#to that friend i am sending u so much continual love rn for everything ur doing for me

[izzy-b-hands]

my life is finally changing for the better and it's bc I'm finally letting myself accept help (to be repaid asap ofc bc im still Me akdnfjfng)

and like. admit and accept that i will have to be a slight burden or more for at least a brief period of time on the ppl i care abt who care abt me and it's bc they care abt me that they're doing that and ahhhh!!!!! (good ahhhh!)

Therapy (and more importantly, all of my friends including the one helping me hugely to make these changes) was/were/are right!!!

I can't wait!!! Can't believe it took my brain this long to understand the concepts enough to let them work to a benefit instead of...not that lol, but!!! finally!!!!!

[sweetheartsaku]

SAKUUU CONGRATS ON 200 MY LOVE!! I say this to everybody, but I mean it more than any other time I've said it, you deserve every single one of those 200 and many, many more!! AAAAAH I'M SO SO HAPPY FOR YOU!!

you're such a genuine writer, and I could tell that the things you write are just so you, yk? 🙇🏻‍♀️ that's what makes you special over anyone and everything else!! from your short smau's to the tooth rotting sweetness of the headcanons you write, I've expressed my love for all of them because they're just so good?!?!?? AND because I could tell you're the one that wrote them and I mean that in the best way possible!! I feel like seeing the author through the pieces they write is such a genuine part of being a writer bc there's just something so real about it and idk how to explain it 😞😞 BUT WITH YOU AAAAAAH YOU'RE JUST THAT GREAT????

ANYWAY every time I see you interact with a follower or a moot by responding to their asks, just backs up my claim of you deserving the 200 and so much more ☝🏻 you're always so kind and sweet how could people NOT like you???? that's like impossible you guys c'mon now

you really are one of the best souls I've ever met on this planet and I could only hope that in my next life, or in another universe, if there is one, we know each other irl and we could spend every waking moment together</3 speaking of other lives, i really don't know what I could've done in my past life to deserve being friends with someone like you ☹️☹️ honestly I'd do anything and everything in the world just to return the kindness you've always treated me with ☹️

didn't mean to get too sappy there, woah LMAOZHAHAH BUT ANYWAY, I'M SO EXCITED TO SEE YOU AND YOUR BLOG GROW EVEN MORE!!!! I'll be with you through every milestone, darling!! know that i love you soooo much, MWAH!!<33

FRANNNSSS FRANS FRANS FRANNSNSSNSN :((((((( UWEHHHHHHHHHHHH thankyu soososososoos much soulmate </3 you too 😭 deserve anything good thing ever imaginable😭YOI ARE SO SWEET I CNAT DO THSI

ackkk thank you frans!!!!!!!!! i do try to make my fics as genuine ands authentic as possible so seeing someone recognize that makes me feel all lovely inside D: !!!! AAAA mayb i should start writing more lil smaus habent done one of those in a while 🤔nd one of my first fics u found was my shu one... maybeHAHAHA!! AHHH why is the extremely popular crazy talented writer FRANS TALKING ERMMMMM how else do u rthink i found u 😓(UR AMAZING WRITING AND MOODBOARD DUHH) i will continue to do my best!!! and write!!!!!!! in the most REAL way ever done!!!!

ACKKKK YOURE TOO NICE MY SKIBIDI FRANS </3 im js being that version of me ykyk where i can be cringe and free and all of the above and im super hapi so many ppl like that side of me bc i feel so 😓 accepted!!😣.i lOVE U ALL SO MUCH GANG GANG

WHY TEH FREAK ARE. U TALKING RN FRANS. ur actually beyond the word best bc words cant describe how epic and cool and sweet u are😤i too, hope in every life, universe and everything in between that were out somewhere having the time of our lives!!!!!! YOU DONT NEED TO DO ANYTHING TO DESERVE PPL☹️ ESP ME.☹️ we are just girls in a world yk 😔✊we were js meant to be friends for real!!!NOW. I WOULD DO NYTHING TO BE ABLE TO SEND ALL UR LOVE BACK BC U DESERVE IT SO MUCH U SWEETHEART!!!!

its okkkk pookie to get sappy in here yk safe space 🥰💗I TOO AM EXCITED TO SEE WHERE LIFE AND THE TUMBLR ALGORITHM TAKE UOMG!!! WE'LL BE NEXT TO EACHOTHER THE ENTIRE TIME WOOOO!!!!!! thanku love, expect the same !!!!<33 I LOVE U SOOO MUCH

[milkiane]

so i am feeling incredibly emotional rn so, here’s an appreciation post for my favorite people. (this have been in my drafts for three weeks now) -- so why not post this along with my sleepover <3 sleepover bash

@chokemepansy

need i say more? no— but i will anyway. asteria, my mean cheerleader girlfriend, you are the first moot i’ve ever had, and honestly, i wouldn’t have it any other way. you're my favorite person in the entire world, and pls i am getting so emotional rn, i hate you >:-( i’ve told you everything at my previous letters but i just want you, and everyone else who’s about to read this, to know that you’re my platonic (and quite possibly romantic) soulmate, and my other-third, because pansy owns the shit out of us. love u lots, don’t say it back <3

@accioweaslcy

my favorite headcanon writer 😩 pls alyssa, i’ve had, and still do, have so much fun talking with you. i really, really, love your company, i love your writing, and most especially love you. you were one of my moots that talked to me with such ease and comfort despite being a tad bit younger than you, and it’s been fun ! you’re like one of those seniors who befriends juniors, but still have this amazing (and envying) friendship with each other. not only that, but you being my friend, and me being a dumbass, made our own version of the golden trio with @weasleyyy ! now, this is a story i’ll tell my kids. love u, even if you choose to chomp me <3

@weasleyyy

gHAZAL ! now, are you thankful for me being a half-asleep dumbass who thought you were rose because of your similar urls before, or what ? because i definitely am PFT SJSHSJSHSJN anyways, i’m so happy to have you in my life. i’m a sucker for your chaotic and impulsive energy, and your little thoughts about the hpu. just like rose, thank you for acting just as yourself around me, a smol bisexual mess, because i really do appreciate it, and now you made me a fanclub— which btw, i still cannot get over with. i wheeze everytime i remember it. i love u, madame gazelle, even if you’re a mean li’l fuck ! <3

@amrtxntias

AAAAAAAAH heather, you are officially my unofficial soft british best friend, and no, you do not have a say in this, because you’re stuck with me forever. thank you so much for helping me with terms i need for writing. you’ve been the best, you’ve supported me through every ups and downs with my writings ever since we’ve met. it wasn’t even too long ago ! but you’ve welcomed me like i was a long lost friend of yours. love u, h, the lily to my marlene <3

@buckysbeloved

aliciaaa !! you’re honestly like an older sister i’ve never had. i’ve never had anyone to rant about my marvel fangirlings with, but i am so glad that you were so open with my rants and conspiracy theories. you’ve never judged me or shown any disinterest with my rambles, you’ve been so supportive and you continue to give me the same energy as mine. it’s a very little thing to fuss about, but lish, you’ve got to know that it means so much to me. i’m tearing up— blame the hormones. but really, i’m so grateful for you and your company (and your maxibaby fics). love u to the moon and back ! <3

@acosmis-t

isa isa isa isa isaaaa, pls i love u so much. that’s all i want to say, but ofc, i need to say more. you have been one of my best friends— we clicked the moment we spoke to each other and i was incredibly happy to be your moot. i couldn’t even believe it at first because you’re this rly cool writer with tons of followers and i’m just another user in the crowd but like, everything i want to say is beyond the words that want to come out of my mouth, so i’ll leave it with a thank you for choosing me to be one of your mutuals. thank you for blessing me, and the others, with your lovely fics. never stop doing what you love, i’m here for you always. always was, and always will be. i mean, it should be with the jointed graves and all. love u <3

@reguluscore

SOOOORINNNN. sometimes i question what’s happening inside your head. like one second your posting angsty fics and thoughts, and next thing i know you’re posting a dancing prongs gif. i’ll never understand, i reckon, but that’s alright, i’ll love you just the way you are, even if you break my heart with your angst. tell me who hurt you and i’ll beat them up. i love u so much, i’m still listening to your playlist, because it’s astronomical. sending you some forehead kisses <3

@inks-and-jinx

vivian !! i’m still beyond grateful for you and your artistic and writing talents. you’re such an angel, and i’m so incredibly happy to have you in my life. you’re a sweetheart. you’re every sweet-soft-fluffy nickname there is, because honestly? i cannot speak well, or think straight because i don’t think words can describe how lucky i am to have you. well, i love u, and that’s all i could comprehend <3

@comfortwriting

karis ! you’re honestly one of my fave moots because you never fail to make me so appreciated and loved. your out of the blue messages always make me feel so happy because you’re so wholesome and nice. i’m very, very, glad to have you in my life. thank you for always being there to be my personal therapist and my human diary— who listens to all of my writing ideas, even if i have tons of wips to write. thank you for inspiring me to write again, without you, i would’ve never find my passion for writing again, so thank you, thank you for being the sweetest person there is, i love you ! <3

@krasivayadarling

ANYA ! darling, you are one of the very first mutuals i’ve ever talked to, you’ve welcomed me with open arms when i was new here and i wouldn’t change anything in the world. i’m so glad that you were the first person i’ve ever talked to because you are practically the human form of a squishmallow. don’t question me, you’re my squishmallow. anyways, you’re such a lovely person and i’m very happy to have you in my life, love you ! <3

@cursestothemoon

cHARLY-CHAR !! hehe you are like one of those nice, cool, senior students in school, you never fail to make me so giddy and loved. i’m so happy to have you in my life, and i’m wishing you all the happiness and love in the world because you truly do deserve it, especially when you’ve been nothing but so kind and friendly. pls i feel like crying because i don’t know what i did to deserve you. I BLAME U AND UR AMAZING WRITING SKILLS FOR MAKING ME SOFT >:-( i love you tho <3 — also thank you for that play fighting blurb with fred, i didn’t know that i needed to bite his cute butt until i read it.

@sunflowergirl522

ZOE ZOE ZOE ZOE ZOE ZOE ! I LOVE YOU. i feel so complete when i read your peter fics. i always look forward to them because it’s not everyday you find someone who actually writes him so good, and i know we don’t really interact much, but i feel like i got to know you more through reading your fics. u better trust me when i say that i’ll be your personal hype woman and maxibaby supporter, because i am, and i will forever be ! love u <3

@fives-cup-of-coffee

amelia, you bitch, i love you. to be honest, i've never really expected us to be friends, but ofc, here you are, simping for me and now we're besties. you've been, and still are, so fun to be around with-- only because i get to tease the shit out of you >:-) anyways, thank you for keeping up with my utter bullshit, i'm here for you always, i hope you know that. love ya ! <3

@moonvicake

wAHH-- sasha, hi. pFT JSADHJSAHDJH SORRY BUT PLEASE I LOVE YOU, DID YOU KNOW? it's been so painfully awkward at first because believe me, i'm the most gauche person you'll ever meet if we talk for the first time, but as soon as we grow accustomed to each other, you'd wish that you never spoke to me, because i'm this hot fucking mess, so thank you for keeping up with me. you're one of my favorite mutuals in here. i love you more than puppies and hello kitty pancakes <3

+ my mutuals who’ve been such amazing people, we haven’t talked as much as the tagged moots but i love you all just as equally, you lot mean the world to me, and i’m willing to go on the ends of the earth for all of you <3

@anchoeritic @babyjordy @frankenkyleluvr @ronsbadidea @kc-needs-coffee @nevilles-top @weasleyclaw @sweetnspicysimp @redbullchick @willowbleedsonpaper @weasleysandwheezes @daffodilmoons @incorrectpeterparker @dracosaccount @cedrics-grave @pad-foots @peepeepotter @oldschoolkiddo @spideyspixies @daltonacademia @eunoniaa @love-peachh @george-fabian-weasley @mayonnaise-and-anarchy @darthwheezely @thotbutpurple @l0ttadreamz @daisyyy2516 @prettywhitedoves @band--psycho @widowdays @loveboyhalo @gxtitobxby @fandomvariousness @nothinghcppens (i passed the 50 tags rule, eek— i’m sorry, i love all of you whom i didn’t get to tag, though 🥺)

[pistolslinger]

how would i describe the mun of pis tol slinger dot tumblr dot com? i've said this a million times and i will say it a million times more until i am 96 years old but nat you are one of the funniest person i have ever met in the rpc. whether you're posting something ooc on the dash or sending something 𝓬𝓾𝓻𝓼𝓮𝓭 in the dms i just know!!! i just know that i'm going to be laughing until i get stitches! talking to you is effortless, i'm pretty sure we just skipped all the awkward first interactions that happen with most people and just dove head first into the circus and i wouldn't have it any other way. on top of that, you are also so kind and welcoming and so easily approachable and that's just the trifecta of a good rp'er imho. and not to mention your writing! every time i read your threads i'm just absolutely floored by how talented you are and how well you understand jesper. please never doubt your characterisation or the way you write him because it's an absolute joy to read everything and see what kind of ideas and aus you think up for him! you are just a bright light in the rpc, and i'm glad that our paths crossed and that we're friends 🥰

HOW WOULD U DESCRIBE ME TO UR GRAMMA?

NO BC IM TRULY GOING TO START EATING WASPS RN. juli!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i rly came into this rpc thinking i couldnt love jesper and kaz’s dynamic any more than i already did, but then U HAPPENED and now i am sobbing over them always!!!!!!  i’ve said it before a million times and i will continue hooting it NOW: ur ability to mix kaz’s sharp wit and abrasiveness with his sense of humour always has me 🥰 u don’t tone down how cutting he can be, and u always make it work in every single interaction. like, it cannot be easy writing with as many ppl as u do with a muse like kaz, who is nigh unapproachable, but u have genuinely managed to make him both easy to interact with, and FUN to build a dynamic with, and i love it SO much. and ur writing style itself is gorgeous, and u handle dialogue + improvising plots so well, i love seeing ur responses on the dash, ic / crack / anything. also, ooc, u are genuinely one of my favourite ppl i’ve met thru rp. ur so funny, so down to earth, SO DOWN TO CLOWN always. we joke about sharing a braincell, but i cant think of a better person to share a braincell with :( the only thing is, ma’am. u are way too humble for ur own good. everything u put out into the rpc, be it ur ic writing, ur graphics, ur personality n wonderful sense of humour, all of it is appreciated n loved by so many ppl!!!!!!! SO MANY!!!!!!! i wish u would give urself more credit for all the cool shit u do and how cool a person u are, bc u deserve praise for it ALWAYS. im super grateful our orbs met across the rpc...........betwixt the taco bell and COWBOY AU........ 𝖔𝖚𝖗 𝖘𝖎𝖓𝖌𝖑𝖊 𝖇𝖗𝖆𝖎𝖓𝖈𝖊𝖑𝖑 𝖜𝖆𝖘 𝖋𝖔𝖗𝖌𝖊𝖉 💖

[fuwushiguro]

OMG LUXE!

You’re Halloween costume is 10/10 love it! How are you doing? Got a Halloween party or anything?

I have not, but I did buy a Sukuna cosplay weeks ago and I only wore it once in my room after a few drinks😅

Also got any tips on finishing fics?

Like I’m stuck in this ‘deadbeat dad Toji is hot to sleep with ( and get emotional attached to even when you don’t want it to happen) , but dad Gojo would make such a good boo ( + kid Megumi is shaking my ovaries)’ phase so I keep coming up with fics, finish writing them and not continue checking them, bc it takes so much work😩 Like my last dad Gojo fics I wrote in 1 day or so, but took weeks to “check”…. Sorry for venting and this chaotic energy.

I hope you have a great evening and sending you hugs🥰 ( can’t wait to see the results of the sequel poll… like Scumbag Gojo x pregnant reader has been feeding my dad Gojo phase)

Eek hi again Shell!!

I think I pranked you guys a lil because that costume was from a couple of years ago (2018 I think??) 😭 but I'm glad you liked it!! I was meant to go to a drive in cinema last night with my friend to see the exorcist but my friend cancelled :( I'm so pissed at her I am very ready to cut her out of my life bc she pulls this shit constantly LMAO and halloween is my favourite like!!!!! ruined my whole weekend ☹

ANYWAY that sounds so fun?? I bet u looked amazing 🥰

But finishing fics advice, I don't think I can help u with that bc I write like a psycho 😭 it is very rare that I don't finish writing a fic the same day I wrote it bc I cannot stand writing fics across several days. I want everything out on a page and then I do edits after and make it how I want, I really struggle to write if I do it across a time period rather than all at once!

But no I 100% get the whole bunch of ideas things so you just wanna write all of them! I'm going through that rn. I've got a new series I'm working on. A current series I should be working on and a few collabs (one of them I'm writing rn and it is extremely overdue lmfao).

I hope you have a lovely day/evening too!! Kisses for u and I am rooting for u to get ur writing done baby I know u got this!!

