#together with gon's “killua.. killua..” in the forest. and the way he looked when he said it
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littleandalot · 2 months ago
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"if Killua only asked, he would have his answer" oh fuck oh fuck
we all know what the answer would have been. we all know
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Some yummy HxH headcanons that are mostly Hisoillu
Hisoka is a pretty good cook and cooks for Illumi whenever he comes over however, when he’s alone the kitchen isn’t even touched and he just orders takeout.
Illumi is no longer allowed in the kitchen because he will burn water.
Hisoka is not getting his deposit back as he has painted all his walls pink, replaced all the doorknobs with heart shaped ones, stained the bathroom red with hair dye and most definitely messed up the ceiling above his bed by throwing cards at it when he’s bored.
Hisoka is a maximalist so his apartment is very cluttered it’s clean but there’s stuff everywhere, Illumi was appalled the first time he came over.
Illumi barely has anything in his room other than books but he does have a rather large collection of moths and beetles that he pinned.
Hisoka buys most of Illumi’s clothes, terrifying Kikyo.
Illumi has to set aside 20 percent of his assassin money to bribe Milluki and Kalluto, unfortunately when mother’s precious baby Kalluto is involved there’s only so much threatening he can do.
Silva has forbidden any of the Zoldycks from smoking however that doesn’t prevent Kikyo for running off into the forest, only to be caught by one of her children.
Kalluto is a clean freak and everything in his room has a place.
Milluki didn’t mind watching Kalluto when he was a toddler because he was quiet and didn’t pitch fits however he found it amusing that Illumi looked like a tried mom most of the time with Killua and Alluka both running about.
The Zoldyck children never really interact during the daytime however like normal siblings they find each other in the kitchen at 3 am making cereal and eventually end up in Milluki’s room playing Mario cart.
Illumi never told Kalluto and Milluki that he was married to Hisoka but Kalluto found to from the phantom troupe in ways he definitely didn’t want to, he swiftly told Milluki and they got enough pizza to send a horse into a coma.
Illumi wakes up really early but if he could he’d sleep all day.
During summer Illumi avoids the sun like the plague and Hisoka doesn’t put on nearly enough clothes.
Hisoka has a pile of magazines just on the floor next to his couch.
Illumi gets cat called a lot and Hisoka finds it hilarious.
Machi and Illumi dislike each other and Kalluto is stuck in the middle of their feud.
Killua and Gon like to sit in fields together and listen to music.
After Killua and Gon separated, Killua and Alluka met up with Bisky so Alluka could learn the basics of nen. Bisky yelled at Killua because he didn’t know how to do Alluka’s hair and she showed him how to braid it.
Since Kalluto is around the phantom troupe so much he’s started talking like them and Illumi constantly has to remind him not to use foul language.
Everyone talks to Kalluto about their problems because they think he won’t tell.
Illumi doesn’t know slang and so he is constantly confused when speaking to Milluki, he has to text Hisoka for answers who will gladly jump at the chance of causing drama.
Kurapika constantly gets emails from Hisoka about random stuff.
When Killua found out Hisoka and Illumi were married he was eating dinner with Gon and he immediately curled up into a ball and kept repeating “Im related to a clown…”
Gon gets grasshoppers and collects them in jars, he gets very sad when Mito tells him they are not allowed in the house.
Leorio makes a lot of gay jokes.
Hisoka really dislikes Kikyo.
When Gon and Killua have sleep overs, they usually get tangled in blankets and fall off the bed.
Whenever Gon does something stupid Killua tells him he’s “Engaging in fatherless behavior”
Chrollo stole an ambulance and named it the spider-mobile.
Chrollo drives the spider-mobile and every time they see one of those crosses for people who’ve gotten into an accident on the road he pulls over and prays for them.
Phinks bet Kalluto that he couldn’t eat a spoon of hot sauce with a straight face and lost 50 Jenny and his dignity.
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iwritenarrativesandstuff · 10 months ago
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There's a small moment in the Hunter x Hunter 2011 anime that I thought was pretty cute. It's close to the beginning, during the Hunter Exam, when they're looking for pigs in the forest. Gon slides down a hill, and Killua follows him, only for him to crash because Gon had stopped at the bottom of the hill. This scene!
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It's one of those rare little bits added by an adaptation that really add to the characters - because yeah, this was not in the manga.
I find this anime is really good at adding little moments that either
are just cute or endearing
are fun extra interactions that show off the character dynamics more
actually highlight something about the characters in question
This one, I feel, does all three. First of all, I just love seeing Killua a bit more involved in their group before the eventual reveal of "he just wanted to be friends". It's really sweet.
But mostly, I think it's interesting that Killua assumed Gon was just messing around, when Gon was actually focusing his efforts on beating the challenge. Because, sure, Killua finds Gon somewhat intriguing, and he really wants to stick around him due to his desire for a friend - but Killua still sees himself as a class above pretty much everyone else there, and also as an assassin in a category so firmly removed from "regular kid".
So, Killua totally misreads Gon here. He assumes Gon is just doing a regular kid thing and attempts to mimic it so he can join in. It doesn't actually occur to him that Gon was tracking the pigs, or focusing on the task at hand.
It's a far cry from later on, where Killua and Gon are primarily a team effort - in sync, aware of the others' strengths, and taking each other quite seriously.
And part of it, of course, is that they just don't know each other very well at this point. But I think another thing is that Killua, during most of the Hunter Exam, is more invested in what Gon represents than who he is, necessarily.
His first friend represents rebellion against his family, childish enjoyment, and the desire for connection and understanding that he is not receiving. And even though, as time goes on, he grows more and more impressed with Gon, I really don't think it fully clicked that he wanted that friend he wished for to be specifically Gon until he was confronted by Illumi.
I also think Killua takes Gon a lot more seriously after the fight with Hanzo, and especially after Gon went all the way to the Zoldyck estate to save him. Before the Hanzo fight, Killua was outright irritated by Gon being ranked higher than him overall, and was even a little bitter at the beginning of the fight ("I could've dodged that easily" comes to mind).
By Heavens Arena, I feel they both have a much firmer grasp on, and appreciation for, who the other is as a person. Killua is more consciously aware of his investment in Gon as an individual rather than an abstract, and Gon is aware of Killua's crappy upbringing and is quick to be very supportive of him as he figures things out for himself.
During the Hunter Exam though, a lot of the interactions between them feel a lot like Killua is either mimicking or acting out "regular kid" behaviours, either because that's what he thinks Gon is already doing, or he wants to see if Gon will respond in kind.
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Aaaaand... he does. :)
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So, while they do not have what I feel is a true depth of bond here yet, the foundation is already being laid down for their powerful friendship - Gon and Killua both show an immediate willingness and enjoyment to go along with what the other wants to do and to try out what the other is good at, and they wind up having a whole lot of fun together right off the bat.
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kisayuri · 1 month ago
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The Young Butler (KilluGon Long fic)
An alternative story where Gon is recruited from a young age to work as a Butler for the Zoldycks. KilluGon. Slow-burn romance.
Chapter 2. Together
(Notes at the end) You can find it too on AO3 here: The Young Butler - Kisayuri - Hunter X Hunter [Archive of Our Own] Or here (in Spanish): El joven Mayordomo - Kisayuri - Hunter X Hunter [Archive of Our Own] I hope you like it :)
That wasn’t the first time Illumi had poisoned him. He must have been barely three years old when his family started slipping small amounts of all kinds of substances into his food, all with the goal of gradually getting his immune system used to the toxins. Sometimes the poisons were mild; other times, though, they tore him apart from the inside, leaving him on the brink of collapse.
Killua despised it.
The bitterness in his mouth, the fire in his throat, his body fighting, rejecting the poison, screaming inside. For what?
But he was a Zoldyck. Enduring this was his duty… ...wasn’t it?
He curled up on the damp ground. As soon as he felt the poison burn its way down his throat, he fled the mansion to the woods, now hiding near the wall by the gate, trying to make himself as small as possible, invisible. His mind felt clouded, making it harder and harder to distinguish the sounds around him. He stifled a sob. He wasn’t afraid of the forest. What he feared was inside him now, burning him up, but it was also in his own home.
Suddenly, with some difficulty, he made out the clumsy sound of footsteps approaching him.
“Killua?”
No, no, no. He didn’t want to be seen like this.
Why did it have to be him, of all people?
“…Go away,” he managed to mutter.
Just saying those words made his throat burn again, and a retch tore through his stomach like a knife ripping him apart from the inside, relentless. He buried his face deeper into his arms, trying to hide the trembling in his body.
But the boy in front of him didn’t make any move to leave.
“But Killua, are you hurt? I-I can go tell someone...”
The moment he felt Gon’s hand on his shoulder, he snapped his head up and angrily swatted it away.
“I said GO AWAY!!” he exploded, then jumped to his feet and backed away from him. No, Gon couldn’t see him like this. Not now. Fragile, defenseless, broken.
Gon stood there, motionless, silent, watching him with those eyes that never knew what it meant to give up. That look of endless concern only made Killua feel more vulnerable, weaker.
Killua looked away, gritting his teeth as another wave of pain hit him. He could feel the tears welling up, but he refused to let them fall. He couldn’t allow himself to cry.
“Go,” he ordered again.
“You don’t have to do this alone, Killua,” Gon insisted gently, stepping forward cautiously.
Killua shook his head, still unable to meet his gaze. Defeated, he leaned back against the wall and let his body slide down until he was sitting on the ground again.
“…Please, just leave me alone,” he pleaded.
He closed his eyes and buried his face in his knees once more, hoping Gon would give up and walk away.
"Killua..." Gon began, his breath slightly unsteady, as if he were gathering the strength to say something. "I… I know what you’re going through, too."
His voice was so quiet that for a moment, Killua thought he’d imagined it.
"What...?" he whispered, opening his eyes to look at him.
With a sigh, Gon sat down on the ground in front of him, and for the first time, Killua noticed it. The slight tremor in his hands, his uneven breathing, a drop of sweat sliding down his temple.
"Because of the training... it's not just you," Gon continued, making an obvious effort to keep his voice steady. "Sometimes they give me something, too. All of them, actually." He shrugged. "Not as strong as what they give you, I guess, but..."
He didn’t finish the sentence, but Killua didn’t need him to. His eyes widened, unable to process what Gon was hinting at.
"What… are you saying?" he murmured, trying to take it in. "You too…?"
"Yeah..." Gon admitted, with a sad smile. "But I didn’t want to tell you before. I wasn’t supposed to…"
Killua watched him closely, and suddenly he saw it clearly: something was different about the boy standing in front of him. Gon, always so strong, so sure of himself, was vulnerable now, just like him. The same poison running through his own veins was in Gon’s as well. A flood of questions rushed through his mind. How long? Who was doing this? Why hadn’t he run away, when he could have? No, he hadn’t run. He had come to find him. Despite everything.
“Why…?” Killua began, his voice barely a whisper, no longer trying to hide the tears. But Gon cut him off before he could say more.
“Because you don’t have to do this alone!” Gon exclaimed, grabbing him firmly by both hands. His eyes locked onto Killua’s, filled with determination. “No matter what happens, Killua, we’re in this together, okay?”
Killua pressed his lips together. And for the first time in a long while, he realized he truly had someone by his side in the midst of that pack of wolves. Someone he could trust, someone genuine. Someone real.
Is this what it’s like to have a friend?
His lips released a shaky sigh.
“Together…” he murmured. Gon nodded.
“Together.”
~~~~~~
Killua woke up with a faint bitter taste in his mouth. It was barely noticeable, but it was there. He grimaced in disgust. Again?
Three years had passed since then, and they were still trying, despite him proving time and time again that he could handle far worse. At twelve, his body had already been exposed to hundreds, maybe thousands of poisons. Nothing surprised him anymore. He rolled his eyes. And yet, his brother kept insisting on testing new methods to make him stronger, more resilient. As if he wasn’t already.
He got out of bed, dressed quickly, and made his way down the hall toward the entrance. His steps were silent, barely touching the floor, while his mind wandered through half-formed plans for the day.
“Mother,” he greeted flatly, not slowing down. She was waiting around a corner, but he walked right past her.
“Hello, darling.” She gave him a wide, affectionate smile. “You really shouldn’t go out today. Why not spend some time with your brother Milluki?”
Killua stopped and shot her a cold look. He knew exactly what that meant.
“I think he has something for you.”
He clenched his fists, biting back the urge to respond. Without saying another word, he turned on his heel and headed in the opposite direction. It didn’t matter. He knew he could escape whenever he wanted.
~~~~~~
"You're late," Milluki said, not taking his eyes off his computer.
Killua stepped through the doorway, closing it behind him. He gave the room a quick glance as his eyes adjusted to the darkness. The pale glow from the screen was the only light in the workshop.
"Mother said you wanted to see me." He raised an eyebrow, hands sliding into his pockets. "What do you want?" he asked, his tone cold, emotionless. They both knew he was asking out of formality—he was well aware of what this was about.
Milluki let out a smug chuckle, pushing his computer aside and swiveling in his chair to face him.
"Oh, nothing special. Mother and Illumi asked me to make sure you're still... in shape. You know, wouldn’t want you getting too soft."
Killua felt a knot tighten in his stomach, but his expression didn’t change. Milluki had always enjoyed this game, though over the years, the fear it once sparked had almost completely faded. Now, it was just a routine—a nuisance, a formality he had to endure in exchange for living in that place.
“Come on, Killua, don’t act tough,” Milluki said, getting up from his desk and heading toward the examination table in the corner. Killua followed him in silence, sitting on it without protest, fully aware that resistance would be pointless. He watched his brother as he connected cables and adjusted the machine. What’s Gon doing right now? he wondered, taking off his shirt and placing it aside. He sat still while Milluki attached the cables to his chest and arms. Was Gon training with Gotoh? Or had he snuck off again?
Milluki finished setting up the machine and pressed the power button. Killua felt the first jolt, and a faint buzzing sound filled the air. At first, it was barely noticeable, but the current gradually intensified until it surged through his entire body. His muscles tensed involuntarily, but he kept his composure. He wasn’t going to give Milluki the satisfaction.
The buzzing grew louder, and from the corner of his eye, Killua saw his brother lean closer, a cruel smirk spreading across his pudgy face. “It’s fascinating how well you handle this now,” Milluki said, watching closely, waiting for a reaction. “I almost enjoy it more when it doesn’t hurt you... almost.”
He twisted the dial a little further, and the current surged slightly. Killua felt the crackling electricity race through his body, burning his skin beneath the cables and sending his heart racing. It hurt, but he remained expressionless, calm. How long would be enough to satisfy Milluki this time?, he wondered. An hour? Two?
“Oh, by the way,” Milluki continued, his incessant chatter somehow worse than the shocks themselves. “I’ve heard some rather interesting rumors,” he said casually. “You know how the staff is—they tend to talk a little too much sometimes.”
Because you spy on them, Killua thought.
He didn’t respond, but his mind went on high alert. Milluki wouldn’t bring something like that up without a reason. His brother smiled, eyes locked on him, clearly aware he’d hit a nerve.
“Apparently, you’ve been spending a lot of time in the woods,” Milluki said, subtly increasing the intensity, causing Killua’s body to twitch slightly. “And as far as I know… you’re not going alone.”
Killua clenched his jaw, a small movement that Milluki likely didn’t miss.
“I don’t know who told you that,” Killua replied dryly, “but they’re probably exaggerating. I go out to train. Alone.”
He had to stay firm. He knew Milluki didn’t have anything solid. If he did, their family would’ve started monitoring him long ago.
“Oh, sure. I believe you.” He didn’t. “But you know how rumors work around here.. Sometimes there’s a bit of truth to them…” He clicked his tongue theatrically. “Just imagine how Mother and Father would react if they found out you were sneaking off with the wrong company, don’t you think?."
Killua closed his eyes for a moment, focusing on his breathing as the electricity coursed through his body, burning beneath his skin. He knew exactly what was at stake. And he wasn’t going to give Milluki anything. 
He wouldn’t fall into his trap.
“I’m not sneaking off,” he replied calmly, opening his eyes and meeting his brother’s gaze with cold indifference. “What, am I not allowed to take a walk in the woods now?”
Milluki gave him a cold smile.
“Of course you are,” he murmured, leaning in dangerously close to whisper, “…though it would be a problem if they found out you were breaking any rules. And that wouldn’t be good for either of you—you, or… whoever it is you’re meeting with.” He straightened up again. “Hypothetically, of course.”
Another click. This time, the shock was much stronger. Killua screamed inside, but outwardly, he remained unfazed. When he replied, he didn’t break eye contact with his brother.
“If I had any secrets,” he began, with some effort, “it would mean you’re not doing your job very well, wouldn’t it?” He tilted his head slightly, letting his lips curl into a smile that was anything but innocent. “I wonder what Mother would say about your surveillance system.” He raised an eyebrow. “Hypothetically.”
Milluki’s smile vanished.
That’ll get him off my back.
For a few seconds, the buzzing of the machine was the only sound in the room.
"Don’t do anything stupid unless you want things to go south for you," Milluki muttered, avoiding eye contact, and effectively ending the conversation.
Killua remained still for several more minutes, until he felt the electricity slowly drain from his body as Milluki shut off the machine and returned to his desk without a word. He didn’t bother questioning him. Quickly, he removed the cables and headed for the door, pulling on his hoodie while already planning how to prevent Milluki’s suspicions from growing.
Without looking back, he left his brother’s workshop, fully aware that he’d need to be even more cautious from now on. But for the moment, he had other plans.
~~~~~~
Killua sped through the forest surrounding the mansion, his steps so light they left no trace on the damp earth, yet the frustration in his every movement was unmistakable.
An incessant murmur followed him as he ran. To an ordinary person, it would have been nothing more than barely audible whispers, swallowed by the wind and the rustling leaves. But anyone with a trained ear could easily pick up the string of curses and insults he muttered under his breath, the anger boiling over after his encounter with his brother.
When he felt he was far enough from the mansion, Killua stopped beneath a tall, thick tree. He took a deep breath and exhaled slowly, trying to soak in the calm of his surroundings.
“Where’d you learn all those curse words?” a playful voice suddenly asked.
Killua looked up and met a pair of amber eyes staring down at him from one of the branches.
“In the dictionary,” he replied with sarcasm, but couldn’t stop a slight smile from creeping onto his face.
Gon let out a loud laugh and, with a quick jump, landed on the ground, brushing the dust off his suit. He’d only started wearing it a few months ago, ever since he turned twelve. Killua knew how uncomfortable it made him.
“I was heading to the usual spot. You coming?” Gon asked with his usual contagious energy.
“You should be training. Gotoh’s gonna scold you again,” Killua warned as he started walking again, though he knew Gon didn’t care. “What kind of butler are you, anyway?” he teased. “I’m gonna have to put a note in your file that says something like ‘unfit,’ or ‘skips duties constantly and has a terrible attitude,’” he joked.
“Hey! That’s not true, I’m totally fit for the job!” Gon exclaimed, giving him a playful elbow. “Besides, Gotoh doesn’t need to find out,” he added. “It’s just a quick break. I need to unwind.”
Killua nodded in agreement. Even if it was just for a little while, being with Gon always managed to help him forget the shadows that haunted him at home.
