#to be fair to her she doesn't know anything about dragon age

[a-gay-bloodmage]

I love asking one of my beloved beta readers who her favorite one of my characters is while she's reading my ABGInk fics and her fully just saying "Zevran"

Sweetheart my beloved my dear my beautiful dumbass how dare you

[spacebarbarianweird]

Dadstarion prompt:

Caretaker takes the kid to a fair, playground, restaurant or shopping, just spending the day and having fun together

Ha! Take that. Pure fluff. What could possibly go wrong??

Synopsis: Tiriel and Astarion take Alethaine to a fair.

Tags: dadstarion, dhampirs, fluff, a snippet into the future

Another fluffy thing I have written! And there is also a snippet into the distant future with adult Tiri who hasn't inherited her mother's macabre nature!

Alethaine's age - 12-years-old

Thanks @themadlu for beta-reading!

Read on AO3

Masterlist

Headcanons

Guide on How To Skin Monsters

Tiriel stops at the daggers’ stall. All of them look rather dull and Tiriel decides to search for something better for Astarion. Besides, he prefers to choose weapons for himself and Tiriel can always get something else – a book, jewelry, or a shirt. He always huffs when she brings him gifts, but she knows he is grateful for those little reminders of her care.

“Looking for something?” A merchant, a halfling woman, asks.

“Nothing in particular,” Tiriel says.

The halfling is definitely in the mood for talking and starts gossiping about a feud between two noble human houses, a serious plague “originated by giants” and someone’s wife cheating with an ork.

“Oh, and have you heard? There was a murder in Secomber! The whole family was slaughtered and by whom? A dhampir!”

Tiriel takes her eyes off the daggers.

“Yes! A half-vampire! Can you imagine sleeping with a vampire? But I think their mother was assaulted. Anyway, the dhampir grew up and slaughtered the whole family! Those half-undead are merciless cruel creatures, and they say there are so many of them!”

“Yeah… cruel monsters they are,” Tiriel mutters.

She heard of the slaughter, but there were no dhampirs or vampires involved. Just a young man possessed by a dryad. He was hanged a week later, but someone started spreading rumors his mother fucked a vampire and that’s why her child grew up so bloodthirsty. 

Tiriel feels pale hands hugging her waist from behind. Alethaine presses her face against her back – she is 12 but she is still cuddly as a little child.

“Oh, is this your daughter? Such an adorable little girl. How old is she?”

“Alethaine,” Tiriel touches her fingers.

“I am twelve,” she says, trying not to betray her fangs.

“Oh… I am sorry… didn’t notice she was an elf.” The merchant apologizes and then proceeds  to tell other gossip.  

“Have a nice day,” Tiriel says, taking Alethaine’s hand.

“You too! And beware the dhampirs!”

“Beware the dhampirs my ass,” Tiriel says, moving further away from the obnoxious halfling.

“I can bite her,” Alethaine suggests. She is twelve, but elves mature slower than humans and half-elves and Tiriel notices her daughter sometimes behaves like a younger child.

“No, we are not biting people we don't like.”

“Dad wouldn’t mind if I bit her!”

“Hm, good thing it’s daylight then!” Tiriel rubs Alethaine’s ear. She knows her daughter too well not to notice the merchant’s words upset her. 

Cruel merciless creatures? Alethaine cries her eyes out every time someone dies in the books she reads! Well, she mostly sympathizes with dragons and monsters – but also with orphan children, victims of arranged marriages and curses. 

And little dead animals. 

Little dead animals are a whole different story. It’s been three years, but Alethaine still feels sorry about an albino kitten killed by a stranger. The dhampir accidentally resurrected the pet and now Tiriel and Astarion also face the issue of raising a necromancer.

“Hey, don’t be sad!” Tiriel leans to a little dhampir. “Do you want anything?”

Alethaine doesn't answer. She stops by the book stall completely enchanted by a huge black volume covered in leather. 

How to Skin Monsters.

Aletaine immediately flips the pages, and Tiriel sees intricate and creepy pictures of the insides of different beasts and monsters. She’d fought many of them in her lifetime (beholders in the Underdark are still one of her worst memories), but never ever did she want to look at their remains, let alone study them.

“Hey, don’t touch it!'' The merchant tries to take the book away from Alethaine’s hands, but the dhampir keeps holding it with her iron grip. “I think this book is rather dark for a little lady like you.”

“Mum, look, the cover is made of human skin,” Alethaine casually says. “No. It’s half-elf actually.”

“No it isn’t!” The merchant protests. “It’s… wolfskin!”

Liar, Tiriel realizes. She has good perception skills, and the merchant lies. And the dhampir necromancer has already passed the verdict. 

Alethaine puts the book away and takes another one – a green volume with letters in Espruar. 

“Is it just a collection of stories or the real guide on Feywild?’” Alethaine asks. “People who have never messed with fey write all sorts of fairytale stuff about pink unicorns and fairies who grant wishes.” She opens the book which is written with trembling handwriting. “Oh, I see. Looks like a feverish nightmare. So the writer has been there.”

The book merchant looks at Tiriel with a facial expression she knows too well. 

What crypt did you find this child in?

“I have some ballads and traveler guides. Maybe...it is more for your age?” he asks

“Travelers guide on what places?”

“Icewind Dale, but it’s a rather uncomfortable read…”

“I’ve read about Icewind Dale,” suddenly something else attracts her attention and she points at a small book with a dragon on its cover. “Show me this!”

The merchant sighs in relief and reaches for the storybook. Tiriel looks at the pages – even though she still experiences issues with reading, she sees that it's just an adventure story about knights, princes, dragons, and treasure hunting.

Something her daughter stopped reading when she was five or six.

“I will take this too,” Alethaine declares.

“Eighty silver for all three,” the merchant says.

Too much, Tiriel thinks. Alethaine frowns but doesn’t try to bargain. For some reason, she is very shy when it comes to arguments.

“Thirty silver,” Tiriel intervenes. “And we are not telling anyone about the half-elf skin you’ve bound the book with.”

“It’s not made of anyone’s skin!”

“I can hear her screams,” Alethaine whispers, flipping the book pages. “They flayed her when she was still alive!”

The merchant gulps. Tiriel chuckles. So, this is true and the merchant knew it.

“All right. Thirty,” he mutters and Alethaine happily gives him the silver coins. 

Alethaine puts the books in her black bag and wishes the merchant good night. The man mutters something not appropriate for children’s ears.

“Did you catch the scent of the skin or it’s more like your necromancy skills?” Tiriel asks, taking her daughter’s hand as they stand by the stall with needles and threads. 

She shrugs. “I-I don’t know. Maybe both.”

“Do you know if Dad needs something to sew?” Tiriel still can’t really tell apart shades of the same color and all needles look the same to her. 

“Take the black threads,” Alethaine says, touching the samples of fabric. “He’s always out of them.”

Tiriel nods. She doesn’t know why and when Astarion decided to make all his daughter’s wardrobe black, but here they are. Alethaine got from black onesies to black dresses, from black nappies to black skirts, gloves, and coats. Only her shoes and boots aren’t made by Astarion - and they are as pitch dark as everything else.

A few hours later, at sunset, they sit on the grass outside the market. It’s a beautiful summer sunset and Tiriel adores the light. Alethaine sits on her traveling cape and takes out one of her new books. 

“Interesting?”

���Uh-um,” she nods, completely taken away.

Tiriel smiles to herself. She’s never been a stranger to violence and dark things – if you faint at the sight of a blood sacrifice, you won’t survive in the wilderness. But having a child like this takes everything to another level.

Death, dark arts, corpses – they have  a special appeal to Alethaine, the same one Tiriel feels towards fights.

The sun sets and Tiriel sits beside Alethaine. Darkvision allows her to see in gray colors and Tiriel sees a picture of the monster inside.

“All right, now I understand who all these people were who hired me to bring them certain parts of the beasts I killed.”

“Dad is coming,” she says. “Or another vampire, but I think Dad scared all of them away.”

Tiriel smiles. “Good thing vampires hate the presence of each other.” She stands up and approaches the edge of the hill. Yes, Alethaine is right – Astarion has left his daylight shelter in the nearby inn. She can see his silhouette from the distance – white hair and black armor she can’t mix with anyone else.

She waves to him and he quickens his steps. 

“Hello, darling,” he murmurs in her ear the moment he hugs her. Astarion pecks her cheek and Tiriel rubs his left ear.

“Dad! Look what I’ve bought!” 

Tiriel thinks Alethaine will show him the anatomy book, but, instead, she hands him the adventure story.

Astarion studies the first page, then another. Tiriel watches them carefully.

“I just don’t get it,” Alethaine admits. “Is it about how to enter the thieves’ guild or how to smuggle drugs?”

“None,” Astarion returns her the book. “It’s about how to find a job as a bounty hunter in Neverwinter.”

“Oh, I misread the symbols then,” Alethaine pouts.

“Wait, the book is in Thieves Cant?” Triel asks.

“Yes. Hidden deep under snotty stories,” Astarion answers. “And what are these two monstrosities?”

Alethaine proudly opens the anatomy book as Astarion studies the Feywild one. Tiriel barely prevents herself from laughing as she sees Astarion cringing at the pictures. Vampire or not, he saw so many disgusting and cruel things he hated looking at them. 

Then Alethaine yawns. 

“Let’s go home,” Tiriel says. It will take them till sunrise to return to Daggerlake. If they don't hurry they will need to set up a camp for the daylight - or leave Astarion behind which Tirel absolutely hates to do.

It’s not like it’s a big deal right now – thirty-two years since he gained his freedom, he has nothing to fear. More than that, Tiriel is sure there is simply no other monster in the area who could be a threat to Astarion. He is a vampire, an undead, a skilled rogue, a dangerous assassin.

