#tonic concepts

[royalnavyart]

how peaceful sleep is

your head next to his

no silence or fear

only him

[domanilofaccio]

Studio vibes

Matteo Buccoli Studio

[winloseorcharmed]

So all the old stuffed toys Melinda had growing up, her little Round Table and the toybox that she dubbed as "Toybox of Despair", she has all of that stuff still. It's in a small room in her cabin. She had meant to give them to her children but after getting the news that there is just so much damage to her womb (from battles with the forces of evil) its unlikely she can have children.

[toonytoodles]

In my head this is a very fun and colorful cartoon thats totally awesome

[bunnys-kisses]

Hello, can I order an powered sugar donuts,profiteroles and pull-apart bread and to drink an hard lemonade and Tonic Water served by Fernando Alonso with Stroll! Reader?

bakery menu!!

like the menu! then check out the menu! i'd love for you to submit your own prompts! i've been really happy by the influx of attention to my fics, and thank you for the lovely comments i get! it's really funny because i recently posted a stroll!reader fic with fernando, and i really like the concept. give it up for the newest rookie fernando alonso, he deserves some fun <3

powered sugar donuts: "marry me." + profiteroles: "come away with me. for a week, together. anywhere you want, we'll go." + pull-apart bread: "i love you" + hard lemonade: possessive behaviour

cw: smut/pwp, age gap (20s/40s), possessive behavior, stroll!reader, in love!fernando, doggy style, tease!reader

maybe this was a tease. you knew you had fernando alonso between your delicate fingers. the older man was obsessed with you. it didn't help that you were a stroll. the boss' daughter and the sister of his teammate. technically he was already family.

so of course he was invited to the house in montreal for a pool party during the summer break. you were still off from your courses at concordia so you were a frequent at the stroll house. and maybe you could've put on one of your swimsuits that covered your up a little more.

but where was the fun in that?

"he's staring." your brother said as he leaned in towards you.

"when is he not?" you replied with a shrug, "i literally could wear anything and he'd still be staring."

lance sighed and leaned up against the arm level patio table you were both by, "sometimes i think you like fucking with him. it's not fair, we are still on the same team."

you looked at him and gave a small pout, "i do love him, lance-y. don't worry. it's just a lot of fun to mess with him. it's funny!" you laughed a little.

lance sighed. the family knew about your relationship and while it was something to raise an eyebrow at. but, fernando was sweet to you. he was kind in a way that you hadn't had with other boyfriends, so your family was a little bit more forgiving.

"here he comes." your brother said before he picked up his drink and went back to the others at the get together. you soon felt fernando's hand against your bare lower back.

you giggled and looked at him, "hello, handsome."

"are you enjoying yourself? you look a little lonely." he said as his hand lingered while he got close to your ear. he intentionally pushed you further against the table, not enough to make a scene however.

"well my brother was just here so i'm far from lonely." you chuckled before you took a sip of your drink. there was something that you couldn't predict when you got involved with fernando. that his sexual thirst could be insatiable.

"you're looking a little warm." he touched your face and you smiled. you knew what that was code for. get out of the party and somewhere more quiet. it didn't help that your swimsuit left little to the imagination. and while no one would try anything you didn't want, you knew that fernando was a little jealous.

what a possessive old man.

you put your drink down and licked your top lip before you turned to go into the house. you remarked to your father (and fernando's boss) that you were feeling a little heated and were going inside to cool down.

once you were in your bedroom, you started to undress from your bikini. you felt warm all over both from the knowledge that fernando was approaching, but also because of the sun on your skin all afternoon. your heart leapt when he came into bedroom. you rested on your elbows and gazed at him lovingly. you were naked and fernando enjoyed the sight of that.

"now tell me, my love. why were you wearing that? if front of your family? in front of me?" he approached as he started to undo the front of his button up. his gaze was hungry on you, "you know, i love you. but i don't like to be teased."

you giggled, "i also know you want to marry me." you said coyly as you shifted further up on the bed to give your lover room as he took off his clothes and got into your bed. this wasn't the first time he fucked you in your bedroom and it wouldn't be the last.

he wrapped his arms around you and kissed across your features. his hands groped onto whatever skin he could. you squirmed a little against him as his lips found yours. the kiss was passionate and it made you run hot. you couldn't deny, fernando was hot when he got worked up.

there was something about an older man just being rough with you that made your core hot. he once told you tha your entire life you had been handled like glass. delicate and soft. but fernando wasn't afraid to mess you up a little. to watch your skin grow bruised from his spanks or decorate your throat with his bites. hear you softly moan and squirm. and a deep, dark part of you was excited by that.

fernando soon had you on your stomach with him behind you with his cock up against your pussy. you called to him, and he yearned for it. "i love you." he said, his voice heavy with want.

you buried your head into the pillow as he pushed himself inside of you. you'd have to be quick before you family started to question where the both of you were. even though lance was painfully aware (poor guy).

"no more wearing that bikini, alright?"he asked as he worked your sopping, achy pussy, "you don't need to make me jealous." he could feel the possessiveness in his gut.

your noises were small and muffled against the pillows. your back arched a little from the feeling. your heart raced in your chest from how it filled you. it didn't hurt that he was impressive between the legs. he was unlike any man you had ever been with.

you held onto the covers under you and arched your back a little more from the feeling of him. you panted heavily as you felt the heat lead to sweat on your skin. he continued to thrust and you felt the stammer in your chest. it felt like all rational thought quickly turned off as he fucked you.

there was little time for gentle pleasantries, but the last thing you needed was your dear family catching you in the act with a man much older than you. you clawed at the covers.

"fernando." you whined.

"so beautiful." he said as he really worked himself against you. the bed creaked under you. it was nice to fuck you in your bedroom. where you grew up. he knew that long before you met, you'd often steal the racing magazines from your brother and touch yourself to images of fernando. you said you always wanted to fuck him with his driving suit on. even rub your slick pussy up against his helmet.

but he'd rather have the taste of your pussy in his beard as he got ready to race. he bullied his cock into you at a quick pace and watched you arch your back with an insistent want. he watched your ass shake with each of his movements and felt the pleasure in his gut.

it wouldn't be much longer before he finished inside of you. your back arched further and he felt his cock clamp around your pussy. you made a soft string of noises as you felt the pleasure overtake you.

"i love you." you whined.

he responded, "i love you too. come away with me. for a week, together. anywhere you want, we'll go." he promised as he leaned in to kiss you on the middle of your back which made you shudder with need.

you came from his words and practically clawed at the covers as you panted heavily into them. you were just perfect weren't you? beyond measure you were perfect. and fernando knew that he needed to have you for a life time.

"we'll go somewhere spain? before the season starts again." you whined as he continued to fuck you. your brain felt a mess as he picked up the speed.

"yes, and you'll be the most beautiful woman in the entire country." not that you'd be seeing a lot of it, fernando would rather have you see the place from your hotel room as he fucked you up against the window. only the best for his beautiful girl.

a few more heavy thrusts and fernando finished inside of you with a heavy sigh. he could feel his heart rate climb as he pushed himself all the way in and painted your insides with him. it was hot and heavy and it made him groan through grit teeth.

you were a tease, but you were his tease. he slowed to a stop and pulled out before he groped your ass for a moment. he then leaned forward to kiss you on the back of your neck.

"we'll cuddle next time, but people might get curious. you cool off and i'll see you outside." he got up and started to get undressed.

you laid in bed and smiled with your head on the pillow. when you got up. you noticed that the bottoms to your bikini were gone and you wouldn't see them again until you saw the hint of blue peeking out of fernando's pocket.. as he casually spoke to your father. <3

[proseandpretrichor]

Entwined | Jinx x Reader

Word Count: 598

Warnings: none -> just a short little thought blurb I had to write so my mind would shut up so I can sleep

You were her opposite in every way. It was hardly fathomable– the crazed criminal somehow wooing such a quiet and kind person such as yourself. You did share her notorious ambitions, just existing as a simple botanist living in one of the few docile suburbs of the undercity. You were the type of person to leave bowls of milk and water for the stray animals roaming the streets, unlike your cloud filled mind of your partner often found too dazed by the whirlwinds of her own mind to focus on anything else. While she built mechanisms of chaos, you created simple melodies of plants into teas, tonics, and remedies. Often selling these little miracles for such a small cost it seemed as though you were giving them away for free, something that was nearly unheard of in a place like the undercity. And these products not only were affordable, they worked! They worked exceptionally well, whereas the working class of the Undercity were doomed to rely on shimmer to continue with the grueling pace of the labor demands to provide, to eat, and sleep in a sheltered abode, you offered a chance of true health, of hope, of rest, of peace. Naturally, those who knew you, cherished you, none more so than Jinx. While at first the coupling seemed confusing and odd it soon clicked and couldn’t seem to make more sense. Jinx protected you and cherished you away from the extortionists of the Undercity, seeking to take your gifts and extort them for profit. In exchange for no cost, you gave Jinx a real understanding of the concept of true love, healthy love, happy love – no strings or obligations attached. You accepted her as she was waiting patiently to understand her past, unraveling the strings that wove together the misunderstood woman who held your heart in her jittery hands. And when the pieces of the puzzle finally clicked and you stood back and made sense of the whole picture that made Jinx well Jinx, you didn’t cower away in annoyance or fear, but embraced all the parts of her, even the messy jagged broken fragments. Even though it seemed as though your intertwined existences seemed to cancel the other out, you didn’t try to change her or soften her. You allowed her the freedom to exist as she was meant to, and figure out her place in the world, even when at most times she seemed to want nothing more to destroy it and certainly did her best to. And she knew… she knew for every explosion made by her hands, you were somewhere else mending the cracks and sewing the holes into faded little scares. So it really didn’t matter, then did it? — is the conclusion most people end on. It didn’t matter that you two were so biologically different, not when somehow it made you fit together all the while better. Besides, it's not like anyone could successfully tear you two apart, not if Jinx had anything to say about it– and she certainly did, as long as she was breathing you would be by her side. It didn’t matter what the pair of you concluded the tasks of the day, you would find your way back to each other. Wrapped into an embrace, one that slowly recharged the energy the day demanded of the two of you, and in that little pocket of the Undercity, a place of the forsaken, there was perfection given to the most damned of all women. So perhaps that makes her all the more deserving of it, you decide. 

