#tom riddle x muggle!reader
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Sugar - (tom riddle x fem!muggle!reader)
Summary: Perhaps it was an accident. Or perhaps the fates were mocking him. He had not meant to venture into the little coffee shop and he had most definitely not meant to return. But he kept coming back and the waitress kept putting sugar packets near his coffee every damn time.
Warnings: Tom gets possessive halfway through so it's pretty tame for him. not proofread. oh also self-indulgent crime & punishment debate (got a lil carried away).
A/N: 5.5k words but it's kinda mehh. to the person who requested this, i hope you enjoy it at least a little <3
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Tom felt as if he was a solitary figure in a world hushed by the winter's harsh embrace. With each step he took away from the desolate building of grey against the pristine canvas of winter, he felt lighter. He did not cast a look back towards the orphanage looming behind him, instead focused on the sound of the snow crunching beneath his feet as they led him further into the dark street cloaked in a thick layer of snow.
The wizard knew if he spent another moment in that cursed place he would have lashed out and killed someone, so he had hastily thrown his coat and emerald scarf around himself before slamming the door shut behind him.Â
Two more years. He thought to himself. Then he would be out and would never be obligated to return again. Perhaps he would even burn the place to the ground if his plans worked out in his favour.Â
The air was crisp, and his breath materialized in front of him with each exhale. His eyes quickly scanned the narrow empty alley for a suitable quiet place where he could pass his time. There was nothing interesting, except for the tiny bookstore nestled in the corner of the street that emitted a warm, golden light through its window. Tom quickly decided it would do, and he strode towards the place with purpose. A small bell chimed as he entered the place, which he quickly realised was a bookstore with a cosy coffee shop tucked inside.Â
He inhaled the pleasant aroma of freshly brewed coffee mixed with the scent of weathered books. Before he could lose himself entirely in the intoxicating symphony of scents, a sudden, loud thud echoed from behind the counter, jolting him from his reverie.
"Blimey!" someone cursed, their voice slicing through the tranquillity. Tom found himself rooted to the spot, curiosity piqued, as a figure suddenly emerged from underneath the counter.
It was a girl. Unabashedly, his eyes traced the lines of her features, noting the delicate curve of her jaw and the cascade of hair that framed her face. He assumed she was around his age if not younger and he stared at the girl as she rubbed her head, wincing when she hit a particularly soft spot before she realised that she was not alone in the shop. She froze like a deer caught in the headlights and he watched as her cheeks flushed a deep shade of red.Â
Tom, still an observer, saw more than just the blush; he discerned the subtleties of her response, the way her eyes momentarily widened before seeking refuge elsewhere, fingers fidgeting with the edges of her knitted cardigan.
She attempted to compose herself and met his eyes. "Oh! Sorry, sir. How may I assist you?" She asked cheerfully, resisting the urge to duck her head down to avoid his intense stare.
He crossed the small distance to the counter. "I'd like a coffee. Black."
"No sugar?" she inquired, to which Tom raised a single brow. Her blush deepened as she quickly averted her eyes from his face.
"Right, of course. You may take a seat while I prepare this for you." With a nod, she hurried to fulfil his request, leaving Tom alone with the lingering scent of coffee and old books that were now intertwined with a pleasant smell of vanilla and sweetâÂ
It was her perfume, he realised with a start.
He hastily removed his coat and scarf before plopping down on the nearest armchair. His gaze remained fixed on the girl, absorbed in the rhythm of her practised motions as she prepared his drink, her movements seemingly both effortless and comforting. There was an almost lazy grace to her actions and he continued to watch as she sang under her breath so softly if he had not been staring so intensely, he would not have picked up on it.Â
He wondered how he had never noticed this place before. He had been passing through this little street for as long as he could remember but for some reason, he had only stumbled upon it today. His sharp eyes darted around, instinctively searching for traces of magic, half-expecting the discovery of a hidden passage to the wizarding world but he quickly realised the place was undeniably, disappointingly muggle.Â
Muggle.
He tore his gaze away from the girl at the mental reminder of what she was. He fished out a book from his bag and opened it to occupy his mind.Â
The subtle shuffle of her approaching steps drew his attention back to the present, and he met her gaze as she placed the steaming cup of coffee before him. A sugar packet sat innocently beside it. His eyes lingered on the packet for a moment before lifting coldly to meet hers.
She, however, was undeterred by the intensity of his glare. âIn case you change your mind.â She smiled at him softly before turning on her heel and walking back.
His gaze lingered on her retreating figure, and then, almost involuntarily, it dropped to the innocuous sugar packet.
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Tom did not know why he had returned. Truthfully, he had not even noticed his feet had led him here until he was in front of the familiar wooden door that led into the coffee shop. Perhaps he had thought more than he shouldâve about the disgustingly soft smile of that girl for the last five months. She was an insolent muggle, yet here he was, walking into the place as if he had never left.Â
The seasons had blurred since he had last been here. Winter had long surrendered to the warmth of summer. He had to spend at least a month in the orphanage, and he was hoping Malfoy would invite him over for the rest of the summer.Â
The place was just as he remembered it. The only difference was the lack of Christmas decorations. He faltered only slightly when he took notice of the girl behind the counter, already staring at him. She had not changed much. Her face was the same, less pale perhaps, but the same, nonetheless. The oversized knitted sweater that once enveloped her had been replaced by a little white sundress, and his gaze involuntarily lingered on the exposed smooth skin.
âWelcome back!â She greeted him cheerfully, and he was not surprised she remembered him. âWhat can I get you?â
âBlack coffee,â he replied curtly
She nodded as if she was expecting it. "Coming right up." Gently shutting her book, she gracefully moved towards the coffee machine. Tom's eyes couldn't help but trail to the volume she had been reading, and to his pleasant surprise, it was Dostoyevsky. He had not pegged her as someone who would enjoy Russian literature, with its weighty and morally morbid themes. In his mind, she seemed more likely to be a Jane Austen enthusiast, with her intricately written romances and flowery prose.
âItâs 'Crime and Punishment'." He suddenly heard her soft voice declare, and he looked away from the book to give his attention to the girl. Then feeling as if she had said something silly, she blushed and looked away quickly. "Though I'm sure you figured that. I just wondered why you look so surprised."Â
He replied before he could tell himself not to. "I did not imagine you as someone who would enjoy this."Â
Emboldened at his words, she turned to face him, a hand casually resting on her hip as she sported a cheeky smile. "Am I to presume you imagine me often?"
His sharp inhale was audible as he absorbed the unexpected shift in her demeanour. He had not expected this shy, timid girl to tease him so boldly. She was a little vixen.
But he did not give her the satisfaction of getting a reaction out of him. A lazy raise of his brow was the extent of his acknowledgement before his gaze wandered towards the rows of bookshelves, feigning indifference. "Do you have another copy? Perhaps I shall like to reread this evening."
She frowned, walking over towards the table he had occupied last time to set his coffee down. He grimly took notice of the sugar packet placed near it. "I'm afraid not. But you can have mine."Â
"No, that is quite alriâ" He began to decline but she had already crossed the small distance between them and was holding out the thick book. He hesitated for a moment before his fingers closed around the object, careful to avoid touching hers.Â
The girl smiled and walked away before he could even say thanks. Not like he was going to.Â
Settling back into the soft armchair, he opened the book only to freeze at the sight of a name scribbled on the front page and he knew it belonged to her. The wizard rolled the name around in his mind and determined that it suited her. He stared at her name for a minute longer before turning the page and delving into the content of the book.Â
He had been so immersed in the story that he had not noticed how the time had passed. The gradual hush of the coffee shop's ambient sounds finally penetrated his concentration, and he distinctly heard the girl approaching him.Â
"I'm sorry to disturb you but we're closing in five minutes." She looked at the book in his hands. "You may return it once you're done."Â
He hummed and looked down at where he had stopped.Â
"We sometimes encounter people, even perfect strangers, who begin to interest us at first sight, somehow suddenly, all at once, before a word has been spoken."
He wondered if the universe was trying to tell him something.Â
Tom found himself caught in the silent narrative of this stranger's presence.
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He returned the next day.
She looked up to see him enter, the sleeves of his button-up shirt rolled up.Â
Tom placed the book on the counter.Â
"You finished it in one day?"
He shrugged. "I'm a fast reader."Â
She gave him a small smile, turning to make his black coffee before he could ask for it. "Every time I reread it it takes me a few days." She paused for a moment, turning to look at him over her shoulder. "The usual?"
He nodded. "The usual." He debated whether or not to voice his next question, and decided one conversation with the girl would not hurt.
"Why do you read it so often?"
"Each time I find new details that make Raskolnikov's character more complex. Each time I discover these small little things I missed the last time I read it becomes so much better. Plus I enjoy his moral dilemma."
He hummed, his curiosity piqued. He took his usual seat and watched as she brought his coffee and set it down in front of him. "Enlighten me." He gestured towards the seat in front of him. She hesitated only for a second before taking a seat.Â
"Raskolnikov is obviously a complex character. His actions are driven by a desire for power and superiority, a belief that he is exempt from conventional morality. However, one could argue that his internal struggles and eventual remorse suggest a more nuanced exploration of morality."Â
Tom furrowed his brows. "I see him as a product of his environment, a desperate man driven to extremes by the harsh circumstances he faced. His morality shifts to the other side of the spectrum."Â
She cocked her head to the side, and he could see her getting slightly frustrated. "But morality is not just a spectrum; it's a complex interplay of values, societal norms, and personal convictions. Raskolnikov's guilt stems from the clash between his actions and the intrinsic moral compass within him. It's the consequence of recognizing the weight of one's choices."
He scoffed before he could stop himself. "Morality is subjective. What is right for one may not be right for another. Raskolnikov was weak and he was an idiot. Guilt is a useless emotion and it is for the weak."
Her expression remained unwavering. "But perhaps it's that recognition of guilt that separates the morally discerning from those who lack empathy. The fact that you can't comprehend his guilt doesn't make it foolish. It makes it human."
Tom's eyes narrowed a glint of impatience in his gaze. "Human or not, guilt is a hindrance. It's a sentiment for those too feeble to rise above their actions. If I were to make a difficult choice, I would do it without hesitation, without remorse."Â
He only realised the slip of his tongue after the words left his mouth. He stilled, gauging her reaction yet her response was measured but firm. "Raskolnikov's guilt is a testament to his humanity, his ability to grapple with the consequences of his choices. It's what sets him apart from those who operate without remorse."Â
"Butâ"
"So what you're saying is you would kill and feel no remorse?" She cut him off.
Yes.
"You do not understand." He did not intend his tone to be so harsh, yet the words left his mouth coldly. She visibly withdrew and nodded stiffly. "Right. Enjoy your coffee."
He opened his mouth to say something but realised for the first time in his life he did not know what to say.Â
He was left staring at the cursed sugar packet she had left near his coffee again.
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He did not return the next day. Nor the day after. Or after.
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Two weeks passed with no sign of him.
And then she saw him step into the coffee shop. He walked in with determination. He walked up to the counter, meeting her gaze with an intensity that mirrored the unspoken tension between them. "I'd like a black coffee," he said, his tone even, though a hint of something lingered beneath the surface.Â
She nodded, her expression composed but guarded. As she prepared the coffee, the air seemed charged with unspoken words. Her usual cheerful smile was notably absent. The absence struck him, and he realised he had enjoyed her smiles.
When she placed the coffee in front of him, there was a palpable pause. He glanced at the sugar packet, a subtle acknowledgement of the lingering disagreement. Without a word, he took it, his eyes meeting hers briefly before he poured the sugar into his coffee.Â
She looked at him, her gaze unwavering, before a small, almost imperceptible smile tugged at the corner of her lips.Â
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He returned the next day. And the day after that. And for the rest of summer.
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The next time he stepped into the familiar place, winter had covered the city with a snowy blanket once again. It had been a year since he first discovered this little place. And he had not seen his little waiter since he left for Hogwarts in September.Â
When he walked in, her eyes lit up visibly. "Hi!" She waved at him with a bright grin.Â
"Hello." He greeted as he unwrapped his scarf and settled in his usual seat. In a matter of minutes, she was bringing him his usual order. She was back to wearing her warm knitted sweaters. "How did you enjoy the book?"
"Oscar Wilde never disappoints," he said. She hummed in agreement, pleased at his words. He watched as her hands dropped to fidget with the bottom of her sweater. "You wish to ask me something." He stated. "Ask."
"Do you study in a boarding school?"
Tom hesitated only for a moment before replying. "Yes."
"Oh. Well, that explains the months of not showing up."
"Were you expecting me?" He teased her with an amused smirk, taking delight in the way her cheeks reddened.Â
"I was just wondering that is all," she admitted, a hint of curiosity peeking through. Tom observed her, noting the return of the timid, shy girl from their first encounter. It amused him how a few teasing remarks could momentarily whisk away her fiery boldness. He couldn't help but wonder what it would take to awaken it once again.
"And do you wonder about me often, little vixen?" he added, a playful glint in his eyes.
She blushed harder at the nickname but then as if a thought had struck her, she straightened and Tom watched as she visibly mustered up her courage. "I actually was wondering your name."
He bristled, but she must have not noticed because she continued. "I suppose I have not given you mine either." She mused out loud and announced her name to him. "But I thought it bizarre that considering all the time we've talked we never got around to that. Friends who do not each other's names." The girl laughed at the last notion and only then she realised that Tom had remained unnervingly quiet throughout the exchange. She raised her eyes from the frayed edges of her sweater, and the sight almost made her take a step back. His eyes had darkened, and she could have sworn she saw them flash red. There was no warmth, no familiarity in his gaze.Â
"Are you alright?"
Suddenly, he rose from his seat, an ominous tension permeating the air as he advanced towards her with every word. "We are not friends. You dare to think I would be friends with the likes of you?" His words were sharper than the keenest of blades, cutting into her with merciless precision. "Foolish, little girl," He spat out before grabbing his things and storming out of the place. As the door closed behind him, the little coffee shop seemed to exhale, the echoes of his harsh words lingering in the hushed aftermath.
She stood frozen in her place, helpless against the storm of emotions and the tears that began to veil her vision.Â
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Tom fumed for months after their last encounter. How dare the ignorant muggle insinuate that they were friends? He scarcely considered his Knights of Walpurgis as his friends, and she thought she would just appoint herself the title? Who did she think she was?
"Mate, you alright? You've been unresponsive for a while." Malfoy nudged him slightly, attempting to draw his attention back to the present.
Tom made a noise of acknowledgement before mentally shaking the image of his little waiterâ no, not his, he berated himselfâ from his mind.Â
But no matter how he tried, he could not. He could not just banish her from his thoughts. He knew a part of him, a rather embarrassingly large part of him enjoyed her company, her passion, her conversationsâ just her.Â
And there, tucked away in the recesses of his trunk, lay her damned bookâ a taunting reminder of her. The temptation to burn it, to obliterate any remnants of her from his life, danced on the edge of his thoughts. He had shoved away, out of sight if only just to save himself the fury, the anger, (the longing).
He wondered if she was going through the same turmoil as him. He hoped she was. She had no right to make him feel this way and get away with it unscathed.Â
But she was too enticing to give up. He did not know what it was about her. She was a muggle, an ordinary, plain girl working at a forgotten little cafe. Sure, she liked books, but so did a lot of other people. Yes, she was pretty, but so were a lot of other girls. But none could even come close to stirring his emotions as she did.
Perhaps it was the ease with which she conversed with him. Or the entirely too cheery smiles. Or her endearing knitted sweatersâ though he secretly favoured the sundresses.
He, of course, knew what it was. He had tried to deny the idea to himself, but there was no escaping it. Tom had never been able to be unequivocally authentic with another individual before. From his early childhood, he refused to allow anyone close to him. He never lowered his walls and rejected anything that would yield a genuine connection. It was refreshing with her. He had no cause to uphold a curated facade.
Had she not been a muggle, he would entertain the thought of her bewitching him. He would have been convinced the girl put some spell on him or slipped a potion into his drink.Â
It was maddening.Â
She was maddening.
He sighed upon realising that he had spiralled again thinking of her. He needed to return the book, and maybe that would ease his mind. Perhaps once he was rid of her possession, she would not haunt him anymore. (Though he knew he was only trying to reassure himself with the last thought.)
As summer loomed around the corner, it felt both too distant and too imminent, mirroring the paradox of his tangled emotions.
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The sound of her laugh rang out before he could even close the door behind him. His head snapped up so fast it was a wonder he did not get whiplash. But there she was, his little waiter, chuckling delightfully as some boy spoke lowly from behind the counter. Chuckles escaped her lips, and she bit down on her lip in a futile attempt to stifle the laughter, her hands deftly at work preparing a drink. Despite her efforts, laughter bubbled forth once more, forcing her to set the cup down to avoid any potential spills.
An immediate surge of anger coursed through him. Who was this boy? What business did have with her? What right did he have to elicit such genuine laughter from her? (Most importantly, how dare she replace him?)
Tom swallowed the lump in his throat, attempting to gather himself into some semblance of a composed, unaffected man that he most definitely was not at that moment. With a loud, purposeful cough, he sought to catch her attention.
She spun around, the practised smile reserved for customers settling onto her face as she readied herself to serve him. However, the smile swiftly vanished the moment her doe-like eyes locked onto him. She looked like a deer caught in headlights as she stared at him, wide eyes roving over his face as if to confirm that he was really standing there, in front of her, and was not a figment of her imagination.Â
Because despite their last encounter, despite the anger, and the hurt she had felt, she kept hoping he would return. She kept imagining him standing there, with his ridiculously fancy scarf as he spewed out an apology. She had delved so deep into her fantasies involving him that now that he was actually there, she did not what to do or to say. Her tongue was tied, and her brain was fogged. What was she supposed to say?
It seemed he decided to grant her mercy and be the first to break the tense silence.
âHello.âÂ
âHi.â
He shuffled closer, though his steps were unsure, unlike his usual confident strides that she was used to seeing. âI wished to return your book.â He declared yet made no move to reach into his bag for the said book. He allowed his eyes to drink in the sight of her, her eyes that always seemed to glisten, her hands that were always fidgeting, her little sundress that he was afraid would drive him to insanity, (and her lips that he wished he could press against his own just so he could find out what they felt like, tasted like.) He shoved the last one into a drawer in his mind and locked it away. He could not fantasise about her. She was a muggle. He could not stoop so low as to hold affections for a muggle girl.
âDid you enjoy it?â The girl asked tentatively as if afraid one wrong word would set him off, have him spitting more harsh words that would dig deep into her skin and remain there.Â
âAs always.â He replied. Because every book she gave him held another meaning. She was a clever girl, choosing the ones that she knew would have him coming back with a strong debate prepared in his mind. They always seemed to stand on opposite sides of every argument that the books posed, ensuring that their discussion would get heated, exciting, and thrilling.Â
While Tom vehemently disagreed with her views, he found pleasure in the way her mind worked. He admired her quick-wittedness, her ability to counter every argument he posed. No one else had engaged him in such stimulating conversations. She was a breath of fresh air, a captivating force he wanted to inhale and never release. He yearned to suffocate in the essence of her being, to be consumed and to consume in return. He wanted to own herâ that irrational desire to keep her for himself was always there in the deeper parts of his mind that he was scared to venture into.
âIâm glad you enjoyed it.â She responded but he could detect the subtle undercurrent of uncertainty in her voice.
He hesitated. âMay I have one black coffee?â He was extending an olive branch, and while it was not an outright apology, coming from Tom, it was a whole declaration.Â
âItâs five minutes until closing time.âÂ
She would not be swayed so easily then.Â
Fine. Tom thought. He would make her come to her senses.Â
The boy who he had forgotten was still there suddenly came to stand next to him. Tom eyed him with disdain, his features curling into an unimpressed sneer, raising a lazy brow.
âIâll help her close up, mate. You can leave now.âÂ
âDaniel, that is not necessary.â She muttered, glancing between the two men nervously. Daniel? Tom clenched his jaw, enraged. In his absence, it seemed she had gotten on first-name basis with a boy. His mouth soured with the taste of betrayal at her blatant ignorance. How could she discard him so easily? Had she not suffered all these months at the mere thought of him? Had he been alone in his suffering?
âNo,â Tom stated flatly. âYou will leave.â He told the boy then turned to face his waiter. âWe will talk.âÂ
âTom, I do not thinkââ
He cut her off with a hiss. âIt was not a request.â
Daniel seemed wholly displeased. He opened his mouth to argue, but his girl beat him to it. âItâs okay, Daniel. I will see you some other time.â
âWhatever he has to tell you, surely he can say in front of me.â
She shook her head gently, trying to dissuade him. âItâs a matter between him and I. I would rather talk privately.âÂ
Tom looked smug as he faced Daniel again, struggling to contain his smirk. He could see the indignation clear on the boyâs face as his eyes flickered dubiously between her and Tom. He knew the wizard was no ordinary acquaintance of her, he could feel the palpable tension in the air like a wolf.Â
Tom, of course, wished to push his buttons further, just to have the last word. âYou heard her. Leave.âÂ
Daniel scoffed. âI will see you tomorrow then.â He muttered and with one last long look, he squared his shoulders and left the cafĂŠ with as much dignity as his wounded pride could muster.Â
As the door shut with a final thud, they were left in pregnant silence, both unsure of the dynamics at play between them. The air in the cafĂŠ hung heavy with unspoken tension as if the silence itself had taken on a weight, pressing down on them both. The ticking of the clock on the wall seemed louder than usual, each second echoing in the quiet space.
She was the first to cave. "Well? You wished to talk." Gesturing towards him with a hand expectantly. "Talk."Â
Tom inhaled sharply, and for the first time in his life, he did not quite know what to say. How to proceed.Â
"Who is he?" The question tumbled from his lips before he could stop it.Â
She raised a brow. "Seriously? After how you walked out of here last time I would think your choice of words would be different."
"Different? I hardly think the question was unfair."
She huffed impatiently, discarding her apron as she turned from him to put everything away for the night. "Of course. How foolish of me to assume that you have no business inquiring about my life when we are not even friends." She chuckled bitterly. "You made the notion quite appalling if memory serves me right. You wish to know who is Daniel? For all you know, he could be my fiancee. Would it matter? No. Because you and I are hardly acquaintances."Â
An unfamiliar feeling began coiling in the pit of his stomach, and he suddenly felt sick. She briefly turned to fix him with a pointed glare and froze at the look on his face. The dancing flames of the candles seemed to mirror the flickering emotions in Tom's eyesâflames of irritation, discontent, and an unexpected pang of jealousy.
Tom could scarcely believe his fate. How was it that heâ the most powerful wizard of his generationâ had succumbed to the pathetic disease ofâ what was it? Desire? Lust? Infatuation? Such mundane urges were beneath him, he had no wish to pursue anyone or anything that was not remotely related to his quest for power. Yet there she was. In her infuriating fucking dress and those innocent eyes. Did she even know what sort of turmoil she had caused him?
All of a sudden he felt exhausted, defeated. His shoulders sunk visibly as he ran a hand through his hair. He would use a hundred of her sugar packets in his coffee if it meant she would just grace him with her bubbly smile again and justâ just what? Leave him be? He did not want that. Treat him as if nothing had happened? Maybe. Release him from whatever enchantment she put him under? Yes.
"What do you want from me?" He asked at last, frustration clear in his voice.
She regarded him with disbelief as she rounded the counter to stand directly in front of him. "What do I want from you?" She repeated incredulously. "I want an apology! I want an explanation! I wantâ" she sighed, cutting herself off before she could finish the thought. "You cannot just show up here demanding things and ordering people around after how you treated me last time. If you wish to continue this conversation, you will apologise to me."
"You want me to say sorry?" He took a step towards her.
"Yes!"
"Fuck your apology."Â
Before she could register what was happening, Tom closed the minute distance between them and caved into his desire. He grabbed her face, fingers threading through her hair, and pressed his lips against hers. The kiss was not gentle; it was a collision of pent-up tension and bottled-up desires.
Tom's lips moved fervently against hers, pouring his frustration into the act. It was a silent declaration that transcended the boundaries of his complicated inner turmoil. Tom knew that. But he could not pull away from herâ not after having tasted how her lips feel like.Â
Her hands, which had hovered hesitantly in the space between them, found their way to his shoulders, fingers gripping the fabric of his coat, pulling him closer.Â
She feltâtasted like God's favourite nectar, sweet and addictive and he knew he would never get enough of it. She might not have been a witch, but he was bewitched by her.Â
As they broke apart, breathless, the air between them hung heavy with the residue of their shared kiss. He dared not to ease his hold on her, only stared at her with darkened eyes, taking delight in the way her lips were bruised, and puffy, all because of him. But it was not enough. He needed to mark her for all to see.Â
He dove into the tender skin of her throat like a man starved, teeth sinking into her flesh with no warning, and a sick sort of satisfaction washed over him at the muffled moan that escaped her mouth. He sucked on the skin until he was sure there would be a purple mark blooming on the spot before running his tongue over the flesh to soothe the sting. He did not waste any second before moving to mark another spot.
"I do not even know your name." She managed to choke out in between her whimpers, hands moving of their own accord to tangle in his hair, and a particular tug had him growling deep in his throat.Â
"Tom." He whispered, pulling away from her neck only to return his lips to hers. "Say it. Say my name." He murmured in between the kisses, pushing her back until her back was pressed against the counter. He easily picked her up to place her on the surface, his fingers trailing along her thighs to her knees to nudge them apart so he could stand in between them.Â
"Tom." She breathed out in a daze, and he smirked in delight.Â
She was his. He had already branded her, and he would do much more to ensure she knew it was him she belonged to.Â
He leaned to brush his lips against the shell of her ear. "I hope you know there is no going back from this. From me." He whispered, fingers slipping under the strap of her dress and dragging it down her shoulder slowly. "You are my dirty little secret now. Mine."
She shuddered under the weight of his words but he was already snaking his hand around her throat as his lips found home on her own once again.
No going back.
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#tom riddle#tom riddle fanfiction#tom riddle one shot#tom riddle x reader#tom riddle imagine#tom riddle x y/n#tom marvolo riddle#tom riddle fanfic#tom riddle fic#tom riddle x muggle!reader#tom riddle x fem!reader#tom riddle x you
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(Fine, Iâll do it my damn self: part 5 of my silly lil mlm stories <3)
tmr is just babygirl i donât make the rules
Watercolors (Chapter One) â tom riddle x male! artistic! hufflepuff! reader
he could manipulate and possess me thus irreversibly changing my trust in people despite it never being mentioned again and i would thank him
yk, i absolutely love chamber of secrets, but who starts a new diary (obtained under questionable circumstances) with âmy name isâ?
â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘
Tom Marvolo Riddle had been stuck inside of his diary since he was sixteen years old.
The diary itself, inside, was a perfect replica of Hogwarts, the boundaries stretching out well into the Forbidden Forest. Perfect, except for the fact that it was made solely of parchment and ink, and was completely devoid of color or life.
Tom hated the color of parchment.
The diary passed hands many times over the five subsequent decades. First there was the pathetic, sniveling manâthe Malfoy sycophantâwho all but groveled at Tomâs feet (metaphorically, of course).
Next was the littlest Weasley, the redheaded girl who bored Tom to (again, metaphorical) death. He could only pretend to be interested in how Dean Thomas held the door open for her so many times before he wanted to bash his head into one of the walls.
(He tried, once. The parchment just ripped and left him with a nasty paper-cut on his forehead. Tom missed the red of blood. Now, he bled only black, dripping ink.)
Then, Harry Potter, the boy fated to defeat him, (or whatever) who turned out to be really quite sweet. As a last fuck you to whom he became in the future, Tom aided Harry in coming out to the littlest Weasleyâs mother.
Thatâll show Lord Voldemort, the dipshit, Tom thought gleefully.
Eventually though, even lovely Harry became more distant, his newly rediscovered godfather being the rightful center of his attention. Tom supposed he might have been jealous of the acquitted Black in another life, but after fifty years of loneliness he understood the yearning for living, breathing friends rather than just paper that writes back, as Little Weasley once called him.
Then, out of nowhere, came the Hufflepuff boy with a tin of watercolors and an eye for the overlooked.
The first thing this wondrous creature made for Tom was a little stone cottage, complete with a warm hearth, a garden of pumpkins and berries, and an idyllic curl of smoke from the chimney. The cottage sat near the edge of the forest, wonderfully secluded and alive.
Tom had watched as gentle sweeps of a brush, suspended in midair, created a home. One that existed in both the physical diary and the hellish paper prison Tom resided in.
Everything existed.
The warm, brown thatched roof, the colorfully patterned bedspread, and even a fireplace.
When the masterpiece was complete, Tom, although he would never admit it, gorged himself on the gardenâs sweet huckleberries and sour raspberries. Afterward, he explored his new house, even going so far as to stick his hand into the flames of the fire.
(They werenât real. They felt like nothing more than a faint warmth against his skin. Disappointing, Tom supposed. But probably a safety hazard.)
Then he curled up in the big bed, under the vibrant bedspread, and closed his eyes.
For the first time in fifty years, Tom slept.
â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘â˘
Chapter Two
i need you all to know that the original title for this was âTom Riddle is a man-whore(crux)??? (NOT CLICKBAIT)â so-
#harry potter#fuck jkr#hp#hp x male reader#x male reader#tom riddle#tmrhp#tom riddle x male reader#horcrux#no but seriously if tom didnât hate muggle stuff so much iâd say that he could hit me with his car but yk he DOESNT OWN ONE#x reader#tom riddle x reader
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Wicked Game - Chapter One
Pairing: Mattheo Riddle x Weasley!Reader
Summary: When you realise just how bad your parents financial situation is you make a deal with your fathers boss.
Warnings: muggle au, fluff, angst, swearing
A/N: Hope you guys enjoy this! The other chapters are going to be longer and this is going to be a relatively slow burn. Please let me know what you think and let me know if you would like to be tagged! I love you all! xxx
masterlist
Chapter One
You knew that your parents were struggling financially, you had always known, especially when you were at school. They had managed to send all eight of you to an exclusive boarding school so you never minded that your things were second-hand, you thought they added more charm. Now, that you were out of school, it seemed as though your parents were struggling even more, your dadâs boss, Mr Riddle had cut his hours right down.
Arthur and Molly were too proud to ask for help â despite having an array of friends who would drop everything to help â and they had denied your help more than once. You really didnât want to see your family out on the street so you decided to take drastic measures.
âIâm heading to London today,â you told your mum as you sat down for breakfast on a warm summerâs morning.
Before she could reply, your twin brother spoke up, âWhy, whatâs in London? I thought you werenât at the shop today.â
You rolled your eyes, âRon, just because your nose is enormous doesnât mean you should be poking it in other peopleâs business,â you flicked his nose causing him to bat your hand away and he scowled at you, the tips of his ears turning red.
After a quick breakfast, you were out the door and on the way to London, despite being pretty far out in the countryside you only needed one train to get there. The journey seemed to go by so quickly and soon enough you were walking into the lobby of the high rise building. It was so quiet and clean that it seemed clinical. The receptionist looked at you with wide eyes when you told her who you were there to see but you werenât waiting long until she led you into Mr Riddleâs office.
As you walked in, trying to stop your hands from shaking, the older man looked up at you and took in your appearance, âyouâre Arthur Weasleyâs daughter,â it wasnât a question as he gestured for you to sit down.
You nodded as you cleared your throat and sat down, ây-yes, Sir.â
âAnd what does Arthur Weasleyâs daughter want with me?â he asked as he went back to signing the papers on his desk.
âMy parents need help,â Mr Riddle glanced up at you with a raised eyebrow and you elaborated, âfinancial help.â
âAh,â he had a ghost of a smirk on his face as he dropped his pen on top of his papers and leaned back in his leather wing backed chair, âif your parents hadnât of had an army of children maybe theyâd be in a much more comfortable position.â
It was amazing how quickly your fear turned to anger and you couldnât stop the next words that fell from your lips, âwell maybe if you gave my dad reasonable hours then I wouldnât be here,â you folded your arms and narrowed your eyes.
Riddle blinked at you before letting out a harsh laugh that made the hairs on the back of your neck stand up, âmy dear, all working hours have been cut since the war ended.â
âStill, there must be something I can do, please Iâll do anything,â you didnât mean to beg but you were getting desperate now. Why wouldnât he help you? A man in his position of power was exactly the sort of man who would help you, but he wouldnât, not for nothing in return.
âYou would do anything to save your family from ruin?â when you nodded he smirked and buzzed for the receptionist, âBella find my son and send him in.â
Moments later, Mattheo Riddle came striding into the room like he owned it, he was even more handsome than he had been in school with the same sullen look on his face. His eyebrows shot up in surprise when he saw you standing in his fatherâs office but he nodded at you all the same.
âY/N.â
âHi, Mattheo.â
âYou see, Y/N,â Riddle started âI have been trying to make a marriage for my son and at every turn he has rejected several extraordinary women,â Mattheo flushed and his eyes dropped to the floor at his fatherâs words, âyou see, itâs very difficult for those fools to take me seriously at the Ministry without a marriage. You say you would do anything to save your family? Marry my son.â
Matteoâs eyes widened, âfather,â he started but fell silent as Riddle gave him a hard look.
Riddle looked back at you, âaccept and your family will want for nothing. Refuse, and I will make their life a living hell.â
This was the last thing you expected â or wanted â your heart was in your throat but you had started all of this and now you had to see it through. Briefly, you wondered why he would ask you, given Riddleâs opinion of your family. But you realised it was to keep you in line, you werenât an idiot. You glanced at Mattheo who refused to look at you and you turned back to Riddle.
âWhen you put it that way, how can I refuse? Of course, you leave me no choice but to accept.â
Riddle smirked, âexcellent, Iâll make the necessary arrangements. Mattheo, please show our guest out.
The younger Riddle glared at you as he gripped your elbow and steered you out of the room, âwhat the fuck, Y/N? Why would you do that?!â he hissed.
You managed to shake him off by the time you got to reception, âyou heard your dad, I didnât have a choice!â you conveniently âforgotâ to tell him that it was you who had sought Riddle out.
âYouâre going to regret this,â there was a fire blazing in his usually cold brown eyes.
