only find pleasure these days in written word. 
Illicit Favors (f s) by @yoongiofmine ⊹₊⋆ When your editor tells you to re-write the chapters of your book because the sex scenes are weak, suggesting you write them from experience, what do you do when you lack any kind of sexual experiences in general? You go to your friend and ask him for help with it.
Bet On It (s) by @minisugakoobies ⊹₊⋆ What's a little wager between enemies? How about if it's your body on the line?
subscribed (s f) by @aquagustd ⊹₊⋆ you find out that youtube isn’t the only site he uses to satisfy his subscribers. what do you do with that information?
2K notes · View notes
ladadiida · 1 year
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𝐩𝐮𝐭 𝐦𝐲 𝐧𝐚𝐦𝐞 𝐚𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐭𝐨𝐩 𝐨𝐟 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭 | 𝐬𝐚𝐧𝐣𝐢 𝐱 𝐟𝐞𝐦!𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫 (𝐬𝐧𝐞𝐚𝐤 𝐩𝐞𝐞𝐤)
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𝐬𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲 as much as you wanted to stay by his side, you couldn't bear the thought of watching him fall in love with other women while you're stuck at the kitchen washing dishes and measuring ingredients. so you dreamt of leaving, of traveling to different islands to share your lovely songs and tunes; but the more your desire to leave grows, the more sanji finds himself drowning in your warmth. or, you and sanji over the years, wherein five times you tried to leave him and the one time you finally did, despite his refusal to let you go.
𝐭𝐚𝐠𝐬 musician reader, 5 + 1 things, pining, unrequited love, not actually unrequited love, angst, fluff, hurt/comfort, angst with a happy ending
𝐧𝐨𝐭𝐞 i swear i cannot escape a brainrot whenever i watch a new show. this automatically wrote itself, i don't even remember how i came up with this idea. anyway, i'm surprised there aren't many sanji fics that involves the unrequited love trope, seeing that it suits him. or maybe that's just me. this is only a SNEAK PEEK though.
𝐞𝐝𝐢𝐭 full version now published here!
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You accepted it years ago.
You accepted the fact that you somehow fell in love with Sanji Vinsmoke along your weird journey of working in a sea restaurant full of former pirates and making music while at it. How the pesky feelings grew and wrapped themselves around your aching heart, you didn't know. Maybe it was when he learned to cook your favorite food and gave it to you afterwards, or the way his crystal blue eyes reminded you of snowflakes every winter.
Or maybe it was when he pulled your hair out of jealousy the moment he learned that Zeff would be taking in another child in his care, but brushed it and even braided it after the latter cleared the misunderstanding. Maybe it was when he supported you in your dreams and told you they weren't silly, maybe it was when he fought off drunk men that were trying to hit on you. Or maybe it was the way his voice would drop an octave lower whenever he asks you for a favor. The list could go on and on and you still wouldn't know the reason why. It doesn't matter anyway. You tripped, you fell, and now you're pining.
Drying off the last of the plates, you washed your own hands after and patted them dry on your skirt. You were the last one to leave the kitchen, the other staff already back in their quarters after a long, exhausting day of cooking. You fixed the signature blue bandana tied in your hair then went on your way towards the upper deck.
You weren't blessed with a talent in cooking, so you offered to do chores instead. Washing the dishes, cleaning the restaurant, and doing the laundry were few of the things you do in the Baratie. You can't say that you enjoy it, but you were beyond grateful that Zeff gave you a chance despite his opposition to let a woman work inside his restaurant.
As you were about to go to the newly laundered clothes you hung on a thin wire earlier that morning, you heard two voices speaking. You also smelled cigarette smoke wafting through the air, and you only knew one person who could be smoking at this hour. Your breath hitched in anticipation.
"You bringing a woman to your bed again, Sanji?" The other person asked playfully, but there was a hint of disbelief in his voice. You carefully took a peek so you won't accidentally reveal yourself and be accused of eavesdropping. Two people came into view with their backs facing you.
"Now, what are you talking about, Patty? I am a gentleman. I only had a nice chat with the lovely lady and escorted her back to her ship." Sanji interjected, a cigarette hanging on his lips.
Patty huffed. "I didn't know that chatting included kiss marks on jawlines."
This caused Sanji to laugh and say, "Not my fault she was charmed by my food."
"The boss man ain't gonna like it when he finds out about this."
"He's not gonna find out." Sanji assured him, wiping off the said kiss mark on his jaw. You stared at him as he did so, and you pitied the woman who planted that kiss, knowing she was just one of the many beautiful ladies Sanji had flirted with before. However, a tinge of pain in your chest said otherwise, taunting you that it was not pity you're feeling, but foul jealousy.
"Why don't you look for more decent women, eh? How about 'little lass' for a change?" Patty suddenly suggested.
It was like someone had hit your stomach with one of the metal pans in the kitchen with the way it lurched in surprise and nervousness. Your heartbeat started to quicken the longer you waited for his response, making your grip on your skirt tighter. In moments like these, you allowed yourself to hope, to wish that he saw something in you and that he finds you beautiful and lovely enough to be the person standing by his side.
But his answer made all that hope crumble down into nothing but dust.
"I don't see her that way." Sanji said after a long stretch of silence, taking a long drag from the cigarette then releasing the smoke in a single breath.
Ah.
You blinked repeatedly, trying to keep the tears from forming. It's always been like this, so why can't you get used to it? Taking a deep breath, you gulped away the knot forming in your throat and decided to leave. You can grab the clothes later.
"You're too kind for him." Someone behind you spoke, making you jump and tense up. Turning around, you saw Zeff looking at you with an unreadable emotion in his eyes and his hands on his hips, almost like he knew your secret. Of course he does. He always sees everything.
You stumbled on your words. "Sir?"
"That boy is always up to something." He began, switching his attention to Sanji. "One minute he's stubbornly immature in the kitchen, and the next he'll be a thirsty man staring at women like they're liquid booze."
Clearing your throat, you forced a smile.
"Well, he can be a lot sometimes." You agreed, remembering the days when the two of you would fight over irrelevant matters. Then you chuckled and continued, "But he's kind. He's gentle, and lovely, like a freshly made poem you keep repeating in your head. But then he's also confusing, hot-headed, and reckless. He's like the sea, isn't he? Calm yet wrapped with mystery, dangerous yet beautiful..."
You trailed off, an unbearable heat rising up your cheeks and neck once you slowly began to realize that you just ranted out your feelings to the head chef. You glanced at him with wide eyes, preparing to see a disgusted look on his face; however, Zeff didn't appear to be repulsed by your little speech. In fact, the corners of his lips were slightly quirked up.
"But I cannot swim. If I were to drown, he wouldn't save me." You quickly added, hoping to shut down the topic.
He sighed. "You will meet someone who deserves you as much as you deserve them, little lass." He simply said. He then laid his hand out, and on his palm was a little box poorly tied with a ribbon. "Here, for you."
Altnough you were a bit confused at the random gift, you accepted it and cradled the box to your chest. "I'll be okay, Zeff." You insisted, grinning cheekily. "When I become famous, I'll sing my songs here in Baratie, and people would flood the restaurant to hear my singing. And to eat your food too, of course."
The head chef nodded, relief flooding his expression. "I look forward to that." He said while awkwardly returning your smile.
That night, when you were sure that everyone in the Baratie was asleep, you opened the loose floorboard on the floors of your bedroom and grabbed the wooden box you kept hidden for a long time now. You opened the lid and began counting the Berry you saved for the past few months.
Tomorrow was the perfect day to leave.
You just can't stay here. Yes, you had a roof over your head, delicious food to eat everyday, and clean clothes to wear but you were so miserable. This wasn't the life you wanted. You wish to go out there, sing your heart out, and fall in love with someone who actually loves you back.
A knock on your door made you freeze. You held your breath as the person on the other side continued to knock a few more times. "You awake?"
Pain surged through your veins, your chest twisting in agony. Sanji.
"You didn't come down for dinner. I guess you're too tired, hmm?" He said, his muffled voice gentle, and the sound almost prompted you to stand up and open the door for him. But you dug your fingernails in your palms and resisted, because you can't just let this opportunity pass by.
You heard a brief clinking sound before Sanji spoke again, "Sweet dreams, ange."
Once his footsteps faded away, you cautiously moved towards your door and opened it as quietly as you can. There, on the floor, was a small plate with a slice of your favorite dessert: angel's food cake, topped with fresh cream and strawberries.
You bent down and saw a note beside the plate. And when you got to read the contents of the note, you burst into tears and sobs that wracked down your entire body.
Happy Birthday
— S.
You ate the cake with tears silently falling down your cheeks, and that was the first time you failed to leave Sanji Vinsmoke.
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again, this is only a sneak peek of the actual fic, i'm currently halfway in completing it. please let me know if you want to read it, because i might publish it next week. if not, i'll just drown in sorrow and self-pity.
