#to take all their pain and pull it through thor's

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

Someone New 7

No tag lists. Do not send asks or DMs about updates. Review my pinned post for guidelines, masterlist, etc.

Warnings: this fic will include angst, pining, romcom tropes, and some darker elements later in the series. Some triggers may not be specifically tagged. My warnings are not exhaustive, enter at your own risk.

This fic will contain explicit content. 18+ only. Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you.

Summary: You’ve had a crush on your best friend for years, but you’re slapped in the face with reality when he takes things to the next level with his girlfriend.

Characters: Steve Rogers, Thor

Note: I am queuing this so who knows if Im still suffering.

As per usual, I humbly request your thoughts! Reblogs are always appreciated and welcomed, not only do I see them easier but it lets other people see my work. I will do my best to answer all I can. I’m trying to get better at keeping up so thanks everyone for staying with me.

Your feedback will help in this and future works (and WiPs, I haven’t forgotten those!) Please do not just put ‘more’. I will block you.

I love you all immensely. Take care. 💖

The morning is going splendid. You spilled your coffee and the tea you packed in a thermos, you left on your counter. The realisation doesn’t hit you until you pull up to the site. You huff and hang your head, gripping the steering wheel as you brace yourself for your caffeine withdrawal. 

At least it’s dry. Mostly. As Thor forecast, the rain didn’t come until the night. The steady patter kept you awake, along with that lingering displacement that never quite leaves you. Fatigue is another constant. Your new normal; sleepless nights and sleepy days. 

You get out and set to work. It’s all you can do. It’s all you’ve been doing. Just keep going. It doesn’t matter how, just get it done, get through the day. 

You yawn at your task, brushing digging, oh so gently wiggling the little form. It’s almost out. Almost free. In your eagerness for some progress, you get careless. Your hand slips and the spearhead grazes our palm. Is isn’t until the stinging splits your skin that you realise it’s a slash. 

Damn it, you didn’t put your damned gloves on. 

Great, with the luck you’re having, you’ve just contracted some ancient virus. You hiss and grip your wrist. Your adrenaline triggers your heart. You take a few breaths to stay calm as you watch the blood bead to the surface. 

You curse and stagger to your feet. You grab the rag from your back pocket and clutch it in your injured hand. You grip it tight as you cross the site, careful not to tread to heavily, and you angle the fencing to sidle between two panels.  

You clumsily pull open the car door and reach under the seat. You always keep an emergency with you. It’s a rule of thumb for your sort of work. You never know what might happen. Bug spray, sunscreen, bandages, swabs, a hole trove of supplies. 

You shake as the pain intensifies, thrumming through your palm. You come out and rest the plastic tote on the hood and sift through with your single hand. This is going to be awkward as hell. While you enjoy your solitary, it can sometimes be unsettling. What if something worse happened? 

“Ruff, ruff, rrrrruffffff,” the growlish yet high-pitched barking comes from up the mountain road. 

You pause as he peek under the rag and peer up as gravel mulches. Another visit? Your work is so boring, you wouldn’t expect him again. Thor appears as Thunder hops before him, spastic as she sniffs the ground in circles. He smiles and waves but you can only manage a grimace before you look back to your wound. 

“Morning,” he booms as he scoops up the small dog and nears the other side of the car, “it’ll be a sunny one.” 

“You sure?” You look up at the greyish blue skies, than at him. Hm, the hue of above is rather similar to his eyes.  

“I know so,” he assures you and tilts his head curiously, “why are you so grim?” 

You show him your hand as you lift the cloth from it. He lets out a sympathetic hum and sets Thunder on the ground. She runs over to inspect the fence as he rounds the hood towards you. As he gets closer, his size is even more obvious. He’s well-built, you can see it even at a distance, but up close and personal, he’s almost inhuman in stature. 

“Yikes,” he offers his hand, “may I?” 

“Really, it’s not—I can handle it.” 

“I’m certain you can. Only the bravest woman would come to these grey lands and sit alone in the dirt,” he jokes. “Please, it’ll be easier with two hands.” 

You relent, a tinge of embarrassment hot in your cheeks, and peel the rag away. You hold your hand out to him and he brings one of his large ones to cradle it. Wow. He’s massive. The difference in your hands is startling. 

“Nasty cut,” he muses as he reaches over for the swabs you’ve piled out on the metal, “but it shouldn’t need more than a snug wrap.” 

“Thanks,” you look away, eyeing the dirt as his proximity makes you squirm.  

You can’t remember the last time a man touched you, especially a handsome one. Well, aside from Sam and Bucky but those were just hugs and usually ended in them arguing anyway. You’ve never been the most popular girl in the world and those men you managed to reel in didn’t stay on the hook very long. You never really tried to keep them. You were always too distracted. 

You wince as he wipes the cut with the alcoholic cloth. He softens his touch but holds your hand firm from beneath. He offers a rumbling apology as he focuses on tending to you. His intent is new to you. The way he looks at your palm holds more than any look you’ve ever gotten from a man. Or anyone. 

He crumples up the used wipe and takes another. He’s thorough. You feel a shiver roll through you despite the warmth in the air. He trades the wipe for the roll of gauze and wraps the strip around your hand, hooking over your thumb and looping your wrist. He uses the little metal clip to pin it then turns your hand over, brushing his own over it as he grins. 

“Good as new,” he announces, “though I recommend you not use it too much. And perhaps a pair of gloves.” 

“Yeah, I forgot. Long day.” 

“It’s nine in the morning?” He chuckles. 

“Yep,” you agree dryly. 

“Hopefully it gets better,” he says. 

“Yeah, maybe,” you agree dully and toss the things back in the tote.  

He picks it up before you can and keeps it from your reach, “like I said, you should take it easy.” 

“Well, there’s work to be done,” you say as he moves to the open door and slides the tote inside. “What are you doing back here?” 

“Ah, I let the queen lead the way,” he stands straight and closes the car door. He looks past you and your head perks up. Thunder is very quiet. “As ever, she does not tread with caution.” 

You turn to find the chihuahua inside the fence. You jump in place and sprint over, clattering between the panels as you call after her. “No, no, sweetie, be careful!” 

You chase her around where you were digging as you sense Thor watching from without. Great! You hope she didn’t pee anywhere. 

A sharp whistle pierces the air and Thunder stops. She sits in place, still wiggling, but doesn’t move. You peek back at Thor and he nods. You near her and pick her up. 

“Sorry about her, she is a free spirit,” he tuts as you cross back to him. “I will be certain she does not stray again. My apologies.” 

You’re taken aback by his sincerity. You try to remember the last time someone apologised to you and sounded like they meant it. Hell, when’s the last time you even got an apology. You dip out between the grating and hold out the dog. 

“I would hate to get in your way any more than we already have,” he hugs her with one arm and spreads his other hand over his chest, “we will be on our way. I do hope the sunshine brings some brightness to your day.” 

“Um, thanks,” you shift on your feet and hide your twiddling fingers. “You too.” 

“I’ve already found my sunlight,” he grins even wider and blinks, “now, Thunder, let’s go make a storm somewhere else.” He twists on his heel and lumbers off, “perhaps mother might put up with you for a time.” 

You stand just outside the fence and watch him go. A lock of his golden hair hangs loosely form his bun, dangling down his back, wagging almost like the dog’s little tail. He bounds over the lumpy ground and disappears behind the rock face. You look down and smile. 

Not everything is so bad and you can see the amber ribbon limning the clouds. The sun will be there soon. Just like he promised. 

💟

Thor comes back again. 

It’s a week since you cut your hand. Like before, you can’t predict him. You don’t hear him approach as he’s alone. You only notice him as he clangs something on the fence and lets out an ‘oops’. You pop your head up and look over at him through squinting eyes. Your forehead hurts from the expression. 

You smooth out your face and stand, facing him. He wiggles a metal canister in his hand. The wind sweeps the strands around his square jaw as the sky pulses in shades of gray behind him. 

“Thought you might like some hot tea,” he holds up the thermos. 

“Oh, uh... you didn’t have to...” you look at the sky and its quivering blanket. You’ve been pondering packing up for the last hour. “Thanks.” 

“Not to worry, I was restless.” 

“And you always go walking through the mountains when you’re bored?” You wonder as you step around the markers in the dirt. 

“I live here, there isn’t very much else to do and it isn’t a good day for swimming.” 

“Swimming?” You nod and click your tongue. “Sounds like the life to me.” 

“Mm, it can be rather languid when there isn’t work to do,” he turns the thermos in his hands as he talks, “Have you tried cloudberry?” 

“Cloudberry? Never heard of it.” 

He pokes the thermos between the panels and you take it. He pushes the barrier back into place between you, hooking his fingers into the links. You feel the warmth through the copper-coloured metal. 

“You didn’t have to come all this way for tea,” you laugh. 

“I wanted to ask after your hand. See how it’s healing,” he says. 

“Oh, uh,” you open and close your gloved hand, “just a scab now. I’m all good.” 

He smiles and keeps himself from leaning to heavily as the fence dips towards you. He coughs and realigns his feet, brushing back the looses strands around his face with a flick. He pushes his shoulders back and drops his hand. 

“So uh, you should try the tea. I put together the herbs myself, steeped it...” he bounces on his heels, “I suppose it’s not that impressive but it is good. Antioxidants, anti-inflammatory.” 

“Wow, sounds like one of those superfoods,” you scoffs as you pull of your glove and tuck it into your work belt. You untwist the cap and steam wisps out. You smell the tea and blow over it. You look up and find him watching you. “You’re starting to make me nervous, what’s in it?” 

“Just tea,” he assures. “I can’t lie to you, though. It wasn’t my idea. My mother suggested it. She’s very interested to see what you’re digging up but I’m afraid she can’t do much at the moment.” 

“Oh, your mother? Is she sick?” 

“She is in perfect health aside from her dislocated knee. She went rock climbing and well, accidents happen, eh?” 

“Yeah, sure do,” you show him your cut. “But they get better.” 

A lull rises as you take a dainty sip. The tartness tweaks your cheeks and you scrunch up your nose. 

“You don’t like it?” 

“It’s... different but not bad,” you say. “So, your parents live up here too?” 

“Mm, yes. I’m afraid I’m occupying their attic at the moment. I sold my home in Oslo, it was much too... cold.” 

You can’t help but snort, “it’s Norway.” 

“Ah, so it is. I should be used to it,” he agrees. “And how are you faring here? Have you adjusted to these dour lands?” 

“Eh, I’m trying,” you put the lid back on and turn it until tight. “Thanks for the tea.” 

“My pleasure,” he assures you. “Seems lonely work.” 

“I don’t mind it,” you shrug and cross your arms, tucking the thermos beneath one arm. 

“Interesting though. Have you found very much?” 

“Ugh, a spearhead and some pieces of the shaft. A vase, cracked though. Some beads.” 

“Beads,” he echoes thoughtfully, “is this all confidential?” 

“Not really, you wanna see?” 

“Very much so,” he says. 

“Right, uh, let me just...” 

You go back to where you were sat and plant the thermos in the dirt. You scurry around, overly aware of his observation, and go to the pin of your catalogued items. You find the bone beads and brings the little dish of them over to the fence. You hold them up as he peers between the links. 

“They have runes,” he intones. 

“Yeah, I’ve got the meaning of all of them except, er...” you pull out the single bead made of jade, “this one.” 

He hums and considers it closely, leaning in. 

“Not a rune. That’s a family symbol.” 

“Oh?” 

“My family’s.” 

“Wow, uh,” you lower your chin, “that’s... I... kinda feel like a thief.” 

“Can’t have cared very much about it if it’s down there,” he remarks, “you know, my father has mapped out much of our genealogy. As much as he can. He might be able to assist with your research, if he can find the time. Bit of a hermit these days.” 

“Oh, uh maybe, I’d hate to bother,” you smile sheepishly, “erm...” you look around, “where’s Thunder? Awful quiet without her.” 

“She’s keeping mother company. I’ve told her not to be too much of an imp, can’t have her making it worse,” he shakes his head. “The two of them are both stubborn as the other.” 

You can’t help the twitch in your eye. All this talk of your family has you suddenly homesick. You fight not to crack and swallow tightly. 

“Anyway, thanks again for the tea.” 

“Your parents must miss you,” he says abruptly. 

“Erm, yeah, my mom calls now and then but she’s better as an empty nester. Dad’s got his head under a hood most days so...” 

“Friends? Boyfriend?” He wonders. 

You arch a brow. He’s not very subtle and yet his inquiry can’t be anything but innocent, right? You’re still strangers. He can’t be into you. Not someone who looks like him. How long did you pray for Steve to even see you like that? This man is definitely not going to. 

“Friends. Sam likes to pester me when I should be sleeping and Bucky... they’re funny.” You sniff and gaze past him. You won’t mention that giant elephant in your head. The one you think about at night. 

“Lots to miss back home, it sounds like,” he breaks the silence before it can settle. 

“Yeah, but not every day you get to travel.” 

“And to a beautiful land,” Thor declares, “I hope one day you’ll come out of the dirt and see more of it. You’ll be surprised what lays further up the mountain.” 

You smile and look down, “yeah, maybe one day.” 

“Until then,” he backs up on his heel, “I won’t distract you any further. Enjoy your tea.” He turns and strides away, pausing halfway as you linger by the fence, “the rain will be here around five so I would leave early, otherwise you’ll be driving through it.” 

“Right,” your chest deflates just a little. You don’t know what you wanted him to say but you’re disappointed, “thanks.” 

[mx-pastelwriting]

GOW HC - Having a baby with them

God of War x GN! Reader

Summary: Having a baby with them.

Warnings: Fluff, Established Relationship, Pregnancy, Tears. Lost of them.

Characters: Kratos, Thor, Freyr, Heimdall

A/N: All canon kids exist.

Kratos

- Being some years after Atreus leaves, finding love again with you. It didn’t take long until you fell pregnant, as his pull-out game is a little weak, especially after such a long time since he’s participated in the ritual.

- A bit shocked to learn the news after days of taking care of you while feeling helpless waiting for Freya to come back to Midgard. Though after the news and Freya's leaving, he’s all smiles and laughs—none that you've ever seen or heard before—filled with happiness at the chance to start a family once again and for Atreus to have a sibling. Sending him a message a day after the news while you took a nap.

- Very lovey-dovey during the pregnancy, coming more out of his hard spartan shell as you started to show more. Always placing a hand on your stomach, not caring if there wasn't anything to show yet. Insists on doing everything, not with words, of course—doing the cooking, cleaning, even making the bed—he does it all. Resting one evening with a hand on your belly, feeling them kick, jumping at the feeling at first, only realizing the little one was fighting against his heavy hand.

- Rubbing your belly every minute of every day while speaking to them in his Greek tongue, wanting them to hear his voice clearly, not knowing Norse very well. Sometimes his talking catches your attention, thinking it was for you, but as soon as he kneels, you know who they were for.

- Keeping Freya on standby as the time got closer, going hunting less, but bringing back more food every time, knowing he’d have to stay with you after the birth. When going into labor, he stays calm, holding you, kissing your skin softly as encouragement and comfort through the pain. Taking every painful squeeze of the hand, wiping away every drop of sweat that came from your forehead.

- Finally hearing the screams of your new baby coming into the world, he cries silently, holding the little bundle in his arms. With you calming down from the pain, he dared not take his amber eyes off of them. Days passed, waking from naps to hear him softly talking to the baby, watching as he around the clock cared for them, not caring about the toll it had on him. 

Waking only minutes ago, seeing Kartos’s tired state after having fed and rocked the baby for their nap, finally putting down the bundle of joy. Calling for your husband to get his slow attention, reaching out a hand, he takes it, letting you pull him into the bed. 

Taking the hulking god into your arms, letting him rest on your pillow, watching as sleep swiftly takes him. Only seconds after the uncomfortable whines of the baby started making him shoot out of sleep, quickly pushing him down promising to take care of them, did he rest after three days of no sleep.

-

Thor

- It wouldn’t have taken long at all, as the man's drive is high, but if you were careful, it would take a year or two. The pull-out game isn’t that strong, but if you don’t say anything during the act or before, he won’t pull out.

- All laughs when finding out it was only a matter of time; also thankful that you weren’t sick, just pregnant. Tells everyone when you’re okay with it, shows you off proudly as he’s going to become a father again.

- Clingy, so clingy since finding out. Staying in bed longer to cuddle, rubbing your belly, not caring if nothing was showing yet. Would stop drinking during the pregnancy; though hard, he would do it for you, keeping away from Odin as much as he could. Even asking Baldur to take some of his jobs. Feeling them kick for the first time, he would only smile, commenting on their strength or their trying to reach for Mjölnir, causing you both to laugh.

- Laying next to your stomach at night, talking to them endlessly, only stopping as he fell asleep from you playing with his long hair. Would allow you to use him like a body pillow, any position needed at night, he makes it happen. 

- When going off to a job, he has one of his oldest to watch you, mostly Magni, but Modi tags along if you want to go out to walk around the lands of Asgard. Though Heimdall is rarely asked, when Thor knows the job will be a long one, he asks. Surprisingly, Heimdall is more talkative about the new child of Thor than their siblings. 

- As you got bigger, his fights with Odin would ramp up, wanting to stay closer in case you go into labor, not even bothering to leave your shared chamber, keeping close with you as you'd been put on bed rest as growing a half-god, half-giant wasn't easy. Finally, as the time came, it went by quickly as a flash, with every medic in Asgard being there to help while Thor held your hand with tears streaming down his face.

- The first few days would be filled with tears and naps—you having the naps, of course. Thor, knowing what to do already, growing a routine with the little one as you healed from the birth. When healed, he insists on showing the little one around Asgard, knowing it was an excuse to show them off to everyone, but you agree. Seeing how he dressed them up cutely before showing them off to the family. 

Watching as the sleeping baby's feet bounced fitted with the cutest booties, Thor walked with the little one cradled against his chest with a soft cloth. Entering the front room, everyone's eyes watching as they started to gush over the little bundle.

Some were too afraid to get too close to Thor, and the other gods that cooed watched from behind the small crowd, looking around the room meeting a familiar pair of purple eyes. Quickly, they looked away, acting as if he was never interested in the new addition, knowing he'd be around later when Thor was away to meet the little one.

-

Freyr

- Three words. God of Fertility. This man has no pull-out game. Though if you were cautious enough, you would be spared for some time, but the man has a high drive, so good luck if you were planning on not having one right away.

- Thinks it's a joke at first since you both always poke funny at each other lightly, once in passing about him being the god of fertility. When it hits him, tears start. After many years of chasing people that he had feelings for over and over, the dream of having a family of his own finally came true, thanks to you.

- Though he loved the realms, the love he has for you is greater, meaning traveling to them would stop wanting to take care of you. However, you both go one last time to Alfheim, taking it slow in your early stages of pregnancy, going to the temple, bringing together both dark and light elves asking for their blessing on your growing child.

- As you get bigger, so does Freyr get even softer, lying next to you at the end of the day, at first noticing how antsy he is since going cold turkey on traveling. Until you give him the idea of reliving the travels through stories, happily doing so to the audience of you and the little one. Cuddling atop your belly as the little one kicked against his cheek, causing Freyr to shoot up, slow to figure out what the feeling was. Then, realizing with big eyes, it all ending in him playfully scolding the child, only getting a rebellious kick in return.

- Would start to get a hair-pulling amount of stress as you struggled in the late stages of pregnancy, Freyr having to do most things around the house just to keep you from getting up out of bed. Having Freya, of course, to help in the birth, though months before he had asked where you wished for it to happen in any river or realm, he would be happy to fulfill the dream as you did with his.

- Surprised at how tiring parenting is, barely getting to see his nephew grow up, the man is clueless about all of it. Fortunately, thanks to Freya, you both wouldn't be totally in the dark. Still, Freyr made the experience of parenthood even more memorable. From putting the baby's diaper on wrong to overfeeding for the reason of them being so cute,.

Waking to the noise of a familiar voice cooing, looking over to Freyr's side, not seeing his head on the pillow but glancing down, seeing him cuddled against your stomach. Kissing away at your stretched skin, loving as the baby kicks back at his papa's kind words and kisses. 

Noticing your awoken eyes on him, looking up meeting his pretty brown eyes, hoping they'd share them—if not this one, then next—knowing he'd say yes to that request.

-

Heimdall

- Heimdall has a good amount of self-control, so his pull-out game is nothing to laugh at. Meaning you would have to beg for a baby, but even then, he wouldn't want one not understanding them or the want for them.

- Quiet at first with the realization that it was all becoming real; the thought of a child and caring for one being only nine months away scared him. A change in him happens when hearing the news, growing a new sense of protection for the both of you, no longer seeking out fights to fill his ego. Slowly leaving Odin's side trading it for yours. For once, doubt crept up about his abilities—not in combat, but in him being a father.

- Every day watching you grow panic built within him bad enough to where it was visible, having to question his wellness a few times before finally breaking down letting all of his doubts spill, leaving you to put everything back together. Reassuring you'd get through it together, mistakes were inevitable, but learning to fix them is what matters.

- Isn't going to be very cuddling or a show-off in public, choosing to keep close instead, whether around the corner or from afar on the wall. When he's at home, it's all cuddles, cradling your bump, reading aloud to the both of you. Doesn't talk much to them, only states things as if teaching them through your stomach wall. Relaxing on nights, a hand to your stomach, getting the urge to move his hand away, only realizing why as the feeling of a kick caused him to gasp aloud.

- Grows eager to leave his watches early as you progress into the late stages, wanting to be there if anything were to happen. Finding his heart always racing when looking at your belly in silence, it bothered him still, being the only thing he couldn't predict. If your mobility was stunted from the pregnancy, he would go so far as to ask Baldur to take day watches, with Heimdall taking nights.

- Going into labor, Heimdall would be soft yet snappy, making sure no one was to make any mistakes. Taking every one of your screams and painful hand squeezes, soothing you with words of encouragement and promises for the future. Finally, hearing a different cry fill the room, tears run down his face, trying but failing to hide them. 

- Becomes such a cautious dad, not allowing his other family to see them until a month goes by, not wanting them to get sick. Wears a baby sling around the house while cooking, cleaning, reading to them as you heal from the birth. Showing Odin what a good father is, but when having to go back to patrols, his heart breaks, crying as he gives you the little one in the mornings before going off.

Tears threaten to spill from Heimdall's eyes while handing over your child, no longer allowed to spend days and nights with the baby. Now having to go back to his work for Asgard even with your reassurance, his pride was no longer with Asgard but with you and the new addition to your family.