âTrust me, I already do,â you scowled.
As you got home, you had a guilty feeling in the pit of your stomach so you decided to shut yourself in your room. Your parents were going to be so disappointed. You were shut in your room all day, even when Hermione came to visit. You didnât see anyone till later that evening when your dad barged in.
âWe need to talk.â
âAbout?â
âMattheo Riddle.â
Your heart sank like a rock as you looked at your dadâs disappointed face, âwhat do you want to know?â
âYouâre not marrying him, Y/N.â
âI already accepted.â
âWell unaccept!â
âI canât!â you sighed, âyou guys needed help, I never meant for it to get this far but itâs done. If I refuse he will make our lives hell, you know he will. All I wanted was to help,â but you feared you had made things worse.
âWe never wanted this for you, Y/N,â Arthur sighed as he awkwardly lingered in the doorway.
âLook dad, I know and Iâm sorry. Iâll try and get out of it somehow.â
Arthur nodded with a sigh as he left the room, knowing the conversation was over and knowing that he wasnât going to be able to change your mind.
A couple of minutes later, you decided that you needed some air, you all but crept by the living room where Riddle was having a hushed conversation with your parents. As you headed towards the back door, Harry called after you.
âHey, Y/N.â
You groaned and turned to face him, knowing that heâd have something to say, he always did, âHarry, please. I really donât need a lecture off you, of all people.â
âWhoa, whoa,â Harry laughed, throwing up his hands in mock defence, âIâm not going to lecture you. It was brave what you did, stupid,â he added âbut brave.â
You laughed, âI agree with the stupid part, but thanks Harry,â you grinned.
âI canât believe youâre gonna be a Riddle though,â he said with a look of distaste on his face.
âYeah, yeah. Itâs a real tragedy,â you laughed, âsee you, Harry,â you shot him a wave as you headed outside into the warm summer air.
The air smelled sweet, like honeysuckle and lemon and you gazed around the wild garden, feeling sadness linger in the pit of your stomach. You spotted Mattheo sitting on the garden wall, smoking a cigarette. With a sigh, you walked over to him and sat next to him as he nodded at you.
âItâs nice out here,â he nodded at the strings of fairy lights that had been weaved through the flowering bushes, âyou caused quite a stir it seems,â he mumbled as he blew out a plume of smoke, being careful to not let it get in your face.
âWell, it was getting boring around here, so I thought Iâd spice it up,â you laugh as Mattheoâs lips almost quirked up into a smirk, âso,â you started, âwhatâs your reason for agreeing to marry me? Whatâs in it for you?â
He scoffed as he looked at you with brown eyes so unlike his dadâs cold blue ones, âmy father says jump, I ask how high.â
âOh,â you bit your lip, you couldnât imagine having that sort of relationship with your family, âIâm sorry,â you hadnât just ruined your life, youâd ruined his too.
Mattheo pulled a face, âdonât be silly, you donât have to apologise for anything. Look, Y/N, despite what the papers say about me, Iâm not a monster. Iâll treat you how you deserve to be treated but, Y/N, Iâm never going to love you. If thatâs what youâre looking for, youâre going to be disappointed.â
Personally, you thought love was overrated, people did stupid things when they were in love, âwell, Iâm never going to love you either.â
âPerfect,â he nodded, flicking the stub of his cigarette away.
âSo, when do you take me away from my family?â you joke.
âNot until the wedding, my dad wanted you to move in straight away but I convinced him there was no need.â
âThank you.â
The handsome boy looked at you in bewilderment, like he didnât know why you would thank him, âdonât look for any redeeming qualities in me, Y/N. I have none.â
Before you could reply, Riddle was striding across the garden, âweâre leaving, Mattheo.â
âI guess Iâll see you soon,â the boy nodded at you before disappearing up the country lane.
With a sigh, you headed back inside the house to find everyone sitting around the table. As you walked in they all stared at you as you sat down. Sirius looked impressed while Lily looked like she felt sorry for you. You knew that someone was dying to say something.
âJust donât,â you said, shaking your head as you reached for your glass of juice.
It was silent for a couple of moments before Ginny spoke up, âhey, at least heâs hot,â everyone let out a nervous laugh and fell into an uneasy conversation as they waited for dinner.
#fluff#au#mattheo x weasley!reader#mattheo x reader#mattheo x you#mattheo x y/n#mattheo riddle#reader insert#weasley!reader#tom riddle#arthur weasley#molly weasley#ron weasley#hermione granger#harry potter#ginny weasley#muggle au#everyone lives au
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What's your opinion on his Pureblood views / views on muggles?
Oh boy, here we go. This is what I would like to think as a controversial thing, especially considering Riddle as many have different opinions about his views on pure-blood supremacy. However, the way I am analysing Riddle is more looking at his psychological background and so that's how I'll answer this. ( I was quite literally clawing at the bars of my enclosure to not go into a spiel about the politics of it and stay purely psychological.)
Tom Riddle, as a student at Hogwarts, exhibited an attractive personaâtalented, polite, charming, and intellectual. Despite his outward charisma and the group of 'friends' he had gathered, it is clear that Riddle harboured no genuine affection for them. Instead, he exploited these individuals, which no doubt shows his want for domination and control of others. This charismatic behaviour is simply a façade, a social mask he uses.
Riddle's public persona can be understood through the lens of pathological narcissism. All humans naturally present a public mask, but for a pathological narcissist, the discrepancy between this mask and the concealed self is honestly stark. Riddle's charming demeanour was used as a strategy to attracted admirers who no doubt fed his own narcissistic needs. This mask is also used to protect his false self from exposure, maintaining his grandiose self-image.
The narcissist's primary goal is to protect and sustain this concocted self-image. This can be visualised as a wheel, where the grandiose false-self is the hub, to which are affixed spokes. These have a specific purpose to protect and sustain the hub of false-self.
Freud's theory on the oral phase highlights the crucial role of the mother in a child's early development, fostering a sense of comfort and dependency to the mother. According to Minderop, parental influence can change the development of the human personality. Looking at these theories, who both stress the importance of parental involvement early in development and how detrimental the lack of it could be, we can attribute Riddle's lack of parental affection and the resulting emotional deprivation significantly contributing to his behaviour and attitudes. These theories support the idea of how Riddle had never seen anyone as an equal, clearly taking advantages of his followers and viewing them as below him.
Riddle's identity and beliefs were deeply intertwined with his blood status. Discovering his ancestry linked to Salazar Slytherin, which would boost his ego and sense of self incredibly, fuelling his delusions on his "idealised parent image." Then came along the revelation of his Muggle father, which shattered his preconceived notions of heritage. This discovery would obviously induce an identity crisis in the boy, igniting a war within him between the person he wants to be and the reality of who he really is. This internal conflict most likely manifested in his actions, such as punishing his father and changing his name. (Riddle's mental breakdown and identity-crisis explained more here.)
Freud states that human behaviour is more influenced by the unconscious mind than the conscious one. The unconscious mind is filled by the humanâs painful memories and then tries to protect the conscious mind by hiding them. This can influence someoneâs attitude, behaviour and character. For Riddle, the painful memories of his heritage continually resurfaced, despite his unconscious minds attempt to hide them. This is something that is extremely relevant to his views on pure-blood supremacy. He attempts to eradicate his past, such as changing his name to Lord Voldemort and creating Horcruxes show his struggle with his own identity clearly.
(Iâm sure we all know what Voldemort actually means. Ironically enough, Riddle was so grandiose ( what a romantic, no really, he was.) as to aim to transcend humanity, (changing his name, horcruxes etc.) that by refusing to accept the inevitably of death, he also practically announces his own humanity to the world.)
Riddle's descent into blood supremacy was fuelled by a combination of person and political factors. There is the abuse he suffered from Muggles, the war he had experienced, the prejudices he encountered in Slytherin, the group of followers he gathers, and his psychopathic tendencies that all contribute to his ideology. ( Riddle cravings of power and the feeling of being in control added onto everything else, honestly makes me think of only one thing; revolution. )
Riddle's appeal to pure-blood ideologies served his ambitions, allowing him to manipulate and control those who would've previously have looked down on him. This pursuit of power mirrors the actions of many world leaders and revolutionaries who sought to reshape the world according to their ideal image. The ideal image is fuelled by internal conflict between his own past and his preconceived ideas.
(This was most likely the intended purpose for his character, as he himself is a malignant narcissist, and many psychiatrists have identified a direct connection between malignant narcissists and evil. Many well-known malignant narcissists are also serial killers and mass murderers.)
Little note I also wanted to add on even if it delves more into Voldemort territory than Riddle; Voldemort seems to punish the Pure-bloods. What I mean by this is, is that Riddle seems to be taking out the fact these pure-bloods are not the ones to usually do this kind of 'dirty work' . He seems to enjoy making them do things that they would normally view as beneath them, it's a power trip. This seems to be more retribution on his end, considering the fact despite how hard he tries he will never be a pure-blood and will never be able to leave his past behind him. (what a petty man ) TLDR : Looking into Riddle's views on Pureblood supremacy reveals a complex interplay of narcissism, early developmental influences, and political motivations.
#once again did not proofread so ignore any mistakes#what a miserable man#Harry Potter#hp fandom#harry potter fandom#hp fanfic#Tom Riddle#Tom Riddle analysis#tom riddle x reader#tom riddle fanfiction#VOLDEMORT#Tom Marvolo Riddle#Lord Voldemort#Slytherin#Pureblood#Muggle#harry potter headcanon#opinion#headcanon#the death eaters#the knights of walpurgis#the heir of slytherin
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TOM RIDDLE - soulmates donât exist PT. 2
SDE MASTERLIST - x FEM!reader (POC!friendly)
SUMMARY: everything changes for you when snape gives you a certain memory. will you be able to do the task that dumbledore has given you?
WORD COUNT: +3.7k
GENRE: angst-ish (but not really)
CONTENT WARNING: soulmate & time travel au, english is not my first language. muggle studies is basically what we get in school
The corridors of Hogwarts were eerily quietâalmost too quiet in the early morning light. You wandered around Hogwarts, taking in the atmosphere. It was just how you remembered life before the war. But you had to act as if you didnât know, act as if you didnât know your way around Hogwarts. Your heart was still racing from the overwhelming disorientation of time travel. The walls seemed taller, the stones beneath you felt somewhat smoother. It felt the same but yet so different at the same time.
You had no clue what to do next. The task lay plain ahead of youâfind Tom Riddle and alter the course of his life by becoming his great love. You shook your head; you knew how time travel could have a big effect on the timeline. You never took Muggle Studiesâmainly because of the mathsâbut you knew what this could do. Once he saw you, it would be done. There would be no going back, well, it wasnât like you could turn back whenever you wanted.
But, it was like Hermione said, âNo one is supposed to see you.â Only this time, it was different. If you didnât change Tom Riddle for the better, you could make him even worse than he was in your time.
âI believe you may be a bit out of place, my dear.â
You stopped dead in your tracks, your heart almost leaping out of your chest. The voice was warm, kind, but still serious. You recognized the voice. You turned and saw Dumbledore standing there, a somewhat younger version.
You knew he was still a professor at this time. His auburn hair was tinged with a lot of strands of silver, his robes a deep shade of purple. His piercing blue eyes gleamed with curiosity and suspicion as he looked at you. He raised an eyebrow, and his lips curled into a gentle, knowing smile. You wanted to slap him, angry for making you do this, while telling you absolutely nothing.
âYou look as though you've been wandering these halls for quite some time,â he continued, stepping toward you. âAnd yet, I don't recall seeing you in any of my classes.â  Â
You swallowed hard, your mind scrambling for a good answer, but you came up empty-handed. Dumbledore's gaze was patient, waiting for you to speak.
âUhh... Iââ you began, your voice shaking softly, but you stopped. What could you say? What were you supposed to say? That you had just traveled back into the past to stop one of his students from becoming the biggest and darkest wizard of all time?
Dumbledore's eyes softened. âWhy don't we take this conversation somewhere a bit more private?â he suggested, his tone gentle. âI have a feeling there's more to your story than a lost stroll through the castle.â
Without waiting for your response, Dumbledore turned around, motioning for you to follow him. You hesitated for a second, but the calmness in his demeanor somehow reassured you. Reluctantly, you followed him down the corridor, your footsteps echoing softly in the stillness of the morning.
After a while, you arrived at an empty classroom, the large wooden door creaking as Dumbledore pushed it open. Sunlight entered through the tall, narrow windows, casting long shadows across the rows of desks. The air was filled with a faint scent of parchment and chalk, just like his.
Dumbledore gestured to a chair near the front. âPlease, sit down. Make yourself comfortable.â
You did as he asked, feeling out of place in this familiar yet unfamiliar world. Dumbledore remained standing in front of your desk for a moment, studying you with those sharp, calculating eyes. âThere is something... remarkable about you,â he said quietly, his voice kind. âYouâre not quite where youâre supposed to be, are you?â
You looked at your shoes, realising you also didnât quite look the part to simply be lost. âNo,â you admitted. You knew lying to a man like Dumbledore would do you no good. âIâm... not?" you said, unsure.
Dumbledore nodded, as if he had expected that answer. âTime,â he mused, his eyes twinkling with understanding. âIt has a peculiar way of bending when we least expect it.â
Your head snapped up, meeting his gaze. He knew. He definitely knew. âHow?â you breathed, the question slipping out before you could stop yourself. âHow did youââ
Dumbledore raised his hand to quiet you. âI have my ways,â he smiled. âBut more importantly, it seems you have a very important reason for being here.â
You swallowed, feeling the enormity of your âmissionâ pressing down on you, but in Dumbledoreâs presence, it felt a little less overwhelmingâthough you were still angry he hadnât told you anything sooner. He waited, giving you space to explain.
After a pause, you spoke again. âI was sent... to change something. Something that will affect the future,â you hesitated, unsure how much you were allowed to reveal. âIt's about Tom Riddle.â
At the mention of Riddle's name, Dumbledore's expression didn't change, but you noticed the slightest shift in his demeanour. His gaze became more focused, and he leaned forward slightly.
âTom,â he repeated softly. âYes... I've always known there was something... special about that boy.â
Special? More like dangerous. You nodded. âIf I don't change him, if I can't make him different... the world will fall into darkness. Everyone I love, my friends...â you stopped. Your parents. You hadnât even thought of them. Your heart started banging in your chest. You wanted to go back. Tell them that you were grateful for everything, and that you were sorry for leaving them behind out of nowhere.
Dumbledore didnât react with surprise. He nodded. âDo not worry about your friends or family.â He sighed softly. âYou have been given a great responsibility. But changing the course of someone's life is no simple task, especially when that personâs soul is... so deeply marked.â
You looked down at your hands. âI donât even know if itâs possible.â
For a moment, Dumbledore was silent, his gaze fixed on you with empathy. âNothing is impossible, but you must remember, even the darkest of souls have their choices. Tom Riddle's path has always been his own. You may be able to guide him... but ultimately, it is up to him who or what he becomes.â
His words hung in the air, a reminder of what you were facing. âKnow that I will be watching, and if you ever need guidance, you know where to find me.â
Dumbledore had insisted on introducing you to the Headmaster as a transfer student, emphasizing that no one could know the truth. The fewer people involved in the truth, the better.
You made your way through the corridors of Hogwarts with Dumbledore. Students were scattered around, laughing, talking in hushed voices, completely unaware of the darkness that would be coming.
Dumbledore said the password to the Headmaster's office. It was the same as he had used. So original. The spiral staircase came into view as the gargoyles started moving. You followed your former Headmaster up the stairs. The office was filled with old books, a large desk, and a few moving portraits on the walls. It looked almost the same as Dumbledore's office.
Behind the desk sat Headmaster Armando Dippet, a tall, thin man with kind eyes. âAh, Albus,â Dippet said, rising from his seat to greet him. âWhat brings you here?â
Dumbledore gestured to you. âHeadmaster, I would like to introduce you to our newest transfer student.â He gave you a small nod to encourage you to take a step forward. âShe's come from Beauxbatons and will be joining us for the rest of her schooling.â
Dippet's eyebrows rose in surprise. âA transfer from Beauxbatons? How delightful! We don't often have students join us from abroad.â He looked at you. âWhat is your name, my dear?â
You swallowed, your nerves tightening your throat. âY/n L/n.â You smiled at the Headmaster. âI'm honored to be here.â
âIt's always wonderful to have new students join us at Hogwarts. The castle can seem quite large and scary at first, but I'm very sure you'll grow accustomed to it in no time,â Dippet smiled at you.
You forced back a smile. Normally, you would love such pleasantries, but now? Absolutely not. It felt as if you wanted to throw up.
Dumbledore stepped forward. âHeadmaster, Iâve already informed Y/N of the basic rules and traditions of the school, but I do believe the Sorting Hat will handle the rest?â
âIndeed,â Dippet nodded, motioning to a nearby shelf where the Sorting Hat was in its usual place. âNo time like the present.â
Your heart raced when the Sorting Hat was placed upon your head. You knew what house you had once belonged to, but would it be the same here? In this time?
âHmm...â the hat murmured after whining about who dared to wake him up. âInteresting... very interesting. Youâre not like the others Iâve sorted. Ever.â
You held your breath.
âI see loyalty... with a lot of bravery,â the hat mused. âA fierce desire to do whatâs right, even when itâs proven difficult. Courage, and thereâs something more than that... something deeperâŚâ
Did it know? You shifted uncomfortably in your seat, huffing out a breath.
âAh,â it whispered. "But that is not for me to uncover. Your place, however, is clear.â
Another moment passed, and then the hat shouted, âGryffindor!â
The word rang in your ears. You werenât placed in the same house. Your former house was Hufflepuff. What changed? The house of loyalty, hard work, and kindness. Maybe this could help ground you. Most Hufflepuffs you knew were kind (mostly high as well) and helpful. There were always exceptions, but you were happy with that house.
Dippet clapped his hands together, clearly pleased. âA Gryffindor! A fine choice indeed. Youâll find good company there.â
Dumbledoreâs expression remained calm. âIt seems that your path is set,â he said quietly, his eyes twinkling with that wisdom he always had.
As the hat was lifted from your head, you stood up from the stool you had taken a seat on. Gryffindor. It was unexpected, but not wrongâor bad. In some way, it made sense for you. You needed to be brave to talk to Tom Riddle. So, what better house for that than Gryffindor?
The Headmaster waved his wand, and a piece of parchment floated over to you. âHereâs your timetable, Y/N,â he said, handing it over to you. "Youâll begin classes immediately. Iâm sure the others will help you find your way.â
You took the parchment, scanning the schedule. You had loads of free periods, and as always, an Astronomy class at midnight on a Friday night.
âThank you, Headmaster,â you said quietly, tucking the parchment under your arm.
Dippet smiled. âWelcome to Hogwarts, Y/N. I hope your time here will be both enlightening and rewarding.â
âI sure hope so,â you nodded. Rewarding. You could use the reward of going home.
You and Dumbledore left the office. Going down the staircase, the air felt cooler. Dumbledore walked beside you in silence.
âSo, youâve been placed in Gryffindor,â Dumbledore broke the silence. âA good choice. Youâll find a community of loyalty and bravery there.â
You nodded. âI didnât expect it.��
âSometimes,â Dumbledore said with a smile, âthe unexpected paths are the ones that lead us exactly where we need to go. You have been given a second chance, in more ways than one.â
âAnd remember,â he said softly, âthe fewer people who know your true purpose, the better. Riddle must never know why youâre really here.â
You nodded.
When you stepped inside the Gryffindor common room, you immediately felt the warmth. There was a soft red glow from the lanterns, and the walls were lined with rewards and books. The smell of fresh cookies hung in the air.
A group of students was clustered around a table and looked up as you entered. It was already early in the morning, and you wondered why most students were up at this time. The faces of the students were curious but friendly, and a wave of relief washed over you. Before you could take another step, a girl with curly dark hair and a wide smile broke away from the group.
âHi!â she greeted enthusiastically, her eyes wide with interest. âYou must be the new transfer student! Iâm Maeve, Maeve Miller.â
You tried your best not to grimace as you forced a smile. âIâm Y/N L/N.â The realization of having to meet and make new friends dawned on you even harder.
âProfessor Dippet had owled us. We were all curious, yâknow? Transfer students arenât that common. Youâre lucky itâs the start of the school year!â
You smiled at Maeveâs happiness, but you were still baffled at how fast news spread in Hogwarts. I mean, you had literally just left Dippetâs office.
âIâll make sure you fit right in. Iâll show you to the dormitory,â Maeve smiled.
You followed her to a spiral staircase. As you walked with Maeve, she chatted happily about the house traditions, the upcoming Quidditch match, and the best way to sneak extra food from the kitchen.
Once you reached the dormitory, you found yourself in a circular room with soft, warm lighting. You saw only one vacant bed â in the middle â with your belongings neatly placed beside it. A suitcase you recognized, though it felt strange seeing it here. You had basically come empty-handed, so how were all your belongings here already?
â How...?â you trailed off, confused.
Maeve caught your confusion. âProfessor Dumbledoreâs pretty amazing, isnât he? He made sure your belongings were here from yesterday evening. Mustâve used some magic to get your stuff here so quickly.â
You nodded, even more confused. You didnât even know you had time-traveled yesterday. You had no idea how, and you didnât want to think too much about it before it might drive you mad.
âSo, obviously, thatâs your bed,â Maeve pointed towards the bed with your belongings on it. âAnd this is mine,â she added, pointing to the bed next to yours. âWeâll be neighbors! Oh, and these are your other roommates.â
Two other girls approached, one with long red hair and freckles, and the other with short brown curls. They introduced themselves as Alicia and Lilith, both offering you warm, welcoming smiles.
âNice to meet you,â Alicia said, while Lilith gave you a small, shy wave. âItâs so exciting to have someone new join us, especially in our fifth year!â
âIâm glad to be here!â you lied through your teeth.
âWell, weâre heading to breakfast in a bit if you want to join us,â Alicia offered. âBut Iâm sure youâll want to settle in first.â
âYeah, you guys go ahead, Iâll catch up with you in a while,â you replied with a nod and a smile.
As the girls made their way out, leaving you alone, you felt disoriented. This was all going too fast. You needed a moment to yourself. Normally, you would have already been in your last year. You made your way over to the small adjoining bathroom. The light was bright. You stepped in front of the large mirror, ready to see your face full of scars and dirt from the war.
But no, your fingers trembled slightly as you reached up to touch your face. Staring back at you was a younger version of yourself â exactly as you had looked in your own fifth year at Hogwarts. Your features were softer, untouched by the weight of the war. Your eyes looked brighter... they hadnât seen the horrors that awaited. No pair of eyes should see a war go down.
It was all surreal, like looking at a stranger. It was clear the potion had not only sent you back in time, but also transformed you to match the age you needed to be.
For a moment, the reflection blurred as tears welled up in your eyes. You had been thrust back into your younger self, in a world you didnât belong in. You took a deep breath, swallowing the fears and tears away. You could do this. You had to do this. For your friends and family.
The first day at Hogwarts felt surreal. The familiar sounds of students chatting in the Great Hall, the smell of freshly made food, and the sight of enchanted candles floating above made you feel like you had stepped back into a dream. You knew there was a big chance that Tom Riddle was here, in the same room as you.
But before you could worry about him, you had to get through your first day as just another transfer student.
You found yourself sitting at the Gryffindor table with your roommates and their friends. âSo, what was Beauxbatons like? Iâve heard itâs incredibly fancy, with all those grand fountains everywhere,â Maeve spokeâa good friend from Lilith, you noted. You could see how she was the one who helped Lilith blossom open as a shy person.
You hesitated for a second, remembering Dumbledoreâs warning to keep it simple. You gave her a small smile. âItâs different from Hogwarts. Especially since there are a lot more boys here than I'm used to.â
Lucas, a boy with a head full of black curls, looked up. âHogwarts has its charm. Luckily you were sorted into Gryffindor. You seem like a cool person, and everyone knows it's the best house.â
Alicia was flipping through your timetable, trying to figure out if you had any classes with your Gryffindor friends. âWeâve got Defense Against the Dark Arts first thing! I'm hoping for some practical lessons today. Spells, maybe,â Alicia's eyes widened with excitement.
Your stomach dropped slightly after Lucas mentioned there was a big chance youâd have a class with the Slytherins and a few Ravenclaws. Given Riddleâs obsessive interest in the subject, there was no doubt he would be in this class.
You offered a casual nod. âDefense Against the Dark Arts should be interestingâŚâ
After the five of you finished breakfast, you gathered your books and made your way to your first class of the day. The halls were busy with students, most of whom paid little attention to you, though a few curious glances lingered.
Once you reached the DADA classroom, you found yourself standing at the doorway. You hoped for a normal teacherâwhen you were at Hogwarts before, every year there was a teacher with the weirdest background ever. The classroom was large, with desks arranged in neat rows, and the walls were lined with various defensive artefacts.
You let your eyes wander around the room. There, near the middle, sat Tom Riddle.
He was exactly as you had imaginedâtall, dark-haired, and composed. His sharp features and cold eyes stood out even among your classmates. He exuded an air of authority and confidence. The other students around him seemed to ignore him. You wondered why. Were they scared of him, or did they think he was a weirdo?
You quickly tore your gaze away from the back of his head before he sensed you staring. âCome on,â Maeve whispered. âWe don't want you to be late on your first day.â
You nodded and walked toward a vacant seat next to Lucas. The professor was a stern-looking man with a neatly trimmed beard. He immediately launched into a discussion of the most advanced spells, his tone brisk and matter-of-fact.
It was pretty hard to focus with the presence of Tom Riddle in the room. Every now and then, you dared to glance at him, watching as he listened intently, his expression focused and serious. You had no idea how you were supposed to change him. He already seemed so... unreachable.
Halfway through the class, the professor called for everyone to pair up for duelling practice. Maeve grabbed your arm, her eyes sparkling with excitement.
âPartners?â she asked eagerly.
âOf course,â you replied, grateful for the distraction.
You and Maeve moved to an open space in the classroom, pulling out your wands as the professor demonstrated a series of defensive spells. You followed along, trying to keep your movements smooth and controlled. Thankfully, the practice went well, and Maeve seemed impressed.
âYou're really good!â she said after successfully blocking one of your spells. âYou must have had excellent teachers at Beauxbatons.â
You smiled and nodded at her praise. As you practiced with Maeve, you couldnât help but notice Tom a few spaces away, duelling effortlessly with a Slytherin boy. His movements were precise, fluid, as if he had been born with a wand in his hand. It was clear to anyone watching that he was far more advanced than most students his age.
Finally, when the class came to an end, you packed up your things, trying to avoid looking at him as you left the room with Maeve, Lilith, Alicia, and Lucas.
âNext up is Transfiguration,â Alicia said, checking her timetable as you all walked down the corridor. âIâm actually looking forward to that one.â
The rest of the day passed in a similar blur. Transfiguration was more manageableâProfessor Dumbledore, who taught the class, gave you a small, knowing smile when he saw you, though he treated you no differently than the other students. You worked on basic transformations alongside your friends, though your mind kept drifting back to Defense Against the Dark Arts and the presence of Tom Riddle.
Potions came next, with Professor Slughorn as the teacher. He welcomed you to the class with open arms, making sure you had everything you needed. It was weird since you'd already met him, just when he was a bit older. Lucas was quick to show you around the room, helping you find ingredients and sharing tips for the potion you were brewing.
âSlughornâs a bit of a collector,â Alicia whispered as you carefully added a pinch of powdered unicorn horn to your cauldron. âHe loves students with⌠potential. But heâs nice, at least.â
âHeâs even got a club,â Lilith quipped quietly.
By the time you reached your last class of the day, Charms, the exhaustion of trying to keep up appearances had settled deep in your bones. Yet, your new friends kept the energy alive. Alicia was quick with jokes, and Lucas had a dry, witty humor that balanced Maeve's enthusiasm. And Lilith was just there, enjoying her friendsâ energy.
a/n: quick chapterrrr, part three will be coming out next week (probably or sooner)
my little taglist <3
@optimisticsandwichgladiator
@artistadistrada2002
@hueanhdang
#lizzieswritesđđ#âsoulmates don't existâ#girl writer#tom riddle#tom riddle x reader#tom riddle x y/n#tom riddle x you#harry potter x reader#harry potter x you#x reader
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Dark Tom Riddle x Muggle! Reader (Things he would say to you)
"Speaking with those filthy muggle friends of yours"
"I know that you are also a muggle, you don't have to remind me every time"
"I got rid of them for your safety, stop being ungrateful"
"If I was truly evil, you would have been dead right after you spoke to ex-boyfriend"
"Don't be silly, naive muggles such as yourself couldn't possibly survive on their own"
"If you cross me, I might have to take drastic action."
"You donât get to have an opinion, you don't know what is best for you, love"
"Stop crying, it's just a hug"
"I show my love with actions not with silly words"
"I gave you too much freedom, you are not allowed out of the house from now on"
"Maybe the Imperius curse will fix your horrible behavior"
#yandere tom riddle#tome riddle x reader#tw: toxic relationships#reader insert#harry potter#possessive#obsessive#love#hate#mind control
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i wanna see the slytherin boys and a muggle reader who loves to crochet things for then and gift them crochet stuff âĄâĽď¸âĄ
SLYTHERIN GUY'S REACTION TO YOU CROCHETING THEM STUFF | â§âşă
Pairing : (Mattheo , Tom , Theodore, Lorenzo, Draco) x reader
Notes : lmao this one is actually kinda cute and very fluffy , tysm for the request and I hope you like it!! Each one is getting a different crochet stuff so yeah :)
Also if you can plz lmk which reaction y'all liked the most or which guy's part you like the most in whatever reaction you read on my blog so I can write in a similar way đ§¸đ§¸
Warnings : none coz this is pure fluff ><
MATTHEO RIDDLE
Bro is constantly annoying you and trying to get your attention while you crochet . He'd be trying all sorts of stuff like making funny faces or litteraly picking you up , but you'd scold him if you loose the thread and he'd look like a kicked puppy :) After you're done you'd hand him a scarf , similar to your house colors so that if he wears it outside it'll blend with the uniform .
He would be all like "i can't wear that out darling" And when you'd ask why he'd say that he's too manly to wear something cutesy like that and that he has an image to maintain . The next day you'd catch him wearing it while he smoked with his friends đşđť
TOM RIDDLE
Mr marvalo has no reaction whatsoever when you hand him the cute crocheted bunny . He'd just nod and put it in his pocket kissing your head . Doesn't utter a single word . He finds it ridiculous - ridiculously cute but he throws the thought as soon as it comes . He'd rather be called a Hufflepuff than admit that he finds something cute coz pfttt?!?
He's a smartass though so he'd make that bunny - a horcrux . It's the first thing you made by yourself and he loves it so dearly that he splits his soul for it , besides who are you kidding no one would suspect a crocheted bunny to be the dark lord's horcrux .
THEODORE NOTT
He has a greatt fashion sense (that's something for being an Italian man y'all ) and he absolutely . loves . when you crochet him stuff . You often make him sweaters and gloves and he proudly wears it , his style adding charm to your stuff .
He also boasts it to his friends . Believe it or not he'd kinda have a fashion show upon everyone's request . He'd have a blank face (his resting bitch face) while he walks a straight line towards the couch filled by his friends , showing off the knitted sweater pretending to be a model as you laugh with mattheo . Also makes you stand up at last for credits offcourse.
LORENZO BERKSHIRE
My guy is in absolute love with you and tries to engage in everything you do so when you gift him a crocheted bouquet , he firstly squeaks like a girl upon recieving it and then tries to make a bouquet for you aswell . Him trying to learn crochet is like a love letter to you .
But in the process of making it , he turns it into a competition đđ when he finshes making it and all your lovey dovey stuff is over he'd joke that his bouquet is better than yours ( it wasn't.) Also hattsoff to him because he bears all the teasing of his friends trying to make it for you . Pure gentlemen istg uggh
DRACO MALFOY
He doesn't like muggle things so he'd go blabbering about why you're doing it on your own when he can just sway a hand and it will be made by itself. ( So much for having a magic wand little boy đ) Would be grumbling and yapping for HOURS and would finally shut up when you shove his miniature crocheted version in his face .
He be sooo shocked , stuttering and fumbling with his words . Heart eyes for real . Would absolutely love it and he'd keep it with him all the time , he loves you and well his mini self aswell .
ăăăăăâ§ăăăăâşă ă ăă
TAGLIST : @sugarcandydoll @helendeath
#đ¸ď¸â§âşăjiho's masterlist#đ¸ď¸â§âşăharry potter's work#đ¸ď¸â§âşăslytherin boy's work#slytherin boys#slytherin boys x you#slytherin boys smut#slytherin boys x reader#tom riddle x y/n#tom riddle x reader#tom riddle smut#mattheo riddle x reader#mattheo riddle smut#theodore nott x reader#theodore nott smut#lorenzo berkshire x reader#lorenzo berkshire smut#draco malfoy x reader#draco malfoy smut#harry potter yandere#harry potter x y/n#yandere harry potter#harry potter x reader#harry potter smut#slytherin x reader#yandere slytherin#yandere tom riddle#theodore nott x y/n#lorenzo berkshire x you#blaise zabini#blaise zabini smut
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â for the love that used to be here. tom riddle x reader
summary. you and tom are the only muggle-borns in slytherin, until one day he isnât.
tags. angst, afab reader who is referred to as a witch a few times and rooms with girls but i don't think i ever use she/her pronouns or say the word girl/woman, biggest warning is that this is SO long (idk what compelled me to write a year 1 â post-hogwarts fic but here we are twenty thousand damn words later), blood purity and bigotry, dumbledore is greatly offended by the bonding of two orphans until he can capitalise on it, frequent wwii mentions (specifically the blitz), book clerk tom, MURDERER TOM⌠ministry reader, kissing, smut once theyâre 21/22 May all the minors in the room exit at once, more angst, sad ending kinda, me spreading a very personal and very nefarious tom riddle agenda that is canon to ME but probably only like two other people
note. i need a shower and an exorcism after writing this shit. i'm exhausted. i don't even remember half of it. but i'm also SO stoked, this is my little (very large, frankly) 100 followers celebration! i've only been on here for about a month and the love has been so crazy so thank you mwah mwah mwah âĄ
word count. 21.8k (i know... i KNOW)
You learn quickly that your shade of green is not the same as theirs. The rest of them are emeralds, even at that age â they glitter with their parentâs polish. You are flotsam, sea-sick, envy green; the putrid boiling stuff that brews in your cauldron when you look away for a second too long, and, really, itâs more of a stain than a colour at all. There is a fraction of a second where you find something powerful in that. You are not an easy thing to remove. And then itâs gone, because they want to so badly.