Their usual spot wasn’t far, so they arrived quickly. Once they climbed the tree, Killua leaned against the trunk while Gon sat beside him, his legs swinging freely. A comfortable silence settled between them as they looked out over the vast forest stretching beyond the wall.
Despite the calm, Killua could still feel the lingering effects of the shocks under his skin. He discreetly pulled down his sleeve to hide the marks from the earlier session, though Gon probably noticed right away.
“How’s your training going? Are they… treating you well?” Killua asked cautiously, trying to divert his attention.
Gon raised an eyebrow and smiled, giving him a look that practically screamed, “I think I should be the one asking that, don’t you think?” Still, he just shrugged and turned his gaze back to the horizon.
“It’s going alright. You know, the usual,” he said. “Gotoh’s tough, but he’s actually a good guy, and he helps me get stronger. Besides,” he added, “they say you’ve got to be ready to protect the Zoldycks from anything. That’s what they always say, anyway.”
Killua rolled his eyes at the mention of his family. Still, he knew Gon wasn’t telling him everything. He had seen firsthand how many of the butlers were treated, especially by his mother and Milluki. Most of them, if not all, were nothing more than puppets, tools that his family could use however they wanted. And the training they put them through? ‘Brutally harsh’ didn’t even begin to describe it. He’d never admit it, but deep down, the thought of what they might do to Gon if someone in the family snapped one day terrified him.
“Do you miss your old life?” Killua asked suddenly after a stretch of silence.
Gon didn’t look at him, a sad smile tugging at his lips.
“You can’t miss something you don’t remember.”
“Yeah, well, but…”
It wasn’t the first time they’d had this conversation. Still, Killua occasionally tried to bring it up, hoping to draw out a little more about the real world beyond.
“I barely remember anything,” Gon insisted, staring into the distance. “From the orphanage, I mean. One day, Tsubone showed up and took me away. And my parents… I never knew them. I’ve told you that before. All I know is that he’s a Hunter, and he left me there for them to take care of me. That’s it.”
What Gon said next caught Killua off guard.
“You know what? I think I would’ve liked to be one too!” Gon flashed him a quick smile. “Can you imagine?”
Killua’s chest tightened.
Gon, a Hunter?
For a moment, the thought terrified Killua. He couldn’t—wouldn’t—imagine what his life would have been like growing up in that family without Gon by his side. He would’ve gone crazy. Or worse, maybe he would’ve turned out like his brothers.
But what would Gon have gained if he’d grown up somewhere else? Freedom. A happy life, far from the psychopaths in Killua’s family. Safe. Maybe he could’ve even gone looking for his real parents, for his true family. Maybe…
“And you…” Killua swallowed hard, focusing all his attention on pushing down the knot in his throat. “Would you… want to be one… someday?”
“Of course!” 
His chest tightened further. He hadn’t even hesitated.
Shit.
…Why did this feel so awful now?
The thought that, deep down, Gon might actually prefer being a Hunter felt both admirable and terrifying. Of course, anyone would choose that over being trapped in a life serving his family. But what if one day Gon decided to leave and never look back? He had every right to.
“Although, Killua…” Gon added, completely unaware of the worries eating him up inside, “with how strong you are, I think you could be one too,” he finished with certainty.
Killua let out a bitter laugh.
“Are you even listening to yourself? It’s ridiculous,” Killua muttered, glancing at him out of the corner of his eye. “Gon, I’m the heir to the Zoldyck family. They’ve been training me for that since I was born. What makes you think I could even consider…?” He shook his head, clicking his tongue.
“But still—”
“No,” Killua cut him off, firm. “It’s not possible. It doesn’t make sense. I couldn’t…”
He didn’t finish the sentence when a small seed of doubt planted itself in his mind.
Couldn’t he?
“Well, then neither will I.”
Gon’s words, spoken so casually, hung in the air for a few seconds, and for a brief moment, time seemed to stop as Killua processed what he’d just heard. He blinked slowly, a slight flutter in his stomach. He swallowed.��Did he just…?
He looked at him.
Gon was watching him with the kind of determination only he could have.
“What are you say—?”
“Killua, I’m not going anywhere without you,” Gon said, unwavering. “You’re my best friend. It’s both of us, or neither.”
He felt his chest warm, and the fluttering in his stomach grew more noticeable.
“Gon,” he whispered, barely audible, “you’re an idiot,” he muttered, turning away and covering his face with a hand to hide the smile that had inevitably spread across his lips. 
Now he felt stupid for ever doubting him.
Gon grinned back.
“I mean it, Killua!” He leaned forward, hands on the trunk in front of him, so close that, for a second, the forest disappeared, and all Killua could see were Gon’s big amber eyes. “You’re my best friend, and the strongest, most awesome person I know (though, okay, I don’t know that many people). You should start believing that already. We’re in this together, remember?”
Gon was staring at him with way too much intensity. And way too close. Heat rushed to Killua’s face, and his cheeks turned red before he could stop it.
“Sh-shut up, idiot! Don’t just say stuff like that out of nowhere!” he yelled, shoving Gon’s face away with his foot, pushing him as far as possible. Gon almost fell off the tree in the process.
“Ah! Killua, don’t be so rough!” He shouted, quickly grabbing hold of the branch to keep from falling. Killua cleared his throat, ignoring Gon’s complaints, trying to regain his composure, but his heart was still racing.
“You brought it on yourself, idiot. D-don’t just say things like that…”
“Aaaaw, are you embarrassed?”
“Shut up!”
Once again, a comfortable, easy silence fell between them, this time with the soft rustling of the wind in the branches growing stronger. Gon turned back to the view, humming to himself while he gently swung his legs.
Killua couldn't help but smile.
His gaze drifted back to the distant Zoldyck mansion, now looking tinier than ever.
"Do you hear that?" Gon suddenly asked.
It all happened so fast.
A distant buzzing shattered the silence, mingling with the sound of the wind. They both looked around, trying to pinpoint its source. Gon was the first to spot it. A flash that lasted just milliseconds in the distance was all he needed to understand what it was.
"Down, now!” He grabbed Killua by the arm, giving him no time to grasp what was happening, and leaped down, aiming for one of the lower branches shielded by the tree's foliage. He pushed him against the trunk and placed a finger to his lips.
"What?"
"Shh."
They waited in silence as the buzzing sound grew closer and closer. For several tense minutes, they held their breath, listening as it passed overhead and slowly began to fade into the distance. Finally, they both let out a relieved sigh.
“I think it was one of Milluki's drones," Gon said quietly, finally letting go of Killua.
Killua cursed to himself. His brother had actually taken his comments about the surveillance system seriously. He should've seen it coming. How could he have been so stupid?
“Well done, Gon,” he sighed. “If he had caught us…”
If he had caught them, they might as well be dead now. Gon let out a small laugh.
“Who's ‘unfit’ now, huh?” he joked.
Killua rolled his eyes, pressing his lips together to avoid smiling.
“Let’s go.”
And with feline agility, he began to climb down with Gon following close behind.
~~~~~~
Killua’s mind was racing. Drones, transmitters, trackers, bugs... Up until now, his brother’s surveillance had only covered the areas around the mansion, inside the house, and the Butler’s Quarters, but it had never reached this far. It wasn’t just Mother, Illumi, or Gotoh anymore—there were more threats waiting for them outside if they were caught together. He stared at the sleeves of his hoodie in horror. What if Mulluki had planted a tracker on him while he was in the workshop? Paranoia started creeping in, and suddenly, it all felt overwhelming. Too many dangers, too many variables. There was no doubt—they were going to have to be way, way more careful from now on, watching every step they took. Maybe even cutting back on their meetings would be a smart move, at least for a while…
He glanced at Gon, walking calmly beside him.
His heart clenched a little.
The selfish part of him wanted to dismiss that option, but he couldn’t ignore it. He knew that if they got caught, the one who would really suffer the consequences wouldn’t be him.
It would be Gon.
He bit his lip.
He had to do something. He just needed to come up with a way to...
“By the way,” Gon said suddenly, cutting through his internal monologue, still walking calmly. “I haven’t told you yet, but...” He turned to him with a big smile. “Gotoh gave me permission to go to the city this weekend!”
Killua froze in his tracks, caught off guard.
“Are you serious?” He couldn’t help but feel a small pang of jealousy. Up until now, he’d only been able to go out for training, always kept away from people, and under strict surveillance. Never for fun. The only time he’d ever had real freedom was during his stay at Heaven’s Arena, and even then...
“Come with me! It'll be fun!” Gon added.
Killua looked at him in silence. He knew it wasn’t possible, that Gon hadn’t really thought it through. They had literally just jumped out of a tree to avoid getting caught by his brother. It was a terrible idea, to say the least. The thought of leaving the mansion to stroll through town, alone, without any kind of watch, with his family breathing down his neck more than ever—it was absurd to even consider...
“Alright.”
Killua silenced the rational part of him, which was now screaming from the depths of his being that what he was doing was suicidal.
Gon’s smile widened, and for a moment, his eyes sparkled so brightly that Killua had to look away. He felt his heart race, though he couldn’t tell if it was because of Gon’s big, excited eyes looking at him or the sudden rush of adrenaline.
He couldn’t. He knew he shouldn’t.
But what was the worst that could happen? 
One day. Just one day of freedom.
Notes:
Honestly, I’m really happy because this chapter ended up being twice as long as the last one! :) Plus, it’s much more fleshed out than the original idea, and it helped me solidify the logline for the story. I hope you all enjoyed it! Even though the story is written in third person, I’m trying to use a limited omniscient narrator to make it feel as real and emotional as possible. Thanks so much for reading! See you next time!
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errorpeachy · 4 years ago
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Helloo!! I just discover your page and even tho you only have one fic I already love itt!!! I finished hxh last night and my heart need more💔💔 could you do a Killua x reader, they know each other since they were babies and their families wanted them to get married, but when Killua find out that’s when he escaped and maybe after that the reader escaped too but they don’t see each other until they are like 20 or something like that. Btw sorry for my English I suck hehehe.💕💕
I can absoLUTELY do this! And don’t worry bb, your English is great💞 I’m doing a scenario for this one~
𑁍 No Take Backs! 𑁍 《Killua x Reader》
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“Hey, Hey, Killua!” You shouted, running up to him with enthusiasm. He glanced at you, raising a brow. “What is it, Y/N?” He asked, turning to you. Smiling, you took his hand in yours. “I have something to show you! Follow me!” You said, pulling him along as you walked through the forest that surrounded his house.
Fighting your way into a clearing, you watched him let out a small noise of shock. It was a beautiful, crystal clear lake, one he had never seen before. Flowers surrounded the area and light shone onto the water, making it look drastically different from his dreary house. “How did you find this, Y/N? I live here and even I haven’t seen it before.” He said, looking at you. You grinned, pointing to the scrapes on your knees. “I fell into this clearing when I went exploring. Cmon, let’s swim!” You said, jumping in fully clothed. He paused before shrugging. “Ah, what the heck.” He said before jumping in, making a big splash which caused you to giggle.
“Hey Killua?” You asked, swimming over to him. He looked up at you, shaking his head to get some of the water off of him. He looked kind of like a dog, you thought. “Yeah Y/N?” He answered, powder blue eyes staring back at you. “Let’s stay best friends forever, ‘Kay?” You said, smiling up at him. He turned pink, looking away. “Sure, I guess. You’re not THAT bad.” He muttered, causing you to smile. You were used to his antics, he acted like this ever since he could talk. Even though you two were 12, he hadn’t changed a bit.
“Okay, but no take backs!”
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You woke up to the sound of arguing. You were sleeping over at the Zoldyck household, since Killua’s mom practically begged you to stay over. She was almost as protective of you as she was her own son.
Your feet met the cold wood floor of the guest bedroom as you got out of bed. Rubbing your eyes, you fixed your sleepwear before quietly opening the door. You could use Zetsu, however they would all notice it more if your aura suddenly disappeared rather than just moving around. You snuck around to the stair railing, peering between the wooden rails as you watched Killua argue with Milluki and his mother.
“I’m not marrying them!” He shouted, crossing his arms. Milluki rolled his eyes. “You should be glad mother is allowing you to marry someone in the first place, Killua!” He shouted back. Killua glared at him, before looking at his mother. “I want a choice in who I marry! Just cause we’ve been friends since we were little doesn’t mean we’d be a good match!” He said to her. “You two don’t have to be a good match to have good grandchildren. You’re the heir to the family business, and they easily match you in strength. I’m sure you two will have powerful children.” She said, causing him to give her a disgusted look. You were equally as grossed out. Sure, you did have a small crush on Killua, but children was something you definitely didn’t want to think about as a child yourself.
“Why are you even thinking about that?! I’m twelve!” He shouted. You nodded quietly in agreement, thinking it was really weird. His mother had always been a little... odd.
“Because it’s what you should be focused on! You need to take on the family business and marry the right person, and Y/N is that person!” She said, with Milluki nodding next to her. Killua huffed. “Then I’m leaving!” He shouted, storming over to the stairs. Milluki grabbed his arm. “Killua, where do yo-“ he started, but was cut off as Killua grabbed his wrist tightly with his free hand, giving him an ice cold stare. “Milluki. Let go of me.” He threatened lowly. His brother scoffed, grip tightening. In a flash, Killua dug a spare knife out of his pocket and stabbed him in the arm, causing him to reel back in shock. It was honestly a little funny, in a twisted way. His mother rushed over to Killua, pleading in her high pitched voice. He whipped around, and in an instant, she was holding her bleeding face. Her visor was knocked on the ground as she covered her face and called for her husband.
Walking up the stairs, he went over to where you were crouched down. “You’re so nosy, Y/N.” He teased, poking your cheek. You pouted. “You said you were leaving.” You muttered, looking at him. He sighed. “I am. I’m sorry, but I can’t marry you. It doesn’t feel right. I need to get out of this family business and be something that’s not related to assassin life.” He said, patting your head. You felt tears well up in your eyes, but you gulped them down. You got up onto your knees and hugged him, burying your face into the crook of his neck. He smelled like vanilla.
“I’m gonna miss you, Killua.”
“I will too.”
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Ten years had gone by since that night. After Killua left, you had gone over his last words to you in your head. You decided to quit your family business and become a hunter at the age of 14. Since then, you had been doing freelance jobs and earning money. Life was good. You still had memories of Killua, where you two stayed up and told ghost stories with a flashlight under his soft sheets or splashes around in the clear waters of you two’s secret lake. You hadn’t seen him since he left, but you thought of him often.
Shaking your head, you laced up your shoes. You had a match against some random person in Heaven’s Arena, and you were supposed to go fight in less than a minute. Standing up, you rushed to the tunnel, waiting for them to announce your name.
“And here we have the returning powerhouse, Y/N L/N!”
You stepped out onto the stage, smiling as you waved at the crowd. Scanning the audience, your eyes met a pair of blue ones.
Powder blue.
White hair.
It couldn’t be... could it?
You felt the air leave your lungs. It was him. It had to be. He looked grown up by now- of course he would, he would be 22. You blinked, trying to focus as the fight started.
‘I might as well show off a bit.’ you thought.
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The fight was almost criminally easy. You defeated the guy rather quickly before rushing off the stage, not even staying for your victory announcement. Running through the halls, you slammed straight into another person, causing you to fall back.
“Ouch! Sorry!” You said, looking up. The boy had green hair and light brown eyes, as well as a kind smile. He offered a hand to help you up, which you accepted. “It’s alright. You did great in your fight!” He complimented, causing you to smile back. “Oh, thanks! I-“
“Gon! I was looking for you, whe-“ A familiar voice said, pausing. You looked over to see who it was. Your eyes lit up as you rushed over to him.
“Killua! Oh my god, it’s been so long! I’ve missed you so much!” You shouted, hugging him. He turned red, patting your head. “Baka! Don’t say that stuff, it’s embarrassing...” he muttered. You smiled, knowing he was still the same boy you knew long ago. The boy, who’s name you now knew as Gon, looked at the two of you confused. “You know them, Killua?” He asked. “Yeah. We grew up together, but I left to take the hunter exam when we were little and I hadn’t seen them since.” He said. You nodded, smiling at him. “It’s nice to meet you, Gon!” You said, and he nodded back. “Same here!” He said.
You turned to Killua. “Come sleep over at my place! We have to catch up!” You said. He gave a smirk, looking away playfully. “I don’t know, what if people get the wrong idea?” He asked, smirking. You smacked the back of his head. “Ow!” He said.
“Don’t be a pervert!” “Fine, fine, I’ll come over. Only cause you asked.”
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Fixing the white sheets on your guest bed, you walked out to see what Killua was up to. He was sat on the couch, watching some sort of TV show about... superpowers? You sat down next to him, leaning on his shoulder. He froze, blue eyes gazing over at you. “What?” He asked, seeing you give him a gentle stare. You smiled softly. “I really missed you, Killua.” You said, hugging him. He turned red, pushing you gently by the head. “Don’t say stuff like that! It’s embarrassing...” He muttered, cheeks pink as you continued to have your arms locked tightly around his waist.
“Why did you leave without me?” You asked quietly, causing him to pause. “I needed to find myself, I needed to become something that was detached from the Zoldyck name. I figured becoming a hunter would do that, and it did. I met some really nice people, Gon being one of them.” He said, gently stroking your hair. You nodded, agreeing silently. You completely understood why he wanted to do that, but something that had been eating you alive for the last ten years had you asking one more question.
“When you said you didn’t want to marry me... was that true?”
His hand stilled, gently resting against your head as he thought quietly. “It wasn’t necessarily true, but I did feel like it wasn’t something that needed to be talked about.” He said, carefully choosing his words. You reached up and gently moved his hand off of your head, holding it in your own instead. “Ever since you left I worried about you. I know you’re strong, but I always thought about whether you were alright or not. I missed you so much- not a day went by with your name not popping up in my head.” You confessed, feeling your face heat up as you buried your face into his chest.
He still smelled like vanilla.
He tended up, his face turning red as he flicked your head. “You’re so embarrassing...” he muttered. “I’m telling the truth, though.” You said softly, looking up at him. He stated back at you, his eyes shining with... love? Was that what it was? It didn’t really matter.
“I’m in love with you, you know. You’re so stupid, making me like you.” He said, looking away as he turned bright red. He looked adorable, his cheeks puffed out due to embarrassment. You smiled, leaning up and giving him a gentle peck on the lips.
“No take backs.” You said, giggling. He rolled his eyes playfully before giving you a gentle smile.
“I’d never want to anyways.”
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babypinkhearts · 4 years ago
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can i request gon and killua meeting the reader ( who is the same age as them ) when gon and killua visit whales island together and the reader is just there with her dad when he is on a fishing trip and they become friends but she heads home when the week is over and promises to stay in touch?
hi! thank you so much for requesting! <3
pairing: gon freecss + fem!reader + killua zoldyck
warnings: none! just the boys being their amazing selves :)
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the growing heat you felt was enough for you to consider jumping off the dock and into the cold water beneath you.
obviously - you didn’t.
but that didn’t mean you weren’t tempted.
the sun felt amazing against your skin, the summer breeze blowing your hair away from your face as you stood still, eyeing the scenery around you. from all the places you had visited, this had to be the most gorgeous.
the grass was a beautiful shade of green - the water that surrounded the island was clear. you felt like you were in your own wonderland.
whale island, your father had told you the island’s name. from all his fishing trips he had asked you to come on, you were forever grateful you had agreed to this one.
you heard him chuckle at your awe, relishing in the way your eyes lit up.