[yourlittlebunnyy]

try again -tamlin x reader

masterlist

summary: after a fight in the Night Court, Y/n seek refuge in the Spring Court where she finds a old lover again.

warnings: ofc none

w/c: 5k

enjoy🎀

"Are you telling me you want Feyre to destroy an entire Court-of allies against Hybern, dammit-just because of a love affair gone wrong?"

Right now you don't care much about the consequences your words will cause you, and you certainly don't care that you are raising your voice to the High Lord of the Court of Night. Rhysand merely stares at you with glacial violet eyes, his stern face painted with total indifference. Here is the one you hate: not your friend, but the High Lord. The one who reserves glances of superiority for you and makes you feel stupid every time you open your mouth. But it is not he who answers you, but rather Cassian, always the first to put Rhysand before everyone, before even himself.

"Speak more respectfully to your High Lady." You cannot stop your face from contorting into a grin. The concept of High Lady was invented by Rhysand and has no real value, you think, now they're going to resent Tamlin for that too? Besides the fact that Feyre has no political experience, hell, she wasn't even a Fae until recently, how do they expect her to lead a Court?

Mor, as usual interested in putting straw on the fire, speaks in a honeyed voice, "Are you still pining for Tamlin, Y/n? We thought that time was over." You feel your cheeks go flaming with anger. You want to respond, but Azriel, always the pacifist in the countless confrontations you've had with your friends, gets in the way. The blonde doesn't seem to relent even when the winged male tells her to stop, and your face shifts to Rhysand, who sits in his study chair settling more comfortably on the backrest, enjoying the show. There's no point in arguing, you think. You roll your eyes, and under everyone's gaze but without saying a word, you leave the room.

You love your family, but sometimes they really seem dumber than a goat. You are not a High Lady, no, and certainly your job does not include ruling a Court, but you know perfectly well too that whatever Feyre is doing is wrong. But you don't blame her: Rhysand can be persuasive, and probably the destruction of the Spring Court was more his idea than the Feyre's, he's still attached to events that happened five centuries ago.

You just don't understand, given the delicate period Prythian is going through, why tear down an entire Court. One more ally against Hybern. And above all, mixing politics and personal conflicts? Never a good idea. Not to mention Mor, and Rhysand's attitude. And... everything. You are tired, and with a sigh you walk out of the huge building and down the main street of Velaris, taking more time to think. Normally you would have winnoved in your apartment on the edge of town, but you feel the need to blow off some steam.

Too bad your little walk doesn't help, in fact. Seeing people so carefree and naive makes you see red, because they have that chance, and the rest of the Night Court doesn't. You've always tried to push the issue, trying to get as many women and children into Velaris as possible, but Rhysand has always been very firm about the rules. Slowly you realize that maybe they are not friends, or even family, as you allowed yourself to call them years ago. You don't share their choices, their ways, their governance. You don't share any thoughts. But you are stuck. Where could you possibly go?

You arrive home and the first thing you do is undress and prepare a hot bath. Once you are done, with only a towel you head into the small kitchen, determined to make yourself some tea and take a tonic to sleep, exhausted from this day.

At your table you find Azriel. That's right, you had forgotten that you now share an apartment with him. You greet him by calling his name, and he looks at you curiously, almost worriedly.

"Are you okay?" He asks, and you're not quite sure how to answer. Normally you are not so unhappy, but today's fight hit you hard. It has opened your eyes. Feyre, here for so little, is already more important than you. Not to mention how they make you feel inadequate and stupid, as if your opinion doesn't count for anything. You don't respond, not trusting your voice, and simply shrug. Azriel gets up and takes the tea-making supplies from your hands.

"I'll do it." He says kindly, and you murmur a thank you, and decide to get dressed in the meantime. When you return from your room, tea is poured into a steaming mug on the table.

"Two teaspoons of sugar, just the way you like it." This brings a smile back to your face, and you begin to sip the sweet liquid careful not to burn your tongue. "You can tell me what's going on, you know."

You think about it for a while before answering, but eventually decide that you have nothing to lose. "I don't want to be here anymore." Azriel looks at you surprised.

"Do you mean... in this apartment, or...?"

"No. I want to leave the Night Court. I don't want to work for Rhysand anymore, I'm exhausted." You sigh, and tears sting your eyes. Azriel looks at you sympathetically.

"Don't you feel at home anymore?" You shake your head, and are glad you confided in him. If anyone can understand you, it is certainly Azriel. He nods, silence takes over, and the only sound is the jarring sound of a teaspoon used to stir the tea, hoping to cool it slightly.

"Maybe you should leave, then." He says simply, his tone serene. You did not expect such a reaction, but you are grateful for it. A bitter laugh shakes your shoulders. "And where?"

Azriel shrugs. "Everywhere. Anywhere you want." I suppress his words by really considering it.

"What about Rhysand?"

"I could... help you." He says finally, and his words mean so much to you right now.

"Would you really do that?" He merely nods. "I ... thank you."

Not long after, the tea now cold and the cookies you kept inside the drawer now gone, the plan is decided. You will contact an old friend at the Spring Court, and ask her for refuge.

Azriel will accompany you to the edge of the Spring Court, helping you carry your things and offering emotional support.

"Are you sure this is the right choice? Feyre..." You nip his speech in the bud with a hand gesture. You've thought long and hard about where to go. But you have no contacts besides this friend in other Courts, and despite your history with Tamlin... you can do it.

"I'll come and see you, you know."

"I hope so."

"Will I ever know what happened between you and him?"

The question leaves you speechless, your body stiffens and you freeze for a moment, but you are quick to recover. You take a deep breath before speaking again.

"We loved each other. But then... Amarantha came and..." You don't say more than that, you don't explain further, but Azriel understands and doesn't ask questions.

"So...we'll see each other, yes?"

"Sure. I'm counting on it, Az." And with a final hug, you turn and enter the Court of Spring without looking back.

The first few weeks proceed slowly, but positively. You get up in the morning when the sun is already high in the sky, a warm breeze caressing your legs as you step out onto the small balcony with hot tea warming your hands. Your friend had to leave shortly after your arrival, and she will be back in who knows how long, leaving her home all to yourself. By now you have built a routine: you wake up and sip the sweet drink, you read until lunch, you cook, and in the afternoon you take care of chores. But your favorite activity so far has definitely been going to the local market. It is so different from how you remember.... And yet so much the same. The air of fear you felt because of Amarantha has ceased, though a small trickle of it remains because of Hybern. The stalls overflow with fruits and vegetables of all kinds, colors and scents. It makes you smile with familiarity every time you pass by.

Today you woke up determined to make some treats, but you are missing some ingredients, forcing you to go to the market. You quickly slip into one of your friend's clothes, and grab a picnic basket on your way out the door smiling. There is no doubt that you are happier now.

"Hi, honey! What can I get you today?" Alyna, a delightful female with whom you have bonded a lot these past weeks, greets you cheerfully.

"Hey, Aly! Um, could you make a mix of all the fruit?" You ask quietly, and the fae is quick to give you whatever you need. You admire the way she fiddles with her hands, but at the same time she's conversing with you-she's really good at everything, you think.

"So how are you finding yourself?"

"Great, really great. I'm really happy with my choice." She smiles at you as she helps you arrange the food in the basket. "I'm glad about that. Come see me for tea once in a while!"

"Of course, how much do I owe you?"

"Oh, dear, but don't worry!" After further insistence, she allows you to leave her a couple of gold coins. Much more than she actually needs, but she deserves it.

You opt to take another tour of the stalls before heading home. One in particular catches your eye, the colorful clothes too beautiful not to be admired. You are so busy running the pink fabric under your fingertips that you hardly recognize the voice next to you. Your body seems to do so before you even realize who the male next to you is. But then it's clear as day: the crisp, rainy, earthy scent, so unique and delicious.The blond hair and the broad warrior shoulders. It hasn't changed one bit. Your whole body is stiff, but you take a deep breath. You prepared for this moment; you knew you would see him again sooner or later.

Things between you and Tamlin did not end badly, but neither did they end well. It wasn't even a relationship you had: you barely had time to get to know each other and fall in love before Amarantha yanked him away from you. You suffered a long time for something that never even happened. But you know there won't be another chance like that: Tamlin has loved, no-loves Feyre with all of himself. He has moved on. And so have you, of course. But he will forever remain a crack in your heart.

The merchant's voice brings you back to reality. "Miss, are you interested in the dress?" You look at her wide-eyed, confused.

"Excuse me?" The sound of your voice makes the male, who has remained unaware of your presence until now, turn around.

"I was asking if you were interested in the dress."

"Y/n?"

"I, um. No, thank you. Sorry for wasting your time." Your tone is confused, you feel Tamlin's gaze burning your skin as he approaches. You feel his presence all over you.

"Don't worry, dear." The merchant walks away, leaving you alone with him.

"Y/n... what are you doing here?" For the first time in fifty years you allow yourself to look into his eyes, and it's as if the world is falling apart and rebuilding at the same time.

"Tamlin..." Tears wet your eyes as you try to show strength in front of the male you loved so strongly before. And who has now lost his mind for another female.

"What are you doing here?" The anger in his face, in his voice makes you take a step back.

"I-I ran away. I didn't fit in, and an old friend offered me to stay with her here." He lets out an annoyed snort.

"Of course, they didn't send you, did they?"

"No. I--there's something you need to know, Tamlin, about Feyre. I'm not in the habit of getting involved in matters that I don't-" He doesn't even let you finish the sentence.

"Feyre and I are just fine, and I won't let your Court get in the way one more time."

"No-"

"No, Y/n. You made your choice half a century ago when you chose him over me. Now I am making my choice. You better get out of my Court, you are no longer welcome."

And so, as he came so suddenly, he goes away, leaving you standing there like a fool. You compose yourself as best as you can and set out on your way home, tears flowing freely down your cheeks in the meantime.

You didn't bake anymore. As soon as you returned, you took a hot bath and a sleeping tonic, which has now become your trusted go-to solution. You woke up a few hours later, in the middle of the night, the effect of the tonic wearing off. Thoughts invaded your head, and it was only after hours of tossing and turning in bed and the sun coming up by now that you decided to write a letter to him. You get up and grab a pen and paper, your hands trembling with excitement. You cannot let Feyre find out about this, or your whole plan will be blown. You wish you had Azriel by your side to give you advice.