You learn, with a bit less tact, that you doesnât actually mean just you; that itâs you and him whether you like it or not.
He evidently does not.
âIt has to be completely fine,â Tom says to you in Potions, his voice small then but just as practised.
You narrow your eyes. ââScuse me?â
âI said the powder has to be completely fine.â
âI heard you completely fine. I know how to read.â
He stares blankly at you before returning to his own station, and thatâs that.
It isnât unheard of for muggle-borns to be sorted into Slytherin, so youâve been told, but one glance around your common room and you can see itâs pretty damn rare.
Thereâs Tom Riddle, thereâs you, and thereâs a seventh-year girl whose knuckles are always white like sheâs spent so long with her hands balled into fists that they donât know how to do anything else. Tom Riddle is a prat, the girl is too old and unapproachable even if she wasnât, and you are very good at being alone.
That decides it. Flotsam still floats.
Everything is â fine. Itâs fine for months; you have no one and need no one and sometimes you catch a jinx in the back of Charms that zips your mouth shut or bends a foot the wrong way (a cruel reminder of how much more these people know than you) and your broom occasionally pivots so sharply the Flying professor has to stop you from careening into a wall and breaking enough bones for a weekâs worth of Skele-Gro, but itâs fine.Â
âŚItâs just that heâs insufferable.
The boy is eleven years old and he speaks like heâs stealing glances at an invisible lexicon between every word, more refined than any of the orphans you grew up with which makes you wonder which sort heâs surrounded by, and you take it upon yourself to theorise in passing if you could ever scare him badly enough his real voice would slip and he might just appear human for once.
Only it becomes clear when youâre stirring awake in the Hospital Wing after a mysterious bout of dragon pox (conveniently, all the pureblood children developed an immunity after catching it young) has rendered you bed-ridden and pockmarked, that you donât think anything can scare Tom Riddle. Heâs suffering just as well in the bed beside yours to keep the contagion to the two of you, and heâs all cold, eddied rage under sallow skin and beetling bones.Â
âTheyâre going to kill you,â he says after three days of silence, when the room is dusted in moonlight so thin itâs like squinting through cinema noise or mohair fluff to try to see him.
You blink at the vague shape of him. âWhat?â
âIf you donât hurt them back, eventually, theyâll just kill you.â
In hindsight, itâs an assumption so hastily bleak only a scared child could make it.
I want to hurt them, you try to say, but for what follows you cannot: I want to hurt them but Iâm not good enough to do it.
You roll over and pretend to sleep, and in the morning, you hurt them anyway.
Itâs Avery whoâs unlucky enough to be the first to test you when youâre three assignments behind in Transfiguration, still a bit groggy from your last dose of Gorsemoor Elixir, and actually, physically green. He tugs your hair and stings your cheek with the promise of âbringing a bit of colour back to your faceâ and itâs sort of funny how banal it is compared to the other transgressions youâve been dealt â that this is the thing that makes you bare your teeth, grip your wand in a hand that still canât hold half of it, and send Avery flying across the room with a Knockback Jinx.
Tom sits with you in the Great Hall for dinner that night, and he never really stops.
You practise spells by the Black Lake between classes and heâs anything but kind about the ordeal, but you teach each other. You end your days with singe prints and sore wrists and you often take more damage than he does, but sometimes, as spring settles in with warm tones (apple and jade and moss â all the greens youâd never imagined), you leave with less bruises than he does. It hardly feels like friendship. It feels much more like purpose.
When summer comes you donât write to him, and you donât expect he will either. You donât suppose youâve actually written a letter in your life. Instead you try new wand movements under your quilt every night and wait for Augustâs departure on a big red train.
You sit together when the day does come. He asks you if youâve been practising. You frown and tell him youâre not allowed to use magic outside of school.
Second year is nothing but monotonous, antiquated theoretics. Most everyone complains. You donât see why they should â theyâre already aeons ahead of you â but that means you finally have a chance to catch up in your less-than-school-sanctioned meetings with Tom while the rest remain practically stationary.Â
Deputy Headmaster and Transfiguration professor Albus Dumbledore is imperceptibly less soft with you than he was last year when you make the apparently poor decision to sit beside Tom on the first day, and you file the subtle shift in demeanour into some mental cabinet to review later.
You find workarounds with the librarian, Madam Palles, inclined to sympathy for the poor, orphaned muggle-borns to grant relatively unfettered daytime access to the Restricted Section so long as you keep it tidy and none of the books leave the library. Thatâs where things get a bit more interesting.
For a month you remain innocuous as can be. You browse through rare historical tombs and foreign biographies that would charge more galleons than you can conceptualise, and you never leave so much as a tea stain on the parchment. You smile at the Madam when you return the key each night, and walk back to the dungeons with your hands behind your back. It is, of course, totally unrelated that a month is what it takes for Tom to master the third-year curriculumâs Doubling Charm. An entirely separate affair when you meet him in the most secluded alcove of the library, slip him the key, and stifle your grin as he duplicates it perfectly.Â
You discover Christmas break is your favourite time of the year. Nearly all the purebloods go home. The Slytherin dormitories are effectively halved.
Itâs two weeks of earnest, uninterrupted work and sleep without fear of waking up with jelly legs or whiskers.
Madam Palles, most nights, makes a slight, drowsy effort of searching the library for leftover students before she casts the lights out and closes the door. Then, it belongs to you and Tom.
Youâre splayed rather ridiculously over one of the big reading chairs on Christmas Eve, Lore of Godelot in hand, enthralled by a chapter detailing his controlled use of Fiendfyre through the power of the Elder Wand.
Tom is cross-legged and sat straight, his brows furrowed in concentration.
âWhatâve you got?â you ask, leaning over to answer your own question.
Tom as good as rolls his eyes, holding up the book to give you an easier look.
âMagick Moste Evile?â You scrunch your nose. âBit much, donât you think?â
âItâs the stuff theyâll never teach us.â
âI wonder why.â
He steals a glance at your own book and smiles in that smug way that makes you want to slap him.
âWhat, Tom?â
He shrugs. âYou might want to know youâre reading stories about the author.â
You look down. Lore of â Godelot wrote Magick Moste Evile?Â
It shouldnât really be surprising. Three chapters ago your book was recounting his months in Yugoslavia grave-robbing magical burial sites.
âWhatever,â you mumble, âItâs just a biography. Least Iâm not reading the words out of his mouth.â
âWell, theyâd be out of his quill.â
âOh my God, Tom, shut up.â
All good things must come to an end. Term resumes and your hackles are back up.Â
Abraxas Malfoy, Antonin Dolohov, Walburga Black and the best of the worst of your house have returned, sleek-haired and insatiable and deranged, truly, in such a manner that you donât think you can be blamed for the instinct you feel every time you pass them to lunge like a wild predator or run like wild prey. All Tom does, though (and so you follow, because heâs standing with you and who has ever done that?) is meet their gazes with equal assuredness. He never seems bothered. He never seems animal. You are still all hammering heart and heavy lungs, and you are learning not to see the world through the eyes of someone whoâs only ever had their fists to fight. You have magic, you remember. Youâre good at it. You could hurt them, if you really wanted.
Not much is different that summer than the last. The war is hard. The food is hard to chew. You chip a tooth. Youâre too afraid to fix it with the Trace on you, but you still smile because you will, and everyone seems put off by that. What is there to smile about?Â
You suppose, for them, itâs a question with few answers.Â
For you â youâre back on a big red train musing about the functions of muggle warfare with Tom Riddle, chucking a useless card from a chocolate frog out the window and moaning about how you wasted the sickle you found under your seat.
Heâs gotten very good at ignoring your theatrics and going right back to whatever it was he was talking about. And you note, unrelatedly, he almost looks like heâs learned how to open the windows at Woolâs. (You dare not suggest heâs doing something so ludicrous as sitting in the sun too, but this is a start.)
Dippet, or the Minister, or whoever it is thatâs in charge of the practicality of the curriculum, has become fractionally less stupid in the last three months.
You donât have to rely on nights in the Restricted Section or weekends at the Black Lake to actually learn something anymore. Of course, without the assistance of those illicit extracurriculars, you wouldnât be able to match up to your peers the way you are this year, but itâs nice to duel with dummies instead of motioning your wand vaguely over a desk, and you and Tom still climb the notice boards in rapid succession.Â
They hate you for it. One of your roommates makes a pointed effort each night to glare at you from her bed like those jelly legs are back on the table, Orion Black (two years younger but just as nasty as his cousin) nearly trips you on your way to Divination, Abraxas Malfoy develops what you think borders on obsession with Tom, and for once it feels almost offhand to not care about any of it.
Youâre beginning to think even at its best, Hogwarts is remarkably insufficient. This leads you to books mercifully unrestricted so you can read about a few of the other magical schools for comparison. Beauxbatons is renowned for providing most of the worlds alchemical developments, Uagadouâs early propensity for wandless magic makes it unfathomably more practical than Hogwarts, Durmstrang (though you scoff at their violent anti-muggle sentiment) teaches the Dark Arts as something beneficial rather than unforgivable, and â what do you learn here? Even with the hairâs-breadth of magical leniency youâve been allowed this year, itâs no surprise so few recognizable names in wizarding history are Hogwarts alumni.
âLet me have a look at that,â you say to Tom one evening, when heâs peering once more over the pages of Magick Moste Evile. Heâs a purveyor of knowledge in all forms, but he always seems to come back to Godelot in the end.
He raises a brow, handing it to you like your intrigue doubles his. âNo more reservations?â
âDonât get ahead of yourself. Iâm only curious.â
âCuriosityââ
âKilled the damn cat, I know.â You glare at him through the pages. âI think thatâs you, in this case though, since youâre the one in love with the bloody thing.â
He shakes his head as he reclines in the low light of the Restricted Section, muttering something that sounds like âridiculous,â or âquerulous,â or something else unimaginably fucking annoying.
You might be wrong. Retract your last quip and expunge it. If Tomâs in love with any book, itâs the behemoth dictionary heâs been spitting stupid adjectives out of since he was eleven.
But Godelotâs musings on the Dark Arts are fascinating enough that you can understand the appeal. Heâs no wordsmith, and you appreciate that in a way youâre sure Tom deems regrettable, but his points are straightforward but thoughtful in such a way you can read in them how he was guided by the Elder Wand through everything he did. Thereâs a stream-of-consciousness to them. Something doctrinal youâre surprised to enjoy for all the obligatory English creed they washed your mouth with at the orphanage.
âFind what youâre looking for?â Tom asks, combing with little interest through the tomb youâd put down in favour of his.
âIâm not looking for anything. Iâm justâŚâ You sigh. Itâs almost painful to say. âI think you were right, and â oh, shut up, donât look at me like that â I donât think weâre learning anything here. Not really; not as much as they do at other schools.â
âOf course,â he says blankly. âHence this.â
This â restricted books and furtive duels â should not be necessary.Â
âYou know thatâs not gonna be enough. For the rest of them, maybe, but not us.â
He tenses how he always does at the reminder of his difference. And you get it. Sometimes in moments like these you forget the reason youâre here in the first place. It isnât just the rebellious divertissement of two academically eager students, itâs⌠survival. What future do you have as a penniless orphan in wartorn London? What future do you have as a muggle-born Slytherin whoâs apt with a wand when there are a thousand more your age, just as skilled and twice as pure?Â
It isnât enough to be as good as them. You have to best them, and you have to do it forever.
The night stumbles into an exhaustive silence because you both know itâs true and itâs a bit too heavy right now. The answer isnât in this room. Just you. Just him. So you sit in the dark and you stare through that muffled nighttime noise playing tricks on your eyes. The worst of the world can wait until morning.Â
The worst of the world has impeccable timing.
A fault of both sides of the coin; the muggle world is a travesty and the wizarding world is just a bit fucking late, really.
So thereâs the newspaper. Itâs October first and the date reads September tenth. School owls are a joke and you canât afford anything better.
And itâs a dirty, ashen grey. It smudges your green if you ever had it at all. You were born to this and you will return to it always.
BOMBâS HAVOC IN CROWDED PUBLIC SHELTER
MOTHERS AND CHILDREN AMONG THE CASUALTIES
DAMAGE CONSIDERABLE, BUT SPIRITS UNBROKEN
All you can hope to do is pass the paper to Tom and wonder without words what youâll go home to.
The answer is very little when the summer clouds your vision with dust and you stand dumbly with your suitcase in front of nothing at all. Youâd tried your best until your departure to keep up with muggle news, but it had remained, routinely, a month behind with the owls. By the time June arrived you were still holding your breath through May. Tom had attempted to reason with Dippet for summer lodgings at the school but you were both denied in light of the exquisite mercy â the bombs have stopped! The Blitz has ended! Go back to the aftermath and make do with the craters.
Itâs a bit ironic that Tomâs orphanage survived and yours didnât. At least you can finally see what all the fuss is about.
In truth, itâs more strange than anything. You feel unreasonably like youâre impeding on a part of him that has never belonged to you (if any of him does); that place where you intersect but never draw attention to. You remind yourself you had no choice in the matter. The system puts you where it wants to, and these days the options are slim. But itâs â the walls are amber-black tile and plaster, lined with sanitary-smelling hospital beds and a cupboard per room. Per room, you think; youâve got one of those now, and with only one girl to share it with.Â
You figure the reason for the extra space is probably not one you want to know.
Anyway, you donât actually see Tom for two days. The caretakers bring you a tray of dinner thatâs vaguely warm and a bit too salty and you sleep off the debris you think you breathed in that morning, half-sated and sun-tired.
But then you do see him, and heâs in these funny uniform shorts and a thick blazer and your greeting is an offhand joke about the scandal of his knees that he doesnât seem to appreciate. He eyes your muggle clothes while you wait for your own set and you know you really donât have any room to judge.Â
He doesnât, or at least doesnât say he minds your relocation.
You spend half the summer waking up in the middle of the night to acquaint yourselves with the London tube stations, and the other half in whatever crevices of the orphanage you arenât harangued by Mrs Cole every five seconds, which are far and few between. She seems to have decided fourteen is old enough an age to worry about your intentions unchaperoned, like itâs the bloody 1800âs, and admonishes you and Tom relentlessly despite only ever finding you quietly buried in useless books.Â
You begin to miss Madam Palles and her invaluable pity. Everyoneâs an orphan here. No oneâs sorry.
âWhatâs his deal?â you ask one stuffy afternoon, reclining in your creaking seat to prop your legs on the desk.
Tom knocks them off (heâs so well-mannered that you sometimes push these little gestures of impropriety just to bother him) and glances at the target of your question. Some broad, blond boy who skitters down the corridor a shade paler than he arrived. Youâve yet to properly introduce yourself to anyone you donât have to, so names are muddy when you try to apply them to faces.
He shrugs, but thereâs a flash of something in his expression youâre fascinated to realise is unfamiliar. âHeâs an imbecile.â
â...Riiiiight, but that isnât a proper answer.â
You smile. Legs return to table. Timeworn Oxfords muddy the surface. Tom scowls.Â
âThere was an altercation last year,â he says tersely, âheâs rather fixated on the matter.â
âAn altercation.â
âVery good, that is what I said.â
You narrow your eyes and he sweeps your legs off the desk again, gaze catching the unmistakable ribbon of an old bullied scar on your shin.Â
âAnd I suppose youâre above such incidents,â he muses.
You cross your arms and huff. He always wins games like these.
Youâre grateful when you return to Hogwarts in one piece after your final night of summer is spent underground, and the certainty of knowing where youâll rest your head for the next ten months cannot be understated.Â
But the worst thing has happened, and you blame it on the flicker of a moment where you missed Madam Palles like it was some jubilant, accidental curse to ever miss anyone. A foreign thing you remind yourself never to do again.Â
Sheâs only gone and jinxed the locks to the Restricted Section so they cry like newborn Mandrakes when Tomâs replica key clicks in place.
For a second you both stand there looking stupidly at each other. Getting caught was a fear two years ago; you���d almost forgotten it was still possible.
Tom is quicker to collect himself. He grabs you by the arm and casts a Disillusionment Charm, and you donât burst running out of the library like two blurry suncatchers reflecting the candlelight as your instinct heeds; you cling to the shelves and you slither silently to the door. (Youâll make a joke about it when you can breathe.)
Madam Palles the Traitor comes heaving into the library in her nightgown, a blinding blue light baubled at the end of her wand, and itâs really just theatrical at this point to use Lumos bloody Maxima when the basic spell would do the job just fine.
âHas she suspected us the whole time?â you say on gasp once youâve made it to the dungeons.
âPerhaps someone else has,â Tom suggests.
âWhat? Malfoy?â
You think itâs a good first guess. It could have been any of the Slytherins, upon consideration, but Malfoy seemed most fixated on Tom last year and it wouldnât surprise you to learn heâd been observant enough to follow you to the library and notice you donât leave with the other students.
But Tom quashes the idea. âIâm doubtful. Malfoy is attentive, but Madam Palles is hardly partial to him.â (He had, in second year, set one of her books on fire while studying offensive spells.) âI suspect it was someone with more influence.â
Only no one has more influence than Abraxas Malfoy. The rest of the Slytherins follow him like lost pups. But then Tom might mean â
âA professor?â
âIt may be.â He says it like heâs already decided his suspect.
He is, as always, and ever-infuriatingly, correct.
Itâs that file you tucked away for later, reoccurring when you return to Transfiguration in the morning like a second epiphany: Dumbledore.
He assigns the termâs seating arrangements, which heâs never done before, and thereâs something in his tone when he pairs you with Rosier that feels intentionally like not pairing you with Tom. You donât think itâs paranoia clouding your better judgement, and by the way Tomâs gaze hardens as he takes his seat beside Malfoy, neither does he.
Dumbledore is suspicious for a number of reasons. He disappears for weeks at a time. The Prophet writes articles on his sightings in Austria and France like heâs an endling beast. Heâs being sighted in Austria and France â two notable countries in Grindelwaldâs ongoing war. Perhaps ancillary, youâve decided the charmed glass repositories he uses to hold his old artefacts are the same ones encasing the least permissible books in the Restricted Section. And if that isnât paranoia (which, youâre willing to admit, it may be) then you assume he has them so proudly on display because he wants you to know.
You consider it a warning.
Tom does not.
âJust give it up,â you hiss over a game of wizardâs chess, âI bet weâve read every book in there twice already anyway.â
His jaw ticks as the sole indicator of his annoyance, and he takes your rook. You scowl.
âTom, that man thinks youâre devil-spawn. You know heâs just waiting for an opportunity to catch you doing something wrong.â
âSo?â
It sounds so petulant you think heâs been possessed by his eleven-year-old self. Then you think he was a lot wiser at eleven.
âSo?â You make an aggressive move with your knight. âSo donât give him one!â
He stares at the board and his breath is just a trace sharper and you hate that you know him like this and no one else. You wonder if he knows you like that too, but resolve with ease that he does not. Youâre hard frowns and lewd jokes and trousers torn at the knee to bare scars with stories you wish you could forget. Thereâs no mystery there. Tom is nothing but â gordian knots and fixed expressions and little patterns to learn like the rules of this stupid game between you. You must know Tom Riddle by every atom or not at all. And that isnât a choice, really. Youâve never known anyone else.
âAre you stupid, Tom?â
You glance at the board. Heâs got Check. A terrible, true answer.
âNo,â you finish. âThen donât act like it.â
Your king glances at you and you nod. He falls. The game is resigned.
Tom acts stupid.
Dumbledore knows.
It all happens very fast.
You strike Tom harder in the arm with Confringo than is likely necessary that night, and he returns the favour with a Knockback Jinx that thrusts you into the shallows of the Black Lake.
You gasp. The cold water feels like itâs swallowing you whole when it strikes, an envelope sealed around you and licked shut for good measure. Everything holds to you, and itâs fucking November. Your senses are so overwhelmed that you forget to murder Tom the instant you sink in. You forget to do much of anything.
You wade trembling out of the lake when sense returns and Tom huffs, peeling off his robe to treat the burn on his arm.
âYouâidiâiot,â you mutter, trying to find the incantation for a warming charm but the words get stuck between your chattering teeth. âYou stole a re⌠stricted book.â
Tom glares daggers at you between his poor healing job and you scowl, mincing through the grass and grabbing his arm. âFucking imbec-cileâŚâ
Youâve done enough damage that if he were anyone else youâd be proud of yourself, and somehow, simultaneously, if he were anyone else youâd be able to manage a pinch of guilt. But heâs Tom, and you know him by every atom, so you cannot be proud, and heâs Tom â he retaliated by tossing you in freezing water and now your clothes are clinging sodden and heavy to every inch of you, so you certainly canât be guilty either.
âI borrowed it,â he says tightly. As if that means anything at all. And then he takes his robe and drapes it spiritlessly over your shoulders. âYou could attempt communication before curses.â
âI could attempt communication,â you scoff, uttering a charm to partially close the gash on Tomâs arm, âFucking h-hypocrite. I did communicate. You lied.â
âI ââ
âOmitted information? Withheld the truth? Watch your mouth or Iâll steal your fucking dictionary, Riddle.â
You swear a great deal when youâre cold and mad, apparently.
âI wonât be caught.â His calm is infuriating. âIt would hardly earn expulsion regardless.â
âIt doesnât matter! He knows itâs you! He was staring at you all class!â
âSo nothing novel then.â
âDâyou want me to blast you again?â
His lips form a flat line. No. Thatâs what you thought.
You sigh, clutching his robes in your fists to quell your trembling. âWhatâd you take, anyway? We never touch the encased stuff.â
That is, you assume, why Dumbledore was vexed enough about the whole thing to mention it in class today. A highly valuable book has gone missing, from a repository you dare conclude belongs to him, and he has to pretend all the while not to know itâs Tom who took it. You are out of the question. Theirs is some delicate vendetta you canât begin to unfurl.
âNothing anyone should miss,â Tom says, a complete non-answer as he stops to murmur a warming charm you could probably manage yourself by now.
âTom.â
âIt was an encyclopaedia. Itâs entirely in Runes. I suspect it will take months for me to decipher.â
âGodâs sake,â you groan. He really is exhausting. âI think Dumbledoreâl take his chances and loot your dorm before that happens.â
Tom wipes a stray droplet of water from your cheek. His fingers are soft. âWe should return. You look half-drowned.â
âI am half-drowned, dickhead.â
And you accost him in hushed tones the whole walk back. Runes, Tom, really? Threw me in the damn lake over a Runic Encyclopaedia? He accosts you just the same; You burned me first.
It does, in fact, take Tom months to decipher the Runes, and heâs quite secretive about it. He wonât let you see the book, wonât tell you what itâs about, wonât indulge your queries on how far heâs gotten or if itâs worth the way Dumbledore bores his eyes into the pair of you in the Great Hall with nothing but the glass of his spectacles to soften his censure. You consider â well â you consider taking your chances and looting his dormitory.
The day everything changes starts the same as any.Â
You muse over breakfast about muggle news and how the way Tom holds his wand when he casts defensive spells is too sharp when it should be circular. He argues. You soften the criticism by telling him his offensive magic is stellar but youâll always beat him in defence if he doesnât swallow his damn pride and listen to you for once. (So, really, you soften it very little.) He doesnât take Divination so you donât see him until Herbology that afternoon and heâs silent enough during the hour you share with your wormwood plant that you know heâs done it sometime between breakfast and now.Â
Tom has cracked the book.
Itâs late spring and the night takes longer to settle than it did in the winter. Errant sunbeams still sparkle on the water when you meet him by the lake, and itâs warm enough to forgo a coat.
âAre you going to tell me what itâs about now?â you ask without preamble, arms crossed over your chest as he approaches.
He hands you the book like itâs worth something to you without his explanation, but youâre intelligent enough to gather something from the illustrations of two twined snakes embroidering the cover.
âI should have suspected it sooner,â Tom says before you can comment. âBy the way Dumbledore acted when I told him⌠I should have known he would have wanted to keep it from me.â
âTom, I have no idea what youâre talking about.â
âItâs an Encyclopaedia on Parseltongue and its known speakers.â
You flip through the pages and none of it means anything. âParseltongue?â
âThe language of serpents,â Tom supplies, and the two of you walk along the edge of the forest. âItâs almost exclusively hereditary.â
âOkay, so, what â youâre trying to learn it anyway?â
âI have no need.â
You frown. âYou⌠you already know it.â
âI always have,â he says, and thereâs something almost unrestrained in his voice. Heâs proud in a new light, and it takes you a moment to understand and youâre not sure why exactly it makes your heart sink, but â
âYouâre not muggle-born.â
âNo, Iâm not. And Dumbledore knows.â
âSo, he ââ You try not to sound crushed because why should you be? Why should it matter that he isnât some exact reflection of you? Heâs at your side, heâs still there, heâll always be there â âHow does he know?â
âWhen he came to Woolâs to inform me I'd been accepted at Hogwarts. I hadnât known anything, certainly not that speaking to snakes is emphatically rare, so I asked him. He said it was ânot a peculiar gift.â Perhaps to keep my interest at a minimum.â
âWhy would he lie?â
âBecause it isnât just that Iâm of magical blood. Iâm a descendant of Salazar Slytherin.â
You canât be faulted for laughing. Itâs not often Tom makes jokes, let alone funny ones.
âThatâs good, Tom. Morgana used to have tea with my great-great-hundredth-great-grandmother, so that works out nice.â
He sighs, taking your hand and leading you further into the woods.
âAre you trying to murder me?â
âI might.â
âYouâd be the first suspect.â
âNo, I wouldnât. Youâve far too many enemies.â
Not by choice, you start to scold, and then he stops, not so far into the Forbidden Forest that youâre afraid, but far enough you understand this is not something heâd chance showing you in the open.
He closes his eyes and whispers, and itâs â decidedly not English. And you know the sound of a few other languages, at least; this doesnât sound like words at all. His consonants are pointed, his Sâs stretched, the syllables repetitive but separated by a difference in cadence someone less perceptive might not notice.Â
It shouldnât be surprising; itâs exactly what he told you, but it startles you how much it reminds you of a snake.
âTom?â you murmur, unsure at the prospect of speaking some ancient, unknown language into the air of the Forbidden Forest, and, underneath that, still reeling with the knowledge that this is real at all. Youâve pinched yourself a few times to make sure.
Thereâs a low susurration in the grass, wet with dew that catches the moonlight, and you gasp, clinging to Tomâs arm when you see the blades part in helices for the space of an adder.
âItâs all right,â Tom says softly, almost elsewhere, his eyes zeroed in on the snake. âIt wonât hurt you.â
Youâre still by the balance of his arm and some petrifying awe as he extends a hand to the grass and the adder coils around it, weaving upward to his shoulder.
âOh my God. Oh my God, Tom.â
The adder points its beady gaze at you, and Tom whispers something else in that strange language before it retreats in agreement or compliance or whatever could come close to expression on the face of a fucking snake, and maybe youâre dreaming this despite your pinching. Maybe youâve lost your mind.
âHope you didnât just tell it to bite me,â you try, and it comes out half-choked.
He smiles. Itâs partly for you and partly for this venomous little thing on his shoulder, and thatâs a bit startling. Tom Riddle smiles for adders and you and not much else.Â
âShould I?â
And all you manage, for whatever reason, is, âDonât be like them now that youâre not like me.â
Itâs out before you can stop it, welling from a small, scared place that embarrasses you to return to. A hospital bed when you were eleven. The walls of a bedroom ravaged by bombs.
Tomâs smile fades. âWeâre nothing like them.â
The thing is, neither of you know thatâs the day that changes everything.
You celebrate your fifteenth birthday in the Deathday ballroom with Tom, a stolen dinner pastry, a green candle, and a few sad ghosts. You try to learn how to dance. Tom thinks itâs silly. You tell him thatâs only because heâs upset he keeps stepping on your toes.
Summer blisters when it comes.
Some of the children take jobs as mail-sorters and steelworkers and you clasp for whatever youâre (one) allowed and (two) capable of, which isnât much. Youâre both old enough at the end of the day to explore London on your own, opting to spend as much time away from the orphanage as Mrs Cole allots, but you only have knuts and pennies and you warn Tom it would be unwise to swindle muggles and risk a letter from the Ministry. So you work where youâre needed and you eat the rationed nonsense you always do and you miss Hogwarts terribly. Itâs much the same: youâre together, youâre hungry, and youâre nothing like them.Â
And then itâs different: Tom makes Slytherin Prefect, is suddenly tall, and you wonder in fleeting moments if his face has always suited him this well.
A stupid remark. You fervently ignore it.
Fifth year begins and you have almost the same number of electives as you do core classes, Tom has duties in his new role that take much of his spare time, and despite popular belief, you and him are not a mitotic entity, so this splits you up more often than it had in previous years. Which is fine. You still have plenty of things to talk about during meals and between duels, and you reckon youâll share DADA until you graduate.
But in his absence, your attentions are forced elsewhere, and you should be grateful they land on something potentially promising.
Itâs like Transfiguration just clicks for you this year. Youâve never been the greatest at Transformation (importantly though, youâve also remained far from the worst), but fifth year launches you into Vanishment and something about that feels like a perfect equation. There are no complicated half-numerals and objects stuck between inanimacy and being â just unmaking the made. Nothing or not. Youâre fucking excellent at it. You glean the theoretics fast and then the practise comes like breathing. Even the purebloods struggle as you Vanish Dumbledoreâs Conjured garden snakes in brilliant tendrils of light. You exult unabashedly when you brush past them on the way out of class â who was it that didnât belong in Slytherin?
You say the same to Tom and he rolls his eyes, but the amusement is there.
âThink you can talk to my snakes for me?â you tease, nudging him on the path to Hogsmeade.
âIf theyâre yours, I doubt they have anything worth discussing.â
And Dumbledore is⌠a hue nearer to the man you remember from first year. He praises your improvement and smiles when you canât hide your giddiness as if equally impressed.
He doesnât shelve people the way Slughorn does (youâre dismayed to find Tom has been invited to join the Slug Club and you have not) but you think if he did youâd be rapidly climbing your way to the top. Maybe get put in one of those neat little repositories he keeps all his best treasures in.
Dumbledore does, however, offer additional assignments for those who are interested, and tasks you with a few if youâre up to the challenge.
You always are.
The Tom-Dumbledore-Encyclopaedia debacle is apparently either resolved, or your part in it forgotten.Â
Tom humours you when youâre both singed at the fingers from duelling, yours dipped in the lake while he buries his in the cold moss, about how Abraxas takes the seat beside him at every Slug Club dinner. He tells you he pretends to be very interested in the Malfoyâs business affairs and their stock in the Bulgarian Quidditch teamâs win this coming spring. He tells you he finds it amusing to let Abraxas think he can make Tom his pet. Tom says he considers searching for Salazar Slytherinâs fabled Chamber of Secrets and showing Abraxas what a real pet looks like. You smack him in the arm.
Heâs had an ego forever. He just has a few too many reasons for it now.
And maybe thatâs why you push harder in Transfiguration, dedicate the majority of your studies to it, spend your Saturday nights scrutinising advanced techniques while Tom makes nice with Potions experts and politics with people who donât even know what he is but like him anyway. Itâs patronising, of course â borderline fetishistic; not a real like â but it scares you. Tom Riddle would not allow himself to be anyoneâs pretty mudblood show pony if he didnât have an ulterior motive.
Everything changes but the observable truth that he is still insufferable.
Youâre lucky to see him twice a week if it isnât in class, and the way it starts is so slow you donât even fully understand whatâs happening until Christmas break when Abraxas stays a few extra days and leaves by Dippetâs Floo instead of the train.
You donât dare ask where Tom has vanished to in that time or why the hell Abraxas Malfoy would willingly subject himself to unnecessarily extended time at school with all his lackeys gone, and it isnât because you donât want to. Itâs because he wonât tell you himself. Itâs because youâre terrified the answer will feel like a broken promise, and youâve come to realise (itâs been there for so long; such an obvious, tiny thing that youâve never stopped to really dissect it) that itâs quite difficult to know someone at every atom and not love them a little bit.
Youâre suddenly aware of the risk of it: you love him like an inextricable piece of yourself, and, well, youâve seen war. You know what amputation looks like. Youâve seen the remains of structures designed to stand forever, and youâre strong like them â casts and gauze in all the weak spots because you remember the pain of breaking them â but those were blows dealt without the complication of loving the bombs behind them.
Tom is the green on your robes, the dragon pox tinge you sometimes think never truly faded when you look in the mirror too long, and all the shades you never imagined. Apple, jade, moss. The beginnings of emerald. (No, he couldnât be that.)Â
You wonder what the world would look like if he stole those colours back, and itâs much worse than some brutal decimation; it would leave you with too much. You would just be you without him.
So you love him into June like you always do, and you pluck his Prefect badge off on the last day of school and tell him it makes you jealous like a joke when itâs half-true.Â
Itâs raining when you walk to the train together, miserable for what should be summer but not at all remarkable in Scotland. Tom wipes it from your cheek. Your wrists are sore from vanishing bits and bobbles all night while you still can, never truly prepared for three months without magic, and you curl into your seat as soon as youâre in it. Tom wakes you up when you arrive back in London, startling you to find that you fell asleep at all.
It rains a lot that summer. Thereâs nothing much to see in the city and you canât get anywhere else (you note: the Trace cares little about broomsticks but you canât afford one of your own and flying might be the only thing Tom is bad at) so youâre stuck to the library again with a noseful of old paper and a certain prose that magical literature cannot replicate. You theorise a lifetime of reckoning with the mundane forces one to be more creative.
Perhaps itâs the cold that makes you sick. Perhaps itâs the state of your meals. Either way, your final weeks before sixth year are hell. Biblical, blazing hell.
