#to see someone else's religious figure?) yeah mom i know that post. and then several reels later... a hindu guy did the same joke

[blunderpuff]

my mom is highly entertained by this finnish stand-up comic who is just... literally regurgitating tumblr posts. every reel she forces me to watch is just a mf tumblr post. she's mad at me that i know all the 'punchlines' but it's because i've read those posts with my own four eyes. he's not funny, he's not original, and he pauses too often (for laughter that's not even there) so it drags out his recitation longer than it needs to be

[five-rivers]

Glowsticks

Sneaking in before midnight on Halloween~

This is another continuation of Exhumed.

.

.

.

McGee had talked to several people about the strangely popular gravestone.  What he had learned made him feel sick.  Literally. He wanted to throw up.  First, the person buried there was the kid that had been found in the park.  Second, the locals had made him into a cult figure practically overnight.  

Or, at least, a tourist trap figure.  These people had no shame.  

On the other hand… Didn’t they say that Daily person was in charge of cults?  Did Amity Park have a cult problem on top of everything else that was going on?  Was the cult the problem, the root problem?  If there even was an actual cult…

Cults were dangerous and took vicious advantage of legal loopholes.  Maybe he should call the FBI.  They were the ones that were supposed to deal with cults.  

He took a deep breath, pulling himself together. No.  This was his case.  His job. He didn’t know that there was a cult involved, not yet.  Besides, it didn’t matter if they were religious so long as they were breaking the law.  Yeah.  

“Are you okay?”

McGee almost jumped out of his skin, his hand twitching towards his firearm before he realized that the person who snuck up on him was a kid.  The kid from earlier, to be precise.

The boy’s eyes narrowed.  “Were you about to pull a gun on me?” he asked.  

“No,” said McGee.  

The boy blinked, suspicion still evident on his face. “You’ve got to be more careful with guns,” he said.  “There’s no reason to go for one just because someone surprised you.”

McGee didn’t grace that with a response.  “What are you doing here, anyway?  Weren’t you across town, earlier?”

“Yeah.  So were you,” said the boy.  Danny. His name was Danny Fenton.  “Why are you here?”

“I asked first.”

“You shouldn’t ask questions you aren’t willing to answer yourself.”

What the hell was up with this kid?  “I’m just trying to get a better feel for the town.”

“Hm,” said Danny.  “I help out here at the cemetery, sometimes.  Got to lay all those ghosts to rest, you know?”

“Don’t you think that’s a little much?” snapped McGee. “Death isn’t supposed to be a roadside attraction.”

“Oh, don’t worry.  We take death very seriously around here,” assured Danny.  “But seriously.  I do help out.  The caretaker lets me take that stuff away when it gets to be too much.”  He nodded at the blank headstone and all the offerings around it.  “Mom likes the flowers.  Jazz is making a collage of some of the cards.  You know.  Stuff like that.”  He shrugged, angling himself away from McGee.  “Someone left a tiny copy of the Tempest once.  In one of those teeny tiny books.  Post.  It had that one passage from Ariel’s Song decorated.  It was nice.  I liked it.”

“What?”

“Ariel’s Song.  Full fathom five thy father lies;/Of his bones are coral made;/Those are pearls that were his eyes;/Nothing of him that doth fade,/But doth suffer a sea-change/Into something rich and strange. Shakespeare.  I think it’s supposed to be a commentary on ghosts, but the guy in the play isn’t actually dead, people just think he is.  So, I’m not really sure how to take it.  You’re a detective, right?  What do you think?”

McGee stared at the teenager. The kid who was buried there was his age.  “This isn’t a joke,” said McGee.  “A person is dead.”

Danny tilted his head. “I’m not joking?”

“How are you even connected to all of this?”  McGee waved his hand, frustrated.  

“I just told you how I’m connected to the cemetery.  If you mean the town…  Well, I do live here.”

“Why do Patterson and Collins know you?”

“I know everyone,” said Danny.  He started backing away.  “You should go get something to eat soon, if you don’t want to be late.”  He turned and disappeared in the crowd.  

What the hell.

.

McGee did not go to get food. He went back to the station.  He had some questions to ask Cameron Daily, and he got the impression that the man was the kind of person to practically live at work.  

When he opened the door, though, he had to stop.

“What is this?” he asked, loudly.  

“Glowsticks,” said one of the secretaries.  “You have seen them before, right?”

“Yes, but why?”

As much as the police department had been infested with Christmas decorations before, it was now covered with glowsticks of all varieties.  

The secretary shrugged. “You’ll find out.  And, no, this isn’t hazing.”  She broke a new glowstick with a snap.

“Right,” said McGee.  “Where’s Daily?”

“Cameron Daily is in the computer bay,” said the secretary, pointing.

“Thanks,” grunted McGee, once again wondering why there was a separate computer bay when everyone had their own desks, computers, and, in some cases, additional laptops.  

Screw it, he might as well ask.  

“Hey, Daily.”

“Mm?”

“Why’s there a separate computer bay?”

“Oh, it’s shielded,” said Daily.  

“Shielded.”

“Yep.  No signals, and the Fentons did some pretty neat stuff to the walls.  Bunch of, ehm, nasty hackers.  We learned our lesson, eventually.”

“The Fentons.”

“Yeah.  And Foley did the firewalls.”

“They’re the ones who did the computer filing system.”

“Uhuh.  Kids are geniuses.  The parents aren’t too shoddy, either.”

“The—” No.  There was no way.  “Are they the same Fentons that hunt ghosts?”

“Yeah.  You wouldn’t think it to look at them, but apparently they live off of their patents.  Made a bunch of fiddly little things that every other mass production factory in the country uses.  Also, they own a toilet paper company.  Not my favorite brand, but it isn’t the worst, honestly.  Kind of wish we’d buy it here, but, no, we get that gross single ply. I swear, that stuff should be classified as a crime against humanity.”

“You let the ghost hunters deal with your computer security.”

“Oh, I know that tone. You met them, huh?”

“Just the kid.”

Daily looked up at McGee over the computer.  “What?”

“I only met the kid. Danny.”

Slowly, Daily uncurled from his hunch in front of the computer.  The man was taller than McGee thought.

“Then what’s your issue? Danny’s a good kid.”

A good kid whose parents were allowed to run roughshod over the town, who was allowed to steal from graveyards, and knew all of the police officers.  For some reason.  

“I heard you’re in charge of monitoring the cult?”

Daily snorted.  “You make it sound like there’s just one.”

“Excuse me?”

“Well, after all the ghosts, most religions had to modernize, you know?”

Oh, god, this was part of the tourist trap.  Or the tourist trap was part of this.  Did they recruit from people who actually believed this nonsense?

“There’s more than one cult?”

“Yep.”

“Sounds like quite a job.”

“Eh.  I’m mostly just keeping track of their online activity.”

“So, how are the Fentons involved?”

“They aren’t.  They’re pretty areligious, overall.  Danny’s been almost kidnapped a few times, though.”

“What?”

“What?”

“Kidnapped.  By a cult.”

“Cults.  Gotta remember the plural, man.  Cults.”  Daily was hunching again.  “But, hey, if you’re interested in the subject, I can give you a thorough run-through of this new group that started up last week.  Their philosophy is wild.  I can’t even tell you—”

“Hey.  You’re early,” said Patterson, leaning through the door, her braid swinging.  “Great. Have you eaten?”

“Yes,” lied McGee.  

“Get better at lying,” said Patterson.  “Come on, let’s go.”

.

Patterson and Collins weren’t the only ones there.  In fact, there were more people in the station than there had been that morning. All with glowsticks.  Said glowsticks were being loaded into unmarked cars while office staff and police officers whispered back and forth.

“Did you get the green stuff?”

“Yeah, don’t worry. Gave me more than enough.” Glowing green milk jugs were loaded into a car.  The car McGee would be riding in with Collins and Patterson.