But when he is alone, the nightmares slowly crawl back. The loneliness fuels his memories and there are so many of them. Thirty-two years are simply not enough. Astarion can handle that too – he’s learned to. But Tiriel doesn’t want him to face mental struggles if it can be avoided.

Alethaine walks in front of them and Tiriel takes Astarion’s hand in hers. They are her little family – everything she’s ever wished for. 

She looks at Astarion and notices his lips are squeezed and there is some anxiety in his eyes.

Hunger.

“Go for a hunt, we will wait for you”.

“Nonsense, let’s return home sooner.”

Tiriel doesn’t push it. They agreed years ago that Alethaine isn’t to see him dining on her mother (because it’s absolutely a sexual thing and must remain behind closed doors) and also that she shouldn’t see him feed on animals (because her dhamprisim might get awoken – blood will tempt her and they don’t want their daughter to become more a vampire then she already is).

Of course, she isn't stupid, she knows her father drinks blood. She often sees bite marks on Tiriel when she forgets to cover them – but the process remains out of sight.

It’s already sunrise when they reach Daggerlake and Astarion walks forward not to risk staying in the sun.

By the time they return home, Alethaine rushes upstairs to prepare for sleep. She sleeps a lot, even more than a human would – and Tiriel wonders how much dhampirism affects her sleeping habits.

“So, is the book really about how to be a mercenary?” Tiriel asks closing the door to the bedroom

Astarion has already put off his doublet and now sits on the bed watching Tiriel.

He waits.

“Yes. It was a guide on how to find people who will give her a job as a mercenary,” he slowly answers as if he had to concentrate on speaking. His eyes are focused on her neck. 

“And can she read this book?”

“She thought it was about smugglers and thieves. Her skills aren’t that good.”

Tiriel approaches Astarion and he tugs her closer, forcing her to sit on his lap.

Astarion is no longer a sweet caring elf – his predatory side is on the loose and he pierces her skin with his nails as the fangs are looking for the vein.

Tiriel wraps her hands around his neck and lets herself drown in painful pleasure. 

“Take as much as you need,” she murmurs. “I love you.”

She feels like falling into the warm dark void and, when she almost crosses the border of no return, the tender hands let her go and she finds herself on the bed with Astarion carefully applying a bandage on her fresh bite mark.

“Thank you,” he says, kissing her with his blood-stained lips.

“Will you stay with me when I sleep?”

“Of course,” he chuckles. “Besides Alethaine has occupied the bathroom – she isn't getting out any time soon”

“Oh… and I forgot…” Tiriel points at her bag. “I’ve bought you some black threads and new needles.”

Astarion kisses her cheek. “Such a caring and thoughtful wild girl. Now I have something to occupy myself with while you are asleep.” He takes her nightshirt from the floor. “Do you have anything in mind? I noticed you’ve ripped it.”

“Me? Astarion, you rip my clothes all the time!”

He unfolds the shirt showing the ripped collar. “Yeah, I agree. My fault. So, what patch do you want?”

“Maybe a dragon? A black one?”

Astarion covers her with a blanket – the one she uses when she sleeps alone – and sits on the floor with the shirt and the needle.

“I have a daughter who likes seeing monsters’ inside-outs and a wife who likes murdering monsters. Can someone in this family enjoy nice and cute things?” He pouts.

“Imagine Alethaine having a child who enjoys such things. She will pout then, ‘no one in her family has taste for macabre’”.

Astarion chuckles, and Tiriel wraps herself in the blanket. 

Safe. She feels safe. 

And loved.

**

Sewing has always helped Astarion to concentrate. It’s been centuries since he needed to shut the darkness up. Memories of his enslavement, memories of the misery have faded away and feel like a distant nightmare. 

But habits never truly go, and Astarion enjoys sewing patches and repairing clothes even though the old purpose of that process has long gone.

“You know, for someone who is an elf and was raised as an elf, you are very messy,” Astarion says looking at the ripped cape. It looks like it was chewed by a tarrasque.

“It’s not my fault! I was careful!” Tiri objects. She is making new arrows (as she lost the whole quiver while running from a particularly nasty behir in the Underdark the previous day).

Astarion chuckles. Tiri, his granddaughter, showed up at his place deep in the Fairgheight Range five years ago. Red-haired like her grandmother, she was eager to see the world beyond the Isle of Evermeet – and she still doesn’t show any desire neither to return to her parents nor leave him be and travel alone. 

“What patches do you want?” Astarion asks and takes his sewing kit from the traveling sack. 

“Well, I am an adult independent woman…” Tiri starts.

“You are thirty and you are an elf. You are basically a child.”

“Hm, you were a magistrate and mum would work for smugglers using her necromantic skills. Barely a child activity.”

“So?”

“I want a unicorn patch,” Tiri finally admits. “Or a butterfly. Don’t laugh, ar’o’su!”

“I don’t, damia,” Astarion finds white threads. “Besides, Alethaine has never been fond of cute and nice things.”

“Mum has her own idea of what is nice and what is cute,” Tiri touches a thin tiara on her hair. While all Tiri’s clothes are made according to Wood Elves traditions, her father’s ancestors, the tiara is pitch black and with a small skull in the center. It definitely belonged to Alethaine and then she just passed it to her only daughter. 

Tiri puts the new arrows on the ground and lies on her bedroll to reverie. Her drake, Aurix, immediately nestles on her chest like a cat.

Astarion casts a glance at his granddaughter. She has a certain similarity to Tiriel – and Astarion knows she would have loved her. But half-elves have such an offensive short life span in comparison with elves she had no chance to see little Tiri. At the same time, her facial features are her mother’s and sometimes she speaks like her. There is something else, something unfamiliar – Tiri’s father and their ancestors.

And she loves cute and nice things - and cringes at the sight of monsters’ inside-outs. Necromancy scares Tiri and she admits she’s never been to her mother’s dungeons just because of how uncanny it was for her.  And elves would often joke that their “witch-queen” just kidnapped Tiri because no way someone like Alethaine could give birth to such a sweet young woman. 

Astarion pierces the fabric with the needle.

“Well, so be it, a unicorn.”

-- Tag list

@tugoslovenka  

@herstxrgirl 

@herdarkestnightelegance  

@vixstarria 

@not-so-lost-after-all  

@marcynomercy  

@theearthsfinalconfession 

@starlight-ipomoea    

@micropoe10 

@astarion-imagine-archive  

@veillsar

@elora-the-slutty-songstress  

@fayeriess  

@lumienyx  

@tallymonster    

@caitlincat-95  

@tragedybunny  

@valeprati  

@lynnlovesthestars   

@marina-and-the-memes  

@waking-eyes   

@ayselluna  

@connorsui  

@asterordinary  

@darkarchangel96  

@locallegume  

@brainfullofhotsauce   

@coffeeanddonutscafe  

@my-queen-rhaenyra-targaryen 

@queenofthespacesquids  

@ednaaa-04  

@dajeong

@wilteddreamsofbaldursgate

[shadowkoo]

All About You

A Bangtan x Hockey series by @shadowkoo!

The upcoming season for the Denver Dragons is predicted to be an absolute game-changer! From lightning-fast breakaways to jaw-dropping saves, get ready to witness a showcase of skill, determination, and pure passion in both the game on the ice and the one in these player's hearts. The team is hungrier than ever, prepared to do whatever it takes to secure their victory. With rivalries heating up, new talent on the rise, and fresh sparks flying, this season promises unforgettable matchups that will have fans on the edge of their seats. So grab your jerseys and get ready to witness what this season has coming. Let the games begin! 🏒🔥

Bad For You - coming soon ↳ Official Teaser

Jungkook wants what he can’t have and it’s driving him nuts. He’s never thought of Natasha more than Namjoon’s annoying little sister, but that’s all changed now that she’s returned from university. Especially now that she plan to stay at his apartment until further notice. Having Tasha around takes his mind off the importance of this season, something he cannot have happen since last season ended so badly. A distraction like her might either become the biggest mistake of his life, or perhaps the best one.

Natasha know better than to sleep with the up-and-coming, all-star, fan-favorite hockey forward for the Denver Dragons. And it’s not because he’s just as much a player off the ice as he is on it. More importantly, he’s her brother’s teammate, best friend, and the guy whose place she’s crashing at. He’s been off-limits since the day she met him, but it didn’t stop her then, and it sure as fuck isn’t going to stop her now…

↠ pairing: jungkook x o.c. (dual 1st person pov) ↠ position: forward, right-wing ↠ trope: brother's best friend, forced proximity, age gap, forbidden relationship ↠ installment: 1/7

Thinking About You - coming soon

Taehyung has a secret. He's got a big, fat schoolgirl-esque crush on one of the hockey moms of the Dragon's sponsored junior league hockey team. He finds it utterly repulsive that merely catching sight of Florence sends a flurry of butterflies to the center of his stomach, an entirely foreign sensation he's not sure he enjoys. As if that wasn't bad enough, he also recently discovered that he transforms into a bumbling, incoherent mess in her presence, a behavior that is completely unlike him.

Everyone knows Kim Taehyung is the most popular guy on the team, especially in the eyes of all the puck bunnies chasing after him. He's a smooth-talking, swoon-worthy, wet-your-panties-by-simply-grinning-at-you type of ladies' man that women just can't get enough of. And based on what Florence has heard, he used to eat that shit up, using it to his advantage at every available opportunity. But now, his attention is solely fixated on her, and what's even more astonishing - on her son.

