#today we're gonna do a little something called a birthday

[wrathevil]

elder coded

[adhdtsukasa]

tsukasa tenma has ADHD!! except it's an actual analysis because 1. look at my url 2. i'm mentally unwell (and i started to love tsukasa mostly because i immediately recognized my ADHD traits in him). which is a thing i should probably leave for ADHD awareness month, HOWEVER!! it was my birthday yesterday and i wanted to spoil myself (i just kinda overlooked how much time writing it from scratch would take me, so i'm a bit late with it). and i reaaally don't wanna wait until november when i finally wrote it down because i'm so HYPED because i was preparing for it like what? two years? somewhere around it. and that's a LONG time.

please keep in mind that i'm no psychologist, psychiatrist nor a neurologist and while i do use some sources (cannot really confirm if they are true, though... because i forgot to write credits down... so i'm really sorry for that), most of this analysis was just based off on my personal experiences with the disorder (and i don't really have the full professional knowledge of what i struggle with i'm just a Boy). i mean, i am analyzing a character from a hatsune miku game. i think i'm already putting way too many effort than i should.

also the examples of tsukasa's behavior here are not all of the things, because i wrote down only the things i remember off from the top of my head. sorry, guys. my hyperactive ass is not sitting thru all the stories again just to get my crumbs, unfortunately.

anyways, with this a little bit unprofessional and messy introduction, let's get it started!

1. THE MAIN PART OF THIS WHOLE THING, AKA HOW THE ADHD SYMPTOMS CORRESPOND TO TSUKASA'S BEHAVIOR

i wanted to write it down in my own words, but i think the screen above has summed it up perfectly; there are some established symptoms of ADHD, but to be an ADHDer you don't have to experience them all. and this is going to explain why i'm gonna show a lot of these symptoms later, yet gonna connect only some of them with tsukasa. it's only these i have evidence for, and yet i think they're good enough to point at tsukasa and already say woah! an ADHDer!!

in short, there are three types of ADHD: hyperactive, inattentive (ADD) and combined. the combined one is the most common iirc, so that's also what i'm going to focus on today. especially since for a rep of the other types, i could say that shizuku's a rather great representation of ADD — but that's not the point of my ted talk today, so i'm not going to go into the detail about it. i'm sure some momojan or shizuku oshi would do better than me in this field, so i'm leaving it to the experts.

these are the symptoms that i managed to gather — the first two screens being about the symptoms viewed in children, the last one being about the symptoms viewed in adults. "in which one of them tsukasa belongs to?" that's a good question, because i actually don't know. calling a high schooler a child doesn't sit quite right with me, yet a freshly turned 17/18-years-old is not exactly an adult, either (although most of the symptoms i'm analyzing come from these that are viewed in adults). and while i do think tsukasa has more of the symptoms viewed in adults, we're gonna analyse them all! because i'm putting my all into this.

FORGETFULNESS

i believe there's not much left to say, as this is the most obvious one and everyone already knows that. even though it's not touched that much anymore for some reason, tsukasa's forgetfulness is his very apparent trait. it varies in severity a lot of times: from him basically forgetting both his childhood and true feelings in the main story to him, for example, forgetting his own phone and lunch (in the same day!!) in hinamatsuri. even saki in the same event, while they were arguing, called him a "big, dumb forgetter" and assumed that he forgot what happened the day he brought her the hinamatsuri dolls to hospital. while forgetting basically half of your life is not exactly normal and can be a sign of something bigger, like dissociative amnesia, his forgetting of just the ordinary things and it happening a lot definitely still fits this trait.

EXCESSIVE TALKING/PHYSICAL MOVEMENT

while this is something that you'd rather connect to emu (and for a good reason), it's not like tsukasa is completely devoid of it either; he talks a lot. he moves a lot. it's not on emu's level of hyperactivity, but it's also not "a lot" that's taken as a social norm, based on how the people around him react. he's putting the 1 in oddball 1 2, after all.

in holy night or some side stories connected to it (it might be meiko's side story? but i'm not exactly sure) it was also said that tsukasa moves in his sleep a lot to this point that his parents have to leave his christmas presents under his door instead of next to his bed.

oh, and he also talks to himself a lot. even in class, which was confirmed in chapter 6 of dazzling (or maybe even earlier, it's just the one moment that i remember). (but i'll get to this moment later on)

he says his long monologues, he strikes his poses at every occasion — and while i don't think that's the first thing you think of when you have "excessive talking/movement" in mind, for me it sure does count as it.

LITTLE OR NO SENSE OF DANGER

this point can seem rather weird, because "isn't tsukasa always riddiculed at rui's weird inventions"? well, yeah, he is, that is not a thing to deny. but he also agrees to try out most of them, if not all, if it's for the sake of the show. he's aware of what can happen, but he also doesn't back away if it means that he'll be one step closer to achieving his dream of stardom.

does it count as "little sense of danger"? well, i'm actually not sure, for me it doesn't, but maybe for someone it does. i'd say that's a rather weak point, but i wanted to include the explanation for the counterpoint of it — that's why i even mentioned it in the first place. i don't have a lot to say about this tbh.

update: oh, actually no, wait, i just remembered. remember how tsukasa in phoenix decided to not eat anything for three days just to be able to resonate with rio, while also having to do straining exercise on top of that? you certainly cannot say that's a safe thing to do, but he still went along with that in order to get the role. it makes me come to a conclusion that tsukasa actually has a sense of danger, but sometimes chooses to willingly ignore it if only it makes him get closer to fulfilling his dream. i think it's coming close enough to the little/no sense of danger to be actually considered an ADHD trait.

DIFFICULTY KEEPING QUIET

while i'm not sure if what i'm going to talk about is a difficulty keeping quiet in a traditional sense of way, it definitely counts as it, somehow: tsukasa is loud. like, really loud. and that's another obvious fact both for us and for characters in-universe, especially when thinking of tsukasa shiho's first thought is that he's kinda noisy, which can be seen in the "a friend's brother" 1koma. (and probably a lot of other cases. free shiho.)

tsukasa doesn't seem to realize that he's way louder than he should be and that him being loud is his first impression in most of the cases, though, or at least i don't remember any moment where it happens (and it's a possibility. then that's on me, i guess.). and yeah, i know what's the reason for it, obviously — he's supposed to be a comic relief character. because wansho's stories are mostly supposed to make you smile, as this is what wansho's aspiration is. however, as much as being intended to make the viewer laugh it wouldn't be, it still is a part of tsukasa's character, and a rather important one on top of that. his constant loudness is something that's definitely not considered normal by the society and could very well fit into this symptom.

and since i promised to elaborate on the mentioned before scene from dazzling chapter 6: when tsukasa talks to himself in class, it always ends up to be loud. and it already happened a few times.

(tl by tsukasa's #3 fan on youtube because i don't have proseka on my phone wah)

if it's not a difficulty keeping quiet, then i don't know what is. bro can scream up to 120dB as measured by robonene for god's sake.

IRRITABILITY/QUICK TEMPER

again, this is something that was more apparent with early game tsukasa, maybe he just got medicated. idk man. but even if it happened three, almost four years ago, it still happened, i don't make the rules. back in the early game, tsukasa was really easily losing his temper and getting annoyed, mad even — i mean, that was the whole point of the main story argument: tsukasa's first response to nene accidentally messing up their show, which was not even her fault, was to shout at her. and while this was obviously very important thing to him and being upset at this is a rather understandable reaction, taking this as far as screaming at a poor girl for not being to face the audience because of her anxiety is not something a person who can control their anger would do.

it could be also easily seen by his reaction to emu and rui's antics back in the early game, which were often stained with irritation.

another example is his hinamatsuri argument with saki, where, despite loving her so much, he still got slightly mad at her for not liking the new dolls he bought her. he started to regret his harsh words and actions soon enough, obviously, but it doesn't change the fact that it was rather easy for him to get him across.

INABILITY TO DEAL WITH STRESS

if i'm not mistaken, tsukasa has once said something along the lines of "is it anxiety? there's no way a star like me would feel anxiety" — but i cannot recall for the love of my life in which story it appeared, so i don't want to take it as a face value when i don't have a solid proof for it.

other than this vague mention of "something that's in the story but i don't remember where", i'll admit, i don't really have anything backing me up for this tbf. i mean, i guess maybe tsukasa doing his best to appear strong as a child to not worry his parents could work? because the stress of saki being in the hospital definitely was also present here, although i just see this more as a coping mechanism for his situation than a reaction to stress, so that's not a solid evidence either.

so, yeah. take this one with a grain of salt, actually.

from the symptoms that weren't listed here, i remember reading something about people with ADHD enjoying to show off more, which is certainly what tsukasa does often — and while it actually applies to me too, it wasn't on an english site so i didn't screenshot it and i cannot really find it anywhere in english... so even though i treat it just like my whole argument for the inability to deal with stress, i thought it's just worth mentioning.

however, there is obviously one more thing...

HYPERFIXATION/SPECIAL INTEREST

obviously, i'm talking about acting here: for tsukasa, acting aligns with all these criterias. it is his deep passion; it is something highly engaging for him; it is sometimes all-consuming for him; he tunes out the world around him when he thinks about how can he possibly improve his acting (see: the dazzling moment i showed earlier. yeah, i like to use it as a backing point a lot, as you can see.); and it is something that is his life-long interest.

is it his special interest or his hyperfixation, though? well, it's hard to tell...? because while according to screen two, spinterest revolves around a topic and hyperfixation revolves around an activity, so it would qualify what tsukasa feels towards acting as a hyperfixation, it's still kinda hard for me to call it so because of its length. yes, screen three clearly says that hyperfixation can last years, but they mostly revolve around shorter periods of time, after all (my longest hyperfixation was just a year long, for example). i think it's up to you to determine whether you'd call tsukasa's love for acting a hyperfixation or a special interest, but it's something from these two most certainly.

i'm also a big fan of the headcanon that tsukasa's other spinterest is kaito ww it's in no way a canon evidence (unfortunately!), but kaito's 1* side story, where tsukasa and emu are watching kaito's show and tsukasa is explaining to her why kaito's wearing a scarf somewhat implies that tsukasa knew a thing or two about kaito before the main story. and i'm all for it. colopale let tsukasa be a kaito fanboy pleaseee.

2. I REALLY LIKE ANALYZING SONGS, IF YOU CAN'T TELL

those who have already read a few of my things probably know what i love to do the most — analyzing songs!! so i wouldn't be myself if i just left tsukasa's commisions without analyzing them under the angle of neurodivergence, especially since the sole reason i became obsessed with the thought of ADHD tsukasa was that one sekahaji line (there's too much noise, so much noise and it keeps getting worse you will always be famous).

of course, remember that only the world hasn't even started yet should be taken as a canon value! producers are often given space to do whatever they want in the lyrics of the songs they are commissioned for, so they're not canonical in any way. i think it's still fun to look at their lyrics and ramble about them for a bit, though. i've already got too carried away anyways.

won't be posting photos of the lyrics since i'd hit the images limit, but you can check them yourself — all the translations i'm taking, as always, from the vocaloid lyrics wiki. (since filament fever has two tls on there, i want to clarify that i've only looked at and considered in my analysis the official english one, because it's, well, official.)

THE WORLD HASN'T EVEN STARTED YET

besides the mentioned earlier there's too much noise, so much noise and it keeps getting worse, which i think of as a representation of overstimulation (since i used to see people asking "oh but why tsukasa has something about there being too much noise in a song made out of his feelings when he's such a loud person himself". because he likes the noise he makes, not the overwhelming, overstimulating noise from the outside!!), sekahaji also has a rather good amount of quotes that could be read as something connected to neurodivergence (based on the fact that it's not supposed to be a song about this topic): the main theme of these are procrastination, which can be seen in let's cross the end of all of this, partying forever and the world hasn't even started yet line itself. the thought of the world not even starting implies that there's still a lot of time left to do something, while "partying forever" can refer to deciding to give up on doing the things you should do and going to drown in something that indulges only you and yourself for the rest of eternity. while procrastination is not counted as an official ADHD symptom, it's a trait that people with the disorder very often have (for reasons obvious).

other lines, which i couldn't entirely fit into a box of a certain symptom, are there's too much conflict, so much conflict and it keeps growing (a parallel line to the noise one, so it means something! right) and let's break the plans for a harmonious future. in my personal interpretation, they both can be viewed as your typical neurodivergent struggle in a neurotypical society — "too much conflict" refering to an internal struggle of not being completely normal, while the "harmonious future" that's going to get broken are just the social norms that are going to be broken because of an off-putting, neurodivergent behavior. something that some neurotypical people dooon't really like.

TONDEMO-WONDERZ

since i've just talked about breaking the social norms, "why?!" and "do it like this!!" aren't like you, huh? line from tondemo-wonderz is going to go first, because it revolves around the same topic. it's the same case: it's about (subconscious, not intentional) fighting what's accepted by the society by just being yourself — because you're neurodivergent, you're different.

from the other lines in tondemo-wonderz, i have only one and it's take an eraser to your memories?!, which is pretty much self explanatory. as always, a mention of forgetting something in tsukasa's commision. who would've thought.

88 SHOOTING STARS

another self explanatory line that i have written down as first: it's okay if you only remember a little part of it sometimes. another mention of tsukasa forgor™, and while it corresponds with what happened in dazzling, it's still a line mentioning forgetfulness — so it's worth mentioning.

aren't we just inevitably going around in circles? and it's okay if you take a rest for a little bit sometimes can be interpreted as another mention of procrastination and while it's not that apparent as it was with sekahaji, because going in circles can refer to something else and taking a rest sometimes is not a bad thing at all, i still wanted to mention them here. for the record.

you ought to slip and fall in panic in the final moment is connected to a symptom that i showed, yet didn't elaborate on it (because i didn't have anything to work with) — making careless mistakes. the same case, yet with another symptom goes with is this not enough yet again? is this not how it's supposed to be? couldn't we go even further than this?, which can be seen as a reflection of unability to listen to instructions. a bit of reaching with this one (like this whole part damn), but as i said earlier: for the record, i'm leaving it here. to show that i had some intense thoughts.

tbf, when i think about it now, maybe the mentioned earlier "why?!" and "do it like this!!" aren't like you [...] could very well fit this symptom too.

MR SHOWTIME

mr showtime you will always be famous, because this is a song that gave me a looot of things to work with. i was so flabbergasted when i read these lyrics for the first time. tsukasa tenma why are you like this. /aff

there are a lot of lines hinting being easily distracted, and these are basically the very first ones, too: you know what? i just can't make up my mind, it's so messed up that i can't put my thoughts together and a merry-go-round (my thought process) goes round and round are all about it. like you cannot deny it this time, if it's not about being unable to stay focused then i really don't know what is [insert the tsukasa don't look away stamp here because i love it and it's my biggest motivation to actually focus whenever i do something]. the more i mess around and waste time, the more i become hungry / and i can't handle it can be seen as about procrastination again, and even not "can be seen", it's literally being frustrated at yourself for wasting time, that's the sole outcome of a procrastination!! being bothered by feeling anxious, meanwhile, is resonating with the inability to deal with stress once again.

also jumping the gun. driving in a zigzag manner can actually connected with the little to no sense of danger. because, as far as i'm aware, driving in a zigzag manner is certainly not a safe activity. don't do it at home.

from the symptoms that i haven't yet mentioned to this point, am i taking a long way? am i making a fruitless effort? can be reflecting difficulty organizing tasks — since the poor planning of your activities can make you take a long way and can make you do a fruitless effort. then, where's the fun in taking shortcuts all the time? can be read along the lines of something coming close to extreme impatience and while a person that's extremely impatient would actually enjoy taking the shortcuts to get closer to their goal or destination, said impatience can be also connected with the desire for something interesting to happen. a task can make you impatient not because it's long, but because it's simply boring — avoiding shortcuts can make it less boring, even if it extends its duration. with this explanation, it makes the unexpectedness (unexpected program) is the best part of the show (my life) perfectly fit into this category, even though i wouldn't call this line a sign of impatience on its own.

i have some issues with i'm pathetic. i can't satisfy myself, because... at first i thought of connecting it with either mood swings or inability to deal with stress, however i'm not sure if that's really it. i'm pretty sure it connects to neurodivergence in some way, but i just can't put my finger on it, so... i'm just leaving it here for the record, once again.

oh, and there's also i got lost in the world (stage) and / the end credits rolled (the curtain fell), which also is pretty much summing up the experience of being neurodivergent in the neurotypical society. in the middle of trying to stay true to yourself and having to mask just to be accepted, it's easy to get lost — and once you do so, there's no going back. the curtain falls.

to end this part of the analysis, i'd show the lyrics from filament fever and sekai wo terasu tetrad here. i won't do this, however, and the reason for it is fairly simple — they don't give me much material to work with and i'm not really surprised, because mr showtime has succesfully sucked all of the neurodivergent coded lyrics into itself. there just won't be another song like mr showtime, i fear.

i can just say that in filament fever there is running away from the flow of time — which got me thinking of either procrastination and unability to stick to time-consuming tasks, with the former being more plausible as a potential interpretation... but that would be it.

3. NAKAYAMA IS A METAPHOR FOR NEURODIVERGENT MASKING AND IT'S THE STUPIDEST THING I'VE EVER SAID BUT YOU HAVE TO HEAR ME OUT ON THIS

listen, i know how it sounds.

i'm not actually a fan of trying to fit every thing a character does into a box of a metaphor, symbol or allegory, i really am not. i think some things should just stay as simple as they are, but this thought has been bothering me ever since i've first seen spoilers of what's happening in a story where you're the star for the very first time. i'm in no way saying it has any canonical meaning, but i just thought it would be fun to include. because maaaybe someone sees my vision.

for those who haven't seen tsukasa4 yet or want to have a recap of what has happened in it: the whole event story revolves around tsukasa trying to grasp his role (as always). wxs got recommended to shunmei-za by shousuke and went there to practice their acting skills, immediately getting thrown onto the preparation for their next performance. tsukasa, however, is not a lead this time — he got the role of a supporting character and has got basically three lines to say on stage total. since tsukasa's used to playing lead roles, he obviously has issues with grasping the role — it's hard to use method acting in regards of a character that says three sentences total and nothing more. with help of bakuno reki, one of the actors in shunmei-za, and the rest of wxs, he manages to create a portrayal of nakayama that would make him "come to life" and "be a protagonist of his own story", something that would make it easier for him to get into role, however...

he gets a little bit too carried away with his acting during the actual performance.

and this is not something that would ruin the whole play, obviously, he's just a supporting character, the less invested audience would probably forgot about his impact on the story after five minutes of his last appearance — but he still made a slip-up. he still resonated with his role, but didn't achieve the utmost perfection. he still did well acting, after all, he managed to receive praise from the director in the end... but it's still a very apparent mistake that was made.

(tl, once again, by the awesome tsukasa's #3 fan)

and that's where the nakayama masking metaphor theory (it's not even a theory but it sounds cooler this way) comes in.

nakayama is supposed to be just a man. from what we know about him, he's in his late twenties and works as an editor — and even though tsukasa makes up a whole backstory for him later on, he's still supposed to be ordinary. nothing special. he's coming nowhere near the other roles that tsukasa has played, he's not on the same level as miles, torpe and rio. and while you could possibly consider torpe and rio as rather ordinary, they still had something interesting to happen to them, the main reason why they were lead roles for their respective plays. in the tsukasa4 play, nakayama has nothing like that. he's literally just a guy, he's normal. and "normal" is a keyword here.

tsukasa did everything he could to fit into nakayama's role. he followed the script, he took the advice from a more talented and professional actor that is bakuno, he didn't do any mistakes during his preparations — and yet he still managed to mess up in the end. why?, besides of the fact that he just let himself become one with nakayama during the performance and it resulted in a supporting character outshining the lead?

if we take as a fact that tsukasa is, in fact, neurodivergent, it would make sense that he's having troubles with playing a normal person — because he's not exactly normal either. and this would very well work out as a metaphor of masking; even when you try your best, even when you mask yourself perfectly, you can still make slip-ups. you can still accidentally drop the act in middle of something that absolutely required it, or, similiar to what tsukasa did, can accidentally overdo it and end up perceived as even more weird than you'd be without masking. something something i got lost in the world and the end credits rolled. rings a bell?

and i'm not saying that tsukasa has a problem with masking, because he doesn't. he tries his best to pass as a normal member of society, but he also makes no effort in actively masking his weirdness (or else he wouldn't be a part of oddball one two). however, if you want to neurodivergent code your character, it would make sense to include a possibility of it in some way, right? especially since wxs stories' already had the theme of dealing with being perceived as weird (eg. rui's whole backstory, obviously). even if it's not affecting tsukasa directly, i think it would be cool to include something that indicates this issue's existence in his story and, in a way, his struggles.

however, as i said earlier, this is a very stupid thought and that's why i left it for the very end. i don't actually think that how tsukasa played nakayama was supposed to be a metaphor for masking, it's just a pure coincidence that it could be interpreted like that when you think about it too much.

aaand with this, we've finally come to an end!! (finally. i'm so exhausted.) i don't have anything more to say about this topic. maybe i'll retweet it with some more evidence in the future if we ever get more ADHDkasa content. for now, it would be all!

is tsukasa actually intentionally written as an ADHDer? Who Knows! there's a possibility that he is, but even if he's not, he's still one in my heart. regardless of the status of his possible neurodivergence, analyzing his behavior in this light was still very fun! and maybe i even converted someone into the ADHDkasa hell.

feel free to add something if you want to, and feel free to correct me if i got some things wrong! i still hope that even though of how messy this whole thing is written, i did tsukasa justice and didn't accidentally say too much nonsense lmao

...i hate ending analyses.

