#took a little bit of inspiration for the bird hiding from hiccup doing that with toothless in the books

[spinaroos-47]

Escapade - The Owl House Oneshot

Synopsis: Hunter has his first flight with Little Rascal, still on uncertain grounds with them, slowly building an agreement.

Alternative title, local witch almost gets punted into the ground/treetops

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The past few days had been tense ever since the little cardinal flew into his room. If Emperor Belos found them... He did not want to think about it.

But they could be the key to solve Belos' ailment. Palismen were wild magic, he could study about this, find more with them, hidden from the Emperor. The tough part would be convincing him...

And the little rascal was showing themselves to be a trouble maker. Always trying to run away from the castle and into the forest, trying to hide themselves on the hoodie of his uniform when he went out of his room to do anything. So many close calls, where everything could be discovered and ruined.

— Alright, palisman. — Hunter was sat on the bed, staring at the cardinal in front of him, staring back, curious. — You keep trying to escape, and almost getting us caught, but you... you are my palisman now, and I want to learn more about wild magic. We need to sort this out.

It felt a little silly, explaining all this to the small bird, but they hadn't taken their eyes off of Hunter, as if they understood every single word. He squeezed his hands, that ended up resting on his legs, looking away from the palisman.

— We're both risking a lot either way. At least you- Wait!

The cardinal had taken flight and went out the partially open window again, making Hunter almost throw himself into the parapet, reaching out. He stopped when he saw the red bird staring back at him. They hadn't flown away. They were there, tentatively near Hunter, but too far away to reach.

— Wait...You... aren't trying to escape? — his hand fell to rest on the exterior wall, still leaning on the parapet. The palisman looked as if they were waiting for Hunter to catch up, still staring at his eyes.

He turned to look onto the forest far away, near Bonesborough. The cardinal followed his gaze, and returned to looking back at him.

— Do you want me to go there? — He asked, hesitant, and the little bird chirped as if agreeing. He got up slowly, pondering about the possibility. — ...Alright. I think I got it. Just let me prepare for it.

— If we are going there, then at least I'll want to take the most out of this trip.

Packing up what he thought could be useful, he stared at the Golden Guard uniform, stopping himself, second guessing this decision. It wasn't what Belos would want, and the discovery that he had a palisman would be bad news for both of them.

...But he needed to learn more. For his uncle. He still packed the outfit, just in case. Another possible humilliation for not being recognized was out of the question, in case there was a need for that. But this could be also an advantage, not being recognized could help him blend in and not be caught, and be seen as a regular witch with their own palisman, and not the Golden Guard with a creature he shouldn't have.

And then a notebook, a cloth mask, some bandaids, everything he could need, inside the bag.

Lastly, he picked his staff, and the palisman's too. He felt them still staring at him out of the window, almost as if expecting him to get only one of the staffs, their staff, not the mechanical one.

— I am not taking any risks. I know how to handle this one better than yours. — He looked back at the cardinal. — If we're in an emergency, this could be of more use to us.

He was ready, although still slightly hesitant.

Sitting on the staff, halfway out of the window, feet resting on the wall, he looked over his shoulder, to his bedroom, to the door.

— ...We won't be gone for too long. It will be okay, they won't even notice we're gone. — He muttered, more to himself than anything. His stomach felt empty, still staring at the door, as if it would open at any moment. Just one wrong step and everything would crumble...

— No. — He shook his head, returning to look straight ahead. — This will be fine. We won't get caught.

The cardinal propped themselves on his shoulder, getting comfortable there, happily chirping.

They flew high, to avoid being spotted by anyone, they could see the entire forest from there in all its glory. He looked at the cardinal, unsure.

— Where in the forest do you want us to go?

The palisman moved to the front of the staff, observing the scenery, until they turned to one side and pointed their beak to there, turned back to face Hunter and then back to the spot, gently singing.

Hunter followed their directions, curious. As they went farther and farther into the forest, hovering so low they were almost touching the soil, he slowed down his staff, looking around. It was far from Bonesborough, out of reach from anything of the emperor's coven, and everything else, it seemed.

— I've never been to this part of the woods before... Is this where you came from?

They shook their head, letting out a small thrill, before perching on their staff. He stopped, hesitantly planting his feet on the ground.

— Is it here then? — He took the palisman's staff out of his back, wanting to confirm with the little rascal. They flapped their wings, happily singing, almost seeming like they were smiling. — Alright...

He put his bag near one of the trees on the small opening they were in, together with the mechanical staff. The sky was blocked by the folheage but enough light passed through to let them see with clarity.

— So...what now? — He asked, with the palisman's eyes at the same height as his, expecting something to happen.

And it did.

The palisman joined themselves with the staff and opened their wings, lifting Hunter off the ground with a single flap, making the boy shriek as they jolted upwards.

— Wait! Stop! — He was holding the staff for dear life, legs dangling as the ground became farther and farther away from them while he desperatedly tried to make it stop going higher and higher. The staff got slightly tilted, leading them to the trees, leaves and sticks hitting Hunter on the way, as he still tried to change it's course.

After getting back to a clearer part of the treetops, he managed to prop himself in the staff, holding it, as they plummeted to the ground, with no signs of stopping.

He closed his eyes tightly and made a sharp turn, making the staff stop abruptly, throwing him on the ground with a resounding thud, right on his back. His breathing was quick, heart still racing, eyes wide open now that he was amidst the grass and dirt.

Hunter turned his head to the palisman, who got out of the staff, hopping near his head. They looked...guilty, as Hunter slightly got up, supporting himself on his elbows.

— ...You did this? — His eyes were still wide open, impressed, leaning more towards the small bird, who hesitantly nodded. He laid his head down on the grass again, pondering. — ...So you wanted to show me what you can do?

The palisman nodded again, having laid down on the grass too. Both stayed there, quiet, as Hunter recovered, looking up at the leaves, messy hair and with some folheage and sticks stuck here and there, face scratched.

— ...You haven't done this in a while, have you? — He muttered, softly stroking their head. The only response he got were low chirps, closing their eyes as he pet them. — Were you abandoned?

He paused, slightly retreating his hand away from them. How could someone abandon such palisman? He roled to his side, reaching out his hand to them again, who hopped on his fingers, being brought closer to his face.

— You missed doing that, didn't you? We...we can come back here tomorrow to try this again. Earlier this time. I don't think it'd be a good idea to try this again now, but we could stay here a little longer, make it worth the travel. We still have about half an hour until the sun sets.

He got up, sitting on the ground, reaching for the bag, searching for something there, until he found the notebook, showing to the little rascal when they started looking at the pages, perched on his shoulder.

— It's not as much as I would have wanted... but it's all I know for now about wild magic. I shouldn't be doing any of this, but... Belos will die if I don't do something. I need to find a way, even if he doesn't agree with it. I'll... I'll see how I will bring it up.