↠ pairing: taehyung x o.c. (dual 1st person pov) ↠ position: centerman ↠ trope: widower, single parent, fuckboy finally settles down ↠ installment: 2/7

Loyal To You - coming soon

Jimin has been eagerly anticipating the holidays for a while now. Not because he has anyone special to go home to or any familial commitments. He's been craving time away from the relentless demands of his career and the ice, a first for him. From the moment he first wore skates at the young age of three, hockey has consumed his entire existence. Yet now, he yearns for a much-needed break from the sport that has been his lifelong passion. Being a professional athlete has its perks (money, women, fame), but it also comes with it's fair share of downs. And lately, life has handed him a lot of downs. Upon arriving at the charming bed and breakfast where he intends to spend the next three weeks, he's instantly captivated by the attractive owner. Julie doesn't seem to recognize him, and she doesn't expect anything from him either. In that moment, he can't help but envision a different life distinct from the one he knows, one where he can be just Park Jimin instead of player #33 of the Denver Dragons.

↠ pairing: jimin x o.c. (dual 1st person pov) ↠ position: forward, left-wing ↠ trope: hidden identity, instant attraction, the big secret ↠ installment: 3/7

Made For You - coming soon

Namjoon has lately found himself thoroughly intrigued by the team photographer for the Dragons. He and Avery have shared a friendship for quite some time, frequently crossing paths at the favored bar of DD Organization and often catching glimpses of each other nearly every day at the arena. He's taken aback by the fact that he's interested in her, considering that they are such polar opposites. He's usually quiet and reserved, channeling his energy into the game and his responsibilities. In contrast, Avery radiates a lively and outgoing presence, greeting people with warmth and capturing candid moments with quick snaps of your camera. When Namjoon finally musters the courage to ask her out, a small comment from you about seeing him as one of your closest friends shatters his spirit before he even gets the chance. Apparently, fate has dictated that they are destined to be just friends, or perhaps he simply needs to sway her perspective...

↠ pairing: namjoon x o.c. (dual 1st person pov) ↠ position: defenseman ↠ trope: coworkers, opposites attract, friends to lovers ↠ installment: 4/7

Lost In You - coming soon

Hoseok is a wild card, and the Denver Dragons Organization has just about had it. It's time for him to simmer down before he's off the ice for good. Their plan? Marriage. Yes, that's right. Hoseok is getting married to a snotty socialite, and the whole arrangement is meant to heal his status in the eyes of the rest of the world. He knows damn well he is the only person to blame for this PR stunt to be his last chance to redeem his shitty reputation. Coach made it very clear that not a single other team expressed any interest in trading for him if he kept heading in his current direction. Between all the fights, the public intoxication charges, and the constant news stories about him, it was bound to happen at some point. He just needs to make it through the next two years without losing it again. A feat that he finds nearly impossible when he's forced to be around Blair, his wife.

↠ pairing: hoseok x o.c. (dual 1st person pov) ↠ position: alternate captain, defenseman ↠ trope: married for convenience, enemies to lovers ↠ installment: 5/7

Searching For You - coming soon

After a complicated fallout with his now ex-fiance, Yoongi has made a recent vow to avoid anything and anyone associated with love. He has no time or use for it. Having weathered numerous failed relationships, his most recent resulting in calling off his wedding the night before, he possesses no need to subject himself to that kind of pain or heartbreak ever again. Especially not with someone as joyful and optimistic as Sage.

People often avoid Yoongi because of his cranky behavior, but Sage questions how much of it is his true personality versus a defence mechanism. It doesn't help that just simply observing Sage's perpetual good mood only seems to piss him off even further. But nevertheless, she's taken notice of him, and has undertaken a challenge of sorts to brighten the mood of the grumpy hockey player who often visits her bagel shop and get him to open up. The problem? He doesn't like to lose, and neither does she.

↠ pairing: yoongi x o.c. (dual 1st person pov) ↠ position: goalie ↠ trope: grumpy sunshine, sworn off relationships ↠ installment: 6/7

Trapped By You - coming soon

Seokjin has had very few moments in his life that have rendered him utterly speechless. Unfortunately, this seems to be one of them. Ophelia is the last person he anticipated seeing on his doorstep so early in the morning. One night stands are supposed to be just that - one night of fun without the moral obligation to see that person ever again. But here she was, nearly four months later, changing that 'rule' with her smudged mascara and a handful of positive pregnancy tests.

Ophelia always assumed she would have a baby at some point in her life; maybe a few years after getting married to the love of her life, when the timing felt right. But right now felt so wrong. She didn't love Seokjin; they barely even know each other. It wasn't supposed to happen like this, and most certainly not with the Captain of the Denver Dragons.

↠ pairing: seokjin x o.c. (dual 1st person pov) ↠ position: captain, centerman ↠ trope: one night stand pregnancy, strangers to lovers ↠ installment: 7/7

Join my taglist to be notified when each fic is posted!

*Disclaimers: Obviously, I am not affiliated with the NHL, given by my fictional team name, nor do I claim to know every single hockey rule or slogan, etc. We’re also intentionally forgetting that Denver already has a pro team for the sake of my sanity LOL. This series is meant to be read in order of release (top to bottom of this post). This series is written in dual first person POV (I did this, I said that) and shows scenes from both character's perspective for each fic. This entire series is 18+ as every fic will contain explicit smut scenes. Minors do not read or interact!

[eremin0109]

I sometimes get so sad when I remember how Kiryu lost literally everyone that he'd ever loved in the span of a few days. Shinji, Reina, Yumi, Kazama, Nishiki—all of them died right before his eyes and he couldn't do a damn thing to stop it. He was so depressed by the end of Kiwami, ready to throw away his life, not caring if he ended up behind the bars for life.

Who did he even have left that he could go on for?

Date gives him a reason. The girl who looked a little too much like Yumi. And that sparks something inside him, something so unfamiliar it almost wreaks him from inside out. He couldn't save her mother, but he will die trying to protect Haruka. Because she's the only one he was living for anyway, right?

Who else did he even have?

Except, he had Majima too. He had always had him. Right from their first meeting in the hazy, glittering streets of Kamurocho in '88 to the violently ritualistic run-ins with him in the winter of '05, Majima was the only person who was a constant, grounding presence in his life, no matter how fluttering. This man waited 10 years for Kiryu to get out of prison, was tempted to follow him right in because fuck it, at least they'd be in that shithole together.

Majima is the only person still alive that Kiryu knows from before. And that's a big fucking deal. Majima knew Kiryu Kazuma before he was the "Dragon of Dojima". He knew him as the punk kid with ideals too lofty for their lawless world. In a way, they came of age together, and grew increasingly disillusioned with the Yakuza lifestyle, also together.

Today, Kiryu has more people he loves and more reasons to live than he did back in '05, but no matter how close they get to him, no one will ever get to see that part of him that long since got permanently buried in the rubble of the millennium tower.

No one but Majima, who knows and understands. God, he understands Kiryu so much. That's why, whenever they meet, they don't need to talk all that much. One glance, one fight and a couple of drinks later, it's like no time has passed and they're right back on that fated, glittery night at Tenkaichi, clashing for the first time ever.

Kiryu has spent his entire life protecting those he cares about. But Majima is different. Kiryu knows he doesn't need his protection. He knows that Majima wouldn't be killed simply because he had the misfortune of being associated with him. And so Kiryu subconsciously depends on Majima the way everyone else in his life depends on him. It's not entirely fair, maybe also a bit selfish but Majima indulges him, every single time, without asking anything in return.

So yeah, Date was right when he said that Kiryu had something precious to live for. Haruka, yes but also this crazy bastard of a man who would refuse to leave him alone for the better part of 3 decades.

And Kiryu loves him, goddamnit. There's just no simpler way to say it.

[qierxing]

Sublime

A/N: So like. Hate to say it Diasomnia’s whole halloween thing was such a bad way to put a twist to Chinese dragons (y*na once again on her weird ass orientalist bs unfortunately) so I’m doing some tweaks on the whole idea. I’m gonna revert back to the original predominant myths of western dragons terrorizing people, since you know, that’s Diasomnia’s origin deal lol.

Yan! Malleus Draconia x Reader

Halloween AU

Sell your soul to the devil 

on the corner of the street

And if it isn’t eaten, 

then it’s null and void, you see

—

Malleus regarded time as a fickle, but irrelevant matter.

His family line assured that. Unlike mortals, dragons (if not slain) could live for centuries, and as they age, they can gain more and more wisdom Although, Malleus could not recall the exact age of his grandmother (and she would definitely scold him if he tried to ask). For each year that passes, is only a mere blink of an eye for the future king.

The Valley of Thorns is a nation of dragons, but it also had its fair share of human residents. Though there were many fae servants in the castle, there were also human ones, as per his grandmother’s policy that saw to the integration of them within the country.

“Malleus, this will be a new personal aide, [First] [Last]. The [Last] family has been serving us for a long time, as you may remember.”

How interesting. He recalls an old man who looks like you assisting him in certain tasks. His eyes survey your bowed head and stiff form. He wonders how long you would last.

Well, no matter. His green eyes flicked away, uninterested once more.

You'll be another forgettable face in another couple decades.

–

"Your Highness, could you perhaps afford to not make a commotion each time you go out?"

Malleus doesn't bother turning around. He sure has to commend you for your skills: it usually took Sebek and Silver several hours to find his haunts. And yet, it currently has only been half an hour that you've shown up. But you don't sound annoyed or relieved. Rather, he could almost say your tone was akin to apathy.

"Child of man, what is your opinion on this statue?" 

There's a pause. He can sense that he caught you off guard. He’s curious about what your response would be. Would it be pointless flattery? Most attendants were too afraid to contradict his opinion. 

“It’s ugly.” He nearly falls over from surprise at the bluntness of your off hand statement. Normally he would be angry but…

“You’re rather bold, aren’t you?” Your face shows traces of apprehension of fear from angering him, but you stand your ground. He smirks. How entertaining. 

Despite his expectations, you manage to surprise him pleasantly throughout your service. He finds his mood improving more as you serve him tea and read him the day’s agenda. You indulge his slow banter and old fashioned jokes, often inserting casual jabs that would’ve landed others in the cold dungeons, but for you, earn a hearty chuckle from the fae. 

