#today is rather basic but oh well this one planned itself

[lovethytendytenderly]

Somebody Told Me by The Killers // an edit a day til penguins hockey, a countdown (day 27)

x

[sophie-hatter-jenkins]

Part 3: Blood Traitor

A March 2025 Hinny Microfic for @ginnystrophyhusband using Prompt 18

841 words (back on brand today!)

All the March prompts that I write will be set in the same universe as, and form a prequel to, this fic. Hopefully they'll all stand alone, but they'll also form a little story of their own, which is why they're numbered.

Fair warning - it's going to be fluffy!

Read them all from the beginning on AO3

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It’s a bit of a shock for Bill Weasley to learn that his baby sister intends to move in with her boyfriend. 

She’s not even nineteen yet. Barely out of Hogwarts, clutching a respectable set of NEWTS and with the ink still wet on her contract with the Holyhead Harpies (another thing that Bill can’t quite get his head around, quite frankly). None of it seems… possible? Right? It just isn’t sitting well with him. Ginny’s too young. Too precious. Too everything. 

The fact that his own wife was only a year older when they got engaged is neither here nor there, of course. 

Neither is the fact that he’s known Harry Potter for years—not just the legend but the boy himself. He seems a good sort, even without the whole ‘saving the world’ business. 

But still; it’s the principle of the thing.

At least Harry’s had the good sense to ask for Bill’s help with the wards on the house. Never mind being one of Gringotts top curse-breakers, you don’t survive a war when you’re part of the biggest family of blood traitors out there without being bloody good at protective enchantments. Bill prides himself on it.

He’s pleased that Harry takes it seriously, but maybe that isn’t a surprise, after everything he’s been through. Bill’s only too happy to meet him at the new cottage to lend his expertise to the endeavour, because it means a bit of time alone with him; time to have a little chat, one-on-one.

He’s got this whole speech planned. You know the sort of thing; the one where he explains just how much his baby sister means to him. How special she is. Exactly what he’d do to anyone that hurts her. Bill can be pretty intimidating when he wants to, he knows this. It’s a vital skill when you’re dealing with goblins day in, day out. He’s sure he can impress his point on Harry.

The first thing he notices is the cottage itself. It’s actually lovely, solidly built, facing out to the grassy sand dunes and the beach beyond. It’s an unusual choice for a first home for someone Harry’s age, he thinks; Bill had expected him to want to stay amongst the bright lights and diversions of the big city. 

He remarks as much to Harry when they meet just outside the gate, once they’ve exchanged greetings, but Harry just shakes his head.

“Nah. Ginny’s happiest in the countryside, so it’s a no-brainer really. London’s great, but I’m there every day for work, and I can visit when I want. Plus, I’d rather have a bit of peace and quiet, so it suits both of us, I think.”

Bill nods, sagely. “Is there much to do inside?”

Harry pulls a face. “Yeah, quite a lot. I’m going to move in next weekend, even though I’ll basically be camping here, but it means I’ll have more time to get the work done. I want it to be perfect before Ginny moves in.”

Satisfied, Bill turns his attention to the wards that are already in place. He’s impressed; Harry’s actually done a pretty decent job with them, they’re far more complex, and more comprehensive, than anything he’d expected. Certainly nothing that would be covered at school.

“This is good work,” he comments, though he’s puzzled. “I didn’t think they covered protective enchantments in first year Auror training.”

“Oh, no. They don’t,” Harry explains. “We used some of them to hide our tent while we were on the run. The rest I researched in the Ministry library.”

Bill hadn’t been expecting that. “You taught yourself how to do all this?” he asks, wondering if he’s misunderstood. It’s a huge amount of work, and would have taken a lot of time and perseverance. 

Harry looks a bit sheepish. “Hermione helped me practice, but it had to be done.” He sighs. “The fact is that I’ll always have a target on my back, one way or another. That’s just something I have to live with. But I won’t put Ginny in the firing line. If there’s anything I can do, anything at all, to keep her safe, then I’m going to do it.” 

There’s a fire in his eyes as he says it, a determination and an honesty, and all of a sudden, Bill wonders what on earth he was worried about. It couldn’t be clearer just how vital Ginny is to Harry, that she’s his first and most important consideration, and really, what more could any big brother want? 

His carefully crafted speech now seems more than a bit superfluous, ridiculous, even. So, just like that, he lets it go, melting away to the breeze off the Atlantic.

Instead, he turns to Harry with a smile. “Well, there isn’t that much more I’d recommend adding, but there are one or two extras that I think would be useful. You can help me cast them, if you like.”

“Great!” Harry’s expression is earnest. “I’d really like that.”

“Me too,” says Bill. And he means it.

[frostiwars]

any random headcanons you want to share? could be from painful to funny and that sort.

you can be as extensive as you want, i just really like to see peoples hcs

oh boy, i’ve got so many of these but to keep it short i’ll just do one headcanon for the main four and the first major villain, nightmare

that doesn't sound like a lot, but trust me, i ended up packing a lot into these, so they're going under the cut

kirby - it’s been hinted at every now and then in the story, and will continue to be, but the one thing that puts dread into this kid’s heart more than anything, more than even death itself, is the fact that they are a voidborn.

maybe its the fact that, rather than being taught as such from a young age, they were forced to confront it face to face under extremely harrowing circumstances. but the fact of the matter is that, no matter how much they are the embodiment of pure, compassionate, unyielding love… they were cut from the same cloth as Zero. and more than that, they have the same level of drive and determination as Zero. they are diametrically opposed hate and love. and if Zero can persist infinitely like that, does that mean they have to as well? do they have to stay in this world forever, never ever giving up, even after everyone else they love (the thing they were born for) is gone… because if they don’t, then hatred will win? will they turn into some disgusting creature, at least physically, after straining themself for so many years?

how strong are they, really? how much more are they than their friends? they want to be LIKE their friends. they don’t want to be anything more than loved and to love. but that fulfills it in and of itself

they’ve been sticking by gooey’s side a lot more ever since star allies. maybe he’s the only one that really gets it

…

bandee - as we know, this bandee is the same one that entered our lives through kirby 64! i’ll go into his backstory a bit more in the cut scenes omake, but basically, after losing his only guardian, he had nothing else to stick around for, so he packed up his things and started wandering about the countryside in search of a new home. he did make a quick stop to try out a strength tournament in order to earn some prize money to keep him going, and he surprised everyone, including himself, with his own strength

waddle dees are a lot stronger than people give them credit for. especially this one. with an uncharacteristic determination uncommon to his species, he’s able to teach himself all sorts of things that seem impossible, like flying with his core! most waddle dees have pretty weak magical cores, but he was so inspired by dedede that he trained himself up enough to be where he is today. not just flight, but imbuing his spear with conductive magical energy. (tipping it with his rewarding chunk of the Great Crystal helped though)

…

meta knight - meta is actually a voidborn incarnated with an incredibly low key emotion… melancholy. he’s not some grand representation of someone’s most base, strongest feelings. he’s quiet, subdued. almost a little tragic. he doesn’t know this, at least not for a very very long time. and why would he? he seems just as powerful as any other voidborn

but voidborns are very long lived creatures. not for any natural biological or mystical reason. they often just have a tendency to push themselves beyond their destined lives. the stronger and more base their emotion, the more their will to live continues. it’s why zero is so old. HOW.

but what of those calmer emotions? what of calm, ennui, nostalgia, dislike, regret, exhaustion, discomfort, aching, warmth, dreaminess?

they’ll live normal lives. they’ll be content with their lifespan. meta will live his life as he is meant to, with the people he is meant to, and leave nobody behind. unlike someone else.

…

dedede - i don’t want to expound too much on his backstory because i have oh so many plans for it, but it’s not that pretty, i’ll say that. in the meantime, let’s discuss dreamland royalty as a whole!

the dreamland country was actually founded by voidborns many eons ago, and their traditions were passed down quite perfectly until its abrupt dissolution a decade and a half ago. (side note, voidborn culture is heavily japanese inspired and the voidborn tongue straight up is japanese. this is a joke on how void is a creator deity and the series is made by japanese people. that’s why dedede’s dress is so overtly traditional.)

but why is he wearing it wrong? why doesn’t he seem to know any of the proper dreamland royalty traditions and rituals and customs and lore? he was born into the royal family. he was there before its collapse. he rebuilt it himself because he thought he deserved to still wear that crown. so what gives? what, did someone just forget to teach him anything? did they just… neglect to do so?

how annoying. even meta knight doesn’t know enough about the customs. it’s not like he was raised in that environment either. i guess they’ll just have to come up with something on their own.

…

nightmare - what are you, some kinda wizard or something?? how old are you like 3000?

oh you’re like 50. well that’s lame. when did you start your silly little wizard studies? oh. like 30 years before any of the main characters were born. i mean i guess that’s enough time to become powerful if you try hard enough i was just expecting a bit more. are you even a god? no, you’re just a wizard. are you a… human? no, you’re just those things that are sorta human but not really like the mage sisters. cool. i guess that explains why you’re so good at magic. humans don’t actually have magical cores.

hey how many times did you try to take over pop star? like 10 times until you got beat by kirby permanently? why are you so bad at your job. why do you care about this particular planet so much. i mean yeah, dream fountain, but that theming only gets you so far.

ohhhhhh elemental destiny i geeeeet it. cuz like the mage trio had the thing with their elements and yours is- ooooooohhhhhhhh okay, cuz your species are humanoid beings made of clay that become infused with your element and then- ohhhhhhhhhh okay

still doesn’t excuse the war crimes. like, c’mon, you killed meta’s family and tore his face up AND brought down the dreamland royal family AND broke the star rod AND probably caused a bunch of other off screen incidents. you coulda probably just like… sat on the moon and gave people occasional bad dreams like in my little pony

[definitelynotshouting]

Hello again! Im so sorry to hear you feeling well when i sent in my ask the other day :( hoping that the life series drop tmrw will provide a much needed distraction for whatever you need it to :)

-☀️

"I know the, um, this morning didn't go… very well… but… if I could—""

"Good, he thinks, but it's a rote sentiment, not half so vicious as it had been only hours earlier."

- oh??? 👀 i am looking

- Im assuming this is the meeting they had about taking grian back to hermitcraft (and the revelation that grian feeds on emotions to survive)?? Very curious

- Now that metaphor about the childhood coat being stained is a lot more painful

-☀️

"even stolen energy can't make up for that."

"everything he'd never had the first time he— well, when Grian, the real Grian— had died."

- "stolen energy" omg i am biting ankles over this.

- And the "real Grian" thing. Yeah

- This is one of those moments where grian's whole situation is so much more potent and vivid. Imagining living as myself, but knowing im occupying someone elses body, and having my very lifeforce sustained by others?? Its not hard to understand why grian internalises and hates himself for being "a parasite". Idk thats probably very obvious to everyone else but this is the first time ive really thought about all of what that entails

-☀️

"Starving hands reach out from the depths of his mind to pull him back, stumbling, under that dark waterline."

- Love how the word "starving" implies that G falling asleep is more of a survival mechanism forcing him under so that his body can feed rather than only exhaustion

-☀️

"he's pressed a knife to every promise he's ever made since the day he emerged,"

- shaking you

-☀️

"His existence lies in the shadows of these distorted fractures, jagged hopes and dented dreams, forever fated to cut his hands on the fragments."

- AHHHHJSLDHSJSVSN

- Man 🧍

- Dont have any words. Just tears.

AAAAAAAAAA SUN ANON I ALWAYS LOVE SEEING YOU IN MY INBOX!!!! Gods im so glad these lines resonated with and interested you, they were a ton of fun to write

I have a brain today so i can actually expand on some of the things youve pointed out instead of just aiming heart eyes at you for the compliments fjsndjsjejke so for the first point, yes!!! Scar and Xisuma returned to the others post chap 6 and were like "Well that sucked!! Wow!!!!" I wouldnt say theyve given all the information to everybody, because they themselves aren't exactly ready to discuss that beyond the immediately required basics, but everyone else was given the gist: convo went badly, Grian is being taken back to Hermitcraft on Scar and Xisuma's insistence. Both Scar and Xisuma feel fucking horrible for how that conversation went down-- nobody had a good time there. So while the plan is to eventually get everyone up to speed, they're sorta taking this time to be miserable about what was essentially a fight that ended in stripping Grian of his autonomy

There's also a little cross-communication happening here in the background, btw: Scar and Xisuma have a pretty big picture now, but Tango, Mumbo, and Pearl have been fed that false info abt the potions being potentially useful. So, yknow :) just smth to keep in mind there haha

Your point about how it almost feels like Grian falling asleep is a survival mechanism is spot on the money. It's essentially him falling into a state of low power mode, where everything but his most basic of functions is shut down for a brief time in favour of preserving energy-- i would honestly consider it more equivalent to a coma than actual sleep. Hence Tango's concern, and subsequent relief when Grian woke up; the entire time he was unconscious, he was fully unresponsive. So, yknow. Real nerve-wracking to see, especially after that prior full week of unresponsiveness as his body struggled to maintain itself.