I literally cannot believe which fic is winning the sequel poll rn it is absolutely insane

[lemonjoonah]

rip. drunk curious anon is thriving rn. i loved that with my whole heart. ANYWAYS, if you in the mood to indulge....... anything else u have in mond about a drunk little dove would be so greatly appreciated 🥺🥺🥺 (so SO sorry. also on another note i wanna be ur friend so bad rip)

OMG I don’t know what happened. I was just going to write a short little addition but then it turned into a 1K drabble! No regrets, but now I’m thirsty as fuck for a certain member of the flock... you’ll see why when you read this. (Knocked this out in a few hours so please forgive any mistakes!) Thank you so much for the Beastly Gods love!

Continuation of this post. and the Beastly Gods/Beastly Tales universe. 

Warnings: Alcohol consumption, manipulation (we all know Jimin is not what he puts on, and that just makes this so much worse) 

...

*Lemon sends away the rest of the flock to talk to the Little Dove one on one*

Lemon: There you’re free to answer now, they won’t hold anything against you. So... was it a lie?

Little Dove: Yes it was a lie. I was just so angry. I wanted to hurt him. I don’t regret what I said or did though. He deserves to think it might be true, and have his brothers belittle him for it.

Lemon: So what happened after that?

...

-The Previous Night-

You sway in the branch, numb to the cold air thanks to the bottle of liquor in your hand. The continued scoffs and jabs at Taehyung's expense from his brothers is music to your ears. 

“Little Dove stop this right now. Don’t make me come up there and get you!”

“Just because you feel inadequate doesn’t mean you have to go and ruin my fun.” You taunt back to your once beloved.

“Get down here now.” Taehyung growls while Hoseok loses himself to laughter clutching his side as he keels over.

“Make me!” You shout back, emboldened by the liquid spirits.

Taehyung jumps up to the balcony’s railing, his wings raised and plumed in anger. You fumble as you move further back on the branch trying to keep out of his reach though you know the attempt to be fruitless. 

When one of your feet slips on the bark, Namjoon interjects with a hand on Taehyung’s shoulder. “That’s enough, you're scaring her. If you want her down I’ll go get her.” 

“I’m not scaring her. I am trying to rein her in, she is mine, and there’s no chance I’ll let you fetch her after what you promised her last time.” Taehyung spits back at his brother.

While you watch them bicker with a level of smugness a hand reaches down from above, fishing for the bottle in your hand. “Can I have a sip?” You were so focused on the two arguing you didn’t notice that Jimin had climbed up onto the branch over top of yours. 

“Yeah...” Your voice quakes as you offer the bottle up. He grabs it and takes a swig, holding on to it on to it rather than giving it back.

“Whew, it’s strong this year. I’m surprised you're still sitting upright.”

“Let’s remedy that shall we?” You suggest trying to take the amber liquor back, but Jimin continues to hold it just out of your reach.

“I’ll give it back on one condition. We drink it together inside.” He offers with a concerned stare. “Then you can tell me all about how Taehyung was such a disappointment, but with your feet on solid ground.” 

“Fine.” You spit out eager to take another sip.

Jimin hops down and joins you on your branch and extends his hand again this time for your own. His grip is soft and delicate as it wraps around your fingers. The rest of the flock back off as he leads you back to the balcony, even Taehyung remains silent, keeping his distance. 

Despite having your feet back on the floor of the home, it by no means feels solid. The whole building in fact looks as though it’s swaying. “I-I think I need to lie down.” You mutter as Jimin steadies you.

“If that’s what you want.” He responds with a whisper. You nod and he leads you off to the bed. Normally you would object to the location, but you don’t think you can handle the hard floor of the storage closet tonight, not with the room spinning right before your eyes and your head aching as a result. You take your place sandwiched between the sheets. 

“Thank you...” You blurt out to Jimin who looks to be leaving. 

“For what?”

“Namjoon was right... I’m scared of him, terrified of what he has done, what he might do if I stay here.” 

Jimin changes direction, instead of exiting comes in closer taking a seat on the bed in front of you. His wings fan out encircling you, blocking out the view of the rest of the room. Leaving you with only him to focus on in the soft walls he’s created. “Are you afraid of me?” He asks, his hand shakes as it rises touching your cheek, but it hesitates merely an inch away. He starts to pull it back but you lean into it. A smile takes his lips as his fingers brush your skin. 

“I’m more afraid of being left alone to deal with him.” You admit, your once guarded thoughts finding their way out with your lips loosened by your intoxication and the feeling of Jimin’s hand resting against them. Your attempts to entice Namjoon into letting you leave hadn’t gone to plan, but being here, now with the shy and far less threatening Jimin, and the push from the liquid courage running through your veins. You might as well give it a shot.

“If you want me to stay I will. I don’t require anything in return.” He pulls back his hand. “Pissing Taehyung off is a gift on it’s own.” 

You sit up in the bed meeting his eyes. He looks away quickly, but your fingers take his chin and turn his sights back to you. “Would you like to piss him off more?” You ask. Jimin nods his eyes wide and his wings starting to lower around you as if in submission to your touch. “Then call him in here, and I’ll give you a reward.” 

“T-Taehyung, could you come here?” He calls out immediately at your behest. 

As soon as the footsteps near the door you wrap your arms around Jimin’s neck dragging him down into a deep kiss. The timing is almost too perfect, for just as the door creaks open Jimin loses his balance and falls on top of you.

You expected Taehyung to storm over, to pull Jimin off you and retaliate in anger. But nothing happens, he only watches as you pull Jimin down even further on to you, his chest pushing against yours while his lips obey and follow your lead. 

There’s a slight chuckle coming fromTaehyung as he starts to close the door once again, he leaves you with only a few words, but nothing of the anger you desired. “What did I say about rebellions Little Dove?”   

...

*The Little Dove has fallen into a daze, touching her lips with the tip of her finger*

Lemon: Little Dove, is everything okay?

Little Dove: *Coughs* What? Oh yes, sorry. No, nothing else really happened after the events they described earlier.  

[luvdsc]

hi miss cat! so i just recently read ur fic “august” and it was so heartbreakingly beautiful btw :”) you have such an amazing gift for writing and i hope you continue cus you’re touching a lot of people with the words and scenarios you create,, and the way i just resonate with each character especially y/n?? WOW.

august is also such a memorable and nostalgic month for me cus i met this guy (we don’t communicate anymore tho). we met thru a similar group of mutual friends at a get-together. he lived cities away from me so we usually just communicate via text or online. there wasn’t a label or anything but we would talk for days end. like it was we were “together” but not really “together” JADHHSJAAJ sometimes i would even wait and stay up late at night for him just so we could talk and he would do vice versa as well.

we met during august and i confessed to him later during Christmas Eve. turns out,, the feelings were mutual but it felt weird at the same time?? like usually we feel giddy and happy even but somehow it felt odd?? like in the back of my mind i kinda knew that this was probably gonna be the end and turns out i was right.

after our confession, we didn’t talk for awhile. at first i thought he was just busy so i just waited for him, while waiting, i would constantly message him everyday and update him on what’s been going on with me. i got to the point where i was just desperate like it was okay if he didn’t reply, just at least a “read” to all of my messages would be enough for me. so i rlly related to y/n so much in the fic :”) (btw i’m listening to august by taylor swift as i’m typing this so i’m kinda in my feels rn LMAO)

after 1737271 years, he FINALLY read them and then he blocked me in all of his socials??? LIEK?? OKAY DOUCHE?! then i heard from his friends that he deactivated after for awhile,,, and then when he came back and reactivated, i was able to messaged him again and i was just fed up and completely hurt and confused and asked him why did he block me and just ghosted me for months after everything.

GUESS WHO REPLIED?? HIS GIRLFRIEND?? I DIDNT KNOW HE HAD A GIRLFRIEND,, AND EVEN HIS FRIENDS DIDNT TELL ME ANYTHING, NOR WAS IT SPECIFIED IN HIS SOCIALS?? SO NOT ONLY AM I HURT BUT I FEL DISGUSTED WITH MYSELF?? like i would never try to ruin a relationship :// it was all just so messy.

turns out when i met him during august he was already dating someone, and during December when i confessed to him, it was also the same month of their 1st year anniversary. basically i just wanted to bury myself alive and drown in my tears at this point. it was the first time i was ever so invested in someone but in the end it felt like shit :// he was my “almost” which hurt the most cus he wasn’t technically mine? FOR GODS SAKE ALL THIS TIME I WAS THE SIDE HOE WITHOUT ME EVEN KNOWING LIKE HELL NAW IM OVER THIS😫😤🤢

we chatted a few weeks after, and surprisingly he initiated the conversation as if nothing had happened? he noticed i was being distant and cold and he was like “are u mad at me” nO I JUST RLY WANT TO PUNCH U OFF TO THE NEXT HEMISPHERE CUS YOURE SUCH A DOUCHE!!! and then he was like “i’m sorry, although I don’t really know what i should say sorry for, but yea i’m sorry” the fact that he didn’t see the reason/purpose as to why he should say sorry just makes his apology all the more meaningless 😪🤧

after that we just started fighting and that was the last time we ever talked to each other. i blocked his number and all his social media accounts, i even unfriended our mutual “friends” since i just wanted to cut everything and everyone related and connected to him completely.

but now i’m okay:D looking back, he wasn’t even worth it. it’s just a shame that he was the first person i invested all my love and time to, despite all the distance and uncertainty, that’s what i regret the most. it was also hard cus although i didn’t know about his relationship with his girlfriend i felt disgusted and ashamed of myself for awhile. like the ghosting did hurt but him blatantly lying and flirting with me despite being in a committed relationship hurt worse i can’t even imagine what his gf feels ohgod.

i’m sorry this is so long. but like i said earlier, you really have such a gift for writing and i hope that life offers you lots and lots of colorful, beautiful and fun moments in your life, like how it is in all your stories! hehe ❤️💫✨💐💐 stay safe miss cat and i’m wishing u all the best <3

hi, honey bee !! 💓 omg thank you so much for reading august and saying such nice things about it 🥺🥺💟 and you’re so sweet klashaskfdlj i’m gonna cry, thank you for complimenting my writing 😭💗💗 it makes me really happy to know that my stories can make you feel this way and that you can put yourself in yn’s shoes :’) 

oh god... reading what happened to you, i’m so so sorry that you wasted your time on such a d!ck /: he sounds absolutely disgusting, and the fact that he can’t even see where he went wrong??? also how his friends didn’t say anything?? jfc cheating is the one thing that makes me the most upset, like.... why would he do that???? if you wanna hook up with someone, break up with your s/o first. it’s a douche move, sure, but it’s the worst to cheat. you’re breaking your s/o at that point ): i’ve unfortunately seen both sides of this because of my friends, and god, i’ve seen the strongest girls get broken down because their trust is broken and they think it’s their fault and it’s just so so painful. i’m so sorry you had to go through this, lovebug ):

good on you for cutting off your mutual friends and everything associated with him. you don’t need that in your life, and i’m really happy that you’re doing okay and thriving now, sweetpea 🌸 i’m sorry that he was your first relationship ): i hope that, if you choose to try again, the next person knows how lucky they are to have you 🤍 you should not be disgusted nor ashamed of yourself, angel ): he’s the one who should be feeling those things. you didn’t know, and it’s not your fault. he hurt you and his gf, and that’s on him. (and i hope his gf dumped his sorry @ss)

and it’s okay, lovebug, you don’t have to apologize! 💞 thank you for wanting to share your thoughts and feelings after reading august 🥺💕 and thank you so so sooo much 😭💛 all my stories are based heavily on my life, so i’d say that life has indeed offered me tons of colorful and beautiful and fun moments :’) fingers crossed that i continue to receive more tho!!!! and i hope for the same for you, honey bee !!! i hope life treats you kindly and only good things come your way 🌼🌼 thank you again, lovebug, and i hope you’re staying safe and happy, and i’m sending you all my love and support 🌷🌷🌷✨

[burnedbyshoto]

if you sent any asks (recommendations for things don’t count as I have to look around!) since october 17 until october 22 it is in here :)

anon said: The header for your askbox response post is *aesthetic*. I think it’s a really good idea to post one every few days if you have the time. ❤️

well, thANK YOUUUUU!!!!! I put in a whopping 10 minutes into it because I had no idea what I was doing! i’ll definitely be doing asks this way now though.

big dick kiri anon said: !!!!!! ILY HAVE A WONDERFUL DAY PLS HYDRATE 💙💙❤️❤️ -bigdickkiri

Omg love! Please don’t worry about kinktober just breathe! Take your time and try to relax 💙❤️- bigdickkiri

DAMN, that is a LOT. Please look after yourself and don't stress about it love!! - bigdickkiri

I'm very excited. BUT PLEASE LOOK AFTER YOURSELF, DO NOT FORCE ANY OF THIS OMG - bigdickkiri

AHH, AMAZING, TALENTED SWEETHEART, GORGEOUS LOVE, HAVE A INCREDIBLE DAY AND HYDRATE - bigdickkiri

I believe I did have a good day, and I am actually super bad at hydrating, buT ILL TRY TO GET BETTER!!!!

I am breathing!!!! JUSTTT BREATHEEEE!!! I am taking my time now and relaxing to the best of my ability :D thank you so much bdk I love you with all my soul

theres always a lot, but if im not doing a lot I dont do anything so on one hand.... it’s okay LMAO but I will continue to try and not stress :D

BDK I WOULD NEVER WANT TO MAKE YOU THINK IM FORCING THIS OUT OF MEEEE ILL TRY MY BEST TO MAKE YOU PROUD

GHSOGHJIAORGJRGIRAHG YOURE AMAZING, BEAUTIFUL, TERRIFIC, INCREDIBLE!!!!!!! YOU HYDRATE AND MAKE SURE YOU KNOW THAT I LOVE YOU

@bread-theduck​ said: We love you and support you ❤ dont push yourself, your mental health is so much more important that kinktober haha. Take all the time you need, we're right here and open if you wanna talk~

I don’t really try to push myself... it just happens subconsciously D: but thank you for the love and support!!!! my mental health is stronger than I give it credit though

anon said: listen! we all appreciate you and your writing dearly but! I think we can all agree that we want you to be okay mentally and physically before you make yourself write! kinktober can wait! you’re more important!! at the very least, pls take a break for tonight.

I honestly can’t even remember when i said I was tired, but thank you for your kind words regardless!!!! I am trying to get better at it because i don’t want to disappoint you guys D:

@saintbullet​ said: Please take care of yourself!!! DONT risk your health for writing. We care about you so much! Be careful 💕💕💕

I know I push myself a lot, and i’m really sorry for scaring you all!!!! I am trying though, and it just has a lot to do with my mental fatigue and that im judging some hard classes right now then it has to do with anything

anon said: hey it'll be alright! idk whats wrong but i promise everything will work out like its supposed to! you just take care of yourself and take as much time as you need to feel better!! we love u!! ♥️

It wAS MY PERIOD I REMEMBER NOW AHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!! I LOVE YOU TOOOOOOOO WITH ALL THE LOVE MY HEART POSSES!!!!!!

anon said: periods can be a pain so pls take care of yourself!! drink lots of water and rest up!!!

my period is the worst, if she was a person i’d block her and avoid her irl!!!!!!!!

anon said: Lol ok so gay for Mina anon back and no, I was not the anon who requested it. But lmao, let me take this time to whole heartedly thank that anon for quenching my thirst anyways

oh whoops, sorry for thinking you were someone else D: iM GLAD TO SEE THAT YOU WERE HAPPY WITH IT!!! READER WAS SUPPOSED TO BE A BAD GUY BUT I COULDN’T FIGURE OUT HOW TO MAKE IT WORK LMAO

anon said: I am just planning on hanging out and reading all the lovely writing that comes from this

i’m pretty sure this is about my nsfw/sfw headcanons, and honestly im sooo very excited to start working on them!!!!!!!!

anon said: you have no idea how happy I got when I saw u posted for mina like UGH MY WIFE I LOVE HER SO MUCH 🥺🥺🥺 N GIVING US GAYS AMAZING CONTENT UR AMAZING MWAH MWAH KEEP BEING THE PERFECT ANGEL U ARE 🥺🥺💞💗💖💕💓💝

AHHHHH IM SO GLAD YOU LIKED IT MINA IS LIKE MY FAV CLASS 1-A GIRL SO I LOVE HER SO MUCHHHHHHHHHHH YOURE AMAZING AND I LOVE YOU AND YOURE AN ANGEL!!!!!!!

many a anons said: Sorry I didn’t see the part where you said not to request characters that were already on the list I thought that was the list of character we could vote for.

so sorry I accidentally sent a character in that has already been requested, Tumblr didn't show me the follow up posts ;;

nooo I didn’t see the list I’m so sorry 😭😭😭

LOL ITS OKAYYYY. y’all were hoes and kept sending me shouto who I couldn’t even think about deleting from my list... so... you are lucky >:(

anon said: hello! not a request here but take care of yourself anc stay hydrated bb 🥰🥰

I got my water right next to me rn bby :D

anon said: be todoroki’s girlfriend

bitch I am todorokis WIFE, why would I need to dress up???

@girl-with-a-mentality​ said: You can be todoroni for Halloween.