‘Green stuff.’  Was this some kind of bizarre drug smuggling ring? McGee had fallen behind in drug slang, if so.  ‘Green stuff.’  Were they lacing it with glowstick fluid?

Never before had he felt so lost on a case.  Amity Park was messed up.  

“You’ve got the howlers hooked up?” asked Collins.

“I asked Daily to do it this morning.”

“But did he do it?”

“I mean, it looks like it. Are the howlers really that important?”

McGee had no idea what was going on.  

The cars all started off in a group.  Their car was the last to leave and soon peeled off to trundle slowly down back roads.  

“You probably have questions,” said Collins.

“You could say that,” said McGee.  

“You’ve been a good sport about them,” observed Collins.  

“So,” said McGee, drawing out the word.  “What is this about?”

Patterson swallowed a laugh. “Ever hear of the Men in Black?”

“Look, I’m humoring the ghosts.  Conspiracy theories are where I draw the line.”

“Keep telling yourself that. Maybe it’ll stick.  Anyway, here in Amity Park, we deal with their less intelligent cousins.  The Guys in White!”

“That’s not their actual name,” said Collins, glancing back over his shoulder.  “But, well, their appearance fits.”

“Alright, let’s say I believe you.  What does this have to do with the jugs of glowstick fluid in the trunk?”

“Oh, that’s not glowstick fluid,” said Patterson.  “It’s waste from the reactor that powers the town.”

“Don’t worry,” said Collins, hastily, the car swerving somewhat.  “It’s completely harmless!  Not radioactive at all!”

“That’s not what—” started Patterson.  

“You absolutely will not get cancer from it!”

McGee raised a hand.  “You have nuclear reactor fluid in the trunk?”

“It isn’t nuclear reaction fluid,” protested Patterson.  “It’s—"

“Back on track,” interrupted Collins.  

“Yeah.  Anyway.  It’ll trip the Guys in White’s sensors—”

“Eventually,” Collins grumbled.  

“—so we can lead them on a chase.”

“And…  why do we want to do this?”

“Because it’s a quiet month,” said Patterson.  “Don’t want the Guys to get antsy.”

“What does that even mean?”

“It means what it means. You’ll see in January.”

McGee looked between his two ‘partners.’  “Are you trying to get me to quit?”

“Because you’re a spy for the county?” asked Patterson.  “Oh, no, never.”

Before McGee could process that statement, the car’s radio crackled to life.  

“We’ve got a class-3 northbound on Orion at 35 miles per hour.  Ectosignature suggests an amorphiform ghost—”

“Hah!” shouted Patterson. “That’s us!  Punch it!”  She twisted the dial on the radio as Collins slammed his foot into the accelerator.  “Bogey to Redrum!  We’ve got followers!”

“Copy, Bogey, this is Redrum. We need a few more minutes to set up. Can you stay out of sight?”

“The hell?”

The radio crackled.  “Forgot you had the new guy!  Don’t shake him up too much, okay?  Over.”

“Copy.  Collins you catch that?”

“Yeah, don’t worry, I’m taking Pan and Laurel.  The holiday tour.”

“Ooh, good choice.” Patterson held up the radio again. “Yeah, we can manage.  Over.”

Collins went faster. For the next several minutes McGee occupied himself with not throwing up.  He succeeded.  Barely.

“Bogey, this Cam,” said the voice of Daily, “followers are gaining.  They’re on Brassica, just passing High Street.  Triggered the speed cameras.  Over.”

“How many and what type? Over.”

“Three gliders.  Don’t think they’ve spotted you yet, though. Over.”

Gliders?  Who did these people think they were kidding?

“Copy, over,” said Patterson. “Not like those guys care about speeders, though,” she muttered.  McGee could barely hear her over the beating of his own heart.

“Sharp right, brace yourselves,” said Collins, split seconds before matching action to words.

“Redrum to bogey, we’re moving out now, over.”

“Copy.  We’re on our way.  Over.  Head to the park, Collins.”

“Gotcha.”

It didn’t seem possible, but Collins somehow pushed the car to go even faster.  Then, just as quickly as the whole ridiculous thing had begun, the car skidded to a halt in a parking lot.  Seeing his chance, McGee clawed at the door handle and dragged himself out onto the pavement.  

Collins and Patterson, meanwhile, were pulling the almost-certainly-toxic waste out of the trunk and launching it into the glowstick-filled woods with—

“Is that a bazooka?” demanded McGee, so far past his wit’s end that he couldn’t even see it anymore.

“Nah, just a modified T-shirt canon,” said Patterson, stowing the object away again.  “Fentonworks special.”

“I don’t believe you,” said McGee.  

Three – Three things – McGee did not want to call them gliders – raced overhead, jets roaring and wind whistling.  They came to a stop approximately where the ‘reactor waste’ had fallen.  

“What the hell?” whispered McGee, passionately.  

“Come on,” said Collins.  “Time for us to go.”

“Yeah, better to spectate from afar,” agreed Patterson.

“I agree,” said a third voice.

“Oh, Danny,” said Patterson.  “Didn’t expect to see you here tonight.”

The boy walked into McGee’s field of view and glanced down at him before shrugging.  “Couldn’t sleep.”  He looked up, at the park.  “Thanks for this.”

“Had to get them to blow this month’s budget somehow,” said Collins.  “But, really, we should all go before the fireworks start.”

Danny sighed.  “Hope they don’t blow up the fountain again.  It just got fixed.”

“Same,” said Patterson.

“Well, see you later.”

“Yep, we’ve got that wellness check tomorrow,” said Collins. “You don’t have any excuse to forget, this time.”

“Yeah, yeah,” said the teen, waving over his shoulder as he walked straight into the dark.

“What,” said McGee.  

“That’s just Danny for you,” said Collins.  “Great kid.  Super creepy.”

“Yeah.”

“How’d he even know we’re here?” asked McGee, trying to keep his voice even.  

“He did give us that eeeeehhhhhhh—reactor waste,” said Patterson.  “Come on, get up, we’ve got to—”

A small explosion sounded from the park.  

“Seriously.  I don’t want to have to pick you up.”

“I’d wind up doing most of the lifting,” grumbled Collins, who was sliding into the driver’s seat.

Patterson put her hands on her hips.  “Excuse you?”

There was another, larger explosion.  McGee climbed back into the car.

As they drove, he realized that no one had made fun of his name. Not even once.  

Amity Park was weird.  

[whentheynameyoujoy]

Women in SPN—Is it Really That Bad?

TL;DR: Somewhat, yeah, it kinda is.

This is going to be a series of long ones, people.

Before I jump head first into this giant vat of weird toxic shit, let me say something:

The thing about most of the female characters is that on their own? They’re perfectly fine, ranging from serviceable to the occasional flash of thematic brilliance. Barely any of them qualify as “this is hateful on its face and incompetent regardless of context and the writers should feel bad for ever conceiving of it”, i.e. the normie benchmark for justified criticism. It’s only when you put these characters next to each other that a worrying pattern emerges;

Although discussions about sexism in the media were very much a thing in the mid-2000s, as well as shows with characters whose primary role wasn’t to serve a man’s needs, I can’t honestly claim that the flaws of SPN are out of the norm for its time; and

The first few seasons could really do with a PSA at the start of each episode, something along the lines of “A part of the reason why female characters are killed off or written out with such regularity is rabid superfans who couldn’t abide anything with tits brushing against J2, srsly, the writing team and the 2000s’ fan base were a match made in hell, except it wasn’t the writers who couldn’t do with bitching on their LiveJournals about the gall of women to exist in the show, choosing instead to harass the creators and actresses and wives and call them every sexist insult under the sun AND I MEAN WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE HAS THERE EVER BEEN A CESSPIT AS DISGUSTING AND NUKEWORTHY AS THE SPN FANDO—“

Anyway.

SPN has a legacy (as a posterchild for not knowing when to bow out gracefully, but legacy nonetheless) and isn’t watched in 2005 but in the year of our Lord Today. Meaning that as time goes by, the issues surrounding the show’s production retreat into the background and only what’s on the screen remains, to be judged on its own merits.