He slowly flipped through the pages, filled with names of books, mentions of magic usage during the Savage Ages, even some attempts at the glyphs that human made, although to little success, he couldn't remember them that well. Picking up a pencil, he started to write.

— Palismen are a source of wild magic. It keeps Belos alive. That... That I know well. — He turned his gaze away from the cardinal for a moment, hesitant. — But there must be another way. It's becoming unsustainable, there must be some other solution. A permanent one.

— ...I don't fully understand why he declares that all wild magic is harmful. You...you aren't dangerous, or malicious. It hurt many people, but you haven't done anything really bad yet. It did made that to him, but how come everything related to it could bring the same harm? — He sighed, resting his chin on his hand, looking at what he wrote.

Running his eyes through the page, he was gently tapping the pencil on it, analyzing. The small bird perched themselves better on his shoulder, slowly closing their eyes, as he read and and re-read the pages on the notebook, planning what to do.

Some minutes later, not very far from there, as it slowly got darker, some soft rustling could be heard.

— I think we should go. — He got up, gently scritching the cardinal's chin. Picking up his things, he looked back at where he heard the rustling, slowly approaching it, staff in hand and with the mask on. — ... But it doesn't hurt to check what's making this sound.

Pushing away some branches and leafs, there it was. The Owl House. Belos ordered him to keep an eye on its inhabitants, the human being one of them, and there he was, right near it.

— I didn't know we were this close to it. Why was she on the nest with you and the others if it's this far from Hexside? She didn't have any staff, and i don't think she went there walking. — He wondered, watching the lights inside the house turn on, sillhouettes on the eye window moving. — Did you have anything to do with this?

The palisman perched on his arm, also looking at the house, letting out low chirps, ignoring his question. They were starting to get tired, and so did Hunter. It had been a long day. He sat on the staff, giving one last look at the house.

— We should go. It wouldn't be a pretty sight if the door spots us.

With a long sigh, he took flight once again, carefully avoiding the patrols in the sky, quickly gaining speed once they were close enough to the castle, sprinting to the window. It wasn't worth the risk to dwell on the sky near the building, even him being the Golden Guard, things could be easily mistaken from that far away, and he shouldn't be out at this time. Getting caught wasn't an option.

Sitting on the bed, he gently placed the sleepy rascal on the makeshift nest he made for them, on the bed, near his pillows. Picking up the notebook, he stared at it, before hiding it under the pillow. He couldn't risk it being found. It was already hard to hide the more risky books, switching the hiding spots every so often, but losing the notebook would mean having to start from scratch all over again.

...But maybe it would be the best. To forget everything about it. To get rid of the palisman. Burn all evidence of the glyphs he saw. But it hurt to consider doing it. He already knew so much, but not enough. Just a little more, just a little more was what he needed.

And the palisman... They might have been a risky creature, but even on just these few days with them, he grew attached. They would greet him every morning, before and after any patrols, missions, meetings or training. They were always there. They made the days less lonely, the nights less silent.

They could help him with magic, he could find out more about palisman magic, how it works and maybe could be a failsafe if the other staff couldn't help him. The thought of all the possibilities overwhelmed him.

He looked back at them, who was already fast asleep. Hunter smiled weakly, laying on bed, staring back at the ceiling. His back was still sore from the incident, pulling out the sticks from his hair. He stopped when he touched the burnt loose strand.

Kikimora had started to be more ruthless towards him, more than the usual. She would try to do it again, there was no doubt about that. But the palisman would make things even more dangerous. She couldn't possibly know he was who fought her in Latissa, he was safe about that, but she would put her claws on any dirt she could have on him. He had the dirt on her, the failed assassination, and he wasn't afraid to use it if needed. He just needed to play his cards right.

Things had reached a precariously stable situation, or so it seemed. There was so much at risk, and the Day of Unity inched closer and closer, Belos' got worse and worse, a new rebellion was starting to get on the radar of the coven, with a head witch being rumoured to be among the traitors.

He had to continue it. He couldn't afford to avoid it.

But at least he had a little company during that, a solace for the hard times to come.

And every help would be needed.

[dakotacrisis]

Trust Me, Trust Me

Because for some reason the writers will not give the Lukanette shippers what they deserve, we must take matters into our own hands. If you have not seen the latest ML episode this will contain major spoilers! You have been warned!

But other than that please enjoy this quick little fix-it fic for all you Lukanette lovers.

---

If Hawkmoth could get a new hobby that would be great. It really would be. Maybe he can take up bird watching or stamp collecting or origami. You know, just a little something that can take up his time so he isn’t interrupting one of Marinette’s dates for once in her life! She swore, if she had to miss another date because the butterfly man wanted some earrings she was going to hunt him down and skin him alive.

Marinette had made the decision to let go of her crush on Adrien and start dating Luka shortly after their trip to New York. She cared for him, loved him, but he was always just out of reach. Upon coming back to Paris and seeing how happy he was with Kagami, Marinette understood where his heart truly lies. It was the confirmation she needed.

It was hard at first given how long she had been pining after Adrien. He still held a precious place in her heart but every time she was with Luka it blended into platonic love a bit more. Her first step was to get rid of all the pictures of Adrien she had pinned up in her room until all that remained were some catalog snapshots in her inspiration book and a couple friendly group shots on her wall.

She was ready to move forward with Luka. She really was. Now if only she could get through a date without Hawkmoth interrupting it. The man had an uncanny ability to start something the second she was alone with Luka or when they had plans. The movies, ice cream dates, bike rides, concerts, she was missing it all and it tore her apart. She could tell it was starting to wear on Luka too. Not that she blamed him in the least. Marinette left because it was her duty but Luka had to watch her runaway from him dozens of times with little to no explanation.

Lies were becoming as easy to her as breathing and it sickened her. Luka deserved so much better than that. A few times she thought that maybe she should end both their suffering and call things off but then he would smile at her, play her a song, and kiss her forehead and everything would be right again. She couldn’t think of leaving him when he always welcomed her back into his arms with a smile. It was like his faith in her was unshakeable.

At least that’s what Marinette had thought. Luka was very trusting and understanding but everyone has a breaking point. Even someone as patient as Luka. Watching her boyfriend get akumatized because she couldn’t tell him the truth of why she always disappeared broke her heart. Having to fight him hurt even worse. Learning that the father he never knew was actually their favorite singer was jarring. Poor boy woke up in Marinette’s room not remembering anything about his akumatization or what he learned about his family.

That evening after Luka went home Marinette sat in her room debating what to do. The real truth was out of the question. Telling him that she was Ladybug would only put him and everyone she cares about in danger. But she had to tell him something!

