#today i was really sick and shit is happening now so idk how much energy i'm gonna have for the next week

[lunar-fey]

so i got really excited about skerples playing 999 and i had already been thinking about it real hard even before that but i ended up realizing that i felt as though i didn't remember it well enough. like she's gonna play it blind but just for me personally i was like. damn i love that game but i cant remember very much other than like. the major details. anyway i was gonna just wait but i ended up caving and decided to watch someone play it and man. that was such a right call. reexperiencing 999 has like. turned a light on in my brain. i feel like i remember how to write again.

[deliciousangelfestival]

You wanted some ideas for stories.

1. Two are from two different dimensions. Land in a mysterious third one, and the both of them have no idea how to handle it.

2. A woman in her 50s ends up finding out that she's actually a dragon and she literally has to up root her whole family including her very much adult children to go live with dragons.

3. Poor vampires working dead end jobs.

Idk if any of these will help. But sometimes I take two genres that might not go together and see what happens or I try to write something under 1k words. I hope you get rid of writers block soon.

Wow, this is really challenging. To anon who gave me this writing idea. Thank you !!!

1. Different Dimensions

Character: Steve Rogers x Female Reader

Y/N woke up in a mysterious land. Did she just sleepwalking? She only took a nap after taking care of the farm. Suddenly, a screen appeared in front of her.

Y/N L/N

Age: 25 Years Old.

Occupation: Farmer

Skills: Irrigation, Soil Management, etc.

What the heck is this? Did her brother put a VR headset on her head?

She touched her head, but there was nothing.

Y/N read this kind of novel when she had free time to read, and now she got sucked into this book, or she got transported to another universe?

Shit.

Suddenly, the screen appeared again.

Task 1 for player Y/N

Plant corn and potato.

[Equipment: shovel]

[Finish this will get 100 exp]

"....."

Damn to this world. She wants to go home. At least there's a cabin near her. Inside, there's a bed, fireplace, and kitchen. She has a place to stay. Y/N rolled her shirt. "Well, it's time for me to work." She planted the vegetable like the screen told her and saw her EXP bar fill.

On the third day, she saw a portal open. A screaming voice, "Ahhh."

'THUD.'

A person appears. He wore a blue suit. It looks like an armor. And he holds a shield with a star on it.

Wow, he came here more prepared than her.

He looked around and saw her.

"Ma'am. May I know where this is?"

Y/N shrugged her shoulder. "I want to know too. I found myself here when I woke up from my nap."

He was taken aback by her answers.

He murmured, "Damn you, Strange. You sent me to an unknown location again."

"My name is Captain Steve Roger from The Avengers and the supervisor of SHIELD. May I know your name?"

Never heard of that institution. Perhaps a secret organization.

"Y/N L/N, just a farmer." She raised the shovel in her hand.

Suddenly, they saw a light coming from beside the cabin.

Y/N rolled her eyes. "What is this time?" She went to the source of light, and Steve followed her lead.

There, they saw a plant coming out from the soil. Oh, it's a flower.

"What the fuck?" Steve cursed because a transparent screen suddenly appeared in front of him.

Class S Task.

Protect the flower for 100 days from sickness and monsters.

[This flower's main ingredient for eternal life.]

Protect it for 100 days, then both players could return to their own world.

'Go home.'

That's the two words Y/N and Steve like to hear. 'Growl.' A growled voice was heard near the tree. Y/N as a farmer, Y/N could find out what the creature is, and Steve, too, since he used to live in the forest because of World War II.

Y/n lifts her shovel and looks at Steve who raises his shield "Well Captain Steve. We need to work together so we could go home."

2. Dragon Birthday

Character: Female Reader

"I'm exhausted..." Today's work from your boss drained all your energy.

But she needs the extra money for life expenses and her son's college tuition. Since her messy divorce, her husband doesn't really care about them.

So she needs to do it alone. Before, she always went home after work, but now she's going to visit her mother's grave.

Before Y/N's mother died of old age, her mother told her to visit her grave on Y/N's 50th birthday.

Today is her 50th birthday, so she visits her mother's grave.

Deep down, she hoped her mother had a gift for her, like money? She really needs that right now.

Y/n put down the flower to her mother's tomb. "Mom, just like you said you want me to visit you on jy 50th birthday. Im alone, I didn't bring your grandson, and your son in law well... we separated."

Her husband choose work than his family. He didn't even say anything after signing the divorce paper and left for Egypt.

Y/N sighed. Sometime she wish that she could be awesome like her mother. But she's nothing like her mother.

Suddenly, the temperature at the graveyard turned cold. It's impossible when it's still summer.

"Who dare for disrespecting with my descendants???" A loud voice echoes in her ears.

What?? A dragon? Are you hallucinating because because you got overworked?

"Y/N L/N, one my of descendants."

Wow, the dragon really talks towards her.

"My descendants will get their power when they reach age of 50."

"What will I get if I accepted the power?" If she didn't get any gold today, at least she got a superpower.

"Strength, wisdom, and giving order."

She raised her eyebrows.

"I'll give you this power for 3 days. If you like it, come back here again. If you don't like it, just ignore it.

The next day, she tested the power. Y/N doesn't know how effective the power is. Her boss, who always gives a ridiculous task, she finally talks back, "You do it."

Her boss didn't say anything and did the job. When she called her ex-husband to pick up his stuff, he did. Even though he was in a different country when she called him, the next day, he was at the house carrying a moving box. Her ex is an archeologist, and his stuff removes all her space.

Y/N never thought this power could be helpful. So, on the 3rd day, she saw the dragon again. With this power, she loves the feeling of being confident.

"I'll accept the power."

"Excellent. If you want to make the power last longer you need to find other follower."

"There's more?"

"Yes."

"Where can I find them?"

Suddenly there's a stone appears on her hand.

"If you getting closer to the descendant the stone will glow. I gave you my blessing."

This means Y/N will go on an adventure; she could feel her blood boiling. It's time for her to be selfish; all this time, she always gives in and has low esteem. She never thought the gift when she reached 50 could be this good.

3. Poor Vampire

Character: Bucky Barnes x platonic!reader "Uh, Excuse me..James." A nervous blue collar holding a document towards his co-worker. "Yes?" "The deadline for this already passed but could you do this?" "Fine." The co-worker accepts the file without looking at the other person. "Fiuh, I thought he's going to kill me." "Ah yeah, our gatekeeper accountant. He always been like that but he does his job really well. I think he sleep at the office." "I never see him go home after 5 p.m." "Ouch, Y/N." Both employees touched their heads because someone hit them with a document.

"That's because he's fixing all the mistakes you guys made."

Y/N returned to her seat; she has worked in this company for 6 months. She notices one particular co-worker, James Buchanan Barnes. He's the most hardworking employee in this company and always works overtime. Y/N felt bad about him because others were taking advantage of him. Y/n wishes James could say no when people shove their work on him. She has seen bullying in the office multiple times. "Ehem, Y/N?" Speaking of him, James suddenly called her, she answered "Yes?" James talks without lifting his head from his monitor. "I've sent the file to your e-mail. Could you check it?" "Give me a minute." "Take your time." James, or his nickname Bucky, is blushing. He doesn't know if he wants to laugh or cry. The truth is that Bucky is a vampire, and he has a superpower: reading someone's mind. He could read everyone's thoughts, including Y/N. In this office, only she felt sorry for him and never asked him to do her job. But he wants to tell the truth to Y/N that he works overtime because of the extra money. He's poor as f**k. Vampire is a nocturnal being, so he doesn't need sleep. The reason why Bucky went bankrupt is because he trusted the wrong person. His butler, or the perfect word to describe it, is a thief. Bucky, a former butler, stole his money when he went to sleep for 30 years. When Bucky woke up, he owned nothing. Bucky's only goal is to save money and get revenge on his former butler, who stole his fortune.

[pedrospatch]

Ok, just found out what happened cause I was so busy yesterday I couldnt even finish reading the fic and I couldnt wait to do so... Im so sad this shit happens, seriously... You're one of the best writers in here, my fav one btw, and I know how much you care about everyone feeling good here in your space... This really makes me sick. Im so so so so sorry you felt like deleting something you created and so sad for you being now the target of clearly direct "indirect" posts... Vee, we LOVE YOU, us who follow you even if we're not as close as many other ppl here, know who you are and the kind and sweet person you always are to all of us. Dont forget that❤️

hi lovely.

people stated their posts aren’t about me and idk anymore but i’m just gonna put it all behind me. i truly do not have the energy to care about it, at the end of the day i need to just control myself because i can’t control what people think or say about me.

also, deleting the fic was my own choice because i just did not know what to do.

but after thinking about it and taking to countless lovely people, i’ve decided to just repost it, which i will do later on today.

thank you so so much for the love babe 🤍

[withleeknow]

I RAN OVER to share my tl today bc it's the softest crumbs and I'm not well after seeing these 🤧

hee really said “it's bangtan hours” + goes ahead to perform his heart out of spring day (of all songs 🥺) 🌸 https://tinyurl.com/38bjxfdn the way the crowd joins in, my armygene heart <3

this crumb comes with a warning (!) - it's my first time seeing jay cry on stage and my heart shattered into a million pieces https://tinyurl.com/bdek7ux5 the 🐈‍⬛ bears so much guilt for not being able to perform, hence the waterworks 🥺🥺 thank god for his baby brothers - https://vm.tiktok.com/ZGepu7Vod/ (+ the ongoing narrative of kpop idols apologising for their health rather than companies encouraging work-life balances that aren't at the expense of the idols' wellbeing has always been absolutely ridiculous 😟)

to lighten the mood, idk if you've watched today's skz code yet - I haven't laughed that hard in sooo long and it's just the kids showing that, once again, they have zero coordination or grace in any physical activity. ISAC 2024 ain't ready for SKZ. han, however, was 1000% in his element: https://vm.tiktok.com/ZGepuWjSg/

“last line of the series” reading this I've come to realise how I've grown so attached to WT ♡ I think you've written oc's stream of consciousness really well (and I think the nonlinearity makes it even more angsty!) so we're all on the edge of our metaphorical seats for mimo's (+ istg if either of them fumble this I'm going to flip the table and spam the shit out of you, and not in a good way <3)

this is beautiful :((( i haven't let myself listen to spring day in a while now bc i would just get all emo over the tannies. but his cover is so nice, thank you for sending it to me i thoroughly enjoyed it 😭

oh baby :( what happened to him tho? dunno if you've noticed by now but you're kind of my only source of enha updates bc if not for you i would be absolutely clueless on what's happening lol. but yeah kpop idols are always so overworked, it is actually vile on the companies' part. and especially with hybe ever since the tannies all enlisted, txt and svt and enha have been on the go nonstop and it's just awful to watch. a couple months ago i think beomgyu talked about being so sick while on tour and it was just terrible to see them go through that bc the company can't care about them enough to let them catch a break

i have not seen the new ep yet bc yesterday when it dropped i was also getting soaked fighting for my life trying to get home during a storm 🤣 and also i think i need to mentally prepare myself to watch wet mimo bc the last time i did (the time out mt eps) it left me seriously unwell 🫡 but look at hannnnnn :((( i want what he was on fr lmao i haven't had that kind of energy in ages it sure would be nice to be that excitable again 🤣

i honestly didn't think that people would like wt as much bc it's my first series here and tbh i was kinda testing the waters with wt lol. but i am really glad that people are liking it !! all my oc's are often emotionally constipated lmao, but it always makes me so happy when people say that they can relate, bc i always want my fics to resonate with people on some level. as for mimo's pov, i can't say anything for now but i can tell you that at least he's not as all over the place as she is 🤣 although i cannot promise you sunshine and rainbows for now i am fully prepared for people to scream over the last line of wt7.5 lmaoooooooo ehehehheh 🤭

[psychosomatist]

Talking to my ED therapist today and she said that it can be hard when people get physically sick like this because we can't hide it from other people anymore. I'm really fucking sick and hiding it isn't working. I adopted a cat and she's younger than I thought with more energy and she is still in my room with me all the time and it makes it hard to sleep. I'm ashamed to ask for help socializing her but I know I need to. I'm in PHP all day.

Last night I went over to Julio's and just wanted for things to be normal and they more or less were. Better actually. It had been like a month since seeing him. We talked and joked a lot and he asked me how I'm really doing. He said it's like pulling teeth to get me to say how I really am sometimes and I said I'd be more honest. He said he'll be more open telling me things about himself. 4 months in and I've asked him about his writing before but he never told me he's written a fair amount of published articles and went to Puerto Rico in the aftermath of Hurricane Maria to interview people.

But yeah I was afraid we wouldn't have anything in common still or there would be nothing between us anymore but that didn't happen. Instead I just felt really close to him. We talked for a long time, joked a lot. I like that he and I can have real talk without it feeling touchy feely in a way I don't like. Its hard to explain. I think like... it doesn't feel like he "holds space" so much as that the space is there and he's in the same space. He said he doesn't judge me for having essentially done this to myself when I asked and said he gets it when it comes to mental health issues. Then later said that he doesn't want to talk to a therapist who's not fucked up and asked me when I'm finishing school. So that made me feel a lot better.

We had really good sex for a long time, mostly vanilla, which was probably best for me with health stuff rn. It was really sweet, he just did a lot for me and kissed me a lot. He is the best fucking kisser.

Idk I just like our dynamic a lot. He's the only partner I've had as an adult who really treats me like an equal and who I feel listens to me. He can call me pretty and stuff because I know he sees me as a guy, but he sees me as the kind of guy that I am, a boy not a man. And like even though I like to bottom he doesn't make me feel like shit or hurt me. I don't know I just feel respected and valued. And I don't have to pull punches with saying "dark" stuff and neither does he, we don't sit and wallow in it or spin out though.

But yeah he said he'll be here for me and that he cares about me deeply. I don't know why but I trust him about feelings stuff in a way I don't trust many. I think it's because he's never fazed by things. He just accepts it and handles his own feelings around it and listens and genuinely wants to know, and he doesn't make me feel different after talking about it. Not sure, he's just a good listener. I can be vulnerable with him and he still respects me after. Idk I'm just glad that he and I still connected bc I was afraid we wouldn't.

When I was actually honest with him I said that being in there fucked me up and I'm not really ok right now and really sick a lot of the time and angrier than I've been in a long time honestly.

But I also said sometimes things just fuck you up and that's true.

But seeing him made me feel a lot better about everything. He's just really comforting to me.

Anyway. I started writing this post from the bathroom floor at 1:30am after waking in the night and puking my guts out. I'm trying to think of something nice. I have refeeding syndrome which put me in the ER the other night. Couldn't keep anything down until about a half hour ago at 11am and that's only a couple sips of water. I slept on the bathroom floor so I could wake up and throw up, I felt too weak to move + moving makes me nauseous + didn't want to wake my housemates so I was in the bathroom in the basement.

I can't believe how bad recovery has been so far. It's worse than getting sober was. I didn't think it could be. I didn't think I'd get this sick.

I was/am afraid I'd have to go to the ER again. Two days ago I didn't get seen for 12 hours. I know they were busy, it just wasn't what I needed and in the grand scheme made me worse bc I skipped eating and drinking for most of 3pm-6am bc I was on the waiting room and out of it. I'm glad I went because I know my heart probably isn't gonna stop now and they gave me fluids. That's all they'd do this time too if i went and tbh I'm not even good to drive this time. Earlier it was really bad, I couldn't move without gagging. But I'm able to get some Gatorade down now too. I'm hoping that I can just try to keep drinking things and get my fluids up again. It's dangerous for me to be dehydrated right now. But going to the ER is a last resort. I'm hoping I can get a Zofran prescription, I've been trying to fucking get one. It's hard to try and navigate all this by myself, operating at reduced capacity. I keep forgetting important things.