So let’s run down a list of the more noteworthy and relevant female characters of the first arc, focusing on their characterization, role in the narrative, and end. In the conclusion to this series of posts, the sum of characters will be analyzed as a whole to see if there are any unique tendencies in the show’s handling of women as opposed to that of men. I’ll do this for the original five seasons as the recent finale went out of its way to say that nothing after season 5 was strictly speaking necessary so why bother.

(Also because I died of frustration in season 8 and vowed not to subject myself to any more of the post-apocalypse fanfic era)

Angels, while strictly speaking genderless clouds of energy, will be classified as men or women depending on the apparent gender of the vessel they spend most of the time riding. The same goes for demons where I also take into account their stated gender while they were alive. That’s because although beings like Meg, Ruby, Anna, or Lilith can’t technically be considered women in the show’s present day, their consistent preference for conventionally attractive and/or female vessels throughout the original arc makes claims of genderlessness essentially meaningless. For all intents and purposes, we’re watching girls and women on screen.

Baby—the only true NB of the first run

All right, time to jump.

Say hi to our ladies!

Mary Winchester

Killed in the very first scene to give the story a reason to exist, she remains an active presence throughout the first arc where she has a wide-reaching influence on the plot and characters, driving the conflict on several levels. Fleshed-out more and more with each appearance to be more than just “the dead mom”, she’s portrayed as protective, pro-active, capable, and assertive, mirroring the duo’s desire for normal life and their inability to have it. Her story comes full-circle in season 5 when the personal tragedy of her fate is embedded in the wider tragedy of the Winchester family curse and the overall theme of destiny.

Status: Dead as of s5

Importance: Major

On her own: Textbook example of fridging… and that tropes aren’t bad in and of themselves.

Jessica Moore

Comparatively, if anyone doubts fridging can evolve into something meaningful, Jess drives the point home by having no personality and no point but to prop up her boyfriend before she ends up pinned to the ceiling, the reveal of which is the most interesting thing about her entire existence. At best she’s a symbol of Sam’s civilian life, at worst an obstacle to be removed for the story to happen.

Status: Dead as of s5

Importance: Major in terms of manpain, non-existent otherwise

On her own: A cardboard cut-out, barely qualifies as a character

Missouri Moseley

A psychic and the primary reason why John Winchester even knows to wipe his ass. Appears once over the course of the first arc yet everyone wants her to come back years later—that’s how awesome she is. Has this fantastic trait of being compassionate and empathetic while not taking a single speck of shit from anyone, especially when it comes from the two main dumbos who might just as well have been raised in a barn. Is very particular about the pristine state of her coffee table.

Status: Alive as of s5, killed in s13 (wait, what?)

Importance: Major…ly wasted potential

On her own: As strong a character as Bobby Singer, and as worthy of being elevated to the main cast.

Lori Sorensen

The writers can’t figure out why anyone in the universe would care about Jess either so they insert an intentionally awkward romance subplot to convince people the time’s not yet ripe for Sam to stop grieving and start slaying. The result’s… erm… well, awkward. Lori’s naïve, sheltered, devout though accepting of her non-repressed friend, and sort of on a religious crossroads because of her hypocritical preacher father. I guess the virginal power of her virginal virginity does… something in the plot? Primarily a vehicle for Sam to mark the stages of his moving on.

Status: Alive as of s5

Importance: Minor

On her own: A bit done. Like a bit lot. Like a “could be a trope namer” bit lot.

Meg

Boom, baby!

Arguably the chief antagonist of season 1 and one of the best things about it. The first one to point out the pervasive toxicity of the Winchester family business, so props for perceptiveness. Possesses the standard qualities of a lower-level henchman—manipulative, no-nonsense, and quietly sinister which, while not exactly groundbreaking, sets her apart from the other bad guys in the season as they tend to have no distinguishing characteristics at all. Plus Nicki Aycox makes the role seem more unique and “lived-in” by projecting a sense of understated amusement at the two main chucklefucks. Is one of S1’s turning points in blurring the lines between monsters and humanity. Has a face transplant twice—once to have revenge (good on her) and the other time to pursue someone else’s goals again before getting stomped into the ground like a mook.

Status: Alive as of s5 (?), killed in s8

Importance: Major

On her own: The actresses do most of the heavy lifting. Which doesn’t mean I don’t love watching the character burst onto the scene and announcing the end of the Winchester brand of bullshit.

Layla Rourke

A terminal cancer patient in a religious cult, she’s a more mature take on a Lori-type character and the themes of faith and doubt. Serves as a conduit for Dean’s budding survivor guilt, self-loathing, and sense of worthlessness. Is kind and cheerful, with strong hints that she’s relying on forced optimism to get through the days; also understanding of the circumstances of others while realistically freaked about the possibility of death. Weirdly, she enters the episode already in a state of acceptance and leaves it just as accepting when it’s confirmed that yeah, she’ll die soon. All expressions of anger at the injustice and senselessness are left to her mother which somewhat undermines the “struggling” portion of Layla’s character and renders the final scene where she makes peace with her fate a bit hollow.

Status: Implied dead

Importance: Minor in the overall narrative, major in the episode and Dean’s development

On her own: I want to like her, I really do, just… if only she were allowed to get pissed, once.

Cassie Robinson

Dean’s ex and that’s pretty much all there is to her. I struggle to pinpoint a single personality trait of hers—the 2000s idea of a “strong woman” and “not like other girls”, perhaps? Undermined as a love interest because TPTB don’t show the happy or any parts of her relationship with Dean so really, why should anyone care if two sniping assholes with little to no chemistry get back together? Memorable for being in a horribly scored softcore scene which YouTube tries to convince me lasts for shy over a minute, not the week I remember it to. Involved in the show’s first and last attempt at incorporating the issue of anti-black racism.

Status: Alive as of s5

Importance: Minor

On her own: She’s in the racist truck episode. ‘Nuff said.

Sarah Blake

A sophisticated people-person conversationalist with a love of high art and a deep sense of introspection. Ascends to the state of godhood by being able to pull off pigtails while adult. Bonds with Sam over responding to loss by crawling into a shell but deciding to move on. Doesn’t care for your fancy schmancy fine dining, Romeo. Isn’t ashamed to openly talk feelings which includes her explicitly asking Sam if they have a thing going on (honestly, this is such a breath of fresh air for a normcore romance). Despite being scared out of her wits, she refuses to be shoved into the helpless civilian box after learning about the existence of the supernatural; Dean creates a Pinterest wedding board in response.

Status: Alive as of s5, pointlessly dragged back to be murdered in s8

Importance: Minor in the overall narrative, major in the episode and Sam’s development

On her own: A great love interest that has enough writing behind her to fool you into thinking she’s something more.

Up next, whenever I feel like it, seasons 2 and 3!

[lovemesomesurveys]

What's the most beautiful thing you've seen in the last week? Snapchats/IG stories my cousin posted of the ocean while she was there earlier this week.

What is beauty, in your opinion? Something you find aesthetically pleasing.

What's your favorite brand of potato chip?  Original Ruffles and ranch dip is quite good. Of all the bands you hate, which do you hate the least? I can’t think of any band I hate. There’s bands I don’t like because I just don’t vibe with their music, but I don’t hate them. Do you believe it is possible to know something that's false?  Yes?