She also needed to have a conversation with her friends because apparently, even after dating Luka for weeks, they still think she is madly in love with Adrien. Even if she was, so many people know about it at this point that she hesitates to call it a secret. The only person who never knew was Adrien himself! But that’s a problem for another day.

What she needed to do was talk to Luka. She called him up and they agreed to meet up under the bridge. He smiled when he saw her and it broke her heart all the more, that even after today he could still greet her with that warm smile.

“Hi, thanks for meeting me so late,” Marinette said.

“We did leave things kinda unresolved earlier, didn’t we?” Luka sighed, “A lot happened today and even though I don’t remember any of it I was filled in later. When I went home my mom was waiting for me and asked if I remembered anything from being akumatized. When I said no she told me who my dad is.”

“She did?” Marinette wasn’t surprised, if she didn’t tell him then someone else on the boat surely would have.

“Turns out it’s Jagged Stone.” He shook his head, “ My idol is also my dad. I don’t know how to feel about that. All these years I felt a connection to him but I thought it was just because we were both musicians. Turns it out it runs a lot deeper than that.”

“I can’t imagine what that must be like.” Marinette said, “Do you think you’ll talk to him after this?”

“I feel like I have to. I still have so many questions.” He looked back at Marinette and his smile returned, “Enough about all that though. What did you want to talk about?”

“Well now I don’t know if this is the best conversation to have considering what all you’ve already gone through today.” Marinette suddenly felt like an idiot. She shouldn’t be pushing more onto him when he’s already clearly going through a lot.

“Are you breaking up with me?” He asked, eyes full of careful trepidation.

“What? No! Of course not!” Marinette clasped his hands with hers. “Is that what you want?”

“Never. I just know that you’ve been missing out on a lot of our dates and…” He glanced down at their clasped hands, “I thought it might be because you were unsure about us. I miss you, Marinette.”

“I miss you too.” Marinette squeezed his hands tighter, “I want to tell you the truth so badly, Luka. It would clear up everything and then you’d understand why I do the things I do but I can’t tell you. It’s not because I don’t trust you but because it’s something that I know will only cause problems for you if I do.”

“Does this have anything to do with Adrien?”

“Absolutely not. This is in no way related to Adrien or my feelings or anything like that. It’s a lot more complicated than all that.”

“Can you explain it then? You don’t have to go into details if it is really that precious a secret but you need to give me something here, Marinette. I feel like you’re drifting further and further away from me and I can’t figure out what’s causing it.”

“The truth...the truth is…” Marinette swallowed back all the lies and looked into her boyfriend’s eyes. He had so much faith in her. He trusted her so much, she owed him at least this. “The truth is that I have a certain responsibility that I cannot neglect. I get called to take care of it sporadically and no matter how much I wish that I could take a day off I can’t.”

Tears threatened to spill from her eyes but she willed them back, “It feels like my life has been uprooted because of it but I can’t just back out of it either. I enjoy what I do but it always ends up hurting me and those around me in ways that I didn’t think it would when I took on this responsibility. Is any of what I’m saying making sense?”

“Marinette,” Luke pulled her closer, enveloping her in a warm hug, “It’s okay.”

“No it’s not! Because I can’t control what’s going on and it’s not fair to you and I just wish that we could have normal dates and be together like normal people.” She hiccuped, “I really like you, Luka. I want to be your girlfriend and go out on dates and have fun together but my responsibilities keep getting in the way. Everything is falling apart around me and I don’t know how to fix it. I feel like I’m way in over my head trying to keep everything from crumbling.”

“Hush now,” He rubbed a hand across her back, “It’ll be alright. I don’t know what pressure you must be under but you are doing the best you can. Even if the best you can is struggling that doesn’t mean you are doing nothing. You are doing everything you can at the capacity you are capable of doing it. That is all that can be expected of you so if a few things slip through the cracks it is not your fault. You were not being neglectful of your duties, you tried your very best. If you did nothing then that would be even worse, right?”

“But--”

Luka pulled back, grasping at her shoulders and stared hard into her eyes, “You are doing the best you can! Are you listening to me? You are doing all you can and that is enough! You are doing enough!”

Marinette started sobbing. The tears she had so desperately tried to keep away ran hot and wet down her face. Her throat was making an ugly croaking noise as she wailed and clung tightly onto Luka. She could barely breathe with how hard she started crying. Years of pent up sorrow, anger, and fear was flooding out of her and she couldn’t get it to stop even if her life depended on it.

Luka held her close and let her cry. He didn’t try to say anything to make her feel better. He just held her and hummed a peaceful melody in her ear. She wasn’t sure how long they stood there while she cried but when it was over Luka still did not let her go. Not until her hiccuping sobs quieted down into manageable sniffles.

“Feel better?” He asked, wiping the tears from her eyes. Marinette nodded. “Good. Don’t ever feel like you need to hide your struggles from me, Marinette. If you need to run off and do what you need to do then just tell me. I won’t get angry, I won’t try to stop you, I just want to know that at the end of the day that you’re okay. Dates can be rescheduled easily enough. I’m just happy to spend any time I can with you.”

“I feel like you’re being way nicer to me than I probably deserve.”

“And I think you’ve been denying yourself a lot more than you should. No matter what is going on in your life, Marinette, it doesn’t mean that you need to miss out on everything else. You can be upset and selfish. You should be. Bottling all of that up will only hurt you worse in the end.”

Marinette took a deep breath. “Well, I don’t have any other plans for tonight, did you want to do something?”

Luka smiled and kissed her forehead, “Anything you want, my melody.”

“Is it too late to go back to the boat and have a movie night?”

“Not at all,” He threaded his fingers through hers and they started the walk back to Luka’s house.

They were smiling and laughing the whole walk back. At the ramp to the boathouse though was an unexpected visitor. Luka froze, his grip on Marinette’s hand getting tighter.

“Luka,” Jagged Stone nodded to him.

“Jagged.” Luka said. His expression was unreadable.

“I’m sorry,” Jagged said, “Rock star or not I should have been around for you and your mother and your sister. I guess I felt too inadequate to be a proper father like you deserved. That’s not an excuse but--”

“Hey,” Juleka appeared on the ramp startling everyone. The girl was like a freaking ghost. “Are you my dad too or just Luka?”

“I’m your dad too.” Jagged answered.

“Awesome.” Juleka smiled and returned to inside the ship.

“Wait! Do you not have any questions?” Jagged called after her but Juleka didn’t seem all that concerned with the information. Luka wasn’t surprised. She never worried herself about who her dad was like Luka always had. She figured that she had the family she did and that was that.

“Jagged,” Luka said, “I’m glad I know the truth now and I appreciate you coming out here but it has been a long day. Right now all I want to do is sit down, watch a movie, cuddle with my girlfriend and process what all I’ve learned today. You are more than welcome to come by later this week but I really just need some time to myself to sort through all this first.”