***

Later- got a scrip from my old doctor for Zofran thank fuck. About to drink some ensure. Cheers.

[sunkissedpages]

instead of you [part fifteen]

pairing: [best friend’s brother] tom holland x college!reader

summary: you didn’t expect to spend your summer pretending to be your best friend’s girlfriend- then again, you didn’t expect to fall for your best friend’s brother, either.

warnings: swearing, alcohol consumption

word count: 1.7k

series masterlist

Don’t tell Sam. Sam. SAM.

“Shit.”

You had to fix this in a matter of seconds. Should you slap him? Act like nothing happened? Pretend you were drunker than you actually were and play dumb?

“Wait, you’re not Sam?” you squinted your eyes like you were trying to see who was in front of you, acting like you were too drunk to remember who you were with. “Oh my god.”

“Y/n, I’m so sorry,” Tom tried. 

“I-” you didn’t know how to respond. “Why did you do that?”

He ran a hand through his hair and shook his head. “I don’t know, it didn’t mean anything!” You’d be lying if you told yourself that didn’t sting a little. If he didn’t have any sort of feelings for you, why would he kiss you? “I wasn’t thinking.”

“No, you weren’t.”

“I’m sorry,” he repeated. “Please don’t tell my brother.”

“You want me to lie to my boyfriend?”

“I mean, is it lying if you just don’t mention it?”

“It’s a lie of omission- are you really going to debate me about philosophy right now?”

“Then yes, I do want you to lie to your boyfriend because if he finds out he’ll never speak to me again.”

“You realize what kind of position that puts me in?”

He sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. “Yes.”

You couldn’t even think straight. Feelings of confusion, panic, anger, and regret fought for control of your conscience. “What if someone had seen us? Taken a picture of us? You’re a public fucking figure, Tom. That could’ve put your career at risk.” “Don’t you think I know that?” he growled. “I don’t need you to lecture me on how stupid it was.”

“You’re an asshole,” you scoffed.

“I know.”

You stood from the table to leave, hoping he wouldn’t follow you, but he called after you, your name echoing in your ears like a warning. Reluctantly, you turned back to face him with a bitter taste on your tongue.

“You won’t tell him, right?”

You stared him down for a moment, watching nerves etch themselves onto his features before answering. “You don’t have to worry about it.”

It was a promise you didn’t want to make, but you felt like you had no other choice. You hadn’t just broken the ‘no flirting’ rule, you’d blown straight past it into completely uncharted territory. And technically Tom had been the one to initiate, you hadn’t kissed him back, but you couldn’t say you hadn’t felt something when he did. 

You had never lied to Sam before- at least not on this scale. You felt sick to your stomach, and it had nothing to do with the alcohol. 

You almost didn’t want to go back to your room. You urged the elevator to go as slow as possible as you checked your appearance in the reflective wall. The tarnished gold was smudged with handprints, but you were still able to make out your ruined lipstick. You weren’t sure it had been messed up sometime during dinner, or if it was Tom’s doing but you couldn’t take a chance. You used your thumb to wipe away the evidence as the intercom on the elevator let out a ding to let you know you’d reached your floor.

With a shaky breath you pushed yourself into the hallway and forced yourself to put one foot in front of the other to walk to your room. You didn’t have a key, so you had to knock. You half-hoped Sam was already asleep, even if it meant you’d have to spend the night in the hallway. 

But as luck would have it he was still up and he opened the door seconds later. He was definitely out of it, blinking at you to put you in focus. 

“There you are,” he said tiredly, rubbing one of his eyes with his hand. “I was wondering when you’d come up.”

“I hope I didn’t keep you up,” you apologized as you breezed past him into the room. 

“Nah, I was just messing around.”

A lie, you knew, but you let it slide knowing you were keeping a much bigger secret. He was already dressed for bed in his boxers and one of your t-shirts and his hair was wet from a shower. 

“Are you okay?” he asked, noticing your anxious energy.

You nodded. “I had too much to drink.”

“Ah, me too, I think. Come take a shower. It’ll help.” 

You took his advice and tried to sober up in the shower, letting the cold water run over your bare skin until you were shivering. When it didn’t make you feel any better you turned off the faucet completely and dried off, wrapping a towel around your body and sitting on the edge of the tub. 

“Y/n?” came Sam’s muffled voice from the other side of the door. 

“Yeah?”

“Are you sure you’re okay?” 

You sighed. Why did he have to know you better than you knew yourself? You pushed yourself up from the tub and opened the door. 

“I had like three more shots after you left,” you mumbled.

The color drained from his face as he took in this additional information and he frowned. “Jesus, I thought I was drunk. Do you feel sick?”

“Not yet.”

“Okay, well let’s go to bed,” he urged. His accent was always thicker when he was drunk, and in a funny way it sounded like home, like all of those Friday nights back on campus. 

Sam gave you space to change into your clothes for bed and crawled under the covers to wait for you. You dressed yourself, hung your towel in the bathroom, and shut off the main light before feeling your way through the darkness over to the bed. 

You managed to get your drunk ass in bed without tripping which you considered to be a miracle. Sam slung his arm across your stomach as soon as you settled on the mattress and pulled you against his hip. You tensed underneath his touch, but he didn’t seem to notice. 

You couldn’t relax no matter how hard you tried, and sleep taunted you for hours, hovering just out of your reach. 

Sam’s alarm woke you from restless dreaming some hours later, when the sun had barely brushed the horizon. 

You groaned and rolled over onto your stomach, burying your face in your pillow. Your head was pounding and you didn’t even want to think about facing Tom. The simple motion of rolling over had made you nauseous and you knew that standing up was going to be a whole nother ordeal. 

“Come on, love,” Sam said, nudging you with his knee. He was already sitting up, rolling the tension out of his neck from a night on the stiff mattress. “We gotta be downstairs in a few minutes.”

Tears pricked at the corners of your eyes and you felt pathetic. You didn’t have the strength to be around Tom today, especially with Sam right there.

“Don’t feel good,” you moaned.

“We’re all hungover,” Sam sighed. “We’re not even doing that much walking today.”

You turned your head enough for him to see the tears running down your cheeks and he pursed his lips, expression turning worried. 

“Oh.”

“Can you make something up?” you pleaded. 

He nodded. “I’ll tell them you have a fever or something.”

You swallowed your shame and squeezed your eyes shut, whispering thanks into his shirt. Sam kissed your forehead and then got up. You vaguely heard him moving around the room getting ready, but drifted in and out of sleep as he did. 

Once he was dressed he softly told you goodbye, that he hoped you felt better, and that he’d bring you back some food later on. 

The door clicked shut and you let your guilt continue eating you alive. 

You wondered how Tom would react when Sam told his family you weren’t feeling well, if his face would give anything away. He was an actor, he should be able to handle it. But you also wondered what he was feeling, if he felt as guilty as you did- or even more so. Or maybe he wouldn’t even care. You never knew when it came to him.

You rolled onto your back and propped yourself up on a pillow, using the free time to respond to some messages from friends and family. It was the middle of the night back in the States, but at least they’d wake up knowing you weren’t dead. To be fair, everyone knew your communication skills weren’t the best so they probably weren’t expecting anything from you anyway, but you still wanted to put in the effort. 

The rest of the day passed by quicker than you would’ve liked. You spent it in bed, tossing and turning as you desperately tried to fall back asleep. You kept pushing the blankets off of you, then burying yourself beneath them again, flipping between hot and cold. Maybe you really did have a fever. Your clothes were suffocating you so you ended up stripping and dropping them on the floor by the bed. 

By the mercy of some higher power you were able to nap for a couple of hours scattered throughout the afternoon, but by dinner time you were wide awake again and passed the time by watching Avatar: The Last Airbender in Italian on the hotel tv. 

It was playing an earlier episode, the one where the gaang visited Kyoshi Island. You couldn’t understand any of the dialogue, obviously, but you still found comfort in the familiar scenes. 

There was a knock on the door suddenly, startling you out of your focus. You jerked your head towards the sound and scrambled from the bed. You slipped back into your t-shirt, but didn’t bother putting on pants before opening the door because you figured it was just Sam. And it was. He looked exhausted, but in the best kind of way and was holding a styrofoam container of food that was presumably for you.

“Forgot the key,” he said sheepishly, offering you the food. You smiled and took it from him, stepping aside to let him in. 

He didn’t take your cue, instead he stayed where he was standing in the doorway awkwardly. It was then that you realized he wasn’t alone, that his older brother had been standing behind him the entire time.

Sam offered no explanation, only shrugged like he didn’t know why he was there either.

“Tom?” you asked, awaiting an explanation for yourself.

“Can we talk?” 

ik tags haven’t been working idk why i’m sorry!!! but lmk what you think i always appreciate feedback!!

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[exmowitch]

How do you have patience with friends who constantly make your pain their own? I understand as humans our natural response is to compare and contrast so we can better understand someone else’s experiences. But my pain was always mine. It was never yours. 

And here I am returning to tumblr because I need a safe, somewhat anonymous space to talk about this shit show. 

long story short? well its still gonna be long so buckle up. 

my health has taken a nasty turn. i mean waking up blind, unable to move, bp 200/150+ type of turn. IIH, hyperPOTs, dysautonomia, etc are all suspected. ive dealth with being limited and having flares and people trying to push me beyond my limits my entire life. but now pushing me beyond my limits could result in a deadly episode.... so when i say no it means no. 

i was very calm today bc it wasn’t this person’s fault per se but after being in the sun without access to hydration (when i was told this wouldn’t be the case) though for a short period, I was really sick. i needed to sit down someplace cool with water or I was going to need an ambulance soon (which I didn’t express but you could probs see) and while i am grateful she took it seriously after me saying no i cannot walk around with them i am happy to sit here once inside while they do their thing - but then she was sobbing, and i was having to comfort her - UNABLE TO SEE OUT OF MY EYE, HAVING TO COMFORT HER that its okay that I am fine it happens and its not her fault.... but I didn’t have the energy to calm her down when I didn’t to monitor my vitals and keep calm and hydrate. 

me calming her down for something happening TO ME isn’t anything new, one times was me being dizzy after telling her repeatedly i need to sit down, no i can’t push myself anymore, and I started having tremors and got seizure-like. usually its when i am dealing with my own mental health stuff. its so draining and in ways its so toxic. i don’t think its intentional that she is aware of her toxic behaviors, but she lacks such depth and awareness that there is no room for communication. and any communication (and trust me we’ve rounds and i’ve blocked her multiple times) goes right over her head. she simples cannot understand. 

today she compared my life threatening symptoms to her claustrophobia. and i am not saying that this isn’t just as real for her -- i have my own OCD issues and I get it, it makes it physically impossible, but i guess it hurt as it always does that my word and the common send of hey my blood pressure is sky rocketing and I am going to have a bad episode and I can feel the pressure building in my neck just wasn’t cutting it.. and as much as my anxiety consumes and freezes me and i feel very much like I am dying, I will not die. But you know what could kill me? These scary episodes if I keep pushing myself, not listening to my body or getting treatment if my BP doesn’t go down. 

Idk.. it just pisses me off

[auburnaudry]

Fractured Family - Matthew Tkachuk

Chapter 1:

A/N: So this is the first time I have ever written literally anything. If you have any suggestions or feedback just let me know! I kinda want to make this a series, so if you are interested or have any suggestion on where to take this story I’m all ears!

Next Chapter —>

Summary: You and Matthew had a long history, dating for two years, until you guys “mutually” decided to split. It was civil and seemed liked the best option at the time. But shortly after splitting, you found out you were pregnant with Reign and everything in your life, including your relationship with Matt, became more complicated. (Flashbacks are in italics.)

Word count: 3293 words

It was really late at night and you just wanted to get your son to sleep. Him being only 3 months old, it was hard to get a consistent sleep schedule going, especially when you were sharing custody with someone who lives a completely different lifestyle than you.

After spending two nights with his father, your sons usual 10 minute bedtime routine turned into a long, drawn out, difficult ordeal, that you would be trying to correct for the next week. And once he was finally adjusted back to your routine, he was off to stay with his father again to continue the never ending cycle.

You rocked Reign in his chair for almost 40 minutes and finally settled him down enough to lay him back in his crib. You reached over to the changing table and turned the sound machine on, hoping that it would put him to sleep for even just a little while. You needed a break from the loud crying.

Walking over to the dresser sitting by the door, you grab the baby monitor and walked out towards the kitchen.

You mindlessly stared at your phone as you made your way down the hall. Distracted by your new notifications, you hadn’t noticed the handsome young man still sitting at your island waiting for you to return.

“Y/n/n”

“Oh my god, Matthew you scared me” you shouted, dropping your phone as your body jumped slightly from the shock of seeing someone unexpected in your apartment.

“I thought you left already, what are you still doing here” you continued as you picked your phone up off the ground, checking to make sure the screen wasn’t cracked.

You were caught off guard and slightly confused because Matt always left right after dropping your son off. You two had an arrangement that worked, minimal interaction that only revolved around your son. So when Matt was still lingering around your apartment almost and hour after dropping your son off, you couldn’t help but let your mind travel to the worst case scenario.

“Did something happen today with Reign?” You asked before he had a chance to respond to your first question.

You and Matt had a long history, dating for two years, until you guys “mutually” decided to split. It was civil-ish and seemed liked the best option at the time. But shortly after splitting, you found out you were pregnant with Reign and everything in your life, including your relationship with Matt, became more complicated.

“You should have been honest with me from the start then” you screamed at your boyfriend. You had been arguing for what felt like forever with no end in sight.

“I didn’t know what I wanted at the time y/n” he calmly responded “Fuck, I still don’t even know what I want, but I know its not fair to you, to keep going the way we are”. You two had been talking about where you see your relationship going in the future and this was the first time Matthew was really opening up to you.

As much as you begged Matt to express his emotions more over the course of your relationship, this time you wished he had kept them to himself.

“Y/n, you want to take the next step in this relationship and I’m not ready. I don’t know why I’m not ready but you are and I can’t hold you back.” Matthew sounded so sincere that you almost believed this was what you wanted too. “You need someone who is gonna take that step with you” key word was almost.

The past couple of weeks you had been hinting that you wanted to move in with Matt. You loved him and were sure you wanted to start the next chapter of your life with him. You never thought in a million years this would be his reaction but maybe you pushed him too much? Or maybe this was inevitable and he wasn’t looking at you as a long term investment. Whatever the reason, you now regretted even bringing it up.

“Okay, so two years down the drain I guess” you said as you rolled your tear filled eyes. His face fell at your words, he truly did love you and just wanted you to be happy. You were looking for forever and he admitted to not being ready for that kind of commitment. Instead of continuing a relationship that seemed to be at a stand still, the only option at this point was to end it. You weren’t going to sit there and beg him, you had too much pride to do that.

“I’ll just pack my shit and go” you walked past him to his bedroom to collect all the things that no longer belonged in his space. You almost expected him to follow after you, to fight for your relationship, but he didn’t, which hurt your heart even more. So you continued to pack up the things that had migrated from your apartment to his over the two years of being together. Your thoughts were now consumed with figuring out how you were going to move on and find someone to spend the rest of your life with, while he continued to live the bachelor lifestyle he was all so famous for.

Even though you rarely voiced it in your two years of being together, you were madly in love with him and broken hearted that he wasn’t willing to put in the effort to make your relationship work. You left his bedroom and made your way down the hallway, past the living room where Matthew was still sat, and out the front door with your bags in tow. You didn’t bother glancing back at him, out of fear you might do or say something you would regret.

2 weeks later…

You woke up and still hadn’t gotten your period. Your period had never been even a day late since you got it back in the 7th grade, so waking up for a 4th day in a row with no period, was worrisome. You didn’t think there was even a chance you were pregnant since you were on birth control, so you made an appointment with your gyno to ensure everything was okay. You were convinced it was just the stress of your recent breakup that was causing this irregularity in your cycle, but you couldn’t be sure without getting checked out first.