Giving them a final shower of kisses before giving one to you, stepping back, taking in the sight before going off to his first day back. Sighing as the door finally closes, taking the baby only a few steps away before the door bursts open with a crying Heimdall wanting his baby back. (The man would definitely have the baby in the sling while patrolling the wall.)

-

Hello, I hope you enjoyed if there is any grammar mistakes or misspellings sorry about that feel free to let me know in the comments, have a great day/afternoon/night!

𝙏𝙖𝙜𝙡𝙞𝙨𝙩: @fullmoonwolfer1 @loki-love

♥ mx-pastelwriting does not consent to their work being copied, translated, or reposted on any other platform without permission.

[shinjisdone]

𝑇𝜎 𝑆𝜎𝑓𝜏𝜀𝜋 𝛼 𝑊𝛼𝑟𝑟𝜄𝜎𝑟’𝑠 𝐻𝜀𝛼𝑟𝜏 (Vinland Saga; Thorfinn - 𝑺𝒍𝒂𝒗𝒆 𝑨𝒓𝒄, 𝑷𝒂𝒓𝒕 𝟏)

In which you have joined Askeladd’s band…and grow closer to the Son of Thors - though as your future seemed promising, his thirst for revenge devastated all that you had left.

[Headcanons of how it would be like to meet Thorfinn again after he shattered your heart (based on season 2; both platonic and romantic)

Sᴇᴀsᴏɴ ₁ ﹙Wᴀʀ Aʀᴄ﹚ is here

Part 2: - (Thorfinn trying to accept your existence as a slave)

Part 3: - (Thorfinn finding a reason to live, you finally see him)

Tag list:

@luopenis , @jinsecho , @mitsureigen , @theknightssecrets , @lana-del-stan , @theghostofanficpresent

[Mentions of murder, death, war, slave trade, harrasment against women and whatever awful things happened in the viking era. Slavery will be a main subject throughout the entire arc. Mostly gender-neutral examples but female-leaning ones are there, too.]

[This part will specifically mention: Nightmares, detailed gore and killing, slavery, humiliation, hallucinations, slight romanticization of death/wishing someone to be dead, slight panic]

Time And Time Again, My Hopes Are Gone...

Far west, across the sea is a land. Rich of fertile ground and warm all year round. He can see the stillness of the meadow as the wind softly blows through the trees.

The wilderness is untouched. Far away from slave traders and the flames of war. The sun is benign with its rays that gently fall on his skin. It's warm and quiet. A gale so soft it embraces his throbbing pain.

Far to the west, across the rich and green hill, is a figure drawing closer. Colors clashing with the soft sky and land, washed out compared to the world around him. Nevertheless, he feels his heart picking up on speed and appraoches the figure with painstakingly slow steps.

The colors and the gear are still the same. Old and bented, abused and dull and so was the glare in their eyes. He should not feel a thing here, knowing this gaze all too well, but it still festered fear inside his heart when it is directed at him. The clear blue sky grows red and the sun fled.

Still, somehow he was able to crack a strained, faltering smile. "...What are you doing here?" He needed to take a deep breath, "You still look the same...like yesterd-"

"What the hell are you talking about, dog?"

The feigning smile was wiped off his face in an instant as his eyes widened. He could feel his muscles aching again, his stomach grumbling, his heart shattering.

You looked at him with such distain in your eyes.

It's Like A Never-Ending Marathon...

"How can you even act like this? Does all of this mean nothing to you?"

His breath hitched in his throat, burning hot and sickening as the quietness of the world was cut down by the incoming roars emerging from the scenery behind you. Pumping up their spears and axes, they tainted the meadow red as small figures galloped across the sky. The fires were following closely after them.

"You left...left me, and left this massacre behind you as you trailed over the sea."

Chants of victories rung in his ears as the flames consumed the both of you. The herd of men loud and clear but always seemed too far to touch and reach. There you still stood, your glare as dark as thunder and never-changing.

"Coward. Deranged mutt. Calling yourself a warrior."

Jaw agape, he watched with white, bulging eyes the scene behind you. It was all too familiar that it should have kick in an instinct - but all he could feel was terror.

With a swift pull to your back, you drew the blade out before plunging it with a sprint down to his abdomen. He barely could let out a scream. Instead, wide agape, he looked down with darting eyes to see his father's dagger.

A crooked grin decorated your visage as you twisted the dagger, cut further, deeper horizontally before yanking it out. Blood tainted your skin.

He could feel himself fall. Fall longer, deeper, faster, down, down, down, and down before a scream pulled him out.

I Hear Voices Every Night Of The Ones I Left Behind...

The same quietness he dreamed about surrounds him in the hut. No, a barn it was. It didn't have a door and he constantly reeked of hay and manure.

Right - this was the barn on the farm.

Sluggishly, he got up as pieces of hay fell off his worn out tunic. With a slow and steady gate his legs carried him to the well standing still and cold in the early morning, the sun having risen just a moment ago as well. He reached out with rough and calloused hands to the cold water and splashed it on his face. Always three times at least as the master told him. With each splash, his mind and vision got clearer and finally, he breathed freely.

What a strange nightmare. This hollow feeling expanding in his heart remained even in the waking world but he cannot recall from what.

As the sun rose higher, he made his way over the dirty, sandy road. Not a lot of the others were up and about as he was, though he only paid attention to the forest further away. The tired mutters of greetings flew over him, like a leaf in the cold wind. All he needed was the axe.

The axe cuts. It hits the sturdy trunk, chopping it away bit by bit, splinters of wood occasionally digging into his skin. Though it was as thick as the trees themselves, so no one ever heard a complaint from him.

The axe cuts. No tree shrieks in pain nor does anyone raise a brow at the lone man in the forest letting one tree fall after another. It keeps him awake and his muscles at work.

The axe cuts. The trees die and fall like flies, slowly - as it is with tree felling, he was told - down to every last twig and root it bears. Nothing can be left behind as the master wished it. All needs to be cleaned off the land so he can use it. So he cut and cut and cut.

"Thorfinn!"

Thorfinn halted. Stopped in his tracks as he was told and looked up through lidded, droopy, brown eyes. In the distance he saw a hand waving as the master galloped closer and with him, a younger slave.

Getting off the mount, he steadied his fall. Master Ketil was an older and seasoned farmer. His blonde hair growing thinner, broad but kind face decorated with wrinkles and his wealth showing in his round stomach. Once again, as he often does, he approached Thorfinn with a smile. "You will be getting a friend." Then he pointed behind him and the youngling followed hastily to bow. "This is Einar and he will be helping you starting tomorrow to fell the trees and turn it into fertile farm land. Einar, Thorfinn has been doing this for a bit longer than a year, he will show you around."

Brown eyes followed the man's gesture and fell on the younger one with kempt, auburn hair. Face young and with no stubbles, a small wart at the side of his nose - finished with an nervous and perplexed expression.

His own looked deep into the one of his new companion and found nothing but vapidness in them.

"Oh, uhm...it's nice to meet you." Einar tried to crack a smile. Thorfinn did not.

With a small chuckle of his own, Ketil pointed towards the small forest, talking of an subject Thorfinn had heard of time and time again.

Talks of fertile land, of wheat, of buying and selling, surpassing ones own price and freedom.

Freedom.

Did he have any of that ever in the first place? He doubted it.

But the new guy had a different opinion of it.

"Buying ourselves back?!" Einar stuttered, not believing what the farmer had just uttered, "We can get our freedom back if we just plant and sell the wheat to you?!"

Ketil jumped and blinked in surprise. "Why...yes. Does that not sound like a good deal to you?" "It's not that! N-Not at all! Thank you, thank you so much! I'll gratefully take the offer!"

Without another word, Einar sprinted deeper into the forest. Sighing heavily, Ketil settled back on his mount, ready to go back. "Do show him around for today Thorfinn and don't have him slack off after that. Both of you have a lot of work to do."

The blonde looked back at him with lidded eyes.

"Yes, master."

Dragging himself after the brunette, the young man watched him observe the area in awe. Trees loomed over the two and Einar swiftly turned back to the shorter man, his jaw agape.

"Thorfinn, was it?! Is that something you can do here in Denmark?! You - You can buy yourself out of slavery?!"

That I Love...

In the midmorning, Einar couldn't sit still.

Strenuously, he mimicked Thorfinn's day-to-day work. Inspecting each tree and root, yanking on them with his bare hands in hopes it might detach just a bit, and throwing questions.

Thorfinn found his keenness perplexing.

At noon, Einar awaited food.

Hearing about the service of the helpers, paid guests helping and guarding Ketil's farm, he grew ever so keen again. The helpers were not the kindest folk and seemingly the most hungry as well.

"What is there to complain?" One sneered as he appraoched Einar. The latter showed the crumbles and nibbled cheese in his rough hands instead. "This, this is our food? How is this supposed to be enough for two people? And it was obviously gnawed on!"

"So?" The second man of the trio sauntered closer with a wide grin. "Slaves like you should be grateful you can even eat a day. For someone so small and little, you sure talk big. We helpers wake up each and every day to bring food to lowly rats like you! And none of you even have the brains on how to thank someone for it!"

With a shaking gasp, Einar stepped back. The mere tone. The way the spit splashed on his face as he talks with that knowing glint in his dull eyes.

How could someone be like that? Just a year ago, he was surrounded by normal people, a village and family.

Once again, the helper spits as he scoffed. "Say it, dog," The grin grew ever so crooked as Einar's shock quickly transformed into rage. "Say 'thank you for the food'."

Breath hitched as the brunette took everything within him not to batter the man here and there. Balling a fist, he pulled back - before a smaller figure squeezed himself between the men and held out the crumbs of bread in his hands.

Thorfinn avoided the helper's gaze and looked down, as if giving a woeful prayer. "We thank you for the food."

Einar observed the tension dissolving, face that of an fish out of water, as Thorfinn returned to his work as if nothing happened.

In the afternoon, Einar hauled a sack of hay on his shoulder, heart feeling disarrayed.

Up ahead he followed Thorfinn who carried two sacks on his shoulders. He wondered how he does it despite his shorter and hunched form.

In fact, the blonde always seemed to hunch so far. He wondered how he does the entire labourous work in the first place.

"...How can you do all of this so easily? And with an empty stomach, too, day in and out. Chopping off the trees and then hauling them off the ground...like that old donkey was of any help." He pouted at the memory of the helpers bringing in an old, weak horse as 'aid' while they snoozed under the trees, "And you were so obedient to these jerks, too."

The walk continued to be quiet. The brunette continued to pout, making an even longer face at the one-sided conversation.

"You know, you can report that to the master! No, we should, have to do that! We are his property and these jerks treated us like were are lesser than that! He should know how his slaves are being treated and get rid of these pigs!"

The walk was silent after that as well. Thorfinn did not turn his back away neither show any sign of taking in his words. Einar only pouted even more and bit his tongue - momentarily.

"You're really strange."

As if struck by lightning, the blonde stopped. A force jolted through his muscles and bones that almost threatened to have him let go of the hay. The same force took a hold of his heart, like a fist squeezing it so tight with the intent to kill him. It won't let go.

Calming down from the start, Einar sped up in front of him with raised brows. The blonde's face was frozen in fear.

"...Thorfinn...?"

"What did you just say?"

"Uh," Quickly, he stepped back. Even the way Thorfinn managed to utter the question, jaw agape and frozen as well, perplexed him. "I said you're strange. Like, it's not like I dislike you it's just…just that I thought we could talk more. You're so quiet all the time but then get so obedient around these jerks but then act like you don't care-"

Agonizingly slow does he regain his body. With each word Einar spoke, Thorfinn nodded along, listened and had it ring in his head like a chant. Just as slow, he began walking again. "...I really am, aren't I?" He muttered after taking a deep breath.

"Eh, uhm, what?"

"Strange..."

I'm Trying To Find The Place Where I Belong...

Thorfinn was allowed to call it a day early for teaching Einar.

Today's chores were almost completed anyway with how tenacious his new companion had been. It was an insistence he could not comprehend.

The brunette did not expect much when Thorfinn showed him the way to the small barn, pointing to the heaps of hay and buckets at the corners. The master's house was across the road at least and the well free for him to use.

Einar also expected not much from his peer, as he had learned today when he quickly dozed off. He believed him to be anyway, when he stayed silent through all his questions.

Einar was strange...but the blonde reckoned he was, too.

That night, his visions turned into nightmares once again - but only to be left forgotten again in the morning.

A dark blue sea and an equally dark sky above. The wrath of the gods over the clouds and a hoard of monsters waging further away. He found himself lucky he wasn't so close.

But that relief was cut short by the freezing pain in his abdomen, as he looked down at you, teeth gritting like a beast. When did he grow taller than you?

He always thought you were the same height. Or were you the taller one?

With a growl, you swayed back with the dagger out of his flesh and thrusted it into it again. Labored breaths tried to escaped your gritted teeth, nosetrils flaring up as you only scolwed at him. With great effort and little strength, you drew the blade back and stabbed him again.

"Liar..." You croaked out, the smallest of hints of tears in your eyes, "This isn't where we're supposed to be. You liar..." Another sob and another attack. Blood oozed out of his open stomach like a broken spring and while the pain was unbearable, Thorfinn remained standing.

"You were supposed to take me somewhere that isn't here!"

He watched with terror as you drowned in his blood.

Einar shot up at the ear-splitting shriek. He wondered how none of the master's family had heard.

All he vividly remembered on his first night on the farm as a slave, was Thorfinn feeling up his abdomen in a mad frenzy, his eyes wide and jaw agape in a silent scream.

Until I Do, I Guess I'll Carry On...

The sun rises and the reek of manure still dwells in his nose. Einar was not dreaming of the farm.

But as he followed Thorfinn's demure figure, anxiously keeping up with his chores and strength, he cannot keep his eyes off of him. Of this strange guy and his hushed whispers in the night.

Again, he observed and stayed back this time as the blonde accepted the spit thrown on his face and food. The amount of labor he carries on his broken back with an lost look in his eyes.

So small and dry, brown so hazy and milky, he wonders if he can even see.

Einar stays back and listens as the master and his employers give him more work, more duties, more praises, more insults. He takes it all the same.

Then, at the setting of the sun, the young man still stays back and watches with the rest of the slaves nearby as Thorfinn dropped all he had carried diligently to the master, and sprinted to a small person further away.

His heart beat in his ears, ringing against his skull and Einar found himself surprised as he prayed that Thorfinn would not get in trouble for whatever he was doing there.

Not getting in trouble for the calloused hand that reached out for that person's shoulder, how they yelped out and whipped their head around at the contact with the man.

How they watched as Thorfinn's hopeful face slowly dimmed to shock - then reverted back to his nonchalant ignorance.

What a fool he was. No, it couldn't be. The words he heard, they weren't yours. This little slave, just a terrified child, may have talked like you - walked like you, had a stature like you, looked like you - but in their place, you wouldn't have frozen on the spot. You would have killed him, or he you, when you gazed upon him as you did time and time again.

Without another word, he let his hand fall to his side and dismissed Einar's concerns. The brunette apologized for Thorfinn's stead but the man was already on his way to the barn.

He didn't even know what he was thinking. How his mind could see a silhouette that could resemble you, mistake you, and start running after you. Thorfinn didn't know what he was doing.

The master was already used to his behaviour. Perhaps that's why he wanted to get rid of him while still gaining a bit of gold.

Another night. Another new slave - a young, blonde woman - another curse from Einar about wars and beasts and another nightmare. It's what Thorfinn finally reckoned them as.

Trapped In Every Sacrifice,

Feel Like I'm Gonna Lose My Mind...

The demons that haunt him as he stabs them down for the earth to swallow. Your bloodied body holding a blade. The insults and spits thrown at him, his insides falling down into the sea. Your flailing arms as you cry for his help as the ground splits in two.

In the dead of the night, he checks for his companion, still seeing him to be asleep. Limply, Thorfinn forced himself to sit up.

The stars were as bright as ever. They were when you two were together but in the past year, the nightsky seemed different. Under it, all alone, he mumbled your name under his breath to remember you by.

That's right, he did not even have anything to remember you by, did he? Not a weapon, not a trinket, nothing. All that was left of you were the nightmares haunting his mind.

He hoped it was even less. In this cool, dark night, Thorfinn hoped you were dead. All would be easier for you to bear if just bones remained of you - and it would be easier to bear for him on his heart and mind.

You'd be free.

No Freedom, Without Love...

Scorching was the sun that morning as Ketil appraoched Thorfinn and Einar on his horse once again. Pater accompanied him with another in tow. Shackles of splinted wood around their swollen wrists. Their head hanging low.

"Thorfinn, Einar!" Ketil called out and began his usual prattling. His face bore that same, kind smile even when his words fell on some deaf ears. All Thorfinn could really focus on were lidded eyes slowly moving from the dirtied path up to him. Eyes that were drooped, limp, cold and familiar.

A shaky gasp. Air that got stuck in their lungs. Ketil halted in surprise as they stepped closer in hesitation, their bound hands rising and Pater yelling out about authority and respect of a property to follow.

All Thorfinn could hear were their breathless gasps, the darting eyes, hollow and in tears as their chafed hands gingerly cradled his face - as if unsure if he was really there.

Then, the shock turned into sorrow and anger.

"...You were supposed to be in Iceland..."

Pater yanked them away from him, the familiar warmth gone as they disorientate. Thorfinn could barely breath.

[vbecker10]

Could I request headcanons (or a little scenario if that's what you'd prefer) for loki befriending the new member of their team that can turn into a huge bear and she's used as their heavy hitter in fights but since a bear's sense of smell and hearing is much more sensitive than humans she has a tendency to get bad sensory overloads even in casual settings and shifting between forms sometimes leaves her in pain and just basically how they would bond over time and help her through her struggles. Thanks!

Help you Bear It

(I'm not proud of this pun but @soubi001 will be lol)

Pairing: Loki x female reader (Y/N)

Summary: As the newest member of the Avengers, you are desperate to prove yourself as a heavy hitter who can keep the others safe. You hide the pain you feel when shifting between your human and bear form during training sessions but while you are on your first mission in the field, Loki knows something is wrong. He tries to support you through your shift back to being human and is curious as to why you fight through the pain when you could just never shift again.

Warnings: fighting, minor injuries, anxiety, some sensory issues, pain when shifting forms, feeling useless, feeling like a monster, abandonment issues - don't worry, Loki is super comforting, fluff at the end

A/N: I'm so so sorry it took me forever to get to this request. I'm finally going through my requests and I thought this idea was super interesting. I sort of ran with it a bit so I hope you don't mind if it's a little different from your ask. Thank you for sending it! I hope you like it! 💚

lille bjørn - little bear in Norwegian (I asked Google so hopefully that's right lol)

You roar loudly, standing tall on your hind legs as Steve spins and throws his shield towards you. Swinging one of your massive claws, you easily swipe it from the air and send it to the ground with a heavy thud. Your attention is pulled from the Captain by the sound of Clint unleashing a series of arrows in your direction. Running on all fours, you avoid being struck as you close the distance between you and Steve.

Without his shield, Steve has little choice but to turn and run from you, hoping one of the others will distract you until he is armed again. Your head turns towards the sound of another series of arrows leaving Clint's bow and you easily change course. Out of the corner of your eye, you see a flash of red and know the God of Thunder has joined the fight. Your attention now shifts to finding Thor, you take a sniff of the cool air and growl when you catch his scent.

Stalking slowly to the tree he is hiding against, you keep one ear open listening to Steve's footsteps through the tall grass. Just as you reach the tree, another arrow zings past you and you stand on your hind legs for a better view of its origin. You finally see the archer, hidden in the thick leaves of a tree several yards away. He is too far for you to do anything at the moment but at least you've located him. Now back to the god and super soldier, you think, your lips curling to show your sharp teeth.

Lightning cracks overhead and the fur around your neck stands up in response, you let out a low growl. The thunder that follows is not enough to hide Steve's approach from behind and you turn to face him. Again, he throws his shield at you with as much force as he can but you swipe it away, embedding it into a nearby tree. With a roar, you charge forward but at the last second, you turn to your left just in time for Thor to land before you, his red cape fluttering around him in the breeze.

He dodges your charge, leaping out of the way but not in time. You reach for him with one of your large claws and pull him back to the ground by his ankle. He swears loudly in Asgardian as you slam him down on his back but before you can continue your attack, you hear Steve pull his shield free from the tree. Three more arrows fired in quick succession soar towards you, you swerve through them and keep your attention fixed on the Captain. Roaring as you run to meet him, he throws his shield for a third time and for a third time you cast it away.

He stands in front of you, ready to continue the fight without any weapons. You growl as your heavy frame collides with him and you send him backwards onto the ground. You rear up, ready to pin the barely conscious Captain America but your ears perk up, alerting you to the electricity in the air. You quickly lower yourself to be on all fours and move away from him just before lightning strikes where you had been. Thor once more lands just behind you, Mjolnir spinning by the leather handle. He charges towards you and you run to meet him.

You rear up on your hind legs, narrowly avoiding being hit by Mjolnir as Thor releases it. Before it can return to him, you throw your weight forward and force him to the ground on his back causing him to miss catching it. It slams through a tree and buried itself into the ground in a hail of splinters. You loom over Thor, your paws pinning him to the dirt as you roar inches from his face.

He looks up at you then yells, "I yield! I yield."

You sit back immediately and the forest around you fades away. Stark white tiles replace the lush grass, the sun brightens into a row of LED lights on the high ceiling and the sound of birds is turned off. You look to your left and watch the rest of the team applaud and cheer your final test through the floor to ceiling glass wall.

Loki cheers the loudest as the replay of you slamming Thor into the ground is shown on a loop on one of the monitors. "That's how it feels!" he says excitedly, getting up from his seat. He laughs to himself and ignores the judgmental looks from Tony and Fury.

You walk over to Steve and nudge him lightly with your nose as he stands slowly. "I yield too," he says with a light laugh, rubbing the back of his head with one hand and the top of your head with his other hand. "Good job, Y/N," he smiles.

You lay down and rest near the rear of the training room, watching the team leave as they talk and laugh with each other. As soon as the door shuts and the room is empty, you close your eyes and with a deep breath you begin to focus on shifting to your human form. The process is extremely painful and you've been told it's hard to watch so you plan on sparing the others from witnessing it for as long as possible.

You lift your head, suddenly feeling as if someone is in the room with you but as your shift progresses, your senses are overwhelmed and hard to control. With a final roar of pain fading into a groan of agony, you kneel on the floor, fully human again and exhausted.

On shaky legs, you walk over to where you left your backpack and sit heavily on the floor, resting your back against the wall. You grab a bottle of water, drinking the whole thing at once then tear open your protein bar. Your ear twitches and you look up, the feeling of being watched returns. You catch a faint green mist settling near the door but you shake your head when you don't see anyone, assuming your simply exhausted and take a bite of your protein bar.