Tango's role here is indeed deliberate, both on a watsonian and doylist level!! The reason however is the exact same for both: Tango is a little more removed, personally, from this situation. Grian was-- and is-- his friend, ofc, but he's not as close to whats happening. Meanwhile, Xisuma is in 24/7 server babysitting mode, Pearl is not fit to be a caretaker, and Scar and Mumbo were tearing themselves apart by trying to sit and look after him. So Tango got assigned caretaker duties 😂😂😂😂 it was an effective way to divvy up tasks and keep everybody busy, and somewhat hilariously, so far Tango is the only person Grian isnt supremely upset with for one reason or another. And thats why he's continued to stay in caretaker mode lol he is truly just. The only guy who can rn

I also just sorta think of him as a surprisingly emotionally savvy fixer-type, in terms of personality. Like. I think he just gets what people set down in front of him, yknow? Although hell if he knows what to do with it once he's got em. He fumbles a lot, sure, and he defaults to fix-it mode, but he is getting the message when Grian essentially says "i dont wanna talk anymore" without actually saying it

As for Grian and his headspace, rn, theres definitely a complexity at work here where he wants to die and is very genuine in that, but he IS also grateful he's seeing his friends. He cant deny that. As painful as it is, he still loves them very much, and ultimately he's trying to do this for their own good as much as for his own sense of punishment and relief. I think like... now that he's really creeping up on what he has planned, and the pieces are suddenly becoming a reality, theres a bit of dissonance he's fighting against to stay on course. He wants his friends happy; he also wants to die. He's so overwhelmingly tired; he is, as much as he feels he doesnt deserve it, glad to have his friends close. That sort of hopelessness mixed with a warped sense of comfort that he got to see and interact with them one last time. If that makes any sense. Its a bit of complexity i wanted to make sure i added in, because people are so rarely fully decided on any course of action they choose to take, without even a single flicker of doubt (and especially one so final as this). Im glad youve picked up on that, and that you appreciate what i was trying to set down with it!!! :D

This was such a lovely message, as always-- you are very sweet, sun anon, and i appreciate you lots :] i hope you're having an excellent day!!!

[gren-arlio]

As my laptop dies, the quest for knowledge doesn't. Welcome to Episode 7 of (Waku) Puyo Extras. (Feat. A bit about a trope.)

(At what point do we begin to feel bad for Schezo?)

Hey everyone, it's the dude who translates a niche video game for a living. As my laptop seizes to exist, my phone survives, and it's thankfully enough to do Waku Puyo Extras, as well as doing some stuff to work under Puyo Preservation as a proofreader.

As writing this, (September 25th-30), my laptop cannot run most things anymore, including what I use for translations, but I'm not the one to leave people in the dust. So rather, I decided to work on Extras because hey, I like writing these and people kinda enjoy these well.

I thought this time, with my inconsistent as all hell schedule, speak about these today:

Honey Bee. Weird pick, I know, but it could've been worse, and at least she's super hard carried by the Waku Puyo Manga. Plus, her origin is pretty interesting.

Something a little goofy. Schezo's "love life", or really, the people who chase[d] him around during the run of Puyo and Madou. That, and the trend itself in the games, since it goes even to Puyo Puyo Tetris 2.

As per the (Kinda) Dead Laptop Arc I'm going through, there are no videos for a good while.

And before we begin, I want to ask y'all a question:

Both will be covered but for a TLDR for people who dunno:

Serilly's Happy Birthday is a sorta Princess-Maker (Where you're basically raising a young girl, but in this case it's Serilly) game where you help plan Serilly's birthday on a week-to-week basis and invite people for her birthday. Gameplay itself I dont fully know myself, but I DO know that there are several endings to this game depending on who you decide to speak to and befriend.

Arle's Travel Log is a text-adventure game where Arle and Satan fight over Carbuncle and get blasted back in time, and Arle and Carbuncle trying to get past to the present. Game itself has some actual Madou Monogatari-like exploration, a point and click battle system, and features not only the Madou cast, but some actual historical figures and JUMP HERO, another series made by COMPILE.

This poll will last about a week. With this, I really hope you enjoy.

-----

So, What're Honey Bee's Origins?

Honey Bee's origin is kinda weird, similar to Kikimora. She first appears in a Disc System Daimadou Senryaku Monogatari, a turn based strategy game, as one of the "Units" Arle and her enemies can use.

These are the rivals Arle can face, ranging from Easy on top, Moderate in middle, and Difficult on the bottom. Yeah idk how Witch or Zoh got into the Difficult status. Oh, and the tile on the very bottom right? That's where the final boss is...which is Rulue.

And on the bottom screenshot, you can see Archan and Kodomo as well, who also made their grand appearance here.

Now you couldn't exactly pay me to tell you how the gameplay really works, but I do know that this game got a balance patch in form of another game. We getting the Street Fighter treatment for these. I'm thankful to even find gameplay, as another Disc Station game, Madou Sugoroku, I legit can't find any footage for.

...Maybe the next Extras will be about these game, I dunno.

-----

So Honey Bee herself had a kinda interesting origin, even though she was sorta a blank slate along with the rest who joined her. SUN didn't exactly do much better.

She first appears in Arle's route and comes down trying to stab Arle with her syringe. Arle dodges and says that what Bee just did was dangerous, but Bee chases her with the syringe. And on Schezo's route, she actually stabs Schezo, but his head must be made of steel because he thinks it's just his imagination and walks away.

(The moment of the attack, 1996, Circa)

So not the best, but she got something, right?

Well. Waku Puyo blows everything out the water...in the manga.

BECAUSE HONEY BEE IS SO ANNOYING AS AN ENEMY.

She comes in and does a few things. Either poison you, lower your attack, or makes you sleep. When she's about at 1/3 of her HP, she retreats very quickly, which is more annoying than it sounds. She sounds evil in this game, man. So much so that my friend @kirstenonic05 made a nice little video about her experiences.

Here.

(Song used is Lying Coldy in Ace Attorney: Miles Edgeworth Investigations.)

Besides bosses, from my pals experiences, Honey Bee holds the distinct honor of being the most annoying enemy to fight.

So how does the Manga carry her?

It HEAVILY carries her, 90% of her personality as a whole is there to be honest.

We meet her in the first volume, and she says her goal quite clearly: To beat Schezo, even though she doesn't even know why she has to herself. Even Schezo's confused as hell.

However, unlike Puyo SUN, she doesn't just attack the man outta nowhere. She gets one ACTUAL look at Schezo's face, and is flabbergasted by how pretty he is. (In this style of art? He's alright for the most part)

After some shenanigans going around, what with Bee stabbing him and her getting smacked around because she's barely the size of Schezo's neck and head, decides that she's not gonna kill him, and rather join him for whatever cause he has because...Love I guess. Damn, love really does make people do crazy shit.

She then (To the dismay of Schezo) follows him around for a majority of the adventure, even helping him with fights occasionally, and being absolutely pissed when Incubus appears and tries to seduce Schezo.

I should mention here that Bee thinks that she and Schezo are husband and wife. Or at least "together". That's how many on Schezo?

Now, if you've seen the Serilly Extras post, you know that she was also there with Schezo, but at the start, rather than try to help Serilly, who was manipulated by Satan to be there because he said he was her friend, try to attack her several times to know where the Orb was...only for Schezo to smack her aside several times.

Thankfully, she got the memo and decided to help Serilly out, only to get upset when Serilly saves Schezo and he carries her bridal style, and also when Schezo says he'll visit again if he feels like it.

After Schezo gets possessed by Incubus (I'm not saying seduced. He full on got possessed,) Bee goes to Momomo, who then goes to Serilly for help and...yeah the manga ended there.

So yeah, that's Bee's importance in the manga. Quite a large one, but to Schezo, she's just another annoying admirer/person who loves him.

(If you came for the analysis, this ends here. Thanks for reading up to here, and enjoy my goofy ramble about a trope.)

-----

Speaking of Annoying Admirers/"Lovers":

Poor Schezo. Man's trying to live his life and just gets chased around by some of the oddest people out there, or in some cases, stuck with them. This has obviously not been the case for Modern Puyo, but back then? Oh boy. Lets cover that.

Let's start with the one from the manga itself, the one y'all JUST saw:

Honey Bee:

Frankly, Schezo got it rough if a Bee thinks they're married, when in-game, she's easily the most infuriating enemy out there excluding bosses. She frankly loves the dude, much to Schezo's anger. She sees other girls talking to him or whenever Incubus decides to be wacky as cheating, and gets really upset at that.

And that's not even including Serilly, where she tried to attack her over it...and also the orb but shhh, forget that. We forget them here quite often.

-----

Incubus

You may be wondering, "What does he do again?" and I'm glad you asked. Man spends the entire time chasing around Schezo trying to "Seduce" him and such, much to Honey Bee's dismay and chargin.

Though like any villain, he does have a reason. Y'see, the big thing about Waku Puyo is these orbs, the big shiny things that are important. Incubus wants those orbs, and when Schezo gets one from Serilly, he does possess Schezo for it. Love it or not, the guy had a fairly decent plan. I have to unfortunately respect it. Poor Bee, though.

(Yeah, I forgot this happened, ngl.)

-----

Succubus:

Another one is Succubus. Now with this one, this is more due to things like, oh idk,

She's a damn Succubus. It's her job.

Incubus I was a little confused about, but in general, it made sense, Succubus is just doing what she usually does. We all know what she did to Schezo in Madou Saturn, but in Waku Waku Puyo Puyo Dungeon, she does appear in all routes in Battle Castle as well as in Schezo's route.

In both her boss fights, she tries her absolute best to make Schezo her servant...to basically little avail, because he was tempted at first. (Also, in Arle's route, she makes an exception for her because she only goes for "Good-looking men," but Arle can be excluded.)

-----

Witch:

If you've followed me at any point in time or casually read whatever she does in Madou, you know as well as I do that Witch chases this guy around. A lot. She could be considered the OG Schezo Chaser. (God I'm laughing at that name during typing)

They began to get associated in Tower of the Magician, and there, they're going their own routes but they team up sometimes for puzzles and the sort. Nothing bad. Then it happens again in SUN, with the now infamous "I want you," to Schezo, before clarifying its his robe she wants. I feel like this one was a genuine misunderstanding.

Then out of fucking nowhere, she dials it up to 11 in 1998 with both Waku Waku Puyo Puyo Dungeon AND Madou Saturn. Least in Saturn, she was stupid curious about this "Perverted man" and asked to touch him, and that's about it. In Waku Puyo, she just...chases him the entire time for his clothes, and keeps saying how cool he and the robe are. IK I mention this often but it's relevant to this for once. Plus, Waku Puyo is like 50% of my brand.

Then she does the unthinkable and continued it in PPT2...yes I know Marle possessed her but still. It's funny. And to quickly mention 20th, she does do her iconic SUN line again, so Wahoo.

And special shout out to when she told everyone about the meaning of Schezo's name during that beauty contest. Gotta respect that she knows the lore.

(I don't think any of us expected this. But it's hilarious. Unfortunately I will not be submitting to you.)

----

About this "Lover chases their crush"/Chasers Trope;

They're pretty common in Puyo as a whole. Rulue with Satan, Satan with Arle, Schezo with Arle for straight power, Witch with Schezo, Draco with beauty, Strange Klug with trying to get out that fucking book, list goes on.

I won't deny, it's a little outplayed, and Rulue specifically got it the roughest. Like 60% of her is just about Satan, and I just find that wild, least in modern Puyo. I think Puyo Puyo Tetris 2 did it wonderfully, as Rulue still very much loves Satan, but it's not her entire character.

