#to manami for not being able to save him and like tfw.........

[seadistic]

      the red sea’s corruption is absolute; or rather, it should be. 

      syake swears himself to the red sea, rejects the blue sea’s ideals &&. their beliefs, as he feels he’s been wronged by them &&. had everything taken away. while he had given himself willingly to those bloodied shores &&. accepted his prophecized title of ambassador, there had always remained a loose thread. with corruption &&. being reborn anew as ‘syakesan’, ‘manami’ had been considered long dead by syake himself. he would repress his past, hating every fiber of it, wishing it were gone &&. never existed --- the only thing he would hold onto was his jealousy, hatred, &&. bitterness that he had felt, as it had been his corruption’s fuel. 

       but being called by his past name will send him into shock. this manga panel &&. the focus on his eye always seemed strange to me, as did the colorization of his eye going from the red tint’s usual ‘grey’ to that sudden lighter shade. this only lead me to one conclusion: calling upon his past would have his old self fizzle in, in a way. his past self would start to bleed through again, if only sparingly --- but of course, syake hates that. he hates who he used to be. so naturally, he’ll only react violently in order to regain control &&. repress the memory once more: 

       he doesn’t want to be reminded. he doesn’t want to remember. manami is dead, &&. he shouldn’t be brought back.