#toaugment

[grieveme]

jayce has fallen asleep in his lab ; a common enough occurrence early on in their partnership, and one that viktor suspects persists into present day even if he's no longer around to witness it. he'll berate the man for it later — if the machine herald can sneak his way in, so could someone else. for now, viktor is content to simply watch the man, the gentle rise and fall of his shoulders where they're slumped over jayce's worktable. ( he's going to be sore, later. ) content, until he no longer is ; without permission from the rest of him, viktor reaches a hand out to brush a lock of dark hair behind jayce's ear. then, a hiss and a click, and mask-free lips press a kiss against a slumbering temple. despairingly soft, full of affection and yearning viktor can no longer spare his love whilst he's awake to accept—or reject—it.

tired and exhausted. real question is, when has he not been? the demands had been getting more and more tedious by the council, sometimes near unachievable for the time slots they had give him and @toaugment. shoulders don't look as strong as they once were, the grip with his hands are loosening. it's only a temporary moment of respite, he tells himself. here he rests his head upon viktor's good thigh, eyes a little distant. what happens when the council takes and takes and takes until there's nothing left for them to give? suppose they'll know when they get there. now the head turns away, looking into the mess of his lab and the taunting glow of the hexcore looking right back. brows furrow, rolling out a sigh that had been stored in the lungs. " what else would you think they would make us do? " it's rare to hear him sound so defeated but one could suppose playing puppet and chosen mouth piece could really wear on a guy.

given the question, he was only met with silence rather than an inquisitive answer he was expected to receive. he frowns, unable to tear his gaze away from the hexcore, where it glows it also dances. runes shift in the same rhythm of a heartbeat, hissing with dissonant whispers that he's not sure it connects with this reality or not. has it always been that way? like viktor knew with his rising anxiety and curiosity, a hand combs through his hair, even tucking it behind his ear. mimicking his actions does the core ease and revert back to previous behavior: lazy floating with nothing remarkable. it does calm him down but doesn't ease the interest that sparkles in hazel eyes. " did you see that? ... has the hexcore always reacted like that? " and when he moves to sit up, the hand still messing with messy brown strands pushes his cranium down again with such force he never expected viktor to exert.

' it's fine. you're just imagining things. ' at least ... it's what he thinks he heard. the voice is muddled and muddy, like head being held underwater. with a hand that showed much strength is going back to combing careful fingers through his hair; and that the feeling of lips pressing into his temple does it force a sort of shell shock. finally deciding to look face to face, the only visual he sees is viktor's face muted and blacked out, similar to that of a drawn scribble to hide what they don't want to see. eyes widen and this time when he makes an attempt to escape, the same hand moves to clasp around his throat. it tightens and does his fingers try to pry and pull that hand away; teeth grit, struggling to breathe. " what wrong with you? let me go! viktor! " the tone almost sounds like a whine, even kicking his feet to try and gain any momentum. it doesn't work.

and when the sight of viktor's free hand reaches towards his eyes with its intent to pluck them free does he suddenly lurch up, trying to get the air back in his lungs as he hyperventilates. hands pat over his bearded face and fingertips gently tap at his eyelids. with confirmation in order, he scours the room for any changes; it's back to its filled, adjusted emptiness but nothing really out of order. then when he turns around, there he sees viktor in all his glory, unmasked. it nearly startles him out of his stupor. swallowing a large lump in his throat, he subconsciously shrinks away rather than be reactionary and on the defensive. the fact that he's in his lab, in piltover alone, should be enough for him to be on high alert. although, for the moment, he doesn't care. " v - viktor? what the hell are you doing here? i thought ... " however, it's hard to ignore the lingering feeling of something soft against his temple.

then, trying to ease the situation a little bit, he can't look at him for long hoping the hexclaw would just beam straight through his heart. he's lightheaded, spotting the blueprints that acted as uncomfortable pillows. i dreamed of you again, this time in a nightmare. this is my third one this month. " surely you didn't come here to steal my eyes, right? "