Maybe Puyo Tetris 2 is just really well written, I dunno.

Overall...I'm fine with this trope. If done well it can be very funny, just hope to God it's the main thing about the character.

And I think with that statement, that'll be all for this week. Hope you enjoyed this, and be sure to vote on the poll too.

Adios.

[dxncingwithastrxnger]

EVERYTHING TRISLANCE RN

OKAY THIS IS GONNA BE A LONG ASS POST CAUSE IMMA GIVE YOU SNEAK PEEKS OF EACH ONE THAT HAS STUFF WRITTEN ALREADY, TOO

First one: [pretty, pretty please]

[He hears a slight creak of the floor and whips around, his heterochromatic eyes meeting bright red ones and he instantly relaxes, sagging in on himself. In the presence of the other boy, he felt ashamed of himself. If Lance had a demon form, he would never lose control the way that I do, Tristan thought to himself glumly as he dropped his eyes down to the floor, gritting his teeth.

"What is with you today?" Lance speaks up sternly. Tristan continues his inspection of the floor, but he hears the slight tunk as Lance closes the door to his bed chambers and the quiet wisps of fabric brushing together as he makes his way towards him.

"I don't know what you're talking about." Tristan argues weakly, both of them knowing it's a complete lie. Lance reaches for his hand and Tristan flinches away from him. I don't deserve his touch. He should be disgusted by me, just like everyone else.

Lance hesitates then, Tristan can tell. His body goes still, his breath hitches, and he swallows. Tristan still isn't looking at him, but his other senses have learned to pick up on his every move and action just as well as his eyesight by this point. He knows what's coming. He's about to be scolded for his pathetic slip-up. This is the first time they've managed to actually talk right after a loss of his control, so Lance has never gotten to truly lecture him about it before, but Tristan knows that he wants to. He's made that quite clear through snippy comments and stern remarks thrown about in conversation between them whenever the topic allows. Tristan is certain that he knows exactly what Lance is going to say to him, so he's very surprised by the question he hears spoken softly into the room.

"...Are you afraid of me?" Lance asks Tristan. His voice is wobbly and quiet, as if the question itself is enough to make him completely crumble into tiny pieces. Tristan's head shoots up immediately upon processing what Lance was asking him. He thinks I'm afraid of him? Seriously?]

So, about this one!!! Basically Tris has one of his many mental breakdowns and Lance shows up and ends up learning just how badly Tristan sees himself while Tris finds out about some of Lance's own insecurities and it's all a bunch of angst that eventually ends with some fluff. I only plan for it to be like a chapter or two, tbh, just a short lil thing.

Second one: [and all we are is skin and bone, trained to get along]

Synopsis: It's your usual trope. Royalty meets commoner and love blossoms between the two. But these boys are a bit different. Not only are they completely different classes, they're different races, too. In this version of Britannia, the Fairy clan doesn't take too kindly to the Goddess Clan and vice versa. But the Prince of Liones has such mesmerizing eyes and that bread thief's sly grin is enough to leave anyone it's aimed at breathless.

[Tristan hurries down the hall and to his room, having only a limited amount of time to get there before the guards come back and see the basket of food he carries with him. It's not like getting caught would be too big of a deal. But getting caught meant he would have to provide an explanation as to why he had the food with him in the first place, and that's what he would get in trouble for. 'Oh, well, you see, mother and father, the reason I was taking this rather large basket of food to my room with me is because I've decided to start giving that very handsome young commoner boy that you captured in the kitchens two weeks ago baskets of food every week so that he'll keep coming back to my balcony and calling me pretty.' Yes, that would certainly go over well. There are so many things wrong with that sentence that just speaking it out loud to anyone would gain him an immediate doctor visit or two.

He bites back a grin as he slips through the doors to his bed chambers quickly, allowing them to fall closed behind him. He sets the basket on his writing desk before walking over to his bed and flopping down on it, the grin finally breaking through despite him trying to prevent it from doing so.]

This little snippet is literally all I have written out for this fic so far, but I plan for this to have at least 6 chapters and I haven't finished planning it out yet, tbh, just that it's gonna be a pretty decent amount of story, lmao. But basically Ban, Elaine, and Lance live like a (mostly) normal family but are pretty poor and Ban tries to stay straight and out of trouble, but Lance doesn't have the same sentiment. HE decides it would be a great idea to try and steal some food directly from the King and Queen (Because Meliodas and Elizabeth don't know Ban or Elaine in this AU, ofc) and he gets caught and thrown behind bars for a few days. But then he gets released and on his way out, he spots Tris looking pretty in the gardens and Tris sees him as well and then there's ✨chemistry✨

But because of Elaine being a fairy, she's extremely distrustful of Elizabeth and Meliodas by association and Ban hates demons, so he hates Meliodas and it's all a whole thing. I plan to have King in the story, too, but I haven't figured out his part of the story yet, or most of the other characters for that matter, lmaoo

Third one: [we're only lost children]

AKAJAKA I'VE TOLD YOU ABOUT THIS ONE BEFORE

THIS IS THE ONE WHERE THEY DANCE

AND THEN THE TIMELINE IS SWITCHED

SO LANCE DISAPPEARS AT AGE 16 INSTEAD OF 10

AND THEN THERE'S A N G S T

But I'll still give you a lil bit of it so that you have plenty of food to eat up :DDD

[They’re so close now, their bodies almost entirely pressed together. Lancelot leans down and presses his forehead into Tristan’s. From their current position, their chests are pressed together and Tristan can feel Lance's heart beating as fast as his own. Lance brings his hand up from Tristan’s knee and instead presses it to his cheek instead, cradling his face tenderly. Tristan mimics the action with his free hand and the two of them stay just like that for a few long moments. Then, slowly, Lance stands back up, pulling Tristan with him, and they continue their dance. But this time, it's different.

Before, the heat and tension building between them was subtle. Now it was all around them, closing in and getting ready to consume them. Their chase continues, but it's faster. Who's the hunter? Who's the prey? Neither is quite sure yet, all they know is that they must catch the other. Tristan's glad to see that Lance is just as affected as he is. The blonde has wide pupils and it almost seems like he's panting. Tristan knows he's the same way. All he wants to do is pull his lover into a kiss, end this chase, but he doesn't want to give in just yet. The air around them is filled with fire and every step they take just adds another spark to the flame.

Lance can see it in Tristan's eyes. He's right on the verge of giving in, of letting Lance win. The competitive nature in him is filled with glee at the chance to win this unspoken game of theirs. He fills his eyes with all his want, all the desire he has for the boy in front of him, and lets a boyish grin grace his lips. And that's it, right there. He sees the moment Tristan gives in and he knows he's won, exactly as he planned to. He pushes Tristan out for one more spin and then pulls his prince right into him.

"Damn you." Tristan whispers against Lance's lips before pushing all the way against him, and the flames overtake them.

The kiss they share now is unlike any kiss that's been exchanged between them before. They've had plenty of makeout sessions, but none of them held as much heat as this one.]

Aksjslakas I forgot that I planned on putting smut in the first chapter 💀💀 Cause it's supposed to be all sweet and romantic and our two boys being all in love and being connected more than ever before AND THEN BOOM

Lance is gone right after for THREE WHOLE YEARS

Cause I'm evil and love making angst LMAO

So there you go!! I know there's a fourth one but I have literally nothing for it except the title, lmao. BUT I know that the title is a lyric from the song The Only Exception by Paramore, so maybe listening to the song while thinking of Trislance will bring whatever idea I had back 💀💀💀

[pomrania]

Okay, so I should write stuff about what I’m planning to do this month, for art. It’s not going to start today or tomorrow, but yeah.

First off, it’d be for mutuals and half-mutuals. “Half-mutual” is a term I came up with, because I didn’t know of any other term, and it just seemed to fit. It’s for when you follow my blog, and I follow your sideblog. (Or the other way around, but I don’t have sideblogs that people follow, so that wouldn’t apply to me.) I know there’s at least two different half-mutuals I have, one where I follow their cat blog and another where I follow their art blog; there may be more, even ones that are regularly active, but this is just off the top of my head.

I’m limiting it to mutuals and half-mutuals because I don’t think I could handle it unlimited; therefore, it logically follows that I think I CAN handle it with the given limitations. Which leads back into the perennial problem of people going “I don’t want to impose” or “I don’t want to give you extra work” or “I want other people to have a chance”. STOP WITH THAT.

Let’s take it in order. “I don’t want to impose.” If I’m asking you to give me something, and you give me the thing that I ask for, that is like, the exact opposite of “imposing”.

“I don’t want to give you extra work.” I’m not on salary. I’m not some minimum-wage employee getting paid the same amount regardless of how much I do or have to do. Heck, I’m not getting paid at ALL for this; it’s something I do because I WANT to do it. And if I feel like I can’t finish all of a thing in one day, you know what I do? I carry it over to the NEXT day.

“I want other people to have a chance.” This is actually a valid concern, but don’t worry, I have a system for dealing with that, and it’s worked very well in the past. Basically, you can only make a second (or third, fourth, etc) request once your first request has been done and posted; and that new request goes to the bottom of the list, like all new requests. I can explain it in more detail if needed -- either because you don’t get what I’m saying (totally possible) or because you don’t see how it solves the problem -- but it boils down to that the only way someone can monopolize stuff, is if nobody else makes a request.

If you keep following me, you’re prolly going to see the above stuff a LOT, as it keeps being a problem for every damn request-based art event I do. So like, just trust that I know what I’m doing, and I’m capable of making my own choices, and don’t try to make those choices for me.

Okay, rant over, what’s the other stuff I’ll need to talk about....

Subject matter. It’s “drawing pets as monsters”. Last year I got a lot of “vampire” requests, and I don’t know whether that’s because I put ‘vampire’ in the list of examples, or if people just really want to see their critters as vampires. I’d rather not, in general. Mostly because there’s only so many different ways to represent “vampire” and it can get boring after a while. I mean, I’m not OPPOSED to drawing critters as vampires, but I’d prefer that either a) it’s something you really want, as in “oh boy I can’t wait to see this critter as a vampire”, or b) you give me something more descriptive than just “vampire”; doesn’t have to be a vampire from a specific folklore or anything, “cute little vampire like you’d see on spoopy decorations” or “monstrous blood-sucker” would also work quite well for purposes.

Duration. Uhhh I have no idea; I think I’ll start with requests open for a week, and then see how that goes. And I’ll have to remember to put that in the post too; that it might be open for just a week, and it might end up as more than a week, I don’t know.

OH something else I need to make sure everyone knows, although I might not need to put it in the post itself. That once requests close, that does not mean that the EVENT closes; I’ll still be drawing requests that came in. This is something that people keep getting wrong and worrying about; is there a better way of phrasing it, that’ll be easily understood?

Also, my normal rules wrt the definition of “pet” will still apply; that is, a critter you have some type of connection to, past or present, and you can give me their name. The “name” thing is important because that’s what I do for file names, so without a name I can’t get past super-rough sketching (because I’m only going to put actual effort into a piece once I’ve saved it, which I can’t do without something to name the file, and I refuse to depart from my naming scheme).

[twilightmalachite]

Christmas Live - Prologue

Author: Akira

Characters: Yuzuru, Anzu

Translator: Mika Enstars

JP Proofer: 310mc

EN Proofer: ryuseipuka

"Hm, “meow ♪”? Is that your impression of a cat?"

[Read on my blog for the best viewing experience with Oi~ssu ♪]

Season: Winter

Location: Yumenosaki Corridors

Yuzuru: …Sigh. I’m sorry, could you please repeat yourself?

Oh, no, it’s not that I couldn’t hear you the first time. I don’t mean to guilt you, but could you please speak a little more clearly?

I’m here to prioritize assessing the situation correctly, rather than to criticize you. …What has happened, are you crying?

You’ll have to excuse me, I cannot take your feelings into consideration at this time.

I’m terribly sorry, but, please do tell me what led up to this. I’ll handle it from here on.

Hm. What an inconvenience; I thought you had assured me you would have that matter taken care of.

If that comes to a stop, then this entire thing will come to a standstill.

What trouble. Biting off more than you can chew only reveals your inadequacy.

You should prove your usefulness not with your words, but with your actions, and your results.