The nurses arenât sure what it is â another influenza epidemic youâre the first in the orphanage to catch â but they isolate you immediately and thereâs not much care they can offer.Â
You hear Tom arguing with one of them outside your door but canât make out the words. Everything is dizzy, sweaty, halfway to unconsciousness but without its relief. Youâd take dragon pox over this.
Some days later (though you canât be sure because it feels like bloody centuries), heâs at your bedside, and you think even if you were lucid enough to ask what horrible thing heâd done to change the nursesâ minds, you wouldnât.Â
But you know heâs not beyond breaking wizarding law, because heâs muttering healing spells with a hand to your damp forehead, and you hazily find yourself reaching for him, trying to shake your head no.
âNot allowed,â you mumble. Your throat is sore and your nose is stuffy. You sound terrible and you probably look worse.
Tom is slightly blurry but you think heâs staring at you. You know if he is itâs with the utmost incredulity.
âNot allowed,â he repeats slowly. Itâs very easy to picture him clenching his jaw. âI wonder, if the Trace is so exact that it can detect all forms of magic, it canât also detect malady. Youâre burning â and Iâm to consider whether saving your life might be illegal?â
Heâs angry. Heâs angrier than youâve seen in a long time; and you can actually see it now. His magic courses through you and your vision clears, bit by bit, until your depth perception steadies and you realise heâs closer than you thought. His jaw is, in fact, clenched.
You move to catch his wrist and manage it this time. âTom.â
âDonât argue,â he says thinly.
âYouâll get sick.â
His face is far too neutral for the way his fingers stroke your damp cheek. âHm. Then itâs a good thing youâd break the law for me too.â
Of course heâs right â you love him. Which makes it a good thing he doesnât get sick.
Some of the younger children do. The fever comes overnight for a girl who wasnât in the orphanage last year, and it takes her by the next.
When you get back on the train to Hogwarts, the virus is circulating Britain and youâre livid.Â
What Tom said is true; you consider the Traceâs precision and the details of the laws on underage magic â how one of the technicalities is that a young witch or wizard may be absolved of the consequences if the circumstances are life-threatening. You think about how it supposedly doesnât care about broom-riding or Portkeys or Floo travel, and if the Trace is that complex, surely it understands sickness.
You only wonder if the Ministry would understand it. There havenât been any epidemics in the wizarding world since Gorsemoor cured dragon pox in the sixteenth century, and when there isnât healing magic there are antidotes and Pepper-Ups and herbs that muggles simply donât have. The fatality of a fever of all things is not something you imagine could be comprehended by the sort of people who sent you and Tom back to London in the wake of the Blitz.
Of course, the Ministry hasn't written to you, you havenât been forced in front of a representative from the Improper Use office, and you have no real reason to be upset.
You are regardless.Â
It shouldnât even be a thought: you immolating into oblivion protesting rescue because one of you might get in trouble for it.
A world youâve never much cared for is blanketed in ash and its people are dying and you canât help them. A girl is dead. Youâll return next summer and there will certainly be more.
Life is for the magical, you find. The muggles can burn.
Itâs what makes you start to panic this year, knowing youâve only got one more after it. You have no idea what youâre going to do after school, and it doesnât help that Tom doesnât appear to share the sentiment. Heâs got Head Boy in the bag and when he isnât with you heâs with Abraxas, who can surely provide him connections if whatever game Tom is playing at works (and you have no doubt it will), but itâs like you said in third year: that isnât enough for you.
You remember with a small ache that you no longer means you and him.
And then â it makes sense. You feel incredibly stupid.
âYou told him, didnât you?â you ask Tom the first opportunity you can get him alone, in the glum blue light of the Deathday ballroom on your way back from supper.
He sighs like itâs a conversation heâd hoped to put off for longer. âYouâre referring to Abraxas, I presume?â
âYouâre referring to â yes, you prick, Iâm referring to Abraxas. Of course Iâm referring to Abraxas, or are there others? Dolohov and Nott seem unusually enthralled by you, now that I think about it.â
âAnd for a reason Iâm supposed to be aware of, this is an error on my part. Should I be apologising?â
âWhy did you tell him, Tom?!â
âWhy?â he deadpans.
You throw your hands up. âOh, for fuckâs sake.â
âShall I provide you with my itinerary as well? Would you accompany me as I tour the third-years around Hogsmeade? Or can you do me the favour of trusting me to make my own decisions with the nature of my ancestry?â
âYouâre keeping something from me and thereâs a reason,â you say, stepping closer to him, âand forgive me if I want to know what it is when you were willing to tell me youâre the Heir of Slytherin and you can talk to snakes. What â what could possibly be bigger than that?â
Tom returns your approach with one of his own. His eyes are steady, dark, thick with lashes and you canât reminisce on the details of the rest of him because that would be strange for a friend to do. Stranger to do it now, when youâre angry with him and thereâs two sleeping ghosts in the corner and heâs framed by deep indigoes like the ripples in the Black Lake and â youâre doing it anyway.
To be short, heâs close, heâs very beautiful, and sometimes you despise him.
âTrust me,â he says again, without the derision of the last time. âThis will change things for us.â
You frown, but itâs a weak upset in contrast to the explosion you came in here willing to make. There were at least twenty questions you meant to ask and you only managed one.
You are not his keeper. You know that.Â
âChange them for the better, Tom,â you say on a sigh.
He blinks, and you think heâll respond with a nod or a slightly offended âof courseâ but he does not. He blinks and he just keeps looking at you. Itâs disarming. It probably resembles the way you often look at him. Thereâs a rationale somewhere; you never see each other anymore, life is so incredibly busy, maybe heâs forgotten what you look like.
And he does nod, finally, but he does it with his thumb brushing the corner of your lip.
What? Sorry. Whatâs going on?
He pulls it away like heâs heard you. âYou had something.â
Youâre almost positive you did not.
Transfiguration this year brings Conjuration, which is an advanced and welcome distraction, and even more exciting when you consider no longer having to Vanish things you have no idea how to bring back. Dumbledoreâs is one of three N.E.W.T classes youâre taking â Defence Against the Dark Arts and Alchemy besides. Itâs easily your favourite.
You share it with eleven other Slytherins and twelve Ravenclaws. Four of them are muggle-born, and itâs hard to describe the ease you feel among them because you donât think youâve ever had anything resembling ease with anyone but Tom.
Your schedule is more crammed than itâs ever been, but itâs good. Two of the Ravenclaw girls invite you to Hogsmeade every other weekend, you share butterbeers when you can afford one, you study until you collapse, you take Dumbledoreâs extra assignments and consider trying out for Chaser on one of your more restless evenings before waking up in the morning and resolving there is such as thing as too much of a good thing. Best not to get ahead of yourself.
Your contentment is remedied quickly.
Someone is found unresponsive in the dungeons. Dippet makes an announcement at breakfast that the boy isnât dead, rather, petrified. No one is quite sure the cause, but the Headmaster warns a few minor precautions, suggests a buddy system, and says that after dinner studying should remain in everyoneâs respective common rooms rather than the courtyards or library.
You know next to nothing about petrification, but the victim is muggle-born, and you suspect it was the result of a poorly performed statue curse by one of the many blood zealots in your house. The whole thing makes you hold onto your wand a smidge tighter, but youâre adamant not to let it drive you to paranoia like it would have a few years ago.
Tom nods at your theory when you manage to escape to the Black Lake together in November.
âThat isnât unreasonable,â he says. High praise.
You sink into the moss, sighing. âDo you think thereâll be more?â
He looks out onto the lake, the lapping waves, the crystalline beads that furrow them, midnight algae and flotsam you donât think you belong to anymore.
You peer up at his silhouette in the dark. âDo you think whoever did it will do it again, I mean?â
âI donât know,â he says finally, and after another pause: âbut I donât think it would be you.â
âHowâs that?â
âNo one would be senseless enough to try.â
And he sinks beside you with that, breath shaping the cold in steady, rhythmic clouds while yours are scattered. His robes brush yours and you take his arm with a sleepy hum, tracing patterns in the stars until your eyes feel heavy and he insists on taking you back to your dormitories.
One of the Ravenclaw girls, Marigold Wright, distracts you with a spare blue scarf and an invitation to her next Quidditch match. You watch from the stands and cheer as she catches the snitch to beat Gryffindor.
Itâs a bit strange â having a distraction â having a friend. Mari is kind, smart, a good study partner whoâs as keen on stepping into the advanced theoretics of Human Transfiguration a year early as you are. Sheâs funny in a vulgar way, introduces you to all her friends, shows you the best way to sneak into the kitchens, and you sometimes wonder if she was sorted wrong, but â her methods are creative, and sheâs definitely intelligent. Sheâs also definitely not Tom.
You see less and less of him and more of her, Dumbledore, the Ravenclaw common room and the pages of progressive Transfiguration methodologies. He sees less of you and more of Abraxas, Dolohov and Nott and all the other purebloods, Slughornâs soirĂŠes and Prefect meetings that cut into meals.
It happens again.
Second floor lavatory. A girl called Myrtle Warren. She isnât petrified.
Thereâs a vigil the following week and her parents are there, two muggles whose sobs wrack the Great Hall even as the students clear out. Flowers descend from the charmed ceiling, little bluebells and white chrysanthemums.
You cry that night. You canât remember the last time you cried.
This time, you donât have to seek Tom out. He catches you on your way back from Alchemy and brings you to the Deathday ballroom with a melancholy glance in your direction that you don't hesitate to follow. You realise itâs an odd place to continue to end up in, but no one else goes there and you suppose that makes it yours.
Youâve seen Tom skinny and sickly and olive green, but today his eyes are circled with veined violets and the lack of summer sun this year has whittled him grey once more. Heâs still beautiful. Heâll always be beautiful. But heâs tired and â sad â and for the six years youâve known him you arenât quite sure what to do with that.
You donât spend too long pondering it. You just hug him with the dawning newness of a thing like that; a thing youâve never done, and never really thought to do. (You ask yourself in bewilderment how youâve never thought to do it before.)
Heâs warm. Heâs uncertain. He doesnât reciprocate immediately.Â
And then he does, and you understand without caveats or concerns that you stopped having a choice in your destruction the moment you chose him. Heâs home, and thatâs going to ruin you one day.
Your arms tighten around him and his around you, the rhythm of his breath holding you to earth when you begin to float away. Nothing makes sense in this moment but the mercy that in all the death youâve seen, you swear to God youâll never see his. As long as youâre alive, he must be too.
And thereâs something to be said about the innate self-slaughter of loving a person (of loving Tom Riddle, especially): that itâll cleave you in two, that youâll say feeble things in his embrace that you should be above saying, like âIâm scaredâ, that his hand will find the back of your head and he'll tell you he knows, that that should not feel like enough but it will be. Youâll clasp your hands under black robes and hold this singular embrace together by the faulty adhesive of your fingers. Maybe youâll cry again, like your body can suddenly comprehend its capacity for it and is making up for lost time.
The first sign that something is wrong, more than the obvious grievance of the death itself, is the Ministryâs happy acceptance of Rubeus Hagrid as the culprit.
The boy is maybe fourteen years old, half-blood â half human, mind â and no one has a bad word to say about him other than he likes to keep eccentric pets. Which leads you to wonder what pet he possessed with the ability to petrify one student and kill another and what cause heâd have for it in the first place besides two terrible, miraculous accidents.
That question draws an even stranger path. Mari says over butterbeers (on her, bless her soul) that she read somewhere years ago that Gorgons can induce petrification, but that she doesnât remember much else.
One of the boys in DADA says that his fatherâs an auror, and heard from him that Hagridâs pet was some sort of arachnid. Tom deducts five points from his house after class with a scowl on his pale face, muttering about conspiracy.
The second sign that something is wrong is that only one of those things would need to be true for the entire case on Hagrid to be called into question. If Mariâs memory serves right, how the hell did Hagrid come into ownership of a Gorgon? (Could Gorgons even be owned?) If the aurorâs son is worth your credence, then what species of arachnid is capable of petrification?
You take to the library.
Unsure of where to begin and hesitant to draw attention, your research lingers into Christmas break and stalls some of your extracurriculars in Transfiguration. Tom is busy enough not to notice the new step in your routine, and youâre grateful not to have him breathing down your back, telling you youâre looking in the wrong places or you shouldnât be looking at all.
The third sign is the end.Â
You wish to retract it all. There are time-turners and memory charms and potions that could dizzy you enough to manipulate the truth; there is anything but this. Youâd suffer the consequences for the bliss of loving him with one more day before the ruin â youâd write it down to remember through the fog: look at him, duel him without wanting to hurt him, kiss him to know that you did it at least once, have him, be had. You never will again.
Heâd shown you the adder. Heâd joked about the Chamber of Secrets. Heâd spent months disappearing with Abraxas, earning the trust of the sons of the Sacred Twenty Eight.Â
And heâd killed Myrtle Warren.
So itâs statue curses and Gorgons and Tom â speaking to serpents when no one else can, buttressed by pureblood boys who want people like you dead.
Donât become like them now that youâre not like me.
Heâs something else entirely.
What do you do in a moment like this? Panting into an empty library at a revelation you wish you could unknow, fingers digging into the hickory of your desk â another memory carved among the initials and hearts; how do you stand from your chair and leave like the world outside this room is the same as it was when you entered? Thereâs nothing to orbit. You are cosmic debris, tea dregs in a barren cup, flotsam.
You stand; and you tell no one. Not even Tom.
His presence in your life is so infrequent that you donât even have to come up with excuses for your distance until three weeks after your discovery when youâre paired together in DADA to practise stretching jinxes.Â
You almost laugh. Heâs standing beside you, tall (lanky like he was when he was a boy if you look long enough) and serious, and you love him without knowing who he is anymore. Youâve skirted corners to avoid him and sat with Mari during lunch and breakfast like heâs some scorned lover to escape confrontation from and not someone who held you through a grief inflicted by his hand.Â
âYou look tired,â he says, inspecting the daisy youâd been tasked to elongate.
You glance at him. You are tired. Itâs exhaustive, bone-deep, aching like nothing youâve ever known, and maybe thatâs why you can look at him and smile sadly instead of thrashing against his chest screaming for what he did. You suppose it happens enough in your head to satisfy. When you can sleep, you sleep to the thought of it. The waking moments are just blank.
âMhm,â you hum, transfiguring the daisy stem back to its regular length.
Tom observes it with curious eyes. âYouâre getting good at that.â
âIâve been good at it.â
His lips turn, a small frown before he puts it away. You make the observation that heâs tired too; there are still bags under his eyes and his hands tremble ever-so-slightly with his wand when he loosens his grip on it.
His own doing and still you flicker with some relentless hope that he's drowning in regret.
âSorry,â you say. A ridiculous thing. Do you intend to slowly push him from your life with weak disinterest and diverging academic avenues? As if he were something extricable. Heâd never let you.
Youâll have to confront him, and thatâs a revelation that holds its weight on your chest until you think you'll suffocate under it.
Youâre in the blue light of the Deathday ballroom with a face you've never worn before when it happens, deep into spring, and you know then that you were wrong all those years ago.
He sees all of you.
Takes you in in the flash of a second and maybe itâs your quivering jaw that reveals you or the flint of betrayal in your eyes waiting to be struck and lit. Yes, you were wrong â Tom Riddle knows you at every atom too.
âAre you going to let me explain?" he asks before any hello. His jaw is tight but thereâs nothing else to go on to judge his disposition. He's settling into impassivity like an animal drawing its shell. You will not be allowed in if you're going to make it hurt, and you might be the only one who can.
âExplain," you copy with a hard exhale, âJust tell me it wasnât you. Thatâs all there is to say."
He stares at you. Thereâs nothing there.
âTell me, Tom.â
Your breath catches on an automatic please but you donât want to offer him that.
âI cannot.â
Then make me forget, you want to scream. Let it be summer. Let us work for pennies and breadcrumbs and be no one together.
Itâs late winter and itâs too cold.
âYou killed her,â you say quietly.
âIf I told you I did not wish for it, would you even believe me?â
âWhat are you⌠so it was an accident?â
âThere was â an opportunity presented itself that may never have come again; that does not mean I donât find the nature of it regrettable.â
âRegrettable.â Youâre laughing or crying or both, and you must look unwell. Halfway out of your mind.
Heâs so composed in the face of it that it only makes you more incensed.
âYou told me to change things ââ
âYou killed someone! Can you understand that?â
âYou nearly died,â he hisses, âand if I am to apologise for recognizing it only as the first of many times, I will not. If I am to apologise for doing whatever is necessary to prevent it, I will not. The hand we were dealt will not be the hand we die to â so yes, I understand it. And one day so will you.â
âDon't," you spit, and your anger must look pathetic under your welling tears. âDon't you dare tell me that this was for me.â
âDo you want me to lie?â
âWhat could her death possibly bring me, Tom?â
âHer death is the first step to ââ
âGod, stop dancing around the fucking question!â Both hands have wound their way to your head, clutching at your skull like the brain matter might spill through one of the cracks heâs wearing down. âJust⌠tell me.â
âYou recall Godelot's work," he says stiffly. The question of it takes you by surprise, peels the moment back like the rim of a fruit and you're left uncertain.
All you can do is nod, arms falling to cross over your chest.
âThere was one form of magic he refused quite concisely to impart. I searched the Restricted Section for days, and under Dumbledore's watch that was not an easy thing to do."
You stole from him, you're urged to remind him, but it's something you'd say with a nudge of annoyance and a roll of your eyes. Such admonishment is small and far away.
âI found it at last in one of the repositories," he goes on, âSecrets of the Darkest Art."
â...What?"
âIt's called a Horcrux,â he says. âMurder, by nature, splits the soul. The Horcrux simply makes use of the act; puts the soul fragment into something imperishable so that it is protected, rather than abandoned. In turn, your life cannot be taken. By malady, by magic, by sword â the vessel is destroyed but the soul lives on.â
You blink, feeling dizzy. âMyrtle was the sacrifice.â
âMyrtle was there,â Tom remedies.
âHow lucky for you.â
âThe circumstances could be ameliorated if one were to be made for you. I would have preferred it be someone who deserves it.â
âFor â youâd do it again? Again, Tom?â
His brows crease, and even his upset seems contrived. Thereâs this barricade heâs placed that you, in all your infallible knowing of him, cannot puncture. Itâs agony to begin to question what he could possibly be keeping from you in a confession like this.
âYou killed someone, Tom. You â I would never ask you to do that. I would never live at the cost of someone else."
âNo, you would not,â he agrees, though he shakes his head like itâs incredulous of you. âDo you think, even if I knew it were certain, a summons from the Ministry would have stopped me from saving you this summer? Do you suppose the threat of punishment would cause me to waver at that moment? I know it would not hinder you. So, you have your lines and I have mine â you never needed to ask.â
And now it hurts. The emptiness clears and you can't stand yourself for crying, but you do. It comes out in ragged, breathless sobs, clasped behind your palm as you turn away from him.Â
You've loved him since you were eleven. It's always been you two â it was always supposed to be you two. What is there to say to him? He's blurring in your periphery like in the midst of your sickness, and there's nothing he can do to heal you this time. Your vision will clear and Myrtle Warren will still be dead. He'll still be a stranger in the face of the boy you love.Â
âWhy," you whine, a wet, hollow stain in your voice you've never cried enough to hear before. âMyrtle was â wasn't â uh â" You swallow, hysterics severing your words. You can't really think right now. Your body wobbles and your head feels puffy and hot. This might be shock.Â
Tom scowls like it irritates him to watch you push yourself, like this is just the unfortunate effect of you depleting your energy in a duel, not eating correctly, treating yourself carelessly.Â
Of course you can't stand or talk or think. You're you, contemplating a life without him.
âSit," he says in frustration. You smack his hand away when he reaches for you, but the world has turned a shade darker and you're slipping into it.Â
He tugs a chair towards you with a silent charge and a reprimand, and your body doesnât possess the wherewithal not to collapse into it the second itâs under you.
After a moment you can speak again, shaking hands steadied by your knees. âDid you⌠did you think I wouldn't find out? You know, the only thing that can petrify someone besides a serpent is a Gorgon. And â where would Rubeus Hagrid have found one of those?"
âI thought I would have time.â
âTo come up with a good lie? Something Iâd sympathise with?â
He bites his cheek. âEvidently the particulars matter little to you.â
Fuck him. âFuck you.â
âVery cogent.â
âNo, fuck you, Tom. We could have â we only had a year left and then we could â we could've done anything we wanted." You're crying again. You don't have the energy to be embarrassed. âAnd you chose this."
Heâs indignant as he steps closer. âWith what money? For what life? We are better than all of them and itâs never mattered. It never will; you know that. You told me that. Youâre angry now, but you must know the truth of it. I would not forsake you. I would not lose you.â
You blink up at him, mouth stuck with some cottony feeling and cheeks stiff from crying.
âYou have lost me, Tom."
He stills as if suspended. Some maceration must follow but it doesnât.
You stand on weak legs to look him in the eyes. You wonder if he can see the love in yours. You wonder if he knows you will walk away despite it. (Of course he does. Youâve never lied to him.)Â
You think about how his fingers seem to always find their way to your cheek and you put yours to his. The bone there is sharp, but the skin is soft. Boyish.Â
There isn't a word for a goodbye like this. It shouldn't exist and so it doesn't. You just leave.
You fail your N.E.W.T courses. Quite spectacularly.
Mari sits beside you on the train with a soothing hand on your shoulder, and doesnât ask whatâs rendered you into a comatose husk since March. Thereâs no crying. You chew numbly on soft caramels from the trolley and stare out the window onto the hills.
That summer is spent in your bedroom unless youâre forced elsewhere. A new girl with skin so white itâs nearly translucent sleeps in the bed beside yours, taking meals on trays like you did in your first days here, tracing the cracks in the tiles, humming to herself in the dark. She makes you feel less pathetic for doing much the same.Â
Youâd been right in your assumption that there would be more dead upon your return, and wrong that there would be more empty rooms. There are always more orphans being made.
And then you receive a letter. It isnât delivered by owl (only for secrecy, you assume, because there are no muggles whoâd be writing to you) but itâs stamped with a vaguely familiar crest. Not Hogwartsâ waxen seal, but something undoubtedly magical. A cockroach and a cup, you think, squinting. Transfiguration.
You tear the envelope open and pull the letter out.
Itâs from Dumbledore. Some of it melds together, but the key words stand out.
Spoken to Dippet⌠Exceptional promise⌠N.E.W.Ts⌠May be reconsidered⌠Upon dispensation⌠Be well.
Be well.
You are not. You are something half-drowned and half-burned, never enough of one to quell the effects of the other. Sunlight is sparse through your side of the orphanage. On the radio, they warn a pattern of one bomb every second hour. The only other warning is the sound when they fly overhead, and if you canât run fast enough â
You write your answer in a crowded tube station with a spotty ballpoint pen. Tom is there, looking between you, the dust, and your shaking hands as if to say: tell me I was wrong.
Some of your letter melds together but the key words stand out.
Thank you, Sir. Whatever you need.
Itâs a shock that you live to seventh year. Itâs a shock that you do it without him â though he watches, and in his gaze you feel regressed. Youâre alive, yes, but thereâs something there⌠his dead weight, death-grip; his haunting. They always speak of the dead as something heavy. Something that holds onto you even after itâs gone.
You find that to be true.
Dippetâs condition that you remain in Dumbledoreâs N.E.W.T class is that you achieve more than the standard requirement. Essentially, your final exam will be much harder than everyone else's: Human Transfiguration, mastery of petty Transformation (through the means of Wizardâs Chess pieces), Conjuration and Vanishment of various delicate objects â all done nonverbally.
Even Dumbledore seems sceptical, but it translates to more rigorous practise rather than resignation, assignments he doesnât even task to Mari, though sheâs just as good, and you canât begin to understand why he cares so much.Â
âIâll entrust you with these while Iâm away,â he says before Christmas break, sliding a sheet of parchment your way with a flick of his wand.
You frown, unfolding it. His instructions are always short now â youâve learned to decode his meaning well enough without much exposition.Â
Teacup to gerbil â to cat, and inverse.
Inanimatus Conjurus spell (cockroach and cup, as instructed) to be Vanished when perfected.
Study Antarâs Doctrine. Miss Wright will act as your partner.
Due February.
Itâs far too much to be done in that time. âSir?â
Dumbledore lugs a messenger bag over his shoulder that appears small, but he carries it in such a way you suspect itâs magically extended. He smiles wistfully, pushing his spectacles up the bridge of his nose. âYou know, I often regret how much this war asks of me. A consequence of my own doing.â
Right â Grindelwald. Sometimes you forget between awaiting the next muggle paper. War is everywhere.
You nod. âI hope⌠Good luck, Sir.â
Another half-smile as he twists open a jar of Floo Powder, and then he shakes his head with something you almost decipher as amusement. A brittle sort. Tired. âGood luck to you.â
And then heâs gone, in a swath of green flames that do nothing to inspire any desire for Floo travel in you.
Antarâs Doctrine is simultaneously prosaic and grandiose. They read like excerpts of a journal and you yawn into them over your morning tea, stirring amongst the first-years, who are the only people at the Slytherin table you can stand to sit with. Your blood status is apparently nullified by your age, and the worst they do is look at you funny. You arenât sure what Abraxasâs â Tomâs (the new hierarchy never fails to stagger you) â lackeys would do if you sat with the other seventh-years instead. A part of you longs to know. They certainly donât bother you in class the way they used to, you arenât tripped in the corridors, but you wonder how far Tomâs influence can stretch. He is the Heir of Slytherin, and heâs earned them. But you are nothing.
Youâd like it if he would let them hurt you. You think the incentive would be enough to hurt him back. And God â God, you want to. You want to hurt him almost as much as you want him.
You practise through the doctrine with Mari, as Dumbledore directed. When youâre able to sever Antarâs egotism from his abilities, you can see why Dumbledore would recommend his book to you. It feels like slipping through a crack in glass without shattering the whole thing. You weave in and back out, and Mari grins when she returns from the shape of a teapot to her body without you needing to utter a word to do it.
In the back of your mind, youâre aware what youâre doing is nearly unprecedented. Itâs spring, youâre months away from eighteen, muggle-born, and mastering nonverbal Human Transfiguration like itâs a Softening Charm. Mari tells you youâre the smartest person sheâs ever met. It makes your cheeks go hot to hear such open praise, worse when you snap out of the thought that you believe her.
Grindelwald falls. The school celebrates in whispers until the evidence is in front of them â Dumbledore, returned without a scar, a new wand in his hand â and then theyâre cheers. The feast that night is a great one, and he toasts to you from the end of the staff table, a discreet tilt of his cup before he takes a sip and returns to converse with Professor Merrythought.
You take from your own, and your eyes land on Tom, spine of his goblet tight in his hand. Heâs looking at you like youâve affronted him somehow. You could laugh â by choosing Dumbledore. Of course. As if it was a choice at all.
But if it bothers him⌠if it feels anything at all like the betrayal you felt, then â good.
You drink, and donât look away.
By the time your N.E.W.T.s arrive you have a renewed confidence that youâll succeed, even with the obstacle of performing each exam wordlessly.
There are only twelve students who came out of your sixth year class, so to divide resources for the tests is no grand task. Youâre given a Wizardâs Chess set, a desk with assorted vases and goblets, an intricate epergne (you had to whisper to Mari to learn its name), and a Ministry worker borrowed like some laboratory mouse. You suppose it makes sense, though â youâre all capable enough of Human Transfiguration not to mutilate anyone, and performing on a classmate could obfuscate the results. Itâs far easier to Transfigure someone you know than someone you donât.
You start with the chess set, Dumbledore and the Ministry worker observing you as you turn pawns to knights and rooks to kings, the minutiae of the pieces drawing sweat to your brow. They change, and change, and change, and you donât mutter an incantation once. The Ministry worker puts the set away and directs you to the glass. You Switch the vases with the goblets, Vanish them, and Conjure them again. The Ministry worker takes notes. Dumbledore nods affirmatively at you and you can exhale. The epergne is the hardest; so kitschy and elaborate you donât know where to start when youâre tasked to Transform it into an animal.Â
An animal â like that isnât the vaguest instruction youâve ever received.
You look at it on the desk, mirrors and glass and gold on protracted arms, and you go for the first thing you think of because the Ministry worker is staring at you like youâre inept and you see it in his eyes â this is the muggle-born one, this one canât do it.Â
Youâre better than them. You can do it forever.
The epergne spins at the dip of your wand, and emerges more than an animal. A big glass tank appears in its place, round and gold-rimmed, water lapping at the sides. Inside it is a jellyfish. Emerald green, bobbing, tentacles and oral arms coiling against the glass like the limbs of the epergne had spanned its centre.
The Ministry worker swallows. Dumbledore smiles.
âAnd â and back?â the worker says, like that will be the thing that stops you.
You point again, mouth tight with irritation, and reverse the Transformation. A droplet of water smacks your face and youâre lucky to be so hot you can disguise it as sweat. You suspect even an error that small would cost you a mark.
You wipe it away. A strange thing happens; you imagine Tom brushing the water from your cheek at the Black Lake. You imagine his fingers in the rain.
The Ministry worker steps closer with a shameless frown. He tells you to turn his hair red. You do. He regards himself in the mirror and scribbles something down. He tells you to turn it back. You do. To grow him a beard, to change his clothes, to make him taller, shorter, this and that â all read from a list he does not appear enthused to recite. You do it all.
He shakes Dumbledoreâs hand when itâs done, duplicates his notes for him to keep, and follows the other Ministry workers through the fireplace when everyoneâs exams are finished.
You find out youâve passed with an Outstanding on your birthday.
Mari drags you to the Three Broomsticks to celebrate, butterbeers on her. (They always are.)
âCanât believe weâre about to graduate,â she says into her cup, froth on her upper lip.
You sigh into your own, partially giddy and mostly nervous.
Mari squeezes your face between her thumb and finger so your frown is puckered. âChin up, genius. Youâll be excellent.â
You push her hand away but canât help a small smile. âOutstanding,â you correct.
âOutstanding!â She bursts out laughing. âBloody ego on you nowâŚâ
âWell, I am the smartest person you know.â
âI take that back.â
She pushes out of her chair with a slightly inebriated wobble. âGoing to the loo. Donât touch my chips.â
Your hands raise in surrender, and you steal only one when sheâs gone.
You arenât the only ones here to celebrate. (Your birthday and your mutual achievement, yes, but the Three Broomsticks is filled wall-to-wall with seventh years drinking their final nights at school away.) Thereâs music charmed to reach every corner, even yours at the little alcove hidden from plain sight. Itâs nice to watch from here â the stumbling, the kisses meant for mouths that land drunkenly on cheeks and noses, the barkeeps that roll their eyes as soon as they turn away from all the newly adult customers, not yet learned or careless in their drinking manners.
It is not nice to be occluded from plain sight in such a way that you donât notice Tom Riddle until heâs inches away from your table. It is not nice that no one else notices either.
On instinct you donât make any impressive exit. He slides into the booth next to you and your brain short circuits for a moment at the warm familiarity of his presence beside you. Then it occurs that itâs been more than a year since this was remotely commonplace â that you cannot forget the reason why.
Thereâs not much time to decide whether you want to be vicious or indifferent or to debate on past precedent which would bother him more. You havenât attacked him despite being concealed enough to do it unnoticed, and you havenât shoved furiously out of the other side of the booth.
Indifferent it is.Â
âCan I help you?â
âYouâre causing quite the stir,â he says, taking one of Mariâs chips.
Youâre allowed. Itâs infuriating when he does it.
âAm I?â
âItâs enough to fail a N.E.W.T level class and be expressly petitioned back, but to have a special criteria set for your exams and manage an O on top of it allâŚâ He inclines his head as if to appreciate your face so close after so long. You should not let him. âYou are incomprehensible. It terrifies them.â
âTheyâre afraid of the wrong mudblood, then, arenât they?â
Indifference effaced. Youâre angry.
He seems to have come prepared, and shrugs your scorn off like a scarf you would have forced him to wear winters ago. âOf course, they have no reason to suspect Dumbledore might have ulterior motives.â
Ulterior â you certainly hope he isnât suggesting this is based on anything but your merit, but then â you couldnât begin to understand why Dumbledore cared so much, could you? Youâd made brief inspections of his disdain for Tom in second year, his waning shades of kindness and the matter of his stolen encyclopaedia, but you hadnât⌠you hadnât thought at all about how his dedication to your progress only begun after youâd stopped sharing a class with Tom, how it had developed as you began to drift from one another in fifth year and accelerated in sixth after the first petrification and Myrtleâs death. How Tom had worn you down with a weighted glare at Dumbledoreâs little toast.
It wasnât because you had chosen Dumbledore, you realise. It was because Dumbledore had chosen you.
âWhy donât you worry about your pets, Riddle?â you snarl, âIâm sure there are bigger problems with your lot than my exam results.â
Something in his face shifts at the name. You swell with distorted pride.
He mends the reaction by looking you over in more detail, his features schooled into something he must know you canât deduce. You try not to squirm under the intensity of it.
He reaches almost mindlessly for your collar (there is nothing mindless about it, youâre sure) and smooths the fabric gently with his fingers. âI always liked you in this colour.â
You blink. His thumb just barely brushes against the skin of your neck before retreating, and your mouth falls open.
âDonât do that,â you say. Truly a sad attempt. Your repulsion is more with yourself than him, and thatâs not at all right.
Where is Mari?
âYour friend was at the bar, last I saw her.â
You stare at him with wild eyes. How the hell â ?
âYou were always easy to read,â he supplies, and leans in so you can follow his line of sight to the tiniest sliver of the bar visible between two columns, where Mari looks deeply engaged in conversation with Leo Ndiaye, one of the Gryffindor Chasers.
You take a sharp, exasperated breath at her antics. She might be more in love with the competition than the boy himself. Theyâd never last without Quidditch to bind them, but you canât fault her for wanting a bit of fun.
âWell then ââÂ
Right. Tom hasnât actually moved away. You turn and his face is just there.
His eyes dart forthwith to your mouth, and â no. No, he wonât be doing that and neither will you.
â...Iâm off to bed.â Stop talking to him like heâs your friend, you think miserably. Stop looking at him like heâs your â
âThat would be wise.â
Heâs still looking at your lips.