[avwfcstan]

Heart Stopper | Leah Williamson

A/N: this was rushed and probs sucks boooo, will probably do a follow up part too (also not proofread lol)

There were many things that gave you a nervous fluttering in your chest; waking up on your birthday, receiving awards, doing interviews and even meeting fans.

But there was also a few things that made that feeling a hundred times more intense. Playing for your country, and whenever Leah looked at you.

It was cliché, but the two of you were completely head over heels for each other. Leah's gaze was the most beautiful thing you ever had the pleasure of catching, but it would always make your heart race a little faster in your chest. Your fiancée often teased you about how nervous you got when you made eye contact especially considering the four years you had been together, but you just couldn't explain it.

Leah looked at you with so much love and affection, a genuine feeling behind her eyes that made you question what you had done to deserve love like hers. Her eyes never failed to make you smile, and appreciate what you had. She was your world, more important than anything in your life; including your career.

You could think of a thousand different examples of times Leah had made you nervous, when you met, when you finally plucked up the courage to ask her out, when you met her family, winning the Euros with her. But nothing would beat how her eyes brimmed with happy tears when you got down on one knee that night in Athens, during a holiday just after England's victory in the summer.

There was a lot of things that made your heart race, beat against your chest as though it was ready to burst, but Leah would always be at the top of your list.

Today was no different, except you had plenty more reasons to be jittery.

Not too long ago, you were called up to represent England at the World Cup and before you knew it, the time was here. Unfortunately, your soon-to-be-wife had sustained an injury to her ACL a few months prior, and it had left her out of the squad indefinitely due to her recovery period. It was tough time for Leah, but you had remained by her side throughout, and she would be forever thankful that you were.

You had played at your best, as well of the rest of the team and it earned you a spot in the semi-finals against France. It was going to be a very tough game, but you had made it this far, and nobody planned on going home early.

No matter how many times you played for your country, it was still scary. Even though you had played well so far, you were so worried it could all go wrong. That feeling in your chest could be a spiteful bastard, and sometimes turn sour at the worst times. It would become a tight feeling, painful and hard to ignore. But in your line of work, it was something that had to be ignored.

"How you feeling, speedy?" A voice had quickly snapped you out of your thoughts. Turning your head to see Millie Bright taking a seat beside you in the changing room that was already full of eager Lionesses prepping for kick off (and listening to ABBA).

You cleared your throat slightly, feeling that familiar twinge in your chest that threatened to turn unpleasant.

"Good." The lie slipped past your lips, not backed up by the fact that your leg was bouncing so quickly against the floor that it could've created a hole.

Millie chuckled beside you before throwing an arm around your shoulder.

"We're gonna kill 'em, save that energy for the pitch kid."

You offered her a quick smile before she patted your back and moved off to have a conversation with Rachel. It was odd, you hadn't quite had this feeling so intense before, but you had figured that the further you got in the competition, the worse it might be. But Millie was right, conserve your energy and let it out when it mattered.

It wouldn't be long before you were due to line up and head out for kick off, and so despite the rules, you pulled out your phone to text Leah. She had managed to convince the physios at Arsenal that she would be fine to fly out for the end of the tournament, promising to cheer you all on from wherever she was sat. She had texted you with the general area, and you told her you'd look for her when you came out.

Putting your phone away, you rose to your feet and followed the team out.

The feeling was ever present in your chest, but it didn't die down. Shaking your head and balling your hands in fists by your sides, it was game time. Win first, worry later.

<><><>

The whistle was blown, and the game kicked off. It was a hard fought battle between both sides. Equal opportunity, but neither could make a real dent in the score line. At the 46th minute, your chest had begun to tighten and your head beginning to hurt, and not in a way you had felt before.

Something was wrong.

An anxiety attack perhaps? Migraine? You had no idea but there was no way in hell you were subbing off this early, not when you were making runs up the wing and crosses into the box that had France's defence all over the place.

One misplaced pass from a French midfielder allowed Lucy to intercept, who passed it promptly to Stanway, sending it you on the left wing where you were already setting up to make the run. Rachel Daly was at the striking position, and after hours of drills, it was about to pay off as an opportunity to score presented itself. By the time the long ball reached your feet, you were off and running it up the line, leaving a stumbling French right back tailing after you. As the end of the pitch appeared, you halted quickly, stopping the ball with you and throwing off the defender for a mere moment.

But that was all you needed.

A sly pass through the legs of said defender allowed you to chip the ball into the rapidly crowding box, but Rachel was there ready to header it in. England, France, the whole stadium held their breath as Daly made contact and sent the shot flying into the top corner. It was though everything was happening in slow motion to you.

Unfortunately, the incredible shot rattled off the woodwork, allowing a defender to clear the ball from the French box, sending both teams back down the pitch.

"France clear the dangerous attempt from England, making safe passes between their back line in order to gain some ground." The commentators were keeping a close eye on this tight-knit game. Their eyes followed every kick of the ball. "-makes a clear pass past Walsh and into the England half, but it appears that Y/L/N has yet to even catch up with her teammates!"

Leah was hyper-focused, prepped for a nasty French counter-attack. With her lower lip between her teeth, she was watching every kick of the ball, hands clenched in hope that the Lioness defence would come through. It was clear that it was neck and neck, and not a single second could be wasted. A French player was closing in on the England box, and Millie was ready to make the tackle, until she noticed a commotion on the pitch.

"France are set on returning the attacking gesture, making good ground- Oh!" The commentator cut himself off. "Is Y/L/N injured? She seems to be stumbling."

The blonde defender's eyes flickered away out the sound of a whistle, the French player halting her attack. Millie's head turned to the sound of the whistle, as did the rest of the players.

There was Rachel, kneeling down beside a body of white kit. Keira stood waving her arms to the side lines, a clear sign of calling for medical aid. The referee had also dropped to her knees, and Leah's heart sank as realisation settled in.

From her position, she was close enough to see that you were lying down on the ground. Still. Unmoving. She didn't see you get tackled, let alone go down. Her throat filled with anxiety, fear. What do I do? Leah couldn't exactly run onto the pitch, but that was her fucking fiancée down there for Christ sake.

"Leah..." Her brother managed out beside her, already knowing. Her brother had come to like you quite a lot, but you were basically part of the family. It was clear the worry was mutual.

The blonde woman heard ringing, her brother's attempts at consoling her falling on deaf ears. She watched as medics ran onto the pitch, and not just team medics, but paramedics. It was clear something was seriously wrong as the ref beckoned them over quickly after her initial examination.

Leah wasn't quite able to process what was going on. Tears pricked in her eyes, and that tight feeling in her own chest had turn into outright panic. Her breathing was staggered, but she was unable to move. She wasn't close enough to hear or see clearly, but she knew.

The English squad all shared a solemn and worrisome look on their faces. Lucy Bronze had her hands on the shoulders of Keira Walsh, seemingly attempting to calm her down. The two of you were close, and seeing you like this was hard. Especially since no-one quite knew what was going on. Lucy pulled Keira away, as the rest of the team quickly stood in a protective circle around yourself and the paramedics, shielding you away from prying eyes in such a vulnerable moment. The French players also joined to fill in the gaps, showing nothing but solidarity for a fellow player.

Your fiancée was only stirred from her panic as her brother grabbed her hand, leading her down from their seats and back inside the stadium. Leah had obviously gained a sort of VIP privilege to watch the match, meaning they had a private area inside before and during the game. As her eyes were torn away from you, her body kicked back into auto drive, ignoring her brother and immediately began searching for someone that could help her.

"Excuse me!" Leah had found what looked like a security guard further down the corridor, just outside the room. "My girlfriend's just been injured and I need to see her!"

The man didn't respond initially, as it seemed he was listening to something being said in his earpiece. "Madam I can't let anyone down there."

Meanwhile, outside the stadium had fallen silent. You were being rushed off the pitch and referee had called a slightly early half-time, sending both teams back to the changing rooms. The Lionesses wasted no time, Sarina was going to have to deliver a game plan at the same time as making sure the rest of the team were okay.

There was a lot of chatter in the changing room.

"Fuck, man!" Lucy stressfully placed her hands on her head. "What the fuck was it?" She asked out loud, hoping for an answer.

"Mate I dunno, she just collapsed." Rachel responded from her seat in her cubby.

Keira just sighed. "It's bad, it's really bad." Emotions threatened to spill over. "She just dropped and she was shaking."

"I heard the paramedics. She was unconscious." Georgia admitted shakily, and the atmosphere in the room changed. But before anyone could say more, Sarina walked in the room alongside some assistant coaching staff.

The girls all shuffled back into their seats, and then Sarina spoke;

"I've been told that Y/N suffered a seizure." The silence in the room was heavy. "We do not know why, but she's on the way to the hospital."

No one knew what to say. Not really.

"Is she going to be okay?" Jess asked what everyone was thinking. The obvious question.

Sarina's gaze dropped.

"I don't know at this time, but it seems that way." Sighs of relief were audible.

Millie then spoke; "Has anyone told Leah?" Heads turned to look at her. "She's here, there's no way she hasn't seen."

"I've sent someone up to grab her, they'll take her to Y/N." The England coach informed her team. "Look ladies, I know you are all gravely concerned about your teammate, and the support and care you showed at their proved it. But Y/N would want you all to go back out there and give it your best."

It was true, the girls all knew how much the game meant to you, and that you were the type of person to never quit. You expected the same thing from everyone else. In truth, it was a part of what made the team so special.

But their hearts also ached for Leah. Watching the person you love have something so horrible happen to them was hard.

So they would go back out there, and win it for you. You and Leah.

<><><>

The match was over. England won 2-1.

Leah couldn't quite bring herself to care, though. For a rare occasion, something in her life had taken precedence over the game.

She was sat alone in a waiting room, in some Australian hospital, waiting to hear anything from you. She had been there for two hours. Before Leah could rip off that security guard's head, an England staff member had grabbed her, telling her everything he knew before helping her get to the hospital. She thanked him profusely, and went inside, trying to find out what was going on with you.

The England captain was told to wait, and that was what she had been doing ever since. Her brother had come in and out, busy making phone calls to his and Leah's mum.

"Leah Y/L/N?" Her head snapped up at that. She had forgotten she had lied about her name, telling them you were married already in fear they wouldn't let her see you. Leah bolted up and headed to the nurse who had called her name, indicating for the woman to follow her.

She pulled out her phone and text her brother that she was going to see you before she was brought outside a door. The nurse opened it and ushered her in, stating she would give some privacy before the nurse came over.

For the first time ever, Leah's gaze on you was one filled with heartache.

Hooked up to wires, pale as anything. Sitting in a bed you had no purpose being in. You didn't look like you.

"Y/N..." The tears that the defender had desperately tried to hold back had breached her eyes once again, flowing freely. You were awake, and the sudden noise had you looking over at your lover.

"Leah." You sighed, seeming a lot more awake than she had been expecting. The girl rushed over and grabbed your hand, before you pulled her into a hug, immediately wrapping your arms around hers. "I'm okay, c'mon, I'm okay."

You attempted to soothe her hurt, ironically. But Leah pulled away, sobbing.

"But you're not! Oh my God, you aren't okay!" Leah hated the word hysterical, she thought it had sexist undertones, but she felt a little hysterical right now.

"Hey! I'm alive! I'm breathing! I'm talking to you right now, aren't I?" You quipped, smiling at her. You still looked pale, slow moving. But still, that was you. "It was a seizure. Stress, they said. They need to do more tests but, I'm all good."

Leah knew you were okay, the evidence was right in front of her. But it didn't make this any less scary.

She didn't even have to say anything, her lip just quivering. You pulled her back into you, mindful of the wires connected to your body. "I know, baby. I'm right here." You ran a soothing hand up and down her back.

"I should be comforting you right now." She mumbled into your neck, making you chuckle.

"Ha, I'm sound." That made her giggle.

"You collapsed." She deadpanned, pulling away slightly again.

"I know."

"You're going to be okay?" She asked, those beautiful eyes finding yours again. "You're going to be okay."

"I know." You repeated, and your fiancée kissed your cheek.

She spent the next minutes asking you how you felt, and you explained how you felt just before you went down and how you remembered nothing whilst you were unconscious.

"I didn't even know I had a fit till I got in the ambulance. I just felt so...tired. Exhausted." Recounting your trip to the hospital, Leah was constantly stroking your hair, looking you in the eyes to make sure you were really there. "But I'm good. I'll be good."

Leah didn't say anything, she just leaned in and kissed you softly on the lips. The two of you shared a sweet embrace until a short beep on your monitor made you both pull away. Leah turned her head and saw your heart rate monitor, and that your BPM had spiked slightly.

Your face went red with realisation, and Leah just bit her lower lip bashfully.

"Do I make you nervous or something?" She teased, and you just sighed at her antics.

"Shut up!" You flopped back into the bed, letting yourself lean against the mattress.

There was a beat of silence.

"I didn't make anything stressful for you, right? I know the last few months have been hard-" You cut Leah's rambling off quickly before she could spiral, knowing what she was like.

"Nope! None of that please. Leah, I've always been shit with dealing with stress. It's my own fault for bottling it up. I'm gonna start seeing someone when we get back, manage my emotions better. Promise." You reassured her, and you meant what you said. You knew Leah had some of the toughest months of her life the past year. Coming off the highs of captaining the team to the Euros win, to being injured and missing out on the biggest tournament in the world was so hard. But you didn't regret helping her through a single minute of that, and no matter how tough it was really, you would never let her take the blame because there was simply none to place on her shoulders.

The two of you were interrupted by a doctor entering the room, apologising for the intrusion.

"Ah, I see your wife found you then, Mrs Y/L/N?" He smiled, walking over to your other side and checking a few machines.

You turned your head sheepishly to Leah.

"Wife, huh?"

She just hummed in response.

"A couple of months, give or take."

[griefabyss69]

Flashpoint

Written for @steddiemicrofic! And dedicated to @swifterthings. Happy birthday Meg!!! <3 <3 <3

[ AO3 ] 'GUARD' wc: 532 | rated: E | cw: Public sex, humiliation

Steve is a sexual thrill seeker, Eddie gets off on humiliation, and they're deeply in love—a tale as old as time!

By now, Eddie thinks he should be used to the risky shit they do whenever Steve gets adventurous. Sure, maybe a handful of strangers have caught them, but nothing bad has happened; usually they just laugh or duck their head and walk faster.

Still, it's like Steve's either gotten too confident or he's looking for a bigger thrill, because today he's got Eddie bent over the hood of his car in the parking lot of the grocery store.

It's nighttime, but cars are still going by on the road and if someone turns into the lot they'll see Eddie lit up on both sides by the headlights of the Beemer.

Eddie's knees are like jello and he can't tell if it's from the humiliation, the fear of getting caught, or the insane shit Steve's doing to him, with his long fingers stroking the inside of his ass. All he can do is flatten his hands against the hood and rest his cheek on it, giving into whatever Steve decides they're doing tonight. He's pretty sure he's drooling on the metal.

His mind is just starting to slip out of hard reality and into something a little more comfortable when a car does pull into the parking lot. Steve buries his fingers as deep as they'll go and stops, leaning over him to cover him with his body.

"Hide your face," he murmurs in his ear.

"Car trouble?" a man's voice calls from where he's pulled up.

"We're okay," Steve calls back, and Eddie gives a thumbs up, hoping the nail polish will help sell their heterosexuality.

"Pretty crazy to be doing that here," the guy laughs. "But have your fun."

"We will, thanks," Steve replies, wiggling his fingers inside of Eddie, forcing a helpless shudder out of him.

The man drives off and Steve pulls back, no longer hiding him, and once again Eddie's exposed to the world. He looks back, seeing the exhilaration in Steve's face, and understands.

Steve wants to humiliate him and save him. He wants to show him off and be his body guard at the same time.

"You fucking loved that," he accuses.

"Yeah," Steve sighs, happy. "You're lucky I covered you."

Eddie images Steve openly fucking him like this in front of the stranger and shivers, feeling his dick jerk where it hangs between his thighs.

"You love me too much to do that," he says, not sure if Steve's gonna take it as a challenge or not.

"That's not it," Steve says, using his free hand to get his jeans undone and pull his dick out. "I love you too much not to share you."

Eddie groans into the puddle of drool he left on the hood. The haze from before starts to overtake him again as Steve pulls his fingers out. He hears a cap, then there's cold lube sliding from his ass crack down to his balls, making him shudder and widen his stance.

When Steve pushes his dick into him it goes easily, but it's still a big hot thing taking its claim, connecting them in a way that never fails to make Eddie's spine melt.

"I love you too," he moans.

[touteslespetiteschosess]

Is It Over Now? || Kylian Mbappé

Plot: Kylian and y/n have been fighting for so long, she's not even sure she knows what they're fighting for anymore. Angst.

Warnings: toxic relationship

Word count: 3458

Masterlist

y/n well done on your goal, amour x will you want dinner when you get home? i'm making myself some pasta so i'll do extra for you x do you know what time you'll be home? i've left some food in the fridge for you x kylian can you reply please? i'm worried it's getting late, where are you?

A deep frown was etched on her face, she stared at her ignored texts, the oldest sent five hours ago and the most recent nearly an hour ago. None of them had received a response and neither had her calls.

She hadn't been able to go to his match today, as she'd already arranged to go out for her friend's birthday in the morning. Kylian hadn't minded though, it wasn't a particularly important match and she rarely missed any of his games, so she could be forgiven for this. Surely that wasn't why he was ignoring her. Well, knowing him at the moment she could easily conclude that there was no reason behind the radio silence. He was just being Kylian.

Dick.

She knew he probably had no reason to ignore her; he was most likely just over at Achraf's and didn't value her emotions enough to dain her with a text back. Still, having been alone in the house for so many hours with only her thoughts to keep her company, she couldn't stop her mind from wandering. It only felt natural to pick up her phone and she really couldn't help herself from opening Instagram. Her thumbs had a mind of their own, opening one of his fan accounts.

Then there he was, grainy footage of him on their story at some club in Paris, surrounded by his teammates. And then there was somebody else. Some girl sat at his side- on his side more really- his arm flopped lazily over the back of the booth behind her.

She was saying something and he was laughing. He was laughing in a way that he never did with y/n anymore. Wow, he was really laughing- surely nothing she said could be that funny.

The video was short, maybe five seconds, but she restarted it, watching it again, feeling a fire raging within her. The next story was a photo that some stranger in the club had taken. The pair were on the dance floor, none of his friends were in sight now. Her hands were up in the air and only now did y/n notice the girl's outfit. She wore a little red dress, just like the one that hung up in y/n and Kylian's shared closet. It was his favourite dress and she knew it.