Does man have free will? Yes.  How many people have you ever dated? Two. Would you rather do evil or have evil done to you? Uh, neither... Who's better, Britney Spears or Christina Aguilera?  I like songs from both of them.  How many friends do you have? Zero. What's worse, algebra or geometry? I hate math, period. We didn’t vibe. Are you a vegetarian of any sort?  Nope. What's your sexual orientation? Straight. Who do you look up to? My mom. Should art that does not represent anything be considered art at all? Anything can be considered art. Just because it might not represent anything to you, it doesn’t mean that it doesn’t. People can look at the same thing and see something totally different. Have you ever... Literally wanted to kill someone? Stayed up all night...two nights in a row? Had a near-death experience? Been obsessed with a celebrity? Believed a person to be perfect in every way? <<< Only Jesus. Been hated by the people at an online forum? Planned your own suicide? Had an overwhelming religious experience? Fainted? Had an imaginary friend? Been windsurfing? Volunteered for an organization without having been forced into doing so? Wanted something so badly you'd sell your soul for it? Seen something so disgusting you puked? <<< Pretty damn close. Changed your mind about something important three times in one day? Written anything longer than twenty pages (typed, single-spaced)? Read anything longer than one thousand pages (in one day)? Felt as if you could do anything? Taken a friend on a family trip? Attended a Marxist gathering? Memorized the lyrics to the Internationale? Witnessed a solar eclipse? Fallen asleep during class? Been away from your family for more than six weeks? Which of the following best describes you Simple/Sophisticated Altruistic/Selfish Smart/Dumb <<< Kinda smart, kinda dumb. I feel I’m just average. Cute/Ugly Reader/Writer Math nerd/history buff <<< Neither. Into sports/Into music Unwavering/Impulse Serious/Funny Favorite Type of animal: Dogs and giraffes. Word:  *shrug* Number:  8. Music video: I’ll say Lady Gaga’s Paparazzi video because it has Alexander Skarsgard haha. TV show:  I have several. Philosopher:  I don’t have one. Video/computer game: Mario Bros anything pretty much, Animal Crossing: New Horizons, and The Sims.  Sport (to play):  None. Sport (to watch):  None. Living political figure:  I don’t have one. Work of art:  The Scream by Edvard Munch. Month of the year:  October and December. Name:  Alexander. Calculator:  Uh, I don’t have a favorite calculator. I just use the one on my phone if I need one. Comic strip:  Peanuts.

Enemy:  I don’t have any enemies. If I did, I don’t think I’d have a favorite one... Year of your life:  I’ll give you a decade: the 90s. Teacher:  I’m not in school anymore.

Restaurant:  Wingstop. Textbook: Do you crave adventure?  I’d like to travel. I really could use a vacay. Do you wear glasses?  Yep. What's the purpose of your life?  I haven’t figured that out, yet. Do you have moral integrity? Yes. Do you like your family?  Yes, I love my family. Do you like yourself? No. :/ Would you ever respond "Yes" to the question "Are you hungry or full?"  No? Your religion? Christian. What do you care about most in your life?  God and my family. Have you heard the term "Luddite?"  Uhh, nope. Have you ever been elected a class officer?  No. Do you get good grades? I’m done with school now, but yeah I got A’s and B’s. Do you litter?  NO. Huge pet peeve of mine. Just throw it away!  Are you a paragon of virtue? A what? Okay, so I Googled it and it’s a term for someone who describes themselves as being perfect and having no faults or imperfections; often used sarcastically and ironically. I am certainly no such person, no one is, and I wouldn’t even say I was joking cause just no. I clearly have faults and imperfections. I know people who would use that term about themselves, though. What is virtue, in your opinion?  Having to do with morals. Do you have a boyfriend/girlfriend? How long have you been together? Why do you like him/her? Nope. Is incest wrong?  Yes. Do you have a calendar of any sort?  Yeah, I have a physical one and the one on my phone. What time is it?  6:04AM. Tell me something interesting. I got nothin’. Do you cuss?  Not a lot, but yes.

Are you bilingual(/trilingual/quadrilingual, if that's a word/etc.)?  No. I wish.

Are you mentally ill? I have major depression and anxiety. Does mental illness exist?  Uh, yeah it absolutely does. Ever fallen in love online? No, but in 6th grade I had an online boyfriend I met in a teen chatroom lmao. I would say I was like 16 or 18. I shouldn’t laugh cause it’s very likely the guy was probably an old perv. Who is John Galt?  I don’t know. How many songs are on your playlist?  I have no idea, but it’s a shit ton. What's your favorite singer/band? Linkin Park is definitely my top favorite band, but I have many favorite artists and bands. List three favorite songs. That’s too hard. Do you approve of math jokes?  I probably wouldn’t even get them, ha.

How about "your mom" jokes? Not a fan. Are you addicted to online surveys?  Yeah, you could say that. Are you addicted to anything else? Caffeine :O <<< Same. Do you have any anti-technological tendencies?  No. Are you bored?  Nah. Who do you despise?  Evil, sick, disturbing people. If you could cure one social ill, what would it be?  Child abuse. If you were dictator of the US, what's the first thing you would do? I wouldn’t want to be a dictator, for one. Also, I wouldn’t want to be in control in any kind of way over the country. How many kids would you like to have? Zero. What's the biggest lie you've told within the past two weeks? I haven’t told any huge lies in the past two weeks. Do you have AOL?  No. I haven’t had AOL since like 2004. Do you consider yourself a loser? “Soy un perdedor, I’m a loser, baby.” Are you putting off something important to take this survey?  Sleep? It’s 6:22AM, but sadly that’s become the norm for me this year. If you could change the design on the American flag, how would it look? I’ll leave it the way it is.   Why do you believe children like stuffed animals? Because they're soft and cuddly. <<< Would you rather die or have ten random strangers die?  Wtf. Do you believe nuclear weapons should be eliminated? Absolutely. Education? What about it? I think it’s very important if that’s what you mean. Slavery? Of course not!  Do you deliberately cause physical harm to yourself?  In a way I have since I don’t take care of myself like I should. I’ve neglected and ignored things I shouldn’t have.  Are definitions for losers?  No?? We need to know the meaning of words... Summarize yourself in one word.  Blah. Do you have any pets?  I have a doggo!  Ever had a blood transfusion?  I’ve had a few. Who was your first crush?  This kid named Philip when I was in the 3rd grade. When did you have it?  Oh. ^^^ What's your earliest memory? Preschool memories come to mind first. Are you listening to anything right now? Yeah, an ASMR video. Are you a good writer? People have said that I am, *shrug*  Are you physically disabled in any way?  Yes, I’m a paraplegic. Would you rather lose an arm or a leg?  I guess a leg out of the two. As someone who relies on their arms for everything, I really need those. I’d like to keep all my limbs; though, thanks. Are you easily amused?  Yeah, you could say that. Are you socially inept? I’m socially awkward, is that the same? Who's your favorite fictional character?  Eric Northman. Where will you be in twenty years? Gah, I can’t think about that. Do you remember the 1996 election?  No. I turned 7 that year , I didn’t pay attention to that stuff. I was a kid, I cared about kid stuff. Do you remember anything that happened in 1996?  I remember I got the chicken pox. Is it worse to be considered unfeeling or irrational?  I’d say both. What's the greatest sports team of all time? I really don’t care about sports at all. What turns you on/off? It’s been so long, who knows. Do you get angry over little things? No, but I do get very irritable and frustrated quite easily. If you could have one wish (other than more wishes), what would it be? Good health. Do you enjoy hypothetical questions? Ehh, depends.

How much will you accept without proof? Uhhh. Ever dumped someone?  Yes.

Ever beaten someone up?  No. Ever been addicted to drugs/alcohol/tobacco?  No. Who's your best friend?  My mom. Who's your second-best friend? My younger brother. Do you approve of democracy?  Yes.

[purplesurveys]

199

Have you ever read the Hunger Games series? No I never got into both the book and film series. I wish I did read the books though...oh well, it’s never too late to start on them. When was the last time you ran into something? There’s so many things I could run into though haha. I guess the frog that I met while I was taking some trash out a couple of days ago? Do you enjoy dressing up? Sure. I love parties. Do you live in the city or a rural area? In the middle. I literally live right before the city and right before the more province-y part of town. Would you say you have a sense of style? Yeah, my friends have pointed it out occasionally. It’s never intentional and I never wanted to project a certain image, but whatever.