Dear Tamlin,

I apologize for making such an impetuous introduction to your Court, and especially without official notice. I wanted to let you know that I no longer work for the Night Court and have left of my own free will, but I have some important things to discuss with you, and they concern the security of your Court. I hope you can understand, and I hope to see you soon so we can talk about it. In case this does not happen, I hope to get you permission to reside in your territory, and I warn you not to trust those close to you.

Best regards,

Yours, Y/n.

With a sigh you close the letter and don't even wait for the sun to fully rise: you leave the house with a light cloak to cover you from the cool breeze and take the letter to the nearest village messenger.

The reply comes sooner than expected. It is simple and informal, and you sincerely hope that everything has gone according to plan and that it is not a trap set by Feyre, or worse, Rhysand himself.

Meet me at the market this afternoon after lunch.

Tamlin.

You reread the small sheet of paper a hundred times before getting ready. A way of nostalgia invades your senses one by one, but you chase it away violently. You don't have time for this. You must help him save himself and save his own court before it is too late.

"Y/n?" Tamlin notices you first as you wait for him at the same stall as last time. You turn quickly, so fast that you lose your balance and risk falling, but the male has quick reflexes and catches you before that can happen.

"You haven't changed a bit." His wry comment lightens the air around you, but it weighs down the burden in your chest that you feel. However, you do not give it away. You are here for a very specific reason, and you don't even know how much time you have left. You cannot be distracted by events that happened years and years ago.

"Tamlin." You greet him. "I'm here to warn you." You don't reveal everything right away; you're still trying to figure out if he would be willing to believe you or not. You know it's not easy for him. His expression turns cloudy, but he invites you to continue. You send down a knot in your throat before you speak again.

"It's about Feyre. I-I know it's hard to believe, but she didn't come back to you. Rhysand appointed her as High Lady, and you let her into your territory as a spy for the Night Court. She will destroy you, you can't-. you can't-we can't afford that in a time of war." You talk so fast that you stumble over the words occasionally, not stopping to breathe even once. Tamlin is almost tempted to invite you to breathe and explain more calmly, but your words cloud his eyes with anger.

"You... you-" He cannot even find the words to tell you after such a revelation.

"No, you have to believe me. Maybe-let me show you." Your tone is almost pleading, and at this point there would be no point in denying it to you. Tamlin knows you: you may have chosen him fifty years ago, but you have never been a liar.

You show him everything you can. It's been a long time since you've entered his mind, and the feeling is so familiar that your heart tightens. You focus on what you have to show him, and you don't think about it. After what seems like hours, you get to the last fight that happened with Rhysand, and when you get out of his mind his posture is slumped, tired, exhausted. You feel sorry for him, just as Mor had said, and you feel sorry for everything he seems to be feeling right now.

"Is he really ... so much better than me?" He finally asks, and it's not what you expected. You want to hug him, to tell him that no, absolutely not, never, never could Rhysand be, but you hold back.

"No." You just say, searching his eyes with yours, but not finding them. His face is low, probably trying to hide what look like ... tears, from the people in his Court. "Tamlin..."

"No, no...it's all right. I'll send her away now, you can stay as long as you like." The answer should make you happy, but it doesn't. His tone is so pained that you yourself begin to cry. You find it very ironic, how you are crying for him but he is probably crying for another female.

He leaves without saying a word to you. Just like last time.

Months go by. The war against Hybern has been fought and you haven't seen Tamlin once again. You have not taken part in the fighting despite your training. You do not feel like seeing such death. But you know that the Spring Court did, and it was also thanks to them that Prythian won against Hybern.

Azriel has visited you a handful of times since then, and he has always been very apprehensive and kind to you. No one yet knows where you ended up, and you will never be more grateful to anyone than him for keeping quiet.

Your dear friend has also returned, and together with her you have managed to find a small apartment in the nearest village, allowing you to take more part in the social side of your life.

It feels strange to return to the market once the war is over. A feeling of peace and total relaxation fills the air and feels surreal to you. You are not used to it, but you welcome it with open arms.

"Hey, honey, how are you?" Alyna, who has become one of the closest friends you have, asks you.

"It's such a nice day today, it's better than usual, or is it not?" You say lightheartedly, a big smile makes its way onto your face. Not just because of the war, you realize. You've finally managed to build a life for yourself away from the people who were giving you misery. Only one small question mark remains in your life, and that is Tamlin, but you realize there is not much you can do about it. You wonder why you still can't get over him after all this time. Is it the same for him, too? Surely not. Surely he will feel what you are feeling now, but for another female. The thought alone is capable of hurting you, but you drive it away, focusing on the figure in front of you.

"Yes, finally the burden of war no longer hangs over Prythian, I would say. Would you like some coffee?" And how could you say no.

When you get home in front of your door you find a letter. It comes from the Court, but it is not Tamlin's handwriting. It is an invitation, you realize when you open it, you have been invited to a formal ball to celebrate the end of the war.

You are delighted, this makes you a citizen in your own right, but you are also weirded out. From the invitation it appears to be a formal ball, and although you were an emissary long ago, at the Spring Court you are nothing more than a simple peasant girl, who like everyone else gets her food from what she produces, why would you attend such an event? More importantly, will the Night Court participate?

You put the countless doubts to rest with a bath and a sleeping tonic.

The next morning, you head to the village with one goal firmly set in your mind: you need an elegant and appropriate outfit for the Spring Court. All the formal dresses you own clearly belong to the Night Court, and although they are beautiful and elegant, by the time you have tried one on you have realized that you would not be comfortable. And also, if others will be present you want to show them that you are now no longer part of their Court. That this is your home, and you are happier than ever.

You walk into an old weaver's store that you've been to a couple of times before and you've always been comfortable.

"Y/n! What a pleasure to have you here, what would you need?" The female greets you warmly as always, and you reciprocate with equal affection.

"I would need a dress for a dance. Something simple but nice." The Fae squares your figure with watchful eyes, and you can almost see the wheels turning behind her eyes.

"Try this on."

After a whole afternoon spent inside her cuddly little store, and no less than three delightful new dresses, you finally manage to get home. It seems almost out of place to have three such exquisite and expensive dresses in your hands in such a tiny, bare apartment, but you were unable to say no in front of such beauty, such art expressed in fabric. You go to sleep with still a broad smile on your lips, perhaps in spite of everything you would not have minded going back to the court events.

The next day you wake up and instead of your usual reading, you do household chores, since you were supposed to be in the Spring Palace in the evening.

You gather fresh eggs and feed the animals, pick various fruits from the trees, and finally take a nice refreshing bath. You spend the afternoon getting ready, and just as the sun is about to set, you transmute in front of the Palace.

The feeling that overtakes you is ... it makes your stomach clench in agitation. It has been more than fifty years since you set foot in its home, but it has not changed one bit. The gardens are immense and full of sweetly and delicately scented flowers, the hallways are filled with gold and riches on every side. A Fae you don't recognize at the entrance to the ballroom asks you for an invitation, and you cheerfully hand it to him.

You don't immediately feel comfortable when you enter, and you make your eyes roam all over the room looking for the familiar figures of the Night Court, but you meet no one. In fact, no one from other Courts seems to be present. Your eyes wander again and again, until they meet those of a tall, relaxed-faced male. Tamlin. He sips an amber liquid from a gold-decorated glass as he talks happily with Lucien. Oh, how you've missed him, too.

When he notices you, he seems to take his leave and you stare at him as he crosses the entire room to join you. Your heart beats so fast that you are sure he can hear it as he gives you a slight bow and takes your hand, laying a gentle kiss on your knuckles. He leaves you the spot where he placed his lips almost thrilling.

"Y/n, you are stunning." He says, smiling gently at you, and the way he acts confuses you a little. You don't want to be anyone's spare tire. But at the same time, it ... it's all so much the same, it's as if 50 years had never passed. You've been hoping Tamlin would compliment you, after all the effort you put into fixing your hair, face and dress, and now that he does -- you're confused.

"Thank you, Tamlin. To what do I owe your invitation?" You decide to be direct.

"That's exactly what I wanted to talk about." He moves causing you to step forward in front of him, lays a warm hand on your uncovered back, and guides you to the banquet full of treats, away from the center of the room. "Help yourself." You don't serve yourself, despite all that food being extremely tempting, but instead you wait for him to speak. He sighs. "I wanted to thank you. For your warning. If she had carried out her plan-I don't even know if this Court would have stood."

"Of course, Tamlin. From my side I wanted to ... apologize." No apology was planned, but you owe him one.

He shrugs, dismissing the question with his hand.

"That's okay, I hope now that it's all over ... we can keep in touch. If you'd like to come to these kinds of events." You don't answer, but your smile speaks for you. You don't dance together, but it's the beginning of something wonderful, something that already happened a long time ago.

After almost a month, another invitation arrives. It is a dance where the other Seasonal Courts are also invited, so it will be even more exclusive, fortunately you still have two more dresses and most importantly, there will be no Night Court.

You quiver and are even more agitated than last time, you feel like a little novice girl. You avoid drinking any more coffee in the morning, not wanting to increase your nerves even more than they already are. You again spend the whole afternoon getting ready and transmute once more in front of his palace, the honeyed scent of flowers welcoming you just as you remembered. Your heart begins to beat wildly. You enter the hall and your eyes automatically land on Tamlin. You missed him, you realize.

"Y/n! Good to see you." The blond-haired male once again makes his way to join you. "You look as lovely as ever." His eyes burn on your figure, bolder than last time. He hands you a colorful drink and you gladly accept it.

"You look lovely too, Tamlin." You sip the pink liquid in the glass, a sweet and sour taste invades your mouth. "It's delicious, what is it?" You ask charmed. The male chuckles.

"Something new from the kitchen, but I don't know what it is either." He seems to hesitate a bit, but finally speaks, his cheeks slightly flushed. "Do you want to dance?"

Your knees almost buckle. "My pleasure." You say all too quickly. He holds out a hand to you, and after placing the glasses on a nearby table, you direct me to the middle of the dance floor, all eyes on you.

