#to add on top of the whole autism and poor socialization skills and youve got the real workings of an uh oh sandwich

[honey-beezer]

Rewatched Moist & Magical and thinking about the gender of it all.

"I wanted to be a witch" "You cannae be a witch" "Why cannae I be a witch" "Because you're a boy. You can be a warlock or a wizard" "I want to be a boy witch"

Like initially the premise gets played off as a smart gender joke within the meta of the storytelling and becomes a major plot point along the way, but I can't stop thinking about it.

I don't want to be a boy or a girl, but some shade between and yet outside it all. I want to be a woman with a beard and long hair and gravel in my voice. I want to be a man in eye liner and a skirt and work boots laced tight. I feel some of my most feminine when I am wearing baggy, heavy clothes or building sets for a show. I still refuse to wear glasses that aren't that hipster square shape and made of dark material because it makes my face look more masculine. I dressed up as a vampire for halloween this year and looking into a mirror and seeing my high hairline and stubble poking through and the corset hugging me and my hair long and fluffy and a dark red lip and an open view of my chest that I don't hide from anymore and I felt so at home in my body in a way that I haven't in years. My relationship to gender not easy to figure out, and, as someone living in it, digesting it is laborious. And I don't expect everyone to get it; that's not the point. That was never the point. The crux of it all: Boys, if magical, can be ONLY a warlock or a wizard.

But I want to be a boy witch.