Yes, he’s become so used to your presence that it surprises him that it takes Sebek, of all his confidants, to point out his affection.

“Young Master, I’m overjoyed that you are magnanimous with your favor to others, but today’s paperwork cannot be put off! [Last] cannot accompany you for today’s walk due to their other tasks, so please–” The rest is droned out as Malleus reflects on Sebek’s words.

Favor…yes, that is one way to view it. You are indeed someone he feels fondly towards, and it was with this revelation that he swears a quiet vow.

No matter what, he will do anything to make sure the two of you could stay together like this.

—

He’s beginning to realize that time is no longer something irrelevant to him.

He sees it. While Malleus remains unchanging like the seasons, he swears he sees more wrinkles in your skin, your strength faltering more often than not, and your memory too. No longer are the days where you’re able to catch up to him during his escapades, instead it’s usually Silver and Sebek arriving, out of breath but there, regardless. It’s a far cry from you, who now retires to your chambers after only a half a day attending to him. 

“[First] unfortunately was born of a weak constitution, your Highness. I beg your forgiveness, but please, let them be excused from their duties.” The woman that bows her head before him is withered, barely able to stand upright. So this is your mother. She’ll be dead in a few years, he muses.

“No.” The woman whips her head up, fear enlarging her eyes. “But your highness–!”

“I will let them rest. But they will not be parted from my service.” He waves his hand dismissively, ignoring the tearful cries and the doors slamming. 

The sky thunders and flashes as Malleus clenches his fist.

—

Dragons are terrible hoarders.

Malleus is no different, having an entire chamber dedicated to items and knickknacks he’s found interesting over his lifetime. However, up till now, no living beings have graced his chamber.

His unique spell is a curse and a blessing.

It ensures that things can be frozen in time, preserved in their prime before they can disintegrate into rot and mold. Forever stuck in time, unable to age or feel. Can no longer be touched or used, just a pretty little trinket on a pedestal.

He gazes down at the golden lined coffin, setting down a fresh blood red rose on top of your body.

He lifts your hand to his cheek, squeezing the warm flesh tightly in a terrible mimic of a gentle caress. If he closes his eyes, perhaps he can trick himself into thinking you’re doing this on your own. 

Even though you are now a doll, perhaps you could still love him in your still form.

[pumpkinbomb]

𝜗𝜚 kang junhwi (강준휘) 𝜗𝜚 twenty-four 𝜗𝜚 lesbian, cis, she/her 𝜗𝜚 retail (electronics) store manager 𝜗𝜚 a bright smile and cold, dead eyes… the lasting effects of six years in retail. whether junhwi notices or not, her customer care voice takes over pretty often, giving an uncanny, fake feeling during conversation with people he doesn't know well yet. she can snap out of it, she just needs to realize she's doing it.

birthday: june 6th, 2000. age: 24. orientation: homosexual zodiac: gemini. dragon. mbti: intj. hometown: gwangju metropolitan area, south korea languages: korean (native), japanese (intermediate) english (conversational)

the good and the bad, which are which? easygoing, outspoken, sarcastic, cynic, domineering. observant, curious. detached. mature when she needs to, but chaotic and unpredictable, crass, even. odd, always thinks outside the box. shameless. unapologetically cringe at times. nerd, gamer. monster energy fiend. smoker. can be perceived as cold, but she's very caring and empathetic. likes physical touch more than she lets on. she can and will be mean with those who wrong her or anyone she cares about. mom friend to some.

𝜗𝜚 background

kang junhwi's always been a city girl, one with a very average life. while conventionally pretty and generally charming, she's always being considered... weird. some thoughts are supposed to stay inside, jun-ah... her mom's voice still resonates– well, she's not dead, so it's not like junhwi doesn't still hear it now and again. it's not terrible thoughts, nothing vile... but concerning, probably. so, around strangers, junhwi can seem like a robot, taking long pauses to stop herself from just letting her tongue run wild and say whatever nonsense comes to her. how did she learn? the lasting effects of six years in retail. whether junhwi notices or not, her customer care voice takes over pretty often, giving an uncanny, fake feeling during conversation with people he doesn't know well yet. she can snap out of it, she just needs to realize she's doing it and find the right balance between regulating her thoughts and acting like a computer running on windows '98. but that's exactly why she immediately jumped at the opportunity to join seoulmates. if she's often told she's amusing and she's not shy about it... why not share with with the world? plus, the prospect of being around pretty girls, making friends, making them laugh, getting to know them... yeah. it was a no brainer. especially with how hard it is to meet people and make genuine connections. a reality show might be an unconventional way to try and find something like that but... junhwi's nothing if not daring. other than her day job, she dabbles with streaming her gameplays, but she isn't very consistent as it's just a hobby for her. she's very good at shooter, stealth and jrpgs– the main reasons why she knows a bit of english and japanese. when it comes to her romantic endeavors there's a handful of them and only two of them were serious. while she's sure of her sexual orientation and has had a fair share of experience, she has yet to figure out what she truly wants. it might make things complicated, this uncertainty, but junhwi can't tell if she wants to fall in love or if she's still finding herself.

𝜗𝜚 wanted connection/plots (will expand more later on) unless otherwise specified, all connections could flourish into anything, or nothing at all.

─ the middle/high school crush. like most, junhwi's realization that she liked girls was... slow. maybe it cannot even be considered realization, since at the time, she would stare, infatuated, thinking she was dealing with a serious case of envy that made it hard to breathe and had her stomach doing weird turns. only when she figured things out later on did everything click. to find her again here is mortifying, wondering just how badly she embarrassed herself back then. definitely a humbling moment now.

─ the baby. junhwi's doesn't believe motherly instinct is a thing, but when this person is around, she gets so much cute aggression and it's hard to contain! while the feelings are entirely platonic, they are strong and she would do anything to make sure they are safe and content. physical appearance and age don't matter but works best with someone cutesy/bubbly or nervous, someone who would be okay being babied.

─ the soulmate. platonic or romantic, confusing or straightforward: there's no doubt junhwi's met her match. they bounce jokes off each other, they complete each other's sentences. each other's ride or die, the spark is so obvious. maybe they don't like exactly the same things, but it doesn't matter, they can be in comfortable silence together anytime, any day.

─ the princess. there is something about this girl that makes junhwi act a fool. be it her beauty or the way they conduct themselves, she simply cannot look away nor be casual about it. whether anything blossoms or not, junhwi's trying to catch this person's attention with acts of service, jokes and time together, eventually calling her "princess" or "majesty" for shit and giggles, unless...

─ the rival. calling it a rivalry is ridiculous, sure, but since junhwi's on the sillier side most of the time, someone who's all about facts and logic would get under her skin so easily. and maybe they get along, but when junhwi starts babbling about some impossible scenario, only to be pointed in the direction of facts and logic... let's just say she's not above going full on childish.

ooc: always open to plot and brainstorm for any other sort of connections/plots. nsfw plot friendly but everything with proper discussion. ic drama is okay within reason, if i feel it's getting out of control i will reach out ooc to check how to proceed.

[soul-mates-podcast]

Okay surgery recovery tier list. I added the rest of the Limbus characters, sorry if the Mahjong Soul characters rankings are dumb and stupid I don't know a lot about them (Except Kallen why didn't I know you did a Kallen episode I'm so mad I haven't watched that).

Explanations from bottom up:

Sinclair dies obviously, will be extremely embarrassed when Dante brings him back. Miyu tiny small child will make it with help of her tiny small child friends, but will have a bad time. Anju is same as Miyu but even worse cause Chunibyo. Yi Sang will be sick constantly and will be musing on pain and death for the entire duration and will fuck up his post op-med routine, but he will make it for no other reason than his desire to experience the whole thing. Kuyo is similar to Miyu, but weird demon thing will make it slightly easier. Shirogane is a fairly heathy young man, but maintaining his strange love denial thing will get in the way of his recovery a lot. Hana is just a girl, she will be fine but it will suck. Faust fairs a bit better than Yi Sang because of the network telling her the best way to recover and is generally emotionless, but it will slow her down a lot. Lin would heal fast as a dragon, but they would have to do strange stuff during the surgery to get around the dragon thing and she would NOT take her medicine. Hannah would be top of B, but her anthro nature messes up her post op-meds and it will be unpleasant for her. Fu and Kaguyahime are just normal women, they're just innocent women. Iwao is old but will have adrenochrome and infant blood pumped into his veins until he gets better, will have a longer initial hospital stay but will still recover normally. Joe "Ron" Mike Wazowski's Dad is a strong healthy man but probably doesn't deal with chronic pain well. He will recover at a normal pace but will need to take an extend leave from television. Gregor is a war vet and has had drastic surgery before but he does have weird bug blood in the bug arm and is not in his prim (which was not much better in the first place). Also he chain smokes which is going to slow things down. Outis is a war vet, very healthy and will follow her med routine down to the dot, not quite enough for A due to age though. Lily and Nanaha both have great blood flow as tall heathy women, pain will be a little bit easier to bare as they are good at putting up a face, will heal a bit faster than other people. Rodion will curse under her breath about it a lot, will bring up that she needs to recover a lot, but she would still heal fairly quickly and can power through a lot if she really needs to. Hong Lu is a strange pervert about everything and is really tough for some reason? Kallen is canonically recovers quickly and is quite tough in general. Heathcliff will bitch more than the other s tiers, but he will be just fine and can still do things fine. meursault Ryoshu actively enjoys pain and is a Ring experiment freak, will recover in no time. Ishmael is self explanatory, literally can't die nor feel pain when she doesn't feel like it and is generally pretty stoic. I can't say anything about Don Quixote without spoilers, but I have no idea where to put her.

meursault

thank you for your participation in this important experiment. you're going to be so embarrassed listening to our kallen episode, i forget literally everything about her im sorry i havent watched code geass in YEARS

[kousaka-ayumu]

Kaida Akahono(Garmadon)/Cure Dragon

Trigger warnings: this may contain mentions of abuse, extreme bullying, character deaths, abandonment, abandonment issues, seperation anxiety.

