#tmi sorry but good god this book has had a death grip on me since I read it

[yourleftpinkytoe-blog]

Happy three year anniversary to my aftg obsession. I hope you never leave me <3

[evilsapphyre]

Sapphy’s Spoilerific Review

Season 7 Episode 4

In case the title isn’t specific enough, this will be a very spoiler-filled review for Game of Thrones.

You have been warned!

Okay, so I'm a bit behind.

I mean, I watched the episode when it came out a week and a half ago, but for inexcusable reasons, I failed to write my updates. My bad, my lovely people.

So, traveling back in time, in a world where we haven't seen Episode 5, we will begin!

First, we find ourselves at Highgarden. Our intrepid Ser Jaime, who seems like he may be actual Jaime and not Pod-Jaime, inspects the gold that has been taken from the now defunct House Tyrell. (RIP, Olenna, once more.) He takes a sizeable chunk to hand off to our favorite sellsword, Bronn of the Blackwater. Bronn calls Jaime out on his funky attitude, but Jaime fails to comment on it. (I highly doubt it’s because he’s mourning what Olenna did to his psycho-son Joff.) Bronn gets a good sting in about the peaceful nature of Jaime’s dear sister’s reign. Hmm, maybe that’s the real sticking point in Jaime’s craw? Anyways, we cut back to King’s Landing where Cersei is still wooing the skeevy guy from the Iron Bank. It’s all – money, money, money. He again lavishes Cersei with praise about how she is truly Tywin’s heir. You can smell the false flattery from the other side of the television. After all, he’s trying to butter her up to borrow more money, so they can collect more interest. Oh, and she brings up the Golden Company with him. Because nothing but the best hired swords to help defeat your enemies. (Again, I doubt that the significance of the Golden Company from the books will translate to the show, on account of the fact that they don’t really go into any of the Blackfyre conspiracies.) Up in Winterfell, Meera comes to say goodbye to Bran, who continues his newfound laconic nature to upset his would-be girlfriend. She accuses him of not caring about anything, and confirms that by admitting that he’s dead inside. Littlefinger interrupts their break-up, and Meera runs off back to her family in The Neck. Littlefinger tries to bribe Bran with a shiny dagger that once upon a time was used to try and kill him. Bran then unnerves Littlefinger, maybe, by quoting his words that he said to Varys years ago “Chaos is a ladder”. Meanwhile, also in Winterfell, Arya returns home, only for none of the new guards to believe her when she says who she is. It doesn’t help that she’s not really in the know of the who’s who of Winterfell these days, except that her brother Jon is supposed to be King. When she learns Sansa is in charge while Jon is away, she is able to use that information to get at least into the Courtyard, but Tweedle Dee and Dum guarding her don’t pay very good attention to her, and she slips away. The guards report this to Sansa, and she is able to deduce from Arya’s outdated knowledge that it is likely her sister, and knows where to find her. And of course, Arya is exactly there, in the crypts, staring at a statue of their father. The sisters bicker in jest before embracing. Both evade details of what they have gone through, but Arya does confess to having some kind of murder bucket list. Sansa doesn’t believe her, but when they go to visit Bran under the Weirwood tree, Bran confirms that it’s actually real. (Sorry, Sansa, your siblings did get a bit weird in their abroad studies.) Bran also bestows the dagger on Arya before all three return back to the castle proper. Brienne and Podrick watch them from across the courtyard, and Pod tells Brienne, “Job well done!” Of course, Brienne is all humble, and truthful in admitting that she didn’t really do much for two-thirds of the Stark Bunch, but at least this time, she doesn’t dispute being called a Lady. Over in Dragonstone, Dany and Missandei are having some much-needed girltalk. I guess? I don’t know. I’m not really one to share those kinds of personal details with my boss, or even my friends. It’s called TMI for a reason. Anyways, Jon thankfully interrupts them and takes Dany to the Cave of Wonder… I mean, Dragonglass. After she gets over the shock of seeing all the shiny black rock, Jon points out all the painstakingly drawn carvings amongst them. Since Jon isn’t covered in white chalk, or rock dust, I’m guessing that he didn’t draw them. Which is a shame. That would have been pretty damn funny. Anyways, Dany stares at awe in the drawings, especially the very good rendition of the White Walkers, and she almost seems convinced. Almost. She even stares at Jon with moon eyes as she tells him that she’ll defend the North. Once he bends the knee. It’s back to the same old song and dance, even if she tries to appeal to Jon by saying don’t let his pride kill a bunch of people. It resonates with him since he once said the same thing to another would-be King, but it’s also kind of a pot meet kettle moment. They leave the cave to find out the bad news from Casterly Rock and the Reach. Dany’s no longer feeling so moon-eyed, but she wants Jon to give her some advice, and he does. Whether she’s going to listen to him… Well, who knows?