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urdepressedslut · 1 year
Text
You’re Mine, Sunshine (masterlist) ♡
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♡ Pairing: Grumpy!Bodyguard!Bucky Barnes x Sunshine!Fem!Reader (Mob!Au Bodyguard!Au)
♡ Series Summary: Bucky gets picked by a very rich and respected man to be his daughter’s personal bodyguard. The Father warns him that it won’t be an easy job, that she is a brat and difficult to deal with. But what happens when Bucky meets you and you’re the complete opposite?
♡ Series Warnings: mentions of amputation, dark themes, violence, death/death threats, talk of parent death, fluff, angst, stalking, daddy issues, anxiety attacks/panic attacks, abuse, depression, depressive episodes, PTSD, dry humping, hints to smut, (warnings to be added as new chapters are released)
Trope ⇢ Grumpy x Sunshine ☀️
(SERIES ONGOING)
Last Updated: 9/8/23
MINORS DO NOT INTERACT | SERIES 18+
⇨ Chapter One
↳ After Pierce interviews Bucky for the job, he warns him of you. Bucky is starting to rethink his decision, but when he meets you... you're not what he expected.
⇨ Chapter Two
↳ Bucky takes you home, and later finds you in the library. You both get to know each other a little better, but Bucky is hesitant.
⇨ Chapter Three
↳ Bucky has a surprise meeting with Pierce, getting informed about your secret admire. Meanwhile, Bucky tries to keep things professional, he’s hesitant to cross the line when you need him.
⇨ Chapter Four
↳ You don’t know what to think of Bucky after he took you to bed last night. Bucky can’t continue to keep the stalking situation hidden from you. Something is found on your doorstep.
⇨ Chapter Five
↳ Getting to know each other better doesn’t go according to plan. Bucky has to comfort you and fix the mess he made. Will you forgive him?
⇨ Chapter Six
↳ Bucky receives a morning visit from Steve, with the news about what was in the box. Bucky continues to think about what he should do. Should he tell you the truth about your stalker?
⇨ Chapter Seven
↳ Bucky finds you making a mess in the kitchen, attempting to bake and offers his help. The two of you get to talking and some reveals about each other begin to come out. Will he finally tell you about your stalker?
⇨ Chapter Eight
↳ After a surprise visit from Pierce, tension arises as he threatens Bucky of his job. Pierce wants to have a talk with you and it doesn't go very well.
⇨ Chapter Nine
↳ After the events from the other day, you try and cope with the reality of what happened. The world is a lot less colorful than you remember. Bucky helps comfort you after you realize you have no one left.
⇨ Chapter Ten
↳ Someone comes knocking at your door in the morning. Bucky answers and is surprised with who he finds. Are they going to help them or hurt them?
⇨ Chapter Eleven
↳ The tension can't be ignored anymore between you and Bucky. Steve shows up and he's not alone.
⇨ Chapter Twelve
↳ Reality is hitting you as you, Bucky, Steve and his men all venture off to a secret safe house only Steve knows about. The events from the last couple of days are starting to hit you with a sickening force, leaving you weak and crippled.
⇨ Chapter Thirteen
↳ Your dreams consist of random memories of your parents, but are they really random? Despite the past days of hell—you still find it difficult to resist Bucky. You two spend a heated morning together, devouring each other while you still have these moments.
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ohdeerfully · 7 months
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K hear me out, a wife! Reader x Alastor and Charlie finds out they had a kid when they were alive. (I don’t mind what the kids name is but make them young and passed due to Spanish flu, dark I know)
omg this has been sitting in my drafts so long, i love requests like this </3 im sorry if it seems rushed, i really wanted to finish it!
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Mourning Dove
Alastor x Reader (angst, slight comfort at end) TW: CHILD DEATH, child sickness, reader referred to as a woman but doesnt effect story too much join my discord! ═══ ◈ ══════════ ◈ ══════════ ◈ ══════════ ◈ ═══
You sat yourself unceremoniously at the bar in the hotel lobby, shoulders slouched and cheek squished against the cold countertop. You weren’t one for alcohol, but you didn’t mind the company of Husk. He didn’t say much unless prompted, but that didn’t bother you. It was nice, honestly, after a day of dealing with the others.
“Somethin’ the matter?” Okay. Nevermind about him not saying much.
“Hmm?” You responded, barely peeking up from your finger that dragged patterns in the surface you laid against. “I’m good.”
“You don’t look it,” Husk observed, and you knew he was referring to the discoloration of your eyes and the residual dampness of your cheeks from crying. Your hair was a mess, too. Yeah, you looked like shit. “Tough day?”
“I guess, yeah,” You sighed, pushing yourself up and leaning back in a stretch while your fingers gripped the countertop to steady yourself. “Just thinking about… Y’know.”
He didn’t pry, and you were thankful for that. Husk did know a little, actually, and knew better than to push for more details. After being stuck with Alastor for so long, with the guy owning his soul and all, he inevitably learned some deep shit about him and, by extension, you. He just grunted in response and went back to spot cleaning his bottles of booze.
“(Y/N)!” A chipper voice called your name, and you squeezed your eyes shut in frustration. You thought you were done with all of this for the day, and you were so ready to just go to sleep. “I wanted everybody to join me for dinner today! We have a few new residents, so I want everybody to meet each other.”
You squeezed your lips to prevent a harsh word from responding to Charlie’s invitation. You were so tired. You feigned a weak smile and looked at her. You wanted to say no, to say you needed to sleep, but those huge, pleading eyes of hers caught the rejection in your throat. You tried to reason with yourself that Charlie doesn’t host stuff like this very often. It would just be one night. You’ll survive.
“Okay.” 
She clasped her hands together and jumped on the balls of her feet, thanked you, and took off to find the next resident to invite. You held your head against your hand and you sighed dramatically. Husk looked at you from the corner of his eye, but opted to remain silent. You stood up after a few more minutes of quiet sulking, deciding you should fix yourself up for dinner.
In your room, you gently fixed your hair and threw on a casual outfit. Nothing super nice, just in case food started flying–knowing the antics of some of the hotel residents, it wouldn’t be a surprise.
You slowly made your way to the banquet room, which Charlie had installed for events like today. You could already hear the low murmur of small talk, and you were surprised to see a few new faces. Not a whole lot, just about five, alongside the familiar faces of your friends. Charlie’s hotel was, slowly but surely, becoming more successful.
You spotted Alastor quickly–he was hard to miss due to his height. You settled yourself in a chair next to him at a long table that Charlie had dragged into the room for everybody to sit at. You felt your skin prickle with the familiar sensation of static, which increased slightly as his attention turned towards you. He gave you a grin before focusing his eyes on the racket that was already picking up. You watched his smile curl, a bit sinister, as the sound of shouting caught your attention.
“-my fuckin’ business!” You picked up the tail end of Angel Dust fuming at Vaggie, one pair of arms crossed under his chest. He had a third hand on his hip, with his fourth hand jabbing an accusatory point at the woman in front of him.
“Guys, please!” Charlie pleaded, pressing her shoulder against Vaggie’s in an attempt to move her away from Angel. “I don’t want to scare my new guests away!”
“Tell this bitch to keep her nose outta my shit! I can’t have my fuckin’ life on the line because she doesn’t like my job!” Angel spat. There was a dangerous, maybe even frantic, look in his eyes. Before Charlie could say anything, Angel had spun around and stormed to the table. He ripped the chair out and slammed his body down. All four of his arms were crossed now as he glowered at the wooden tabletop.
You sighed, and felt a headache already forming. 
Angel’s spirits quickly changed when Husk sulked into the room. He had his paws stuffed in his pockets, and glared at the air in front of him. He sat down at the other end of the table, but Angel was quick to stand up and saunter his way over to sit next to the cat. You couldn’t quite catch the flirtatious remarks that made Husk roll his eyes. 
You observed them for a while, watching as Husk slowly grew more comfortable in the small talk he and Angel shared. He would never admit it, but you knew Husk didn’t hate Angel’s company. Husk seemingly said something about you to Angel that made him whip his head up to look at you. You quickly averted your gaze.
Charlie had been standing by her own chair, and a cough from her throat made the chatter die down. You didn’t really listen to the overly sappy speech she had started to give, your mind drifting away in absent thought. You picked your nails into the edge of the table, fidgeting with the light cloth.
Alastor caught your attention by lightly nudging his leg against yours. You trailed your eyes up to his, meeting his red gaze. There was a hint of worry in his eyes, and his grin twitched at the edges as he looked at your exhausted face. He tilted his head in a silent question.
You merely shook your head in response, and mouthed a quick “it’s nothing” and hoped that he wouldn’t press. He didn’t, but you knew he’d ask again in a private room.
Charlie sat down again, and Vaggie rubbed her shoulder, murmuring a silent praise. You dragged your eyes across the table, making note of the handful of new faces. None of them seemed to take Charlie very seriously, but that didn’t come as a surprise. They probably just liked free food.
The food in question seemingly materialized out of nowhere, and you chalked it up to her “princess of hell” type powers that she didn’t use very often. You smiled gratefully and, though you didn’t have much of an appetite, you started slowly picking at the plate in front of you.
The room once again began to rumble with small talk, but at some point the multiple conversations began to melt together until the whole table was talking to each other in one. Charlie was doing most of the heavy lifting with keeping the conversation going.