[hextehcnsfw]

kissing your partner after they've given you head.   one here for good measure B)

his moans aren't quiet, shoving his face deeper and whining like he can't get any closer, or unable to meld their flesh and bones together until they're one. around his mouth is drenched, running down the corner of his lips that soak right into his beard and runs down his neck. all the while he maintains eye contact, even if the look is begging to eat him whole, begging because he's so close. hips continue to rut into the sheets below, a little more frantic than before that hints to his end. well, not until he feels @toaugment cumming first, which is almost enough for himself to finish but it's not quite enough. it's desperation now, sucking viktor's cock with a need, practically nuzzling further into him and forces those metal thighs to squeeze around his ears, perhaps choke if he was precise enough.

close. he's so close. almost there—

he was so concentrated on himself, viktor's words went mute, in one ear and out the other for almost whiny stop and that's enough. it was to the point where he pulled, not so kindly, at his hair and into a kiss. a near high started to disescalate, not exactly to the tipping point like he expected. " wait, i wasn't— " so he whines, a protest to let viktor know he didn't cum, it was completely prevented and maybe he knew that, maybe he didn't, but his retaliation is a brutal kiss in return. acting fully like it was his cunt, tongue shoved in his mouth even though his partner had fully initiated it to begin with. now viktor has his own taste in his mouth and one that is so fully jayce. instead, now he ruts right into viktor's cunt, despite still being clothed, lips immediately go to kiss at the cool metal of his neck, even if he can't feel it. he's breathless, not letting himself inhale the air missing from his lungs.

" let me cum again inside you. — please? will you let me? you'll let me, right? " then he gets angry, remembering a little something that viktor said earlier, which was the cause of this whole ordeal to begin with: jealousy. " do you let your other partners do this to you? " teeth grit, glancing up through sweat soaked bangs. even with a hint of a whine in his voice, an edge grows to his words. " do you let them cum inside you? i'm the only one, right? right? tell me, viktor. "

[hatefooled]

fmab verse....... extreme taboo gang.......... automail bits for days...............

u ever just get so consumed by grief and desperation u automail ur entire body...

[officrnolen]

🔥🔥🔥 gimme a few

Send me a “ 🔥 “ for an unpopular opinion.

1.The intense hatred Maddie gets from the fandom is frankly incredibly bullshit and insane. If it was just because of the spy thing and being from Noxus, she wouldn't get half the amount of hate purely because of the existence of Ambessa. And a large part of that hate comes from her getting in the middle of CaitVi who were gonna be canon anyway people tripped way too hard.

2. EVERY SINGLE PERSON (minus probably Ekko and Isha) HAS DONE SOMETHING FUCKED UP. THEY HAVE. Whether they live in Zaun, Piltover, Noxus etc. They have. Accept it. My girl support martial law and nearly killed Caitlyn. It's true. And everyone else's muses have done something problematic as well. Accept it and move on.

3. A non Arcane thing, fancy graphics aren't the end all be all. They shouldn't dictate your experience. And people shouldn't look down on people for having simpler ones rather than these grand intricate graphics. It's dumb and elitist.

[mercless]

Where once they would have jeered at a mortal tricked into servitude by devilish acts, Talon cannot help but let the strings of their chest tumour pull at their lips. Taught and pitying. Wandering eyes never steer far from the animated claw, inspecting it in turn with head canting from side to side. "Can't help the speculations that be gnawin' at my mind, over what inspired you to strive in this field." After pausing a moment, an outstretched, ignited hand reroutes to the collar of their overcoat, adjusting how it sat on their shoulder. They meet his eyes with his turn, but find the contents atop the workshop counter more curious as they continued their answer. "Clockwork Angels were once the things of myth, renewed now with one galavantin' over open plains. A husk to shelter the divine without a home."

Talon's searching pauses, watching Viktor instead for a reaction to their words. They do not wait long, for the anticipation would make them queasy. "Been wondering what angel blood would be worth to you, Doctor. Or if your work went no further than caging weary, mortal souls."

❛ it goes. ❜ it isn't his work anymore. viktor wanted to give the wretched a second chance at life. longevity. eternity, even. mordekaiser wants tin soldiers to reign over. nevertheless ... ❛ what i'm capable of mortal medicine can only dream of achieving. ❜ words of hubris, but delivered in such a bitter tone its clear the doctor's been well and truly punished for it.

there's no room to entertain in the workshop. there's a single stool, but viktor claims it for himself. he stretches out his leg, fiddling with a brace that wraps around his calf and thigh. whilst his attention is seemingly elsewhere, the metal claw at his back turns to the stranger, as though regarding them. there's a white glow, dimming then brightening, where the three talons meet.