Nicknames: Akahono-san(2nd years and 3rd years, Ortho(Floyd and Rook)), Kaida-chan(Yumeri, Sonomi, Hokori, Yuri, Mizuko, Fuyumi, Seiza), Kaida(1st years, Kaida, Farah, Hoseki, Kiko), Little Hybrid(Lilia), Child of Puppetmaster/Hybrid(Malleus), Princesse de Marionnette/Soldat de l'Hybride(Rook), Sea Dragon(Floyd), Little Puppet(Lord of Death), Lady Kaida(Sebek and Silver) , Big sis(Lloyd)

Age: 17

Height: 168cm

DOB: 7/25(Actual)

2/19(Presumed)

Twisted from: Aurora(Sleeping Beauty), Kotoko(MILGRAM), Grim Reaper, Towa(Go Princess PreCure), Hayate(D4DJ), Mafuyu(Project Sekai), Mizi(Alien Stage)

Species: Oni, Dragon, and human hybrid

Homeland: Ninjago(Birth Place), Gravedawn Village(Adopted: Destroyed), Valley of Thorns(Adopted)

Family:

First Spinjitsu Master(Biological grandfather: deceased)

First Spinjitsu Master's wife(Biological grandmother: deceased)

Lord Garmadon(Biological father)

Misako(Biological mother)

Wu(Biological uncle)

Lloyd(Biological younger brother)

Aiko(Adoptive mother: deceased)

Hiiragi(Adoptive father: deceased)

Dorm: Diasomnia

Club: Gargoyle Studies Club

Class: 1-B(No.5)

Hobby: Sleeping, playing chess, humming.

Likes: Sleeping, spending time with her loved ones, reading books.

Dislikes: Separation, her loved ones dying, people leaving her.

Favorite food: anything healthy

Least favorite food: anything disgusting

Favorite drink: Water

"A first year of Diasomnia, almost everything about her is a complete mystery nobody knows about her other than being a guitarist of Moonlight Bloom."

Appearance:

Kaida is a tall fair skinned girl with dark red hair with bright red ombre and a blonde bang with heterochromatic greenish blue and emerald green eyes.

As Cure Dragon hee hair became bright red and slightly curled and her bangs became lighter blonde, her eyes is now heterochromatic gold and violet.

Background:

Kaida is born to Misako and Garmadon, unfortunately due to Garmadon's descent into darkness Misako didn't have a choice but abandoned her kids at the Boarding School for Bad Boys and it's sister school Boarding School for Bad Girls to protect them for him.

Her life there is absolute hell cause the majority of them have bullied her daily like splashing water at her, throwing food, pushing her down the stairs and even went as far as putting poison into her food.

And if anything she doesn't really care anymore and became numb to the pain, she ran away overnight and accidentally bumped into a mirror deep into the woods and ended up in Twisted Wonderland.

She was founded by a lovely couple named Aiko, Hiiragi and their daughter Charlotte, and ended up being adopted by them.

But unfortunately happiness didn't last long as the Gravedawn Village ended up being attacked and her parents being killed, leaving her and Charlotte as the sole survivors of the attack, which is worse when both of them we're 6 when the village was attacked.

Luckily they were rescued by Lilia and ended up being raised in the Valley of Thorns.

Both her and Charlotte ended up coming PreCure at the age of 13 but it only lasted for 3 years before Charlotte died due to an attack leaving Kaida all alone.

Personality:

Kaida is a calm, deadly quiet and almost emotionless girl who only spoke a few words and very difficult person for people to make her angry.

However she wasn't always like that, during her youth she used to be a shy and timid girl but because of the treatment she got when she was in BSFBG she slowly became like this.

She has a sense of justice and has good intentions but she doesn't know how to execute them properly.

"Unique Magic:" Yin-Yang flame.

It allows her to summon golden flames(creation) & violet flames(destruction)

Trivia

She has insomnia

She gave off some puppet girl vibes

Her brain usually block off all the terrible memories she has back in Ninjago which means she doesn't remember her time there.

She isn't aware that she's Garmadon's child and thought he was just a myth

She has some sort of hearing ability.

Has shapeshifting powers.

She joined the Gargoyle Studies Club just so that Malleus wouldn't be lonely.

What do you guys think of her?

@zexal-club @yukii0nna @writing-heiress @marrondrawsalot @sundove88 @yumeko2sevilla @achy-boo

[howtofightwrite]

Hi! Are there certain types of asks you don’t respond to, and/or do you have a huge backlog of them? I sent one in like 3 or 4 months ago and still haven’t seen it come out, so I’m just curious as to what’s going on :) (I’m sorry if you do have guidelines posted anywhere I could not find them)

There are a few topics we won't touch. As a general rule, we're not particularly interested in covering sexual violence, violence on children, child abuse, and animal abuse. That list shouldn't be much of a surprise.

Beyond that, there are a few other things we, generally, won't cover.

The most common are cases where someone wants us to write their fight scene for them. We do offer that as a Patreon perk, but it's not something we're ever likely to do for free here. Off-hand, I think we've gotten about a dozen of those asks this year. The most recent was in the last couple weeks. Now, some of these asks do get public responses, but it's usually in the form of discussing world-building, or because one of us thinks we can get something interesting out of it. The recent “water horse,” question was one of these. So was Professional Monster Removal, now that I think about it. The original ask didn't come through Tumblr, and so I decided to revise it without the prompt. Which, part of why the tone of first couple paragraphs didn't exactly match the rest of the text (if anyone noticed.)

We also can't privately audit your work. At least, not through the ask system. This does come up from time to time when someone will send a sample of their writing (this did happen twice in the last four months.) There's two issues here. One, I wouldn't, so you'd get Michi editing and she is an absolutely merciless editor. The second thing is, there isn't really a way to do that privately in Tumblr. If you did it through Patreon, it would probably be through a shared Google Doc, or via Discord, but if you're in that tier, get in touch, and we can work with you.

I know this isn't relevant to you, but hate mail doesn't generally get a response. This should go without saying, but, I did publicly clown on that Dragon Age fanfiction writer over her attempted death threats a few years back. Similarly most of the misogynistic responses from Women are not Weaker than Men, or any of the subsequent posts, tends to get summarily executed. That stray fan of Shane O'Mara who never really understood his work, tends to get ignored. Though, I haven't seen anything from them in a year or two. Similarly, that guy who wanted me to know that “Space lizards are very important for the economy,” will probably have to wait... forever.

The real problem you're running into is probably because of how our backlog works. It tends to runs in a FILO pattern. That is to say, “first in, last out,” meaning new asks go on the top of the pile, and pushing down earlier questions in the queue. This has more to do with how Tumblr organizes its inbox rather than an intentional decision. For example, if I remember a question from five years ago, and want to answer it, I probably could not find it. I might be able to write up a post without that ask, but I wouldn't be able to notify the original sender (assuming they still use Tumblr.) This is the other reason that the dude who wanted to talk about space lizard economics will have to wait forever, that question was in 2013 or 2014, and there are roughly four-thousand asks burying his inquiry. (As a general rule, the only stuff that actually gets deleted is some of the hate mail.)

Another way to ensure a question won't get answered is to send it to Michi's personal Tumblr blog. There's only 153 in there, but, when answered, they don't get posted to How to Fight Write, and as a result, they're likely to get missed. (To be fair, the most recent ask in her inbox is from April 20, 2021, so that's not you.)

If you're asking about invisible lightsabers, I wouldn't completely give up hope. It wasn't really suitable for a full post, but assuming I can get Tumblr's inbox to cooperate again, it might show up in a batch of questions like the ones earlier this week.

-Starke

This blog is supported through Patreon. Patrons get access to new posts three days early, and direct access to us through Discord. If you’re already a Patron, thank you. If you’d like to support us, please consider becoming a Patron.

[theadhddragon]

So we know who your fave companions are in each of the DA games, how about your least favourite ones?

Oooh good question!

When it comes to Origins its not really fair, they are all amazing characters, if pressed though, I'd say Wynne, of all the characters she's the only one who tells the Hero that falling in love could be a bad thing, and that just vibes so wrong with me everytime I hear it

Awakening would be Nathaniel, he always manages to grow on me towards the end, he has the best arc in this, but unfortunately it means I just don't like him

Dragon Age 2 is a little controversial, it's Fenris, his close mindedness about mages when he can see how southern mages are treated, and in Kirkwall, the worst of all places to be a mage, annoys me. He had such an opportunity to grow, like Dorian does about slavery, but he just...doesn't. He's far more enjoyable for me in the comics

In Inquisition it's Vivienne, I don't even recruit her anymore. She'll only barely acknowledge atrocities other mages have suffered, and that's only if pressed. She got lucky and doesn't even live in a circle and yet she preaches that every other mage should be round up? I could excuse ALL of that if, when given the chance to be the first mage Divine ever in the south, she completely squander her power for personal gain. She could've done anything, made the circles better or more enforced or SOMETHING, but she just doesn't care enough about them. Yet if she isn't Divine she can't let the free mages just come together peacefully, she had to make her own gathering of mages just so she can be important. Nothing is ever enough for her and it never will be

[but-first--tea]

B A S I C S

Name: Ferthur Venator

Nicknames: none, unless aliases count. If they do, a lot of them. Notably, her most commonly used aliases for the past couple years have been Omori Kaya and Kasasagi.

Age: adult (I don't like to define characters by specific ages, especially with how wonky the passage of time in RP can be. But logically she's probably in her late twenties or early thirties by now. I created this character 4 years ago.)