“Yes, of course,” Jagged glanced at Marinette and his face lit up like the Eiffel Tower, “And are you dating Marinette? That is awesome! I knew you must have had great taste in women, just like your old man!”

“Jagged!” Luka’s mom shouted from the boat, “That’s enough out of you tonight! The boy wants to be left alone!”

“It’s alright, mom!” Luka shouted back. “Go back inside, I got this handled.”

Mrs. Couffaine sighed and went back inside, all the while still glaring at Jagged. “She’s right,” Jagged said, “I should be going. Enjoy your evening. And Luka, whenever you’re ready to talk I’ll be here.”

“Thanks,” Luka said, “I’ll be seeing you soon.”

With that Jagged dug his hands deep in his pockets and wandered down the street and out of sight. “You okay?” Marinette asked after he was gone.

“Still taking it all in but I’m fine. Now come here, I promised you a movie night.” Luka pulled her onto the boat. They settled down in the living room area. Marinette picked out a movie while Luka made some popcorn for them to munch on.

The opening credits began to roll and Marinette tucked herself into Luka’s side. One of his hands played idly with the ends of her hair. She sunk into his touch like a puppet whose strings had been cut. “Luka,” she whispered, lifting her head up to look at him.

“Hm?” Luka gazed down at her, “Need something?”

“Can I kiss you?” The questioned breathed past her lips.

“Yes you can,” He pulled her up closer. Their eyes drifted shut as his lips brushed against one another in the gentlest of kisses. Marinette’s insides fluttered happily as she met his soft lips again, kissing him deeper. He held her close tilting her head just so, so he could access her mouth better.

She giggled into the kiss. Her happiness unable to contain itself for even a moment. Luka chuckled too at her giggling so it rumbled against her lips. “What’s so funny?” he asked in a quiet voice.

“I’m just...happy.” She sighed, “I’m really happy here with you. And that’s the truth.”

[feeling-uncomfy]

Am I spamming? Yes. Do I care? Not really, I'm having fun so- sorry you're at the brute end of my restlessness.

This was definitely inspired by "paranoia party" by Frances Forever. Its a bop.

There are some warnings-

Alcohol mentions (aka Hawks gets drunk and makes bad decisions.

There's some implications of sexual assault, please be cautions while reading

There's also a blood warning

Don't know why my brain did this it just started typing so- hah

Anyways enjoy :D

Shigaraki sat up at a desk full of monitors. Kurogiri stood stiff at his side. "This is a horrible idea, pull him out." Kurogiri said, speaking with a tone he rarely used on Shigaraki. Shigaraki shrugged, watching Compress weave through the crowd as he declined his third offering of champagne that night. At this point, he was the only sober one in the room. "He's not a damsel, he'll live, Kurogiri."

Kurogiri bit back his first response. "You know as well as I do as much as he enjoys partying, this is beyond anyone's limit. People are blackout drunk in there." Shigaraki nodded, and he caught up on what Kurogiri was trying to explain when Compress pulled someone's hand off of his shoulder. "If anyone tries anything like that, we have Twice, Dabi and Magne ready to pull him out," Shigaraki pointed to Hawks on another monitor. "And we have the bird." Kurogiri shook his head, not enjoying this in the slightest.

Atsuhiro felt the same.

He enjoyed partying, he used to do it all the time in his youth. Though, after one particular night, he couldn't bring himself to even smell alcohol. He refused to go near it. Or leave his apartment, but that's his story. Now that he's surrounded by either tipsy or flat-out drunk people, Atsuhiro was ready to call it a night and go take a shower to try wash the alcohol away. He tried his best to swallow around the lump in his throat whenever someone's hand brushed up against his arm.

He thought he was safe when someone grabbed him from behind. Atsuhiro turned sharply, and stopped mid-punch. It was Hawks. "Ah, it's just you." Atsuhiro breathed a sigh of relief. "I doubt I'm going to be able to find our target like this, we should go-" Atsuhiro's breath hitched when he felt Hawks's grip tighten on his wrist. "Hawks." He hissed, turning back. One look at his face and Atsuhiro knew he was in trouble. Hawks was drunk. How did that even happen? Atsuhiro pulled back, freeing his wrist only to have his waist grabbed.

"Hawks." Atsuhiro tried again, grabbing his wrist. "Let go." Hawks didn't seem to want to, and pulled Atsuhiro to the dance floor, where there were people dancing. Atsuhiro was spun around almost like a doll. Hawks was laughing, and pulled him so they were chest to chest. If Atsuhiro wasn't aware that they were being watched, he might have actually stabbed Hawks. He was spun again, and let out a shriek as he was picked up this time. "Put me down-! Hawks!" Atsuhiro's cry was ignored as Hawks brought them back off the centre of the dance floor.

"Very funny." Atsuhiro said sarcastically. "Can you let go now?" Atsuhiro winced once again as Hawks dug his nails into Atsuhiro's waist. Hawks grinned, positively out of it, and pushed his whole weight onto Atsuhiro. They fell back, Atsuhiro's back hitting a wall. In one quick movement, Atsuhiro was caged by a pair of arms. Atsuhiro was vaguely aware of Hawks saying his name, his face buried into his neck.

Atsuhiro barely suppressed a wince when he felt teeth digging into his neck. This was too familiar, Atsuhiro barely remembered what happened that night but Hawks's weight on him brought a cold reminder of the whole thing to him, and Atsuhiro felt like he was going to get sick. "Hawks-" Atsuhiro froze when he saw Hawks's hand start to move. Atsuhiro wasn't going to give it a chance to go anywhere.

Atsuhiro shoved Hawks off of him roughly, sufficiently terrified for the night.

Backing into the crowd, Atsuhiro realised he was bleeding. He clutched where Hawks had bit down and looked around for the camera. Which one was he supposed to signal at again? Atsuhiro forced himself not to flinch at Hawks calling him again. Atsuhiro took off into the crowd, caution thrown to the wind. He didn't bother checking if the door he went through was the right door, he just needed to get away from the stench, from the people, from Hawks.

"What's happening down there?!"

Shigaraki yelled into the walkie talkie, Kurogiri glaring at the feather covering the camera. "Don't know, Magne went in." Shigaraki sighed, scratching at his neck harshly. "Good." He said simply. Dabi put the walkie talkie away, looking at Twice, who was peeking into the room. "I can't see her! She's right there!" Dabi looked in, and saw Magne dragging Hawks out, his feathers following. "What about Mr.?" Dabi glared at Hawks as Magne shook her head.

