#today was the worst because fil waited until I was too tired to go along to unleash his fat shaming

[foldingfittedsheets]

This trip is truly terrible in every way except getting to spend time with my betrothed.

[prettytoxicrevolver]

The Past | Zach Herron

Requested? Yup! Hope you like it :)

Warnings? Death, therapy, anxiety, crying, it’s a sad one friends

Word Count: 1,979

“I’m sorry but there’s nothing else we could do.” The words ring in your ears as the worst news of your life settles over you. You watch as your dad asks a million questions but it’s blocked out by the ringing in your ears. 

Your mom couldn’t be gone. She couldn’t have been. She was supposed to go in for a quick back surgery. She was supposed to come out stronger and you were gonna get your old mom back. The one who could do amusement parks for hours and stand in line with you to concerts. 

Your best friend and the one who raised you. She was supposed to come back and it didn’t make any sense that she wasn’t going to. You went through every stage of loss in about five seconds before going right back to being numb. 

Everything happens in slow motion but also all at once. After your dad has finished asking all the questions he needs to, the doctor leaves and your left in the waiting room again. You hear your dad tell you that the doctor was going to come out with her remaining things and then you could go but it all sounds like static in your ears. 

The drive home was only ten minutes but it was dead silent. It didn’t change when you got home or the next few days. You and your dad floated around each other like ghosts, only saying a few words to each other at a time. 

The funeral is when it hits you the hardest. Your father asked you to sing for her because that’s what she always wanted. It took all of your willpower not to start bawling in the middle of her favorite song but you somehow made it through. You listened to people tell you stories about your mom and you smile but inside you were sobbing. 

You didn’t break down until you got home. You shut the front door behind you and fall to your knees crying your eyes out. Your dad picked you up and helped you over to the couch and the two of you sat in silence for the longest time. 

“She loved you so much.” He said eventually. “She was so sad whenever you’d have to go back to school because she couldn’t see you as much.” 

“It’s only gonna get harder.” You said through thick tears. 

“But it will always get better.” He reminds you. 

Both of you ended up being right. It got worse for the both of you as time went on. But it eventually did get better too. After a few months and nothing getting better you decided to go to therapy. Since your mom’s death was pretty sudden it was taking longer to accept it. 

You had also suffered from anxiety your entire life and found yourself riddled with panic attacks whenever you tried to talk about it. It was probably the hardest time of your life. So, when your dad suggested therapy to help you cope, you decided to give it a shot. 

“How are you doing today?” Your best friend asks. She was the only one who really knew what was going on with you and helped you through the worst days. 

“Better.” You say before taking a sip of your tea. “I’m seeing a lot of her today but it’s all good memories.” 

“I’m glad. You deserve all good days.” 

Just as you’re about to ask her how she’s doing, you’re interrupted by two boys walking up to the table. The blonde one stops in front of your best friend and her face lights up at the sight of him. 

“Corbyn!!” She exclaims before standing and giving the unknown boy a hug. 

“Hey! What are you doing on this side of town?”

“Oh (y/n) lives around here.” She says gesturing to you. You offer a half hearted wave and Corbyn smiles at you.

“I’m Corbyn and this is my friend Zach.” He says finally introducing you to the other boy still standing next to your table. 

As cheesy as it was, when his eyes landed on you it was like the world slowed down. Your eyes connect in slow motion and you’re instantly entranced by his earthly colored ones. Your breath had been sucked out of you and it felt like you were floating. 

“Hi.” You finally say and you giggle when Zach opens and closes his mouth trying to say something. 

If soulmates were a thing, Zach was almost certain he just met his. He was also in the middle of making a fool of himself in front of her too. She was breathtaking in the most unconventional way. In the way that Zach would never get tired of looking at her. 

“Hey.” He responds and instantly wants to smack a hand on his face. That’s all he could say?

“I’m gonna go grab another drink.” Your best friend says upon seeing you and Zach fall in love right before her eyes. 

“I’ll come with.” Corbyn offers and the two head off, leaving you alone with the younger boy. 

“Can I sit?” He asks and you nod your head, still not being able to find your voice completely. “So, you live around here?” He starts. 

The two of you dive into the normal beginning of a friendship conversation, where you live, where you’re from, how old you were etc. As you start to hit it off you remember that you’re here with your best friend and you haven’t seen her in a minute. 

“Have you seen Corbyn and (y/bff/n)?” You ask Zach and the two of you search the coffee shop.

“They must have left.” He says turning back to you and shrugging his shoulders. 

“She was my ride.” You sigh. 