The next morning you sit between Loki and Steve on the jet, heading to your first mission. Your leg bounces nervously and you chew on your lip until Steve taps your shoulder and pulls you from your anxious thoughts.

"Try to relax," he says in a brotherly tone.

You nod but continue to bounce your leg which happens to be resting against Loki's.

"Will you please stop that," he Loki says few minutes later. You instantly stop moving your leg and make eye contact with the God of Mischief.

"Sorry," you mumble and look down quickly. You place your hands on your knees and take a deep breath to try and calm your nerves.

"Thank you," he says calmly as he lowers his eyes back to his book.

"Almost there," Natasha calls over her shoulder from the pilot's seat of the jet.

"Great, thanks Nat," Steve responds as he gets up. "You ready?" he asks, standing over you.

"Mmhmm," you nod. You force yourself to keep your eyes on Steve as you feel Loki's eyes fix on you.

"Are you going to..." Steve waves his hand vaguely at you.

"Shift?" you guess and he nods. "Uh... yea, I mean not right now though," you let out a nervous laugh. "Having a bear on a jet doesn't sound like a great idea right? I'll do it when we land."

"Makes sense," Steve agrees easily with a shrug and leaves you to take the copilot seat next to Natasha.

Loki leans towards you and in a hushed voice says, "Remember to stay calm, lille bjørn. You bested my brother and the captain. You will do well today."

You look up at him but his eyes have returned to his book. "Thanks," you tell him, feeling both stunned by his compliment and a bit more confident. He nods in response and you think you see a faint smile on his lips but he doesn't look up until Steve tells you both you will be landing in five minutes.

"We need to get to the computers they have in basement," Steve says as he catches his shield, spins and sends it flying down the hallway again.

Loki raises his hand and with a green glow, throws three Hydra soldiers into a wall, knocking them unconscious. "Y/N and I can hold them back while you and Widow retrieve the files," Loki offers as he sends two more soldiers flying towards you.

You roar in agreement as you turn your attention to the men Loki sent your way. You pin one to the ground and bite his shoulder before swiping the other across the chest with your claw.

"Sounds like a plan," Natasha says as she follows Steve to the door leading to the stairwell.

Loki creates two duplicates, each armed with daggers to block the path to the door. You turn then rear up on your hind legs and slam a soldier to the ground before he is able to take a shot at Loki.

"Nicely done, lille bjørn," he smiles before a duplicate throws a dagger at another Hydra soldier standing behind you.

Fifteen minutes later, Loki's radio crackles with static and he groans in annoyance as he tries to adjust it with one hand while sending a soldier into a wall with his other hand. "Repeat that captain," he says into the radio.

You lift your head to look towards Loki, your paws resting on the chest of the man pinned under you. More static comes through the radio and Loki looks at you with a shrug, his duplicates vanishing as the hallway seems to be empty. In an instant, you move off the soldier you have on the ground and charge towards Loki.

"What-" he tries to ask as you pass him, grabbing the soldier behind him by the neck and bringing him to the ground. You turn your head to look at Loki over your shoulder and he opens his mouth to speak but the radio crackles again.

"Loki-" Steve's voice can barely be heard over the static. "Run- detonated-"

"We can't understand you," Loki says, you can hear the concern in his voice as you walk towards him on all fours. You lift your head and sniff the air, drawing Loki's attention. "What's wrong Y/N?" he asks even though he's knows you can't answer him.

"You need to leave-" Steve's voice comes through clearer. "They detonated the self-destruction protocol! The stairwell is blocked-" the static returns. "Natasha and I-" he cuts out. "We're almost out but you need to leave!"

Your ears perk as a faint beeping grows steadily louder and you can no longer smell any approaching Hydra soldiers. You nudge Loki hard with your nose and force him to start moving, guiding him back the way you had entered the base. You can hear the count down clock but have no way of letting Loki know how little time is left. He runs next to you, relying on your sense of smell to track the multiple hallways you had followed to lead you this deep into the building.

You suddenly realize there isn't enough time for you to reach the exit, the building is going to come down around you both. You stop short in front of one of the containment labs and Loki nearly runs into you.

"Y/N, what are you doing?" he asks. You stand on your hind legs and push him into the room. He staggers backwards and catches his balance before he falls. "We need to-" you interrupt his words by slamming your paw into the control panel, causing the large metal door to slam shut.

A moment later the building shakes violently and you position yourself over Loki to protect him from falling debris. Alarms blare as the explosion rips through the base and you close your eyes. When you open them again, there is dust in the air and sparks fly from torn cables and wires in the ceiling. You quickly move yourself away from Loki and he looks at you in stunned silence.

Loki gets up, dusting himself off before he moves to the metal door. You slowly walk to a nearby wall and lay down on the ground to rest. He tries to open the door but between the broken control panel and the damage it sustained during the blast, it's no use. He sits next to you, his back against the wall as the radio sparks to life.

"You guys ok?!" Steve asks in a frantic voice.

"We are unharmed," Loki confirms then he looks at you. "Y/N found us somewhere to be protected from the blast but unfortunately we seem to be stuck."

You hang you head in exhaustion and listen to them talk.

"Nat called Tony and the rest of the team. They're on their way but it could be a few hours until we can get you out," Steve tells him. "Just hang tight."

Loki rolls his eyes and sets down the radio, keeping his eyes on you, he says, "Looks like we may be here a while."

You nod in agreement but barely move. You have never been in your bear form for this long before nor have you spent this long constantly fighting and running. You rest your head on your paws and close your eyes.

"Maybe you should become human again," he suggests. "Not that you are not wonderful company as a bear, but you are a bit easier to talk to when you can actually... well talk." He laughs lightly at the last part.

You lift your head to look at him but lower it again slowly. As much as you need to shift back to your human form, you are almost too tired to even think of the pain that awaits you. You know the longer you wait to shift, the worse the pain will be but you just want to sleep.

You finally give into him and push yourself up on all fours, walking away from him with your head hung low. He stays where he is, watching you closely. When you look over your shoulder he lowers his gaze to the floor but not before you see the concern in his eyes.

He is quiet for a moment and says, "I won't watch, if that is what is stopping you." You shake your head no and he sighs. "Do you not want to shift because of how torturous it seems?" You nod without looking at him, unsure how he figured it out when the rest of the team is still in the dark. "Y/N, you are clearly exhausted," he says, touching your fur gently. "You should shift back so you can rest. This form is taking a heavy toll on you."

You move as far from him as you can in the confined space. Closing your eyes, you begin to focus on your breathing, drawing in slow deep breaths as you start the excruciating process of shifting. Your bones feel as if they are breaking and splintering as they shrink to fit your smaller human form. Your muscles ache and cramp from overuse as your extraordinary strength fades away. A growl of pain escapes you as your joints crack and force your body into a more human-like position on your knees.

You curl up in a near fetal position as your body returns to its human form but your senses remain that of a bear. Covering your ears with your hands, you desperately try to block out the smallest sounds which are now amplified. The faint buzzing of the remaining overhead lights, the soft static of Loki's radio, the sparks from the frayed wires. Squeezing your eyes shut, you attempt to protect yourself from how bright the room suddenly seems even thought most of the lights are broken. The smell of smoke, sweat and blood fills your nose and you can do nothing to stop it. You cry out in pain, wishing it would end and all at once, it does.

You try to take a slow, deep breath and are surprised at how easily your lungs open to take in the air. Your heart rate slows and you push yourself into a seated position on the dust covered floor. The sounds and smells that overwhelmed you only seconds ago are gone and you immediately know why.

Loki kneels on the ground in front of you, his eyes locked on yours. A bright green glow emanates from his hands and surrounds you, easing your pain and calming your senses. "Is this helping?" he asks in a low voice and you nod, trying to hold back your tears.

"Why didn't you tell me or anyone else how excruciating this is for you?" he asks, his voice full of worry as he lowers his hands.

You answer quietly, "I can't." Loki is the first person you have allowed to see you shift in almost ten years and it makes you feel vulnerable. You try to stand, wanting to be alone but it's too soon after your shift and you lose your balance.

He catches you in his arms and helps you sit against the wall, your legs still shaking. He sets himself next to you and you lift your head as he waves his hand with another green flourish. "Eat, lille bjørn," he says gently as he hands you a protein bar and sets a bottle of water next to you.

You take a bite of the protein bar and realize it is the one you brought with you. Almost to yourself you say, "I left these on the jet."

"I took your bag," he says as your backpack appears next to him.

"Why?" you take another bite, too tired and hungry to be as annoyed as you want to be at the knowledge that he took your things.

He shifts, crossing his legs as he rubs his hands together, his eyes focused on them. "I knew you would need them. I saw you... in the gym after your final test," he admits and your heart plummets realizing what he saw.

"You saw me...?" you echo his words.

"I didn't mean to," he assures you quickly but it does little to ease your discomfort. You were embarrassed enough that he watched you shift when you knew he was here but for him to have seen you without you knowing was almost to much. He wipes away a tear as it runs down your cheek. "I'm sorry," he says but you don't respond. "I had forgotten something in the training room and when I saw you on the ground like that... I was afraid you were hurt in the fight, you seemed to be in so much pain."

"It wasn't from the fight," you say quietly but you know he already knows that.

"How can you continue to shift when it is so obviously painful for you?" he asks genuinely curious. You ignore his question and finish your bottle of water as he makes a second appear. "You should tell them how hard this is for you," he continues. "You know they would understand if you had to stop."

"No. I can't tell them," you argue quietly and he sighs. "I need to shift. It's hard to explain but... I have to prove that when I'm a bear I can protect my friends and keep the team safe. I have to show everyone that I'm not..." you pause and Loki shifts closer to you, his arm wraps around your shoulder as he gently pulls you towards him. "I need to prove I'm not a monster," you finish, looking down as you bring your knees to your chest.

"Who in this realm could possibly think someone as kind and protective as you could be anything close to a monster?" he asks, his voice laced with true shock. "And that is coming from someone who has quite a lot of experience with the term," he adds trying to ease the tension you feel.

You look up at him and he wipes away another tear. You close your eyes and rest your head against his chest for a moment while you gather your thoughts. He sits quietly, letting you take as much time as you need, his fingers slowly move up and down your arm.

Keeping your eyes closed, you lean into Loki's comforting touch and decide to tell him something you've only ever told one person almost 20 years ago. "The first time I shifted... I was ten," you tell him and he continues to hold you close as you open your eyes.

"My class went on a field trip to the zoo. I remember being so excited that morning," you tell him with a faint smile that fades as you continue. "We spent all day there... my mom even chaperoned," he shifts a bit so he can look at you curiously. "Sometimes parents would come to help the teacher keep track of all the students," you explain and he nods without a word.

"We got to the grizzly bear exhibit and..." you shake your head as the memories flood back. "I don't know how it happened, I didn't mean to but I somehow shifted. I remember pain, excruciating pain and then everyone was screaming. I tried to talk, to tell them it was just me but all I could do was growl. The other students in my class were terrified of me. Everyone was running from me, the students, the teacher, the other parents."

"What about your mother?" he asks.

"My mom..." you say slowly and Loki senses your hesitation. He waits patiently for you to continue, he places a gentle kiss on the top of your head and you look up at him, surprised by the gesture. He gives you a small smile but you can tell he seems worried about his question.

"My mom was so scared," you confirm his fears. "I tried to talk to her, I tried to ask her what was happening because I was scared too but it only came out as roars and growls. She kept moving away from me. I just wanted a hug..." you shake your head and begin to cry more freely. "I scratched her face with my claw when I reached for her then one of the zookeepers came running to... to protect her from me."

"Your mother left you there?" you can hear the anger in his voice.

Loki easily pulls you onto his lap and you turn your face so you can bury yourself against his chest. He rubs your back gently and you sit up after a moment, wiping your eyes. You look up at him and continue, needing to finish. "He shot me with a dart or something, I guess," you shrug. "I woke up a few hours later. It was dark outside and I was human again but I was trapped alone in a small cage. I screamed for I don't know how long but no one came."

You nod, "The next morning someone from Xavier's School for Gifted Youngsters came to pick me up. I never saw my parents again after that. I swear never meant to hurt my mom or scare anyone... I was just so afraid and no one could understand me, no one wanted to help."

He hugs you close and you cling to him, "I'm so sorry my lille bjørn." He touches your cheek gently and lifts your head so you are looking at him. "I understand more than most your desire to not be seen as a monster but I want you to know I never saw you in that light. No one on the team could possibly think you are anything other than amazing and if they do, I will personally set them straight about the matter," he says and you feel a smile creep across your lips. He strokes your cheek and says, "I know it will be pointless to continue to plead with you to stop shifting..."

You nod in agreement and quickly sit up, "I can manage the pain. It only hurts for a little while I promise." He looks concerned still and you add, "Please don't tell the team."

"I know this is something you think you need to do," you nod again. "And I will not tell them under one condition," he says calmly. His fingers lift your chin so you are looking into his eyes. "You have to promise you will let me help you," he says.

"Like you did before?" you ask, referring to when he held back your pain after shifting.

You nods, "I can dull your pain and dampen your senses as you shift. You are too sweet and caring to experience something so horrific for simply trying to help others."

"My little bear," he says as his radio crackles and Steve announces the team will have you both out in half an hour.

You blush at his words but he doesn't let you hide your face as he asks, "Do we have a deal?"

"Its a deal," you laugh quietly.

He smiles and pulls you against his chest again, kissing your forehead lightly. You giggle and look up at him suddenly wishing he would kiss your lips. As if he heard your thoughts, his hand finds your cheek again and he gently brings his lips to yours. "My lille bjørn," he calls you as you rest with your arms around him.

"What does that mean?" you finally ask.

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would've could've should've pt2

See my full list of works here!

Part of the 500 Follower Celebration Requested by: Anonymous

Summary: You and Loki attend an alumni event at your college, hiding in plain sight while on a mission to retrieve information about HYDRA experiments within campus; you cross paths with someone from your past.

Word Count: 6.5k [pace yourself; keep water on standby]

Warnings (spoilers ahead but also you need these): 18+ | heavy themes (retraumatizing; emotional trauma from past relationship; past relationship with severe power imbalance; past relationship involving severely predatory behavior; implied dubcon mentioned in memories); mentions of human experimentation involving drug-induced mental and emotional subjugation; angst; Tony's a-hole tendencies; language [let me know if I missed anything and I'll change it immediately]

Things to be aware of: established relationship; keep the song this is titled after in mind especially "I damn sure never would've danced with the devil at 19"

There'd been a tension between you and Loki ever since that movie night gone wrong where his brother let slip that he was frustrated in his current relationship. At least where physical contact was concerned, or lack thereof. Thor even went so far as to insinuate that Loki doubted his girlfriend even loved him if she wasn't even willing to share her body with him.

The unease was driving the god to the brink of madness, every part of him shaking with the urge to pull you into a room and beg you to tell him what he could do to make things better. He would do just about anything for you, and it pained him to realize that you didn't actually know that.

Perhaps with this new mission that you two were being sent off to, you two could have some much needed time together away from all the noise. And especially away from his brother that thought he knew what was best for him. Thor didn't know a damned thing.

You were best for him. He just needed to be leagues better in showing you that so you could know it as well as he did.

And even though the destination wasn't all that romantic, the god still had a good few tricks up his sleeve that could help him make do with what he had.

"Y/N, quick question about lodging arrangements for your mission with Laufeyson." Loki immediately tuned out all of the other noise around him to listen in on your conversation with the worker from Operations & Logistics. One of the perks he'd found from his Jotun heritage: the enhanced senses that allowed him to eavesdrop even from across the rather spacious room.

"I don't care about the view, Kristy, just stick us wherever," you spoke around the cookie you were munching on.

"Oh, no it's not about the view. You two are booked for a suite, so you'll have a fantastic view of the Hills regardless. Maybe even the Hollywood sign!" She bounded in her spot slightly, clearly excited as she imagined what you'd be seeing from the suite's balcony.

Meanwhile the raven-haired god was already losing himself in the image of sharing some champagne with you, your features illuminated by the city lights. Perhaps stealing multiple kisses through the night.

"I was wondering about the uhh…bedroom arrangements? You want one bedroom or two?"

He was about to speak up, nearly shouting that you only needed a single room with a single bed before you answered, not a single part of you betraying your image of calm consideration. "Two." A pit formed in his stomach as your eyes didn't even dart to steal a glance at him.

"You sure about that, jellybean?" Stark butted in, looking up from his seat at a nearby table with his daughter. "You're supposed to be masquerading as a couple all happy in love and shit."

"Uh huh, sure. In public."

"Alright then. Scenario." He leaned forward on his seat, pointing his writing instrument at you. "Say someone sees you while you're out on the streets, takes an interest in getting photographs of you. You're in Los Angeles, paparazzi's a dime a dozen and some of them know how much pictures of Avengers sell, especially if they look like they're dating. Say our hypothetical pap friend has a telephoto lens that can see into your suite and sees you going into separate rooms. What then?"

You didn't even take a moment to think it over. Instead shrugging and answering him in a perfectly laid back tone, "Couples fight. Paint a smile for the cameras and sleep in separate beds. That's Hollywood, baby."

Loki's pulse thundered in his ears, almost dulling out the way that Stark turned back to his daughter and told her, "You do not ever go to your Auntie Y/N for relationship advice, are we clear?" The little girl only answered her father with a little salute.

Was that what was happening? The tension that ran thick between you two whenever you were so much as in the same breathing space together? Were you fighting?

"Two rooms it is then," the Logistics worker spoke again, tapping away at her tablet before giving both you and Stark a thumbs up, confirming that the reservation had been made.

"Hey, Reindeer Games, jellybean, word of advice? You know, from a friend or colleague or whatever you wanna call me?"

"You're my friend, Stark, I'm Morgan's godmother for fuck's sake," you shot back at the same time that Loki said, "Well an annoyance would be the term I'd use, but go ahead."

"Try to have fun? You're going to your college reunion, Y/N. I'm sure you have some familiar faces you wanna say hi to, reminisce about your random acts of debauchery and dance with like you're 19 again at the club with your fake IDs trying to score some alcohol from the bartender that pretends those cards are legit?" He then turned his focus to Loki. "And you. Try to get some. Unless of course you're still miserably attached to Little Miss Prim and Prissy with a fifty foot pole because she doesn't wanna do the naked tango with you."

"What's a tango?" the smaller Stark queried, looking up from her workbook.

"It's a dance, baby," you answered her, smirking into your drink before you took a sip.

"Naked dancing, Auntie Y/N? I'm confused." The Logistics worker decided to take her leave at this moment, scurrying out of the room with a little nod toward everyone present.

"I know you are, baby." You walked over to her, ruffling her hair before placing a kiss on the top of the little girl's head. "Ask your parents about naked tangos. I'm not gonna be the one to talk to you about the birds and the bees."

"Birds and bees can dance with each other? But isn't a bee too small for a bird?"

"All excellent questions, sweetie." You gave Stark a mischievous look that would have done the god proud had it not been for the knots still sitting heavy in his stomach. "Good luck, Tony. And for the record? I wasn't a party girl in college. Some of us actually had to bury our noses in books and study our way to our degree. We can't all be genius billionaire playboy philanthropists."

"Ah, come on, jellybean, there had to be something you did for fun in college." The way you froze for a fraction of a second didn't go unnoticed by the god, but it seemed to slip past Stark and his daughter all too easily. "Just remember that this shouldn't just be a mission for you, you're gonna be among your old friends. Take a second to...I don't know, mingle. Catch up."

"Stark? The only reason I even agreed to go to the reunion is because of the mission. Our intel found evidence suggesting that HYDRA took over and repurposed a building in my old college and they might be housing volatile maybe even catastrophic kinds of compounds in there, and we're just going for a recon mission. In and out. The only purpose I'd have for mingling is wanting to see who in campus might be involved in the shady shit."

"Fine, whatever floats your boat, Y/L/N. At least go say hi to your old professors, though. Might make their entire year being able to brag to their incoming classes that they once mentored an Avenger back in the day."

For some reason those words from Stark had you freezing up even more, trying to mask it by nodding a little too vigorously before taking a swift leave to the kitchen area, setting your mug down. Loki took that as his opportunity to perhaps have a moment with you before you went off to your apartment for the night. He made his way to you, speaking just barely above a whisper. "Darling, I'm so sorry you had to hear that barb from Stark." His arms ached to simply reach over and pull you into an embrace, the only thing stopping him being the reminder that you both had agreed to keep your current entanglement with one another more private.

But he wanted more than anything to ignore that reminder completely. Especially after looking upon your features and seeing a blank stare of what he horrifyingly recognized as defeat in your eyes.

"It's fine, Mischief," you answered him, your voice monotonous and almost completely devoid of emotion. "He doesn't know he was talking about me. Serves me right anyway. Prim and prissy might as well be tattooed on my forehead."

The god's skin bristled with irritation hearing you repeat the billionaire's words as if you were already accepting of the new unwelcome moniker. "I should have a word with him. Tell him his remarks have the most undesired effect on you. He'll stop, I'm sure of it. Once he knows that it's you. Even be remorseful."

"You tell him and everyone will know," you deadpanned, your face remaining stoic as ever. "He'll tell everyone before the night's over and suddenly what's private isn't so private anymore. Is that what you want?"

He stood silent, staring at you with your blank expression that you'd given him since that disastrous night where Thor made the idiotic remarks that so efficiently drove a wedge between you two. A wedge he somehow didn't know how to dislodge. "I…I simply want for us to be okay."

His heart splintered seeing you give him something between a grimace and a small smile, shrugging before answering in the same flat tone, "Then we're okay."

Then why does it feel as if you're pushing me farther and farther away with every passing day? he wanted to ask you, the words weighing heavy on his tongue as he watched you walk away, back to your apartment. Why does it feel like I've lost you?

The level of guardedness you displayed ever since you stepped foot on your old campus put Loki on high alert. You always exhibited a calculated caution in missions, but this seemed beyond that. There was nothing in your stance that implied your readiness to fight and defend yourself, but rather there was a fear.

A readiness to run. To disappear.

Your shivering in his hold did nothing to convince him of any other explanation. Being here elicited a fear in you that he couldn't comprehend. As if there were ghosts from your past lurking in the shadowy corners of the dimly lit gymnasium.

"Oh my gosh, is that…Y/N?" a high-pitched voice shrieked over the thumping stereo, coming from a rather bubbly looking woman that was bounding toward you, arms outstretched with a wide beaming grin on her face. "I haven't seen you since graduation! Our old profs just can't stop talking about you and how proud they are that they taught an Avenger, they're hoping they get to see you tonight. Get a picture or two." She then turned her attention to Loki, jaw on the floor when he saw his arm gently wrapped around you. "Are you two--?!"