You dance in silence all evening. One dance turns into two, then three, and then into a whole night. When the music ends by now there are only a few people left, you are sweaty and out of breath, but you are happy. As happy as you've ever been. Deep laughter shakes your body, finally infecting Tamlin as well.

"I haven't danced in a long time." You say once you've calmed down, almost as justification for your behavior.Tamlin merely smiles at you. You head to the banquet and he hands you a large glass of water, and you are eternally grateful. You drink it down in one gulp.

"So...see you, Y/n?" He asks you uncertainly. You nod smilingly.

Only a handful of days pass when a letter arrives. But it's not a formal invitation, no. You recognize Tamlin's handwriting and can still smell him in the air. Has he been here? You quickly return and toss the basket full of crops at the doorway, eager to open the envelope with trembling hands.

Dear Y/n,

I would have liked to tell you in person, but I couldn't find you at home. I hope it's okay to have asked your friend for your address. Be ready tonight after dinner.

Yours, Tamlin.

Your body freezes before rejoicing in laughter coming from your heart. You get right down to business: do your usual routine, bath, hair, and finally your dress. You don't wear an elegant one, but a simple, typical Spring Court dress that Alyna gave you. You do sweet braids and don't wear makeup, but use your favorite perfume. Your favorite perfume. Someone knocks on the door at dusk, and it only takes a few moments for you to open it.

"Hey, Y/n." His eyes linger all over your body, he runs his tongue over his lips, and you can't help but stare.

"Hi." You greet him simply, a shy smile on your lips and slightly rosy cheeks. It's a date, you realize.

"Thank you for accepting."

"Did I have a choice?" He chuckles, then shakes his head.

"Of course you did. But I wanted to take you somewhere." He smiles at you. He holds out his hand and you grasp it, one moment you are in the doorway of your apartment, the next you are on a meadow covered with pale flowers and a cool stream. You look around in wonder. You had missed these places, so much that you didn't even realize it.

"It's... it's gorgeous." You comment in amazement. He nods, the stars reflected in his eyes giving him a poetic air. You would like to touch him now more than ever.

"I would have liked to have had more time, with you." He says after what seems like an eternity spent staring at you and nothing else. You nod, step forward, and he does the same. The warm breeze ruffles your hair, and you make to raise a hand and fix it, but he is quicker and moves a strand behind your ear. Just as he did one night long ago, and countless other times.

"Tamlin..." He shushes you with a kiss. It is sudden and leaves you breathless. It takes you a couple of seconds to recover and reciprocate with as much passion, as much feeling. You both pull away reluctantly, your breath heavy and your cheeks flushed. You can feel her heart beating incessantly, in the same rhythm as yours.

"I've been wanting to do this ever since I saw you again." He says and makes you chuckle, because it was exactly the same for you. "I've missed you."

"I missed you, too. So much." You answer and kiss him again. And again, again, again.

You have been denied for fifty years and now you don't have enough, you want to take back the time you lost. You must eventually break away one more time, making you moan in frustration.

"Let's try again." He says with his lips still resting on yours, your breaths mingling together.

"Let's try again."

[void-dude]

Shapes and Pines AU FAN-MASTERLIST

THAT'S RIGHT FOLKS YOU GUYS GET YOUR OWN LIST BECAUSE YOU'RE DROWNING ME WITH CONTENT!

Canon content -> Masterlist 1

!Fanart?! (I LOVE IT ALL)

Money <3

Crossover time

Taking whats not yours

MARRIED LIFE

obsessed with this guy

Crossover time 2

⚠️ superior shape 🟪

Las Vegas shenanigans

Mornin' hun

Stan the greaser

Eepy sleepy

old man seduction

infected with this freak

Crime Husbands

Peas and Love

crossover 3

I think they are delightful

concept human ted

TAD MOTHER FUCKING STRANGE

He makes me laugh...

Human Tad Strange kinda

Mister Mystery Tonic

Human Tad Plus Euclydian Stan

Notebook doodles

TAD TAD TAD

12 long years and now he's back!

Tiny Tads

HOT TO GO

Square…shape of evil

Smash or pass

Human Tad plus tiny doodles

Human Tad but he's silly

They are resting and snoozing

Despite the scars

OC time?!?

Tad in theraprism?!

Human Tad and the best sweater ever

If you call my name there will be no answer

Let me kiss it better

Mary Poppins

THEY MOVE

Swooning over stan

SHAPES!!

Widdle baby square

Pine rumors

You took away my buddy...

Human Tad he's so fancy

Paper puppet oh my goodness

Boy why are you so

HOT TO GO

Happy and safe

He's sad :(

IT SHOULD'VE BEEN ME!!!

Squares and man

Did this actually happen?

doodles of young Bill and Tad

They're pretty, right?

tad strange but brain rot

They are sleepy

IM FINE

The boys are fighting

Birthday boy

Well that was tragic!

Humanization beam

What a boring white space

He loves him!

Human strange man

The third journal

Trust me

anxious wreck

eepy sleepy

don't look

save me..

I'm not Billy anymore

He kinda funny lookin

Ya wanna keep holding my hand?

Worlds collide

I feel totally normal about this man….

Billy’s caretakers can never catch a break

Human Tad again

Being disgusting on that boat

Is this a Relativity Falls AU?

Silly shapes

*randomly drops Stadley*

HES REAL

Them cooking!

brought "irl Tad" into being CW DRUGS

!FANFIC?!

Baby it's cold outside

Nightmare Tad

Did you forget our anniversary?

A stupid idea

Dipper & Mabel VS The Multiverse

Well… this is a tad strange

Keep your eye clear

Maybe...

And for the rest of the night, his dreams were quiet.

Then get your ass over here, big guy

I got game

[sgiandubh]

Greta's smile

For a flickering moment, that funny and fresh girl I so longed to see seems to be back:

[Source: the third Lauren of the week, but the only legit one: https://www.instagram.com/stories/laurenlyle7/3386613990920595818/?utm_source=ig_story_item_share&igsh=MW5nNHk3NnNtNG9tdQ%3D%3D]

and...

[Source, heh: https://x.com/displaceintime/status/1799779664141107252 - it is a reel, not a picture - for those who never get the concept of screenshot)

Oh, my: the Sibyl of Tydavnet can smile and even curse (wow! 👍). Best part? It looked organic. Could that be that they are reading us? I'd bet the farm and throw in Baby, the (adored family) Lab, on top. Sorry, naysayers - see for yourself: and yes, it must hurt AF to be wrong, right?

And yes, they clearly cannot stand each other anymore, right? Idiots will always be idiots, for sure.

[Source: https://www.instagram.com/reel/C7_iZxQMiHI/?utm_source=ig_web_copy_link&igsh=MzRlODBiNWFlZA==]

I have watched this reel very carefully about ten times. Slowed it down. I think the fleeting moment speaks volumes about the real state of play.

Let's have a closer look: the fan asks for a pic, lips purse immediately, a bit uneasy/unsure how to act, because the bearded minder is immediately aware of the unplanned photo opportunity. And hovering like Juliet's Nurse (if you read, you know what I mean - if you don't, that's not my problem):

Lips are still pursed and I think that guy's look is everything. The least one can honestly say, it's that he is not pleased. Not pleased at ALL:

His arm is immediately over her shoulders. It is an old, protective gesture. A reflex. We have seen it a bajillion times, both in the series and real life. You know what I mean and even across the street they know what I mean - but it's an inconvenient truth. As fuck.

His arms goes lower, grabs her and she does not cringe or look repelled. Quite the contrary: she immediately relaxes and leans in (that first smile to the fan was a bit tense). The minder has lost that one and he shows his disappointment. If that is fan service, I am the Pope.

I think you should watch that reel, too. Because I think it is very telling: no matter the pressure, the idiocies and the crap they throw at us and each other, they always seem to find a way back. And that, my friends, is very, very good news. So good, in fact, that I might pour myself a gin tonic (always Tanqueray). Sláinte.

[becausegoodheroesdeservekidneys]

if I remember right, a year or two ago you made a list of recommendations for the Edinburgh Fringe. Any recommendations for this year? Already got Steffan on the list, obviously

I did! Okay, okay, here's what I've got this year. Caveat: I personally have not been up there yet (I'm going in a few days), but these are things I saw in preview/have heard great things about.

Steffan Alun: Free Standup, but at What Cost

Venue 156: PBH's Free Fringe @ Banshee Labyrinth - Banquet Hall, 21.30-22.30

Back again! Eighth Fringe, this. The show is an hour, but that includes a 15 minute warm-up act, then Steff for 45 mins. He does this so that reviewers won't come and ruin the vibe.

Anyway this year he talks a bit about being Welsh and how he is therefore grumpy with Bristolian Tesco self-checkout machines

.

Jake Baker: Rule Breaker!

Venue 78: PBH's Free Fringe @ Canons' Gait - Lower, 16.30-17.30

I love Jake, he's lovely. He's a gentle soul and has an excellent delivery style; very warm and deceptively witty. Normally he goes with Just The Tonic and is given a searing hot basement in the sky that smells of mould for a room, but this year he's in Canons' Gait, which is much much nicer.

His blurb: A rule-breaker, a risk taker, a wave-maker and a convention-shaker – all phrases never before used to describe Jake Baker. But when a frustrating game of Alan Turing-themed Monopoly leaves him questioning the laws of the game, he finds himself turning that analytical impulse to bigger things.

.

Stephanie Laing: Rudder

Venue 300: Underbelly, George Square - The Wee Coo, 14.50-15.50

This show is particularly Tumblr-friendly, actually; it's described as 'neurodiversity-led'. However, it's a show with a content warning, although all the ticket page is saying is "themes" (insert Stephen Fry meme here); so, <SPOILER> she talks about withdrawing consent while sleeping with a FIB, and him continuing anyway. She talks about it in a very gentle way, avoiding Big Words, and it's very heavy on aftercare </SPOILER>

Her blurb: A comedy dance show about balance. Stephanie has a history of falling over a lot, accidentally kneeing herself in the face, and falling in love with total kn*bheads. In this show she uses a mixture of stand-up and dance to talk about bodies, sex, dancing, liking yourself, consent and healing. Also, there are cartoon bears and burlesque.