At the sight, the fire that burned within her suddenly settled, an eery calm setting over her. After a few moments, she headed upstairs and drew a bath, watching the water slowly rise up the tub's sides. She loved that bath; the tub was huge, yet elegant, and sat right in front of a huge window which gave the most amazing view of the Eiffel Tower. Besides that, she and Kylian had spent some memorable nights in this bathtub. Not for a while though, she thought.

Now that she really considered it, she wasn't sure how many good memories she had with Kylian in the last six months. Maybe after three years together, she'd just grown used to the knowledge that she loved him and hadn't considered if he still deserved it. Maybe she hadn't considered if he still deserved her.

Maybe she'd been so caught up in the idea of the perfect man she'd met in that bar three years ago. She still remembered that innocent smile so vividly, the way he'd lift his glass to sip, almost hiding behind the thing. How every time she'd flirt with him, he'd blush like a schoolboy, and then suddenly shoot back with the most outrageous comment.

How a month after they'd started dating, the pandemic hit, and he'd turned up at her door, much to her disapproval. Then, he'd immediately asked her to move in with him. She still remembered his words.

Take a chance. If we're gonna go down, let's go down in flames. I don't wanna forget you, baby.

That aged like room-temperature milk.

He'd convinced her so easily, his charming smile and smooth words always getting the best of her. And he'd been right. Those had been the best few months of her life.

And even after lockdown, when she was back at work and football became more full on, everything had just seemed so right. He just seemed so right.

Every time he'd go away for matches, he'd always find some stupid trinket to bring home for her. The tradition had started the week they'd met, when she'd asked him out on another date and he'd had to turn her down, as he was playing away in Italy. He'd brought her back a little keyring- a pizza with Italia written on it. It was so tacky and so cheesy that she immediately fell in love... with the keyring. Their fridge was still littered with far too many magnets to count, very out of place in his black and white, minimalist kitchen.

Of course, she remembered the first gift, and she remembered the first time he'd forgotten. It was after an away match to Manchester City. An away match that had knocked PSG out of the Champions League- in the semi-finals.

It wasn't that she'd been expecting a gift- no, she completely understood. It was difficult for him; he'd been injured and therefore couldn't play the second leg. He'd had to go all the way to Manchester and didn't even get to kick the ball. He just had to sit on the bench and watch his dream fade before his eyes.

Despite not playing, she knew he blamed himself. He always blamed himself. For the injury. For not scoring in the first leg. For everything.

At the time, she hadn't been upset that he hadn't bought her some shitty magnet for their already cluttered fridge or a bottle opener for their already stuffed drawer. Besides, Manchester didn't have much to offer in the tourism department besides football, so she could forgive him for not wanting to search through shops full of his opponents' memorabilia, just to uphold their tradition.

Looking back on it though, that was the moment he snapped. Three weeks later, he'd returned from Reims empty-handed; when she'd playfully questioned him, asking how she was supposed to sleep at night without an 'I &lt;3 Reims' t-shirt, he'd grunted something about being busy with work and she tried not to let her face fall, wishing he'd have just made some stupid joke in response.

Y/n, I can't afford to keep buying you all these presents.

Honey, nobody hearts Reims.

Well, I had some grapes for you but I got peckish.

But no, he'd just grumbled some excuse and gone up to their room. They'd won the game too. The last match of the season. Sure, they hadn't won the league but that fate had been sealed weeks ago.

Of course, at the time, she hadn't sat up at night, tossing and turning because her relationship was over. She'd understood. For him, she'd understood.

Then, the trinkets began to come every other away match, then once a month, once every few months, and then they stopped coming. The last remnant of their once-sacred tradition still sat on her fridge. He'd brought it back after an unremarkable league tie against Nice. A little magnet in the shape of a palm tree, in the colours of the French flag, with two words on it.

Trés Nice!

What did that even mean? Neither of them were sure. She loved it.

After that, however, the keyrings, and magnets, and bottle openers, and t-shirts, and pens had suddenly stopped. Not trés Nice!

The bath was full, the bubble bath she'd added working a treat. Slowly, she eased herself into the warm water, sighing as she settled back in the tub. She didn't even have her phone but she really didn't care. For what must have been an hour, she stared out the window at the city below her. From his castle, she watched his kingdom, knowing she didn't have a place in it anymore.

She stared at the dark streets they used to haunt, giggling hand in hand as they snook out of their apartment for late-night strolls (though it was always technically morning) down streets that at any other hour would be packed with hundreds of people, pointing at Kylian. Or when they used to go to tourist attractions in the middle of the winter and he'd pull on a balaclava, dragging her up the Eiffel Tower or the Champs Elysees, insisting her liked the thrill. In truth, so did she.

She liked standing hand in hand with him, knowing the crowds around them had no idea Kylian Mbappé was in their midst, and they never would because he was her Kylian. For that moment, at least.

It was late when she heard the door downstairs, the security system blaring loudly. She didn't panic, as it quickly turned off. He didn't say a word on his arrival. She could hear him drawing closer to their bedroom, his feet heavy on the stairs, in the hallway, in their room, approaching the bathroom door.

She thought he'd let his guard down when they first met, telling her his worries and fears, but maybe he only truly knocked down his walls that night in the bathroom months ago, showing his true self.

Maybe she only truly got to know him after Qatar, when he really snapped. When she'd tried to comfort him and he'd yelled at her because she'd never truly understand what he was going through. She'd told him she was sorry. She'd apologised. For what? She still wasn't quite sure.

Maybe she only truly knew Kylian when she'd been struggling at work, doing overtime to catch up on her ridiculous workload at home. She'd missed his match and he'd lost; then, when he returned home and she hadn't been in the mood for kisses and cuddles, he'd been furious. He'd said it was her fault she was stressed- she'd brought it on herself. She could quit her job any day and never worry about money again. She'd tried to explain but he couldn't comprehend her need for self-reliance. If anything, he was insulted that she didn't trust him enough to let him take care of her. He'd never been overly traditional or had an obviously fragile masculinity but that night she'd questioned everything she thought she knew about him.

Of course, he'd apologised the next morning and she'd forgiven him. They were both stressed and there was no reason to let one pressure-fueled spat escalate into more than it needed to. Then those one-off spats became more and more common until they were the norm. If they weren't in silence, they were fighting.

They only found peace when they were fucking. Even that physicality wasn't what it once was, no longer the same slow, gentle love-making. Now it was always quick, desperate, his once soft kisses now left bruises and his whispers of sweet nothings had morphed into wordless grunts and moans.

Is that all this relationship was anymore? Physical.

Light flooded the dimly-lit bathroom, as he swung the door open carelessly. He looked almost taken back at the sight of her, his eyebrows raising a little, as though he hadn't expected to see her here- in her own house.

Then again, maybe it wasn't her house. Sure, she'd lived here for almost as long as they'd been together but it was never really her house. It was Kylian's house in Kylian's city, and she was here too.

He stared at her for a few seconds before smirking, "Hey." he mumbled, already stripping down to join her.

She sunk further down in the tub, allowing the thick layer of bubbles to give her back her modesty. Silently, she watched him, her lips a flat line, her eyes on his face, not his naked body. He wasn't looking back at her. He was too focused on hastily ripping of his trousers and his shirt.

Without hesitation or any more words exchanged, he climbed in the tub and she leant forward as he slipped behind her. She wanted to be held in his arms just one more time, to feel his body against hers. He positioned his legs on either side of her, his arms flopping over her shoulders, as he pulled her back into his chest. Resting his face on her shoulder, he let out a noise, somewhere between a contented hum and a whine.

She ignored him, turning her head to stare out of the window. The city's skyline was dark and at this time, the tower's lights were off. Now, it was just a dark silhouette against a dark horizon, only made visible by the bright light of the full moon.

"What are you sulking about?"

As he spoke, she could smell the alcohol on his breath and she almost wretched at the scent. Her voice was calm and steady, as she asked, "Where have you been?"

Her voice sounded like she had an innocent curiosity in the question as if she didn't already know the answer, or she was merely asking to make small talk.

"Oh, some of the team wanted to go out to celebrate the win."

He didn't lift his head from her shoulder, placing a soft kiss on the damp skin. He lied with such ease. Well, he hadn't entirely lied, just withheld some important elements of the truth. Maybe she'd have preferred it if he'd just lied to her. At least then he would have had to make a conscious effort to deceive her. No, this felt so much worse; he spoke with such ease, as though it was the whole truth, and maybe he too believed it. Maybe he believed that she didn't need to know about the girl in the red dress, just like he'd believed she didn't need a text back, or a kiss goodbye before he left the house this morning, or a goodnight before she fell asleep last night or the night before that or the night before that.

"And who was that girl?" she asked, her voice still chirpy, not a hint of bitterness showing in her tone.

"Huh?" he twisted his head, the side of it on her shoulder, gazing up at her face.

"The girl you were with. She was in a red dress, like the one I have. Blonde hair and-"

"Oh," he cut her off quickly, "she's one of Ousmane's friends, I think."

"You think?"

"Mhm, I don't really know. I didn't speak to her that much."

Now, that wasn't a half-truth, that was simply a lie.

"Oh, okay. Just 'cause you seemed really friendly with her."

He scoffed, lifting his head, his tone suddenly switching, "What, were you stalking me?"

"No, but you didn't reply to my texts and you came home seven hours after the match finished, so I wanted to make sure you weren't dead in some ditch."

"Of course, I wasn't. Can I not have a night out with my friends?"

"Yeah, that's fine but you didn't fucking text me back and the next thing I see you've got some random girl in your lap at the club and you don't even have the courtesy to tell me about it."

"It wasn't like that! Why would I come home and tell my girlfriend that some nobody had been coming onto me in the club?" he snapped.

"Because you were coming onto her too! Don't you think I deserved to be warned that people were going to post pictures of my boyfriend with someone else! It's fucking humiliating!"

She stood up and climbed out of the bath, wanting to get as far away from him as possible. She quickly grabbed her robe from where it hung and wrap it around herself. She sat on the little ottoman in the corner, hugging her arms around herself.

"What are you saying? You know I wouldn't cheat on you!"

He yelled the statement as though it were a fact. Maybe he believed it. He seemed to believe a lot of things. Maybe he just didn't think about her perspective much.

"No, I don't! What reason have you given me to trust you?"

His face fell into an expression of fury, "What are you talking about?"

"I don't know, Kylian!" she almost yelled and almost sighed, somewhere in the middle, "I don't know. What are we even doing this for?"

"You tell me! You're the one picking a fight for no reason!"

"No, not this just... why are we here? We keep fighting and I don't know what for."

He stood up, "What..."

"I'm not happy! You're not happy! What's the point!"

Wrapping a towel around his waist, he rushed over to her, "I'm happy, of course I am!"

"Well, I'm not." she murmured, standing up from the seat and heading for the bathroom door.

"What are you doing, where are you going?" he asked, panic setting over him.

"Away," she muttered, heading to the closet.

"No, you're not." he declared, chasing after her, "Look, baby, I'm sorry, okay?" Ignoring him, she began to change into some joggers and a hoodie. "Y/n, you're not leaving me."

"Why not? All we ever do is fight! There's no point in us being together if we make each other fucking miserable!"

"I told you, you make me happy! You make me happier than anyone else in the world!"

"Why don't you treat me like it then? Why don't you treat me like I'm worth anything? Like I'm a fucking human being!"

He was quiet, watching her as she grabbed a bag and started to toss clothes into it. "Y/n, I love you. I-"

"Do you, though? Really?"

"I do. Look I know I've been busy with work but you know how stressful my job is. I'm trying to be here for you and do my best for the team-"

"No, you're not. I know how hard you work but I have needs too. I can't keep doing this."

She dropped to her knees, zipping up the bag, packed with enough clothes for a few days. He stood in the doorway, blocking her exit as she tried to get her toothbrush from the bathroom.

As she stood in front of him, he took her hands in his, "Please, baby, I'll change. I'll do it for you, I swear."

"It's too late, Ky," she said, shoving past him. He didn't budge, "Kylian, get out of my way."

He clutched her hands as though his life depended on it, placing soft kisses on both of them, "I need you. You can't leave me."

"You should have thought about that before, shouldn't you?"

She shoved him out of the way and grabbed a few things from the bathroom before heading for the front door. He chased after her, his mind racing and his heart pumping a mile a minute in his chest. He swore it was working so hard he could hear his heartbeat in his ears- or was it the sound of her feet on the stairs?

"Y/n," God, her name sounded so right on his lips, he wanted to say her name forevermore, "she meant nothing. I'm sorry, I shouldn't have entertained her like that." Tears were forming in his hazel eyes, he watched her putting on her shoes, "Y/n, you can't leave me, I love you. I- I don't want to live without you. I don't want to be on my own."

"Kylian," she stood up and cupped his cheek. Her hand was so warm and fit so perfectly around his face, as though it was moulded just for it, "you know I'll always love you."

Covering her hand with his own, he shook his head, a single tear rolling down his cheek, "Don't do this to me, amour."

She hated seeing him like this: he barely ever cried. In all of their time together, she'd seen him cry maybe four times and it had never been because of her.

Her soft thumb wiped away the tear, "Don't cry. You'll be okay."

Then she was gone. The door was open and then it was closed. She was there and then she was gone.

He watched the space she'd been stood in for far too long, as though she'd swing the door open at any moment and declare that she'd had a sudden change of heart. But she wouldn't.

She was gone. It was over.

Masterlist

[cloverdaisies]

# UR SUCH AN EMO! ｡𖦹 ⋆｡°✩

— choi chanhee x gn!reader

₊⊹⁀➴ description: the popular kid meets his unconventional match in one of the school’s most hated emo’s. from lab partners to cleaning buddies: the events that caused social royalty to fall in love with someone from the very bottom of the high school food chain. ｡𖦹 ⋆｡°✩

₊⊹⁀➴ genre: angst, fluff, enemies to lovers.

₊⊹⁀➴ word count: 4.1k+

₊⊹⁀➴ a/n: happy belated birthday @sanaxo-o , ily a lot, hope you enjoy this little piece i put together 4 u 🫶 it’s been in the works for a while but i really wanted to complete it for you. ｡𖦹 ⋆｡°✩

₊⊹⁀➴ warnings: mentions of bullying, frequent arguing.

The sound of crashing drums and noisy guitar riffs leaked from your headphones, lazily dragging your shoes across the pavement as you were unwillingly met with the gates of the hell that was school. As usual, the halls were like the inside of a incredibly overpopulated zoo, with heads being met with the sides of lockers and the boisterous roars of students celebrating the beginning of the last semester of senior year.

You couldn’t be more excited to finish school, considering school simply wasn’t the safest place for anyone with alternative taste in anything. You clumsily made your way to your locker, abruptly pausing the music in your headphones before placing them on the shelf and shutting it with a slam.

“Someone’s not happy.” You sighed at the voice beside you, a familiar voice that has haunted your nightmares since you were at least 14 years old. “If you wear anymore eyeliner, you’re gonna start looking like your cosplaying a panda.”

“Good one.” One of other boys perked up, cheering on the other with a pitiful snicker sucking up to him like a little minion in goggles and dungarees ready to steal the moon.

Sunwoo definitely wasn’t the nicest guy to be around in high school, it certainly didn’t help that your locker was conveniently placed next to his so you got the divine pleasure of seeing him everyday. It also didn’t help that his group of minions congregated around that space 24/7 during every break like they had nowhere else to be.

However, he wasn’t the worst of the bunch. If anything it was a boy called Chanhee, he always had something to say, in fact too many things. “Your headphones are making my ears bleed.” , “Try not to wear black challenge!” , or just simple things sometimes like “I HATE your shoes.” You couldn’t deny you brought that upon yourself after one time you’d made fun of the fact he’d worn a beret to school, yeah the entire, “dAd yOu CaNt dO tHiS i WaNna gO tO fAsHioN sChoOl” comment you’d made didn’t sit well with him.

He stood towards the back of the small circle, him, Sunwoo and Changmin were the only ones that had arrived on time surprisingly, as some of that group seemed to only turn up half way through the day when they felt like it. The others weren’t as bad either, Hyunjae was a nice guy and so was Haknyeon, the rest you hadn’t had too much interaction with, thankfully.

Breezing past them with a sigh, you threw your bag over your shoulder and decided it’s best to ignore them rather than make any attempt to clap back. Besides how could you waste anytime when you had the extremely fun class that was chemistry to rush to?

“Okay class, welcome. Take your seats.” Your chemistry teacher welcomed you in with a jovial smile, his combover gelled so stiffly it would survive a hurricane intact. "We're jumping straight into some lab work today, I've assigned you partners based on ability."

The entire class let out a unanimous groan at the thought of set partners, the excited glances made by bestfriends across the room being replaced with long frowns. However, for you, this was simply the best case scenario since you didn’t have any friends in this class. At least that’s what you thought until the teacher spoke some unfathomable words that sent you spiralling as soon as they fell from his tongue.

“Y/n, you’re with Chanhee on this bay.” He called from the second row, you glanced over at Chanhee who rolled his eyes with a groan grabbing his bag and grumpily shoving it down next to his stool.

“Don’t get me wrong, I’m not happy either.” You laughed sarcastically, sitting beside him as he rested his head on the desk in frustration.

The teacher went on to explain the test you’d be carrying out, different chemicals reactivity in water, recording the results and comparing the differences. It was pretty simple, since it’s was just a warm up to ease the class into the semester. Hopefully the time would pass fairly quickly so you wouldn’t have to sit next to mr. miserable for much longer.

“Are you just going to sit there or help?” You sighed, watching the boy sit up with sleepy eyes peaking through the strands of his dyed blonde hair. You passed him a pair of protective goggles, dropping them in front of him as he jolted awake.

“Sorry, I fell asleep you’re that boring.” He replied satirically placing his glasses on. He sported a false smile gleaming off his white teeth, his eyes creasing and smile lines faintly showing at each peak of his lips.

“Charming.” You raised your eyebrows momentarily, filling the plastic basin with water and placing it on the table in front of you. You took turns dropping chemicals into the water watching the the chemicals fizz or even catch light at times. Recording the sound and visual on paper as well as the time taken for it to stop.

“So why do you hate me so much?” You asked the boy curiously, crossing your arms as you watched him scribble down some more notes in his workbook.

“I don’t?” He laughed slightly, shaking his head, his golden earrings dazzling under the light. “I’m more annoyed I have to work with you, because to him, hopefully I can get your grades up.”

“So you’re crying because you think you’re doing charity work? Get over yourself.” You snickered, not breaking eye contact as he stared you down with an intense glare, his pupils darkened in silent rage.

“Maybe you should get over yourself, huh? You ever thought about that, don’t talk to me on your high horse when you had no reason to make fun of me for what I wear in the first place.” Chanhee spat, thankfully the ringing of the school bell paused the argument, diffusing the tension in the air.

The class was dismissed, and in your next few classes you couldn’t stop thinking about what you would have said back to him in that conversation. Perhaps something along the lines of “Isn’t that what you and your group have done to me everyday for the past 5 years?” If the bell hadn’t rang there would have probably been some sort of cat fight break out.

Soon it was lunch, and as you were sitting with your friends on your own table you felt an intense stare across the room. You looked up inquisitively at the feeling of eyes on you, spotting the same group of boys Sunwoo, Chanhee and the others you like to call the minions ( come on they literally have one called Kevin ) staring at you like hawks. You rolled your eyes and continued talking with your friends, eyes occasionally wandering to the other side of the room. You needed another drink, squashing your empty carton of apple juice and throwing it into the trash can nearby —landing a pretty cool trick shot.

“He’s not very happy with you.” A polite voice chimed from in front of you in the line of the canteen, “Said you got in a bit of an argument.”

You turned to see Haknyeon, nibbling on cherry tomatoes from a plastic packet like a small mouse, whilst heartily filling up his lunch tray and sliding it across the surface.

“I can tell that, the minions seem to have a bit of a staring problem.” You chuckled looking over the group where they were trying to land food into each others mouths from large distances, yelling boyishly when Juyeon caught a grape from across the cafeteria.

“He’ll get over it.” Haknyeon shrugged, as he got to the front of the line ready to pay for his food. He held out the plastic packet of tomatoes he was snacking on and offered. “Tomato?”

“No thanks, I hate them.” You laughed slightly, listening to the beep as his card was accepted on the lunch reader.

