#tl; dr you won't be fulfilled by that; you just think you will.

[fideidefenswhore]

teenage dream (2023), olivia rodrigo / the spanish princess (2020) / the private lives of the tudors, tracy borman (2016) / the six queens of henry viii (2016) / the vaux passional / the six wives of henry viii (2001) / the lovers who changed history (2014) / blood, sex & royalty (2022) / blood, sex & royalty (2022), gif @fabledenigma / the cross (2014) 

[caffichai]

Food Bank Fundraiser

Hi everyone!

First of all, I want to say thanks to everyone who's been leaving such nice tags/comments on stuff I've posted! It's been really encouraging (o^▽^o)

Anyway, I think we all know it's very dark days on the economic front for many of us. So as such, I'd like to help raise some funds for Food Banks Canada! In exchange for you making a donation to the food bank, I will draw a character suggestion!

I know this is not really the sort of thing I normally do or post here but... many folks are struggling to put food on the table right now, and the food bank is a source of support for many and provides an absolute necessity. I've seen many people struggling in my own city, and food security has become an even bigger issue than it already was in the last couple of years with the food bank struggling to keep up with demand. Of course, food security is an issue across the whole country that's putting a huge strain on food banks, with nearly 5% of the entire population making use of food banks monthly, and 23% of the population reporting food insecurity (CBC, 2024; Global News, 2024). Unsurprisingly, those who are already most disadvantaged suffer the effects of food scarcity even more (Statistics Canada, 2023). To make matters more desperate, Canada's food bank system is on the brink of collapse (CTV News, 2024).

I know this isn't going to something big enough to change the world or anything, but being able to make even a small impact for individual people is important too!

✨Incentives✨

Of course, I'm sure people aren't just in it for a reward, but rewards make things all the sweeter, right?

For those who want to contribute, I'll take a character suggestion and add it to a poll (depending on the number of contributors, it may be split up into multiple polls), and then I'll draw as many as I can from top to bottom ranking! If you contribute, please send me a DM with your donation receipt and your character idea! They won't necessarily all be drawn in the same style, and they'll be done according to how much time I've got. (I know that commissions are probably the biggest incentive, but realistically, I struggle to get them done quickly and they're probably not that affordable to everyone)

If you prefer SFW or NSFW, you can let me know (But NSFW will be posted to Cohost). If you make a bigger contribution, I'll reach out to you and ask if you wanna see more specifics/details in your piece. How's that for sweetening the pie? :3

For those who can't make a donation (which is completely understandable), simply spreading the post is also helpful, and I appreciate that greatly as well!

Don't forget that giving a donation allows you to get a tax break based on the amount donated as well!

Alternatives?

If you'd rather donate to your own local food bank, that's great too! You can DM me and send me a pic of your receipt and I'll still add your suggestion to the poll.

If you REALLY want a commission, you can also DM me and I'll do my best to fulfil it! I won't be taking commissions for this till/if there's at least a couple of items on the poll though. The proceeds will go to my own local food bank. The commission will be done later though, and may take some time to fulfil. I take payment only after starting.

When do we start??

I guess once there's a good number of poll options? I have no idea how long that will be, but rest assured I'll keep you updated!

Where do we contribute?

You can make your donation to Food Banks Canada! They really need it!

Alternatively, you can make a donation to your local food bank or equivalent charity.

Other Questions?

Feel free to send me a message or an ask! I'll get back to you ASAP. If I need to include more details or clarify something, let me know! It's my first time doing this!

TL;DR

I want to help raise money for food banks! Anyone who contributes to Food Banks Canada (or donates to their own local food bank or equivalent charity) can DM me with their receipt and give a character to add to the poll. Poll characters will be drawn in order of their ranking, as many as I can manage, over as long a period of time as I can manage!

No pressure to donate of course, I just figured this would be a fun way of raising a bit of money to help out, and allow us to donate more than what I personally can

Current Contributor Count: 13

Suggested Characters:

Imagine your beloved, obscure or popular character here on this poll list! Oooooooh, how lucrative :3

Total funds raised:

780.36$!!!

[thewertsearch]

@manorinthewoods asked: Vriska and Eridan have now killed one person each. Tavros and Feferi's respective moons have been destroyed; as such, they cannot be revived via dream selves or the moon-crypt slabs. What do you think will happen now? ~LOSS (18/5/24) @manorinthewoods asked: Welcome to Murderstuck, aka Homestuck's version of Canaan House. Who do you think's going to survive this? ~LOSS (22/5/24) Anonymous asked: tavros and feferi are D----EAD! do you think they'll stay dead? you've already stated your opinion that there are death flags like crazy all over vriska, so do you think anyone else will die? if so, who? Anonymous asked: Now that the bodies have started to hit the floor, what's your prediction for who's gonna survive to meet the humans?

I'm actually doing to do something a little different this time, and analyze the situation primarily from an author's perspective, rather than an in-universe one. I had a lot of fun doing that with yesterday's Kanaya post, so I want to try it again.

Let's enumerate the remaining trolls, in ascending order of how likely I think they are to kick the bucket (😳) during Murderstuck.

There's no chance whatsoever that Sollux will die. His Doom prophecy is fulfilled, and if he were to die a third time, it would break his long-established duality theme. Plus, he'd have predicted it, and would have been complaining about it since Hivebent. He's fine.

Death flag score: 0/10.

We just got Aradia back. She's not even involved in Murderstuck, seemingly travelling to the Furthest Ring after being resurrected, so none of the murderers can touch her anyway.

Aradia is a powerful time manipulator who can freeze even the most dangerous enemies. It would take a lot more than Eridan and Gamzee to defeat someone who can stalemate Perfect Jack, and I predict that she'll survive the rest of the Act with ease.

Plus, killing her again so soon would feel really cheap. Been there, done that.

Death flag score = 0.5/10

Karkat and Terezi are too important to die.

This doesn't always guarantee a character's survival - A Song of Ice and Fire comes to mind - but ASOIAF kind of proves my point, doesn't it? Martin can throw all the Red Weddings he likes at us, but everyone still kind of knows that the really important characters aren't going to die until their arcs are complete. If A Dream of Spring ever actually comes out, Daenerys will still be around, and you can take that to the bank.

So no, I don't think Karkat and Terezi will be going anywhere. Now that Kanaya appears to be dead, they're undeniably the most important trolls remaining, alongside Vriska. And we'll get to Vriska.

Death flag score: 1/10.

I know it's weird to predict that an already deceased character won't die, but I wrote an entire post last night about why I believe this to be the case.

tl;dr: it doesn't make narrative sense for Kanaya to stay dead.

Death flag score: 2/10.

Now, we're onto the characters who I think might actually die.

Gamzee's still alive at the end of the countdown, so he'll at least survive the next couple of hours.

Certainly, his position seems rather precarious. His stated intent to wipe out the entire Veil will make him a lot of enemies very quickly - and based on the image above, he clearly gets into some sort of trouble. That scratch almost looks like it could be the work of Jack's sword.

However, I have a hard time believing the Most Important Character In Homestuck is going to die less than halfway through Homestuck. He's been saying all sorts of cryptic nonsense lately, and he strikes me as someone whose role in the story will expand even more than it already has. Gamzee is the one character on this list we know will stay relevant for the entire comic.

I don't think he's going to achieve his murder mission, of course. I think he'll probably be 'defeated' somehow, and expelled from the Veil by the surviving trolls, only to pop up again sometime later. There's still a chance that he'll be killed - but if he is, I'm 100% sure that he'll return in some form. Gamzeesprite would be even worse than Calsprite, in my opinion.

Death flag score: 3/10.