What's your biggest fear? These surveys have made me realize that aside from cockroaches, I am also very terrified of fire. :-( Have you ever been bitten by a wild animal? Not bitten, although I got pecked by this huge bird in a mini-safari because it caught me taking a picture of it when I was 12. Are you close to any of your cousins? I’m close with one. We’re quite older, and everyone else is much younger so I can’t really build the close and personal relationship that I would want to have with them. Have you ever been lost in the woods? Nope I wouldn’t want to do anything that will put me in that situation. Where did you last travel? I was in Vigan last September. Do you enjoy driving? I love the independence aspect of it–my mom can’t ever say no to my plans now because I’ll always have the capability to drive anyway. But that’s the only advantage, really. Driving is exciting for the first few months but then you realize Manila traffic takes out at least four hours of your day everyday just weaving in and out of traffic. It’s ultimately tiring. What song did you last listen to? Tell Me How by Paramore. If you have a job, how often do you work? No job. What time do you normally go to sleep at night? I can’t give you an exact time but it’s usually between 9 PM and 1 AM. Do you watch a lot of movies? I used to but I’ve temporarily lost my muse for it. Hopefully the upcoming awards season will rouse my interest again. Do you like Tom Petty? Never listened to his music. Would you rather have snow or rain? I mean just because I’ve never seen it, snow. Do you own a lot of sweaters? Nope. I only have one and it isn’t even mine, technically. It’s too hot to wear sweaters any time of the year, so why spend several hundred bucks on something I doubt I’ll be able to wear more than twice a year? Have you ever tried rock-climbing? Oh man I always wanted to but was always lazy when there’s an opportunity hahaha. Ever ridden in a police car? No. Favorite decade of music? I don’t have one. I have favorite genres and they encompass various decades instead. Have any of your best friends been your best friend longer than a year? Yes. For longer than a decade, really. The only best friend I had who wasn’t able to hang on was Sofie, but even that had been longer than a year. Ever witnessed a murder? No. I’ve seen my loved ones getting murdered in my dreams, but never one in real life. Do you care what people think of you? My friends, yes. Anyone else, I don’t see why it should concern me. Does your room have a ceiling fan? No, I find it too old-fashioned for my room. Would you consider yourself poised? I have my moods, and that’s all thanks to my Classic Hollywood phase hahaha. I learned all of my etiquette from Audrey Hepburn. Have you ever tried blogging? Yes. I made a bajillion Blogger accounts but only made one entry with each of them. I had a lot because I would forget my username and password as soon as I made my first post and proceeded to abandon them. Favorite television channel? I don’t watch TV. Have you ever lied under oath? No. I’ve never even been under oath. What are your religious views? I don’t have any other than I never agreed with anything that’s ever come out of Catholicism, and that’s coming from 17 years of experience. Are you a romantic person? I’m super sweet in private. Otherwise, in a public setting, I’m hesitant to be showy. Just because I know it would annoy me if I saw a couple who’s a little into their PDA. Would you consider yourself a flirt? No. I never had the opportunity to find out for myself. At what age do you plan to be married? 27-29 should be fine. Do you eat a lot of junk food? Hah.  When did you last go on vacation? September. Are you resilient? I can be. It will ultimately depend on the situation at hand. Have you ever failed a subject before? No. I’ve failed tests, but never a class. If so, what was the class? Do you wear more bright or dull colors? Dull. Wearing bright colors would be very out of character for me. Do you know anyone who has attempted suicide? Yes. What's your favorite quote? I give different answers to this question all the time. Right now it’s, “Next time you point a finger, I might have to bend it back or break it off / Next time you point a finger, I’ll point you to the mirror.” from Paramore’s Playing God. Would you consider yourself mature? Yeah, at least more mature than the wild party animals that are the business students in my school. How many clocks are in your house? Several. I can’t be bothered to visualize and start counting right now. Do you play any sports? Yes. I play table tennis. What is your biggest life regret? This isn’t my doing and it’s not really a regret, but I’ve always wanted to see the person I would have turned out to be if I wasn’t raised in the detrimental environment I was raised in. Like, who would I be if my mom didn’t put me down mentally and emotionally every single day? What kind of outlook would I have if I had parents who had jobs that allowed them to be constantly at home and thus would be able to actually build a connection with us? How happier would I have been if I didn’t have to spend every time wondering if my relatives would nearly attack each other to death, intoxicated? It’s really saddening and I apologize to myself every day for not being given something better, even though I don’t even know who to blame it on. Have you ever been injured in a car accident? No, I’ve been in veeeery minor ones. If you could be anywhere in the world right now, where would you be? I’d love to be in a museum right at this moment. Have you ever had highlights in your hair? Never did like highlights. Favorite fast food restaurant? Jollibee. In what country were you born? Born and raised in the Philippines. Are your eyes more than one color? Nope. Have you ever caught something on fire? NOOOOPE. I’m scared of fire so when I do have to deal with it, I’m careful as all hell. What would you consider your biggest flaw? I’m way too sensitive. If someone takes even the slightest, most innocent dig at me, rest assured that it will stay with me and could change the way I look at myself. What do you think your best quality is? I’m fiercely protective of and loyal to my loved ones. I’d put them first before me any day. Some have noticed that I kind of sacrifice too much in order to benefit the other, but I’ve never seen that as a bad thing. My specialty, really, has always been being there for people. Do you enjoy listening to others' problems? I don’t enjoy the fact that they have a problem. I do enjoy that they trust me enough to tell me all about what they are going through and went to me for either support or advice. Do you keep any plants in your house? Yup, we have several in the living room. What is your mother's occupation? I have no clue. Last time I bothered to ask, she was some kind of secretary in one of the departments of the hotel she works in. Do any of your friends like your musical style? I don’t have a distinct musical style, that belongs to my other friends who give more attention to the aesthetic they put out haha. But none of them enjoy my punk rock taste, definitely.  What are you most looking forward to? Our field trip for our art studies class next Saturday. What was your favorite television show as a child? My first-ever favorite was The Wild Thornberries and Hi-5 with the original cast. Then I moved on to Spongebob, Fairly OddParents, Drake and Josh, and The Suite Life as I got older. Are you afraid of insects? Completely. Are you cold-natured? I’m not sure what this wants to refer to. How old were you when you got your first pet? I may have been 5 when I got my first goldfish. Did you/do you enjoy high school? For the most part, yes. I went through a lot, but the reward from it is that I learned so much about myself in return. I gained a lot of friends, finally knew which types of people I want to build connections with, and I also grew a lot closer with my batch that I will never stop referring to as my sisters. I never viewed my academics as very important since I figured early on that it isn’t going to matter in the real world and in the long run, so I didn’t stress myself out on them as much as everyone else did. My only enemy was the Catholic vision of the school. What would you say was your favorite age? 16 was my happiest age. What annoys you most about social networking? I hate that homophobic, transphobic, and racist people are allowed to have accounts. Are you the center of attention most of the time? Definitely not. What are you currently reading? I’m not reading anything but after this I hope to start on my readings for history class that I’ve been putting off for ages hahaha. When did you last go to the library? I have no clue. April? Are you ill at the moment? Far from it. Do people tease you about anything? Nope. How late did you stay up last night and why? Around 10 PM. No reason. I wanted to sleep earlier but couldn’t, so I watched videos and read articles to make myself feel sleepy. Have you ever written poetry? Only when I had to for English.  Curtains or shades? I have shades, but prefer curtains. How many people have you spoken to in the last hour? Two. Do you tend to text a lot? Yes, but the only person I text is Gab hahaha since everyone else is reachable on Messenger. Still, I text a lot. Ever lost a great best friend? Yes. Losing Sofie was kind of sad, but I got over it quickly. I also lost Gabie for a while. What is your favorite kind of flower? Answered this before. I love all flowers except anthuriums. I’m not sure about other countries, but in the Philippines that’s the go-to flowers for cemeteries and I’ve since grown to hate how it looks. How tall are you? 5′1″ or 5′2″. Haven’t checked in a while so it could be either one. Do you own any guns? No. I don’t have a reason to own one. What would you say is your favorite book of all-time? I’m afraid a book hasn’t had that much of an impact on me yet. Do you think you're living a good life? No. What's your least favorite part of the day? The afternoon when the weather is at its most humid :( Plus everyone just seems to be a little more dead at that time of the day. Are you an over-achiever? Hahahaha, no. No matter how well I perform there’s always someone else that makes me achievements almost laughable in comparison. Have you ever won an award for a speech? No. I’ve gained recognition, but not an actual award. Do you tend to curse a lot? Yes. Have you ever played on the Ouija board? No. Always been fascinated with it. Do you sleepwalk? I don’t. Have you ever slept on the floor before? Yes, I’ve had to several times. Are you a fan of public displays of affection? Fan is a creepy way to put it. I don’t mind PDA, people are allowed to hold hands and hold each other by the waist and such. It becomes meh when it goes too far like excessive cuddling, but thankfully I rarely witness that. I do remember one couple openly making out in Universal Studios in Singapore though. In a line for a ride. Filled with families. I wanted to make gagging noises so bad ugh. When did you last attend a yard sale? Years ago. Do you wish your life were simpler or more interesting? More interesting, of course. What goals do you wish to accomplish tomorrow? I want to get started on a homework for my major, and get more readings done. When is your birthday? April 21st. Which is worse: going blind or deaf? Bad question. What was the best part of today? Eh, it’s been pretty slow today. Nothing so far, really. Do you attempt to stay away from drama? Ugh for fucking sure, yes. I know some people who are still obsessed with high school level drama. It’s fun to watch it from afar.

