#to my friend ill answer soon
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Gonna be 25 soon and all that I did was find out that I may have pcos 💀
#wELP at least I’m getting answers to what’s been concerning me since may#and it’s either that or some hormonal imbalance apparently but I have an ultrasound scheduled mid November#so I should get solid answers soon#but what made it funnier is when I told my friends we were laughing about how we all have either pcos or endometriosis#like damn the odds really said y’all are gonna be a little too in sync with each other and ya problems#but seriously getting slapped with some medical issues ontop of struggling with job hunting ain’t fun#LORD PLEASE JUST SEND ME SOMETHING FUCKING GOOD#I SWEAR ILL START GOING TO CHURCH MORE
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hello, my angels; for those of you who still hanging around and haunting me like the sweetest ghost; thank you. i fucking love you. also, no more terrible or frightening news; i promise! still tumored, but...good humored abt it, i think? sorry to disappear on all of you;
( side note: -- thank you so, so much for your asks; when i am sad, the way that i was, they always comfort me endlessly and help me remember that you mean more than the sum or your parts, y'know?
just...please know, i am very excited to sit down in a little while and answer some -- thank you for leaving them even if it feels like you're talking to the wall; please know i have felt more seen in some of your ask messages, than i have with any eyes on any human being.
thank you, thank you, thank you.
no bad news to report! good ol' uncle nina just got a lil...depressed. :/ ( unfortunate bipolar and not awesome brain growth side effect, ) BUUUUUUUUUUT, MY LOVES!!!! BUT I AM PUTTING ON SOME MATTE BLACK LIPSTICK AND I AM GOING TO KILL THIS MOTHAF-
With Kindness...And...Pacifistic Resistance.
BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEECAUUUUUUUUUUSE ITS GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOTHOBER, BABY BABY!!!!! *alexa play season of the witch by lana del rey* AND IF I DONT GET TO TALK ABOUT THE BOYS GOING APPLE PICKING??? LIKE??? THE PUNKIN PATCH??? HEEELLOOO AND MY PERSONAL FAVORITE:
JERSEY KYLE ( NORMIE SCAREDY CAT KING ) BEING FORCED TO ENDURE SCARY EMO BOYFRIEND HALLOWEIRD THINGS ( THATS THE PRICE OF HAVING A GOTH BADDIE BOYFRIEND! CRY! COPE! ) SCREAMING LIKE A LITTLE GIRL AND LEGITMATELY BEING THIS CLOSE TO ENDING IT ALL WHEN AN AUTOMATED SKELETON POPS OUT AT HIM AT SPIRIT HALLOWEEN. <3
#nina speaks#sorry i am truly not sure who is even around but thank you for keeping the faith baby i have been having a rough time#BUT RAVENSTAN ENDURED HORRORS AND I WILL NOT LET THAT GO CELEBHATED DURING HIS RISE TO POWER#AKA (RAVEN)STAN SEASON AKA HOT TOPIC THOTTY BOTTOM AUTUUUUMN AKAAAAAAA GOTHTOBER BABY#hoooooooooooo also whoever saw my pinterest boards / aggressive pinteresting it helps me when i am sad#also yes i was being insane yes i think about them in college a lot post rm it means a lot to me i'll elaborate soon#also whoever asked about k...inktober...i cant promise anything you can send me stuff but it might not be what u want#or on time or done...idk do whatever you want my friends ill answer that ask in a little bit too anyways ilysm#thank you for hanging in there with me; hyh -un
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LOVELY DAUGHTER UNSOUND MIND!