Yes. Do not worry, allow me to take care of it. You should give your face a quick rinse.

I’ll contact you again later, so… Alright, do excuse me.

… …

Yuzuru: …How vulgar.[1] Well, I can understand how he feels.

Oya, Anzu-san. It’s not in very good taste to eavesdrop, you know.

No, there isn’t any serious trouble. No need for the producer to go through the hassle of interfering.

You’re busy with your own business after all, are you not?

Fufu. It is indeed December, the end of the year.

Soon it will be Christmas… The academy has plans to hold the large-scale event we know as StarFes.

And as expected, the student council appears to be short on hands, and I have been requested to assist with preparations.

I do not wish to be so meddlesome…

However, the student council is one of the young master’s places to be. It is my duty as a butler to support him, as well.

Furthermore, the results I achieve will also affect the young master’s evaluation.

And so, I am doing the best to my ability. I am having quite the tough time, though….

It’s one issue after another, you see, and I’m extremely busy. I’d welcome even the help of a cat.[2]

Hm, “meow ♪”? Is that your impression of a cat?

You act quite unusually sometimes, don’t you, Anzu-san. Regardless, as I’ve said… I’m sure that you have your own work to complete.

So please, prioritize that.

I understand exactly how you feel. Labor is a blessing—No, it is life itself. It devastates me to have to take a break for the New Year holiday season.

Fufu. That being said, it is a season where you can easily fall sick… Please take care of yourself, Anzu-san.

I do not have the time for a long conversation now, so do excuse me.

Oh. I’m sorry, but please do not tug at the hem of my uniform. You resemble a lost child. What can I do for you?

Hm. So… It’s a rare occurrence, but you truly are free today, Anzu-san?

Nobody will give you any work, because they’re all concerned about you? Well, you have been working a lot, Anzu-san… It wouldn’t be good if you were to collapse from overexertion.

Make good use of everyone’s concern for you, and please rest. How about finding a hobby, or joining a club?

That is what I do on my days off, too.

I strengthen my mind with the archery club, and do careful and meticulous cleaning around the mansion I normally am not able to get to…

Do you have any hobbies, Anzu-san?

Hm. You still insist on some kind of work? “Please don’t reduce my hours, boss!”…? Fufu, that’s a very funny joke. ♪

As you wish. I just can’t say no when I’m pleaded to so lovingly like that.

Hm… May I ask you to do a bit of shopping for me, then?

An errand. Basically; there are some trivial things I need.

The quantity doesn’t justify ordering from a vendor and getting it delivered, but it is a hassle to do the shopping oneself.

It would be a massive help if you could do this errand for me, Anzu-san.

Just a moment, please. Allow me to make a list of the items we need purchased. Correction fluid, a Bible, chocolate bonbons… Hm, what is it?

You’d like me to draw you a picture? No need to be so mean; you know that I possess no artistic talent.

Umm, well then… A turkey, then, a Christmas tradition.

The turkey’s saying, “Thank you for doing the shopping, Anzu-chan! ♪” How’s this?

Fufu. I am glad that you like it.

Thank you very much. I had been overwhelmed with busyness up until some moments ago, but…

I feel somewhat more at peace now. Thanks to you, Anzu-san. ♪

Anyhow. For this upcoming year’s end…

Let us end it meaningfully, and without any regrets. Although I’m sure you know that well, Anzu-san…

Ah, right, yes… The items I need for this errand aren’t ones necessarily needed right away.

So please do take your time strolling around town as you shop.

It is a delight simply to wander around with all the beautiful lights put up everywhere. …It’s a tad early, but nevertheless, Merry Christmas. ♪

[ ☆ ]

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The word here used is zokubutsu (俗物), the same word Shu often uses to describe Mika (and sometimes other people as well).

A japanese idiom, neko no te mo karitai (猫の手も借りたい) used to describe extreme business. Translated literally here so Anzu’s cute way of offering to help makes sense!

[newzealandmozsombi]

Fiordland day 2

Today was a rather chill day and I really needed that. Had a good porridge in the morning, wrote the previous post and then went for on a short hike with Andrea. Now I feel like drawing sketches so i’ll make a sketch of this one. But first some back story. She told me she met some locals a few days ago who showed her a canoe that was hidden on the shore by someone and is now in community use so basically if you know where it is you can use it. We found it, put it on the water and paddled across the small river to reach the trailhead. Okay the river is not that small, there are ferries and cruise ships on it (we had to get through the waves of one of them actually) and the crossing is right where the river and Lake Manapouri join.

The hike itself wasn’t that impressive although I still cannot get over the greenery. In the end we got a pretty good view at the lake from a higher spot and saw some trees hanging over the ledge due to errosion. They looked cool. We had a really great conversation about politics and spiral dynamics, that was probably the highlight of my day.

I actually wanted to go for a swim on the way back but the wind picked up while we were hiking and it wasn’t cold but wasn’t warm enough anymore to go into the water. The wind also meant that there were waves and we weren’t sure whether we can make it back without flipping over but in the end was fine. Oh yeah, did I mention that there were actually no proper paddles in the canoe?! There was one with broken ends so the flappy parts were as thin as the handle and a piece of wooden lath that was a bit wider so could push the water better..Anyway, we managed. It felt like a mini adventure, it was fun.

These cars are from the campsite. It’s a bit vintage and pretty quirky campsite, I kinda like it. There are these old cars parked all over the premise, the main office building looks like an old house from Tirol, there is stuff written in german all over the place and I just noticed the austrian national symbol above my head on the ceiling in the living room while typing this. Cool place, I liked it here. Big trees, good kitchen (bit small but well equipped).

Regarding the next few days it seems like I’m gonna stay in Te Anau, Andrea is doing pet sitting there (looking after people’s dogs and staying at their place while they’re away) and she offered me to stay over which I gladly accepted. I wanna express how grateful I am about this, and just ponder over the fact of meeting a random person on the other side of the world (her also coming from a different side of the world) and being offered a place to stay without anything in return. Not to mention the great chats that we can have so yeah. Here’s to that! Tomorrow I’ll drive over there (it’s a 15 min drive from here) and probably have a really chill day, weather should be grey with rain overnight. Not sure what I wanna do on friday, if it clears up maybe I’ll go back to the Milford area, there is an amazing hike Andrea did there and if it’s sunny i’d be keen to do that. Maybe checking out some Lord of the Rings locations? I found out that there are quite a few in this area..

Days like these are needed sometimes, going non stop can be really exhausting and after a while each mountain and lake combo just becomes “oh yeah another one” without being able to actually appreciate it. My brain gets flooded with stuff and I can’t come down from this high of constant new exciting stimulation and slowing down just becomes more and more difficult.

Since I already drew a sketch I feel like drawing another one with the spots I stayed at until now (not including daily excursions, only places where I stayed at least for one night. For those who are wondering, I am not planning to see the southeast (or coastal places really) there aren’t any proper mountains to hike or bike stuff to ride and there are plenty of those places still to discover on the westcoast and north so I will prioritize those.

Obligatory song suggestion:

Linkin Park - Good Things Go

I think this is actually a sad song but I just listened to it for the second time today so that must mean something, I really like the vibe. It’s from the newest album with Emily (new singer) and I love how her and Mike’s voice are mixing in this song.

[m39]

Doom WADs’ Roulette (2009): Cheogsh 2

Surprise!

No clowns to scare you today!

But, yeah, change of plans, people. It looks like the version of GZDoom that I’m using is incompatible with Happy Time Circus II, so I had to use ZDoom; and with this rather archaic source port, combined with walking through darkness most of the time, trying to guess where to go, and the gnawing, bouncing heads from the first HTC returning from that map, I’ll have to slowly play it bit by bit in between reviewing other Doom maps/WADs if I have to keep my sanity intact.

Also, forgot to mention in my Killing Adventure review that I am promoting that WAD to the main Revenant Awards ceremony.

S2: Cheogsh 2

Main author(s): Shadowman and Guest

Release date: November 19th, 2009

Version(s) played: ???

Required port compatibility: GZDoom

Levels: 7

The original Cheogsh map was one of my favorites from the 2007 Cacowards. And today, we will be looking at its (sorta) sequel, with more maps, more stuff, and being more ambitious. But after two years in development, did the main author’s ambitions overwhelm this WAD?

Okay, spoilers right not since I don’t care – IT DID.

But how much did these ambitions ruin the sequel to what I thought was a pretty good map? Well… Allow me to tell.

Review based on one playthrough with no screenshots (I really need to add it as a rule).

Oh, right. There is also a plot that is generic some marine dudes have gone missing and it all goes to shit from there. Not really much to talk about.

Now, to properly start talking about this WAD, I can at least say that, like the first Cheogsh, it looks great. It’s basically the same style as with the previous Doom map, but on seven, hub-based maps and adds new stuff like the crystal mines and buildings that weren’t originally in the city section.

Music was also great to listen to. I recognized at least three tracks from the first Cheogsh (which were already great), and the new ones are enjoyable to listen to. I wish I had more to say here.

Now, properly playing Cheogsh 2 is… oh boy… Where do I begin?! Remember how I said that the first WAD wasn’t really that complicated to play through? Well, it looks like the main author decided to snort some of that moon dust and turn it into an overly-complicated, mind-numbing filth that sucks the fun from playing this WAD.

Yeah, it’s one of those WADs that are style over substance. Now, it is not as painful to play before visiting New City of the Damned since you mostly depend on your sight to find important switches, where to go next (like through the passage in one of the gardens in Border Village), and knowing that three rooms are available near the library in Temple of Seth at the start. But as soon you reach the city itself, it all goes down the shitter.

Sure, in the previous installment, you had a similar section with the demonic city with catacombs in a temple, but there, while only the catacombs part felt like a too-dark, mangled maze full of switch hunting, here, not only the catacombs section is bigger than the original Cheogsh, but all of its cons spread to the city as well. It got so bad that I refused to go further without giving myself night-vision goggles through cheating each, bloody minute!

It was that painful to play this part; to the point that I thought I glitched the map until I found out that the silent teleporter that loops one section of catacombs can be beaten by running backwards as soon as you touch it. Now try figuring it out without a guide, you re*YOUTUBE*!

I’m not entirely sure if the cutscenes are better or worse here. On the one hand, you can change how long the dialogue stays on screen (once you bind the key, of course), so you can swipe them really fast if you don’t care about this shit. On the other hand, there are at least 1-2 cutscenes without dialogue that just show you what’s happening on the screen, and it takes a while for them to end. I’m not sure if they can be skipped as well, but I think it would be really beneficial if you were able to do that.

Aside from two new keys (black and white skulls in the city area), there are also a few new items such as blood flask and soul gems that are used for progression. There is also something called Osiris’ Eye; I’m not sure what it does, and I don’t even think I grabbed it when I played the WAD.

I don’t know what to think of the difficulty. It was far from being hard but there were moments that felt like an artificial bump in it, like the final boss and the mine section that I’ll get into in the moment.

Not to mention how I feel like the WAD sometimes respawns monsters when you move back to the earlier maps, and it feels like a punishment for not knowing what to do and where to go next.

The mine section is also annoying; you lose your weapons, and you have to find them back while wielding nothing but reskinned chainsaw. Oh, and also you end with a single-digit health. It kind of feels like a filler since it adds nothing to the WAD aside from the challenge that feels next to impossible if you try to get your guns back without finding secrets.

Of course, like the previous installment, Cheogsh 2 has new enemies. Aside from all of the enemies from the first Cheogsh (minus the boss from that map), there are also additional enemies like one new variant for Imp, Lost Soul, and Revenant (that pretends to be dead and is blue now), along with a couple of new Hell Nobles, like Afrit (the easy one). One of these is the final boss (I don’t know if it’s actually Cheogsh again); he reeks of bullshit due to shooting tiny, ridiculously fast projectiles and has shades that suck off your health fast as shit (and these are barely visible).

And… I guess that’s all what I have to say about this WAD. Cheogsh 2 is another WAD that collapsed under the author’s ambitions. It might be bigger in scope, but it also inflates the problems that were plaguing the previous installment along with adding new ones. Play the original map. It will give you more fun than this WAD (it gave me at least).

And since this is the only partial conversion runner-up I managed to beat (since I think I can stomach Happy Time Circus II for around an hour per day), I am promoting THIS WAD to the main Revenant Awards ceremony.