Yes, I still believe Vriska will die - but I don't know if she'll die in Murderstuck.

Scratch positioned her as someone who will perpetuate a monumental, large-scale mistake, and I don't think there's anything she could do on the Veil that fits the bill.

However, Vriska is more imaginative than I am. She could easily pull a trick out from up her sleeve that I didn't see coming - some terrible, horrible idea that earns all of Scratch's foreshadowing in one fell swoop. Vriska is known for her Incidents, and you never know when the next one is on the horizon.

Death flag score: 4/10.

There's not a lot tying Equius and Nepeta to the Veil, is there?

They don't have strong relationships any of the remaining trolls, and even among the B-team, they've barely had any prominence since we've left Alternia. Killing one or both of them would up the stakes of Murderstuck without introducing the narrative issues that, say, a dead Karkat would cause.

Plus, if one of them dies, then the other would immediately gain an incredibly strong motivation, and become a more prominent character overnight. I already like Nepeta - but a heartbroken, vengeful Nepeta hunting Eridan down across time and space? That's a fucking arc.

They could also both die, and return to the story from another direction. It hasn't escaped my notice that almost all the 'important' trolls are Prospit Dreamers, and the two Furthest Ring explorers are Derse girls. I've been wondering for a while now if the solution to the Veil's bloated cast is to split the trolls back into the Red and Blue Teams, with the Red Team joining the kids outside the session, and the Blue Team joining Aradia in the Ring for some secondary mission. I guess that implies Tavros will be resurrected, but there do seem to be hints that that might happen.

I don't want either of these two to die, but... well, killing them would raise a lot of interesting possibilities.

Death flag score (both of them together): 6/10

Death flag score (one of them) : 7.5/10.

Eridan is screwed.

Neither the story nor the trolls can allow him to ally with Jack and lead him to the Veil, and they'll do anything they can to stop him. I don't think anyone's inclined to show him mercy, either - Kanaya and Feferi were very popular.

I don't really see any way out for him. He has no allies, he can't Hopesplode everyone at once, and he's never shown himself to be particularly resourceful. I think if there's one troll practically guaranteed to be Murderstucked, it's him.

Death flag score: 9/10.

[kkotda]

HAPPY BIRTHDAY KKOTDA (DEAR-KOI) ˖°𓇼

for a month with so little notable (national - us) holidays, august sure is a busy month for dear-koi (both this blog and i have our birthdays in august!). to celebrate, i am planning on opening rolling slots for art requests! it'll be on a first come first served basis. i will close requests on september 1, 2024 (no more requests will be accepted when september starts)

what this means:

all of my followers, mutuals or not, are eligible to participate! please no requests sent with anonymous! they will not be honored! (i don't plan on publically posting requests unless given explicit permission! so please allow images in your ask box or dms open!)

please continue reading to learn how to participate and other important rules!

how to participate:

in an ask (or dm if we're mutuals), tell me what you'd like! character only art and selfship are the ones i'm most comfortable doing, but i'm willing to hear out other requests (oc's for example). maximum of 7 requests (characters) per person are allowed! note: you will not need to provide me with any sort of monetary compensation in order to participate! i will not accept any monetary compensation! (i don't have the means to do so). this is supposed to be all in good fun, to practice and develop a style i think suits me! so taking money for making your request a guinea pig would make me feel all types of guilty (if you really feel the need, tell me your favorite song(s)! i'm always open to new music! better yet, donate to a palestinian family!) for selfship art requests, please also include a picrew from which i can color pick (i.e. the more accurate the picrew's colors are, the more personable it can be!) and reference poses. if the picrew is not accurate, please feel free to provide preferred hex codes or color 'swatches'! vague descriptions like dark brown aren't very helpful and might make the situation uncomfortable (though i will of course honor any changes that are needed!). i will honor character requests from any media even if i am not a part of said fandom group! (i will ask for no idol/celebrity requests though because i am uncomfortable with that, sorry in advance for any inconvenience!) for oc art, please provide as many details, references, picrews as possible. i absolutely do not want to mess something as precious and valuable as an oc up. i will try my very best to fulfill your request to fit the image you had in mind! tl;dr: give me so much information i have to spend days reading (also i forgot to say this but if you'd like a background that isn't white, you're more than welcome to change the color! transparent is also an option!)

ok to draw:

people (characters, etc), small animals (like pets), sfw (suggestive is also okay with enough reference pictures!), chibi

not ok to draw:

nsfw (i'm not that good yet, i'm sorry T-T), gore/horror, overly complicated things (i'll let you know if it gets too complicated)—basically just ask, and i will tell you!

please keep in mind:

i am slowly getting back into drawing (but i was never good in the first place tbh...) so i'm still very much learning! my art style currently is still a lot of mimicking (i do not use fanart as references, please don't misunderstand!!!), and as such i will ask you all to keep your expectations very very low T-T like rock bottom low...

default art will have a white background! i can and will color if colors are provided! (but there won't be any crazy good rendering, i'm sorry ;-;)

the purpose of this event is me practicing and learning art, but it's also me giving back to my beautiful friends who make the world go round! thank you so much for trusting me with your request(s) and i will do my utmost to make it come to life! if you'd like a 'portfolio' of sorts, please search the lovekoi tag! it is my art tag that i'm using and all of my stuff will be there (there's not a whole bunch though unfortunately >.<)

if you have any questions, please ask! i feel like i've left out a lot of things...

and finally, some parting words:

dear-koi has come a really long way i think. i moved here on a whim and essentially lost all of my previous mutuals (i should've just shared the url... </3) but you all found me again! and new people found me too! i'm so honored to have been worthy of the follow to following transition, you guys will not believe the squeals every time people i've looked up to like big time became mutuals with me... it's still crazy to me actually... but that aside, thank you for spending my birthday and dear-koi's 1st anniversary with me! here's to many more!

i love you all, please remember to smile today ᰔᩚ

[veespee]

Vinnie is *such* a complex character i feel. And he makes me feel very conflicted, but here are some (personal) opinions about him: (kinda an analysis? idk i'm just rambling)

-Firstly, he's the voyeur, although unknowingly. The word “voyeur” has two meanings, the first one is.. we won't talk about it, but the *second* one is: a person who enjoys seeing the pain or distress of others. Now, i don't really think he actually likes seeing people in pain. Of course, he shows remorse and guilt over the deaths of his close ones, and even people he didn't know that where victims, so why voyeur? Why would HABIT describe him as a “voyeuristic fuck”?

So, i may be getting some lore wrong, and i apologize in advance, but it's revealed that he has led everyone to their deaths, due to his insistence to keep filming and find answers. Also, if i remember right, he had intentionally left out footage that caused him to be seen in a bad light, and it showed that he had led Jeff and Alex to their doom.

-Now, of course for any sane person, why would someone do that? The answer is… well, for answers. That's the word he seems to be infatuated with, ’answers’. And it's made pretty clear. He saw what HABIT was doing, he saw the state Evan was in, and he knew. He was fully aware, he's not stupid, and he knew what he was doing. If Evan wasn't going to do what Vinnie was telling him to, then… he was going to summon HABIT. He was also aware of HABIT's intelligence/experience with the human race, which was good for him, since he was going to get his questions answered.

-Now’s the trick question (for me at least), is Vinnie a horrible person? Well… yes, and no? I mean, he did do horrible things, that much can be said. He led everyone to doom, he purposefully ignored people's wishes (Evan's request for Vinnie not to upload the video about Jesse's grandmother dying), and of course, continuing to record after all of these things happened, despite Jeff's and Evan's wishes. But he feels incredibly guilty. “Sometimes you gotta do stuff that you don't agree with, but that's the price you pay. But you gotta remember, sometimes the price is too steep, and you just can't live with yourself... I'm sorry... I'm so sorry to everyone that I've hurt, to everyone that has died, around me or because of me.” (these are his own words).