❛ you've come this far, knowing what i do. ❜ it's not a question. viktor lifts his gaze back to the stranger, eyes narrowed in consideration. ❛ —why? ❜

[rcknrs]

" it is. " a grunt, dismissive and unperturbed by the macabre scene that was his bloodied frame. gruesome would be the first thought of many — followed by feelings of disgust, horror, disturb. any plethora of similar emotions. though rictus felt nothing. perhaps pity for the monumental failure of the stranger as they'd dragged themselves away, barely breathing, or a simmering delight with the opportunity to enact violence; something that, while not bred into him, had become a welcome comfort over the years. something that came to him as easy as breathing. no remorse weighed down burly shoulders, nor did regret hang heavy in his heart.

the act was more vicious than he would typically lean towards, quick and clean often being preferred: however a scene must be made. a display for all to see. divulging scornful gazes with the ruthless might of general medarda and her warband. if left unchecked, zaunites would grow comfortable in their belief of their capability for an uprising. a futile endeavour, and one that should be quashed before it has the opportunity to blossom.

always a man of few words, rictus' brow raises inquisitively at the man stood before him. posture languid in his confidence, he does not speak again, but the quirk of his brow is a silent question in itself: ' what do you want? '

" that's a lot of blood. " @toaugment

[mercless]

What are you the patron of?

patron saint of horror

you're the patron saint of the dawning moment of realization. the patron saint of comprehension, maybe. the patron saint of understanding. the patron saint of knowing exactly what's going to happen. of seeing clearly. of not being able to look away.

tagged by: @gildedmatron . tagging: @fearsgod, @toaugment, @mistcursed, @carmencxgni, & you, if you wish .

[biolightning]

the good the bad the baffling, arcane s2 sure had it all! anyway, im probably gonna try to be here as well now that the rpc is bound to revitalise, but also i got mad and ended up making a viktor blog thats decidedly not arcane compliant if anyones interested lmao @toaugment

[ofweave]

gale is gonna be on a hiatus until [to be added] but while i still have the energy to care about smth, league and arcane writers may find me on my zeri blog @biolightning or viktor @toaugment.

[grieveme]

how does your muse handle losing control ? what simple things does your muse find joy in ? how does your muse handle the duality within themselves ? how does your muse react to emotional manipulation ? >:3c does your muse lead others effectively ? how does your muse navigate justice & mercy ? is your muse the jealous type ? are they possessive ? ik this is a lot but.. just one more… how does your muse handle harsh criticism ?

how does your muse handle losing control ?

this def applies to different scenarios: 1. he doesnt do well when it comes to scenarios when theres other bodies involved, u saw what happened in the council room and him being basically volun - told that hes part of the council now theres a million thoughts going thru his mind and he immediately gets overwhelmed and stressed that it turns into anger because he doesnt know how else to cope with those emotions, esp angry because no one will listen to him (sex is separated and a different topic all together). 2. in terms of science, hes the type of guy to be deflated and loses self esteem but doesnt give up, however hell try and push back if those are under threat so rly it just depends fully on the scenario and those involved

overall tldr anger is the primary emotion that pushes forth when what or who he loves is put in jeopardy and out of his control and will fight for it back as u see throughout the show i dont need to give examples

what simple things does your muse find joy in ?

other than hextech and science, he finds joy in art and loves creating it its something his mother tried to push on him when he was younger to distract from the rune and magic as a whole (it didnt work) but hes naturally talented in that. and sweets too he likes sweets specifically chocolate and u know what hell yeah sure the whimsical the magical he also finds joy in others happiness but not at the expense of his own

how does your muse handle the duality within themselves ?