“More for me then.” He shrugged, stuffing his face with another before flashing the brightest and cutest smile you’d ever seen. You paid for your drink, sitting back at the table with a sigh, glancing back over at Chanhee as he smiled and laughed along with the other boys in glee.

Next period after Lunch was English, the sound of the teacher reciting quotes from The Great Gatsby singing you to sleep like a lullaby. It also didn’t help in front of you, Chanhee and Hyunjae were sat working away taking notes. After the argument you’d had this morning with him, the presence of Chanhee couldn’t put you anymore on edge.

“Hey y/n… y/n? Wake up.” Hyunjae flung a pencil towards your head, abruptly causing you to sit up straight at your desk eyes sensitive to the bright lights around you.

“What?” You rubbed the top if your head where he’d hit and groaned in annoyance. “I was getting a good amount of sleep there.”

“I’m having a party on Friday, you wanna come?” He asked, with bright eyes and a grin of genuine interest spreading across his face.

“You know, I always say no.” You replied with a sarcastic jingle, situating your head back on your desk and yawning tiredly.

“That is not happening. Even if you say yes there is no way I’m letting you come.” Chanhee chimed in with a shocked gasp, laughing to shake off the thought of you being at one of Hyunjae’s events.

“Can’t you just be nice? Y/n’s my friend and actually is pretty damn cool if you get to know-” Hyunjae laughed, thinking the other boy couldn’t be serious but was sharply cut off before he could finish his sentence.

“Are you even my friend?” Chanhee scoffed, immediately going back to his work and not making eye contact with him. Hyunjae shrugged at you, offering a sympathetic smile and going back to his own work.

You didn’t pay anymore attention to the pair of them, your head reintroducing itself back to the table planning to nap the rest of the lesson away.

“Jesus wake up.” You felt a push at your arm, “You can’t interrupt my sleep and then start snoozing behind me.”

You looked up at Chanhee in annoyance, raising an eyebrow whilst observing the disgusted look on his face. You smiled, taking a breath, choosing your words carefully before speaking to the brown eyed boy.

“Will you do us both a favor? And stop speaking to me?” You spoke calmly with a false sweetness loading each word like a bitter bullet, watching as his eyes rolled to the top of their sockets and back.

“That’s enough! Y/n and Chanhee! Both of you out of the classroom.” The teacher demanded, fed up of the disruption from the corner of the classroom. You both got up, more than annoyed leaving the classroom door with a slam.

“You’re so dead for this.” Chanhee glared at you in annoyance his palm resting against his forehead as he tried to destress.

“Deserved. If you kept your mouth shut we wouldn’t be here, would we?” You smiled as he sighed, it was quite funny watching him being kicked out of class for the first time — a place you’d been so many times before, but for him it was more than ego crushing.

“What brings you both out in to the corridors?” The sound of heels clicking down the corridor, has both your heads turning towards the principal with a sigh. “Kicked out of class.”

“Not intentionally.” You groaned, hating having to encounter the woman considering she had her eyes on you 24/7 for sleeping through classes and not doing any homework contributing to your grade.

“Y/n, you can’t be pulling down the reputation of some of our best students like Mr. Choi here. Seeing as the both of you aren’t in lesson, the music store room actually needs cleaning and it would be amazing if you could help.” She smiled, passive aggressively clasping her hands together like a fly.

You’ve got to be kidding me, was the only coherent thought to pass your brain, it was only the first day back and you’d already gotten yourself into so much in just a few hours. She brought you to the storage room, where there was clutter everywhere, cardboard boxes, trash, old instruments just scattered over the unseeable floor.

“It might take a few days, so I’ll make sure you both commit to this for at least an hour each day until it’s clean. No free periods after lunch, got it?” She cocked an eyebrow at the two of you, pulling the dusty chain for the dim light bulb that barely lit the room.

“Yes Ms.” You both replied unenthusiastically, beginning to move boxes to make some walking room amongst all the chaos in the room.

“I could really use a coffee right now.” You groaned as the door slammed shut behind her with a deafening screech, the both of you covering your mouths with your forearms due to all the dust.

“You’ve just slept like a sloth for an hour and you need coffee? Pfft.” Chanhee scoffed, adding on a cough at the end blowing the dust out of his face with a look of disgust painted all over his face. “I can’t believe you got me into this.”

“You got yourself into this because you can’t keep yourself quiet, you’re just always dying to say something negative to me.” You put down the box you were carrying into a pile in the corner, the fragile cardboard wearing thin.

“Only because you for, some reason, think it’s okay to be mean to me too!” He snapped back once again referencing the time you’d made fun of his outfit one day, pulling his red sweater over his palms as he lifted another box.

“I was actually gonna say earlier, don’t you think I hear the same thing everyday from your gang of guys? Do you think that one time I made fun of you outweighs the last 5 years of you making them at me?” You turned around, tears welling in your eyes as you spat your words of frustration out in to the air. A moment of silence lingering, the tension in the air so cuttable and cold it felt like shards of ice hitting your skin, the nerves and adrenaline painting a pink color your in your cheeks.

“Just because they made fun of you, or even just Sunwoo, does not mean for even one minute I thought that about you too.” He softened his voice having seen you get so vulnerable on the topic. “Plus you give Hyunjae a pass, why did you go for me? Why did you make fun of me? I still get slander for the way I dress and act to from them-”

“I could ask you why they get a pass? If they’re so mean to you and you don’t think they should be mean to me, then why are you even friends with them?” You laughed in frustration at the boy justifying years of torment to not only you but himself, it simply made no sense.

“Because I don’t know anything else? Is that what you wanted to hear?” He threw up his arms in frustration watching as your lips sealed in silence. “Or the real answer, because I’m too scared to say I got hurt by it? I don’t want to seem fragile or like I can’t take a joke. I’ve known them since when we were kids, they’re still my friends, my day 1’s. That’s the truth.”

Seemingly emotional, he turned around to the wall slightly frustrated he’d let his guard down, however also perhaps in a state of processing the reality of his own actions and feelings. As if he’d had some sort of emotional awakening, as if the cogs finally started turning on why he was so hurt by what you’d said to him. He was hurt by you, because he’d already had his confidence worn down by the same people affecting you.

The both of you began unboxing the items in the storage room in complete silence, not uttering a single word other than a few coughs or mumbles about how much dust was in the room. You began opening a rather dusty box, a large rectangular one attached to a smaller chunkier box. You opened it and let out a quiet “cool” as you found a brand new electric guitar attached to an unopened amp.

“Do we have a power outlet in here?” You turned to Chanhee with an excited smile, he didn’t look up at you but just pointed to a old looking socket on the wall. You plugged in the amp, attaching the connecting wire to the guitar and played a slightly off key chord due to the guitar being untuned.

“Oh my goodness, that’s so loud stop.” Chanhee laughed slightly, a giggle from pure joy, not a sarcastic or mean one, a genuine chuckle. “We don’t have time for this.”

All of a sudden he returned to seriousness, the laughter pausing as quietly you put down the guitar neatly in the corner of the room and unplugged the amp. Clearly it was impossible to clear the air or bitterness with this guy, you may as well give up trying to reconcile at this point.

“I see how it is.” You sighed, lazily continuing the move the plethora of boxes around the room to try at least uncover the floor of the storage room by the end of hour.

Around 10 or so minutes later the bell rang, signalling the end of the day and soon the hallway outside was filled with muffled laughter trapping you both in the musty room until the storm passed. He didn’t say anything to you, asides from slinging his bag over his shoulder and leaving, it felt as if the conversation earlier seemingly had no effect on his feelings of hatred towards you.

Since it was the end of the day, you went to retrieve your headphones from your locker opening it up to a note that read:

“Ur Such An Emo!”

“Real original, ur so funny!” You uttered, crumpling the paper in your fist and letting out a deep sigh before putting your headphones around your neck.

“Didn’t like my note?” Sunwoo asked leaning against his locker with a cocked brow and his arms folded across his black wash denim jacket.

“Not really. I almost forgot how unfunny you were for a second though.” You sighed closing your locker door, only to have your arm gently grabbed back.

“I’m only joking, you do know that, don’t you?” He asked, his condescending smirk saying much otherwise. Despite it being ‘not that deep’ to him of course it was frustrating being the butt of the joke everyday for you.

“Sunwoo shutup for one minute, will you?” Chanhee approached him, pulling his gentle hand from your arm and turning back away from you coldly.

Almost shocked for words, you stood there for a moment before quickly rushing away from the scene down the hallway. Chanhee? Chanhee Choi? Defending you? Perhaps the conversation did have some impact on the way he thought of Sunwoo and his minion clan.

“So about that party, Friday night.” The cheery voice of Hyunjae beside you forced you to take off your headphones on your way out of the gates. “Are you coming?”

“Maybe.” You sighed, clutching your bag on your shoulder with a delayed and airy chuckle.

“That always means no, doesn’t it?” He laughed in response, trying to make eye contact as you only kept your eyes on the pavement ahead.

“Pretty much.” You shrugged, briefly nodding a goodbye to the boy before parting your ways to walk home. The trees hung over the sunny sky in September, leaves drooping, getting ready to decay orange and make the departure from their branches. Birds flying over the neighborhood in crowds, humming the scene a soundtrack as you stepped through your front door home. Crashing into your bed, you huffed wondering why Chanhee had defended you yet still acted as if he hated your guts.

｡𖦹 ⋆｡°✩ —

Friday soon stumbled upon you, the rest of the week hadn’t been particularly interesting, however Chanhee hadn’t spoken to you since Monday. Everyday the hour at the end of the day that you’d both designated to cleaning the music store room, he remained silent not speaking a word to you everyday, ignoring your questions, jokes and thoughts - only speaking when necessary with the odd “excuse me.” or sometimes even a brief “pass that over.”

Today wasn’t any exception, he strolled in on the last hour without any polite “hello”s or quite frankly any acknowledgment of your presence in the room at all. You’d had enough of trying to entertain yourself with your own thoughts and turned around to the boy with a quick snap. He’d chosen to wear a more toned down outfit than usual that day, straight fitted black jeans with a loose tucked in black t-shirt. In his ears he’d opted for small silver hoops which complimented the thin silver chain around his neck.

“I can’t take it anymore, why’ve you been ignoring me all week?” You huffed out, watching as the boy did nothing but shrug in the most annoying and frustrating fashion. “You don’t know, really? It’s killing me, did I do something to upset you? It can’t be nothing.”

“I’m not sure why I’m ignoring you, I’m actually not.” He sighed, carrying himself within a register that translated words of genuine truth. He finished packing one of the last boxes, placing his palms on the top and beginning to stare into nothing but space.

“Then can you stop?” You laughed walking through to the thin aisle of shelves where you’d been placing organised boxes for the past week. You gently put your last box down, turning and accidentally bumping into Chanhee as you hadn’t noticed he’d moved from his original spot to move his own box.

You caught eye contact with him, forgetting to apologise for bumping into him instead you were lost for words. As you looked into his hazel brown eyes, you couldn’t seem to catch a single coherent thought other than how unreal he looked in the warm lighting above him.

“Can you not? I just nearly dropped my shit.” He rolled his eyes and huffed a huge sigh of frustration forcefully breaking his eye contact with you.

“Jeez I’m sorry, didn’t see you there.” You groaned, returning the eye roll, annoyed he’d began picking arguments with his unpredictable attitude once again.

“If you’re going to apologise try not being rude about it.” He clapped back, you immediately whipped your head back around, slowly walking back up to him and shaking your head in disbelief.

“Shouldn’t you be the one apologising? Didn’t you start the argume-” You began, before you were unexpectedly cut off by him passionately smashing his lips against yours, his hands cupping either side of your face. You couldn’t help but immediately reciprocate the kiss, the shock fading away almost instantly. You pulled away looking at him with a bewildered expression painted across your face, not expecting him to even have that kind of action programmed into his perfect little system.

“Uh, Why? I thought I was ‘such an emo’.” You asked, not being able to contain your laughter as he mirrored your chuckles, a smile plastered on his face as he locked eyes with the ground.

“Well first of all, never tell anyone what I’m about to say or you’re actually dead.” He looked up at you with a pair of sparkly eyes, “I like you? Even though you’re such an emo. I guess.. I have for a while, I always thought your style was really cool and I’m sorry I made fun of you.. I don’t really know why I did it.”

“You’re so awkward quit being so nervous about it.” You laughed as he chewed on his lip trying to hide the nervous grin creeping up. “I guess there’s always second chances, apology accepted.” You teased him, placing a boop on his nose with your finger.

“Thanks.” He spoke softly, his cheeks turning bright pink as you placed a kiss on one side of his face to reassure him. “Uhm, So you coming to that party tonight?”

“Sure I will.” You smiled, grabbing your bag as the last bell of the day sounded. “I guess I like you too, by the way.” You added before quickly escaping through the music storage door, leaving him behind alone, his brain running marathons and his heart beating out of his chest. His phone screen lit up and sending an aggressive bell sound to be muffled thorough the denim of his jean pocket:

y/n: oh and u looked like such an emo today xo

Chanhee laughed, his fingers shaking nervously over his cracked phone screen as he thought of a reply. When he got home he’d continue to text you until the very sunset, when his eyes simply couldn’t stay open any longer. For him, he finally felt accepted for who he was and what he liked — similarly so did you.

[hwaseonghwasworld]

Arranged marriage chapter 5: “Honeymoon”

Summary: being a popular model isn't enough for Y/n’s parents so they decided to get her married with a 6’1”, protective male who is also a mafia, all the secrets and lies everyone kept from her will soon come into the light, what happens once the truth comes out?

Yunho x Reader

Word Count: 850

Genre: series Mafia au!, Smut, Fluff, Angst, Media au!

Warnings: murder, graphic violence, kidnapping, cursing

Updates: Probably Thursday at 7pm BST

I asked Yunho sarcastically, "I thought married couples go somewhere alone for honeymoons," and he responded, "It's just for today doll, our honeymoon is tomorrow." I rolled my eyes at him for calling me doll, but since he's now my husband, I nodded. I didn't want to go on a honeymoon with this man, I barely know him. He helped while we were driving to my house to get my clothes for the honeymoon.

"Your dad told your manager about our honeymoon, so you don’t need to model today" Yunho stated, "but I have to model." "Wait, my dad spoke to Harin, and he didn't call me?" I ask him, perplexed. I glanced at him and realised he was lying about my dad talking to Harin. "Harin. Do you mean the person who witnessed me swap with his wife?” His glance at me confirmed my concerns that it was a lie.

"Ok let me call him right now" Yunho grabbed my arm in which I was holding my phone, our gazes locked, and he snatched my phone and performed something with it, asking, "What are you doing?" "Call me whenever you feel unsafe or if you need anything" "why would I feel unsafe?" I looked at him, still holding my phone, as he said, "It's just to keep you safe." I nodded, and as soon as we arrived at Yunho's house, Yunho's guys placed my things in a room.

"Where are you gonna sleep?" "And where am I going to sleep?" he asked, pointing to this bed. He pointed to the bed and said, "right here" I laughed a little, believing he was joking, but I could see the sincerity in his face "were married doll, we're not gonna sleep in separate rooms"

“Yunho I barely know you” “come on go get your pajamas on” Yunho took his shirt off making me cover my face and turned around “what are you doing!!” “I’m getting changed” “yeah, in front of me” “you’re my wife” he grabbed my shoulders and turned me around he took my hand away from my eyes so I could see him “keep your eyes on me doll” he kissed me and I look at him in complete shock. “WHY DID YOU KISS ME!!” He looks at me smiling “can’t I kiss my wife?” I push him off me and went into the bathroom and got changed.

As soon as I walked back out Yunho was sat on the bed looking at me “Y/n what happened on your birthday” my mood changed “did Hyunjin tell you” he nodded telling me how he just said that I forgot stuff. “Can you tell me what happened?” He beckoned me to come sit with him so I did hut I kept a distance, “when I was 19 I got hit by a car and hit my head on the concrete, they thought I was gonna die since I lost a lot of blood but I just lost my memory and tried to get as much of it back.” I didn’t want to talk about it anymore so I decided to just fall asleep, Yunho sighed and lied down aswell.

The next day we woke up and we were on our way to Japan, it was just gonna be me and him, we went to Osaka and it was beautiful, I knew some Japanese so I was the one who told the register about the booking. We got into the hotel room and i look at the scenery since it’s so pretty.

“Are you ok?” I nodded, walking towards the door and looking back at Yunho “are you coming or no” Yunho walked out with me and we went on a date, we went to a restaurant and I felt uncomfortable because right behind me and Yunho was 3 buff body guards, “what’s up doll, are you ready to order?” “Yunho why are there body guards here!?” “It’s just for protection doll, there’s no need to worry.”

I nodded knowing that he could protect me anyway, I just didn’t want my first date to look like this “Y/n I’m a huge fan can, I get your signature?” The body guards pulled him away “yeah sure” I put my arms out to get the photocard from him we were speaking Japanese so Yunho couldn’t understand what I was saying, I sign the photo card and smiled at the fan as he said thank you “is he your husband?” “Yes” I smile and nodded as Yunho looked jealous and ignored the fan, the fan walked away after thanking me one last time.

“You didn’t have to be so rude to my fan” “I didn’t even do anything” “exactly” I pointed out as he was just ignoring the nice fan. “Be nice next time” Yunho just kept a straight face and looked at the menu “what do you what to get doll?” “Can you even speak Japanese?” Yunho fries and I nodded knowing the answer. “How do you know to speak Japanese?” “Setsuna” “she taught us all Japanese” we ordered our food and we were just talking.

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Arranged Marriage M.list

Main Masterlist

[noxi3xe]

Sepperate post for this

Dangerous Entanglement

Chapters & their synopsis

I decided to lay out all of the chapters in this post to make it more.. clean? If that makes sense

Otherwise my other post’s gonna get too long. I’ll keep updating this one with each new chapter I release. Might do the same for any future works (:

Current chapters:

-Fateful revelations: Introduction and world development, we find out basic information.

-Secret and Allies: we make friends with Hu Tao, who holds our secret and helps us find out more about our soulmates.

-A Perilous Celebration: Our 22nd birthday! It’s all going well and smooth till we notice a little something in the distance.

-Hilltop Hazard: What’s a celebration without sneaking into a fatui camp and almost getting caught?

-Caught and Almost Cornered: But of course how can you end a birthday party without getting chased?

-A Fateful Encounter: The bank’s always busy, you never know who you’ll meet there. Could be one of your soulmates.

-Mountain Mysteries and New Friends: A little scare in the mail to start out your day strong, but new friends fix all worries.

-Heartfelt Goodbyes: saying goodbye to our new friends to head back to the city and continue our *boring* life (which is about to get interesting)

-Ball Gown Secrets: What’s better than waking up to your best friend arguing with your father, winning the argument then taking you shopping? Nothing!

-Voyage to Snezhnaya: The trip to Snezhnaya finally arrives! I wonder whatever we might talk about on the trip, hopefully not something that’ll change our entire life!

-City Sights and Palace Nights: We had arrived to Snezhnaya! Time to look around and get used to the place, the sights are lovely and the people even lovelier.

-Draped in Pearls: Finally the night we’ve been awaiting, and how else could it start off other than with a staring match?

-Snatched by the 9th: Perhaps coming to Snezhnaya wasn't such a good Idea after all. If only we could clear our mind witnout a certain somebody chasing us down..

-First Official Meeting: Face to face finally with those we're supposed to spend our life with, at least that's what the universe has planned for us. They don't seem that bad after all, perhaps we were over exaggerating

-Enforcing Rules: It's time to sit down for a talk and end the evening with what else than being forced into a bath, there's nothing better!

-Getting Comfortable: A chill day, nothing on our mind other than laying back a little.

-Office Works: Well running errands for Pantalone sure did not end as one would expect, thankfully nothing worse than a bit of bullying happened, right?

-Errand Runs: Gone Wrong: Yesterday was confusing and exhausting, but today was something different. Why was luck not on our side and why did it seem as if the whole region had something against us? TW: Minor Violence and Angst (A little bit of it, at least).

-Laboratory shenanigans: We've had enough of everybody, enough of getting pushed around and perhaps we took it out on the right person!

-Promotions and Experimentation: First official day at the lab, I wonder what The Doctor has planned as our first experiment! TW: NSFW

-Stormy nights: Passing out randomly lead to waking up hours later and that lead to bonding.. if you could call it bonding even, more like eventual bickering!