“-the deal with the Radio Demon and that gal next to him?” You perked your ears when you heard this reference to yourself. One of the new guests, some sort of lizard demon, had a finger pointed at the two of you. He had a slight country drawl in his voice. You saw Alastor’s smile widen when the attention of the table turned towards himself.
“My darling wife,” Alastor stated simply, briefly placing a hand on your shoulder. His eyes were closed as he smiled proudly. You silently nodded with a light, polite smiling. “We knew each other in life. It’s only natural for us to remain together. It would have been a shame for death to do us part.”
“Didn’t think you was the type…” The lizard said slowly, eyeing the two of you carefully. You didn’t blame him; what kind of nut job would marry the Radio Demon? Though, as Alastor said, you were married before Hell, and he wasn’t so… infamous back then. He was actually rather sweet, besides the whole serial killer thing–which, in your defense, you weren’t even aware of till he was shot to death.
“Didn’t think ya were the type to have a kid, either,” Angel piped up absently, one arm thrown lazily over the back of his chair. You watched as Husk tried desperately to shut him up as he continued to speak, but you barely heard the words over the sound of your heart picking up pace, and the increased radio frequency of Alastor’s. His body had stiffened and his eyes had shot open, quickly narrowing as his smile strained and curled dangerously, his gums visible in a snarl. His eyes were not on Angel, but on Husk, whose ears were flattened against his head and a nervous look in his wide eyes.
You weren’t really paying attention though, but you felt the intense tension and rapid prickling on your skin. Your breathing became more labored and you pointed your face to the table to try to hide the building tears in your eyes. You had tried so hard, all day, to push back the memories that kept threatening to resurface. What are the chances that on the same day, the topic was brought up, destroying the wall you had built to contain the anxiety, regret, grief…
You were kneeling by the wrinkled, messy sheets of the twin bed your son had been in for the past couple days. Your heart was tight, and you could barely breathe as you looked at him. He gazed blearily at the ceiling, following the path of the rocking fan. Every breath he took scratched at his throat, as if there were pebbles blocking the path. He barely had the strength to cough. His lips were dry and cracked, and his graying skin still had a flush of fever. You used a damp rag to clean the dried snot under his nose.
You had tried everything. Every recommended antibiotic, every treatment, therapy, exercise; nothing had worked. Nobody knew how to treat the illness. You had even tried to work with witch doctors that Alastor knew. You had spent so much of what little money you had trying to save your little boy.
Alastor was often gone during this time, being the one to go out and find something new to try. You never left the room, even when your husband tried to push you to go outside to stretch your legs or take a shower. He promised to watch over your son. But you just couldn’t, not with David laying on these dirty sheets, looking so frail, weak, and small. You had often called him little dove, and it made you sick to think that your nickname was now like a cruel adjective to describe his current state. A sick, frail baby bird. He had barely eaten in the past eight days, and you didn’t want to admit to yourself that any scratchy breath he took could be that last one.
You stiffened when his head rolled over towards you, and his eyes struggled to focus on you. His cracked lips grimaced for a moment, followed by a sharp, grating cough that made your heart drop and your eyes sting. You reached a shaky hand forward to smooth down his knotted hair.
“Am I going to be okay,” David said weakly. His voice caught on the tightness in his throat multiple times. “I feel really bad.”
“I know baby, but you’re okay,” You said tenderly, continuing to stroke his hair. “Your dad is getting you some new medicine. You’ll be okay.”
You were lying to him, and to yourself. But you couldn’t help but cling on to a morsel of hope–it was all you could do, really. David just looked towards you, his eyes flicking around slightly, unable to truly focus on anything.
“I’m tired.” He said. His breathing was labored.
“I know.”
Your emotions threatened to spill from your eyes as you watched him turn his head back towards the ceiling, eyes shutting. You didn’t want to cry; you couldn’t, not in front of him. You needed to stay strong for him.
You pressed the back of your hand to his burning forehead, and then trailed your hand to his chest, lightly pressing against him to feel his heartbeat. It was slow, and slowing. Your own heart picked up in response. 
You heard the door in another room open, shut, and footsteps quickly pace towards the room. The door cracked lightly, and the tall, thin frame of your husband peeked in. He held a brown back tightly in his fist. With one look into your eyes, he knew something was wrong. Or, well, more wrong than usual. 
You clenched your jaw to prevent any sob from escaping your lips as he sat the bag down on an end table and kneeled next to you, gripping your waist tightly as he looked at David. The boy’s breath had gotten dangerously quiet.
You watched as his eyes opened again.
“I’m tired.” He repeated, weaker this time.
Both you and Alastor leaned towards the bed, his hand on David’s leg as you gingerly lifted the boy’s head into your arms, pulling his light body towards yourself. You shifted yourself up into the bed with him, trying to wrap as much of yourself around your son as possible. You could feel his heartbeat getting slower with every weak breath he took.
“Sleep, then,” your voice trembled. You felt Alastor grip your shoulder, his other hand softly rubbing David’s arm. You couldn’t describe the expression on his face. “I’ll see you in the morning, little dove.” You lied.
“In heaven?” He responded. Your breath hitched at his words. He knew, somehow, that he was dying. How sick it was, for such a young boy to be aware of his impending death. How cruel God was.
“Yeah, I promise,” Was all you could muster. You worried that any more would destroy the dam that held back your tears.
It broke, though, when you felt David’s heart finally stop. You choked on a sob once, twice, before finally you started wailing. Screaming. You held a vice-like grip on the boy, both your arms and legs secured around him. Alastor was still quiet, but he had sat across from you on the bed and pulled you towards him, securing you and David’s still-warm body in an equally tight grip. You could feel his strained breathing and tight jaw against your head. He said something, but you didn’t hear him.
Your mind rushed back to the present when you felt a hand on your back. Your head whipped towards Alastor, who was looking at you. The table was dead silent, and there was still a look of rage in his eyes, but his smile held a softness that was only ever given to you. Your heart still beat strongly, and you struggled to breathe, but you were at least glad that your mind was still back in the present.
Evidently, barely any time had passed. Angel had a nervous look in his expression, which he tried and failed to mask as Husk cursed at him. Charlie was looking at you in worry.
“(Y/N),” She said softly. “...How come you never-”
“Truly, there is no point in speaking of life before death,” Alastor interrupted her, the usual cheer in his voice lilted by a masked emotion. You knew he felt the same grief as you, but he was a million times better at acting naturally. “What a waste of time and emotion.”
Alastor stood quickly, his hand trailing against your shoulders as he walked past you and towards Angel and Husk. Husk’s ears flattened to his skull again as Alastor loomed over them, hands behind his back as a smile twisted his features.
“Husker, my friend,” He said, the cat demon visibly flinching at the mention of his name. “Let’s take a walk.”
Husk didn’t move, and the room grew heavy with tension with every second as the sound of radio frequency got louder and somehow sharper. Alastor bent at the waist, his snarling smile inches away from the panicked expression on Husk’s face. 
“Is the tomcat getting too old to hear?” You barely picked up Alastor’s words, but you definitely heard the threatening tone in his voice.
The cat swallowed hard before standing up. He shot one last infuriated look at Angel, before whipping his head back to attention when Alastor tapped his cane against the ground impatiently. The two of them left the room, and the tension in the air immediately lifted when the door shut.
Charlie startled you when she placed a delicate hand on your upper arm, and she guided you to your feet and out another set of doors. A weak smile touched her expression.
“Do you want to talk about it?” She asked as you both went up the stairs towards your hotel room. You shook your head silently at her offer. She only nodded back, and said nothing more. She opened the door to your room for you, and waited till you settled down in your bed before saying a string of comforting words that you didn’t really pay attention to. The door clicked softly, and you once again began to sob.
Only a few minutes passed before you felt your skin prickle with a static-like feeling. You had grown to find comfort in the odd sensation, and felt incredibly relieved when you knew Alastor was sitting next to you. You didn’t even hear him enter the room.
He pulled you wordlessly against his chest, lying the two of you down. You twisted yourself in his grip till your ear rested against him, listening to the odd drum of what you assumed was a heart.
“Has David been troubling you all day?” He asked you when your sobs slowed and you caught your breath. You nodded. Alastor rubbed a soothing hand on your shoulder blade. You recognized the tone of grief in his voice as he spoke. “What a pesky boy, even all these years later.”
You wrapped your arms tightly around Alastor’s neck as tears began flowing again.
Though you would never tell him, you often hoped Charlie’s idea of redemption would work. Your husband himself would likely never follow that path; you knew he saw no point and enjoyed the power he held in Hell. But, you wished every day to see your son again. To see your little dove.
You had promised him.
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januaryembrs · 4 months
Note
Hi! May I have a hot chocolate with Aaron Hotchner and a splash of angst please?
OVERPROTECTIVE | Aaron Hotchner x Reader
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description: keeping your relationship with your boss is difficult when he gets so damn overprotective
length: 2.5k (Em doesn't know how to go small on things)
warnings: mention of a knife? mention of feeling sick? mention of a wound?