I honestly believe he's a very, very flawed character. His goal is answers, and he will do anything to get them. He has the drive to get what he desperately wants, even after being tortured by HABIT. And i feel that HABIT has some respect for him because of that. And of course, his role was set from the start. Everything was calculated, and he was fulfilling his role, “the voyeur”, “the guardian”, whatever it may be. Everything happened for a reason, the God Killer was created, Vinnie's “purpose” was completed. I guess he could be described as a pawn, a follower that was blinded by his desperation for knowledge and control, but fell into the traps of the bigger entities at play.

thank you for reading! i apologize if i got any characteristics wrong, i just wanted to get my thoughts out. and this is very yap-y, so here's a TL;DR:

Vinnie is a complex ass character, who's blinded by his search for control and answers. He's guilty and self loathing, but avoids responsibility. Basically… opinions vary about him, you either love him or hate him.

[yamatenzo]

karin is my meow meow princess who was born in a cardboard box all alone and most people write her off as her character just being "sasuke obsessed" which i actually do understand because its not like kishimoto put much effort in there now did he. but i actually love her because (and this is personal to me) once you start seeing her whole situation with her body being used by everyone and her believing it's what gives her worth as an allegory for abuse it reframes So much of her behavior because imho? the way she acts towards sasuke is So painfully real LOL

like here's the thing about karin and i'm fully gonna subscribe to her tsukuyomi dream episode here because i think it's visceral, rough as hell and good: what she craves the most is Love she doesn't care if she's used up as long as it's by someone she believes is worthy of her love- again, subscribing to her tsukuyomi dream, girl it fucking ends with her asking for love as she's DYING isn't it so fucked up (but extremely interesting character wise) that THAT'S her ideal world? she doesn't even receive the words of love she is asking for, she just makes the request openly and to her that's enough like. THAT'S HEARTBREAKIIIIING

and back to this idea of craving love, i think she's conditioned herself to believing what she wants is that idealized romantic love where someone Needs her (even if she might end up being thrown away or become obsolete- a very insanely sad way to think of yourself) but if you Fully observe karin back from the time she had her mother still to when she meets naruto and says, if memory serves, she feels a Warmth to him that makes her happy, that what she really wants is a place to belong that is like family... i wish they'd given any payoff on the naruto thing but oh well lol. something i'll actually give boruto props for is karin (orochimaru aside) seems very happy and fulfilled to have found a spot with taka as her family as she says 🥺...

anyway tl;dr karin's character, if you ask me, is (or rather Should Have Explicitly Been) about longing for the love of a family that won't need to use you or throw you away no matter what

[polyamorousmood]

Hi I need some advice.

So I identify as poly even tho ive never had a poly relationship before and made that very clear to my girlfriend before we started dating. She said she was fine with it, and that we could always discuss terms when I start to like another person. We've been dating for a year, and I'm starting to like one of our mutual friends. I was excited to tell my girlfriend, but when I did she freaked out about it and said she couldn't do it. Because she was freaking out, I said it was OK and agreed to be in a mono relationship (I often will say anything to get someone to calm down, and I know that's a flaw of mine which is why I was open about everything before anything was at stake). I don't think I am OK with it, but they way she spoke about it sounds like she won't be convinced either.

I feel like I was lied to? And now I'm in this situation I didn't want, but I don't want to break up with her because I do love her. Functionally our relationship is the same as it always was so maybe I can handle it, but I just don't understand why she would have such a negative reaction when she seemed completely OK with it at the beginning.

I mean... maybe she said it was okay when it wasn't for a similar reason you did? Because she wanted to make you happy more than she wanted to dig into the issue? While I understand this probably felt like a major gut-punch after you made a point to be open about it, it seems to me unfair you'd hold her to a higher standard than you're holding yourself now wrt voicing what you'd be okay with.

Anyway, TL;DR: I think y'all both need to "come to Jesus."

What do I mean by that.

You need the classic Uncle Iroh moment

And it really, really fucking sucks, but you both will have to consider if the life you want -- poly for you, monog for her -- is feasible with each other. I'm sorry, I know it hurts even to think about, but even if everything gets worked out, you will have to think about the possibility it won't first.

First, you're going to have to bring it up again, and explain its importance, and explain your confusion, and acknowledge this is clearly difficult for her. I think a strong possibility is that she's okay with you dating someone else, but not someone she knows. It being her friend may be the sticking point! I've found a lot of people don't consider that a possibility until they're confronted with it, and it drudges up a lot of bad feelings and anxieties that you "always really wanted them and not me," so that's worth investigating.

... Its also really possible she never gave it a ton of thought and assumed it was never really gonna happen🫤. Its also possible your timing was just shit in a way you're not mentioning (maybe didn't even think of!) like, if you mentioned it a week after y'all Had A Talk™️about her feeling really insecure lately, I can see how that could cause her some panic. You are just going to have to grit your teeth and talk🗣️. It is the ONLY path forward that has a chance of everyone feeling fulfilled. Which to me at least, makes it the only path forward, period ⏺️ It sucks. Its hard. You'd rather saw off your toes.

But here's the secret -> people regret more the things they didn't do than the things they did do. A life spent wondering is generally much harder than anything else.

So if after you talk to her, she does have a problem with polyamory, there are only a few options for how this shakes out:

You never get the polyamory. Either because you kept your mouth shut 🙊 or because you asked and it was clearly never going to be okay with her. You stay with her forever and cut off this desire of yours to make her happy. Most poly people find this a very constricted existence.

She consents to polyamory even though she doesn't like having to share you. You guys broker some sort of compromise. Maybe she comes around, but maybe its always a sore spot, and she always feels like she's settling for half a relationship.🌗

You break up💔. Maybe now, maybe after years of trying and failing to do one or both of the first two options.

That's all there is. There's room within those categories, of course, but every outcome is one of those three. Give each of them their fair consideration, because there are some major, long-term pros and cons with each of them, and you need to know what you're signing on for. Oh, and if you're not willing to talk about it? You're locking yourself into the first one. Maybe she's worth it to you, but if that's the choice you're making, you cannot hold that choice against her later, because she won't even have realized you made it if you don't talk about it.

And if you do broker some sort of deal, you better fasten your seatbelt. Because you will have to talk about things she's uncomfortable with very regularly. Accept that right the fuck now. You know its true. You know that even if she understands, there will be new situation after new situation you will have to go through together. And a lot of them will be hard on her. And it will be on your shoulders to see her through.

This is, without exaggeration on my part, one of the worst situations to be in ever. My heart goes out to you.💝 I hope from the depths of my soul there's some sort of misunderstanding that gets resolved without much drama, and you're all okay. I am also truly sorry if that sounded harsh, but I don't want you to waste your time looking for miracle fixes. Everything from this point on will be messy and labor-intensive, but I hope it can be a labor of love.

Wising you the strength to see yourself to a life you love 💙💖🖤

[bridgetoesoteria]

🔥🐉Messages for 2024🔮✨

Sorry for the delay 😅 Got a bit carried away yesterday.

There are three decks for three piles, left to right. Each pile also gets two bonus affirmations to start their year 🥳.

Asking for messages/ what you need to know heading into 2024! Hope it resonates <3

Pile 1: Rider-Waite

Off the bat: I am getting something about your love life. It could be prominent for the first 3 months of this year.

Be less tense. Maybe get into yoga or pilates or something similar. Some people might enjoy strength training.