...

You pulled up to your doctors office for your appointment feeling extremely anxious. You just wanted to get it over with so you could stop stressing and go back to feeling sorry for yourself for getting broken up with.

You sat in the waiting room for what felt like an eternity. You scrolled through Instagram and somehow found yourself on Matthew’s page. It was definitely an unhealthy habit you had picked up since splitting. You couldn’t help it though, he was following new ig models everyday and in a sick way, you liked to compare yourself to them. It was a reminder that you weren’t what Matt wanted and Matt couldn’t be what you wanted anymore.

“y/n y/l/n” you looked up from your phone as your name was called “We’re ready for you”

You followed the nurse back to a bathroom located right next door to the exam room you usually got checked out in. The nurse handed you a cup to pee in, as you usually did at these types of appointments, and instructed you to change into a gown in exam room #2 once you finished up in the bathroom.

After you changed into the gown, the nurse came back to collect your sample and left you sitting on the exam table as you scrolled on your phone again, waiting for Dr. Cooper to come in.

“Y/n, congratulation you’re pregnant” Dr. Cooper walked in holding your charts. You had been going to Dr. Cooper since you were 16 and you had built a nice relationship through the years, talking about your personal lives and future plans during appointments. He was aware of your long term relationship with Matthew and by his enthusiastic tone and happy energy, it was clear that he was unaware of your recent breakup. You obviously didn’t expect him to know, the breakup was new and you only see him a couple times out of the year.

You couldn’t even process the news or anything else Dr. C had to say after that. Everything went fuzzy and it felt like you were in some crazy nightmare that you couldn’t wake up from. The only thing you did hear him say was that he expected you to be 8 weeks along from the information you told him and the ultrasound he performed.

You were a traditional person and always imagined you would be married or at least in a committed relationship before getting pregnant, so this entire situation had you in shock.

You were so numb from the news that you continued on throughout your day as normal, unsure of what else to do. But as you pulled into the parking lot of your apartment building, you rushed to get inside so you could finally breakdown and feel everything you had pushed aside for the past few hours.

You were silently praying your roommate wasn’t home when you walked through the door of your shared apartment so you didn’t have to face anyone. To your dismay, she was sitting in the living room calling for you when you walked through the door.

You hadn’t told her that you and Matthew broke up because you were so ashamed that the man you thought you’d spend the rest of you life with , didn’t feel the same way for you. The past 3 weeks you had been pretending Matt was away on a road trip or too busy with hockey to hang out whenever she asked about him. At this point you needed to get this off you chest so you walked right into the living room, sat down next to her, and unloaded the entire story before she even had the chance to say hello. As you spoke, her face turned from confusion to concern.

“Kay idk what to do, I don’t even want to tell him because I don’t need his help, but i feel icky when I think about having his baby and keeping it a secret.” You guys were talking through what you were gonna do about the situation.

Kaylee was the perfect person to ask because she also knew Matthew really well! Kaylee was the one who introduced you to Matt in the first place almost 3 years ago. They continually ran into each other while out at bars and talked so often they eventually became good friends. Being Kaylees best friend, you were later introduced to Matthew at a bar and you guys hit it off right away. You became really close friends and later started dating after a typical drunk love confession.

“And you’re definitely sure it’s Matt’s? Like there’s no chance it’s someone else’s right?”

“Yes of course I haven’t talk to anyone since the breakup, let alone slept with anyone!”

“I just want to make sure cause you didn’t even tell me you guys broke up, I wasn’t sure if I was missing any other important parts of the story” she paused for a second giving you a sympathetic look. The father was indisputable since you had only been with one man in the last two years.

“he’s a good guy y/n/n, I think he will be really understanding and a good father, it’s important you tell him, him and his family would want to know” She was right, she always is.

Before your talk with Kaylee, you fully prepared yourself to raise the baby on your own and expected nothing from Matthew. But when you thought about his family, a family that you had become a part of in the two years you were together, you couldn’t help but think of how disappointed they would be if they ever found out that you kept a part of them a secret. You had become extremely close with Brady and Taryn and their parents treated you like one of their own. They loved you and would unconditionally love your child, it wasn’t fair to them and more importantly, it wasn’t fair to your baby to keep them apart.

...

After a week of thoroughly thinking through all your options, you finally took Kaylees advice and reached out to Matt. You almost hoped he wouldn’t see your message or he would see it and just ignore it since you two hadn’t communicated since the breakup.

Y/n:

Hey Matty, it’s y/n, I’m not sure if you have free time in the near future but I kinda need to talk to you!

To your surprised he responded within minutes of your text.

Matty:

I’m happy you reached out, lets meet up! Can you do lunch tomorrow? Our usual lunch spot?

This all seemed too familiar, why was he texting you like you had never broken up and why did he respond at all? He could have easily said he was busy or trying to move on and didn’t want to talk, but he didn’t.

Y/n:

I was actually thinking we could do takeout or something and eat at my apartment?

You figure a private setting would be better for the news you were about to spring on him since you weren’t sure of the reaction you were going to get.

Matty:

Anything works babe

He had practice the next morning and a free afternoon so it was the perfect opportunity to tell him, giving him time to process since he had nothing going on for the rest of the day.

Matthew walked up to your apartment door the next day giving it his signature knock. You slowly walked to the door, opening it to find him standing there, carrying the to-go bags, filled with your favorite meal and wearing his perfect smile that almost made you forget why you called him over in the first place.

As you went to greet him, you caught a slight whiff of the food and the nausea that washed over you was so sudden and instantaneous, you almost didn’t make it to the bathroom.

On your run to the bathroom, you heard Matt’s footsteps following closely behind, but luckily you had enough time to lock the bathroom door before emptying the contents of you stomach in the toilet.

Matthew sat outside the bathroom knocking lightly “y/n are you okay” he waited patiently for your response.

When you felt the wave of nausea had completely passed, you stood up, flushing the toilet and making your way to the sink to rid your mouth of the taste that plagued it.

As you opened the door to the bathroom you were met with Matt’s concern filled face. If throughout your lunch date you wanted to change your mind about telling him, that option was completely off the table now. You had no choice but to explain what was going on and you just wanted to get it over with.

Matthew stood there staring, waiting for a response. “I’m pregnant” was all you could come up with.

He stared at you in complete disbelief but then realization washed over his face. “Who’s the father” was all he could manage, as if you would invite him over to tell him you were pregnant with someone else’s kid.

You wanted to roll your eye but they were so full of tears, you were scared that if you moved them, the tears would start running and you would fall apart in front of him.

“Yours” you whispered with a cold tone trying your best to keep your emotions at bay.

Matthew had alway wanted to be a dad and was great with his teammates kids, so you weren’t entirely surprised when he told you he wanted to be a part of your kids life.

You two spent countless hours and had countless lunch dates over the course of your pregnancy, talking about how you were going to co-parent and make everything work. You’d be lying if you said you didn’t secretly wish that you and Matt would end up back together, raising the family you always dream of having, but it seemed that ship had sailed for Matthew. His only concern was making sure his kid lived a happy and healthy life.

You were now waiting for a response from your ex on why he was still sitting in your kitchen so late at night.

“No no, Reign is fine everything is fine, I just need to talk to you about something” he said, not making eye contact with you. You were even more nervous now because you had no guess as to what he could possibly want to talk about.

“I’m talking to this girl” your entire world stopped spinning and your ears started to ring a little. You still weren’t use to Matthew talking to other women, you probably wouldn’t be for a long time, and now he wanted to talk to you about one of his hoes?

“Ummm okay” you said, unsure how you were even suppose to respond. “Why are you telling me this?”

“Things between us are getting a little more serious” you could literally feel you heart aching in your chest, but you continued to act unfazed by Matt’s admission. “I was just wondering what the appropriate time would be to introduce her to Reign”

You were almost stunned that he was even asking you such a stupid question. If it were up to you, Reign was never going to meet some trashy whore his father would bang every once in a while. Your son was only 3 months old, so to think that introducing him to a random, clout chaser was even an option for Matthew, made you extremely angry. Or maybe you were just jealous he had been seeing someone and it had gotten so serious that he was willing to introduce her to his newborn son.

You can’t even describe the feeling of the love of your life breaking up with you because ‘he wasn’t ready for commitment’, and then not even a year later he is in a serious relationship again but with someone else. You couldn’t help but think everything Matthew had told you was a lie, that he wasn’t afraid of committing, he was just afraid of committing to you.

“Y/n/n, did you hear my question?”

“Obviously” you spat “I just have to think, I wasn’t exactly prepared for this kind of question tonight or honestly at any point in the near future so I need time to think about it” you were bitter but you tried your hardest to not make it seem that way as you spoke.

“Take all the time you need, no rush, we’re obviously new to this whole parenting and co-parenting thing so we don’t have all the answers yet, but I don’t want to do anything you aren’t comfortable with.” He finally made eye contact with you for the first time all night. You forgot how pretty his eyes were.

“Thanks for checking in with me, ill let you know when I figure it out” and with that he got up and made his way out of your apartment.

“Goodnight y/n” he said as he opened the front door and pulled his car keys out of his pocket.

“Night” you responded as you close the door behind him. Just as the door closed, Reign’s screams came over the baby monitor, distracting you before you had too much time to think about how alone you actually were.

[bokukawas]

Drunken Mess

pairing; Kuroo Tetsuro  x Reader

warnings; alcohol, suggestive in the end, some grabbing from some random stranger

a/n; ok guys, enjoy, this took me forever to write and idk, i just hope someone here likes it ♥

summary; when you have a shitty day and then your boyfriend presses all the wrong buttons upon his return , you just need a little alcohol to keep your sanity… and maybe have a drink too much

word count; 6k, I actually planned to keep this short. WELL HUH jokes on me, right? 

The only thing that got you through the day was the thought, that when you came home later, your boyfriend would be back from his training camp with his team. Because, seriously, today had sucked. You had to take a double shift at work, because a colleague had called in sick and all the customers had just been annoying and rude. You had expected working in retail to suck, but compared to the reality your imagination was a fucking dream come true. Retail was the worst. The absolute fucking worst. And no one could truly understand it if they haven’t worked in retail at least once in their life.

By the time you could clock out, you were nearly crying from frustration. You were so eager to see Kuroo and leave your work; you nearly ran the whole way home.

When you finally arrived home, you could already see light seep out from under the door, which meant he actually was home already. Your heart made an involuntarily somersault as you pushed the door open and yelled “I’m home!” with a huge smile plastered on your face. You had missed him terribly. Yet instead of your boyfriends loving arms around you, you just found the mess he somehow managed to produce in less than a day. Your smile slipped just as fast as it had appeared. “Kuroo, what the actual fuck!?” No answer to that.

You could see him, lying on the couch, one leg slung over the back of it, controller in one hand, a piece of pizza in the other, headset on his head, while he cackled. He didn’t even seem to hear you. And damn it stung. You waited the whole day with dinner so you could eat together with your boyfriend. And not only that, you had cleaned the whole house before he returned, so you could just relax together once he was back, hell, you even dumped your friends who wanted to go out and have a girls night, and this was how it turns out?

With watering eyes, you inspected the spectacular mess in front of you. Eyes flicking from the kitchen, where he obviously already made ramen before he ordered pizza, to the living room where the whole content of his sports bag seems to just have been dumped on the floor. Then to the bathroom, where the door was open and showed the still wet tiles and a towel carelessly thrown in the middle of it, fog still clinging to the mirror, because he once again had not opened the goddamn window.

In that moment all you could feel inside of you, was burning anger and huge disappointment. It was not the first time you had asked him to just please be a little bit more considerate of you. Why didn’t he fucking get it? The damn flat didn’t magically clean itself; it was all you who did it. The mess he made in literally only a few hours felt like a punch in the face.

Clenching your fist, you angrily throw your bag into the mess he already made, which seemed to finally get his attention. Head popping up from the couch, he pulled down his headset a bit and looks over to you: “Oh hey kitten, didn’t hear you come home.”

“Yeah never mind”, you spit, “continue your thing there, I’m gonna be gone soon anyways.”

You slip out of your sneakers, phone already in your hand to call one of your friends.

“S’ something wrong, kitten?” Kuroo sets down his headset, mustering you with concern in his eyes. Obviously something was wrong, but his brain still felt foggy with exhaustion from all the training he had pushed himself and his team through this week.

The answer came in the slamming of the bedroom door, where you had disappeared.

He sighs and briefly puts his headset back on to give his friends a heads up: “Guys, I’ll be back later, seems like somethings wrong with Y/N”, then he left the game and stood up, slowly walking to your shared bedroom, before he tentatively knocks on the door.

“Y/n, what’s wrong? Did something happen at work? Are you alright?” Upon not getting an answer, he pushed down the latch, only to find that you had locked the door. He silently swears. It had to be bad when you actually locked him out. “C’mon hun, don’t be like that. Talk to me.” Door rattling followed, which you blatantly ignore.

You were sitting on the bed, which was, of fucking course, not made any more and stripped out of your work clothes, throwing them carelessly on the floor. The damage was already done, what bad could your few clothes be then, right?

It was then, that Miwa finally picked up. “Oh hey, Y/n, whats up? I thought you were having some quality time with Kuroo?” You could hear loud voices talking in the back; she must have gone outside to answer your call.

“Yeah you know what? I thought so, too. Plan has changed, though. Where are you? Mind if I join you? I need a drink.”

“Are you alright, Y/n? You sound a little upset?”

“Miwa, for god’s sake, just tell me where you are so I can join you. I’m going to explode if I stay here any minute longer.”

You could hear Miwa sigh into the phone. “That bad, huh? We’re at our usual place.”

“Good, I’ll be there in twenty.” You hang up and throw your phone into the pillow and start rummaging through your closet, finding one of the dresses you like very much, but never actually wear, because it is actually very short. Well, fuck it, you think to yourself and put it on, together with your new high heels. Quickly freshening up your smudged make-up, you grab your keys and your clutch and brace yourself for your escape. Because that was exactly what you were doing: escaping from this whole mess.

Then, you unlock the door and push it open, marching straight for the door, which was, of course, blocked by your boyfriend, who was leaning against it and now eyeing you from head to toe. He probably had heard you talk to Miwa and taken his position at the door right away. He did not comment on your outfit though, having the good sense to know he was walking on very thin ice.

“Going somewhere?”

“I’m going out with my friends. At least I would like to, but someone is standing in the way. Do you mind?” You look up at him and give him one of your perfect angelic smiles as you try to squeeze through. Even though you were wearing your heels, your boyfriend was a goddamn giant and he somehow managed to still be taller, which was mildly frustrating at the moment.

He does not budge; not even an inch.

“Are we not going to talk about what is going on? Because something clearly is going on.”

“I’d actually rather go right now.”

Kuroo could basically feel the passive aggressive energy radiating from you, but still, he didn’t budge. He didn’t even have the chance to talk to you yet, what could he possibly have done to upset you so much that you could not even stand to be in the same room as him? It was a mystery to him.

“Y/n, please.” He reaches out a hand to brush a thumb against your cheek, because he knows how much you always enjoy these little affectionate gestures, but he stops right in his tracks, when he found you staring at him with barely withhold anger. He was surprised that you did not swat at his still outstretched hand.

“Move Kuroo, I mean it.” And when you try to squeeze through this time, he lets you.

You were rarely in such a bad mood and he knew when he needed to let you cool off, first. As you walk by him, he catches your wrist in the last second, holding you still for a moment. “At least send me a text when you get there, alright?” he whispers while brushing his thumb once over your veins and then lifting your hand up to press a soft kiss against the palm of it.