hes not even aware that there is a duality until its challenged much like how he promised that hextech would not be weaponized for viktors sake that he promised he would destroy the hexcore but didnt so its like a constant push pull and tug of war over the duality of constantly wanting better for the ppl he swore to make better vs not wanting to lose / helping those hes rly close to; a lot of has to do with his selfishness which if u argue with him hes not allowed to be because if he does hes ridiculed or reprimanded and is always second guessed by those of higher authority so when he makes those selfish desires its of his own pure choice whether or not theres severe consequences, he doesnt think he acts

how does your muse react to emotional manipulation ?

he wouldnt notice at first truly believing they rly see the good of what hes doing and taking that advice with stride; itd go over his head until those pieces slowly start connecting and at that point its been a little too late for him to properly react, just like above he would be angry and flabbergasted and annoyed at how he could fall for it and it makes it even worse ESP when that person is of higher standing and knows how to use their words to make it sound honeyed and knows how to tickle his brain to make the offer or statement think hes doing the right thing (but if u see him being emotionally manipulated by the machine herald dont tell him hes exactly where he wants to be)

does your muse lead others effectively ?

he might as well be a natural born leader, he demands attention when it the scenario demands it and he commands the room with bolster. uve seen it weve all seen it and since ppl are absorbed by the attention he holds he absolutely does hold them effectively but again hes a scientist theres a limit to what he can do but like ,, he doesnt want to be a leader here he is tho leadering but he cant be a leader in bed smh

how does your muse navigate justice & mercy ?

the opinions for others are constantly changing and his opinion can be swayed if the facts are shown plainly in his face for example zaun is not a priority of the right of its citizens and is a low priority but because viktor exists he forces himself to care however hes associated viktor with piltover for so long he forgets and sees the ppl of zaun as an enemy purely because thats what he was taught and then facing the reality that these ppl that are fighting are children which comes in with justice and mercy. its justice to fight back against the ppl coming from zaun but then the mercy that these are just every day ppl and children no less; this definitely goes above with facing the duality of oneself

its also like ,, VAGUELY MOTIONS HANDS AROUND doing what u have to and what u believe is right even if it tears a piece of ur soul out and mercy when u realize that ur in that position of power to those under him DOES THIS MAKE SENSE

is your muse the jealous type ? are they possessive ?

well i know u were probably waiting for this one but unlike viktor he is the jealous type but its not shown very well; he gets subtly irritated, he places things down heavier than hes meant to, theres an ache in his chest and being so selfish of no stay around me i want to hear ur voice but he only gets like this with ppl that he has a deep emotional bond with can u guess who but its mainly whenever viktor tries to seclude himself and recluse but it gets worse when he becomes the Defender:TM: and is actually jealous of viktors sexual partners the insecurity runs deep esp after he left to go back to zaun he definitely wouldnt feel things so strongly if that didnt happen BUT at the end of the day he can only blame himself for it

they are possessive not so much pre defender hes possessive more of his items and not ppl in particular thats just not how he rolls but the Defender:TM: is absolutely defensive link being possessive and jealous together and thats his vice but only when it pertains to viktor in particular absolutely possessive where he has inward thoughts of dont touch him, dont look at him etc call it yet another insecurity funny how jayce is very confident in himself and those around him but it all falls apart when he plays the role of the defender

ill be real i dont even think he even counts his obsession and possessiveness as a thing thats actually wrong with him doesnt even consider it if someone called him out for it itd be like 'what no im not' yes u are bro

how does your muse handle harsh criticism ?

yeah he handles it quite well and with grace doesnt take them as personal attacks; he learns from them sure theres some doubt that lingers but if anything hes stubborn and will get up to try and try again until he gets it right and learns from it so hes a trooper just dont be rude in ur delivery and he wont be a bitch in reply

[hextehcnsfw]