4 Card Spread: Ace of Swords, Wheel of Fortune, 9 of Cups (R), High Priestess. Bottom of deck is Queen of Wands.

I can see why some of you may be tense. I think you have a lot going on. In particular, there could be a toxic situation or individual you have been dealing with. I almost want to say managing. It won't be a relationship for all of you. It could be any domineering masculine figure in your life or a job situation. I'm saying this because right under the Queen of Wands is the Devil and a few other negative cards, bookended by the King of Wands.

Anywho, despite that I am getting a positive message for you heading into 2024. I kept hearing that "you know the truth." So I don't know if someone has been trying to gaslight you or if you are learning to trust your intuition. Either way, you only benefit from trusting what you know in your gut is the truth of a person or situation.

You are much more resilient than you may know. Or maybe you are just tired of having to be resilient (i feel that). I think that is going to motivate you to start taking more control of your life. I'm not a doctor and if you are feeling depressed, or just not okay emotionally, please reach out to someone for help. With the 9 of cups reversed, some of you may be feeling super unfulfilled, disappointed, and despondent.

The Wheel of Fortune is next to it however, it is my "things are looking up," card. So I see the lack of fulfillment changing. For some this may require you learning how to be more "selfish" or getting rid of a person with a selfish attitude! I see you giving them the boot and them just swirling away like they're being flushed 🚽 lol. These changes may even benefit you financially.

TL;DR: So I guess the overall message is to stand in your power. Remember you are that bitch/guy/person. Or at least you can be if you so choose. Better boundaries and less need for external validation will bring you a lot of peace. You know the truth and the right thing to do. You can trust your intuition

Pile 2: Lucid Dreams Beginners Tarot

Off the bat: You could feel a little scatter brained right now. You might feel like your mind is buzzing and there is a lot to do! Slow down a little so you don't mix things up. I almost grabbed the wrong deck for your pile. Double check everything. Don't lose shit!

You may want to meditate.

4 Card Spread: The Tower, The Fool, Ten of Pentacles, and Queen of Pentacles. Bottom of deck is Seven of Swords.

You know...just as I was beginning to shuffle, I got a message about the soft life. Maybe you should allow yourself to be pampered and blessed more. Not just by people but the universe and yourself.

Also, are there scammers in this pile cause I'm getting some finessing energy 🤣. If you are living a city girl type of life, tread carefully. Just giving this warning because of the 7 of swords and Tower. But you seem to think quick on your feet so you will be good. Work hard but keep your hands clean. You want to build a lasting dynasty.

For others, you could be planning a wedding or planning to elope. Maybe some of you are actually reconsidering marriage all together. It doesn't feel negative but more like, you feel you need more time on your own. Maybe a recent success at work or another area of life has you wondering about the health of the grass just yonder 🤔. Should you follow your heart or stay where you are? I don't know just don't do anything crazy and focus on your legacy/long-term goals.

I can't ignore all the pentacles. In some way, money and foundations are important. This could be related to your family, legacy, inheritance, career, etc. There is emphasis on your physical world. Some of you could be going against family traditions or in some way stepping out on your own. You feel ready to carve out your own path and it is hard to hold it in any longer.

Some of you could go back to an ex or someone you are separated from. For others, that could be the very thing you are rebelling against. I'm hearing "who said I have to choose you?!" You could just now be realizing that you have autonomy and the feeling is intoxicating. There is a male energy present. I can't tell if this is a family member or significant other. Be wary of this person. They are a bit stuck in their ways.

TL;DR: You want to take life by the horns. You feel so ready for it! I feel like it could have been a long time coming for many of you. See what it feels like to be free. Just don't get too carried away! Be wary of the intentions behind people wanting to sway you from your decisions. Keep focusing on your bag and carrying yourself with grace. Maybe you will make some mistakes but maybe they will be make for awesome memories! For some of you, marriage or long term partnership could be on the mind heavily.

(three wanted to come out so I rolled with it).

Pile 3: Muppet Bear Tarot

Off the Bat: I felt really chill starting this pile. I took a little break, had a laugh then came back to it. So maybe you are a little checked out and just going with your flow. The last few years may have been rough and all you want is quiet. As long as you are balancing your priorities, keep moseying down the lazy river of life ☮

Also, if you have been considering getting your first tarot deck...

🔆this is your sign🔆

There are plenty of budget and beginner friendly decks. Do some research then choose what you feel drawn to. Caution: Don't get too sucked into doing readings. I think many of us had that phase 😅

4 Card Spread: 8 of Wands, 5 of Cups, Queen of Pentacles, and Strength (R). Bottom of the deck is the World.

Again, I am getting the feeling that you are more focused on your day to day. You make sure your "home is in order," then you go off to your happy place. If this is not what you are doing, maybe this is encouragement to start. You could be mourning a loss, whether it is a person or a relationship. Or you could be feeling down for another reason. Its okay to do what you need to feel better. Maybe its a quiet night in with a cozy atmosphere or a solo trip.

In some way, releasing control will help propel you forward.

Some of you may be in a long-distance relationship and finally getting the chance to be together. For others, as you focus on healing yourself, you will naturally meet a love interest. Or an existing connection could unexpectedly develop into something romantic. I feel this person being emotionally safe for you. You are entering a new chapter in your life without even realizing it.

You may receive a message that you have been waiting on. Could be a DM, text, email, or even physical mail. Someone may have been sitting on it for awhile. I am not necessarily getting malice behind this delay even though it may be annoying.

There's definitely a chance for a fresh start. It could start slow but I have a feeling you won't mind that. This fresh start could somehow be related to you coming out victorious in a situation or just being "chosen."

Some of you may have family going to combat or returning from combat. I'm definitely getting a military undertone. This could be a young male that wants to make everyone proud. I think whoever that message resonates with will get it. For others, there could be a male who you would like to see do well.

TL;DR: Focusing on healing is the right thing to do. You have been through a lot so its okay to create your own safe space to reside in. Your blessings won't miss you. Even as you focus on yourself, good events and people will still find their way to you. Trust that the whatever high power(s) you believe in have got your back. You could experience rejuvenation in your romantic life. Also, a delayed message is coming through. Welcome to the next chapter of your life :). You deserve all the good karma headed your way this year. 🥰

Hope you loved your readings. May we all have a wonderful start to our 2024s 🥂🎇

~K

[dorkydegeneracy]

If some of you haven't noticed, I have never thought of myself as anti-Tommy or even anti-Bummy. That is not to say that I am in any shape of form anti-Buddie. I am most definitely Buddie till the day I die! But I don't want to participate in the whole bashing Tommy and BuckxTommy supporters thing that I see a lot in the fandom.

Now let me be clear. I don't give two flying fucks if you have a strong distaste for Tommy. It is absolutely within your right and I will not call you out for being petty or just sharing your dislike for the guy. I am American, and doing so would feel fucked up imo. In fact, as I am sure I've stated before, I don't think Tommy is written to be a likeable character, given his past and the fact that their relationship is seemingly only built on sexual attraction. Like many others, the guy does rub me the wrong way.

I'm just not going to bash the character primarily because I find his existence quintessential to Buck exploring his sexuality and ultimately to Buddie endgame.

Buck needs to understand what it means to be a bisexual man apart from Eddie because he already loves Eddie, but he's having trouble differentiating from the love associated with friendship and the type of romantic love associated with spouses. He can't do that with Eddie as his only measuring stick. This is Tommy's purpose.

It is clear to me that Tommy is purely a mechanism to 1) get Buck to understand that Tommy is not the answer (it's Eddie) and 2) to key Eddie into the idea that Buck is attracted to men and a valid option (once he goes through his own awakening). I tend to label a character who fulfills this role as a "plot device." It is not a slight on anyone who likes Tommy/Bummy. Have at it! I just choose not to root for a character who's only purpose is to ultimately be ushered out soon in favor of what I believe to be the ultimate goal of the show runners: Buddie.