The urge to just turn around and press your head into your boyfriends’ chest right then was overwhelming, but you were still so mad that you stubbornly continued on your way, leaving Kuroo standing there, watching you go.

When he turns around to go back into the flat, he feels like a train hit him as he takes in the mess he made. “Oh fuck.” He groans as he ruffles his spiky hair, because how could he be so stupid. Of course you would be mad if you came home to such a mess. The worst part was, that he didn’t even contain his chaos in one room, no, he seriously fucked up the whole flat, which by second thought, you had probably cleaned just hours before. “Fuck, fuck, fuck.”

Your foul mood suddenly made sense to him. Groaning again, he closes the door behind him and goes to the kitchen. He better gets rid of this whole mess before you come home later. But first, he wants to apologize. Fishing out his phone out of his joggers, he opens the chat with you and freezes all over again. There it was, black on white. Dinner later, Tetsu? We can order from your fav restaurant if you like ♥

Oh sweet fucking hell, he was the biggest douche in the whole wide world. How could he forget that you two wanted to eat together? “Ah shit.”

He types out a quick message to you. Y/n I’m so sorry. I’m the biggest idiot in the world. You can punch me later if you still feel like it. I sure as hell deserve it. Pls text me when you get there safely. I love you.

Kuroo really wants to kick his own ass in that moment. You were always so good to him, going out of your way to make the time you got to spend together as pleasurable as possible, taking time where you actually had none to spare and just simply spoiling him in any way possible and this was how he treated you? He didn’t even kiss you when you got home, which was funny, because it was one of the only thoughts in his head, besides volleyball this whole past week. The feeling of your soft lips against his.

He was not surprised that he didn’t get a message back, but he still unmuted his phone, just in case you called him when you had enough and wanted to go home.

Then he starts cleaning up his mess.

You on the other hand nearly arrived at the bar where you and your friends usually met up once a month to keep in touch. You already regretted wearing your new heels. As you turned the next corner, you could already spot the bar and with it, a whole lot of people standing outside at high tables. Your friends amongst one of them.

“Hey ladies”, you call out as you get closer. “Long time no see.”

Fighting a smile to your face, you found your place right next to Miwa, who gently nudges you in the side.

“Stop that grimace and tell us what happened.”

Alisa, who was standing in front of you, just reaches over the table, takes your hand in hers and squeezes it softly.

“Actually, I think I’d rather have a drink first”, you moan.

One drink followed the next and your friends realized later, that they probably should have stopped you after your 5th cocktail or so. Which they didn’t, because you spilled your heart out to them, nearly crying a few times, which was rare to see, because usually you managed to keep your cool in front of others, even your own friends. Moreover, the drink in your hand seemed to be the only thing holding you together. They were a little taken aback, too, because you usually were a very good drinker, and could handle alcohol very well; but by the time you went inside to dance and just bumped into stranger after stranger while trying to walk a straight line, they figured you probably had not eaten anything before coming here.

Miwa squinched up her face. “She’s gonna feel even worse tomorrow. We should probably get her home.”

Alisa just nods, before sprinting in your direction as she witnessed you tumbling into a group of men, of which one luckily caught you in his arms, before you hit the floor, but then couldn’t keep his hands to himself. You just laughed, not realizing what was going on and not feeling the hand, currently sneaking up your leg. Everything looked dizzy and swayed and you felt a little funny in the head. Vaguely you realize that Alisa was arguing with the man who stopped your fall and then her face popped up in front of you, asking you were your phone was.

You look at her irritated, not quite understanding what she wanted.

“C’mon y/n, where is your goddamn phone.”

“My clutch?”

Miwa suddenly popped up next to you, steadying you and gently guiding you to an abandoned empty chair. “Sit.”

Alisa rummaged through your clutch, only to find your purse and your house keys…but no phone.

“Your phone is not in here y/n. Are you sure it was in your clutch?” she looks at you questioningly, with her big green eyes, which were all you could focus on. She always looks so pretty.

„Focus y/n!“

You thought back to when you left the flat… “I think I …left it on the bed”, you mumble, eyes suddenly growing very heavy. Leaning heavily against Miwa, your head lolls against her shoulder. You inhale deeply. Miwa always managed to smell so good; you wonder how she does it. The girls just shared a concerned look. You couldn’t even sit upright on that damn chair, how were they supposed to get you home.

“We need to call Kuroo”, Miwa states, while brushing some strands of hair out of your face. You didn’t seem to notice.

“That was my plan. But I don’t have his number… do you?” Miwas face was answer enough. That’s when Saeko popped up next to them. “Hey girls, I made it after all.” She grinned happily at all of you. “What’s wrong with this one here, though?” She nudges you in the side, which was rewarded with a lazy grunt from you and a silent curse from Miwa as you tipped dangerously to the side.

“Is she drunk!? I don’t think I’ve ever seen her drunk. What happened?” Saeko seemed mildly concerned, which leads to Miwa and Alisa freaking out a little. Saeko usually doesn’t show concern, so it must be just as bad as they imagined.

“Do you have Kuroos number?” Alisa asked her without answering her question in return, not letting her eyes stray from your face, as you looked ghostly white at the moment and started mumbling random things under your breath.

“No? But you have? Right?”

They both shake their heads. Saeko sighs and mumbles something under her breath, which rather sounded, like ‘I should’ve just gone straight home’, before facing Alisa.

“Call your brother then. He must have his number.”

“Oh my god, Saeko you are a genius.”

“Thanks, I know.”

With another concerned look your way, Alisa left your side to go outside and call her brother. She just hoped he would pick up, since it was already the middle of the night.

Meanwhile Kuroo was sitting on the couch, worriedly glancing at the clock all few seconds and constantly brushing his fingers through his hair. No wonder you hadn’t texted him back, he had found your phone lying on his pillow as he had made the bed again. This meant, you were out, with no phone and no means to contact him if something was wrong. He didn’t like that one bit. The worst part was that he couldn’t even blame someone for it, besides himself. This was his fault and he knew it all too well. Scratching at his scalp, he tried to calm down a bit. He knew you could take care of yourself; your small figure belied the strength you actually had, but still. There was always a chance that something happened. So when his phone started ringing he answered it in seconds, without even looking who was calling first. It just had to be you, right?

“Y/n?” he nearly yelped in the phone.

“No, this is Lev.”

Kuroo nearly lost it then, breathing heavily and punching the pillow right next to him, he thought he was going to combust any second.

“What is it Lev? It’s the middle of the night!”

“Yeah, I know, I was sleeping until my sister called me.” Now that he mentioned it, Kuroo could hear the slight strain in Levs voice, as if he had just gotten up.

“It’s about y/n, though. They are worried and would like you to come and pick her up. Apparently she didn’t have her phone with her and got stupidly drunk.” He paused. “…did you have a fight? Are you alright?”

Kuroo swallowed.

“Just tell me where they are, please.” And so Lev does.

“Tell your sister I’ll be there soon… and thank you, Lev. Sorry that you got involved in this.”

“Yeah, yeah. G’night.” with that, he just hung up on Kuroo, probably eager to get into bed again. Kuroo couldn’t even blame him for that, he was tired, too, but he swore he wouldn’t go to bed before you got home safely.

He gets up, just grabs his wallet, keys and his sweater and was out the door in seconds, running all the way to the bar. Never before had it been so bad, that your friends were concerned about you. You had always gotten home on your own, or were sober enough to just give him a call, or get a taxi. Your alcohol tolerance was quite high, too, but alas, you hadn’t eaten today. That was probably the problem.

Alisa spotted him from afar and just starts waving. She was impressed at how fast he was, it hadn’t even been 10 minutes since the call. When she saw him up close though, she realized that he was sweating and breathing hard. He must have run the whole way here.

“Jeez, Kuroo you look like you might pass out any second.”

“Thanks, it’s nice to see you, too Alisa. Now, where is she?”

He didn’t even look Alisa in the face, his eyes scanning the crowd around them, searching for your face.

“Inside. C’mon.”

He follows her tall blonde form through the masses, until she stops in front of a chair. An empty chair. He could barely hear her curse under her breath.

Kuroos head snaps up, when he could hear a commotion start on the dance floor.

There you were, the hands of some random stranger draped across you, while you danced as if you didn’t even notice. Which of course, you didn’t. Not really. You just enjoyed the lights and the music and silently swayed to the rhythm of it, being a little surprised that the world suddenly didn’t seem so shaky anymore. Your back felt warm, too, which was at the same time pleasant and very unpleasant at once. Something somehow felt wrong, but you couldn’t pinpoint what it was. You were just happy that you somehow managed to get yourself drunken enough, to stop thinking about how little your boyfriend seemed to care about you.

Kuroos eyes wander to the two females next to you, desperately trying to pry the hands off that damn stranger of your dancing form, but they were both so small compared to the guy, it was useless.

He lost it the moment said stranger seemed to thrust his hips into your back. Miwa and Saeko spotted him just the second he lunged at the person, shoving him away.

“Get your filthy hands off of my girlfriend!”

The guy of course didn’t like being handled that way and was in Kuroos face the very next instance. “What’s your problem man? It didn’t seem to me that she didn’t like it.”

Miwa winced. She had seen Kuroo lose his cool once before, and it hadn’t ended very well for the other dude. He had him up by his collar at once, sneering in his face “she’s so drunk she probably doesn’t even remember her own name and you want to tell me she liked it?” He shook the stranger, muscles flexing under his T-Shirt.  “Get the fuck out of my eyes.”

With that, he shoves him so hard that the guy loses his balance and falls face down onto the dance floor.

Your world had become very wobbly again, as soon as the somewhat steadying hands had left your hips. Tumbling to the side, you were caught in strong arms again. Your boyfriend’s arms.

“C’mon kitten, we’re going.”

“Wha-? Kuroo?” Were you hallucinating now? “No I don’t want to go. I want to dance.” You wind your way out of his arms, only to stagger once again.

Kuroo exhales once again and tries to pull himself together, looking at your friends who all watch you with deep worry in their eyes. “How much exactly did she drink?”

Alisa nervously twirls her hair around her finger, not wanting to look him in the eyes. Your boyfriend could be scary, especially if he was worried about you. “Don’t know… I kinda lost count after her 5th cocktail or so… she might have had some drinks on the dance floor, too.”

Kuroo breathes in deeply, watching you as you tried to dance, which was actually just staggering from one side to the other, trying not to fall on your face. He was low key impressed that you had not already broken your ankles in those heels. Trying to remain calm and reminding himself that in fact, this was his fault and he couldn’t get angry with anybody else, he sighs again, starts fumbling in his pocket to get his wallet out and pushes some money in Alisas hand.

“Here, for her drinks. I’m pretty sure she didn’t pay for them herself, did she? Well, never mind. We are going now. Thanks for reaching out to me.”

And with that, he appears next to you again, draping his sweater around your hips to keep your very short dress from flashing anyone, before crouching down and just throwing you over his shoulder.

“Hey, what the hell!? KUROO! Put me down, I don’t want to go!” you slur, as he starts to push his way through the crowd.

“Good thing I’m not asking then.”

Your friends watch as your boyfriend singlehandedly maneuvers you two outside, sighing in unison as you leave the club.

“Wow. That was intense”, Saeko deadpans.

Miwa nods. “He was so calm, though? The last time I saw someone touch y/n with Kuroo around, the guy had a broken nose afterwards. I was a little scared for a second there.”

“He must have been really worried. Lev told me he seemed really agitated, which is rare for him. He’s usually very composed.”

They sigh in unison again. “We better call her tomorrow and ask if she’s alright”, Miwa states, to which the others all nod. Saeko starts grinning a moment later. “I’m pretty sure Kuroo is gonna take good care of her now, so let’s not worry. The night is still young.” She throws her arms around the waists of her friends and pulls them all in direction of the dance floor.

 Meanwhile your world shakes violently with every step your boyfriend makes and your hair was jumping in tact with it. His shoulder blade pressed very uncomfortably into your stomach. You could feel the warmth radiating from his hand at the back of your knee, where he gripped you softly to keep you steady.

You hadn’t spoken to him since he had thrown you over his shoulder and just marched out of the bar. In fact, you felt a little ashamed. It had been years since you had gotten so drunk you could barely stand. It was a mystery to you, how he even knew where you were.

Another step, another bounce, another uncomfortable press against your roaring stomach. You clutch your hands into the hem of Kuroos shirt, trying to steady yourself a bit, inhaling his familiar smell and focusing on that, instead of the turmoil in your stomach and your head.

Kuroo of course feels you clench fistfuls of his shirt and slows down a bit, throwing a glance over his shoulder. “Kitten, you alright there?”

The fresh air had sobered you up quite a bit and you were fully aware of the gentle grip your boyfriend had on you, same as the every so often brush of his thumb across your thigh.

Since you didn’t answer, he just presses a quick kiss to your leg and then continues on his way, a little more slowly, but still persistent. You groan, as the nauseous feeling in your stomach got overwhelming. Not only that, but you could also feel your feet burning and hurting. Those heels were really not the best choice for tonight.

“Y/n?” he stops once more and tries to look over his shoulder again.

“First of all Kuroo, I’m still mad at you, secondly I feel like I might puke any minute if your shoulder is gonna press in my stomach again and last of all, my feet hurt.”

It occurred to you that you were whining, but how could you not? Today has been hell and now everything hurts and you couldn’t even just press your head into your boyfriends’ chest because you were supposed to be mad at him.

“Hold on a sec, hun.”

“I mean it Tetsu, I’m gonna puke.”

Kuroo smiles at that, not because it was fun to him that you had so much to drink that you felt like puking, but because you used his first name…which in conclusion meant you weren’t in fact as mad as you tried to be.

He could already see his target at the end of the street, so he just ignored you and walks on a few minutes longer.

“Ok, I’m going to put you down now, be ready.”

He slowly lets you slide down on his front, so that you were now standing in front of him. His hands were on your hips, steadying you slightly in case you still needed it. You wince as your feet hit the ground, your heels pressing against every sore spot on them. Kuroo could tell you were avoiding looking in his face, even though he stood right in front of you.

Sighing, he puts his slender index finger under your chin and lifts your head up, so you had no choice but to look at him. “I’m sorry Y/n, I was a total dick earlier and I didn’t even realize it. But for now, can we ignore that so that I can take care of you properly? Please?”

Damn it, it wasn’t fair. As you look into his catlike, earnest eyes, so full of love and concern for you, you could already feel your anger melt away. “You’re the worst, Tetsu.” Your words significance was betrayed by the fact that you leaned your head against his shoulder the exact same instance and inhaled deeply. He chuckles deeply at that and presses a soft kiss against your neck, holding you a little while longer.

“Sit down here for a bit kitten, I will be right back.” He guides you to a bench right in front of the 24/7 he had aimed for, noticing you were still very unsteady on your feet and actually limping now. After you sat down, he squats down in front of you and takes your foot in his hands. “Let me see.” He slowly peels off your shoes and inhales sharply through his teeth. “Damn hun, you really butchered your feet.” You decided you didn’t even want to see it and just wriggled your toes at the new found freedom.

“Yeah, I’ll be right back”, and with that he rushes into the store behind you.

After a few minutes, you feel something cold against your cheek. “Here, drink.”

You take the bottle of water out of his hands, suddenly feeling very thirsty and drink a few mouthfuls, as he squats down in front of you again, inspecting your feet once more, before applying patches at the worst spots. When he was finished, he just looks up at your exhausted form in front of him, bracing his hands on your knees, his thumbs already drawing gentle patterns across your skin. It seemed cold to you suddenly and you shiver, which leads to Kuroo taking off the sweater he had put around your waist and pulling it over your head.