❛ —excuse me? ❜ pause. viktor flicks his eyes over his partner's features, looking for any sign of genuine reluctance or distress — only to be met with a playful quirk of his lips, a challenge in his eyes. very well. not so eager to please and quick to heel, then. gloved fingers trail up jayce's chest and settle atop his throat, not yet pressing down but a firm weight against his trachea ; a promise. ❛ would you care to repeat that? ❜

okay, maybe he should've communicated with him beforehand but he's long been exasperated and annoyed; he needs the roughness, the tight grip. not because of viktor particularly, no. even with his leave of the council, they're still rather demanding and ignorant of what was truly transpired these years. normally, he would immediately drop to his knees and kiss up his legs and nestle himself in the warmth of his cunt until he's told to stop. normally, he would grind his cock into his clit and whine, pleading to fuck him. and normally, he would do anything he said and anything he demanded without a second thought, because he's a good boy who does what he's told. this time around he's much less afraid and all too fearless for the reprimands he would receive in retaliation. he's still dressed, a rare occurrence when he's settled on his knees in front of him; a home. his slacks are tight with obvious arousal, he tries to look bored and rather... unentertained but the only thing he looks is hopeful.

even so, lips are pouting and back is stiffened, biting back sound to prevent the gasp slipping from just the mere feelings of his fingers crawl up his chest, tantalizing and teasing. the instinct to fall into that headspace so easily comes but he forces it back, but nagging at the back of his mind. " what, all that hunk of metal made you deaf, too? " teeth grit, legs squeezing together to gain some friction against his own cock. the desire to beg comes quickly but goes slowly, opting for something else to get a reaction. instead, he plays into it and touches himself, squeezing his cock and rubbing into his palm upon feeling the hand around his throat. lips part, nearly stopping immediately at just the feel of the presence on his throat. " hah... " defying viktor may not be something he often does but right now, it's all he wants. mouth pulls into a grin, the one he uses on investors with his winning charm. however, it doesn't quite meet his eyes from how glazed they seem to be. he even leans into viktor's palm, as a way to say: do it, you know you want to. keep that threat of a promise.

he swallows back a moan, his other hand slowly sliding up his thigh to pull at the hem of his pants. he even gives it a slight tug, like he has the audacity to ask for it despite going against the general motion of routine. " i said, make me. ... do you need me to repeat it again, viktor? "

[svellsongur]

the mythology of the freljord lends itself to a hardy people, governed by the basest nature of man, scavengers as much as warriors. were this robot ( for nunu has only heard tell of these man-made creations from those frequent sailors who rule the ports, he knows little of their constitution, and is only delighted that such a thing might exist at all ) any unluckier, there is little doubt as to the less fortunate fate awaiting it. though the teeth of the beast's caution do not relent, the boy is far too eager to approach.

" wow , you can talk ! see willump, i told you. he's friendly. " the yeti, seeing his warning settle ineffective, grumbles in discontent response as it curls into itself. the boy pays him no mind. " my name is nunu, and this is willump. you can stay in the cave with us until the storm dies down. we don't mind. "

except we do mind, the beast seems to protest, crouching down low as he dares pull his gaze from viktor to nunu. send it away, nunu. he is met with but a shake of the head, a seal upon further contest of this newest addition to their party. the boy draws closer, emboldened by the protection of his stalwart companion, which creeps along the cave floor as though to dare the thing to betray his ward's trust. " viktor, are you hungry ? i have bread if you want some ... wait, do robots even eat ? "

there's time but for a most rudimentary assessment : viktor is going to die. he's too sluggish and stiff - limbed to win a fight against this beast. still, some human survival instinct overrides the machine logic, and the cave fills with the high keen of the hexclaw as it readies the laser once again — only to sputter to a stop, the angry orange light dimming out before reaching its apex. a — child?

a new variable so unexpected it throws the whole equation off. there's a beat, and when viktor doesn't find himself a heap of shredded metal at the tail end of it, he allows himself to reassess the situation. the cave. a ( human? ) boy. a beast, certainly, though perhaps not one quite as animalistic as viktor had first assumed. unwilling to take his eyes off the creature, he inclines his head in the boy's direction.

" yes — something like that. " viktor doesn't think this is the time to explain the distinction between a cyborg and a robot. behind his mask, his eyes flick over the claws and teeth still very much on display. " my name is viktor. i am … very far from home, " is what he settles on eventually.