Nameday: in game it's the 2nd sun of the 5th umbral moon. I've never RPed it.

Race: well she looks like a xaela

Gender: Female (cis)

Orientation: hetero/demisexual (eternal bonded to Eligos Venator, monogamous)

Profession: "I do what I want" (and try not to get caught). She owns an auction house now, though. That probably counts as an official job! Except it was more like the world's most over-the-top impulse buy while trying to shop for Starlight presents. She's suffering from a case of "asset rich, cash poor" at the moment as a result. That's probably going to suck when she has to pay taxes on the Omori Estate. Oops. Next BBEG: property taxes.

P H Y S I C A L     A S P E C  T S

Hair: White, and rather long. She doesn't wear it in a consistent way, and is instead adept at styling it many different ways to suit the outfit or occasion.

Eyes: Slitted gold

Skin: very fair, which can be a point of frustration for a lizert who would very much like to bask in the sun

Tattoos/scars: For most of her life, the very idea of any sort of permanent identifying feature was anathema to her, a potential threat to her anonymity and survival. However Eligos has slowly begun to erode these fears, and even managed to talk her into getting tattooed. A mixture of dragon scales, geometric patterns, and stylized florals now grace her right shoulder and arm, and curve along part of her hip and leg. So far she's managed to avoid any permanent scars, mostly by pulling a vanishing act when things get out of hand.

F A M I L Y

Parents: She was raised by a Doman shinobi named Harue, who told her that her father was a samurai who had perished fighting a voidsent. Unbeknownst to Ferthur, neither of these people are her birth parents. Harue is now recently deceased, and thus unable to tell her the truth of her origin.

Siblings: None that she knows of.

Grandparents: Harue's mother taught Ferthur her foundation in the arcane arts when the girl began to show an aptitude for them that Harue herself never had. Her grandmother passed away when Ferthur was a teen, leaving her to continue her arcane studies on her own. The lack of guidance went about as well as one might expect.

In-laws and Other: Eligos's parents are still alive, but they do not know Eligos is still alive, and so Ferthur has never met them.

Pets: None

S K I L L S

Abilities: Ferthur was raised by her shinobi mother, and thus was instructed in the shinobi arts from early childhood on. As she grew older, her affinity for the arcane began to show, and her focus quickly shifted to the arcane arts. Her obsession with magic brought her to some very dark places, however, and lately she has fallen back to her roots, relying mostly on the teachings of her mother to survive.

Hobbies: Dance, collecting clothing, theft and general mischief.

T R A I T S

Most Positive Trait: Highly adaptable and quick thinking on her feet, very protective of the self agency of others

Most Negative Trait: Obsessive and prone to spite beyond reason when something upsets her

L I K E S

Colors: Yes. Though to wear she prefers black and white, sometimes blue. (Why yes I did give her a magpie color scheme.) Even though she's not typically superstitious, she'll often wear red 'for luck' when she's about to do something particularly dangerous.

Smells: Jasmine, osmanthus, plum blossoms. Waterfalls and the sea. The spices and scents of the kitchen while Eligos is cooking. Sun-warmed skin and coconut.

Textures: Being buried in fuzzy blankets. Submerged in water. The touch of skin. Tracing anything with patterns or edges. The smooth softness of petals and leaves.

Drinks: Spiced tea, which she grew very fond of during her time in Ul'dah

O T H E R    D E T A I L S

Smokes: Nope.

Drinks: Tea, water. Wine occasionally with dinner. The most ridiculous-sounding drink on the menu if on vacation or traveling.

Drugs: On purpose? Not usually. She's too paranoid and always needs to feel in control. Eligos has talked her into experimenting with alchemy on a couple rare occasions in a very controlled environment.

Mount Issuance: Unless a very tall viera picking her up and carrying her around because she's smol counts, not really. She doesn't own a chocobo or horse, though she does know how to ride.

Been Arrested: She came close once, but she chose murder over capture. Things got rather dicey after that for a while.

Tagged by: @wpip-raham and @starforger Thank you! Sorry it took me forever!

Tagging: anyone who wants to do the thing! This was going around maybe a month ago but I wasn't feeling well

[kaija-rayne-author]

Some thinkee thoughts about 'the scene' and Solas's Romance. Spoilers for DAI Dragon Age Inquisition.

Okay, so, I've finished the base game part of the Solavellan playthrough. I've read a fair bit of responses to it all by now. But there're a few things I haven't yet seen. It's possible I just haven't discovered them, but I found some very salient character/story things in Solas that I want to share.

Please no spoilers on Trespasser or the books. I haven't gotten to them yet. My Inquisitor is non-binary like me, but because of how I RP her, I still use she/her or they/them pronouns for them.

For context, my real life job is an editor, and I'm a multiply published author.

The Solavellan Romance is an absolutely stunning example of a star-crossed lovers relationship. It's incredibly obvious they love one another, but due to Solas's plans and beliefs, they can't be together.

In the line 'in another world' you can sense his longing to set down his burden and just love her.

I can clearly see that it's this world, and this enby he's falling more and more in love with. But she will disappear when he works his plan. He's already in too deep. He just doesn't understand that yet.

That is the chef's kiss of star-crossed lovers. The longing, the subtle desperation, the knowledge of your love, and the deeper knowledge that you can't have it. That the stars are crossing the path of the love and severing any possibility of continuance.

All of that is beautifully crafted into Solas as a character.

I have so much professional and heartaching praise for this perfectly executed star-crossed lovers set up. Patrick Weekes deserves all the props for that. Star-crossed isn't easy to write. I know because I often write it. I have a deep weakness for star-crossed lovers, so I read it a lot too. This one was perfect.

I have to admit I don't understand all the fan reactions hating on Solas or acting as if he doesn't actually love the Inquisitor.

I mean, love or hate him, I don't personally care what people feel about him because it's a very personal thing. I just know how he makes me feel (and thus, my inky too).

But why are people questioning whether he cares about, loves, the Inquisitor? It's written all over him! Every gesture, every facial expression. Every tiny hitch in his breath.

I don't think I've seen his fear mentioned anywhere. Again, I just may have not run across it yet, but for such an integral part of that break up scene, you'd think people would be talking about it. He's running scared, utterly terrified. He's not leaving her for anything else.

Think about it. He's (likely) immortal, or at the very least nigh-immortal. Some estimates of his age are in the 5000 year bracket. From his perspective, he wakes up from a really long nap to find out the world he loved; the world in which he rebelled against the powers that were (who were possibly even his family) to save his people, only to find it has turned into something so unrecognizable that he feels honour bound to rectify his mistake. Honour is a heavy and incredibly important thing to Solas. You can see that in his reaction to Blackwall's revelation.

Solas is ashamed, grieving, planning to fix it but not sure he can. Alone, because he can't count on anyone else. (And his greatest fear is dying alone!) OF COURSE he's scared of falling in love. NOW IS NOT THE TIME must be ringing through him.

Hell, many many people are afraid of falling in love and they don't have a spot on the Dread Wolf's baggage.

Lavellan makes him feel. For a mortal. She draws his fascination away from the fade. Something he's said straight up is something that's never happened and he didn't think was possible. She jeopardizes his plans, yes. But if you've never experienced that kind of love, one thing I will say about it is this... if you fall deeply enough, there is very little that's unthinkable in reaching a place where you can have that love. That's the crux of his motivation in that scene.

That's what made him suddenly break it off. You can see it in the moment he pulls back from the kiss. He's blissed out when he's kissing her. The curve of his eyebrow and the way he has his eyes closed show that clearly. But then it hits him... he can't do this. His eyes widen just a fraction and you can see the moment he realizes he will absolutely lose himself to Lavellan. He would go down the path he's likely seen hundreds of thousands of times, falling in love. So deeply in love that he’d give up everything else for the path that would see him accept the world as it is, something he finds anathema, so he can stay in her arms, keep her, keep her freely offered love. His honour could never allow that.

Our wolfy boy is so terrified he turned tail and skeddadled with said tail tucked between his legs like the wolf he is.

I don't think I've seen even a peep about his fear. The reason he would tell everyone (and himself) for breaking things off with inky is that if his plans succeed, she won't exist anymore. There's foreshadowing on this in his personal quest with the spirit.

He believes so strongly that he needs to fix what he broke that he is cutting his heart out and leaving it on a silver platter because his people need him more than he needs his heart. That's his bedrock belief. And he can't let anything get in the way of that.

He's telling himself he has to let her go because of his plans, but that's just his excuse. Apparently, even immortal elven gods lie to themselves about love.

When he breaks it off with Lavellan, it feels like a shock because it's a shock to him as well. He took her to the waterfall to tell her the truth about himself.

His voice hitches just a little before he switches paths to tell her about the Vellaslin. I'd bet he was going to tell her who he is. But at the ultimate moment, he chickens out.

Wish I could draw better, I've got a hilarious image in my head of Solas as wolf covered in chicken feathers running full tilt away from Lavellan. Who has a silvery leash from her heart to his throat. The guy is lost already, he just doesn't know it.

He surprised them both. The depth of his feelings for her scare the shit out of him. He suddenly knows that he would give up everything for this love. He panics, and he's running scared from committing to the enby he loves.

There's an interesting bit of coincidence in that theme, and it's been used in Dragon Age before. Soilers for DAO

If you ever managed to piss off Alistair in DAO on the kingship path, (I managed it without trying hard 😅) he breaks up with you for much the same reason. His dialogue there includes 'I could get lost in you'. And that is what has sent our wolf running for the hills.

Solas has so very obviously never been in love before. He's hinted at that several times in his dialogue. TBH, I get 'virgin in the real world' vibes from Solas.

He may have had relationships with spirits, he may have done as Blackwall hinted and 'gotten frisky with a spirit in the fade'. But Lavellan is the first time (and Dreadwolf may very well prove me wrong) that Solas feels actual romantic love on the mortal plane. And for a mortal nonetheless! At the WORST possible time.