“it’s so pretty.” you smiled, clutching the straps of your backpack tightly. he nodded in agreement, his hands in his pockets as he stood beside you.
you felt his stare, your head turning as you rose a brow at him. he laughed at your confusion.
“what are you waiting for?” his smile turned into a teasing look, his hand motioning in front of him. “go explore!”
you grinned in excitement, quickly thanking him before rushing ahead.
there were so many places to see - what could you possibly start with?
your eyes scanned around you. at the sight of a tremendous amount of trees, they stopped.
a forest.
smiling widely, you began to walk toward it.
it’d be nice to collect something for memories. maybe a rock? a leaf?
as soon as you entered the forest, it was hard to contain your pure joy.
quickly, you removed your backpack, placing it on the floor and rumaging through it.
gently, you took out your camera.
it’d be a waste to not capture the view of this island.
raising it, you focused it on a lake surrounded by trees.
if this picture turned out the way you want it, you could hang it in your room-
“you almost have it, killua!”
startled, you nearly dropped the expensive electronic, sighing in relief as you caught it in your hands.
the voice was insanely loud, echoing through the forest.
“who was that?” you mumbled, looking around. the entire place was vacant - you didn’t see anyone.
“see! you did it!”
up.
your head snapped up in attempt to find the person who was speaking.
to your surprise, two boys were perched on a tree above you.
it seemed as though they immediately felt your gaze, both of them turning to you at the same time.
your eyes widened, not expecting them to notice you so easily.
the boy with black hair eagerly waved at you, a grin on his face. you instantly felt all your anxiety leave you.
somehow, he made you felt comfortable.
“hi! i’m gon!”
you smiled back, waving.
“hi! i’m y/n.”
the boy beside gon gave his own greeting, though lacked a smile. it didn’t bother you - afterall, you were a stranger.
“that’s my friend, killua.” gon smiled, motioning to him. killua waved, looking down at you.
“it’s nice to meet the both of you.” you replied, looking between the two of them.
they looked around your age - something that was generally uncommon for you to see.
“we were just fishing - do you want to join?” gon asked, holding up the rod in his hand.
your eyes widened at his question.
“uh-“ your eyes darted to the water, eyeing the fish swimming below.
you were the daughter of a fisherman - it’d be a shame to pass up his offer.
with a nod, you softly smiled.
“sure!”
•••
twirling a stick in your hand, you mindlessly carved drawings into the dirt beside you.
“so, you’re only here for a week?”
a sad smile formed on your lips at the question.
“yeah.” you softly replied, staring at the fireplace in front of you.
the feeling you felt was strange.
you had spent the entire day with gon and killua, learning things about them little by little.
gon had just become a hunter - a fact that immediately surprised you, given his age.
he was from whale island, while killua was only visiting.
you weren’t sure why, but killua brushed off any personal questions you had asked him.
he didn’t say where he was from or why he wasn’t a hunter like gon - he simply switched the subject each time.
you let him, as you didn’t want to push him for answers.
it was been an amazing day - you could confidently say it was the most fun you had ever had.
the three of you had clicked automatically.
you weren’t sure what it was.
maybe it was killua’s hilarious responses to your dumb words, or gon’s uplifting spirit and refreshing innocence - but you felt connected.
“then we’ll make the most out of your stay!” gon grinned at you.
though the thought of eventually leaving them sadenned you, gon made it more bearable.
“yeah - maybe we can teach you how to properly climb a tree by the end of the week.” killua teased, referring to your earlier fail. you had fallen - leaving killua in endless laughter.
the memory made you playfully roll your eyes, a chuckle leaving your lips.
“that wasn’t my fault!” you exclaimed, mid-laugh.
“that wasn’t my fault!” killua mocked your voice, a sly smirk on his face.
gon was giggling, highly entertained by you two.
“stop!” you jokingly nudged the white-haired boy, prompting in him pushing you even harder.
he had now joined you and gon in your laughter - the three of you having trouble breathing, your stomachs burning.
“stop!”
“killua!”
“killua!”
“killua!”
•••
it seemed as though the week had flown by too fast.
seven days filled with endless laughter and joyful memories.
seven days you’d never forget.
you were right back at where you had started.
standing on the dock, looking at the scenery of whale island.
though this time, two boys were beside you.
comfortable silence filled the air.
you sighed.
“if it were up to me, i’d avoid getting on that boat and leaving the two of you.”
a small smile formed on your lips as you saw killua visibly tense in the corner of your eye. you didn’t really understand why he was so flustered when it came to affection - nonetheless, you found it amusing.
“don’t say stuff like that, idiot.” he mumbled, pushing his hands in his pockets as he turned away from you.
you rolled your eyes, snickering at him.
gon smiled at the interaction. he couldn’t say he felt exactly happy - afterall, he was about to say goodbye to a new friend.
killua was his best friend, yet he couldn’t help but think if you were to stay longer, you’d match up with him.
he watched as you turned to him, your arms crossed as you scanned his face.
the atmosphere around the three of you was gloomy.
he hated it.
you rested a hand on his shoulder, squeezing it gently.
“wipe that look off your face - you make it seem like i’m never going to see you guys again.” you chuckled, flicking his forehead.
gon’s eyes lit up at your words.
killua snapped his head in your direction.
you stared at them in confusion.
they stood in silence.
awkwardly, you faced away from them, embarrassed by their lack of response.
“i mean... if you guys want to keep in touch, that is...”
from behind you, both boys exchanged grins.
you felt an arm grab your shoulder, quickly spinning you back around.
relief washed over you as you took note of their cheeful expressions.
“you promise to call?” killua tilted his head, raising a brow at you.
eagerly you nodded, smiling brightly.
“and visit?” gon added, pointing at you.
again, you quickly agreed.
they spent five minutes listing all of their expectations - not leaving out a single detail.
they even went so far as to list your reunion spot - somewhere killua had whispered to you without gon hearing.
“and that’s all?” you asked, an amused smile on your face.
gon hummed, nodding confidently. “yeah! i think we’ve covered everything.”
you giggled, shaking your head.
you’d never meet another like him.
hesitantly, you looked behind you.
if you were to take more time, you knew your father would become impatient. he had already loaded the boat - he was just waiting for you to board so the two of you could leave.
clearly, you had stalled as much time as you possibly could.
though now, that time was no longer in your possession.
with a sigh, you turned back to the two boys.
they knew.
physical affection wasn’t exactly something you’d use very often.
though, now, it just felt right.
killua tensed as you gently wrapped your arms around him, giving him a quick squeeze before pulling back.
you didn’t want him to feel uncomfortable - you restrained yourself from hugging him longer.
gon simply invited you into his arms, almost as if he was planning on doing it no matter what.
with a smile, you pulled back, resting your hands on the straps of you backpack.
you looked at them, wanting to imprint their faces in your memory forever.
you knew it wouldn’t be long until you would see them again, yet it’d be torturous waiting for it.
with a final wave, you turned around, walking up the dock.
you’d see them again.
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insomniasymphony · 3 years ago
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Obsessive Killua Zoldyck x Female Reader [No way out]
Constellation: Obsessive Killua Zoldyck x Female Reader Words I got: → Storm → Danger → Cave Sentence I got: You still couldn't believe what you had seen a few hours before. Rating: Teenage and up Audience/ Mature (a little bit) Warning: Little Description of Violence
                   ►► Running away has many different meanings.                                    For some, it's like playing tag.                                    For others, it's sheer escape.                  And for a few, it is nothing more than mere suicide. ◄◄
Your breath comes in gasps over your lips as the storm lashes the rain against your face, tugging at your hair and chilling your skin. Goosebumps have spread across your numb skin, but it can't compete with the inner heat that has been germinating inside you since you started running. You have to get away. From him. From this family that could hardly be more sickening and finds nothing reprehensible in their behaviour. If you stayed, there would be no chance of survival, even if part of you wants to believe that Killua would protect you. But he is only a thirteen-year-old boy who knows little of the world itself, as you like to believe. He doesn't understand what's so scary about assassins, and he doesn't understand that you don't want to be part of a world full of torture and fear.
Branches whip around your legs, getting partially tangled in your clothes, which cling wetly to you as if they were a second skin. Your lungs burn and a glance back reveals that the Zoldyck estate has disappeared. Instead, you are surrounded by endless trees and bushes that offer you light shelter, but no one can tell you when the butlers will find you ��� or Killua.
For a moment you dare to stop, take a breath and recover your strength, even though the uncertainty is at your back and won't let you escape. All this you had imagined differently.
Killua, after Gon and he had parted ways at the end, had decided to take a short breather at home. And he had invited you. You'd already spent a lot of time with the two of them, starting in Greed Island and beyond, during which your love for Killua had risen and his affections had wavered in your direction as well. Once, when Gon hadn't been looking, there had been a kiss, brief and shy, but meaningful, as if you had a chance together. After that, Killua had changed.
He became more attentive. Always got in front of you. He constantly knew where you were and he demanded that you stay close to him. All that had been kind of sweet. The thought of someone caring for you so intensely had warmed your heart. But you had missed the signs of his obsession.
When he had brought you home with him, there had been his parents. A father who eyed everything quietly and a mother who had almost melted with delight. Then Killua had shown you the torture rooms because there had been interest.
And the next moment you were busy running away.
With difficulty you try to put one foot in front of the other. You must not stop until the estate is completely behind you. But the forest seems endless and your heart is pounding wildly, because the calm doesn't want to come and the fear is deep in your bones. And it is precisely this fear that gets you moving again.
Over roots, in the pouring rain that gets colder and colder, it drives you forward. Always past the same images. There is nothing here but this forest and more forest beyond, endlessly, ceaselessly, until your legs are almost numb and you get caught on something that pulls you down.
A suppressed scream sticks in your throat before you hit the muddy ground and for a moment you can't breathe. You lie still, inhaling and exhaling, before you quickly pick yourself up and slip away again.
Cursing, you slam both fists to the ground, a little distressed, a little breathless, until a little further in the distance a narrow hole comes into view and promises rescue. You crawl towards it on all fours and with every metre you get closer you realise that it is more of a crack that seems to lead into a cave.
As you reach the passage, you barely wait a moment before you stand up on both legs and push your way through the opening. It is wide enough for you, somehow, leading straight into the inner arena, which widens after the first two metres and lets you into an almost open antechamber. The bare stone walls are dimly lit by flickering torches and the first thing that really occurs to you is that it might be a way out. At the end of the room is a staircase leading down, presumably to underground passages that you can follow to get out in another city. That would simplify a lot. So you follow the ideal of an idea and hurry down the steps.
The light lasts every inch of the way. Almost as if the torches are changed regularly so that this place will never be surrounded by darkness. You take the steps double, jumping down like a rabbit in its own burrow until you reach the bottom.
The air down here is stuffy, humid and musty, joining only a metallic note you can't place. In front of you is a narrow corridor that leads straight into another room. There are no junctions here, nor does escape seem possible. Nevertheless, you follow the corridor, hoping for a way out at the end, and almost start to run until the knob of the wooden door on the other side is in your hand.
It is frighteningly warm.
You turn it, open the barrier and it opens barely a crack before the pungent smell of blood and urine hits your nostrils. It is sharp, stinging in your eyes, gathering tears in your lower lids as you let the door swing open with a push and briefly take in the image before you.
All of a sudden, Killua's stories come to you visually, awakening wild thoughts that jump up and down. He told you about all kinds of things. Moments when someone was nailed to the wall by the arms and legs, howling because the rusty nails burned in the wounds. People squirming under electric shocks so that they would reveal information before the electricity made the blood boil and the flesh stew.
Across from you, heavy chains lie on the floor while thousands of whips and knives, nails and needles adorn the walls. Blood has drawn dried patterns across the floor, hangs fresh on some blades that have been neatly placed on a metal plate.
The sudden sigh behind you sends a shiver down your spine, cold and biting. “This is one of the newer torture chambers, because my mother complained about the noise that sometimes resounds through the house when she's trying to sleep.”
Quick as a flash, you turn and try to gain distance, but you don't get far before the click reaches your ears and you can feel the resistance against your neck. A collar of iron, just for you.
“Killua...I...” you begin, but can't find the right words. There is fear, uncertainty and panic about what he plans to do with you. The only thing that is certain is that you are in danger and you will never forget the images you saw almost visually in front of you just a few hours before, because Killua knows how to describe something vividly. Partially, you still can't believe it.
“What's wrong?” Uncertainly, Killua tilts his head. His gaze is normal, his pose casual. One hand he keeps hidden in the pocket of his shorts, while with the other he firmly holds the chain to your collar. The long-sleeved shirt on his body is dry, as if it had never come into contact with the storm out there.
“I'm sorry if I scared you,” he mumbles a moment later, and for a second hope sprouts.
“Let me go then,” you beg him, but there is nothing more than bewilderment reflected on his features.
“Then you would run away again.” He pronounces it as if it were natural to bind people you love to you with a chain. “That's just for your safety.”
Probably he's talking about the butlers and the beast in the front garden, all of whom tend to kill anyone who moves freely without permission. They would see you as prey no less than Killua does, except that he cares about you. At least that's what he claims.
“Killua...” you begin again, indecisive yet pleading. “I-I won't run away. Really, I won't. But you scare me.”
His eyes widen before he presses his lips tightly together and pulls harshly on your chain, causing you to stumble towards him. It's impossible to stop before you bump into him and the warmth of his body seems to warm a part of you. He doesn't put an arm around you, but you can hear his heart beating faster and feel him slowly lean down towards you.
“I won't let anything happen to you. You are mine and no one will take you away. Not the people on our journeys, nor my family.” The chain rattles as he eases up and places his other hand gently on your cheek, making you look at him in the very next blink. His gaze is full of care, but his words seem like poison in your blood. Because you know he won't let you go. Not until you are dead.
[picture is from a collecting card game] [Want to give me some Kudos? Visit HERE!] [You have a wish for my collection? Check up HERE!]
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clood · 3 years ago
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a little leopika piece for the prompt (that i suggested, oops) ghost stories under the cut! 
vague spoilers for the succession arc, not really anything important though so you don’t need it to understand what’s going on lol 
Kurapika is unsure how he found himself here, alone in the back room of Leorio’s tiny clinic aboard the Black Whale with a fussy Woble in his arms. 
Well, actually, he knows exactly how. Leorio yelled at him about it when he arrived.
Leorio is blaming everything on him, as he tends to do, saying that if Kurapika would just take a break already and stop wandering around like a zombie about to collapse, then maybe Queen Oito wouldn’t have absorbed all his negative vibes and collapsed. It’s almost funny to hear Leorio, a man of science and medicine, spout off such nonsense as “vibes” and “negative energy.” Had he attributed it to nen, or maybe some chemical imbalances in his brain, he might understand. But something as abstract as rancid vibes strikes Kurapika as just slightly to the left of out of character for Leorio. 
Now, he sits in the strangely reinforced waiting room of the clinic and stares down at Prince Woble, who stares back up at him with impossibly large and innocent eyes. Once Queen Oito had collapsed, Melody and Bill had helped Kurapika rush her to Leorio, the only person on the entire ship that could be trusted to care for her in such a horrendously confusing and stressful time. Obviously, they couldn’t very well leave the prince unattended, so she had been scooped up in Melody’s arms and came along for the journey. 
Kurapika had been tasked with protecting the prince while Melody went into the exam room with the queen, something about her wanting a womanly presence in the room had led Melody to relinquish her grasp on Prince Woble. A helpless glance in Melody’s direction had prompted her to shout, “Tell her a story if she gets restless!” before she disappeared into another room behind Leorio’s tall frame. 
Woble has since awoken from her slumber and begun to coo softly, although Kurapika is unsure if he can really tell the difference between happy baby babbles and the beginnings of a meltdown. They all sound the same to him, and this, coupled with the fact that he has not encountered a child younger than Gon or Killua in god knows how long, leaves him grasping at a topic for a story to tell. 
He settles on the only one he knows, but he at least makes some sort of an attempt at spinning a different web than he always has. 
“Once, there was a big family that lived in an even bigger forest,” Kurapika begins, offering the prince a finger to latch onto as they both settle in for a ghost story. “They were people of the land, and they existed in harmony with the spirits of the forest and the earth. There was no reason for them to venture beyond the line of trees, for the spirits and the people past the edge of the woods were foreign and threatening. 
“One day, a young man and his companion set out to find out the secrets of the world beyond, excited at the prospects of encountering strangers and fantastic beasts and otherworldly beings.” Kurapika pauses and studies the prince. She has stopped her fussing, gazing up at Kurapika as though she were hanging onto every word he says. He wonders if she knows what he’s saying, or if it’s all a blur of sounds and vibrations to her. 
“However, the forest spirits decided they wanted to keep the companion, so the young man had to venture out on his own in search of a journey worth recounting to his friend upon his return.” His heart clenches a little at the memory of Pairo’s final request. He can’t say with any certainty that he will ever have “fun” again. He takes a deep breath and continues. 
“The young man went out on his own, experiencing the wonders of the outside world for the first time, if even a little lonely. But, his happiness was short-lived,” Kurapika says. “Evil phantoms had invaded his home while he was gone, spiriting away his brethren--everyone he loved disappeared in one night, and nobody knew where they might have gone, or which of the sinister specters of the shade might have taken them.” 
Woble, now inexplicably asleep in Kurapika’s arms, makes a face. Maybe she does understand. 
“Upon learning this, the young man gave his life in an attempt to find his clan, but to no avail. Legend says he still wanders to this day, a ghost without a home and without a family.” Kurapika wipes at tears he knows he cannot shed and wonders how much time he has left to avenge his people. He thinks of Queen Oito collapsing beside him earlier, maybe the effects of Emperor Time really are reaching her as well like Leorio had somewhat hinted at before. 
Kurapika hears a knock at the door and lets in Melody, who relieves him of his storytelling duties to reunite the prince with her mother. He takes a moment to collect himself before he tries to venture out of the back room, unsteady on his feet and suddenly extraordinarily tired. 
“You know, the young man does have a family,” comes a soft voice through his haze. “That is, if he wants one.” 
“Excuse me?” Kurapika says, looking up to find Leorio leaning in the doorway.
“The kid in the ghost story you were telling the little prince,” Leorio elaborates. “It might not be much, but there are other lonely people he’ll meet and be able to keep if you get to the end of the story.” 
Kurapika feels a swell of affection he works hard to stamp down. “Tell me then, doctor. How does the story end?” He knows he should get back to the prince and that he has about a million other duties to attend to, but he wants to humor Leorio for a moment before returning to all of that. 
Leorio readjusts his glasses and pushes gently past Kurapika, settling comfortably in one of the chairs Kurapika had been sitting in. He motions for him to sit in the empty one beside himself. 
“Well,” Leorio begins, “he meets a boy abandoned by his own father who has a heart of gold and enough compassion to understand exactly where this young man is coming from. Then there’s another boy, with a smart mouth and enough trauma to justify all the evil things he could do, but who chooses to move past it and heal, despite the injustice of it all.” Leorio pauses. “Maybe this young man could learn a thing or two from the second kid.” 