TL;DR: Basically I'm Tommy neutral. Kinda? I find him to be unpleasant but I think he serves an important purpose so in that way he is cool. Idk. You definitely won't see me badmouth the guy (a fictional character mind you), or MORE IMPORTANTLY, anybody who enjoys seeing Buck in this new relationship.

[a-hell-of-a-time-archive]

New OC: Yukitaka

Note: This OC will be by request only, and I'll only be rp'ing as him with interested parties. He, like Caim will not be forced upon other rp'ers, and nor does anyone who interacts with Andrealphus need to interact/accept Yuki.

Honestly this is a self indulgent fankid that I want to test out.

Name: Yukitaka (meaning Noble Snow)

Nicknames: Yuki, hellspawn,

Parents: Andrealphus (father), Caim (mother), Yui (mother)

Age: Infant - toddler (main verse); 15 going on 16 (I Got Teleported To the Past to Fulfill My Destiny in Hell)

The following is for the I Got Teleported To the Past to Fulfill My Destiny in Hell verse

Orientation: Gay

Likes: fighting, swordsmanship, hanging out with his friends, festivals, soccer, parkour, snowboarding, Chikao (his boyfriend, a nekomata), the cold

Dislikes: Ryuu (rival, dragon youkai), goetian politics, the heat,

Occupation: Precautionary heir (illegitimate), next great marquis

Personality: (Note: This is a heavy WIP since he's a new OC that's still being fleshed out)

Loud, brash, brazen (a quick tongue that has gotten him into plenty of trouble) and confident to the point of arrogance are just some of the adjectives used to describe Yuki. He is not afraid to call things as he sees it, nor afraid to speak up for himself should the situation warrant it. He is equal parts of both parents when it comes to his attitude and fearlessness, caring little for the intricacies of goetian decorum in favour of pursuing his own interests.

He can be rash at times, especially when faced with something that catches his interests. He is known for getting swept up easily in his emotions and the adrenaline rush of a good fight, or the height of a soccer game, or when participating in sports that Caim has considered reckless and which threaten to put her in an early grave.

When it comes to his combat skills, Yuki is quite proud and fearless; he won't hesitate to challenge opponents stronger than him, and will meet any challenge head on. This has led to him often rushing in, sometimes without thinking, and ending up with more than his fair share of injuries.

Despite this, Yuki is highly intelligent, a good strategist and has a good heart that looks out for the people he cares for the most, such as his friends and family. He isn't one for injustice and if someone has wronged him or his loved ones, he won't hesitate to make things right or settle the score.

Tl;dr: This kid is a cocky little shit who is too smart for his own good and runs his mouth like nothing else. He's also the kid that will help you in a pinch while also threatening to fight any enemies of yours. Or anyone in general if they're strong enough. He may/may not value his own safety and is a bit too reckless.

He means well though.

History: Born to the Great Marquis, Andrealphus, and the former Great President of Hell, Caim, Yukitaka is a goetian with the blood of his tengu (youkai) ancestors running through his veins. His birth was shrouded in secrecy, and he spends most of his days living with his mothers just outside of Tokyo. He attends one of the local high schools and is the top student, as well as one of the stars of his school's soccer team.

Approaching his 16th birthday, Yuki awakened his cryokinetic powers, prompting Caim to reveal his goetian heritage. She also explained how, once he turns eighteen, Yuki will have to choose between following in his father's footsteps, or remaining in the human world.

To prepare for this future decision, Yuki started splitting his time between his father's mansion in Hell, and his family home in the human world. While at his father's he trains to master the demonic abilities inherited from his father, along with the ins and outs of goetian politics, all the while remaining hidden from the Ars Goetia at large. While in the human world, Yuki continues with his studies in the hopes of graduating high school with his friends.

Should he make the decision to follow in his father's footsteps, he would be initiated into the Ars Goetia, and his identity revealed to the nobility at large. Should he stay in the human world, he would have to continue living among humans and taking on mundane jobs all the while hiding his identity and abilities.

More TBA.

Powers/Abilities:

Cryokinesis: Can manipulate ice and snow for a wide variety of uses (offence - weapons; defence - shields; weather manipulation (can cause blizzards, drop the temperature to sub zero, etc.)

Extreme Speed: Can move as fast as any tengu, appearing as a blur to the untrained eye.

Swordsmanship

High endurance

Weapon of choice: Katana

Verses:

Normal Verse: Yuki is born and Andrealphus struggles to be a dad while hiding the child's existence from Paimon. Shenanigans ensue.

I Got Teleported To the Past to Fulfill My Destiny in Hell: Gusion (keeperofanswers) showed Andrealphus many books, each covering alternative lives based on choices made, and not. One of the books was triggered by magic, and Yuki manifested from its pages as if it were a portal. He is now living with his father in Hell while trying to figure out a way to get back to his own time.

[justanotherhh]

What if Striker got worse? What if he successfully assassinated someone. What if he does kill the rich? What if he realised his potential as an allophobic aspec who kills people? What if he got more fucked up, not less? I think it would be very fun

HEHEHEHEHEEHEEEE ALRIGHT REDEMPTION STRIKER HAS HAD HIS TURN LET'S GET INTO MY NO GOOD MEAN-SPIRITED "I HATE THESE ALLOS" SON!!!

when you think about it, Striker's not done anything soooo bad yet, not that he hasn't tried. he just keeps getting Foiled by that... foil, Blitzo! I think he deserves a win!

Ooh we need a more current death tragedy on this fucking show, I like a good tragedy, personally, and I think we're overdue another one. enough with the past fucking with us, what about new wounds? (this so won't happen shhhhh let me dream)

finale is all the royals gathered to determine Stolas' fate and Striker blows up the building can you imagine????? that's not even tragic, that's kind of based

Like, crucially, Striker still isn't wrong about a lot of his opinions, these royals have been fucking around with people for far too long!

Striker's growth is eventually no longer being thrown by people making sexual comments, now it just makes him angrier/more powerful. he is Fueled By Disgust!

allophobic Striker is the funniest thing, because it's practically canon, this man is done with your fucking romantic relationships getting in the way of the class war, with your sexual commentary, with all of it, he has decided simply to kill!

Striker who has no more ideals, he's gone full "burn it all down because why not at this point"

this is giving serial killer, and listen, we can debate "problematic representation" (a term that often loses meaning) until the cows come home, but we're two aspecs talking fantasy fulfillment, I think aspec characters should be allowed to kill because they're allophobic, I think it's really really funny as concept

I also think "more fucked up Striker" works thematically where we're at at the moment (to be more "what's going on in the show" for a second), we left him at a bleak place, whatever he does when he next appears I want it to be oh so fucked up

also, my boy deserves to do some fucked up shit simply As A Treat. he has dealt with this nonsense every episode he's in, can't a man threaten, and torture, and kill in peace these days? why is everyone so g-ddamn horny about it??? sometimes maiming doesn't have sexual subtext, it's just good ol' honest maiming!!!!!!!!!!

Striker doesn't need romantic fulfillment or the power of friendship, he just needs to stab someone, that's really all I want for him. A good, clean bit of violence, an episode where he wins and everyone else loses

We'll call it the "love loses" episode

the "I'm aroace so you can imagine how dangerous I am. I don't know how to marry or fuck, I only know how to kill" meme

TL;DR: SUPPORT STRIKER'S WRONGS!

[eldritch-spouse]

The Princes

After a deal is established between Krulu and Miara, the idea of creating offspring becomes slightly less abhorrent to Krulu, for a multitude of reasons, some of which he's not keen to admit.