#her name is the morning dews her name is light ! her brother has no excuse for his cruelty she can#change the world she has to change this country first if one day she resents me i hope i will care for her stil#his name is the lake his name is the singing bird he is going to to die soon its all neurodegenerative i miss him dearly#and ill miss him more still. a pool of wealth gathers on the shores of an island in the carribean holding ears#building domes and turning heads away in terror of the finite. a photo to the chat of a styrofoam cup full of himalayan salt#sent by the millionaire. answer echoes answer. would you like to be a guest speaker inside my lungs?#THROW THE ARROW INSIDE THE AUTOCLAVE PIERCE THE APPLE ON THEIR HEAD WITH GREAT STERILITY WITH GREAT CARE WITH SOUND MIND#somewhere over the ocean there is turkish coffee the dark wood of a berlin coffee shop the white sunlight of swiss alps#my friend sending me poetry in jest from tokyo her heart in rural china#my heart with the large sun of northern iran flowing through streetlight poles at dusk holding two trans girls hand in hand
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how's your day
me sleepy
#asks#zzzzzzz#okay to actually answer im doing good!!! just really tired#art school is HARD chat i was busy all week and ill be busy most the weekend doing homework#BUT despite everything the rest of episode 3’s add-ons and episode 4 especially is coming SOON#i looked at old episode 4 boards a bit ago and got really emotional sniff theyre everything to me sniff#i think episode 4 might be my favorite of the season#in other news i watched the new tpot this morning they cooked so hard like what the freak????? so good#and rewatched the new drdt if you know you know unfortunately…. a fan NOT A FAN OF DR THOUGH I PROMISE#and i miss my best friend and im really gay /p HELP#and thatsabout it#thanks for asking :D
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Keito&Sota for mini
#fantastics from exile tribe#fantastics#kimura keito#nakajima sota#jr exile#jpop#けとそた#hello good morning i just wanted to let u all know that i am alive orz#work and life and too much lately i miss fanta;;;;;#i have like a million ketosota gifs to make but this is all i can manage rn pls forgive me ketosota#also i have a big presentation/training to lead tomorrow and ofc i woke up today with a sore throat OTL#ketosota pls heal me i just need to get thru tomorrow and then maybe ill have more time UGH#tho natsunatsu gianna released today which means my order of magazines should be shipping soon!!!!!! ketosota mini come to meeeee💕💕💕💕💕#sigh i just wanna lie down but alas i am at WORK🔪🔪🔪🔪🔪#i miss u fantaro friends pls know that i still check tumblr and see u all i am just behind and too busy to make posts;;;;#feel free to dm me bc those i can actually answer orz
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#personal#soo ive discovered a giant hole in my back tooth because medicare doesnt cover dental except for children#and so i havent been since i was 21 and i try to maintain tooth health at home but im not very good at it#due to being raised wrong about it and also autistic and i cant afford even a basic clean and checkup#which is what i was actually looking in my mouth and deciding i need which would be about 300 bucks already#and now im scared to eat anything because i definitely cant afford to make this worse 🙃#genuinely so much bad shit has happened and every time its like. ok ill pick myself up cause no one else will and dust off and things#will be fine in the end they always are and my heart believes this will be fine too but i dont remember the last time i was#this genuinely legitimately scared. im so scared and i dont know what to do#i know the next steps is to call dentists in my area tomorrow and check if they do medicare but i feel i already know the answer#idk if its better to have looked or to not and be able to live my life but its food time and i cant make myself eat#im scared to make it worse im scared of the pain that might cause im scared of the upward 2k damage costs if it gets worse#fuck#fucking fuck#okok panick attack over i have a two step plan: part one call around tomorrow and see if anyone takes medicare#part two: i have pliars and towels and painkillers and a lot of conviction in both my diy skills and my caring for my own wounds skills#in the mean time just be more dilligent to brush immediately after eating and ill grab mouthwash too as soon as i can as im currently out#i have a family friend whos a vet maybe theyve ripped out a rotted dogs tooth or two before and could help. but ill cross that bridge#when i get to it fir neow i should check with real dentists before making assumptions. and eat because ive been crying and shaking#and was already hungry and now am exhausted. from the aforementioned shaking and crying and need to eat even more#in all cases. dentist on medicare being the best obviously but in all cases im gonna ask to keep my tooth. unless i do it i dont need to ask#but i forgot when i had my wisdoms out a a few years ago. holy fuck that was like a decade ago actually wtf#ima make a necklace out of it since its just the one and not a pair#and just like that things will be fine. as expected as they always are once the panick mode is done im ok i have a plan and im good
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‘The worst thing she can say is no’ and its the proposal scene from LAD8
#snap chats#HELPPPP THATS SO SAD#im an asshole for not posting the vid but if anyone asks ill share it#im just on mobile and im lazy LMAO BUT ANYWAY#NOOOOOO LIKE. I CANT TELL IF THIS IS BETTER OR WORSE#i thought saeko blew up or would have a volatile reaction#like i was holding my breathe waiting for her to hit him or yell because thats so typical innit#but no she just. Lets Go Home :) My Answer? Uhh Let’s Go :)#LIKE MISS MA’AM???? DAMNN poor ichi#twelve bucks saying they get married at the end#BUT GOD DAMN THATS LIKE.. SOMEHOW WORSE THAN JUST SAYING NO#ichi pouring his whole heart and soul out… ALSO THIS ISNT A DIG AT SAEKO AT ALL NO NEVER#JUST… MAN… i wanna know what shes thinking….#shes shown shes not used to having friends so never mind the thought of marriage and a KID#i mean presumably they mustve been dating a while but either way…. wow…..#jan 26th get here soon. im having a horrible day just please distract me#i told yall going to my moms is always a nightmare i wanna leave but i cant go until monday#anyway bye……. im gonna just. sit here LMAO
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happy new year new moot safi! im literally geeking because of your tumblr theme it’s sosoososo pretty. the taylor references >>> i was reading your about me and my mouth went wide open bc the “i wanna be defined by the things i love” and “not the things i hate” was so smart 😭 ugh i love your brain. looking forward to our future interactions! muah! <3
sobbing you’re so sweet i saw you like sanrio and jake from enhypen and my mind went yes yes yes nd your little theme is sooo adorable it makes me think of matcha. i’m so obsessed with the colour akdjsjdjd.