Kurapika wants to smile, he really does, but he just can’t make the corners of his mouth upturn any more than to simply set his lips in a straight line. He hopes his attempt reaches his eyes, at least, as he looks at the man beside him. “Anyone else?” he asks.
“Oh yeah, I was saving the best for last,” Leorio says with a smarmy smile. “The young man meets an incredibly smart and handsome doctor who is on his way to becoming the richest and simultaneously most generous person alive.” He looks at Kurapika with shining eyes. “Together, these four young men with no real families or anyone behind them to cheer them on make their own, strange sort of family. They live happily ever after, healing together and going on all sorts of adventures.” 
Kurapika finds himself actually looking into Leorio’s eyes for the first time in a long time, rather than finding himself in the reflection of his glasses in an attempt to avoid meeting his gaze. He finds that Leorio’s eyes have grown even gentler than they were when he first met him, the eyes of a man who would give all of his limbs and then some just to see one of his people safe and happy. 
“I’ve never heard that ending of the story,” he says, unable to keep his voice from sounding thin and dreamy. 
“Well--” 
Whatever Leorio is about to say is cut short when Bill enters the room to remind Kurapika that their evening lesson with the others is starting soon. 
Kurapika glances helplessly at Leorio as he stands and quickly says, “I hope he finds it. This family you’re talking about.” 
Leorio only offers him a sad smile and watches him go, looking like he has so much more to say despite not having any time in which to say it.
When he puts on his usual, expressionless demeanor he dons before nearly everyone on this god forsaken ship, Kurapika realizes just how little work it is to let Leorio’s words wash over him and just how much he wants what Leorio was saying to be true. 
He wants this little family.
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iamwhelmed · 3 years ago
Text
A fanfic I’ll probably never write, but I can dream:
TL;DR Killua starts crushing on a new bright-eyed kid and, after a year without each other, Gon meets him and is insanely jealous.
Killua and Alluka unintentionally making friends with a kid that just won’t stop following them around. He leeches onto them. Killua is annoyed, but also this kid kinda reminds him of Gon, and when he tries to tell him to leave, he sees Gon’s face, so he falters...
Then months pass. Alluka was unnerved at first but now she likes him. He reads comic books against trees and she leans on his shoulder and reads with him.
He’s like Gon in the way that he’s always smiling, and he’s touchy-feely. But he’s not the excitable energy Gon is; he’s crossed arms behind his head, total fearlessness. Nothing breaks that smile, except for when he looks curious, head tilted to the side.
He and Killua are close, close enough that Killua gets nervous. He sees Gon’s turned back, hears him say “You have it easy, Killua”, and he can’t do this again. He can’t. Because he’s going to get hurt, again. He won’t be enough, again. They’ll fall apart if he gets too close, and Gon is still out there not needing him, not wanting him, and if it happens again then it will just confirm everything--
Except Killua doesn’t factor in the little differences between this kid and Gon. Gon was a small lit candle that grew into a bonfire, until he became a forest fire and burnt himself to ash. This kid is smoke, no place is home, but Killua is. He sticks to Killua the way rainwater wets clothes, the way cigarettes taint skin. He’s fog with a mind of its own, following Killua “just ‘cause”. Same thing he’s said for months, never changed. When Killua finally breaks down, when he realizes he’s let him in just like Gon because he’s trying to sacrifice himself to save this dumb kid from an attack he doesn’t see coming-- this kid gets mad.
Gon would have expected it, would have smiled, because friends don’t have to say thank you for having each other’s backs. But this kid doesn’t say thank you, and he doesn’t just understand it. “Friends don’t die for each other, Killua,” he growls, and Killua can finally see the difference, “friends live for each other!” And, to his surprise, because this kid is always surprising him, he handles himself in a fight just fine. He’s nothing impressive, just capable, and he walks back with a small, minuscule scowl and a hand on his shoulder, rolling it around.
“Don’t ever do that again,” he says later, eyes haunted despite how his arms are crossed behind his head, “we’re a team.”
But we’re not, Killua wants to say, because that’s how he is, because if either of their lives should be extinguished, it should be his. Instead, he says he should leave fighting to him, because he’s a Hunter, though he’s surprised the kid can use nen.
In response, he smiles at Killua and says “Yeahhh, but it’s more fun when we’re together, don’cha think?”
And that’s it. From there on, Killua allows this. He doesn’t replace Gon, not at all, because he wishes he were at his side, wishes he could see his eyes light up and hear his laughter. He extinguishes those thoughts, though, as soon as they appear, because Gon doesn’t need him, he’d outlived his expiration date. But, the thought of Gon tossing him aside doesn’t hurt as much anymore. It’s a dull throb square in his chest, not an open bleeding wound. A year passes, and he knows what this kid is capable of, knows he’d never ask Killua for anything. He has a little crush, fine. Gon taught him how to be a friend and this brat taught him how to have a friend. So maybe he gets nervous when he leans too close, and maybe he hasn’t told Leorio or Kurapika about him over the phone, and maybe he has specifically avoided talking to Gon over the phone because it feels like he’s cheating.
The universe thinks it’s funny, when the kid drags them to York New to see some fights at the Heaven’s Arena (”I haven’t been there before! C’mon! I wanna see the best go head to head!”), to drop Gon right at the front doors of Heaven’s Arena. The universe thinks it’s even funnier, upon Gon rushing to hug him, to have the kid blink owlishly and say: “Cheating on me while I’m standing right here, so cruel, Killua...”
To which he can practically see the multitudes of question marks sprouting over Gon’s head as he pulls away. “It’s not like that!” He says to Gon, then “Don’t say such strange things, you’ll give him the wrong idea!” he says to the kid. Because Gon can’t think they’re romantic, please no.
Alluka is laughing, and the kid raises a hand in greeting. “Yo!”
“Hi.” Gon seems really confused, still, and he continues to be until they start walking and talking, they’re introduced properly, and Killua and Alluka tell him all about their adventures. Gon smiles, and he seems to accept the kid pretty openly. Killua... is almost disappointed. Why would he be? Because Gon isn’t mad? Isn’t hurt? Why would he want Gon to feel that, ever?
Killua has no idea that Gon is confused about what he’s feeling, and he doesn’t know why but he’s angry, and he thinks it has something to do with Killua’s new friend. He sees him punch Killua’s shoulder before he wraps his arm around him by the neck. That’s normal. He did it to Killua all the time.
Maybe that’s the problem.
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illumisimi · 4 years ago
Note
Your writing style is so beautiful 🥰👏🏻 and the effort you put into every request is amazing! If you want to, could you do a Illumi x reader please? Maybe with a reader who’s quite timid/shy but a strong nen user when they need to be? I want to imagine the reader is good friends with Killua and Gon; so in the middle of fighting off a needle wielding assassin to help them out; Killua has to tell the reader not to kill him because that’s his brother.
- thank you so much bby, i really appreciate your words ! ♡
misunderstandings (illumi x reader)
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Your eyes watched in worry as they followed Gon’s body as he was flung a few metres away from his original position. Killua jumped into action at this, but even then, you weren’t sure how this fight was going to end.
What the hell was this guy’s problem anyway?
The three of you had just been returning from training in the forest when you encountered the tall, stick-thin man. At first, you hadn’t paid him any notice, thinking it was just another hunter out on a mission.
It wasn’t until he exchanged a few words with Killua that he suddenly launched a set of sharp needles towards all of you. You hadn’t quite caught what the two of them had said to eachother, but it certainly hadn’t been anything friendly if this was the outcome.
And so here you were, fearing what wast to come out from this fight. You still hadn’t made a move, thinking that perhaps it was best that you didn’t interfere: Gon and Killua were noticeably stronger than you, in your eyes, so you didn’t want to get in the way and possibly worsen the situation.
However, as you watched the stranger throw a strong hit to Killua’s abdomen, something had told you to do something. Anything.
Legs moving almost on their own, you ran up to the man as you charged up your nen. You had had enough of standing around and watching, so the best you could do was at least try to knock the living daylight out of the stranger.
As he was preoccupied with delivering another hit to the younger boy, he reacted a split second too late to dodge your hit, receiving a swift punch to his chest. From the sheer impulse, he was sent back a few metres. However, he stabilised himself with ease, turning his attention to you now.
Oh no. Had that really been the best idea you had?
You were unable to speak, nerves kicking in as you realised what you had just done. This man was probably a pro hunter, judging by his immaculate skills, and you had just hit him out of anger towards his actions.
His aura had immediately changed, and it appeared that he was far from glad about what you had just done. You took a small step back, preparing yourself for a sudden hit from him, anticipating the worst.
“Wait, Y/N, don’t kill him!”
Kill him? Hearing a familiar voice shout out from behind, you turned around to meet Killua’s trusting eyes. Who even was this guy?
“I know he’s attacking us, but he’s my brother”
Wait what?
“Your brother?”
“Yeah, Illumi. He went through the hunter exam at the same time as we did, so he’s trying to see if I’ve improved in terms of fighting”
That was all well and good, but what did Gon have to do with this? He wasn’t a family member, so surely there were no connections between them. It bothered you that someone was willing to attack another with no real reason, simply out of pure enjoyment of confrontation.
“Who is this woman?”
You turned your head back towards the taller man, who’s name you now knew was Illumi. His dark eyes didn’t show any sort of emotion, and it caused a small, uneasy knot to form in your stomach. Now that you were up close, he was actually quite terrifying. However, he had something to him that intrigued you.
“She’s a...an acquaintance. We were just training together”
“Oh. Well, I must say, you aren’t as pitiful as I thought you would be when you were stood over there cowering”
Feeling rather embarrassed, you turned your head to look down at the ground, so as to avoid Illumi’s stare that was now pointed towards you. He intimidated you to no end, so being near him wasn’t very enjoyable on your behalf. Ignoring his words, you turned to walk away from him, heading towards Gon, who was now sat up on the floor. 
“I don’t want to engage in a fight with you if you’re backed up by two others, I simply won’t be able to tell if your skills have been refined. I’ll be off then”
Still not believing what you had just found out, you watched as Killua’s brother wandered off, into the vast, dark forest. It seemed that the white-haired boy picked up on your surprise, and turned around to give you a sheepish smile.
Little did you know, you were to encounter Illumi a few more times that you had originally planned to.
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rae-writes · 4 years ago
Text
You and me, Me and you
Kite x reader
warnings : mentions of nsfw, mentions of death, slight angst
word count : 2.k
Authors note : I have a problem with commas, despite being a straight A student in my English classes, I still forget where I should and should not put a comma so please don’t mind if they’re in the wrong spot.
You met Kite when you were quite young. You were thrown out on the streets at an early age and had just been caught stealing. They would’ve beaten you if Kite hadn’t saved you, swooping down from the rooftops and distracting them. 
“GO!” the boy in blue yelled. He looked a few years older with long, snowy white hair that went down to his waist and a cap that helped cover his eyes. That’s all you saw about him though, as you quickly turned and followed his order. The mysterious boy followed, eventually passing you as you both ran from the townsfolk. 
You stopped a ways away, breathing heavily. “T-Thank you. My name is Y/n.”
The boy glanced down, seeming hesitant to tell you who he was. After a bit of catching your breaths, however, he spoke up, “Kite. My name is Kite.”  He continued to observe you before giving you an offer, “Would you...like to come stay with me? You don’t seem very good at being able to live on the streets.” 
Your eyes sparkled, “Really? You’d let me? I was thrown out not too long ago...so I don’t know much.” 
Kite nodded, motioning for you to follow him. You walked for a while before coming up to an opening. Upon entering, you noticed it was a sewer, which didn’t seem to be that bad. After a few more turns, you came to a dead end where two or three animals were laying around a small spot on the floor with some dirty blankets piled up. 
A grin broke out onto your face, “This is so cool!” In return, Kite himself gave you a small smile. 
“This is where I stay and now that you’ll be staying too, no one can know about this place alright? From now on it’s just you and me.” 
You looked up at your savior and smiled a big, bright smile, “Me and you!”
----
After a few years of living together, someone was waiting for you and Kite when you got back from getting food that day. The man introduced himself as Ging Freecss, a pro hunter. Kite had started pestering the man to teach him to be one, and after a while you did too. Ging eventually agreed, although you weren’t his “Official” students or anything. Soon, it was time for you to take the hunter exam. 
“I’m so nervous, Kite!” 
Said boy rolled his eyes at you, “It’ll be fine Y/n. We were trained by one of the best hunters in the world. We got this.” Kite stopped walking when he noticed you weren’t following, stepping back to stand next to you again. 
“I know, it’s just...what if you pass and I don’t? I don’t...I don’t wanna be left behind.” Your voice wavered as you looked down to hide the tears that were forming. “I feel like I just found you and I don’t wanna lose you.” 
A hand came down on your shoulder, “You won’t lose me.” Before you knew it you were pulled into a warm, brief hug. Looking up, you saw Kite give you a confident smile, “It’s you and me, remember?” 
You nodded, smiling back at your best friend, “Me and you.”
----
You both, not surprisingly, passed the exam with flying colors. You were very excited to relax and celebrate a little, but your mentor had different ideas. Your and Kite’s next “official” hunter task was to find Ging. He gave the two of you his hunter’s license and set off to go “hide”. 
“Find one of the world’s best hunters? Is he insane?!” You were, to put it simply, not happy. You and Kite had just passed the hunter exam, which took a month or two, and now you were being forced to play hide and seek? Seriously? 
“We’ll find him, Y/n.” Kite was rummaging through your guys’ stuff, getting ready for the hard journey ahead of you. 
“We will? In case you haven’t realized, he’s literally-” 
“One of the best hunters in the world. Yes, I know. Which is exactly why we’re gonna find him.” He stood, walking over to grab your hand, “You and me.” 
You sighed, but smiled nonetheless, “Me and you.” 
----
After a few months of hard work and sleepless nights, you and Kite had located Ging. The trip wasn’t in vain as you’d thought it’d be, as you had met a lot of friends along the way. There wasn’t anything you really needed to do after hunting down your former mentor, so the two of you finally had time to relax and celebrate how far you’d gotten. 
“Well Kite, you were right. We did it.” You were impressed with yourself, even more so with Kite. You never thought as a kid this is where you’d be, but you weren’t complaining. 
“Y/n.”
You blinked, looking over at Kite in confusion at his sudden serious tone. “Kite?”
He stood to his full height, walking over to you and holding his hand out. As soon as you grabbed it, Kite pulled you in close, to the point where you could feel his breath fanning on your face. “Y/n...I never thought I’d have someone to care about until you came along. These past years have been amazing to say the least so...I uh...would you be my girlfriend?” 
You stared at him in shock, noting his pink tinted cheeks and downcast eyes. He was just about to pull away from you when you grabbed the sides of his face, “Kite…” His eyes shot up to yours and you smiled, tearing up slightly. “Of course I’ll be your girlfriend.” 
Kite’s eyes widened, before he brought you into a kiss. It was kinda messy and definitely inexperienced, but you loved it. This is what you’ve wanted for years, although much to your dismay, he pulled away and leaned in to rest his forehead on yours. 
“You and me.” He nuzzled your noses together, going in to brush his lips against yours.
You brought him in for another kiss, “Me and you.” 
----
The night Kite made love to you was beautiful. The area was surrounded by trees with a crystal clear pond in the middle, sparkling due to the starry sky. It was unlike anything you’d ever experienced. 
“Are you sure you want to do this?” 
Carding your hands through his long hair, you smiled, “I’ve never wanted anything more than this.” The pure love that shone through the smile Kite gave you was heart melting. He gently pushed you backwards, laying you down on the soft forest floor. 
Kite leaned in, brushing his lips against yours, looking in your eyes with an abundance of emotion. His touch was soft, gentle as the two of you undressed each other in the light of the moon. It gave the impression that Kite was glowing, his beautiful white hair and pale skin sparkling in an ethereal way. 
“You and me.” Kite’s gaze was intense, something you wanted to get closer to and shy away from at the same time. The way he was making sure you really wanted this almost brought tears to your eyes. 
You’ve never loved anyone more than you loved the man on top of you. “Me and you.” 
----
You and Kite had really always been together, you couldn’t even remember the days before you met him anymore. So while this didn’t come as a surprise to anyone that knew the two of you, it still made you shocked and overjoyed. 
“Y/n,” 
You’re heart rate accelerated at nearly an alarming speed.
“We have been together for as long as I can remember and it’s always been the two of us. Maybe that’s why this won’t mean anything to a lot of people but it means something to me. So would you, Y/n L/n,” Kite looked up from his position on the ground, pulling out a glittering silver band, “Marry me?” 
You couldn’t fight the smile that overtook your face, immediately dropping down to be eye level with your Fiance. “Yes!” You weren’t able to say anything else as Kite basically launched himself into your embrace, the two of you falling to the ground while laughing happily. 
Kite pulled himself off of you, “I know it’s not much but…” he flashed the inside of the ring to you. Engraved on the side was ‘You and me, Me and you.’ 
Tears sprang, and you choked out a laugh. “Kite, it’s perfect. You’re perfect.” Wrapping your arms around his neck, you laughed, whether in disbelief that you had gotten so lucky or in pure joy you couldn’t decide. 
He pulled back, grabbing your left hand and sliding the ring on. “I was gonna wear mine but I figured you would want to put it on me.” Kite pulled out an exact copy of yours, engraving and all, just a little bigger. “You and me.”
Your face was starting to hurt from all the smiling you were doing as you gently took his ring and put it on his left hand. “Me and you.” 
----
Tragedies are a given in life, you just weren’t expecting one to happen so soon. The Chimera Ant came out of nowhere, Kite taking the blow as he tried to protect the three of you. Your entire world had stopped and you felt like you couldn’t breathe.
The single, torn off arm laying on the grass would haunt you for the rest of your life. Time slowed as you looked back to Kite and the thing standing next to him. Anger and blood lust engulfed you, both your and Gon’s nen spiking in rage. 
Killua knocked Gon clean out, which made you falter in your movements. 
“A wise decision Killua,” 
your eyes snapped to Kite, 
“Now take Gon and get outta here!” 
Killua turned and ran but you stayed rooted to the floor as Kite summoned crazy slots. You couldn’t leave Kite, you wouldn’t. However when his gaze locked onto yours, you swear you heard him say something. 
“You and me.” 
You choked on the air you were breathing as tears started running down your face, shaking your head violently. Number 2 was picked and his scythe materialized. His eyes told what more he couldn’t say and you felt your heart shatter. 
“Me and you.” You turned and ran, sobbing as you quickly caught up with Killua and grabbed both him and Gon. You didn’t let go of the boys or stop running until you reached the checkpoint entry of the NGL. 
After a few hunters arrived, you set off without a word, going back to the spot you had regrettably left Kite. When you arrived, nothing was there. Not even his arm. That gave you a shred of hope but the dread in your stomach wouldn’t disappear, even as you screamed out in pure despair, “KITE!” 
----
You, Gon, and Killua were taken to the place they were holding Kite. Shoot and Knuckle had found him a couple days ago, however, the three of you had to wait and were watched to determine if you could handle seeing him. Shoot released Kite from his nen cage and Gon was the first one to walk forward, getting slapped around by what looked like Kite but you knew it really wasn’t.  