....you right...

anon said: Thirst post infoo ;3 I found a doujinshi of Bakugo being teased and toyed with sexually with by Ochako, Yaomomo, and our lovely momma Mina

...send it

anon said: GIRLLLLLL

ANONNNNNNNNNNNNN ;)

local dumbass anon said: local dumbass is here once again, i thiink you know who i am and might've found my ig buuuuuut..?

uh.... I don’t know???????? I only followed people on insta if you gave me your handle or followed me first.... also did you cut your bangs?

anon said: Your Monoma scenario was really good!If we’re being honest, though, Monoma would literally start foaming at the mouth if he saw anyone from 1-A making physical contact with his s/o, ESPECIALLY Bakugou. They would have to call animal control because there would be a rabid Monoma in the dorms lol

okay... while you’re not wrong, I just thought 18 year old monoma should have grown up just the tiniest bit! plus his obsession is controlled because of his insecurity so LMAO IDK I JUST THOUGHT MAYBE UGH

@awkward-theaterkid​ said: I was reading your Day 19 Fic but I couldnt take it seriously, the title "My Way" kept reminding me of the Backstreet Boys "I want it that way" and it keeps popping up while I read it 😂

as someone who only heard that song because of b99 I read this and immediately thought of b99 LMAOOOOO

🍒💥anon said: URGENT PSA: LYSSA IS ABSOLUTELY AMAZING AND I LOVE HER -🍒💥

Hello Queen Lyssa, I finally read "And They Were Roommates" and have absolutely no idea why I put it off so long! ITS A MASTERPIECE. Each chapter is addictive and the slow burn and angst destroyed me 😭 The smut in the final chapter is flawless and sooooooooooooooooooo H O T. Shoto wasnt even my favorite character but he might have to be now (or at least in my top 3) 😰 This is my new favorite series and I cant wait to re-read it!!!! YOURE AMAZING AND ILY. You own my soul now -🍒💥

URGENT PSA I LOVE YOU CHERRY EXPLOSION AND YOURE AMAZING :D

ATWR holds a special place in my heart uwu.... HAOGHIOSRGSIOGJSIHG THANK YOU!!!!! SHOUTO IS AN AMAZING CHARACTER WHO I LOVE WITH ALL MY HEARRTTTTTT

~ thank you to @didyoumeanme​, @kittenlordofdarkness​, @soafers​ for submitting memes and animal pics for my rommate, much appreciated :D ~

anon said: Did the local dumbass anon ever cut their bangs? Do you know?

....I dont know, but I just asked her rn >:)

this paragraph is dedicated to those surrounding to the meltdown mess that occurred yesterday. to each and every one of you who sent me kind words via my askbox or directly contacting me, thank you. I really want to move past this because I feel by holding on it will make me feel less inclined to write because of my guilt. of course, I do not expect you to forgive me, or trust me in my story of how it went down, because at the end of the day it was my mistake for trusting in someone to write with pure intentions when I didn’t know if she could. im trying to continue on with my best foot forward and im grateful for those of you who trusted in me. I swear I will never push myself again, and that I will instead take my time in order to publish my original work and only my original work and not take anything that comes from a “friend”. know that I love you all, and I dont know how to take it easy so my break lasted a whooping 10 hours, and my blog won’t discontinue until im done with bnha or...I get into medschool which is still 3 years away, I am taking care of myself, im staying hydrated, im trying not to put myself down anymore, I will keep going, & will forever continue to be more careful with what I post. also, no one was really coming for me, so don’t worry if you thought so lol. (to you 9 anons who expressed their kind thoughts to me, thank you. to big dick kiri anon thank you. to @bqkubabey​, @flayvus​, & @ultimate-shit-poster​ thank you so so much you really helped me not drown myself in my own guilt.)

anon said: i hope you’re feeling okay today :((

I am feeling a lot better. unfortuantely I did make myself really sick yesterday because ive never been as stressed in my life ever, but im okay now. there’s nothing I can do more for what happened so I will try to continue on as best as I can and I appreciate you caring... ilysm :)

@ikinabi​ said: Your writing??? Actually god sent 🥵👌 and the way you write Mirio gets me GOING

BAHAHAH NOOOOO ITS NOT PLAFUAOGHJIPRAHAR MY MIRIO PIECE YOU LIKED WAS MY FIRST PIECE ON HIM AND OOO BOY I DID NOT DO HIM JUSTICE

anon said: fuck buddy iida is a thought that has never crossed my mind but now that i’ve seen your post i am intrigued haha

well... it is up :) if you wanna check her out :)

anon said: You dont have to answer if you dont wanna but i just wanna see if your okay. I hope your end your doing well and not stressing.

i’m doing much better than I was yesterday!!! I just needed to rest and calm down and stop attacking myself. thank you for checking in!!! it means so much :,)

[heesgf]

bad boy! byounggon

a long but cute and fluffy bad boy bullet scenario :’))) pls read

this is my bullet scenario debut so im rlly gonna try and make it pop let’s get it

OK SO mr byounggon is a little bit of a bad boy, mostly because he’s not super loud, and he doesn’t necessarily make his presence known all the time... so he’s kinda just ,,, in quiet disapproval of everything

u could be laughing rlly loud with ur friends and being rlly obnoxious in the hallway but when he walks by ur kinda like.. O shit be quiet!!!212!!... bc ur not tryna have him roll his eyes at u (bc he will)

I think he’s partially so reserved bc ppl dont talk to him bc they’re scared,,, but bby just thinks ppl dont like him so he’s a lil :’((( about it

Lowkey but highkey everybody thinks he’s rlly hot!! One time a girl tried to impress him by vaping in his face and he was just like... bitch Tf... ಠ_ಠ... pls step away

He’s ALWAYS late to class bc he’s polishing the handles of his motorcycle and somehow none of the teachers are bothered

He’ll just pop in like 30 minutes into class, in the middle of a class discussion about why technology is ruining the planet; the teacher will give one look, smile at him, and then it’s all chill & dandy

Which is fucking RUDE bc one time u were late to class bc u got the RUNS at the end of P.E.,,,, and she was merciless!! She hit u with the “30,000 word essay due tonight” bitch!!!

Injustice™

So he’s late for the 3904390th time one day, and you’re super mad!! The second he walks in you feel urself fuming, and u turn to ur friend Junkyu who’s already giving u the 👀

Ur SO MAD u start going off,,, and ur like “that fucking jerk he’s always late and ms. johnson doesn’t give a single fuck... in FACT ! she loves his ass. This isn’t fair, honestly im gonna bring this to the principal”

And junkyu’s just cackling away bc ur doing The Most right now, and honestly ur kinda loud, so ppl just are looking @ u like “ .....? ...? are u ok ?? ?”

The answer is no

So ur talking ur shit storm all the way thru your teacher’s instructions, and she introduces a partner project (#cliche am i right)

Junkyu’s already grasping ur hands bc ur his ride or die

But before y’all can start giggling in harmony bc best friends forever, Ms. johnson gives u this rlly fat smirk, and she’s like “hehe... im making partners”

Thats when ur soul dies bc u happen to have the Worst Luck when it comes to partner assignments

Ur always partnered with that one dude that excuses himself to go to the bathroom, but then just vapes outside for 46 minutes,,, and u have to do the WHOLE thing urself,,, and ms johnson just bats her eyelashes and gives u one of these :-) “is there an issue?” and ur just like “:/// no im ok”

(ur not ok)

THIS TIME she’s looking around the classroom, and she starts pairing ppl up

When she pairs junkyu up with this other girl u feel like ur about to have a stroke,,, he gives u a sad lil frown and now ur in ur #feels

Suddenly ms Johnson points right @ you and she’s like “YOU!”

And right at that moment, mr byounggon gets up so he can go polish his bike handles for the 89th time this morning

And she’s like “(y/n) and byounggon, u guys are partners”

Ur like :o

He’s like :o

Ms. johnson’s like XD lolz :P!!!

Junkyu squeezes ur hand one last time, and he’s like “pls dont kick his ass plz, u don’t have the arm strength”

And ur like “PLS~~~~he might LOOK tough but he’s probably a rlly lame loser....” and then junkyu scurries away to another table group

Byounggon walks toward u

And as he’s walking ur crossing ur arms, and mumbling under ur breath, ‘god why ME, WHY’

Ur interrupted from ur sad hour bc byounggon yanks the chair across from u and finally sits his ass down,,,,

He’s looking outside the window,, probably @ his bike, honestly they’re a ship, #byounggbike

U kinda just look at him, absorb everything,, ur like “o dam... he DOES look tough”

His hair is jet black and messy but somehow perfect? He’s got this silver cross earring that dangles down from one ear, and when he lifts his hand to scratch his face, u notice the silver rings on his hands... and ur like... hmm kinda sexy...

Ur in ur own world, just staring at his VRY plump lips that are literally the perfect colour... no lip products needed damn

And the longer u stare, u realize his eyes are kinda sparkly? And his teeth are perfect? And he as a rlly cute long neck

In the middle of ur trance, byounggon’s so confused, honestly a little bit offended, bc ur just staring at him with ur eyebrows knitted, rlly intently, like ur analyzing him

He narrows his eyes and he’s like “what!”

U kinda jump in ur seat and ur like shit fUCK, he must be so weirded out by me rn (he is)

Ur mouth is agape, and u dont rlly know what to say, so u DONT SAY ANYTHING

And that makes him MORE frustrated

He’s like “WHAT are u looking at!”

And ur like

“SFOSJDFIOS... ur eyes are rlly pretty!”

For a second he thinks ur joking

But u look at him so expectantly, and ur cheeks are FLUSHED, so he thinks u might be serious; ur heart is beating 3430430 miles per hour, and u gulp,

But listen -- u HAD to say it-- bc ur mama taught u to give compliments when u think them! She’s a nice lady

Anyways back to the story

Ur definitely about to go into cardiac arrest

And ms johnson’s just sitting behind her desk like 👀🍵

Byounggon’s quiet for a moment

And for a Hot Second™ u think ur about to get ur ass BEAT (not physically, but verbally ;))

But then u notice the tops of his ears are turning a rlly deep red, and he averts his eyes downward

He mumbles a rlly rlly rlly quiet “ .. thanks”; and he says it so fast u almost miss it, but he sAID IT!

Then it’s quiet again and the level of awkward is so intense u want 2 die

Junkyu looks over to you from his table and he’s thinking ‘shit some real shady business must have gone down bc they wont even LOOK @ each other”

Little does he know.....

So u clear ur throat suddenly like “AHEM ok,,, we should probably work on this”

And he’s like “aight”

he seems so tough when he says things like that, but he was such a shy boy two seconds ago

So you guys get started

And it’s basically a project where you introduce the other person to the class with a video... so u rlly gotta get to know each other, and bond and all that cute stuff

And u already KNOOOOO if u dont do well, ur gonna face ms. johnson’s wrath, so ur really invested in doing a good job

And as an added BONUS!!! Ms. johnson says the group that does the best job on the project doesn’t need to take part in the final exam

And ur like BOOOOOYAHH!!! Bc final exams always fuck u over, and u go down like 5% just bc u momentarily lose ur mind and suffer

So ur #dedicated

In this beginning, byounggon rlly doesn’t open up that much, and ur genuinely concerned because it seems like ur going to be making a five minute video about how much he loves his bike (hint: A LOT)

But then u make a rule!! Ur like “hehe... no more bike talk.. Okay?”

And that’s when the Good Stuff comes out

You learn all this wild shit about byounggon

U go down the list of questions miss johnson gave ya’ll and you’re learning all about how  how he likes writing songs, and composing music, and for some weird reason, he rlly likes bowling

Then ur like “whats ur fav body part”

He looks @ u rlly funny, and he’s kinda chuckling, giving u the “uhh are u sure that’s a question, or are u just curious?”

Ur FLABBERGASTED

You shove the paper in his face and you point at the question like a crazy person and he puts his hands up and he’s like “DAMN ok i get it”

Ur not rlly mad tho... homeboy’s got #jokes

He forces a smile, and then he juts out his finger at his cheek

And he’s like

“I like my Dimple.. It’s pretty impressive tbh”

U kinda just wanna bug him so ur like “mmm nah i dont think it’s all that impressive... not that cute” (ITS RLLY THAT CUTE THO)

He pretends to be rlly offended, and he sticks his tongue out and kinda bites it

Like tHIS:

Mr byounggon is NOT having ur sass today !

Ur trying to keep a straight face but FUCK he looks rlly hot in this moment, and suddenly, ur thinking... “fav body part.... Every part!”

He laughs it off, and he’s like, “nah dude, u have to see it in The Moment! That’s when you’ll respect The Dimple”

U deadpan at him bc.... LMFAO did he rlly just say “respect The Dimple”

Yes queen he did

U guys continue like this for a while, until the bell rings, and after, he scratches the back of his neck, and he’s struggling to make eye contact

When he looks like this, u rlly start to wonder how ppl could think he ever looked intimidating,,, bc GOD when his cheeks are a light shade of pink, and his eyes are wandering, and his hands are shaky, he looks so frickin CUTE

He’s like... “so u want start filming @ ....atmyhouselater...?”

Ur like w o t did u just say sir

And he’s like: “do u want to start filmingatmyhouselater!!!”

The classroom is loud bc ppl are shuffling outside, and he’s talking so fast, and honestly, ur just distracted by the hair that’s shifting in and out of his eyes... sparkly eyes... ANYWAYS

Ur like... “byounggon... pls enunciate” !!!

FINALLY,,, smoothly and clearly,,, he says “wanna start filming at my place later?”

And ur shook

But SO EXCITED

Bc u’ll see the Home of Byounggon

Ur like “hehe... yeES”

And then he’s like “ok cool” and fucking BLASTS OUT THAT CLASSROOM LIKE NO TOMORROW

For a second ur kinda shook bc damn.... Does he not have whiplash???

U turn around and u have this fucking goofy smile on ur face

Junkyu slowly walks up to and he’s like “... is it just me, or do you look happy after talking to... byounggon?”

U look @ him in distaste

“It’s just u bitch!”

He can’t know... . ... . . YET.

***TIME SKIP BBY*****

During lunch, u spilled to Junkyu about all the shit that went down with byounggon, and how u were feeling kinda gushy

When u told him u were gonna go to byounggon’s after school, he lost his damn mind

He was like: “take pictures and send them to me PLZ”

U were like: “TF NO!.... hehe ok maybe”

After school, u give junkyu a fat hug bc he’s a cuddly koala bear, and he wishes you good luck!! Then u run to ur locker and try and act cool

Byounggon pops into the hallway a few seconds later, and he raises his eyebrows @ u, and gestures toward the door

U try not to RUN over to him, and restrict urself to a respectable speed walk

He kinda chuckles bc ur .... cute.

U guys both walk outside and ur anticipating his mom to kinda just appear and drive u both to his place,,

No bitch

That’s not happening

U guys walk out to the side of the school, and u see the world famous #byounggbike

He shoots you a thumbs up and he’s like “mm ok so just hop on!”

Ur like

“Ha a ha .. wh at?”

He smirks all cocky, and he’s like “what? You’ve never rode a motorcycle before or something?”

Ur like. “HA! Whaaaaaaat? Of COURSE i ride motorcycles... in fact, i ride them... . . allllways...”

And he’ s like .......... ok shutup and get on

So u pop ur cute butt onto the seat, and he gets on, and he’s like: “okay, make sure u hold on rlly tight, ok? It can be dangerous”

U kinda scoff bc damn... he’s doing The Most rn isn’t he? So ur all like “PSSHHHTT... i dont even need to im a natural--”

And suddently u dont even have time to let out a breath bc homebody just GOES

IMMEDIATELY u latch ur arms around his waist and ur shutting ur eyes rlly tightly and screaming like “WTF HOW COULD U DO THAT WITHOUT A WARNING”

When he slows down @ the red light, u can FEEL his smirk from the backseat, and he’s like “o well u said ur a pro so i just... went?”

U want to smack his stupid mouth,,, but also,,,, k*ss his stupid mouth

Honestly byounggon was right

When u see The Dimple in the moment,,,, u really fall for it

The ride from then on is mostly smooth, and now ur kinda relaxed, so u just feel the breeze flying threw ur hair

U lose ur hair tie but its ok

Bc u do that everywhere

Ur sort of just enjoying the moment, and honestly it’s kinda peaceful??? U kinda like #byounggbike... now u guys are a ship... #(y/n)bike

Byounggon notices ur vibing with his bike, and it makes him smile rlly wide

At one of the stop lights, he looks at you in his peripheral vision and ur laughing and in ur own lil world

Ur so cute

He likes it so much

He starts riding again, and then just to keep u on ur toes, the boy SWERVES on the road a little bit and ur like “FUCKING STOP DOING THAT ILL KILL U”

And he’s LAUHGIGN so hard, and the laugh is deep, and it vibrates through his whole body

U feel it when ur arms are wrapped around him

and there’s this devilish look in his eyes

It’s really fucking cute

But u wont tell him that.