“C’mon, let’s get you home.” He grabs your shoes, and turns around, squatting again in front of you, his back muscles flexing under the shirt as he motions for you to get on. With a sigh you did exactly that. No way in hell would you walk the next 10 minutes home on your own two feet. You put your arms around his neck and try a weak little jump to get on his back, which was rewarded with an amused chuckle by your boyfriend. Luckily, he caught your legs just fine and adjusted you on his back with a little wiggle, so that he now could give you a proper piggyback ride home.

“Y/n?” he asks as you got closer and closer to your home, already walking up the stairs to your shared flat.

“Hm?”

“I love you.”                            

Ah damn that bastard really knew how to play you. Even though you could feel your insides warm up at that, you thought he could feel bad a little more, so you didn’t comment on it, as he puts the key in the locker and opens the door.

The moment he switched the light on, though, you couldn’t hold back anymore.

“Ah fuck Tetsu, I love you, too. Asshole.” That made him laugh in return. It seems like he had cleaned the whole flat after you rushed out to drink yourself stupid.

“I realized why you were so mad the moment I turned around to go back in here”, he confesses and slowly lets you down from his back. “And as I said before, I’m sorry. I’m really sorry. I was a total douchebag.” He comes to stand in front of you and puts your face into his hands. “Can you forgive this asshole?”

You punch his chest in return. “Stop being cute!”

“Can you forgive me? Pleaseee?”

He actually pouts as he squishes your cheeks, already knowing he had won. You tried to fight the smile that wanted to spread on your face at the ridiculous show of your huge boyfriend pouting in front of you, but you fail miserably.

“Just kiss me already, idiot.”

So he did, his one hand sliding from your cheek to your neck, as his lips press against yours in a feather light touch. Your own hand finds its way into his hair at once, pulling him closer and deepening the kiss, as the other steadies you against his hips. He sighs contentedly in the kiss, brushing his lips against yours as he mumbles “I missed you so much”, before kissing you again, this time a little more hungrily. Your lips move eagerly against each other and after a little while, you feel his tongue grace against your lips, which makes you shudder. Your knees started feeling dangerously wobbly again. Luckily, he had already pulled you flush against him and now lifted you up by putting his hands under your ass to carry you to the bedroom, where he gently lays you down on the bed, before slowly climbing on top of you.

You smile fondly at his expression as he kisses you repeatedly, every kiss getting a little rougher than the last one, moving your lips in time with his and then there was his tongue, finally in your mouth. He could still taste the alcohol on your lips.

When he finally breaks away from you, you were both panting. Your hands were gripping his shirt greedily and you were already pulling him down on you again, wanting more. God his kisses gave you life.

“I’m not sure we should go there today, kitten, as much as I’d like to. You’re still very much drunk, and I’d like you to feel and remember all of what I plan to do to you.”

He smirks and plants another kiss on your lips, teeth grazing teasingly against them as he did so, then snorting at the bewildered and somewhat outraged look you gave him when he pulled away. You were clawing at his biceps the moment he starts to get up from you, trying to pull him down again and groaning when you realized you were going to lose against his strength.

“Tetsuro”, you moaned in a last attempt to get him back to you, which made him freeze on the spot. “Wow you’re mean, kitten, but still no.”

And with that, he simply helps you get out of his sweater and your dress, always swatting your grabbing hands away, before he manhandles you into the bathroom to get you ready for bed.

You were getting pissed at him again, because first, he got you hot and bothered and then he didn’t want to do something about it. How rude. That would get him payback, you swore to yourself.

Still, not even your naked form had him thinking twice about his choice, he simply wrangles one of his tees over your head and pulls you flush against him in your shared bed, having a death grip on you, so you couldn’t even move around, as much as you tried.

“Sleep now kitten, and then maybe tomorrow I’ll give you what you want so desperately right now.”

He runs a hand down your side teasingly and you could feel his smile against your forehead at the way your body quivers against him.

“On second thought, I think I’m not able to forgive you yet, you are actually the worst”, you mumble against his chest. He only acknowledges this with another kiss against your forehead. Still, somehow your boyfriend had made the right call, because it only took you seconds to fall asleep in his warm embrace. 

He watches your sleeping form on his chest fondly, pressing little kisses to your face from time to time and thinking to himself, that he deserves a price for self-control, because he seriously had not wanted to restrain himself at all.

Groaning, he presses another kiss to your face as he sleepily mumbles, “I love you, Y/n.” before squishing you even more against his chest. This was what he had longed for all week after all, he thought to himself, as he tried to ignore the bulge in his pants. This was going to be an extremely long and very torturous night for him… he just hopes he would fall asleep just as fast as you did. Morning could not come fast enough…

[eloquentposture]

Hey so I had someone on twitter ask me to cross post my roger and Blair headcanons onto here and like a week later I’m here to do it! I will add some more for making them wait too. These were also posted on twitter under @/chiidofearth so enjoy:

-I’ve talked about it in mo money quite a bit but Roger is a huge hockey fan. Loves hockey games and going to them he just loves the energy and the vibes of hockey games and how rowdy it gets

-naturally the type of person who goes out of his way to make sure other people are doing ok. He’s just the person when you’re having a hard time you go to cause he gives good advice and is always willing to listen

-twilight fan

-words of affirmation asf! I wrote a whole story basically about his love language which I will be posting soon but he expresses himself very well through words. When he’s sad he’ll write letters to Blair about how much he loves him to make himself feel better

-he isn’t the biggest physical touch person but once he’s comfortable with the person (Blair) he’s all over them as much as Blair is

-book lover straight up he always has a book he’s reading at all times and will give Blair the rundown of each story once he’s finished so he can talk about it

-tea drinker his favorite tea is peppermint

-in school is subject was English he can effortlessly write essays and often wrote essays for Blair

-he easily gets down on himself and finds it hard to fight for himself sometimes but Blair is just fiery enough to get him to fight for himself when others are wronging him

-he really did feel stuck in his life til Blair showed up and he didn’t realize how much he needed him until Blair was there. Blair is not like anyone Roger has ever associated with and at first that sense of danger is what allured him but over time as he got to know Blair it wasn’t that danger feeling anymore it that pulled him in it was Blair helping him change to live life less by the book and more so how he truly wants to live. Idk if that makes any sense but Blair inspired him to be more to people than his public image that he uses as a defense of people judging the real him

-that one got a little sad um his favorite book he tells people is Picture of Dorian gray but secretly he really enjoys the books in the perspective of a stalker you know the ones

-loves otters the animal not the body

-also loves raccoons cause they’re funny and him and Blair cried over the video of the raccoon washing the cotton candy

-I’ve said it in a different thread but he’s a vegetarian I think cause of a traumatic incident involving chicken on the bone

-stealing Blake’s hc but back sleeper

-I think he has played either the piano or cello classically or both

-Roger will play his cello every once in a while and every time blair comes and hugs him from behind as he plays and he just laughs cause Blair is in the way now but he tries to keep playing whatever he is

-can play by ear so he plays Blair’s favorite songs for him all the time

-a bit of a hopeless romantic and he believes in true love but before Blair he just didn’t think he’d ever get to experience it. Hint after he meets Blair he feels like he finally has

-a true believer that everything happens for a reason and that every person finds others for a reason and he writes a lengthy letter to Blair one day about how important it was to him tbat Blair found him when he did and how much he needed him and how grateful he is for Blair helping him change into who he is today

-he doesn’t believe in a higher power but more believes things happen for a reason

-maybe I should write letters to Blair from Roger’s POV that’s a good idea

-Blair calls him out real quick on putting up a front for everyone and he’s like damn ok.

-I have this more in depth in a au but Roger’s relationships often fizzle out because he’s too scared of being his real self with people and is terrified of expressing his emotions to others and so his partner never feels like they actually know him but with Blair he feels this pull to want to be himself it’s hard to describe but with Blair he says things and expresses things no one knows about him

-neck kisses in an affectionate way not a sexual way also will Blair’s forehead quite a bit just when they’re chilling

-on the down low likes true crime

-one last thing actually he really loves golf because it’s the type of sport where you have to have a clear mind and let all your anger and frustration go to perform well at so it’s cathartic to him and he likes watching hockey cause he can be fucking ANGRY

-Last one cause I have to leave now but this is a completely self indulgent hc and be ready cause I will do a one shot soon but Roger closing cashier at a sketchy grocery store linden is this because you are a closing cashier at a sketc- gets shot

-ok one more but surprisingly to a lot of people he’s a very very creative person and he keeps it on the down low but musically, artistically, and with writing he’s very very creative and good at those types of things and it shocks people when they find out

Now for some extra ones I’m gonna think up real quick for you you blessed tumblr user you:

-this one is Blythe’s but Roger is hypersensitive to light touch when he’s sick so Blair will have to put all his weight on him and it makes Roger feel a lot better

-Blair is really good at baking and will often bake things for Roger at like 2 am and one night it wakes Roger up and roger comes down and starts helping and that leads to Blair just hugging roger from behind while roger stirs shit

-Blair makes roger coffee all the time and just leaves it on the counter for when he wakes up

-Blair has a hard time waking up in the mornings and when roger wakes him up in the mornings he has to wake him up an hour earlier so Blair has time to keep rolling over and cuddling Roger and going back to sleep

-Blair slow dances with Roger’s dog

I might add to this later but that’s all I can think of right now!

[ibangmilfs64]

men r stinky😡😡

summary: you have fallen for UA’s resident feral gremlin and think that your feelings are unrequited, but are they ?

tags: katsuki bakugou x gn reader, angst but like with a happy ending idk, overall garbage writing

It’s days like today that are the worst. Days where the sky is a dull shade of gray and the clouds can no longer hold the rain that falls over your head as you go running for shelter. Days where you can physically feel the dense melancholy energy weighing down the air around you. It’s hard to not feel sad on days like this, and it’s so easy to give in to your negative thoughts. Maybe that’s why I’m sitting alone in my dorm room covered in blankets trying to keep my mind from wandering to places It doesn’t need to be. ‘god I’m such an idiot’ I think as I change my position so I’m now hanging upside-down over the edge of the bed. I know I’m young, I know that I haven’t ever really gotten the chance to love someone, but god I’ve felt heartbreak. My only experiences with “love” have all been failures. There was Sam in 6th grade, she was my best friend and by the time I realized that my feelings went beyond friendship she had gotten a boyfriend. I remember watching them at lunch and feeling so angry at the time, but I moved on. Then there was Jay in 8th. I bumped into him at a movie theater that I frequented with my friends, I thought it was fate. I only knew him for a week but I was infatuated. When I told him I liked him he laughed in my face. Now here I am moping around in my room about some stupid spiky-haired boy with serious anger issues. It’s not my fault that I like him, and I honestly have no idea how it happened, I met him at the UA entrance exam and he was just so amazing. The way he moved was just so mesmerizing, and then when I found out we were in the same class, god I fell so fast. On our first day of school I made friends with Sero and Denki, and then later Mina and Kiri...and him, even though sometimes it doesn’t feel like it. It’s so hard because I know that he doesn’t normally like people but he just always seems so cold to me. Sometimes I wonder if maybe I said something to him or if maybe I did something to piss him off, but now it seems like maybe it wasn’t something I said or did, maybe it’s just me. I let myself fall to the floor, taking my blankets with me. I always complain about how hard it is to be in love with Katsuki Bakugou, but honestly it’s so easy. I genuinely don’t think there’s a thing I don’t love about him, except for the fact that he doesn’t love me back. I love everything about him. I love his passion. I love the way that he never half asses anything he does. I love how much he cares about his friends, even though he would never admit that. I love how stubborn he is. I love his face, his name. “GOD!” I yell before curling up into a ball and pulling my blankets over my head, letting the tears fall slowly from my face. Loving Bakugou was easy, him not loving me back was the hard part. I heard a knock on the door, pulling me from my thoughts I quickly stand up and wipe off my tears with the sleeve of your hoodie. I open the door and am met with a very concerned looking Mina. “y/n! What’s wrong?” she exclaimed as she barged into my room and led me to my bed. “It’s nothing, I promise. What do you need?” She looked you over a few times, now definitely being able to take in my glossy eyes and disheveled appearance. “Well...I was going to ask if you wanted to come watch movies with me and the guys” she pauses and looks me over again “but, if you’re not feeling up to it I totally understand!” she pulls me into a tight hug and runs her hands through my hair. “I don’t know what’s wrong, but if you ever need anything you can always talk to me” you wrap your arms tightly around her “thank you for understanding, Mina. I can go with you guys I just need a few minutes” I chuckle awkwardly at the end. I wipe my eyes and quickly try to fix my hair. “there” I say once I’m satisfied with my appearance. Mina grabs my hand and we walk out of my dorm and make our way to the common room. 

‘okay so maybe I shouldn’t have come after all’ I thought to myself as I sat in my spot next to Bakugou playing with my thumbs. I turn my head away from the screen to look at him only to find him already staring at me. He quickly looks away and stares intensely at the tv trying to play it off. ‘See, this is exactly what I’m talking about, it’s like he can’t even look at me!’ I quickly sit up from my spot on the couch and walked to the kitchen under the guise of getting more popcorn. “fuckfuckfuck” I muttered to myself while frantically wiping my eyes. “Oi, dumbass! What’s wrong with you?” I heard a familiar loud hothead call out to me. ‘shit’ I quickly plastered a smile on my face and cleared my throat. “n-nothing” I said trying and failing to sound somewhat normal. I sat there for a moment just glaring at the kitchen counter until i was suddenly turned around and pulled into someone’s chest. “w-what are you doing!” i yelled out. suddenly, i felt all my sadness wash away and turn into anger. after all of the indifference he has shown me, now he wants to be nice. “i was comforting you dumbass!” he yelled back at me. “well i don’t need your comfort, asshole!” i glared at him. “you-you never look at me, you never speak to me! i have been practically begging for your attention all fucking year and now you wanna show me it! what happened! what changed!” the words left my mouth before i could stop them, but once i got them out i felt worse. i had basically just confused to katsuki fucking bakugou in a fucking kitchen while looking like a goblin with ugly tears streaming down my face. embarrassment suddenly washed over me and i decided i’d rather be anywhere else then in this stupid kitchen with the guy i’ve liked for so long staring at me like i’m an alien or something. “i gotta go” i said and attempted to get past him but he was blocking the way out. “let me out asshole!” i tried pushing past him but it was no use, he was like a giant, spiky rock. “can you at least listen to what i have to say idiot?” he yelled glaring down at me. i scoffed and looked at my feet “whatever”. “i like you” my breath hitched and i looked up at him with wide eyes. “i didn’t know what to do so i tried to ignore it...and you, but for some reason the more i ignored it the worse it got and then i got this shitty feeling in my chest and i got sick of it so i went to shitty hair and he told me that i had to ‘man up and ask you out’ so him and raccoon eyes set up this stupid movie night to try to get me to ask you out”. you felt your heartrate accelerate at every word he said. this is the most serious you’ve ever seen him, but are you really gonna forgive him after all that heartbreak just because of some shitty little speech?......yes. no. maybe? “you know that doesn’t make up for how you treated me, right” you said sternly. “yeah, maybe i can take you out or something to make up for it or whatever” he said rubbing the back of his neck and looking anywhere but at you. okay maybe the whole tsundere thing is kinda cute when he’s not completely shutting you out. “i would love that” you smiled up at him and then got an idea. “but you know what would make it better” you looked at him with mischief clear in your gaze. “what do you want dumbass” in response you just puckered up your lips at him and he rolled his eyes but pulled you close to him and pressed his forehead against yours. “i really do like you, dumbass” he said before tilting your chin up and capturing your lips in a passionate kiss. after what felt like forever you pulled away, panting and looked up at him with red cheeks. he brought his hand up to your face and swiped his thumb over your cheek. “cute.” he said and then pulled you in for another kiss that was quickly cut off by a loud thud from outside the kitchen. bakugou quickly pulled away and looked outside and found a very frantic kiri, denki, mina, and sero staring up at him with wide eyes. “YOU IDIOTS ARE DEAD” he boomed.

sjrjgjgkkgjgkgkskakajajdhfhfjfjfjfhf i didn’t proofread this so i’m sorry if it is dookie. also i started this on my laptop but finished it on my phone so that’s why everything is lowercase at the end smh

[selsprompts]

Who’s the best boyfie?