Gon had left the room, his promise of fixing the man in front of you lingering in the air. It felt like you were paralyzed, stuck having to watch the man you loved stumble around like a puppet. 
“Y/n...”
“Leave.”
“But-”
“I said LEAVE!” 
Everyone filed out of the room at your request and as soon as the door shut, you broke down into sobs. What did they do to your love? You glanced up at Kite, pondering how you could get close to him without making him attack you. 
“Kite…” you forced your nen to grab a hold of him and walked forward. “Kite.” 
He started thrashing, growling at you but unable to move as your nen kept him in place. With the way he was now, you were at eye level as you reached your arms up and wrapped them around his neck. Miraculously, he stopped trying to attack as you nuzzled your cheek against his. 
“I swear, I will help Gon fix you. We still haven’t gotten married, you know. You’re...you’re still too young to go, we have our whole lives ahead of us.” You pulled away, grabbing his face, “We will fix you. I will fix you.” Leaning up, you kissed his forehead and backed away. 
Kite started thrashing around once more as you headed toward the door. 
“You and me, Me and you.” you released your nen and shut the door, hearing Kite trying to knock it down. You would fix him. Even if it killed you. 
----
It felt like years, but really it had only been around 30 minutes. You and Gon were running towards the place Kite was being held, with Pitou running in between. Again, it felt like years before you reached the large building and made your way down to Kite. What happened next made you wish you never came at all. 
“This man...This man is dead. He died in our fight.” 
There was a sharp ringing sound in your ears, and your throat closed up on its own. You watched as Kite swayed from side to side before falling to the ground face first. You heard a scream and perhaps it was yours but you paid no mind as everything started to blur. Not long after, Gon dropped to the floor.
“Kite is...dead?”
You nearly dropped as well, stumbling towards your lover and pulling him in your arms. There were no sounds as you sat with Kite draping over your lap, his head resting on your chest. Your body could not even produce the means to sob and cry out, everything was just numb. You didn’t notice when Gon and Pitou left, you stayed rooted to your spot on the floor while subconsciously rocking Kite back and forth with your body.
“Kite...it was supposed to be Me and you, remember?”
----
When Morel busted through your hospital room, saying that Kite was alive you thought you’d finally gone crazy. After his explanation though, you realized that you hadn’t lost Kite after all, even if he was in a girl’s body now. So after Gon recovered, you followed along with him to where Kite was staying. 
Gon motioned for you to go visit Kite first, so you let Spinner lead you to the room where he was in. 
“Kite? Someone’s here to see you.”
“Send them in.” His voice was higher than it had been, but still kept the rich sounding tone.
You quietly walked in, noting his back was turned toward you. He stood, maybe too soon for your liking, and turned. 
Kite now had pinkish red hair, with purple eyes and freckles. He was also...shorter? Your lips curled up, a small laugh coming from you. 
“What’s so funny, Y/n?”
You faltered at the mention of your name, finally looking into Kite’s eyes. “I’m taller now.” 
That made his lips curl up as well, “That’s what you’re worried about?” The laugh that followed was eerily familiar. 
You couldn’t stop the tears that started streaming down your face. Kite was actually here. Alive and in front of you. So why couldn’t you move?
“I know it’s weird. I look different and well...I am in a girl’s body now. But I...I hope that doesn’t make you run away from me.”
You glared, although your heart wasn’t really into it. “Seriously? We’ve been through everything together and you think I’m gonna run away just because your shape is different?” Your body moved on it’s own, wrapping your arms around Kite’s waist and lifting him up. “Idiot.” 
His laugh this time made your heart melt as you gently set him back down. The hand that caressed your features were so familiar yet so different at the same time. “You and me.” 
You smiled, fishing out Kite’s silver band from your pocket and presenting it to him, jokingly dropping down on one knee. “Me and you.” 
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animeyanderelover · 4 years ago
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Hi just wanted to say I enjoy all your posts and you did such a wonderful job on the last request I sent for hxh gon and killua poly headcanons I thought I'd ask again this time for a prompt for Kurapika Kurta. With a s/o who has been kidnapped but is a writer and in the spare time of their capture writes a lot in journals stories poetry . I thought it go great with this prompt in particular 44. “Escaping is all you think about, isn’t it? Always dreaming about it, always thinking about it?”
You don’t know how happy I am to hear this😊. Felt in a softer mood and that’s reflected in here.
Warnings: Yandere themes, unhealthy mindset, unhealthy relationship, possessiveness, obsessiveness, overprotectiveness, mentions of kidnapping
Prompt 44: “Escaping is all you think about, isn’t it? Always dreaming about it, always thinking about it?”
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It was a rather peaceful evening for you. Probably because you hadn’t tried anything the last few weeks, not trying to escape, not trying to somehow poison him. You had just stayed in the house and here and there helped cleaning up. And you could tell that Kurapika was clearly relieved that you hadn’t tried something. He hated punishing you. He was of course still cautious in case that all of this was just an act, but you from all the people knew the best that you weren’t lying. You had admitted defeat. A person could only endure that much pain and witnessing people getting killed before giving up. You admitted that your mind was filled with the thoughts of escaping, but you had decided to give up. You knew when a situation was hopeless. You wouldn’t be able to get out of this alone. At least you had one thing where you could let all your thoughts out because there was no way you would ever let Kurapika know what was going on in your head. You were talking about writing poetries, songs and just in general your thoughts in your journal down which was of course kept a secret from Kurapika. He was already watching over nearly everything you did so to have a bit of privacy with this journal was nice.
That didn’t necessarily mean that Kurapika was a bad person all the time. To some degree you could even understand why he was acting like this. Having his whole clan perished had for sure left some deep scars in his mind. You could understand that he was too afraid to lose someone else he loved. That was probably another reason why you had decided to at least physically stop trying to escape him. You felt bad for him. This boy was the result that showed what the cruelty of the world could turn people into. You guessed since you were a poetry writer and often needed to think about things in another aspect you were able to sympathize with him to some degree. Somewhere deep down in your heart you wished him to be happy. If you were honest with yourself, you couldn’t even hate him really. You didn’t love him, but you didn’t hate him as well. You tried to draw a clear line between your feelings so that you wouldn’t actually end up falling for him. But sometimes he made it incredibly hard for you to not bring your heart to flutter in your chest. It were those moments where he didn’t stare at you with those intimidating scarlet eyes of his and didn’t ramble angrily that he only did this for you and that he wanted to protect you. No, it were those softer moments where he showed that he genuinely cared for you. And this evening happened to be one of those moments.
“Kurapika! Please stop! It’s a bit embarrassing!”, you giggled out, not really meaning it. Kurapika on the other hand was too busy with placing soft kisses all over your face and neck, smiling warmly when he heard your giggling. Both of you were currently lying on the couch, you were lying on top of him. This scene looked almost normal and you could have almost thought that Kurapika was a normal and loving boyfriend. But his slightly too possessive grip he had around your waist reminded you that he was never really able to truly let all his dark feelings disappear for a moment. But in this moment it was not so painfully visible than in others. “(y/n).”, you heard him softly speaking your name. You looked him directly in his grey eyes which were shining with pure love at you. “I love you.” You swore that your heart nearly melted for a moment, the sincerity in his voice being a bit too much for you to handle. “I-I don’t know what to say.”, you somehow stuttered out, feeling heat rushing to your cheeks. For a short moment you were worried that he would be offended by this, but he wasn’t. Instead he gave you a small smile. “It’s alright. With time you will learn to love me and I promise I’ll always protect you.” Dear heart, stay still. “You know, you can be a real softie.”, you told him slightly amused, slightly flattered. Since you were lying on top of him you were able to feel his calm and steady heartbeat and the regular and long raising and fall of his chest. It told you that he was completely relaxed now.
One short glance out of the window told you that it was already pretty late. You really wanted to write down a new poetry you had come up with today. It was only an idea so far, but you knew that as soon as you would sit in front of an empty paper with a pen in your hand you would be able to make something out of it. But for this to happen you needed to get out of his grip as nice as this all was. You wanted to finish your day with writing something in your journal and then going to sleep just like everyday before. “Kurapika,”, you began and he hummed quietly,”I’m a bit tired. Can I go to bed?” Kurapika didn’t seem to like the idea very much since he had you right now all to himself. He pushed himself a little bit up so that his face was only a few inches away from yours. “Please just a few more minutes. Let’s stay like this a few more minutes.”, he pleaded. You didn’t say anything what he took as a yes. He closed the distance between your faces to press his lips for a short moment against your before lying back down and pressing you slightly closer to his body.
Your mind was racing with a million thoughts whilst you were brushing your teeth. The two main topics your thoughts were circling around were the poetry and Kurapika. Thinking back to the very intimate time the both of you had just shared together made your heart speed up a bit. You definitely preferred Kurapika when he was like this, he was so much more calm and understanding with you than when he was angry. You hurried up to finish your business in the bathroom and hurried back to your room. You walked towards the bookshelf and searched for something until you pulled out a certain book, tossing it aside and stretching your arm out to reach the thing behind it. Due to the black cover it was nearly invisible and you knew that Kurapika wasn’t interested in this section of the books. After a few tries you were finally able to get a hold on it and pulled your black journal out. You didn’t know if you were being too cautious with it, but you really didn’t want Kurapika to find it and read it. All of your thoughts, feelings and secrets were entrusted in this book here. You grabbed a pen and opened up the next free page, collecting all your thoughts before starting to write. It was always helping you to sleep better when you just emptied your mind at the end of the night out.
I have often dreamed of a far-off place
Where a hero is welcome
Will be waiting for me
Where the crowds will cheer
When they see my face
And a voice keeps saying
This is where I’m meant to be
I will find my way
I can go the distance
I’ll be there someday
If I can be strong
I know every mile will be worth my while
I would go almost anywhere to feel like I Belong
I am on my way
I can go the distance
I don’t care how far
Somehow I’ll be strong
I know every mile will be worth my while
I would go almost anywhere to find where
I belong
You read shortly through it, satisfied with what you’ve done. But now you had to hurry a bit. Kurapika could come in now at every moment. You quickly pulled the book out and stuffed your journal in it before putting the book back in it’s place. You couldn’t help, but feel relieved like every time when you managed to keep your journal a secret from him. You knew that he always checked at evening the area around the house to prevent possible threats from coming near it. Not like he would let them pass anyways. You had measured the time he needed for this, giving you each evening a time window from half an hour. Now you just had to wait for him to come back. You just layed down into your bed and waited for him. You glanced out of the window, looking at the dark forest surrounding you. And for a split second you thought you saw something moving, but you weren’t sure if it was just some tree or animal.
When you woke up the rays of sunlight were already tickling your face. You must have fallen asleep before Kurapika came home because you couldn’t remember that you had felt him joining you in bed. Did you fall that fast asleep? “I see that you’re awake now.” The moment you heard his voice was the moment you knew that something wasn’t right. His voice sounded tensed up. Another thing that you realized that didn’t seem right was the fact that he wasn’t lying next to you. He normally always stayed with you in bed in the morning until you were awake. You slowly sat up and looked around. Your heart stopped beating when you saw what had happened. In a mountain of books sprawled randomly on the floor was sitting Kurapika. He had emptied the whole bookshelf. But that wasn’t the thing that striked fear inside your heart. It was the book with the black cover he was holding in his hands, flipping through it’s pages. He looked calm, but his burning scarlet eyes told you differently. How much had he already read? Obviously enough or else his eyes wouldn’t have started to glow.
You were just staring at him, feeling your own heart drumming against your chest. You didn’t move, not even when he slowly stood up and walked over to you. Under his burning gaze it felt like your skin was crawling. His calm appearance and his glowing eyes made your whole body froze. He slowly sat down next to you, lifting the book until it was right in front of your eyes. Your eyes shifted back and forth between the book and him. Months of your thoughts were written down in this journal. Diary entries, confessions, hopes, everything! Why was he acting so terribly calm when his eyes showed clearly that he was mad?! “H-how?”, you stuttered out, not able to bring more than one word over your lips. “I saw you through the window.” The window? Wait, the window! That meant that you saw yesterday him! “I never knew that you had a journal. You’re really structured with it. You wrote even the time down. It’s really fascinating what you write down in here. I didn’t know you were into poetry.” You somehow knew that from the way he said it that he must had read the whole thing. He was still holding the journal in front of you and you forced your shaking hands to grab it and press it tightly against your chest.
It became eerily quiet and you were sure that you could cut yourself on the tension that was raising between the both of you. But the thing that terrified you the most was this bone chilling calmness from Kurapika. You would have preferred if he would have just screamed at you. “Escaping is all you think about, isn’t it? Always dreaming about it, always thinking about it?” You tried to make yourself as small as possible. His voice made you wish that a hole under you would just appear and swallow you. It was calm, but you could hear it in his undertone. The many emotions that he suppressed on the surface, but that his eyes reflected. Anger, disappointment, sadness, his eyes told you everything. You couldn’t stand his gaze anymore and looked at the book which you were pressing tightly against your chest. There was no need to answer his question. He knew the answer anyways. What was he going to do now?
“Give me the book. You aren’t allowed to keep it anymore.” You tensed up when he said this and tightened your grip even more. “W-why?” Your voice was quiet. “Because you broke my trust. I thought you had finally learned your lesson, but I was wrong.” He stretched his hand out, a silent demand to give him your only freedom you had left. “No.” It was barely a whisper, but Kurapika was still able to hear it. “(y/n).”, you could hear that he was trying to hold back,”Give. Me. That. Book.” You shook your head weakly. “Please don’t. This journal here is the only thing that keeps me from breaking apart. Isn’t it enough for you that I already stopped trying to run away? It’s true that I often think about escaping, but I don’t act on these thoughts. But I need this book. I need a place to write all my thoughts and feelings in which I built up during the day. Or else I’ll drown in all the shit in my head. I didn’t break your trust, not completely. Please believe me, I won’t run away. You already took away my family. My friends. My home. My freedom. Please give me at least this bit of freedom.” Silent tears had started to roll down your cheeks. You slowly lifted your head and looked him directly in the eyes. “Don’t let me fall apart.”, you pleaded with a shaking voice.
Again silence fell over you, your heartbreaking pleas hanging heavily in the air. You could tell from the look in Kurapika’s eyes that he was battling with himself about what to do now. His muscles were so tensed up that he had started to shake, sinking his head until you couldn’t see his eyes anymore, being hidden behind strands of his hair. You didn’t do anything, afraid that you would worsen the situation even more. So you just waited, the tension nearly suffocating you whilst waiting for Kurapika’s reaction. For you it felt like hours of torture, but in reality it was probably only a minute until he finally reacted. A reaction that surprised you. Before you could even process what exactly happened you were suddenly pulled against his chest in a more than just possessive hug. “Kurapika?”, you mumbled softly out, feeling slightly confused with his reaction. Since you were pressed right against his chest you could feel how tensed up he was and how his whole body and breath were shaking. His heart was ramming painfully against his chest. You slowly lifted your head up and instantly something wet dropped on your face. You needed a second until you understood that those were tears. Kurapika’s tears. He didn’t look you in your face, his gaze was still hidden from you under his bangs, but you could clearly see his tears falling down his face and dropping on yours.
“I’m sorry.” His voice was shaking, overflowing with emotions. “I didn’t know that you were suffering. But please. Please let me help you. I know that I am most likely the source of your pain. I know that I took everything away from you just to keep you with me. But I really just want to protect you. Please don’t torture yourself with your own thoughts. Tell me and I’ll promise I’ll try my best to heal these wounds I caused you.” That’s when he finally lifted his head to look you into your eyes. They were still burning in their scarlet color. But all the intensity was gone. Instead you could see the pain and the fear swirling around inside of them. The pain and fear of a man who had lost everything. “But you need also to understand that if I lose you...I’ll fall apart as well. Without you I’ll break. I’m already broken beyond repair and I know how it is to drown in your own thoughts and feelings. I know how it is to be eaten alive on the inside. I was in so much pain, but you... You helped me with my pain. You healed me. You do so much for me by only being near me. So please let me return the favor. Tell me what hurts you so I can ease your pain as well. I hate it more than anything when I see you suffer. Let me carry all your pain. I’m willing to break under it because as long as you’re okay I know I’ll be alright as well. You’re my angel, you heal me with your mere presence. And I’m your guardian, I’m here to protect you from every threat and even from your own thoughts. So please let me help you. Let me get destroyed. Not you.”
You were left speechless, staring with wide eyes at him, the tears falling nonstop from your face. It felt like an invisible knife was plunging in your heart over and over again. You had never seen Kurapika like this. You had never seen him so...so vulnerable. He was showing you his pain. His suffering. His own torturing thoughts. He had always tried to stay strong for you, but now you saw how hurt and broken he really was. You didn’t know how to react for a moment, just looking at him with tearfilled eyes before you did the only thing that felt right in that moment. Hugging him tightly back. Kurapika’s breath hitched for a moment when he felt how you were hugging his torso before tightening his grip around you a bit more and burying his face in your neck, wanting nothing more than just calm down in your presence. You had always known that Kurapika had suffered, but in that moment you realized that he was hurting so much more than you had originally thought.
( The song I used here is “Go the distance” from Michael Bolton. )
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static-fanatic-1 · 4 years ago
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Hcs of main four accidentally walked in on darling getting dressed or while in the shower? Do they act flustered and embarrassed and apologize? Do they just shamelessly walk in without a care in the world? Thxs!
Did I hear someone say scenarios? Yes? Good.
Gon:
You were changing in your shared bedroom, the date Gon wanted you to partake in an hour or so away. Like before it was probably wondering into the near by forest to a beautiful location. Then a picnic and some desert before heading off back home.
You sighed and pulled up your underwear, now fishing in your drawer for that one bra that made you feel nice. So caught up in what you were looking for, you didn't notice the slight creaking of the bedroom door.
Gon didn't seem to notice you either, so entrapped in whatever he was doing. So when you turned with that nice bra in hand and saw Gon standing in front of you... you were surprised to say the least.
You squealed and jumped from your spot, your arms quickly wrapping around your revealed breasts.
Gon jumped from his spot as well, finally noticing you were there. "Ah! (Y/n)!" He paused, his eyes trailing down your flustered form. Cheeks once pale now flushed a deep shade of red.
His arms flailed around to try and compose himself from the intrusion. "I'm so sorry! I-i didn't know you-you were in here!" He continued to apologize, his words morphing together almost incoherently.
"G-gon... can you please get out?" You tried to ask.
The man paused, turning to look at the door and then back at you. He repeated this a few more times, trying to understand he could have left at any moment. "Oh! I-I'm sorry!"
With that he dashed out of the room and slammed the door behind him. You stood there, frozen, cheeks burning red and your entire body flustered. Next time you would make sure to lock the door.
Killua:
Killua finally made his way into his shared house after a rather long job. He was emotionally exhausted, just hoping to find you curled up on the couch so he could wrap you in his arms and recharge.
Sadly that wasn't the case, when he entered you were nowhere to be seen. Not in the living room nor the kitchen. A small frown pulled at his lips. You must be in the bedroom taking a nap. He didn't mind as long as he could hold you.
The frown deepened when he didn't see you in bed, but was quickly replaced by a smirk when the sound of running water stopped. Walking his way to the bathroom he leaned closer to listen.
He could hear a towel being waved around, meaning you were drying off. Killua took hold of the door knob and twisted it, it was unlocked. Lucky him.