.

Erin McKinnie: The Faff Chronicles

Venue 108: Hoots @ The Apex - Hoot 4, 16.50-17.50

An Edinburgh local! Good solid standup for those who like such things. New-ish, but one to watch, she's very good. Don't be surprised to see her take off

Her blurb: What a faff! Erin McKinnie, a rising star on the Scottish comedy circuit, talks about faffing through early adulthood – from rogue adventures to living the "below-deck life" on cruise ships – she finds the funny in every bizarre encounter in this uplifting show that asks: Do we really need a life plan? Or... are we all just winging it? A brilliant, snort-worthy giggle-fest about exiting your 20s, facing life indecision and chasing answers for those big questions, all the while trying to convince your mother that this is a real job...

.

Alexander Bennett: Emotional Daredevil

Venue 24: Gilded Balloon Patter House - Coorie, 18.20-19.20

Dark feelings show with a really positive, optimistic message and a fun concept. It uses audience participation, but that's not compulsory, you're safe.

Blurb: I'm the emotional daredevil, and for my next feat, I need someone's help. A show about risk, for the unsatisfied and traumatised, from a Chortle Award nominee

.

Alex Franklin: Gurl Code

Venue 61: Underbelly, Cowgate - Delhi Belly, 20.25-21.25

Alex does a fun thing each year where she takes her publicity budget and rather than spending it on publicity, she hides it somewhere in Edinburgh and then reveals a clue to its location every day. This tells you something about her, I think

Her blurb: In 2024, trans girl Alex (me) started HRT. Now she (me) feels the most alive she's (me's) ever felt; and she wants to make you feel alive too, or die trying. A ludicrous, musical, chaotic, joyful show about the colours of the world becoming slowly brighter and giving people furniture via the tube. Also being trans.

.

Character Building Experience

Venue 49: Bedlam Theatre - Bedlam Theatre, 20.00-21.00

It's a D&D show - the MC Sasha Ellen makes a bunch of 40-minute simple campaigns and a selection of pre-rolled characters to do them, and then gets three comedians each time to play them. You know the drill. Good quality fun, and different each time, since you'll never see the same campaign/comedian mix.

.

2 Truths, 1 Lie

Multiple venues and times (search the EdFringe app or website to see them all), but I recommend catching the 3pm show on either the 25th or 26th August at Venue 108: Hoots @ The Apex - Hoot 1 for reasons I shall not share here (ooh, mysterious)

Fun panel-like show! Often MC'd by Steff, especially if you catch one of the 3pm shows. The format is:

Three comedians each declare a statement. Two are true, but one comedian is lying. The MC doesn't know the liar, nor does the audience. The audience gets to ask questions of the comedians; at the end, they vote on who they think the liar is.

(The prize for winning is a smug sense of satisfaction.)

.

Anyway, once I'm up there I will possibly have more, but currently, that's my list

[moonysreid]

headcanons on the re8 ladies when ur on ur period ✨

tw// periods, period pain, and mentions of blood

(this is quite short)

alcina dimitrescu

she is straight on the money. alcina knows you’re on your period before you even do - of course she notices the change in both your demeanour and even your smell. silently curses all/any higher power for the fact that you have to endure such pain each month. alcina does not like you to be left alone - she insists on using the desk in her room to work or if she has to leave then a maid is stationed outside the door to your shared rooms

bela dimitrescu

bela very vaguely already knew the concept of a period but was still quietly concerned at the sight/smell of blood coming from you. all but refuses to leave your side and will slightly panic whenever you hunch over during bad cramps. will definitely call donna and find out different ways in which she can help you relax

cassandra dimitrescu

how dare something cause you so much pain? at first she isn’t sure what has happened - she sees/smells blood and you in pain and decides that someone must pay for hurting you. is wholeheartedly against the fact that your body is ‘torturing’ you. she would definitely threaten a maid or two to find ways to alleviate your pain

daniela dimitrescu

again dani is not used to periods and will most definitely freak out when you’re bleeding and in pain - rushing to alcina panicking about you bleeding. i feel like you would have to explain it through a couple of times for her to calm down fully - but that’s not to say she’s not instantly trying to find ways to lessen the pain.

donna beneviento

all the comfort you could imagine. she is constantly trying to find ways in which she can stop you being in pain. you get the full works - teas, hot compresses, herbs, and tonics. she seems to be calm but if angies panicked running in circles when you groan in pain is anything to go by then she’s probably just pretending to be calm. poor donna just doesn’t like seeing you in pain

[elden-hicks]

A note for the fellow strugglers in TS1

Hey, it's Seth! I know how frustrating TS1 can be (considering it's age and being the first game in the franchise), so I am here to introduce a list of personal must have mods and programs, which I always use whenever I re-install the game to make it more user-friendly. The list itself is quite short, actually, since it only consists of my personal gameplay choice mods. So there's no building objects, deco, skins and heads there.

MODS AND CC

This calendar will report the day of the month to your sims and -- and this is amazing -- even introduce a concept of days off. Sims should have about every 6th and 7th day off. - THE ABSOLUTE MUST HAVE. It's in the painting section and costs 15 simoleons. Works a bit wonky with children, but otherwise a very useful mod to have.

Call work/give interview job phone plugins to give your sim a day off. - I use those mostly when sims have to take care of the baby.

A family mod by Gothi_family_4ever. - another must have in my collection, introduces the familial relationships in game! No more inappropriate relationships between relatives. It's a 0 simoleon painting, which you can delete once you've done.

A hacked frigde mod by the same author. - allows your sims to put their food into the refrigirator, call the household members for the meal, and requires the usage of products (like meat and in-game vegetables) in order to cook a dish instead of insta-paying. You kinda have to build a grocery shop for your sims, so they could buy the required products, I prefer to install the stalls into the pre-existing farm shop in Old Town area. P.S DON'T FORGET TO READ THE INSTRUCTIONS FOR THE INSTALLING BEFORE DRAGGING ANY FILE. As much as I love this mod, I don't, for example, use their cereal add-on.

The Elixir ExpressiBuy Computer. - a computer that allows you to buy any in-game buyable product (like vacation gifts, grocery, tonics, etc etc) in stock. They won't magically appear overnight but would be brought by a special courier npc. It also allows your sim to research logic, creativity, culinary and mechanical skills. I'd also recommend diving further into their site, since they have a lot of cool and unique gameplay content as well!

MagiCo's Bookshelf of Dimensional Storage - the official Maxis item, that was in the 'Get Cool Stuff' section. Allows your sims to keep their magic coins and ingrediends in special bookshelf storage, I mostly use it so the kids could get the ingredients for their spells from the adults. It is in the Magic section, btw

The Magic Mirror - the only outright cheat object that I have in my possesion. This mirror refreshes your sims needs, builds skills, friends, stardom, etc. Saves headaches when you are not in the mood to fullfill your sims' mood, ha-ha.

PROGRAMS

SimEnchancer 3D - basically a program that allows you to change the basic sim's attributes, including their heads and bodytypes. If you are familiar with TS2's SimPE, you'd have the idea how it works. NOTE: if you have to run your TS1 game as an administrator, you'd have to open it up in the same vein as well. And don't forget to backup your UserData files when you are working with it, just in case!

The Sims Creator - the official Maxis program for players to create some basic skins content. The program is only suitable to work with head and skins textures and not the meshes! Likewise, if you have to open the game as an administrator, you'd have to do the same with that program.

NEIGHBORHOODS

This section for the fellow premade enjoyers out there, who mostly played TS2 before and decided to give the local premades a chance as well

Here you can download the original UserData 1 and 2 if you want to reset your neigborhoods as they were if you had already played the neighborhood before and want to start anew. The Sims Wiki also gives you an instruction for how to do so.

And here you can download the additional Maxis families like The Hatfield, The Maximus, The Mashuga, The Snooty, The Jones and that weird agent White House familes. For some reasons, some of them refused to function in my game, so I had to install the empty houses and recreate them by hand, using the SimEnchancer and Wikia to give them appropriate skills and careers.

OTHER

Sims 1 Alternative UI - refreshes your game by a margin. I really recomend this one!

Well, that's basically it! I hope, my list would help you as well!

[blujayonthewing]

@antique-symbolism BEARING IN MIND that the ones I've invented or heavily modified are still works in progress... :D

Melliwyk's Nightcap

- 1.5oz brandy - 1oz white creme de cacao - 2oz whole milk - 2 drops purple food coloring - 1 dash lavender bitters - about 1oz heavy cream - pocky

Shake all ingredients except cream together with ice and strain into a chilled cocktail glass. Float a layer of whipping cream on top and garnish with a stick of chocolate pocky.

NOTES: Melliwyk likes brandy (when she drinks at all), a brandy alexander is sometimes considered a nightcap, and lavender-- well known as a sleep aid-- is among her many nicknames :D I wanted so badly for this one to be natively purple but I just couldn't do it, and unfortunately 'visually evoking Mel's actual nightcap' is part of the point, so, food coloring it is :') I originally did this with lavender syrup (I don't think I measured it; I wrote down 'a barspoon' but I just poured An Amount lol)-- I think the extra sweetness was nice, but on the other hand the lavender syrup did bring a kind of cloying lavender perfume flavor that the bitters avoids? I've thought about adding back simple syrup but I don't want it to get TOO unwieldy with too many ingredients 🤔 Also I've tinkered around a lot with the base but a standard brandy alexander just uses heavy cream straight up, and I think that actually might split into a (mostly) white foam layer anyway once it's shaken so I might try returning to that next and see how it works out. Also I thought the pocky would be just a fun lil bit of extra visual flair BUT it turns out the chocolate scent really adds a lot to the experience!

Presto!

5oz strawberry lemonade

1oz UV Blue Raspberry Vodka

0.5oz grenadine

1/4tsp purple luster dust

Starfruit

Stir ingredients together with ice. Garnish with a slice of starfruit and drink with a curly straw.