-'First' official day off: Looks like a certain somebody has fallen sick! And what's a better way to rest and take the day slow than to read a book and cuddle under the blankets? TW: Gore and horror aspects (We Read a book)

-Promises: It sure is sweet when a story ends happily, isn't it? That's what we had always thought but never really knew we would once experience our happy ending as well. TW: NSFW

+ bonus chapter [sheep] There's a lil secret I gotta tell you that I definitely haven't told anybody (Author's note and a thank you)

__________

DottoreEnjoyer69 on AO3

Link to the fic here

[sandcobangevent]

we're gonna party like it's your birthday!

by @alistair-theirins-tits and @lxvenderjewel

John wakes up on May 21st like any other normal day and pulls himself out of bed, groaning as his bones creak while he stretches his arms high and sighs.

He brushes his teeth, humming to himself, swishes mouthwash in his mouth and spits it out. He looks in the mirror, running a hand through his hair so it doesn’t look too awful.

He enters the kitchen for a morning coffee to see Mariana and Sherlock already up and awake, mugs in their hands, Mariana hissing in Sherlock’s ear. They both stand stick straight when John walks in.

“Morning,” he says, walking directly to the coffee machine, still half asleep. “Anything interesting? Any cases lined up, Mari?”

They both look at him a little bewilderedly, which throws him off. “What? Is something in my teeth? Christ’s sake, I just brushed my teeth…”

“N-No, nothing’s wrong, sorry,” Mariana stammers. “Don’t worry about us. Nope, no cases today, we’re pretty much free.”

“Neat,” John says, watching the coffee pour into the mug before dousing it in creamer. Sherlock makes a noise of disgust, and John grins.

“How can you stand to drink it like that? ” Sherlock asks, lip curled, and Mariana kicks him in the shin.

“Be nice!” she hisses. Sherlock sighs.

John’s thrown again. When has Mariana ever cared about Sherlock teasing him? Usually she just… laughs it off?

John sips his coffee and looks at the two of them, waiting for one to initiate a conversation. Mariana and Sherlock exchange glances, glances that he cannot at all parse out.

“Are you both okay?”

“Can you go get groceries?”

John and Mariana speak at the same time, and John snorts.

“Is that what you two were so worried about? Yeah, I’ll go get them,” he says.

“Yeah, yep, definitely that, we’re just so nervous today, John,” says Mariana.

“Nervous? What for?” he asks.

“Erm. Nothing. Just, er, jumpy.” Sherlock says, and Mariana’s face goes right into her hands.

It’s weird. Usually John is able to get a read on whatever’s bothering the other two, but today he just can’t make it out. Is today special to one of them, or what? What is he missing here?

He resolves to investigate this more when he gets home. Maybe Sherlock and Mariana have just had a fight, or something, and they need to walk it off. Yeah, that’ll do for now.

He goes downstairs, pulling on a jacket. He looks down at himself– graphic tee and sweatpants. Yeah, that’s fine.

He looks next to him for a moment, and the unused coat closet is open, for some reason. If he peeks in, he can see– is that a banner of some sort? And tinsel? And–

“Watson, are you out yet?” Sherlock calls from upstairs.

“Oh, you want me out that bad?” John teases.

“ Yes,” Sherlock yells.

“ Sherlock!” Mariana yells at him, and John hears a shout of pain. He snorts to himself, and then pushes himself out the door. Unfortunately there are things to do today.

The walk to the grocery store is about 10 minutes, so fairly close. It’s a nice day out– not too wet, like it tends to be in May, not too hot either. John lets himself linger while he walks, treats himself to London at its best.

It’s when he gets to the grocery store that he realizes Mariana never gave him a grocery list. Bollocks.

He gets his phone out and shoots a text to the group chat Mariana made ages ago, that’s become their primary mode of communication at this point.

the 221three

Hey what do you want me to get Mariana

Boss Lady: oh shit let me check the fridge

Master Detective: Can you get pasta? I think we’re out of pasta.

I’m fairly sure we’re not out of pasta actually

Master Detective: I couldn’t find any pasta in the pantry, though?

Boss Lady: that’s because we put it in the cabinet

Master Detective: Ah.

Boss Lady: right john can you get eggs milk honey jam bread and pesto sauce

Boss Lady: and dill pickle chips

Dill pickle chips??? What?????

Boss Lady: it’s like upgraded salt and vinegar chips

Master Detective: Wait. Ms Hudson.

Master Detective: I don’t like pesto.

Boss Lady: yes well i do so john get me pesto sauce

Master Detective: I hope you’re not planning on using my penne for that.

Boss Lady: ugghhhhh john get elbow pasta at the store

Yes ma’am 🫡

Boss Lady: what is that i just see a box

Right I forgot you were an android user. Loser

Boss Lady: bullying this is bullying

Grinning to himself, John puts his phone in his pocket and grabs a shopping basket.

Groceries usually don’t take very long— until the pesto, that is, because he’s looked all over the pasta aisle for them and he still can’t find any. 

He sighs, taking a last glance at the aisle, ready to give up and face Mariana’s wrath when he gets home when he sees a familiar face passing by his aisle.

“Oi, Stammo!” he calls, grinning.

Stammo slowly walks backwards, holding a cake in his arms. A big one, at that.

“Hey, John,” he says, his face doing a gymnastic routine of emotions before settling on being nervous but pleased.

“How are you? How’s Nadia?” John asks.

“I’m well, she’s great, yeah,” Stammo says, smiling at the floor. John would punch him in the shoulder but well. He’s holding a giant cake. Best not to do that.

“What’s the cake for?” he asks.

“Er– Nadia had a craving–?” Stammo says, hesitantly. “Yeah– she had a craving for cake.”

“That looks more like it’s for a party, though, doesn’t it?” John says, raising his eyebrows. “She wants a cake that big?”

“Hey, who am I to judge,” Stammo shrugs. John nods sagely. “Anyway, I’ve got to go– she’s going to kill me if I stay any longer.”

“Tell her I say hello!” John calls as Stammo scurries away. He sighs, smiling. Stammo’s always so fun to talk to, even if he seemed a bit in a rush today. He looks up and–

Ah. There’s the bloody pesto.

The rest of the trip isn’t noteworthy, really– the rest of the groceries are easy to find and he has a bit of a row with the self checkout machine but that’s generally what happens when he goes shopping by himself– and he gets back home to 221B in 20 minutes.

He knocks on the door, but no one answers. He rings the doorbell, but no one answers. 

Odd. 

He checks the doorknob and for some reason it’s been left unlocked. He has the distinct memory of locking the door. 

He pushes in anyway, ready to smash the bottle of pesto over someone’s head if he has to. The lights are all off downstairs and slowly, he makes his way to the steps, grabbing onto the handrail and looking around as if he can see anything in the first place. 

“Sherlock? Mariana?” he calls into the darkness. “Where are you two?”

Silence. Utter silence.

He opens the door to 221B, fearing the worst. The lights are still off.

He turns them on. Distantly he muses that he ought to have turned the lights on downstairs first, but he’s already up here, isn’t he? He survived.

The lights turn on with a slight flicker. He shuts his eyes and prepares himself, then he opens them again, and–

“HAPPY BIRTHDAY, JOHN!” a bunch of voices yell. Sherlock and Mariana are in front of a large banner with the same words written on them, and the cake from the store is on the coffee table lying ready to eat.

In the kitchen are Stammo and Nadia, presumably having just finished cooking something, and Archie races up to him, licking his feet.

“Wha…?” John says. “Wh– What’s going on??”

Everyone’s faces freeze.

“It’s… your birthday, John,” Sherlock says, slowly. “This is a birthday party.”

“It’s my– what? I thought that was tomorrow,” John says. “It’s the 21st.”

“It most certainly is not.” says Sherlock, incredulous. “It’s the 22nd.”

“Erm? What? Let me check–” John struggles his phone out of his pocket. He literally opened his phone today, he cannot have missed the actual bloody fucking date–

But, to his abject horror, he did.

He couldn’t believe his eyes. He missed it. He forgot.

“Er– oh my god–” he huffs a laugh. “I– is this why you two were looking at me like I was completely insane this morning?”

“Well, I wouldn’t describe it as that–”

“Yes.”

Mariana kicks Sherlock in the shin again, and he lets out a low groan of pain.

“You don’t need to kick him,” John says, smothering giggles behind his hand.

“He’s being rude! It’s your birthday!” she pouts.

“Can’t believe you forgot your own birthday, Watson,” Sherlock scoffs.

“Well– I– I’ve been busy! Lately! I stayed up until like two last night editing!” he says, defensive.

“Goodness. Take a break,”

“You’re one to be talking,” John snipes.

“Excuse me?!”

“Anyways, Mariana, thank you,” he says, steamrolling forward, “This is so nice, I can’t imagine how much planning it must’ve taken.”

“Oh– me? Don’t thank me,” she stammers, crossing her arms.

“Why not?” John asks.

“Well, Sherlock did most of the planning, I just sent invitations,” she says.

“ Sherlock?” John says, eyes widening.

Sherlock is looking at the floor, trying to hide behind his curls.

“Was nothing, really,” he mumbles.

“Oh, Sherlock–” John steps over Archie and strides to the coffee table, wrapping Sherlock in a tight hug. “This is so nice. Thank you.”

“Really, it was nothing,” he repeats, cheeks darkened. “Happy birthday, John.”

They stand like that for a moment, John’s face buried in Sherlock’s shoulder. God, to think he forgot– and Sherlock remembered– and planned a party?

He shall not get teary at this here birthday party, no matter how much of a fight it takes. 

“This moment is nice and all, but I’m really hungry, so can we please light the candles?” Nadia calls from the kitchen.

There is laughter, and then there is cake.

______________

Check it out on AO3 too!

[satanic-beast]

         𝐑.𝐈.𝐏. 𝟐𝐎’𝐬, 𝐇𝐄𝐋𝐋𝐎 𝟑𝟎’𝐬 !

Valentina Gabriela Halliwell. Three names behind which stands an incredibly stunning and strong woman. Where do I start with something that never ends?

Over the course of your life, you have shaped the lives of so many people and in everything that has connected you to them and sometimes broken you inside, there has always been one thing: Your iron will to live and make Prudence proud. There are so many things I admire you for; you know damn well you have also had a lasting impact on my life. Through you I was able to and continue to get to know myself more deeply, through you I experienced the struggles and changes a person can experience and yet none of it has permanently brought you to your knees. I see you in front of me as if it were yesterday: The young, slightly shy, but also playful woman who didn't know the road that would lead her home eventually and tried to see it in every curb in New York instead. We both share an incredible bond, a bond I couldn't be prouder of; just as I am proud of you. You fought, cried and overcame your darkest hours to become the woman you are today and that's entirely your doing, you hear me? It shows your inner strength, the strength of the love into which you were born and which will never leave you, no matter how dark, cold and unfair this life can be.

And yes, some things may feel like the end of something big right now, but Valentina? I'm gonna be honest with you, 'cause in a way it is. This means saying goodbye to the woman who has done her best and is ready to move forward. This means saying goodbye to the woman who thought she couldn't find her way, who thought she wasn't enough - because here and now you know better. Every ending also offers a new beginning. This is your new beginning. This also means a big hello to a woman in the middle of her life, to a mother of two children who could not have been born into arms more protective than yours. Sometimes it's hard to find good things in life because we're too busy focusing on everything that doesn't work out as we want it to. Take this special day of yours as an opportunity to see what enriches your life and above all: What YOU have created. From memories to precious friendships that are like family, from your own bookstore to the beautiful family we can call our own. You have achieved SO much and I don't have to be an oracle to know: It's far from everything.

You are fierce, full of power, full of dignity and strength, so full of potential and wild, unbridled love. If you could see yourself from my eyes for just a moment, the happiness I feel through you would exist in the tears in your eyes. You deserve far more than what life has offered you up to this point, so much more, and I will always stand by your side to strengthen you through it. I am convinced that there are still many lessons, setbacks and successes waiting for you, and most of all that you will live a happy ever after. Although I may not be able to give you what you wish for most right now, I can still give you something that will last: My unconditional support, the boundless love of our family and my protection. I will catch you whenever you are about to fall, don't you worry.

When I asked our children what they wanted most for you, they said: " We wish for Mommy to be happy. Because she makes us happy! " Our little ones could not love you more than they already do; they look up to you, emulate you, yes, I know that Eisa wants to be like you one day and that Bael will look for exactly the same strength of will and a good heart in a woman as he witnesses it in his Mom day by day.

We have prepared some surprises for you and we can't wait to celebrate your big day with you, Valentina. Happy Birthday from one scorpion to another — here’s to many more valuable years with you, snowflake. @themeanhalliwell

[eris-snow]

𝐇𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐈𝐭 𝐀𝐥𝐥

Tags: Proposal, gn!reader x bakugou, fluff

Have It All is a really good song that is all at the back of our minds but close to the garbage can of "I don't need to remember this." Makes a great proposal song if you ask me.

Something's wrong with Bakugou.

For one, he ditches his only free day in the month to disappear into thin air. He's gone for 5 hours straight, without a single text or call to notify you as if he was a literal ghost.

Next, after goodness knows how long, he simply forwards a simple image to you. Three words hover right beneath his message. "Meet me now."

An order.

A demand.

You blow out your breath in disbelief. "What the hell is wrong with this guy?" You huffed, shooting up from where you laid down on the couch.

The photo is one of your usual getaway: The sandy beach nearby his parents' house. It was where the both of you would go whenever things got too rough, a practice ever since high school started for the both of you.

You and Bakugou would splay a picnic blanket on the ground, eating fast food while star-gazing as you both fill each other in on the latest happenings that occurred.

Sometimes, you would walk along the shores of the beach, kicking water at Bakugou just to see how he reacts. When you first started dating, he'd hiss at you like a cat, yelling at you as he placed your head in a headlock.

Now, Bakugou simply smirks, cocking a cheeky eyebrow. "You asked for it." He grins.

Maybe it wasn't really romantic when he would chase you around for minutes, scream phrases like "COME HERE YOU LITTLE SHIT." with a completely straight face. But that was just how you and Bakugou were.

He was never like that to begin with.

As the wind combs through your untidy hair, you swiftly take a glance around the sparkling beach that holds so many memories to you. The sand weaves its way in between your toes the minute you step foot on the beach as you glance around in search of your partner.

"I swear to God Katsuki, the second I find you I'll-"

The minute your voice starts to rise, you hear the faint sound of a music track playing from across the beach. 

It was where It’s only then that you see your boyfriend, dressed in a full black suit standing in the distance where the track is playing.

“May you have auspiciousness and causes of success, may you have the confidence to always do your best…” Lyrics of a song you knew so well started to be sung beautifully. 

Yep. Your boyfriend had definitely gone insane.

Weary but curious, you wandered closer, his frame growing larger and larger until you could hear the music’s instrumentals blaring loudly in the background. “K-Katsuki…?” He grinned at you, microphone held up to his lips as his red eyes locked with yours. “And may the best of your todays be the worst of your tomorrows,” You laugh, hands held up to your face, touched. Bakugou never did anything this corny for anyone. Not even you.

Yet here he was, singing one of your favourite songs whilst standing in a full dressed tux on a beach.

“And may the road less paved be the road that you follow," Oh, god, if this were a dream, don't let anyone wake you up. Bakugou's voice is raspy and perfect, hitting every note with ease as he tips the microphone to his lips.

"Well here's to the hearts that you're gonna break,

Here's to the lives that you're gonna change

Here's to the infinite possible ways to love you

I want you to have it

Here's to the good times we're gonna have

You don't need money, you got a free pass

Here's to the fact that I'll be sad without you."

Bakugou pulls you closer, smirk never leaving his face as he utters a final sentence. "I want you to have it all."

"Katsuki..." You chuckle, shaking your head in disbelief as he drops the microphone down on the sand. "What's all this...?"

Had you missed something? An anniversary, his birthday, a special occasion? There's no other reason for him to be doing such a thing. "Y/n," He finally speaks, and you wonder how he still looks so beautiful in the sunlight, dusk drawing near.

"You are the best, most amazing person on this god damn planet." You laugh, shaking your head in disbelief as he grabs your arms. "Don't you shake your head, believe me. You're the best thing to ever happen to me and don't you fucking deny it."

He steadies his breath as the wind howls around you. "I want you by my side forever." Bakugou's voice is a whisper now as he drops down on one knee. Your breath hitches, mouth agape in awe because there's no way the Katsuki Bakugou-

"Y/n," He breathes, and tears flood your eyes because he just continues on. "I love all of you, with all of my fucking soul."

There's not an ounce of doubt in his voice, his eyes shining with hope and adoration and love as he looks up at you. "Will you marry me?"

You savour this feeling eyes brimming with pearls of water as the ocean roars beside you. He's waiting, the entire world's waiting, but time seems like a fickle thing as you gaze at the man that had captured your heart.

"Yes!" You shout, breathless, wiping your tears away.

"Of course, Katsuki, yes!"

He grins and shoots to his feet, racing to hug you and twirl you around in a circle. "I knew you'd say that,"

The both of you kiss, sweet and perfect. "You're my everything, Dumbass," Bakugou lips when you part.

"You deserve to have it all."

[babyhatesreality]

hi friend!! i love ur work so muuuuch, you have no idea!! i literally check everyday if you post something 😭 i think i'm obsessed with you atp 😭 but it's my birthday today! and i was wondering what baby or the daddies are like during baby's birthday and how they celebrate!! 🎂 it's probably so cute and chaotic and baby doesn't shut up about it for days or maybe daddies get too excited and go waaaay overboard with the planning and decors bc they want the best for baby 🥺 ilysm and i hope you know you truly make my day 🤍

Hi back Nonnie Friend!! Happiest of birthdays, my darling!! Thank you so much for your kind words, they helped me immensely today, they were such a gift. Okay, I'm breaking my own rule here and skipping up in the line as I wanted to get this out on your birthday to give you a gift right back! (To all my other asks, please know you are ALL literally WIPs right now!!) Happy Birthday, Nonnie!!! <3 <3 <3

The Birthday Baby

Pairing: Daddy!Stucky x little f!birthday baby

Warnings: DDLG (SSC), f! reader, reader's birthday, daddies going nuts (in the best way possible), super hyper excited baby, fluffity fluff fluff fluff.

YOU ARE RESPONSIBLE FOR YOUR OWN MEDIA CONSUMPTION. THIS STORY IS SFW- THE REST OF MY BLOG IS NOT NECESSARILY SO. MINORS DNI. I DO NOT CONSENT FOR MY WORK TO BE STOLEN, COPIED, OR TRANSLATED ONTO ANY OTHER SITE BUT MY OWN. Likes, comments and reblogs are deeply appreciated. 

"I'm telling you, it's dinosaurs."

"Dinosaurs was LAST week. THIS week it's My Little Pony."

"Okay, yeah, I'll give you My Little Pony this week, but she likes the Disney princesses better than the Ponies."

"Anyone can do Disney princesses at any time, we need to go with what she likes right now. And I'm telling you, it's My Little Pony."

"That's just a phase."

"Well, so were the dinosaurs!"

"She plays with them in the tub constantly, she's always stomping around the place roaring..."

"Oh, is that what she's doing when she does that? I thought that was Lion King."

"Wait...it might be dragons then..."

"No, she wears the dragon wings and the mask when she's a dragon. So I guess you're right. Wait- none of the My Little Ponies roar, do they?"

Bucky flopped back down on their bed with a groan. He couldn't keep up any more. He and Steve had been at it for what felt like hours, trying to figure out the theme for your upcoming birthday party. The trouble was, you bounced so quickly from favorite thing to favorite thing, they couldn't figure out what would make you happiest. They had tried asking you. It had gone about as well as the conversation was currently going. No one was able to make up their minds about anything.

"Buck, it's gotta be perfect," Steve said, running his hands up and down his thighs nervously. It was the only thing keeping him from bolting off the edge of the bed where he was sitting and pacing around the room. "It's the first time she's spending her birthday with us- we need it to be special and exactly what she wants."

Bucky sat up, chewing on his bottom lip as he thought. "Okay, Stevie, maybe we're going at this the wrong way. This may be nuts, but go with me. What if...."