"Boss, Magne didn't find Mr." Dabi's voice crackled over the walkie talkie. Shigaraki leaned in. "Send Hawks back to the van." Dabi grinned at the clear threat in his bosses voice. He grabbed Hawks and started walking as Kurogiri's patience ran thin, and he left as well. Magne and Twice stayed at the door, peeking in to catch wind of Compress. Kurogiri looked through the building, thankfully blending in well as he looked.

Kurogiri heard Atsuhiro before he found him.

Kurogiri turned down to the right when he heard a hitched sob, then silence. Turning around sharply, Kurogiri saw Atsuhiro pressed up against a wall, covering his mouth and neck. "Atsuhiro-? Atsuhiro, it's Kurogiri." Kurogiri spoke as gently as he could, surprisingly able to surpress his anger. Atsuhiro didn't answer, wiping his tears away sufficiently and grinning weakly up at him. "Kurogiri, I-" Kurogiri waited as Atsuhiro took a shaky breath. "I didn't see you there."

"Are you hurt? What happened down there?" Kurogiri stood over Atsuhiro, watching him curl into himself as he got closer. "Nothing, it was just a little hiccup." Atsuhiro laughed weakly as more tears fell down his cheeks. Kurogiri wiped them away, and saw blood trickle down Atsuhiro's hand. Kurogiri stared for a second, and then registered what he was looking at. "Atsuhiro, what happened to your neck?" Atsuhiro didn't answer, and Kurogiri gently moved his hand. He saw the teeth marks.

"Who did this?" Kurogiri's voice turned cold.

Atsuhiro stared firmly at the floor. "Could we just go home?" His voice was barely above a whisper. Kurogiri shook his head. "Atsuhiro. Who did this." Atsuhiro forced himself to breathe, forced himself to keep his composure, or what was left of it. Atsuhiro muttered as Kurogiri wrapped his arms around him loosely. "What was that, love?" Kurogiri asked, and neither noticed the nickname. "Hawks. It was Hawks. He didn't- he was drunk." Atsuhiro's words were choked as he spoke into Kurogiri's chest, his grip tightening on his shirt.

Kurogiri took a deep breath, both to hide the will to hold Compress tighter in fear of scaring him more, and anger at Hawks. He was going to rip that man to shreds. "Okay, let's get you out of here, alright? We'll go back to the van." Atsuhiro nodded, face hidden as Kurogiri warped them back to the van.

Dabi looked over, and hid the relief he felt when he saw Atsuhiro. "Boss, Kurogiri has Mr." Atsuhiro looked over, and Kurogiri would've been impressed by his ability to seem fine if not for the rage flowing through him. "I'm not dead, no need to be concerned." Atsuhiro laughed, then winced, his hand flying to the bloody mark on his neck. Dabi frowned. "Did a dog attack you or something?" Kurogiri gestured to Hawks, and Dabi's shoulders raising was the only indication that he was surprised.

"Hawks-?" Dabi asked, voice sharp. Kurogiri nodded as Hawks stumbled out of the van, and Atsuhiro took an instinctive step back when they made eye contact. Hawks garbled speaking was interrupted by Dabi kneeing him in the gut. Atsuhiro let out a startled laugh, not expecting that at all. Toga ran out of the van, wrapping her arms around Atsuhiro and swinging off of him. "Twice was worried about you! You want me to cut up the guy who hurt you?" Toga grinned and pulled a knife out of god knows where. Atsuhiro laughed again, shaking his head.

"That's not necessary, but thank you." Toga didn't respond, and dragged him over to Spinner. As soon as Shigaraki joined them outside with Magne and Twice, they were off. Atsuhiro sat up front with Spinner, and thankfully, there was no issue getting back. Shigaraki sent the others on their way, and Dabi managed to convince him to wait until Hawks was sober to kill him, somehow. Kurogiri led Atsuhiro off to shower and away from Hawks.

Atsuhiro cleaned himself off until all he could smell was soap, and his skin was scrubbed raw, he got out only because Kurogiri called him. Atsuhiro was freshly clothed, dried and ready to drop dead. Kurogiri snorted a little when Atsuhiro faceplanted on the bed. "Atsuhiro." Kurogiri called softly, and Atsuhiro looked over. Kurogiri reapplied a bandage to the wound. "There, now you can rest, love." Atsuhiro nodded, eyes already shut. Kurogiri gently eased Atsuhiro back into the pillows, watching him curls around the blankets.

Kurogiri waited until he was sure Atsuhiro was asleep before leaving. He walked down the hall and tried not to yell when he caught Toga and Twice breaking into Atsuhiro's room. He held back a sigh and let them go. He had more important things to tend to. Like the murder of the number two hero.

Atsuhiro woke the next day to arms wrapped around every limb. At first, he panicked. Then he saw who was there. Twice and Toga were clinging to his arms, and Spinner was the reason he couldn't feel his legs. He was draped over both of them, sleeping soundly. Atsuhiro knew he wasn't moving any time soon, so he decided to lean back and wait for rescue. Unfortunately, he fell asleep before said rescue showed up.

Twice and Spinner were woken abruptly to Hawks screaming. Spinner was about to ask what the hell was happening, but was shoved off the bed by Toga, who proceeded to scream. "They're killing him without us! C'mon!" Twice started to shush her as Atsuhiro shifted around. The three of them froze until Atsuhiro settled again, comfortable. Spinner snuck out, holding the door open for the other two as the fled the room. As soon as Spinner eased the door shut, they were off.

Shigaraki was chasing Hawks through the halls, Dabi hot on his heels, literally.

Twice made a clone, and followed Dabi through the door. Toga threw one of her knives to Spinner and the two followed. Kurogiri enjoyed watching them, already deciding when and how he was going to kill Hawks. So he sat back and watched the others chase Hawks out into the streets. He enjoyed the panic over the media, it was entertaining to watch other heroes try get in their way. Kurogiri simply sat back and waited for Atsuhiro to get up.

[Something I feel I should explain is Hawks's behaviour- because I am aware of how different I'm writing him-

Hawks to me is the kind of guy who treats everyone aside from his chosen few people like shit. Like- if he doesn't like or if he doesn't have to respect you, he doesn't care about you. At all.

Tokoyami, Miruko and Endeavour, people like them that he likes he protects, he treats well and he adores them. People like Dabi, Shigaraki and Kurogiri? He has to respect them, it's the only reason he tolerates them.

His relationship with Twice is a little like his and Tokoyami's, Tokoyami and Twice treat him like a human, so he wants to make sure they're happy, that they're well fed and other stuff like that.

I dont think Hawks feels that way about Compress, therefore he doesn't treat him like that, simple as. The only reason he'd like Compress is because of his drive to do work and be productive instead of sleeping.

Which is also why I dont think his relationship with Dabi is great either, because Dabi and Hawks dont trust each other and all that.

