#through to the road at this point and no i couldn't keep up with her

[lila-kriegerin]

OMG, OP!

I was just about to suggest "Now & Then "

but I saw it in your tags.

I'm so sorry this may look like an unhinged rant no one asked for, but someone has to tell people younger than me what I know, so I spent 2 hours crafting a reply/follow-up/addendum to you post, OP. Please forgive any formatting errors. I tried to keep things simple and engaging but a few things may look a little bit odd depending on what sort of device you're viewing it on. I couldn't take the risk of making all the text too small

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RQLVzTtt2Ws

The biggest problem trying to find similar films is that they often involve at least two of the girls having some kind of relationship to boys causing drama (I'm looking at you, "Sisterhood Of The Travelling Pants "... and others) whereas a film like "Dead Poets Society " is definitely in that pseudo-homoerotic and explicitly homoerotic range of storytelling.

Why do you think "Little Women" was popular for so long? It was the 1oth century literary equivalent with the requisite brush with death and loss so common to an era before even antibiotics existed... and loss and grief still happen today.

It's true that so few are like "Newsies " and "West Side Story ", but DON'T sleep on hits like "Annie" &

🥁 drumroll, please 🥁

Want to guess what was the first obviously gay song featured in a film from Hollywood (after the Hayes Code)?

The First Gay Anthem: Calamity Jane's 'Secret Love'

It's not "West Side Story " because it's a western frontier musical, and they skirted the lines as hard as they could to have a nice Christian young woman fancying a "tomboy": Calamity Jane (who by historical record seems to have favoured women and men).

Though based on American Western folklore, this premise clearly imitated the successful 1950 film version of Irving Berlin's Broadway musical Annie Get Your Gun, about Wild West sharpshooter Annie Oakley.

But instead of a make-over, Calamity Jane gives its tough-gal heroine a powerfully symbolic pistol; her masculine aggression plays with sexual identity through gestures enlarged to the point of farce. And then it goes deeper--into emotional confusion that grows from Jane taking on supposed male habits. Doris Day brings comic overstatement to Jane's complex repression of her own instincts. Like many a closet case, she exhibits a self-defeating willingness to fit into a male-dominated culture. Her tough mannerisms are also designed to protect her hidden, vulnerable emotions.

You have to dig.

Dig deep, and be willing to watch a film with a different spoken language and culture, but there are some parallels.

Consider the Britney Spears film, which I believe is called "Crossroad(s)" in English. [Sorry, I don't have time to look up the title.]

Now— what if there were a film that's something a bit like a lesbian equivalent?

Touch

A Chinese movie produced/sponsored by the sapphic dating app Rela. It follows three girls on a road trip. Chinese language with English subtitles.

I've never, EVER seen any website draw direct comparisons to other films that way, such as:

If you loved "She's The Man" but want it more sapphic (though ultimately thwarted by the producer), you can't miss "Bend It Like Beckham"!

The photo which was posted by OP DOES contain valid points!! (No one is going to treat you "like a man/boy" unless they truly think that's what you are, and society DOES socialise people differently, so: how would a group of teenage girls or very young adult women ever have experiences identical to those in a film like "Dead Poet's Society"?)

Nevertheless, there are some similar films that are comparable:

"Superbad" — "Booksmart".

I decided to hyperfocus trying to think up some equivalents to "Dead Poet's Society".

Here's a quick comparison I spent far too much time on:

If you’re looking for a Dead Poets Society equivalent with mostly female characters, a few films capture that same blend of deep emotional intimacy, artistic passion, and repressed desire. Here are the best contenders:

1. Mädchen in Uniform (1931 & 1958)

This is the OG queer boarding school drama. Set in a strict Prussian girls' school, it follows a young student, Manuela, who falls in love with her teacher, Fräulein von Bernburg. The film is explicitly homoerotic in a way that Dead Poets Society is only suggestive of—there’s longing glances, whispered affections, and a stifling environment that tries to crush individuality and desire. Like Neil, Manuela faces tragic consequences for daring to express herself.

Cracks (2009) — If Dead Poets Society were darker and more explicitly about queer desire, it would be Cracks. This film follows a group of girls at a remote British boarding school under the spell of their charismatic teacher, Miss G (Eva Green, in all her seductive, unhinged glory). When a new student arrives, power struggles and hidden obsessions unravel. It has all the repression, poetry, and tragic queerness you could want.