No one else is looking at you at all.
It could exist in just this moment, you deliberate; separate from everything else.
Except nothing about Tom exists in its own moment. Heâs all over you all the time, skin and bone and soul. You hope you still have a place in the broken fragments of his.
âSo Iâll be going now,â you say again.
âI havenât protested.â
But heâs leaning in, and he has to know thatâs impedance enough.
âBut you will.â
His lips touch yours. âYes, I will.â
You grab him by his shirt and youâre kissing him. Youâre kissing each other like either of you know what the hell it means to kiss anyone, but youâve learned the rest together, havenât you? Your noses bump and you donât care. You just need to kiss him, and â God, you make some noise against his mouth and the hand cupping your face spreads to capture more of you, greedy and wayward â he needs to kiss you too. Itâs a horrible thing to know. It leads you to pose too many questions.
The need must have begun as want, and when did the want begin? How long has he looked at you and wondered what youâd feel like to kiss, touch, mark? (Heâll never have the latter. You swear that.)
Youâre pulling away in intervals. âYou donât have me, you know.â
âI know,â he responds, lips on the corner of yours.
âYou still lost me.â
âI know.â
âI hate you.â
He pauses for a moment. âI know.â
You kiss him again. Long and soft, memorising his cupidâs bow and the tip of his tongue, and when one of his hands moves to your waist you part from him like youâve been burned.
âI ââ You resist the urge to touch a finger to your lips, standing abruptly from the table and adjusting your shirt. Your body feels like an evolutionarily faulty vessel, too easy to please, though you canât imagine it responding to anyone else this way. Or perhaps your mind is the problem. Not wired well enough to resist an evidently bad thing. âGoodnight, Tom.â
You thought there wasnât a word for your goodbye, but thatâs it. So simple it sinks you. Goodnight, Tom. Iâll dream of a morning where I wake up beside you, but you wonât be there.
He grabs your hand before you can go, licking his lips and it haunts you to think heâs savouring you. It stings a place deep in your chest youâd spent all year trying to heal.
âMy door is always open,â he says.
He lets you go.
You graduate with Mariâs hand in yours, and you arenât afraid.
Dumbledore requests that you stay for the summer to help him prepare for the first yearâs curriculum in the fall. Itâs a ridiculous opportunity for someone your age â free lodgings and a stellar impression on your resume, and â you can only accept it with an ire you havenât felt since the spread of influenza in muggle Britain.
If heâs offering you lodgings now, he could have done it all along.
It sends you down a horrible train of thought while you move your things from the Slytherin dormitories to a little chamber a few doors down from the staff room; Tom will be removed from Woolâs this year. Will he stay at Malfoy Manor? But Tom is still publicly muggle-born â Abraxasâs parents would never allow it. Will he find a job, a flat? Will he swindle muggles once he turns eighteen and the Trace is no longer an obstruction?
You think of him often. You think of his offer.
My door is always open.
Plenty of doors are open to you now. Why should you want to go back to his?
Still, the Second World War ends in November and you feel like you can breathe at a depth you never could before. The school doesnât celebrate like it did with Grindelwald. No one but you seems to care at all.
Itâs a tempting door.
The year passes in a blur of graded papers and lessons Dumbledore sometimes involves you in and sometimes does not. Most of the first-years care little for you, but there are two Slytherin muggle-borns who look at you like a new sun to orbit. Everything is worth it for that.
You see Mari when you can, and find sheâs training with the Italian Quidditch team, who apparently are smart enough to care more about skill than blood. She says she misses the complexities of Transfiguration, but any career in it was always going to be yours. Smartest person she knows, she reiterates. Biggest ego too.
The next summer Dumbledore informs you of a posting at the Ministry. Something small with a smaller wage. He emphasises the weight of his personal recommendation, but that you wonât be respected unless you claw tooth and nail for it. You donât take long to consider a chance to make an actual income with an actual career doing something muggle-borns simply donât do before youâre nodding assuredly and asking him what you need.
Better clothes are first, and all you can afford until further notice. You take to Gladrags with intent to purchase for the first time in your five years of wandering in the shop with eyes bigger than your wallet, and the owner looks at you with distrust when you slide her your sickles.
The Ministry job is truly, infinitesimally, insignificant.Â
Itâs far down in the Department of Magical Accidents and Catastrophes. Youâre a glorified secretary, and you recall the few times youâd worked as a mail-sorter during the war. Itâs some sick irony that youâve landed yourself in a pile of paper once more.
But the money, though offensively scant to someone with better options (and itâs infuriating the options you deserve), is more than youâve ever had, and within the next year youâre able to leave the castle and take a cheap room at an inn in Hogsmeade. Youâre close enough to Dumbledore to aid him when he needs you, but far enough to feel like your school days are departed, and you need not worry about memories lurching unexpectedly at every corridor.Â
A sick part of you still reaches for your mouth sometimes to remember what it felt like to be kissed. That part of you wishes for Tom. You could kiss him into oblivion. You could find a way to make it hurt him back.
My door is always open.
Then youâll slam it bloody closed.
Mari invites you to her first professional game and you cheer for her in the stands, a green, white, and red scarf around your neck in place of her old blue.
She wins and you get drinks in a muggle pub. You kiss a man at the bar. You go home with him. His hair is dark, but not dark enough. His lips are soft, but the shape is wrong. He makes you feel good, but you wonder if in another life, the dream is true; you roll over in the morning to Tom beside you, and he makes you feel better.
When you can find time between the monotonous demands of your job, youâre in the Transfiguration classroom, staying behind to help the Slytherin muggle-borns with their Switching spells.
Itâs one stupid accident the next fall that changes things.
A muggle bank has been robbed, and whatever idiotic, panicked witch or wizard was behind it apparently found themselves incapable of getting the deed done with a simple Imperius Curse (you canât imagine, based on the scene, that theyâre above Unforgivables), and somehow ended up leaving the building half-charred and teeming with at least six bank tellers Transformed into birds, two chirping into the floor tiles with broken wings.
âRenauldâs on it, though,â your coworker says when the news finds your department.
âRenauld?â
Heâs a year older than you, a pureblood with parents in high places, and endlessly fucking hopeless.
âWell, yeah ââ
You push out from your desk, files fluttering behind you. âRenauld will expose the whole damn wizarding world if he touches that building.â
âBut McCormack sent him.â
âWhere is it?â
âI⌠McCormack said that ââ
âWhere is it, Flack?â
âUm. Um, near King William, I think. Moorgate or, um ââ
Thatâs good enough. You toss the Floo Powder into the fireplace and go.
The place is a mess. You donât even have to look for it. Thereâs some ward around the street, bouncing muggles away like an invisible end to a map they donât even register is there. At least thatâs handled right.
But you slip through it and curse under your breath at the muggles trapped inside the wards. Theyâre like fish prodding at the dome of their bowl, and some run up to you demanding explanations when they see you unaffected by it. You brush them off â Obliviation is not your strong-suit â though you do shout at a pair of DMAC wizards uselessly standing guard outside the bank.
âWhat the hell are you doing?â you ask on approach. âRenauldâs supposed to handle the inside, yeah? You deal with fixing them.â
You point toward the frantic muggles, and the officials just regard you with vague confusion at your presence. âRenauld said ââ
âOh my God! Fix. The muggles.â
You afford nothing else before pushing past them to enter the bank.
Itâs quite impressive, actually; Renauld, the result of generations of foolproof breeding, is waving his wand around like heâs just stepped out of Olivanders for the first time.
âHeal their wings,â you say without greeting.
Renauld jumps. âWhat? What are you doing here?â
âHeal their damn wings. Theyâre easier than human limbs and healing magicâs the only thing you arenât completely shit at.â
âWho authorised you?â he hisses.
âI did.â
In hindsight, it should have gone horrifically wrong. Your wand could have been taken and your life might have been over in all ways that matter, flung back into the muggle world where youâve always been told you belong.
But Renauld vouches for you. You Transform the walls, you fix the burns, you mend the bank to something presentable. A muggle robbery â dangerous, financially tragic, but believable. And your suggestion to heal the injured bank tellers in their animal forms might be the thing that saved them. When Renauld mends their wings and regenerates their blood, you Untransfigure them, and the other DMAC officials alter their memories with haste.
You were completely out of line and utterly right.
It isnât something people like you are allotted.
Your probation period is dreadful. You hide in your room at the inn most days, Vanishing little stained panes on your window to feel the warm breeze of air before you Conjure them again. You help grade papers, though Dumbledore is displeased with you and the night is a silent one. He assures you curtly that heâs doing his best with the Ministry to amend this.
And⌠he does.
With Renauldâs help and the corroboration of the other DMAC officials, youâre back at work by the start of the school year.
Itâs a slow process â almost eight months of meaningless paperwork â before the next incident occurs and youâre hectically ushered to the scene like a belated understudy. And then it happens again. And again. And again.
Thereâs really no choice but to promote you.
Your heroics are torn from a Gryffindor cloth, so says Flack. You urge him never to say such a thing again.
By your twenty-first birthday, you think about Tom almost exclusively in your sleep. Youâre much too busy to think about him anywhere else.
The summer is warm and Hogsmeade is lively. Youâve vacated your room at the inn for a little house on the outskirts of the village, decorating it how you like â discovering what you like. Youâd never had a chance to find out before.
Mari visits when she can once you have your fireplace connected to the Floo Network (you yourself prefer Apparating) but her name is slowly working its way from the Italian papers to the British ones, and she has so much to tell you there isnât possibly enough time in her days to tell it. Thereâs also the matter of Leo Ndiaye, who has, recently, gotten on one knee and proposed to her. If there had been a bet on them ending up together, you would have been out enough galleons to put you in debt.
After especially gruesome days at work, you and a few colleagues make a habit of getting sherries at the Sirenâs Tail, complaining that sometimes the nature of your work is akin to an aurorâs but without the notoriety and pay.
âOh, please,â says Emilia Alves, twirling her straw, âhave you seen the shit the aurors are up to lately? Iâd rather be a blimminâ Unspeakable.â
âYouâd have to be able to keep your mouth shut for that, Alves.â
Emilia punches Renauld in the arm.
âWhat are the aurors up to?â Flack asks.
âI dunno much. There was a murder all the way in Albania, sâposedly. Reeked of dark magic.â
âNothing new,â you join, and then frown. âWhyâs our Ministry dealing with it though?â
âI dunno. I got word from Hillicker that the Albanians didnât know what to make of the mess. Theyâve never seen anything like it.â
âHillickerâs not a source,â Renauld scoffs.
âYeah? Why donât you ask your daddy for something better?â
âAlves, Iâll have you know ââ
You lean in over the counter. âWhat do you mean theyâve never seen anything like it?â
She grins. âWhy? Storming a bank robbery wasnât exciting enough for you?â
You roll your eyes, taking a drink.
That ought to be the end of it. One extraordinarily lucky incident to push you up the career ladder was rare enough â there is absolutely no way digging around a case that has nothing to do with you or your department could ever end well.
But something about it itches.
You make nice with Hillicker. Sheâs a year younger than you and far too kind for her own good, and she gushes freely about her husbandâs work as an auror (they must be a perfect match for him to gush freely about it with her). Itâs a bit manipulative. You have no excellent excuse for it, but⌠ambition, and all that, you suppose. Flackâs Gryffindor theory is studded with holes.
You are green, through and through.
Emiliaâs updates are meaningless when you garner so much information that youâve already heard everything she has to say over drinks, and at this point her and Hillicker might be a step behind you. Emilia still only knows about Albania; peppery little details of half a story. Hillicker discusses an assortment of murders with no real string between them, and Dumbledore regards you with cool heeding when you bring up the matter with him.
You see him little nowadays but youâve never been close in any true sense, traces of resentment budding over the years like rainwater collects on glass until the stream finally slips.
You visit Hogwarts mostly for your Slytherins, fourteen or fifteen now, unafraid of the distinction of their blood.
And then thereâs one night after you turn twenty-two where drinks take place at yours for a change, Mari and Leo included and happily wed. You have no sherries but your ale is just as well, and itâs only you and Renauld who are sober by the time everyone else is vanishing into the fireplace and going home.
That makes it much worse when you sleep together.Â
Thereâs no excuse of having had a glass too many â so sorry, Iâll be on my way then, and him stumbling over his trousers to get out of your hair. Of course, he does that anyway, scratching the nape of his neck when he reaches your doorway in the morning.
âThanks for the â well, you have a nice home â I do think I should ââ
âYes.â
âRight.â
âOh!â He turns around at the last second. âEr â I know youâve become a tad obsessed with⌠Hillicker mentioned another, anyway. Hepzibah something. Killed by her own elf, the aurors suspect.â
âOh,â you echo, sheets pulled up to your shoulders. âThanks, Renauld.â
âI thought you might like to know. Donât be daft about it.â
Youâre incredibly daft about it.
Thereâs something reminiscent about Albania in this case that wasnât there with the others. The tide of dark magic ebbing across the scene, the cherry-picked information released in the Prophet, the claim of an old, dumb House Elf who poisoned her mistress like the Albanian peasant killed in some insoluble accident.Â
The itch exacerbates.
You see him in your dreams again. He peers over Runes in a stolen encyclopaedia, he whispers to an adder on his shoulder, he kisses the corner of your mouth and it isnât enough. He kills you, again and again. You kill him too.
You wake up and he isnât there.
Itâs a new low when youâre invited to the Hillickerâs anniversary dinner and you end up digging through the drawers of their study halfway through the night.
The Albania file offers nearly nothing. There was the charred residue of dark magic imprinted on a hollow tree in the fields of the peasantâs hamlet, but nothing detailing more than a blank imprint of the Killing Curse in his eyes. Still, you tuck the knowledge away for the file of one Hebzibah Smith, whose tea did indeed have traces of poison, but whose den was also ripe with a layer of darkness that didnât line up with the Ministryâs tale of senile elf.
And then thereâs the forgotten matter of her being a purveyor of ancestral artefacts. The file doesnât recount whether any are missing, since the woman was wise enough not to proclaim all her possessions to the world, but itâs something. A scratch.
You travel to Albania that Christmas. The neighbours in the peasantâs hamlet have skewed memories, so they provide little help, but the manâs house was left almost untouched.
You tear the place apart and Transfigure it back together when youâre done.
All you find, in the end, is a scrap of an old envelope in a suitcase.
R.R
It could be that itâs old. The cursive seems ancient enough. But you swear the letters have the distinct shape of quill ink â too artful for any pen â and maybe that wouldnât matter if it werenât for half a wax seal stuck to the torn edge of the envelope. Stained but silver, the barest hint of two ribbons, a crest, and the letter H.
You return to Hogwarts posthaste.
Itâs snowing in the courtyards and you waddle with a duotang under one arm to pretend youâre here for something scholarly, an array of excuses prepared in case you run into Dumbledore, but you donât.
The Grey Lady is as beautiful as sheâs rumoured to be.Â
You ask her about her mother, and sheâs silent, an expression on her face like youâve struck her.
âIs it found?â she whispers. The snow floats through her.
Your heart hammers as you consider how to approach this. She thinks you know more than you do, which means thereâs something to know.
âYes,â you say. And you dare further with the context you know, âIn Albania.â
âOh,â she hums. âOhâŚâ
And if she means to say more she doesnât seem able, washing away through the balusters, then the walls. You think of your house ghost and what he did to her, and you feel sorry for a second.
Madam Palles expels you from the library the moment you find what youâre looking for, and you rush past a throng of staring students to the staff room fireplace. Itâs too far a walk to the border of the castle wards to Apparate. You bite back the preemptive sickness, get swallowed by the flames, and go home.
There are blanks to fill in but you do it easily. Rowena Ravenclawâs diadem. Hepzibah Smith and her assortment of unregistered artefacts. The stain of dark magic. Something so rare not even the aurors recognized it.
But you do, because he told you.
You wonder on your search to find him what object he used when he killed Myrtle Warren. Nothing special, you think â maybe even the closest thing he could find. These murders involved more preparation. He got to mark them however he wanted.
Itâs almost disappointing to find him here. In a little flat over Knockturn Alley with a view of charmed coalsmoke and the brick wall of another shop.Â
Itâs as tidy as his room at Woolâs, the only dirt the irremediable age of the building itself. The whole place looks almost slanted, large enough only for the bare necessities; a kitchen, a toilet, a bedroom that looks more like a closet, and a study/dining room/den you canât imagine he hosts many gatherings in. You rescind the mere thought. Whatever gatherings Tom Riddle is having these days, youâre sure you canât begin to imagine at all.
You wait, legs crossed on an old loveseat, fiddling with your wand.
The door clicks open when the snow has turned to hail and thereâs no light but the few scattered candles youâd lit on the mantelpiece.Â
It strikes you only when heâs standing before you that itâs his birthday.
Youâre in Tom Riddleâs flat, on his birthday, adorned by the orange glow of half-melted candles, and you know everything.
He eyes you carefully, a hint of surprise at the sight of you after four years that even he needs a second to recover from. And then he's even, inscrutable Riddle again, and you dare to think, come back.
âI placed wards," he says, hanging his bag on a rack by the wall.
âI thought your door was always open.â
You see his posture change from just his silhouette.
âWards never work in Knockturn,â you offer additionally, ânot really. There's too much conflicting magic; one border cuts into another; leaves a little sliver behind if youâre smart enough to find it. You should know that."Â
He turns to you. You take in a moment to acknowledge how he's changed. It's hard to see in the curtained moonlight, and it seems unreasonable to imagine heâs grown, but you think he has. An inch taller, perhaps. Two. Maybe the dress shoes. His arms are bigger under his button-down, but not enough to consider him muscular. His black hair isn't as perfect as you remember, and you suspect a long day of work undoes his curls. You always liked him better that way in school, after a night duel at the Black Lake, his robes askew and his hair a mess. Evidence that you were the only one to dishevel him. Now you were â what? Did he even think of you anymore? Yes. You'd always think of each other.
âDuly noted. What are you here for?â He tries your surname like a foreign language.
You cross your arms, and you're acutely aware that he's observing your changes too. You're not the matchstick witch he once knew. Your emotions are cultured now, taut to mirror his. You wear dull, formal grey, and that glowing green tinge that should be gleaming on you is under a thick carapace. Thatâs for Mari, Flack, Emilia â even Renauld. Not for Tom.
You wonder if he knows it was Dumbledore who put in the word that got you this uniform. You wonder if he resents you for it.
âThereâs been talk at the Ministry," you say finally, âA string of murders. Whispers of something â some dark magic they donât understand. And you know they're careful about things like that after Grindelwald."
âA string of murders... Hm. That might imply you understand a connective thread. Is there some sort of accusation being made?â
âOh, I'm sure you'd be flattered by accusations. Thereâs not enough there, as it stands. Just whispers." You sink more comfortably in the seat and the springs make a concerning sound. âBut I know you."
His hard, sharp gaze falters for a moment. You watch the flames dance behind him, the firelight playing against the lines of his shoulders, and feel your heart skip a beat. âWho else is speculating?"
âNo one." Your fingers brush over the book spines on the coffee table. âI guess their attention hasn't been drawn to a book clerk yet, even if you have taken residency... here." You say it with no shortage of disapproval.Â
Knockturn was never where Tom belonged. You'd once imagined a flat together in muggle London, taking the telephone booth to the Ministry together, changing the world together. It's a wish that's a lifetime away now.
âIs this a warning? I assure you, I donât need the condescension.â
âI'm not warning you," you scoff, âI â I'm seeing you. God knows I'll probably never get the chance to do that again once you get yourself locked up in Azkaban, which you will."Â
You sound exasperated. You sound half-pleading. âWhat are you doing, Tom? Is this â this is really what you want?"
âYes."
You shake your head. âI don't believe that." And then some of that fiery spit returns to you, and you feel like a child again, stuck in the London tube stations holding his hand at every plane that flew overhead, scowling that you needed his reassurance. Scowling that you were afraid.
âWell, your conjecture is ever-appreciated. Shall I lend you mine? Shall I congratulate you on your revolutionary position at the Ministry? Or is it Dumbledore I should afford my thanks?â
âI earned this,â you hiss.
âYou deserve it,â he amends. âBut do not lie to yourself and pretend thatâs why you have it.â
âFuck you.â
He smiles. âThere you are.â
âI donât need your congratulations, Riddle. Dumbledore doesnât need your damn thanks. But,â you say, biting back the snarl that wants out, âyou could thank me. After all, I could turn to the Ministry any minute with the truth of your heritage. I could tell them about Myrtle, the Horcrux â Horcruxes.â
The humour dissolves from his face and you despise the immense glee it brings you.
âOh, did you think I didnât know? Didnât understand the connective thread? You are sentimental under all that⌠fucking posturing, you know. Iâm sure itâs all very romantic to you â making Horcruxes out of Hogwarts artefacts. Shame itâs such an insult to your intelligence.â
âVery good,â he says after a long, terse silence. Youâre sure heâs thinking just the opposite.
You hum, meddling with your nails. âSo whatâs your plan?â
âIâd need a Vow for that.â
You laugh. âIâm not that desperate.â
âYouâre also not an auror, are you?â He tilts his head appraisingly. âAnd yet youâve found your way here.â
âHow many do you plan to make? How many people do you plan to kill?â
âA Vow.â
âAbsolutely not.â
âTea, then? Biscuits?â
âOh, I shouldnât. I read in the paper the other day about a poor old woman who had her tea poisoned.â
âHm. Terrible shame.â
Your fist clenches around your wand. âIs it paying off well, Riddle? It must be a good life if youâre willing to split your soul to hell and back to have more of it.â
He smiles at the barb in your words. âYou never were good with subtlety.â
âI wasnât trying to be subtle. This place is horrific.â
âI was referring to your inability to see more than whatâs directly in front of you.â
âOh, really? And what more should I see than a boy whoâs very good at getting weak men to bow and do very little else? Iâd try to see the bigger picture, but I reckon it wouldnât fit in here.â
Tom regards you colourlessly. You are slate, Ministry-grey, impermeable like palace portcullis.Â
âI suppose I should have killed you.â He says it with the nonchalance of a forgotten chore. He says it like youâre a stain.Â
He doesnât say it like he feels any terrible urgency to remove you; and you think, this time, youâd feel more powerful if he did. You think itâs far more debilitating to sit here and be looked at like he regrets wanting you alive more than he wants you dead.
âYes,â you concur, âI suppose you should have.âÂ
You place your wand down on the table and scoot your chair away for good measure. âItâs never too late to rectify your mistakes.â
Tom, for a moment, looks surprised. That makes you feel powerful. Youâd take more of that.
âYou have wandless magic,â he tries. A weak recovery.
âScoutâs honour, Riddle.â
He doesnât move for a moment, then fixes his wand in his hand and rises, doused in the same inscrutable calm that always used to drive you mad. Now something in you gleams with the knowledge that he only ever looks like this when heâs trying not to look like anything at all.
He steps closer and it gleams brighter. It trembles inside you and you know, distantly, that this is insane. Youâre weighing your life on a childhood trust that was shattered years ago, and you donât think youâve ever been that good at faith, but heâs approaching you and that gleam you feel is reflected in his eyes and you just⌠know. Your spilled blood once crawled with his. Thereâs no undoing that. Half of you is made of the other.
âI should have killed you,â he repeats.
Itâs a murmur. Stilted. Angry, even. Angry that you made him this and thereâs no fucking rectifying it â what a joke that is. What an immensely you thing to suggest.
âYes,â you agree.
Itâs a breath. Low. Proud, even. Proud that youâre his only mistake and heâs going to make it again.
Tom kisses you. Itâs a murder of its own kind. You kiss him back, and â you were always going to kill each other like this, werenât you? Itâs you and him whether you like it or not.
There should be no love in it. You know that. Love is far behind the both of you, stifled in a gasp at the back of your throat on your eighteenth birthday and the soft, selfish hands of a seventeen year old boy. This is mutual destruction. Spite and teeth and skin thatâs cold under your fingers.
He was your first in everything but this.
You push back at him and feel the hunger, the need in him, like a flame as he kisses you deeper and harder, and you find yourself losing yourself to it all over again, like you're back in the dark alcove of a pub where you told him goodbye, pushing to extend the juncture. And then he lets out a hitched, gravelly sound; not a moan but enough to make you shudder.
You pull him onto the sofa and crawl onto his lap.
âHow long?â he asks thickly.
You donât have to ask what he means. You bite against his neck, nails under his shirt as you struggle to pop the buttons open. There must be a violence in all your want for him because if there isn't it's just loss. It's just another thing you'll give him without taking anything back.Â
âSixth year," you pant, âin the Deathday ballroom when we fought for the first time. You â ah â you put your thumb on my mouth. Since then."
You hear a sharp intake of breath, and his hand moves up your back to pull you impossibly closer. His voice is ragged. âShould I tell you how long Iâve wanted you?"
You shudder a breath. âSince â" And it's a bit hard to talk with the way he's rolling your hips â âSince when?"
His lips twitch into a mirthless smile, hands spanning your thighs as you start to rock against him. âWhen you burned me, and I sent you into the lake."Â
You swallow, agonised by the slow pace his grip forces you to keep when all you want to do is go faster.Â
âYour uniform was terribly wet,â he says, mouth tracing your jaw. âDid I ever apologise for that?"
âN-no.â
He tuts, the hushed sound warm and deadly on your neck. âBad manners. I must have been distracted."
Oh. Oh, you think. It seems pointless to flush in the position you're in now, but the knowledge that he wanted you then and you hadn't even known is... all the more devastating.Â
But you shiver at the question of how heâd wanted you, in what amount of detail, in what precise way. You almost want to ask. See it for yourself.Â
You don't think you'd manage the words. Heâs hard underneath you and your head wants to lull toward his shoulder but a big hand holds you from one side of your jaw down the length of your neck, his tongue laving up the other. Instead youâre balanced only by his hands and his mouth, rolling against him because itâs all you can do like this.
Heâs marking you, you realise with a gasp, and your fingers bury in his hair to remove his mouth from its descending assault on your collar. Not that. Youâd sworn against that.
Your fingers return to his buttons and he copies you by finding yours, pulling at the fabric tucked into your trousers until itâs discarded entirely. You press your hands to the planes of his chest and watch him, your mouth agape as his eyes linger on your chest.
His heart is pounding and he must know youâre about to comment on it because his lips are on yours again and he adjusts his position and your fingers dig into his shoulders at the delicious new feeling of him pressing into your thigh.Â
You move for his belt. He moves for your zipper. Itâs some sort of race, whatever youâre doing, and youâre at an unfair advantage when youâre still fumbling with his buckle when his hand is already carving a slow path to the band of your underwear. You're scalding under the journey of it, little stars pricking you under every new inch he explores.
He dips in and your eyes wrench shut, grasping frantically for his wrist.
âShh,â he says softly, caressing your cheek with his spare hand, thumb finding your mouth how it did all those years ago and you want to curse him. The fucker knows exactly what heâs doing.
You shake your head, chest rising with heavy breaths as you return to his belt and scrabble to unbuckle it.
âSo tense,â he murmurs. The hand at your cheek draws over your lower lip before it falls to your back to hold you closer. âRest now.â
And his fingers trace you where you want him most, brushing past your clit as he pulls his face back to watch you.
You sink into the feeling, still swaying on his lap, a half-efforted attempt at finding friction in the hardness between his legs that feels fruitless because it won't be enough until he's inside. Your hand just grips onto the fabric of his unzipped trousers and stays there. Itâs a pause. An obstacle on your path to him that you need just a moment to recover from before youâll make him feel just like this. Better. Worse. Itâs hard to tell which is which.
Heâs stroking at you now, pleased by the way you lurch against him with every touch.
You have to recover, you have to make it even, you have to⌠youâŚ
A finger presses inside and you moan.
âYou came back to me,â he whispers, close enough to be kissing you but thereâs just the stutter of his breath. It's a fucking religious thing to say, the way he does it.
âDoesnât make me yours,â you breathe.
He shakes his head. âI know. Youâll still take it though, wonât you?â
Oh, fuck.
He makes a sound of approval. âGood.â
Good. Fine. Your hands slip from his zipper to the meat of his thighs, pushing yourself forward so the shape of him is firmer against you, and Tom slips another finger in.
Youâll take it, wonât you? Yes.Â
Maybe you donât need to tear him at the seams (though you want to) to make it even. Maybe this is punishment enough. That he can have you like this and it still wonât make you his, that heâll give you everything and youâll lap at it with half the greed he possesses.
You ride his hand, clutching his shoulders, rocking your hips. You take all of it, and it builds something delirious inside you, that itâs him doing this, his perfect fingers, the shape of his lips, the soft dark of his hair when you find your hands in it again. The feeling makes you stutter, and he has to move you by the waist himself to keep the momentum when you can't do it yourself.
Heâs painfully stiff, pushing up against you with a degree of self-control that feels like it can only end disastrously for the both of you, and you start smattering kisses down his cheek. You tilt his head back and lick a stripe down his neck. Rest now, you'd say if you could.
But he adds a third finger and your head falls, a cry planted in his collar when you come, and you don't think you say anything.
Tom holds your legs steady, guiding you through it like this is just another one of his studies. You are what he knows better than anything else, and still he wants to learn more.
âLook at you,â he mutters, dipping you back to press his lips down your chest, unclasping your bra while youâre still breaking, the sensation swelling again when he takes a nipple into his mouth.
âTom,â you try to say. Your mouth is the sticky sort of dry that words refuse to come out of.
âWill you give me more?â
Give, not take. You fuss into a stolen kiss, grappling again with his trousers, pulling them down until you can palm him through his boxers.
He hisses, gripping your wrist like he hadnât just done the same to you, and then heâs pulling you up and off the couch, trousers discarded with what must be magic because you blink and theyâre gone. Greedy boy. (You have no room to judge.) Your back is to the wall an instant before his fingers are on you again, pushing your underwear down your thighs until it falls at your feet like they despised to ever part from you.
You arch to feel him press against your stomach, pushing off the wall so that you can meld to him but he just closes in on you to do it himself.
He goads the heat from you when his fingers push in again, still wet, coiling how you like, where you like â
âWant you,â you protest shakily, hand on his abdomen.
That must kill him a little, because he curses under his breath (a thing he never does) and the immediate absence of his touch is cruel when he goes to free himself from his boxers. You reach for him without thinking as he does, and he pins your hand beside you when your fingers so much as graze the length of him.
You sound frail, but you have to ask. âIs this how you wanted me?â
A cruder version of you would go on. Is this how you pictured it? Taking me against a wall? Have you waited for it all this time?
And you donât belong to him but youâre so incomprehensibly, contradictorily his. Youâll want him forever. He could do anything, and youâd be his. You could haunt him into his lonely eternity, and heâd be yours. Then, you suppose â haunting him makes him yours by principle.
Maybe you already do.
Tom practically growls into your mouth, pressing against you and â God, itâs skin on skin. He's right there. You could push forward and â
He slides in. You cry out at the feel of him inside you, the angle of it like this.
âI wanted you,â he says lowly, your legs wrapped around him, âeverywhere.â
Youâre gripping him so tight you think heâll bleed under your nails and somehow you still feel on the brink of collapse when he thrusts deeper.
âI thought mostly of your mouth,â he rasps. âIt felt depraved to imagine it wrapped around me, but then I thought of you splayed out before me instead. That maybe youâd like it if it was my mouth on you.â
You whimper.
âWould you like that?â he asks, hands spanning your hips to snap them into his, like you are a piece removed from him he seeks to reattach.
If you wanted to answer you couldnât. Youâre clinging to him and the rising surge inside you, carved between your legs like something sweltering and unfixable. It rushes in and he pulls out of you. He pushes in and you cry for the release of it, the moment the wave lurches over the edge, but he wonât let you have it.
âBut,â he says, and your eyes want to roll back at how heavy his restraint is, callous in the tone of his voice, some leash at his neck he must tug himself lest you take it from him â âIf I knew how well youâd take me like this, I would have thought of it much more.â
Taking him, again â you donât feel at all like thatâs whatâs happening. You feel possessed. You are buoyant in his arms: his and his and his.
âYou can â uh â you can â â
"Hm?" He brushes down the slope of your brow, your cheek, back to the edge of your mouth, wiping a trail of saliva from your chin. âPoor thing.â
And he slams into you again, drawing a mewl from you that slices your unfinished thought.
You clench around him, flames wild and fluttering at every contact of his skin on yours, and there are too many to count. Too many points where they intersect, just some blend of bodies connected at every curve.
âYouâre going to give me more,â he says, like itâs an epiphany when you already told him you would.
You remember then. What you meant to say. âYou can take me too.â
You feel him twitch inside you, his pace stilling for a moment, and the thumb on your lip slips into your mouth. Your lips close around him and he curses again.
He fucks you with a finger in your mouth and his teeth clamped over your shoulder, soothing the sting with his tongue. His pace is too slow when he drags his free hand between your legs, but you understand its purpose well enough that the mere recognition almost destroys you.Â
Heâs patient in bringing you to the edge because there's time here. A slow agony that severs you from the rest of the world until it splits you down the middle. And he may not ever have it again.
You have to promise yourself heâll never have it again.
But the movement of his fingers against the same spot heâs hitting inside you is too much at once, and you wonât last. You drool around his thumb. You let him mark you. You can see on his neck youâve marked him too. And you hope impossibly thereâs a scar. You hope the little death you coax from him claims him as yours for eternity, keeps him even when you're gone. You tighten, lurch for the edge, and make him mortal once more.
Tom holds you there, your cries reverberating as he sinks another finger in your mouth, and then heâs gasping at your neck, peeling back to look you in the eyes when he spills into you. Your eyes screw together and he releases the sounds you make by holding you by the jaw instead.
âLook at me,â he says, and for the strained need in it you do.
You come down to earth and you kiss him, wetness dripping down your thighs as he pins you to this moment. You love him. Youâll always love him.
Heâs still inside you when heâs secure enough to bring you to his bed, only removing himself from you when youâre safely in his sheets, legs surrendering their grip on his waist as you pull apart. You pant into the cold linen of his pillow. Everything smells like him. Thereâs something empty now; the reason you came today; the reason you left four years ago.