Circling back to Winterfell, we’re treated to more Brienne. And without Tormund leering at her! She’s continuing to school Pod on the art of swordsmanship when Arya decides that she wants to have some training lessons too. After all, she wants to learn from the woman who beat the Hound. Brienne obliges her, but first tells her that Needle is too small. Arya’s bravado from Bravos comes roaring out when she promises to not cut Brienne. It’s easy to tell that Brienne is holding back at first, but when Arya starts showing off and annoying her with her water dancing skills, Brienne kicks Arya square in the chest and off her feet. It’s on like Donkey Kong then, and Arya’s ferocity comes out for all to see, including her sister Sansa and Littlefinger who have stopped along the battlements to watch. The sparring comes to a draw, and can I point out that Arya pulled out the Valyrian steel dagger on Brienne? Brienne wasn’t using Oathkeeper, clearly. It’s just a bit odd that she’d draw a blade like that on Brienne, even if she did turn it away. Despite my tiny bit of ire there, the sparring scene is fun to watch, even if Sansa didn’t agree. I’m not sure if she’s worried about her sister, or worried that her sworn knight may be serving her sister as well. Littlefinger seems to be enjoying the possible division though.

We cut back to Dragonstone where Davos and Jon are talking about Dany’s many obvious qualities. They ask Missandei some questions about Dany, and she paints a pretty picture of the life Dany has secured for at least Missandei. Their conversation is interrupted by Theon, who gets the same treatment as every other male (save Tyrion) who has come in contact with his sister Sansa lately. I wish that he would have actually brought up Theon’s awful betrayal of Robb. You know, Robb. The brother that died at the Red Wedding. (I miss you, Robb!) Theon wants to talk to Dany about rescuing his sister, but apparently Dany’s not home….

Speaking of home, Jaime’s almost back to his second home, King’s Landing. Lord Sternly Tarly lets Jaime know that all the gold has made it into the city, and oh yeah, can he flog the stragglers? Jaime tells him, no, best not without warning, and Sternly rides off muttering to himself about having no fun. Bronn makes fun of Dickon’s name, just like a twelve year old, but the rest of the conversation is cut short by the sound of encroaching thunder. Wait, that’s not thunder, it’s a Dothraki Horde!

And here come Dany on Drogon!

I must say, that I was gripped by this battle. My firm adoration of Jaime (thanks to his book character) had me still rooting for his side as the dragon-poser-wyvern roasted his troops and supplies. Except, I love dragons, and even though Drogon is a poser, this was the kind of dragon versus an army scene that I’ve yearned to see. I was right there with Jaime and Bronn, and I was there with Dany as she swooped around on her child. I was even worried for Drogon when he took the bolt to his shoulder.

But then all bets were off when Jaime charged at Dany after she was grounded. What the hell are you doing, Jaime?!?!?! You can’t do this! It’s suicide! THINK OF BRIENNE FOR GOD’S SAKE!!

At the last second, Bronn knocks Jaime away before Drogon can roast him alive, knocking him into the river… And Jaime starts to sink to his presumable death.

I’ll admit, even though I feel Jaime has so much more story to give, that I’m fearful for him. What if they felt that this was a fitting end? What if there is no more Jaime? What if Brienne ends up with Tormund?!

I just… I’m distraught just thinking about it.

Sunday better rush it’s ass here!