but thank u kaori !! happy new year to you too !! i am on hiatus rn but ill definitely be trying to be more active in the next few months so i can see what you’re up to hehe <33
mwah, enjoy the new year and i can’t wait to see more of you soon lover <33
#꒰ its nice to have a friend. ꒱#꒰ lover girls — kaori. ꒱#if u think ur fangirling ur so wrong aksjdhdjd im fangirling so hard#you’re so nice ily#also to everyone i’m ignoring��� i’m sorry ill answer my inbox soon i promise 😭🫶
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You ever wonder how short human lives are? They have the average life span of maybe a pet to most elves, won't they? Or even less. Looking back, isn't it hard to imagine how hard it must be to move on from someone who only lives for a sliver of your own lifespan?
😋 anon
😋 if this is your attempt to making Elf!Haitham the theme of the blog I ain't doing it HAHAHAHAHAHA
#if you want MY serious answer- then of course.#I've always known how short people's lives are- and for a long time- I was unaffected when loved ones die. There was an “eeasy#step by step process for me before. I was and kind of still am welcoming of death.#and when that one person I cared for was ill- I was also quick to acknowledge that it's probably their time#throughout their last remaining days I just waited that maybe when it happens- they can stopped being tubed-#stop suffering.#When my grandfather passed away- I was more grimly reminded that life is truly short#but instead of that quiet “I told you so. I knew he would pass soon.”— what I felt was pure anguish#To pat your grandfather's head one last time- devoid of life as he laid still#That midnight remains clear as day to me. Life is short. I knew that since the beginning.#I didn't shed as much tears as I had when a friend my age had passed on— because I was comforted with the thought that#they had passed months before the pandemic began— and Covid was seemingly a more painful fate#So yes.#I know how hard it is like to move on from someone who does not share your life span. Who had lived longer than you have and will leave#faster than you— despite your neverending comments about ending it all once you've finished your tertiary education#that you spout since childhood.#So. Well. Yeah!!! I know what it's like HAHAHAH. it's S H I T.
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is the cometcare ask blog going to be a new arc on the asksparklecare blog or is it going to be it's own thing? asking bc i miss the asksparklecare blog lol
it's going to be a separate blog !!!! because i have a whole story and plot planned! and i don't wanna clog up the regular ask blog (also it isnt canon so i dont wanna confuse people. im going to make an info carrd with a summary and disclaimer about the canonicity of the ask blog and what is and isn't actually canon)
#answers#pollarrydoomi#more characters will be added to my toyhouse as they appear on the blog! and soon ill put full fledged bios and everything#the parents and side characters like former patient friends will also be added as they appear !!!
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been receiving such nice messages abt col 😭🥹❣️ u goise (gn) !!!!!! i am so touched !!!!! the amt of notes on the masterlist too omf rlly didn’t expect that 😭
@ that anon who asked about what it was like leading up to the col couple’s first time, i’m thinkin thoughts & cookin smth up for u!!!
#i am not ignoring u anon !!! ill answer it when i finish writing it 😳🫣#i guess this means more col content soon 🤧#if u would also like to give urself anon names !!! so i can identify !!! that would be cute#anyway i am going to answer the nice messages after i get back from the gym !!#i plan to make cookies today for all my september baby friends !!! 🍪#i will also now make cookies for all of u!!! for being so sweet!!! 🍪🥹
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you will never be too old to find someone for you. society puts a lot of emphasis on dating in high school or right after but in reality the number of people who stay in those relationships untill marriage is low. real life doesnt prioritize those years! you are never done meeting people who will love you and you will love too. there is no timer ticking down. 24 is not too old, i promise.