NOTES: The infuriating thing about this one is that I found it by googling 'purple cocktails', went out of my way to buy the blue liquor and grenadine, and then found out it's only purple because of the huge amount of purple food glitter (I wanted to add just a little hit of gold glitter instead but it looked a) not purple and b) really bad). BUT-- the flavor profile is exactly perfect-- bright, sweet, and snappy-- and WITH the luster dust, so is the aesthetic 🤔 This one needs tinkering. I think I could probably get it natively purple with just a little bit of blue caracao, without changing the flavor profile too much. I ALSO realized that obviously this one actually should be fizzy, so I'm wondering about adding a sprite or a club soda, or whether carbonated strawberry lemonade is a thing or...?

Goodberry

1oz raspberry syrup

0.5oz lime juice

2oz gin

2oz tonic

fresh raspberries

Gold luster dust (optional)

Shake syrup, lime juice, luster dust, and gin with ice. Strain into a glass with raspberries and fresh ice. Top with tonic.

NOTES: Gin derives its flavor from juniper berries, and the gin and tonic was invented for medicinal purposes; this raspberry g&t also ends up being the exact shade of pink that I've drawn goodberries, which are a little infamous in Juniper's campaign as being hated by Fengling, haha. IN THEORY I want this to be garnished with a sugared raspberry but in practice raspberries go soft about twelve seconds after buying them so I've never actually had a chance to do that, but I think it'd be cute :3 (to be honest the raspberries mixed in are also essentially garnish and I've made this a lot without them because we never have raspberries in the house, you don't really need em, they're just nice). Speaking of gin, I've also done a lavender earl grey gin cocktail in the past that I've always lowkey associated with Juniper as well, but I dunno how to make that as ~thematic~ aside from 'it just feels right,' lol. iirc that one is essentially just earl grey iced tea, lemon juice, gin, and I think lavender syrup-- I don't have an exact recipe cause I haven't made it in awhile but 10/10 would recommend

The Druidcraft comes from this post, EXCEPT that the original recipe calls for honey, but actually you have got to do a honey syrup instead or it just won't mix properly (I have a bottle made up, but it's really easy to just like. stick some honey and some hot water in a little cup and mix them together for a small amount). It's really nice! I also add a lil gold shimmer to this one, because I'm a nerd and it's ~magical~

By the way, these have all spiraled out of me thinking about the tavern themed home bar/ game room we want to build in the basement, and specifically thinking about how it'd be fun to invent a healing potion cocktail, which... I have still not done, lmao :'D I actually want it to be a shooter (you can down a potion as an action, after all), and the problemmm is that I'm a chronic overthinker; lots of drinks are red, it would be pretty easy to throw together something that's red, but I can't decide what kind of flavor profile I want it to actually have 🤔

god I wish I had a good camera and somewhere with good lighting to take pics of the dumb dnd cocktails I've modified/ invented

[callmedaleelah]

— Pinnacle [ tsukishima kei university au series ]

— i have a lot of regrets about that ; you’ve been avoiding him since you cried in front of him and the way he hold you so close still lingering in your head you’re so embarrassed you need to study harder

author’s notes : no mention of (y/n), written in second person pov, semi alternative universe, timeskip!tsukishima, college life, not proofread, english is not my first language

[ masterlist ] | [ ask daleelah go to box box 🐭 ]

It was late, and the campus was quiet, with only a few students still lingering around. The library, one of the few places that stayed open late, was dimly lit, and Tsukishima had just finished a study session of his own, the silence and solitude offering a rare moment of peace. As he stepped outside, his attention was drawn to a figure he recognized instantly.

You were just leaving the library, moving quickly as you answered a phone call. Tsukishima’s sharp eyes noticed the tension in your posture, the way you bit your lip and hurriedly tried to gather your things. He watched as you fumbled with your papers, dropping a pen and a few sheets to the floor in your haste. Among them, he spotted the familiar sight of your lab report, covered in his meticulous notes.

You didn’t even notice as you left them behind, too absorbed in your conversation to care. Tsukishima felt a strange pull to help, to return your belongings before they were lost or damaged. Without thinking, he walked over to pick them up, carefully gathering the scattered papers. As he straightened up, he noticed you standing by a vending machine outside, still on the phone.

He didn’t mean to eavesdrop, but your voice carried easily in the quiet night. The way you spoke, with a forced cheerfulness that didn’t match the anxiety in your expression, caught his attention.

“I was just studying with my friends at the library, Mom. We’re going to eat Korean barbecue now,” you said, your voice overly bright but betraying a hint of something else—maybe guilt.

Tsukishima knew you were lying. He hadn’t seen you with anyone else the entire time he was there. You had been alone, diligently working through your notes, trying to grasp concepts that clearly frustrated you.

“Did you do my suggestion to copy their notes and ask for their study references?” your mother’s voice was audible, even from where Tsukishima stood, her tone filled with concern.

“Yes, Mom. I did. Don’t worry about it,” you replied, the lie slipping out so easily that it almost hurt to hear.

Your mother’s voice softened slightly, but the pressure was still there, a constant undercurrent. “I’m just worried, sweetheart. You said you haven’t found anyone to partner up with in the lab. What if you fail the subject because you’re struggling to study alone? You have to keep up and match your friends' grades, you know.”

“Yes, Mom,” you said again, and Tsukishima could hear the sadness creeping into your voice, though you tried hard to hide it.

“Alright, don’t forget to take your tonic and all the vitamins every day. It’s good for your cognitive function and brain. You need to be doing everything you can to keep up with your classmates. I don’t want to hear about you falling behind.” she reminded you, her tone firm but loving.

“Yes, Mom. I get it,” you said, your voice quieter now, the energy drained from your earlier attempts to sound upbeat.

Tsukishima stood there, holding your scattered papers, his mind reeling from what he had just overheard. He had known you were struggling—anyone in the lab could see that—but this was different. The pressure from your family, the way you had to lie to keep them from worrying, it all added a new layer to the person he thought he knew.

The call ended, and you lowered your phone, letting out a sigh of relief mixed with frustration. When you finally looked up, you froze, seeing Tsukishima standing not far away, your lab report and papers in his hand. The embarrassment that washed over you was immediate, your cheeks flushing as you realized he had probably heard everything.

“You…” your voice faltered as you tried to find the right words, but none came. The weight of his gaze made you feel small, exposed in a way that had nothing to do with your usual lab mistakes.

Ever since that day in the lab when you broke down in tears, you’ve been avoiding Tsukishima like the plague. It wasn’t just because you wanted to study harder and avoid making mistakes in the lab—it was also because you couldn’t stop thinking about the way he hugged you, the way his voice softened in those moments when he tried to calm you down. The memory of it made your cheeks burn every time it crossed your mind, and the thought of facing him again after such an emotional outburst was too much to handle. You didn’t want to give him any more reasons to scold you, and more than that, you were embarrassed by how much he lingered in your thoughts.

Tsukishima, for his part, didn’t move closer. He just watched you, his expression unreadable, but there was a softness in his eyes that you had never seen before. “You dropped these,” he said simply, holding out the papers to you.

You swallowed hard, stepping forward to take them from him. “Thank you,” you mumbled, your eyes downcast, avoiding his gaze. The silence between you was heavy, filled with the unspoken truth that he knew more about your life now than you ever wanted him to.

“You lied to your mom,” he said bluntly, but there was no judgment in his tone, just a quiet observation.

You flinched at his words, gripping the papers tightly. “It’s… I didn’t want her to worry,” you explained, your voice barely above a whisper. “She thinks I’m doing fine. It’s easier that way.”

Tsukishima nodded slowly, his eyes not leaving your face. “It’s not easy, lying like that.”

You bit your lip, trying to keep the tears that threatened to spill over at bay. “No, it’s not,” you agreed, your voice trembling. “But what else can I do? She expects so much from me, and I… I don’t want to disappoint her.”

He was silent for a moment, taking in your words. Then, with a sigh, he finally spoke. “You can’t keep doing this, you know. It’s going to eat you up if you keep pretending everything’s fine when it’s not.”

Your eyes flicked up to meet his, surprised by the concern in his voice. “I don’t have a choice,” you said, your voice cracking slightly. “I have to keep going. I have to try, even if I’m not good at this.”

Tsukishima watched you, his expression softening further, though his voice remained firm. “You don’t have to do it alone,” he said, surprising you once more. “If you need help, ask for it. It doesn’t mean you’re weak or that you’re giving up.”

You blinked, stunned by his words. It was so different from the sharp, critical Tsukishima you were used to in the lab. “Why… why are you being so nice?” you asked, your voice barely audible.

He scoffed lightly, but there was no malice in it. “Don’t get the wrong idea. I just don’t want you to keep messing up the lab reports. It’s annoying,” he said, his usual gruffness returning, but there was a small, almost imperceptible smile on his lips.

Despite everything, you found yourself smiling back, a small, tentative curve of your lips. “Right. Of course,” you said, trying to sound nonchalant, though your heart felt lighter than it had in weeks.

The awkward silence returned, but this time it was different, less tense, more understanding. You nodded slightly, clutching your papers to your chest. “I should go,” you said, breaking the silence. “Thanks again for these.”

Tsukishima nodded, his eyes following you as you turned to leave. But before you could take more than a few steps, he called out, “Hey.”

You paused, looking back at him expectantly.

“Take care of yourself,” he said, his voice softer than before. “And don’t forget your vitamins.”

A laugh escaped you, surprising even yourself. “I won’t,” you promised, feeling a warmth in your chest that you hadn’t felt in a long time.

As you walked away, you couldn’t help but glance back at him one last time. Tsukishima was still standing there, watching you go, his expression thoughtful. You didn’t know what to make of it, but for the first time since starting university, you felt like maybe, just maybe, you weren’t completely alone.

Your mind racing with everything that had just happened. Tsukishima’s unexpected concern, his words of advice—it was all too much to process. But one thing was clear: he was more than just the grumpy, perfectionist senior you had thought he was. Beneath that hard exterior, there was something else—something that made your heart beat a little faster when you thought about him.

[ravencoloredroses]

First Time

Nyx x Reader

Summary: Nyx and Reader are together, but they’ve never been together……

Word Count: 3,787

Warnings: SMUT

A/N: Thank you for reading!! Please let me know what you think! <3

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Nyx’s POV

I have no idea how to tell her. The love of my life, my mate, my everything. I need to tell her why I haven’t tried to take the next step in our relationship. We’ve been together for around 6 months and they’ve been the best months of my life. When I was a little boy, I was infatuated with the concept of mates. The idea that there is someone out there perfectly made to be with you and you to them. I asked a lot of questions, but no one ever went into detail. No one ever mentioned that the bond must be accepted and they certainly didn’t mention how it was accepted. That’s the part that worries me.