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“Sit down, Agent,” His voice was a growl that made you stop loading up your gun, Emily and Derek freezing in their seats to witness the catfight when they caught the heated glare exchanged between the two of you. Your fingers paused on the cartridge, clicking it into the ammunition vault before switching your glock onto the safety, turning to face your boyfriend with a sneer on your face. 
“Agent?” You tested the water with a raised brow, seeing if he would double down with his attitude once he seemed to have realised he had crossed some sort of line with his words. 
“Prentiss and Morgan are going after the suspect, I want you here with Reid mapping out the geographical profile,” He ordered his teams, though you were quick to catch how he couldn’t meet your eyes as he turned to Dave, his fingers fixing his cuffs the way he did when he was thinking about something, “Dave, I want you with JJ at hostage negotiation, he still has the girls and might not be willing to give them up so easily-”
“Surely we’d be more use in the field, I mean, we’ve gotten pretty much everything out of the profile that we can.” Reid tried to point out, only for Hotch to turn to him with a scathing frown. 
“Is there something wrong with the orders I’ve given, Reid?” Aaron asked, his tone particularly cold, and Spencer was quick to look flustered, ever the teachers pet who loathed being told off. 
“N-no I just thought,” He spluttered, quickly packing up his files as Hotch gave him a sharp look, “We’ll stay here, it’s fine,” 
Your Unit Chief barely acknowledged him as he huffed, turning and heading for his office, “Wheels up in ten,” 
But you weren’t going to let him slip away that easily, especially not with an attitude like that. 
“Baby girl, think about what you’re doing here,” Morgan tried to call as you paced after him, your expression ruthless as you stalked behind the man, “Starting a fight with the boss is not going to win you any favours, sweetheart,” 
Except he wasn’t just your boss, only they didn’t know that. 
Aaron could tell you were hot on his heels even without hearing Morgan’s desperate attempt to help. To them, it must look like one of their colleagues was about to make a huge misjudgement on just how harsh their boss could be when he wanted to. Every single one of the BAU had gone head to head with Aaron at some point, it was only natural for eight people who spent day in, day out with one another, but not one of them had left the interaction feeling good about themselves. 
As a boyfriend, Aaron was almost a complete antithesis of who he was at work. His words were butter smooth, his touch gentle as lace, his heart surprisingly tender for a man who had seen the worst humanity had to offer. And he respected you, he was kind, he was soft and mallowed out, and it had started bleeding into his demeanour at work in the five months you’d been dating. He’d come to work with a skip in his step, you showing up around five minutes later now you guys had coordinated sitting in his car for a little longer to avoid suspicion. Aaron seemed to find your eyes in moments of worry, and it usually only took a small smile or a passing touch of your hands that could easily be explained as an accident to calm him down. 
But he had changed last week, when an UnSub had managed to catch your shoulder with a knife.
It was a surface scratch, nothing a few stitches and a dose of painkillers hadn’t cleared up, and you could already feel the scab peeling off, but since then Aaron had been stiflingly overbearing at work. 
You shut the door behind you, already seeing the way he rubbed at his temple with calloused hands, and you knew the sigh was coming even before you heard it, low and tired, like he didn’t want this argument here. 
“What the hell was that?” You said, your tone clipped as you stared furiously at his broad shoulder blades where he still had his back to you, “Spencer did nothing wrong, he was just trying to help, and he’s totally right, we’d be so much more use with Morgan and Prentiss-”
“If you have an issue with how I run my unit, you can take it up with Strauss,” Aaron snapped, barely looking over his shoulder, “Until then, I expect my orders to be followed, agent,”  
You crossed your arms over your chest, and he knew by the way you’d gone quiet you were staring daggers at him. Taking a shaking breath, he looked at you finally, and felt his resolve crumble almost immediately when he saw how truly seething you were. So much so he didn’t even catch the hurt in your expression until you began speaking. 
“Is it just ‘agent’, now?” You asked, your voice cracking as you swallowed quickly, “It’s not honey, or love, or sweetheart? Or is that only when you want the girlfriend version of me.”
Aaron stopped, whatever witted and crass remark that had about to fly out of his mouth vanishing, and he wished the rest of the team would just clear out of the floor, because he wanted nothing more than to pull you in for a tight hug and tell you in every way he thought possible that he was sorry he was being so cruel. 
But he couldn’t. Because he could feel their eyes on the two of you from here. Here he had to be SSA Aaron Hotchner. Here he couldn’t protect you when creeps were coming at you with knives or stalking women who could easily be your twin. Here he had to stop himself from being so pliant under your touch. 
“You know why I can’t,” He said coldly, his eyes begging and weak, yet they were the only thing that gave him away. His jaw was tense and his brows furrowed, and to anyone else on the floor it looked like he was giving you a stern talking to. 
Except you just scowled, “Can’t be my boyfriend or can’t stop worrying that something is going to happen to me in the field?” You said, and his lips pressed together tightly, because sometimes he hated not being the only one in the relationship that was a profiler. Of course you knew what it was about, you’d seen it in his face when the two of you were being intimate and he caught sight of the bandage, how he’d been completely distracted and tense for the rest of the evening, “That’s what this is about, right? All of this for a tiny cut on my shoulder that’s going to be gone within a week?” 
“Two inches to the right and that guy could slashed your throat,” He snapped, the truth a sore spot for him, and you shook your head, throwing your hands up in despair. 
“How many hits have you taken, Aaron, huh?” You bit back, and he ground his teeth for lack of response, “It’s an occupational hazard, it’s not a big deal, I mean Reid and Penelope have taken bullets for us, I just think you’re being a little overprotective here,”
“I can’t lose you, can you not see that?” He snarled back, his voice rising so high with his frustration he felt his cheeks warm, and in a split second he looked like a wounded animal stuck in a bear trap, cornered and scared and waiting on the inevitable. 
Your mouth dropped in guilt, the fight dying out of your chest because you got it then, you got it why he was being so defensive. He was too slow to stop something from happening to Hayley, and here, right in front of him, was his sparkly new girlfriend risking her life like that wouldn’t be anyone’s worst nightmare. 
You felt terrible, and judging by the way he seemed to bite the inside of his cheek, he did too. Perhaps for shouting at you, perhaps just for being too intense for a relatively new relationship, but before you could attempt to come to an understanding, Spencer opened the door, his eyes shooting between the two of you as the silence became a medium for your tension.
“Rossi wants to know if you guys are ready to head out?” He asked sheepishly, waiting for another snarl of anger from his boss, only to see Hotch looking more like he had a sour gummy shoved in his mouth as he avoided all eye contact. 
“We’re staying to do the profile, Spence,” You said solemnly, and he seemed to not want to poke at a sleeping bear, nodding and leading the two of you out to the drawing board, flicking one last look at Aaron where he was sorting some files around his desk, most likely looking for something to keep his shaking hands busy. 
Sighing, you closed the door behind you and tried to ignore the pain in your shoulder. 
He thinks you’ve probably caught the subway home with Spencer by the time they get back. The sixth floor is quiet, his bag heavy with the reports he could easily leave for Monday morning, except he wants to take his mind off the fight the two of you had. He cuts through the middle of the desks, Emily’s coffee cold and stale, Spencer’s cardigan stranded on his chair. He thinks about how he could show the youngest agent he’s sorry, because he shouldn’t have snapped like that, shouldn’t have made him feel small just because you were so totally in the right to be looking at him like that. 
He was immediately confronted with your coat and bag when he opened the door to his office, the two of them leaning against his filing cabinet like they were waiting for him, and he thought it was strange until he saw the culprit, or more so saw your shoes placed neatly under the sofa, your socked feet peeking over the end of the cushions. 
His gaze trailed to your face, calm and smoothed out, like he hadn’t seen the way a frown marred your face that moment he’d left the office as you’d been consulting the giant map he’d pinned up in the round table room. You were fast asleep, one hand tucked beneath your head as a pillow, your knees squishing out to accommodate your body on the two-seater.
Aaron drew a deep breath, gently sliding his bag off his shoulder and letting it sit on the floor beside your shoes, his hand immediately reaching for your calf with a gossamer soft embrace, his fingers squeezing you lightly and dancing up the length of your leg up to your hip. His other hand found home on your head, caressing the roots of your hair as he murmured your name. 
He said it again, a little louder, when you didn’t stir, and it was only then that your eyes fluttered behind your lids. Blinking slowly in the low light of his office, his desk lamp the only source of beige glow, you smiled on instinct when you saw his brown, puppy-dog stare, kicked and hurt as he looked down at you. 
Which was when it came back to you in a shooting pain, the last time you’d spoken, the tone and formality, as if he didn’t know you at all outside of these four walls. 
“You waiting for me?” He asked, his hand continuing its rhythm over your crown, and you nodded under his attentive gaze. 
“I didn’t want to go home alone, I wanted to make sure we were okay, and I knew you’d come here,” You said, and he smiled with an exhausted expression like he had the weight of the world bearing down on his back.
“Of course we’re okay, honey,” He replied, his hand migrating from your waist to grab your knuckles, bringing them to his dry lips to kiss softly. He sighed softly, looking down to where your fingers meshed together, “I shouldn’t have spoken to you like that. Or Reid. But especially not you,”
You let go of his rough fingers to bring a hand up to his face, cupping his cheek gently so he would look at you with those mournful noir hues. 