Without a care in the world he wondered in, a beaming, prideful smile stretching from ear to ear. The white haired man eyed you as you squeaked and tried cover yourself up. "Yo, (y/n). Wanna go out for dinner tonight?"
"S-su-sure! Now get-get out!" You shrieked, hands trying to push him out the door.
"Fine, fine! So pushy." He taunted, the cheshire grin he wore stretching even farther.
Kurapika:
You hummed to yourself to pass the time. Being stuck in this house will drive you mad, you can already feel it coming on. You feet grazed the floor in a rhythmic dance as you made your way in the bathroom. Maybe taking a shower would help you.
With an unsatisfied sigh you started to strip, your clothes being thrown in the corner. You pulled your arms back and grip the clasp of your bra, and with a quick flick you unhinged the arrival of clothing.
The door opened wide, a disgruntled blonde looming in the doorway. Almost comically your hands slipped and the bra dropped to the floor with a quiet thud.
Both if you started at each other, eyes wide and mouth slightly agape. Both of your faces flushed an unnatural shade of red.
You squeaked and rushed to grab your towel, wrapping it around your form for some decency. "G-get out!" You yelped, Kurapika just standing there and taking in the picture at play.
Once his brain caught up, a light laugh escaped the bellies of his throat. His feet dragged him closer to your form, his hand placing themselves on your shaking shoulders. "I need to take a shower too, you know."
Leorio:
Leorio listened from outside your bedroom door, he could hear the shuffling of your clothes as you took them off. He almost couldn't keep himself from rushing in there and taking a nice long look at you.
Your voice yelled through the doorway. "You can't get in this time Leorio!"
He chuckled to himself, moving to lean right against the door. "Aw, but wouldn't you want my help?" A perverted smirk stretching across his face.
"No I don't! I locked the door too, you can't come in!" Your yells we're almost too genuine for his liking, but he disregarded it as a reaction form his teasing.
Still he wanted desperately to take a peek, so with his nen he unlocked the door. Now without the lock in his way he pridefully walked in to bask in all of your glory. "Locked the door, huh?"
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ishouldgetatumbler · 3 years ago
Text
Kissed an cast into the sea
Fandom: HunterxHunter
Pairing: Mito Freecs/Illumi Zoldyck (Miumi)
Warnings: Alcohol, Illumi’s brain
Word count: 5343
AO3
1
      A man was sitting at her kitchen table. He was tall, even sitting he was nearly as tall as Mito. He was watching her with the palm of one hand resting on the back of his other. His hair was long and black; it seemed expensively cared for. His clothes were clashing, and poofy, but his face was all business. Mito wanted to curl up in fear of his big dead eyes.
      Right. Okay.
    She was standing in the doorway of her home, holding a fish by the severed fishing line. Her hair was tied back and her dress was sky blue with clouds drawn from spilled bleach and white paint. It was darker blue at the knees and below, where the marsh water soaked it through. Her rubber boots squelched on the tiles of her kitchen, mud caked wellington boots oozing onto the floor.
    Right. Okay.
    She set down her catch on the cutting board before stepping on the toe of her rubber boot and working herself free of it. The next shoe she stood on one foot to pull off with her hands. She set the both of them in a tin caked with sand and dry and turned to the person sitting at her table. 
    He was still there, eyes on her curiously as she stood in soaked wooly socks. The fact he was still there made the fear worse.
    Right. Okay.
    "Ging isn't here right now."
    The man cocked his head to one side, curiously.
    "You're not the first person to try this. I don't know where Ging is and I don't know how to find him."
    She'd said that to everyone who had come through looking for Ging. It was the truth, but she always imagined she could find Ging if she really wanted to.
    "Gon Freecs? Do you know where he is?"
    That was new. Gon really did take after his father.
    "No."
    The stranger looked at her reproachfully. He wasn't the first to believe breaking into her house would scare her. They'd come and gone, polite euphemisms for threats and poorly concealed weapons. She didn’t see any weapons, but the man was too calm to be threatening her without one.
    "He broke my arm." He added after a moment, still reproachful.
    She gave a tight smile with no humor or joy.
    "I'm sorry to hear that."
    The stranger continued to look reproachfully at her.
    "He kidnapped my brother as well. Boys really should not be taken from home at such a formative age."
    "Kidnapping? That doesn't sound like Gon."
    "I'm very certain he did. Killua Zoldyck?"
    Things clicked into place. She tried to remember his name, scrawled on loose leaf paper three times folded. Gon's handwriting was nearly illegible when he was excited. That name was in one of the three paragraphs reduced to squiggles as he talked about Killua.
    "Illumi is it?"
    He raised both his hands from the table, putting them up as if to say 'you caught me.'
    "Hi."
2
    He watched her as she gathered laundry for the drying lines, swept out the mud she'd tracked in and washed her hands again to begin preparing the fish. She hesitated for a moment before grabbing her knife. Good, she understood the situation.
    She scraped the scales from the fish with the same intense focus Gon had broken his arm. So it was hereditary. She laid the fish on its side, deboning it and gutting it with a few sharp moves. She glanced at the fish as she set it aside, blindly reaching for another. Her hand found an empty countertop, and she turned to Illumi.
    "Could you go to the market and buy another salmon?"
    Illumi cocked his head to one side. She didn't seem unnerved. "Why?"
    "Because I have two people to feed tonight." She grabbed her apron, using it to wipe at the bits of fish on her hands.
    She’d moved on very quickly. She knew he was dangerous, she knew he was after her son by extension, but she didn’t know why. It was probably in her best interest to stay polite, in case he was there to help. But she knew about him, she knew his name. How much did she know? She was offering him dinner, so it couldn't be much.
    He could kill her and puppet her, but maintaining that concentration would be harder than just waiting for his brother to return. Maybe a few needles, to make her more obedient. The Zoldycks were made to have power in any case. 
    He tutted his tongue as it occurred to him Killua would notice if he ever came back, and that attention to detail was why he'd tried to cut his prodigy brother out of the mix in the first place. Everything would be so much more… cooperative when he'd stuck a few needles in Killua's brain. He was twirling a needle now, spinning it end over end between his fingers. 
    Killua would be the head of the family, of course. Tradition had to be upheld, and it was easier to deliver bad news through someone else's lips. And maybe, for some mysterious reason, Killua decided never to marry or officially sire that duty would just have to fall to the eldest relative. And after having a son who could be heir, Illumi could-
     Illumi noticed he was walking back up the hill, holding a bag in his other hand. He stopped, instinct stopping the needle he was holding in the throwing position. How had she done that? He stared at the ground, at the foot worn path back up the hillside and he waited for the feeling of nen to crawl over him.
    Instead, he remembered what happened; his memories creeping out from hidden places like they were ashamed. He was embarrassed to see them.
    She had just… asked him to go shopping again. He replayed it in his head over and over, trying to piece it together. He was distracted, thinking about the future, and she'd said, very firmly, "You're just going to sit there and think, go out to the store already!" He’d idly translated this, before saying "Guáng  jiē", repeating the verb to indicate he'd do as he was told.
    He'd only ever spoken Chinese with his mother and grandfather, and both of them spoke like that to him. Was that all it had taken?
    Illumi started walking again; his steps short and angry. No, that was quite impossible. He'd worked very hard to remove such needless extremities from the brutal, exact machinery of assassination. Emotional blindspots were a luxury he couldn’t afford. The six dozen needles he kept lodged in various parts of his body were supposed to help with that.
    He stopped, before digging his heel into the dirt with force enough to fold sheet metal. He was pouting, he knew he was pouting and he was basically stomping and whining, but it was a Command. A command he had listened to. He never wanted that to happen again, that's why he did any of this. Power is just the ability to say No.
      Mito was halfway down the glass before she caught herself. She was thinking about the boys again, about Gon and Killua. Apparently her hands had grabbed the bottle and a pair of glasses from the cupboard. Scotch. She licked her lips, trying to chase it’s cruel taste away. The scotch laid plans on it’s own; oiling the inside of her skull to send her brain skidding across it.
    They were probably in the forest somewhere, having an adventure. Chasing rumors and stipulation through the wild places. She scoffed at her own fantasy: it would be nice if the world worked like that, but it didn't. There were people out there, intelligent motivated people, who only wanted to hurt people. As she thought this to herself, she saw Illumi crest the top of the hill, gaunt form holding a gently swaying bag. He might kill her.
    She took another drink and her eyes watered; at the taste, at the smell, but mostly at the fact she hadn't been strong enough to dump out the glass. 
    She could still see his silhouette from the road. He was tall, must have been more than six feet. His hands, fingers long thin and agile, sprang into her mind. It was easy to imagine them slipping gently around her neck. She gripped the front of her dress and tried to make that a scary image.
3
    She was sitting at the table: brown skin and freckles, soft red hair cut short and strange. He gestured with the bag. She smiled at him.
    "Thank you."
    He made a noncommittal noise and nodded his head.
    She stood, before walking closer, but he cut her off, stepping smartly to the counter's edge and placing the bag down on it, before looking at her.
    "Yú."
    Mito nodded, and took one or two slow, lumbering steps to the counter. He couldn't be bothered to count for once, he was busy watching her face.
    You were supposed to be able to learn alot from watching someone's face, but Illumi had never quite got the trick of it. He could tell you what a face was like, if he liked looking at it and what it was doing, but had no idea what it was supposed to mean.
He could see the redness of her cheeks. The glassy, watery look in her eyes. Her eyelids were puffy as well, agitated and swollen. She took a short glance at him, before turning back to her fish and cutting board. 
A moment later she said, "If you're just going to stand there gawking, go and close the door."
    Illumi was halfway turned around when he caught himself. There it was again: that emotional blind spot. He turned back to her.
    "You keep doing that. Do you mean to?"
    Mito’s knife dug in at the base of the fish's spine, and froze there. Her eyes went wide looking at it. Fear was an expression he knew, but it was a volatile thing: it melted into other expressions and emotions so quickly it was useless to identify.
    "No." She said, after a pregnant pause.
    Illumi considered this, rolling it around in his mind, this way and that.
    "You're lying," he concluded.
4
    Fear pounded at the back of Mito's mind. She would have a headache from it later, if the scotch hadn't already taken care of that. He was looking at her like a child inspecting an ant. She wanted to be angry about this, but she was just scared. He could kill her.
    She mustered the will to look him in the eyes. They were dark brown,  she'd mistaken them for black from a distance. His nose was small and pointed. His mouth pressed into a thin, expressionless line. She looked away, back to the fish before deboning it.
    He was tapping his finger on the counter. His body was contorted, bent at nearly every joint to put his face next to hers. His hair drooled down onto the cooled burners, and his eyes bore a hole in the side of her face.
    She realized he was offended, and was waiting for her to apologize. She, an ant to his eyes, had told him to do something, and he'd done it. This was an affront to his power and oh, he's a boy. Roughly her age too, by the look of him. Boys never liked to be bossed around by a girl their own age; they were sensitive about that sort of thing.
    Her mother and father had met in a similar way, albeit less veiled threats and mysterious intentions. She had walked into the wrong house, and was halfway through making herself a snack before she noticed. From her father’s perspective, a beautiful woman had wandered in and started eating his food. 
It was like that, the scotch told her, before she tamped the thought down. The giddy feeling still bubbled up out from under her heel and let out of her in a soft teary giggle.
    "What's funny?" He asked finally.
    His tone was calm, speaking like the sound of an iced over lake cracking. Mito's brain whirred, and her hands gutted the fish on instinct. 
    "I was just thinking this almost feels like a date."
    She shouldn’t have said it. She should have kept it to herself, but the sickening taste of booze made her tongue eager to move.
    Illumi took a step back from her.
    Oh. Oh. Why had he never thought of that? He had never considered she could be useful. He was daydreaming instead of planning. After he'd puppeted Killua, after his father retired as head and Killua succeeded him, Illumi would need to sire the next heir. 
    She had clearly raised a capable son. She would, as was tradition, kill his mother and take her role as matriarch and teacher. He could sculpt the next generation through her. It would be so eloquent. The same person he used to establish his power would solidify it.
    Illumi sat at the table, brushing away imaginary dust.
    "I suppose it is." He said finally.
5
    They had never said a word.
    Illumi had sat across from her, taking seconds and thirds without a moment of eye contact or conversation. He seemed to be judging her by the food, taking a moment or two sometimes to slowly chew, or try a sauce in isolation. He didn’t speak, perhaps waiting for her to crack. She could feel him watching her when she looked away. It was like the feeling of a spider crawling up your back.
    Mito hadn’t spoken either, but she had no idea what to say. Her drunken suggestion had been taken all too seriously, and she really didn’t know what to do now that she had been taken up on it. What was she supposed to say? "Why do you want to kill my son?" The answer was obvious: Gon had stepped in Illumi's plans, sprinting down the muddy road towards Ging. He must have done it a hundred times on his journey.
    And what about Illumi? What did he want in any case? Why sit down to dinner? She had decided not to ask based on a parable Abe had once told her, about asking a tightrope walker how he kept his balance. If you asked the wrong question, someone could die.
    She dabbed at her mouth, cleaning the sauce and fat from the edges of her lip. Illumi looked up, fork laden with breaded fish and seared vegetables.
    "Can I help you?"
    It wasn't a rude thing to ask, and she was genuinely interested in the answer. He was on his third plate in any case, When someone's belly was full was the best time to ask probing questions.
    Illumi set his fork down.
    "Do you live alone here?"
    Mito stood sharply up, turning to wash her plate. His hand was around her wrist. Her brain sloshed angrily around in her head as she jerked to stop, mashing into one side and the other. The back of her eyes hurt too, stinging and aching in turns. She tugged against his gripping fingers, the joints in her arm threatening to dislocate as she pulled
    "You're very strong." He commented.
    She looked back at him.
    "Yes, I am. Those who live on Whale Island are hardy."
    She tried to spin the inflection so that it sounded like they were a community. The truth was that she was so strong because she worked the pole barges and row boats by herself, refusing to split her wages with anyone. They'd needed that money once; doctors were expensive on Whale Island. Now that Abe was gone, she did it for the principle of the thing. 
    "You're angry." He said, slightly accusing.
    "Never touch a woman without permission, you're liable to lose a hand."
    He looked at her, and then cracked into a smile. She tried to not to be fascinated by that smile.
    "You know I live alone," she finally answered.
    Illumi nodded, saying "yes, I suppose I did. I was waiting for you to lie to me."
    The anger and fear were mixing with something in her guts, probably the alcohol, and the mixture made her stomach froth with undigested butterflies. 
    “I don’t lie.”  she said, lying.
    “Then perhaps you’ll tell me the truth this time. Where is Gon Freecs?”
    He wasn’t squeezing her arm, just holding his hand in an implacable shape around it; only touching her skin when she pulled against him. She tried to think, but found her mind stumbling back and forth over the warm pressure of his hand around her wrist as she pulled. She was still drunk, the processes of her mind mummified by alcohol.
    “Do you really expect me to sell out my child?”
    Illumi hummed.
    “I hoped you would.”
    Mito snorted, “You don’t know me very well.”
    Illumi nodded, and said “I suppose I don’t, but I think you could be useful.”
    He added, after a moment, “I could make you tell me.”
    For the first time, he tightened his grip slightly around her wrist. It wasn’t a painful grip, like sailors would use, it was nearly promissory; implying he could squeeze much, much harder if he had to.
    She could struggle, but part of her suspected he would tear her arm from the socket and that would begin the pain. He’d reacted well to an offer of dinner, perhaps he would be willing to sit through more. Or he would get tired of the charade and break her arm. The heavy meal was sobering her quickly, and aggressively apparently. She licked her lips, and tried to pitch the tone right.
    “Drink with me.”
    Illumi browsed over her liquor cabinet, and she busied herself with the dishes. Her pulse jumped when she suggested it, which meant she may have poisoned them. At the same time, he had no idea what he was looking for, and it’s not as though poison would do much. There were bottles of various heights all crammed into the cabinet, and at least a dozen of them were identical and unlabelled: frosted glass and rounded edges. He tapped a finger on his chin, and turned to look at her by the sink.
    She was humming to herself. It was sad, and the tone tilted and swayed like a ship in the sea. He could feel his emotions stir inside their cage. One of the pins in his chest twinged, regulating his heartbeat. He looked back to the cabinet, before pulling out one of the identical bottles from the middle of the pack. He set it on the table as she wiped her hands on her apron.
    "You can pick one of the nicer boozes." She said lifting his bottle to  inspect it.
    Illumi cocked his head to one side.
    "Isn't it what you use the most of? I imagine you'd be less likely to poison those. Not that poison would do much mind you."
    She scoffed, and delicately bit the cork and pulled it loose with her teeth.
    "Boaster."
    She made a good point. Why had he told her that? It served no practical use to mention, it was better to wait for the taste of poison. His father had once mentioned that he believed everyone could be seduced by power. This probably wasn't the seduction he meant, but Illumi supposed it would work. He could show his power to her, informing her the differences of their abilities.
    Gently, he slid his fingers between hers, around the bottle. She turned slowly to face him, her other hand frozen while rooting through a cabinet for glasses. He took the bottle, pressing the mouth of it to his lips and drinking.
    The taste was unpleasant.
    He set the bottle on the table without looking at it. Her eyes were hazel, not the pure brown of her son. They were looking at him the way Hisoka looked at everyone, though perhaps not exactly the same. She wasn't like anyone else.  After having this thought, Illumi realized two things. 
    One, his mother should have trained their tolerances for poison more broadly. She had insufficiently trained them for what she called "low poisons," or poisons people generally used for entertainment. This would be rectified when Mito was matriarch.
    Two, whatever they were drinking was, at least legally speaking, unfit for human consumption. It had more in common with disinfectant alcohol than anything most humans could safely drink. Perhaps Gon's remarkable tolerance was genetic.
     She looked him in the eyes as she turned her head slightly away from him, lifting the bottle and pressing it to her lips. She drank silently and greedily, and when she turned back to him, her mouth smelled of pungent moonshine. He wanted to kiss it. Instead, he took the bottle back from her, feeling the skin of her hands a much as he could before she relaxed the neck into his grip, and took his own drink. 
    Chasing the imagined taste of her lips, he drained the bottle through his Adam's apple, feeling it burn in the backs of his eyes and the weight of his stomach. He hadn’t been truly poisoned in such a long time, the feeling was nearly pleasant. He sat at the table, deliberately and carefully setting down the bottle with the care of someone who doesn’t trust his fingers. He adjusted his ass, having apparently missed the chair the first time. He looked up at Mito expectantly.
    She grabbed another bottle, and a pair of glasses, before sitting across him, apparently less drunk. She poured each of them a generous glass of ethanol flavored like sulfur. She drank first, taking a long shallow drink of the stuff. He matched her pace, drinking less steadily and more deeply. He could feel the tight pressed spring of his instincts and reaction time starting to loosen. It made him feel vulnerable, insecure. 
She was pouring him another glass, hardly looking at him. He furrowed his brows looking at her, trying to read her face.
    “What are you thinking about?”
    The clear, reeking liquid stopped in it’s journey to his glass, the bottle turned at an angle to stop it. She chuckled slightly.
    “Gon and Killua,” she said.