i know you’re right 😞😞😞 idk why i have issues abt this bc most of the ppl i spend time w / follow on inst*gram (where i saw that post 🥴) / etc are at least a couple yrs older than me if not decades and also in most cases didn’t meet their person until they were around my age or older so it’s like why not enjoy the ride and just trust that it’ll all fall into place bc ur teens and 20s are definitely not as stable or happy or whatever as they’re made out to be sometimes. i think i just need to stop looking at social media that isn’t tumblr and find a different counselor and learn how to drive 😭
#asks#purrs#tysm for this though. also yes you’re so right it’s not just romantic love that matters and i definitely have a lot of friendships in my#life thst are legitimately the only things keeping me afloat and i will make new friends and cherish the exisitjgn friendships too. i think#i am ermmmm just a little mentally ill and need to unfollow some ppl LOL. like last yr i had a meltdown after watching an actress i like (🥴#make a video abt how she just got engaged to her middle school sweetheart and instead of feeling hopeful (or u know… happy for her) i just#felt jealous and hopeless and that’s not good or fair bc she deserved that so much and it was not about me AT ALL! but yeah. idk what im#sayi ng im just in a bad mood and being insane. but ty for this reminder augh#also i will answer other asks eventually i promise i just saw this in my notifs and had the energy to reply. i have so many more and i will#get to them someday soon i hope. which reminds me another reason why i am scared iam foreveralone is bc i have the SMALLEST social battery#in the whole world and i just get overwhelmed by messages and hide without even opening them lol. but i appreciate them and i need to try t#get better. ok im typing a lot ummm embarrassing.. back to da dash#reminder
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📚🥳📈
oh my gosh you have no idea how excited i was when i saw this in my inbox so thank you so much for the ask <3
it's kinda funny that this is for the fic writer 2022 wrapped ask game when i haven't posted a single fic this year, but alas...soon. soon.
it's also awfully convenient that none of these are directly related to fics :D so i'll be talking mostly about my original writing here
📚 How many wips are you taking into 2023?
oh, so many. i've got a bunch of fic ideas for a handful of fandoms that i've been circulating in my head for a while now (some for even more than a year) and i hope this is the year i actually get to share them with you all <3
beyond fic though, i also have several ideas for original work that i hope to share more about on my writeblr (@anagnorvices), which you might be seeing more of shortly if all goes well—read: if i can knock my brain into gear
🥳 What writing accomplishment made you most proud?
i don't talk about my personal life much on tumblr, but this past year i've attended a couple writing programs and i truly feel that they were some of the best experiences of my life and have been pretty transformative for me as a writer (not to mention i made some amazing friends <3)
in related news, i've been branching out into poetry a lot more and honestly, i'm pretty happy with a lot of the things i came up with, even if they're not perfect
soooo i guess what i'm trying to say is, i'm most proud of myself for expanding my horizons as a writer :) not necessarily a quantifiable writing accomplishment but eh i think it counts anyways
📈 Were there any recurring trends in your writing? Common themes, tropes, etc.
hmmm, i think just the fact that i wrote a lot of poetry this year counts as a trend haha
i suppose i've been trying to write more about identity, and how that intersects with the Self—what it means to be this or that, or to not be an identity that maybe you feel you should be, or that space of the In-Between; a lot of it's pretty personal to me and centers around family and idk i just think it's neat :]
yeah. i'd say i've been writing a lot about love
send me an ask
#ask game#ask#i should really have a tag for you#jelly friend#there we go#damn i realized while i was writing this that i sound super serious for some reason lmao#anyways some of my fic content is up on my writeblr as well just cuz like tag games and things#prob will post poetry and things like that on my writeblr eventually just avoiding it for now bc competition copyright etc#jelly i promise i saw your ask abt the cinderella and friendgroup wips i just havent had the time or energy to answer it properly but#ill do it soon#not sure if itll be on this blog or my writeblr (sideblog) sooo keep an eye out ig?#thanks again for the ask!! i literally was like ooh a new ask and i opened my inbox and went JELLY!! damn that was quick
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i love being genuine i love being friendly i love being excited and loving and open and wearing my heart on my sleeve i want to be like sunshine to the people in my life i want to be bright and warm and welcoming and if im too warm or too bright for some then we can cross paths and go our separate ways and if i am the spot of sunshine that others are looking for i hope they will welcome it and reciprocate it and stay with it, with me, for as long as they'd like or as long as they need or for as long as we can last.
#thought puddles#abt#to my future self#note to self#save#i want to keep this in mind so badly i think itll really help my irl social life. cuz thats died and it feels bad#i was talking abt this with a friend ? i hope and they said theres no such thing as too friendly#and BY GOD i want to live by that. i want to live like that. i want to be as open and friendly as i want#and the people who vibe with that will stay i hope and the people who dont will go but i wont be so dang lonely. i hope i hope i hope#GOD. why are relationships are so hard#humans are social creatures but we make these stupid social norms n stuff that make it so hard for us to be social !!!!#little kids have the right idea. go up to someone say can we be friends and let life happen. whys socializing so hard when u get older ;-;#also hi toby if your reading this ill reply to ur ask soon ive just told myself i cant answer til i finish my hw but i keep finding ways to#rpocastinate#whoops#yk what that meant
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Happy almost one year anniversary to the one ask rotting in my inbox !
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Social anxiety has ruined my hs experience
#haven't joined any clubs#i only have 3 friends#my teacher literally had to rake me outside the class bc i was so scared to answer a problem#erm#this is not very sigma of me#that wasnt funny#lol#loser#very#loser behavior#social anxiety#anxitey#mental health#mental illness#was having an episode#but im chill now#i have to start school soon#i think thats the reason why#im so like#scared
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