You love him and it isnât enough. Not even to look at him, the sleepy hint of the boy you knew in his eyes, and know that he loves you too.
âGoodnight, Tom,â you say, finding home in the warmth of his chest.
Youâll dream of a morning where you wake up beside him, but you wonât be there.
#tom riddle#tom riddle x reader#tom riddle x you#tom riddle x y/n#tom riddle fluff#tom riddle smut#tom riddle angst#(the trifecta)#tom marvolo riddle#voldemort#voldemort x reader#tom riddle imagine#tom riddle oneshot#harry potter fanfiction#wizarding world#ftltutbh
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Headcanons to Dating Yandere Tom Riddle:
WARNINGS: MDNI! Yandere, stalking, implied dubcon, mentions of sex, violence, mentions of blood, mentions of breeding, mentions of wife, mentions of marriage, etc.
SUMMARY: A chance to experience what dating Tom Riddle is like, even when it's against your will to do just that.
AUTHOR'S NOTE: So, this headcanons leans more into dating Yandere Tom Riddle but technically, even without the yandere and dark part, he will do questionably dark things for his partner. I'm planning to make other headcanons that goes into details about that specific situation. For example, a "Headcanons to Dark Tom Riddle x Pregnant Wife Reader"
MASTERLIST & REQUESTS: Before you go, have a glass of wine or better yet, recommend a good bottle. any kind of message is always a delight.
It doesn't matter where you come from, alright? Although it's important for Tom to have an excellent muggle free reputation, Tom has his ways to make sure any history you have with muggles are erased. No one knows your precise history because of it either, but according to their Dark Lord, you were a witch from a fine family in France. While that might have been true, what they didn't know was how you were actually a rebel and fought against him for a time until he kidnapped you.
You left him with no choice! He was infatuated with you due to your strength and infamous beauty. Tom kept on sending you gifts, invitations to balls even and attempted to bait you to become Dumbledore's spy in order to get closer to you. However, you rejected all his gifts and invitations, burning them into the fireplace as soon as they arrived.
You were intelligent enough to know about his plan, but as evil and cruel as Tom was, he was also a genius.
When Tom kidnapped you, you had screamed all the curses in the world at him, refusing for him to even touch you. However, it silenced down when you saw several death eaters pointing their wands to the necks of your little sister and other family members.
You were a rebel and if Tom tried to take you with the threat of hurting your family, he knew you would continue to reject him. After all, actions speak louder than words, and as the death eaters began to torture your family, you finally got on your knees and pleaded for him to stop. Tom was more than pleased with your actions, but to ensure that you will stay true to your promise, he demanded a kiss from you, which you reluctantly gave in the form of a peck on the lips.
Though Tom had spared your family, he will make sure you never see them again. One way or another, no matter how many times you plead and beg to see them, he will rip you away from your family for the sole reason so that your focus would not waver from him. Yeah, he's that possessive of you.
Speaking of being possessive, Tom from the beginning of the relationship will always make sure you are covered in the finest silk and most rarest yet stunning jewellery. You might try to refuse them at first, but you don't quite get it. All of the fine dresses, luxurious clothes and expensive jewellery that he had picked out for you was also his way to tell others that you're his, that you're his possession. Try to refuse it and he will punish you.
There are various of punishments Tom can give you. It depends on what you have done that made him measure how severe the punishment should go, but it also depended on his mood. If Tom was only lightly jealous, he'll most likely just leave marks on you like hickeys and bruises. However, if Tom was severely jealous.. then prepare yourself. Tom had once fucked you in front of two of your old friends whom he had taken as prisoner as a way to humiliate you after you had tried to communicate with them in their cells. Just don't defy him, okay? It won't end up good for you.
Other than that though, Tom will take care of you. He feeds you well, pampers you and even shower you with affection from time to time, which you always try to refuse. Tom tries to spend some time with you whenever he has the time, even with the ongoing war. Tom doesn't usually allow you to be out of the manor, but with his company, he allows you to wander around the garden and as much as you hate his company, a bit of fresh air will certainly do you good after being stuck inside for a long time.
However, with all that, he expects you to do your duties as well. You both might not be married yet, but Tom already views you as his wife, the only thing lacking is a wedding ring between your fingers and a ceremony. It will happen sooner than later. But due to it, you became the lady of the manor is your job to make sure that everything was going well in your 'home', telling the servants on what they must do to keep the cleanliness of the house.
And oh, on that note, you're not able to ask for them to help you escape. You learnt that the hard way because the day after you had tried to ask them, all of their tongues had disappeared, unable to speak properly anymore.
Tom desires to flaunt you to the public after making your relationship with him 'official'. However, he will only start bringing you to balls after he was sure that you will behave and Tom might just make a potion to help with that. He considers it as one of the duties you have to perform as his partner. But oh my, you do look ravishing in that tight dress he picked out for you.
At times during the night, you found Tom rubbing your stomach, eyes full of desire, as he thought fondly of children. He had been unsure of starting a family before. Of course Tom needed an heir, but he didn't think he would ever find himself wanting more children until he met you. It didn't matter if you didn't want children. Sooner or later, before or after marriage, you will be swollen with his child. And what better way to ensure an heir than start now?
#harry potter#imagines#headcannons#yandere imagines#yandere headcanons#yandere#yandere tom riddle#tom riddle#tom riddle smut#tom riddle imagine#tom riddle headcanon#stalker#lovesick#housewife#marriage#breeding k1nk
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Secret's Safe ŕź*¡Ë
18+ MDNI !!!
Pairing: Tom Riddle x Fem! Reader / You
Summary: Kinktober 2024 Day 15 - Blackmail. Reader discovers Riddle's true blood status and divulges this information to him. Riddle assumes she must be here to blackmail him and immediately attempts to seduce her, but things aren't all that simple for him actually going through with it.
Tags: Blackmail, Mildly dubious consent (barely), P in V sex, Biting, Virgin!Tom (implied), Pureblood politics, Sexism, Implied/Referenced death, murder and violence, Unspoken feelings, Feelings realisation, Oddly quite fluffy, Tom is forced to be vulnerable emotionally.
Word count: 5.5k
Read it on ao3! | Masterlist
Authors note: Lets not discuss how long this is or how late it is, thank you!! This ended up way different than I imagined going in, Tom is a bad guy in this like he's committed murders... but he's also inexperienced and realises he loves you so... This is nowhere near as dark as I thought it would be, the blackmail is barely blackmail!! Hope you like it mwah ( ââĄâ)㣠âĄ
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Well, this was certainly interesting. Youâd never expected this, but the more you thought about it, the more it made sense. The surname Riddle had never sounded familiar to you, and growing up, at all the Pureblood parties, no one had ever met Tom or any supposed family members. After the first year, he had started attending, but never with any family in tow, usually as a guest of Abraxas or somebody else. Why you hadnât questioned it before you had no idea, you felt rather foolish now. Hindsight was always 20/20. Of course, there were those few pureblood families, like the Weasleys, who didnât bother about those sorts of events, but Riddle had never given the impression that he came from such a family, always implying very powerful origins. In a way, he wasnât wrong, with one discovery came another, that he was the heir of Slytherin. This was peripherally problematic to you, but you couldnât put your finger on why it bothered you so much. Some distant memory writhing in the back of your mind, not making itself known. But the most glaring discovery for you had been Riddleâs muggle father. You were sure nobody knew about this, or else he certainly wouldnât be in the circles he was in.Â
The way you had discovered it had been rather unlikely, something Riddle surely wouldnât have been counting on. You and Walburga were partnered on a project for Advanced Charms, it being the final year of Hogwarts, standards for what you came up with were high. After weeks of deliberation and workshopping, youâd settled on a book which could tell you family histories. Initially, the bookâs function was for you to write in a plant name, and to see which other plant species it was closely related to and other pieces of information. Certainly interesting, but a little too Herbology for either of your liking, spitting out information neither of you could quite understand. After presenting the book to Professor Beery for a hefty extra credit and house point sum, you went back to workshopping. Youâd figured out one evening how to get it to trace family histories, and this was the perfect idea, as all the information that came out was easy to understand, but could also be deeply valuable. Youâd spent all evening fine-tuning it with Walburga. She was intimately familiar with her family history, so you used her as a control, making sure the facts remained accurate as you messed with the magic. It was finally done, and you would be presenting it next week. Youâd taken the book back to your dorm and messed around with it before bed, taking great amusement in some of the ancient wizardâs names. Naming conventions had been so odd at some points. You traced practically every single one of your friends' histories, before landing on Riddleâs.Â
Riddle wasnât really a friend, as such. You sort of ran in the same circles and you were courteous to one another, but you werenât close and at times you found him a little irksome. Perhaps it was this mythos that surrounded him, the idea that he had slept with three-quarters of the girls at Hogwarts who were of age. The idea that he could have you undone with one touch and that he did so often. Part of you was almost bitter he hadnât propositioned you, given how much he allegedly got around, but you always felt he was intimidated by your intelligence. All the other girls, sure they were driven and intelligent, but they seemed to dumb themselves down around him, make themselves smaller. It was probably not even a conscious thing, many of the pureblood girls had been taught growing up never to threaten a manâs ego in any way. Youâd always thought this was nonsense, that if you were more intelligent than a man that he ought to know it and neednât be coddled, but for most of the girls, it just came naturally from a lifetime of training. You never bothered to shrink yourself around Riddle, to giggle and write off your high marks as a fluke if he came asking, you would simply say you did well because you were intelligent, and you guessed he didnât like this because he avoided you for the most part. Whenever he did speak to you, it was usually to compare grades, or, in a group setting. He always seemed to know just a little too much about what was going on with you, what grades youâd gotten, what teachers you were meeting with. You chalked it up to him being Head Boy, but no one else received quite this much attention.Â
You wrote down his name into the book anyway, figuring the surname âRiddleâ begat some entertaining first names. What immediately greeted you as the information materialised on the page had been a bit of a shock. His father, whose name was otherwise completely unfamiliar to you, did not have any parents listed, or further back. You sat in confusion for a moment trying to figure out why that could be, but came to no conclusions. You pushed the thought away and studied his motherâs heritage. Merope Gaunt. Gaunt, finally a name you recognised, but not a woman you could ever attest to having met at any pureblood events. You realise sheâs listed as dead, that would perhaps explain a thing or two. You feel a hint of sympathy creeping over you at the realisation that both his parents are listed as dead, his father only rather recently. You wondered why he hadnât mentioned to anyone that his father had died over the previous summer. You trace his ancestry back all the way to Salazar Slytherin, momentarily impressed, before the realisation of why his father has no listed relatives hits you. The book was made only to track wizarding blood. His father was a muggle.Â
The realisation was immediately brushed off. No, there was some other explanation, Riddle was one of the most pompous purebloods you knew, even by your standards, the idea of his father being a muggle was preposterous. You went back over the enchantments on the book, trying to figure out what other reason there might be for his fatherâs heritage to be blank, but come up empty-handed. He had to be a muggle.Â
You keep the information to yourself for the next few days, turning it over in your mind. A muggle, it was very hard to believe, especially with how Riddle acted. He probably noticed your staring, but you couldnât stop yourself from doing it, seeing him in an entirely new light. Tom Riddle, the orphan, the half-blood. It was confusing, to say the least. Your staring problem must have been worse than you thought because one day he sweeps you aside in the Slytherin common room and smiles charmingly.
âIs there an issue?â he prompts politely, eyes drinking in your face. âOnly you keep staring,â you blink at him. Youâre almost tempted to tell him âI know who you are,â but you keep it inside for now.
âShouldnât you be used to that?â you smile. He chuckles slightly.Â
âI donât get the feeling youâre merely admiring me,â his eyes study yours for a moment and then he takes hold of your arm, leaning a little closer. âTell me what it really is,â his voice is low and smooth as velvet, and for a moment you understand his mythos a little better. You glance around the busy common room.Â
âIâm sure you wouldnât like me to say it here,â you try to subtly warn him, but he clearly understands this to mean something suggestive, his brow raising.Â
âI see,â
âIf you really must know, then we must go somewhere private,â you insist, knowing how much this could blow up in his face if word spread around the common room. Youâre not even sure why youâre shielding him from it, perhaps the revelation of his mother dying in childbirth makes you more gracious toward him. Youâre surprised how much he hesitates, given how heâs interpreted the situation. If heâs supposedly slept with most of the girls in the year group, why would it be you who gives him pause? You know youâre not ugly enough for him to be this apprehensive, does he really feel so threatened by you? It all seems odd. Finally, he leads you away, toward his dorm room, private quarters for the Head Boy. You realise how this must all look, to him and to onlookers, but youâre sure heâs in for quite the disappointment when he discovers what this is really about. He gestures for you to sit at his desk and he sits on the edge of his bed. The distance he puts between you intrigues you, what is this about?Â
âWell?â he urges, swallowing a little. Why is he so anxious? Does he know somehow already? Youâve never seen him like this before.
âThis really isnât what you think it is,â you begin. His brows furrow. âI uh⌠know about your father,â Riddle goes unbelievably tense and red in the face, his breaths becoming laboured. You watch him, curious. He glares at you scruntinisngly. There are several things you might be referring to, all of them bad, he doesnât know from your expression which it is.Â
âWhat?â he croaks, his usual composure hanging on by a thread, youâre worried heâs about to lash out and start smashing up the room and you with it. His body is taut like a bowstring.
âThat heâs a muggle,â you respond. You canât understand why he relaxes slightly at this, but he does, though he still looks tense and mortified. He puffs out a breath, rubbing a hand over his face. Heâs not arguing, so you know it must be true. âAnd that heâs dead,â you add. He tenses all over again, his eyes flicking back to you. âSorry for your loss,â he relaxes once more.
âRight yes⌠that was⌠terrible when he⌠died,â he puffs out, unsure how to interpret this situation. You donât look angry or scared, so you must be missing a few puzzle pieces here. He should have expected that someone would discover this one day, his surname wasnât a part of the sacred 28. He hadnât known about that in the first year, and once heâd already introduced himself as pureblood, he could hardly backtrack or change his name, so he just prayed his confidence would keep him getting by, and surprisingly it had, until now. It wasnât a surprise it was you who found out, you were always irritatingly observant, it was honestly more of a surprise it had taken this long. He stares at you for a moment and you stare back. âWhat do you want?â he asks, figuring youâve come to gloat in his face and demand he do your homework for the rest of the year or something. He would do it, he really couldnât afford this getting out, especially not to his Knights. The fact you hadnât already told everyone indicated an intention to blackmail him, you could have easily spread the word already, but you were smarter than that, he knew you were.
âWhat do I want?â you tilt your head quizically.
âI assume youâre here to blackmail me, so just tell me already,â he sighs, resting his elbows on his knees and his head in his hands. He was furious with himself that he hadnât prepared in any way for this eventuality. What would he have done if youâd spread the word without coming to him first? His whole plan, everything heâd been working for would have crumbled in minutes. He would have probably killed you, although the thought gives him pause now, it wouldnât have really fixed things anyway.Â
Blackmail hadnât actually crossed your mind, but you supposed you were in the perfect position to do so. As you watched him, discomposed for seemingly the first time in his life, you realised just how much he needed this information to remain secret with you. You could ask him for anything and he would probably do it. At your silence, Riddle lets out a frustrated howl and collapses back onto his bed, clearly thinking youâre playing some game with him. He runs his hands through his hair, staring up at the canopy above his bed. His hair is messed up, you realise youâve never seen it like this, free of its immaculate style. The look suits him. His arms thud onto the bed at his sides and he groans again. You stand and come to kneel beside him on the bed without much thought. He looks up at you through his lashes, half angry, half intensely vulnerable. It's odd to be looking down at him like this, but itâs also a little exhilarating.
âJust tell me what you want, Iâll give it to you,â he pleads, staring up at you. âCome on, darling,â he tries his best to be his charming self even in this state, reaching for your hand. âIâll do anything,â His cold hand on yours stirs something odd in you, he brings the back of your hand to his mouth and kisses it, his eyes locked on yours. Heâs not sure what heâs doing, but itâs working, he watches as you blush. He kisses slowly up your arm, eyes locked on yours the whole while. As his lips brush the ticklish skin of the inside of your elbow, you finally withdraw your arm. He frowns, thinking heâd figured you out.
âWhy have you never propositioned me?â you ask, your voice a little too serious for how insecure the question sounds leaving your lips. His brows furrow and he moves to sit up in front of you.
âWhat do you mean?â
âI mean, youâve supposedly slept with nearly the entire legal female population of Hogwarts and youâve never propositioned me?â you hate how insecure you sound, but itâs something that you realise has been bothering you for a long time, as stupid as it is. He stares at you.
âYouâre supposed to be smart,â he scoffs, and then changes his approach, figuring offending you is a terrible idea at the moment. âHave you ever actually spoken to any girl who has a story about sleeping with me, or is it all hearsay?â his words make you comb back through all the wild stories youâve heard. Heâs right, none of them have ever come directly from someone, all having started with something to the effect of âmy friend heardâŚâ. You study his face for a moment and he raises a prompting brow.
âNo, I suppose youâre right,â you admit, chewing your lip. There are so many things that you should have been paying more attention to, this was another plainly obvious fact with hindsight. âSo⌠whatâs the truth?â he looks away from you, hesitating. âOh come on, as if I donât know worse things about you by now,â you tease. He glares for a moment but concedes that youâre right about that.Â
âNone of it is true, no girl at this school is⌠good enough for me, I suppose,â he mumbles, sticking his chin up.Â
âGood enough for you?â you hum.
âI canât give myself away to just anyone⌠itâsâŚâ he hesitates, knowing he sounds completely pathetic despite his attempts to reframe this.Â
âYouâre waiting for the right person?â you chuckle. âHow uncharacteristic of you,â he huffs.
âOh shut up, will you? Itâs just⌠I donât trust⌠very easily⌠and people underestimate how much trust is involved in an act like sex⌠you are completely vulnerable, physically and emotionally,â he crosses his arms defensively as he explains himself. âYou could hardly defend yourself if the other person were to attack you during it,â you tilt your head at him. âIt leaves you weak, in every sense of the word, so I have seen no need to participate,â
âThat must have been a big disappointment to many witches,â you tease. He rolls his eyes.Â
âI can usually charm my way out of any issues, and the gossip around my âconquestsâ has persisted, so it canât have caused that much strife,â he finishes. You hum, supposing heâs right. âNone of the girls are intelligent enough for me here,â he asserts. You scoff.
âAwfully sexist of you,â
âHardly,â he snaps back. âNone of the boys are suitable either, but I donât consider them because Iâm not⌠that way inclined,â
âAnyway, I didnât think you liked intelligence in a woman,â you add.Â
âWhy would I not? I love intelligence, I require intelligence, I would never fraternise with somebody lacking intellect, I would be far too bored,â he glances at you from the corner of his eye.
âBut you donât seem to like when I assert my intelligence,â you shrug.
âYouâre different,â
âWhy?â you laugh in disbelief. âIâm too intelligent that it threatens you?â
âNo!â he hisses. âFor one, you use your brains for the most infuriating of things, such as looking into my family history,â youâre tempted to interrupt him and tell him that the discovery had been an accident but you stay quiet.Â
âAnd for two?â you press. Heâs silent for a long moment.Â
âIs this what you wanted? Blackmailing me into an argument? Because Iâm sure we could have found a reason to argue without all this,â he griped. You sighed. No, you hadnât particularly wanted to argue, you hadnât particularly wanted anything, youâd intended to keep this information to yourself really and then when it had come out, you hadnât considered blackmail until he brought it up. Your mind flashes back to his kisses up your arm, a warm tingle going through you.Â
âWere you attempting to seduce me earlier?â he glances at you, his cheeks just slightly pink. âEven though youâre waiting for the right person?â you add with a chuckle. He sighs.Â
âI might have been, I figured it was my best bet,â he shrugs it off, feigning nonchalance.Â
âWhat would you have done if I had gone with it?â you tilt your head curiously.
âGone with it, I suppose,â he looks down, fiddling with his tie pin, feeling more uncomfortable than he was ever used to feeling.
âYouâd have slept with me?â you enquire. He nods subtly, puffing out a short breath. âEven though I might have stabbed you in the back or something?â you tease. He glares at you.
âYou wouldnât do that,â he dismisses.
âSo you trust me?â you challenge. He immediately opens his mouth to protest but then falters. Does he trust you? He knows you would never attack him physically, and he tries to brush that off as the belief that you are physically weak, but he knows thatâs not true. If he were to attack you, he has no doubt you would put up quite a fight, but that you would never initiate. He hadnât even thought through the fact that despite all his reservations, he really had been trying to seduce you, and not even reluctantly. He would have slept with you, and he wouldnât have been afraid of what you might do to him. Sure, the emotional vulnerability was still a point of contention, but initially, he hadnât had the time to consider that. Now that heâs given it some proper consideration, why is he not changing his mind?
âI suppose,â his voice is strained, like this is taking a great deal of effort for him to say. âThat in some weird way I do trust you,â his expression is pained and he wonât look at you, but you know those words mean way more than they do on the surface. Heâs never admitted to trusting anyone before, at least not truthfully, and to admit it to you⌠itâs frightening, and yet he did it anyway. You hold out your hand to him to see what heâll do. He takes your cue despite himself, taking hold of it and kissing the back of your hand a few times. His lips are gentle and you quite like the feeling. Sure, he told you the rumours about him were false, but perhaps he really could make you come undone with just one touch, if you only showed him where to put it. âIâll sleep with you if thatâs what you like,â he admits quietly. âI need you to keep my secret, Iâll do anything,â
âWould you like to sleep with me?â you ask. He looks up at you, lips pressing against your wrist. His look is a little pained again, youâre not sure how to read it.
âIâll do it,â he grits out.
âBut do you want to? I donât want to force you to sleep with meâŚâ you try again. He gives you that pained look once more. He doesnât want to say it out loud, to admit to such weaknesses as need and lust, he hopes you understand without words. He kisses all the way up your arm, leaning closer and caging you in as he starts to press kisses to your neck. You exhale shakily, placing your hands on his shoulders as he continues to lavish you with tender kisses. He presses you back, back until you fall onto his pillows and he follows you down, positioning his body over you, his hands on either side of your shoulders. Heâs breathing hard as he looks down at you, his pupils dilated. You stare back up at him, still a little unsure. âRiddle⌠donât force yourself, I donâtââ
He cuts you off with a deep kiss to your lips, you gasp slightly and he takes the opportunity to slip his tongue into your mouth, exploring slowly. This kiss is not forced, this kiss is genuine and furiously wanting and the thought makes you moan. He shivers in return, kissing a little harder. Your hands come to his shoulders again as he comes to rest on his forearms, his neck no longer straining to you. You part your legs so he can settle between them, his hips pressing to yours. You canât help but gasp again when you feel his erection press against you. He smiles against your lips, his signature cocky smirk returning.Â
âYou sound amazing when you gasp like that for me,â he taunts. You roll your eyes, kissing him once more. Itâs almost impressive how heâs able to maintain that arrogant air throughout all this. You hate it, yet you canât deny the soft pulsing feeling between your legs. He continues to kiss you, his lips pressing against yours, his tongue slowly swirling and caressing, the sound of your lips meeting is both erotic and hypnotic, lulling you further into your aroused state. Your eyes are closed in bliss, but occasionally you open them for a glimpse of him. His lashes flutter as he kisses you, his cheeks are flushed which you didnât even realise was possible before today, and his hair falls forward, surprisingly curling up a little as it encounters the sweat forming on his forehead. He kisses you like itâs his favourite thing in the world, gentle yet thorough, and you hope it is so that you might get to do this with him again. His kisses get a little needier as you feel him hardening further against you, pressing against you more insistently. Your hand settles on the back of his neck and you hold him in place as he kisses you. He grunts appreciatively, sucking on your bottom lip. He sits up suddenly, disconnecting your lips. You pant as you stare up at him in confusion, wondering if heâs stopping this from going further, but instead, heâs loosening your tie. You lie there and let him do the work, after all, heâs meant to be keeping you sweet. He doesnât seem to mind. He takes great satisfaction in slowly peeling away your clothes, discarding your tie, and then unbuttoning your shirt. Heâs making you vulnerable beneath him and heâs drunk on the feeling, although, he doesnât intend to hurt or exploit you, heâs never had such pure intentions in anything heâs done before in his life. Which is odd, considering youâre about to sleep together. He traces the lace of your bra with his fingertips. âBeen expecting me?â he teases, wondering about how nice the bra is, black and lacy.
âNo, just a happy accident,â you chuckle as he runs the lace between his fingers. Heâs a little disappointed that you hadnât had this all planned out all along, but he figures thereâs plenty of time for that in the future. It doesnât occur to him at the moment that heâs just admitted to himself that he intends to do this again with you. He takes hold of your waist and eases you up to sit. He gives you a few gentle kisses on your neck, making you throw your head back and then he reaches around to your back to unclasp your bra. Heâs heard horror stories of embarrassment from his peers, so takes a moment to acquaint himself with the mechanism, running his hands back and forth along your back as you rest heavily against his chest, your chin on his shoulder. Once he understands how it works, he uses both hands to unhook it easily. He slides the straps down your arms and bares you to his gaze. You lean back to give him a view, enjoying his wide-eyed look. He cups your breasts in his hands and kisses you once again. He lays you back down, gently kneading your flesh, groaning at the feeling. Youâre soft and warm and it feels so good that he wishes youâd found out he was half-blood earlier, or that heâd been less stuck-up this whole time and propositioned you like you seem to have wanted. He moves his hands down to your stomach, stroking for a moment before popping to button on your skirt and sliding down the zip. He then eases the fabric down over your hips.
âMatching set,â he comments upon spying your lacy black underwear. âSure you werenât expecting me?â you roll your eyes.Â
âYes, Iâm sure,â
âSomeone else?â he questions as uninterestedly as possible. You chuckle, sensing the hint of jealousy in his tone.
âNo, just wanted to feel good for myself,â he nods at your answer, hoping you donât spot his relief. He runs his hands up and down your hips and waist, occasionally squeezing the supple flesh.Â
âThe female body is quite⌠pleasant under the hands,â he comments, kneading your hips gently. You give him a look. âWell⌠your body is anyway,â he runs his thumbs over your stomach. You smile up at him and he avoids your gaze, not wanting to confront the way that look just made him feel. He decides to speed things along, desperate to come out of this alive. He moves back enough to remove his own tie and shirt, secretly enjoying the way youâre watching. Then he stands and slowly lowers his trousers, taking his boxers with them. Thereâs no use delaying the inevitable and heâs hardly ashamed of his body. He steps out of his trousers and sits back down between your legs. He kneads your thighs as he lets you look him over.
âThat scar on your chestââ you begin but he cuts you off quickly with a kiss, not wishing to discuss this right now when heâs so close to you, to having you. If you started asking about all his various scars, youâd be here a long time, and youâd run away from him well before he finally got to sink into your cunt for the first time. The thought stirs his cock. No, he canât let you ask questions until later, he needs to have this at least once, he hasnât even realised how much heâs been waiting for it. For⌠you. His cock rests heavily on you through the lace of your underwear, hot to the touch. He kisses you intently, sensual and all-consuming until you forget your line of questioning. Heâs smug that heâs able to do that to you, perhaps he should have kissed you the second you started bringing things up you weren't supposed to. Perhaps by the end of this, youâll have forgotten how it started and only remember the way heâd made you feel. Yes, that would be good. The thought urges him on, he nearly rips off your underwear. You squeak indignantly and he kisses your neck in an effort to placate you. He didnât really care if heâd ripped them or not, but he couldnât have you turning your back on him now. Not after heâs bared himself like this. He reaches down and lines himself up with you, ready to plunge in, but one last thought keeps him at bay.
âAre you on the potion?â he grunts, nuzzling into your neck.Â
âYeah,â you swallow, staring down at where the two of you are about to be joined together. He waits for nothing else, easing himself into you, he groans loudly against your neck, the warmth surrounding him feeling euphoric. Your arms settle around his back, holding him close to you and he lets you, leaning against you heavily. He grits his teeth, trying to keep in control, but he canât. His hips start rutting into you fast, he needs this and he has you now, he canât stop himself. You grip his shoulders hard, gasping and wailing, the sounds only egging him on.Â
âYeah?â he groans between thrusts as you whine sweetly in his ear. âThat feel good..? fuckâŚâ heâs not one to usually swear in this way, part of his charming demeanour, but he canât help it slipping out with you. You make him all sorts of vulgar that heâs never been before. He pounds into you, glad that you donât seem to mind his ferocity. Heâll be gentle with you some other time, but right now, all this pent-up energy needs to come out, and youâre receiving it so well. âTaking me so well, darling,â he chokes out, and you moan in response, seemingly touched by his words. He lifts himself up onto his hands, staring down at you, his hips slamming into yours. He watches your beautiful face in fascination as it twists with pleasure. Heâs never taken so much enjoyment in making someone feel good before, it reminds him of the feeling he gets when he exerts power over someone, but better, because itâs you and heâÂ
He canât finish that thought, he refuses to. Itâs too much. He keeps up his relentless pace, closing his eyes because the sight of you is stirring his chest along with the stirring in his stomach. His thrusts slow, but become deeper and more powerful. You moan unabashedly under him and the sound invades his mind, consuming him completely. He leans back down and buries his face in your neck biting down as his hips stutter and he spills deep inside you. The biting is the only thing preventing him from saying something he knows heâll regret in his dizzy orgasmic state. Three disgusting little words that heâs never thought before in his life, that surely, he canât mean now, even if theyâre fighting their way out of his mouth. When he feels you orgasming around him, he clamps down on your neck harder, tasting a little blood. He finds himself feeling sorry for doing it. He lets go, gasping for breath. He presses a kiss to the bite mark on your neck, reluctantly apologetic. You whimper beneath him and he pulls back to check youâre okay. You are, just overwhelmed, he is too, though heâs not letting it show as blatantly as you are. He withdraws slowly from you, whining in tandem with you at the feeling. He sits back up between your legs, looking down at you. Your eyes are closed as you gather yourself. You trust him enough to lie there with your eyes closed, he could do anything to you right now. Things he has done to others before, and yet there you lie, trusting him like he trusts you. He scoops you up into his arms and rests your head against his shoulder.Â
âIâm sorry for drawing blood,â he mumbles as if itâs enough of an excuse for him to hold you like this. He kisses the bite mark again, secretly a little thrilled that itâs there, a physical reminder of all this. He soothes your back, rubbing soft circles, an action heâs never performed before. âYouâll keep my secret right?â he asks, and realises suddenly he doesnât know what heâs referring to. The fact of his blood status? The lie of his mythos? The fact heâs just slept with you, been this vulnerable? Or⌠the worst one of them all? The unspoken words that heâs sure youâre smart enough to have heard in the silence by now. You donât know which heâs referring to either, but you answer sincerely nonetheless.Â
âYour secret is safe with me, Tom,â
︜âšď¸śď¸śŕ¨ŕ§ď¸śď¸śâšď¸ś
xoxoxo
thank you to @i-live-in-spite and several anonymous asks whose ideas I pulled from a little to form this plot, lots of love â¸(ď˝ĄË áľ Ë )â¸âĄ
#tom riddle#tom riddle smut#tom riddle x reader#tom marvolo riddle#tom riddle x y/n#tom riddle x you#harry potter#harry potter smut#slytherin boys#slytherin boys x reader#slytherin boys x you#tom riddle one shot#x reader#reader insert#fem reader#hogwarts smut#enemies to lovers#smut#kinktober#kinktober 2024#first post#tom riddle era#angst#voldemort#voldemort x reader#tom riddle kinktober#harry potter kinktober#tom riddle x reader smut#fanfic#tom riddle fluff
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Come Back, Be Here (finale)
Sirius Black x fem!reader - First Wizarding War Order of the Phoenix - 5.7k
p1 // p2 // p3 // p4 // p5 // p6 // p7 // p8
CW: mentions of past abuse/torture, amnesia, hurt/comfort, fluff, use of Y/N
A/N: Holy. Friggen. Crap. WHAT A RIDE! Thank you all so much for enjoying this story with me - it has truly felt like the most niche book club and I have had so much fun chatting with you all. Feel free to send in requests for these lovely characters in the CBBH universe - I'd love to continue playing with them! xx
Lily and James Potter returned to 12 Grimmauld place on the 3rd of November â Siriusâ birthday. There were long hugs, a lot of tears and soft dinner conversation, but there would be no gifts or raucous celebrating.Â
Regulus Black was arrested at Malfoy Manor as a marked Death Eater, but with the backing of James, Sirius and Dumbledore, the Ministry allowed Regulus to be placed on house arrest, confiscating his wand whilst he awaited trial. Dumbledore assured the group that because of Regulusâ defection, his support of the Order, and the memories that Dumbledore, you, and those who were present on October 31st provided the Ministry, Regulus would likely be acquitted of his charges, or at the very least receive a lighter sentence.Â
Tom Riddle was quickly charged with treason, tyranny, countless charges of the use of unforgiveables, countless charges of leading or causing the death of wizards, witches, and muggles, countless charges of torture and brutality, eliciting fear and chaos, and illegal use of Dark Magic. He was sentenced to the Dementorâs Kiss and the act was carried out on the 5th of November.Â
Peter Pettigrew did indeed receive a fair trial for his role in the Wizarding War. He was questioned under Veritaserum, and it was found that he was guilty of treason, using unforgiveables, contributing to the fear and chaos of a treasonous leader, the use of Dark Magic, and sexual assault and brutality. He was sentenced to life in Azkaban.
Lucius Malfoy came looking for his son and was thus arrested by the Department of Magical Law Enforcement on the charge of being a marked Death Eater. He was questioned under Veritaserum which proved Lucius was guilty of harboring dangerous criminals, using unforgiveables, contributing to the fear and chaos of a treasonous leader, and the use of Dark Magic. He was sentenced to life in Azkaban. His property and vault at Gringottâs were seized by the Ministry and, after taking what was owed for reparations, was placed into his sonâs name.Â
The Ministry respected Narcissa Malfoyâs dying wish and placed Draco Malfoy in the care of Sirius Black and Y/N L/N. The Ministry offered the couple access to the Malfoy vault to support Dracoâs upbringing, but they opted to leave it aside for the child to choose what to do with the fortune when he was of age.