Miara will tell him a lot of truths he needs to hear, a couple of these being particularly pleasing, such as:

Siadar have vastly stopped watching Earth. This means the banished is not in as much danger as he believes himself to be. There's no need to be as subtle as he currently is being, because ever since Earth became the equivalent of a "no-go" zone, he's in little to no danger of being found. He's in an isolated, abandoned instance, inside a system vastly abandoned by siadar. Mother is only there because she's a deviant looking for her fragment;

He has her protection. In the very unlikely scenario that something did go wrong and both of them would be found, Miara volunteers herself to not only protect, but also sacrifice herself for the offspring and possibly buy all of them enough time to escape. This is not being done for Krulu specifically, but rather for Admin, the shard. Miara wants to proportion nothing but the best for you and is driven with all her being to ensure that you live the most fulfilled life. Does Krulu like that having Mother's protection soothes him? No, fuck no. But he can't deny that it makes the idea of heirs more feasible, tangible, less stressful.

Why is Miara so keen on kids?

Simple, she's a fertility goddess. As a former matemaker, and a creator, she can't help but encourage procreation amongst those she cares for. You (Admin) yourself are extremely family-oriented (if you weren't before, you sure are now) as one of your longest lasting wishes to be impregnated by Krulu and bring his heirs into the world. This desire is in direct correlation with your soul's link to Miara.

Other than that, she's also very excited to see a possible new generation of monsters be created, as she's come to adore the "heretical" diversity of this planet.

Why is Krulu so against kids?

Tl;dr: Trauma.

The last thing he wants is to be found again, to have the few things he's relearned to love be ripped from his grasp, decimated anew. He wouldn't survive that, he'd enter such a nauseating level of hysteria, of mania, that his mental faculties would never recover and he'd scorch everything alive. This planet, his kind, himself. Just thinking about actually going through with it causes him grief and panic deep enough to make his chest ache. Naturally, as his vessel, this saddens you to no end.

Putting that major mental block aside, Krulu is also saddened by the possibility of passing on his wounds and "blemishes" onto the offspring, which is likely, since the extended period of time inside The Null altered his core, his genetics.

The "test run"

Belo is the first who gets to put a baby in you.

For several reasons, mainly that Krulu isn't ready to do it until much later, but this test run with Belo only serves to sway him in that direction. The idea is implanted in your head first by none other than Miara, who is very good at coming up with mildly creative, kinda bullshit solutions to a lot of problems. If Krulu won't grant you offspring just yet, why not coax him with the image of you swollen by Belo's child?

This is beneficial for a lot of reasons, mostly that there's little to no danger involved for Krulu or you. Plus, it's something the higher finds himself very aroused by. The pregnancy will be smoother, and everyone gets a chance to orient themselves towards a more familial dynamic. Belo himself is extremely honored to have this chance, and exists in shock for a great deal of its duration.

After the angel hybrid child is born, your recovery is given priority, as soon enough, you'll be welcoming Krulu's heir. This pregnancy is already vastly different, and a touch more risky. (I've detailed the basic gist of it before.)

The offspring

Put simply, the siblings are as follows:

Adelo (Prince of Eden) -> Belo and Admin's child. An angel hybrid with some odd shapes here and there. Little about them is humanoid, mostly because angels are some of the most untampered types of creations genetically speaking, it would take a lot of successive breeding with lessers to make extremely humanoid angels. A very playful person, masculine-presenting, hermaphroditic. This little bozo originally simply wanted to goof off and was content only having to perform small errands for his parents, the clergymen and so forth. Upon teenhood, he's told about some plans for Eden, and how Krulu wishes Adelo would become its ruler within time. Ever since then, he has strived to make his parents' vision become reality, no matter what.

Adrul (Prince of Perdition) -> Krulu and Admin's child. Retains a lot of his father's visage, though with the odd feature of a centipede-like lower body. Has been somewhat quiet and serious since childhood, in great contrast to his brother, though he's not incapable of humor. The hybrid didn't like to feel useless and would take on any role necessary, no matter how foreign it felt. He takes his mission to heart and swears to convert every demon, or kill them where they stand shall they refuse to honor Krulu. Although he may outwardly come off as intimidating and heartless, Adrul has a lot more empathy than his brother.

As princes, it's safe to assume both monsters suffer from some degree of loneliness and stress, imposed on them by the missions they have been encumbered with. If only there was someone who caught their eye, made life more bearable...

[firefromthegodspro]

NGL I know its a controversial scene, but I genuinely love the "Adult Kiss" scene from End of Eva.

Like I know some people say it's "Out of Character" for Misato but I ask you how???? Like half the entire series is hammering into you that this woman, despite having at least some form of familial love for Shinji, is entirely willing to toss both it and her morals aside to get him to pilot. Like this woman, multiple times, explicitly ignores the severe trauma piloting inflicts onto Shinji to guilt him into it because "he has to". So no, I do not think its OOC for her to offer an "Adult Kiss" to him on her deathbed if he gets into the Eva. She knows he's desperate for any sort of affection at this point and that it will get him to pilot so of course she'll toss aside morals and decency to do it.

And yes its disgusting, its awful, and that the point. You are supposed to look at this scene in horror and go "what the fuck is going on???" You're supposed to despise her for it, to thinks she's an awful human being, because she's explicitly offering a 14 year old the promise of sex (that she knows she will never be able to fulfill) if he will just get in the fucking robot again and this is a bad thing.

I won't speak to directorial intent because I A: am not in contact with Hideki Anno (despite fervently desiring to pick his brain about Shin Kamen Rider) B: do not speak Japanese so cannot read his interviews unless its through the lens of a (potentially flawed) translator and C: Am too fucking lazy to look up said interviews anyways. But I will say that, whether retroactively or not, Eva is a genuinely good commentary on the "Relatable Angsty Teenage Protagonist" because Shinji is incredibly relatable when he first shows up. Poor self-esteem, absent parents, issues connecting with people, etc. But as the series goes on and Shinji descends further and further to start to relate less and less and start to wonder "Why aren't any of these adults seeing. Why do they seem to miss or ignore the obvious traumas Shinji and Asuka have and why do they continue to push them to do something that only hurts them. Why don't they question the narrative, of why the teens are the only ones who can Pilot or whether its even true or not?"

TL;DR yes Misato is an awful human being, and yes just about everything she does in EoE is entirely in character for her

[ubercharge]

im not sure if anyone asked you yet, but thoughts on the dunmeshi anime?

thanks for asking! sometimes i forget i exist here as a person cuz i just log on to queue random stuff without making posts 💀

it's pretty rare for me to watch an anime without ever reading the manga, and there've been stellar adaptations recently. ONK, kisekoi, BTR, frieren, CSM just to name a few. in a landscape where we're used to being disappointed as readers who have a frame of reference before watching a show, i had very, very high hopes for the dunmeshi adaptations that weren't quite fulfilled.

i'll dump everything under a cut since i actually have a lot to say, sorry if you were expecting it to be brief 😎

the lines in the artistic style are good, nicely translating the characters into animated format. really no notes there. definitely a nicer comparison for char designs between manga and anime vs. tonsuki and tensura who both have incredible manga styles that the anime stumble over (though in the latter's case, i don't think they were aiming for it sadly)

the shading has been fine, but weakened by the colour choices. some of the dungeon scenes (e.g., living armour stuff) are lit with a medium blue which helps to sell the idea of the scene being in a place not lit by fire (and contrasts it with the making camp & cooking scenes), but the lack of dark shading flattens some of these very well-drawn images.