Yeah idk- I just think it's pretty cool to explore Hawks's duality as a spy and how differently he'd treat people he sees as "good" and "bad"]

[little-diable]

Cardigan - Jasper Hale (angst/fluff)

Inspired by the song “cardigan” by Taylor Swift, enjoy my loves. xxx

Vintage tee, brand new phone High heels on cobblestones When you are young, they assume you know nothing Sequined smile, black lipstick Sensual politics When you are young, they assume you know nothing

Coming back to Forks after years of being away, left a bitter taste on (y/n)s tongue. A weird feeling began to flood through her veins as her (y/e/c) eyes found her fathers house, a car she couldn’t recognize was parked next to her dads SUV, probably the car of his new wife, somebody (y/n) had never met before, she had been away for a long time. 

The house still smelled the same, the scent of her fathers cigarets was burned into the wallpapers, coloring them in a dark yellow, almost brown by now. It seemed as if Melissa, her dads new wife, bought quite a few new furniture pieces, (y/n) knew, that it would take her a while to get used to this. A sigh left her lips as she stepped out of her fathers embrace, “I missed you, sunshine.”, a tight smile on her lips, the one that didn’t quite reach her eyes. 

But I knew you Dancin' in your Levi's Drunk under a streetlight, I I knew you Hand under my sweatshirt Baby, kiss it better, I

Her fingertips ran along the tabletop of the desk in her room, eyes dancing along the pictures that were still hung up on the wall, momentarily focusing on a picture of her and her ex-boyfriend Jasper Hale, a lump began to form in her throat, she had to force herself to look away. She was dreading seeing him and the whole Clan again, (y/n)s mind began to wander back to their last evening together, she could still remember the way he had kissed her one last time, the way her tears left a salty taste on her lips. 

It always had been her dream to leave Forks and study abroad, experience the European way of live, drinking wine under the Parisian night sky, wandering through the empty streets at night, taking in all the long forgotten history. 

It had broken her heart to leave Jasper behind, at first she couldn’t really understand why he had broken off things with her, “I’d only hold you back darlin’, you need to live, meet new people, without any boundaries that would keep you from experiencing new things.”, (y/n) could still feel how his thumb wiped away her tears, kissing her forehead, holding her close to his chest. 

And when I felt like I was an old cardigan Under someone's bed You put me on and said I was your favorite

Living in Paris for the last five years had been the best experience of (y/n)s life,  she met incredible new people, kissed a few french boys, not being able to go any further, without thinking about Jasper, traveled around Europe and truly got to know herself. Something she was extremely grateful for. But deep down (y/n) knew, that without Jasper Hale in her life, she wouldn’t be able to live her life to the fullest, her life had no true meaning without him by her side. 

“I actually haven’t seen them around for quite a while now.”, her fathers eyebrows were kitted together, he seemed to be deep in thought, trying to remember the last time he had seen any of the Cullens around. “Oh.”, (y/n) bit her lip, she felt her heart missing a few beats, did he really leave? She couldn’t blame him for it, but the realization that he left Forks, without telling her, did hurt. They didn’t really have any contact over the past few years though, only a “happy birthday” or a “merry Christmas” here and there, nothing special. 

A friend to all is a friend to none Chase two girls, lose the one When you are young, they assume you know nothing

(Y/n) tried as best as she could to settle back into her home, she enjoyed spending some time with her dad, even quite liked his new wife, but as much as she tried, something was missing. And that something carried the name ‘Jasper Hale’. 

She drove by his house a few times, felt her stomach churning as she looked at the abandoned looking mansion, memories came flooding back, memories of her leaning her head against Jaspers shoulder as they were sitting on the steps that were leading into the house, memories of her watching Emmett and Jasper wrestling around on the forest floor. 

Her heart felt heavy, she started regretting her decision of coming back to Forks, her life had been much easier as she didn’t know about them leaving Forks, (y/n) felt herself drowning in memories, it was time to reconnect with her old friends, maybe they could tell her something, anything. 

But I knew you Playing hide-and-seek and Giving me your weekends, I I knew you Your heartbeat on the High Line Once in twenty lifetimes, I

Sadly, the disappointing truth was, that nobody knew anything, Angela knew that Edward and Bella were somewhere up in Alaska, enjoying their new life with Renesmee by their side. (Y/n) guessed that the whole Clan moved up north, she felt pathetic, she had a life before the blonde haired boy stepped into it, had a life before she met the vampire Clan, a life before she fell head over heels for Jasper. 

(Y/n) now worked for the Forks high school, teaching teenagers French, trying not to think about the way she and Jasper hated their old French teacher, the way they had skipped this class from time to time, spending some one-on-one time in the forest, listening to stories about Jaspers past, (y/n) was desperate to know every little detail about his life. 

And when I felt like I was an old cardigan Under someone's bed You put me on and said I was your favorite

He had been her safe haven, managed to save her from her demons, managed to put a smile on her lips every time he was near, he gave her life a new purpose. (Y/n) was desperately trying to keep herself from missing him too much, tried to keep herself buys, tried not to think about the old hoodie of his, the one that was stored away in her dresser, would it still smell the same? 

To kiss in cars and downtown bars Was all we needed You drew stars around my scars But now I'm bleedin'

(Y/n) slowly began to live without thinking about the pale boy 24/7, slowly got back to her old self, she’d smile more often, would see her friends from time to time, actually enjoying spending some quality time with people close to her heart. She managed to take down the pictures of him, even though it took a while to get used to the now completely bare wall. 

“Dad, I’m going for a walk, I’ll be back soon.”, she called out to her dad as she pulled a sweatshirt on, tying her shoelaces while trying to find a fitting playlist. She almost missed the “stay safe” her dad had called after her, already out of the door, ready to go for a walk through the forest, trying to clear her mind. (Y/n) took a deep breath, inhaling the fresh smell, slight rain was pattering down on her sweatshirt, cursing herself for not looking out of the window, before leaving the house. 

'Cause I knew you Steppin' on the last train Marked me like a bloodstain, I I knew you Tried to change the ending Peter losing Wendy, I I knew you Leavin' like a father Running like water, I And when you are young, they assume you know nothing

It didn’t take her long to find the old familiar clearing, Jasper and hers ‘secret’ hiding place, a slight smile on her lips as she traced her fingers along the heart Jasper had carved into the tree. (Y/n) placed herself down on the damp grass, eyes dancing along the trees, focusing on the soaring fog, listening to the singing of the birds. "Thought that I’d find you here.”, it took her a second or two to turn her head towards him, (y/e/c) eyes finding golden ones, a sob left her lips as she rose from the ground, taking a hold of his awaiting hand. 