"Ohh! Uhm…no." You worked your way out of Loki's hold to give the woman a friendly embrace before turning back to face him. "Loki, this is Bianca, we shared a good number of classes together. Bianca, this is Loki, my uhh--" Your voice caught in your throat trying to find a word to describe the god.

I'm yours, little mortal. Plain and simple, he wanted to tell you, regardless of present company.

"We work together," you told her, the words worsening the sinking feeling that he had in his stomach. "Work's been a little slow lately so Stark assigned me to show him around and expose him to what a former college girl's life is like."

"College girl? You?" The woman burst into a fit of giggles. "Y/N you were many things when we roamed these halls, but you were more a mini professor than anything. I never once even saw you step foot at a frat party or a club…you were always just hanging out with--"

"You know what, you're absolutely right," you cut her off, your voice louder than normal even with the thumping music surrounding you all. "Loki, maybe you'd be better suited to learn from my old friends. Go off with Bianca, she and the other girls can't possibly steer you wrong."

The god's blood ran cold as your words hit him. He felt as if you were steering him away from you for more than just this moment. As if your sentiment held a poorly veiled secondary sentiment, pushing him away from you so that he could pursue someone else with your blessing.

He did his best to put on a casual smile, to politely decline your offering of your old campus friend. "I accompanied you to learn from you, little mortal," he spoke over the music, reaching for your hand and lacing his fingers between yours. "I wish to stay with you. You cannot rid yourself of me that easily."

"I'm not ridding myself of you, Mischief," you shot back, your friend's eyes darting rapidly between the two of you before slowly stepping away. "It's more of the other way around. We both know that I'm holding you back, so here's your exit--"

"I don't want an exit, Y/N, I want you," he insisted through gritted teeth, fighting every urge to lead you both into a more secluded corner so you could talk this out without having to shout just so you could hear each other. "I wish to be with you, regardless of--"

"Well as I live and breathe, that's a face I didn't think I'd see again." Your eyes widened hearing the voice of the man that approached you next, your pulse beating so furiously that Loki could see it pumping against your neck.

This was definitely not one of your former classmates. The man was middle-aged, his hair obviously colored to mask the silver that was peeking through at the roots as well as his eyebrows. He did what he could to dress himself in line with what was considered stylish but so clearly missed the mark. And emphasizing his age further was the clearly decades younger woman he had as his companion, looking as if she belonged in his classroom rather than in his bedroom.

"Prof--Professor Richardson," you stammered, the breathy almost fearful tone in your voice immediately putting the god on high alert. "Bianca m-mentioned you and the other guys were here tonight."

"Oh, come on Y/N it's been years since you had yourself folded into those awkward armchairs, there's no need to be so formal with me. Please, call me Simon. In fact, I should probably be a touch more formal with you, considering that one of my favorite students is now my favorite Avenger." His eyes quickly darted to the god's. "No offense, dude. You're pretty great, too. There's just something about those spandex suits, you know?"

You gripped Loki's hand tighter for a fraction of a second as the man's eyes roamed your form unabashedly, the spiteful jealousy from his companion written all over her face.

He didn't wait for you to introduce him again as someone you simply 'worked with', choosing to speak up to hopefully soothe your very obvious unease. "I must agree with you there, Y/N quite a remarkable agent." He extended his hand out toward your professor. "I'm Loki. Y/N's boyfriend."

Your breath caught in your throat in a strangled sound at the word, looking up at the god with wide eyes before trying to compose yourself again. Before you could speak, however, Simon did.

"Well if she's as remarkable a girlfriend as she was a student, then you have yourself a real catch right here. You're quite the lucky man--god, I mean." The woman next to him cleared her throat conspicuously loudly, the tail end of it sounding more like a muffled shriek, calling Simon's attention to her. He eyed her with a bit of irritation before turning back to you. "Oh where are my manners? This is Deena. I'm her thesis advisor for her graduating year."

"Oh…that's…" You were quite clearly struggling to form words. You addressed the student instead, your eyes quickly darting to the way she gripped her professor's arm so tightly before looking back at her. "Wow. You're quite the lucky young lady. Professor Richardson mentioned back then that he rarely took on the role of advisor. I'm sure your proposal was nothing short of remarkable."

The student offered you a tight smile in response, opening her mouth to speak before your former professor perked up again. "In all these years, nobody still quite measures up to you, though, Miss Y/L/N. Oh, sorry. Agent Y/L/N." He shifted his gaze to address the god once more. "It was a bleak day when I had to give her her final grade for her final course with me."

He reached his hand out toward you which you took with a slight tremor in your fingers. Loki way too easily heard the gasp that slipped out of you when Simon took your hand in both of his, pressing a lingering kiss to the back of your fingers.

"I hope to see you around some more while you're in town, Y/N." The way he rolled the syllables of your name, like he was savoring a taste on his tongue, didn't sight right with the Asgardian. He was the only one that could speak your name like that. At least…he hoped he still could.

"Yeah…s-sure," you mumbled, jerking your hand out of the professor's hand, subtly wiping the back of it on your skirt when you smoothed your hands over your dress. "En--Enjoy the rest of your night, Simon. Deena." You nodded your head at both of them before walking away abruptly, inadvertently towing Loki behind you.

As you put more distance between you and your former professor, the god heard a muffled sentiment from Simon to his companion. "Of course not, sweet thing, you know you're the only one for me."

There weren't many things that could catch the god off guard, but hearing those words from your former professor sent a slight chill down his spine, the confirmation of his initial suspicions written in black and white. Making him wonder now what your true history with the man that put both of you at a state of unease was.

"Darling, are you alright?" He held you closer to him as the crowd became denser, too many people surrounding you and pushing against you as you moved. "You're cold."

"I'm fine." He could barely hear you over the speakers. "I just need some air, I can barely hear myself think in here."

He didn't need to be told twice; this type of environment wasn't agreeable with him, either. Once you'd both stepped through the doors of the gymnasium and the air no longer tasted of alcohol and sweat, he pulled you into his arms, pressing a soft kiss to your forehead.

"What was that for?" you breathed out, the dazed tone of your voice making him hold you just a touch tighter.

He hadn't the full picture of what had your fight or flight kicking in to an extent he'd never seen on you before, but he held faith that when you were ready, you would tell him. For now, he would do what he could to at least ease your discomfort.

"Can I not simply wish to hold you, my love?"

You briefly wrapped your arms around him, returning his embrace before you took a step away from him, smoothing your hands over your dress once more. "Come on. I wanna find the lab and be done with this mission. Get back to New York sooner rather than later and all that."

His heart splintered even worse in his chest, his suspicion that your stepping away from him was more than simply physical now. That the last fortnight that he'd spent sleeping in his own apartment devoid of the simplest pleasure of having you in his arms as he slept through the night would be how he'd be spending the rest of his nights moving forward. He was at a loss for what he could do to somehow amend your relationship moving forward short of locking you both in a room and offering an ultimatum.

Tell him how he could fix the rift that was caused by Thor's callous words, or tell him that what he feared had finally found its way into your reality. Tell him that there was nothing he could do to mend the damage and that things were truly over between you.

"As you wish, little mortal."

You led him through a search that was guised as an inebriated tour through your alma mater, going through each building with information that you'd either gathered there from firsthand experience from your college years, or from information you amassed looking through testimonials of various alumni.

"Ooh! Come on, I wanna show you something that might just make you proud." You made an entire performance of stumbling toward the god and reaching for his hand, guiding him with carefully choreographed steps backwards with a few planned near slip-ups where you seemed to trip on air and almost fall bum first onto the floor before catching yourself at the last second.

"Don't you know well enough by now, darling, that you constantly impress me?" he shot back at you with a chuckle, fighting every urge to lose himself in the ruse you were both putting on. He wanted more than anything to have this be akin to those films that your fellow teammates were so fond of watching, where the couple would find an empty classroom and proceed to kiss and paw at each other like animals in heat.

He'd found those scenarios so trite before, but he found himself admitting that he was more than open to the idea if the opportunity presented itself with you. He would be willing to do just about anything with you at his side.

"Come on, Mischief," you sing-songed, giggling your way to the heart of one of the buildings dedicated for the science-centric curriculum. "I'm taking to to the lab where we used to brew our own beer. Mix our own booze. You're gonna love it, it's like we were witches brewing potions in here--"

You play-acted your way to stumbling through the double doors of the laboratory, only to be met with resistance and the visual of a thick chain wrapped around the door handles. Immediately you righted your stance, the god signaling to you that he'd taken care of the security cameras. He'd chosen to feed them footage of the two of you indulging in one of those slightly risqué scenarios in the corridor.

With a wave of his hand, the chains materialized on the floor by Loki's feet, and you pushed the doors open to reveal exactly what you'd been looking for. The tables were littered with documents and notes that were watermarked with HYDRA's sigil, each designated work station housing its own compound that when put in the wrong hands, could be utilized in the most sadistic manners.

You went on to look into the filing cabinets that held more research reports while he rounded the table that held the compound surrounded by the most amount of notes scribbled on to the logo-branded papers. He felt the bile rising steadily up his throat at the findings.

Subjects that are exposed to this compound even in its aerated form will feel an intense emotional attachment to the closest set of pheromones within their vicinity, enslaving them to the holder for an indeterminate amount of time. Potency strengthens if the compound is ingested. Theoretically catastrophic potency if somehow introduced directly into subject's bloodstream. Effects inconclusive if holder severs the emotional attachment before the compound has had a chance to be flushed from subject's system, but theoretically, the more potent the remaining dosage that is yet to be metabolized, the more catastrophic the aftermath.

"Darling, they might be experimenting on these students," Loki said grimly, rushing over to you the moment he spotted how much paler your knuckles became from how hard you were gripping the countertop. "What's wrong?"

"There are reports dating back to before you even got to Earth," you told him, the shakiness of your tone at its worst as you tried to speak through the tears bubbling up inside you. "Back to when I was still here."

He thumbed through the report that you were perusing and had to fight every urge to set fire to the entire operation and lay waste to the names that he'd found on the user tests. The most frequent one being the man that he had the displeasure of meeting earlier, Simon Richardson. "These other names, were they your other professors?" You only nodded. He didn't know whether to be relieved or even more horrified realizing that the subject names were kept confidential, hidden under monikers such as "Subject 12-29-A", "Subject 12-29-B" and so forth.

"I think the first number's the year. 12 is 2012. And the second number might be a batch number." You took a few deep breaths before straightening your stance and looking for the nearest computer, fiddling with the comms bracelet that Shuri had equipped you with before you left New York. "Shuri, are you there?"

"I am here, I am here. How is the college party? I have never actually been to one since--"

"Since you're so smart you should probably be teaching these classes, I know I know." A bit of your liveliness came back speaking with the young genius. Loki could even hear a slight smile in your voice. "Could you pull off a remote duplication? I wanna get these experimentation reports to you guys so that we can already start on next moves before Laufeyson and I even get back to New York."

"Does the sun rise in the East, my friend?" The Wakandan princess began to laugh from her end of the call, the sound filling the room. "Put your bracelet near the device and let me do my magic." You did as she instructed, holding your wrist near the computer's power source and a few short moments later, she spoke again. "All done. We will see you when you get back."

"Thanks, Shuri. We'll wrap it up here. I'll see you guys in the morning."

As you shut off your comms and both of you proceeded to place things back exactly where you found them, ensuring that you lessened your chances of HYDRA suspecting anyone had rifled through their research, there was yet another thought that led to a pit forming in Loki's stomach.

What if one of the test subjects in those reports was you?

Loki laid awake, restless, in bed since you both got back to your suite, doing his best to somehow induce slumber upon himself so that he wouldn't have to fight against his mind wandering back to those reports, wondering if one of the subjects that was detailed within those pages could be referring to you. As well as fighting against the parts of him that feared you were pushing him away, forcing his hand into letting you go even if that was the last thing he would ever wish to do.

He had to make a note to give that oaf Thor a swift stab for so thoroughly jeopardizing what could have possibly been the best thing to happen to him. He was more than content with you, he was happy. He could picture what a future with you would be like.

And yes, it would be nice if your relationship would have a physical aspect to it, but that was no dealbreaker for the god. He didn't need it right this second, and for you, he would wait until you reached that level of comfort with him. At your own pace.

He would wait. Even if it meant he waited forever.

Yet here you both were now, sleeping in separate beds in separate rooms all because you believed that he would be better off with someone who had no compunctions on disrobing with him at a moment's notice. He could already feel you slipping away despite how desperately he tried to hold on to you.

The sound of your unrest had him sitting up on his bed, a series of whimpers and cries being heard from your bedroom. What got him darting out and bursting through your door, however, was your scream of "Please no I've been good to you! Why would you do this to me?!"

In a heartbeat he was by your side, cradling you against his chest and trying to wake you from your nightmare. "Shh shh, little mortal, you're safe, please wake up."

"I never told a soul I don't even look at you when there's other people please don't leave me," you kept whimpering, your words hitting the god like bullets straight to his heart. Were you having a nightmare about him?

"I'm here, my love, please. I'm not going anywhere just please wake up," he pleaded desperately, rubbing his hand up and down your back as he pressed multiple kisses to your templed. "I'm here I'll never leave you. Please darling, I love you."

You finally began to breathe a bit slower in his arms, moving so that you were looking up at him with red-rimmed eyes. "Loki?"

Had he been on his feet, the sight of you so distraught would have brought the god to his knees. "Oh my sweet mortal." He cupped your face, wiping your tears away before he pressed a kiss between your brows. He wordlessly maneuvered you into his arms so that he could carry you out of bed and into the kitchen area, fetching you a glass of water.

"I can't--" You sounded as if you were trying to speak through a lump in your throat, more tears falling from your eyes. "I can't talk about--"

"No, darling, it's alright." He placed his hands on your shoulders, trying to guide you into evening out your breaths. "You don't need to tell me anything you're not ready to."

"I want to," you insisted, keeping your eyes glued to the floor, refusing to meet his gaze. "I just--I can't bring myself to say the words, but I need you to know…why. Why I can't--" You cut off with a squeak, gripping the sides of your stool so tightly he feared the metal would start hurting you, so he took them into his hands instead. "Why I can't be with you…physically."

"Darling, please I've told you I don't need--"

"No, you should know. I…I need you to know. I just can't…articulate the words." You started breathing the same way that you would when you would run with the rest of the team, as if your body was compensating for lack of oxygen the best it could. Or as if you were preparing yourself for something particularly uncomfortable. "But I can show you."

"Y/N what are you--"

"I want you to look into my memories. I want you to see. And understand what I can't tell you with words."

He framed your face with his hands, urging you to look at him before he followed through with your request. "Are you absolutely certain, my love?" You just stared at him with your red-rimmed tear-stricken eyes, the surrender and pain in them breaking his heart more than your stoic monotonous attitude from the past weeks ever could. He pressed another kiss to your forehead. "Alright."

He pulled up a seat close to yours, bracing himself for what he would find once he entered your memories. He was terrifyingly right to have done so, because the moment he was hit with the torrents of memories, he would have been brought to his knees had he been upright.

You're such a bright young lady. Such a shame that your peers refuse to see that. How about we grab a cup of coffee? Enjoy it in the faculty area? It'll be way more comfortable than sitting on the floor for the next three hours.

I was supposed to have dinner with some of the other professors but the weather in their area has them stuck at home. Would you like to join me instead? It'd be a shame for the reservation to go to waste.

Loki had to fight back the urge to retch as the visual of Simon Richardson leaning in to kiss you hit him next. And the distant attitude that he extended to you the following day on campus as you crossed paths in the hallway.

It won't be wise for us to be seen together or else people are going to start suspecting something going on. I'll get into trouble, just because we love each other. Of course I love you, silly sweet thing, you're the only one I've ever felt this way for.

He saw multiple occurrences of the professor dropping your hand the second someone even unfamiliar to either of you rounded the corner, a guilt eating away at him as he realized he'd done the same thing with you. He simply didn't want you to have to be exposed to the judgment from the team for being involved with him.

Nobody can know. It has to be our little secret. You understand, don't you? How about we go away somewhere for the weekend? Just you and me? Somewhere where we can actually be a couple. Do couple things. We could walk around and hold hands without being scared of getting caught. I could kiss you whenever and wherever. We could just be…us.

Loki wanted more than anything to look away from the memories of your first night with Richardson. From the way that he was so careless with your body, so ignorant of your pleasure and yet he mumbled empty sentiments of love all throughout the night, insisting that he loved you despite his eyes staying empty. Calculating.

And just a few short weeks after that, and a few more nights spent at his place, you went to campus one morning. And he'd begun to go out for coffee with another student. Someone from the batch of freshmen that had just come in. Your messages went unanswered, your calls were met with the generic voice message prompt.

He discarded you once he had what he desired from you, and foolishly concluded that he could do better.

As if there was anyone better.

When he opened his eyes, his vision was blurred from his own tears, the guilt steadily wearing him down as your explanation hit him as if they were bricks being catapulted his way. Was this the reason you were so hesitant to share his bed? You were afraid that once he claimed your body, he would replace you with another?

Your words from two weeks ago haunted him. If you want to be with someone else, just promise me you'll tell me and leave me first.

"My love," he choked, pulling you into a tight embrace. "I could never do something so vile. Not to you. Never to you. I'm so sorry."

"It's fine," you answered weakly, your sniffles breaking him even more. "You didn't know." You made a motion to move out of his arms, the fear seeping into him again that you were going to completely pull away again, making him hold on to your hands tightly. Desperately. "Come on, we have to get some sleep. We're going back to New York in the morning."

"Do you wish to be alone?" He could barely form the words, desperately pleading silently for you to allow him to stay with you tonight.

"No," you confessed, shifting nervously where you stood. "But I don't want you to feel obligated because of what you saw--"

"I won't leave you." The words came out of him in a rush, his lips quivering as he pressed a kiss to your forehead again, trying to calm himself. Trying his best not to march his way back to campus and personally see to it that that wretched excuse of a man not only paid for what he'd done to you, but ensure that he would never do this to another innocent unsuspecting woman ever again.

Trying to remind himself that his need to ensure that you were alright at this moment was greater than his desire to have Simon Richardson's head on a spike.

"You say that now, but we know that one day you're going to be tired of waiting. You have needs--"

"I need you more. I want you more," he insisted, burying his nose in your hair, your presence keeping him grounded. "I promised you I would spend my days proving my devotion to you. I more than intend to keep this promise. I am yours, precious little mortal." He kissed a path to your ear. "All I want at this moment is to stay with you tonight. Let me hold you. Let me try to fight your night terrors away."

It was as if a weight was lifted off his chest when you wordlessly nodded, wrapping your arms around his neck and letting him carry you back to your bedroom.

Loki held you through the night, relieved that you didn't stir in his arms or show any sign that you might have fallen into another nightmare. However, the god was now haunted by a memory of his own. One from the first few days of your relationship.

Darling, I think it best that perhaps…we don't tell the others quite yet that we've become involved. Grant ourselves the privacy that they won't.

His own words echoed in his mind, taunting him of the monumental mistake he'd made asking you to agree to such selfish terms. How he enforced that agreement by committing actions that eerily echoed the very memories that haunted you now.

He remembered the look in your eyes when he uttered those words, asking you to aid him in hiding your relationship away from the rest of the team. When he closed his eyes he could see the crestfallen expression on your face so vividly, making him despise himself for ever causing you to mar your features with that pain you tried to hide from him.

And finally…the realization that gutted him. You never agreed to those terms. All you said in response was "That makes sense".

You simply surrendered.

"I'm so sorry, my darling mortal," he spoke into the darkness, holding you just a fraction tighter, fearing that if he let go even in the slightest, you might slip away from him. "I'll make things better. I will do right by you, I swear it."

A/N: Lemme just…slide a dagger Loki's way real quick. 😤😤

And lemme offer this as my apology for this chapter…

I can promise u that Simon will get what's coming to him in the final part of this story. And I can promise that Loki will in fact make things right with his bb 🥺🥺

'everything' taglist: @simplyholl @loopsisloops @imalovernotahater @coldnique @loz-3 @huntress-artemiss @salempoe @vickie5446 @athalialaufeyson @lokiprompts @kats72 @kikster606 @asgards-princess-of-mischief @lokixryss @thomase1 @mischief2sarawr @lovingchoices14 @lunarnights95 @goblingirlsarah @iamlokisgloriouspurpose @creationsbyme @maple-seed @mjsthrillernp @ladyofthestayingpower @mygfloki @sititran @glitterylokislut @ozymdias @fictive-sl0th  @lokidbadguy @mochie85 @silverfire475 @joyful-enchantress @elizabethmidnight2017 @holdmytesseract @smolvenger @gigglingtiggerv2 @lokidokieokie @superficialdomina @kmc1989 @november-rayne @goddessofwonderland @buttercupcookies-blog @peaky-marvel @lokiified @tom-hlover @dryyoursaltyoceantears @cabingrlandrandomcrap

[just-aake]

Marry Me?

Pairing : Natasha Romanoff x fem!reader

Summary:  You "teasingly" ask Natasha to marry you at different times even though you two are not together.

Warnings: angst, brief mentions of sexual themes

Words: 919

a/n: first time writing and posting something like this

“Marry me?”

Natasha quirks her eyebrows unamusedly as she pins your body to the training mat for the third time in a row.

Not the best moment for such a proposal you have to admit. You were drenched in sweat and completely out of breath. Your whole body was screaming in pain with areas that you know will definitely feel sore later on. 

Meanwhile, above you, Natasha still looks as composed as when you both started the training session. With her red hair tied back, letting you see her green eyes, always focused and confident, and a slight sheen of sweat on her face, giving you a small satisfaction that you actually gave her a challenge.

You let out a breath in awe as you stare up at her.

She’s so beautiful.

Her lips curl into a small smirk as she moves away, standing up again. Her hand stretches out towards you.

“Sure…if you ever land a hit.”

You groan as she pulls you up for another round.

Within minutes, you are thrown back to the ground with your breath knocked out of you again. You wave your hand in surrender as you lay flat, your body unwilling to move anymore.

“I think I’m done,” you breathe out, staring at the white tile ceiling above.

Turning your head to look at her, you watch as Natasha walks to the other side of the room, collecting her things. She takes a drink from her water bottle, and you can’t help but be captivated by the sight.