U guys finally arrive at The House of Byounggon, and you rush into his place bc damn... it’s cold outside! And he’s wearing a sleeveless black top AHHHHHHHHHHHH bicep palooza

U guys get warm inside!!!! And u meet his mom!!! The cutest woman in the entire world!!! And she brings you guys carrots and celery as u work

You ask more questions, and you learn about byounggon’s friends: seunghun, yedam, mashiho, hyunsuk

He shows u pics!!! Damn they’re literally all cute

Hot Squad

U tell byounggon u like to bake, so he comes up with a brilliant idea

He’s like “oh!!!! My mom’s about to make some cherry pie, make i can film u helping her out or smthh for the video”

U guys pile into the kitchen to help his mom, but she’s got the TEA!!!!! She’s like “hehe kids, i’ll be right back i need to do... something.....(y/n) knead this dough while im gone”

She YEETS tf outta there!!! And she’s nowhere to be found for a suspiciously long amount of time... hmmmm

Byounggon films u kneading the dough, but honestly, u dont know what tf ur doing

When u said u liked baking,,, u meant like...box cake

Ur playing with the dough like it’s a slime video, and byounggon is laughing his fucking head off while u just suffer

“Ur doing a rlly good job” he says with his mouth full of cherries

Ur about to tell him tf off for eating ur ingredients when ur hair falls out ur hair tie and it’s all over ur damn face

Byounggon’s like.... O shit

And ur like..... He LP

He comes to ur rescue

“What..... do i do”

U tell him to take the hair tie off the ground, and grab ur hair into a ponytail

His hands are so tentative, honestly a lil shaky, and for a brief second, he skims the skin of ur neck with his fingers

Ur body: shook

U have shivers all over and he bounces AWAY FROM U and he’s like “i- im sorry it was an accident”

Ur like... chill tf out brother... it’s cool

He comes back, ties ur hair into the ugliest side ponytail u ever saw, and u guys continue filming

“U made me look so ugly byounggon ur shady af” ur whining to him as u guys watch the clips back

Byounggon gasps!!! He’s like !!! “u did that urself!”

Then u wanted to kill him bc... did this bitch just call u ugly

U laugh and hit his shoulder!! And he’s like “nah im playing u always look cute”

IT COULD’VE BEEN AWKWARD

But u play it cool!!! And u smile at him, and he smiles at u

Then ur like

“Hey can i tell u a secret?”

“... what?”

“Honestly, ur not as bad as ppl make u seem”

He looks @ u with the stupidest smile but he knits his brows and he’s like GEE thank u (y/n), that is so kind of u!!! Ur so kind!!!

And ur like “NOOO hear me out, okay? You’re really nice, and smart, and sweet, and cute.. Ur rlly not as tough as u look....”

He’s kinda hurt, and he puffs his chest out, and kinda pouts

“Im tough.....”

U guys both just laugh

Moments like this continue for the next two weeks as you guys work on ur projects

Somehow byounggon convinces you to go bowling???

You finally go!!! and surprisingly, you beAT HIS ASS SO GOOD???~~~~ for someone that talked such mad shit about his skills,,,, ur rlly thought he’d do well

He got like.... 64 points

U got 107

He BEGGED u not to put that in the video!!!!!!!! Like so so so so badly!!! He offered to give you a ride home on #byounggbike everyday

U told him u wouldn’t put in it

And then the day of, when it popped up in front of the whole class, u were like SIKE BITCH I PUT THAT SHIT IN ANYWAYS!

He was choked up ! but dw he was ok

The whole time the video is playing, u guys are smiling at each other

Junkyu’s looking at u both with the most incredulous look on his face and he’s like... “am i interrupting something, here?”

“Shhhhhh.... Im looking at The Dimple”

“W h  a  t”

When ms johnson announces that u and byounggon had the best project, u just about pop out of ur seat, and u run ALL the way to byounggon, and u wrap ur arms around his neck, and u swing a lil bit off ur feet

He’s smiling so hard, The Dimple is #out, and the rumbling of his chest makes ur heart flutter

In that moment of excitement, u feel really bold, and u lurch forward and just plant the sweetest little kiss on byounggon’s cheek

He kinda does the :o

For a second, ur like... fuck SHIT,, i just fucked all the shit up

But then byounggon looks down at u

And he’s 4290290% heart eyes

He crouches into your ear, and he’s like, “hey can i tell u a secret?”

Ur nodding ur head like ur in a fucking trance

“I like you, (y/n)”

“I like u too, byounggon”

You guys are both smiling, junkyu’s gagging in the corner, ms johnson is loving every minute of this

U force urself on ur tippy toes, look into this sparkly eyes, and u crash ur lips onto his

His lips are soft and sweet, like strawberries

And when u pull away, he’s just as red as one too

While everyone else spends the next couple days studying for the final exam, you and byounggon are straight chillin

U guys spend ur time at the House of Byounggon, kissing the days away, and eating the carrots his mom provides for u both<333333333333

No bowling tho yikes :/// he’s scarred for life

thank u for reading and i LOVE U pls follow me im new

thank u guys for reading if u did!!!!! im a new ygtb blog <33 i plan on writing here and there, but im super dedicated rn bc there’s such little content. also, pls reach out to me, i want some friends <3 ok bye

[tayegi]

Hey Lu! I'm sorry you have to deal with such bullshit, like you are an amazing writer and hearing that your work is being stolen really breaks my heart. Props to you for being nice the first time around, because as someone that's dabbling in writing myself, i might've lost my shit the first time around if i saw my work being stolen

Anonymous said:Honestly I admire you so much for not deleting everything you have ever written because of people like the wattpad author.... that’s fucking crazy.

Anonymous said:Hey Lu, I've never sent you a message because you're already inundated with so many. But I wanted to send some support after what happened with that anencephalic rat who blatantly plagiarized your work. I'm a TA in my uni's computer science department and I posted some of my code online as a reference for my students in lab, until one student pulled all my code from github and submitted it as their own. Safe to say I don't provide code samples anymore. (1)

Anonymous said:Whatever you decide to do with your writing from now on, I just want to say I really enjoy all your work and I'm so sorry that you had your work stolen like this. Looooove you (hehe love LU) (2)

Anonymous said:Hey Lu, I’ve always been a quiet follower of yours, but after this plagiarism incident, I had to send something. I’m sorry you have to deal with ignorant and immature people like her. I legit understand why you would want to stop writing after something like this. You gave her a warning and she’s just not understanding how polite you’ve been about it (imagine once she gets to college, yikes). Anyways, we’re always here to love and support you. We can get through this!!! ❤️❤️❤️

peachyguki said:This is so bs. People dont understand that THIS IS ILLEGAL. SUCH DUMBASSES. I feel so fucking bad for you Lu...jfc she better comprehend what she did was wrong.

taebunsuga said:Fuuccckkk I knew it abt the plagiarizing thing but I wasn’t sure,, I was reading Pour Up and thought it seemed awfully familiar and was like is this new rules, but then thought maybe I was just reading a fic, but then she mentioned the office hoes theme part and I’m like shit omi this is new rules and then next thing I asked her abt it and so she posts this whole ass chapter abt how her plagiarism wasn’t intentional 🤧🤧💀💀

Anonymous said:This! Entire! Situation! Is! Whack! Srsly she's so dumb thinking she wouldn't face repercussions at some point. If it means anything tho her writing isn't great and I think it's safe to say we all know you're superior here. I really hope this gets sorted out and she faces some type of consequences

Anonymous said:There's nothing I hate more than a theif and I'm so sorry you have to experience this.

lucielux said:I wasn't on tumblr much today so I just saw this whole plagiarism thing and I'm soooo sorry this is happening to you :( idgaf if I can't report her for ripping off your fic, I'm reporting her for hate or something else then but Wattpad won't stop me from reporting her this is just not okay fam. Anyway hope you're okay girl ❤️

lucielux said:Lu I know you're off the internet for today, but just in case this is still an issue when you come back, when you report for hate Wattpad will send you an email asking you to complete a form. In the form you should include what point of the "Code of Conduct" was violated, and one of them is "Don't share stories that aren't yours". SO what I'm getting at is y'all can't repot plagiarism but you can repot for hate and then add that plagiarism happened. In any case, hope you're feeling better 💖

Anonymous said:I'm so sorry Lu. You definitely don't deserve this shit. She's being two faced and doesn't understand consequences. Honestly, I don't think she will understand unless you file a formal complaint. Her behaviour is shameful to say it lightly.... All my love you Lu!! I hope this bullshit ends soon.

Anonymous said:I don't get why people want her to send them the pdf files of her rip off??? why don't thy just like, read the original one here??? Instead of supporting plagiarism??? like what

Anonymous said:how is she so dedicated to plagiarizing, willing to send pdfs'? rather than spending time just trying to write herself.. 🤷‍♀️

Anonymous said:why don't you do the same? send us all pdf files of your writing and let's see if she'll continue to write "her original story" HA! her fans will realize that she's not so innocent and original when in a few weeks she still doesn't have any more additions to "her story"

Anonymous said:It looks like people don't like going back on their opinions, like: I like this author and I'll keep liking it no matter what, oh look she was accused of of plagiarism, but i said I like her I can't go back, I won't even see the original story, I'm just gonna say I don't believe in it" IT'S OK, to like an author and then if this author do shit you can and SHOULD be disappointed and stop supporting this bad thing they done, this actually apply to any artist,actor,musician+

latebloomer19

submitted:

I’m so sad and angry at the same time that the plot was originally yours and it was plagiarized by this author on wattpad. Honestly that became my fave fic tho because of the girl mc’s attitude and character. Now that I have found the real author I’m going to support the story so much💕💕💕 I downloaded the tumblr app just because I want to read your other fics hahaha 💕💕💕

littlekookieboy said:Omg I’m so outraged and the fact she’s trying to play victim with everything is even worse! I really hope she gets reported and she learns not to do plagiarism anymore. Seriously ur one the first writers I’ve ever read from here and seeing as how she has the audacity to do something like this is disgusting. Anyways I hope all goes well!!!!

canadiankae said:smh kids these days. I am actually astounded at her stupidity for announcing that she straight up stole your work and then tried to play victim. She'll get what's coming to her when she forgets to source for her assignments in school... then try to say she came up with it lol. If she keeps it up we'll help you take care of it. No way i'm letting my favorite writer go through this again

Anonymous said:im rly sorry all of this is happening to you. i wish i could do something to make u feel better and reassure you that we all care about you and hate seeing people do this shit to you. big hugs

Anonymous said:Lu, have you ever tried any online plagiarism check? I think it would be fun if you showed her the 99% similarity with New Rules. But I don't get it. Doesn't she feel embarrassed? I think its so sad.

Anonymous said:hoenstly the whole 'i spent hours on it tho' bs shes trying to pull is so annoying cause like if you were really willing to spend that much time plagiarizing someone elses work, why couldn't you have just written your own stuff during that time??? i just ugh im like mad for you if that makes any sense just urgghh

Anonymous said:I'm sorry you're having to deal with this shit. You are much more talented and well thought out than someone who cant think of their own ideas. and I've genuinely loved a lot of your fics. New rules is an amazing story that I always check for updates on and I love what you try to convey through your stories. It's disgusting that someone would do that to your work but I just want to remind you how appreciated your work is by actual fans. Love you!!!! I hope you feel better!

Anonymous said:Tbh i am so sorry that you have to deal with this situation now... you deserve so much better. I hope this thing ends quickly before upsetting you any further..

Anonymous said:Do it, file the report. If you don't you're letting her win. She has to learn her lesson and realize that she's in the wrong

Anonymous said:Ah! I sent the whole pour up ordeal and i’m so sorry i mistyped and put Tumblr instead of Wattpad because I was rushing to let you know! I’m glad it’s sorted because I became so angry that she plagiarised your work so blatantly! 💜

tywriteskpop said:I hope this thievery issue is resolved soon! I know I’d be devastated if my hard work was taken like that. Hopefully all of the support from your readers and many others will help convince her she is in the wrong. Please don’t stress too much about it. 🙏🏻 You have many people backing you up on this, and the option to report her for plagiarism is there when you’re ready, should she not cooperate. I wish many blessings to you, friend.

Anonymous said:Ok but like plagiarism on Wattpad is such a problem??? I’m sorry that you’re dealing with this rn 💕💕💕

sheridandwyer said:I am so sorry to hear that you're going through this! As a fellow writer, it breaks my heart to see a story that you've worked your ass off to craft and make original just stolen like this! I will DEFINITELY be leaving a comment venting my frustrations)in a respectful way, of course.) We've got your back and your followers will fight for you. Please know you're not in this fight alone!

Anonymous said:Lu! I'm so sorry about this whole problem! I went on wattpad to see the story and your comment is there. I cannot even fathom how much you work for your fics, but I do know how much it means to you. We will help you out any way we can and take that story down. It's not acceptable this person continues to get credit fot it. We love you, Lu!

Anonymous said:hey hon!!! i read her story before reading yours (after finding out her irresponsible actions) & i really want to say, yours is wayyyyyy better

acucarebiscoito said:Omg Lu this wattpad plagiarism thing is really annoying, what can we do to help? I love your work and I'm so angry and sad that they are disrespecting you this way ):

awkward-kooks said:Oh babe :( people are awful, stealing works is exactly why I'm scared to write on sns :/ hope they come to the realization that what they're doing is wrong and remove the story.

thank you guys so much for all of your love and support. Seriously, without you guys, I wouldve been so upset and frustrated right now. But it’s only because of this incredible outpouring of love and all of your support in talking to her, reporting her, etc. that we’ve gotten through this. And all of your suggestions are so hilarious and creative! I cracked up reading this alsjdfklsdfj i love you guys so much

[teachers-are-nerds]

why does my brain keep saying very loudly and rapidly “i want to die i want to die i want to die i want to fucking die” even though i absolutely do not want to die right now i dont even have the motivation to scream but i wonder if a solid scream would be cathartic

theres just so many things i need to complain about my heart is pounding so hard im in pain and im shaking and everything feels bad and i cant change my meds bc i cant contact my psychiatrist from france or like... more importantly figure out the logistics

i dont wanna go back to the states though bc gburg is probably gonna be hella toxic for me again even though my schedule for next year is super good and im super looking forward to it

why did i send home all of my sheet music and why didnt i send home my jackets holy wow that’s gonna be a lot of weight i cant pay for with the luggage on my way home

what if im not mentally ill enough for meds i know i have to change them bc at this moment i am NOT feeling helped by them but what if another med will make me even worse and what if i am actually just shitty at managing symptoms and how come everyone else seems to be able to manage or hide or work through their shit and i have to go and make a big fucking deal out of it all and i literally even wrote my prof like “hi btw ive been suicidal thats why i havent been in class” and that’s just using mental health as a fucking excuse it’s not like an hour and a half of sitting through a class from which i glean approximately nothing would actually kill me, as it were lol

i have to get the key to christine but that means 20 min walk home and 20 min walk back and maybe the sunlight will be good for me but i also need to write the other two pages of my paper that im obviously not doing now since im complaining and making a bajillion zillion posts all over social media lol it is a cry for help how come i cant make myself do the things i need to do im literally in physical pain because i cant make myself do the paper that was due an entire week ago !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! how the actual fuck did i even graduate high school how did i fucking survive

well i mean i didnt drink in high school but i also got apx 3h of sleep a night so idk

im not drinking today though like i refuse to do that today bc money and also i need to just uhh not drink for a while because that’s what healthy people do. not day drink on weekdays.

i thought i was better abt that this year than last year but i guess not as much as i thought but at least im not sleeping in my friend’s bed every other night?? which is an improvement

god i fucking hate that i cut myself out of the queermmunity like that even though it’s better for me i just wish i did it in a more mature way im so fucking angry at myself im not even homesick at all i miss like 4 or 5 people from the states in total and i feel fucking awful that theres a bunch of people who will message me like “omg miss u” and i know i miss them too but like i feel like im lying when i respond “miss u 2″ and that isnt fair at all and i hate it i hate feeling like im lying to my friends i hate that i dont miss them i hate that this semester is supposedly the best semester of my life and i still have to convince myself not to step in front of a bus sometimes and i hate that The Brain Demons are clawing my stomach out from the inside but at least i havent purged in a while so there’s that and usually i can talk myself out of other self harm shit

and putting the content of my complaining post in the tags is to warn people if they read it but also it’s gonna make some people like OH NO UR IN DANGER LET ME READ THIS and i dont ?? i dont want that???????? but i also do???? good fucking lord i hate being such an attention whore

i hate that im a whore in general

like i dont regret any sexploits ive had whatever but i hate that i feel jealous of some people because i dont want to monopolize their lives and i dont want to prevent them from sharing love w other people i jsut want people to cuddle and kiss and be romantic with and it hurts but i also cant ocmplain abt it with my friends bc they also are like dammit i want a partner and me i have a few consistent sex partners but i want romantic partners but i need to change the people with whom i spend my time because they are not great for my mental health and i hate that bc i love them dearly but im destroying myself just in a different way from last year

the people i loved last year are driving me up a goddamn wall and i hate that i hate that i hate that so much bc i still care about them but im such an idiot i cant stand up for what feels right or against what feels wrong to me bc ill jsut get yelled at and i know that means i shouldnt be close to them im so hurting today

everything feels like too much and im shaking and still avoiding responsibilities and idk if writing this post is gonna get it out of my head enough bc on one hand i might tire myself out and not feel the need to write about it more to people and not have to bother them or like idk continue distracting conversations or maybe having people worry and try to talk to me will give me something to ignore so i can make myself write my paper idfk!!!!!!!!! but on the other hand uhh what if this is just going to make me fixate even more on my problems im screaming in sid e

oh ps im realizing that my family dynamic, while much much miuchn much much better than so fuckin many other people (feels conceited to say but im grateful for it and feel i cant or shouldnt talk abt it in case it triggers something in those with shitty home situations!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!) im recognizing that smth about the dynamic feels unstable as well!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i want to cry!!!!!!!!!!!!!! what if i finish my paper, turn it in, sit for 20 minutes of class, go breathe, come back for the end

idfk othe rstudents need to talk to the prof too i cant monopolize him with the same content from my email to him and the same “i need help but idk what help i need” statement from last week or whatever

idk

idk idk idk will summer help me at all? will i live at home? will that be better or worse for me? can i remove all the materialism from my life? obv no but i feel i need to get rid of everything i own to cleanse myself of whatever and also i feel like cutting my own stomach and other organs out of myself but i obv cant and promise i wont try that lol

what work will i have or internships i dont have money i feel trapped will i hate myself forever will i be stuck in loops forever i will absolutely live long enough to find out and i will overcome things but like jesus chriiiiiiiiiiiiist im Not Good rn im sorry

yells

[embersiisms-aa]

"Send me a number from 1-500 and I’ll tell you how I feel about you in a post without anyone knowing your identity."