“Aaron, I’m gonna get bruised sometimes. This probably won’t be the last time, and it probably won’t be the worst one either,” He grit his teeth like the thought of it being even deeper, in an even more lethal spot, made him physically ill, “But I need you to trust in me, trust that I’m going to do everything to come home to you at the end of the day, the same way you do everything to come back to me. Alright?” 
Aaron sighed, leaning in to press his forehead to yours as you nudged your nose against his. 
“You make it so difficult for me to think straight when I’m meant to be your boss, you know that?” He murmured, and there was something boyishly teasing in his tone as he did so, so much so you smiled with him. Leaning in, you kissed him softly on the mouth, your hand moving to the back of his head to pull him closer 
“You will apologise, won’t you? For hurting Spencer’s feelings,” You implored, breaking away from the embrace for a moment, until Aaron tried to dodge your question by kissing over your jaw. But you stood your ground, despite the fact you felt your eyes fluttering in pleasure, “Aaron, he’s sensitive,” 
“First thing Monday morning, I promise,” He said, though you half guessed it was just to please you, since he was already aiming for your neck, his hand grazing the hem of your shirt. 
“So, I know we’re in work, but I take it this is boyfriend Aaron I have now,” He hummed in confirmation, your skin pliant and warm under his lips, and he caught the splutter in your breath when he kissed your jugular the way you liked, “Okay well seeing as you’re boyfriend Aaron, I got to tell you, honey, my boss was being a total worms-for-brains today,” 
Aaron stopped, drawing away to look you in the face where you hid a snicker, and he quickly found the humour in it too as his fingers gripped around your stomach, “Oh, so it’s like that is it?”
You went to say something in rebuttal, only to feel his hands quickly start tickling your stomach, and you squealed in protest, grabbing at his wrists in an attempt to stop him. But it was no use. Aaron’s laughs, tired and groaning as they were, filled his office, and yours quickly symphonied them.
You didn’t even get a chance to tell him that Spencer definitely, definitely knew you two were dating.  
919 notes · View notes
doomedmoth · 5 months
Text
Better kind of best friend (part 2)
Pairing : Reader x Alexandra Saint Mleux x Charles Leclerc | Poly & bisexual fem!reader
Warnings : slight emotional cheating, obsessive/possessive/manipulative behavior, suggestive content/smut, fluff then angst then dark fluff, inaccurate racing calendar and school programs, polyamory, use of y/n, slight dacryphilia
Synopsis : When you left the UK for a year long art restoration program in Monaco, you mainly wanted to make some friends. What you didn't expect was to find your best friend on the first day. And then fall in love with her. And then get tangled in the web of Monaco high society as her boyfriend came back to town, unaware of your little affairs. What the fuck happened to you, you just wanted to make some friends...
Moth's prophecy💡 : Hi cryptids ! Thank you for being so supportive, here is the awaited part two with the arrival of Charles ! You can find part one here if you haven’t read it yet. For the sake of it being easier to read for everyone, the dialogues between Alex and Charles are written in English, even though they would speak French between them. We got some angst, we got some very light suggestive content, we got some manic episodes, and that should leave us with the tasty fucked up shit for the last (two lasts ?) chapters. Enjoy !
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“Y/N… I’m sorry I…. I have a boyfriend…”
In a fraction of second, the room felt very cold. You suddenly took into account the breeze from the open window, and the uncomfortable scratch of the hair curlers against your scalp, itching to get off. The taste of red wine on your tongue started to feel like a thick paste, making it hard to breathe, and as you got up and away from Alexandra, your head spun, as if you had been hit by a ton of bricks. You needed some air.
“Wait !��� Alexandra tried to hold your hand, bring you back down to the ground, but her fingers felt like fire against your skin, and not the enjoyable type. You tried to get away, so she rose up, closing the gap to you. “Please, listen to me… I’m sorry, I know I should have told you earlier…”
You could barely make out her voice with the sounds of the street below her apartment. And why was she looking at you like that, like a deer caught in headlights, like… Like she pitied you ? You felt sick.
“Yeah… Yeah, you should have.” You probably should have felt embarrassed yourself. Shameful you even tried something. But you quickly realized the sickness you felt was not due to shame or sadness, but anger. Two full months had passed, and not more than a day or two had gone by where you hadn’t been together. “Not once, in two months, did you think of mentioning it ?”
You heard yourself as if someone else was speaking. Thoughts swirling in your mind, replaying each of her words and action. Had you missed a hint somewhere ? Were you in the wrong here ? You could replay the movie a hundred times and still, you were sure you would find no flaw. All the nights she had fell asleep in your arms, all the kisses she had peppered your skin with, all the touches and the petnames, now you could see clearly how inappropriate they would have been for anyone with a boyfriend.
“I know, I’m sorry, I’m so sorry.” Her breathing got heavier and tears started coming to her eyes, yet you had never felt so little pity towards someone. “I didn’t want it to change what we have, and it all got so confusing so quickly for me, I…”
“Because it wasn’t confusing for me ?” You raised your voice at her. You probably should not have, but she had just half-admitted to knowing her behavior had crossed some boundaries. “Please tell me you are in an open relationship. Please Alex… tell me you haven’t just lied to me.” You were pleading, begging. Don’t they say bargaining is one of the five stages of grief ? But her silence and shameful eyes gave you every answer you needed.
“I didn’t lie I… I just didn’t talk about it…”
“It’s the same fucking thing !” Definitely pushing her arms away from you, you started to gather your things from the floor of her living room. Thankfully, you hadn’t changed into your pajamas yet, you thought, or the scene would have been even more embarrassing.
“I didn’t know what to do !” Tears now rolling down her pink cheeks, she was following you around, words tumbling down in a rush to get her point across. “It all happened so quickly and he’s not home and you… You’ve been everything to me, please trust me ! Y/N, please stop !” She tugged at your arm once more, and cupped your face between her hands. Still crying, she planted a soft kiss on your lips, trembling, but this time, you were the one who pulled away. “I’ve never felt this way for a girl before… I’ve never had feeling like this for another woman, or anyone truly and-“
“Oh no.” You immediately cut her off and took two steps back. “No, this is not happening.” Throwing your things in your bag in a hurry, you couldn’t even look at her anymore or else you were sure you would end up either giving in or spitting to her face. “I am not about to be your little uni experiment, your fucking distraction before you go back to the safety of a man’s arms.”
Putting your bag on your shoulder and throwing her curlers to the floor, you gave her one last look, filled with all the anger and disappointment you could muster. So that was it, then ? Fuck it, even crying she was pretty. She had fallen back down to her knees and for a second, you saw yourself laying above her, kissing her wet cheeks, brushing her hair. Maybe you could have her for a night, a few days, a parenthesis of happiness until the man returned. It could not last, but it could exist. Scraping the last bits of this relationship like the bottom of a candle, and you would keep the remnants of it in a secret part of your brain until the year ended. But you knew the pain would be too much. And it wasn’t why you came here in the first place.
“I know what I’m worth, Alex. And I’m worth more than that.”
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“Ah cazzo per l’amor del cielo Y/N !” You hid yourself deeper under the cover of your bed as Chiara barged in your room. “Get out !” She pulled on the blanket, as you sighed and whined, too tired to fight. The ginger girl crouched next to you, eyes pleading. “Please make her leave, she’s been knocking on the door since we kicked her out and we can’t close, Marco forgot his keys.” She took one of your hand in hers to help you sit on the edge. “If you don’t, I honestly can’t promise she won’t come in during the night and I actually want to sleep for once. So please. Go.”
You nodded bashfully as she left the room, visibly annoyed. For two weeks now, all eight other students had had to deal with the awkward mood your friendship breakup had installed in the workshop. And that implied, unfortunately for your roommates, Alex coming in at unholy hours, begging to be heard. It was honestly a miracle no one had told you two to fuck off until now.
You pushed the curtains back as quietly as possible, peeking through the window at the entrance of the house. And indeed, there she was, banging on the door. You rolled your eyes and got up to put a coat over your pajamas. In your closet, not-so-well hidden, the scarf she had left you not long before it all went to shit… Your fingers brushed slightly over it, but you left it in place, and headed down the stairs. In the smallest living room, sipping tea and glancing at you, were your two German roommates. You mouthed a “sorry” at them, and opened the door, immediately pushing Alex away from it.
“Stop it before they call the cops on you.” You crossed your arms and took a good look at her. Fiddling with the worn-out sleeves of a sweater your recognized as yours, she looked exhausted. Dark circles under her eyes, hair a mess, she was far from the walking ray of sunshine you had known. You sighed, and started walking towards the parking lot a bit further down the main path, where you knew she had probably parked. “Come. We’ve bothered them enough.”
She followed without making a sound, her head down. You recognized her car, and sat on the small low wall facing it. She tried to sit next to you, but when she felt you move away, decided to stay up. You looked at each other for a while, your silence only interrupted by a few night birds’ chirps and the waves down in the bay.