Another thing I don't see people talking about much, if at all, is how heavily neurodivergent coded Solas is.

I mean, nerdy research expert type dude who has eons of knowledge. (Walking encyclopedia thing, anyone?)

Esoteric artist using ancient methods?

Extreme reaction to an innocuous beverage like tea? (Taste/texture sensitivities anyone?)

Always on the edge of things?

Knows far more than he says?

Always observing, always learning.

He even stims in the cut scenes several times. He's heavily coded as either autistic or ADHD or both.

I've seen complaints that Solas isn't very emotive. But to me, he's screaming emotion with every gesture, every breath. Especially in the dawnlit and waterfall scenes.

I'm not even sure what to call it, animation? Modelling? What kind of name can you give moving artwork like a modern video game? Anyway, whoever took the writing part and made the visuals for Solas, I think, understood neurodivergency and enacted it perfectly.

His emotional tells are there. But, like the character himself, they're subtle.

Given how many complaints I've seen about that topic, I have to then wonder if I can see it better because I'm neurodivergent and my family is too. I'm used to reading neurodivergent people.

That's... that's not me being arrogant. Neurotypical people cannot read autistic and ADHD people very well, if at all. Our body language and facial expressions are so subtle or different that we're often accused of being angry when we're having a good time or are just deep in thought. Heard the term 'resting bitch face'? Yup. That's a common (soooo common) marker for an autistic or ADHD or autistic/ADHD person.

He's heavily neurodivergent coded, maybe that's why I don't have any trouble reading him? Are people just not picking up on all the details I do? (There's no judgement or fault in this. It's just fact. A lot of autistic and ADHD folks can't read NTs either. I can, but it’s something I learned to do vs anything innate. We're wired so differently and speak completely different non-verbal languages.)

During the waterfall scene, before the final part, he's got so much love and awe on his face and in his body language that it's so so obvious he loves Lavellan. I just can't grok the questions of does he or doesn't he. If he didn't, he'd have acted much differently.

It's just as obvious by the end of the scene that he's convinced himself he can't have her. That they can't have each other.

I've absolutely joined the Solavellan hell carousel 😆. I desperately hope Dreadwolf offers some sort of positive closure for Lavellan and Solas. I hope bioware believes in happy endings.

Aaaand my opinion is subject to change after I play Trespasser. I don't know very much of what happens in that, so I may have to eat these words.

[thessalian]

Thess vs Trust Issues

I have got to the point where I just don't trust Temp anymore, and I am truly saddened by that. I mean, fine, mostly because it makes my life miserable, but there you go.

Look, it could just be Scruffman not being overly good at communication, but when I've been at work for like an hour and I get an email from him going, "Just got a call from [Temp] and she's going to be out for the rest of the week", I have to wonder what the everloving fuck is going on, since the quality of her work has been in decline for quite some time now. I want to believe that it's just because she's having health issues or family issues or something - not because I wish her ill, but because at least then I could be sympathetic, if overworked and frustrated. But at this point, when she appears to be starting late, leaving early, generally avoiding anything she might consider difficult, and then vanishes for days on end with a call that late in the day? I cannot help but feel that there's an issue here that needs addressing. Either way, it means I get more work dumped on me, and generally more than my fair share of the Annoyances, because gods forbid New Girl ever touch them...

The fact is that we are understaffed for this. I was having pain spasms for most of the afternoon, and yet I knew that there was no way I could call in, because for fuck's sake, we have at least two more new doctors (more Annoyances, by the way - one apparently had no idea how her fucking foot pedal worked and is another one that will record dead air while measuring or thinking or whatever), and I can imagine I'd get, "But at least you don't have to commute home or anything; is it really that bad?" Hell, I recall a time I was having pain spasms and just emailed Scruffman to ask if it was okay if I stuck to shorter reports and take it easy throughout the day, and his return email gave this vibe of, "I'm confused and also slightly disappointed in you - we let you work from home to get rid of this issue". And that was when we had everyone in the office, were more or less on top of the typing, and all I was asking for was to leave the long reports for someone else because I struggle with those long ones on bad days. If I said, "I can barely move and need to be in bed", I'd probably get, "Well, do what you can as you can", likely knowing that I'd work myself too hard because decades of temping mean that oversized typing queues give me anxiety.

(Also, one of the Minor Annoyances apparently doesn't know how to mark a report as urgent, so we had a few liver and kidney biopsies that were desperately urgent because the patients' bodies might be rejecting their newly transplanted liver and kidneys that might have waited for two days if I hadn't interceded. This because New Girl sat on them all afternoon, partly because they didn't look important and they were dictated by a Minor Annoyance.)

There's some other entertainment-related trust issues as well, mostly involving Bioware. I haven't been watching the various gameplay trailers etc, mostly because they aren't showing me the things I really need to know (they still aren't being particularly forthcoming about accessibility options and it's really starting to worry me), but ... apparently there's some issues with the facial animations? Because of course there is - because they use fucking Frostbite, and EA hasn't invested in the tools to make Frostbite work halfway decently with anything but environments because it was primarily designed for FPS games. Someone made the comparison with Andromeda - gorgeous environments, somewhat frenetic gameplay, The Usual Bioware Weird Facial Animations (which at least still aren't as bad as Bethesda, but anyway). THAT COMPARISON DOES NOT FILL ME WITH CONFIDENCE, BY THE WAY. So yeah, I'm getting less and less interested in Veilguard at this point. A part of me wants to get it just because of how big a part the Dragon Age series has played in my life, but none of the announcements are really doing anything for me but putting me off. Granted, that's mostly because I cannot play ARPGs without pain most of the time, and they're still sitting on the accessibility options so all I have is guesses and hopes, but that's enough to just ... make me really sad, honestly.

Ugh. I hurt. A lot. I need to take it so, so easy tonight. I don't know how I'm going to get through the rest of this week. Even the bits that Temp does are something, and we're without that for three whole fucking days? We can't compensate for this, especially with New Girl doubling down on taking a bunch of typing, sitting on any dictations she doesn't feel like doing for literal hours, and then dumping them back into the queue on her way out the door.

[dearaliya]

Iron Flame: Was it prophecy or predictable?

Dear Aliya,

Immediately into spoiler territory, but may I first begin with a screenshot from my Iron Wing prelude followed by one of our during reading conversations?

Turns out that nap was SIGNIFICANTLY LESS PERMANENT than I'd initially thought. Shall we discuss?

So Jack is back! Or he never left? As much as I enjoyed the book I must admit, either I've gotten worse at reading and understanding or some of the passages in this book are just not well written. My rough understanding is that Jack's power was shields, he got buried but actually didn't and channelled venin style to save himself. This was all tightly followed by going crazy because that's what comes with ultimate power. He was nice enough when he came back, to a point where I thought he deadass might be added to the roster of men hovering around Violet, but then he just up and disappears for most of the book.

I mean, welcome back for all 36 pages you were actually a part of, a bulk of that being the finale, I guess??

I won't mince words. Why is he back? Was there no other option to destroying the wardstone? I mean he is the catalyst for the bond numbing serum so that's handy, but I have trouble believing that he was such a stellar student that three non-stop months were dedicated to his recovery when other students are typically just left to die. Perhaps they were also just using him as an experiment to see if venin-ness could be cured, but in failing they still just released him back into everyday life and hoped nothing bad would happen. Because he's always been a shimmering pillar of good behaviour and not someone who murders his classmates to prove that he can.

Speaking of! The fliers were a wonderful breath of fresh air because they voiced the very same opinions I held since the beginning of book one. Why is Basgiath so willing to kill off their cadets in the name of strength?

When told that challenges occur between cadets and can result in death, they're all understandably mortified that the war college allows this. Not to mention that in comparison to threshing, where yet again the cadets are highly expected to die, the flier cadets either make the cut or fail and have to pick a different faction to train in. They cannot understand why death is just expected when they're fighting a war and need all the numbers they can get and frankly, I couldn't agree more. But while I did enjoy the addition of the fliers as characters and them calling the dragon riders on their shit, there was one character I have to simply sigh at.

Catriona.

Of course, it wouldn't be a romance book without a love rival. There was enough going on between Xaden and Violet that she really wasn't needed to stir the pot. I enjoy her character towards the end, but when she's written as nothing more than a plot device to make Violet and Xaden fight I really couldn't be less interested. Aside from the betrothal to unify nations and Catriona being more attached to the power behind Xaden's name than him (which was a lovely bit of politics I wanted to see MORE OF) none of this is necessary.

Now, about Xaden and Violet.

I just... I need them both to open their eyes to the situation they find themselves in. Violet is mad that Xaden is keeping secrets, in a WAR where if even one gets out it could mean DEATH. Xaden's argument is that if she asks, he'll tell her which sounds like a fair trade in theory but consider, if you will, this same thought I held all the way back in school.

Teacher: If there's anything you don't know, ask! Me, tender age of nine: If I don't know what I don't know, hOw Do I aSK?

And that's the problem, or at least part of it. Violet doesn't want to ask some of the hard questions, fine. It's a contradiction of her character since she constantly needs knowledge and facts no matter the cost but fine. But even not asking the questions she does know to ask, how is she supposed to ask about things she doesn't know exist? And this is where I start to feel my patience thin with Xaden. He's chastising her for getting angry that she doesn't know anything because she's not asking but she didn't know about Catriona, Tecarus, his second signet and so on and so forth.

Is this the communication you promised? IS IT?

600 pages of the SAME ARGUMENT!??

And if they're not arguing, they're banging. I know the audience we're targeting, but with the amount of smut there was in absolutely inopportune moments just felt forced. We are two pages off a battle that might kill everyone they know and love, which might be a harrowing thought to process if the characters could get OFF one another long enough.