Narcissa Malfoyâs funeral took place on the 7th of November. The blustery November air accosted the patrons which mostly consisted of Order members and a few of Narcissaâs friends who were able to dodge persecution for their roles or complacency in the war. She was awarded an Order of Merlin posthumously for her role - a title she now shared with you, Sirius, James, Lily, Remus, and later Regulus along with the rest of the Order of the Phoenix. Draco left his mother a beautiful bouquet of narcissus, babyâs breath, lavender, and pink cameliaâs. You and Sirius gave her a bouquet of edelweiss, fern, and gladioli. Blue hydrangeas and hyssops came from Regulus who was unable to attend due to the nature of his house arrest but were placed at Narcissaâs headstone by Lily and Harry in the family plot of Malfoy Manor. Andromeda, Ted and Nymphadora Tonks stood by you, Sirius, and Draco at the headstone during the funeral service as Dumbledore spoke of the bravery, loyalty, and dedication Narcissa showed not only to her son and her family, but to the greater wizarding world on the 31st of October.Â
âThere is not one witch or wizard amongst us today that does not owe Narcissa Black Malfoy a considerable debt. Without her bravery and cunningness, evil could very well have prospered, dooming us all to life of immense pain and suffering. She dreamed of a legacy - of a better future - for her own son as well as for every child of wizard kind. Narcissa was a beyond bright student during her time at Hogwarts, a strong leader in her social circle, a skilled healer during the war, and an incredibly brave soldier. Though, possibly her favourite and certainly her greatest role was that of a loving mother; for she died to ensure that her son would live to see a better tomorrow. Narcissa Black Malfoy is the type of person, friend, partner, and parent that each of us should aspire to be. May her legacy of love and loyalty live eternally.â He said as he raised his wand.
One by one, every person present raised their wand to the heavens in honour of Narcissa Malfoy and her sacrifice to the wizarding world. Draco, Harry and Nymphadora, along with the Weasley children and Neville Longbottom who did not yet have their own wands raised a narcissus flower in solidarity.
The remaining marauders, you, Lily, and Regulus did indeed stay at 12 Grimmauld place for some time. The house was unrecognizable from the time Regulus and Sirius spent growing up there; it was bright, it was colourful, it was full of childrenâs laughter and squealing, it was a place people liked to come to visit, and it was chock full of love.Â
The problem with the new and improved Grimmauld Place?Â
Your tribe quickly outgrew it.Â
As time went on, your memories seemed to return to you basically in full, and the full extent of your trauma reared its ugly head. For years you became hyper-focused on knowing where each member of your family was at any given moment, and a panic attack threatened any moment you didnât have everyone important to you within your periphery. The Third Worst Day⢠of Siriusâ life (in chronological order, the first being the day he almost ruined things between you two, the next being the day you âdiedâ) was the day Lily and James suggested to you, him, Remus, and Regulus that they should perhaps fix up Potter Manor and move their ever-growing family there. It was partly the worst day because of how the idea of James and Lily moving away made him feel, but it was mostly because of the mental breakdown you had at the news.Â
âYou canât! You canât do this! I just got you back, we just got each other back. You canât do this!â You shouted as everyone tried to get you to breathe. The numerous hands approaching you placatingly was in fact not what you needed at the moment, and you fell into a manic state.
Needless to say, the suggestion was not met well by you, and ended with you being admitted to the psychiatric ward at St. Mungoâs. Sirius sat at your bedside with your hand in his, Lily and James in chairs across from him whilst Regulus and Remus stayed home and watched the children.Â
âI cannot live without any of you anymore. Iâm sorry, but I refuse. I canât do it.â Sirius admitted quietly to his friends as he rubbed the back of your hand with his thumb.
You had been dosed heavily with calming draught and dreamless sleep in order to prevent any seizure activity, which you became plagued with due to the trauma of the brain from memory retention and prevention throughout the war.Â
âI canât either.â James admitted, causing Lily to turn and face him.
âIâm sorry Lilâs, I know-â he cut himself off to take a steadying breath. âI know when we got married, you probably imagined us living at the Manor or maybe in another place as independent adults. After we lost mum and dad, Iâm sure you imagined us taking that over in their place, and I think I wanted that too, but now, knowing what we know, I would have done things differently. I wish we had moved in with mum and dad and been there to enjoy their last few years with them. We had our own flat at the time and Moony, Pads, and Vix had theirs and I was so lucky that I got to spend as much time with Vixen as I did, being her order partner and all, but then she was gone, and I regretted ever spending a single moment away from her. Now...now Iâm afraid that every second I donât spend with you â all of you, any of you, my family â is a second wasted and I donât want to waste another precious second. Not anymore. Not ever again.âÂ
Lily looked imploringly at her husband.
âYou really are a bell-end.â She muttered fondly.
âPardon me?â
âDo you really think I imagined us living alone in that big ass manor just us and our kids? What part of that do you think appeals to me? I love you, James, but a girl needs backup to deal with the likes of you.âÂ
Sirius and James exchanged a bemused glance before Lily continued.
âI want to live the rest of my life with my family. Thatâs you, James, and our kids, but itâs also Sirius and Y/N, itâs Remus and Regulus and Draco. Hell, if Alice and Frank or Marlene and Dorcas told me they wanted to move in Iâd happily help them pack the boxes.â She laughed as she looked at you and Siriusâ intertwined hands.
âI think weâre all going to be stuck with one another until the end of time.â James said as he pulled his wife into his side.
Sirius smiled greatly at them. âUntil all the mischief is managed.â
After that, the friends all agreed that none of them were willing to part from the group, and if for whatever reason anyone felt the need for more privacy, they would opt to build an outbuilding on the property.
âOi! Youâve gotta knock, Prongs! Fuckinâ wanker.â Sirius had shouted as he hastily pulled the sheets up around the two of you.
âUhm, maybe youâve gotta lock the door, Pads.â James muttered with a mouthful of muffin as he came in to sit on the edge of the bed, completely unperturbed by the fact that the two of you were still naked and very recently involved in unmentionable deeds.Â
Nevertheless, no one ever felt the need to build their own place on the property.
And Sirius made sure James got a taste of his own medicine a time or two after that incident.
Lily Evans Potter did indeed contact Healer Grundke at the end of the war and was brought on to work under her as an intern whilst she worked toward getting her Healer license. She spent many years in general medicine before moving fulltime to labour and delivery. Sirius often teased her that between the number of days she has spent in labour & delivery as a patient and as a doctor, he was surprised any of their other friends ever saw her.Â
His nose was charmed green for a week.
Regulus Black was eventually acquitted of his crimes. He was placed on a sort of life-long probation in the form of a tracking spell on his wand that would alert the Ministry of him ever practicing Dark Magic. He opted to stay with his brother and his friends though he pretended to hate every minute of it. In truth, Regulus found great joy in being an uncle to Siriusâ and Jamesâ children and Godfather to his best friendâs daughter Luna Lovegood. He declined the opportunity to join the Wizengamot, stating that as the rightful heir to the Black name, Sirius should be the one to take the Blackâs seat.
Sirius Black, in Sirius Black fashion, dramatically refuted this idea. He did not want to pick up the mantle that was laid for him by the generations of Blackâs before him; he refused to sit in the nearly still warm seat that his father had left. It took Regulus, Remus, and Lily all to tell him how much good he could do by not only bringing in a younger generationâs perspective to the Wizengamot, but as a wealthy heir to a pureblood line, a war hero, and an advocate for werewolf and muggleborn rights, he could bridge the gap between the left and right-wing members of the court.
It also helped that you had told him heâd be the only one capable of making the robes look punk rock.Â
James Potter opted to be a stay-at-home dad and uncle to care for the children living at Potter Manor. The Potter vaults had enough money in them to last his family multiple lifetimes without every making a dent, and with the money Lily was making as a healer, there was no need to be worried financially. Also, being a kid at heart made him the absolute best friend of any child who met him. As the children grew older, he and Mrs. Weasley worked together to homeschool the children of the Order until they were old enough to attend Hogwarts.
Remus Lupin, never one willing to ride on his friendâs coat tails, spent the first few months following the war applying to various jobs through out Wizarding London. He had hoped that between his stellar academic record, his time spent as a prefect and tutor, his Order of Merlin, and his dedication to the winning side of the Wizarding War, that he would be able to secure a job within wizarding society. Unfortunately, it seemed the wizarding world still had a long way to go with the prejudice it held for werewolves. Walking through Diagon Alley feeling sorry for himself, Remus spotted a âfor leaseâ sign in the window of what used to be a pet store. He immediately sent an owl to the landlord and asked for a meeting.Â
Though Remus tried to refuse, Sirius and James insisted on investing in Remusâ planned bookstore.
âIâm not borrowing money, Prongs.â Remus muttered defiantly.
âItâs not borrowing, Moons! Itâs an investment! If anything, youâll be making me more money.â He exclaimed excitedly.
âMoony, please,â Sirius added...well, seriously, âthink of how pissed off my ancestors would be to know Iâm investing their money in a half-blood werewolfâs business which happens to stock muggle literature?âÂ
With a mischievous smirk, the deal was settled, and the lease was signed.Â
Remus wasted no time to get started at the bookstore. He walked into the small storefront and conjured a broom, deciding to start by sweeping up the hay and owl droppings.
No sooner had he started did he hear the door chime.Â
âOh! My apologies, weâre not quite open yet.â Remus offered as he made his way to the door. He stopped in his tracks when he saw you and Regulus standing in the entry.
âI should hope not. This place looks awful.â Regulus commented with a wrinkled nose.
You elbowed him hard in the ribs.
âLooks like you could use some help.â You said cheerily as you held out a stack of papers. Remus took them gently to find your CV and cover letter. Before Remus could even look up, Regulus dropped his on top of yours in Remusâ hand.
âAll my references are either dead or in prison so.â He offered with a shrug.
âIâll vouch for him.â You said.
You were smiling at him so kindly and so sweetly, Remus wanted to cry. You had always been his biggest supporter; championing him through every milestone in Remusâ life. He was certain he didnât deserve even half of the love you gave him, but he was eternally grateful for every drop of it.
âThank you, guys.â Remus said wetly as he pulled the two of you in for a hug. Regulus groaned the entire time but when Remus finally pulled away, he had a slight blush.Â
âYeah, yeah. Well, what is family for?â He muttered which elicited a sharp gasp from you and a bark of laugh from Remus.
âDonât be going soft on us now, Black!â Remus said with a laugh and ruffled his hair.Â
âFuck you guys, clean this barn up on your own.â He grumbled as he turned to leave, but the two of you wouldnât let him.
He was grateful that you didnât.Â
Sirius eventually proposed to you â though beg was likely a more appropriate definition.
âWe should get married.â He had said to you late one night as he came back to the bedroom after putting Draco down.Â
You lowered your book into your lap as you considered him. âI beg your pardon?â
âWe should get married.â He repeated plainly.
Your lip threatened to quirk into a smirk, but you kept your face blank. âAnd why should we get married?â
Sirius guffawed at you. âUhm, maybe because weâre in love? And Iâm the best and would be the best husband?â
You continued to stare at him.
âWhy shouldnât we get married?â He asked, now beginning to panic.
âI never said we shouldnât.â
âThen why wonât you marry me?â He shrilled as he moved to kneel at the end of the bed.
âYouâre the first thought in my mind when I wake up in the morning and my last thought at night before I fall asleep. Fuck, you make up the majority of my dreams too. Did you know that? Did you know that I go to the Ministry and count down the minutes until I get to see you again? Did you know that when youâre at work, I spend my time thinking about what youâre doing, who youâre talking to, what theyâre saying to you and you to them? And not in a stalkery way, I swear. But I just think youâre the coolest fucking person ever and Iâm jealous of everyone who gets to listen to you speak when Iâm stuck at home or at work. And I watch you with Draco -our sweet boy - and our Godson and the other children and I get fucking giddy thinking that I get to spend the rest of my days with a woman so lovely. So, marry me. Marry me, damnit!â
It was a battle to keep your face straight but by the absolute grace of God you did before saying âSiri, babe, youâre coming off a little desperate.â
There was a brief pause before you got a âyou cheeky little minxâ and 45 seconds of tickling which turned into kissing which turned into touching which turned into so much more.
You were sticky and satisfied as you both caught your breath, still intertwined with one another when you said, âI will.â
âHm?â
âI will.â You repeated as you leaned onto your elbow so you could look him in the eyes. âIâll marry you. Marry me.â
Sirius stared at you in awe before pulling you down into his embrace for a searing kiss which once again turned into so much more.Â
And you guys did. Marry each other, that is. It was a beautiful spring day on the grounds of Potter Manor with only your closest family and friends. It was perhaps a touch smaller than what either you or Sirius grew up picturing your wedding to be, but it was so much better than either of you could have ever imagined.
â...I thank my lucky stars every day that I get to love such a wonderful woman. Thereâs not one person in this world who deserves to know the likes of you, me least of all, but will do everything I can to ensure I get to keep what little light youâre willing to share with me forever. I have already loved you in sickness and in health, for rich or for poor, and in life and in death. There is not one planet in any universe, nor a timeline that exists where my love for you does not. I vow to you that you will never spend a day in this life not being loved by me. Wherever you go, I go; in this life and the next.â Sirius said through his tears.Â
With a smile you began your own vows. âSirius, I have had the absolute pleasure of getting to witness you become the man you are today. It wasnât always easy or pretty, but I have seen you through it all; the good, the bad, the really bad, and the ugly. And I have loved you through all of it. As I laid dying, I told James that I didnât regret a single moment of this life with you, and that is still true today. Every moment, all the blood, sweat, and tears, brought us here today - and I would still do all of it again if it meant getting to stand here today by your side. I made a vow that I would find you in our next life and I would love you there too. Well, here I am. I found you. I will always find you.â
Lily, Marlene, and Alice stood by your side, and James, Remus, and Regulus stood by Siriusâ as your magic was bound together, and you were pronounced husband and wife.
Sirius hung the framed parchment that Remus had found in the wooded area where he first met Regulus in his office. The note symbolized your dedication to him, to your friends and family, and your unyielding perseverance. The parchment was later joined by your wedding pictures, drawings that he and Harry had painted back in Grimmauld place as well as pictures Harry and Draco had given him since, and the first ever check he received for his investment in A Marauderâs Map to Books.Â
You loved working at Moonyâs bookstore; everyday felt like getting to hang out with your best friends even though you pretty much lived with them as well. It was nice to see Remus and Regulus in a setting outside of the parental/guardian role youâd all taken on following the war. You were surprised at first (though you supposed you should have known better) that Remus and Regulus worked really well together â Regulusâ uptight and serious façade was well balanced with Remusâ laidback and jovial personality. Regulus would handle the more difficult customers whilst Remus made sure every customer who came in felt welcome. Things often fell by the wayside or got overlooked when Remus was away due to the moons, and Regulus was quick to pick up the slack. Regulus would often get too caught up in work and forget to stay fed or hydrated, which Remus counteracted by briskly walking past Regulus and placing biscuits and cups of tea brewed exactly to Regulusâ liking before he could refuse. If you noticed Regulusâ cheeks tinge peak and a shy smile grace his lips â you didnât mention it.Â
Draco grew to be a very happy child; you and Sirius couldnât help but feel a sense of pride every time that boy giggled or laughed. You kept your word and left the Malfoy vaults untouched save twice a year when Narcissa would purchase a gift for Draco on June 5th and December 25th.Â
He was such a good son and an even better big brother.Â
Draco was the most jealous of Harry when Harry became a big brother to his sister Jasmine Potter. It was hard not to chuckle at how proud the four-and-a-half-year-old was as he bragged about being the âbestest big brotherâ and watching Draco skulk around the house.Â
âI could be a big brother! Really, I could. Iâd be so nice and gentle, and I would share all my toys!â He told you and Sirius solemnly as you tucked him in to bed. You assured him he would indeed be a wonderful big brother, but not to worry about it too much as you were sure Lily and James could use two big brothers for their newest addition.Â
You both gave him kisses goodnight and closed the door behind you. Youâd hardly made it two steps from the door before your husband had you pushed up against the wall.Â
âI could be a really good daddy too, you know?â He whispered into your neck before starting to suck on your pulse point.
You couldnât stifle the moan that escaped your lips. âAre you trying to tell me something?âÂ
Sirius kissed his way back up your jaw before slotting his lips against yours. âPerhaps we should give the kid what he wants.â He managed between kisses.
You chuckled.
âHe gets everything he wants already, Siri.â You whispered back as you pulled his body flush with yours.
âWhat about me, hm?â
You pulled your head back to search his face. âDo you want another baby, Sirius?â
Siriusâ pupils seemed to blow wide at the sentiment. âI donât so much want a baby as I want your baby, my love.â He whispered reverently.
Your restraint snapped and you launched yourself at him. He caught you as your legs wrapped around his waist and your arms around his neck, carrying you down the hall to your bedroom. Â
Approximately ten months later you gave birth to your daughter Aurora Black.
September 1st, Kings Cross Station
âMerlinâs saggy balls, how do you â for fuck saâ oh, got it!â Sirius could be heard behind you as he fought with the pram.Â
âWould you watch your mouth?â Lily muttered.
âYeah Pads, watch your fuckinâ mouth!â James loudly announced causing other parents to look over at the absolute freak show that was the Potter & Black familyâs stepping onto Platform 9 ž.
âSorry.â You offered with a quiet smile to a particularly perturbed looking couple as they grabbed their smarmy looking child and ushered him away from the likes of you. âWankers.â You muttered as they hobbled off.
âWhoâs a wanker, mum?â Draco asked as he slid up beside you. The rotten child knew he wasnât supposed to use such language but couldnât pass the chance at getting to repeat your nasty comment.
âPresently, itâs you.â You commented while teasingly narrowing your eyes at him.Â
âOi, leave your poor mum alone! Youâre buggering off to Hogwarts and leaving her with the likes of me for the next ten months.â Sirius said as he (finally) made his way to you with the pram in tow. The three-year-old twins seemed none the wiser that they just nearly got folded into the damned thing and thrown onto the tracks in a fit of rage.Â
âMy deepest condolences during this trying time.â Draco offered you severely.
Sirius scoffed and you laughed as you pulled him into an embrace. You were waiting for the day he pushed you away because hugging your mom goodbye in front of your friends was embarrassing. But today, you relished in the feeling of your first child letting you hold him tight.
âIâm so proud of you, Draco.â You murmured into his platinum hair.
âThank you, mum.â He responded quietly.Â
âDraco! Harry! Over here!â The sound of Hermione Granger interrupted your hug as Draco turned to wave at his friends.Â
âBe good kid, okay? Look out for your sister?â Sirius asked as he pulled Draco into his own embrace.
ââCourse, dad. Iâm not new here.â He teased as he ruffled Auroraâs hair.
âDraaaccoooo...â She whined in response.
âGo see âMione.â You ordered Draco with one last side hug. Harry and Draco swapped parents and siblings to give their respective goodbyes before heading off to catch up with their friends.Â
âAre you ready, Rory?â Jasmine Potter asked your daughter kindly. She was a year above Aurora and was very excited to get the chance to show her younger cousin around the castle.Â
Your daughter looked between her cousin and her parents before Sirius spoke up. âJazz, do you mind giving us a minute?â He asked his Goddaughter. Â
Jasmine turned to talk to James and Lily who were busy entertaining Posie and Lyra as you and Sirius bent down to talk to Aurora.
âWhatâs on your mind, love?â You asked your daughter gently.
Your heart welled as Auroraâs eyes turned glassy.
âIâm not ready.â
Sirius made a cooing sound as he wiped the tears from under her lash line. âWhat are you most worried about, my little star?â
Aurora sniffled miserably. âWhat if Iâm sorted into the wrong house?â
You and Sirius couldnât help but rear your head at the comment. Out of all the things you thought would be worrying your daughter on her first day of boarding school, which house she got sorted into was not it.
âRory, thatâs the exciting part baby.â You tried as you rubbed her arm consolingly.
âI get it, Ro, I was worried about which house I was going to be sorted into as well.â Sirius commented.
Aurora rubbed a fist against her eye as she turned to consider her father. âReally?â
Sirius nodded solemnly. âReally. You see, I came from a long line of proud Slytherins. I was supposed to get sorted into that house too, because I was supposed to be just like them. But I couldnât be like them, I could only be like me. So, I was sorted in Gryffindor, even though my family didnât like it.âÂ
âDid you get in trouble?â
Sirius nodded sadly. âI did.â
âBut Ro, you know that no matter what house you get sorted into, me and daddy are going to be so, so, so proud of you. And weâll be proud of you because youâre you, not because you were sorted into Ravenclaw or Gryffindor or Hufflepuff or Slytherin.â You added with a soft smile.
Aurora seemed to consider this. âWell, Harry and Jazzy are in Gryffindor, and Draco is in Slytherin. Iâd like to be in one of those I think.â
You nodded at her, but it was Sirius who answered.
âThatâd be pretty cool, huh? But listen, I met the most fantastic people in my house even though I knew no one in it when I first got sorted. Uncle Prongs and Uncle Moony were my dormmates for seven years and look at us now! Completely co-dependent and still living together.â
âWhat is co-dependent?â Aurora asked with furrowed brows.
âNot important. What Iâm trying to say is, Rory, you are going to give that hat a run for its money, you know why?â Sirius asked.
Aurora shook her head.
âBecause you are your motherâs daughter. And she is the the most loyal, the most cunning, the bravest and the smartest person I know. Youâve been raised by the most spectacular person, and any one of those houses will be lucky to have you. Got it?â
You watched as Rory took a deep breath and squared her shoulders before offering her dad a solid nod.
âAtta girl!â He said as he enveloped her in a hug and kissed her head. âYou show that sorting hat whoâs boss.âÂ
Aurora chuckled as she moved to hug you.
âIâm so proud of you, my love.â You said into her hair. She tightened her hold on you before letting go and stepping back.
âI think weâre ready for you, Jazzy.â You called, and the older girl came and took Auroraâs hand as they headed towards Draco and Harry to board the train.
James and Sirius wolf whistled and hollered, waving frantically as they watched the kids walk away. Hermione, Harry and Draco chuckled while Neville and Ron turned beat red at the attention.
You propped Lyra on your hip and the two of you continued to wave as the train pulled away. None of you stopped waving until you couldnât see your babies anymore.
A sob tore its way through James, and you looked over to see Lily making alarmed eye contact with you as she awkwardly patted his arm and he and Sirius leaned into each other.
âFirst time?â An older woman asked as she went to walk past you.
âNoâ was yours and Lilyâs chorused response as you peeled your husband away from his best mate and moved him toward the pram where your youngest two sat forgotten.Â
âLord, is it going to be this bad every time we send one of the kids off the first time?â
âItâll be worse!â Sirius cried emphatically as he fell into your arms, basically crushing poor Lyra who was still sat on your hip. You looked over to Lily hoping for help only to see her in a similar predicament.Â
âSirius Black, at this rate our youngest three wonât ever want to come back to Kings Cross Station.â You muttered as you moved Lyra to your other hip so you could support your husbandâs weight.
âGood! Then theyâll never leave me!âÂ
Your heart twinged as you patted Siriusâ back.
âSiri, look at me.âÂ
For a moment you thought he might refuse, but he unfolded himself slowly and stood to look at you.Â
âThis is what we fought for, my love.â You said as you caressed his cheek. âSo that our babies could go to Hogwarts and learn and be children and be free and be safe.â
âI still hate it.â
You laughed at his petulance. âMe too, actually. Do you think Hogwarts is hiring? What if we all just move there?â
âGreat idea, Vix!â James cheered from beside you, eyes rimmed and cheeks glistening. âLily flower could work in the infirmary, Padfoot could teach astronomy, you could teach muggle studies, I could teach flying, Moony could teach defence against the dark arts and Regulus could teach potions! Itâs perfect!â
Though you had to admit this plan of Jamesâ actually sounded pretty perfect, your attention turned to little Posie falling asleep in Lilyâs arms.Â
âWhy donât we discuss this more once we get these kiddos down for a nap, hm?â
Sirius found you later sitting in the sunroom with a book in hand. He thought you made the prettiest picture sitting in the soft sun filtering through the leaves of the trees outside, plants surrounding you with your nose buried in a book. So, he took a picture.Â
âI wasnât ready!â You whined with a smile on your face.
âYouâre always ready.â He said as he pressed a kiss to your lips. âIâm sorry I was such a mess at the train station today.â He said as he lifted your legs off the loveseat to sit down and replace them atop his lap.
âYou donât have to apologize, Siri.â You said as you tapped him with your book.Â
âIâm supposed to be the one taking care of you.â He commented, his gaze seemed far away as he watched the branches dance in the September breeze.
âYou can do that tomorrow.â You whispered back.
A smile graced his face before he turned to look at you. âI love you; did you know? I donât think I say it enough, but I do; I love you.â
He punctuated his sentence with three loving squeezes of the fat of your thigh.
âSirius. Every breath I take means âI love youâ.â You responded and sealed it with a kiss.Â
You got an owl from Draco and Aurora later that night.
Aurora was a hat stall.
She was also sorted into the same house as her mum.
Thank you so much for reading! Can't get enough? Check out these CBBH themed one shots, or, feel free to request a one-shot from your faves in this universe!
#marauders era#marauders au#marauders fanfiction#sirius black#sirius black x reader#sirius black x you#sirius black fic#marauders x reader#first wizarding war#first wizarding war fanfic#reader insert#escapism#self insert#canon divergence#hurt/comfort#sirius black hurt/comfort#sirius black one shot#sirius black blurb#sirius black ficlet
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Bubblegum Pink
fandom: harry potter
pairing: tom riddle x bimbo!reader
description: Tom Riddle hates your guts. But he can use your stupidity to his own advantage.
word count: 4,4k
warnings!: rough sex, hate fuck, verbal humiliation, face slapping, face fucking, rape/non-con, possessive!tom riddle, dominant!tom riddle, dumb!reader, manhandling, coquette!reader, the color pink, extremely dubious consent, love potion, attempted rape, praise kink.
âââââââŕźşâĄŕźťďż˝ďż˝ďż˝âââââ⎠bubblegum pink â°ââââââŕźşâĄŕźťâââââââŻ
Tom Riddle hated everything about you. Especially your astounding stupidity that seemed to have no bounds. He was staring at you while trying to study at the library where a few tables seated with students separated you from him. He shouldâve been studying, he had a lot of assignments to work ahead on, but instead, here were you, for no other reason but do distract him. Tom had no idea why you even came, itâs not like you were going to learn anything. You were the weakling in your year, and he had no idea how you managed to pass all the classes enough to get to Seventh Year. Whenever professors asked you a question in class, you only blinked at them in confusion, and instead of answering you chewed on that ridiculous bubble gum that was always in your mouth. Tom had never tasted it and he had no intention to indulge in muggle things like that, not only because it reminded him of you, but because wanted to separate himself from mudbloods like you as well as he could.
Thatâs what you were â a mudblood. That was enough of a reason to hate you. But of course, as everything with you, being a dumb mudblood was not the only sin of yours. He hated your hair, your clothes, your bubbly personality, your Hufflepuff house, that silly pink bubble gum always making you slur your words. Tom could swear you never did any of the schoolwork yourself, you had some smart friends who were always there to help you out. Why would anyone want to be your friend was also a mystery to him.
You were incredibly annoying. Even now, at the library where everyone was supposed to be working you were whispering something into your Hufflepuff best friendâs ear, then laughing when he whispered something back. Your laugh was quiet and barely audible, but he was looking at you, and he knew you were laughing, he saw the way your breasts wiggled under your uniform shirt. He sneered at the sight, his eyes involuntarily lingering on the rest of your body, starting with those plump breasts that the buttons of your shirt seemed to barely hold up, moving to your scandalously short uniform skirtâTom had no idea why none of the professors ever pointed out to you that dressing like a whore was inappropriateâending with your light pink tights and hot pink high heels. The only thing you werenât that stupid about was the dress code â you knew it and still decided to break the rules every day. Wearing pink wasnât prohibited, as werenât high heels or that childish pink bow that held your hair away from your face, but it didnât go well with your Hufflepuff-yellow tie or scarf, and yet you didnât seem to care. You loved pink. You were a stupid little mudblood who wore pink and chewed bubble gum and made him crazy mad. He hated you for that too. He felt his jaw clench to the point of breaking when you leaned into the friend you came here with to whisper something in his ear too, and as you did, the first button of your shirt popped open.
Tom stood up, his chair scraping the ground. He gathered his books and scrolls in record speed. He passed your table as he found his way to the exit, and when you saw him, you beamed up at him as if youâve never been happier to see anyone else. You were so unbearably nice to everyone, greeting and helping everyone out and thanking for every little thing someone did for you. It was only a matter of time before someone decided to exploit that mix of kind and dumb that you unfortunately were an embodiment of. Your lush body and skimpy fashion were of no help to your cause.
âHi, Tom!â you cheered, eyes going wide, teeth grinding on that sodding bubble gum. Your exclamation was so loud that the four people at your table and a few behind you tried to shush you, but you didnât seem to realize you did something wrong â you probably didnât even know you were at the library, and thatâs how you got here.
Trying to gather himself when all he wished was to curse that foolish smile off your face, Tom answered calmly, âHello.â He couldnât show how much he hated you, he couldnât cause any suspicion, so he treated you just like everybody else â politely, indifferently.
Your smile widened even moreâwas that possible?âwhen he answered your greeting.
He was a lot of things, but indifferent when it came to you was not one of them.
The quidditch game was supposed to start in fifteen minutes, and you had lost your wand.
It was an accident, you didnât mean to lose it, you were walking to the quidditch stadium, crossing the bridge, when a small bowtruckle caught your attention. You stopped, ran to the side of the bridge, and beamed at the tiny green creature. It looked almost the same as the spring grass around it, but you were good at spotting the little things, at least thatâs what you thought about yourself, so when you saw this bowtruckle, you couldnât help but greet it, âHey, little guy, what are you doing down there?â
You thought it might want to climb up, but it was too small, so you decided the best thing to do was to use your wand and pull it up. You took out your wand, pointed it at the bowtruckle⌠and your wand fell! You panicked, ran down the bridge to the spot where you saw your wand fall wand and started searching for it. But neither your wand nor the bowtruckle were anywhere to be seenâŚ
None other than Tom Riddle found you on your knees on the grass, desperately trying to find your wand. You didnât hear him come, so when he said, âWhat are you doing here? Arenât you supposed to be at the game?â you gasped, flinching, and turned around to see him right behind you. His gaze was dark and focused on where you were kneeling. You smiled at him, as you always did, although this time a little nervously, turning your full body to him and pulling your pink skirt down that had ridden up in the search for your only tool for magic. âI lost my wand,â you said.
He shook his head, as if it was hard to believe something like that couldâve happened to a wizard, although everyone who were your friends knew this wasnât unusual. You saw the corners of his lips lift into a crooked smile. âAnd how did you manage that, huh?â he asked.
You explained to him what had happened. Tom chuckled when you finished telling that story, and something dark in his voice, something you couldnât name and would never even dare toâsomething in that laughter made you shiver.
âIt fell somewhere hereâŚâ you mumbled, patting the grass that was still damp from the morning dew.
Without a warning, Tom grabbed your forearm and pulled you to your feet, saying, âAccio wand,â as your wand came flying to his hand from under the bridge you lost it on.
You sighed in relief, then giggled, reaching out for your wand in Tomâs hand. âOh, thank you⌠I lost it for goodâŚâ
But when you tried to take your wand, Tom pulled it away. Your frowned in confusion. He leaned into you, all the while keeping your wand at a distance you couldnât reach, and whispered, his dark eyes piercing through you, âAnd what will you give me in return for your wand?â he demanded.
You blinked. âWhatever you wantâŚâ
Something glinted in his eyes, the sharp edges of his face grew severe. Then he chuckled again. âA very dangerous suggestion, little one.â
You frowned again, blinking a few times. âIâm not little,â you said. âWeâre the same age.â
Instead of answering, Tom put your wand in your unsteady hand and stepped away, as if only now composing himself. Whatever confusion you felt evaporated, and you joyfully smiled at him again. âThanks!â
He looked your outfit up and down again now that you were standing at full height. In your own opinion, your pink outfit today was really nice â since it was the weekend, you could take more freedom in your fashion. Today you decided to wear a glittery crop top with straps and a short velvet mini skirt with very high heels, but you were short so even they didnât help your height case with Tom standing right next to you.
âYouâre going to wear that to the game?â he asked, cocking one eyebrow.
You grinned at him, âYes!â turning around to show off all angles, even though you had a feeling he had already seen more than enough while you were on your knees. âDo you like it?â
A muscle twitched in his jaw. He didnât answer your question.
âYou know that the stadium will be full of boys â both fans and players alike?â he asked.
You blinked. âUhm, I guess so⌠There will be both boys and girlsâŚâ you trailed off.
âAnd you donât think your clothes are too provocative for that occasion?â
You frowned. âI think theyâre niceâŚâ
He stared at you, then chuckled again. âOf course, I forgot who I was talking to. Yes, theyâre nice.â
His admiration brightened your mood immediately, putting back the smile on your face. âAre you going to the game too?â
Tom once again ignored your question, his eyes never leaving your body and your face. But now he looked around as if searching for someone. âWhy are you here all alone?â he asked. âWhere are your friends? Itâs not safe for you to be walking around all by yourself, little one. Someone might⌠get the wrong idea.â
You blinked, but decided to ignore the name he called you. He probably called every girl that, to be nice, the same way you smiled and helped everyone. This time he was the one who helped you.
âOh, Hogwarts is the safest place in the world!â you said. âNothing bad could happen to me here.â
A strange smile adorned Tomâs face. He seemed to be thinking something through.
âOh, I got an idea!â you exclaimed. âWe can go to the game together!â
As a real gentleman, Tom accompanied you to the game while you were trying to understand the meaning behind his strange words.