Heavenly Creatures (1994) — Peter Jackson (yes, Lord of the Rings Peter Jackson) directed this feverishly intense drama about two schoolgirls in 1950s New Zealand—Pauline and Juliet—whose bond becomes so consuming that it leads to murder. Like Dead Poets Society, it’s about breaking free from repression, but it takes a much darker turn. The homoerotic tension between the girls is undeniable, and the fantasy world they create as an escape mirrors the way the DPS boys use poetry to carve out their own space in a suffocating environment.

Picnic at Hanging Rock (1975) — This one’s all about atmosphere—a haunting, dreamlike film about a group of girls at an Australian boarding school who mysteriously vanish during a picnic. While there’s no overt romance, the film is full of lingering touches, dreamy stares, and a pervading sense of longing and repression. The rigid Victorian setting and the contrast between the natural world and societal constraints make it feel spiritually connected to DPS.

The Falling (2014) — Starring Florence Pugh and Maisie Williams, this film is weird and hypnotic. It’s set in an all-girls school in the 1960s and follows a mysterious fainting epidemic that spreads through the students. It has the same themes of teenage rebellion, deep female friendships that tip into obsession, and an oppressive institution trying to crush individual expression.

Céline and Julie Go Boating (1974) — This is a more whimsical, surreal take on female friendship and creativity. It follows two women who fall into a bizarre, looping story in a haunted house, constantly re-experiencing and altering the narrative. It has a Dead Poets Society vibe in the sense that it’s about escaping rigid reality through art and imagination, but with a queer-coded, magical twist.

If you want the closest equivalent to "Dead Poets Society"...

..."Mädchen in Uniform" or "Cracks" are your best bets, and Cracks more than Mädchen in Uniform

because the latter is so old fashioned that to further scandalise viewers they paired a teacher with a student.

If you want something more poetic and atmospheric, "Picnic at Hanging Rock" or "The Falling" will scratch that itch.

If all of that is too gay for you (gofuckyourself, tee-hee)

You really, REALLY should try

"Mona Lisa Smile".

(...and if it's not too gay for you, then go watch CRACKS right now!)

"Mona Lisa Smile" [hereafter referred to as MLS] is often called the "Dead Poets Society" [hereafter, DPS] for women, and yeah, it certainly hits a lot of the same beats—

an outsider teacher inspiring students to challenge societal norms,

a prestigious school that values obedience over individuality, and

a group of young people grappling with expectations that threaten to suffocate them.

Where DPS is about breaking free through poetry and self-expression, MLS is about that sort of thing tosome degree, but more about feminism, gender roles, and the fight for intellectual freedom in a world that wants women to be just wives and mothers.

Similarities to Dead Poets Society

The Inspirational Teacher as a Catalyst for Change

In DPS, John Keating (Robin Williams) shakes up Welton Academy’s rigid, tradition-obsessed environment with poetry and passion.

In MLS, Katherine Watson (Julia Roberts) does the same at Wellesley College, using art history to challenge her students’ pre-ordained roles as perfect housewives.

Both teachers are NOT merely instructing— they’re awakening their students, making them see the world differently, and often doing so in ways that put them at odds with their school’s administration.

The Oppressive Institution and Its Ideals

Welton Academy is a suffocating prep school that values discipline over creativity, much like Wellesley College in the 1950s. They outwardly promote academic excellence but ultimately groom women to become ideal wives. (T_T)

Both films show how these institutions uphold deeply ingrained traditions that resist change, even when it's clearly needed.

Both films show some of the human cost of trying, and giving up.

A Group of Students at a Crossroads

Just like Todd, Neil, and the rest of the DPS boys who struggle between expectation and their own desires, the young women in MLS— Joan, Betty, Giselle, and Connie—each navigate their own battles between societal pressure and personal ambition.

Joan (Julia Stiles) mirrors Todd.

Betty (Kirsten Dunst) is like a mix of Cameron and Richard from DPS.

Giselle (Maggie Gyllenhaal) is the Charlie of the group.

The Tragedy of Repression

DPS’s tragedy is clear: someone's dreams are crushed & there is a heartbreaking su*c*de [all the trigger warnings apply]. MLS doesn’t have a singular moment that tragic, but its heartbreak is quieter—seeing some brilliant young women choose societal expectations over their own ambitions because it feels like the only option... that is definitely going to haunt some people more than it may haunt white cis-hetero male viewers.

In both films, someone (one you probably like most of all, in both films) will have something horrible happen to them by their own choice, and that is very haunting.

Additionally, I dont think it's too big a spoiler to say oth films end with the teacher leaving— but to say why would spoil the endings of the films.

The last scenes mirror each other emotionally: in DPS & MLS, a quiet, bittersweet goodbye with both endings suggesting that while the teacher is gone, the ideas they planted will live on.