Now, although I just ragged on this book for 1... 2... 797 words, I will not have people believe I didn't enjoy it. So there are a few things here and there I have gripes with, I'm a picky kinda gal! The good outweighs the bad, mooooooostly.

I do think that this book was likely pushed out a bit too rapidly so the hype wouldn't be lost from the first book. Had there been time to go in and clean up this book, it would have really benefitted. Clunky dialogue, words that don't seem to fit the context, plot threads that go nowhere and random little thoughts with no conclusion are all scattered throughout this book. Just a whisper of tweaking could have ironed most of this out.

Curse capitalism.

But, unless I missed something in the marketing, this book isn't meant to be some otherwordly prodigy of a book, it's a romantasy with a high focus on the romance appealing to its designated audience after going nuclear on booktok. It knows what it is, Yarros knows what is it, and what it is is FUN.

Some of the lines from the characters, modern though they are, are fun and cheeky and youthful. The dragons, yet again, carry this book on their backs because all of their interactions are so enjoyable. There are little twists and turns that do catch you off guard, refreshing from the gentle handholding of the first book.

If people read it and like it, fantastic! If they read it and don't, understandable! But I do think everyone, especially those who want to get back into reading again as a hobby, give this series a crack because they're very easy to step into and get lost in.

Nothing more comes to mind, so I appreciate you listening to my thoughts. I’ll see you next time, stay well!

Hannah xx

[esther-dot]

White savior anon again lol. So I go back and forth on the J/D romance. On one hand, the show going thru with it and Martin's fixation on incest makes me think there will be some type of romance. That being said, it's not going to end well because all their foreshadowing is negative lol and speaks of betrayal. Also, Martin intends to complete the story in two books, which is not realistic since he gardended himself into hundreds of interconnected main characters and plotlines - he needs to set the chess pieces in place for the climax in the last book in Winds but he literally cannot do all that in one book. So, how exactly he intends to write some sweeping, dynamic romance when Dani won't even step foot in Westeros until the last leg of the book is well, lol....good luck with that one. That's why the show romance was ass, it's hard for audiences to buy a romance between two people who met and conversed for approximately 20 minutes across 8 episodes - no development or investment. I just don't see how Martin has the page space or time to do all he needs to do with the other 9768 characters and plotlines while developing this supposed grand love story between J and D. He's a talented writer, but deeply inefficient and made some key mistakes - the ages of the characters, wasting so much time having characters walk around the riverlands, braavos, etc. while internally contemplating their shitty lives for chapter after chapter, like ok you're miserable we get it but this could have taken half the chapters - so now he's screwed himself as a result lol.

IDK about Jonsa, I believe Sansa is the girl in grey, and I do think per the show (I think a lot more big plot points were taken from Martin than readers want to believe tbh) Jon and Sansa will have a significant relationship in Winds, platonic or not, or at least he intended that to be the case, but idk if he is willing to Go There with that pairing. He let way too much time pass between books and social mores have changed quit a bit. The faux sibling almost incest trope was pretty big back in the 90s and early 2000s, but now? Not so much.

Jon and the Targ line ending with him. Sure there are people will targ blood still around like Brienne and the Baratheons. But none of them are the direct descendent/son of Targ prince who plunged the realm into a civil war over said Targ's birth lol. Sure it's not fair, but thematically it makes sense and I do think this is what was intended back in the 90s. Now? IDK lol.

(continuation of this convo)

Oh yes, I've seen a lot of fans criticize how he allows himself to write so much of his favs (*cough* Tyrion *cough*) rather than streamlining. I can't figure out how he can bring all these characters and carry out the plots in two books either. I know he said they're big books, but there are so many things that have to happen and they characters are all still so scattered...I really don't know how he'll manage. Like, Sansa has to go North, reunite with Jon, reclaim Winterfell, be reunited with other Starks/handle succession, they have to deal with the Others and then there is Dany. It's a lot.

I don't think there could be a genuine romance with J/D at all. Jon's experienced the whole Ygritte situation, then he was assassinated, it doesn't make sense to me that he'd fall for an enemy so soon or trust one either, not with the guilt/betrayal he'll be feeling. I do think Dany is vulnerable with her belief that she needs another dragon rider/that will be a person she can trust and her romantic nature, so I think she could convince herself she can trust Jon and then he betrays her. That could be a fairly short-lived interlude though, since she's primed for it. There is also Euron and Aegon too though, and I had assumed that would be before she met up with Jon and if that's the case, Jon is not gonna have kind thoughts (if she kills Aegon), and Dany will be even less trusting (if she's dealt with Euron), so Idk. I don’t want anything to happen between J/D, but imo, there has to be some kind of relationship or trust to make it an awful scene when Jon stabbity stabs. Dany will have burned KL, if anyone else assassinates her, it’s badass, but I think Martin's way too anti war/anti violence to do that. I really think he's gonna want it to be painful.

Also, I’ve recently been wondering if instead of some past events being foreshadowing, they’re meant to work as explanation, justification for the end of the story. As in, I thought the mess of the war in canon and Robert’s Rebellion were meant to convince us that the moral thing would be to avoid war to spare life and that Jon would be KitN and kneel a la the king who knelt. The show’s bizarrely written inclusion of him kneeling seemed to support such an idea. Except, look at what the Targs became as rulers, where that ended for Westeros, and Dany has dragons and will have do her little KL bbq, so the moral thing in this instance isn’t submission, but neither is it all out war. I think that's the grounding for why it has to be faux submission then assassination.

I really don't think Martin would change his endgame now because of fan outrage or social norms, but imo, the foreshadowing isn't conclusive, or, I guess I should say, I see problems with every potential endgame, but particularly with Jon ending up at the Wall because of how it seems to answer problems Martin seemed interested in addressing. So, I think there's room for a nicer ending for him, if Martin wants it.

[moongothic]

I want to preface this by saying that this is meant to be kind of a shitpost. I just. The thought passed my mind. I laughed at it. Thought about it again, laughed some more and I just had to get it out of my system. So here we are

So when I read the myth of Toyotama Hime I did start to wonder if it could be used as fuel for the Crocodad Fire, the myth being about Toyotama coming from Ryuugyuu Castle to give birth on land etc. And in One Piece, we do have that very castle on Fishman Island. Which isn't surprising or anything, Oda getting inspo/names from various mythologies is nothing new by a long shot, and it's unlikely you could somehow tie Crocodile to Fishman Island through that myth. Like Toyotama coming "from the ocean" could just be turned into "Crocodile coming from the sea as a pirate", doesn't have to be deeper than that

But then I thought

...Do we actually know Crocodile isn't part-merman

Like. You see--

We know half-merfolk-half-humans do keep their fishtails like full-merfolk (see Charlotte Praline), and we know that while mermaids split their tails after 30, mermen never do. So between that and us having The Most Scandalous Feet Pics of Sir Crocodile (from the jailbreak cover story), well, we know he has basic ass human feet, so we know for certain he can't be half-merman

But also

Chimney is 1/4th mermaid. The only mermaid features she inherited from her grandmother were her hair color and her being a "good swimmer". Chimney is part-mermaid, and she has human feet

Like the only thing that could debunk this idea (based on what we know about Chimney) would be if Crocodile was a shit swimmer, but he's a Devil Fruit user so of course he can't fucking swim. So we have literally nothing to prove or debunk the idea.

So like

You've heard of "Crocodile is Whitebeard's bio-son" You've heard of "Crocodile is the missing Kuja Empress" You've even heard of "Crocodile is Xebec's son".

So how about

"Crocodile is 1/4th merman"

Why the fuck not

But the funny thing is

Not only would it weirdly explain why the fuck our beloved Sand Man Who Can't Fucking Swim is named after an animal known for swimming (like OP has weird fucking names, see; Smoker, Baby 5, Monkey D. Dragon, etc. What bugs me about Crocodile is the slightly contradictatory theming, but if he was named "Crocodile" by his merfolk parents, suddenly, it kind of works)

But also like. We know Crocodile fucking Hates the Government. And to be fair, there's plenty of reasons for anyone to hate the World Government, you don't need a personal grudge to hate them.

But if he had merfolk parents (who might be stuck living on the surface because they wouldn't have been able to get their child to Fishman Island without someone essentially delivering him there, 'cause he wouldn't have been able to just SWIM there), then there's a genuinely possibility said parent(s) could've ended up getting caught and turned into slaves. And boy would that give someone A Personal Fucking Grudge Against The Government

But also, due to the in-universe discrimination against merfolk, if Crocodile was part-merman it could mean he could've been harassed for it since a young age, or worse yet, could've become a target for slavers if anybody found out. And somehow, having to hide that part about his heritage would work really well into his trust issues

Not to mention, after escaping Impel Down, Croc and Jinbei have this brief convo (that turns racist) where Croc expresses his surprise over Jinbei being able to summon fish, having thought only merfolk could do that. Of course, Croc being a seasoned pirate and all you could totally expect him to like know about mermaid legends etc, but him having no knowledge about Fishmen is a bit odd. Especially because we know he's been to the New World, so you'd think he must've gone to Fishman Island at least once before? Although, his former Shichibukai Rights probably would've allowed him to cross over the Red Line through Marijois instead of having to pass through Fishman Island, but regardless, it's odd, is it not? But if Crocodile did have merfolk parents whom he got separated from at a young age?? Maybe he learned a thing or two about that side of his family, but never enough?? And then having to hide that side of his heritage could've left him just estranged????

Also IDK if it's worth anything but in the cover stories, we were introduced to our first mermaid Camie at the tail end of Alabasta, while the Miss Goldenweek coverstory ran during Water 7 where we meet Kokoro and Chimney. IDK it's a funny coincidence

I just

Could you fucking imagine

How fucking insane would that be, if Crocodile was part-merman