“Better luck next time,” Natasha calls out as she exits the training room.

~~~~~~~ ⧗ ~~~~~~~

“Marry me?” you moan as you take another bite of the dish Natasha made for dinner at the Avengers Compound.

Natasha rolls her eyes as she hands you a napkin to wipe your mouth.

Around the table, the other members are amused by your comment. 

Tony laughs and wriggles his brows at Natasha and you, teasing, “Oh, when’s the wedding?”

Meanwhile, Thor looks between you and Natasha in confusion, “I was not aware Y/N and Natasha were in a relationship.”

His comment makes Tony laugh harder which earns him a hard kick from the red hair avenger, knocking him off his chair and to the ground.

“We’re not. She’s just playing around. Right, Y/n?” Natasha looks at you, brows raised, expecting you to back her up like you always do.

You give her your most convincing smile, hiding your feelings perfectly.

“Right”

~~~~~~~ ⧗ ~~~~~~~

“Marry me?” you murmur against her lips as she brings you in for another deep kiss.

Natasha has you pressed against your bedroom door, her body pinning you in place. You moan against her mouth when you feel her tongue enter yours, deepening the kiss.

Before you realize it, she maneuvered you through your room, and your back hits your bed as she moves on top of you.

Never once breaking any contact. Natasha’s hands are all over you, removing all of your clothing and leaving a warmth and fire everywhere she touches.

And when her hand moves down your body and between your legs, your previous words are forgotten by both of you as you scream her name in pleasure. 

Later that night, you fall asleep with her body wrapped around yours, her arms around your waist holding you tightly against her chest.

In the morning, you wake up alone.

~~~~~~~ ⧗ ~~~~~~~

“Marry me?” you cough out, feeling your blood drip down the side of your mouth. You feel the pressure of her hands press down harder against your wounded stomach at your words.

Natasha doesn’t look at you. Her eyes focused on keeping your blood in your body as she yells into the comms.

“Steve, Y/n needs help! Now!” 

You can still hear shooting from the battle outside.

You’re positive the rest of the team’s having a tough time breaking through, especially to get to your position.

Your body feels weak and in pain. It reminds you of that day in the training room with Natasha. The memory reminds you of Natasha’s words.

With your remaining strength and a lot of effort, you slowly raise your hand and let it fall against her hands in a light slap.

She finally looks at you at the contact. Her usual red hair is matted gray with dust and dirt from the battle. Her green eyes now shining with unshed tears and her face is pinched with worry as she looks at you. 

She’s still the most beautiful sight you’ve ever seen.

You give her a small smile as you whisper, “I landed a hit…”

Your eyes slowly close with your vision fading to darkness as you see her face change to panic. The last thing you remember is the feeling of warmth of her hand on yours and the sound of your name from her lips.

~~~~~~~ ⧗ ~~~~~~~

“Y/n…,” Natasha’s words echo softly in the room. The sound of your slow heartbeat monitor beeps in response.

She’s sitting next to your bed, clasping your hand in hers as she watches the small rise and fall of your chest, reassuring her that you were okay.

You were still alive.

The doctors say they are not sure when you will regain consciousness, but it didn’t matter.

Natasha was not going to leave your side. Not until you wake up and give her an answer.

Natasha brings your hand to her lips, pressing a soft kiss there, before whispering against your skin, “Marry me…?”

~~~~~~~ ⧗ ~~~~~~~

a/n: thank you for reading! Side Story : Love in Red

Part 2

[agaypanic]

Every Night (Spider-Man!Chase Davenport X Reader)

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Summary: Chase Davenport is a Mission Creek High student who takes pictures by day, and a bionic web-slinging superhero who fights crime by night. Tonight, he swings by your place with a split lip, a bruised rib, and a wounded ego.

A/N: holy shit an actual fic instead of a shitpost, who would’ve guessed? spiderman au where chase is spiderman bc 📖anon and i agreed that chase davenport is totally peter parker coded (specifically andrew garfield’s). side note: if this was a full avengers au, chase would be spiderman, davenport would be iron man, adam would probably be thor, bree would be black widow, and leo would probably be captain america or the hulk (it’d be funny to see him go from this little stick figure to a giant beefy mutant man). This is most likely not medically accurate

***

“Hold that,” Chase muttered just loud enough for you to hear, adjusting the settings on his new camera. “Stay still.”

“Chase, lunch is gonna be over soon.” You teased, but still held your position as requested.

You heard your boyfriend take a picture, and then a few more. There were a few more flickers of the camera shutter before Chase got up and rounded the picnic table to sit next to you. “What do you think?” Chase asked, showing you the couple of pictures he had just taken.

“I think you make me look really pretty.”

“Nah.” Chase shook his head before kissing your cheek. “That’s all you.”

“Big flirt.” You smiled, taking the camera out of his hands and setting it on the table to kiss him without interruption. Unfortunately, the school bell didn’t get the memo about you wanting to be undisturbed. Chase pouted when you pulled away, making you laugh. “Will I see you tonight?”

Chase stood up, grabbing his camera and your hand. “You always do, babe.”

***

Chase was right; you always did see him. But your question should have been whether he’d come through your front door as Chase Davenport or through your window as Spider-Man. The follow-up question would have been whether or not he’d be bloody and bruised.

Unfortunately, the answer to both questions were the latter options tonight.

“You’re lucky my parents aren’t home,” you said as you helped your boyfriend into your room, trying to avoid the blood-saturated parts of his suit. “Who was it this time?”

“Green Goblin.” Chase winced, plopping down on your bed while he clutched his side. You grabbed the little first aid kit that you kept under your bed ever since finding out about your boyfriend’s super identity. “I was doing my patrol when he just flew by out of nowhere. I didn’t even feel him coming.”

You could hear Chase’s disappointment in his voice as he recounted the events. The fight was difficult, as the wounds you were helping him clean up proved. 

After wiping the blood off his chin from his split lip, you scooted back a little and gestured to Chase’s chest. “Suit off.”

“At least buy me dinner first.” Chase tried to laugh but instead groaned in pain as he pressed the spider emblem on his suit that loosened the once skin-tight fabric. You helped pull the suit off enough to reveal Chase’s chest. It was bruised, sweaty, and heaving. “Hey, my eyes are up here.”

“Shut up.” You rolled your eyes from his teasing and continued tending to Chase’s wounds. “You know, sometimes I wonder why you don’t go to Mr. Davenport for this. I’m sure Davenport Industries has actual nurses, or at least better medical supplies than a homemade first aid kit.”

Chase’s hand, a little shaky from his exhaustion, cupped your cheek, making you tear your eyes away from his purpling side. “I always visit you every night. A little beating isn’t gonna stop me from that.”

You scoffed. You wouldn’t exactly call this a ‘little’ beating. “Okay, but if you get some kind of infection or lifelong medical problem, don’t blame me.”

The rest of your aid was accompanied by silence. You were focused on cleaning Chase up to the best of your abilities, while he was focused on your focus. He wished he had his camera to capture the moment, ignoring the fact that he was wounded and in pain.

“Done,” you said after a long half hour. “Now, go take a shower. You’re all sweaty and gross.”

“I didn’t hear you complain when you were staring at my glistening abs.” Chase teased as he slowly stood up, kicking his suit off so he was only in his boxers.

You playfully swatted at him. “Just go. I’ll have a movie ready when you’re done.”

“And snacks?” Chase looked over his shoulder, looking at you with a pleading look. You nodded, following him out of your room, parting so he could go to the bathroom and you to the kitchen.

“And snacks.”

[linkemon]

Glass Houses (Thorfinn x Reader)

Friendly reminder that English is not my first language. You can check my Masterlists both in English and Polish here. Consider supporting me on Ko-fi. You can also check out my commissions if you’re interested.

Other oneshots can be found here.

ᴛʜᴏʀꜰɪɴɴ ᴅɪꜱᴄᴏᴠᴇʀꜱ ᴛʜᴀᴛ ᴠɪɴʟᴀɴᴅ ᴡᴀꜱ ᴀᴄᴛᴜᴀʟʟʏ ᴡɪᴛʜ ʜɪᴍ ᴀʟʟ ᴀʟᴏɴɢ…

— Shit — [Reader] hissed through clenched teeth.

She gingerly touched her right thigh. Blood ran down her fingers and dripped onto the fresh snow, staining it bright red. Her leg throbbed with a dull pain. She gripped her knife tighter, never taking her eyes off her opponent. [Reader] knew that the prolonged ranged combat was working against her. The loss of blood was making itself felt, making her dizzy and her strength was fading.

The scout wasted no time. He lunged again with his blade raised, looking for weak points. He feigned a blow to the exposed left side, then struck the right. The girl didn't have time to jump away. The sword left a bloody wound on her forearm. The man, carried by his momentum, kicked her straight in the stomach. The force of the impact knocked the air out of her lungs. She raised her head, panting heavily. Just in time, she noticed a shadow looming behind the figure of her pursuer. She ducked. The scout froze with a look of shock on his face. He grabbed his chest, where the knife was stuck. He fell to his knees. He died quickly.

From behind the motionless body emerged the saviour — Thorfinn.

— You're an idiot — he said.

— I had to check on things. — She tore off a piece of her shirt, tying it below her thigh, then tried to stand up on her own.

— Ear said he'd check the situation. Don't push yourself where you're not needed. — He pulled the girl up with such force that she staggered.

The boy had a great urge to tell her again that she was stupid but he held back.

— Can you go?

He received a negative shake of his head.

— By Thor…— he sighed.

He crouched down, allowing her to climb onto his back. [Reader] bit her cracked lips, trying to block out the pain. Eventually, she grabbed him by the neck, allowing herself to be carried toward the campsite.

The boy's body pleasantly warmed her chilled body. She tried with all her might not to chatter her teeth. The forest was very cold. In addition, snowflakes began to fall from the cloudy sky.

— God bless you — she mumbled out of habit.

— I don't believe in your God.

— I don't see a problem.

He did not comment on it.

She didn't stay silent for very long.

— Thorfinn?

Again he did not answer.

She shook his arm with her left, less tired hand.

— Can we talk about what happened? — she asked quietly.

Her thoughts were in disarray. If it weren't for the physical exhaustion, she probably wouldn't have returned to the subject. But now felt like as good time as any.

— Just don’t go scouting by yourself anymore — the boy replied gruffly.

— That's not what I'm talking about.

She felt that the other person knew exactly what she meant but deftly avoided the topic.

Her mind wandered to the previous evening. She could still feel the boy's lips on hers. A hand, much larger and rougher, stroked her cheek. The kiss was timid. It was surprisingly different from the young warrior's personality. Concern danced in his eyes. She felt as if everything had ended only a moment ago.

— I meant...— She trailed off, feeling a slight warmth rise to her cheeks. — About yesterday — she finished more quietly.

In her mind it seemed easy. Saying it out loud was much harder.

Thorfinn remained silent as he trudged steadily through the snow with her on his back.

— Let’s just not go back to this. — His voice was cold.

The girl couldn't notice her trembling lower lip.

— Why?

— Because I have nothing to tell you.

This was where the other side of the boy came out. The inseparable parts of his character that he showed to everyone on Askeladd's team.

[Reader] was feeling weak and it was becoming easier for her to say things out loud that she normally wouldn't.

— It's simple. Yes or no — she stated defiantly.

— Then no — he replied, feeling the great, bitter weight of the words he was saying.

— Put me down.

— NO.

— Let me get down.

Thorfinn didn't comply, so the girl loosened her grip around his neck. She fell straight into a small snowdrift, letting out a groan of pain.

The boy deep down shuddered at the sound.

— Tell me that straight to my face.

He didn't do that. He headed towards the camp visible from behind the snowy hill.

This was too much for her. The ignorance hurt.

— Do you care? You weren't like this yesterday! You're a coward, Thorfinn, son of Thors! — she cried hoarsely. — You're afraid of love!

His father's name hit the Viking like a bucket of icy water.

— I'm not scared, damn it! — He turned around, furious. — I just can't give it to you! Do you know how my family must feel after Askeladd killed dad? You don't want to go through that — he finished, his tone so pained that [Reader] felt like she was seeing him for the first time in her life.

— Why do you decide for me? How do you know how much I can endure?

She could barely hold back the tears welling up in her eyes. She felt as if something was slipping away from her forever.

— Because you’re too weak — he muttered.

The boy saw [Reader] trying to speak up for the villagers. She begged Askeladd not to murder the people but he did what he wanted anyway. What's more, he helped him do it. He didn't care much about the slaughter. It was just another task standing in the way of revenge.

From then on, the girl prayed even more often. Every day, she knelt with Canute and Ragnar. She clasped her hands, tilted her head upward and mumbled something about forgiveness and sins.

She might have been a fighter but she had too much mercy. Her soul was too gentle. Thorfinn found that the only real weakness she had was her Christian faith.

Somewhere deep inside him a sadistic urge rose to tell her more about his thoughts. About how stupid it seemed that she cared about the prince, the advisor, the villagers, the band of Vikings, and most of all him.

But then he saw a memory from the hunt. She had invited herself along. Despite that, the unexpected company didn’t bother him. He looked at the focused face and wondered why she reminded him of Thors. Neither her features, nor her posture, nor her words were like those of the great warrior. But as he sat with her at the table, staring into the bowl of soup they had cooked together, he felt strangely familiar. He laughed at her poor archery skills, trying to chase away the returning childhood.

Maybe that was why he kept the bile from rising in his throat and "go away" was the only words that left his lips.

— Thorfinn…— She grabbed his hand but he jumped back as if burned.

— I can’t. — He turned toward the campsite.

— I don't agree to this, do you understand?

She ran over, ignoring her bleeding thigh.

The boy struggled, trying to free himself from his grip. [Reader] however, held him tightly around the waist, not willing to let go. She didn't stop even when he kicked her injured leg.

— I know I might be left alone and I know that such a loss will hurt.

The Viking didn't have the strength to push her away. He felt too weak.

— Why — he heard his pained voice say — why do you want to be with me?

— Because love is worth the risk. — She snuggled closer.

— How do you know that? — He sighed, hugging her awkwardly.

— God told me. — She raised her eyes upward.

Thorfinn followed her gaze and it seemed to him that a ray of sunlight flashed from behind the snow clouds. But that didn't matter now. He no longer had to seek the warm light and the wide green meadows. In that moment he was closer to Vinland than he had been in his entire life.

[imtryingbuck]

Birdie

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x fem!Reader

Summary: The team lose their friend (I’m bad at summaries sorry)

Word count: 1,532

Warnings: Angst. My terrible attempt at a fight scene. 

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Her hand slowly came up to her face, removing the bottom half of her mask then the glasses.

They couldn’t believe it.

They didn’t want to believe it.

“Y/n?”

~~~

Bucky’s heart was in his throat, his eyebrows raised and pulled together.

It can’t be he repeated in his head, he watched her die, he watched as the Hulk picked up the rubble and threw them like they weighed nothing. He held her in his arms the whole way home trying to attack the people who took her cold lifeless body away from his arms.

Frozen in place in the middle of the road he didn’t want to believe it, it couldn’t have been her. Yes this woman standing in front of them all posture upright and ready to attack had their friends face, same colour eyes, the same scar on her lip from the time Y/n fell over whacking her face off the kitchen counter busting her lip wide open, the exact same scar that went across her eyebrow from where she was beaten many missions before her untimely demise - she had copied Steve’s words ‘I can do this all day’ which was accurately true, making everyone who heard her through her comms laugh.

The three things wrong with this woman who was standing in front of them was, one - her eyes were so dark, nothing like Y/n who’s eyes were always so bright and full of life, joy and wonder. Two - their friend, their crazy friend who always made everyone laugh, their friend who always had their best interests at heart would never ever let anyone hurt them, taking bullets and hits just for them, let alone try and attack them. And three, their friend was dead.

“Is…is that Y-Y/n?” Clint’s raspy voice sounded through their comms.

Bucky watched as her head tilted ever so slightly to the left, his whole body went rigid as he knew what that head tilt meant.

She was about to attack.

And sure enough six individual 10 inch claws came out of her knuckles.

“What do we do?” Nat questioned.

“We can’t hurt her!” Tony says.

“Wanda control her!” Orders Steve.

Bless the redheads heart, she was trying. And failing. “I-I’m trying!”

Little bird/Y/n’s eyes shifted from Bucky to Wanda and before any of them could do anything Wanda was thrown backwards.

Like idiots they took their eyes off of the woman all in black, when they turned around the panic they already felt amplified by a thousand.

She was no longer there.

“Clint you’ve got a visual?” Steve asks.

“No…”

They heard a high pitch screeching sound of metal against metal scraping together from behind them, they turn to face that way when they hear the sound again from their original position.

“She’s toying with us”

“I’ve got a visual” Clint speaks.

“Clear shot?” Steve asks.

“What? You can’t be serious!” Bucky all but shouts.

“We injure her and then we’ll grab-“

“I wouldn’t do that if I was you” The voice that they hadn’t heard in real time for 6 long painful years suddenly says just as she appears in front of them. 

“Y/n?” Whispered Bucky.

Her eyes flickered ever so slightly but they all catch it. “Buck say her name again” Steve says.

And he does, this time they all see a flash of recognition in her eyes “Metal man talk to her” Tony tells him.

Taking in a deep breath he slowly breaths out, “Y/n? I know you’re in there doll, I can see it. It’s okay I promise. Please come back to me-us, it’s oka-“

The look on her face of her remembering vanished, along with their hope. “You must take out the strongest first in order to succeed” Winking at them, she throws Steve into a car.

Thor was then thrown.

Then Nat.

Then Sam and Tony at the same time.

Then Bruce.

Keeping them all pinned along with Wanda she stared down Bucky then smirked. “You’re the strongest you know?”

“Why didn’t you throw me first then?”

“Because… you’re the one that makes me stronger. Always have. Always will.”

“Y/n you can come back from thi-“

“Like you once said Solider, it always ends in a fight. And that’s what we shall do”

Before he even had the chance to talk some sense into her or move position she launched herself at him, throwing punch after punch to his face and body causing him to grunt in pain.

“Fight. Back. Soldat” Each word ending with a hard blow to his face.

“No” Bucky rasped out. He doesn’t want to fight back, even when they use to train together he always went easy on her - not because he was scared to hurt her but because the thought of laying a hand on her in a violent way made him feel sick to his stomach.

“Fight or die”

For Bucky it was an easy choice. Didn’t even have to think about it. Didn’t even hesitate to go to his knees, he blanked out the shouting from behind him. “You’re going to have to kill me Y/n/n because I’m not going to fight you”

Her eyes squinted and one eyebrow raised up “Coward”. She spat out. 

“You’re the one hesitating now Y/n… what does that make you?” Bucky could tell that the woman he loves was still there and trying to break through, well he hoped he could see it and it wasn’t just his hopefulness playing tricks on him.

“If killing me brings you back to our friends then doll, do it. Please”

Her face hardened as she stared him down, her stance faltered. As she squared her shoulders she looked around at the people she had pinned down. “I-I don’t want to do this but you’re my mission. So fight back”

“Okay, okay I’ll do it” He gets up slowly, he hopes that what he’s about to do is all worth it.

He throws the first punch, then the next and the next. His stomach turns at his actions but he continues to fight the love of his life.

Spitting blood out of her mouth, with her left leg she kicks him in his stomach, making him fly backwards landing just a few inches away from Steve. She makes her way towards them as he jumps up onto his feet, they meet in the middle and continue to throw punches and kicks at each other.

The Avengers hearts were beating rapidly as they watch their friends try and kill one another.

Due to the super soldier serum coursing through their veins neither one backs down, neither one grows tired.

Her claws come out and he gulps, he tries to use his vibranium arm as protection against her adamantium claws knowing his arm is stronger.

Bucky had managed to dodge the umpteenth attack when her claws dug in and sliced him across his stomach causing him to scream out in agony, he dropped to his knee’s clutching his stomach with both hands. A lone tear drops from his bright blue eyes as he looked at her.

“It’s okay…”

Y/n dropped to the floor and scrambled backwards, her eyes bounced from Bucky’s to her claws - that were covered in his blood, looking at them in horror and disgust.

“It’s okay” He kept repeating to her, he could see that it was her and not the puppet Hydra had created.

“Bucky? Bucky I’m so sorry, oh my God, what have I done, I’m sorry” His heart broke for the last time at the pain in her voice.

The team were finally able to move, their invisible chains letting them go, they all made their way to Bucky’s aide.

“I’m so sor-sorry”

Tony slowly put one foot in front of the other towards the girl who he had unofficially adopted, whose whole body shook with sobs “Sweetheart, can I ask you a question?” Their friends looked puzzled at him.

“W-w-what?”

“What’s your nickname for Bucky?”

“Buckaroo”

Tony released a strangled noise, between a laugh and a sob. “It’s okay sweetheart, look at me, he’ll be okay I promise and so will you”

“No no no I hurt hi-him”

“He’s okay Y/n/n I promise” He got closer to her and dropped to his knees “Ca-can I hold you?” He sees the hesitation in her eyes before she nodded, he didn’t waste any time in pulling her into his arms. Holding her closer and tighter as he humanly could, he couldn’t help himself from crying. For 6 years he’s not been able to touch her, to give her a hug. He cries with her, softly telling her ‘everything will be okay’.

Despite the pain that Bucky feels in his stomach he doesn’t stop the smile from forming on his split lips or the tears from falling.

They all stand there watching Tony cling on to their friend who they thought they had lost 6 years prior.

None of them had a dry face. None of them knew that when they woke up this morning they were going to be reunited with their friend.

Their friend, a huge part of their blended and mismatched family was alive and back.

<Previous   Next>

Tags: @bethexo07 @doublebassallie @vicmc624 @cyberficlya @elijahssuit @learisa @unaxv @sapphirebarnes

~ banner credit goes to @sweetpeapod ~

[thewritersaddictions]

Day Thirteen: Thor Odison + Size Difference

You've always been just a little smaller then all of tour coworkers. Always smaller then all of the Avengers. Iron man having invited you to work alongside them as a sort of secartary, and helper.

You aren't sire how you become the apple of Thor's eye. Maybe it was the fact that you thought he was the most handsome man on the planet. Hell he wasn't even from this planet. Thor had taken a liking to you as well. Showing it in odds way. He wasn't the best at being a genetleman, and maybe that was due to his stature or his larger then life attitude.

Regardless of all of that. You still fell deeply for Thor. He didn't fall though. He gripped you tight, and took you for the ride of your life. "Fuckin' hell you're tiny." Thoses were his fidrt words to you when he saw you. You froze, and since then your height has been something you worry he doesn't like about you.

That all changed, when one night after the avengers put their bodies through a bad training session, and an almost worrisome call for them. Thor came looking for you. "Do you wish to see something beautiful?" He asked, not bothering to knock on your door. You looked down at your paper work then back him. "Sure." You said timidly. He grabbed your hand and nearly pulled you all the way towards his room.