And then he laid out a weird but potentially brilliant solution. And they both breathed a sigh of relief. Then got to work.

***********************************************************

The day before your birthday arrived, and you were running around like crazy, so excited for your party the next day. Papa and Daddy would only tell you that you were going to like everything at the party- they wouldn't give you any more details than that. Which drove you batty in the best way. You were constantly running from room to room, looking for clues, asking them questions, and spinning in circles in pure excitement.

"All my friends gonna be there, right?" you asked Steve for the umpteenth time. He smiled patiently and nodded.

"Everyone's coming, sweetness."

"Even Nicky?"

"Yes, even Director Fury," Bucky jumped in. "And I wouldn't call him Nicky, baby."

"It's my BIRFDAY, Daddy, I get to make da rules!" you said impishly, giggling at the idea of calling the tall, cool guy 'Nicky'. Bucky gave you a devilish smile back before scooping you up and tickling you.

"Yeah, that's not how that works at all," he teased while you screamed with laughter. Finally, when you seemed to wear out slightly, he set you down with a gentle pat on the butt. "Now go play. Papa and I have work to do."

"For my birfday??"

"Can't tell you, it's a surprise," Papa grinned at you. You just squealed in delight, knowing that was code for 'yes', and tore out of the room, cheering.

Steve sighed happily. "Well, she's gonna sleep well tonight," he joked as he listened to you running down the hallway to the playroom. His phone pinged. He pulled it out, then gave a short cheer at the message. "Last thing just arrived," he said triumphantly. "Sam's hauling it to the rec room, and he's going to help us set up after she's gone to bed."

Bucky rubbed his hands together gleefully. "We did it, Stevie, we got it all. Nothing more to get, it's all here. We did it." They both paused in their cheering when they heard your footsteps come pitter-pattering down the hallway again. You peeked in to see if they were still in there, and then gleefully jumped into the room, holding out a piece of paper.

"Lookit, Papa, lookit Daddy!" you said, holding up your artwork. "Lookit what the new crayons that Aunt Shuri sent me do!! The purples are SPARKLY!!" you squealed with joy, shaking the hastily drawn flower picture at them. "They SPARKLE!! Purple sparklies are my new favorite EVER!! I'm gonna go draw more flowers!" you shrieked in one excited breath before hopping out of the room like a bunny.

Steve and Bucky just looked at each other in panic. Steve recovered first, going back to his phone. It only took two minutes, then he sighed in relief again.

"Okay," he said, a touch of weariness in his tone. "Purple sparklies on the way."

Bucky shook his head in wonder. "Wow," he said, hushed, looking at the phone in Steve's hand. "This internet thing...so great," he mused. "I still can't believe it."

"SO helpful, right??" Steve said, nodding vigorously along with his husband's wonder and appreciation of modern technology.

**********************************************************

The next day was one that you would remember forever.

You had excitedly but nervously held onto both your daddies' hands as they took you down to the big Avengers room where you all had your inside parties and holidays and stuff. They were watching you with big (and nervous) smiles on their faces as you entered the room, just the three of you. You stopped in awe at the sight that awaited you.

The room looked like it FAO Schwartz had exploded. There was a little bit of absolutely everything you loved, tucked into every nook and cranny of the room. There was a pin-the-tail-on-the-My-Little-Pony game, an inflatable dragon perfect for someone to bounce on, a dinosaur pinata, a coloring station, a lego station, a Disney princess dress-up costume rack- the list went on and on. Along with pops of colorful streamers and bunches of balloons with lights in them. It was a joyous cacophony of color and imagination. You walked around slowly and softly, your eyes wider than they'd ever seen them before, touching everything reverently as you took it all in. After a lap around the room and seeing a bit of everything that you loved, you turned to them.

"IT'S PERFECT!!!" you screamed joyously, before hurtling yourself into their arms.

The rest of the day was a brilliant blur.

Sam was the first one to arrive, and scooped you up in the biggest hug possible, whispering in your ear that you two would go flying the next time that he babysat and giving you a big kiss on the cheek. Bruce and Natasha arrived next, losing Wanda and Pietro instantly as you grabbed the other littles' hands and pulled them into your Wonderland. Natasha just laughed, seeing how entranced and excited you were.

"You two did it, you nailed it," she praised, playfully slugging Steve on the shoulder. "Although I will say you may have gone just the teensiest bit overboard," she said, an eyebrow arched playfully.

Bucky shrugged as Steve blushed. "I seem to recall a certain couple hiring and flying out Sokovian acrobats to put on a show for the twins' last birthday," Bucky tossed back playfully at her. Bruce chuckled low, putting his arm around his wife.

"He's got us there, love," he said, grinning at her.

Tony, Pepper, and Peter arrived soon after, causing all you littles to shriek with joy and pull Peter into the melee, which he joined happily.

"Wow," Pepper said simply, smiling and trying to contain her giggles at the craziness surrounding her. "You guys really outdid yourselves!" she said heartily. Tony looked around, then sidled right up to her.

"You DO realize that I am going to throw this in your face absolutely every time you accuse ME of going overboard for Pete," he said in his nonchalant tone, gesturing to the fantastical play land. Pepper just rolled her eyes and smiled.

The whole gang was quick to arrive after that. Nick, Maria, Rhodey, Thor and Jane, Darcy, Scott and Hope, Loki, Sylvie, and Prince Loki, Clint, Laura and all their kids, including Kate. Laura came and found you right away, giving you a huge hug- she always gave the best hugs ever.

"Happy Birthday, angel!" she said, squeezing you tight.

"Tank you, Aunt Laura!!" you said, giggling. You latched onto her hand, pulling her to the refreshment table. "Lookit, Papa and Daddy got me a COOKIE CAKE!!"

"Oh wow, that is so great! And so YOU!" she said, teasing and tickling you. You squealed in laughter before the gang called you back to play, and you took off running. Laura looked at the table. The paper dessert plates seemed to be a mix of Frozen, Phineas and Ferb, and purple sparkly ones. She tilted her head and looked up quizzically at Steve and Bucky.

"Internet," they both said, looking very proud of themselves.

"Ah," Laura said simply, nodding with a polite smile.

After a loud and raucous time, after the cookie cake was devoured and all the presents opened and all the games played, everyone went home. Steve and Bucky had gotten clearance to clean up the next day so they could spend this entire day focused on you. As they were getting you ready for bed, they got grateful texts from every caregiver in the Tower- all the littles were worn out from all the fun and had gone down easily.

You were the same- happy but exhausted from all the excitement and activity. "Best birfday ever," you murmured before your "I love you"s, a final squeeze to each of them, and falling asleep, tucked in between the two people who wanted to give you the world- and delivered today.

[tw-inkl-e-tit-s]

✩-Soulmate-✩

Pairing: Miguel Cazarez Mora x Fem!Reader

Word count: 4.9k

Type: Fluff

Warnings: LOTS of cussing, fake blood, fake weapons, just horror maze things, Readers ex-boyfriend is a peepee head

| Miguel Cazarez Mora Masterlist

Y/N'S POV

I was scrolling threw my phone when my daughter busted threw the door of my bedroom. "Mom we need to talk!" she said walking over to my bed and climbing in it.

"Um yeah, you should be in bed," I laughed at her scrunched-up face.

"No Mom, I'm talking about my birthday tomorrow, You promised we would go to Halloween horror nights with Dad." I looked down at my hands.

She must have heard the conversation I was having with her father over the phone, She is so nosey. I didn't know how to tell her that her dad wants nothing to do with her anymore, Because honestly how do you? I told him that he didn't have to come if he was going to show his ass and that I and Gracie would stay home and celebrate.

"I'm sorry honey, you're dad isn't feeling the best and he canceled last minute," I said trying to come up with something off the top of my head.

"Oh, Well that doesn't mean that you and me can't go!" She shouted, clapping her hands together, she mustered up the best puppy dog eyes I have ever seen.

"Please can we go, Mommy, Please!!" I couldn't resist her adorable face,

"This girl is gonna be the death of me," I thought.

I thought about it a little bit and decided, why not. "Fine, we can go-"

"YESSSS!!" she jumped off the bed and did a goofy dance causing me to laugh.

"You better go get some sleep if you wanna go get ice cream tomorrow." she stopped and looked at me,

"Ice cream!?" I nodded my head smiling,

"GOODNIGHT MOMMY!!" she yelled as she ran to her bedroom. I laughed at my adorable daughter as I reached over and turned off my bedside lamp and fell asleep for the night.

TIME SKIP

We gave our tickets to the guy, he scanned them and gave us our wristbands and we walked in.

I was holding Gracie's hand so she wouldn't run off, "Mom can we please go on that one!!" She said pointing to a hay ride.

I laughed and nodded my head, "Heck yeah, we can!" We walked over and the woman scanned our wristbands, We got on and waited as another group of people got on, it was about nine people and I guess they all knew each other since they all started talking to one another.

There were four girls, three boys, and a woman.

One stuck out to me though, He had long curly brown hair put up in a bun and he had good style, I had to pry my eyes away from him so I didn't look like a creep.

"Mommy look we're moving!!" Gracie screamed, The group looked over at us, A girl with black hair Awed as she looked at Gracie, She didn't look that old,

"She's so cute!" She laughed, The rest of the group stared at me and Gracie now.

"My name is Gracie and I am five!" She said as she put her hand on her hip, They laughed and so did I.

"Well, you are very adorable Gracie," A girl with red hair said, Gracie giggled as she swung her feet on the bench.

"It's my birthday today! My daddy is sick so he didn't get to come," She said smiling, I kinda stiffened as the group looked at me with a sympathetic look, It was like they knew that the dad was a piece of shit.

"Oh really? Well Gracie I hope you have an amazing time," The woman said as she and the group got off the ride,

"I will thank you!!" She yelled as we walked our separate way, The boy with the bun kept staring at me and he defiantly wasn't trying to hide it, I smiled at him and he winked as he walked away to catch up with the group.

"Can we go to that one?" Gracie asked, Pointing to a maze called "The black phone." It looked scary but me and Gracie loved horror so I said yes obviously.

We ran to it and let the guy scan our bands as we walked in. It was slightly dark,

"AHHH!!" Gracie screamed as a guy with a mask and a hatchet popped out of the wall at us,

"I think I shit my pants," I said as Gracie clung onto my arm, I held her close as we continued, We walked into a tiny room and it kinda resembled a basement, there was a bed, a manikin was sitting on it holding a black phone, He kinda looked like one of the boys I saw earlier, dirty blond hair with loose curls.

We heard whispers threw out the room and then a scream was heard, The same guy came out and jumped at me and Gracie,

"AHHHH FUCK YOU!!!" I yelled as I grabbed onto Gracie even more,

"NOOOO AHHH YOU BALD BITCH!!!" She yelled. I was kinda shocked since she never cusses but I didn't say anything cause one I cuss all the time and two she was scared and didn't mean to. We walked out as the man left,

"Mom I think I'm scared," She sighed, I laughed,

"You think?" I said, She glared at me and I held my hands up in defense. We walked out and someone ran at us with a chainsaw, Gracie screamed and ran behind me grabbing my legs, The guy cackled evilly as he ran away.

"You can come out now Grace," I laughed, She grabbed my hand and smiled,

"That was awesome!" She yelled jumping up and down,

"Oh let's go too-" I was cut off by someone shouting,

"Hey!" I looked over to see the same little girl from earlier running at me and Gracie, the great of the group following after her,

"Hiii!" Gracie shouted as she ran up and hugged the girl, She has always been such an affectionate person. The girl laughed as she hugged Gracie back,

"My name is Violet sorry I didn't introduce myself earlier," She said as she shook my hand,

"My name is Y/n," I said, Gracie pulled on my arm as she pointed to"The Haunting of hill house." Maze, I laughed and nodded my head,

"You wanna join Violet?" I asked, She smiled and nodded,

"As long as my friends can come!" She said,

"Of course, they can," I said, we all walked into the maze and it was dark the only thing lighting it up was some candles on the wall and a flickering light above us.

"Nothing is happening-" A person in a black body suit jumped out of the wall and we all screamed, Gracie fell to the ground and took me down with her,

"HOLY SHIT!!" I screamed, The guy from earlier appeared beside me, He laughed as he reached out his arm trying to help me up, I of course took it, Butterflies swarmed my stomach as he gripped my hand, He had very warm and soft hands,

"Mom come on!" Gracie shouted as she dragged me forward.

"Ok, we got this guys!" Gracie said as she took a deep breath, We all laughed at her, She was trying mentally prepare herself for what was next.

"It's hard to see," Violet said as she squinted her eyes, I bumped into something, I shouted as I felt someone grab my arm to stop me from falling,

"It's alright I got you, Come on," The same guy said, he pulled me up and looked at me, He smiled as he looked me up and down, I couldn't stop staring at his lips and he couldn't help but stare at mine, We began leaning in.

I knew this was wrong and I didn't even know him- but he was so cute and it gets lonely sometimes, Having a kid at sixteen inst the best thing, And it is weird when people you're on a date with asay they have to leave because they dint want you to come with baggage. He grabbed my waist, I could feel his breath on my lips, I closed my eyes.

"MIGUEL LET'S GO!!" One of the guys shouted,

"Mommy where are you!?" Gracie yelled and I sighed as I looked forward, I didn't see them anywhere, Great they were ahead of us, I looked back at Miguel who was standing there awkwardly scratching the back of his neck,

"Uh we should catch up," I said, He nodded as he walked fast without me, Ok dick face.

I heard Gracie scream somewhere in the distance and I couldn't help but laugh, Miguel looked at me and smiled, and I smiled back,

"AHH STOP! GO IN!!" Miguel screamed as an alien thing popped out from the corner,

"NOOO NOO STOP!!" I screamed gripping Miguel's arm, I guess he didn't mind since he put his hand over mine, We continued our way through the Maze jumping at every little noise, We walked into a bathroom and a pig with a hatchet jumped out,

"ARE YOU INSANE!?!" Miguel screamed at the pig,

"FUCK I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF!!" I yelled as a slammed into a wall, Miguel laughed as he walked over to me grabbing my hand,

"I think I already did that," He said, I laughed.

"Guys get out," The pig said as he peeked out from behind the shower curtain.

"Bro fuck you, pigs don't speak!" Miguel spat, flipping the guy off, He grabbed my hand and we walked out.

We walked into a circus-like room, A lion jumped out and Miguel screamed and held onto my waist as he hid behind me,

"Is it gone?" I heard him muffle into my neck, his breath tickling me,

"Yeah," I said, thank god it was so dark in here and he couldn't see the blush that took over my face,

"My legs are shaking!" I sighed as I gripped Miguel's arm tighter,

"Wish I could make them," Miguel mumbled,

"What?" I asked looking up at him,

"O-Uh nothing-nothing!" He stuttered looking forward.

Someone jumped out of the bed and started crawling towards me and Miguel,

"OH HELL NO GET THE FUCK BACK IN THE BED!!!" Miguel screamed as he kicked at the person,

"THERE IS A DOOR LOOK!!" I yelled as a drug Miguel away from the creepy-lookin' person. We went to open the door and someone jumped out at us,

"FUCK YOUR MOM!!" I yelled as they ran by me into complete darkness, I and Miguel walked through the door.

it was quiet and nothing was happening, "Are they late?" Miguel asked looking around,

"I guess so," I laughed looking around as well, I looked at Miguel and he was already staring back at me.

I could feel the butterflies swarm in my stomach again as his gaze shifted to my lips, He looked like he was trying to hold himself back,

"Your pretty, and he didn't deserve you," He said,

My brows furrowed, "Gracie's dad, He didn't deserve you, He fumbled real hard with you," he whispered as his gaze shifted to my eyes, I smiled,

"He was a dick, He was toxic and only used me for his own pleasure," I said, tearing up a bit.

"Gracie said he didn't come tonight… because he was sick?" He asked,

"He doesn't want anything to do with Gracie anymore and I didn't know how to tell her so I just said he was sick," I choked, I was finally letting all my pent-up emotions go and it was in front of a random guy.

"Hey, It's alright, I got you," He whispered as he pulled me into a tight hug rubbing my back, He rested his head on top of mine as he shushed me.

"Sorry," I cried into his chest, He lifted my face to look at his,

"You don't have to apologize for that, it isn't your fault that guy is a dick, Someone else could treat you so much better than him!" He said causing me to laugh,

"Yeah, who? Nobody wants someone who has a kid 'cause that's not attractive," I said, His eyes softened and we made eye contact, his hand was still on my jaw,

"I could treat you better, So much better." He whispered as he looked at my lips and then back to my eyes.

I began to breath heavy as he leaned in, and his hands slid down my body making their way to my waist, His lips crashed with mine. I was shocked at first but soon relaxed into it, his hands slithered under my shirt as he began gripping my waist, He broke away from the kiss and began kissing along my jawline to my neck, It was getting hot, He sucked onto my neck as his hands made their way up my waist some more,

"So pretty," He whispered as he kissed down my neck,

"Miguel," I breathed as he inched his hands up my stomach some more.

We pulled away screaming when we heard a chainsaw go off, and a guy with a knife came running towards us, Miguel grabbed my hand and we ran out.

We stopped and looked at each other, We busted out laughing,

"Holy shit!" I shouted as I placed my hand on my chest, Miguel laughed as he pulled me close to him placing a kiss on my forehead, He backed me up into a corner,

"So where were we?" He smirked,

"Oh no I am not dying tonight, We need to hurry and get out of here I need to find Gracie!" I laughed as I pushed him away. He groaned as he grabbed onto my arm,

"FINE!" He shouted, I giggled as we began walking.

We turned the corner and as soon as we did a guy in a baby mask jumped out at us and Miguel screamed and ran away leaving me,

"MIGUEL AHHH!!!" I screamed as the person came running towards me, I got up and ran to the other room, I heard Miguel scream as he came running back into the room, He was out of breath,

"THE BITCH IS FUCKING CLIMBING ON THE WALLS!!" He yelled, we both got up and ran. We heard laughing and giggling coming from behind us, I was crying at this point and Miguel was screaming like a little girl at every jumpscare.

Somebody grabbed Miguel's arm and he screamed, He grabbed me and threw me at them, they screamed at me and I got off of them running away.

"I FUCKING HATE YOU MIGUEL!!" I yelled as I hit his arm,

"OWW!" He Whined rubbing his arm, We finally made it out of the maze and I let out a breathy sigh,

"OH THANK GOD!!" I said trying to catch my breath,

"Jesus I think I shit myself!" Miguel laughed as he walked up and hugged me, He gently grabbed my jaw and kissed me,

"Mommy! MOMMY!" I heard, I quickly pulled away seeing Gracie running at me with a huge hello kitty stuffy and some pink cotton candy. She was smiling big, the rest of the group following behind her.

"Mom look what I got!" She said showing me her things,

"I see, who got them for you!?" I laughed bending down to her height to give her a big hug.

"Mason got them for me!" She smiled pointing towards the guy in the white shirt, He smiled and waved his card at me.

"Thank you so much," I said, He shook his head laughing,

"No problem, I couldn't say no to her," He laughed.

"Ooh let's go on the roller coaster, Mom!" Gracie yelled jumping up and down, she grabbed my arm as she took off towards

"trust fall tower." yeah that totally doesn't sound like it will make you shit yourself. Miguel grabbed onto my hand as we made our way onto the ride. The group was giving us weird looks but we just ignored it.

"Mom, hold my hand," Gracie said, I grabbed her hand and the cart started moving. We went up and the cart dropped down,

"FUCK!!" Gracie yelled gripping my hand tighter, We stopped and everyone was breathing heavily.

"Get me off this thing!" Violet said, The guy let us off,

"I need to go to the bathroom and piss," Mason said as he ran towards a gift shop, We laughed as we walked in said gift shop. They had candy, stuffies, and shirts everywhere.

Miguel and Gracie had abandoned me to go look at some bandanas together. I felt someone lock their arm with mine, I jumped slightly and looked at them, It was the red-headed girl from earlier, She smiled as she looked down at me,

"Hi, I'm Brooke!" She said,

"I couldn't help but see you and Miguel kissing when you came out of the Maze earlier and I just wanted to say you guys look super cute together!" She giggled, I smiled and looked down,

"You think so?" I asked, She gasped dramatically,

"Girl the way he looks at you, I can tell he likes you." She said, I looked over at Miguel and Gracie, He was holding her up on his shoulders so she could pick out the shirt she wanted, He looked over at me and blew me a kiss, I blushed and blew him a kiss back.