What liquid did you last drink? Water. Do you ever prefer to be alone? Majority of the time. Have you ever had a deadly animal as a pet? No. My mom wouldn’t let that pass. Favorite Disney movie? Toy Story or Tangled. Have you ever been to the beach? Many times. If you have, how many times have you been? ^ What was your dream occupation at age ten? I wanted to be an author at the time, so not really far off from my present aspirations to work in mass communication. Are you terrified at the idea of weight-gain? No. I actually want to gain a little so that I can fit (nicely) into clothes that I do want to wear. I’m naturally thin and something that people tend to skim over about being skinny is that very few articles of clothing can complement your figure. Do you drink a lot of water? Yes. Love water. I’m responsible for finishing up the pitchers in the fridge all the time. Does your room have carpet or hard-wood floors? Hardwood. Do you take naps daily? Most of the time I can’t, since I spend the whole day in school. Who were you named after? I was told that I was named after the Swedish singer also named Robyn, but my parents’ versions change EVERY TIME I bring the question up. I have no idea why they can’t give me a straight answer. Do you plan on traveling this spring or summer? Yes if my dad happens to be home at that time of the year. Do you know anyone who is colorblind? I don’t think so. Have you ever been a teacher's pet? Ugh no. I stay away from that particular spotlight. What is your absolute favorite hobby? Exploring museums and other cultural sites :) I also love watching movies. How many times a day do you brush your teeth? Once. Twice at most. Ever been to a tanning bed before? No. I have no use for one and I don’t even know how to operate them, and I’ve seen the tanning bed part from Final Destination 3 enough times to know not to mess with them haha. Are you satisfied with your financial stability? I’m alright with my parents’ financial stability. Who is your favorite actor/actress? Kristen Stewart. I also like Kate Winslet but she’s in my shit list for now because she defended Woody Allen.

Are your nails painted? They aren’t. What's the meanest thing you've ever said to someone? When I was a kid, around 9, I used to tell my siblings all the time that I wish they were never born and that I were an only child instead, since I was always fighting with them for attention. I wasn’t raised a brat and I hate that I ever said that, and it’s really because of the environment I was raised in. I heard those words from my relatives and other people, and I just mimicked it because I thought it was an alright thing to say. Do you ever accidentally talk to inanimate objects? Yeah I say sorry ALL THE TIME to inanimate objects I bump into. What's your favorite flavor of ice cream? Cookies and cream and any flavor with an unusual concept. I tried spicy chocolate ice cream before, best thing ever. Have you ever kissed someone of the same gender? I would prefer to kiss somone of the same gender. Do you receive any hate mail? No. I got hate stuff on my Ask.fm once and since I don’t tolerate negativity on any of my social media, I went ahead and deleted my profile altogether. Have you ever sent a letter in the mail? Nope. If you could, would you have a pen pal? That seems sweet, but no. What color are the pants you're wearing? My shorts are blue. Have you ever had a stalker? I haven’t. What is your life philosophy? People don’t have to be blood to be family. Who last sent you a goodnight text message? My girlfriend. Do you own any clothes that are your favorite color? I have lots of black clothes; but as much as I love pastel pink, I have nothing of that color. Have you ever been in a hot tub before? Of course. What's your favorite comedy movie? White Chicks hahahahahahah.

[marisatofu-blog]

Well well well…I’m back!

In case you forgot about me, I’m still here!

It’s been a long while since I last posted! It’s kind of nice to give my perfectionism a break from reading and re-reading my blogs over and over again to make sure my grammar is spot on.  I have quite a few pet peeves when it comes to grammar…but even I know I’m not perfect all the time. (Like you should know the difference between ‘their’ and ‘there’, ‘than’ and ‘then’ or ‘our’ and ‘are’…but I’ll still forgive you if you don’t :) haha)

To get to the point, ’cause you’re probably like “What has this girl been up to lately?”. Well my friends, I had a glorious, month long visit home! Our (Ryan and myself) departure was December 23; so up until that point I was listening to Christmas music as often as I could…and Ryan judged me majorly for this. We both needed to pack up the apartment we were living in (because we’re moving soon!!) and I had all the songs on repeat. Thankfully he put up with me and my insane Christmas cheer :D (and I love him even more for it).

China doesn’t really decorate around Christmas time, (well, the city we were in doesn’t) so I can still remember the feeling of  excitement I had to go home and see the Christmas tree my mom decorated, or just any decorations. Or to smell the homey Christmas candles….ahhhh. Also I was really pumped for all the snow! Weird right? Everyone seems to dread the snow, but I was welcoming it with open arms. In fact, just the other night I missed the sound of a snow plow going by. So strange…But the main reason for my excitement was just to be with my friends and family to celebrate the holidays. I mean that’s what the holidays are all about, right!?

Right?

Well, I feel like presents are such an expected thing around Christmas-time, or even for birthdays, anniversaries, Valentine’s Day…okay a lot of days. Kids (well most kids) aren’t afraid to show their expectations/excitement when it comes to presents. I personally remember a time when it was my 9th birthday (or around that..okay it was last year you guys! ahah kidding) and my parents got me a stuffed animal.  I didn’t want a stuffed animal…pshhh. I was too mature for that (meanwhile I tucked in all of my 7 stuffed animals into bed every night)….But I was definitely a child that loved gifts.

But as adults I feel like we hide it, as we often do our emotions. “Oh you didn’t have to get me anything!”. Meanwhile, if you have a birthday party and no one brings you a gift at all, are you slightly disappointed? Or lets say it’s your anniversary and your special someone doesn’t get you a gift. My guess is that your inner, immature self would be throwing a tantrum; if you had even a shred of hope that someone would bring you a gift. BUT if you’re like, an amazing human being and just cherish the company of others, kudos to you. You are awesome.