    Another needle jammed into the base of Illumi’s throat twinged, stopping a hiccup before it formed.
    “He would be safer at home,” he said.
    Mito chuckled.
    “I don’t think Killua would see it that way.”
    Illumi shook his head, before taking another few swallows of the stuff. It hurt, and the needle he’d used to stop hiccups would twitch every few seconds, hurting him to inform he was drunk. The tears dried behind his eyes made it clear they wanted out.
    “ I’m not talking about Killua. Gon. The boy. Things would be easier for me too if he was home.”
    He finally drained the glass again, and as he set it down Mito refilled it, expression blank, staring off at his chest.
    “We want the same things,” he ventured finally.
    She chuckled. It sounded like windchimes 
    “Do we?”
    He nodded, ignoring the pain of bouncing his head.
    “Safety for the people we love. A future full of choice. Power.”
    She chuckled again. It sounded like rain tapping on the roof.
    “You’re a very sad man Mr. Zoldyck.”
    Illumi shook his head, making himself briefly dizzy.
    “Nuh-uh.”
    “Drink up.” she said, in that ordering tone of hers.
    Illumi pressed the rim of the glass to his mouth, and paused.
    “You’re poisoning me.” he said after a moment.
    Mito hummed a questioning sound.
    “You’re poisoning me.” he repeated.
    “No,” she mused, “you’re poisoning yourself.”
     He surged to his feet, but drunk he was too slow. Glass shattered and her hands were wrapped around his throat. She had to stand on tip toes to reach him. He could feel the cool edges of her fingernails scrape the skin. She’d overpowered him. A needle he’d stuck into his hip twinged, keeping his cock flaccid. They froze for a moment. 
    “What now?” he asked, airways unrestricted.
    Mito looked him in the eyes, before finally answering, “you’re drunk.” 
    Illumi nodded limply.
    She pushed and he keeled backwards, losing balance like he’d never had it to start. His view of the world sloshed and slid, like his eyes were made of water.
    Why had he played this game? He would have never challenged father, or Killua, or even Gon to it’s like. Perhaps his mother. Perhaps any other woman. Did the Zoldycks have blindspots just the same as everyone else? That was a worrying thought.
    Fortunately, his head impacted the floor a moment or two after he’d had it.
6
    Mito tried to find her balance, her equilibrium apparently as drunk as she was. It swayed and tottered as her feet danced the sailor’s two step, then five step, then steadied her. She’d had to put her full strength and weight into shoving him over. His skull had dented the flooring. She wound one leg back and swiftly kicked him between the legs.
    He didn’t make a noise, just rocked slightly in place. Then he was good and unconscious. She waddled drunkenly to his other end and tried to weave her arms under his armpits. It took a few tries, between drunken guesstimation and catching, vinyl fabric of his clothes. Once she had a grip, she crouched low and heaved. His body dragged and Mito took it with her as she took a few clumsy steps back.
    His ass caught on the doorframe. She hadn’t actually thought this out past this. What was she going to do with him? Drag him out to a sandbar and leave him to drown at high tide? Drop him face first into a puddle? Somehow it all felt cruel. He hadn’t hurt her, and the fact he would if he could was hard to hold against him, seeing him laid out. In any case, he had to get out of her house.
    She relaxed, letting his head hit the porch wood. She stretched out her back, wishing she hadn’t been so damn hard on her body when she was younger. She looked down at him. His shirt had hiked up to reveal skin across his stomach, equal parts toned and scarred. He clearly hadn’t had a terrific childhood either. He could just be a victim of circumstance.
    She stepped carefully around his sprawled arm, grabbing a tacky high heel shoe with each hand before stepping back. She heard his head impact the wall as she tried to rotate him through the door, watching his body curl to fit. With a last, less-than-safe heave, she pulled him though. He would likely be in a lot of pain tomorrow anyway. Would a hangover and mountain of bruises not suffice?
    She squatted low again, and a little sobered by the work, she tried to lift him. Carrying it like Abe’s bags of sweet trout, she laid him across her shoulders. He was dangerous, that much she could be certain. She could write a note, explaining he would be killed next time she saw him. But he was well mannered, human even, under the odd clothes and blank expression. She started waddling to the port. She wanted him off her island at the least.
    She found a secluded jetty, a few rowboats with sailor’s most complicated knots tying them to the docks. She picked hers, farthest inland and threw, as best she could, 200 pounds of murderer into it. He landed feet first, the boat keeling and splashing as his full weight hit the bow. In a moment of surprise, she found her hands reaching for her apron tie, ready to strip the excess fabric and dive in to save him. The boat steadied. 
She stepped in, carefully to avoid stepping on him. She let out a sigh. What now? She could row him to the Gzana, drop him at one of the hotels near the port. She hadn’t brought her coins, and she couldn’t risk him coming too while they were halfway there. She sighed, looking back at him.
He was pretty, and that might be the hardest part about killing him. It was a shallow reason to be sure, but she couldn't shake the feeling it would be wrong. The world would be a better place, but it wouldn't be the right place. She traced her hand along the line of his jaw, feeling the steady pump of blood. She hadn't killed people before, and it was supposed to change you to do so.
He was very pretty, lips softly parted and long black hair splayed out like an angel's halo. It mingled with the water, cast across the boat like the shadows of night. His eyes, wide and disconcerting, were closed.
She leaned down, careful to keep balance in the small row boat, and kissed him. Then she clambered back onto the pier, taking a sharp breath to bring down her blush.
One hand on the dock’s pillar for support, she got down on her knees to unmoor the boat, and, as an afterthought, snatched one of the oars, before gently shoving the boat out to sea with a bare foot
The tide around Whale Island is different than it is around most land masses; the sea seems to ignore it, like a sandbar or a sea stack. On clear night at low water, it's as good as riptide for getting out to sea. Mito watched as the horizon, blurred by fading moonlight, swallowed her small boat.
7
    Illumi awoke to the scream of seagulls and the piercing pain of his headache. There were other aches and pains, spread out like paint smears across his body. Without open his eyes, fearing he would be blind with pain and sunlight, he stuffed his hand in his pocket and withdrew a needle, sticking it carefully between the ridges of his spine. The pain stopped, and he dared to open his eyes.
    A sky blue dress with clouds of bleach and flour.
The needle in his spine was not something he liked to use, he was liable to forget it was there, and pain was useful for keeping track of damage, but worst of all it stopped his other needles from hurting. The only way he knew his heart rate picked up was the feeling of it, hammering in his chest. He sat up.
The ocean surrounded him, featureless. He might have imagined it was heaven or hell if not for the smell; too imperfect to be either. He withdrew his phone from one pocket, turning it on to ascertain his location.
He’d missed messages from his father. That would be trouble, but it could wait. He flipped on the GPS, and tried not to sigh. He was nowhere near anything, floating in the international waters between Azia and Yorbia. He looked around, trying to take stock of what he had. One oar, an empty tackle box, and his phone.
Only one oar. Quaint. It left him unable to row his boat, only to meander in circles. No doubt it was a popular way for amateurs to kill, they generally don't enjoy the crunchy parts of the work.
For a moment, he considered calling his family for help, but he knew better than that. He took a few minutes to braid his hair, holding the phone in his teeth, before stripping and folding his clothes in the boat. For a moment he took the phone in his hand, ensuring he understood the direction he had to go, before smashing against the floor of the boat. It would never survive the journey.
He tried not to think about her, and found it vexingly difficult. She could have killed him. She should have, by all rights. He was a danger to everything she held dear. He cracked his neck, then his shoulders, then his back.
She should have killed him. Why hadn’t she?
He dived.
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narrators-journal · 3 years ago
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Unlearning
Hi! I’m sorry for vanishing, I went to hang out for a friend’s birthday, but I return with Killua content!
Sorry if it’s shoddy, I didn’t really have more than a vague plan when I started it, just wanted to explore the idea of Killua having to unlearn all of the bad shit his family had normalized in him, so I hope it’s at minimum enjoyable!
You were something of a traveling worker, so you thought you were experienced with hiking, driving, boating, just about any mode of transportation in all of your months and maybe years of getting yourself to new clients, but you'd learned the hard way that no. No you were not. However, there was a bright side to your failed attempt to take a short cut through the woods, you ended up meeting quite the cast of characters.
In total, there were four. First, a tall, lean man named Leorio who was a bit of a whiner at times but otherwise pretty creative with solutions to issues and pretty level-headed when it was really needed. Second, a shorter blonde named Kurapika who seemed to be the sensible one in the group, something of an older sibling to the last two, and the source of most of the non-sketchy or non-chaotic ideas. Finally, there were the last two, Killua and Gon, the youngest of the group and by far the most inspired when it came to plans, but they weren't always the most thought through. Together, these odd friends were really good at helping you get through the forest, but also quite the sight to behold at times.
Man, this trip is gonna be one to remember You thought on the third night of your walk as you helped Kurapika do the dishes in a small stream near your campsite, half listening to Killua and Gon argue nearby while Gon was finding rocks or something in the chilly stream water. You were drawn out of the thoughts when you overheard Killua say something that didn't sit right with you,            "Oh, so the years of physical and emotional abuse I've gone through aren't good enough experience for this?" That set your teeth on edge.            "Hey Kurapika, I'm gonna go see what's going on over there," you explained, putting the plastic plate you'd been scrubbing to the side while the blonde nodded and let you get up. So, you headed over to the shouting and arguing boys, "Hey you two, what're you fighting about?" You asked nonchalantly, making the two boys look at you like deer in headlights.             "Huh? Oh yeah, we're just talking about an...acquaintance," Killua hummed, his anger instantly dropped and his hands shoved back into his short pockets while Gon nodded,          "You sure? You seemed pretty heated,"         "Oh nah, it's fine!" Gon chirped, "Killua's just helping me learn to problem solve," he explained, and after a moment of looking between them, taking in their more relaxed expressions, finding no signs of rage or hostility on either of them, you nodded         "Okay, just wanted to make sure," you hummed, turning to walk back to Kurapika and help with the dishes again, leaving the boys to continue to argue or whatever they decided to do while your stomach was left to thaw. Later that night, you were sitting around the fire with Killua and Leorio, who'd dozed off on the forest floor instead of in his sleeping bag. It was quiet, only marred by the occasional snores of the older, dark-haired male, the crackling of the campfire, and the chirping of bugs while you sat and pondered over the earlier incident while Killua simply poked at the burning wood with a stick. Is it really my place to chide Killua on this topic? You asked yourself, I'm not exactly a professional, and this is DEFINITELY something a therapist should handle, but... You pursed your lips, glancing over at the young boy, he should probably know of the bad habit so he can work on it, right? Whether or not I'm overreacting it could grow into manipulation, so I should at least tell him about that. The thought made your stomach squirm, but you decided that you should gently point out your concerns. So, with a deep breath, you got up and moved closer to Killua while he was jabbing at the warm flames,           "Hey Killua?" You hummed nonchalantly, despite your anxiety of being out of line, and making the kid hum in acknowledgement,           "Listen, I know you don't know me well, but e-earlier I heard you bring up some abuse you've gone through-" He cut you off with a groan and a roll of his blue eyes,           "Are you gonna try to check on me? I'm fine, I don't need therapy and I'm not 'damaged' or anything." he huffed, getting that prickly air he commonly got whenever he didn't want to talk about something or was embarrassed, but you just shook your head and flicked a bit of (h/l), (h/c) hair out of your face if needed,            "No, I'm not going to pry into you or anything, I just...wanted to warn you of a habit I heard." you explained, getting eyed in response, so you just continued, "you see, the way you brought up what happened to you came off as somewhat guilt-trippy, and I just wanted to come and say that maybe you shouldn't phrase it like that. You might not mean to sound like you're pulling a pity card, but others can see it that way and begin to avoid you because of it," As you spoke, Killua's eyes turned from narrowed, guarded, and curious, to slightly confused. For a moment, the two of you just sat there awkwardly, your thoughts spinning in a panicked flurry of oh my god, did I overstep?! I don't know this kid that well, I should've kept my mouth shut! and Oh god, I don't want to have to explain this in-depth to a kid. but, Killua's voice suddenly yanked you free of that storm,          "Do...do I really come off like that?" His voice was uncharacteristically quiet, full of terror and shame, which sent a knife right through your heart as you nodded.           "I'm sorry to say that you do, and I just wanted to point it out to you so that you could work on unlearning it, I guess." you explained, fighting the urge to hug the scared looking twelve year old, he might bite you if you did. There was another, longer stretch of silence between you two, leaving you to listen to the quiet chirping of crickets and the popping and crackling of the flames in front of you until he spoke again,               "I know all of the ways to manipulate people, but...could you re-explain them? J-just so I know how to avoid them in my own conversations," he asked, looking back at the fire as he spoke to try and hide how vulnerable he must've felt. This poor kid, you thought with a sigh, but nodded nonetheless. After that, you spent a while explaining all of the ways you knew that someone could guilt trip, gaslight, or turn a conversation around. It wasn't much, but you did your best to give examples and ignore the look of growing distress in Killua's sapphire eyes as you spoke. In the end, Killua stood up, taking a deep breath and shoving his hands into his pockets again as he thanked you,          "I'm sorry if I ever did something like that to you," he muttered, but you were quick to shake your head,          "It's fine, really. You're young, you've apparently had an awful life, no one can hold your bad habits against you." you assured, but it didn't seem to be too comforting as he walked off into the trees. But, you'd done your best, and you'd told him what you needed to, so you just decided to go to bed and leave him be for the rest of the night.
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xyliane · 4 years ago
Text
AUgust 7: HAVE YOU SEEN THIS 12 YEAR OLD
PROMPT THE SEVENTH: CHILDHOOD FRIENDS wait how can you childhood friends au killugon, I asked myself, forgetting that I had a whole-ass idea in my drafts already. this one’s a proper fic, too (minus editing cuz l o l it’s an AU writing challenge, not editing challenge). T, aged-up killugon, modern day au. ft ambiguous descriptions of social media, alluka, kalluto, and leorio in killua’s corner, and zushi and spinner in gon’s, brief discussion of getting plastered and dealing with a hangover. 5000 words.
0o0o0o0o0
The first sign that today is going to be an absolutely terrible day, is when Killua wakes up with a hangover.
This does not happen. Killua can count on one hand the number of times he’s gotten so drunk he’s had a hangover, and most of them are the fault of his little siblings. Little siblings who are now living together, whose couch he is currently painfully existing upon, half too hot and his toes way too cold. And the couch is too soft, an old secondhand thing he’d helped Alluka grapple up the stairs months ago after they found it outside an old dorm. He makes a notch in his very sore brain to blame the current situation on them. Kalluto might be kind enough to let a drunk big brother crash with them, but Alluka has a devious streak a mile wide.
Yeah. This is definitely their fault.
One eye slowly creaks open, surveying his surroundings through blurry vision. Nothing out of the ordinary here. He’s in the pajamas he’s left with Alluka forever ago, curled up under an old blanket he gave her for Nanika’s birthday. It’s covered in the Matrix code, all green letters on black wool. It barely covers him from chest to knees, which explains the cold toes.
Sunlight flickers through the curtains, cheerful and bright, and Killua pulls the blanket over his face. He’ll take cold toes over being blinded by his headache.
The second sign that today is going to be an absolutely terrible day, is when a noise like a chainsaw burrowing through a marshmallow erupts from his phone buzzing on the coffee table, just barely out of reach.
Killua attempts to bury himself under the blanket. He’s not dealing with work today.
And then he remembers: He doesn’t have work. Work can’t bother him today. Not just because it’s a weekend—work never respected the sanctity of weekends, no matter that he was at least partially in charge and used to have a fancy degree hanging on his wall. He doesn’t have work anymore. Killua quit.
Which, well. That explains the hangover.
He’s still blaming his siblings.
His phone buzzes loud enough to break the sound barrier, and Killua decides, fuck it. He doesn’t have anything to lose. If it’s the-place-formerly-known-as-work, he can delete everything. If it’s Mom or Father, he can definitely delete everything. And maybe it’s a friendly person, congratulating him on giving up a job that for anyone else would have been an absolute money-making dream. He’ll delete those too.
It takes a few tries to unlock his phone, and it unfortunately involves opening his eyes, squinting against the glaring light of the screen. But once he does, he frowns. Maybe he’s seeing double. Or a hundredfold. Because he should not have this many notifications.
awwww cute, i hope u 2 find each other! the top one says. It has several hundred likes. Why is it in his notifications?
Scrolling down reveals that it’s not an anomaly.
wtf man how can you find a TWELVE YEAR OLD from FIFTEEN YEARS AGO.
Me and my mom went on a cruise around there once, it was really pretty!
this is so sweet T__T maybe this is him?
And then another hundred photos of brown-skinned men with varying degrees of shirt-wearing, all black haired and most of them buff in very appealing ways and all of them beaming at Killua.
“What the fuck,” Killua croaks as he scrolls through all of the images and messages. Maybe this is a dream. A really weird, hangover-induced dream about how little of a social life he has, that his phone is possessed by someone else’s. A warning of sorts, that he should never have installed any social media on his phone ever, not even for hookups.
The reason for all the notifications lies at the top of his own page. Just a few sentences, all-caps, with an image of an old crinkled photo of two boys on a tropical beach, grinning at the camera. Killua sees himself, white curly hair flying in all directions and pale skin sunburned and ruddy with the briny wind, happier than Killua can ever remember being. Next to him, one arm slung around his shoulders and the other holding a bucket full of seashells, is a brown-skinned boy with freckles dancing across his nose and the tops of his shoulders, brown eyes wide and laughing and black hair thick and spiked from some mix of wind and seawater and natural gravity defiance.
He didn’t know he still had this photo. It had followed him from childhood all the way through grad school, a carefully guarded keepsake hidden away from the watchful eyes of his parents and Illumi, before ending up in a box or a bag at some point in the last few years. Part of Killua thought he’d lost it in the move. He barely remembers much about being twelve, about the cruise he’d been forcibly dragged on. But he remembers…
HAVE YOU SEEN THIS BOY? yells the caption. WE WERE BEST FRIENDS FOR A WEEK WHEN I GOT DRAGGED ON A CRUISE BY MY ASSHOLE PARENTS. HE WAS 12 ON WHALE ISLAND 15 YEARS AGO. IF FOUND, DM IMMEDIATELY.
“Gon,” Killua breathes.
He gathers himself, wrapping the blanket around his head in a feeble protection against the morning, and lurches over to Alluka’s room.
He gets to bang on her door three times, confused spite winning out over his own pounding headache, before Kalluto appears out of their room, blinking blearily at Killua. “Shut up.”
Killua kicks Alluka’s door for good measure, and brandishes his phone in front of him like a weapon. “Not until you explain what the hell this is doing on the internet.”
Kalluto pales, then flushes, then pales again. “Oh. Um.”
At that, Alluka creaks her door open, guilty blue eyes far too awake for how close to noon it is. Killua kind of wants to kill her on principle alone. If he has to be hungover, so does everyone else.
“Explain,” he grinds out through his teeth.
The third and final sign that today is going to be an absolutely terrible day, is when Alluka puts on her most winning smile, the kind she uses to ward off angry customers and idiotic faux-academics on the internet. “Congratulations, Brother! I might have made you go viral.”
Killua throws his phone at her.