Y/N and I have never talked about sex before so we don’t know each other's pasts. I have never done it before, but nobody knows that. Not even my family. When they sent me away to Windhaven I was given ‘the talk’. Really all we talked about was that it would be best to take a contraceptive tonic. My dad has been giving me bottles of this tonic because he thinks that I’m sexually active. Unbeknownst to him, I have a stockpile of the bottles under my bed because I’m too embarrassed to tell him the truth.

My first kiss was with Y/N, but nobody needs to know that either. I try not to think about the fact that I might not have been hers. And if I wasn’t her first kiss then I might not be the male to take her virginity. The thought of her being with another male upsets me, but if that’s the case then there’s nothing I could do to change that. I’m terrified of doing something wrong, of disappointing her. Sex is a very intimate experience that requires a lot of trust and if she gave me her trust just for me to fuck it up, I would never forgive myself.

That’s why anytime our kisses deepen or our touches get more sensual, I stop. I have to physically restrain myself before I do anything I’ll regret. I know that she notices, but she’s too kind to say anything, so we don’t. I need to grow up and ask for help.

“What are you thinking so hard about?” My uncle Cassian playfully whacks the back of my head to get my attention.

“Nothing.” I sigh.

“Uh-oh…. That doesn’t sound like nothing.” He plops down on the couch next to me.

“Is this about Y/N?” Uncle Az asks as he sits down on my other side. When I give him a shocked look he clarifies. “I know you guys haven’t accepted the bond yet. I just figured that’s what you were think about.”

Uncle Cass gasps. “You haven’t accepted it yet?” I shake my head.

“I want to. I really want to. But I’m scared.” I admit. I look up to see both of my uncles have confusion written all over their faces. “I’ve um- I’ve never..”

Uncle Az releases a knowing sigh. “You’re afraid that you’ll hurt her.” I nod aggressively, thankful that he didn’t make me finish my sentence. “Have you talked to her about any of this?” I look down at my hands to hide my embarrassment. “Then that’s step one. You need to talk with her. You need to talk about what you’re comfortable with. Set boundaries and limits for certain things.”

I nod in agreement. Of course I know that I need to talk to her, but then what? “What’s step two?” I ask.

“You decide what step two is after you talk to her. Step two could be to just go for it, or it could be to take it slow and have more conversations about it. It all depends.” Uncle Cassian answers. “You- You do know how it works, right?”

I glare at him. “Yes. I know how it works.”

He holds up his hands in defense. “Okay, okay. I just wanted to make sure. No one’s first time is good, so don’t worry about it too much.”

That is exactly what I’m worried about. “I want it to be, though. I want it to be special. She deserves it.”

Uncle Az gives me a small smile. “It will be special, Nyx. I promise.” He stands up from the couch and begins to walk towards the door, Uncle Cassian follows.

“W-Wait!” I run up to meet them. “Can we… keep this just between us?” I ask tentatively.

“You don’t want your dad to know you’re a virgin?” Uncle Cass asks with a raised eyebrow and I shake my head. He cracks a smile, “Okay then, your secret is safe with me….. and Nesta.” He spits out the last part and quickly runs away.

Uncle Az turns to place a hand on my shoulder. “I won’t tell anyone, Nyx.” I knew he wouldn’t, I was -and still am- worried that Uncle Cass would tell everyone. “Oh, and I would start taking those tonics under your bed by the way.” He says with a wink as he walks away.

“How did you-….. Nevermind. Thanks Uncle Az!” I yell out to him, but he’s already gone. Leaving me alone to plan out the conversation I’ve been putting off.

Reader’s POV

I’m laying down in bed thinking, like I have been for the past 3 hours. Nyx has been acting weird around me lately. Every time we start to get intimate, he pulls away. We’ve never talked about it and I’m starting to think that it’s because of me. I’ve never had sex before. I’ve never even had a boyfriend before. Nyx was my first kiss and he’s going to be my first in a lot of things, but I’m a little nervous. Actually, I’m terrified. They say your first time is painful, some people actually bleed! I know Nyx would never intentionally hurt me, but it sounds like it’s inevitable.

I haven’t told Nyx that I’m a virgin, so he probably doesn’t know that I’m nervous about it. He’s probably stopping us from doing anything intimate for a completely different reason. I just hope that him second guessing our relationship has nothing to do with it.

I’m pulled away from my thoughts when someone gently knocks on the door. “Come in.” I say, sitting up as Nyx slowly steps into our room. “This is your room too Nyx, you don’t have to knock.”

“I know, but I didn’t want to barge in on you.” He says, moving to sit down next to me. He grabs onto my hand and brings it up to his mouth for a kiss. “How was your day?” He brushes hair out of my face while he waits for my response. I don’t give one. Instead, I reach up to pull his lips down to mine. It starts out sweet and soft, like always. I feel him smile into the kiss as I wrap my arms around his neck and play with the back of his hair.

I lift my leg over him to staddle his lap and his hands find their way to my hips. I lightly bite down on his lip which causes him to moan into my mouth. Nyx stiffens below me as I move to start unbuttoning his shirt. He breaks the kiss and opens his mouth like he wants to say something, but nothing comes out. I feel absolutely mortified so I climb off of him and make a break for the bathroom when he grabs my hand to stop me. “Y/N, please don’t go.”

I turn around to look at him and wipe away my newly fallen tears. “It’s okay Nyx, I understand.”

He tightens his grip on my hand when I try to turn back around. “No, it’s not like that. I promise. I- I just want to talk before we…”

I nod and move to stand between his legs. “Do you not.. want to be with me in that way?” I ask, bracing myself for his answer.

“I do. I absolutely do, Y/N. I love you so much and I’ve never felt this way about anyone before. I’ve never…. been with anyone like that before.” He looks up at me from under his lashes to see my reaction. My mouth hangs open as I try to comprehend what he said.

“Yo-You’ve never….” He shakes his head and I released a breath I didn’t even know I was holding. Knowing that this will be both of our first time is so comforting to me I can’t even describe it. “Me neither.” I say with a smile.

Nyx blinks up at me, shocked. “You’ve never?” I repeat his head shake from earlier and then he repeats my breath release. “Oh, thank the Mother.” He laughs out and leans his head forward to rest on my chest. I cradle the back of his head while pressing a kiss into his hair. We stay like that for a while, just embracing each other, and then Nyx pulls back. “Do you still want to? I’m sorry I ruined the mood.”

I stare down at him, deciding to tell him the truth. “I’m scared.” He grabs both of my hands and runs his thumbs over my knuckles.

“We will go slow. I promise to be gentle, but the second something doesn’t feel right or you just want to stop, tell me. We will stop immediately, no questions asked.” He presses a kiss to both of my hands. “We’re in this together, my love.”

I lean down to press his lips to mine, then it’s my turn to moan into his mouth as he pulls me back down onto his lap. We’re back in the same position we were previously, but the feeling is different. This time Nyx isn’t stiff underneath me or restraining himself. This time his hands are roaming anywhere they can reach on my body as mine do the same.

I pull away for air, but my lips don’t want to stop. They move over to his jaw, down his neck and then over to the other side and back up. All while Nyx blesses my ears with his soft moans. I hadn’t noticed before, but his bulge beneath me has become very obvious. I begin to rock my hips back and forth, trying to create some type of friction. Nyx removes his hands from my body and I begin to panic until I realize what they are doing instead. Starting with the top, they begin to unbutton his shirt.

I place my hands over his and he looks up at me confused. “Let me.” I smirk at him as my hands fly to his hair and I kiss down his neck once again, but I keep going lower. I take my time around the base of his neck, making sure not to miss a spot. Nyx starts to lean backwards on the bed which grants me more access to his chest. My lips move down to his collarbone and I have to tear my hands away from his hair in order to undo the first button on his shirt. I slowly move down his body leaving a trail of kisses. When I get to the last button, I look up to find Nyx watching me intently. I smile at him as I make my way back up his chest and place my lips on his again.

He sits us up without breaking our kiss and removes his shirt. My hands run along his chest, over his shoulders, down his back, anywhere they can reach. Nyx tugs at the bottom my shirt and begins to pull it up over my head. Once it’s off, he gently flips us over so he’s laying on top of me. I try to pull him back down to kiss me, but he doesn’t budge. He stares down at me and moves a strand of hair behind my ear.

“You are so beautiful.” He whispers, continuing to brush my hair away. We stare at eachother for a moment, trying to catch our breaths, until his hand reaches around my back to unclasp my bra. He pauses to look at me for permission. I nod. He flings my bra onto the floor to join the growing pile of our clothes.

Nyx kisses behind my ear, my jaw, down my neck and then he closes his mouth around my breast. I press up into him when his tongue flicks my nipple. He uses one hand to stabilize himself and the other begins to move towards my pants. I feel my underwear becoming wet, which isn’t a new feeling, being with Nyx has left me wet plenty of times, but it’s never been this intense before. His mouth releases my breast and he leaves a trail of kisses down my stomach then stops right below my belly button.

Nyx positions himself between my legs and looks up at me as he begins to undo my pants. I lift my hips up so he can tug them off. Just as I suspected, my underwear are completely soaked. Nyx obviously sees my drenched panties, but he doesn’t say anything. Instead, he slowly -torturously- removes them too, leaving me completely bare before him. He’s eye level with my pussy now. I feel so exposed, almost embarrassed, until he places a kiss on the inside of my thigh. I meet his eyes as he kisses closer and closer to my pussy. When he finally presses his lips gently to my center, I squirm from the sensation.

I lay back down, but my eyes stay locked with his. Nyx reaches a hand up to lace his fingers with mine. This already intimate position immediately intensifies just by us holding hands. He squeezes my hand gently as he continues to press kisses into me.

His mouth covers my pussy completely, his tongue moving around as if he’s trying to memorize every inch of me. I try my best not to squirm, but the sensation is too fucking good. My unoccupied hand grabs onto his hair and I start to grind down on his mouth. My moans are escaping my mouth with no warning. No doubt everyone in this house can hear me, but I don’t fucking care. All I can think about is Nyx. How his tongue is pumping in and out of me, how his hand is still tightly interlocked with mine.