Insight; This is literally a shit post idk what this is okay- I basically wanted to do some boyfriend headcanons with my best boys Kuroo and Bokuto because why not??

This is literally all over the place pls don’t come for me.

Characters; Tetsurō Kuroo & Kōtarō Bokuto 

Warnings; cursing & erm there’s implied smut so read at your own risk mkay ghouls and gals tyty

Kuroo<3

oh gosh my favourite boy!!

Lots of hugs and kisses regardless of where you are this mf does not CARE.

but will be respectful infront of elders (ofc)

Loves to mark you up (hickeys ect)

He is definitely a physical boyfriend in every sense of the word

He comes off as the blunt type, definitely won’t beat around the bush when he wants something from you but will tease.

“Kitten, stop doing your work and come cuddle with me”

“Not right now Tetsurou”

“You’ve been studying for 3 hours just take a break”

“Oh yeah and do what?”

“I mean that chair looks a little uncomfortable, I have a better one right here”

Cocky bitch 101

You’ll be like ???

And he’ll be smirking licking his lips and then you catch his drift because he meant his face.

Soz back to cute stuff I’m—

He likes to buy you over the top things for special occasions.

this doesn’t mean he doesnt buy you things for non-special occasions.

it means that he puts more effort into Christmas, birthday and anniversary gifts.

Like this guy is ALWAYS doing the most just to show you how special you are no matter how much you think you aren’t.

He loves you to death and loves to show you off.

Shows you off infront of his friends especially so they can get jealous.

“Oya Oya that’s my baby, you look so good today”

“Yeah, yeah I know”

“Oh you know?”

“Yes?”

“You hear that Kenma? Y/n ALREADY knows!!”

Kenma is like 0_0 but he will compliment you saying you look nice

Kuroo likes to spend lunch with you, basically any of his spare time outside of vollyball and studying, that time is reserved for you.

It doesn’t bother him much because he sees his friends during classes and majority of them are in vollyball anyways.

WILL. FLIRT. WITH. YOU. IN. CLASS.

He will send you notes and purposely tease you (maybe try to get you in trouble)

“Hey y/n take the note”

“nO Kuroo I’m going to get in trouble”

“Come I’m just this one time-”

“KUroo no-”

“Excuse me, Mr/Ms Y/n, am I interrupting your conversation?”

“No Miss”

“Mmm”

“I’m gonna kill you Kuroo”

“ehehe”

Now he can tell you about how you need to be punished later for making such a big mistake.

Kuroo is top. He will switch if that’s what you really want but majority of the time he’s top.

Kuroos way or the fucking highway 8)

Type of bf to text you at 2am asking to FaceTime till he falls asleep and you comply

Sends you memes that you two can laugh about next time you see eachother.

Sends futuristic memes (as in things that would happen in the future between you to)

*Marriage memes*

Loves to help you do whatever you need.

He hates seeing you struggle when it’s not underneath him

Makes fun of your height if you’re shorter than him CONSTANTLY

“Hey short stuff, how’s the grass?”

if you’re taller he will be lowkey jealous that he has to look up to you.

“Hey, if it isn’t my long legged kitty, come down from up there”

Loves you regardless of what you look like honestly.

Loves you for the mindset you have and the person YOU ARE.

Kuroo is the type to fall INLOVE with someone’s way of life and how they choose to live it.

King shit all the time pls you are his King/Queen.

You ARE royalty in his eyes and deserve nothing but the best, no more no less.

Will reassure his love when need be. It’s cute because he doesn’t do it often.

10/10 boyfriend will definitely share the bed.

You’re usually little spoon but when he’s cranky and loses a match, he won’t say it but you’ll just know that he wants to be held so you be the big spoon:’)

Bokuto<3

okay off the bat this MF IS SO HYPER MY GOD-

will want your attention 24/7.

always has to make sure you’re safe.

he’s so cute when you ignore him purposely especially over text,

“Hey baby”

*read*

“Helloooo y/n”

*read*

“noe what did I do pls tell me🥺”

babie hotline 101.

wbk he super emo so when you do stuff like that he’s in babie mode.

will always answer your texts ASAP.

V supportive of anything you do 100%.

He is the physical boyfriend but is a tiny bit more modest in public and likes to keep it respectful infront of elders/superiors.

Loves to hug you from behind so he can pop his head on your shoulder and look at you from the side like ;).

he will say he loves you all the time just cause he wants you to know.

this goes for in person and over text,

“Hey y/n”

“Yeah Bokuto?”

“I love you”

“That was random”

“I know but I just want you to know how I feel right now”

“I love you too goofball”

“Hehe”

WILL HEHE WHEN YOU COMPLIMENT HIM PLS HE SNICKERS ALL THE TIME AND BLUSHES.

Loves to give affection however he can.

This means he’ll bring flowers during lunch or whatever just to surprise you to see the look on your face.

Loves sharing food with you because he gets to feed you.

Same when you’re sick he will be babying you.

Bokuto is a switch so he’s moody no doubt about it for when he wants you on top.

He can be v dominant when you see him after a match he lost or if he’s very hype.

Will go into “whos the best fucking player mm?” mode in the bedroom 0_0.

Loves when you pull his hair WHEHE.

Loves to do matching outfits sometimes lowkey.

Also LOVES LOVES LOVES to show you off infront of literally everyone???

Akaashi is like ok chile.

He thinks your relationship is good for bokuto because he’s not up his ass all the time and he doesn’t have to deal with the emo king.

Loves to kiss you on the forehead during romantic moments.

He feels that it symbolizes more affection then a kiss on the lips sometimes.

He also kisses you by grabbing you with both hands by the face.

Super passionate kisser literally out of a movie scene.

Likes sending memes of like everything dedass, especially shows you watch together which is ALSO a lot.

Will name a star after himself and tell you that ‘whenever you look up at the sky you can find me’

Super cute gifts.

Bokuto has a type.

It’s the incredibly cute kind.

He needs someone to match his uwu energy.

He loves you for your ambition and strive.

This is because he feels the same way about vollyball so when he sees you being so driven with something it reminds him of himself.

Loves your personality more than anything.

You’re probably always big spoon because babie hello unless he’s like ok protective owl time.

If you’re short he loves to throw you over his shoulder and run around with you.

“Babe not again”

“But WHYYYYY it was so fun last time”

“FOR YOU! I was being carried around like a dead CHICKEN”

“A CUTE DEAD CHICKEN!”

“I- bokuto”

If you’re tall he will dedass ask you to do blocks for him even if you don’t play vollyball... there is no choice.

Tall jokes 24/7.

“How’s the weather up there mm?”

“Shut up bokuto”

“Mhm just don’t get hit by any birds”

“-_-”

Boyfriend status again 10/10 but will pull the wholeass sheet off of you and when you yell at him he will tell you to ‘get closer then’.

It’s really a preference at this point.

Hey guys, I apologize for this long awaited post. I’ve had this in my drafts for forever and I haven’t been feeling in the mood to write lately but I hope this is good!

[new-tella-us]

Komahina Oneshot

Komahina ft. Trans Hajime. Another Tumblr inspired post. The tumblr account is catboymoments. Gotta give credit where credit is due.

If you didn't know that this is very gay and trans then idk how you got here but I'm happy to have ya.

But seriously, this has some pretty big trigger warnings

- Gender Dysphoria

- Complicated pregnancy

- Mentions of abortion

-PTSD

Anyways Onto the Oneshot!

Wow! I'm Pregnant! We're gunna have a happy family! Except...I'm a guy.

I feel horrible... This has been going on for about three days now. Mornings are the worst. I can't tell why. It's starting to worry Nagito and it's not like I can fake it, I tried. You can't fake puking. I can at least fake being somewhat lively.

...I need to get up. Need to get moving. Need to- Nevermind! I need to puke! Fuck... This feels disgusting. Maybe I should try and diagnose myself, or have Mikan help me. I felt a pat on my back; I knew it was Nagito but, I couldn't look at him while puking my guts out. When I finally finished desecrating the poor toilet I got up. I was sweating, pale and covered in whatever I managed to puke up on an empty stomach. I flushed the toilet and washed my face.

Nagito gave me a worried look. What was once an 'are you okay?' question turned into, "How are you feeling now?"

"I'm better," I responded. There wasn't much else to say, "I'll get this checked out soon, I'll just give it another day or two."

Nagito face turned stern, "Hajime, you need to get this thing checked out today! This has gone on for too long." He went out of the bathroom and grabbed his phone, "I'm calling Tsumiki-chan."

"Nonono! It's okay Nagito! I'll do it tomorrow! I can handle this myself!" I responded, a bit panicked. I never liked getting help from others, it didn't feel right to bother someone over something I can do myself.

"You said that yesterday. I'm calling Tsumiki-chan." He said in a more stern voice. I couldn't respond, there was no point in arguing with him when he's like this, plus; he's right. He made the call. I didn't hear Mikan's side of the call but, from what I can hear on Nagito's side, they made a time, 1 pm. He hung up and looked back at me, his glaze softened.

"Let's get you something to eat, okay?"

"Yeah," He smiles softly and gave me a small kiss on the forehead before leading me out of the house. But, while we were walking towards the cafeteria, a little voice told me something.

You know exactly what's happening.

I shook the thought away.

...

Breakfast was, mostly, fine. Only going to the bathroom once! Now, I have some time before I have to talk to Mikan. Nagito insists that I rest but I've gotten bored of doing that. I decided to just walk around the island. It was a really hot day and I was getting tired so, I couldn't walk for long. Huh, that never happens, I usually have more stamina than that... Maybe Nagito was right. Well, Nagito is usually right. Maybe I should just listen to Nagito more.

I started walking back, only taking a break to puke near a tree. Now, I'm really sweating, shaking too. I felt light-headed. Then, an unexpected helper appeared. She put my arm on her shoulder, behind her neck, her other hand supported me from my side. I didn't look up, I didn't need to. Her light orange kimono with scattered pink cherry blossoms gave away who she was.

"Hey Saionji..."

"Didn't listen to Komaeda again?" She knew it...

"Nope." I responded with as much satire I could muster.

"You're an idiot."

"Yup" Indeed I was but I could think about that a little bit more when my head wasn't spinning like crazy. Hiyoko helped me back to my cottage before leaving me to enter it myself. I opened the door and both Nagito and Mikan were sitting on the couch. I guess she came early.

"Hey guys, it seems like you were both waiting for me. Sorry about that."

"I-It's fine Hinata-san. So tell me a-about your condition. I've only seen g-glimpses of it" Mikan said.

So I explained. The morning sickness, the lack of energy and stamina. The fact that I can't even walk around the island without becoming pale and out of breath. Mikan thought about it and started checking her tablet. I assumed that she was looking up what this could mean before her eyes widen on something.

"I-I....I never knew this. Umm...I'll b-be right back." She seemed nervous as se got up and practically ran out of the house.

You know where she's going, you know what she's getting

There's that voice is again. I have no time for hallucinations or weird creepy messages.

...

Mikan returned after a few minutes with a little rectangular box in her hand.

"Welcome back, Tsumiki-chan. Now, are you going to explain why you suddenly freaked out like that and left?" Nagito said.

Mikan's gaze fell on me. Her look was almost unreadable. It's very unlike her.

"Hinata-san. Are you trans?" She asked bluntly.

"Wh-What?! What made you ask that??" I panicked. How did she know? How did she guess??

She turned her tablet to me; my profile was on it as was everyone else's. She pressed one of those special info buttons and a symbol appeared next to my profile picture.

The Female Sex Symbol...

Silence...

...Shit...

"I'm surprised that you didn't realize that this button exists. After all the creator of these tablets had a member who's entire case was solved because their sex was revealed." Mikan said. She always did have more confidence when she spoke facts. I didn't have anything to say, neither did Nagito. Mikan handed me the box; it was a pregnancy test.

"I w-won't ask. That's your b-business..." Her timidity returned. No, she won't ask because she'll get her answer depending on what I say or do. I could hand her back the test. I could lie and say I'm a virgin but, that wouldn't help me...

I got up and went to the bathroom...

...

......

...Are...Are you serious...? The test came back positive?! I...don't know how to feel about this... At least I know what's happening to me and probably why it's hitting me so hard.

...I feel too sick for this.

You knew this was coming.

'Izuru...not now. Please.'

You know you can't fully get rid of her.

'Who are you talking about?'

As if to answer my question, he materialized but not as himself. He materialized as a young girl. A girl that looks a lot like me.

'Fuck off, Izuru. You know that's not me...'

Is it not? It's who you once were.

'That was never me! She was someone else. Just a person of the past.'

And that way of thinking is what got you here. It's time for you to face the facts. You may be a boy but, you're not male. You forgetting that is why that test is positive. You took a chance, you were risky and here you are.

'We're done here.'

I was steaming. I couldn't listen to another word that fell out of that man's mouth. I needed to calm down. I took some deep breaths and left the bathroom. Mikan left but, Nagito was still there. I wasn't concerned with him knowing that I was trans, he already knew; he would have to know since he's...

"So, what happened? What did she give you? Are you okay?" he asked but, I had a feeling that he knew. I didn't want the mood to be sour. Having kids is supposed to be a good thing so, I wanted to lighten the mood with a pun.

"Well, I guess I should be invisible."

"...What? What do you mean?" He looked puzzled.

I looked at the pregnancy test. "Well, I'm a trans-parent." (Yes, I took this pun from the same tumblr user)

He looked at me, still puzzled, for a few minutes before he realized.

"...oh. Oh OH! You don't mean-" He looked happy, so happy. He gave me a hug, "Oh my god! I've always wanted to be a dad!"

He has? Great... Personally, I never wanted kids. I used to but, secondary school... changed me and showed me that really, I don't. But I can't just make a split second decision, he seem so happy...

"Yeah, but can we discuss this a bit more? I have my issues that I need to address."

His smile faded a bit "Uh sure"

We both sat on the bed of our room. I didn't know what to say. I don't know if I want to do this but, it would feel wrong just to abort with no conversation.

"So umm... Nagito. I...I don't know if I'm- we're ready to have kids. I guess I'm kind of worried?"

Tell him the actual reason, Hajime.

"I don't know what effect this might have on me and I'm scared that I might not be a great dad..."

Hajime...

"Is that the reason?" Nagito asked.

"...Yeah"

If you don't tell him, I will.

"..." I wasn't going to say anything but, Izuru kept on his threat. I lost control of my body.

"He has gender dysphoria" Izuru said, "So this pregnancy is reminding him of his uncertainty. The place he used to live in was not the most accepting of transgendered people"

Nagito fell silent, he was stunned. Damn it Izuru... did you have to be so blunt? I got control of my body back, I couldn't even look at Nagito, I felt so ashamed, I was putting my anxieties above a life. It felt...wrong. Or is it a life? It's a clump of cells but, it can become a life. I've been around too many mixed influences. I wish I knew which decision was the good decision.

Then again..

Is there truly a 'good' decision? On one hand, I'm killing a potential life and that will haunt me but, if I'm not ready to be a parent, I'm bringing a child into a world neither it nor I'm ready for and with a current war having, it's not like adoption is an option and, like Izuru said, it forces me to accept-

"Why didn't you tell me?" Nagito asked. He didn't sound mad, he sounded sad and even a bit guilty, I didn't answer, "I'm sorry if me saying that pressured you." He gave me a hug. I felt so guilty. "I can't say that I fully understand but, no matter what you choose, I'll be in your corner."