Two weeks had passed since what you called in your head “the accident”. And if you had trouble living with the aftermath, Alexandra was taking it even worse than you. In order to protect yourself and allow to maybe, one day, recover something good from it, you decided to keep your interactions strictly confined to the subject of the workshop. Considering your two roles had very little to share at this point of the project, it meant that you were pretty much free to ignore her without being too much of a bitch. And lord knew it would have been too hard to stay mad at her with extended contact. Even right now, as she raised her doe eyes at you, you could feel your confidence faltering.
When you were alone in your bed at night, cuddling the plushie she had won you at the funfair, that was when you questioned if you were doing the right thing. After all, she had not promised you anything. You had lived in fantasies, daydreams of a romance carefully crafted by your need for love. Maybe she was like that with all of her friends. Maybe you could go back to being friends.
But no. She had confessed to knowing. To lying. To having feelings too. There was no coming back from this. Only growth and lessons. And right now, this meant for you some space.
“Well, are you going to talk ?” She opened her mouth, then seemed to reconsider, and you groaned. “It’s already 10 and I’m freezing cold, if you got nothing to say I’m leaving.” You started to get up but she put her hands up.
“Wait ! Okay wait sorry, please stay…” You sat back down, closing your coat tighter. “Thank you. I… Okay hm. Putain. Bon.” She took an inspiration, and you knew this meant she was going to talk non stop until her mouth ran dry. “I’m sorry about everything that happened, from our meeting to tonight. I fucked up. I omitted things and I lied and I did everything I could to stay in your good graces because I grew so fond of you so quickly I didn’t know how to deal with it. I really thought we could be best friends and you know I’ve never been really good with girl friendships I told you about it and I admit I may have crossed the line a bit, once or twice but-“ You could not help but scoff. “What ?”
“Sorry, please do go on”
“No, what, tell me ?” She raised her hand to you, and you did not take it.
“Once or twice ? A bit ?” Her lips started trembling and you stopped her before she could start talking again. “Alex. Friends don’t do any of the shit we did. Friends probably don’t sleep almost naked together and cuddling ! God damn it, you hand-fed me pastries in my bed, and you think that’s a little over the line ?” You heard yourself screaming and tried to take a deep breath, but the freezing air only made your lungs hurt even more.
“I’m sorry ! I wish I could tell you I didn’t know but…” She was shaking, from stress or the cold, you did not know. Finally she raised her eyes, and you felt like she was going to be honest, with herself and you, for the first time in weeks. “But the truth is I knew. I knew there could be something more and I wanted it too. I… I think I still want it. But there’s-“
“There’s your boyfriend. Honestly Alex, with all due respect, fuck off. How can you tell me that straight in the eye ? I’m not some homewrecker, and to be completely honest with you” You got up and took a step forward, pushing your index finger against her shoulder. “Even if you guys broke up I wouldn’t want anything with you.” Wow. Nice lie. But at least it seemed to hurt her in all the right places. “You should have experimented back when you were single like everyone else. You played with my feelings, knowing them and knowing we had no chance at anything serious. I did not have a say in this !” At this point you were very thankful you were the only house around, because you were fully screaming. “All I wanted was to make some fucking friends Alex ! And no friend in their right mind would have done what you did to me. So please, if you have nothing more than empty apologies and more pain to offer… please leave.”
“I really like you.” She breathed out the words in a whisper, and it broke the last loose screw of your sanity.
“And I love you !” There. Out it was, your great love confession, blown away by the wind of the sea, destined to forever belong only to the cries of the seagulls. In the end, it wasn’t so hard to say. “But sometimes it’s not enough. Love isn’t enough.” Turning your back to her, you thought this was truly the end. Nothing was salvageable from that night. “Goodnight Alexandra.”
You almost ran back up the parking lot to the gate of the house, through the living room now empty, and up the stairs. You were about to enter your room, but went to the one to your left, Chiara’s. Her window was opened and she was sitting on the edge of it, smoking a joint. Of course, she had heard everything.
“Trouble in paradise ?”
“Fuck off.” You went next to her, taking the joint from her hands. From her seat, she had had a direct view of the whole scene, sound and light.
You took a drag, almost immediately coughing. The weed was disgusting, not half as good as the one you were used to, and Chiara gave you a look of approval, a kind of “it’s the only thing I could find”. Without knowing how or why, you broke down in tears.
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When Charles finally hung up from his phone call with his manager, he raised his eyes to see that the taxi had already entered Monaco. The morning light was piercing through the clouds, shining on the wet pavement as to signal the end of the week-long downpour.
Finally home, he thought. He could not wait to be back at his apartment, and enjoy the rare two and a half weeks break before the last races of the year. The flight had been so long, his whole body was still sore from yesterday’s race, and still he was excited for the day to come. He would come home, and have Alexandra greeting him as usual, full of anecdotes and gossips to share. He would give her the gifts he had prepared, and then they would order from the Chinese restaurant they loved. Eat together, chill a bit, probably have sex. Then tomorrow they would go to his mom’s, take the opportunity to get a haircut, and maybe see some friends. He grinned at the perspective of a few days unplanned, going with the flow. Those were so rare nowadays.
The excitement made him tip the driver even more than usual, and he went up the stairs running, his bags almost scattering on the floor multiple times. But as he opened the door, still smiling, his excitement quickly faded. The apartment was completely empty, as if no one had been in it in weeks. He entered carefully, calling for Alexandra, but no answer. Every room still smelled of cleaning products, proof that except for the cleaning lady last Wednesday, it had been desert of any life.
Charles, starting to worry, tried calling his girlfriend multiple times, to no avail. So he threw all of his bags in the bedroom, changed his sweater, took his car keys and double of hers and decided to go check her own apartment. She was never in it, but maybe something had happened ? Thankfully, word hadn’t yet gone out that he was back, which means he was able to get his car out and through Monaco’s streets without any trouble.
The sight when he opened her door was even worse than at his own place. The usually immaculate apartment was in a mess, clothes everywhere on the floor, dishes piling up in the sink, and a good amount of paper bags from food orders scattered across the kitchen. In all of this, a few sobs could be heard.
“Alex ? Mon amour, where are you ?” Charles called out, voice cracking with concern as he navigated the mess in the apartment, searching for any sign of his girlfriend.
Finally, he found her curled up on the couch, hidden under a blanket, desperately sobbing and shaking as she held close a huge plushie he did not recognize. Charles rushed to her side, dropping to his knees next to the couch and wrapping his arms around her. She immediately pulled him in closer, drenching his sweater in tears.
“Hey, hey breathe love… what’s wrong, tell me what’s going on ?” He murmured and tried to hold her face to his, but she would always push back against his neck.
He finally managed to cup her cheeks and started to kiss her face, repeating again and again that she had to breathe. He honestly did not know what to do, he had never seen her so vulnerable, so… broken ? His heart shattered at the mere thought of what could have brought her to this point.
“I- I fucked up Charles…” Alexandra chocked out, her voice breaking in uncontrollable sobs. If she had managed to talk, she would now not let go of his arms, and Charles winced as she buried her nails in them.
“Baby tell me what happened, it can’t be that bad, it’s okay we’ll manage…”
Suddenly Alex’s eyes stayed fixated on Charles’, and her tears calmed down, along with her erratic breathing. She seemed to realize something, and started apologizing profusely. When she managed to talk again, Charles was completely lost as to what had happened.
“I’m sorry… it’s nothing, it’s just… It’s Y/N” Charles nodded. He was actually pretty excited to come back also for you, the mysterious new friend of Alex which she wouldn’t stop teasing him about. She supposedly wanted him to meet you, and Charles had been witness to so many attempts from Alex at making girl friends, he was glad she had finally managed. You seemed like a good person, from what he heard. “We… we got into an argument. We’re not friends anymore. It was my fault and it’s over.”
Charles’ brows furrowed as he helped Alex get out of the blanket. That was it ? Sure, you had seemed like an good friend to Alex, but she had lost a few friends along the way growing up, and none had ever provoked such an extreme reaction. He glanced around the room again, at the state of the whole apartment. But when his eyes landed back on Alexandra, he could feel the plea on her face to not dig much more.
Of course there was more to it. But what kind of friend’s argument would lead to someone completely breaking down like that ?
As Charles held his girlfriend to his chest, rubbing her back and slowly calming her down, he glanced at her phone, and decided he would probably get more directly from you.
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Well shit, it was fancy. As you entered the restaurant in the most luxurious part of Monaco, you started to really regret your choice of clothing. Even the lady in charge of welcoming clients eyed you up and down before raising a brow, clearly not impressed.
“I have a reservation ? Well someone invited me, his name’s Charles ?” You could feel yourself blushing as she gauged you.
She then gestured for you to wait to the side as she left towards the back of the restaurant. When she came back, it was to tell you to follow her.
Hidden behind the bar, far from any windows, were a few booths, carefully covered with flower arrangements and ivy leaves curtains. In the one you followed the lady to, a man was sitting, probably around your age, with light brown hair and piercing green eyes. Some curls were falling down on his forehead, and when he raised his head and smiled at you, dimples immediately appeared. Of course he was cute. Of course she had to have a gorgeous boyfriend too.