And this year, I’m joining that awesome club! I feel like this year I truly cared less about gifts. Seriously. This year I didn’t care what I got, or if I even got anything. I was truly happy to be home with friends and family to just spend my time with them (not that I didn’t appreciate the gifts I got!!). And I know you’re like “yeah sureeee she cares about her family this much”…

I DO. With all my heart I would do anything for every single one of them. They’re all a bit loud, fun, weird, and different…and sometimes a bit moody (okay that’s me on low sleep). But they’re all amazing (I guess I’ll put myself in that category as well…hehe..I mean blood relation you know, I have to have it too!). And boy was it nice to be home!! I arrived home safely, and Ryan, after having our flight delayed, rushing to his connection flight, only to have that delayed an hour, meanwhile having zero sleep on a 14 hour flight, reached Florida safe for his family holidays. For me, as usual, my arrival was on a Friday night pizza night, and my mom saw me at the door and welcomed me with a big hug. I walked in and saw my dad with our very close family friend (again, hugs all around), and I of course got to see my BABIES.

These two little ones…

They steal my heart every time. It melted my heart when they came to cuddle. I feel like they know who I am, but who really knows with cats. They definitely weren’t jumping up and down when they saw me, as most dogs do (they would run you over). But my cats behaved much like cats (surprise surprise) and did that cool cat walk like “Hey…what’s up? Come here often?” just to rub it in my face that I haven’t been around, making me feel bad for leaving them :(

I remember Ryan suggesting at one point to go to Toronto to meet up with friends, and I didn’t want to go because I wanted to spend as much time as possible at home. Even if no one was home because they had to do their regular day things, I just wanted to be at home and cuddle my cats….which I mean, judge me however you like (crazy cat lady, crazy animal lady), but I just wanted to smoosh them as much as possible. (We did end up going to Toronto by the way and it was a blast!)

So at this point you’re probably thinking “Okay, your entire time home did not involved just smooshing your cats…”

You’re right.Let me get to the more interesting parts of the holidays.

Florida New Years

This New Years was a big deal to me you guys. I feel like most New Years I end up staying in and watching the ball drop on TV with whoever else I’m celebrating with. Which, yes, it’s about the company and whatnot, BUT I seriously wanted to get out and do something fun for New Years….Okay last year I celebrated New Years in Thailand with some pretty awesome people (Ryan’s family), so that was amazing. But most new years I tend to spend indoors at my own fault. Sometimes you gotta make your own fun!

So, this year I did my research and figured out what Ryan and I could do in Florida. I booked us a hotel, a restaurant reservation, and mapped out where we would go afterwards. Perfect! We were not going to have a boring New Years.

My flight arrived in Florida the evening of December 30, and we drove to Fort Myers on the 31 to get to the hotel and get ready for our evening.

Views from the sky!

Here’s what the night looked like:

Followed by this:

And then this:

So we had our lovely dinner and we walked around Fort Myers to celebrate with everyone around. This was really cool because there were multiple streets shut down just for people to walk around, drink, and listen to the handful of bands dispersed throughout. As well, a part was sectioned off for the ball drop. All through the night we were able to order alcohol from the booths stationed outside, and that’s when Ryan noticed the Jell-O syringes. Yes…they were actually in a syringe!

I don’t remember exactly how many I had, but I remember hating the taste of them; but yet with peer pressure from Ryan I continued to have them anyway (notice the whipped cream on top; it wasn’t totally awful). I just remembering shuddering every time from the nasty flavour, and having to chase it with beer.

As the night went on, the streets got more crowded and I started feeling like I was back in China, but at this point I already had enough alcohol in me that I didn’t really care about my surroundings. Don’t worry, I didn’t do anything inappropriate! But when we were waiting for the ball to drop, which was blocked off by moveable fencing, there was an interesting security guard watching ‘his area’ (by moveable I mean someone has to physically move it…it can’t move on it’s own!). Ryan and I had our hands on the fence, just chatting away, minding our own business when the security guard comes over and tells us to take our hands off the bar. I didn’t realize a resting hand could do so much damage to a fence! We kept watching him and he continued to do this for anyone, even if they just rested their foot on it, or any body part for that matter. Well, I was feeling pretty rebellious so I kept my hand on their anyways. I showed you Mr. Security Guard!!

…and then he came over and pushed me, and Ryan got in a fight and that was the end of our evening.

Just kidding! But wouldn’t that be interesting!

That really was the extent of my rebelliousness though…nothing happened. (I know, why can’t I be more rebellious just for the purpose of this blog??)

Later on in the night more ‘fun’ people came out from wherever they were hiding. This included a group of super interestingly religious people;  they announced to everyone continuously via loud-speaker, that everyone around Fort Myers was going to hell. Just the kind of vibes people want around New Years right?! I remember seeing some people going up and trying to hug this one particular speaker, to try and show him some compassion. Instead he said “What are you doing, do not touch me, I said to not touch me. Please stop touching me. You’re all going to hell”. This guy was dead serious. Some others went up and explained their own religious views, but this group still put them down for going out and celebrating New Years Eve. I really had no idea religious people weren’t allowed to go out, drink or have fun. All I know is, I wont be joining that religious group (and I probably wouldn’t even be allowed!).

When it got closer to midnight,  Ryan and I gathered with everyone else around the ball drop area. And as you might imagine New Years being between couples…well yeah it was darn cute. And if you’re single, you’d probably kiss that random stranger or hug a good friend…or all of the above if you’re really having a good time!

A really blurry photo shortly after midnight by the ball drop!

I however stuck with Ryan, and we continued to have a good time by going into a nearby bar. The place was huge, with lights flashing, people dancing and the music vibrating through the walls. I decided (like a kid) to follow the bright flashing lights upstairs. With alcohol in my system I tend to be a bit more curious than normal, and Ryan tagged along. Once we got upstairs, the room opened up to a less busy of a bar with several couches placed throughout, and people dancing to the music between them. I remember seeing the couch and was like “Oh that’s nice, I’ll just sit down for a bit”. I at that point hadn’t sat all evening and my feet were tired. Suddenly, a husky security guard comes over and says “This is VIP! Get out!”, and as we jump out of our seats we hear one of the guys from VIP say “No it’s okay, they can stay”. I should have figured out it was the VIP section before I sat down, based on the environment, but my situational awareness wasn’t the best. So Ryan and I were sitting there and this guy didn’t even tell us his name, he just said “Yeah I’m a football player. We’re all football players up here, and this is our section. But it’s cool if you want to stay”. My mind was at first like “Ooookay football player with no name”, and then thought “I know he wants us to be blown away by his sheer amazing-ness, but what’s his name again?”. In my mind, your name is more important than your occupation, but I think he thought opposite. So to make him feel more special, here was my reaction: “NO WAY! WOW. THAT IS SO COOL! Oh my gosh. This is crazy. No we should leave! We’re sooooo sorry”. In which case he was like “No, no you guys can say”. Then Ryan and I looked at each other and are like…crap, now we owe him/them something. We have to buy them all drinks, and I don’t know that we have that much money left! (I also don’t know if I can worship them that much longer…). So I asked some of the guys and girls around what they wanted and Ryan and I waited at the bar for a bartender when Ryan said,  “I just really want to get out of here”. Smart cookie Ryan is!  So, we literally bought zero drinks and just walked out of the building, not even saying goodbye to anyone.

Poor football players were probably wondering where their rum and coke’s were at!

At this point it was getting late and we decided to walk back to our hotel, which was about a 20 minute walk. We had stopped in at a gas station to pick up some food and refreshments and next thing you know, it’s morning and we were in the hotel. I was laying on the bed, on top of the covers with my clothes from the previous night on….we made it back to the hotel??

I turned over to make sure I made it back with Ryan, and saw him on the other  double bed. I tried get up to go to the bathroom but my head was pounding, and the room was spinning. I finally forced myself to the bathroom because my bladder couldn’t take it anymore, and as I was washing my hands I regretfully looked at myself in the mirror. You can use your imagination to picture how good I looked just then. (hint hint: amaaaaazing). I drank some water, and very, very slowly walked back to bed.

Checkout was at noon, so of course we needed to get out of the hotel, but I was in no state of wanting to live.