"Where are we going Thor?" I asked, "I'm taking you to Asgard." You held onto Thor as he guided you through the gate. Asgard was beauitful. "Thor, this is… you lived here all your life?" You asked. You looked out of place to Thor even here, but he wanted what he wanted.

"Let's go Y/n. I want you to try some stuff here." Thor says grabbing your wrist. He drags you towards stairs. "Where are you taking me Thor?" You ask him yet again. "To try some of our beer." "Oh I do love beer." You mutter following close behind him. Your hand complety disappears in his large one. He's a manmath compared to you, and you're dying to crawl all over him.

It doens;t take long to get to the bar, beer are slammed infront of the both of you. "take a sip dear." Thor voice is thick, and deep. The first sip you don't feel anything. But the second you feel as you do when you've a few shots of vodka. "Thor, what is this stuff?" You ask him. "Only the best for my girl." He whispers. He chugs his beer, and then grabs yoour hand. Are you drunk? No, you're tispy. You're drunk on Thor touches, the way he grabs you like a rag doll.

For the thirs time you ask Thor "Where are we going?" "I'm taking you back to my room here, and fucking you after denying myself." Thors words go strat to your core. It doesn't take long, loud steps echo in the palace.

Thor's door is open, and the door shuts to the weight of your body. As Thor picks you up and slamms you into the door. Your feet don't reach the ground as he hold you up by pressing his body into yours. For the first time you can see his eyes. Blue, clear as the ocean. His lips smash into your. Hungry for something he's been denying hismelf. "Fuck you taste so sweet." He mutters as he pulsl away. You're drunk on him already. Your clothes are ripped off of your body literally. And thrown around the room. His lips are on your skin in seconds. And his cock sits hard agasint your inner thigh. Your whine, and wiggle to get some sort of release.

"Fuck! Please Thor, just put it in me already!" You beg him. "You're not ready for that.' He tires. "You put your cock in me right now or I sear to god Thor. I will walk out of here naked." You threaten him. He smirks at your words. "Don't say I didn't warn you." he as he don't gives you time to get used to his thickens or his girth. Your eyes brim with tears.

But you enjoy the pain as it melts to pleasure. "Fuck Thor, just move already." HE rolls his eyes, and thursts hard in and out of your wet pussy. "So demanding for a slut that can't even talk." He says as he fucks your hard not even lossing his breath over it.

Completed on: 07/04/23

Posted on: 10/13/23

Kinktober 23- @lanad3lreyscokewhor3 @homelanderscumdump @hummusxx@chvnsdimple @vvitzvafflezvv @lokisivy @claud-blood0703 @iliketoreads-stuff @all-that-glitters-is-treasure@clearscissorsbonkgiant-blog @lxonix--ac @piecesofx @mortallyswimmingpainter @playwithfire99 @fucak @everythingneytiri @lovetheos @xxxxxoseungxoooo @durazopato @hotpead42069 @oddseabiscuit @capoda @witching-hour @viviwows @lover103 @alexlovesfiction @katiecat10 @electricfans @jianasmind @max-505 @powerbun21o @the-horny-simp @missy420-0 @jaq-dav @arescosplays

Marvel Master List // The Rich Master List // Kinktober '23

[rebeliz7]

AUGUST - ONE SHOT

August - One Shot

Pairing: Wanda Maximoff x Reader 

Thanksgiving is a tradition that Wanda never saw herself embracing since she moved to the United States for good, but she lives with the most American guy there is, so there’s no way to avoid it, much less not celebrate it. 

She watches the sun rise through the large window of her bedroom, with a large cup of coffee in her hands that doesn’t help her swallow the knot that’s been tied around her throat for a couple of months now. 

It’d be lovely to pretend that time has helped, but time continues to pass by and it only fuels her heartbreak tenfold. 

The more days go by, the bigger the hole in her heart grows. At this rate, she’s certain that her sorrow will bury her before she can overcome it. 

“Good morning.” Natasha’s arms sneak around her waist from behind, her wife’s lips pressing a light kiss on her neck and Wanda’s chest aches for a very different reason. 

Her wife, her anchor, her rock. She loves Natasha, she loves her with a painful intensity that’s hardly ever gone. 

“Good morning.” Wanda smiles over her shoulder, and her wife kisses her cheek with a soft grin on her lips. 

“You ready for today?” Natasha asks her, accepting the cup of coffee that Wanda offers her and taking a sip. 

“I have everything I need. Believe it or not, I’m actually looking forward to spending all day in the kitchen.”

Natasha chuckles, her hand squeezing her wife’s waist before she moves back to sit on their bed. 

“You didn’t have to do this. Tony could have hired a staff to cook today.” 

Wanda follows her to bed, takes the cup of coffee and places it on the nightstand, and then she climbs on Natasha’s lap. 

“I like to cook for the team. I don’t mind.” Wanda shrugs, her wife’s arms slide around her waist again and their mouths press in a soft and languid kiss. 

“I know you do,” Natasha says, pulling back the slightest bit. “They know it too.”

Wanda kisses her again, but no matter how long she chases her wife’s lips, or how hard she tries to make it further than yesterday, she can’t. 

It stops abruptly, the same way it has since the last days of august and she lays in bed, staring at the ceiling and wishing to be able to be with her wife. 

It’s not about loving Natasha because she loves her so much, that it hurts--it hurts so much. 

“Talk to me.” Natasha asks, soft and understanding. She doesn’t push, she hasn’t asked for explanations and Wanda is thankful.

“Nothing’s wrong.” Wanda doesn’t look at her as she speaks these words, she can’t. “I promise.”

“I love you,” Natasha tells her, unprompted and Wanda turns in bed to face her wife properly. 

She reaches out to cup Natasha’s face, and inches forward to kiss her lovingly. She’d burn this world to the ground before considering a life without her wife, the thought is always there.

“I love you too, so much.” She means it, and Natasha believes her. 

“Okay. Let’s go.” Natasha nods, but not before Wanda catches the small frown of disappointment flash through her eyes. “You have a lot of cooking to do, and less than ten hours to do it.”

… 

The Compound is quickly turned into a place that Wanda’s always internally loved. 

Clint’s children are running down the hallways. Thor and his friends arrived early in the morning, even his ex-girlfriend. Peter and his aunt, Happy and Scott are all here. 

Everyone who is a friend and extended family are here, and Wanda’s excited and her mind is not in the same place it’s been for the last couple of months. Her heart feels light, and the knot around her throat is not choking her with every breath she takes for a change. 

“Can I have some water, Auntie Wanda?” Nathaniel comes up, and Wanda quickly wipes her hands on an apron before picking up the boy in her arms. 

“Of course you can.” She kisses his cheek and he giggles, his little arms wrapping around her shoulders. 

This little boy means the world to her, she loves Clint’s children but Nathaniel will always hold a special place in her heart since he has her wife’s and brother’s names. 

She gives him some water to drink and even a little cookie from a recently baked batch, and off he goes to find his brother and sister.

“He’s getting so big,” Natasha says as she comes up and Wanda accepts the quick greeting kiss with a smile. 

“He’s adorable.” She agrees, while moving around her wife to check on the turkey on the second oven, and then moving onto the mashed potatoes. 

Maybe another hour or less, and everything will be ready. 

“You want one?” Natasha asks her, and Wanda chuckles lightly. 

“Three,” she tells her wife with a nod of her head. “And a house in the country where our dog Bruno can run freely.”

“Oh, we have a dog too?” Natasha plays along, walking closer to her again and Wanda’s laughing when her wife’s arms wrap around her. 

“And a cat, maybe a few chickens in the backyard too. We’ll see.”

“I want that.” Natasha tells her, making Wanda’s heart flutter with adoration for this woman. “I’m gonna give you that.”

“I know you will.” She kisses Natasha but she doesn’t deepen the kiss, pulling back too quickly for Nat’s taste. 

“Now be a good wife and help me with this sauce.”

It’s supposed to be the end to a light conversation that they’ve had about a hundred times in the past since they got married. They’ve talked about kids, they’ve talked about moving out of the Compound, but this is the first time Natasha’s brought it up since august. 

Wanda’s heart sinks at the thought of having to leave this place--at the thought of having to leave you behind. 

“You know, Y/N asked me about that place we went on our first date, remember?” Natasha’s voice pulls her out of her thoughts, and Wanda’s heart skips a beat at the mention of your name.

“Whatever for?” She asks, already dreading the answer. 

“She asked Daisy out on a date.” Natasha says through a small laugh, and Wanda drops the spoon she was holding without even noticing. 

“What?” She asks, turning around. Her voice comes out choked up, she can tell but Natasha doesn’t mention it.

“I thought she’d never get over her little crush on you. I’m a little relieved to be honest.” Natasha chuckles lightly, while picking up the spoon Wanda dropped. 

“What are you talking about?” She clears her throat, but the knot is suddenly unbearable. She feels like she can hardly breathe. 

“Come on, detka.” Natasha smiles and Wanda clears her throat again, and decides to check on the pies. “You can’t tell me you haven’t noticed?”

“I’ve noticed.” Wanda says, a little too quick. Her chin trembles, her eyes sting and she has to put an end to this conversation. 

“I don’t blame her,” Natasha says and Wanda recognizes the tone in her wife’s voice all too well. 

It’s not long before Natasha has her hands on Wanda’s hips, her lips pressing soft kisses along her neck, an action that used to be Wanda’s favorite thing in the world. 

“You’re gorgeous, irresistible.” Natasha’s words send a shiver down Wanda’s spine, but the memory of you saying something very similar hits her out of nowhere and she pulls back. 

“I’ve been cooking all day long. I don’t feel irresistible right now.” She tries to laugh it off, but Natasha already has that analytic look on her face.

“Well, you are.” Natasha finally shrugs and when Wanda lurches forward to capture her lips in a searing kiss, she reciprocates in kind. 

“You think Daisy is a good fit for Y/N?” Wanda asks conversationally, as she goes back to the mashed potatoes. 

“Daisy is perfect for her,” Natasha says. 

“You care way too much for the rookies, detka.” Wanda tells her with a smile and Natasha shrugs, accepting it. 

“I just want Y/N to be happy, and this can be the start of something good for Daisy.”

“It will be.” Wanda assures her with a smile that she hopes is convincing enough. 

Tony drags Natasha to a game of poker, and Laura takes over helping Wanda in the kitchen and the minutes passing by feel like impending doom. 

When will it end?

It only gets worse when you sit beside Daisy during dinner, laughing at every word she says and touching her hand every time you get the chance. 

She loses her appetite, and Natasha notices. 

I wanna stay here forever. 

Your words echo in her mind, making her eyes water in a blink. This pain, this heartbreak, is so real that she often finds herself touching her chest just to make sure that she’s not actually bleeding. Or like right now, she runs her fingers down her throat firmly believing that a rope is tied around her neck, choking her--always choking her. 

There’s nothing there, of course. Your absence, as intangible as it is, is real. 

I wanna stay here forever. 

The look in your eyes as she held you close to her chest, and kissed your face just because she was allowed to, told her that she was always your first choice. 

You’re leaving her behind, you’re moving on and there’s a part of her that doesn’t want you to. There’s an ugly part of her that wants you to hold on, that wants you to stay forever in love with her. 

But she’s selfish, she’s come to accept it. 

She has to let you go, it’s the least she can do now. 

She barely pays attention when everyone takes their turn saying what they’re thankful for this year. Natasha takes her hand at one point, and Wanda laces their fingers together out of habit. 

They fit together, they always have. She seemed to fit together with you too, she always thought that you were made to be with her. She thought it that night when you two danced together in the kitchen, and then she knew with certainty when she kissed you. 

“Your turn Y/N.” Tony smiles, and her attention spikes at the mention of your name. 

Your eyes are on her, for a change, and she stops breathing for a moment too long. 

“Come on, killer.” Kate teases you, making you look away from Wanda’s eyes.  

“Okay, first of all, I feel like the lot of you are taking Tony dearest here, for granted.” You begin, gaining a few chuckles and making Wanda smile. “I’m extremely grateful for grandpa over here.”

Tony rolls his eyes so hard but his reaction only makes you laugh, and Wanda’s heart skips a beat at hearing the sound. 

She misses you so much, and so terribly that she almost can’t take it. 

“I’m thankful for you Tony.” You tell him, the sound of your voice taking on a more serious tone. “Because you’ve given us a place to call home, and some of us have never had that before.”

“I’ll take it.” Tony says, trying to move along but he still reaches out to take your hand and Wanda sees you squeezing lightly. 

“I’m also thankful for Natasha.” You continue, and Wanda feels her wife squeeze her hand lightly as you turn to look at her. “I’m thankful for you, today and every day. I know I don’t say this a lot, probably never have before actually, but you’re the reason why I’m here and why I can call this group of very dysfunctional people my family.” 

There’s a little laughter, no one takes offense and Wanda’s heart soars for you. 

“Thank you for giving me a chance.” You tell Natasha, and Wanda can’t help the tears that fall down her cheeks the next time she blinks. 

“You deserved it.” Natasha tells you, and while Daisy takes her turn Wanda tries her best to compose herself. 

Natasha has always bet on you, from the moment you were brought in, Natasha was always on your corner. Wanda didn’t want you to lose that, just like she didn’t want to lose you. 

She thought that keeping you here, even when you couldn’t remember what happened in august, would be enough but maybe, just maybe she’s paved her own road to hell and now she’s cornerned herself into walking that path alone. 

Natasha offers her a tissue, and by the time her turn is up she’s pulled herself together enough to speak without getting choked up. 

“You’re up, detka.” Natasha tells her and Wanda looks up, taking deep breaths. 

Everyone’s attention turns to her and she smiles, or at least she tries to. 

“Well, I’m thankful for this one over here.” She chuckles, looking at her wife and bringing their joined hands up to hold against her chest.

Natasha smiles adoringly at her and even leans forward to kiss her cheek, gaining a few teasing jabs from everyone around the table and making Wanda blush in the process.

“I love you more than words can express,” she continues. “And I’m thankful everyday for you.” To hell with it, she does become choked up.

“Thankful for the wife, I need one of those.” Sam jokes, and Wanda laughs despite feeling like there’s a hole in the pit of her stomach that’s only growing wider the more she’s away from you.   

“I’m also thankful for August.” She says, her eyes finding yours across the table and you squint the tiniest bit. 

“I’m thankful for August too!” Steve clamors, gaining everyone’s attention. 

The conversation changes completely, with everyone assuming she was talking about the mission and never having to answer those shady White House calls again. 

But your attention remains on her and hers on you. The intensity in your eyes makes her uneasy, and she leaves the table with the pretense of checking on the pumpkin pie. 

She doesn’t realize you’ve followed her, or that you’re confusedly staring at her.

“Hey.” She murmurs when she turns around and finds you standing by the fridge, your eyes still unfocused, confused. 

“August.” You speak and fear washes over her, rendering her speechless. “I wish I knew what happened in august.”

She lets out a breath she’s been holding, and smiles at you. 

“I hear you and Daisy are hitting it off.” She comments as she moves to take out some small plates to serve the pie. 

“We’re going out tomorrow night.” You tell her and she can breathe easily again. 

You don’t remember, and at this point she knows that if you ever do, it’d be a million times worse than it is today. 

“Let me help you.” You grab the two plates she’s about to place on the counter, and your hands touch hers in the process. “Your hands are always cold.”

You turn around and leave the kitchen, and she’s left standing motionless. She’s heard the phrase a hundred times from your very lips, your constant complaint about her cold hands was almost a running joke shared in the intimacy of your rooms. 

Halfway to the dining room you turn back around, looking as confused as ever and she holds her breath. 

“Where did that come from?” You ask her with a soft laugh, and her heart breaks all over again. 

This is all she gets now. This is all she’ll ever get anymore. 

…

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

Dirty Work 45

Joyous Walpurgisnacht: Part III

Warnings: this fic will include dark content such as bullying, familial discord/abuse, and possible untagged elements. My warnings are not exhaustive, enter at your own risk.

This is a dark!fic and explicit. 18+ only. Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you.

Summary: You start a new gig and find one of your clients to be hard to please.

Characters: Loki

Note: are we weady?

As per usual, I humbly request your thoughts! Reblogs are always appreciated and welcomed, not only do I see them easier but it lets other people see my work. I will do my best to answer all I can. I’m trying to get better at keeping up so thanks everyone for staying with me.

Your feedback will help in this and future works (and WiPs, I haven’t forgotten those!) Please do not just put ‘more’. I will block you.

I love you all immensely. Take care. 💖

Thor’s large hands drag along your shoulders as he tugs down the straps of your dress. Fear courses through your veins as your head pulses from impact. You blink, trying to see through the dark as his broad figure blocks out any light. You quiver, hands clumsily moving over the dirt, flailing as you throw them up against his stomach.

“St-op,” you choke out, head lolling as you try to shake off the vertigo, “ple-ease.”

“Shh, little maid, it’ll be over soon,” he coaxes as he traces the edge of your bodice, “isn’t that how it goes, eh? You do the dirty work with a smile on your face.” He grabs your chin, his hand cupping the lower half of your face, “give me a smile, little maid.”

You babble as your lashes flutter. Your eyes well with tears as you tell yourself it isn’t real. It can’t be. 

“Aw,” leans over you, “are you going to cry for me? How cute.”

“Please…” you wilt.

“Mm, yes, you can beg,” he snarls, “eh, little maid, if my brother won’t put you in your place, I’ll be more than happy to do his duty. As always,” he sits up again, gruffly shoving your head to the side. Your tears flow over as you quake with sobs.

You grasp at his shirt desperately, trying to shove him off, trying to wriggle free from between his thick thighs.

“You must remember where you belong,” he spits, “in the dirt.” He covers your face with his hand and pushes your head into the ground. You whimper and swing your arm out desperately.

He trails his finger down to your bodice again, jolting you as he yanks, the zipper popping as the fabric slackens. The dress droops down your torso and he pushes it to crumple around your waist. You murmur and cover yourself with your arms.

He hisses and grabs your wrists, once more pinning them beside your head. He bends over you, sliding down your body. He holds himself above you, nuzzling along your neck as you quake. He nips at your neck, pinching meanly as you cry out.

“Please, please, please,” you whisper, “please, why…”

“There once was a little maid,” he snarls and bites you again, “bid to work upon her knees,” his teeth tear at you, “but she would not obey…” his beard tickles along your chest and he sinks his teeth around the swell of your breast. 

You squeak and spasm at the pain. He only squeezes harder and harder, until you feel the flesh break. He unlatches from your flesh and growls, “and as her master would not remind her, it was up to his brother to discipline the errant maid.”

You choke on your sobs, nearly gagging with horror as he swirls his tongue around your nipple. He lets go of your wrists, one hand locking on your throat as the other creeps down your side. He lifts himself, moving his knees between your legs. He splays you wide as he pulls your skirt higher and higher.

You hear a screech. Is it you!? No, it can’t be, you can’t breathe. He squeezes until your head pounds. You beat on his shoulders weakly, heels bouncing off the ground. His hand grazes along your thigh and his fingers flick along the front of your panties.

Another horrid squawk, echoing all around. Then again, and again, and again. Like some distorted horn. There’s a flapping up in the branches and twigs snap in the grass. You close your eyes as you surrender. You can’t fight him. He’s too strong. 

You deserve this. You are just the upstart maid. Laufeyson could never want any more of you than this. It hardly matters that it isn’t him. It’s all you’re good for.

Thor’s fingers dip beneath the thin fabric and scratch between your folds. You whimper and cough. He presses against your entrance gruffly and your insides clench. He prods at you then suddenly, all once, he rips his hand away, his weight collapsing onto you.

He grunts as he’s shoved off of you. A tall shadow kicks his ribs, over and over, several times. Thor rolls onto his back, catches the foot aimed at his middle and wrenches the man off kilter. You hack and huff as suck in air through your burning throat.

You push yourself up on one elbow, watching as the bodies tangle in each other, their grunts and groans interspersed with the sounds of violence. The moonlight leaks in between the branches above and a shadow flits across, a wide wingspan soaring over you.

You look up as Fossegrim dives down and sweeps back up with a mighty squawk, ‘lady’.

You squint at the chaos. Loki’s black hair hangs down as he hurls a fist down at his brother. Suddenly, he’s knocked onto his back and Thor rolls over him, laying a punch into his stomach. Loki puffs and moans, throwing an elbow down helplessly. The blond lands another blow, a mulching crack curdling the air.

You bend your legs, getting your feet under you. Your blood flows hot and your body tingles. Your vision is doubled, further skewed by the dim. You search around as Fossegrim plunges again, snapping at Thor’s golden strands.

You stagger around, your eyes falling to a thick branch across the ground. You bend, nearly falling onto your face, and grip the rough bark. You hear the men fighting still. Growls and sneers and horrid thuds.

“Animal…” Loki bites out.

You turn, the branch dragging heavily in the dirt as you drag it. Thor sits back, just as he did over you. He raises an arm and you lift the branch. You swing it before he can do the same, putting all your weight into the effort. You spin as you bring it down on his back, letting go as it makes contact and slipping down to your knees.

You fall onto your hands, disoriented as blood clogs your nose. Thor’s shadow rises over you and you look up, blinking as the moon outlines his silhouette. Loki pants as he lays in the dirt.

“Thor…” He says, “don’t–”

“Enough, brother,” Thor stomps his stomach, making him wheeze. He steps over his brother as he faces you, “I didn’t know you liked to watch but I don’t mind an audience.”

Thor lumbers towards you, wiping his face as he snickers. He stands over you as you cower, slipping onto your ass as you raise a hand over you. He grunts and staggers, a pathetic squeak rising from his throat as he cups the front of his pants.

You see Loki’s fist unhook from between his brother’s legs as the large man falters and drops to his knees. You move out of the way as he plants his hand and heaves. You kick him, as hard as you can and he falls to his side.

“That is low, brother,” he rasps.

“Don’t speak to me… of low,” Loki stands unsteadily, “if you have any semblance of a brain, you will stand down.”

Thor laughs and tilts his face up, “why would I–”

Loki doesn’t wait for him to finish his taunt. He lifts his foot and brings it across Thor’s cheek, knocking him onto his shoulder. He kicks him again and again. As he goes for a fourth, you crawl to him and touch the leg of his stained pants.

“Please… no more,” you beg as you look over at Thor’s unmoving figure.

Loki puts his foot on the ground as he peers down at you. He turns and bends his knees, squatting before you as he pulls your dress straight, fixing the straps through the fabric hangs loose. He grips your shoulders as he watches you, his face shrouded in the darkness.