Hopefully, I will be able to/remember about finishing the scary clown Doom map part two.

Good thing that the next WAD on the list is from Eternal. Hopefully, it will wash out the stains this one left.

[rfhusnik]

There Is But One True City Of Sanctuary Parts One and Two

      Written By:  Rashon Leyf (Part One) and Orlon Braem (Part Two)

PART ONE

             Today, if not in a verifiable realness, then at least in a satisfying imagination, I’ve come to a tolerable acknowledgement of the relevance of all that’s occurred in the past, is occurring in the present, and may yet happen. And no one I think knows what should be considered a worthwhile understanding; nor does anyone understand what, or how much knowledge should be considered worthwhile to possess. But when I look at the world I see today, I know then that much of Earth’s past, present and future is unknown to me. It’s hidden from me. And yet, I’m so aware that my basic ongoing struggle is to simply navigate through the moments of the present. And yes, I’ve lived through an enormously small portion of the past, and the future will be mine in a very small installment.

Not long ago, when our city’s mayor George Jennifer informed me that “One True City Of Sanctuary” would be the last in what’s come to be a rather long series of internet postings, he said he envisioned it to be a disclosure of three parts. But he also said that as time passed, some other postings might yet appear, should their publication be deemed necessary by what he termed his “superiors from other earthly realities.”

            Well, apparently before we’ve even been allowed to “sign off” (as some people say) here, such a necessity has arisen! “One True City Of Sanctuary” was to have been a three part discussion written by myself (Part One), Orlon Braem (Part Two) and F. John Surells (Part Three). But when the various parts were received by our mayor, he determined that John’s Part Three would render the entire piece too long for submission. Yet, since he liked all of John’s words, he decided that rather than edit them, he’d simply use them as a separate posting. And he then informed me to edit my previously written Part One, to include within it what I’ve just divulged. Thus, welcome to what I guess will be the second to last in what’s become a rather long, yet in my opinion, well timed series of internet postings. Oh, and the mayor wants to apologize for previously informing readers that this would be the last disclosure. He said to me “Funny how easily plans believed to have been cast in stone can sometimes be broken. Oh, and Rashon, please remember to inform the readers that we reserve the right to publish yet again – down the road – especially since no one yet knows what the upcoming presidential campaigns will foist upon the American public.”

So, anyway. I suppose it’s rather unfortunate that a series of writings is basically ending. But, I feel it’s important to remember that perhaps the greatest topic that’s always been stressed in this forum is that people, places, and things change as years and eras pass. And yet, despite the truth of that previous statement, I feel it’s imperative for mortals to hold fast to those “realities of life upon Planet Earth” which have proven themselves to be of the utmost necessity to mankind as a whole. And although it may seem arrogant, or overly patriotic to say this, I think the continuance of the superiority of the United States Of America amongst all other nations should be a hoped for development in the decades and even perhaps centuries to come. But why would one say that? Simply, because the U.S. has shown itself to be a great mitigator of worldwide problems.

            Still, as years have passed, the great American nation has become infiltrated by massive numbers of foreigners who, despite what anyone says, will never be able to keep the U.S. as the world’s leader should they ever become its dominant ethnic majority. Yes America, if you don’t stop illegal immigration soon, eventually The United States Of America will become a Hispanic nation, joining all those others to its’ south. And, as dreadful as it is to ponder, who’s to say that at such a time, bogus reparations may not be sought from what had previously been America’s majority ethnic group?

            So, to stop that development is the challenge that we here in “the city” now leave to you the populace of the states in America, as we ourselves fade from a written spotlight. But of course time will continue on here as it will elsewhere. Yet our dedication here, where the outside world impacts us minimally, will be to continue on in the great lifestyle of the individual.  

                                                            PART TWO

            When I was a child, I lived in fear of all that surrounded me. My life was stressful because those I shared it with didn’t fully understand the specialness of the city in which we lived. And I feared that the life form that continued to breathe within me then, was but a phantom of all it probably should have been. But after I’d grown to adulthood, one day I received a call from our city’s then mayor Ralph Hawk. He told me that besides being mayor of our city, he was also the leader of a group of what he termed “underground types” who had recently been establishing residence along the northern banks of the river which divides our city economically as well as geographically.

            And as you know, I accepted Ralph’s invitation to join the artful types by the river. But whether I was worthy to be counted among them, or whether my words were ever of any value to mankind, still isn’t known. Maybe someday some of what I’ve said, done and written will be found to contain some societal, spiritual, humanistic, or God only knows what sort of merit. Nonetheless, I guess that’s all I can hope for now, and from this day onward, all I’ll be able to live for. But I must not allow myself to find a scapegoat within the sorrow induced by pity.

            Oh, and self-pity is such a demon! Yet I wonder if people often fail to note its great strength and influence. And I also wonder if they sometimes designate the blame for wrongful actions to it. But yes, we do know some of self-pity’s manifestations. Along the roadways of life we spot it as a driver out of gas, stuck in a ditch, stymied by a flattened tire, or involved in accidental mishaps – but not accidents of a truly dire nature – not those in which someone was really injured or killed. No, self-pity is too weak a force to have become involved in such developments. For whenever truly heinous acts or crimes have been committed, self-pity has turned over the commandeering of life’s vehicle to other dreadful emotions worse than itself. And yes, we’ve also known them. They’re such as jealousy, despair, anger, or a few others which are the most tempting jewels sent forth from the haven of damnation to terrorize mankind. But of course whenever those dread emotions may have succeeded in their quest to lure mortals into the perpetration of various evils or debasements, they’ve been pursued down the highways of existence by the police forces of law, order, civility, and human rights.

            But I’d have to say that, as is the case with most I suppose, my outlooks on life have been substantially founded upon my interactions with those of the older generations still alive while I was young. And I’ve always believed that my parents’ generation, the so-called “baby-boomers” felt the same about their parents’ generation as I do about them. I’ve heard it said that living through the Great Depression and the second great war cast a cloud of pessimism, and even a lack of the desire of advancement upon that generation (my grandparents). And probably, because it had become fearful of spending much money, that generation also became fairly conservative as regarded its lifestyle or, perhaps we might accept the fact than many of that generation were conservative socially, while being liberal politically; and that can be a dangerous mix, especially when the resulting confused, and frankly hypocritical mindset is eventually bequeathed to future generations.

            And that mindset has, I fear, promoted mediocrity, and discouraged personal advancement. And thus, life today it seems is being lived exceedingly more and more to placate the non-concerned, the non-informed, and most dangerous of all, the careless. And it seems we now live in a society in which all humans are encouraged to be the same. And yet, despite all attempts made to “level the playing field” (God, that’s a ghastly phrase!) over, oh, let’s say the last seventy or so years, so much disparity still exists between each and every human! But my main criticism of those who are sanctioning and implementing such attempts, is that I fear they’re  always too concerned with what they consider to be “chances to succeed,” rather than with the innate differences of ability which exist between all mortals.

            And, amidst all my passing thoughts and realizations lies the brutal fact that time continues, and ours is always less and less of it. And all those goals that we and others had – were they only rays of sunshine quickly clouded? And who were the really great mortals? Were they the dictators such as Stalin? Or were they the conquerors such as Alexander? And was Alexander really great?

            Of course many say that “the commoners” are really the individuals who are living correctly. But personally, my heroes have always been those mortals I’ve considered to be living “carefully.” Still, of course mine has also always been a troubled sense of questioning. And, because of such temporal confusion, I’ve always clung to the appeasing truths and falsehoods of “the city.”

[nickgerlich]

A Convenient Truth

Next time you are in your vehicle, take a look around and start counting how many convenience stores you pass en route to your destination. They are on practically every street corner, and there are often two or more sharing the same intersection. C-stores are among the most necessary of retail establishments today, especially since most now sell gasoline.

It wasn’t always this way. The first 7-Eleven opened in 1927. It and the ones that followed were tiny by today’s standards, did not sell gas, and were not beholden to street corner locations. Often they were in the middle of a block, which now seems ill-conceived in that it could not attract people from two streets.

Today, c-stores are much larger, have much broader selections of merchandise, sit on two or more acres, and may have a bank and/or fast food co-branded outlet inside. There are more than 150,000 of these today, and without them, most of us would find our lives increasingly inconvenient.

But there’s a growing chain that is spreading out of Texas that challenges the notion of what a c-store is. Buc-ee’s, with 58 units spread between here and Florida, considers itself a c-store. It’s just that their stores don’t look at all like a 7-Eleven. Oh, and they’re going to break ground soon in Amarillo.

The new store here will be 74,000 square feet and sit on 20 acres. Need gas? An array of 120 pumps will be there from which to choose. While it is not quite the biggest unit in the chain—the biggest is in Sevierville Tennessee with 74,700 square feet—it’s not far behind. But an even bigger one—75,000 square feet—is planned for near Ocala Florida.

Is it truly a c-store, though? One for thing for certain, it is not a truck stop, because trucks are not allowed. RVs are welcome, but you can’t spend the night. How about we just call them travel centers then? Given the location on Amarillo’s east side (near where US 287 branches off I-40), it will be among eight legitimate truck stops, meaning that travelers will have a plethora of choices. It’s little wonder why some people consider Amarillo to be a truck stop town.

As a marketing prof, I stand in amazement every time I stop at Buc-ee’s. No, it’s not because I am buying food or merchandise. To me it is crazy how Buc-ee’s has developed a cult-like following, and people will interrupt their travels for an hour to shop and dine there. They have shopping carts, something you don’t see in a c-store. Perhaps their biggest claim to fame is clean rest rooms. They are immaculate.

Although the chain dates to 1982, it is only in the last five years or so that it started its explosive growth, as well as venturing out of state. A large portion of the merchandise is private label foods, along with a wide variety of souvenirs ranging from t-shirts to plush toys.

And umbrellas. I confess. I bought one, not because I wanted to show my allegiance, but rather because I was trapped inside their St Augustine Florida store when a downpour broke out. It was either buy an umbrella, wait it out, or get drenched. I gladly forked over $15.

So powerful is the Buc-ee’s brand that it sometimes spawns other retail, hotels, and dining in proximity. Take the Terrell Texas store, for example, which is situated near where US 80 breaks off I-20 east of Dallas. The area has blossomed from just Buc-ee’s to three hotels and a variety of fast food and retail choices. All because of a c-store that attracts hundreds of customers each hour.

Given their popularity, I am surprised they have not adopted e-commerce. Their website is pretty basic, much like you would have seen in the late-1990s. This is a golden opportunity missed, because specialty clothing, toys, and packaged foods can easily be sold this way to folks not lucky (I suppose) to have a Buc-ee’s nearby. Then again, Trader Joe’s has followed a similarly austere marketing program with great success.

I have monitored social media reactions lately concerning the groundbreaking, and noted that some folks wondered why Buc-ee’s did not build on the west side, closer to where much of Amarillo lives. But Buc-ee’s is not building this for Amarillo people. No, it is building it for travelers. And all this at a time when QT has arrived in Amarillo, along with the return of Circle K, adding even more c-stores—and more in keeping with the typical size—to the mix.

I am pretty sure that when c-stores arrived on the scene nearly a century ago, no one could ever imagine how the genre has evolved, especially with Buc-ee’s. I’ll be watching for them to open in Amarillo, and will no doubt pay a visit. I won’t be going to shop but rather to people-watch. I’ll bring the umbrella just in case.

Dr “Fill ‘Er Up” Gerlich

Audio Blog

[youunravelme]

jealousy jealousy

author’s note: hi...remember that time i wrote 2 fics and then disappeared? yeah me neither. i promise i’m still here, just trying to figure out life and force myself to write rather than just consume. this is already way too personal for strangers on the internet...anyway, here’s wonderwall (aka the jack x figure skater fic that no one asked for, this takes place in the figure skater universe that i have not written yet).