I tried to pack up some of my things when I had to suddenly run to the bathroom to puke….ugh. I tried again…and puke again. Then we made it to the checkout, I looked like a mess and didn’t even want to talk, so I let Ryan handle it. We decided to grab something at Dunkin’ Donuts before we drove back, but I couldn’t even look at food, or coffee…not even Ryan because the sun was reflecting off his magnificent white skin.

Ha! Just kidding. He’s no vampire. Anyways, Ryan ordered something at Dunkin’ Donuts and I sat there, slumped in my chair with my eyes closed, waiting, and hoping not to throw up again. After he was done, we made it to the car and Ryan pulled out of the parking spot when a wave of nausea hit me again. He pulled back in the spot and I quickly got out, thinking I was going to puke, but it was a false alarm. Thank goodness Ryan’s mom had the travel sickness bags in the car; what a smart lady! I got back in and took the bag out just in case, and ended up falling asleep. We finally got back to the condo, with no accidents in the car (yay!), but as I got out of the car and can you guess what happens next?! Yepp…I threw up again. Ryan left me to do my business each time because he couldn’t handle it, which I totally get! Who wants to see that. But the plus side of this situation is that Ryan complimented me on how quiet I am when I throw up. Sooooo I’ll add that to my resume!

Anyways, the whole day I felt like crap. I was willing myself to feel better because I saw how beautiful of a day it was. I just wanted to be out in the sun, and I only had a few days left in Florida! But no matter how hard I tried, I never did get to sit out in the sun that day. I made my New Years Resolution to never drink again (as if a year is that quick to get through)….but I’ve broken that promise several times since! But New Years was a blast with Ryan and SO memorable, and that’s all I really wanted. I would go back and do that again another year, just minus the Jell-O syringes. Bleh.

Me the day after New Years: recovering all day

I was able to get to the beach a few days, and was it ever nice!!

Post New Years Adventures

Pretty much every weekend after getting home from Florida, we spent staying up late and having fun. I have to say, Ryan did really well in this area. Ryan’s dad has this saying that nothing good happens after midnight; but I would say for Ryan that nothing good happens after 5am.

There was the one pizza night when everyone was over, being all loud and having a good time. One person we were extra happy to have around because he doesn’t make it to pizza nights as often anymore; my brotha from anotha motha, Eric. Actually though he is like another brother, since my family grew up with his just 2 houses down the road. Anyways, it was getting late and I was super tired that night so I decided to head to bed early. Ryan and Eric however stayed up until 6AM!! Like a little kid on Christmas morning, Ryan came into my room and excitedly woke me up to tell me that we’re going out for breakfast at 7am. They wanted to keep the day rolling, and I was their ride to breakfast. I negotiated with Ryan that 7:30 would be better, but when that time came around Ryan didn’t wake me up. 8:30 came around and still I heard nothing.  So I went downstairs to where the guys were last, and I see the them both sleeping away like little angels (okay maybe some snoring was involved). When they finally woke up they were both still drunk, and they knew breakfast was off, especially since Eric had to be somewhere for noon.

The next really fun time of Ryan waking me up was when he went out with my brother and his girlfriend to celebrate their friends birthday. (PS. do you notice this pattern of me not staying up late and drinking?? I learned something from New Years!) We had just gotten home from my grandma’s 80th birthday around midnight, and they were ready to party! Rico and Ryan had some shots before I dropped them off downtown, and I told them to text me if they needed a ride. I even stayed up late to wait for a text, but received no response. SO I got a lovely call at 5am, and I don’t even remember what Ryan said because I was pretty much still asleep. In my half asleep state, I went downstairs and saw Rico propping Ryan up and trying to open the door at the same time. I at first was like “Okay…they’re just really close now”. Then I finally, really woke up and because something about it didn’t look right. Finally Ryan bursts out “I broke my ankle!!” He’s drunk, and Rico’s giving me a smile like “Geez I dunno what happened…yeah it was stupid”. Confused with how he could possibly break his ankle, I respond “What?? Are you okay? What happened??”. I swear I didn’t hear the full story of what happened until the next day (I did not get much information out of the drunk Ryan).

Here’s the story:

Everyone goes out to the bar, has a great time, Ryan’s not drunk

Bar closes, everyone Uber’s to the birthday girls’ house, Ryan’s not drunk

Birthday girls’ family (and Rico’s girlfriends’ cousins) arrive, Ryan’s not drunk

The family brings out the real alcohol, people start dancing in the living room, Ryan’s drunk

Shots, shots, more shots, Ryan’s really drunk

Deep conversations, heart to hearts, still drunk

More shots….still really drunk

Time to go home, Rico and Ryan have the brilliant idea of walking..still drunk

What’s that Ryan see’s? A really tall shed you say?….still drunk

Ryan parkour’s to the top of the shed and proceeds to jump down (stupid, stupid idea…really drunk)

Ryan lands…and voila! He can’t really walk (maybe a bit more alert, but still drunk)

Rico somewhat carries Ryan home

Ryan calls Marisa

So yes, Ryan jumped off a very tall shed in a random person’s backyard, and seriously messed up his ankle. Rico said he was just walking along, and the next thing he knows Ryan brings out his inner monkey and is climbing on a fence towards a shed, gets onto the roof, and jumps off, landing flat on his feet. Okay there Mr. Hulk! (Except instead of him shattering the ground beneath him, the ground shatter him) Something in his ankle must have cracked, or fractured…we still don’t know. My biggest worry at the time was that we were leaving for China the next day and I was wondering how I would get him through the airport with all the luggage we had. Also I have yet to see any people in wheelchairs in China, and there was no way I could carry Ryan the whole way through.

If you’re wondering what’s up with Ryan’s ankle now, we still don’t really know. It was, and is still sometimes painful to watch him walk. On the day of our departure, my dad was able to find some crutches for Ryan to use. Thanks dad! I didn’t have to end up carrying Ryan after all!

Overall the trip home was a blast; we made the most of our days home and spent as much time with people we knew we wouldn’t see anytime soon. Going away has made me appreciate those important people in my life even more; I often randomly think of people from home and sometimes feel like crying! But crying from missing friends and family has subsided a lot, compared to when I initially got here. Sometimes I have the opposite reaction and feel like bursting out laughing, which is equally as funny. The longer I stay, the easier it gets.

Some other memories from my visit home:

Skiing at Blue Mountain with my dad and family friend

More cuddles

Going for a nice hike, full of smog-free air!

Got my Italian passport!!

Axe throwing competition

Being home always creates warm memories for me; I laugh uncontrollably at least once a day, and I feel surrounded by great people.  My brother, for example, has an awesome humour that can make me laugh non-stop for about 5 minutes from just a silly noise.

Which brings me to a 1.5 hr  Christmas Eve drive home from my grandparents; my brother was driving, and everyone else in the vehicle had been drinking. We listened to all sorts of music, had some good talks, and Rico did insanely good voice impressions of an old Japanese man, an Australian, and Hermione Granger from Harry Potter (pretty much just sounded like Mrs. Doubtfire). It was the Japanese man that got everyone in the car gasping for air; and I had to tell Rico to stop because I was concerned my sister was going to pass out. If we sound like an insanely happy family, I’d say for the most part, we are :D (We’re probably truly insane, but also happy at the same time) And I’m so glad Ryan has joined in on our crazy train; I remember when he first met everyone, his facial expression was like “What kind of water are these people drinking?!”

Anyways folks, as always, thanks for taking the time to read my blogs (even if they can be a tad long), and listening to how awesome the people in my life are. Going home is bound to create some good memories, but I’m also loving my life here in China. We’ve met some pretty cool people from America that will unfortunately be leaving us soon to go back home. However, this coincides well with Ryan and I moving to Chongqing within the next week or so! I’m SO excited to move. Until then, I hope you’re all enjoying your 2017 so far. If you’re not, come visit us in China, it’ll change the way you think!

Coming up: The move to Chongqing

Next trip:  Vietnam

One Wild Month Well well well...I'm back! In case you forgot about me, I'm still here! It's been a long while since I last posted!