Key Differences

The Central Conflict

DPS is about breaking free from repression through art and poetry. It’s about passion, self-expression, and the fight for creative freedom.

MLS is about that too, though with more of a (*cough*white*cough*cough*) feminist focus on gender roles, feminism, and intellectual independence to have intellectual and self growth as an individual— and it asks whether women can truly be free when they’re still expected to conform to outdated expectations.

Homoerotic "Sub"text

[be honest: if you miss it in either film you're in denial or unobservent and that is your own journey you need to take]

DPS is filled with homoerotic tension, especially between Todd and Neil. The intimacy between the boys—the longing glances, the whispered poetry, the emotional weight of their friendships—feels deeply charged.

If you DEMAND that level of queerness, MLS ain't it.

MLS has some queer subtext, particularly with [one character], who is coded as more fluid in her sexuality, but the film doesn’t lean into that as much as DPS does because it's focused more on the pseudo-historical narrative from the book upon which it was based.

Don't forget that DPS came out to cinemas...

THEN "The Craft" did,

THEN "Cruel Intentions" did,

THEN MLS.

DPS was intentionally pushing boundaries of censors for queer story-telling when the USA was still afraid for gay people to peck each other with a little kiss on the lips on television before 10 PM.

DPS ends in a tragedy that reinforces the cost of defying the system— [spoilers redacted], and the boys are [narratively] left in a state which leaves the viewers feeling a bittersweet limbo.

MLS is perhaps a bit more hopeful; and although the school seemingly remains unchanged, things in that world have definitely shifted for the characters.

Their worlds aren't fully transformed though for MLS, it’s beginning to open up, but MLS leaves viewers with their own bittersweet limbo like DPS[-lite] with a sliver of a dash of hope.

Final Verdict:

"Mona Lisa Smile" is "Dead Poets Society" through a differing feminist lens.

It swaps poetry for art,

an all-boys school for an all-girls college, and

queer-coded male friendships for female students fighting for their intellectual freedom.

It has the same spirit—

a teacher who inspires students to think for themselves, an oppressive institution trying to maintain order, and young people wrestling with societal expectations.

However, where DPS is a tale of tragic repression, MLS leans toward quiet rebellion— not a fiery "O Captain, My Captain" moment, but a slow, steady push toward change.

just saw this on pinterest and it hit me like a truck

[digestionmachine]

snow mesa, colorado trail, july 2022

[eyesxxyou]

sweet revenge

・・・l. howlett x fem!reader

rating. m

word count. 1.3k

synopsis. after catching your boyfriend cheating, you and his father, Logan, go on a road trip to confront him, though, you don't make it far

warnings. p-in-v, tummy bulging, cheating (but as payback), DILF Logan, car sex, van sex, sex with boyfriend's father, cunilingus, kinda rushed :((

If someone told you you’d be trapped in a car with your neglectful boyfriend’s father for an entire weekend as you drive to meet him in Mexico a week ago, you would have stared at them blankly then told them that didn't sound so out of the ordinary for a life like yours.

It wasn't your idea, it was Logan's, your boyfriend's father. He insisted that you two would have to drive across the US together to confront your disgusting, cheating, asshole boyfriend who flew to Mexico to spend time with his mistress. He was almost as disgusted as you were, apologizing to you with explanations of how “he hadn't raised his boy like this”. How funny life is.

Logan, you always thought, was a good man. He had always been kind to you since you’ve known him, sometimes to the point where you thought he was flirting with you. Not that you minded, he was quite handsome, even for being in his 50s. With his salt and pepper beard and slight wrinkles that made him look mature and wise. You never minded his slight touches on your arm or your lower back but you never pursued the idea beyond a lingering thought.

“I’m slightly surprised you’re not crying.” Logan said about an hour into your ride together. You had been entirely silent, letting the radio play while you gazed longingly out of the window, your feet up on the dashboard. You rolled your head to the side to look at him. “I’m more angry than sad.” Or were you? You searched within the cavity of your chest for emotion and found nothing. You were so apathetic to the whole thing. Maybe it simply hasn't hit you yet, that your boyfriend of 3 years has been cheating on you for 2 of them with some girl he decided to vacation with in Mexico.

Logan stroked his fingers through his beard. “He’s a fucking idiot. His mother was a cheater too, I say he got it from her.” Your boyfriend was raised primarily by his mother after they had gotten divorced he had told you. He wasn't actually all that close with Logan. You had sussed out that it was because he didn't give special treatment between him and his sister, Laura. They were treated the same in every way by Logan while his mother always seemed to favor him.