88

honestly you are one of my closest friends on here and idk why i’m too scared to talk to you but i love?? you so much?? i love our muses more than i think i could ever love anything and i dont?? kNOW HOW TO DEAL?? but really,, you are such a sweet bean and i love talking to you ooc, we have like 2 threads actually but like 450 thread ideas that we just casually roleplay out on chat ,, i looooov talking to you about anything and everything and i hope we can always be friends <333 smooch,,  

98

we recetnly started following each other but woW!! ur characters are honestly so cool and so neat, we have one thread currently and i cannot tell you HOW LONG i tried to think of something to write for that one-liner, i just... I DIDNT KNOW HOW TO MAKE OUR CHARACTERS  INTERACT,, but i would looove to talk to you about plots or whatever you’re up for !!!! i find ur characters to be vv intriguing! they’re so well thought out :0c 

 17 - url begins with a  D

aaaa you have been with me for like. EVER!!! i really appreciate your continued lov for jack and me <333 you are such a lovely person who always interacts with me no matter what it is!!! we have a lot of threads scattered around lolol,, but i really do love our character’s interactions and i love how different and unique your character is <333

17 - url begins with an A 

honestly ur so great and im like 2000% afraid of you but i definitely adore all your characters and the hard work you put into ur art & ur muses! We have a few threads currently floating around and so far i really love interacting with all of ur muses! i know we chatted about a possible ship between one of them & jack and im totally down for it if you still are! i also cant wait to see where they go even if they are just friends :0c! 

400

ur a BUTT....... but i lov u !!!! i cant believe the way our friendships’s grown from the first time we met at Otakon to now!! i never imagined we’d get so close and that we’d be the way we are now <33 but anywya. i loooove your muse, they’re so great and so soft,,, i love the au we have together with our other two pals <333 i cherish every moment we interact and talk and i am so so so glad we became friends!!!! we for real need to hang out soon <3

367

aaAAA!!! we have spoken scarcely buuUUT i love chatting with you!!! we should talk more!! ur characters are all so fuckin neat and they’re all so different!!!!! not to mention the ship we have going on rn is GOLD and i soooo cannot wait to see what happens with them !!!! they seem like such a fun ship to have and like,,,, the interactions they can have,,,, are so tempting and fun ;3c 

[survivor-themyscira-blog]

TRIBES SWAPPED AT THIS POINT. 

charlotte make this fucking post already before i combust

YES THIS IS SO PERFECT!!! I WAS SO FUCKED ON THIS TRIBE! NOW I GET A SECOND CHANCE TO NOT BE A FLOP LETS GO LADIES! GOD BLESS

LMFAO LMFAO ME JORDAN AND LILY ARE SAME TRIBE ITS OVER ALREADY WE GOT THIS

I AM WITH LOGAN NUT NUT NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! But I'm away from Madeline and Joradn and Toph and :( I'm worried! But I chose Kai so that's fun hopefully he'll stick with me fjndsfjsdak I'm gonna try to bond with Madison oh my this is a mess

A 3-3 split on this tribe, I need to find an idol just in case, I'm not willing to go to rocks for Toph and I'm sure he is not for me. Lets see how this goes, Madeline exposing me as her friend already. Lets just win my Hippos, I don't want to go to tribal.

Jaiden.... on my tribe again.... I like him but.... BUT... BUT he talks too much he's going to ruin my game GRRR. Hi Jaiden I love you but you WORRY ME

Ugh I'm like REALLY emo I was separated from Jordan and Madeline what the FUCK we got the best scores WE DIDN'T EARN THISjdjasfklas i miss them rip. and now like everyone on my tribe is.... asleep. They're like ALL europeans. GET UP U FUCKS I NEED TO TALK TO U Also I'm going to make an alliance with one representative from each country and call it the United Nations... I'm just working on it okay it's going to happen

WAIT FUCK IM AWAY FROM RHONE TOO WTF... I didn't think this through last night but honestly my second choice was Logan for the thing (first choice because I wanted him over Kai but I was scared of Madeline and Jordan) so like this wouldn't be very different but ugh. Toph, Rhone, Jordan, Madeline, and Ruthie (I forgot to talk about Ruthie I love her) are gone and I'm EMO AS HECK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

NICHOLAS IS PLAYING THIS GAME? I knew this but forgot, I remember he as INACTIVE and got a strike during the selfie round, eventually I hope I can get on his tribe I know he would tell me if he heard my name.

Um another thing. I'm so happy to be on a yellow tribe. I love yellow it's the color of positivity and sunshine and that's me

WOW THIS FUCKING TRIBE SWAP! WHAT THE HELLFUCK! THIS IS SO GOOD! Okay, so. Accordan to Jordan, Rhone wants to work alongside me JP and Nicholas, which I would be fine with. We're also excited for/planning to work with Jack as the trio of Jordan and his students, so... This is probably the most secure I've been all game. I was good on the Hippo tribe, but now I know for sure that I'm alright. But there's one other thing that excites me here, and that's our challenge potential. Sure, that's a general good thing, but it's super cool in my case for one specific reason. I've never been to a premerge Athena tribal. Watch my streak continue.

Time to work my charm on this tribe HOPEFULLY I can find someone trustworthy to work closely with! I've played a game with Ian before and I mean, I thought he didn't like me after but we've talked since then a little and I'm excited that we have another chance to play and maybe start over, he may be the number one to tell all my tea to that I'm looking for!

On 10/16/17, at 10:46 PM, Emily wrote: > hi!! On 10/16/17, at 10:48 PM, Madison 🐷🐷🐷 wrote: > hi! On 10/16/17, at 10:48 PM, Emily wrote: > how are u!! It's currently 11:38pm. Good talk, Madison ;)

Hello my mates! 18 Castaways are left. So, the Swap happened and I am okay with my tribe so far. I get along well with Emily, but I'm a bit concerned that she picked Kai to stay on her team. I'm cautious around him. I'm back with Amanda and I don't really trust her anymore lol, but for now it's best to stick together, especially after what she's been through in the vote. But for now, I still want to talk a bit with Madison and Logan. I feel like I'm not the first target at the moment with a clear group of 2 in play and the old target on Amanda's back. I don't have that much to talk about yet, but I'm keen to get a bit more social now - last week was very heavy on the irl side. But I'm happy to be on a tribe that's so european. :D Cya soon~

Ahh this tribe is pretty lit. I feel really safe within it. I have logan, Emily, Andreas and Amanda ahh this amazing Time to win a game

https://youtu.be/TKydLkGHuNc

I miss having people be awake and I’m awake and having an active tribe wtf happened I hate

I really need these Europeans to wake the fuck up why was I put on a tribe with ALL OF THE EUROPEANS WHAT IS THIS FDMJKLSAJLK I just want their input on the song ideas and they're absent because they're sleeping and I get that but also FUCK THAT WTF I just want to get started with this challenge I'm excited and energized and avoiding doing my homework

I just love Logan

So I'm definitely happy with this new tribe. Lily, Jordan and Nicholas are all people I wanted to work with on Hippolyta so for them to all be here means that we can lose a challenge and probably be okay! I'm completely indifferent towards Jack and Raymond honestly. I'm so bad at connecting w people sometimes especially men, idk why. I'm just slow to warm up to people I guess. I HATE music video challenges because I'm really busy IRL and don't have time for this shit quite frankly. Idek what I'm gonna contribute to this challenge yet so I guess I'll just have to see what I'm able to do tonight.

OKAY NEW TRIBE WOOOOO! Rankdown! Emily - THE SWEETEST SWEET BEAN. Obviously I want to work with her going forward. She'll be my new like f6. She'll beat me past that, comp queen. Kai - My literal son? I love him. He's a good one, and I wanna see if I can make this hoe my goat. I'm not going to be a goat this game, but I'll see if I can be a goat farmer :~) Madison - My inactive queen. I can EASILY make her my goat. I know she _can_ get far in games, and I'd like to take her there again. Hopefully I can make her loyal and keep her out of the crosshairs by feeding her limited information. If she thinks I'm gonna just tell her shit, I can hold onto that relationship for a long ass time. Andreas and Amanda - Both of them talk to me about the same, and these are my first targets to go. While they're both sweet, I don't think they'll end up being much help to the tribe, aside from Andreas winning reward for us. Amanda didn't even guess, not that I'm shocked. I told people this would happen. They didn't believe me. I'm never fucking wrong.

ok so im hella bored at school 1. i am super stoked about the new tribes still! this is GREAT! i have been put into that hippo alliance which makes me think that i am in a p good position bc they see me as a semi-inactive goat type but they also need my vote to keep majority for now so im gonna keep on doing me ~ 2. the reward disadvantage thingy is probably good. it lets us most likely go to tribal and vote someone out which usually isn't a good thing but now i can use my vote as currency to prove loyalty! 3. this challenge? is perfect for my game right now because it lets me participate for once and prove i am an asset to the tribe for now! people are usually reluctant to submit for lip syncs but idc what people think about me so u know my dramatic ass will submit! ok thats it for now yeehaw

I’m on mobile so I can’t quote rn but Logan: Can we just make a pact now Logan: we’re not letting Jordan pines get anywhere near the end of this fucking game Listen, I know he’s right, but... UGH I NEED TO LISTEN TO LOGAN WHO I KNOW WILL BE A BETTER ALLY TO ME jwnjwwnjwnwjwn maybe Jordan will go out pre merge so I don’t have to show anyone my cards regarding him lmao but who can never be sure????

Was awesome to not be given the disadvantage, I'm not sure what all went in their decision as to who to give it to but glad it wasn't us. This challenge is the most dreaded aspect of these games for me. I'd rather have winterbells two rounds in a row than a music video

I feel like this is a school group project that I do my portion for but then I don’t get the portions from any one else until an hour before class. I’m gonna cry tbh Europeans please it’s like 3-4 your time WHERE IS UR SHIT and like literally this song is only three minutes long the least you can do is record yourself lip syncing to the song and upload it to YouTube and send me the link I’m SCREAMING

Okay Amanda is at the emergency room that’s um a very valid excuse but WHERE THE FUCCCCC ARE KAI AND MADISON?? Andreas and Logan told me they were filming later today but @Madison @Kai HENLO U STINKY TRIBE MEMBERS WHERE R U

Omg SO I just got out of my American History class and we have been talking about WWII so my teacher is talking about double agents and this guy called Garbo and I’m literally sitting in class thinking ... this is a genius strategy to use in Survivor I’m crying!!! So like basically I’m going to be Garbo, posing as a German and feeding the Germans accurate information up until D-Day where I fuck everything up for the Germans and get right with the British. D-Day meaning ... the day we take out Germany's closest ally. Germany meaning literally any person I want to screw over and British being ... probably Logan and whomever Logan and I want to work with. See like this would work out better if things were actually happening in the game wkwjwjnsja ... I don’t think much is happening on my tribe (at least I hope not) like I haven’t been put into any alliances so that’s :-/ there’s probably an alliance I don’t know about and they’re plotting against me and I won’t even be able to use my cute Garbo strategy. Also like this is an old and flawed strategy I’m sure but IM JUST TRYING TO BE GARBO OKAY he’s an icon and tbh a very big reason why the Axis Powers lost WWII so we all need to appreciate Garbo. Also if this dude’s name isn’t Garbo then my history teacher told me wrong and I’m just looking really silly but my history teacher is a woke bitch so I trust him. Thank you Garbo for doing the good shit and also inspiring me for this game lol

Anyone want to learn more about Agent Garbo? Um here are articles: http://www.npr.org/2012/07/07/156189716/agent-garbo-the-spy-who-lied-about-d-day https://www.mi5.gov.uk/agent-garbo HISTORY IS IMPORTANT!!!

On 10/19/17, at 3:30 PM, Emily wrote: > hey!! are u able to record videos for the music video challenge? if u can’t it’s no big deal I was just wondering On 10/19/17, at 3:30 PM, Kai . wrote: > Unfortunately not... i did mention it in the tribe chat already xD > Sowwy hun On 10/19/17, at 3:31 PM, Emily wrote: > it’s all good!! OH BITCH I DID NOT NEED THAT FUCKIN ATTITUDE this is me hinting to Kai that he should ... send in a video lmao. I get that like he doesn't have much time but three minutes P L E A S E it's going to be so weird if our video has three people in it! I'm getting Madison to send in a lip sync too (possibly) so that makes me not frustrated with her but like ....... Kai with this attitude "I did mention it in the tribe chat already xD" SHUT THE FUCK UP use REAL FUCKING EMOJIS and then he calls me "HUN" BITCHD FJKDSJFKAS I love over reaction but anyways our video is going to be weird because like Logan, Andreas, and I are the only ones who have submitted stuff!!!!!! UGLY!!!!!

I actually had a lot of fun filming for the challenge! Wish I could've gotten that bass line down a little better...smh I'm really surprised about Jordan. He's like a Sour Patch Kid -- first they're sour, then they're sweet. I just hosted him in Island of Shade and it's funny how I went from literally having his bitch ass blocked after House of Shade 9 to now where we're allies and kind of...friends? He's really matured in the couple of years we've known each other and it's actually really sweet to see. I do feel like he's a great ally for me because he's stronger than me in competitions and I crush him in any endgame scenario presuming I don't totally bungle my social game at the merge (and there's a non-zero chance of that happening tbqh). He's a genuinely good person even if he is kind of irritating at times. I'm like six years older than him so of course I'm gonna find him irritating lmao. Can't really say much about anyone else on this new tribe. Just not getting a great vibe from Raymond, Jack hasn't really tried to talk to me, and I trust Lily and Nicholas but they're both pretty inactive. I feel like Jordan and I are kind of the heart of this tribe right now, which hopefully means if we do lose this challenge we'll be safe. I just really hope someone I wanted to work with in this game doesn't get swapfucked tomorrow! :(

Here is the first draft that I’m submitting a confession to prove that ... only half of our tribe has submitted and we have five hours unrbabsjwbwjwb https://youtu.be/idbuRp73rig I’m literally,,,, CRYING what the HECK where is EVERYONE PLEASE HELP ME why can’t kai submit like wtf. Logan also told me not to expect much out of Madison so WOOHOO!!! I LOVE LOSING IMMUNITY!!!!!!!!!!!!!

HONESTLY the main thing I've learned from all this is not to listen to what anyone has told me about other people.

Logan

YASSSS MY FIRST IMMUNITY WIN! I DON'T HAVE TO PLAN A TRIBAL COUNCIL! OR NOTHING! I'M SO HAPPY! Prayers for my boy Raymond but yAS!

This is amazing. I was worried that if we lost and i didnt actuallt participate thered be a higher chance of me being voted out but i still feel super safe and in a good position with everyone!

Yay I’m glad we won! I am excited to watch all these!