(oh and if you’re wondering, andrew is your figure skating partner)

jack hughes x figure skater!reader

warnings: nhl violence, cursing

him

it’s not that he hated andrew, it was just he wished he was the only one leaving bruises on your thighs. or the only one who got to kiss your cheek. jack watched from the stands as you two glided across the ice. he’d come to appreciate figure skating in the months you’d been dating ever since you’d forced him to try some of the basics of your sport and he’d fallen on his ass more times than he could count.

so it didn’t bother him, going to your performances, and watching you skate. he just hated how in love you looked when you gazed at andrew. or the way your legs would wrap around his head when just the night before--

he was getting ahead of himself.

at the end of the performance, when your smile was wider than the equator, an older woman to his left said, quite loudly if you asked him, to her friend. “i’m so glad they kept skating together after the break up, it would’ve been a shame to lose such chemistry.”

i’m sorry. 

what?

to say he was pissed when he saw you was an understatement. andrew’s arm around your waist just added fuel to the fire simmering in his chest. it made him want to throw away the bouquet of tulips he got you.

“what’d ya think?” you asked him with the biggest smile on your face, the silver medal dangling from your neck.

“you did great,” he stated, handing the flowers off to you. “can i talk to you?” he glanced at andrew and then the hand that still had not removed itself from your waist. “alone?”

you furrowed your brows but nodded anyway. you squeezed andrew’s arm and mumbled a thank you with a bright smile before following jack into a secluded part of the rink.

“what’s up, baby?”

“were you ever planning on telling me you dated andrew? or were you gonna just keep me in the dark about that?” your face dropped. guess he got his answer. “right. i’ll see you later.” jack moved around you, but your hand grabbed his arm gently.

“jack please, listen i didn’t think it was a big deal--”

“you didn’t think it was important for me to know that the person you spend the most time with, aside from me, is your ex?”

“you didn’t disclose all your exes either!”

“i’m not shoving my crotch in my ex’s face every day, nor am i making goo goo eyes at them for the entire world to see!” you didn’t say anything to that, so he took it as his cue to leave. “you did great tonight,” he said. “but i got to get home. i have a game tomorrow to prepare for.”

he walked away from you, and didn’t bother turning back, not even when andrew passed him and presumably went to your comfort. he didn’t get to see you reject andrew’s hug in favor of pressing the tulips closer to your chest.

when he got home, jack immediately called quinn. “do you have time to talk?”

“would you care if i said no?”

jack paused. “no. look this is an emergency.”

“shoot.”

“so you know the figure skater i’ve been dating?”

quinn hummed. “nice girl.”

“and you know how she has a male partner that she performs with, right?” quinn hummed again. “well apparently they used to date for like two years.”

“she told you that?”

“no, i found out through some random lady’s comment at her performance today. and then i got on the internet and well, i found out they dated for two years.”

“oh.”

“yeah, ‘oh’ is right. i mean why would she keep something like this from me? i’ve been honest, i’ve been working on myself because i thought i was crazy for thinking they had feelings for each other but they used to and hey, maybe they still do--”

“jack, you’re getting ahead of yourself. she’s with you, she likes you.”

“but what if he likes her? they spend all their time together, how am i gonna compete with that?”

quinn sighed into the receiver. “look, i’m by no means saying she should’ve kept this from you, because that’s a shitty thing to do. but as far as i can see? there’s no competition. you’ve already won. you got the girl, okay? he didn’t.”

jack wanted to agree, that at the end of the day, they chose each other. but he still couldn’t get over the thought of andrew’s hands and where they’ve been.

you

okay so you fucked up.

big time.

to be honest, you completely forgot about your past with andrew, seeing as most of it was overshadowed by over a decade of close friendship. but seeing the betrayal on jack’s face made everything ten times worse.

which is why you hesitated on going to his game that night only because you couldn’t decide if not showing up would make things worse or better. you came with andrew, which in hindsight was not the best decision you could’ve ever made, but when the new jersey devils asked you and your partner do to the ceremonial puck drop, your agent made it clear saying no would be a bad idea.

so you texted jack to give him a heads up that the both of you would be there and dropping the puck on orders of your agent but that you would still be watching the game afterward if he wanted you there.

he didn’t reply.

a knock on your door alerted you to andrew’s presence. so you scooped up your purse and put your platform high tops on before grabbing your keys and heading out.

“still nothing?” andrew asked. you shook your head. “do you think he’s being a little dramatic? i mean, he never shared all his exploits with his exes--”

“but he didn’t date a teammate, andrew.” you cut him off. “look, i get you’re trying to be supportive, but i’m in the wrong here.” andrew followed you down the stairs and out to his car.

“would it help if i told him i’m gay?”

“you mean would lying help? absolutely not.” andrew unlocked his car and you both hopped in. “do you need directions?”

andrew laughed. “i think i know where prudential is.”

you held up your hands and looked out the window as you tried to think of ways to somehow make the situation better.

or rather, keep from making it worse.

by the time you arrived at the arena, you were a basket case of nerves, suddenly second guessing every decision you made up to this point. “should i have just worn a t-shirt like you instead of his jersey? i’m wondering if i’m overstepping here.”

“look, there are few things that men love more than seeing their significant others in their clothes.”

“but does that rule apply to when you’re arguing?”

“it could!” andrew stopped you in your tracks, right before entering the arena, with his hands on your shoulders. “look, it’ll be okay. after tonight, if you only wanna hang out when we have practice until it all settles down, that’s fine by me.”

you looked at andrew and then back at the arena.

“okay.”

him

“hughesy, is there a reason your girlfriend asked me who is doing the puck drop?” nico asked him once jack walked into the locker room.

“she texted me earlier, i just haven’t replied. she’s doing it along with andrew,” he grumbled.

“trouble in paradise?”

“it’s a long story. and i don’t really want to talk about it,” he said as he pulled his gear on.

“you sure? might help to clear your head. if you’d like, you can do the puck drop if you want to see her--”

“--nope, i’m fine.” he sat down to put his skates on and stayed silent.

it wasn’t until they got onto the ice that jack started to calm down a little. the rink was his home, a place he could let go. he wasn’t worried about the problems in your relationship at the moment, not when he was playing one of the devils’ biggest rivals: the philadelphia flyers.

the team took a break from the warm ups to have the carpets rolled out for you and andrew. he couldn’t even look at you as you walked out, the announcer sharing all the accomplishments you share with andrew.

he stood to the side, ignoring the jabs from his teammates at the sight of you smiling and laughing. the thought alone had him consider forgiving you, until he glanced up right as andrew nudged you and the jealousy came back with a fiery vengeance. 

it only got worse when he saw nico give you a bear hug and in return you gave him an award winning smile.

honestly.

were you not even torn up about the situation you were in?

you

god, even looking at him hurt.

he didn’t even do you the courtesy of making eye contact, you would know, your eyes had only left his figure to smile at cameras or greet nico or the flyers’ alternate captain. maybe, if jack decided he actually wanted to be with you still, you could ask him who the hell that guy was.

when you and andrew turned around, he held the puck out for you. “you want it?” he asked.

you shook your head. “i’d rather have one that jack gave me, than remember the night he ignored me the entire time.”

him

was that his jersey you were wearing?

honestly he spent so much time trying not to look at you that the 86 on your sleeve didn’t pop out at him until you turned around and his teammates started catcalling at the sight of his last name on your back.

“that your girl, hughes? or just a fan?” mercer teased.

“shut up,” jack grumbled, but the heat in his cheeks was telling enough. he watched as you made your way back to the stands before he had to focus on getting his mind ready for the game, and much of that included forgetting what happened the day prior.

which he would love nothing more than to do.

you

“is this your first game wearing his jersey?” andrew asked as you took your seats.

you nodded, nervously wringing your hands as you watched him sit on the bench cheering on his teammates. there was no reason for you to be that nervous, but you couldn’t help but feel antsy anyway.

“hey,” andrew started. “what’s wrong?”

“i don’t know, maybe i’m still upset at myself? or scared he’ll break things off with me?”

your partner laughed. “that boy is too in love with you to break up after one incident. besides, you didn’t cheat you just--”

“forgot to tell him a key piece of information.”

“look, it’s not like you kept it from him maliciously. and given time, he’ll understand that.”

“i guess you’re--” you cut yourself off when jack got on the ice, your nerves shooting up tenfold. you watched him like a hawk, even if he didn’t have the puck.

hell, you weren’t even sure if andrew was talking to you because of how dialed in you were.

you didn’t move, you weren’t even sure you were breathing, until he scored, not even two minutes into being on the ice. you jumped from your seat and screamed, probably looking like a maniac or a fangirl.

you would consider yourself both at that point.

you watched as his teammates came up to hug him and slap his helmet. he spared a glance in your direction, giving you enough time to smile and give him a little wave. you fully expected him to ignore you like he’d done all night, but when his hand lifted up and waved back, you were on cloud nine.

the game started back up again and so did your excitement. 

until jack was slammed against the boards across the rink from you. if it weren’t for andrew’s hand holding your forearm in your seat, you would’ve jumped and yelled at the refs to do something.

“that’s not fair!” you shouted.

“it’s hockey,” andrew said like that was explanation enough.

“and? he just body checked him! jack is like 115 pounds soaking wet and that man--”

“--farabee--”

“--has like fifty pounds on him!”

“he actually doesn’t.” you whipped your head at andrew, ready to yell at him. “look, jack is fine. that’s why they wear pads. it’d be concerning if he was wearing a leotard like you and getting bodychecked, okay? this is the nature of the game.”

you crossed your arms. “i think it’s bullshit.”

him

he really hated farabee. and maybe hate was a strong word, but it felt like every two seconds he was getting checked into the boards which would’ve been fine if you weren’t there to see it happen.

“c’mon hughes, this is getting embarrassing.” was farabee’s latest quip of the night. and while he was no stranger to trash talk, something about the glint in farabee’s eyes was getting under jack’s skin. “that your girl right there?” he pointed to you while your brows were furrowed and head tilted. it would’ve been cute had farabee’s sudden interest in you not sent a cold chill down jack’s spine.

“shut up,” he grumbled before shoving his way past farabee in pursuit of the puck. but joel kept after him.

“she’s a looker, don’t ya think? how’d you manage to hit that?” jack’s fists clenched. “be honest, did you have to bribe her to go out with you? how much it cost? she looks like she’d be a good time--”

jack shoved him up against the boards. “shut the fuck up,” he all but growled before skating off.

keep your cool, jack. he’s just an asshole, you’ve dealt with assholes before.

he had the puck and was about to shoot before he was checked again, this time the wind being knocked from his lungs as joel stood over him. “go sit on the bench, hughes, while i go show your puck bunny a good time.”

that was it.

jack stood as quickly as he could and shucked his gloves off. 

you

horror was the only word you could use to describe the feeling that came over you as jack threw the first punch. you’d seen many of his games, often going back and watching clips on youtube, and never once have you seen him fight.

until today.

you were on your feet, clutching andrew’s arm, your fingernails digging into his arm. “oh my god,” you breathed.

you weren’t sure your jaw could drop any more than it already was. jack’s helmet came off first, but the other guy, “farabee” according to andrew, hit the ground first. jack was yanked down a second later.

if you were strong enough to break the glass, you would’ve just to get to him. because the punches didn’t stop, there was red on the ice, and you weren’t sure who was bleeding.

you hoped it was the other guy.

the refs split them up pretty quickly after farabee hit the ground. jack got up with blood trickling from his nose and lip, but looked otherwise unharmed. you didn’t care enough to look at the other guy.

“and keep her name out your mouth,” jack yelled across the ice as a ref ushered him to the penalty box.

your brow furrowed. surely he wouldn’t be dumb enough to...

you glanced at andrew who looked just as flabbergasted. “was that over...?” you trailed off.

“you or his mom,” andrew shrugged. a beat passed. “told you that toothpick loves you.”

him

his head felt ready to explode. though he wasn’t sure if it was because of the blood pumping from his nose or the rage he felt just a few seconds ago. but as the metaphorical dust settled, he searched the crowd for you only to find your eyes already on him.

you okay? you mouthed.

he nodded and drew his attention back to the game. he couldn’t look at you too long before getting angry again, this time, not at you but at the reminder of what farabee had said about you.

you might scold him for it later, in fact, if he was a betting man, he would’ve put money on the fact that you would, but it didn’t matter to him. normal trash talk was fine but involving you? poking an already open wound?

but he didn’t have time to worry about it, he’d figure it out after the game when he could touch your skin and assure himself that you wouldn’t leave him for someone else.

the second he was released back into the game, he came back with a vengeance. the fight wasn’t enough, he was going to score as many points as he could to beat their asses into the ground.

he was going to do it.

you

there was no way jack was human. or at least, not a superhero of some kind. there had to be some higher power that possessed your boyfriend’s body because he was a very good hockey player?

but that night? he was next level.

by the end of the game, he’d scored 4 points alone, and assisted nico in the one other point made by someone who wasn’t him. when the final buzzer blew, the score was 5-2, with new jersey taking the win.