There was a party at the Slytherin common room, and your best friend dragged you there, not that you had any objectionsâyou loved dressing up, and this was the perfect chance to do so. You opted out for a bubble pink colored dress with short sleeves, deep V shape neckline and flowy short skirt. Underneath you added baby pink tights with decorative bows on top. Your outfit wouldnât be finished without another pair of bows in your hair that held up two ponytails and glittery pointed pumps.
These pumps were very high heeled, and you kind of regretted putting them on because now you were sitting on a green velvet sofa next to a Slytherin boy who claimed to be your friendâs friend and gave you a second drink of the nightâ and you knew youâd fall if you tried to stand up; whatever was in that first drink mustâve been strong because your head was already dizzy and everything around you seemed blurry.
âHey, do you see my friend that I came here with?â you asked the Slytherin boy who had put his arm over your shoulders while you tried not to vomit. You were chewing your gum, and it made the dizzying feeling less intense. âIâm afraid heâll have to carry me back to the Hufflepuff common room⌠I donât think I can stand upâŚâ
There were more guys sitting all around you and one more beside you on the sofa, and they all laughed. You giggled with them. It was funny how drunk you got so fast.
âI can take you to the common room,â the Slytherin boy who gave you the drinks said.
You smiled. âReally? That would be great! I really donât want to bother my friend, he always has to carry me when I get too drunkâŚâ you trailed off.
The boy leaned closer to you. You felt his breath on your lips. âSure, love, but first, finish your drink.â
You looked down at the cup in your hands. You didnât want to finish it, you were afraid to vomit all over the boy, but he was so nice to get you a second drink, you didnât want it to go to waste, so you started slowly sipping on it.
The Slytherin boy shifted in his seat, taking a vial of pink liquid out of his pocket. You eyed it as he inquired, âYou know what this is, love?â You shook your head, which made you even more dizzy. âThis is a potion that can make you feel really good.â You frowned. âI can put it in your drink, and if you drink it, itâll make you feel as light as a feather. See? Itâs pink, love. You like, pink, donât you?â Your eyes lit up at the word pink. The potion was beautiful. It couldnât be poison, and it looked like it would taste delicious.
You chewed on your gum and nodded. The boys around you laughed. The boy that talked you into this opened the vial of the potion and poured its contents into your cup. He reached out his hand to your face then, his thumb brushing over your lower lip that had puckered out.
âDrink up, love. Youâll feel so good, I promise.â
You looked down at the drink that now turned a bit pink. You were ready to drink it because you wanted to feel very good, but before the edge of the cup touched your lips, someone grabbed your hand, forcing you to spill the drink on the carpet. That same someone pulled you up from the sofa. You smiled when you saw Tomâs face. You were always happy to see him, but you were even happier that he was at the same party as you were.
âHi, Tom!â you said.
He wasnât looking at you, though. He was gripping your forearm to the point of pain, but his darkened eyes were on the boy who gave you the drink.
âAre you fucking crazy, Avery?â Tom spat at the boy whose eyes had slightly widened, but he soon regained his composure.
âWhatâd you mean? Itâs all consensual. She wanted it,â he said.
âYou think youâre so funny?â Tom said. âWill it still be funny if I tell the headmaster you tried to feed love potion to one of your classmates?â
You frowned, trying to blink away the film of blurriness that was distorting your vision. You had no idea what was going on.
The Slytherin boy sneered, cackling, âFuck, man, have this stupid bitch all to yourself if you want to.â
The other boys around laughed, echoing the first one.
Tomâs grip on your arm tightened as he dragged through the sea of bodies, lights, and music, and up the stairs to the boysâ dormitory. He let you go only when he opened the door to the bedroom with only one bed. He pushed you inside and closed the door behind. You looked around, taking in the dark gray and green interior. You confusedly remembered that Tom was a prefect. Prefects had separate rooms. This one mustâve been his.
âHey, Tom, why did you bring me hereââ you began.
When he turned to you, the anger was gone from his face; he chuckled darkly, shaking his head to himself.
âYouâre a real stupid bitch, do you know that?â he said. âDo you have even the slightest idea how fucking dumb you are?â
You flinched, hugging your shaky arms around yourself. There were marks of Tomâs fingers on the forearm he grabbed.
âWhy are you calling me that?â you whispered.
He stepped closer, towering over you. âBecause you are. Do you know what those guys wouldâve done to you after you took that potion?â
You swallowed, chewing on your gum. âThe potion wouldâve made me feel good.â
He laughed again, just like those boys in the common room. âThat was a love potion, you stupid girl. They wouldâve raped you, gang fucked you on that very carpet and you wouldâve liked it because you wouldnât know how to hate it!â he shouted through gritted teeth.
âNoâŚâ you said quietly, feeling tears prickle in your eyes.
âYes, Y/N, they wouldâve hurt you! And youâre fucking crying because I saved you from them?â You shook your head, tears running down your cheeks as you stared at the ground. Tom grabbed your chin, forcing you to look up at him. âYouâre so fucking nice to everyone but not everyone is that nice, Y/N.â
You sniffled. âHe was nice to meâŚâ
Tom laughed. âBecause he wanted to fuck you.â
Your eyes widened. âButâyouâre nice to me, TomâŚâ
He leaned in. You felt his hot breath ghost over your lips. âMaybe because I want to fuck your stupid brains out too.â
He didnât give you enough time to think over his words as his lips crushed to yours. His tongue invaded your mouth as his hands roamed over your body. His tongue fished out the bubble gum out of your mouth, transferring it to his. His roaming hand grabbed your hair by one of the bow-tied ponytails as he ripped your face off himself. He looked down at you as you breathed heavily from his attack on your mouth. His half-lidded gaze focused on you as he chewed your gum once, twice, then spat it out on the floor beside you. He pulled your ponytail back, the burning pain in your scalp making you stumble back as he walked into you until you reached the edge of his bed and fell on top of it.
âYou think those guys were laughing with you, Y/N? You think they liked your jokes? No, they were laughing at you, because youâre so fucking stupid itâs ridiculous.â
You sobbed, more tears falling from your eyes, but he didnât stop.
âBut they also wanted to wet their dicks in all your holes, to rip off these slutty clothesââ
He illustrated his words with actions when grabbed the top of your dress and ripped it in half, exposing your breasts and forcing a gasp out of you. Only the skirt was left in one piece. His eyes focused on your breasts as he twisted your nipples painfully, making you sob.
âShh, donât cry, little one,â he said quietly, even softly, as he fondled your breasts pushing you to lie down on the bed with his body on top of you. âThose guys wouldâve taken you tonight one by one. But they donât deserve you to be nice to them. Only I do.â
He took your torn dress off you in one swift move and now you were half-naked before him. Diverting his attention from your breasts, which made you feel the cold air of the room and shiver from it, Tom grabbed one of your ponytails while he unbuckled his belt and undid his trousers with the other.
Your eyes widened when he freed his cock. Your throat went dry at the sight of it, hard and pulsing, the head of it angry red, glistening with precum. Tom grinned at you, guiding the head of his cock to your lips and forcing your head forward. âOpen that stupid mouth of yours,â he commanded quietly.
You did as he said, you wanted to taste him after all. The moment your mouth open, he thrust the full length of his cock past your lips until it reached your throat, making you gag. He grabbed the other ponytail with his free hand and controlled the movements of your head on his cock, bobbing it up and down ruthlessly. More tears ran down your cheeks, and you didnât know if they were from the crying, from the pressure in your throat or the lack of air.
âFuck, do you have any idea how many times Iâve wanted to stuff my cock in your mouth whenever something stupid came out of it? Just to shut you up, little one?â You didnât answer, only gagged as he rhythmically fucked your throat.
Tom was going to say something else but got too overwhelmed. A few more thrusts, and he finally pulled out of your throat. You gasped, trying to catch your breath, as the hands that still held your ponytail took out the bows out of it. Your hair fell free on your shoulders.
You swallowed when Tom pushed at your shoulders until you lay flat on your back.
âTom, pleaseââ you whispered.
âShh,â Tom silenced you, ripping off your tights. âGetting fucked by me is all that youâre good for.â
You were wearing only your bright pink knickers. When he was them, he stopped the animalistic tearing of your clothes. He touched your privates through the fabric of your knickers softly, even tenderly. Then he slid them off down your legs unhurriedly, hissing at the sight of your exposed pussy. Tom brushed his fingers over your folds, and his cold touch to your burning core made you whimper.
âFucking pinkâŚâ he hissed through his teeth, gathering your arousal on his fingers. His eyes briefly found your face. You felt blush crawl up your flesh. âDo you have any idea how many times I fantasized of bending you over and stuffing your pussy with my cock? Making you scream my name?â He looked down at your core, fingers suddenly rubbing violent circles over your puckered clit and the sensitive flesh of nerves around it. You whimpered, flinching under him from the overwhelming stimulation.
He pulled back slightly and positioned his cock at your entrance and grabbed a fistful of your hair, stretching your upper body closer to him, putting you into an unnatural position.
âNo, Tom, youâre too bigââ you cried.
He slapped your cheek, silencing you abruptly with unexpected violence. No one had ever hit you before. No one ever handled your body like this, no one ever caused you pain this way. Your cheek was burning.
âQuiet,â Tom commanded, squeezing your cheeks together, inducing more painful tears.
He watched your expression. âYouâre gonna be a good little slut for me and take it, right?â
You sobbed. âPleaseââ
He slapped the other side of your face, and you went silent, choking on silent whimpers. âYou want me to slap your face, is that how to shut you up?â he inquired, tugging at your hair painfully. âYouâll feel good, little one. Eventually. I promise.â
He thrust his cock inside of you in one go. His other hand held your left leg wide open while he rutted into you mercilessly. Your eyes fluttered shut as liquid heat coursed through your body.
âYouâre so fucking wetâŚâ he gritted through his teeth. âGripping me like viceâŚâ
You whimpered when he pulled at your hair as he used your body any way he wanted. The pain and the pleasure mixed inside of you and made a concoction that forced your entire body to shudder. All you could do was close your eyes, let the tears run free and whimper when his cock reached that sensitive point deep in your womb.
That fog caused by all the overwhelming sensations was briefly interrupted by another chuckle coming from Tom. âThatâs what you needed, wasnât it, little slut? You needed me to fuck your stupid brains out, thatâs how to shut you up, huh?â
You didnât answer, only bit your lower lip. You were scared to speak in case he decided to slap your for it again. Your teeth nipped at your own lip from the movement of Tomâs relentless fucking.
âTomâŚâ you whimpered.
He groaned at that.
You felt him let go of your hair, and when you opened your eyes, you saw and felt him lean into you until his body practically dipped you into the mattress. He grabbed your neck and began choking you. âAgain. Say my name again,â he demanded, speaking into your open mouth.
âTomâŚ. Tom⌠TomâŚâ you kept repeating even when it was hard to speak. You had to choose between saying his name and breathing air. You chose the first one.
The new angle made your eyes water as he picked up his pace.
âYou look at me when I fuck you, Y/N,â he groaned. Something deep inside you was uncurling, you felt it, and in that moment, you couldâve told him anything if only that meant he wouldnât stop what he was doing. You wanted to nod frantically but his grip on your throat was too harsh. Luckily, he got the message. âGood girl,â he praised for the first time. âTaking my cock so well⌠No one else gets to fuck your pussy, understood? No one else gets to see you like thisâŚâ
âYes, Tom, yesâŚâ you mumbled.
He kissed you again, no, devoured you whole. His kiss was punishing. He bit your lips, your tongue, making you taste your own blood.
When he let you go, you whimpered. âIâm gonna⌠Iâm gonnaâŚâ
âYouâre going to come, huh? Go on, come all over my cock, little oneâŚâ
When you were at the precipice of a climax, he slapped your face again, four times, on both cheeks. The blinding white pain unlocked whatever was hidden inside you. You came, screaming and thrashing under him as he fucked you through your orgasm with his jaw tense as he tried to keep himself at bay a few more seconds. His hips collided with yours even after you came, and soon you felt his hot seed spill inside of you. Tomâs movements slowed and he kissed your forehead, pulling his cock out of you but still holding you down by your throat.
âYouâre mine now, Y/N,â he claimed. âIâm going to fuck you in my bed every single night. And every single morning youâll go from class to class with my come spilling out of you. And if I see you talking to any other guys, even if itâs that Hufflepuff best friend of yours, Iâll fucking kill them, is that clear?â
A lot of things were hard for you to understand, a lot of concepts needed additional explanation to you, but right now, one thing was clear as day: Tom wasnât kidding. He wouldnât take no for an answer.
âYes, TomâŚâ you said.
He grinned, covering your body with his, and gifted you another bruising kiss for your obedience.
âââââââŕźşâĄŕźťââââââ⎠the end â°ââââââŕźşâĄŕźťâââââââŻ
#tom riddle fanfiction#tom riddle x reader#ao3#fanfic#fanfiction#fanart#archive of our own#harry potter fanfiction#tom riddle#tom riddle x y/n#tom riddle x you#writing#smut#hp smut
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Spells from the Heart
Pairing: Tom Riddle x Fem!Muggle!Reader
Includes: mentions of war, memory loss, stalking, reader is naive, goes from third person to second, story is in Tom's p.o.v.
Word count: 1.2k
Summary: You come across something you shouldn't have, and Tom decides to keep you.
Passing through the war-wrecked streets of London, Tom made his way to his usual hiding spot where he could perform magic without being discovered.
It amused him to call it a hiding spot, because it was in fact a field, though â in all fairness â it was in the middle of the woods.
As Tom finally reached his destination, the smell of Earth surrounded him. He shut his eyes â a rare moment of vulnerability â and took in a deep breath, taking in the wet scent of soil and flowers with him.
He dropped his worn down satchel and discarded his coat on the ground. He sat atop his dark coat and grabbed an old book out of his bag. It was a book of spells that he was able to convince the Hogwarts librarian to let him borrow over summer break.
He scanned through the contents of the book, trying to decide on the first spell he would like to practice.
As a small bunny came into sight, Tom selected Vera Verto.
He stood up on his two feet and grasped his wand. He pointed it at the unsuspecting creature and whispered, âVare-ah vore-toe,â pronouncing it as was written in the book.
Before his own two eyes, the bunny went from a living being to a goblet of water. Pride bubbled in Tomâs chest.
As he was about to mutter a spell to reverse it, a gasp from behind stopped him.
Clutching his wand, Tom turned around to find a girl around his age standing in shock from what sheâd just witnessed. Like sheâd come to her senses, she scrambled into a run.
Fortunately for Tom â but unfortunate for her â he was able to point his wand at her and yelled, âKahr-pay ruh-track-tum.â
The girl was pulled towards Tom's chest, and with a grunt he wrapped an arm around her waist. She clawed at his arm like a feral animal and he had the urge to ask her to stop it.
With his free hand, Tom pointed his wand at the stranger again. âObliviate,â passed through his lips and instantly her body went limp. He dropped her onto the damp grass.
Tom wasnât sure when her consciousness would resurface, so he made quick work in putting his coat and satchel back on and stuffing his wand back in his pocket.
Before leaving, Tom looked down at the girl. Hair covered her face and Tom reached down to move it away. He noted that she was quite pretty.Â
After being caught using magic, Tom hadnât visited the fields in a few days. But, his fingers twitched to grab onto his wand. To point it at something and mutter a spell. The children at Woolâs Orphanage got on Tomâs, but of course he couldnât punish them for it like when he was a child.
Done with being reminded of his predicament, Tom finally decided to go on a walk. It led him to the edge of the woods anyways.
He couldnât help but think of you as he walked. He hadnât used a spell on a muggle for so long, and doing so left behind a certain thrill.
Tom stopped walking and squinted. A little ways away from him, he caught sight of a house. It was hidden behind several large trees, casting a darkness upon it and hiding it from view.
As Tom got nearer to one of the windows, he saw a glimpse of someone. You.
He ducked under the window, and thought of how much of a fool he must have looked. He certainly felt like one.
The walls were rather thin, Tom learned as he listened to her hum. He recognized the tune. âI Donât Want to Set the World on Fire.â At times the song would play on the small radio during dinner time.
A few moments passed. In those few moments, Tom realized that you were home alone. You looked to be Tomâs age, and if he was right, that meant your parents werenât home.
Tom walked up the steps to your front door and knocked. The humming stopped and Tom listened to the sound of hurried footsteps.
The door creaked open. You looked up at Tom with wide eyes. He supposed you were surprised. It was unlikely that many people visited your family much.
âExcuse me, Miss. If itâs no bother, I was hoping you could help me? Iâve seemed to have gotten lost.â
Your face relaxed as you took in Tomâs words. âOf course. Do you just need directions, or do you want to make a phone call to your parents? If you have a telephone, of course.â
Tom pretended to think for a moment. The latter would easily let him into your house. âWould you mind if I phoned my parents? They must be worried.â The lie slid off of Tomâs tongue like honey.
With a nod, you let Tom into the house.
Silly girl.
Tom followed you into a small living room. You pointed to the rotary dial resting atop the wooden table in front of the couch.
âIâll wait in another room.â With that, you walked up the steps to what Tom assumed to be your bedroom. âIâll be back in just a moment,â your distant voice called out.
Tom had no use for the telephone. Instead, he looked at what stood tall on the mantelpiece. It was the goblet he had created several days ago.
You must have been so confused when you awoke after being obliviated.
Tom picked up the cup and brought it closer to his face to inspect it. It was blue with carvings of seahorses and mermaids covering the upper half of it.
Tom placed the cup back to its rightful place. Heâll be kind and let you keep it.
Tom slowly walked up the steps, careful not to make the steps creak.
Once he reached the top, he scanned the three doors. One was yours, one your parents, and one the bathroom, he assumed.
Tom opened the first door. It was obviously not your parents, as the only way the bed could fit two people was if they crammed together. The sheets were pink, and books littered the vanity.
He picked one up. Pride and Prejudice. The copy looked like it had been well loved. He tucked it into his coat pocket.
He shut the door and proceeded to open the next one directly across from your room. Disappointingly, there was no sight of you in the small bathroom.
Tom shut the door again and walked towards the room at the end of the hall. He opened it up and saw you sitting on a chair, rummaging through a desk drawer.
You looked up in surprise as Tom entered, halting your movements.
Tom clasped his hands behind his back. âI just got off the phone with my father.â
You nod. âUm.. Iâm just looking for my parents' map. I know they have one, and I thought I could give you directions to help you get back home.â
How sweet.
He walked over to where you sat, and took note of how your breathing quickened as he got nearer.
You would make a nice summer plaything. And the best part was you wouldnât even remember.
a/n: that poor bunny stuck as a cup foreverđ Also, I loved going through the Harry Potter Spellbook to write this. Anyways, I hope you enjoyed! divider creds: @saradika
#tom riddle x reader#tom riddle x y/n#tom riddle#tom riddle x you#harry potter#slytherin boys x reader#harry potter x reader#one shot#tom riddle x reader one shot#hp x reader#hp fandom#voldemort#voldemort x reader#tom riddle imagine#tom riddle one shot#slytherin boys x y/n#slytherin#tom riddle x fem!reader
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I would love to hear anything else you think about Tom!
I find it really intriguing how the significance of World War II during his formative years is often understated and its impact on his later views and psychological development. This is not to suggest that we should overlook the other influences throughout his life, but I am very much so convinced that the war played a pivotal role in shaping his fear of death. ( I wonder, however, if this perspective might be influenced by more cultural and geographical factors. We in the United Kingdom, for instance, have a very distinctive approach on how we deal with the aftermath of wars. We tend to embed the memories of such conflicts deeply into our national consciousness. While I am not suggesting that other nations lack a serious regard for the war, I am wondering if it's plausible that the opinion on this more controversial view is depending on how a country impacted by the war decided to move on in the aftermath.) Anyways, I don't have too much time to write up a more thorough explanation of my opinions on this right now. Do let me know if you would want to know more as I'm very interested in this factor of his childhood and would love to talk more about it.
#harry potter#harry potter fandom#hp fandom#lord voldemort#slytherin#tom marvolo riddle#tom riddle#tom riddle analysis#voldemort#analysis#pureblod#muggle#harry potter headcanon#opinion#headcanon#discussion#food for thought#the death eaters#knights of walpurgis#the heir of slytherin#tom riddle x reader#tom riddle fanfiction#hp fanfic#slytherin boys
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Sumary: Tom Riddle is obsessed with reader and won't tolerate her being somewhere else than his side (Reader is against the hate on Muggles or Muggle-Born wizards)
Pairing: yandere Adult!Tom Riddle/Voldemort x fem! reader
Warnings: Dark content, obsession, mention of the three Unforgivable Curses, implied kidnapping, death, yandere, toxic behavior
Time: First Wizarding War (meaning Voldemort/Tom is still a normal man)
English is not my native language!
I DO NOT SUPPORT OR ROMANTICIZE YANDERE BEHAVIOR!!!
"Why won't you just understand that all I want to do is create a new world, a better one. One were you, and I will rule together!"
"But I don't want that! In fact, I don't even want to be near you! I'll never join you nor support you. Just give up already and let me free!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
It was another day in the Malfoy Manor where you were captured by none other than the dark lord himself. And another day, where you just hoped to escape or die. Sounds harsh? Listen to your story first...
You have known Tom since your Hogwarts time. You weren't in the same house but in the same year, and even though you weren't close, you did happen to have some lessons together. Never you would've considered him a friend. He was just a classmate who sometimes helped you with potions, and in your free time, you sometimes met him in the libary by coincidence, but that was it.
Yeah, you did find him attractive, but you would have never thought to date him or something like that. After all, he always wanted to be alone and didn't like company. You also preferred being alone, to be honest. Still, he somehow scared you from the beginning. His eyes hold no emotions, but in his actions and his aura, all you felt or saw was pure hate. Tom didn't talk about his past, but he didn't have to for you to figure out that it must have been no good one.
Once you were in sixth grade, attacks on muggle-born students happened, and in the end, Myrtle, who was a friend of yours, was killed.
Yeah, she was very difficult , but she didn't mean any harm towards anyone. Besides that, she was bullied by so many students that you just felt pity for her. You were also bullied in your first years at hogwarts until the students stopped out of nowhere. Since then, you have had problems with being social. Most people who were close with you ended up using you for their own benefits or saw you as their therapist or something like that.
Okay, Myrtle was known for being over sensitive, but still, if people knew she would cry because of mean comments, then why make them? She was in her third year when she died, and she only flew to the girls' toilet because Olive Hornby made fun of her again, which made you more sad about her death. It's not like she chose to have glasses. What was wrong with some people?
In the end, Riddle accused Hagird of being responsible for her death. Only you and Proffesor Dumbledore were convinced that it couldn't have been Hagrid. He was way too nice and kind-hearted for such a terrible crime as murder. Though you didn't think it was Tom either.
But it didn't matter. Hagrid was suspended, and that was the end of it.
Since that time, you didn't trust Tom Riddle anymore. He was the one who made everyone believe that Hagird was guilty. And somehow, since the incident, Tom's aura has become even more intimidating and dark. At least that's how it felt to you...
Once you graduated, you didn't hear of him again, which didn't bother you at all. You lived a peaceful life for a long time. You loved your job. You had true friends. You could do your hobbies. And sometimes you even went on a few dates.
But, if it would have stayed that way, you wouldn't be at Voldemorts' side against your will, would you?
The day that ruined your life was a rainy day. It wasn't too cold nor too warm, so you decided to take a walk in the nearby woods. You loved to spend your time there. All the creatures and plants fascinated you every time without fail. Sometimes, you even saw unicorns, which felt like a miracle everytime Besides, it was one of the last peaceful places left.
War would soon come. It was only a matter of time. Everybody knew that. Maybe you only had two months left, or you still got two years. No one knew except the ones on Voldemorts side.
At that time, you only knew that 'The Dark Lord' was a user of the dark arts. And he hated Muggles and Muggle-Borns. Which was enough for you to despite him. Dark magic was never something you approved, and you didn't care about the blood status of anyone. What mattered to you was always the person.
Usually, the woods were filled with life and joy, but that day was different. The forest looked intimidating from the outside, and you even thought about going back home.
Sadly, you didn't listen to your inner voice. But, it wouldn't have changed your fate...
Once you entered it, you didn't hear the happy cheers of the birds like always. And you didn't see any nifflers running by or other creatures in general. Something was definitely wrong.
But you continued to walk, which would soon turn out to be a fatal mistake. As soon as you reached the river, that was in the forest, you realized why everything was so different than usual.
Death Eaters had chased and killed a Muggle-Born witch with her family. They were on a camping trip, as you could tell from the scenery. But there was still a girl, most likely two or three years old, still alive.
Without a second thought, you hid behind a big tree and some bushes around it.
It seemed like the Death Eaters didn't know what to do with her. Maybe she wasn't part of the plan? At first, you thought that this was not an important mission for them, but then you saw Bellatrix. She was very well known as Voldemorts' right hand. She personally learned dark magic from him and was definitely the most loyal Death Eater there ever was. So this must be a really important matter.
You couldn't stand her guts and wanted nothing more than to just slap her even if you didn't know her in person. Dark magic wasn't something you supported. But still, you couldn't deny that she was dangerous and powerful. Her madness didn't lower that fact.
Since dying wasn't on your to-do lost today, you ran away as fast as you could. Since they were arguing so loud, they didn't hear you. Of course, you wanted to help the little girl, but it was simply impossible to get her without getting caught. And against a whole troup of Death Eaters with one being BELLATRIX, you didn't stand a chance.
But luck wasn't on your side...
As you ran away from the horrible scene, you ran into a Death Eater. They wore their typical black clothes and their mask was on, so you didn't see who it was.
Before you could grab your wand, you heard an angry mumbled 'stupor'. You fell onto the ground and blacked out.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
When you awoke, you didn't dare to open your eyes. After all, you got caught by a death eater, so you being alive was a miracle. You didn't hear any voices around you. It also wasn't cold and wet around you, so being locked up in a cellar wasn't the case as well...
Beneath you was a comfortable mattress. It was soft and made you want to fall asleep on it. But what the hell was this all about?!
If you're caught by the bad guys, you normally don't wake up in a soft bed. Did they bring you back home? No, that would be too risky. Maybe they wanted some information, but you weren't really someone well known in the wizarding world.
Patiently, you waited a few more minutes, but still not even the slightest noise. So you opened your eyes.
You were in a dark room. The main colors were black and dark green. Black wardrobes and black walls. The bed was made of black wood, but the sheets were dark green, the big carpet on the floor as well. No one was with you in this room. Desperately, you wanted to know where you were. From the colors, you would have guessed that it was a Slytherin Dormitory in Hogwarts. But kidnappers don't bring you to your old school!
Scared you inspected the room once again. Nothing was familiar...
You took a deep breath and stood up. If you would die, fine, but as long as you had the slightest chance of escape you would take it.
The carpet felt also really expensive beneath your feet. By the way, your kidnappers were so nice to pull off your shoes before laying you into bed...
Everything in this room seemed to be just made for this specific room. Which frightened you even more.
Suddenly, the door was opened, and you saw a pretty woman (walking down the street đ¤Ł) in the doorframe. She was slim and tall, had long blonde hair that was tied up in a bun. Her tight dress was rose gold with a black cloak over it. All in all, she looked like a wealthy woman. Her face was pretty as well, but she looked like she got a dung under her nose. Weird.
"Get up and follow me, My Lady," her cold and clear voice told you.
"Uhm, I'm not your Lad -" but she was already on her way to your goal. You had no clue where it was, but following her was better than sitting around, right?
"I know this must be really confusing, but our Lord will explain it to all of us soon. I was just told to get you and call you that. Now, please, don't make this harder for us than it already is,"
You managed to catch up to her. Now you also saw that her eyes were ice blue. Matching her cold voice.
"Who are you?" you asked softly. Kowing her name could be a good hint to where you were.
"Narcissa Black, soon to be Narcissa Malfoy," the woman didn't look at you for one second, her eyes were focused on the walls. So you were still in the claws of the death eaters. Family Black was well known for their puryity, not a family you would have gotten along with.
The corridor was huge by the way. Dark colors still dominating. Only the chandelier was white. Did this belong to one person or was it the headquarters of Voldemort and his minions or what? Instead of getting awnsers you only got more questions as you walked after Narcissa.
Downstairs. A few steps upstairs again. Left. Left again. Right. Straight forward. The second right.
Was this a house or a Labyrinth?! How were you supposed to find your way in here? You even got lost in Digeon Ally!
But after what felt like an internity, you both reached a large black table, people gathered around it. A tall man stood up from his chair as he heard you two enter. As he turned around, you saw your old classmate Tom Riddle, but if he was here, he wouldn't help you. If he became a death eater, he was behind after everything you swore to fight. He wasn't an ally or a friend anymore. He was a danger and a threat to you and many innocent people who weren't here.
You tried to hide behind Narcissa. After all, she was the only person who seemed at least a little trustworthy, and she was another woman. Maybe she knew how unsafe you felt because mostly men were in this room. The only other woman was a mad Bellatrix, never ever you would trust her.
"Ah, there they are. Come in, " Tom spoke. His voice had changed, and it was more intimidating than it was before.
You didn't move an inch, but Narcissa started to move forward. Being all alone without someone to hide behind was more scarry, so you followed her, but you were still behind her.
"Oh no, don't be afraid. No one here will even dare to glare at you, my dear. They knew the punishment would be worse than death," You couldn't recognize Tom anymore. The hate in his presence, his voice, his appearance, everything scared you. Back in school, you didn't fear him, at least not for his house or his roots. Just because he was a Slytherin, it didn't mean that he was evil, but now? His opinions were completely different than yours, and this was not a stupid novel of the stereotype enemies to lovers cause he was just plain and simple wrong with his thoughts on muggleborn or muggles in general.
[Funfact: I don't get the hype on this topic, see, for being autistic I got bullied for many years and than reading a story about two people hating each other's guts and than falling for each other just feels wrong for me, you can read whatever you want ofc, this was just my unpopular opinion]
Still, you hid behind Narcissa, but as she tried to go towards a man with long blonde hair and her crazy sister, you felt completely defenseless. The only person you used to know seemed to be the head of everything here, and Narcissa wasn't at your side anymore. Sadly, Tom saw your fear. He went towards you and pulled you in an unwanted hug. Softly, he petted your hair and whispered sweet nothings. As soon as this horror hug ended, he smiled at you and turned towards the others.
"If anything should happen to her, everyone will be held responsible! You know the punishment, now go! We are done here!" As the last word fell, everyone disapparated, and only you and him were left.
And then you realized it. If he could order the death eaters around, he must be the dark lord himself. Tom Riddle, your old classmate, was Voldemort.
You backed away from him but regretted it soon. Tom didn't take rejection good...
"Why are you scared? I won't harm you. In fact, I am the one who has kept you safe since I saw you!"
"Are you mad?!" You yelled back into his already mad face. Wrong choice again. In full rage he stormed through the room and kicked everything in his way. Chairs and even the whole table practically flew through the room.
"Who protected you from those bullies back in Hogwarts?! Who kept you safe from all filthy boys who just wanted to break your heart?! Who killed the mudblood Myrtle so you were safe from her?!"
So Dumbledore was right... Tom opened the chamber of secrets all those years ago. And killed your friend.
"Myrtle was my friend! I never asked for your personal protection, Tom!"
Somehow that calmed him down! Yep, that man was a complete psychopath...
"But you didn't have to, my dear", he ran towards you and cupped your cheek while looking into your eyes.
"Keeping you safe will always be my priority. I loved you the moment I laid eyes on you and I knew that I would always protect you. Look around, here in our mansion you will always be safe. No one will ever harm you again. We'll be safe here! After I've won this war you and I can live here in peace. Just imagine it, I'll make us so many horcruxes that we won't ever die. Here we will raise our kids and they'll never go through the pain of being an orphan like I was", pain and hate was in his voice at the simple thought of 'death' and 'orphan'. But having a family with this insane man? Hell nah, you'd flee the moment you got the chance!
"I know now this is scary for you, and you might think of escaping, but this whole mansion is surrounded by death eaters, the moment you even think of fleeing you'll be brought to your room and trust me, I know how to punish or torture someone so that no mistace will ever happen again",
And that's how you ended up here. Behind you was the man that claimed to love you fast asleep. Yet he was the one who made you go through all of this. Most traumas you had were because of his action. If this was love, than you could already drown in it.
You had no idea if you could ever escape or if even the try of escaping was a good idea. This man wasn't well known for his kindness or his patience.
Maybe playing along would make it easier, but would your mental health take that well? Or would that make him do worse things 'out of love'?
Still, you rethought your first actions towards Tom, trying to figure out what made his obsession start. Was it your look? Your hairstyle? Your body language?
Or was it just being unlucky?
#Tomxreader#reader insert#tom riddle#tom riddle x reader#voldemort#voldemort x reader#yandere#dark themes#yandere x reader#harry potter#harry potter universe#first wizarding war
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Dark! Tom Riddle x Hufflepuff! Reader
Tom Marvolo Riddle was hard to avoid especially when he is the one who wants you.
At Hogwarts, the Slytherin heir is what every girl wants in a boyfriend, handsome, intelligent and powerful.
The fact that he already has followers who worship the ground he walks on, made you realize that he is a red flag, therefore you made sure to avoid him.
I mean his followers terrorize muggle-borns and you have a feeling that Tom is associated with the forbidden type of dark arts.
Staying away from him is probably a good decision.
Unfortunately, Tom took an interest in you simply because you are a descendant of Merlin and Helga Hufflepuff.
You would always shy away from his flirtatious gazes and sweet spoken words which he is clearly trying to seduce you with.
At the beginning, he thought of you as a way to achieve his goal of getting the ancestral hufflepuff's cup, but Tom found himself attracted to you.
You are shy and kind but not silly.
However, you lack in your studies, a chance that Tom took as he convinced you that he could tutor you.
You were forced to accept his off after you were pressured by professor Slughorn.
When you received high grades on your exams, you started to trust the Slytherin heir.
But only as a friend.
However, that did not please Tom.
After all, he always got what he wanted whether it was by agreement or by force.
His foolish mother might have managed to get his father to marry her with a love potion.
But, Tom will use the imperius curse on you instead, a much more effective curse then some silly love potion.
All he has to do is wait after you both graduate just so he can control you fully.
"Tell me, (Y/n)...have you ever thought about marriage?"
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