" i apologise for entering your cave uninvited. i was seeking shelter from the storm, and wasn't aware it was already occupied. "

[grieveme]

their work waits for no fool, on april first or any other day of the year. alas, there simply is no time for elaborate pranks. however, were jayce to take inventory, he would find that the number of man of progress merchandise in the lab has increased by a rather alarming amount. joining the infamous mug, there are now: a water bottle, a keychain, an embroidered towel, a canvas bag, some coasters, a ... hat?, and a poster taking up a good third of their blackboard. also a twin of the aforementioned mug, the jayce-likeness of this one sporting a lovingly rendered beard and moustache and currently filled with sweetmilk as it dangles from viktor's fingers, half-forgotten in favour of transcribing rune combinations. into a man of progress notebook.

" so, v, i was thinking— " and here he comes, walking in with no prior warning and approaching @toaugment all while keeping his eyes glued down at the papers of schematics shown to a vaguely interested, and lack of enthusiastic, council. fingers hurriedly flip through the pages, not even bothering to look up because, to him, this is the same lab as before with surely no extra additions. surely. now he only stands a few feet from him, placing a hand upon the desk as his intense stare stays on the words of winkled pages. " what if we didn't use ionian metal as the foundation? it might be more practical, but it's thinner than what we were going for. demacian is a lot sturdier but lacks polish. it works perfectly for what we have in mind. " if there was a decrease or increase of a time limit given by said council, he didn't speak it, far too focused on the current situation.

fingers continue to flip and flip until he finds the right one, placing it right beside the man of progress notebook. focused, he was, until he saw the talis house symbol on the corner and the intricate red leather binding. that had put a screeching halt on his thought process. " viktor... what— " confusion is obvious, pulling the book away from the transcribing, regardless if there was a voice of protest. just had to make sure he was seeing things right and it was, sure enough, this god damn man of progress merchandise. and finally looking at his partner in the face since he walked into the room, he was met face to face with a mug with his face on it, likeness or not. only he really used those tacky mugs, never would he thought viktor would use it as well. brows furrow, lips parting to say something but the more he took a look around, the more he saw his merchandise littered about. and seeing the blinding color of white on the blackboard, it's a surprise to his face plastered right above the schematics and formulas, as if it was just recently placed there.

this was like the horror house of mirrors, except it's only man of progress goods that was pushed upon him. sure, whatever makes the citizens of piltover happy, even if it aids their funding and sponsors. groaning, a hand covers his face before turning away from it and looking right down at viktor from between his fingers. deep breaths... lips press together, shoulders slumping. he's not annoyed, no. exasperated? yes. it only connected that even though it, was indeed, april first, it took a moment to connect that it was april fools. days blur together but not for his partner, it seems. and it's rather impressive, too. must've gotten his hands on the samples of these products to put on display. cheeky bastard. the words to tease are lost on his tongue, breathing out a chuckle before blossoming in a full chest of laughter.

" alright, v. you got me. " there, he slumps in his seat right next to viktor, amused. " where the hell did you find this stuff? i thought i locked it away where it would never see the light of day again. " and so he reaches for the keychain that hung from the lamp above to see the talis house symbol on this one as well. thankfully it wasn't another rendition of his face. eyes go back to the mug, tracing the facial hair before lips press together in thought and fingers rubbing the five o'clock shadow of his jaw and mouth. he smiles, a little too cocky but playful nonetheless. " do you think i would look good in a beard? ... hm, should i grow it out? "

[grieveme]

are you drunk ? OKAY NO this is the last one

yeah, let viktor laugh, let him mock at the defender of piltover being absolutely sloshed and for what reason? he hasn't entertained galas, parties, or celebrations for some time unless forced as a plus one. making it to zaun as a drunk is a skill but what if he said he got drunk at one of these bars while waiting for a certain herald that wasn't home at the moment. it's pathetic, yeah; never catch him in a situation such as this but... he needed to see him. whether it was him gutted with being hung by his own gore or the feeling of his finger tips against his scalp to soothe, he's pleased for either. he still feels the ghost of seductive fingers brushing across his shoulders and the push up of breasts for a hopeful lay later it was such an easy shrug off. feelings are very reminiscent of someone who crawls back to an ex - partner all because they miss them — wait no, this is exactly what this was.

i hate you, i hate you, i hate you. is what he wants to tell himself but he's still so in love with a love reminiscent to the moon in the sky; bright when it's dark and out of reach.