The Men Lips came out with that WIN HONEY! I’m so happy! How did we do that I’m really shook. I have such low confidence in myself I really did not expect out tribe to win wowie snabajbanan now I get a day off! How fun! I’m sick rn so like that’s good all I want to do is watch Buzzfeed Unsolved and wait for this announcement that Charlotte/LA/JD were talking about earlier.... hmm. If we’re tribe swapping AGAIN I’ll cry sksbsjsnsjs but honestly? Not so bad. I don’t really like my tribe too much but of course I love Logan lol. And Andreas is cool. Anyway YAY WE WON

“i liked the knives and the cat. i also liked the girl waving around the knives. that was the highlight for me.” I WAS THE HIGHLIGHT FOR HER SJJSNSNSNS IM HONORED

Also fun fact: my dad yelled at me for using his expensive professional binoculars because I didn’t put them in their case correctly when I like put them up lol. But it was worth it honey we won-y

Hello again! There's a rainbow outside my window right now. https://i.imgur.com/1KZpEFA.jpg BECAUSE WE JUST WON IMMUNITY! I really didn't expect that since I didn't give it my best, but oh well... I am not complaining. :) Emily did most of the work, props to her. Logan contributed as much as I did. Amanda, Kai and Madison are MIA - even in chat for the most part. But that won't matter too much right now. Also yay, it was fun winning the Reward Challenge by punishing that cheeky A1 placement. CHECKMATE ANTELOPES! There were no Antelopes in Ancient Greece. And soon there won't be any in Themyscira. I am already a bit scared about the next Challenge, but for now, I'll have a relaxed evening. Also, if Madison doesn't start doing much soon, we'll have an easy target SHOULD we go to Tribal Council in the near future. See ya again in Round 4 :)

okay so going into tribal tonight i feel good! i have my og hippo alliance of 4 and then i have good enough bonds with raymond and jack to where i dont think that they would come for me if given the chance. the logical thing to do is to vote out someone who didn't contribute on the challenge, but i know that isn't going to happen because if the og hippo alliance falls apart then that leaves a lot of room for uncertainty. however i do know if we go to tribal more than 1 more time after this i will be the next one to leave the game because i am the lowest on the totem pole for the og hippo alliance. it sucks and i don't want to do it but i think i have no choice but to vote with the hippos damnit

( AS MADELINE )

Wow Madeline is annoying huh?

Oh my god that last confessional was ME djxjsjdjf

(((((Host: bitch >.> ))))

Love Antiope turning into the new Copa... not a good run so far. I'm siding with the Hippolyta majority to vote out Raymond, and after that, me, Jordan, and Lily will become the majority if we have to vote someone out again. Or maybe I'm just gonna get voted out and then I'll just die. Who knows.

[eorumverba]

Nine Days

(x)

happy birthday @sluthyun ily lots 

Jonghyun can’t help hiding his face with his hands, flustered both at Taemin’s would-be interrogation and at Jinki’s message. He doesn’t have to look up to know that Taemin will have that infuriating half-smirk on his lips, so he swallows his flustered grin and says, “Someone liked Blue Night, and they messaged me about it. Their name is Jinki, and they’re really sweet and nice and funny.”

Day One

Jonghyun is lazing in bed instead of studying; his screen is split into two so he can see Taemin on skype and his tumblr dashboard at the same time. His phone blinks and maybe it’s redundant to have tumblr open on mobile and on his laptop, but…

dlstmxkakwldrl: i rly like the way you talk about ur loved ones !! the way u talk about taemin esp is soft and cute and so ;;;;;;;;

“What happened, Jonghyunnie?” Jonghyun doesn’t even have to look up at him to know that Taemin’s got that smile on his lips, the one that is fond, amused and exasperated all at once.

Jonghyun looks up and over at him, smiling as brightly and innocently as he can. “Dunno what you’re talking about.”

“You’re really going to try that? With me? I know you’re not doing your homework, and I know you have a lot. You’ve been putting it off for at least a week, Jonghyunnie.”

“I am doing my-”

dlstmxkakwldrl: though im sure he’s not as cute as u

Jonghyun can’t help hiding his face with his hands, flustered both at Taemin’s would-be interrogation and at Jinki’s message. He doesn’t have to look up to know that Taemin will have that infuriating half-smirk on his lips, so he swallows his flustered grin and says, “Someone liked Blue Night, and they messaged me about it. Their name is Jinki, and they’re really sweet and nice and funny.”

jonghyun.948: i kjhjkhgj thank u sm ;;;; hes my best friend so i love him a lot;;; im hjkhjh glad u like it

jonghyun.948: we’re talking now actually hjjgjh

“Blue Night…I’m proud of you for that, you know? It’s grown so much since we met.”

“Ah…” Flustered, Jonghyun shakes his head. “Thank you.”

“What did your crush say?”

Jonghyun ignores Taemin’s teasing and mumbles, “Shut up.” Louder, “They said they listen to Blue Night every Friday, and that they like my songs more than the ones I play by other people, and they think I have a nice voice and that they like when I talk about you.”

“And...I’m guessing you already have a crush on them.”

Taemin looks at something else behind his computer and then laughs, and then Jongin is taking up half the screen, grinning wickedly. “You’ve got a crush?”

dlstmxkakwldrl: tell him hi

jonghyun.948: no hes being rlly mean;;; hes teasing me

dlstmxkakwldrl: why?

jonghyun.948: ;;;;;

jonghyun.948: not telling

“I don’t have a crush.”

Taemin’s and Jongin’s matching grins of exasperation and fondness are horribly  pixelated but Jonghyun can practically see how smug they are right now. Even though he does not have a crush.

“You’re so predictable, Jjong. It’s honestly adorable. So, what’s the story?”

“Their name is Jinki and they’re really cute and sweet and nice and funny and-”

“They listen to Blue Night and they complimented our Jonghyunnie. That’s literally it.”

dlstmxkakwldrl: why not?

jonghyun.948: flustering

dlstmxkakwldrl: tell me anyway

jonghyun.948: ;;; taem knows me best and i !! didnt even do anything to give it away but;; he nd his roomate are teasing me that i have a crush on u

dlstmxkakwldrl: djfslkdjflsdkf oh my god that is so cute

jonghyun.948: taem was like “what did ur crush say?” and jongin came over like “u have a crush” nd i khjhgjhg

dlstmxkakwldrl: SDFKLSFD THAT IS SO ADORABLE

jonghyun.948: kgjgjfjd st o p omg

dlstmxkakwldrl: ahh no oh my god ur so cute im !!!!!!

Jonghyun is pretty sure he actually makes a noise at that, and he rolls over to bury his face in the sheets to muffle his giggles. When he peeps back over at Taemin and Jongin, they look seconds away from laughing, and he mumbles, “They called me cute.”

“How many times has he giggled so far?”

“How many times do you think Kibum threatened to lock him out of the room?”

“Twice!” comes from Kibum and Jonghyun turns his laptop so his roommate, who is hard at work, can wave. Then comes the ping of a new message and Jonghyun quickly brings his laptop back into his lap and giggles again as he begins to type.

dlstmxkakwldrl: sdfjslkdjfsdf im amused at the fact that they could Guess that fast sdfkdsf

jonghyun.948: apparently im rlly obvious kffjhd theyre teasing me now tt

jonghyun.948: this is Your fault tho I'm blaming u

dlstmxkakwldrl: i’ll Gladly take the blame

“So what’s happened now?”

“I told them that you two were teasing me about my crush-” Jonghyun pauses, “about how you think I have a crush on them. And then they called me cute and-”

Kibum gags and Jongin bursts out laughing, says, “That’s sickening.”

jonghyun.948: do it quickly nd face ur Punishment

dlstmxkakwldrl: ckafldlskdf can i just say again that ur rly adorable bc skfdjdf u Are

jonghyun.948: jphjjhjg I literally??? Just got over being flustered stop omg

dlstmxkakwldrl: AHHHH

dlstmxkakwldrl: my mission is a Success then

jonghyun.948: bhkhigi ihu omg

“Jjong, you’ve been smiling and giggling for the past few minutes.”

“That gross fond smile too,” Taemin adds. ”The one you only have when you’re talking to a cute tall boy.”

“I am not!” When Jonghyun checks his reflection in the tiny box on the skype screen, he sees that he in fact is. He almost wants to turn his camera off, but that’ll just give Taemin and Jongin more satisfaction at being right.

“Anyway,” he starts, “I’m going to go to bed, it’s late.”

Kibum snorts, and Jonghyun twists around to stick his tongue out at them. “Goodnight, you two devils.”

Neither Taemin nor Jongin flinch at the nickname, just wave and hang up. Jonghyun is quick to close his laptop and turn out the light on his side of the room before settling into bed. “Night night, Kibummie.”

“Have fun with your crush, Jonghyunnie.”

Jonghyun decides to ignore them, and he fumbles for his stuffed puppy to kiss her good night as well before opening the tumblr app.

dlstmxkakwldrl: But Do U Really

jonghyun.948: i ljhhjgj am not gonna answer that

jonghyun.948: i will say that im mad at you tho

jonghyun.948: super super mad

dlstmxkakwldrl: lkdfsdfjklsdf the absolute Angriest i can imagine

dlstmxkakwldrl: i keep saying i Know but listen ur so cute i just keeping being all !!

Jonghyun rolls over and wiggles in place, ignoring Kibum’s snickers before holding Roo up to his face and peeping out at his phone over her head. Jinki is so so so flustering and even though it’s nearing 1:30 in the morning, all he wants to do is keep talking to them.

jonghyun.948: lis te n i am Frowning at u

jonghyun.948: or i would be if I....could stop Smiling but that's aside the point

dlstmxkakwldrl: i hop e  u know that i feel like ur pouting rn and it only makes this cuter sdjfsdf

jonghyun.948: i gjjgfjfh would but i can't stop smiling kgjgf

jonghyun.948: roo is covering the messages so I don't get even More flustered tho

jonghyun.948: roo jllhgj is my stuffed puppy

dlstmxkakwldrl: ahhhhHHH u have a little stuffed puppy !!!!

jonghyun.948: ;;;;; shh

jonghyun.948: you’re mean

dlstmxkakwldrl: and ur the Most adorable person this is very important to say

jonghyun.948: !! False false false

dlstmxkakwldrl: !! no its true true true !!

jonghyun.948: pouting at you

jonghyun.948: super mad

dlstmxkakwldrl: OHHHH MY GOD

dlstmxkakwldrl: ok u were right u aren't cute u are Absolutely Precious

jonghyun.948: jlhkggk shh omg

jonghyun.948: my face hurts from smiling tt

dlstmxkakwldrl: ifkskaka im happy u are smiling

jonghyun.948: hokhgjvn gn

dlstmxkakwldrl: ive said this a million times but ur so cute okay

jonghyun.948: just Wait until u see my face yike

dlstmxkakwldrl: i bet ur the absolute cutest

jonghyun.948: no;;; I look twelve tt

jonghyun.948: everything about me is small tt

dlstmxkakwldrl: shush i bet u like the most Adorable

dlstmxkakwldrl: ur personality is honestly just like rly precious

jonghyun.948: ;;; do u have snap? ill prove u wrong when its light out

dlstmxkakwldrl: yeah @skehehdanfdldi

Jonghyun is almost surprised at the keysmash, but it’s...almost endearing, and he’s quick to add Jinki on snap. Then he remembers the picture of him and Roo (his real dog, back home) and sends that through chat. Somehow, it’s nearly 3am, and maybe he’s tired, but Jinki’s here. Jonghyun finds that he always wants them to be here.

jonghyun.948: look!

jonghyun.948: thats roo!

jonghyun.948: my real roo, not my plushie roo

dlstmxkakwldrl: UR CUTE OKAY

jonghyun.948: nnnnnnno

dlstmxkakwldrl: YES !!!

dlstmxkakwldrl: ur so cute ffhhdfd u should rly rest now though

dlstmxkakwldrl: it's rly late there i shouldn't have kept you up so much

jonghyun.948: i;;;; only have a final at 5:30 tmm night I can sleep in

jonghyun.948: nd ;;; I don't mind it was nice

dlstmxkakwldrl: okay im glad you don't have a morning class or anything dgjkdd

dlstmxkakwldrl: but it Was nice !!

jonghyun.948: ;;;;; ssh

jonghyun.948: sleep soon too if its late

jonghyun.948: i ;;;; ye gn im sleepy

jonghyun.948: nighty night

dlstmxkakwldrl: night!! rest well ;;

Day Two

Thursday is largely uneventful; Jonghyun only has his one calc final that evening, and after, Taemin convinces him to go get takeout to celebrate, even though Jonghyun is largely sure that he’s failed. Taemin is getting takeout now as well and Kibum is out - likely at the library - so Jonghyun has the room to himself, but he waits for Taemin to get home and on skype to start eating.

“So,” is the first thing he says, “how’s your crush?”

Jonghyun would roll over and away if he didn’t have food in his lap; as it were, he pouts at Taemin and shakes his head. “We didn’t talk today.”

But Taemin is still grinning, smug and expectant, so Jonghyun continues. “We talked a lot last night and it was really fun and they’re so-”

“Jonghyunnie, I don’t need a rundown of how cute and funny and sweet and nice they are.” Taemin’s teasing again, and Jonghyun’s pout deepens.

“Mad at you then.”

“Mmhm, I’ll go then. Bye-”

“No! Stay.” Jonghyun’s phone lights up as he speaks and he wiggles excitedly in his seat, because when he unlocks his phone, it’s a message from Jinki. It’s nothing special, just a short greeting, but it still makes his heart flutter and a grin spread over his lips.

“I’m guessing you’re talking to Jinki, huh? What did he say?”

dlstmxkakwldrl: helo............

“Just hi.”

jonghyun.948: ;;; i missed you

jonghyun.948: khkhvj im skyping tae nd he just oh you're talking to jinki aren't u nd I khgigu

dlstmxkakwldrl: THATS SO CUTE

dlstmxkakwldrl: the way u get flustered is Adorable and also tell taem i say hi

“Jinki says hi,” Jonghyun reports, and he doesn’t know why he’s giggling, but he is. Taemin kind of just hums like he doesn’t quite believe him, but when Jonghyun looks at him, he’s grinning.

“You’re cute when you have a crush, Jonghyunnie.”

Jonghyun wants to say that he doesn’t have a crush, but at this point, he probably definitely does.

jonghyun.948: vkhkjvvu shut omg nd Also he says hi

dlstmxkakwldrl: i will Never shush

jonghyun.948: im......frowning at u??? The meanest

dlstmxkakwldrl: my mental picture right now is

dlstmxkakwldrl: that tiny fight emoticon

dlstmxkakwldrl: (ง'̀-'́)ง you

“Jonghyun, you’re giggling.” Taemin sounds exasperated, but in that fond way that means that he doesn’t really care.

“I’m - it’s Jinki.”

Taemin snorts, shakes his head. “I almost feel bad for Kibum.”

“Kibummie’s at a final, hush.”

jonghyun.948: i vkjg well tiny is right rip im;;;; 5'7

dlstmxkakwldrl: T I N Y

dlstmxkakwldrl: THE TINIEST

dlstmxkakwldrl: i am Spiritually squishing ur cheeks

“They said they’re squishing my cheeks!”

“How come you don’t get all flustered when I say stuff like that?”

Pause. “I…”

Taemin seems to realize, because he bites his lip and shakes his head, mumbles, “Never mind.”

“I think I should go. It’s...late anyway.”

It’s barely 12:30, and they’ve stayed up much longer, and Taemin seems to know this, because he just nods and says a quiet, “Good night,” before hanging up. Laptop put away, Jonghyun settles in bed before turning on his phone to answer Jinki.

jonghyun.948: i;;; have a question

jonghyun.948: bc like. Just? u know i like you nd just khjfjf what are boundaries i guess

It’s a long few minutes before Jinki answers, and Jonghyun almost falls asleep before they do, but at the buzz of his phone, he quickly wakes up again. He’s suddenly nervous, remembering what he’s about to ask, and he bites his lip before unlocking his phone.

dlstmxkakwldrl: Elaborate on what u mean by boundaries

jonghyun.948: just;; you keep calling me cute and i need to know?? If it’s platonic? bc i know its only been day but i get crushes really easily and i dont want to misread anything

Kibum comes back in bearing a smoothie that they give to Jonghyun. They pet his hair as Jonghyun takes his first sip (he can taste mango and strawberry, so it’s perfect), then scratch gently at his scalp until Jonghyun hums out his praise. “Did well on my final, I think,” they say, before dumping their stuff on their bed and flopping down as well. “Where’s Tae?”

“We...talked. And then we hung up. Um. Thank you for the smoothie, Kibummie?”

“How’s your Jinki then?”

“Oh! I forgot I was talking to them...having an important conversation with them.”

Kibum waves a lazy, sleepy hand and curls into a loose ball, likely already more than half asleep. Jonghyun grabs Roo and kisses her head before unlocking his phone again, which is already blinking a message from Jinki.

dlstmxkakwldrl: oh djsnsj right that but Anyway yeah i am definitely being flirty rn bc i definitely feel a little bit of a crush so !! no worries that is reciprocated

jonghyun.948: ;;; flustering

jonghyun.948: i feel like i should say more but;; flustered

dlstmxkakwldrl: u should say more………

Jonghyun’s heart is racing and he reaches over to turn out the lights and get comfortable in bed before answering, typing slowly and burying his face into Roo’s softness to keep his embarrassment in.

jonghyun.948: im;; definitely more than a little crush;; bc every time i got a notif id be disappointed if it wasnt;; and i was counting down the hours until u got back;; i just really like talking to u nd i kept;; thinking of how u called me cute and it made me rlly happy;;; taem nd his roommate kept teasing me and its just rlly obvious how happy u make me nd i hjkhgj im comfy with u nd i like u a Lot thats all;;

dlstmxkakwldrl: ahh oh my god im ;;;;;; im happy ur comfy w me bc i also felt very immediately comfortable talking with u!! it's rly easy to talk with u so im just all !! i rly enjoy talking to you

The next time Jonghyun unlocks his phone, it’s nearly 4am, and he pouts to himself, taking a sip of his long-since melted smoothie and squinting at the brightness of his phone. He’s not sure if Jinki will still be awake, but now that he’s woken up, he may as well message them. He certainly hopes they’ll be awake anyway, wants to talk to them until they fall asleep again.

jonghyun.948: i;; fell asleep ;-;

dlstmxkakwldrl: khjjhg u should go back to sleep

jonghyun.948: ;;;; but you're only here when it's late

dlstmxkakwldrl: ill talk to u earlier than Late tomorrow i promise dhgxgh

jonghyun.948: ;; still dont wann go

dlstmxkakwldrl: gcchjfdd cute i don't want u to go either But its late and u have to

jonghyun.948: ;;; then you Have to be here earlier tmm

dlstmxkakwldrl: i will be here earlier bc i Promised

jonghyun.948: ;; night night then

dlstmxkakwldrl: rest well

After turning off his phone, Jonghyun kisses Roo one more time before wiggling into a more comfortable position and curling into Roo so his face is pressed into the back of her head like they’re spooning. Even though his mind is racing with thoughts of Jinki and him and them, he falls asleep almost immediately.