“Y/N ! Am I pronouncing it right ?” He stood up and thanked the lady, then gestured you to sit in front of him. You nodded and sat back down with him. “So nice to finally meet you ! I’ve heard so much.”
You couldn’t say the same, unfortunately, and the chuckle that left your mouth couldn’t have been repressed even if you tried.
You thanked him, and as he gave you time to scan the menu, you could not prevent yourself from stealing glances. He was dressed pretty casually too, which made you feel better about your own outfit, but you got the same feeling from him as you did from Alexandra when you first met her. There was something rich about the man, luxurious, in the way he presented himself, smiled and talked. And god, the more you looked at him, the more you could tell why she had fallen in love with him. This was the kind of guy you only ever saw in magazines, too pretty to be true. You felt yourself getting dizzy, and put your attention back on the menu. You were probably tired and in need of caffeine, why else would you feel so weak ?
Yet you had no idea he was doing the exact same thing, going over every little detail of your face and posture in his head. He had heard from you, sure, but not as much as he told, and most importantly, he had never seen you, even in pictures. Nothing could have prepared him, honestly. There was something about you, he wasn’t sure if it was physically or in the way you held yourself, that made his heart flutter. Suddenly he felt a bit shy, and completely unable to stop peeking at you. But he quickly reminded himself of why he was here, and chased his thoughts as far away as possible.
“Thank you for coming, first of all.” You gave him a polite smile and thanked the waiter for your coffee. “I’ll be honest with you, especially on the matter of why Alex isn’t here.” There it was. You shifted in your seat, a bit uncomfortable. The closest exit was in sight, thankfully, in case he made a scene or started to threaten you. You had no idea what he knew, and it scared you a bit. “I… I came home two days ago. And Alex was…” He sour laughed, and started playing with his spoon. “A mess. I think it’s the best way to say it. I tried to make her talk but… only thing she gave away is that you two had an argument ? And that it was her fault. But I’ve never seen her like that before. I… I would like, if you don’t mind, I’d like to know what happened.”
Oh shit. So she hadn’t told him anything. Well of course, lie by omission seemed to be her thing. Were you really about to be the one to break the news to her boyfriend, who by the way seemed like a sweetheart, that her girlfriend had almost cheated ?
He gave you an encouraging smile, and you gripped your cup tighter. Why did they have to look so much alike. Everything about him was warm, kind, you could not hurt him even if you tried. What would it bring you, to do that ? Break them up ? And then what ? She was too out of it to do anything good with herself on her own. He seemed like a good person. And you were not a home wrecker. Sure, you didn’t work out. But maybe they could. You were the problem, she hadn’t fully cheated, she still had a chance at fixing up her couple. Who would you be to deny her.
“I don’t have much more to say honestly. We had a disagreement, one of which you can’t work through sometimes. It’s okay.” You gave a forced smile, and Charles was confident in that instant that there was more to it. This kind of painful conclusion, he knew them too well.
“Are you sure ? You seem upset.” You crossed your arms and he felt like he had maybe pushed too far.
“Yes. It’s been tough but I’ll get through it, and Alex will too. Maybe we’ll work it out, maybe we won’t, that’s our problem I’m afraid. Sorry you had to deal with the aftermath.”
You saw in his pinched lips, in the way his eyes scanned you, that he wanted to press further. But you wouldn’t be the truth bearer. You had done enough. Alex’s commitment to honesty would be his only way of finding out. And it seemed he realized it, because he nodded, and thanked you.
You thought you were done, but he shifted the conversation to lighter topics, your life in Monaco, how the workshop was going. He seemed really interested, and you realized you hadn’t made as much friends as you wished because of your closeness with Alex. So you gave in to the attention. And you realized you craved it, especially when it came from people who seemed a life away from you.
“What about you ? Out of state often, I understood ?”
“Why don’t you take a guess ?” He rested his face on his closed knuckles, and you closed the gap to him, faking analyzing his face. This made him chuckle, and his laugh tugged at your heart in ways you weren’t sure you liked.
“You don’t look like a business man.” He faked an offended face, then winked. Were all monegasques raised to be teases ? “Out often and comfortable with money ? We’re in a private booth where the staff seems to know you… I’d say an athlete maybe ?”
“Bingo !” He made his spoon ring on the rim of your cup, and sat back against his chair. There was a coolness in the way he moved and talked, something mesmerizing.
You thought he was collected. Truth is, thoughts raced through his brain at light speed and the more you talked, the less he listened. If there was something they had always agreed on was with Alexandra, it was that being in a relationship did not mean you found everyone but your partner disgusting suddenly. They were honest about their admiration for other’s looks and personalities, both convinced it was part of the human experience. And so he tried to persuade himself that this meeting was just that, another girl he just found pretty. And interesting. With a smooth voice. And nice fingers. Whose hair would probably look gorgeous laid out on his pillows. And fuck, he thought. That was not good. Not good at all.
Before he would start blushing again, mind filled with unholy pictures, he decided it was time to leave. You were a bit surprised at the abruptness of it, but agreed, you had things to do too. As you stood up, he looked a bit embarrassed.
“I know it might sound weird but… would you mind waiting a minute before leaving ? Giving me a head start.” He rubbed the back of his neck nervously and laughed. “Everything’s already paid for I’m not trying to scam you ! Just… I think it’s better for you if we don’t leave together.”
You furrowed your brows, not really understanding the request, but sat back down. You were too tired to fight about that.
“Thanks, you’re a dear. You have my number, let’s stay in touch !” And just like that, he was gone.
When you left the booth two minutes later, as requested, you heard a commotion right outside the restaurant. You quickly walked through the crowd gathering on the side of the terrace and started leaving when something caught your attention. A kid, screaming a name you had heard not so long ago.
You walked a bit further down the square and looked back to see Charles in the middle of the crowd, being photographed by paparazzis and families, signing autographs and struggling to get out. When he finally did manage, he entered a slick black car which looked like a million pounds, and left without even glancing back at the crowd.
“Charles… Monaco… Athlete…”You entered the words in Google, and found him immediately. A Formula 1 Driver. A fan favorite, it seemed. “Alex you bitch you could have warned me that he’s famous…”
Still, his request had got you out of a very sticky situation, and you were grateful you would not find yourself in newspapers tomorrow. So you switched to your text messages, and sent to Charles a thanks for the heads up.
Unknowingly to you, he sat in his parking lot for ten minutes before going back to his apartment, staring at his screen and blushing like a teenager.
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Charles was tired. It had been more a week since his return, and Alexandra gave no signs of improvement, despite his tries. She would keep up the appearances in public, but made no effort at home, and avoided all friends or family gatherings he attended. And still, she would refuse to talk.
After he came back from having a drink with you, another one he did not tell Alexandra about, another one he had to sit out the excitement of in his car, another one that convinced him that you could be essential to making her feel better, because you made him feel good, he decided it was enough.
Alex was sitting on the couch, her plushie always glued to her, watching the cars go by. At least she had accepted to come back to his apartment. He brought her tea and took the plushie away from her, not without getting a whine in return.
“Alex, we need to talk.” She gave him her usual sad puppy eyes, but this time, Charles was decided to not let her manipulate him. “It’s gonna be okay, I’ll be here no matter what. But you have to tell me what happened. It can’t go on like that.” Finally she sighed and sat straighter on the couch, trading her sad eyes for the stone cold face she wore when he wasn’t around.
“Yeah you’re right.” She let out a shaky breath, betraying her anxiousness, then took Charles’ hands in hers. Finally, they would maybe be able to move on. Finally he might get back his lover. “I… I lied to you. About Y/N.” Obviously, thought Charles, and though he did not want to admit it, he had a small idea of why. She planted her eyes in his, and holding his hand tighter, finally said the truth out loud. “I never told Y/N about you. I never even told her I had a boyfriend. I should have been honest from the beginning, but it got confusing very quickly, and I didn’t want to ruin… I’d say our friendship but I know it was more than that.”
He knew it. It pained him to admit it, but he had had a feeling, and his instinct rarely lied. Now the only thing left was to find out how much had happened. Unable to speak up, he nodded to encourage her to keep going.
“I was scared of losing her and losing you. I told you about her because I thought if you two met, it would just be me and my two favorites people and everything would be great. I didn’t think further than that. But… but I knew she had feelings and I liked it, I liked having someone so… devoted to me.” That didn’t surprise him. Alex had always had a praise kink, worshipping her might be the fastest way to her heart. “And I guess I ended up falling for her too.”
As Alexandra’s voice became shakier, he knew he was touching the main subject. It was already a lot, he needed to process, but he needed the full picture for it.
“Mon coeur, I need you to be completely honest. Did something happen between you two ?” He saw her hesitating for a moment, before nodding, her gaze fixed on their hands still holding.
“Yes.” She admitted, her voice barely above a whisper. “We kissed… I pulled away but I didn’t want to.”