deciding it was enough with several different drinks and shots in his system, he comes back to viktor's place, stumbling and head swirling. in the midst of green fog, some signs and streets look similar but somehow he made it without falling face first or throwing up in an alley and being unable to function from intoxication. it was easy to enter, and there he was, in all of his metal glory. it leaves a bad taste in his mouth but he wasn't here to ridicule viktor in getting rid of those aspects that he admired wholeheartedly. " viktor... " he manages to slur out, unfocused and feeling separated from his body entirely but seeing him sinks him back into reality, only for a moment. the mutter of his name sounds so relieved, finally able to relax upon approaching him.

he reaches for his gloved hand to gently hold his masked cheek to place a passionate kiss right upon it. he wished it were his lips instead, he wished it were other things, but he'll settle on anything that is so incredibly viktor.

until @toaugment asks, " are you drunk? "

when he pulls away, he's panting and watching the way the plate fogs up and his own eyes are glassy and cheeks flushed. his weight stumble and leans into the herald to keep his balance and remain upright. he can't help but smile slightly, dopey and uneven, even hair falling a little in front of his eyes. " yeah... janna, i missed you, v. " it doesn't even matter if he does or does not feel the same, numb to a sense of rejection right now. laugh it up. mock, scorn, it doesn't matter, he's ready for harsh words to come his way. ( soften up. yearn, crave, it doesn't matter, he's ready for pity to come his way. ) a hand rests upon where a hexcrystal lightly buzzes in his chest, fully leaning into him. " i'll leave soon, just let me... " and he leans into kiss him again, the taste of metal on his lips warm and cold all the same. his other hand grabs viktor's metal one to place it upon his hips, an excuse to pull in closer.

" tell me what you've been up to. " then his head tilts, humming softly then kissing down the side of his mask. you've been missing me too, i can tell — is what he wants to say but keeps quiet, looking at the disfigured mirror of his face. however, he's so intoxicated that it's hard to discern whether it's him and not a shadow of his former self. " other than developing tools to blow up piltover. " morbid curiosity.

[grieveme]

a warmth blossoms in his chest, the chalk slips free with little care as the pink tone raises higher upon his cheeks. suddenly the lab is just the background and all he can intake is viktor's face and the chill of the night. when he feels warmth caressing his cheek, it's instinctual with the way he immediately presses into it, eyes closing. warm... safe. arms wrap around his waist, fingers messing with the hem of viktor's vest and the backs of his pants. hardly even notices the way he's looking at him, tilting his face in a way to gently kiss at his palm, then working his way up his arm, shoulder, and pressing into his neck. doesn't do anything else, just inhales deeply and squeezes him tighter. he groans. head is still swimming and can barely form a coherent sentence but he tries anyways.

" mm'hm... got tired of tryin' t'be pawned off as a bachelor, " he mutters, nuzzling further into him. " salo kept tryin' to shove drinks into my hands and pressured me to drink them while talkin' about hextech. several glasses... i think. i can't quite remember. he found it too funny when i started to slur my words. asshole. " all the while, as viktor suspected, being shown around like a shiny prize the councilors had acquired. some potential sponsors had several genuine questions he was more than willing to answer, however others found him as someone to gain into family as a suitor. " i'm not some trophy. " he's huffing, accidentally speaking those thoughts out loud. he doesn't bother to correct himself. and he didn't even realize he started to gently sway them both, a small dance in their own private company.

dizzy and unfocused, eyes are finally open and half - lidded as he lets himself relax, head resting with a pleasant buzz. " mm... so what did you do while i was away? i saw you workin' on something. " then he grins, chuckling silently himself. " too distracted t'get those equations right. " deciding to change the topic, there's a question that lingers with far already knowing the answer but he can't help but ask anyways, voice quiet. " come with me to the next one. just the one. " @toaugment, continued from here.