The last thing he thinks about before he falls asleep is of Jinki, here, spooning him to sleep.

Day Three

Jonghyun doesn’t wake until nearly noon; Kibum is out and as soon as Taemin answers his message, they skype; Jonghyun can hear faint snoring and giggles because the deepness of Jongin’s sleep and the strength of his snores never gets old for some reason.

“Hey, Jonghyunnie.” Taemin looks adorably sleep-rumpled even though he’s been up for hours, and Jonghyun’s heart stutters in his chest for not the first time, but all he does is smile and wave to Taemin, pushing down the flutter of feeling in his heart.

“Hi hi!”

“You sure slept late.”

“Talked to Jinki until like...4am. They-” Jonghyun lifts Roo to cover his blooming smile, and when he speaks again, he does it through poorly stifled giggles. “We talked about a lot.”

“Like?”

“Not telling!”

“Why not?”

“Cuz you’re Taemin.” Pause. “I want you to meet Jinki.”

“That’s practically a given, silly.”

“And!” Jonghyun wiggles in place and kisses Roo before continuing, “guess! Guess what!”

“Hm?”

“I asked them something earlier and they said they like someone!”

“And...I’m guessing it’s you?”

“Not talking to you. I’m mad at you.”

“For being right?” Taemin lifts a hand to push his smile down and Jonghyun sticks his tongue out at him before shaking his head.

“For being mean! Roo’s mad at you too.”

“Oh no,” Taemin’s voice is dripping with insincerity and Jonghyun does not like him anymore, “how unfortunate. Wonder how I’ll ever be able to recover from this.”

“Talk to Jinki!”

“I’ll be nice to your boyfriend, Jonghyunnie.”

Boyfriend. Taemin’s grinning like he knows how flustered he’s making Jonghyun, and all Jonghyun can do is bury his face in the blankets and mumble that Jinki is not his boyfriend. As much as he may want them to be.

“Do you think they like me?”

“How could they not? You’re perfect, Jonghyunnie. Cute and funny and precious and-” Taemin cuts himself off, shakes his head. “If they don’t now, they will. And if they don’t then, they’re blind.”

Jonghyun sucks in a useless breath and bites his lip, trying to bite down his pleased, flustered grin. “Thank you, Taeminnie.”

“...Of course, Jonghyunnie.”

“I really really like them, Tae. I…” Jonghyun looks down at his phone and decides to send part of their conversation from yesterday, of his admission and Jinki’s addition. Remembering what Jinki had said makes him giggle and hide his face with his hands, and when he looks at Taemin through his fingers, he’s reading the texts Jonghyun had sent.

“That’s cute, Jonghyunnie.”

“Do you think they like me? I want them to…”

“Didn’t you say before that they said they have a crush on you?”

“They only said a little crush, cuz of how flustered I get. Want them to like me.”

“They will, Jonghyunnie. It’s only been two days, not everyone gets crushes as fast as you.”

Jonghyun opens his mouth to argue, then closes it because yeah, Taemin’s right. Again. “Just...they’re so cute and I like them so much.”

Taemin reaches out and touches his computer screen in that absent way he sometimes does when he’s meaning to run his fingers through Jonghyun’s hair, comfort him quietly. “Don’t worry so much, Jonghyunnie. It’ll all work itself out. Besides, I talked to them and...they’re sweet. I like them.”

“I’m happy!”

“Good, that’s all that matters.”

Jonghyun decides to check tumblr, first skimming through all of the messages in his inbox and then hiding his face when he sees the message that had been left for him, only about an hour after he’d fallen asleep.

dlstmxkakwldrl: my Last Thing of The Night is to remind u that ur the cutest

“What did Jinki say?”

“Just that I’m cute. The cutest.”

jonghyun.948: ;;; thank u

“It’s true, silly.”

“Just…they’re flustering.”

“I know, love. It’s very cute.”

Jonghyun lets Roo rest on his face so Taemin won’t see his pout, and when Taemin laughs, Jonghyun mumbles, “Can we watch a movie?”

“Don’t have time. I have a final at 2, Jonghyunnie. Maybe after.”

“Mad at you then.”

“Mm, poor baby. Did you eat yet?”

“Not yet, will while you have your test.”

“Good boy.”

“Think I’m gonna nap too.” Jonghyun isn’t sure why he says it like it’s a question, but Taemin nods like he understands, like he always does.

“I’m gonna study, okay Jonghyunnie?”

“Leaving?”

“No, just gonna be quiet. And Jongin wants me to tell you hi.”

“Hi hi, Jonginnie!”

A few beats, and then Jongin pops up on the screen, upside down. He says something that Jonghyun can’t hear, then disappears, and Taemin relays, “He’s going out to eat breakfast and then he’s off to the library, and he said he hopes you can talk to Jinki soon again.”

“Ah! Thank you!”

“Cute,” Taemin says, but it’s mostly to himself. That is the last that is said for a while, and despite his efforts to stay awake, Jonghyun falls asleep to the quiet sounds filtered through his earbuds: the pages of Taemin’s textbooks rustling, his voice as he mumbles foreign terms to himself, his quiet and absent hums.

When he wakes again, Taemin is long gone and Kibum is back, and they’re curled up on their bed, reading a book. “Kibummie,” Jonghyun mumbles, half asleep and falling fast. “Cuddle?”

Kibum takes one look at him and then they’re on their way, curling tight around him and holding him close, so that Jonghyun falls asleep to Kibum’s soft hands draped over his own and Kibum’s body warm against his.

Jonghyun jolts awake sometime around 11pm and Kibum is still asleep, but Jonghyun’s phone is blinking and he bites back giggles as he unlocks his phone, already anticipating what Jinki will have said.

dlstmxkakwldrl: i said,,id be on earlier today and then i still ended up being here late im sdkfksdfk

jonghyun.948: jkhhjghj its ok i missed u a lot but i was Super Patient

jonghyun.948: if u ask anyone else i wasnt at All but :') u dont have to ask anyone else

dlstmxkakwldrl: kljflsdf well i dont have to ask anyone else bc u told me Urself

jonghyun.948: ;;; anyw taem said he migth message u So if u get a message from chaitae thats him

dlstmxkakwldrl: we talked last night actually but i have to answer him rip

dlstmxkakwldrl: im normally Super bad at answering ppl

jonghyun.948: ;; u werent bad at answering me

dlstmxkakwldrl: sdfkjsldf welll  ,

jonghyun.948: well What

dlstmxkakwldrl: well ur v easy to talk to So sdfkjsdf

dlstmxkakwldrl: i was skyping w a friend the past few days and he was like sdfkjsjkdf jinki u dont normally answer messages this often bc i kept being all Wait i need 2 answer someone

As Jonghyun types, he bites back giggles and grabs Roo from her place next to his pillow, kissing her gently and waiting until the butterflies in his stomach stop fluttering so much to answer.

jonghyun.948: that’s;;; rlly cute

jonghyun.948: I kghbd thought i dreamt that u said u have a tiny crush too nd dkhghd earlier i went back to Check nd;;;;;;

dlstmxkakwldrl: THATS SO CUTE

dlstmxkakwldrl: but no it was very much Not  a Dream i can assure u sksdf

jonghyun.948: s h u t im hkjhgj still flustered otl

dlstmxkakwldrl: CUTIE

dlstmxkakwldrl: youre always flustered it is Endearing

jonghyun.948: ;; im usually not ;; youre just a flustering person

dlstmxkakwldrl: am i how so

jonghyun.948: do i Rlly have to Say It dfhhd

dlstmxkakwldrl: oh u absolutely do

jonghyun.948: Gkjfjdj

dlstmxkakwldrl: hold up ive got to look up Gkjfjdj in the dictionary

jonghyun.948: >:\ I was Gonna say it but now im Not

dlstmxkakwldrl: skdfljklsdfjsdf Were you rlly Were You

jonghyun.948: I Was i was typing nd everything

dlstmxkakwldrl: i hope u can Feel my disbelief waves

jonghyun.948: !!! Now ur rlly not getting it

dlstmxkakwldrl: hmm i think i will Just U Wait im rly good at getting answers

jonghyun.948: Nope my mouth is Sealed

dlstmxkakwldrl: is it Rly this time

jonghyun.948: mmhm if you wanna know you're gonna have to Make me tell

dlstmxkakwldrl: i Always have to make u instead of u just telling me

jonghyun.948: you like it though

dlstmxkakwldrl: well Maybe i do

Jonghyun bites his lip, shifting in place and trying not to make any noise. Because the last time something like this had happened, well.

jonghyun.948: youre certainly indulging me enough to say so

dlstmxkakwldrl: and u still need to tell me whatever it was u didnt tell me earlier

jonghyun.948: fine ill tell

dlstmxkakwldrl: good Finally

jonghyun.948: anyw you're flustering bc i rlly like you a lot gkjddh nd i want you to like me too tt nd i??? Rlly dont get this flustered over crushes Ever? nd Ye basically im too small to contain all the feelings i have

dlstmxkakwldrl: sdklfsdfklsdf thats so cute ;;;; ur too tiny but ur emotions are very Big

jonghyun.948: ;;;; your fault

dlstmxkakwldrl: im so sdfsdklf how flustered u get is great

dlstmxkakwldrl: ill take the blame

jonghyun.948: also ! when did u realize u had a crush i ;; wanna know

dlstmxkakwldrl: idek just when u kept getting all flustered when i called u cute

dlstmxkakwldrl: i think its legitimately sweet how flustered u get

jonghyun.948: ;;; anyw

dlstmxkakwldrl: yes ,

jonghyun.948: i hkjg might fall asleep soon otl i slept all day but still;;; still tired

jonghyun.948: so if u have any Last Words while im awake

dlstmxkakwldrl: my last words Are

jonghyun.948: if its saying im cute istg

dlstmxkakwldrl: well i think u Want to me say that

jonghyun.948: i jlkhk false

dlstmxkakwldrl: but i guess if u truly Dont i wont call u cute then

jonghyun.948: im frowning at u ur mean

dlstmxkakwldrl: well im just doing what u want Arent I

Day Four

When Jonghyun wakes up, he debates answering Jinki’s message, but decides against it. There’s...something he needs to talk to Jinki about, but he’s too nervous, and just...he’s not good at things like this.

And Kibum must see his inner turmoil, because they suddenly announce that they’re going to take him out to celebrate the end of finals, to the movies and to lunch. When Jonghyun protests and reminds Kibum that they still have two more tests, Kibum just rolls their eyes and says, “They’re online though, and honestly, I don’t really care about those. I already have an A in both of those classes anyway.”

The movie theater they go to is small, nearly empty, and it’s one of those eat-in theaters, so they share a giant peach smoothie while they watch the movie. Jonghyun’s mind is half on the movie, half on Jinki: he wants Jinki here, on his other side, wants them to hold his hand the way Kibum is now, wants to curl up in Jinki’s lap and watch the movie from there.

“Kibummie,” Jonghyun whispers, leaning into them and wiggling happily when Kibum squeezes his hand, thumb running gently over his knuckles. “Kibummie, I wish Jinki were here.”

“One day, Jonghyunnie. You and me and Tae and Jongin and Jinki.”

“I want that.”

Kibum laughs a little under their breath and nods, bringing Jonghyun’s hand up to their mouth to kiss it. “One day, Jonghyunnie.”

They get burgers after the movie and Kibum pays for it all: two bacon cheeseburgers, a giant soda and a giant thing of fries that they share. Jonghyun’s just...watching Kibum eat when he suddenly remembers how Jongin and Taemin had jokingly started calling Kibum his caregiver. Neither he nor Kibum really mind the recurring joke, mostly because of how close they are with each other. But Kibum is just someone that Jonghyun is comfortable with, and Kibum enjoys spoiling and babying him - that’s the extent of their relationship, really.

(Although, Jonghyun had jokingly called Kibum daddy once, and all Kibum had done was look over with this amused look on their face before saying, “yes, baby?”)

“Was it Jonginnie or Taeminnie that said you’re my caregiver?” Jonghyun almost drops a joking ‘daddy’ in there, but decides against it because while Kibum would never make fun of him for it, they both know how Jonghyun feels about that kink.

“I think it was Jongin, but they’re both...you know.” Kibum holds out a fry for Jonghyun to take and Jonghyun obediently leans across the table to eat it, wiggling in place at Kibum’s quiet, “good boy.”

“I like them a lot, they’re fun.”

“I’m glad you do, Jonghyunnie. I like them too.”

“Good. Kibummie?”

“Yeah?”

“Can you...want you to look at this. Cuz I feel like Jinki likes me but I don’t know and I want them to like me but-”

“Slow down, Jonghyunnie. Didn’t you say that they told you they have a crush on you?”

“But...they only said a bit of a crush. And that only because of how flustered I get. And just, if I don’t get flustered, then they wouldn’t like me, and I want them to like me. Me, not just how flustered I get.”

Kibum’s eyes are narrowed and their gaze is sharp, but they nod gently and hold their hand out for Jonghyun’s phone, so Jonghyun takes it out and opens up his chat with Jinki, scrolls all the way up to the top. Remembering what they’d talked about the day before, and the day before that makes him blush and he quickly adds, “Ignore the...how needy I got. Please?”

Kibum just snorts and nods, already reading through their messages. “This is...so gay, honestly. Disgustingly so.” But they’re smiling, and their voice is fond, so Jonghyun relaxes, just a little.

“Do you think they like me?”

“Definitely. You guys have been flirting so much, jeez. It’s a wonder they haven’t asked you out yet. And I know you’re too shy to, huh?”

Jonghyun nods and opens his mouth for another fry, and as he chews, his mouth falls into a pout without permission. Kibum sees and kind of laughs a little, then wrinkles their nose as they look at Jonghyun’s phone. “You were needy,” they say, and Jonghyun groans.

“Don’t remind me…”

“I think it’s cute.”

Jonghyun does not blush. “Just, keep reading. Thank you.”

“The amount of times they called you cute is sickening.”

“Kibummie.”

“Sorry, Jonghyunnie. I finished reading though. I really think they like you, though. Or they certainly enjoy flirting with you.”

Jonghyun hides his face with his hands and giggles, flustered but pleased. “Thanks, Kibummie.”

“Anything for you, my Jonghyunnie.”

Kibum leans across the table to thumb at Jonghyun’s cheek, and Jonghyun leans into the touch, pressing his lips to Kibum’s hand as it leaves. “Kibummie, love you a lot lot lot.”

“Love you too, Jonghyunnie. Ready to get out of here?”

Jonghyun looks down at his burger, half-finished, and nods. Kibum waits patiently for him to wrap up the remains of his meal and then they stand together, hurrying out to Kibum’s car because it’s now starting to rain.

They curl up together in Kibum’s bed with a movie playing quietly between them, and the sound of the rain pattering down around them lulls them to sleep early in the evening.