But I knew you'd linger like a tattoo kiss I knew you'd haunt all of my what-ifs The smell of smoke would hang around this long 'Cause I knew everything when I was young I knew I'd curse you for the longest time Chasin' shadows in the grocery line I knew you'd miss me once the thrill expired And you'd be standin' in my front porch light And I knew you'd come back to me You'd come back to me And you'd come back to me And you'd come back

His pale fingers combed through her hair, pressing her closer, eyes closed, “I missed you.”, accent thick as ever, he looked the same, just as handsome as she had remembered. “What are you doing here?”, hiccups left her lips, hands tightly clutching the fabric of his shirt, too scared that he’d leave her any time soon. Apparently Alice had seen her moving back to Forks, had seen her suffering, remembering her of the time Bella had to live without Edward, Jasper knew that he had to come back, he had missed his mate just as much. 

“Are you staying?”, she mumbled against the skin of his neck, eyes closed, trying to burn this moment into her mind, “do you want me to, darlin’?”, a teasing undertone in his voice as he dipped his head down and pressed a kiss onto her lips, butterflies erupting in her belly as he did so. (Y/n) could only nod her head “yes”, she kept on kissing him over and over again, feeling his skin underneath her fingertips, enjoying the way he pulled her closer. She was finally home. 

And when I felt like I was an old cardigan Under someone's bed You put me on and said I was your favorite

[jasoncnkam]

secret santa ‘17: jason & julius

the fruit and sap of the sycamore tree bestow immortality, and where willows do their weeping, strength and hope inspire survival of those who suffer from loss of harmony.

last christmas i got the opportunity to write for pansy and this year i have for frida, @juliefinn​. the writing i were supposed to have written got lost along the way, a week or so before today, so unfortunately i have not given this one as much time as i would’ve liked. i hope it’s readable, still, and more akin to magical realism than fantasy. if it happens that you like it, i’d love to revamp it for you. i hope your day have been well and that it will continue to treat you better.

also, thank you for this year, everyone. 

title: anastomosis word count: 2444

tw: medical-ish gore and body horror below the last asterism, though it’s technically inosculation. there are also mentions of death throughout.

“hello.” the greeting marbles off julius’ tounge as he stands between earth and dawn, his shadow cast on the stranger who underneath awakes from slumber. tufts of bluegrass shimmer across the red and golden of his tickled skin, embosomed by tiny specks that bewing his jutting shoulders and gather its shed down along his nape and neck. when julius with forethought stoop down by his side, the presumed spots come forth as something else—it is not dirt that the boy had blanketed himself with up to his waking. they are freckles, either from sun or birth, and as such they belong on his skin no less than the purple airfoil that a demoiselle has left for his eyes to wear and water neath each lid. julius’ gaze moves off his shoulder and gets caught by his stare, intent though mellow from doze. alongside the rising sun he promises much life past noon, for in his seize julius’ heart somersaults in-between its beats and then cheers loud enough for morning bats to flee the other way.

“i’m sorry, did i wake you?”, julius laughs as quietly as he may, embarrassed of how soon as well as long he fell into daze. he withdraws to settle down on folded legs. shallow wrinkles set in rows down the bridge of his nose when the grass tickles his sensitive ankles. “i thought you just had your eyes shut.” or so julius had hoped, for now his guilt to have awoken the boy is well enough for him to draw in his bottom lip and gnaw it raw inside his unstrung mouth. he fears for the worst until the boy forces himself up on languid arms and asks,

“who are you?”

reluctantly the teeth unloose as to let him nudge his wounded lip back in place to answer, “julius finnigan bo mccallaghan jr., and you?”

“...jason amadeo naim cankam.”, he returns at slower pace.

“where do you come from? i don’t recognise you.”

“you could’ve not just seen me”, jason avoids in such a narrow frame of time that it brings julius to withdraw his hands off the grass and onto his lap in a clasp. was it dumb to ask? the poor boy asks himself with no answer to drape his trust upon. why could it have been dumb to ask?

“yes, but… i have a feeling i’d remember you…” thereunder his fingers rush a hold each of the blonde curls that wreath around his ears. “i mean, we look alike, you and me. not wholly, of course… but enough that i think i’d remember.”

“we do?” 

julius confirms through a soft nod and replaces his curls with his mouth once again. meanwhile, jason draws further into himself to unravel the ball of his childhood’s yarn. 

“…i haven’t seen myself before.”

“never?”

“never.”

has jason, the poor boy, not once looked upon his own reflection? has has never seen the corners of his mouth muster a smile? his lashes shoo off cobweb and dew? his cheeks blush from the weakest breeze? julius looks back to when he was seven years young, feeling like royalty when he sat atop of his brother bo’s broader shoulders and held onto his head while elijah waded backwards in front of them, arms obtrude lest their little brother were to totter and fall. it was the day where he took his first breaststroke and floated. as was it the day when he met his own smile. he wants to help jason meet his, too, thus on two rifled limbs julius rises up, holding his palm open for jason’s to fold over. “come.”

“where to?”

“you have to meet yourself once in your life. come, i’ll lead you.”

doubt melts off jason’s nerves and he accepts his hand into his, fingers squeezing his fist. it feels silken to his own palm, which is fenced in scars, pink as white. presuming a flinch from julius he holds onto his breath, but once helped off the ground and dusting the sod off his pants, he is nudged back to breathing as he is lead off the meadow, into the grove of anemone, and step out on the other side on ankles, battered in bitemarks of nettle and thornbush.   

                                                           ⁂

“it’s okay, jason. you won’t have to get in.”

tethered a bit off the lakeside he sits, crouched and hugging a boulder as far as his arms their sinews can stretch. it is not to prefer before julius, but with freshwater up to his calves, jason regards himself as without rescue, whereupon he gripes, “it’s too much. please, come back.”

“...vic said that too the day he decided to come to the lake with us.”, julius paws onward, weighing his words with care as he climbs up the brim and afterward use the linen above his abdomen to dry the lichen off his palms. “though we hurried to, he had already run back home before eli, bo, and i got up.” of course they had followed, comforting their younger brother by the plum trees among wasps and dew. thereafter they had agreed to try another day and make tarts in lieu.

“vic?”

“yes, my little brother, victor. elijah and bo are our oldest… william and zebulon are our youngest, in that order.” he pauses. “…and john, lucas, and joseph… they were born before vic and after me.”

his teeth play then on untuned strings as they screech between sore gums, hidden from jason to keep him catching its cry with his sight. but he knows better than not to trust his gut, and thus he sets his arms free, using them for linchpins once crawling on his fours to the brim while julius watches him, curious until content.

“just... don’t push me in...”, jason falters while he grasps the earth on his fours and julius wades in once more, tiptoeing astern as to bait waves of neither water nor blood.