the earlier chapters don't have the same level of detail as newer ones, but the art style is still fantastic - it's expressive with high contrast and shows action and impact perfectly well. manga will often times have a naturally easier way with contrast due to it being in black & white, but i don't think that means anime should just give up on contrast in favour of playing ineffectively with colour.

here's a night shot of fern from frieren. the choices made here allow for the shading to stand out from the flats and give her more definition overall while still being relatively simple (just flats + shading)

when dunmeshi has more "normal" lighting conditions, it does a lot better. similar to fern up there, there's about the same amount of difference between the flats and shadows, so i really wish they did a better job on the dungeon scenes since they're going to have to deal with non-torchlit scenes plenty. i won't argue that the living armor scene certainly has some kind of a sickly, alien mood to it, but tl;dr i think it should've had darker shading if not also being less green. this largely applies to every other blue-green lit scene they've done.

looking at kui's coloured drawings in the ed gives me an idea of what could've been and it makes me sad to lose out on colour choices more similar to that (even if they obviously can't have her level of detail on top of it)

some of the backgrounds haven't been too interesting but some have been good, overall it's probably fine. plus you can only draw and detail repeating bricks so many times before the viewer gets bored of looking at them anyway, i guess.

the animation is really fun and expressive. it's trigger, so they don't keep scenes stiffly on-model when they want characters moving around. this is good because it helps to sell both action and comedy moments!

the music overall i haven't really cared for? the BGM has not been particularly moving, interesting, or memorable - mostly generic. and i've seen too many fantasy shows for my own good, so i might be harder to impress (but i even remember tenken had a good BGM song or two to make a fight dramatic and that show was barely above average at best)

i'm biased not being particularly into bump, so i would've selected a different artist for the OP (i actually did like the bump OP from SxF though, come to think of it). before anyone makes a wisecrack based on what i've watched lately, no it doesn't have to be yoasobi.

i maybe feel the ED song would've been better for the OP, i don't like the largely peaceful bit of the OP with very still visuals. the OP is where you reel people in! it should be an eye-catching hook, representative of what to expect with some extra sauce on top.

the ED is great, total bop. it's a fine time for slower visuals as an enjoyable wind-down from the episode, so less or no animation is no big deal. plus kui's art is absolutely gorgeous! it all perfectly fits that "end of work" fun and lighthearted mood they were going for.

i largely enjoy the voice acting. i would've personally gone for a less "old man" voice on senshi because he's really not that old for a dwarf, but they obviously wanted to make it clear he was the older, wiser, knowledgeable character.

this might be my own personally most blasphemous opinion, but i would've picked a different VA for falin. i want to make it clear i absolutely adore saori hayami - she's incredible and one of my faves. with that said, her voice fits the character, so maybe it's just because i've heard her too often which is not her fault by any means! i love the voices for laios, marcille, and chil.

it seems netflix's subs go off of the official EN TL of the manga, which makes sense, but i've talked about how i don't like it more than ehscans' TL (which is one of the single best TLs i've read for a series, official or otherwise) and that holds true for the anime ("mad sorcerer" is cooler AND less clunky than "lunatic magician"). i prefer less localisation stuff and/or quirkiness in my subs and more direct translation for both manga and anime.

as for the changes/additions they've made to the show, some of them have been alright and some i didn't care for. they really want to sell marcille as the funny joke character which is why they had her being chased by the basilisk instead of having doni & fionil like it was in the manga which was better for the pacing and had good impact vs a funny clip of marcille running back and forth.

i don't dislike when adaptations add or change stuff, but placing them cleanly is important. dunmeshi is already really funny! i don't think it needs help being funnier by reaching for the cheap laugh. when laios sees two people running for their lives from a basilisk and he just goes "wow that's a bad way to run from that monster", it's already lowkey hilarious - all the more so followed by marcille telling mr. monster-know-it-all to go rescue them if he knows what's up and him rescuing them by making himself big and chicken squawking real loud (which embarrasses marcille and chil, but c'mon guys, at least his idea worked!). i feel like the comedy in laios' funny hero moment is undercut by forcing the marcille butt of the joke moment in the anime.

dunmeshi is already incredibly good at just about everything it does. i feel if an adaptation wants to add or change something, it's often better amplifying a strength or shoring up a weakness in the source material. BTR adds a lot to the source (not hard considering the source is a 4koma) and makes already funny things even funnier. the "we should all get social media" scene is elevated to iconic status with the visual of bocchi glitching out + the VA's inhuman screech. i can't say where i'd really want to change or add stuff to dunmeshi, since it really feels so good and whole, but i'm sure there's room in the process of translating manga panels to animated scenes, and i think the direction overall could've been better (comparing most shows to BTR isn't fair i know because BTR is directed & adapted so well it's hydrogen bomb vs. coughing baby territory)

i've mostly said negative stuff, but i don't want it to sound like i hate or even really dislike the adaptation. i think when it comes to a series you really love, you want to see the best adaptation possible within reason, and the disappointment of stuff not being quite what you were hoping for is amplified by so many other recent adaptations being so good.

dunmeshi does not have a bad anime by any means, but a lot of that is thanks to the source material's quality. if they do another season, i hope they have more time/budget/whatever because i think a lot of the parts it does have are good parts! but in this case, i wasn't hoping for good; i was hoping for great.

trigger makes great shows with wacky storylines (in some ways, the same one wacky storyline, but that's a different discussion) and dunmeshi, being directed by someone who's worked on a bunch of trigger stuff (largely sci-fi leaning), maybe needed some more direction from people who've worked on fantasy stuff? i can't say for sure what would've been enough to take the show over the top, but though i generally don't hope for much from adaptations, i really did have higher hopes for this one than it ended up achieving.

overall it seems i'll end up scoring the show a 7 or 7.5 when i finish the season, though there's certainly still room to wow us all. whatever you feel about the adaptation, whether you liked it or not, whether or not you've read the manga, feel free to comment your thoughts below or in my inbox. let's keep it free of manga spoils for anime-only watchers, though!

[justawrites]

((Warning, long response incoming!! Sorry in advance!))

I totally agree with your vent post! While I really enjoy the fandom's diverse takes on Nari and Lamb's dynamic, motivations, and designs, I find that in AUs where they’re really horrible to each other romantically, they seem to lack any real chemistry. In these AUs, I often wonder what they could possibly even see in each other and wish they’d just move on, find someone else, or leave entirely. Oh well, at least I can enjoy the neat art styles. :/

I’ve also noticed that in AUs where Lamb abuses Nari, his agency is often completely stripped away, including the ability to care for himself, which feels annoyingly infantilizing. He also simply endures the abuse, like a battered spouse, with little to no pushback. It's frustrating, mainly because it feels like punishment for the sake of punishment, with no real motivations behind it. To me, these portrayals of Nari tend to exclude any grey area and lack nuance in terms of character development. They seem to focus on portraying Lamb as "good™" and Nari as "bad™," all while having the first abuse the second, which leaves a bad taste in my mouth, tbh.

((Btw, I feel that if someone tried to trap Nari again, whether through marriage or whatever else, he would try to leave as quickly as possible. He spent a millennium trapped; even if he could get the crown back, why would he risk staying, only to be trapped again?!))

Honestly, your work is one of my favorite depictions of Nari and Lamb because you give them both agency and clear motivations, while highlighting their strengths alongside their flaws. I particularly love how Nari's departure allows him to heal and find himself. You also take into account the complexity of not just their dynamic, but also their interactions with the Bishops and the rest of the flock. It feels like you genuinely care about how these characters will end up. The AUs you create are so fun, I’m always impressed with how developed your worlds and scenarios are. Ultimately, I find your fics really interesting to read. As someone who loves world-building and visual development, your work has inspired me in how to approach my own AU.