"I'm gunna give it a week or two then I'll make my decision," I said nearly in tears, "thank you for being so supportive."

...

It's been two weeks, I thought about it everyday. I was already two week pregnant so with another two weeks, the time for abortion via safe mentions was soon ending. I hesitated and swayed back and forth on my answer. I truly didn't know for a while. But, about two days before my decision I found myself sticking to an answer. I'll stick with this pregnancy. It might help me get over my gender dysphoria, maybe not fully but, somewhat? Plus, it's quite an efficient way to tell everyone that I'm trans. And who know, maybe I'm a better parent than I think I am and with Nagito, I feel like I can take it. It's sort of strange; I'm aware of all the health risks, the mental tax, the problems and possible sadness but, I feel like I can take it. I feel calmer know that I at least, have one person- well two people with Tsumiki, in my corner.

"I'm keeping it" I said with a hug.

"Really? You sure?" Nagito asked.

"Yeah, we're gonna be a family." I smiled, it wasn't fake.

But of course, like everything else in my life, it didn't come without complication. I was already pregnancy four weeks and was just feeling more exhausted. Another week had passed and I kept feeling worse. I didn't know why. I felt exhausted and cold. I was exhausted but not tired, not sleepy. I was awake and shaky. Nagito called Mikan again when he started to notice how pale I was getting. She said it was Iron Deficiency Anemia along with Hypertension. Two things that were really common in pregnancy. She gave me medication for it and it did help but not fully.

At about 8 weeks, I told the group about me being trans and about the child. Mikan recommended to do that instead of immediately because that's when the risk of a miscarriage goes down to less than 10 percent. The group was so happy to have two children born at similar times. Yes, two! Sonia and Gundham were having a kid as well. What a coincidence! Sonia insisted that we started talking more about it.

12 weeks in and everything has been going as smoothly as it can. There's still work, there's still complications, sleeping is an issue, I have been diagnosed with Insomnia, this pregnancy has also made me more dependent on Nagito and has given me more time to think and I don't know if I like that... But, everyone's been really supportive, they haven't treated me any different and because I have a bit more time, I can hangout with them more. I've learnt a lot more about Sonia. I knew a bit about her, like that she's into witchcraft and serial killer documentaries but, she was also into slice of life novels so, this was a dream of hers. How cute.

Weeks 16 - 30 can be summed up here. They all passed the same; excited conversations, preparations, fun little talks, work, insomnia, exhaustion, etc. What was really note worthy was while Nagito went out on a mission to the main lands, Makoto brought back a fluffy white dog, a Great Pyrenees puppy. We agreed to keep and so when Nagito came home, I surprised him with the dog. At first, he was silent, then he started crying; I was scared the he didn't like the dog but, that changed when he went up and hugged the dog, he was so happy. Apparently, this was the exact breed of the dog Nagito used to have. Wow, how lucky. He sat with it for hours before being willing to pry away from it and go to sleep. We decided to call her Lucy.

Fast forward to week 37, about 3 weeks before we thought I was due. I was pulling an all-nighter on this one project to have it done by tomorrow. I knew I was pushing myself but I was almost done, I wanted to free up my schedule so I can have more time with my baby. Nagito, however, was starting to get concerned.

"Hajime, it's really late. You should rest."

"I'm almost done, okay? I just need to finish this last assignment and I'll be in bed. Just give me about an hour." I said, trying to easy his concern.

"Alright.." He didn't sound too convinced but he did leave.

I continued to work on my project and the time flew by until in the middle of my assignment, my stomach really hurt, more than usual. Do you really need to kick that hard, Future Child? I tried to continues working but the pain would just come back worse every time. Maybe I should just go to bed... I tried to get up and walk back to my bedroom but the pain sent me down the floor, everything hurts...everything hurts...I couldn't even scream, I was in so much pain...I felt something wet trickle down and I knew what it was at this point. I didn't know what to do, I was crying. Was I going to die? Was I just going to have to give birth here and now? What can I do??

Then, my savior came into the room. No not Nagito, Lucy! She took one good look and me and went sprinting out the door. I could hear her barking and soon she seem back with Nagito.

"Hajime!! Are you okay!?"

I wanted to say something to something to that question; 'yes', 'no', 'shut the fuck up and call Tsumiki' but, I couldn't let out a sound. Luckily, he took the hint and called Mikan.

"Tsumiki-chan. I'm sorry to wake you but, Hajime may be going through contractions? Please help?!"

They talked for a bit, I could barely focus. I just remember Nagito carrying me to the bathroom while talking to Mikan. I don't know if she was just fast or if I blanked out for a bit but, Mikan was there before I knew it. They both briefly conversed before they got me dressed in a cheap, long white shirt and set me down in the bath. Mikan started sticking needles in me, I don't know what for and she was still talking to Nagito. She finally looked at me and told me to count my contractions and how often they happen. After each one (Because it hurts too much to talk during contractions) I would tell her, when she decided that they were regular enough, she grasped my hand a little and told me to take a deep breathe. I did. Then she told me to push.

That's when it hit me, this was happening now! Oh my god, I was not ready for this but, I don't have much of a choice. So I pushed. Oh god it hurts! I felt like my bones were breaking. She then told me to breathe again and I did, we repeated this until the water started to turn red with blood.

Blood...blood...

Blood...Blood...Blood...Blood...Blood...Blood...Blood...Blood...Blood...Blood...Blood...Blood...Blood...

Blood? Did someone die? I felt like I was somewhere else. I was watching the murders of the student council again, so much blood...like a perfect quality horror movie, I saw them all murder each other clear as day, every person, every stabbing, every slicing, every shooting, all the bloodshed, clear as the day I first saw it. I never forgot any of their faces...

Then, as if it couldn't get worse...all the murders, all the executions...all the blood, clear as day. I was just watching, unable to do anything. Nagito...Chiaki... They were gone. Was my happy life all a dream? Is this the reality I'm truly in or am I hallucinating and this is the fake reality? I can't tell, I can't tell... I want out of this nightmare! I hear voices in the distance, at first I couldn't understand what they are saying but, as the voices got louder, I could slowly understand. Were they calling me? I got my answer.

"HAJIME!" Nagito shouted, dragging me back to reality. I panicked at the different scenery. My heart was pounding, threatening to rip out of my chest. I looked around to see where I was, I was in the bathroom. I couldn't keep my vision still.

Nagito cupped my cheeks, obviously trying to calm me down. "Hajime look at me, okay?"

I tried to focus my vision on him, his eyes full of panic and worry.

"You're having a panic attack. Whatever you saw, it's just an illusion. You're okay, I'm okay, everyone is okay. Please try to calm down."

My throat was dry and hoarse but, I took a deep breath. I continued to do that until I became calmer.

He smiled down at me "Good...good."

Mikan then piped up, "Komaeda-san, I'm sorry but, we do need to c-continue with this..." Then she got an idea, "If blood is a trigger to Hinata-san then can maybe he should just look at you instead. I'll still need your attention Hinata-san but, just keep l-looking at him."

"Yeah, that's a good idea." Nagito agreed. I just nodded. So Mikan continued with her instruction and I kept my eyes on Nagito. It made the birthing a little easier to see his smile and soon enough I did my last push, I felt a weight leave me and while I was still sore, it didn't hurt nearly as much anymore. That's when the fatigue washed over me. I could feel myself passing out already.

"Hey hey...um, I know you're tired but, can you stay awake just a little longer please? Just until Tsumiki-chan says it's okay. Please?"

I didn't want to, the work should be over by now but, I could do it. Voices faded in and out, I was barely able to concentrate. Then, Nagito gave me a kiss on the forehead.

"You did it Hajime! It's okay now, you can rest." His voice was quiet and soothing.

"...Great.." I replied groggily before falling asleep almost immediately after.

I fell into a deep, very needed sleep. It was relaxing for once. No dreams, no nightmares just, floating in the darkness. But, I had to wake up.

The sun was shining through the curtains, not too much sun but, just enough to give the room a bright warm haze. I still felt sore but, it was much better than last night. I sat up and yawned.

"Oh good morning, Sleepyhead." Nagito said, playfully. He was sitting right next to me, looking at me with a warm smile. "I was wondering when you were going to wake up."

I felt a bit out of it, it seemed so peaceful right now, I just wanted to bask in it for a while. I took the time to notice things around me, like the fact that I was wearing something different; it was one of Nagito shirts and my boxers. I also noticed a little crib in the far corner of our bedroom with what looks to be a baby inside.

"Do you want to see your child?" Nagito asked.

I could only nod. He got up and went to the crib, picked up the small child and came back to the bed. Handing me the child he said,

"Meet your new baby son"

I held the child gently in my arms and at that moment, everything became worth it. He woke up and looked at me. I was expecting him to cry but, instead he just giggles grabbed my finger. Now I'm the one whose crying!

Nagito chuckled, "Don't cry on the baby!" He said playfully but, he was crying too.

He gave me a kiss, "I love you, Hajime"

I returned it, "I love you too, Nagito"

We both held our son and I knew, deep in my heart, this was the right decision.

We're a family now!

If I got something wrong, please tell me. I really tried and I wanna get it right.

[syubub]

Hoseok soulmate reading

Let's get the disclaimer out of the way: This is for entertainment purposes only and shouldn't be taken as fact! This is my interpretation of the cards.

Oki. Before we begin I must say... I put this off as long as possible. For those of you who have followed me for a while, you know that hobi is THE HARDEST to connect with and tbh this was no different. I'll probably revisit this reading again at a different time (you'll see why)

So. To start things off... Hope has some.. strange(?) energy. His energy was really vague and weak. The color too is intresting because its 100% not a color I've ever seen and I'm not sure if something is afflicting the color of his energy? Its ruby red but also deep grey blue? Its really strange and honestly pretty but it doesn't feel like the normal color? The color is usually a nice red with some deeper hints but...Its usually a bit more... lively? It just feels dull right now.

It looks like this right now but with a little more red? Its really peculiar.

Now. Idk maybe some shit is going on with him right now? Or maybe bc there was a fuckin lunar eclipse in Gemini last night? Idk but the energy was a little.. hostile. That's not a bad thing but it kinda felt like he was being broody? Its all really strange but he was not very into the reading (more so than usual) blah blah he didn't want to talk and I asked some questions I probably shouldn't have and some stuff happened. Long story short his soulmate(?) Showed up and pushed our foreheads together so we'd have to connect.

I asked his soulmate if they could tell me what the fuck was going on and they said that they don't know him well. Idk if that means that they don't know him well on a soul level? I'll get into this more later but this feels like something that's already been concluded or comes back up from time to time.

"He's pretty closed off huh?" Yes soulmate. He is.

I asked for more info about them and they said May. I was like cool, is that your name or? "Nah" sick is that like you're birthday? "Not really" cool cool cool.

They did say that he deserves better than what he has. I'm gonna leave it at that but hobi is possibly going through some shit.

Now we can get onto the reading part. I do want to say though, this reading felt very disconnected and weird? Just like somethings off and I have a feeling that this soulmate is more of the "life lesson" type soulmate?

Oki. We have temperance, chariot, two of cups, queen of coins. This is a person who is definitely motivated and driven and 100% a business savy human. They are also very likely loyal and know how to balance work and play time very very well. Is well-off (or materialistic) lol. There's a very ride or die energy that tells me this person is the type of friend that will do anything for you but when you do stupid shit then you get a stern talking to. Idk why but it also feels lonely? Like they're on their own journey to find themselves and their path/happiness/self and if it doesn't fit in the wagon then it gets left behind. This person might move too fast and miss out on important things because they're always chasing after something. They take "its not the destination that matters but the journey that does" to a whole new level and they just never stop to enjoy the scenery bc they'd rather get the rush of newness.

As for their relationship. As I said before I think this soulmate specifically is the "life lesson" type and could definitelybe a platonicsoulmate too. The kind that provides you with an opportunity for growth. With the 5 of swords rev. I kinda think that this could be someone from either a past life or back in a less favorable time. The fool card to me makes me thin that this relationship provides a sense of being born again? Its that newness of having a new perspective and a whole new understanding of self. With the magician rev. Its about issues with communication i.e not being able to get across your needs and desires for both of them and a lack of energy to figure it out. I also feel like this was just something that they didn't fix and didn't want to fix. (I'm talking in past tense bc this reading feels like its someone from the past) This card also talks about deception. I'm not gonna go into this much. With the 3 of wands though!! Yay! This talks about progress and I feel like this points to them learning more and more about who they are and what they truly want. They're kinda like lines that were moving towards eachother, intersected and then continued going in their own direction. Its like this time together was formative in who they are as people and what they dream of! And with the father of cups it does seem that over all the relationship was/is (I don't know how to talk about this) relatively balanced and they had/have respect for eachother. This card specifically is about balanced emotions and emotional intelligence and I think that this is what they gain from this relationship.

Moving right along we have the oracle cards! Stand by you commitment, financial healing, unconventionality, socialize or join in and sensitive emotions. The flower cards are from hobi to soulmate and the others are from soulmate to hope. Now. Maybe his soulmate went through a failed business venture that they're recovering from or just general money trouble bc the whole world is being fucked over by a virus. Either way hobi is very strong in the message of commitment (that makes me think that its specifically about business or something they started but never finished) onto cards for Hope. He might kinda be going through the shitty times and his soulmates advice is to not isolate and celebrate himself more. He might be having some issues related to self image or a soul-identity crisis? Idk but hobi needs that good good self care and love.

Now the two unicorn cards. Those are also from his soulmate to hope about some personal shit and I will be leaving that out because its not my fucking business. (Hobi is fine don't worry)

Woo wee lets get on to traits! First for zodiac sign. Earth, fire, air. Possible Libra and Taurus placements.

Tiny cards. Light hair, dark hair, sweet, extrovert, hard working, tall, business oriented, loud, fate, sorry, open, faith, happy, wait.

First off I get brown hair vibes (maybe medium brown?)

The word cards sound like his soulmate trying to give him a pep talk so I pulled an affirmation card that says in stillness I receive. I think hobi is going through some soul stuff and I'm not sure if this specificly translates into his life right now (though I think it does and he's repressing it or hopefully he's sorting it out on his own privately)

Oki oki oki. Idk why but it also might be that hobi is doing work to heal his inner child? I honestly don't know whats going on or if its affecting him in his day to day life at this time but I want to come back and do this reading at a time that he might be in a better energy space?

Hobi is ALWAYS hard to read and its even harder when he's less open than usual.

I'll get another soulmate read from hobi at some point and see if I can catch a "future/current romantic soulmate"

I am confused 😕

Also!! I have a Ko-fi now! I'll drop the link here but its in my bio! Absolutely no pressure but its there for people who want to tip me and were looking for a way to support me! (Also, I'm not taking readings through ko-fi so please don't drop money and request a reading there.)

Ko-fi: https://ko-fi.com/syubub

[kumawrites]

hi!! idk how requests work but coffeeshop au with oikawa as the flirty barista and you're just trying to find a place to study okay bye 😶😶

iced vanilla bean latte

☆ oikawa tooru x reader ☆

☆ - 1.7k words

☆ - a/n: i based this 100% in a local coffee shop in my area that i frequent except i h8 coffee

☆ - taglist: @miceonmars

//

“Y/N, Obama was the last president of the United States, not the third.” Kiyoko looked at you with a pitiful gaze in response to your answer.

“Oh.” You blinked once. Twice. A third time for good measure. So your American Politics class was needless to say, not going very well. Honestly, you didn’t even know why you were taking an American politics class when you lived in Japan. Actually, you knew why. Because of your horrible habit of procrastinating literally anything that can be procrastinated, you foolishly waited until the very last day that you could to register for classes. And unsurprisingly, most of them had been completely filled, leaving American Politics to be the only history class that you were able to take. Which would have been just fine, had you not procrastinated studying and even taking notes.