Charles finally pulled his hands away from hers and got up. He felt hurt. Betrayed. Used. He had been kept in the dark both by his own girlfriend and you, truly the butt of the joke. Yet he felt empty of any anger. He looked at the little decorations in the living room. They would be so easy to smash. Probably satisfying. Yet when he brushed his fingers against it, he only managed to push them back in their exact place, all perfectly symmetrical. Strangely, it brought him more comfort than punching something.
“Are you not going to say anything ?” Her voice was still shaky, he could feel she tried very hard not to cry. And the only thing he wanted was for her to break down so he could hold her as close as possible and kiss her tears.
“What does this mean for us ?” He turned back to her, and she tried to hold his gaze.
“I don’t know… I’m in love with you. I know you probably want to tell me to fuck off but I need to say the truth. This has taken nothing from us, from what I feel for you. If anything, I’m finally feeling better now that you’re back. But I can’t deny that I had never thought about… about me, and another girl, like I did with her. I’ve never felt this way, it was like my heart was so full it could explode. I don’t know what I wanted from it Charlie, I… Nothing good could have happened, I fucked up, and I’ll do my best to make it up to you.” Finally, she lost it. Tears streaming down her face, she looked exhausted. “I never meant to hurt you. I never meant to hurt anyone. I can’t loose you I’ll do anything but I can’t live without you Charlie…”
Charles sat next to her and she threw herself in his arms, sobbing. He could not tell her. What would he even say ? “No worries baby, I can’t even manage to get angry at you for almost cheating because I think daily of fucking the friend you had a homoerotic codependent friendship with ?”. Or maybe “I wish I could focus on reassuring you that I’m still in love with you but telling you you’re pretty when you cry is not a compliment my mom taught me ?”. In the end, he opted for kissing the top of her head and softly stroking her back.
“Okay Alex okay… calm down… We’re gonna manage…” He gave her hand a squeeze, and drying some tears with a finger, kissed her cheek. “We’ll get through this together.”
Unfortunately for Charles, Alexandra’s moods swings came back full force, and soon enough she was back to shaking in his arms, this time from despair, hands clenched into fists on her knees.
“Why… why are you so calm about this ?” She demanded, voice trembling and brows furrowed. “I’ve just confessed to kissing someone and you act like it’s no big deal !”
Charles knew all of this, knew he should be angry, and he barely stopped himself from chuckling when he looked at the little statues he wanted to smash against the floor earlier. But he felt a strange sense of understanding and compassion which only made him calmer the more he let in his own fucked up thoughts.
“It’s not that I’m not upset, mon coeur.” Charles said softly, choosing his words carefully. “I just think maybe now’s not the right time to talk about this. You’re clearly exhausted and you’ve already been very honest with me. You need to rest. And I need to process some things.”
She agreed, her shaking slowing down once more, and he finally convinced her to have a shower and get to bed. She did so without arguing more, and Charles went on his balcony, completely worn out. When he opened his phone, he was greeted with a message that made his heart jump once more.
“Thx again for the evening, it was so fun ! Hope you got home safely, xoxo”
Looking at the light of his bedroom that just turned on, he chose not to answer. The rollercoaster had been enough for today, he needed a rest too.
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Though he had struggled, Charles had managed to convince Alexandra he had no intent of breaking up with her, and even that going with him to the second to last race would do her good. The weather was still good in Qatar, she could see the girls, get spoiled and pampered. He knew it would take time to get her back, and maybe she would never be exactly the same. But he wouldn’t stop trying.
On your side, you had been forced to retreat to your bedroom with your computer as none of your roommates seemed to enjoy having the race on the living room main screen at 6 in the morning. You did not care much yourself, Charles had tried to explain some basic things to you before he left but none of it was familiar for someone like you who didn’t even have her driving licence. Still, supporting friends, right ? It felt weird to call him a friend. Just as it had felt weird for Alex. You groaned, thinking that each time, you had been the problem. Why couldn’t you be attracted to anyone else in the whole country ?
When your eyes laid back on the screen, you got reminded why. Because in his fireproof suit, sweating and winking at the camera, you had to scratch your brain with a knife to even think back of any men with as much charisma. Because his skin was soft and his hair smelt good, you knew it and you wouldn’t dare to say how. Because seeing behind him in the interview the girl you still were in love with did not diminish your attraction in the slightest. If anything, you almost threw your computer to the ground when the thought of what they looked like together kissing came to your mind.
When you came out of the bathroom, a few hours later, your phone was ringing. You answered with a smile to the man whose voice was filled with both exhaustion and excitement.
“Hey Charles ! Nice race out there !”
“Did you manage to follow everything ?”
“I did not remember shit of what you told me !” You laughed, and heard him do the same. “But you finished third ! That’s good in any sport, right ?”
“Yeah, good enough we’ll say, could have done better though.” You pictured him as he spoke, hands scratching the nape of his neck, a little smirk making his dimples appear. “Thank you for watching. I appreciate it.”
He sat on the side of his hotel bed, smiling like a child. He didn’t even know why he called you. He had plenty of people around to congratulate him. Yet it was always nice to know someone far thought of him.
“Charles…” Your voice was suddenly tinged with concern. You had seen the polite smiles and waves to the press. But you knew her, and you knew it had not gotten better. And you were done being the big girl, you needed to know. “Is Alex ok ? I’ve seen her on TV and she looks… well you know. Still not herself.”
He got back up and walked to the window, thinking of what to say. Though you had kept in touch since your first meeting, he hadn’t told you of Alex’s confession. Maybe it was time.
“Yeah… It’s been rough for her, hm… Y/N I’ve been made aware of some things and… now’s not the right time, but when we’re back in Monaco, with Alex, I think… I think we should have a talk, the three of us.”
Your heart jumped at the suggestion, guilt eating you out. So he knew. You looked at the stairs, echoes of your roommates’ laughter coming from downstairs. Yeah, you really needed some new friends, before you were about to loose another one.
“I- I’ll be there.” Charles thanked you and ended the call, promising to keep you updated. As he turned around, his own guilt trip was waiting for him in the form of Alexandra, who had just entered the room.
He braced himself for an argument. The new information of him talking to her… whatever you were for her, would surely trigger confusion, and anger. She would tell him that he was not better than her. She would probably put the blame on you. Would she try to hit him ? Mind drifting completely elsewhere, he thought it would be fun to see her try, before punching himself mentally to focus. But when she finally spoke, nothing could have prepared him.
“It’s not fair.” Her voice was breaking but she wasn’t crying, fists clenched. “It’s not fair that she’s not talking to me ! Why won’t she talk to me anymore !” She wasn’t upset because he had been talking to you. She was jealous your attention had been shifted to someone else. And as she paced around the room, Charles sat on the bed, thinking that the manic episode was about to start. “I miss her. I need her.” She came close to him and the way she held his shoulders and forced him to look her in the eye both scared and excited him. “And if my only way of getting her back is you, you best believe I’m taking my chances.”
As the day went on and Charles witnessed the evolution of his girlfriend’s almost-psychotic episode, he thought that maybe some of her ideas weren’t so bad. In the end, he wasn’t the only one who had been a little too obsessed with you recently. What if the way out of this for them, as a couple, was simply to give in ?
So he confessed to everything. Listened. Gave his opinion. Kissed every centimeter of skin he could and agreed with every idea she moaned out loud as she bounced up on him. And when she fell asleep in his arms, smiling, Charles thought that the price to pay for a ray of sunshine wasn’t so bad.
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Something had changed. You couldn’t pinpoint exactly what, but you felt as if you were nothing more than an antelope being hunted in one of those wildlife documentaries you used to watch as a child.
Why had you even dressed up ? The dress wasn’t comfortable and way too light for December, your hair was tied too tight, but at least the staff didn’t look down on you this time. When Charles said you looked gorgeous, you thought it was not so bad, and sat straighter.
It was your first time seeing the two of them together somewhere else than on pictures. They were dressed to the nines, and matching perfectly, from the black velvety outfits to the silver of their jewelry. It seemed Alex had finally managed to sleep, because she looked as good as the first day, as good as the hot summer nights, as good as the time you kissed her. Charles was keeping his hand on her thigh, and everytime he squeezed her, you felt like you were about to faint.
You tried to be cautious. Ordering alcohol to calm your nerves had probably not been the best idea, because at some point you weren’t able to remember if their voice had always been this sultry or if you were already tipsy.
They had apologized, both of them. Alex in great details, and this time you let her talk. To be honest, you were tired. It had been long enough. You missed your friend. When she said out loud every thought that ran through your head, your last arguments all flew away. Had the two of you not suffered enough ? Had Charles not been a great meeting ? There was so much more she wanted to share with you, and you only managed to whisper littles “yes”. She would be better, she said. She promised. The best of best friends.
And so when she touched your hand, you did not retreat. And when the both of them asked you what you thought, all red smiles and white canines, you barely managed to breath out.
“Yes, sure… let’s try being friends again.”
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Part 1 // Part 2 // Part 3
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Taglist : @sam-is-lost // @mangotaitai // @ilovechickenwings // @eroselless // @zreads111 // @crimson-spine // @inejismywife // @champomiel // @seoulie101 // @charizznorizz // @exactlycoralfox // @waitwhendidwegethere // @cluelessred3
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