He scoops you up without a word. As he stands, Fossegrim flies down and lands on his shoulder. Still, Loki does not speak. He only carries you through the trees, his heartbeat thumping beneath his shallow breaths. You lean your head against him, the last of your strength whittled away.

He doesn’t take you towards the noise of the party. He keeps to the pathways and the trails, following the far edge of the stone wall and up around the front of the house, well away from the lights that shine on the festivities. He does not miss a step as he carries you through the front door and up the staircase, not stopping until there’s a closed door at his back.

This isn’t your room. You’ve never been here. It must be his. He lays you down on the bed as the bird flutters off his shoulder, landing on the high post of the bed. You look up at the blue splotch of feathers bobbing above you.

You feel your energy slake away as the adrenaline seeps out. You stare up at the ceiling as you sense his movement all around you. The open and closes of drawers and doors, the steady, unshakeable pacing of leather soles. 

Then at once, he’s standing over you, a trickle of dried blood from his brow to his chin. His cheek is swelling and discoloured and his hair mussed and dusted with dirt. He sits on the edge of the bed and dotes on you with a cool, stinging swap. You moan as your nose throbs, your entire skull thrumming at his touch.

He works methodically before he disappears again. Time ripples as if everything around you is submerged in water. He returns and slides open the window next to the bed. He shoos the bird and it leaves with a shrill squawk. He sighs and lifts you from the mattress.

Your head droops back over his arm as he carries you from the room. The descent has your head swirling and you close your eyes. You quiver as you smell the stench of dirt and grass on his stained clothing. You feel as if you’re being smothered again. You reach to touch the front of his shirt. He’s there, you’re okay. You clutch the fabric as he brings you out the front door into the cool night.

You open your eyes at the glare of light. There’s a black car waiting, a glowing sign mounted on top. A taxi. He eases you into the seat and buckles you in before rounding to the other side. The car shifts as he gets in and bids the driver to a hospital.

You slump against the door, lights gleaming in your vision. You watch the colours streak by, arms limp as you let the world spin around you. 

You feel a warmth on your hand and your arm is dragged across the seat. Your head lolls as you glance over at Loki. He clasps your hand tight, his jaw locked as he stares ahead.

“I’m okay,” you say groggily.

“We will make sure of it,” he says, squeezing your hand.

“And you too,” you reply. 

He looks at you, “me?”

“You’re hurt…” you murmur, “you…”

He hushes you, “it’s fine, we will see a doctor and sort it out after.”

You nod and let your eyes close. When you open them again, the taxi is still. You let Loki take over. He guides you from the car into the bright lights of the hospital. He sits you down in a plastic chair after you see a woman in blue scrubs. He pulls you against him, an arm draped over your shoulders.

“Ugh,” he leans his head back, “too much whiskey.”

You nestle into him, tired but wide awake. Your head splits and your nose pulses, but neither hurt as bad as your heart. A doctor can fix the damage Thor’s done, but can you heal what the wounds left by the man beside you?

The clock ticks on. You watch others come and go from the blindingly white room. Your name is called and Loki helps you to your feet. He walks you through the automatic doors and down the wide hallways. You enter a room and he lifts you to sit on the bed with the paper sheet.

He lets you go, biding his time as he browses the posters on the wall. You stare at your twiddling fingers as you wait. A doctor appears, he introduces himself as Dr. Ghent, and checks your nose. He doesn’t ask how it happened.

“Ow,” you hiss as he applies a plaster to your nose.

“It’s broken,” he says.

“Be gentle,” Loki crosses his arms as he approaches.

“Mm,” the doctor hums curtly, “if I didn’t recognise you, I might file a report with the PD.”

Loki frowns, “hiking accident, hardly worth the paper.”

The doctor doesn’t look convinced as he continues his work, a hard splint along the bridge of your nose. He takes you through a few tests with a light and listens to your heart. He rubs his forehead.

“Concussed,” he declares, “you will need to take it easy. Both of you appear to need it.”

You mutter and hug yourself. The doctor faces Loki and puts his hands on his hips, “your turn.”

“Pardon?” Loki squints, wincing as his left eye is nearly swollen shut.

“Let me stitch your brow, at least,” the doctor insists, “and I won’t mention the smell of rye reeking off of you.”

Loki sighs but lets the doctor tend to him. You watch, noticing how Loki’s hand shakes at his side. His knuckles are bruised and scraped. His tailored white attire is streaked in green and brown and red. He’s a mess. As much of one as you’ve ever witnessed.

You look down at yourself. Your dress is in a similar state, barely held up by the loose straps, the skirt shorn by the thorns and thickets, burrs caught in the mulched flowers. Your legs are scratched from your foray into the wilderness, your arms too.

“Might I suggest you don’t hike with a bottle of whiskey?” Dr. Ghent rebukes as he washes his hands.

“Oh, you will not see us again,” Loki promises as he approaches you, holding out a hand. “Come.”

You accept and let him help you down. He takes you from the room, striding down the halls but not too quick for you. As you get to the front doors, he stops and looks up at the moonlight.

“We will sleep at a hotel,” he says, “and in the morning, we are gone.”

[michelleleewise]

Long Live The King

Pairing: King Jotun Loki x Asgardian female reader

Warnings: fairly graphic violence, mentions of blood, family drama, swearing.

Summary: everything comes to a head as Loki tries to escape with you......

A/n- a very special thank you to @mochie85 for being my BETA and helping me through this!! Your amazing!!! 💚💚

Part Eleven--Part Twelve-

You huffed, rolling to your back you squeezed your eyes shut trying to focus the pain away. "Well well, we haven't had an escape attempt in thousands of years...let alone one that involved a member of the royal family." You heard Odin's voice bellow around you. Turning your head you opened your eyes seeing Loki pushing himself up from the ground, flipping his hair back you saw a gash on his forehead, red dripping down his face as he brought his hand up wiping it away. "I know of your plan Odin, let them go!" You heard frigga yell as you rolled over pushing yourself up "silence traitor!" Odin yelled making you jump. "After everything I have done for you you betray me!?" He continued, the sound of boots and metal filling the air as you sat back on your knees.

"Everything you've done? You took everything from me!" Frigga yelled as she stormed up to Odin, standing face to face with him she stood her ground, her hand beginning to glow when you saw Thor round one of the hedges, every Einherjar in asgard trailing behind him. "Father, what is going on?" Thor asked gripping his hammer tightly "your mother attempted to set this traitor loose." Odin said taking a step back as Thor's eyes shot to frigga. "Mother, is this true?" Thor asked stepping up to her. "I will not see an innocent killed because of your father's schemes." She said glaring at Odin. "What do you speak of? What schemes?" Thor asked looking between them.

"Your father sent y/n to Jotunhiem to kill their king." She said pointing at Loki "but...we have no quarrel with Jotunhiem." Thor said looking to Odin "h...he told me king Loki was attacking villages through the realms, cutting off trade routes and killing innocents." You said holding your side as you stood "that is not possible I would have been informed." Thor said facing you "that is because I have not attacked anyone!" Loki yelled making it to his feet. "Odin lied, sending this woman to my realm to slaughter me while I slept. Had I not felt the presence of dark magic I would have been none the wiser." He continued dabbing at the cut on his forehead. "I uncovered the plot against me, and found he was also aided in his endeavor by the princess of Vanahiem." Loki said as Thor's eyes shot to Odin.

"Is this true father? Did you conspire to assassinate their king in a time of peace?" Thor asked stepping towards him. "Who are you to question me!?" Odin yelled making Thor step back "I am to be king..." Thor started "but your not king!" Odin yelled taking a step towards Thor "when you are, you will understand sacrifices have to be made for the good of the realms." Odin said looking at frigga. "But father..." Thor tried again as Odin yelled incoherently at him silencing him. Turning to the guards Odin looked at the three of you "take these traitors to the dungeons." He said pointing to loki and frigga and take her to the executioner, she has a date with the ax." He said smiling at you. "You will not touch her or I'll have your hand." Loki growled stepping towards you, putting himself between you and the guard. Bringing his leg up he pulled the dagger from his boot ready to lunge.

"Kill him!" Odin yelled banging gungnir on the ground seeing all the guards point their weapons at Loki. "Let's see what your all made of." He smiled, flicking his wrist you watched his skin slowly change from the Illusion to its natural blue hue. "Beautiful." You sighed seeing his head turn back to you smiling "thank you dear." He winked turning his attention back to the army in front of him as the first guard lunged at him, grabbing the middle of the spear he whipped around pressing his back to the guards chest bringing his dagger up he sunk it into his side, smiling hearing the guard cry out. "All of you stop this!" Thor yelled to the guards as Loki lifted his hand, a green light emanating from it before an army of Loki's appeared from thin air encircling the guards as Loki pulled his dagger free.

Running over to you he grabbed the chain that hung between your cuffed hands wrapping it around his hands he pulled hard snapping the chain grabbing the back of your head he pulled you towards him, pressing his lips hard against yours. Wrapping your arms around his neck you kissed him back with the same force, tilting your head you molded your lips to his, parting them you pressed your tongue past his parted lips, the coldness of his mouth making you gasp as he devoured you when he pulled back, a smile spread across his face as he pressed his forehead to yours. "For Jotunhiem." You whispered looking up into his ruby eyes "for you." He whispered back, quickly pecking your lips he squeezed your hand before pulling away diving back into the fight.

You looked around laughing seeing the guards flailing and swinging their weapons at the hundreds of Loki's that surrounded them when your eyes caught site of Frigga, sword in hand fending off a small group of guards with a smile on her face. "For you Loki." You whispered swinging the chains that hung from your wrists you ran towards the queen swinging hard hitting the first guard in the face knocking him back, continuing to the next when you heard a familiar whistle sound through the air, ducking just in time to miss mjolnir whizzing past your head "Thor odinson!" Frigga yelled as the hammer shot back returning to its owner. "Mother, y/n stop this at once and I will speak with father!" Thor yelled running over to you "im afraid the time for talking is over!" Frigga yelled lifting her arm throwing a blast of seidr at an approaching guard.

"Whatever father has done, this is treason!" Thor bellowed holding his hammer out at her "and I will protect the crown and our people from any threat." Thor said watching her "Thor, you need to listen..." you were cut off as Thor glared at you "and you...we took you in, trained you, treated you as family and this is the thanks we get?" Thor snapped walking towards you "Thor, things aren't what you think!" You yelled looking around for an escape as he lifted the hammer "for asgard!" He yelled lifting the hammer above your head you screwed your eyes shut "loki is your brother!" You yelled, waiting for the blow but it didn't come. Slowly opening your eyes you saw Thor staring at you wide eyed "wha..." he suddenly stopped doubling over when you saw Loki standing behind him, his dagger sunk into Thor's side. "I told you, you will not touch her." He growled pulling his dagger free as Thor collapsed to his knees.

"Loki wait!" You yelled as he slowly stalked around Thor towering over him "my fight is not with you son of odin." He growled at Thor as he looked up at him "a fight with Asgard is a fight with me." Thor said holding his side "i only want Odin, keep your precious Asgard." Loki said straightening up he looked out at the Einherjar, holding his hand up he summoned more duplicates as he stepped back from Thor. Looking over you saw Odin step out from a small group of guards holding out gungnir "Loki!" You yelled running towards him when Odin shot a blast from the spear, freezing when you saw Frigga push Loki aside, the blast shooting her back into the small patch of flowers she had brought you to "Frigga!" You yelled running towards her you dove to your knees next to her hearing her groan "Thank the norns." You breathed, seeing the armor on her chest took most of the damage.

"Mother!" You heard Thor's voice yell, static electricity filling the air as he stumbled over falling to his knees next to her "s..she's ok." You said unstrapping her armor you tossed it aside hearing her cough. You grabbed her hand looking up meeting Loki's eyes offering a small smile seeing him grip his daggers tighter "Borson!" Loki yelled quickly turning away from you storming into the frenzy of guards. Holding both hands up he clenched his fists, a wave of green shot from him sending the guards flying in all directions, his duplicates flickering away leaving him and Odin alone on the battlefield. "Finally come to face me...laufeyson." Odin sneered as they circled eachother "you have crossed me for the last time." Loki growled holding his dagger towards him "let's end this." Odin said pointing gungnir at Loki "it will be my pleasure monster." Loki said, a smile spreading across his face as they lunged at eachother.

You watched with baited breath as Odin swung the spear at Loki's head, tilting his body back it barely missed his face as he spun on his heel bringing his hand up a blast of green shot from his palm hitting Odin in the chest knocking him back. "I expected more from the ruler of all the realms, your getting slow in your age old man." Loki sneered stalking towards him "you think you can do as you wish...damn the consequences!?" Loki yelled watching Odin's grip on gungnir tighten "you took my mother..." he growled throwing another blast at him "you stole the casket from my father..." he said, throwing another at him pushing him back "you took the woman I loved from me..." he growled lowering his chin. Your heart sank hearing of his past love, you squeezed Frigga's hand looking down feeling your stomach turn

"And you dared put your hands on my queen!" You heard Loki yell, your eyes shot up seeing both his hands glowing "you are no king, you are a tyrant!' Loki yelled, the air vibrating around you as Loki's anger turned outwards. You dove on top of frigga bracing yourself as a wave of deep green light shot out from his chest desumating everything around him, throwing Odin back against a large tree with enough force to snap it. "I, Loki Laufeyson...and Friggason." He said looking over to you and Frigga "will make you pay for what you have done, not only to me but to the ones I love." He said stenrly holding his palms put to Odin when movement out of the corner of your eye caught your attention. You looked over seeing Thor stand beginning to swing mjolnir "Thor no!" You yelled catching Loki's attention you saw Odin take the advantage sending a blast to his chest from his spear.

You got to your feet as Odin advanced on him, standing over him with the spear to his throat "I am going to do what I should have done when I found out about you." Odin sneered, lifting the spear you you ran as fast as your legs would allow, bending done you picked up one of the discarded spears from the ground rounding behind Odin "for jotunheim!" You yelled, sinking the dagger into Odin's back hearing him gasp and freeze. You let go of the spear as he dropped gungnir, slowly turning to you his eye wide, a trickle of blood steaming from his lips when he grabbed your shoulders hard. Looking down you saw the spear had run him all the way through, the sharp end sticking out of his chest when he roughly pulled you towards him, your chest meeting his.

"Nooo!" You heard Loki yell as pain burst through your chest, everything flashed before your eyes as time seemed to halt when you felt your body pushed backwards, your back hitting the ground hard knocking the air from your lungs. You looked up to the sky, your heart feeling like it would burst out of your chest when you felt a hand under your head "Darling! Can you hear me?" You heard Loki's voice break through the haze. "L..loki..." you panted, trying to fill your lungs when you felt a coldness on your cheek "I'm here y/n, stay with me." You heard him say, panic lacing his voice when you tilted your head seeing his beautiful crimson eyes, tears brimming in them making you furrow your eyebrows "w..whats wrong?" You asked reaching your hand out touching his cheek. "N...nothing dear, everything..." he trailed off looking up "frigga!" He yelled before looking back down to you. "Everything will be fine dear, just...stay awake for me alright?" He asked giving you a small smile.

"But...I...I'm really tired." You breathed, more air leaving your lungs then entering "just for a m..minute...I'll close my eyes for a second." You said feeling a shiver running through your spine, your fingers and toes beginning to tingle "no no no, keep those beautiful eyes open." He urged lightly tapping your cheek "you must get her to the healers." You heard another voice cut through the haze. "I do not trust your healers, what if they put her back in the dungeons?" Loki's voice echoed in your head "you will have to take her back then...now!" The other voice said sternly when you felt your body float into the air "hold on for me y/n." Loki's voice penatrating the haze "c..can I s...sleep now?" You asked feeling your cheek press against something solid "no, not yet dear." He said making you sigh. "Get her to the bifrost, I shall meet you there!" The other voice yelled making you flinch. "W..why is everyone y...yelling?" You said furrowing your eyebrows, hearing a heartbeat in your ear "no more yelling, I promise." You heard Loki say making you smile.

You listened to the steady beat of the heart under your ear, the sway of your body beginning to lull you to sleep "y/n, wake up!" You heard Loki say sternly making you jump "w..will you d..do something for me?" You asked, your own voice sounding far away "anything dear, name it and it is yours." He said making you smile "t...tell Loki...tell him i...I love him." You whispered feeling your head lull back "y/n!" You heard your name called out but sleep was calling to you like a siren you couldn't escape. "Loki...i..." you tried when everything stopped and you were drug under into the darkness.

@lokistoriesblog @hyperlokilover @iamlokisgloriouspurpose @simplyholl @lokidokieokie @mjsthrillernp @violethaze @dryyoursaltyoceantears @loz-3 @commanding-officer @stupidthoughtsinwriting @high-functioning-lokipath @jaidenhawke @lokiandbuckysdoll @littlespaceyelf @lastlovesong17 @ladyofthestayingpower @homesickloki @glitterylokislut @avoliax @yelkmelk @mayjaysthots @buttercupcookies-blog @differenttyphoonwerewolf @her-glorious-purpose @nate-ate-hate @chantsdemarins @ladymischief11 @usagishira @princess-asgard @honeyg19 @goblingirlsarah @cabingrlandrandomcrap @mochie85 @silverfire475 @smolvenger @loki-laufeyson-1054 @marygoddessofmischief @animnerd @texmexdarling @fictive-sl0th @jin0x0 @vbecker10 @eleniblue @lady-rose-moon @pics-and-fanfics @kittiowolf210 @kats72 @asgardianprincess1050 @crimson25

[deathmetalunicorn1]

Happy new year to you my favorite author, I hope you enjoy your celebration with your family. This is my request for today. Can I request for Odin x reader x Thor smut🫠

-You had never imagined you would be in a poly relationship, let alone a father/son duo, Thor and Odin.

-It was rather uncomfortable for you at first, being shared between the two of them, which they could easily see, but they were patient, willing to let you set the pace on how fast they went.

-You would spend time individually with them all the time, but you always tried to make sure that you weren’t favoring one over the other, which they did think was cute, as it showed your kind heart- the heart they both loved.

-However, here recently, ever since you finally allowed them to take the next step, they had been rather…competitive, if you had to describe it.

-Today was one of those incidents.

-Odin had locked his office with you and Thor also inside, and you were sitting on Odin’s lap, speared by his not only long but thick cock, facing the leader of the Norse pantheon, hugging him as you whimpered so prettily for him.

-Thor’s eyes were locked on you, as he was sitting on the other side of the desk, his hands gripping at his trousers, trying to control himself.

-Thor had pleasured you, using his long and thick fingers, bending you over Odin’s desk, making you look at Odin through teary eyes, begging Thor for release, while Thor smirked down at Odin, as he was the one making you cry out.

-Odin snatched you right before you came, making you wail out in loss as Thor’s fingers slipped from your writhing body, and he quickly had you speared on his cock and he groaned, feeling your twitching walls spasm around him.

-He then told Thor to sit and told you to be still, cockwarming him, as the two gods discussed business, keeping the mood but also denying anything to go further.

-You were clutching at Odin, you wanted your release, desperate for any type of friction, but you had been doing so good, and you knew when you were good, the rewards they would give you were amazing.

-Odin’s hands came to your hips, resting there before he slammed his hips up into you; you cried out, clutching him tightly as stars appeared in your eyes, before he stilled again, bringing tears to your eyes, fully ready to beg him.

-Odin smirked at Thor this time as he stroked his hands along your bare ass and up your back, his touch firm and warm and Thor’s eyelid twitched as you whimpered softly, your body twitching, “You know better than the tease me, brat.”

-Thor immediately stood, grabbed the desk and flipped it out of the way, no longer willing to play, you clutched at Odin, surprised by the loud sound, but Odin just chuckled, “I win- boy. You only get Y/N’s mouth this time.”

-You clenched around Odin, hearing this before Odin pushed you, making you let go of him and he let you fall back until your head hit Thor’s stomach.

-You looked up, tilting your head to see Thor huffing through his mouth, looking hot and bothered as he quickly released his own cock, which was as long as Odin’s, but even thicker and you swallowed, seeing it bobbing in the air, looking so hot and painful.

-Odin grabbed your hands together with one hand and Thor lowered your head down before one of his hands cupped the back of your head while the other encircled your throat.

-You opened your mouth, drooling slightly at the sight of his cock and he smiled, “Good~” you clenched at the praise and Odin’s hands came to your hips, a soft hiss leaving his own lips as you swallowed Thor’s cock.

-He felt your throat bulging as he slipped down and he squeezed just lightly, making you whimper softly and he groaned, feeling the vibrations.

-Thor then grinned down at Odin, “Let’s see how long you can last, old man.” Your eyes widened, hearing the taunt as Odin chuckled darkly.

-You felt your eyes roll to the back of your head as Odin held your hips, pulling you down hard, making you cry out around Thor who winced, feeling the vibrations again as he kept your neck steady and started to fuck your mouth.

-It was hard to breathe but you felt so good, your thighs gripping at Odin’s hips as he thrusted harder and harder, driving what little air you had from your lungs.

-Thor’s grip around your neck was firm but not dangerous, otherwise you would give your non-verbal safe word, a specific movement with your hands which were balled into fists in Odin’s grasp.

-You were getting so lightheaded, desperate for air, but you didn’t want this feeling to stop as your back arched, crying out around Thor and clenching tightly around Odin.

-The two men gazed down at you, seeing your writhing body, feeling you squirm just for them as you felt your release quickly approaching.

-Odin felt you clenching around him, your tell that you would soon be undone, and he smirked, looking up Thor who knew what was coming and his hand left your throat, stretching down to the apex at your thighs and began to flick at your magic button.

-Your vision was quickly turning white, the pleasure building as you felt like you were going to pass out before you cried out, cumming hard, a sharp cry vibrating your throat as you quickly came undone.

-When you went limp the two men froze, realizing you had fainted and they quickly pulled out, Thor tilting your head up as you breathed in, gasping in your unconscious state.

-The two men were very apologetic, after cleaning you up, telling you what had happened after you woke up dizzy, that you had fainted.

-You cuddled with them both, curled between them as you learned, after you asked, that neither won that last challenge, as you became the priority over their own pleasure.

-You smiled softly up at them, looking a little mischievous, “But how will I know who can last longer?” they were quick to hear your tease, goading them and Thor chuckled, cupping your cheek as your eyes turned glassy with pleasure, “Don’t complain to us when you faint again, brat.” The happy squeak that left your lips was the only answer they needed before attacking you again.

[questionableratatouille00]

𝓜𝓸𝓿𝓲𝓷𝓰 𝓞𝓷 7

Pairing: Wanda Maximoff x Fem!Reader

Summary: When her friend doesn’t show up to an outing, Y/n is prompted to make a house call. But when the past comes to get back at them, she has to wonder: is she really capable of moving on?