Without warning his other hand meets his mouth and he slides one finger into me. My back arches up at the sensation and I release my grip on his hair to grab the sheets next me. His tongue moves up to work on my clit and another finger joins the first. “Don’t stop! Oh my God, don’t stop!” I scream out and Nyx picks up his pace. His fingers find the magical spot that makes my body go numb.

I have no control over my body. My legs are violently shaking, my mouth is making noises I’ve never made before and my eyes are rolling back as Nyx pushes me over the edge. He draws out my orgasm, leading me through wave after wave of pleasure. After what feels like forever, but also nowhere near enough time, Nyx slides his fingers out of me and places a kiss on each of my thighs.

I finally open my eyes just in time to see Nyx place his fingers -drenched in me- into his mouth and moan at the taste. I watch him lick his fingers clean while his eyes never leave mine. Only when he sits back do I see that his bulge is practically begging me to help it, to set it free.

I try to sit up, but everything hurts in the best way so I stay where I am and watch Nyx. He’s looking at me with a look filled with love that I’m sure I match. He gives my hand a squeeze and then let’s go to unbuckle his belt. He stands up to shimmy off his pants and underwear, leaving him as bare as I am. His body is breathtaking. I want to memorize every inch of him. My eyes leave his to move down chest, over his torso and then his dick. I knew Nyx was gonna be big, his wings are fucking huge, but I’m actually concerned at his size. It might not fit.

Nyx pulls me out of my thoughts by rubbing his thumb along my cheek. My hand flies up to rest over his. “Y/N, look at me.” I do. “I’m gonna be here the whole time. It’s going to be okay. I promise.” He kisses me softly and I smile at the taste of myself on his lips. I nod at his words, but the thoughts don’t leave immediately.

“We‘ll go slow, okay?” I nod again and pull his hand off my cheek to lace our fingers together once more. Nyx climbs over me and lines himself up at my entrance. He drags himself through my folds, coating himself in my wetness. I take in a deep breath and prepare for him to push into me. We both moan at the feeling of finally connecting. My eyes never leave his as his tip slowly enters me. The pressure is almost too much to handle and the pain is noticeable, but bearable.

“Dear God, Y/N.” Nyx moans into my ear. “You feel so fucking good.” I kiss him as my response since I can’t really form words right now. He slowly sinks into me inch by glorious inch. When he finally bottoms out, I moan so loud I hear it echo off the walls. I lean my head up to see where we connect. We look fucking perfect. Like a painting that I’d want to look at for hours.

I rest my head back on the pillow and meet Nyx’s eyes again. “Can I move?” He asks, giving my hand a squeeze. I nod and he kisses me as he starts to slowly move. Agonizingly slow, he pulls back out of me almost all of the way and then pushes back in. The pain doesn’t necessarily go away, but the majority of it is replaced with pleasure. Nyx rests his forehead on mine as his pace quickens and our heavy breathing synchronizes.

Every time Nyx thrusts, I feel my muscles constricting which just makes everything feel so much better. “Fuck, Y/N. I’m close.” Nyx moans, giving my hand a squeeze.

“Me too.” I manage to whisper back.

“Together?” He presses a kiss to my forehead.

“Together.” I moan out as Nyx picks up his pace and his hand snakes down to rub my clit. That was what pushed me over the edge for a second time. I feel him follow immediately after me. Everything begins to blur but Nyx and I. All I can see is him. All I can feel is him. All I can hear is him. And I don’t want it to end. We ride our highs together, drawing this out as long as we can.

Nyx collapses down on top of me and I cradle the back of his head. I press kisses onto his shoulder as we try to catch our breaths.

After a moment, Nyx rises on his arms to look at me. “Is it okay if I pull out?” I wipe some of the sweat off of his forehead before I nod. We both look down to where we are connected and I hold my breath as he pulls out of me. It hurts a little when he does, but nothing I can’t handle. When he’s finally all the way out I release a sigh.

No blood.

Nyx sits up beside me and pulls me into his lap. He wraps his arms around me and lightly strokes up and down my back. “I love you so much, Nyx.” I say when I can actually speak. My legs are still shaking and my breathing hasn’t fully calmed down yet, but I feel amazing.

“I love you so fucking much, Y/N.” I look up to meet his gaze and he gently wipes away my stray tears. He lifts me up and carries me into the bathroom. “Wait here.” Nyx says as he sets me down on the counter. He goes to the linen closet, grabs a rag then heads over to the sink. “Do you have to pee?” He says while getting the rag wet.

I look over at him confused. “What?”

“I read that it’s not a bad idea to pee after sex. I guess it flushes out any bad bacteria in your system.” He scratches the back of his head nervously. I never thought about it before, but it makes total sense.

“I’ll try.” I say, preparing to stand up, but Nyx comes over and picks me up before I can. “I can walk, you know.” I laugh.

“I know, I just don’t want you to have to.” He kisses my forehead as he sets me down on the toilet and leaves to give me some privacy. I finish quickly and hobble over to the sink to wash my hands. When I turn the water off I see Nyx come up behind me in the mirror holding a fluffy robe. “Feeling okay?” I turn to face him while he helps me put the robe on.

“Yeah. Better than okay, actually.” I throw my arms around his neck to pull him down into a quick kiss. Nyx bends down to pick me up again and walks back to the bedroom.

When he sets me down on the bed, I crawl under the sheets and watch him walk over to the other side to join me. As soon as we are both under the covers, I snuggle into his side. “I can’t believe we waited 6 months for us to do that. Think of all the mind blowing sex we could have been having.” I joke after a moment of silence. Nyx laughs so hard that our bodies shake.

“Yeah, that’s true…” His tone becomes serious. “We will have lifetimes together, there is no race for us. I would have waited centuries for this moment.”

“Me too.” I have so many things I want to say to him, but he’s right, we will have lifetimes together. There will be other perfect moments like this one. So, I move closer to my mate's side as my eyes become droopy.

“Nyx…”

“Yes, my love?”

“I don’t think I can go to training tomorrow morning….”

He laughs quietly. “Then I guess we will just have to stay here.”

[undeadcourier]

This is the second in a series of posts meant to explore both real-life cases of radiation sickness and the sci-fi concept of ghoulification in some depth. Graphic descriptions of the physical deterioration of the body are included for informative purposes; reader discretion is advised.

For this second case study, I examine the effects on the human body of exposure to moderate levels of radiation over a long period of time, with a focus on the real case of the Radium Girls, in particular Mollie Maggia. 

Marie and Pierre Curie discovered radium in 1898, launching the Radium Craze. Radium was believed to have numerous health benefits and restorative properties and was used to treat arthritis, hypertension, schizophrenia, and even stomach cancer. It was also used in tonic water, toothpaste, and cosmetics, among many other products. 

After William J. Hammer created a glowing green paint made from radium and zinc sulfide, radioluminescent paint became popular in use on watches and clock dials. Three factories that used radioluminescent paint on watches and clock dials saw incidents of severe radium poisoning in workers, in Orange, New Jersey, Ottawa, Illinois, and Waterbury, Connecticut. 

Dial painters working for the U.S. Radium Corporation, most of whom were between ages 14 and 20, were assured they were safe and were not given appropriate personal protective equipment while exposed to the radium dust they used to mix the paint for the dials. Managers encouraged them to use their lips to create a fine point on their paintbrushes, necessary in the precision work they did, which caused them to ingest small amounts of radium during their shifts. In addition, the radium dust coated their hair and dresses, and some women, believing the radium to be harmless, even deliberately painted their teeth and nails to make them glow. Dial painters ingested about 76 microcuries of radium per year.

In addition to consuming radium in the paint, the dial painters were exposed to the radon gas that resulted from the decaying radium, increasing their exposure to around 13000% more than the maximum annual dose. For comparison, standing next to the Chernobyl meltdown would result in about 30 rem of radiation exposure. 10 rem is the lowest annual dose linked to an increased risk of developing cancer. 200 rem is enough to cause severe radiation sickness and death, and between 300-400 rem is regarded as a lethal dose.

When ingested along with food or water, roughly 80% of radium is excreted, but the remaining 20% travels throughout the body where it is deposited in the bones, emitting alpha particles as it decays and irradiating the cells on the surface of the bones. New bone growth results in radium being deposited deep into the bone where it remains.

The typical period of exposure among the dial painters was two years. Some developed mouth sores after only a month of working at the factories, but for others, symptoms took longer to appear.  First, the women would have felt fatigued and anemic as their damaged bones could no longer replace their red blood cells. 

Because they were primarily ingesting the radium, their mouths were often the most affected. By October of 1921, Mollie Maggia—who'd already had to have a tooth removed—returned to the dentist's chair to have even more of her teeth extracted. The radiation damage to her bones inhibited blood cell production, which in turn prevented the wounds from healing. The ulcers became necrotic and constantly oozed blood and pus. 

Throughout that November, Mollie's condition grew steadily worse, and in addition to the pain in her teeth and jaw, her hips and feet became sore.

As the painters' radiation sickness progressed, their joints would become stiff and severe pain in their limbs limited their mobility. The radium ate through their bones, leaving them perforated in a honeycomb pattern and prone to spontaneous fractures. The women's spines and long bones fractured and shortened.

Some of the women’s skin became so thin that even a fingernail scratch could cause it to split open.

Tumors the size of grapefruits or footballs developed on their bodies, and they suffered from blood disorders, menstruation issues, and sterility.

By January of 1922, Mollie was in constant, unbearable agony. Her teeth were rotting in her mouth and falling out before they could be extracted. In May, Mollie’s dentist was horrified when her jaw crumbled at a gentle touch. He proceeded to remove her jaw, not by an operation, but simply by pulling the disintegrating pieces out by hand. That summer, Mollie’s throat became painfully sore, and she experienced spontaneous bleeding from the jaw. By September, the radiation had eaten through the tissue of her jugular vein to the point of hemorrhage. Mollie's mouth and throat flooded with blood, and she died.

Mollie Maggia was the first from the U.S. Radium Corporation to die, just short of her 25th birthday, in 1922. 12 more women died the following year and another 50 fell severely ill.