Day Five

jonghyun.948: i,,,,,have an Important question. for whenever u get home

dlstmxkakwldrl: okay im at Home we can have whatever discussion now

jonghyun.948: just;; boundaries aggain i guess. bc of what happened before;; and just;;;; im fine with doing stuff like that i just;;

jonghyun.948: it seemed more important before hkjhjgjh its not now tho Tbh u can ignore that

dlstmxkakwldrl: ddksk no no u were right it's definitely v important to talk about boundaries

dlstmxkakwldrl: im also Completely More Than Fine with doing anything like that again but yea if u have any Specific boundaries u want to bring up

jonghyun.948: just,,idk hjkhjg where do you stand i guess?

dlstmxkakwldrl: im also Completely More Than Fine with doing anything like that again but yea if u have any Specific boundaries u want to bring up

jonghyun.948: nothing new;; i just want to know where u stand. emotionally

jonghyun.948: mostly,,i think i was just nervous bc what if you thought Less of me

dlstmxkakwldrl: ahh why would i think less of u?? I would never think less of u for anything like that like Ever

jonghyun.948: ;;; i want u to like me;; not just my flustered reactions

dlstmxkakwldrl: ofc i do like you outside of ur flustered reactions (although they're v cute !!) bc that's not all you are

jonghyun.948: ;;;;; just its been like 2 days nd im not,,,that special or anything so

dlstmxkakwldrl: i think you are special though, even if it has been a v short amount of time

jonghyun.948: ;;;;;; my heart fluttered;; thank you

dlstmxkakwldrl: cute ,,,,,

jonghyun.948: thank u;;

Day Six

dlstmxkakwldrl: 💕💕💕💕

dlstmxkakwldrl: gsgfddgn sorry i fell asleep so early last night i was Exhausted

jonghyun.948: jkhjkghj i Figured

dlstmxkakwldrl: snkskdk yea i was apparently rly tired i haven't slept at midnight in Forever

jonghyun.948: ;; i missed u

dlstmxkakwldrl: djskakkddm ahh cute im 💕💕

jonghyun.948: ;; no youre the cute one;;;;; really endearing

dlstmxkakwldrl: s h u t u are wrong

jonghyun.948: im Right tho ur super cute

dlstmxkakwldrl: 😡😡😡

jonghyun.948: the cutest ily

dlstmxkakwldrl: angery

jonghyun.948: u spelled cute wrong

dlstmxkakwldrl: a n g e r y

jonghyun.948: u spelled super cute wrong

jonghyun.948: u rlly need to learn to spell

dlstmxkakwldrl: sweaty i have 4882193828828283828382838174832818478382477337737372838282 phds i know Spelling and the spelling bible says ur the cute one

jonghyun.948: *im not ur

dlstmxkakwldrl: now who's bad at spelling

jonghyun.948: you…...im the cute one is what u meant nor ur

dlstmxkakwldrl: i Meant What I Said

jonghyun.948: false,

dlstmxkakwldrl: true,

jonghyun.948: anyw……….

dlstmxkakwldrl: yes ,

jonghyun.948: ;;; me nd tae are skyping and;; want you to be here too

dlstmxkakwldrl: ah no no it's fine skksk u guys can just keep doing ur thing

dlstmxkakwldrl: esp since i should work when i get home anyway dmskskd rip

jonghyun.948: but Consider....Not working

dlstmxkakwldrl: i Will consider

jonghyun.948: good luck in ur work tho ♡♡♡

dlstmxkakwldrl: thank u bb

Jonghyun promptly giggles and hides his face, and Taemin barely even blinks.

Day Seven

dlstmxkakwldrl: i finished all of my work………….

jonghyun.948: !!! taems at a final but when he gets back we’re gonna skype and;; want you to be here too

dlstmxkakwldrl: give me une momento it's about time i did i Guess

jonghyun.948: !!! okay! my skype name is the same as this

So needless to say, Jonghyun is excited when Taemin finally comes back from his last final; when he tells Taemin everything that had occured, Taemin just smiles and rolls his eyes and nods. “So where are they?”

“Waiting for them to message me.”

“Excited?”

“Excited, but nervous too. Really nervous.”

“Why?”

“Haven’t seen their face, and just...nervous. What if they think I’m-”

“Jonghyunnie, calm down. It’ll be fine, okay?”

“Okay- ah! They messaged!” Jonghyun wiggles in place and picks up Roo, hiding behind her as his heart races in his chest. “Super nervous.”

“It’ll be fine, Jonghyunnie. You know it will be.”

“Okay...gonna add.”

It’s a moment, but when Jinki fades into the screen, they’re looking at their phone. But then they look up and they smile and Jonghyun’s heart flutters in his chest. “Hi Taemin, Jonghyun.”

“Hi, Jinki. Nice to finally meet you after all of Jjong’s gushing.”

“I didn’t gush!”

“You were definitely gushing, Jonghyunnie.”

“I...just like them. You. A lot.”

“Cute, Jonghyunnie.” Jinki says, and Jonghyun hides behind Roo again, trying to bite back giggles. He shakes his head and looks at Jinki through his screen, at their bright smile and their warm gaze, and he finally lets the giggles fall from his lips.

“Thank you, Jinki…”

“God, you’re so gay, Jonghyunnie.”

Jonghyun...had honestly forgotten Taemin was there for a moment, and he says as such; Taemin snorts and rolls his eyes and says, “This is what I get for being your friend, Jonghyunnie? Jinki, take note of this, this is what you’ll get if you stay with him.”

“Cute...he’s cute so it’s fine.”

Jonghyun actually makes a noise at that, and buries his face in his hands before shaking his head. “You’re mean.”

“And you’re cute, Jonghyunnie.”

“Wow...I think I’ll just go, since I’m not needed.”

“No! Taeminnie, stay!”

“Anything for you, Jonghyunnie.”

“It’s different when you say Jonghyunnie and when Jinki does.”

“How so?”

“It’s like a friend when you say it but when Jinki says it, it’s...dunno. I like it.”

“God, you’re gross. I’m leaving so you two can get more acquainted. I’ve got to sleep anyway, Jongin’s leaving early tomorrow and I’m helping him pack up his stuff.”

“Bye bye, Taeminnie…”

“Nice meeting you, Taemin.”

“You too, Jinki. Have fun with this one, talk to you both soon, bye.” Taemin hangs up, and when Jonghyun looks at Jinki again, he giggles.

“Hi hi.”

A fond snort. “You’re cute, Jonghyunnie. Cute baby.”

Jonghyun’s breath hitches and he shakes his head, gently putting Roo down and bringing his hand up to drag over his lower lip. A habit, albeit one that Taemin and Kibum have both told him not to do because your lips are distracting, Jonghyunnie.

“No?”

“I…” Jonghyun shifts and thumbs at his lip again, swallowing the lump in his throat and blinking wide-eyed at Jinki before trying again. “I don’t…”

“Don’t what? Be a good boy and tell me.”

Oh. Jonghyun shakes his head and shifts again, more pointedly this time. “Jinki, I...you’re being mean.”

“How am I being mean, Jonghyunnie?”

“Teasing.”

“I’ll stop, Jonghyunnie. What do you want to do, then?”

“Movie?”

“Anything you want, Jonghyunnie.”

Jonghyun’s heart flutters and he hides behind Roo again before nodding and waiting for Jinki to choose what to watch. Jinki’s never seen Moana, and while Jonghyun has, he doesn’t say so, because this way he gets to stare at Jinki for almost two full hours, and Jinki will be none the wiser.

When he texts Taemin to tell him that, all Taemin sends back is ‘thats gay, have fun’.

Jonghyun does.

Day Eight

The first thing Jonghyun sees when he blinks awake is Jinki - they’re still asleep and Jonghyun is quick to send Taemin, Kibum and Jongin a picture because they’re absolutely adorable, and Jonghyun is so in love.

That’s the first time, he realizes, that he’s...thought of what he feels for Jinki as love. (And it isn’t surprising, definitely won’t surprise Kibum or Taemin, because you always fall in love so easily, Jonghyunnie.) The realization makes a mix of emotions bubble up inside of him: a flutter of nerves, apprehension, yearning, but it’s all overshadowed by giddy, dizzy joy and all Jonghyun wants to do now is tell everyone that he’s in love, that he’s in love with someone that he’s only known for just over a week and only seen once, that he’s in love with Jinki.

But Kibum is asleep and Taemin isn’t answering his phone and Jongin isn’t either, so Jonghyun gets on tumblr and makes a post that only says “I’m in love, I’m in love, I’m in love”.  And there is nothing to do but wait until Jinki wakes up, so Jonghyun curls up in bed and starts plotting out little stories and themes for upcoming episodes of Blue Night; in between adding songs for the playlist for this week’s episode, Jonghyun answers the questions in his inbox. Most are asking about his crush (all Jonghyun says is that they’re lovely, they’re sweet, they’re perfect), some are thanking him for another week of Blue Night, and some still are general inquiries: how he’s doing (amazingly), what artist he likes recently (Sik-K), what movies he’s seen recently (late, but Doctor Strange).

Jinki blinks awake while Jonghyun is clearing out his watch later list on youtube, and they talk for all of five minutes before Jinki slips asleep again. It’s so so so endearing and Jonghyun texts Taemin to tell him because he is so in love.

The next time Jinki wakes, it’s well into the morning and Taemin is up, so Jonghyun adds him back into the call and listens to Jinki’s sleepy murmurs and Taemin’s lazy replies and Jongin’s long, drawn out goodbyes to Taemin, even though they’re going to be roommates again in the fall. Kibum comes over as well, nuzzles up against Jonghyun and takes the other earbud, greeting Jinki with a wry smile on their lips and genuine happiness in their eyes.

“So you’re the Jinki that’s been flustering our Jonghyunnie so much, huh?”

“I didn’t know I had that much of an effect on him.” Jinki’s biting back laughter and so are Kibum and Taemin, like they’re all in on some joke that Jonghyun is not. It’s infuriating, but Jonghyun doesn’t care that much, because all of his favorite people are here, and he’s so happy.

(He’s so happy that he overlooks all of the messages Taemin is sending him, even if Kibum doesn’t. Kibum is quick to take over Jonghyun’s laptop, and Jonghyun curls up into them and pouts at the messages they’re sending back and forth to Taemin.

taem: jonghyunnie ur rlly gay

taem: the way ur smiling at them? gross

jonghyunnie: arent they?

taem: so gay

jonghyunnie: u shldve seen them...gushing over whether or not jinki likes them or not

taem: its so obvious tha ttheydo tho?????

jonghyunnie: tell him that

taem: jognhyunnie, jinki likes u. ask them out

“I-” Jonghyun pauses, hides his pout in Kibum’s arm. “Never mind.”

“What’s wrong, Jonghyunnie?” Kibum asks - like they don’t know what’s wrong. Jonghyun pouts and shakes his head, ignores Taemin and Kibum’s laugh, Taemin’s explanation that they’d been teasing Jonghyun about his crush.

(He especially ignores the way Jinki chuckles and says, “It’s alright, he’s cute and I like him too.”)

The four of them stay together until that night, until Taemin and Jinki very reluctantly have to go. And it’s one of Jonghyun’s best days ever.

Day Nine

jonghyunnie: taem;; i like them a Lot;;;;;

taem: ik, im glad for u

jonghyunnie: but;;

jonghyunnie: okay this was a while ago but we;;;; they said they love me nd;;

taem: whats the problem then?

jonghyunnie: ;-; taem;;;;;

taem: ?

jonghyunnie: its not cute

taem: OH

taem: still tho if ur thinking they blurted it out bc of that

taem: they wouldve had to Type it so

taem: i dont think it was spur of the moment? but even if it was im p sure they meant it, they owudlnt just lie abt that

jonghyunnie: i like them a Lot;;;;

taem: pff ik

jonghyunnie: so i dont wanna;; i wanna Know

taem: then ask them, sily

jonghyunnie: but;;;;

taem: either ask or be patient, jonghyunnie

jonghyunnie: nervous;;

taem: itll be ok tho

jonghyunnie: ill ask;;;; nervous tho

taem: its gonna go well, jonghyunnie

jonghyunnie: how do i ask them?

taem: just...idk tell them there was stuff said that u wanna clarify. Or know how it was meant and how it applies normally and not just for that headspace

jonghyunnie: too nervous;;

taem: i believe in u

taem: just tell them u wanna be on the same page, its understandable

jonghyunnie: ask for me?

taem: u know i cant do that

jonghyunnie: ;-; wanna date them

taem: jonghyunnie.

taem: ud have to Ask them

jonghyunnie: ;;;;; ask for me

taem: i cant ask them out, jonghyunnie

jonghyunnie: ;-; how should i ask

taem: idk howd u ask me?

jonghyunnie: i didnt jkhhjkhgj u just said we’re bfs now

taem: oh

jonghyunnie: ;-;

jonghyunnie: ok im;;; gonna ask can i call u?

taem: ofc

Taemin picks up his phone on the first ring and once their greetings are out of the way, Jonghyun wiggles in place and pouts down at his phone. “I’m stuck. Wanna make it good.”

“You’re such a romantic, Jonghyunnie. It’s cute. Or it would be if you could ask them.”

“I’m asking! I just wanna make it good. For them.”

“Do you know what you want to say?”

“Just...that I like talking to them, and I really liked them since the beginning and that I wanna try dating.”

“Then just say that. I know you, and it doesn’t need to be eloquent or elaborate. So long as you mean it, Jonghyunnie. Trust me.”

“I…” Jonghyun fidgets and then takes in a breath to steady himself. “Yeah, okay. Okay. Gonna ask them. Gonna ask them to date me.”

“If only your fans could see you now, Jonghyunnie. If only Jinki could.”

“Shut up!”

“I can hear you pouting, silly.”

Jonghyun glares down at his phone and shakes his head before continuing his hesitant typing. He still definitely wants to make this eloquent, but he’s so nervous that he ends up sending without even proofing it. His fingers are trembling and his heart is racing but he’s done it and-

Jinki read it.

“Tae, they read it. I didn’t think they’d read it so soon I-”

“Jonghyunnie, calm down, it’s fine. Just wait and see what they say, okay.”

“Okay- oh. I...they answered.”

“What’s it say?”

“Uh, that they’d seen this coming, the dating thing. And that they want to try. That there’s stuff we’ve definitely got to talk about but that they really like me a lot and they want to try.”

“See, what did I tell you? And all in nine days, Jonghyunnie. That’s a new record.”

Jonghyun is just glad Taemin can’t see him now, because he knows he’s got that giddy smile on his lips, and he definitely knows that he’s blushing. Because Jinki likes him, and Jinki wants to be with him, and Jinki is with him.

“I gotta tell Kibummie, okay?”

A snort. “Okay, Jonghyunnie. Have fun with your crush - boyfriend.”

“Bye bye!” Jonghyun is too happy to let Taemin’s teasing affect him, and he’s quick to hang up and bound across the room to jump on Kibum until they wake up because he’s so happy.

(He doesn’t think he’s ever been happier.)

[makeyouleave]

Just like video game designers put super hard bosses/puzzles in their games to teach the player a new skill or encourage them to try a different approach, sometimes in real life shit breaks us, absolutely demolishes us so that we can rebuild ourselves in ways we couldn’t before. I’ve been thinking bout that in reference to a recent heartbreak and it’s v comforting. I’m sick as shit and my hair is being held up with an arm band but gosh does my soul feel so light ~Oswald

hey im putting all ur asks in this series below n then responding just bc it takes up a bit of space but i want them all to b together

To continue off of my last ask, God really did //that// for me huh? Like oof, it was pretty well orchestrated imo. I got kinda complacent and lazy with my life and (mental) health. So wam bam God drops a big old heartbreak (worsened by miscommunication) on my doorstep before taking away my crush’s (and at the time, fp) WiFi so I could only talk to him in school. Which was stressful the 1st week. Yknow how I handled the stress? I went to the gym and exercised at home regularly ~Oswald (1) 

Right, so now that I’m going to the gym two things happen: 1.) I realize that I need to make sure I eat enough so I have energy to compete with myself. 2.) I start seeing one of my old friends on a regular basis bc we exercise at the same times. It’s great bc he knows how to properly navigate a gym and stuff! So now I’ve built a habit of exercising regularly as well as trying to eat on a daily basis which is absolutely great!! ~Oswald (2)

But if I want to make sure I eat regularly I need to do smth about my depression and also re-establish my eating times. So I ended up finding content on tumblr that made me feel better while I sipped on chocolate. Eventually I started watching yt vids (mainly gaming vids which usually get released around noon &3pm) while eating a small lunch. So I’m still working on it but I’m slowly building up an eating habit (this morning I had breakfast! ) !! ~Oswald (3)

So now that I’ve been watching a bunch of yt vids I got sucked back into more educational channels (like Vsauce oof) so I’ve been actually paying more attention to what I’m watching and I honestly love learning so much, so that’s really helped with making me feel better overall. I’ve also started reading articles hopefully I’ll start reading books again soon!! ~Oswald (4) 

I’ve been waking up around 2-3am for a while now. So I’ve learnt to waste time bc I don’t like doing things so early in the morning. Anyhow, out of a burning need to do something, anything fulfilling, I’ve started drawing in the morning and….wait for it….. writing in my prayer journal! I feel like that is just the glue that’s gonna hold everything together for me? Idk it’s relaxing as heck and I just, ive been feeling really light bc of them (prayer and art) ~Oswald (5)

I’ve been feeling a lot better about myself recently. Certainly not as amazing as I could be but I’m getting there! “Cyclical but progressing” is smth I’ve been saying a lot bc Ik that this good run I’m having rn will come to an end. But the hope is that when things get bad they won’t be as bad as/I’ll be able to handle it better than last time. Also that I’ll be happier for longer next time around. ~Oswald (6)

To think it took one painful thing at the beginning of this month, coupled with some God orchestrated coincidences, to bring me to where I am now is just a big old wow for me!! Gosh I’m so!!!!!! ~Oswald (7) [hopefully all my messages sent. Hopefully this one sends of nothing else]

-------------------------------------------------------

hey i know this is ridiculously late but i didn’t want to jus delete this ask bc im rlly rlly proud of u for growing and. allowing urself to come back stronger int he face of adversity u have a rlly good mindset and. ur rlly rlly strong ur gna do so many amazing things n get so much better !!!!! motivation and passion and consistent Drive is smthn i rlly need to work on and ur an inspiration tbh thank you for having faith in urself and what u could be