IMPORTANT: Instead of having the huge warning paragraph here, for this chapter I want to put a little note in. This chapter of Moving On is a lot heavier and quite graphic. Mind the warnings. I will link a summary of the chapter above the series Masterlist link. It will not be an alternate chapter, but rather a summary of what happened in this chapter, without the details. Stay safe and mind your triggers.

Warnings: heavily implied potential suicide, breaking and entering, graphic depictions of gore, guilt, depression, background stucky, violence, crying, scars, yelling, discussions of: phantom limb pain, NON-GRAPHIC past sexual abuse (including assault), cults, suicidal ideation, car crashes, hospitals, funerals, death, past abuse (physical, emotional, it’s HYDRA, y’know?), and there's a slight part where it's implied that the reader is a lesbian but it's easy to ignore.

[ALT/Summary]

🌻 Series Masterlist 🌻

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𝐈 𝐂𝐚𝐧 𝐑𝐞𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐞

“Hey guys!” You smile as you find your newfound friend group standing together outside the cafe.

They all greet you joyfully as you go to stand beside Wanda.

“The only person we’re waiting on is Bucky.” Thor notes.

“He doesn’t live that far away. He should be here by now.” Sam frowns.

“Call him?” You suggest. Sam pulls out his phone, holding it up to his ear.

“Nothing.” He murmurs.

Thor tries. Bucky doesn’t pick up.

Wanda calls, and Bucky doesn’t answer.

You try, and he doesn’t answer your call either.

Clint tries, and Bucky picks up on the second ring.

Sam rolls his eyes, and you and Wanda look at each other, smiling slightly.

“Hey, where are you, man?” Clint asks. You can’t hear what Bucky’s saying. “Okay, well..take care, then.” Clint lowers the phone from his ear, frowning slightly.

“Where is he?” Wanda questions.

“He’s at home. He didn’t really elaborate. I think he’s having a bit of a rough day.” Clint explains.

“And Steve’s out of town,” Wanda murmurs.

Sam nods at her. “Exactly.” He thinks for a moment.

Clint seemingly comes up with a plan. “Does anybody have their address? They live together, right?”

“Yeah. I have it. I don’t think he’d really wanna talk to any of us—besides, I know that I personally am not experienced in how to get through that kind of thing in a healthy way.” Sam replied.

“Me neither. I’m not the best with comforting others, so..” Clint shrugged.

“I doubt he’d feel comfortable with myself. I think it’d be best if one of you helped him.” Thor explained.

Wanda looked at you. And then everyone else looked at you, too.

“Okay,” you breathed. “Send me his address.”

The apartment wasn’t too far away, and you were able to ride the elevator to the sixth floor.

It wasn’t hard finding Bucky and Steve’s apartment, considering Sam had given you his apartment number.

You knocked on the door. Once. Then twice. And then again a third time.

“Bucky?” You said, at a normal volume. You didn’t want to bother any of his neighbors. You called his name again, slightly louder this time. And then you began to worry. How could you guarantee that he was okay? He could’ve fell in the shower or something. Choked on food while he was home alone. Fuck, he could’ve hurt himself.

That thought sent you into a real panic, and you knocked rapidly on the door. Once more, he didn’t answer.

You placed your hand on the door handle. You weren’t usually the type to commit breaking and entering, but desperate times call for desperate measures. Though, how suspicious would it look to break the lock on his door? You’d never been to his apartment, anyone who looked in the hall wouldn’t recognize you.

But now was not the time to think about all that. You expected to have to force the door open, to sacrifice your shoulder to bust down the door. It would make an obnoxiously loud sound and would probably send the neighbors running out into the hallway to see what the hell was going on. And when you opened the door…

…it opened without any problems. You swung the door open, managing to stop it before it hit the wall. Looking into the apartment, you took in the decor. A comfy couch in the living room area, a nice kitchen, a few picture frames hung on the walls here and there. All Steve’s work, you were sure of it.

“Bucky?” You close the door softly behind you. Creeping through the apartment, you find there is no Bucky in sight.

You approached a closed door, which you assumed was a bedroom door. You knocked. “Bucky? If you’re okay just say something. Literally anything, please.”

Your eyes watered when you received no answer. When you open the door, what are you going to find? You weren’t going to be ready to find a corpse. That’s what you were sure of. But what if he was just asleep? That was a possibility.

You opened the door.

You immediately saw him. Or, the outline of him. He was curled up in a blanket, still in bed. You could see him breathing, his torso moving slightly with every breath.

“Bucky?” You whispered.

“Mm.” He answered back.

“It’s 1:54 in the afternoon. We were gonna meet up for lunch, what happened?”

He shrugs in response.

“Clint let you know I was coming, yeah?”

He nods, his back facing you. He doesn't turn to face you, and you shift awkwardly.

"He said you were having a bit of a rough day. Are you sick? Or is more of an..inside thing?"

He says nothing, and you frown. You look towards the curtains, a soft and gentle blue. Steve's favorite color, you remembered.

You hear a soft sniffle come from the bed.

"Are you..crying?"

"No," he disagreed, but you could hear the sadness in his voice.

"It's okay if you are," you stated. "You don't have to hide it."

"This fucking sucks," he laughed, and you could imagine a few more tears spilling down his face. "I mean, I feel like shit. I haven't left my apartment in days, my arm fucking hurts, and I can't even get out of fucking bed." He begins to laugh at the end, as if he's fed up.

You didn't really know what to say. What would Sharon do? Probably send a motivational instagram video, you thought. It made you smile slightly, but you pushed the thought away. Now's not the time.

"Where's Steve?" You asked softly.

"Lehigh, New Jersey. It's a small town, he's visiting a friend, Peggy."

"Have you thought about calling him? He's your roommate and your best friend, right?" You assumed that Steve normally helped Bucky get through his bad days.

"Boyfriend, actually." He sniffled.

"Wait, what? Since when?"

"Since three days ago," he chuckled.

"That's awesome, man." You smiled, stepping a few inches closer.

He nods, rolling over to face you. His face is puffy, his eyes a bit red from crying. The blanket slides down a bit, revealing his scarred chest. You notice the absence of his left arm and the scarring around his shoulder, but you don't dwell on it. Bringing your eyes quickly back to his face, his small expression reveals that he's grateful for this.

"When's Steve coming home?"

"Tomorrow. Around suppertime. He left three days ago, so." He said quietly.

"You should come stay with me. Just for tonight. It'll get you out of the house, and it might make you feel a little better."

"I don't wanna be a bother. You know, more than I'm already being."

"You're not a burden. You're having a rough time, and that's okay, it's human. C'mon, I've got a guest room. You're never too old for a sleepover."

"What, are we gonna paint each other's toenails?"

You gave him a goofy grin. "Damn right. And we'll talk all about boys or something." You laugh, and he does too.

“Hey. C’mon, I’m serious.” You say earnestly after a moment, shoving your hands in your pockets. “S’not just for you. I get lonely.” You make it sound like a joke, but deep down both of you know it’s true.

He nods after a second.

“I’ll be in the living room, yeah? So you can pack up and get ready or whatever you wanna do.” You began to make your way towards the door, and he nodded again, a silent ‘thank you’.

You sat on the couch, which was a light tan color. It was a pretty nice couch.

Bucky came out twenty minutes later, his hair wet and pulled back into a half-up half-down hair style. He wore a black hoodie and some black jeans, a backpack slung over his shoulder.

You smiled warmly, wolf-whistling for dramatic effect. “Lookin’ good Barnes.”

“Yeah, yeah.” He shook his head, but he couldn’t hide his smile.

When you got to your place, the two of you grabbed a beer, plopping down in front of the couch.

“Do..you wanna talk about it?”

“I mean, it was just memories coming up, paired with phantom limb pain.” He explained.

“Drink. You know, if you want. It just seems like a ‘drink-and-talk’ kind of night.”

He took a sip of his beer, and you took a sip of your own.

“I was in the military until, well, you know.” He gestured to his prosthetic. “And then I accidentally joined a cult.”

You blinked, waiting for him to explain further.

“I guess they manipulated me or whatever, but I still fell for it. They were…weird. Always talking about ‘Insight’ and other propaganda. It was just..dumb. I just..needed something to belong to, I guess. They ended up giving me the first prosthetic I ever had. Not this one—this one’s much less…invasive.”

You nod, not sure if there was anything else you could say.

“They had their version of the electric chair. If you didn’t…do what they wanted you to do, they’d uh, punish you. Public whippings, the goddamn chair, more…graphic things. I was the newest member, shit always landed on me. One of the uh, higher ups, had a sex drive bigger than my will to live. Never a fun day for me.” Bucky said, shrugging as if trying to hide how it affected him.

“Then Steve reached out. Kept reaching out, that stubborn son of a bitch." Bucky chuckled, shaking his head. "Got me out of that situation. And then, well, here I am." He looked down at his hand, rubbing his pointer finger against his thumb. “My uh..sister and parents passed away while I was gone. Car crashes suck ass.”

You huffed a laugh. “Tell me about it.”

He glanced to the photo hanging on the wall. “Is…is that..?”

“Oh—yeah. Uh—it’s—well, y’know, it’s—uhm—yeah. It’s—yeah.” You sputtered.

Deciding that it was awkward if you didn’t say something else, you spoke up. "So...you and Steve, huh?"

Bucky rolled his eyes, grinning. "Yeah-huh."

"How'd you know? That..that you liked him?" You asked, and you were sure that you both knew there was more to this question besides your curiosity about Bucky's love life.

"I guess I didn't. I mean, we've known each other since we were real young, y'know. So I guess it was jus' always kinda that way."

"And..how'd you know he liked you back?" A certain woman popped into your mind, with her large doe-like green eyes and soft red hair.

"Cause he looked at me like there was somethin' worth lookin' at." Bucky drawled, making eye-contact with you. You were positive he was being earnest, based on his tone and overall demeanor.

Did Wanda look at you like that? Did you look at her like that?

“Huh,” you mumbled, nodding. You hoped he couldn’t tell what you were thinking. Somehow, deep inside you, you knew he could.

“So,” he took a sip of beer. “You and Wanda, eh?”

“Shut up,” you laughed.

“But seriously! You gotta tell me. Queer to queer, c’mon.” He nudged you with his elbow.

“Okay.” You sigh. “We went to a sunflower field together and ate sunflower-themed baked goods. At the end we called it a date, but I don’t know if that was meant to be romantic or not.”

“Oh. That’s…ambiguous.”

“Tell me about it.” You let out a breath, leaning your head back against the couch.

“But it was totally meant to be romantic. Very homo.”

“What?” You looked at him, but he seemed dead serious.

“Have you seen the way she looks at you? She looks so goddamn happy. And sure, she looks pleasant all the time, but not in the same way. It’s different.”

“Maybe.” You shrugged. You looked at him. “I just…I don’t know. I’m not even sure if I like her. I mean, I think I do. But I can’t tell if I like her or if I like how she reminds me a little of Nat.”

He stayed silent, waiting for you to continue.

"I'm not..trying to find another Natasha--that's...weird. I mean, they're super different. Natasha was older than me, just by two years. And Wanda's a year younger. She's more..bubbly. Like, the best way I can describe it is that Natasha's a deep red, and Wanda's a light pink. Just in like, vibes." You tried to explain. "Sorry, I probably sound crazy."

"No, it makes sense. Wait..what color are my vibes?" He chuckled, but you could tell he wasn't making fun of you.

"Mm...silver. And red. With hints of a greenish-yellow, like old-timey lighting."

"Huh." He nodded.

After a few more minutes, you both departed to your separate rooms. Bucky to the guest room, and you to your bedroom, as per usual. You fell asleep quicker than usual, but whether that was due to the alcohol or due to the comfort of having someone else in the apartment, you weren't sure.

You awoke to the sound of glass shattering. Immediately, you were confused. Had Bucky gotten up to get a drink and dropped a glass? Had something fell?

Though you were tired, you wanted to make sure nothing important was damaged. That included Bucky being hurt.

You pulled yourself out of bed, slowly creeping out of your bedroom. The layout of your apartment was simple. No hallways, minus the tiny one that lead to the bathroom. You surveyed the dark living room, immediately finding the source of the noise.

Your window had been smashed. And in your living room, a few feet from the couch you’d just been sitting against, was a figure. Not Bucky, you were positive. From what you could see, the figure was wearing all black, and sported the unmistakable curves of a woman.

Your blood ran cold, your legs locking up, keeping you in place. Your mouth went dry, and you could hear your heartbeat thundering in your ears. You screamed, hoping that doing so would potentially let someone know that you needed help. And, worse case scenario, that you were murdered. That you didn’t do it yourself. That you wanted to live.

The figure rushed toward you, shoving you to the ground before pinning you there. She slammed a hand over your mouth as you writhed under her. You let out muffled screams and mangled growls, not wanting to go without a fight.

“What the hell?” Bucky walked out into the living room, wearing the same clothes he’d been wearing before, minus the fact that he’d changed from a hoodie to a t-shirt. The absence of his left arm was much more noticeable now.

He quickly peered over the couch, his eyes widening in fear as he found you. “Fuck!” He exclaimed, immediately racing for you. You’d forgotten about his military days; the ones that had clearly set him up with a faster speed and a stronger body.

He ripped the woman off of you, and she let out an animalistic shriek in protest. They wrestled for a moment, before she slammed her boot against his face. He groaned, backing up. She ignored him, beginning to stumble toward you. You got a clear look at her this time. She was wearing a black mask, one built similar to one you’d see a surgeon wear.

She dashed at you again, but this time you were more prepared. You grabbed anywhere you could—her hair, her neck, her ears—and the two of you tussled for a few moments. You grabbed her mask, ripping it off her face and shoving her backward as you stumbled in the opposite direction.

Bucky was clutching at his bloody nose, and you resisted the urge to gag at the red stain that covered the front of his shirt, going from just under the neckline to his chest. You’d seen blood before; you were a woman, and it’d be a real inconvenience to be scared of blood. But the scenario only made your uneasiness worse.

You stared at your attacker’s revealed face, before it dawned on you.

“Yelena?”

She glared at you, chest heaving as she was out of breath. You were sure that you didn’t look any better.

“Why the hell are you here?” You stressed, brows furrowing.

“You know what you did. And now I’m going to kill you for it.” She brandished a knife from her pocket, twisting it around in her fingers.

“What the fuck are you talking about? Yelena, I haven’t seen you since—since—“

"Hello?"

"Hello, is this Ms. L/n? I'm calling from Westview Hospital."

“—since you left me to find my sister dead? Since you left my parents to find their oldest daughter with her face half melted off? Since then, Y/n? What, did you think we just wouldn’t find out?” Her voice steadily rose in volume.

"She was in a car accident, ma'am." Dr. Christine Palmer told you. "We had her in surgery--Dr. Strange and I operated on her ourselves. She's unstable, but there's a chance she'll pull through. We just have to hope for the best."

Natasha, your beloved Natasha, was sitting in a hospital bed. She was unconscious, and you wondered if that was for the best. The skin on her face was burned, stitched up but still seemingly melting.

Dr. Palmer left the room, leaving you alone with her. You sobbed for what felt like decades, before you realized that her family hadn't been alerted. That was up to you. And that only broke you more.

“You don’t understand! I couldn’t—I just—“

You'd ran. It was true, you had run. You'd scribbled Yelena's phone number on the tiny notepad in Nat's hospital room before you raced out. You didn't know what else to do.

“No, you don’t understand! You’re a fucking coward, you sick son of a bitch! You couldn’t even face us after what you did! You didn’t even show up to her funeral!” She shrieked, and then everything went quiet.

You hadn't gone. That was also true. You couldn't bear to show your face after the whole hospital incident. And that wasn't to say that you'd never been to her grave, or that you hadn't left flowers and other small trinkets, because you'd done those things. But you hadn't been there to grieve with the rest of her family. Sometimes you regretted it, other times you pushed the thought away before you could dwell on it.

Bucky had gone; you had no real defense against her anymore. He’d most likely went off to the bathroom to avoid bleeding on the kitchen floor.

“…You don’t get it.” You muttered.

“I bet you don’t even care! You’ve already got some random fucking guy you’re sleeping with!” She shouted at you. “You never loved her! Say it!” Her eyes watered, and you could hear her sadness seep through her voice.

"I did love her! I loved her with everything I had!" You felt your own eyes water as your throat burned.

"Then why did you run away?"

You didn't have an answer to that. Not really. She let out a quiet sob, turning her head to look away from you.

"Because I was scared, Yelena. I didn't know what else to do--I wanted to call you. I wanted to be there, I wanted to reach out, but I was scared. And I've regretted it every day." You pant, tears streaming down your face. “Yelena, I was going to marry her. I’d already bought the ring.”

“You’re pathetic.” She gasped, crying softly. “You’re so pathetic.”

You gave her a nod. “I know.”

“She would’ve never said yes.” She wept bitterly. You both know that that’s not true.

“She already had,” you admitted.

“Ask me later, you goof. You know what I’ll say. But I want you to ask.” Natasha smiled one Sunday morning in the middle of summer. “I love you, you know that?”

“I do.” You grinned. “What kind of ring are you thinking?” You watched her clean the dishes.

“Whatever you’ve already got. You’re not very sneaky, Y/n.” She chuckled. You wrapped your arms around her waist, your chin resting on her shoulder. “But I’d let you propose to me with a ring pop. Not many people get that chance, y’know.”

“I am proud to be blessed with that honor. Now, you want blue raspberry or berry blast?” You teased.

“Why would she spend her life with you? Why do you deserve it?” She sniffled.

“I don’t.” You let the tears pour from your eyes.

“She died because you let her.” Yelena blamed you.

“I fought for her to quit that stupid fucking job. She hated it.” You remembered how much she’d assure you of that fact. But she had friends at her job. She couldn’t just leave them behind. “I fought for that. But she was better at arguing than me. She was better.” You nodded to yourself, resisting the urge to sob hysterically.

“You should’ve fought harder.” Yelena growled.

Without thinking, you let out a whistle just as it seemed she was about to rush and stab you.

“…She…she told you about that?” Yelena stopped.

“Me and Yelena would do it when we were kids. We used to pretend we were spies, and that was our ‘signal’. Then it just kinda became a hello-goodbye thing.” Natasha played with your hair as you laid on her chest. With her other hand, she fiddled with the sheets. “She told me that when she moved away to college, the only thing she could think about was leaving you. She loved you, Yelena. That never changed. She loved you.”

Yelena sobbed. She lowered herself to the ground, too overwhelmed with grief to keep standing. “You got to spend so much time with her.”

“I know.” You nodded, crying yourself. You stepped closer to her, kneeling beside her before wrapping your arms around her.

“It shouldn’t have happened this way,” she lets out a shaky breath. “If I had been there, I could’ve changed it—I could’ve fixed it, I could’ve—“

“Nobody could’ve stopped her. She’d go to work in eight feet of snow with nothing but roller blades to get her there. You know Natasha.” You cut her off.

"I loved her. I loved her so much." She cries.

"I know. We all did." You rubbed her back soothingly. She sobs in your arms. You hold her tightly.

“Goodbye, Y/n L/n.” She whispered after a moment, standing and retreating towards the door.

“Goodbye, Yelena.”

Goodbye, Natasha.

“Fuck, my window’s still broken.”

A/n: bit of a long chapter, eh? Also, just in case you haven’t seen it yet: I’ve got the moving on playlist (Spotify) and the moving on Pinterest board!

[mmimagine-40]

...I love you....

Small thought wirtting I thought I would post.

Warnings: talks of death, very sad!

Stark!Reader - GN , no specific ships or pairings

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"Anyone heard from Y/n in a bit?". Tony ask over commands as everyone comes to an end of the battle. As the avengers where called to an alien invasion attack. They just pushed the aliens back and into space and where regrouping. "I haven't heard from them since we got separated.", Sam chimed in as he remembers the last time he saw y/n. They were both in the air fighting off aliens coming down when an alien ship made them separate. Sam went left fighting and Y/n right fighting.

"F.R.I.D.A.Y. locate Y/n". Tony said as he was flying around trying to find his child who wasn't responding. " Location pinging. (Miss/Mr?Other) Y/n as sent a message to be played over commands to all Avengers , do you wish to play it?' FRIDAY asked back. Tony stopped as he said yes wondering why they asked for a message to play.

Over the commands of all the Avengers. Making everyone stop as they can hear the shaky breathes of Y/n as FRIDAY is informing them to try and stay calm and not waste their oxygen or energy. "..Dad?...I'm so sorry...I messed up. I messed up bad. I'm sorry." Y/n's voice came out shaky evident they were crying. "Please tell Sam , Bucky and Steve I'm sorry that I'll be missing movie night friday....Tell Wanda and Nat, I'm sorry I'll be missing spa day with them this Sunday.....Please tell Peter I'm sorry I can't help him with that project he was so excited for....And tell Morgan I'm sorry I'll miss her birthday and that Their big (sibling name) loves her 3000.". Y/n takes a sharp breath as they try fighting back the pain. "Dad...Thank you...Thank you for everything...Being there for me and believing in me..Even if at times we butted heads..But Hey! I'm your child after all so its no wonder I'm..was .. so stubborn.". Y/n say chuckling a bit. "Dad..we never said I love you around each other a lot. Both not one to really say it...But I just wanted to make sure you knew and hear me say it....Dad..I Love You....". Y/n said with one final shaky breath. FRIDAY informed about lose of conditions and heart rate slowing. Then silence till the message clicked off.

All the Avengers ran tears in their eyes tearing through the destroyed area. Trying to find Y/n. Tony had tears running down his face as he screamed at FRIDAY to find Y/n's ping. All the Avengers running to the air as soon as they hear it. Finding piles of buildings that collapsed and fell.

"Over here!!" . Steve yelled as he noted the color of Y/n's suit poking out under the ruble. Everyone came rushing. Steve , Bucky , Tony and Thor quick to throw the rubble off them. Finding them crushed under the fallen building. Their suit competely crushed. As they where pinned. Bucky used his arm to crush the rubble to get them out.

Tony grab them pulling them into his body as he made the mask pull back. Y/n's eyes briefly looked up at him. Saying a soft Sorry. Tony was screaming as he help them close asking FRIDAY to scan you over. All the other Avengers falling to their knees.

Tony held you tight against his chest. Telling you it would all be okay and that he loves you. Telling you how proud he was of you.

.........

FRIDAY: Scan complete.......slow heart beat rate.....

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..I'm evil I know..this was a nightmare I had. hope you enjoyed the pain too...