—————
Today’s going to be a good day, Gon decides. He’s been in the forests of East Gorteau for the better part of a month, which normally isn’t so bad. But this group has been…They’re nice enough, when Gon’s not spending half of his time explaining that, no, that species of plant does not make a good stew, and no, that species is endangered please don’t hunt them, and yes Gon is sure he doesn’t date his clients even after the hike, and no the reason the tent fell over again is because it wasn’t properly set up in the first place—
All of Aunt Mito’s complaints about tourists on Whale Island make so much more sense, now that Gon’s leading backwoods hikes.
But last night had been fun! Spinner had met the group at a pre-set campsite not far from their pickup so Gon hadn’t had to work the whole night, and he could relax with his friend over good food, more alcohol than he probably should have drunk, and not having to explain to Mrs. Yuldvin the difference between marijuana, buckeye, and poison oak again. Spinner had even taken care of the fire, although she had left him to rescue the Podomos siblings from the ruins of their tent with nothing more than a smirk and a wave. Nevertheless, Gon smiled through his headache all morning, because soon he’ll be home, and he can sleep.
Zushi is waiting in the parking lot once Gon’s done packing up the last of the gear and saying goodbye to Spinner, jeep idling while he flicks through his phone, thick eyebrows drawn together in increasing concern. He doesn’t even look up until Gon drops his pack onto the hood of the car, and he jolts so badly in surprise that he tosses his phone in the air.
“Are you okay?” Gon asks, and tries to peek at the screen.
Zushi pulls it up and away, a frantic look in his eyes. It won’t really keep Gon from seeing what’s happening, not if he wants to, but Zushi’s height is enough of a deterrent to make it hard. “You were gone way too long,” he says.
Gon leans against the hot metal of Zushi’s car. It wasn’t an unusual length for a trip, not really—this backcountry needs the length to be able to see and understand the region. Not to mention the Small Billed Swan preservation society keeping the whole place locked down except to authorized guides and trekkers. Zushi knows this. They’ve been roommates long enough that this isn’t even the longest time Gon’s been gone.
“You knew I’d be gone til today,” Gon says.
“Yeah, but…” Zushi’s eyebrows descend even further, scrunching his whole face up in worry. “You haven’t checked your phone, right?”
“No?” Even if he did have cell service, Gon never brings his own phone. He borrows Kite’s satellite phone, because it is more reliable and doesn’t need to be charged constantly.
“Okay. Well.” Zushi takes a deep breath, then another, one of Wing’s old meditation techniques. Despite his exhaustion and single-minded determination to sink into a real bed and sleep for a week, Gon feels a minor pang of worry. On breath three, he unlocks his phone and turns it towards Gon. “You’re a meme.”
On Zushi’s screen is a photo Gon can’t ever forget about. Backed by Whale Island’s sunbleached white beaches and the humid brilliant colors of summer, Gon sees himself—twelve, smiling from ear to ear, hair a mess from swimming and his shirt practically covered in sand from digging up all the seashells in his bucket. He’s got an arm around another boy, who’s caught mid-laugh so his blue eyes burn the same color as the sky, white curls even messier than Gon’s hair. They look like they’ve known each other their whole lives, like they’d still be best friends even if they haven’t seen or spoken to each other since the photo was taken.
Gon hopes Killua thinks so, too.
He cradles the phone in his hand, carefully zooming in on their faces and the errant crinkles visible through the photo. His own faded copy is in a drawer, having survived a whole trip around the world and countless apartment jumps. This one looks just as well cared for, in its own way.
“That…is you, right?” Zushi asks carefully. “Because Wing was asking, and half of Kite’s guide company is yelling about it on your social media page that you don’t even use, and now people are messaging me, and they’re saying the weirdest things, and the post is from last week, so—”
“It’s Killua,” Gon says. A smile spreads across his face, a mirror to the one he’d had when he was twelve. “That’s Killua!”
“Who?” the others ask, but Gon isn’t listening.
He spins, frantically searching his pockets for his phone. “Spinner, can you do me a favor?”
She narrows her eyes suspiciously.
Gon knew today was going to be a good day.
—————
It’s been a week, and Killua has quit all social media forever.
The steady buzz of his phone informing the apartment of his notifications is not his problem. Alluka’s the one who decided to hack into his phone and post something to his old public account, the one he mostly uses for photos of cats and complaining about terrible business precedents. He hasn’t posted much since school, and if anything, it should have simply vanished into the void of the internet.
He finds the culprit fairly quickly, and for once it’s not his sister’s moderate but dedicated video following.
“Old man, what the fuck is wrong with you?”
Leorio lounges in Alluka and Kalluto’s living room, freshly out of his scrubs and looking pleased as all hell. “I just reblogged a fun post from my friend,” he says somewhat defensively. “You were a cute kid, Killua. What happened?”
Killua feels a growl creep up his throat. “You can’t just do that,” he snaps.
“It’s not my fault the people like my well-coiffed but rugged appearance and dedication to social justice in medicine.”
“You have 500,000 followers because you made a joke post two years ago, and some authorized user reblogged it five times. It has nothing to do with your ugly mug.” If Killua squints and plugs his ears, he can even see why people think Leorio’s attractive or whatever: tan skin, lean but strong as hell, actually takes care of his hair, not to mention a damn good doctor with one of the most prestigious institutions in Yorknew who spends most of his free time running health clinics in impoverished neighborhoods. That’s all swell. But then he starts talking, and Killua has no idea where the off button is.
Leorio spreads a hand out, gesturing vaguely with the glass of iced tea that he’d helped himself to out of Alluka’s stash. “It has everything to do with my ‘ugly mug,’” he says. “Which is why I used my powers for good and spread your post. Don’t you want to find him?”
“Not like this!”
“You were not going to find him at all,” Kalluto’s quiet voice pipes up from the kitchen. They have night classes tonight, but Killua has a feeling that even if they were supposed to be attending their Yorknew Uni lectures, they would still be here making Killua’s life worse. “You’ve had that picture for years, and you did not even try to look.”
Leorio gives him a judgmental look over the tops of his stupid tiny glasses. “You haven’t?”
It would be a losing game to bury his burning face in one of the throw pillows, so Killua does his best to cross his arms over his chest and glower instead. “I…tried.”
“And?”
“I don’t even know his last name!” Killua splutters. “I didn’t have his number or where he was from, other than his mom worked on the ship. And that cruiseline went bankrupt and liquidated everything before I could get out of the house, so I couldn’t even look that up.”
Kalluto crosses over from the kitchen and perches like a sweatshirt-wearing crow on the coffee table, their blue eyes carefully neutral under straight black bangs. “Alluka and Nanika would have helped. Or even Milluki, if you had explained the situation.”
“I was eighteen, okay? I just left home, and our parents were still being…shit, themselves, I guess.” He hadn’t even considered asking for help. Then again, he’d tried the moment he could, that first summer of undergrad where he didn’t have to come home and Illumi couldn’t spend half his time breathing down the back of Killua’s neck. He had a general idea of where they’d gone, maps of islands scurried away in the closet with the old photo and a bag full of seashells Gon had given him as a going-away present.
They’d been friends for a week, in the whirlwind way that only kids can be. The cruise ship was massive, and Killua’s parents were in meetings half the time and playing nice with the other rich people on board the other half. Killua had been bored witless, and Gon was everything he couldn’t have possibly imagined: encouraging Killua to go exploring, to stealing food from the kitchens, making him help clean up the decks, playing cards with the deckhands. Sneaking off the boat to visit an island without Killua’s parents while the ship was docked, scrambling over the burning hot sands and dashing through the jungle, diving into the waves fully clothed and competing to see who could find the biggest prettiest shells. Gon’d been Killua’s first friend, his first crush, his first…a lot of firsts.
Then the cruise had ended, and Killua forgot to give Gon his phone number. His address. Anything. They’d been so swept up in being friends, being best friends, it had seemed impossible that they would never see each other again.
Does Gon even remember? Why should he, when Killua hasn’t contacted him? Would they even be friends anymore?
Maybe he hadn’t searched hard enough. But part of Killua thinks he shouldn’t have tried at all.
The phone buzzes loudly, and Killua tries not to flinch.
“Hey, Killua. It’s okay.” Leorio leans forward, hands clasped over his too-long limbs and expression gentle. “If you want me to delete it, I will. Not sure I can help with the viral part of things, except maybe go through your messages and delete the gross ones, or at least find the weirdest ones for you to laugh at later.”
“Alluka and I have been doing this already,” Kalluto says, their posture a little too protective for Killua’s raw nerves at this point. “But perhaps you have some suggestions for what to do next, Dr. Paladiknight?”
Leorio smiles sympathetically. “Don’t read the comments? That said, most of your comments have been much more positive than anything I usually post. The masses seem to be genuinely rooting for you, kid.”
“I have only had to delete a dozen lewd messages for you this morning,” Kalluto adds, not mentioning the hundred or so that Alluka took care of yesterday.
Killua’s traitorous phone buzzes again, and that’s it. Time to bury himself in a pillow. Killua flops onto the couch, narrowly missing Leorio, and does his best to burrow into the cushions. “That’s just great,” he says into the fabric.
A comforting hand rubs against his hair, messing up the curls for a moment, and Killua refuses to admit that it’s nice, that he has friends like Leorio who even bother to care. “It could be worse. You could be dealing with this while still working a soul-sucking job making more money than most of us will see in our lifetimes, in exchange for giving up all of your morals.”
Killua groans loudly. “I’m not having this conversation with you.”
“You’re gonna need to do something, Killua! And hey, I might be able to set something up with my—”
“I already told you, no.”
“But it’s what you’re good at. And you wouldn’t be fucking people over to do it.”
“No.”
“Just listen for one—”
Killua lifts his head enough to glare as murderously as he can at Leorio. It must work at least a little, because the doctor shuts up.
Meanwhile, Kalluto is scrolling through Killua’s phone, poking at the screen occasionally. In the awkward silence, their sharp gasp is loud enough to shatter a window, and they hurriedly shove the phone in the pocket of their oversized sweatshirt.
Leorio raises an eyebrow. “Everything okay?”
Kalluto squeezes their eyes shut for a moment, then carefully places the phone on the coffee table, screen pointed innocently at the ceiling. “You will want to look at this one, Brother.”
“This isn’t another erotic sandcastle is it?” he says.
Kalluto shakes their head, and Killua’s stomach lurches up his throat. Alluka has been the one excited about this whole thing. But Kalluto, as reserved as they are, is a massive romantic. The whole thing might be Alluka’s fault, but Killua knows it’s Kalluto who almost lets themselves believe it’ll work. Despite all of the false positives, the people who send messages that don’t sound right or photos that have the wrong smile.
Killua doesn’t want to hope. It can’t possibly be Gon. But his hands shake nonetheless as he unlocks his phone and finds a new message in his DMs.
It’s not from Gon.
Instead, someone with the icon of a small-billed white swan in a soft small-billed hat and a handle of @flymypretties has sent a photo of a brown-skinned man with spiky black hair absolutely covered in dirt and grime. He’s waving at the camera, a backpacking bag propped against his shoulder and the widest smile Killua has ever seen beaming straight through the screen and into his chest. Next to him and half out of frame, a tall tanned man with massive black eyebrows and a tank top showing off an impressive amount of muscle has his head in his hands. Killua feels a sharp stab of sympathy, somewhere buried beneath the racing of his heart.
look im sorry about this but this idiot can’t find his phone and we r kind of in the middle of nowhere so reception’s shit. he wants to know if you admit he found the biggest seashell on the beach, whatever that means.
For a long, long moment—seconds? minutes maybe?—Killua can do nothing but stare at the screen of his phone. Leorio and Kalluto both look at him with a mix of curiosity and worry, Kalluto starting to slowly reach for the phone.
In a completely childish protective moment, Killua grabs it against his chest, like the image will vanish if he doesn’t keep it close.
“Is it…?” Leorio asks.
Killua swallows heavily, trying to think around the roaring of the ocean in his ears. “I think so,” he says faintly.
Kalluto’s eyes widen, and they spin on their heels towards their room. “I’m calling Alluka!”
—————
“Has he responded?”
“No!”
“…what about now?”
Spinner throws her hands in the air so violently that her hat falls off. “For god’s sake, Gon, it’s been an hour, you don’t even have your phone, and you still need to go home.”
Gon huffs and pouts. They’re still in the parking lot over an hour after the rest of the trekking group has left, and all the exhaustion that had settled into Gon’s body from the tour has been turned into a jittery energy that keeps trying to leak out from under his skin. He wants to go home immediately and dig out his copy of the photo, rub out the old fingerprints he and Aunt Mito have left on it over the years. He wants to find his phone and message Killua directly. He wants to wait right here until Killua responds, no matter how long it takes.
He knows it’s childish, to be this selfish. Spinner has work to do, work that she already put on hold to help with the last day of the tour. Kite probably will want to know what’s happening, or at least why his lead guide and his chief guide organizer have been stuck in a parking lot. And Gon can practically feel Zushi’s obsessive scrolling through social media, frantically trying to navigate Gon’s feeds without actually having access.
Gon needs to find his phone.
“Spinner, what if—”
It’s not that Spinner’s a large woman. Out of the three people standing in the parking lot, Zushi’s far and away the strongest, even if he is about as threatening as a large, muscular teddy bear. And Gon has only packed on weight and muscle over his years of backpacking around the wilderness, no matter that he’s not super tall. But Spinner goes for longer, harder treks on her own than anyone but Kite, and she packs in her own climbing gear on top of that, so when she tosses Gon into the back of Zushi’s jeep, he flies.
“Zushi,” she says in a low exhausted snarl, and he jumps right off the hood of his car. Gon probably would have felt bad for him, if everything wasn’t spinning. “If you do not take your roommate home, I am not responsible for the consequences.”
“What if you hear back?” Gon groans around the aches in his side.
Spinner rolls her eyes, and Gon knows she’s just tired. “I’ll let you know.”
“But what if my phone’s gone? What will I do if someone stole it, or if I can’t—”
“I’ll call you go home already,” she says, and slams the door shut on his face.
For a long moment, the only sound is Spinner storming away, boots thudding heavily in the dirt until her car door slams.
The jeep shifts slightly as Zushi quietly lowers himself into the driver’s seat and puts the key into the ignition. Gon wants to tell him to follow Spinner, so she can yell out the window as soon as Killua gets back to her. But Zushi looks about ready to bolt. So Gon slumps back in the seat, the rumble of tires crunching through gravel making his already jittery nerves shake.
A small voice that sounds a lot like Kite tells Gon that it’s better to wait, that it will be easier to have a conversation and determine if this really is Killua after a rest and a shower.
Gon doesn’t want that, though. He wants…
It’s been a long time since he was on Whale Island. Longer still since he saw Killua. That doesn’t mean he stopped thinking about either of them, during the quiet moments out under the stars. They’re part of him, like his lungs are part of him—essential and irreplaceable, buried so far inside that removing them would change him irrevocably.
What is Killua like now? Is Gon just as important to him as he is to Gon? He has to be. Right?
They make it home without saying anything else. Gon floats in and out between bone-deep weariness and electric sparks of nervous joy, and Zushi flinches every time Gon jolts himself from one to the other.
“Hey, are you…I mean, maybe not okay, but.”
Gon lifts his chin up sharply at the sound of his roommate’s voice, and notices the familiar apartment complex in front of him. Oh, they’re home. “I’m good,” he says, and grins.
“Sure,” Zushi says like he doesn’t believe Gon.
A dubious silence stretches out between them as they gather the rest of the gear, dropping it in a heap on the sidewalk. “You were kids, though,” Zushi finally says.
Gon shrugs and slams the door shut hard enough to make the vehicle rattle. “I didn’t forget. So I don’t think Killua would, either.”
Zushi’s eyebrows wrinkle on each other, like they can’t decide whether to go up or down and settle on some combination of the two. “What if he did?”
“He didn’t,” Gon says, more sure of that than anything else in his life.
Zushi’s eyebrows dance again, but he doesn’t say anything else.
Between Gon’s camping gear and Zushi’s leftover practice pads, it takes longer than Gon’s excitement can take to get everything settled enough to look for his phone. Well, Gon would have liked to look for his phone, but Zushi makes a pointed look at the shower. There are only so many places the phone could be in the whole apartment, after all.
Gon’s just drying off when Zushi knocks on the door. “I found it, but it’s dead,” he says, voice muffled.
“Then charge it!” Gon shouts. After a moment, he adds, quieter and less snappishly, “Please?”
A faint laugh echoes through the apartment.
By the time Gon can make himself a very early dinner of whatever he could grab out of the cabinets without thinking, the phone is charged enough to turn on. Sure enough, there are a wide variety of messages, mostly from Kite’s groupchat asking about the viral post. A few are from former hikers, people who Gon liked enough to share contact info, offering to see if they can get in touch. There are even a few—okay, how did they get ahold of his old social media page? It’s practically defunct, since Gon’s never had a phone capable of more than the most basic apps. And those are…
It’s flattering in a way, but Gon’s not really into that. Or them.
Zushi catches sight of the grimace, and takes one look over Gon’s shoulder before turning beet red.
By the time he’s gone through and deleted the vast majority of what had been filling up his phone, there’s still no message from Spinner, and nothing at all from Killua. Gon sighs and lies his head down on the table with a heavy thunk.
The other chair scrapes heavily along the tiles as Zushi sits, a mug of coffee in his hands. “What will you do? When he messages you, I mean.”
When, not if, an unexpected certainty coming from Zushi. Gon has the best friends in the world. “Talk to him,” Gon says. “It’s only been fifteen years, right? We promised we’d be friends forever.”
“A lot changes in fifteen years,” Zushi says.
“Not that.”
“Then why didn’t you look for him?”
Gon frowns. It had taken a long, long time, but Aunt Mito managed to track down the cruise captain the last time they were in port, tracing through old charters until the right names came up. But when she’d called them up, she’d been met with stonewall after stonewall, pleasant-sounding voices insisting in no uncertain terms that she would never speak with a member of Killua’s family, let alone let her son speak to his friend. By the time Gon was old enough to look himself, he found nothing but a mansion full of people whose eyes matched Killua’s in everything except for his warmth, who refused to even acknowledge Gon’s presence except to throw him out.
That had been years ago. It’s not that Gon stopped looking. Not exactly.
“I did, but I—” Gon starts to say, but his phone buzzes violently against the table, and they both jump out of their chairs.
“Is it—?” Zushi asks, breath in his throat.
It’s a message from Spinner. you owe me big time, kid, she says, followed by a phone number.
Gon rips his phone off the cable, a wide smile spreading across his face. “It is,” he says, and dials Killua.
—————
bzz bzz—
bzz bzz—
bzz b—
“H-hello?”
“Killua! Hi!”
“…Gon? Is that—It’s really…?”
“Killua, it’s you, I thought I’d never—”
“I did find the biggest seashell, and you know it.”
A breath, sharp and astonished. “The blue and white one, with green lines.”
“I found it, and I gave it to you.”
“I still have it.”
A snort of amusement, slightly damp. “I know. You promised you’d keep it.”
“I did. And I promised—”
“That we’d be friends forever.”
A laugh, delighted and teary at the same time. “I knew you remembered.”
“I did promise you that I would.”
“Yeah?”
“Yeah.”
(AUgust prompts)
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