[grieveme]

❛ would you fall in love with me again if you knew all I’ve done — the things I can’t undo? I am not the man you once knew. ❜ ik the cas and lare drafts keep piling up but this song is so Them 😔

another one of those days. should he be embarrassed that he retreats to zaun just to see an old partner, in multiple senses of the word. once originally coming down for illegal research and experimentation for hextech now turns to the visitations of one of its founders. ironic how things fall sometimes. now the mask is off and oh how he wants to say you're just as beautiful as the day i lost you. unfortunately, emotions for such as those were pushed right down because neither can house them for long; like a small sanctuary in a heavy snow storm, that isn't their home anymore. however, sometimes the fleeting words of love pass by each others lips, wrong words at the wrong time.

and so it goes, continuing for the future to come.

brows furrow, perplexed and surprised by the question. it was such an easy answer, he wondered why even viktor asked it in the first place. except, he doesn't say anything, lips pressing together. it's not as simple as a yes, but there's more to it. thoughts that haven't been processed and emotions that refused to be recognized, being blanketed comfortably in his own denial. right now was not the time to face them. his own wall has been built to protect that, having accepting it from long ago when they were both such successful scientists you couldn't see one without the other, not without himself making a constant, forceful reminder of viktors very existence and contribution. sometimes a hole gets poked through and some of those feelings flood into such grievance and nostalgia for what could be.

it was such an easy answer... and yet, why couldn't he? he looks towards viktor with a yearning he hasn't felt for anyone else, a plead that mirrors the past, and a softness that allowed itself still to fester. it's said in a way of please listen. he couldn't handle another rejection, regardless how well those walls were fortified. and even with all that's built to protect himself, and the heart that suffocated on his sleeve, it still bleeds from the eclipse beaming over the sun in the sky.

" viktor, i'd fall in love with you over and over if i could. any timeline that exists, i'd come and seek you out. my life isn't the same without you. " and maybe it was selfish to say it, but that's all he ever is, a selfish man. " who cares if you can't undo it? i'd give us anything to work together, in a lab, again. i miss you because you're you, no matter how many changes you make to your body or the pieces you try to separate from yourself less human. " then he exhales so deeply, like he's held a breath for so long, maybe in anticipation. who knows. " you're not the man i once knew sure but your name is still viktor, right? " eyes wander away from his face, the words caught in his throat for a moment. " as long as you still think of me, i'd love you. and even when you forget and push me away completely, i'd love you even then. i'll be pissed at you, sure but... " should he even be saying these things? this wasn't the time but this was good as any. there's no room for happy endings here, they both know this. perhaps, just for the moment, they can both be stripped from their titles of the machine herald and defender of tomorrow into something more vulnerable.

reality is waiting right outside the door, he just doesn't want to open it yet to let it back inside.

" maybe, in another world, i'll be right by your side down here or you stay with me in piltover until we grow old and make these cities a better place to live. " hands wring into one another, out of nervousness or becoming anxious, he's not sure. the bags under his eyes are darker than the past, some greys appearing in well kept hair, and beard trimmed, deciding to letting it finally grow out just a little bit. exhaustion is evident, both accustoming to constant demands and trying to push viktor back down to zaun whenever he infiltrates. he's rude now, impatient, insensitive, and haughty. all he wanted to do was a be a scientist and help people. then viktor came in and slowly changed his mindset to being unable to live life without him, hextech be damned. " you already know i'd do almost anything for you, loving you is just always at the top. kicking your ass is second. " it's a joke but his eyes don't meet it. his hand grabs viktor's metal one and presses his lips against the cold bite of it.

" and would you still fall in love with me regardless of what i did? i could've let you die but i didn't. i tried to keep up with the demands of the council and the attention of the lab, but i failed. and, besides, who else would challenge your ideals? no one in piltover and zaun — no, in all of runeterra, is as smart as us. " i fucked up, is what he wants to say but he bites it back. this isn't an apology. " and if i'm the only one that feels this way, so be it. " shoulders slump, letting his hand fall from his finger tips. " anyway, you asked, so i answered. " time to let reality back in and remind them what they both were: enemies, two people who could no longer see eye to eye. that thought no longer squeezes his heart to the point of bursting but there's an occasional mourning.

egotistical to think, probably, but even he knows that he won't leave viktor's head, even if he wishes he does. the feelings are mutual, so he adopts those instead. rub it in his face for what viktor can't and won't ever achieve. you won't ever get rid of me that easily, even if i have to come down to zaun and force a recollection. only when they're both old and grey will he let it slide but they're not yet. there's still time. " reprimand me, if you want. "