You stared blankly down at your notebook that was barely a quarter full. Instead of taking notes and actually paying attention in class, you either skipped or distracted yourself playing games on your phone. Your professor never notified you since you sat right in the middle of the lecture hall, not drawing much attention at all. Maybe, that wasn’t a good thing, however. You had no connection to your professor at all, and asking for help this late in the game just didn’t feel right, which is extremely irrational but you really didn’t care.

Your problem would really just have been solved if you did care. Too bad you didn’t. However, you’re stuck in a bit of a pickle now, not knowing even the basics of the class, with midterms coming up and a frighteningly fast rate. You were bound to fail, and your parents would not be very happy about that. So, you decided that it was finally time to actually study. Except studying really meant learning all of the material that you had covered for half of the semester in about a week.

Luckily for you, you had great friends who were super smart and actually studious to help! Kiyoko had already taken the class, being a grade ahead of you, and had graciously blessed you with her notebook full of her beautiful notes. It was truly astounding how notes could be so pretty. Yachi, on the other hand, gave your studying tips and ways to actually study well. Without those two, you would have failed the midterm for sure, and most likely the course all together.

You were currently studying with Kiyoko in the library, well trying to at least. Apparently, you knew less than you actually thought.

“Wait, what’s a Conservative? Is that a branch of Congress?” You weren’t doing too hot.

“It’s a political party. They’re a more extreme version of a the Republican Party.” You nodded your head, slowly understanding. Why were politics so complicated?

“Oh, okay. I think I get it. So, Liberals are Democrats but more extreme?”

“That’s right.” Kiyoko nodded her head as you scratched down some of her notes into your own notebook. Kiyoko’s phone pinged and she grabbed it from the table, turning it on. She read the message, sighed, replied, and began packing up her things. “Sorry, Y/N, but my boss just messaged me. I have to go in tonight, Hana got sick.” You nodded and gave Kiyoko a slight smile and a wave as she left. Now it was just you, left to your own devices. You were half tempted to close your books and play Fire Emblem, but that seemed like a poor long term choice.

You kept at it for a surprisingly long amount of time, around an hour, until a rowdy group came in. Even though it was a library, it wasn’t the most quiet of places on campus, and many groups liked to come in to work on group projects. You had no problem with them, until they set down their bags and their bodies at the table right next to yours, still chatting loudly. Unfortunately for you, you didn’t bring your earbuds with you. Since you assumed you would just be studying with Kiyoko the whole time, you didn’t bother to pack them. The one moment in your life when you needed them the most. A tragedy.

You sighed and packed up your things, considering giving up studying for the day, until you realized you were running out of time and were still extremely confused. And tired. You yawned as your left the library, wondering where to go from there. Going back to your dorm would only lead to you playing video games and ignoring everything else, so that was off the list. Every other place you could think of would be far too noisy to actually study. You were in quite the pickle.

You were really close to giving up for the hundredth time until you passed by a coffee shop that you had never seen on campus before. Was that always there? No, it couldn’t have been. It was in the middle of a route you used all of the time to get across campus. But how did you never notice that this was there? The shop had large windows that you could peek through to see a very classy interior. Everything seemed to be made of a walnut coloured wood, excluding the black chairs and stools. There weren’t too many people in the shop, just a small crowd. It looked peaceful. You stood there for a bit before deciding to walk inside. Maybe this is where you could study in peace.

As soon as you opened the door, you were greeted with the smell of fresh roasted coffee beans. You stopped a vacant table and placed your belonging on it and took a seat. The chairs were surprisingly comfortable, even though they seemed to be made of metal. The vibe in the entire shop was very calm. You could get used to this.

You took your notes out and began to study, creating flashcards and making your notes a bit cleaner and more cohesive. This was the kind of productivity that you needed to have on a daily basis. Too bad that this energy was for sure going to leave your body once you finish your midterm. Another yawn left your body, and you turned your head towards the counter. You could buy a coffee. That wasn’t going to break your bank account. Yeah.

You stood up and headed towards the counter, staring at the menu. Everything on the menu sounded fine, but you didn’t know exactly what you wanted.

“Hey! What can I do for you today?” A cheery voice broke you form your thoughts and you brought your eyes back down to look at who was speaking to you. The barista that greeted you had a charming smile on his face, one that you knew just drew people in. He was pretty, for sure, but you didn’t have time to think about pretty boys, too focused on trying to pass your class.

“Hi there. I’ve never been here, so I’m not too sure what to get. What would you recommend?” You have him a polite smile in return, and shifted your gaze back to the menu. There were so many options that you were a bit overwhelmed with choices

“Hmm..” The barista tapped his chin and scrunched his face a bit. “What about the vanilla bean latte? It’s really good iced!” He suggested and you nodded your head.

“Okay, sure. I’ll have that as a 24 ounce, then.” You ordered such a large drink since you assumed that you would be here for a while, having so much material left to study.

“Oh, it’s Y/N.” You replied and he hummed, typing it into the tablet on the counter. Your total came up and you handed him your card, making sure to leave a tip.

“That’s a cute name, just like you!” You stared at him. It was like someone had just stopped a record right in the middle of a song. What? Did you hear that right?

“Sorry, um, what?”

“I just think you’re super cute. We’ll have that vanilla bean right out for ya, Y/N.” He winked and walked over to his coworker who was making your drink. You vaguely remember his coworker scolding him, telling him to ‘stop flirting with the customers shithead’, but you really weren’t listening. Were you just, flirted with? Is that how this works? You for sure were not expecting that to happen.

You returned to your seat and opened up your notes, trying to forget the flirting(?) and focus on your studies. That’s what you came here to do, not flirt with a cute barista that you would for sure go on a date with. But, he was probably just a flirty person, you figured. If his coworker scolded him like that, it was probably a common occurrence, meaning you shouldn’t take it to heart or anything. He was just super cute.

Only a few minutes after you began to actually focus in on your work, you noticed that a large plastic cup full of iced coffee and a plate with a muffin was placed down at your table. Looking up, you saw the cute barista with a beaming smile on his face.

“Here you go, Y/N. Hope you like it.”

“Oh, I didn’t order a muffin.” You tilted your head up at the man who chuckled in response.

“I know. It’s on the house.” And with that, he gave you a tiny wave and disappeared into the back room, leaving you shook. Was this protocol? No, definitely not. Was this protocol for him flirting with every female customer? His boss wouldn’t let him give out that much free food. Was he really, for sure, actually, flirting with you? Was this real? Are you real? Okay, not time for an existential crisis.

You picked up the muffin on the plate, and noticed a small note that was placed under it.. It read, ‘text me!!!! :) xxx-xxx-xxxx - oikawa’. At this point, you were pretty damn sure he was flirting with you. Holy shit. He was flirting with you. Oikawa, you assumed his name was, still hadn’t come out of the storage room, so you couldn’t gauge his reactions or anything. You stared at your phone that you picked up like it was an explosive, ready to detonate. Were you actually going to text him? Was this actually a good idea? You know what, fuck American politics, you had something far more pressing to deal with at the moment.

y/n: hey is this oikawa? this is y/n

oikawa: hey cutie!! ;)

[cynthiaandsamus]

Custom Toonami Block Week 79 Rundown

Code Geass: Lelouch is establishing the official United States of Fuck Imperialism which is like the UN but actually does stuff, plus he has to deal with the fact that CC’s lost her memory and is acting like a demure slave girl harem choice from a VN. Charles is still trapped in the Human Instrumentality Shadow Realm so everyone figures this is a great time to unify everyone against Britannia. Kallen beats the shit out of Suzaku for being a dick to her all this time and the Knight of Ten is making his rounds because they realize they forgot to give him any buildup and he’s going to be a miniboss later so they have to cram all his being a dick personality into like five minutes while all the Knights of the Round assemble to prepare for an attack on Japan once the National Federation is formed. Llyod and Cecile for some reason enhanced the Guren for Suzaku even though he’s clearly more used to the Lancelot but apparently they enhanced it too much and made it a death machine like the Talgeese in Gundam Wing so Suzaku has to stick with the Lancelot. Looks like the Guren will have to sit and collect dust unless a certain pilot is rescued and then immediately has a convenient upgrade. Amazingly all the countries go along with everything Zero says and give up their militaries and have the Black Knights be the official military of the Federation. I don’t know how that works given that the Black Knights have been struggling to fight off one nation’s military idk how it’s supposed to substitute for a dozen nations’ military but I guess they conscript support and troops from the other nations or something. Charles comes back on the tv after the Federation is formed and is all “Awww what a cute little UN you have, fuck off bro.” which you’d think this’d be the perfect time for him to just out Lelouch as Zero and wreck the Black Knights’ morale but he doesn’t for some reason and they’re just gonna fight. Lelouch is freaking out and knows that having everyone want to murder the Britannian royal family includes Nunally so he calls Suzaku who just straight up goes “Bro cut the crap are you Zero or not?” and after so much plotting and scheming Lelouch just comes right out with it. Suzaki agrees to protect Nunally as long as Lelouch meets him alone at the Kururugi Shrine where this all began.

Inuyasha: This is another one of those Modern Day filler episodes which are always fun. There’s just something about Inuyasha running around in modern Japan being Spider-Man and saving people and catching bank robbers on the way to deliver Kagome’s lunch that’s so thoroughly entertaining. Basically Inuyasha spends this whole episode jittery that everyone’s so chill and ready to relax after Naraku just got away and is probably an inch from death but after a big adventure in the modern era where Kagome is as usual unprepared for her test, he ends up passing out on the bed after insisting a little battle with Naraku wouldn’t exhaust him. It’s a really cute little episode to let everyone bide some time and reflect on the past arc now that we’re starting a new wave of filler before we get to the Band of Seven and Mt. Hakurei stuff.

Yu Yu Hakusho: The first match of the tournament is about to begin and Botan, Shizuru, and Keiko come in with Koenma who is sick of baby jokes and puts on his bishonen disguise to impress everyone. There’s some neat lore about how they gave Koenma the guest team every year to bribe him into not shutting down the tournament without giving him anything of value and how the bloody show of the Dark Tournament pacifies the demons so they kill fewer humans, so that’s cool. Since Yusuke is still passed out, Kuwabara is de facto Captain and decides on simple one on one matches while the other team Captain just kinda roasts an eight of the crowd to see if it’ll wake Yusuke up. Kuwabara’s in the first match versus Prototype Killua, complete with afterimages and yo-yo tricks. They size each other up for a while and Kuwabara shrugs off getting his fucking neck broken surprisingly well while they go back and forth with “Well I can track YOU better” for a while. Togashi really loves his yo-yos of death so those have Kuwabara on the ropes and turn him into a fucking kite ready to slam back down into the arena, so yeah, Kuwabara’s having a rough time of it.

Fate Zero: Waver’s been having strange dreams about Iskandar, and not the ones people usually have about him. So he goes to get a basic history lesson on the historical figure that’s been chilling on his couch for a few weeks and spending all his money on xbox live arcade. They also go through all the ridiculously obvious historical inaccuracies and Iskandar’s just like “idk bro, I’m here so the book must be wrong” which is hilarious because Fate also does this with more modern historical figures that we have pictures of and shit so they basically sit there saying all historians have no idea what they’re talking about and gaslighting the field of history as a whole. On the way back Waver’s upset that Iskandar’s so awesome that it basically takes any effort on his part to win and it won’t be an actual achievement despite the fact that they’ve taken out like… one servant, MAYBE, and most of the other historical figures are equally over the top. But still Iskandar says that if your aspirations are big enough it doesn’t matter how big or small you are, everyone’s tiny in the grand scheme of things and clawing at greatness you can’t truly perceive is what matters. Also Caster and his boy have found the wreck they made of their workshop of dead bodies and are kinda fucked up about it but also ready to fuck up more people because God sucks or some shit. So Caster summons a Bloodborne monster which you think more people would notice and mention during Shirou’s time, like nobody in UBW ever said “Hey remember like seven years ago when a giant Bloodborne monster appeared in the river?” so I’m guessing there’s some kind of perception blocking going on. But yeah everyone’s gonna jump on the Bloodborne Monster next time for the season premiere.  

Konosuba: So we pick up where we left off and Kazuma is working off his debt by… killing more toads. Wow this world really is like a video game, we get the same five enemies over and over again. However they’re fucked without Darkness throwing herself into monster orifices looking for a good time so Yunyun has to save them. We already met Yunyun in the OVA so it’s kinda weird to be re-introduced to her here in basically the same way but their relationship is basically like Gai and Kakashi if they only did the lame dorky challenges Kakashi suggested when he’s too lazy to think of a good one. Also there’s a cat now, I don’t think that really comes to anything, just a scene of Megumin going “we have a cat now” and everyone’s like “kay”. Kazuma and Megumin play Naked Chicken to see who can get more naked before the other backs down and end up taking a bath together because they’re both stubborn assholes. Also we get a quick snippet of Yunyun and Megumin’s backstories which you can basically make Yunyun’s the swing scene from Naruto (idk why Yunyun is bring out the Naruto references in me today) and Megumin is stealing bread like Les Miserables in increasingly bizarre and disgusting ways because she’s ridiculously poor or some shit.

Sailor Moon Crystal: So turns out that Usagi and Mamoru BOTH had their shots with the ‘fucks everything up’ sword with a pocketwatch and… the discarded gems of the four knights? Idk how that works given they were humans and also dead but what baffles me more is that both Usagi and Mamoru very obviously did not get hit by the sword but decided to fall down dead and not move for a couple minutes despite their shots very much being blocked and there being no blood. Anyway Queen Metalia has the crystal, bullshit is happening, 1000 years of darkness, you’ve seen Xiaolin Showdown, you know the drill. The remaining four Guardians get a cute little flashback of Usagi saying what she likes about them and then they give up their lives to revive her inside the dark energy blob of Queen Metalia and crystals and lights and shit happens and swords and wands are pulled out of nowhere and you know how a final boss goes, they beat it with the power of believing in themselves and shit like that. Also apparently the only difference between sealing Metalia away and killing her is hitting the giant bullseye on her forehead so yeah, hopefully she’s down for good this time. I don’t want to complain because this show was genre-defining but it’s hard to find things to say about something so generic and milktoast, it’s the Seinfeld problem where there’s been so many more interesting iterations that it’s just kinda “get on with it already” at this point. The only real markedly noticeable thing about it is how plainly and unashamedly it is about being a power fantasy for teen girls, and there’s something to that, harmless power fantasies can be fun but it just feels like the physical mechanics of this kind of progression being “She feels this shit REALLY HARD” is less exciting than some of the alternatives

Durarara!!: It’s the big Masaomi backstory episode and we get the whole deal of how he formed the Yellow Scarves and got into a relationship with Saki because Izaya wanted to orechestrate a gang war because that’s what Izaya does all day is orchestrate gang wars. It’s kind of amazing how many kids in this show are like “I don’t know how it happened but one thing led to another and suddenly I was at the head of one of the largest gangs in the city” like they kinda really yadda yadda over how that actually happens. But anyway Saki gets hurt in the gang war and Kadota’s gang has to save her because Masaomi’s adrenaline wears off at the last second and he can’t try and rush in and save her. I mean Dota’s van got there first anyway so how much he’d have been able to help would be doubtful but he feels bad about not even being able to try and Izaya says that fear and failure of his past will dominate his future actions which is exactly what he’s doing by letting his paranoia and frustration lead him to a war on the Saika army. Dota-chin tells him to face up to it and stop running or live with the shame of lying to Saki but Masomi can’t do that and his shame and determination to reverse the situation leads everyone into chaos as Anri discovers his secret.