((I have a lot of feelings about this and could go on forever, but I won’t—otherwise, I’d have to include a tl;dr! XD))

But anyways, thanks for your time and have a good one!

(No worry I love long asks <3) Long answer so below the cut

You! You get it! Though I won't sit here and say I don't enjoy toxic fictional relationships, but it all depends on the framing for me. In a lot of cases it feels like shipping for the sake of shipping. I mean in Self-Fulfilling Prophecy, Unfulfilled, I definitely went with the toxic Lamb angle, and the more I think about that particular AU the less I want there to be any sort of positive feelings between the two. The more I think about that AU the less appeal romance has in it for me, and that's how I feel about a lot of AUs I see on here.

That being said, freak4freak power couple who are horrible people to everyone but each other is really fun lmao-

That's a big reason why I started God in a Godless Land in the first place if I'm honest. I wanted to explore a Narinder whose healing journey did not revolved around the Lamb or them being his caretaker, where when they meet again they're on as equal footing as a god and a semi-mortal can be. Spoiler alert, but Narinder and Lamb will have a conversation about this later.

And yeah I find it really boring when people throw nuance out the window. I don't like lumping all the blame on one character. I mean, Narinder was bad, yes, but at the end of the day the red crown was his and the Lamb did betray him, but most people shift it all onto Narinder. Also mostly unrelated but I think a lot of people forget/ignore that he did not want to be spared. He protests when the Lamb spares him and laughs when the Lamb kills him, so when I see an AU where they have him cowering in fear and begging for his life it's just like. I'm sorry what. That cat is not afraid to die. If anything he's probably afraid to live. (Side note, I also take issue with Unholy Alliance pushing almost all of the blame onto Shamura)

But yeah, in a lot of AUs I just. I want Narinder to either leave or find someone in the cult, at least, who will help him detangle his identity from the red crown and death itself. I would love to see more people exploring his healing arc separate from the Lamb. Obviously I tend to focus on his relationship with the Bishops, but it's also nice when people let him strike out on his own.

Narinder spent a thousand years trying to get out of chains, there's no doubt in my mind that he wouldn't let the Lamb even metaphorically chain him down. That's another thing about Godless Land that hasn't really been touched on yet; when Narinder chooses to settle down in Riverwood, it's his own choice. No one is making him stay and he's not subservient to anyone. There is no master, no one to be bowed down to and no one bowing, and he chooses to stay. When Wren confesses his feelings, Narinder can say no. There's no power or status difference between them in the godless lands. He can say no. He chooses Wren purely because he wants to; he isn't bound to obedience or subservience. It's his choice, and it is also so so easy to make these things his choice with the Lamb and cult as well, but all too often it's not. And, in that conversation between them I mentioned earlier, Narinder even acknowledges this; had he stayed in the cult and the Lamb shared with him their feelings, he probably would have accepted because that's how cults work. You don't reject the leader and you don't reject the god. He would have felt like he had no choice.

(Also this is just a personal me thing but I am very bored of the "Narinder tries to get the crown back" angle lmao I mean, go off y'all, write what y'all want and have fun with it. I'm more partial to "Narinder either chills out immediately because sunlight and berries and sleep for the first time in a milennia" or "Narinder goes into retirement mode and just shrugs his shoulders any time anything happens- your cult not mine")

hhhhh thank you so muchhh I really do love the stories/worlds I create. And I understand on some level CotL is like... a story about cults and killing and things are inherently unhealthy, all things considered, but I really really wanted to focus on the idea of Lamb (and the Bishops, once they've chilled the fuck out and basically became cleansed lol) wanting to change the world (even if they end up repeating patterns before figuring it out) and Narinder learning to live again without the weight of the life he once lived on his shoulders. But the shift for the gods from being worshiped deities who command and don't give their followers a second glance to worshiped deities who protect and love their followers...... they really do want to change things hhhgjg

I would have more to say myself but I have 5 minutes before class starts so imma leave the response here kjgfjk but thank you so much, I'm glad you're enjoying my stories!! I'm having a blast writing them so I'm happy to hear someone out there is enjoying them <3

[whotfelsewantedtobelynnyx]

Where I’ve been, and my plans moving forward.

Hey Tumblr (and hopefully my AO3 readers)…it’s been a minute. And I’m sorry for that, I really am. I wanted to pop on here and give y’all an explanation as to what’s been going on with me and where I’ve been…but for a writer, I’m surprisingly short on stuff to say. So I’m just going to start.

Where I’ve been

It’s been at least a month since I’ve posted (and over a year since I’ve updated my most popular series, The Raven House). And…yeah, I feel bad about that. The short version is, I completely changed my lifestyle. The long version is that I finished my semester of school at the end of May last year and just…didn’t go back. Initially, I decided to work full time for awhile to give myself some time to recover after a bad mental break. But I realized pretty quickly that I didn’t want it to be temporary. I have severe ADHD and anxiety, as well as some health issues that just overall made school miserable for me. At least right now, I’m much more fulfilled and happy with my work. I’m lucky enough to have gotten a good job (really good for someone my age) in an AMAZING work environment and I’m just much happier there.

So what does this have to do with my fics and my blog?

Well, two things. One- I have less time overall. To be honest, a LOT of my works were written while I was spacing out in class. With my job, I don’t have the time or really any reason to space out at my desk- and that really is a good thing! Because secondly, writing was as much a coping mechanism as it was a hobby. When I was posting and writing regularly, a lot of it was pure avoidance. I could stave off my stress by pretending I was being productive when I wrote a new chapter, and I could avoid paying attention to class by researching for my character’s outfits, you know? It made it easier. It was also (depressingly) one of the few places where I could get real positive feedback and praise, which I DESPERATELY needed, but never got (as I was admittedly a terrible student). So I did as much as possible in order to garner pretty much any positive attention. And I am grateful that in those times, I had writing to cope- but I’m also glad that I don’t have to rely on it as much anymore, because it ultimately wasn’t healthy.

Where does this leave me?

I don’t write all this to announce the closing of my account. I promise, this is not me saying goodbye. However, I’m going to be learning how to truly embrace writing as a hobby and how to fit it into my new lifestyle. With that, I’ll be trying to work on more of my original content, which I post separately. I'll also be adjusting my plans for some of my fics. Here’s the list of what I’m planning on going forward.

The Raven House

The Raven House is my most popular work and absolutely one of my favorites. It also takes AGES to write, especially with me having shifted hyper fixations. I won't be pausing or stopping work on it all, but it will continue to take ages. TL;DR: It's not going away, but it'll continue to take a long time and have a very uneven upload schedule. I hope y'all will understand and keep going.

Multimedia

This piece will be discontinued. Honestly, I just have no idea where to go with it and there's not much point in me keeping it going. I think it's a fun concept, but I don't really want to continue it at this time.

Insomnia

Similar to Multimedia, it's a fun concept, but I don't have any ideas or motivation to push forward with it.

Blank Space

This will stay as a one-shot for now. I originally wrote this with plans to have it as a three chapter story, but I'd rather focus my motivation on The Raven House.

Shades Of Lavender

For lack of a better word, I'm considering this piece to be on hiatus. I don't want to say goodbye to this piece or these characters by any means- however it's another that will continue to take AGES. I'll work on it on the side, but I won't be posting it for the foreseeable future.

Purgatory

I'm wrapping up the last pages of this fic! However I'm still deciding if I can really wrap this up with one more chapter.

That's...pretty much all I had to say. I feel like I'm forgetting something. I'll remember later.

Thank you from the bottom of my heart to my readers who see this. I understand if you left, but I'm doubly grateful for the ones who stuck around <3