“I can drive you home.” 

After talking a little bit longer, you two throw out your remaining cups and head out. Zach leads you towards an all black jeep and when you get there he opens the door for you. You hop up into the car and he shuts the door before running around to his side.

The ride is mostly silent except for the soft sounds of music playing and you telling Zach how to get to your house. When he pulls up, you look at the empty house and sigh. 

Just as you’re about to pull open the door, Zach speaks. 

“Do you maybe uh possibly wanna hangout sometime?” He asks nervously and his smile shoots straight to your heart. 

“Yeah that’d be fun.” You respond. He sighs in relief and you offer a tiny smile. The two of you swap phone numbers before finally heading inside. 

It took another week for you to actually hangout with Zach alone though. You were mad that you were holding yourself back because just from the texts he sent you already liked him. However, you hadn’t let many people in since your mom passed which is something you and your therapist were working on. 

So, as sad as it was, you weren’t only excited to hangout with Zach, you were also excited to tell your therapist how much you branched out. He ended up picking you up at 4 and you headed to the closest movie theater for a quick dinner at chick fil a before the movie. 

Throughout the night, you and Zach had learned more and more about each other. For once, you felt truly happy and you forgot about the trillion thoughts that always seemed to be running through your brain. 

When you got to the movies, the two of you had decided on the new annabelle movie. Normally, you hated horror movies but Zach begged you to see it and you found out quickly that it’s hard to say no to that face. 

Throughout the movie you find yourself curling towards Zach and he smiles down at you before lifting the armrest and gesturing for you to come towards him. He wraps you up in his arms and your heart settles instantly. 

The rest of the date goes extremely well and by the time Zach pulls up to your house you wish he didn’t have to go home. However, you two plan to hangout again tomorrow and end the night with the best kiss of your life. 

After that night, and many more nights after that, you and Zach fell quickly for each other. You also became super close with all of his bandmates especially Daniel. 

However, you still hadn’t told Zach about your mom. Every time he mentioned her or brought up family, you froze. You gave him vague details and begged to move on. The other issue was that he didn’t know about your therapy. While you weren’t exactly ashamed of going to therapy for help, you were nervous for Zach’s reaction. 

“Shoot. I have to go.” You say before standing to grab your stuff that was randomly placed around Zach’s room. 

“Where?” He asks and you falter for a second before grabbing your keys from his desk.

“I have to help my dad out with something. See you tomorrow?” Before he can respond you pecked his lips quickly and then turn to rush out the door. 

Daniel walks in a few minutes later to Zach with a confused look appearing across his features. He tilts his head at the younger boy, noticing his girlfriend’s absence and the expression couldn’t be good. 

“Hey man.” He greets the brunette. “Where’s (y/n)?” 

“She dipped. Had to help her dad with something.” 

“That’s all?” Daniel asks knowing there was definitely something wrong with Zach. 

“I don't know man. She’s always leaving at this time, every Tuesday night. It seems kinda weird.” He says shrugging his shoulders. 

“You see her tomorrow right? Tell her how you feel. It can’t hurt.” 

The next day, Zach invites you over for brunch, your favorite type of food. You got to wake up late and eat breakfast? It truly was heaven. You headed over there around 10 and headed straight into the house. 

You walk in to find Zach in the kitchen, pouring juice into glasses and setting them down next to your plate of food. He offers you a sweet smile before leading you over to the table and pulling out a chair for you. 

The two of you begin to eat and make some small talk about the upcoming week and any future plans you have together. Throughout breakfast, you notice that Zach seemed a bit off and just as he’s about to get up and wash the dishes you stop him.

“What’s up?” He halts his actions and pulls a chair up to sit in front of you. 

“Where do you go every Tuesday night?” 

The question takes you by surprise but it makes sense that he would ask. Zach was smart and pretty observational so it’s understandable that he was wondering where you went. You also knew it was time to tell him. 

“Therapy.” You respond and he cocks his head to the side in confusion. “My mom passed away about a year ago. It was sudden and I didn’t know how to deal with it. Along with my anxiety it got pretty bad.” 

“(y/n) I’m so sorry I didn’t know.” 

“It’s okay. I’m doing better, I can talk about her without crying which is a step forward.” You take his hand in yours and carefully run the tips of your fingers over his decorated rings. “I have you to thank. You’ve helped me a lot.” 

“I have?” He asks and you nod. 

“You were my light at the end of the tunnel.” His face breaks out in the smile that had your heart since day one. He leans forward and connects your lips, while placing a hand on your leg and giving it a light squeeze. 

“And you’re mine.”