“your boyfriend is insane!” andrew yelled over the cheers.

you smiled. “i know.”

the both of you walked towards the locker rooms, flashing your lanyard at security to let you through. 

“do you want me to wait for you?” andrew asked.

you shook your head. “i’ll get jack to take me home.”

“and if he doesn’t?”

“he will. especially when he finds out you left me.” andrew hugged you goodbye and departed towards the parking lot while you waited for jack to walk by. nico was first, smiling and hugging you quickly before heading back to the locker rooms. jack’s other teammates file out and wave, some stopping to give you a fist bump. 

unsurprisingly because fate was funny like that, jack was one of the last to head your direction. part of you seized up with fear, wondering if he was still mad about andrew, but the smile he gave you relaxed your shoulders.

jack dropped his helmet and stick in favor of holding you close. he held you tighter than normal, an arm around your waist, a hand in your hair, his face in your neck. 

“you okay?” you asked, trying to pull back to get a look at his face, but he only squeezed you tighter.

“i’m fine. just glad you’re here,” he mumbled into your neck. a beat passed before he pulled away and just stared at you. “did you drive here?”

you hesitated on telling him the truth, not wanting to ruin the moment but ultimately deciding lying would ruin things further. “i rode with andrew. he went home.” jack’s gaze darkened just a hair. “but i was hoping i could ride home with you.”

he nodded before leaning in to kiss you, pouting when you pulled out of reach. “baby--”

“your lip is split, hughes.”

“so?”

“i don’t wanna hurt you.”

“you’re hurting me now by not kissing me.” you sighed and gave in, your lips meeting his gently. 

“there, you happy?”

“nope,” he said, leaning back in.

“easy there, cowboy,” you laughed into his lips and placed a hand on his chest. “you need to shower.” you wrinkled your nose as the smell hit you finally.

“you mean you don’t love me as i am?” he teased.

you froze. you had yet to say those words but he didn’t seem to notice before someone was calling him away. “go,” you pushed him lightly towards the locker room. “i’ll be here.”

he kissed you one last time before running down the hall with his things.

you patiently waited for the thirty or so minutes it took for jack to get ready and speak with his teammates. he came out freshly showered and smiling despite the split lip.

“you ready?” he asked.

“i was waiting on you,” you replied.

jack rolled his eyes but tossed his arm over your shoulder and pressed a kiss to the side of your head anyway. the both of you stayed silent until you got in the car.

“do you wanna tell me what the fight was about?”

jack’s hand paused over the keys in the ignition before he turned the car on and shifted gears into reverse. “it’s nothing.”

you rolled your eyes. “you mean to tell me you got a split lip over nothing? i thought you valued honesty.”

jack sighed and put the car into drive. “he was making comments about you and i couldn’t stand to listen to them anymore.”

“what did he say?”

jack’s jaw clenched, as did his hands on the steering wheel. “it doesn’t matter. it’s over with.”

“if it bothered you, it matters, jack.”

“i’m not comfortable repeating it,” he said. “it’s over now, let’s just go home.”

you paused. “your home or mine?”

he reached over the center console and held your hand. “mine, if that’s alright.”

you nodded, words failing you for a moment. the air still felt tense, though you weren’t sure if it was from the argument you had or the game itself.

but it was the lack of communication that got you here in the first place, so you spoke up. “are you still mad at me? because i don’t blame you if you are, i just thought i’d ask.”

jack was quiet for a moment, letting your words permeate the air. “not really, but i’m still confused as to why you didn’t tell me you’d dated andrew before.”

some deep-seated part of you wanted to shrug it off, but you knew you might view it as casual, he might take it as being flippant. “it was so long ago,” you started. “and when i look at him, i don’t see my ex, i just see my friend who’s grown up with me.”

he nodded, hand still clutching yours. “what do you see when you look at me?”

you swallowed down the fear building in your chest. you hadn’t said those three words yet, but maybe now was the time? andrew’s words kept repeating in your head. told you that toothpick is in love with you.

you breathed.

“i see the love of my life.”

[solly-dendy]

Better than you could aspire to be (Part 3)

Part 2 here! Gender neutral reader! It mentions wretching, but there is nothing that mentions that in too much detail.

Taglist: @forgotten-blues

--

You approach the Avidya forest with Alhaitham with you, notebook and pen on your person as you intend to interview the forest ranger that remembered you. Looking up, you see them talking to Tighnari, him audible enough that you knew he was giving them a tougher route today. You call up to the forest ranger, Alhaitham standing next to you so that Tighnari wouldn't get any ideas on how to be rude to you next.

"_!" They exclaim. "What brings you back to your roots? Planning on coming back?"

Tighnari looks over, visibly confused, but you don't have the time to waste as you only had today in the near future to get to the bottom of this.

"May we interview you?" Alhaitham asks, the forest ranger nodding eagerly before Tighnari huff out of frustration.

"We can deal with the route as well, if that would help!" You offer up. Tighnari raises a brow, now curious about this offer of yours.

"Oh, can you now?" He teases, making you feel like an ant under his gaze.

"They trained you, of course they can!" The forest ranger scolds Tighnari, who seems to think it's a joke. "Don't you forget they taught you the basics."

Tighnari shakes his head out of disbelief, still believing you had no experience in the forest.

"Fine." He gives in. "Don't come crying if you fail though."

Well, that was rather harsh of him. You knew he had the amnesic treatment, but you don't remember him being that horrible with his words.

You decide to get the route sorted first, Alhaitham assisting and picking up techniques as you trained him while doing the job. It felt nice, training someone in the field you used to work in before Tighnari came along.

"You should think about being a forest ranger, you bookworm." The forest ranger teases after the three of you have chosen to take a seat, the withering cleared. Looking over, you laugh when you see he had pulled out a book, reading it.

"What was the interview about, then?" The forest ranger asks, causing Alhaitham to put his book away, now remembering the initial reason for finding them.

"We are here to ask you some questions." Alhaitham states. "Some questions regarding your knowledge of _."

The forest ranger nods in understanding, and they explain that the last time they saw you before you disappeared everyone was talking about Tighnaris vision. They explain that they recall Tighnari returning from a short walk somewhere discrete with a bag filled with tablets, which he ordered everyone to take. Everyone else took it without thinking, but the forest ranger couldn't stomach it. In the privacy of their own home, they tried to take it only to become extremely nauseated from the stench that came from the tablet itself. They recall hearing some people wretching before taking the tablet, which stopped them from taking it.

"Do you have the tablets on your person?" Alhaitham asks, the person shaking their head before explaining it was back in their home.

Which led to the three of you walking back to their place. Alhaitham takes the tablets from the person, thanking them for their support in the investigation regarding the situation to which the forest ranger smiles and insists they weren't going to use the tablets anyway. Alhaitham remembers the time, and he reminds you he has work tomorrow.

"Oh, is that the time already?" You say, Alhaitham nodding as he allows you to have a short conversation with your forest ranger friend. "Well, thank you for the help! It was really nice to catch up with you, even if it is about an issue. As much as I would like to return, I'm sure you've figured out why this isn't ideal.". The forest ranger nods, before remembering they had something they wanted to give you. They grab a small package, and the scent is enough to tell you it was a snack that they created for you, one you particularly enjoyed.

As both you and Alhaitham head off, Tighnari watches on as he tries to process why you had such a fixation on the tablets this forest ranger refused to take. Tighnari was aware they didn't take the tablets, but he didn't understand why he himself started taking them. Cyno did advise him to have everyone take the tablets daily, and over time people got used to the rancid smell that came off the tablets, and Tighnari figured he was as well not questioning it.

Now, he was going to try and figure things out himself as well. Usually, he would figure out the effects mushrooms had when ingested by taking them himself, but this time he was going to stop ingesting something to investigate the properties of the tablet.

The first night, he recalls the time you left, explaining you had to meet with Cyno. Tighnari recalls a strange feeling of yearning, almost as if he wanted you to praise him for getting a vision. He also feels a sense of fear, almost like a part of him knew it would be the last memory he'd recall of you. He doesn't think much of this, assuming this was probably some sort of strange dream he had.

The other nights prove him wrong however, as he recalls more and more memories of you. The first withering he tried to cleanse, only for you to help him out when he failed to clear it by himself. The time he messed up a medicinal paste, and how you pointed him in the right direction. The time you gave him his bow, and the target you crafted for him to practice on.

And then, he finally remembers the first night he had in Teyvat. The feeling of fear, knowing he was in a foreign world he knew nothing off, the wave of relief when you were open to him staying, the sense of comfort he remembers having when he changes out of his fast food uniform that stinks of oil.

Thing is, Tighnari never dreamed. And even if he did, he wouldn't have recalled these 'dreams' in so much detail. He thinks to himself, and he realises that the medication he was taking was a known amnesic. How he didn't realise it, he didn't know. With this being said, he realised that the forest ranger was smart to go against his recommendation to take the medication.

The forest ranger remembered that it was you who brought Tighnari up to be as competent as he was. He remembers you were close to Cyno, and he remembers that it was Cyno himself who gave Tighnari the tablets.

As he's about to tell the other forest rangers they no longer need to take the medication, however, he's met with Cyno at his front door.

"You stopped taking your medication."

[respectable-username]

🔐 Why You (Probably) Don't Need A VPN

A rant by a software engineer sick of VPN ads from her favourite YouTubers

TL;DR:

Here are some legitimate reasons the average internet user might want to use a VPN:

To connect to their company's internal network

To bypass the Great Firewall of China (or other types of website blocks at country or organisation level)

To watch Netflix etc as if you were in another country

Here are absolutely rubbish reasons to use a VPN:

Privacy

And today, I'll tell you why.

Hang on, won't a VPN stop hackers from stealing my passwords?

I mean, it does encrypt the web traffic coming from your device.

You know what else encrypts web traffic coming from your device? Your browser.

Yes, in the year 2021, pretty much all websites on the internet are accessed over HTTPS. The "S" stands for "secure", as in "your request will be securely encrypted". If your browser is using HTTPS, nobody can capture the data you're sending over the internet. More detail in the "I like too much detail" section at the bottom of this post.

It's very easy to check if you are using HTTPS by looking at your URL bar. In most browsers, it will have a lock on it if secure:

(From top left to bottom right: Chrome on iOS, Safari on iOS, Chrome on Windows, Edge on Windows, Firefox on Windows, and Safari on Mac. Screenshots reflect the UI at the time this post was written. Oh gosh this has taken over 4 hours to write.)

But isn't moar encryption better? What if somebody breaks HTTPS?

For starters, nobody's breaking your HTTPS, and there isn't any benefit from double encrypting. This is because of the maths behind encryption/decryption!

Encryption works kinda like a lock and key, except the lock is maths and the key is a special number only known to the person allowed to unlock the information.

The important thing is, without the key, all the locked data looks like complete and utter garbage. Completely unusable. Barely distinguishable from random noise. There's absolutely no way to tell what the original data was.

The other important thing is that the key is nearly unguessable. As in, with current technology, will generally take more than the lifetime of the universe to guess by chance. And when technology gets faster, we just make the numbers bigger again until they're once again secure.

For any major website you use, they will use a strong encryption algorithm (ie lock) with big numbers so your keys will be strong enough to withstand an attack. This means your data is safe as long as that lock icon is in your URL bar.

A VPN will not make the existing garble any more garbled. The extra $10/month or whatever you're paying for does not buy you any extra protection.

If you want to know more about how encryption and HTTPS in particular work, see the "I like too much detail" section at the end of this post.

Something something viruses

How's a VPN going to stop viruses? It controls the path your internet traffic takes, not the content that gets sent down that path. I guess it could block some known virus-giving hosts? But if it's known to the VPN provider, it's probably also known to the built-in antivirus on your computer who can block it for you.

(Oh yeah, 3rd party antivirus is another thing that's not worth paying for these days. Microsoft's built-in Windows Defender is as good as the third party options, and something something Macs don't get viruses easily because of how they're architected.)