"SEE!" Brooke shouted, Scaring some of the people in there.

"He is in love with you," She sighed.

"I guess I should ask him out right?" I asked, looking back at Miguel who was now walking over carrying Gracie with him, She was asleep with her arms wrapped around his neck.

"Hey, I need to talk to you," He asked nervously, Brooke smiled and walked away. I looked back at Miguel who was now looking at the ground,

"What do you wanna talk about?" I asked, He looked at me and smiled,

"I really like you y/n… and I wanna know if you would like to go out with me, You don't have to I understand," He started to ramble looking everywhere but at me.

I smiled at how nervous he was, He certainly wasn't nervous a few minutes ago with his tongue down my throat and his hands up my shirt. I leaned in and kissed him, He was surprised at first but relaxed into it, We pulled away smiling at each other.

"I would love to go out with you Miguel," I said, He smiled leaning in to kiss me again.

"YAYYY!!" Gracie yelled scaring me and Miguel,

"I thought you were asleep," Miguel laughed,

"No, I just wanted to be carried!" She giggled.

We all went back to my place to celebrate Gracies birthday and have cake, It was a wonderful night and I know for a fact that I had found my soulmate.

Taglist: @vancehopperenthusiast @bradyhepner @deadghosy @finneyblakes @mnsnloverhey @jayceflwrs @bookobsessedfreak

[speckle-meow-meow]

hey, here's an idea. since it's my birthday today-though it'll probably be long past when you answer this lol-could i have headcanons for the welcome home doing something for it? i figure that headcanons would be easier for everyone. if you only want to do some of them, any three of wally, frank, sally, julie, or howdy is fine. thank you and have a good day!

Dude I am so sorry happy late birfday...

Warning: wee bit of angst

It was your birthday

And everyone knew

So they decided to throw a surprise party!

It was 7 am when you woke up, you felt happier than usual because it was a very special day for you. It was your birthday!!!

Which ment....

BIRTHDAY PANCAKES (or whatever preferred breaky)

After you finished your breakfast you got dressed, you decided to doll up a little and add a little spice to your clothing.

And a little bit of makeup (ik not everyone wears makeup but like... Please let me have this 🥺👉👈)

You looked fantastic!

After you sorted yourself out you left home and made your way to Howdys bug- I mean Bodega.

Everyone saw that you looked slightly different

More pep in your step and more dressy than usual

And they knew why

You stepped inside the Bodega sort of expecting a "HELLO Y/N happy birthday" but it never came.

In all honesty in made you a bit sad but, not everyone has to remember your birthday, especially when you don't remember most people's birthdays. (Not me calling myself out..)

"Hello howdy! How are you today?" You grinned towards your fuzzy tall four armed friend

"Oh hello y/n! I'm doing great! What about you?" He turned to face you

"I'm doing great! After all it is a very special day for me! Which means I'm going to buy a (dessert of choice)!" You giggled hoping that he would know what day it was

But he didn't

"Of course!" He grabbed some metal tongs and grabbed your dessert, putting it into a small box then putting it in your hands "alright there ya go! Enjoy!"

You smiled but it was a meek smile

It pained howdy when you didn't show your usual bright smile

He had to resist telling you happy birthday

After all he couldn't ruin the surprise right?

But oh boy was he wrong...

You passed everyone each hoping you'd have a great day and nothing else, not even Frank who seemed to remember everything said happy birthday

You suppressed the urge to cry until you reached your home. When you got there you threw the dessert you got from the Bodega into the trash. To you it would taste to bitter.

We're you being a bit petty? Or over reacting? Maybe.. But it was your birthday...

Once they saw you go into your house they all prepared poppy barn for your party

Poppy made the sweets

Julie and Sally were discussing activities

Wally was keeping watch just incase you were gonna show up

Frank was putting your presents on a table

Howdy was helping Eddie make decorations while handing/putting them around

Later Julie put a note in an envelope running to your house and putting it on your porch then running after knocking on your door.

You heard the knocks and checked seeing the envelope on the ground.

You picked it up and closed your door, then reading the contents

It was an invite

Deciding not to let your sadness get in the way you got dresses again making yourself presentable, and left.

You arrived at Poppy's and opened the doors

It was quiet, until you heard a loud

"SURPRISE!!!"

Everyone was there!

They did remember!

The night was fully of fun and laughter

You even forgot what your were sad about because you realized that they did remember.

{God's you don't know how much I had to restrain myself to not make it to angsty, anyways I hope you liked this anon and happy late birthday! As always hearts and reblogs are always welcomed along with questions, comments, and requests}

[cecilysass]

Tonight We're Gonna Party Like It's 1999

An epilogue to The Boy on the Beach. Read The Boy on the Beach on AO3 or on Tumblr. Read this epilogue on AO3. Tagging @today-in-fic

In the other multiverse.

Baltimore, Maryland February 23, 1983

“Sweetie.” Her mother’s face appeared in the crack of the door. “Do you think you’re almost ready? You’ve made Marcus sit down there with your father and Charlie for twenty minutes now. And our reservation is at seven, so we really can’t be too much longer.”

“Yes,” Dana said. “Almost finished.” In the mirror she peered into her own eyes, which were smudged with black. Her eyeliner was as heavy as she dared for dinner with her family, which truthfully wasn’t very heavy at all.

In Dana’s imagination her entire wardrobe was going to have been transformed in college. She would have been edgier, harder, swathed in black, jagged corners. A semester and a month in, and that hadn’t really happened. Her forays into rebellion had been modest and disappointing. A few band T-shirts, leather bracelets, scarcely noticeable.

Tonight she wore a new dress. Dark detailed lace, a dramatic ruffled neckline. She purchased it at a shop near campus because she thought it had a drastic, punk rock feel. She’d expected a few raised eyebrows when she arrived at her parents’ house tonight. Instead, her mother had smiled and told her she looked lovely. Looking at herself now in the mirror, pale face, dark dress, gold cross at her neck, she realized why. She looked like she could be taking holy vows.

“You know, you’re just sitting there,” her sister observed with amusement. She was lounging on Dana’s bed, already dressed. She had a torn denim jacket, feathery hair, makeup as dark as night. Missy’s forays into rebellion had always been fearless. “You’re not getting ready. You are ready.”

“I’m checking over my make-up.”

“No, you’re stalling. You’re making us late to your own birthday dinner on purpose.”

“What are you talking about?” Dana sighed wearily, examining the jawline of her uninteresting baby face again.

Missy sprung to her feet and leaned over Dana’s shoulder, looking at her reflection in the mirror, whispering playfully in her ear. “You’re waiting for something.”

“Oh yeah? What am I waiting for?”

“You should be ashamed of yourself, with Marcus down there making conversation with Dad,” Missy said. “Boring little Marcus.”

“Marcus isn’t boring.”

“Oh, Dana,” Missy laughed. “You’re such a faker. I see right through you.”

“I don’t have any idea what you’re talking about,” Dana said, rolling her eyes.

“You want to wait around here just in case you get your birthday phone call.”

Dana moved to blot her red lipstick without betraying any real expression.

“From your childhood soulmate,” Missy added knowingly. “Your personal Kennedy.”

“He’s not my childhood soulmate,” Dana said primly. “He’s not a Kennedy.”

“Your dark prince of Massachusetts.”

“He’s not in Massachusetts,” Dana said in a contrary tone. “He’s in college in England.”

Missy folded her arms. “I suppose you haven’t thought about his call at all today.”

Dana sighed again. “Fox does normally call on my birthday, but I’m not exactly sitting around waiting for that.”

“No?”

“Actually, I doubt he will call now—it’s late there. I’m honestly just trying to finish getting ready.”

“Okay.” Missy seemed to be biting back a smile.

Dana pursed her lips and pushed a strand of hair behind her ear, but met her sister’s amused eyes in the mirror.

“You make everything so over dramatic, Missy.”

Missy just raised an eyebrow.

“Fox and I shared a strange childhood experience,” Dana said. “We’re friends. Pen pals. He’s an interesting person.”

“Very interesting,” nodded Missy.

“His sister writes to me, too, you know,” Dana pointed out. “And I haven’t seen them in ages. Not even since we moved back to the East Coast.”

Missy reached over Dana’s shoulder and over the vanity table, fishing out the snapshot of Fox on a beach that Dana had discreetly slid underneath her jewelry box. She held it up in front of Dana’s face like it was damning evidence.

Dana kept her expression disinterested. “What? He sent a photo from college.”

“Mmmm, I see that,” Missy said, looking it over. “You’re keeping it pretty close at hand.”

“What’s your point?”

“Look, Dana,” Missy said, sounding exasperated, “he saves you as a kid, he tells you you and he are bound together by fate, he writes you letters, he calls you every year. It’s romantic. You’d have to be made of stone not to see that. I don’t blame you. Nobody in the world would blame you. You don’t have to hide it.”

Dana didn’t say anything, her eyes on the photo in Missy’s fingers. He actually didn’t save her from anything, at least not according to him. According to him, the hero of the story was someone else.

Her. Her, but not her. An unrecognizable version of Dana Scully. Some superhuman, unattainable adult version.

Dana herself doesn’t remember what happened that week in 1973. She only remembers finding herself on a fairy tale beach with two fairy tale children who insisted she had a special destiny and gave her a letter from herself that seemed to confirm it.

The story has always been convoluted, and she’s always been partially sworn to secrecy.

“And holy fucking fuck.” Missy was looking hard at the photo, shaking her head. “You can’t tell me you haven’t noticed your little soulmate turned out smoking hot. That’s a nice favor for fate to do for you.”

Dana had noticed, actually. She still hated Missy’s characterization of her relationship with Fox, hated it for so many reasons.

“Enough, Missy.” She reached behind her and snatched the photo out of her sister’s fingers. “Let’s go downstairs now.”

“I could stall them downstairs for a few more minutes,” offered Missy, her tone softer. “I could say I feel sick?”

“Really,” Dana said. “You’re misreading the situation.”

“Am I?”

“Yes.” Dana set her lips in a line.

“Okay,” Missy shrugged.

“Okay.”

“Then let’s go put our game faces on,” Missy said. “Prepare to eat large steaks and avoid talking politics with Bill.” She put her hands on Dana’s shoulders. “You look amazing, by the way. I like your dress.”

“Thank you,” Dana said, her face warming into a small smile in the mirror. “I don’t look like a nun?”

“Maybe a little. Like a hot nun,” Melissa assured her. Dana slapped her hand in jest.

On the way downstairs, the phone didn’t ring. But that was okay. That was fine. She wasn’t waiting for it. Not really.

*** Later, after they arrived back from dinner, after Dana had opened her presents, after they had eaten angel food cake topped with chocolate whipped cream icing and nineteen candles, after she had kissed Marcus a sweet but surprisingly chaste good-bye outside at his car, promising to call him soon (once she was back in her dorm, maybe on the weekend), the phone did ring.

She was standing at the bathroom mirror brushing her teeth, wearing an oversized tee of Bill’s from high school. Everyone else had already gone to bed, although she suspected Charlie was still awake because she could hear the Clash playing faintly from his room.

The phone rang and she froze, her toothbrush in her mouth. Then she flung it down and raced down the stairs as fast as she could, trying to get there before it woke up her parents.

She made it in two and a half rings. “Hello,” she said breathlessly as she picked up the kitchen phone.

“Hello?” It’s funny how familiar his voice was, considering how relatively few times she had actually spoken to him. “Dana…?”

“Yeah,” she said, still breathing hard from her little sprint. “It’s me. Sorry. I just ran from upstairs.”

“Did I wake you?”

“No,” she smiled, biting her lip. “No, I’m awake.”

“I almost missed it. I’m too late.”

“You’re not late,” she assured him quickly. “It’s still my birthday. But isn’t it the middle of the night there? Shouldn’t you be asleep?”

He laughed a little, and she noticed for the first time he was keeping his voice down. “Yeah,” he agreed. “I probably should be.”

Dana pressed her back against the kitchen wall and slowly slid down until she was sitting on the floor. She brought her knees in towards her, hugging them, winding the phone cord around a finger.

“So,” he said. “Dana Scully. Nineteen years old. How does it feel?”

“Much the same.”

“How’s college?”

“It’s…” Dana selected her words carefully, always too aware of what he thought about her. “It’s amazing. I love it. The work is so much more interesting than high school. The conversation is at a higher level.”

“So you just study, all day and night, and that’s Dana Scully’s whole life at University of Maryland?”

“I do take my work seriously,” she said, stiffening. “I know it’s not Oxford, but I take challenging classes.”

“Of course you do,” he said, his tone gentle. “I just meant to ask what you did outside of class.”

“Right,” she said. She knew she was too sensitive. He had never given her any reason to feel so, but she felt self-conscious, her modest, budget-minded state university education versus his elite international schooling. “Well, I have a job working at the library. I, uh, play intramural volleyball.” She swallowed. “I was going to try for a job in a lab for next year.”

“You’re studying science?”

“Yes.” She pressed her eyes closed, anticipating the next line of questioning.

“Do you know your major yet? Is it… do you know what you want to do?”

She knew what he was thinking—because this is what he did, Fox. He asked her a question, and he seemed deeply and intensely interested in her, but he actually was thinking about someone else. This woman, this stranger he and Samantha called Scully: a woman she had never met.

“Not really,” she said.

There was a little pause. “It’s probably too soon to worry about your major. That’s what’s good about American universities—you can explore different fields of study.”

Dana decided to change the subject. “Your sister sent me something for my birthday.”

“Wow. Really?”

“Really. It was wrapped and everything.”

“I’m offended. She didn’t send me anything for my birthday.”

“It arrived in my school mailbox the day before yesterday.” Dana was smiling, wrapping the phone cord around her wrist.

“What was it?”

“A record,” Dana said coyly. “A single. No card or note—besides her name, obviously.”

“A record? You’re kidding me. What record?”

“Prince.”

“Prince?” He paused. “Why would she—” He stopped. “1999, right?”

“Bingo.”

She could hear him laughing on the other end, trying to keep his sound muffled. “Shit. She’s … such a weirdo,” he breathed. “But that’s funny. I wish I had thought of that.”

“As it happens, I like the song.”

“Sam has great taste and a subversive sense of humor, but she’s really baffling my parents,” Fox said. “I think it’s not all sunshine and roses in the Mulder household since I left. We can’t all be well-behaved first children. But only one more semester until she’s off to college, too.”

“Does she want to go to Oxford?”

“She wants to go to Berkeley,” Fox said. “In California.” He hesitated. “According to her, there was something 99 Me and 99 You said about a scientist there who studies neurology, which somehow mysteriously leads to time travel. I hadn’t quite heard all of the details of that before, but Samantha is adamant.”

Dana took that in.

Unlike Fox, Samantha had always been slower to talk about the events of that week in November 1973. Her story had always come out in fragments, little tantalizing mentions that emerge unexpectedly, sometimes years later.

In some ways this was frustrating, as Samantha had the most information. She was the person who met both 99 Dana and 99 Fox, who actually saw them interact with one another. She spent the night in a beach house with both of them. Fox had only met 99 Dana, and Dana met neither of them, unless you counted the letter.

“So what did you do for your birthday?��� he asked.

“I went to dinner with my family,” Dana said. She hesitated a half second. “And with my boyfriend, Marcus.”

“This is the same boyfriend? From high school?”

“Yes,” Dana said. “He’s—yes.”

“He goes to your college?”

“No,” she said. “He goes to UVA, but he drove over for dinner.”

“Oh,” Fox said. “That’s nice of him.” He didn’t sound insincere, but he didn’t exactly sound warm either.

“I guess so.”

“You guess so?”

“It was nice. But I think I’m going to break up with him.”

He paused. “Why?”

“I don’t—“ She didn’t know why she was telling him this. “I don’t think about him when I’m not with him.”

“Ah,” he said.

“Does that make sense to you? As a reason to break up with someone?”

“It makes perfect sense to me.”

“It seems like you should think about someone you’re with. Even if you’re not with them at that precise moment. If the relationship is important.”

“I’m not exactly an expert, but I think that’s probably right,” he said.

There was a pause.

“Are you dating someone?” she asked.

“No,” he said. “Not any more. I was, until fairly recently.”

“I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay. It was amicable.”

“Tell me about her.”

“She was smart, funny. Her name was Aine. She was—she’s really involved in the anti-nuclear movement here, protesting against Margaret Thatcher.”

“Were you involved with that, too?”

“Yeah,” he said. “Especially while I was dating Aine. She’s very … persuasive. Dedicated.”

“What does she look like?”

There was a pause.

“She’s beautiful.”

Dana found herself fairly certain Aine had red hair.

It was overwhelming, really. She didn’t know what to make of him and his early-minted taste for heroic redheads. She wished Samantha had never mentioned it.

“It feels weird to talk about it with you, Dana,” he said softly. “Even though I know it shouldn’t.”

“Why would it feel weird?”

“You know why.”

Because sixteen years from now she would supposedly be the love of his life. Sixteen years from now she supposedly would love him so much that she would go to some dire lengths to save him.

“I’m sorry,” he said. “I always seem to make you feel uncomfortable.”

“No, you don’t,” she replied. “I just sometimes worry … “

“What?”

“That I’m not the person you want me to be.”

“I want you to be yourself.”

“I think you want me to be someone you met when you were a kid.”

“You are Scully,” he said. “You can’t help but be her.”

Another little pause. She cleared her throat.

“I’ve been doing a little research on the camera,” she said. “Do you want a report?”

“Of course I want a report.”

When they left, 99 Dana and 99 Fox had left behind an intriguing artifact from the future: some kind of headset that 99 Dana told Fox and Samantha was a camera, although it no longer seemed to work. Fox and Samantha had spent years tinkering with it, but had sent it to Dana last year at her request.

“I’ve been going to some local technology clubs. Personal computing. Like at Radio Shack.”

“Oh yeah?” He sounded amused. “What’s that like?”

“Well, I’ve had many offers of help,” she said diplomatically. She didn’t want to affect his view of her, but really it was amazing what you could manifest as a college girl walking into a Radio Shack with pigtails, Jordache jeans, and your younger brother’s too-small Atari T-shirt. Offers of help from every direction, really.

“And?”

“You can learn quite a bit there, and I’m getting pretty good at it. I’m thinking of taking a programming class next semester, actually.”

“Computer programming? Wow.” He sounded perplexed.

“The camera is a type of computer, or it has computers in it,” she explained. “It’s beyond what anyone has seen now though. I’ve had a lot of help—some experts willing to look at the camera with me, analyze it closely. Right now it’s probably not working because it’s out of batteries, but its power source is totally different than what we have.”

“Huh,” Fox said. “What if you could get it to work again?”

“I think it’s possible,” she said. “Someone helping me—this man Melvin—he says he knows people in California, in Silicon Valley, who would know more. I was wondering if somehow I could take it out to show them this spring or summer, on one of my breaks.”

“That would be great!” Fox exclaimed. “If it worked, we could take pictures of our own. Messages, maybe.”

“Not right away. Maybe eventually.”

“I wonder where the pictures would go.”

“Back to 99 Dana and 99 Fox’s universe, I suppose,” Dana said. “That’s where her pictures were going, right?”

“Yeah. But it’s been ten years,” Fox said. “It must be 2009 there now, if time moves forward in the same way. I wonder if they even have a way to receive the pictures any more.”

“It could be more time until I can make the camera work,” Dana reminded him. “There’s still a lot to figure out. The power source on this camera, it’s tiny. And the part of the camera that is actually a computer? Fox, it is so impossibly small, like a whole Apple computer shrunk down. It’s fascinating.”

“Do you enjoy it?” he asked. “Trying to figure it out? Solve the puzzle? It sounds like you do.”

The question surprised her, in part because she hadn’t thought of it quite like that. She enjoyed trying to help Fox and Samantha, and she found the computers part much more interesting than she thought she would. But the answer to his question was unexpectedly clear to her.

“Yeah,” she said. “I do. I really like the challenge of it.”

“I’m glad,” he said. “That’s really good.” There was something in his tone that made her worry, like he was comparing her to Scully again, but the conversation took a different turn.