“i’d never.” sunlight slide down his thin fingers when all then of them point at the sky where birds come in garlands and no clouds are to be found. meanwhile, jason’s abdomen whines as he forces his curved spine to unbend—the farther away he can be and yet witness his own reflection, the better. julius, however, wants to admire up close. thus, he does.

“…do you see yourself?”

“yeah.”

“so what do you think?”

“...i’m not much to look at.”

“how about now?”, julius asks low when he, with no thought of clothing, kneels down before his reflection and it dissolves as his fingertips flit across.

“better.”, jason nods low.

“...because you see less of yourself.”

it was not a question but whilst pulling himself up, another nod is the affirmation jason offers before he hides his mouth against the shoulder, teeth nipping at its skin till it goes red. if he only knew how he sees him, julius mourns to himself but nevertheless forces out a bashful smile, though the words ease off his tongue,

“i think i like you better.”

his irises, warm with yellow in ultramarine, look back at his ones, pale in cobalt, and their throats lace in pollen, their bodies pulling one another’s into the water. soaking wet with sternum aglow they remain, hands on each other when sharing hugs as well as frolicsome shoves, bringing forth giggles which erupt like hiccups do. that is, until jason is to discover julius’ love for underwater breathing—submerging their bodies, charged with soft, visceral electricity that killed neither.

                                                          ⁂

“singing along?”, jason smiles to julius when they walk back side by side. a leaf of reed rests against his mouth, for soon before it had made a woodwind for his lips. but julius’ have already hurried themselves to silence and the lower one gets drawn into his mouth like it had been at dawn. he had felt sure that his hums were low enough to elude the other’s ears, but alas, he had been wrong.

“no.”

with eyes that mean no harm as they roll, jason lowers the reed and his gaze as his thumbs begin to rove. “can you tell more about your brothers? what are they like?”

“...eli and bo are much taller than i am. they grew alongside each other and after i had been born i dovetailed their arms in bed. and then our youngers brothers came, and i attached to them as well... but vic and will often sleeps along eli and bo so, who knows, perhaps they’ll grow tall like them… with zeb, it’s to wait and see.”

“and john, lucas, a—”

suddenly jason quiets. not from just anything, but from the three beddings which tread forward in the grass before them. by each one the wood anemones that has been spared from getting slept into the ground grow. all triplets, they are inseparable but the one to the right, the home of a tree whose height has been reduced to that of a stump. eyes turn aside, but not julius’. the thin membranes of his have gone glossy and his pupils miniscule. if they could talk, they would in snivels and on to sobs. but devoid of words for to utter, julius drops on his knees before the bed on the left, carefully places his two palms past its edge, and puts his mouth at rest against the cold earth.

“hello, john.”, he whispers midst a tone, threatful of lament. “please... don’t be afraid. you will meet us all and be held for as long as you want. i promise you that. your brothers love you… give a hug to our mother from us. tell her we love her, too.” a familiar kiss to seal his prayer is pressed with two more to come and hindered by five, spiritual fingers that have his neck locked in a lurid halo round his pileum, jason is forced to look further, and when he is to drop his jaw in apology another five push it shut, he is also forced to listen. “hello, lucas... we miss you. you don’t have to say that you ran back here. you can say that you fought, if you want. but please, come back. if just for a day, come back. we love you.” his brothers do not lie above. “hello, joseph.” nor do they, hidden under the wilted, torn wood anemones. “…what our father did to you was cruel… we love you so, little brother. nothing can wane our love for you… father did not understand this... i don’t know if he still do...” they lie underneath, “but he isn’t here. you won’t have to see him if you decide to come back…” in the roots of the dogwoods they were begotten from, “please, come back.” and since then have gone astray.

and julius, hiding his face behind his hand, hobbles up on two to cry to jason’s heart as neither of them return yet another night, though brimmed with stars to guide them.

“are you leaving?”

brought into a pinky-hold, jason swears him his reassuring, “no.”

                                                          ⁂

though they couldn’t know for sure, that evening they shared, vulnerable and hurting, had changed it all. the year has gone from late spring, on to summer, and at last, before wintertime, early autumn.

tears no longer ferment within julius, bringing forth fungi to strike his veins and taint him orange. nor is he today afraid that there might be some left, for he trusts jason as he has trusted him with tending for skin as it has shed, several times over. his scar tissue flickers now in peach and eggshell, and the skeleton that had once shattered in broken joints have healed to become pliable. during the summer they had run and stumbled with purpose to roll about, fished for mussels and their little treasures to make jewelry with, and above all, cried till all hurt got out to make space for the wonder right in front of them.  

“julius?”, jason interrupts the crickets as they lie—himself with his head on julius’ lap and his on a tussock for a pillow—amid the meadow where they first met. on both’s fourth, left finger, a silver ring of their size has been put.

“yeah?”

“i’ve been thinking.”

“...what about?”

“i want you be with you in winter as i was in spring and summer—as i am now, in autumn.”

“...jason, what are you saying?”

“that i love you, and that if you want me as i want you, you have me forever.” 

                                                          ⁂

cut with the first gash, jason and his wound slowly spatter apart. tendons stretch and muscles writhes and throbs whilst in aerial hands. sap leaves his tear-ducts and nostrils, his wrist gathering them all to use for thread besides those who julius steals with his lips, kissing them gone.

“i love you, honey.”, he hums against his cheek, bathing in the scent of honey and sandalwood one last time before theirs are to coalesce. “i love you so...” the blade drips his tummy crimson whilst it beats wild against its edge—closer to jason, his love. “i’m so happy to be yours as you are mine.” curls drape each face, blonde to caramel, which the lovers brush away and arrange, noses touching and teeth showing until their foreheads press and julius bids, “jason, do me as i’ve done you.”

and the second gash forms in wished hold, shroud atop of his own. pushed upward, a twincut is brought to be whereon their chests press close, ribcages of honeycomb cracking open for the nectar to run while their arms hold onto each others’ back—hearts unfolding and sealing their pleats upon touch. whilst jason smears the sap off his wrist and runs his fingers alongside their seam of skins, julius kisses him—his mouth a butterfly in frenzy—in line with his drawn stitches, needle casted in bumblebee fur and freshwater pearl.

this is their home—a meadow where wildflowers grow and mice, rabbits, and voles delve dens and cavort. here birds come to make nests for their young, as do deer on the ground and runaway cats until they feel ready to be found and return home.

here are his brothers, all eight of them—elijah and bo, twining each other’s hands and holding them high above their heads to bestow curtains of chiffon for the young to play with and hare through. william and victor, throwing edelweiss as far as they will go before they float down and strew around them. john, lucas, and joseph, smiling and blessing the earth with laughter that encourage petals to twirl and whirl.

and here is his sycamore, jason.

and here is he, his willow.

together at home, at last and evermore.