Honestly though, keep your software up to date, don't click on anything suspicious, don't open files from sources you don't trust, and you'll be right most of the time.

And keep your software up to date. Then update your software. Hey, did I mention keeping your stuff updated? Update! Now! It only takes a few minutes. Please update to the latest version of your software I'm begging you. It's the number 1 way to protect yourself from viruses and other malware. Most major software attacks could have been prevented if people just updated their damn software!

But my ISP is spying on me!

Ok, it is true that there are TWO bits of data that HTTPS can't and won't hide. Those are:

The source of a request (your IP)

What website that request is going to (the website's IP)

These are the bits of information that routers use to know where to send your data, so of course they can't be hidden as the data is moving across the internet. And people can see that information very easily if they want to.

Note: this will show which website you're going to, but not which page you're looking at, and not the content of that page. So it will show that you were on Tumblr, but will not show anyone that you're still reading SuperWhoLock content in 2021.

It's this source/destination information that VPNs hide, which is why they can be used to bypass website blocks and region locks.

By using a VPN, those sniffing traffic on your side of the VPN will just show you connecting to the VPN, not the actual website you want. That means you can read AO3 at work/school without your boss/teachers knowing (unless they look over your shoulder of course).

As for those sniffing on the websites end, including the website itself, they will see the VPN as the source of the connection, not you. So if you're in the US and using a VPN node in the UK, Netflix will see you as being in the UK and show you their British library rather than the American one.

If this is what you're using a VPN for and you think the price is fair, then by all means keep doing it! This is 100% what VPNs are good for.

HOWEVER, and this is a big "however", if it's your ISP you're trying to hide your internet traffic from, then you will want to think twice before using a VPN.

Let me put it this way. Without a VPN, your ISP knows every website you connect to and when. With a VPN, do you know who has that exact same information? The VPN provider. Sure, many claim to not keep logs, but do you really trust the people asking for you to send them all your data for a fee to not just turn around and sell your data on for a profit, or worse?

In effect, you're trading one snooper for another. One snooper is heavily regulated, in many jurisdictions must obey net neutrality, and is already getting a big fee from you regardless of where you browse. The other isn't. Again, it's all a matter of who you trust more.

For me personally, I trust my ISP more than a random VPN provider, if for no other reason than my ISP is an old enough company with enough inertia and incompetence that I don't think they could organise to sell my data even if they wanted to. And with the amount of money I'm paying them per month, they've only got everything to lose if they broke consumer trust by on-selling that data. So yeah, I trust my ISP more with my privacy than the random VPN company.

But my VPN comes with a password manager!

Password managers are great. I 100% recommend you use a password manager. If there's one thing you could do right now to improve your security (other than updating your software, speaking of, have you updated yet?), it's getting and using a password manager.

Password managers also come for free.

I'm currently using LastPass free, but am planning to switch after they did a bad capitalism and only let their free accounts access either laptop or mobile but not both now. I personally am planning to move to Bitwarden on friends' recommendation since it's not only free but open source and available across devices. I also have friends who use passbolt and enjoy it, which is also free and open source, but it's also a bit DIY to set up. Great if you like tinkering though! And there are probably many other options out there if you do a bit of googling.

So, yeah, please use a password manager, but don't pay for it unless you actually have use for the extra features.

No I really need to hide my internet activity from everybody for reasons

In this case, you're probably looking for TOR. TOR is basically untraceable. It's also a terrible user experience for the most part because of this, so I'd only recommend it if you need it, such as if you're trying to escape the Great Firewall. But please don't use it for Bad Crimes. I am not to be held liable for any crime committed using information learned from this post.

Further reading viewing

If you want to know more about why you don't need a VPN, see Tom Scott's amazing video on the subject. It's honestly a great intro for beginners.

I like too much detail

Ahhh, so you're the type of person who doesn't get turned off by long explanations I see. Well, here's a little more info on the stuff I oversimplified in the main post about encryption. Uhh, words get bigger and more jargony in this section.

So first oversimplification: the assumption that all web traffic is either HTTP or HTTPS. This isn't exactly true. There are many other application layer internet standards out there, such as ssh, ftp, websockets, and all the proprietary standards certain companies use for stuff such as streaming and video conferencing. Some of these are secure, using TLS or some other security algorithm under the hood, and some of them aren't.

But most of the web requests you care about are HTTP/HTTPS calls. As for the rest, if they come from a company of a decent size that hasn't been hacked off the face of the planet already, they're probably also secure. In other words, you don't need to worry about it.

Next, we've already said that encryption works as a lock and a key, where the lock is a maths formula and the key is a number. But how do we get that key to lock and unlock the data?

Well, to answer that, we first need to talk about the two different types of encryption: symmetric and asymmetric. Symmetric encryption such as AES uses the same key to both encrypt and decrypt data, whereas asymmetric encryption such as RSA uses a different key to encode and decode.

For the sake of my writing, we're going to call the person encrypting Alice, the person decrypting Bob, and the eavesdropper trying to break our communications Eve from now on. These are standard names in crypto FYI. Also, crypto is short for cryptography not cryptocurrencies. Get your Bitcoin and Etherium outta here!

Sorry if things start getting incoherent. I'm tired. It's after 1am now.

So first, how do we get the key from symmetric crypto? This is probably the easier place to start. Well, you need a number, any number of sufficient size, that both Alice and Bob know. There are many ways you could share this number. They could decide it when they meet in person. They could send it to each other using carrier pigeons. Or they could radio it via morse code. But those aren't convenient, and somebody could intercept the number and use it to read all their messages.

So what we use instead is a super clever algorithm called Diffie-Hellman, which uses maths and, in particular, the fact it's really hard to factor large numbers (probably NP Hard to be specific, but there's no actual proof of that). The Wikipedia page for this is surprisingly easy to read, so I'll just direct you there to read all about it because I've been writing for too long. This algorithm allows Alice and Bob to agree on a secret number, despite Eve being able to read everything they send each other.

Now Alice and Bob have this secret number key, they can talk in private. Alice puts her message and the key into the encryption algorithm and out pops what looks like a load of garbage. She can then send this garbage to Bob without worrying about Eve being able to read it. Bob can then put the garbage and the key into the decryption algorithm to undo the scrambling and get the original message out telling him where the good donuts are. Voila, they're done!

But how does Alice know that she's sending her message to Bob and not Eve? Eve could pretend to be Bob so that Alice does the Diffie-Hellman dance with her instead and sends her the secret location of the good donuts instead.

This is where asymmetric crypto comes in! This is the one with private and public keys, and the one that uses prime numbers.

I'm not 100% across the maths on this one TBH, but it has something to do with group theory. Anyway, just like Diffie-Hellman, it relies on the fact that prime factorisation is hard, and so it does some magic with semi-primes, ie numbers with only 2 prime factors other than 1. Google it if you want to know more. I kinda zoned out of this bit in my security courses. Maths hard

But the effect of that maths is easier to explain: things that are encoded with one of the keys can only be decoded with the other key. This means that one of those keys can be well-known to the public and the other is known only to the person it belongs to.

If Alice wants to send a message to Bob and just Bob, no Eve allowed, she can first look up Bob's public key and encrypt a beginning message with that. Once Bob receives the message, he can decrypt it with his private key and read the contents. Eve can't read the contents though because, even though she has Bob's public key, she doesn't know his private key.

This public key information is what the lock in your browser is all about BTW. It's saying that the website is legit based on the public key they provide.

So why do we need symmetric crypto when we have asymmetric crypto? Seems a lot less hassle to exchange keys with asymmetric crypto.

Well, it's because asymmetric crypto is slooooow. So, in TLS, the security algorithm that puts the "S" in "HTTPS", asymmetric RSA is used to establish the initial connection and figure out what symmetric key to use, and then the rest of the session uses AES symmetric encryption using the agreed secret key.

And there you have it! Crypto in slightly-less-short-but-still-high-enough-level-that-I-hope-you-understand.

Just realised how long this section is. Well, I did call it "too much detail" for a reason.

Now, next question is what exactly is and isn't encrypted using HTTPS.

Well, as I said earlier, it's basically just the source IP:port and the destination IP:port. In fact, this information is actually communicated on the logical layer below the application layer HTTPS is on, known as the transport layer. Again, as I said before, you can't really encrypt this unless you don't want your data to reach the place you want at all.

Also, DNS is unencrypted. A DNS request is a request that turns a domain name, such as tumblr.com, into an IP address, by asking a special server called a Domain Name Server where to find the website you're looking for. A DNS request is made before an HTTP(S) request. Anyone who can read your internet traffic can therefore tell you wanted to go to Tumblr.

But importantly, this only shows the domain name, not the full URL. The rest of the URL, the part after the third slash (the first two slashes being part of http://), is stuff that's interpreted by the server itself and so isn't needed during transport. Therefore, it encrypted and completely unreadable, just like all the content on your page.

I was going to show a Wireshark scan of a web request using HTTP and HTTPS to show you the difference, but this has taken long enough to write as it is, so sorry!

I could probably write more, but it's 1:30am and I'm sleepy. I hope you found some of this interesting and think twice before purchasing a VPN subscription. Again, there are legit good uses for a VPN, but they're not the ones primarily being advertised in VPN ads. It's the fact that VPN ads rely so heavily on false advertising that really grinds my gears and made me want to do this rant. It's especially bad when it comes from somebody I'd think of as technologically competent (naming no names here, but if you've worked in tech and still promote VPNs as a way to keep data safe... no). Feel free to ask questions if you want and hopefully I'll get around to answering any that I feel I know enough to answer.

Nighty night Tumblr. Please update your software. And use a (free) password manager. And enable two factor authentication on all your accounts. But mostly just update your software.

[mithliya]

south korean men bullied a girl and her mother to suicide bc they thought she was using a feminist symbol in her twitch stream when she was in fact talking about font sizes (jammi95 if you wanna look it up). several female k-pop stars had their carreers ruined because they were accused of being feminists. nth room, an online sex trafficking site streaming videos of the rape of women and young girls they blackmailed was done by south korean men. they elected their current president because he's a raging misogynist and antifeminist. he plans to abolish the ministry of gender equality and family.

this isn't about race, it's about culture. sexism is not an innate quality of korean men, western men would do the same shit if they could get away with it. but not acknowledging how misogynistic a lot of korean men are does a huge disservice to korean women.

y’all… nowhere did i say they aren’t misogynistic too? nowhere did i say they were good and feminist icons? i simply expressed my distaste with the way people keep ranking one race of men as The Worst Men as if it’s that simple. today i shared something horrific a pakistani man did. a few days ago i reshared a terrible “religion” that is basically pedophilic sex slavery which exists in countries like ghana. ive shared white men partaking in sex tourism and harming women in the process. ive shared an arab man who raped a female refugee. pretty sure i shared the story about that swedish serial rapist as well. these are just at the top of my head but there are beyond dozens of stories of horrible misogyny men partook in and there is literally no race of men that hasn’t partaken in it. there’s something showing how horrible men of every single race and culture can be and how they all unite over their misogyny, and to see that completely go over some of ur heads and lead u to conclusions like “oh well pakistani men are the worst men” “arab men are the worst men” “south korean men are the worst men” “north african men are the worst men” “white men are the worst men” “black men are the worst men” is so absolutely tired at this point and it’s exhausting seeing u guys see misogyny that women go through at the hands of these men and then make it about their racial heritage. these men aren’t horrible because they have some sort of worse or inferior culture. the society itself is misogynistic (something we all deal with but, yes, to varying degrees) and they have legal and social power as a result. weve seen over and over that when men get the chance to remove our rights away and harm us, they will take it. nothing ive ever said has even slightly implied that people should not talk about ANY group of men’s misogyny, im simply sick of seeing men’s misogyny being reframed as in anyway relevant to their race. and it’s especially tired coming from white women or women that are outsiders to that group. how exactly is that supporting south korean feminists when u risk derailing their movement into something racial rather than feminist, instead of bringing awareness to male violence + misogyny and these horrific issues you’ve made mention of? we should be sharing these atrocities and encouraging women to fight back, not turning the focus from sex-based oppression to race. as u said western men can and will do the same if they have the chance, and much of what you mentioned HAS been done with various western men already. it doesn’t help anyone, not even korean women, when we obscure what the issue is: which is misogyny & male violence.