“Dana,” he began, sounding hesitant. “I, uh, got a call. From someone from the F.B.I., asking me if I would be willing to talk to someone in their recruitment office about a possible career in profiling after I graduate, or while I do graduate work in psychology.”

“Oh.” She breathed in. “That’s—“

“It seems like that’s the beginning of … how it’s supposed to happen.”

Dana let that sink in. “Profiling. As in dangerous criminals? Is that what we did in 1999?”

“I never heard the exact area of the F.B.I. we worked in. I know you were a doctor. For me, profiling does make sense, based on what I have been working on in school.”

She didn’t say anything for a moment. She had weighed the idea of medical school eventually, but it wasn’t the only thing she considered. Lately, she had thought more seriously about computer science. “Do you think all of this happens no matter what we do? That it’s fated, somehow? That our choices don’t matter?”

“Do you think you wouldn’t choose the F.B.I.?”

“I don’t know,” she said sincerely. “I just think I would like to be able to make the choice.”

A pause on the line. “I guess that’s what I really wanted to talk to you about. I’ve been thinking about that, too.”

“About which part?”

“About whether it has to be set in stone.”

She was faintly surprised. She assumed Fox always wanted to chase after a future that he thought got him as close to what Scully described as he could.

“The call from the F.B.I. isn’t the only call I got,” he explained. She heard him rustling around, like he was shifting position. “I got another offer. Something badly paid and probably not very smart. My friend Miles is an old classmate who’s already graduated and has been working as a counselor in a clinic. He’s in San Francisco, doing grief work and end-of-life counseling with men dying from this new disease, this epidemic. You probably know about it.”

“AIDS,” supplied Dana. “Probably viral. No one knows for sure.”

“Yeah. Whatever it is, it’s a lot of young people dying too fast, often alone, and there’s a huge need for counselors and therapists to help them. Miles says he works sometimes 20 hours a day, but the work is really worthwhile. I was thinking that might be something I could be good at. I’m sometimes good at helping people think through bigger questions.”

“So you’re wondering if you should do that instead.”

“I guess I am,” he said. “I could do it for a while and think about whether I wanted to continue graduate studies in psychology, or go straight into the F.B.I. … or something else. Plus, if Sam is at Berkeley, it’s right there in the Bay Area. I could keep an eye on her.”

Dana was silent for a moment. “It sounds like you already know what choice you want to make.”

He made a stifled half laugh. “Of course I don’t.”

“You sound more excited about the counseling in San Francisco than about the F.B.I.,” she commented.

“That’s true,” he said really softly, like this was a realization. “I am, I guess.”

“But you’re still…?”

“Scared,” he said. “Because if I choose something different, I worry that I…” He stopped. “Well, I worry.”

She didn’t speak either.

“The relationship 99 Dana had with 99 Me—that wasn’t the kind of possibility you could see in your future … and just ignore,” he said. “I can’t see just tossing that away, Dana.”

“Can you explain to me why?” she asked in a small voice.

“I don’t know if I can, except that … here I was, this lonely kid, and the way she talked about us being partners...” He laughed quietly. “I’ll never, ever stop thinking about being her partner.”

“Yeah,” Dana whispered, feeling tears spring in her eyes.

“But I get it,” he said. “I know it might not ever work here, the way it did there. Too many variables have changed.”

“It doesn’t mean you couldn’t be happy in other futures,” Dana pointed out. She twirled the phone cord around her finger idly. “With other people.”

“I guess,” he said. He seemed to let out a long sigh. “You know, right before the holidays, I was in London with Aine.” Dana slumped against the wall a little, closing her eyes, trying to picture what he was saying. “We went out to this club with her friends. They got me all dressed up—that whole New Wave look, you know? Eyeliner and ruffly shirt and all the shit in your hair to make it poufy. It’s not my normal thing, but it was fun. People seemed to like it.”

Dana thought about the photo on her dressing table and imagined it. She thought she could guess why people might have liked it.

“So we’re in this place, and it’s crowded, and there are all these colored lights, strobes, and they’re playing that Duran Duran song, the really popular one. Hungry Like the Wolf. And Aine was talking to me about her Christmas plans, and my eyes just sort of drifted away from her, losing focus into the crowd. All these bodies, dancing. Trying to just connect with one another. Scent and a sound. Juices like wine. Hungry like the wolf. And I thought… why am I here? Why am I doing all of this? Why am I pretending to be looking for someone else, trying to make these futile, fleeting connections, when I already know my perfect other exists?”

There was a pause on the line.

“But…” Dana blinked, stunned. “I’m not your perfect other, Fox.” Her body was rigid; she gripped the phone with white knuckles. “I’m not your perfect anything. I’m just some … girl from Maryland. Some girl who likes to spend most of her time studying and has never even been to a club like you’re talking about.”

“That’s not all you are,” he replied.

“I don’t even know if I really am Scully.”

“You are. I told you. It’s not something you can—”

“No.” She was surprised at how fiercely she spoke. “No, please hear me on this. I need it to be okay with you … if I’m not. I need to be free not to be.”

A tense beat.

“Oh,” he said. “Right, yeah.”

“I’m sorry,” she said.

“No,” he answered, his voice subdued. “I’m sorry.”

In the hollow silence that followed, Dana’s mind raced. She could practically feel the weight of his disappointment through the phone.

Would this be the end of his interest in her? Would the calls end? What possible appeal could she hold without the promise of a secret agent future? Maybe it would be better to say goodbye, she considered. Maybe this childhood fantasy had gone on long enough. Didn’t it only ever make her feel like she was a lesser Dana? Why did she need that? She could live her own life and never feel that way again.

If it weren’t for Scully’s letter, she might have heeded that impulse.

Instead, she reconsidered. And found herself taking hold of a wild idea, something she could hardly believe she was going to propose.

“Fox,” she said, “maybe you should go to San Francisco and see the clinic for yourself. Before you decide what you want to do.”

“Maybe,” he said, sounding glum.

“Maybe you should come with me when I take the camera to the Bay Area. We could go together.”

It took a moment to sink in. “Together?”

“We must have some overlapping school breaks at some point. We could fly out, investigate the camera together, visit your clinic. You could ask all the questions you need to.”

She again could hear the rustling sounds indicating his squirming. “That’s… an interesting idea.”

“I think it would be a good opportunity for you… to gather information for yourself. Firsthand.”

“Firsthand,” he repeated. “Yeah.”

“You’d probably think of other questions to ask about the camera, too. Things I wouldn’t think of.”

“I’ve never been to San Francisco,” he said. “Maybe we could … walk across the Golden Gate Bridge while we’re there.”

“Okay,” she said. “If there’s time.”

“Or go see a giant redwood.”

“The to-do list grows longer,” she said wryly.

“Or ride a streetcar. Or eat seafood. Or go see that one really crooked street. I always wanted to do that.”

Dana smiled, stretching her legs out in front of her. She couldn’t tell if he was responding entirely seriously or not, but she felt a little giddy that she had summoned enough courage to invite him, to shift the conversation in this direction.

“You know,” he said suddenly and earnestly, “it’d be fun to drive, not fly. I’ve always wanted to drive across the continent. I have this amazing old station wagon that could probably make it. I could pick you up in Maryland.”

“That’s a much longer trip,” she commented, but her face was warming with pleasure. He seemed very serious. “It would be fun though.” She imagined Bill and Maggie’s expressions, watching their daughter climb into a car for a cross country road trip all alone with the strange boy they had met ten years ago on Martha’s Vineyard.

“If we could make it work, matching up the school breaks, would you really consider it? Going with me, I mean? You’re not just saying that?”

And she was struck by the vulnerability in his voice.

“Yes,” she said crisply. “Of course.”

“I’m not as strange as I come across in these phone calls,” he promised. “If we went, you could get to know me better.” A little intake of breath. “Just me. Nothing else. No expectations of anyone being anyone else, like you said.”

She was so used to thinking of him as her mysterious fairy tale boy, someone who dropped into her life simply to check to see if she had grown into someone she was not. It surprised her to realize he was anxious for her approval, too. That he was worried about how she viewed him.

“Sure,” she managed. “And you know, I’ve always wanted to tour Stanford, too.”

“Then it’s settled,” he said. “Let’s make it happen.”

“Do you have a calendar of your school schedule?”

“I’ll go get one,” he said.

She listened as the phone dropped and he made thumping noises to run off, presumably to his room. He sounded so… eager. Dana smiled to herself, wondering what it would be like to drive in a car with him across the country. If he would drive her crazy with his peculiar energy. If he would insist on driving off the interstate on little side trips. If he would make them camp or stay at cheap motels. She found herself insatiably curious.

*** They stayed up too late hammering out a rough plan before finally saying good-bye, and Dana padded speedily back up the stairs to her bedroom, her heart still thumping, her mind still buzzing.

She flew straight into her closet and yanked the drawstring to turn on the overhead bulb. Her eyes ran over the shelves, looking for what she wanted, until she spotted it: the old cracked leather box. She lifted it from the shelf and took it to her bed to examine.

Inside the leather box were letters, filed carefully in reverse date order starting from 1982, last year, going back to 1973. Fox and Samantha’s handwriting alternated, the penmanship getting increasingly rounder and younger as she flipped farther back in time.

She found what she was looking for. The very first letter, which wasn’t from Fox or Samantha. It was preserved in its original envelope.

Dana. said the lettering on the front.

The handwriting was adult and female. She now could see what was not apparent to her as a nine-year old—that it was, in fact, her own handwriting. Or at least that it looked enough like her handwriting at age nineteen to be recognizable.

Dana sat cross-legged on her bed and read the letter for the thousandth time: the letter that had changed her life, the letter that continued to change it.

Dear Dana,

I have never been in a situation like yours, but I imagine you’re very scared. As strange as this may sound, the person writing this is you, Dana Scully, age 35. I traveled from the year 1999 back to your year. When I arrived, you vanished. Now that I have left again, you’ve returned, and you are ready to begin to live your life again. I’m truly sorry that I had to disrupt your life in this way.

I will try to limit this letter only to what is most important. First, it’s not a good idea to believe anything a stranger tells you, so I’ll try to give you some proof we are the same person, and tell you something only you know: In Mass sometimes, you daydream that Father Joplin will one day leave the priesthood and marry you instead. I hope that is enough to convince you. I’ve never told that to anyone. He never will, I’m afraid.

Second, your family has missed you very much, and they have been very worried. Be kind to them once you see them again. Especially Melissa. Always be close to Melissa.

Third, the two children you are with—Fox and Samantha—will act like they know you because they know me, but you won’t know them. Listen to them. They can explain the full story of what happened to you. They will be able to give you most of the answers you want. I imagine they may seem like strange children. But you can trust them, always, especially the boy.

Finally, about the boy, Fox Mulder. I know him as a man very well, but I don’t know what it would be like to know him as young or for as long as you will. If I had to predict, he will be persistent in keeping in touch with you.

His friendship can be difficult at times, but it’s also been something powerful and hard to explain, something big and overwhelming and wonderful. I suppose my advice about Fox Mulder comes down to this: when it comes to him, don’t ever lose sight of yourself. But in the end, he is worth it. He is always worth it.

Yours, Dana Scully

[braveclementine]

I

Warnings: None.

Copyright: I do not own any Marvel characters or locations. I do not condone any copying of this.

Chapter Note: Even though Y/N will be turning twelve, I wrote her a little mentally younger. Every time there is a son or daughter of Stark, they're always brilliant. So I wanted to make her a little handicapped instead. She is brilliant, but she acts a little younger and is treated a little younger than other kids her age. 

Y/N ran home in excitement, backpack still swinging on her back. She waved at the gardener that was digging in the flower beds next to the tower, "Hello Mr. Gates!" 

The middle aged man looked up at her and smiled, waving back, "Hello Ms Stark. How was school today?" 

"It was great! We're learning about World War II in History, so I'm going to ask Mr. Rogers if he can help me study." Y/N said, bouncing on the balls of her feet. "And my birthday is tomorrow and daddy said I could skip school if I wanted to, but I don't think I will. I like school." 

"Well that's good." Mr. Gates said, leaning on his shovel. His slightly graying black hair was combed back and his amber eyes twinkled in kindness. "Don't ever drop out kid, school is a gift." 

"Of course not mister." Y/N said, getting ready to head back to the Compound. 

"How old are you turning?" He asked kindly. 

"Twelve!" Y/N said with excitement. "I have to go though, daddy always gets worried if I'm not in by three forty-five." 

"Of course. Have a blessed day young lady." Mr. Gates said and then went back to digging. Y/N skipped the rest of the way to the Avengers Compound. 

She headed over to her daddy's work area first, F.R.I.D.A.Y. letting her in. "Hi daddy! I'm home." 

"Hey ladybug." Tony said, spinning around in his chair. He set aside the Iron Man helmet that he was working on and opened his arms, letting Y/N run into them. He kissed the top of her head. "How as school today?" 

"It was great! We learned how to calculate the distance between planets and stars in scence, we're learning about World War II in history, and we've moved onto exponents and fractions in math." Y/N said excitedly. "But I hope we kind've speed up on the planets because our next topic is animals!" 

Tony chuckled, "You gonna ask Capsicle about helping you with your history homework?" 

"Daddy, it's not nice to call other people names." Y/N said solemnly, as she always did whenever Tony called someone something other than their names. 

"It's a fun name." Tony said, kissing the tip of her nose, "Like how I call you ladybug. Or do you not want to be many ladybug anymore?" He feigned a hurt look. 

She squealed, wrapping her arms around his neck, "No! I do ! I do!"

Tony laughed, picking her up and carrying her out of his lab. "Okay ladybug. Now run along. Steve and Natasha are upstairs in the kitchen. I'll make sure to eat dinner with you." 

"Okay. Bye daddy." Y/N said and ran up the stairs instead of taking the elevator. 

"Welcome home Y/N." Natasha said, already putting out the saltine crackers with peanut butter on them, along with a glass of milk on the table as Y/N skipped into the room. 

"Hi Auntie Nat. Hi Mr. Rogers." Y/N greeted the two people in the room excitedly, sliding her backpack off the her shoulder and plopping it into the chair next to her. She also saw Loki and grew excited running over to him. "Hi Mr. Loki." 

Loki smiled affectionately at her. "Hey little Stark. How was Midgardian little people jail?" 

Y/N pouted, which Loki thought was adorable. "It's not jail! It's fun! Jail is for bad people!" 

Loki chuckled. "I take it you had a good day?" 

"Yes!" She said and then suddenly grew shy and said, "I have to interview someone that I look up to and I was hoping to interview either you or Teddy." 

Loki smiled. Bless her little heart, wanting to interview the two people that were hated the most on the planet. "Well, how about you as Bucky, okay? I think he'd like that." 

"Yeah, he would." Steve said, smiling over his newspaper. 

"Where is Teddy?" Y/N asked, looking around for Bucky. She had started calling him Teddy from a really young age when she'd heard Steve call him 'Bucky Bear'. And he did have some of the best hugs so she called him Teddy, short for 'Teddy bear'. 

"Him and Uncle Sam are out on a run." Nat said, tapping the plate, "Now eat your snack and drink your milk before you start on your homework." 

Y/N quickly climbed into her seat next to Mr. Rogers and ate her peanut butter crackers and milk. She pulled out her history homework first and asked, "Mr. Rogers, will you help me? It's on World War II." 

"Of course pumpkin." Steve said softly, putting his newspaper to the side. The two of them worked on her homework, going through it quickly, before she moved onto math by herself and then science. 

She looked up in worry as she pulled out her English assignment, "Teddy isn't back yet." 

"He'll be home soon." Nat said with a smile, texting on the phone to Clint who was on a mission with Wanda and Rhodey. "Him and Uncle Sam are bringing pizzas home for dinner." 

"Is Dr. Bruce, Uncle Thor, and daddy going to join?" Y/N asked. 

"Thor is staying on Asgard tonight." Loki said, looking up from his book. "But he'll be down tomorrow for your birthday. And Uncle Strange is going to show up too!" 

Y/N beamed. 

"Hey, do you know what you want for your birthday?" Natasha asked. "Your dad keeps saying you'd want a pony." 

Y/N giggled. "We can't get a pony! Daddy's being silly. But. . ." She looked up thoughtfully. "A puppy would be fun." 

"Yeah?" Nat asked excitedly. She couldn't have her own kids, so Y/N was the closest she could get. And she loved her like her own. Really, they all did, even Loki. "Do you know what kind?" 

"Um. . . one that's good with kids." Y/N said matter of factly. "Like a dalmatian. Or. . ." 

"A golden retriever?" Steve asked. 

Y/N nodded excitedly. "Yeah!" 

Steve and Nat shared a secret smile and then Bucky and Sam came in with the pizzas, followed by Bruce, Tony, and Pietro. 

"Hey hoghead." Bucky teased, wrapping Y/N up in a huge hug. 

"Teddy!" Y/N squealed in excitement. "You're home!" 

"Yep." Bucky said, kissing the top of her head, looking over her shoulder at the homework. "What are the weirdo teachers making you do now?" 

"They're not weird." Y/N pouted adorably. "And this is an essay. I have to interview someone that I look up to. And I was going to ask you and Loki. Loki said to ask you since he was here first. Can I interview you? Please?" 

Bucky was touched that she looked up to him. "Yeah, of course you can Honey bear." 

Y/N beamed again. 

"But you gotta eat first." Sam said with a grin, putting the pizzas down on the counter. Steve got up to help him with the plates. 

"Did you get all of the homework except the essay done?" Tony asked, kissing the side of his daughters head. 

She nodded and said, "But I would like Dr. Bruce to look over my science homework please." 

"Of course I will." Bruce answered, "And you know that you can just call me Bruce, kiddo." 

"I know!" Y/N answered, putting her homework back in her backpack. "But I want to be resp- respectable." 

"Here Angel." Sam said, handing her a plate with two pizza slices on it. 

"Thank you!" 

"So what did you say earlier when I told you Tony wanted to get you a pony?" Nat asked, throwing Tony a teasing smile. 

Y/N giggled, lighting up the moods of every person in the room, "He's silly! We don't have room for a pony!" 

"Sure we do." Tony protested. "We have plenty of space inside!" 

Y/N shook her head and continued to giggle. "Let's get a puppy instead! Or a bunny! Or me and Teddy could get a baby bear!" 

"I like that idea!" Bucky perked up and he held out his fist gently so she could bump it as hard as she could. 

Steve shook his head in amusement. 

They finished dinner quickly. Bucky, Sam, and Y/N ran around the living room, chasing each other with pillows while Bruce looked over Y/N's science homework and the others chatted casually. 

Y/N squealed as Bucky picked her up and flew her over his head. "I'm flying!" 

"Yes you are angel." Sam grinned. "Flying straight-" He leapt up and grabbed her out of Bucky's arms "-into my arms." 

"No!" Y/N giggled, trying to get away. "Daddy! Daddy the monster got me!" 

Tony chuckled and 'rescued' her from Sam's grasp. "Ah! Now daddy's the hero isn't he!" 

Bucky 'gently' kicked Tony in the balls. Tony groaned, lowering Y/N to the ground to cover his private parts. Y/N didn't notice, as Steve held his arms out, getting down on one knee and said, ""The princess needs to come home to the castle now." 

"My prince!" Y/N squealed, throwing herself into Steve's arms and laughing as he picked her up and then carried her off to bed. 

"Ow, what was that for?" Tony complained, now that Y/N was out of earshot. 

Bucky chuckled, "I think you should be more worried about your daughter calling Steve her prince." 

Tony snorted, "No, I think I should be more worried about giving her siblings in the future." 

The others roared with laughter. 

"Read me a bedtime story?" Y/N asked Steve happily. 

Steve smiled, going over to her bookcase and pulling out a huge book that contained every fairy tale in the world. It was heavy and thick, with old parchment and old hand drawn illustrations. They were also the original fairy tales too, so not the new ones that had been re-written. 

"Which one do you want to hear tonight?" Steve asked, flipping open the book carefully. Him, Sam, Clint, and Rhodey had taken turns reading every single story in here to her. 

"Um, the one about Little Red Riding Hood!" She said happily, wrapping her arms around a teddy bear that Wanda had given her for Christmas. 

"Okay." Steve said softly, opened up the page, and read until she fell asleep.