“Thank you, Mr. Howlett for offering to bring me down here…really. It’s too kind of you.” You couldn't have possibly scrounge up enough money to haphazardly buy a plane ticket down to Cancun last minute. You would have had to wait for him to come back from his “business trip” to confront him. Logan thought it a better idea to do it as soon as possible.

He shrugged, a single hand on the wheel as his eyes flicked lightly from the road to you. “It’s nothing. He doesn't deserve a pretty girl like you.” Logan shook his head lightly. “Back in my day, I would have been all over a girl like you. Hell, I’d be all over you now if I’d met you at the right time.”

There's something deadly serious in his voice that suggests he was far from joking. All your delusional thoughts that maybe, just maybe, he was flirting with you turned out to not be delusions at all. He’s been dropping hints and you’d been turning a blind eye to them so willingly.

You’ve never been with a man his age. Something about it seemed so taboo. He was old enough to be your father. Yet the distinct feel of forbiddenness, both because of his age and because he was your boyfriend's father, excited you.

“Who says you can't be all over me now?” You’re being more bold than you’d have liked. You crossed your ankles on the dash. It would be the perfect revenge. When he goes low, you go lower—you go to Hell.

You let your hand wander to his thigh, your eyes lingering on him as he keeps glancing between you and the road. Logan chuckled lowly at you, your forward attempts at coming onto him were rather cute. “Oh baby, you don't know what you’re tryna get yourself into.” He’s trying to warn you but you like the edge to his tone.

You unbuckle your seatbelt and sit up in your seat to lean over and whisper into his ear. “Let me find out.” Maybe older men do it better, maybe they value things a little more. You were in the mood to find out.

You could see his jaw tighten as he slowed the car off the side of the road, gravel crunching under the tires. His fingers curled around the wheel, taut, knuckles white. “Why don't you get in the back?”

If someone told you you’d be in the back of a van, on you way to confront your cheating, sleazebag boyfriend, fucking his dad. That…that you’d bat an eye at.

It was a fast-paced endeavor. Logan had you in a mating press, pushed up against the back seats. Your pants and underwear at your knees, his pants just below his ass. He’s pounding you out in the back of a van, with thrust so hard and deep that it makes your eyes go cross. You beg, “please, please, puh-please!” like that will save you from the brutalization of your poor cunt.

Logan grunts above you, his hands gripping your thighs hard enough to leave bruises as he spreads them wide and keeps you still. “You wanted this, princess. Don’t back out now.” His strokes leave you winded, clawing at the cracked leather seat of his van, squealing like you have no damn sense in the world. “I can’t,” you gasp.

“Yes you can, doll. You can take it.” Fuck– he was using his father voice. Stern, authoritative, the kind of voice you can’t say no to. You could have come right then and there from his voice alone, cooing at your pretty pussy like a cat. He pressed his hips sharply into yours and watched your back arch away from the seats and your eyes prick with tears. “Logan!”

“You act like you’ve never been fucked before. Does my son not do a good job?”

You shook your head feverishly. “Never– ” you swallowed, “–like this.” Never made you cum for that matter. If you knew fucking your boyfriend's father would have been like this, you would have done this a whole lot sooner.

You could feel him in your stomach. You pressed your hand to your belly and felt the bulge of his cock under your skin. You whimpered at the feeling, tracing where his cock head poked through. You could feel him pressing against your tender womb.

You let Logan cum in you. It was easy to with a face like his. You let him sink himself deep inside, a guttural groan rattling out from his throat, satisfied as he emptied his balls inside you. You could help but giggle as he came in you. The thought of possibly having his baby didn't bother you as much as you thought it would. Logan was a good man, well, as good as one can be while fucking his son’s girlfriend.

Logan didn't want to leave you unsatisfied though you were more than used to it. He grabbed your hips and pulled you up, back arching as he dipped down and kissed your cum-soaked pussy. His tongue found your clit with ease, licking tenderly at the bud between your legs, eyes peering over your pelvis, looking down at you.

Your legs trembled over his shoulder, toes pointing with each rough lick against your puffy pussy. “‘s too much, too much.” His lips were latched to your lips, suckling.

Cumming on his tongue was an easy job. He made it so simple yet so powerful. You quivered under every lick, your body rolling with the waves of your orgasm. It was sweet, savory, like tender peaches on a warm, summer evening.

Who knew revenge could taste so sweet?

[ceesimz]

Highs and Lows

Your past is your past, but your future is hers. (angst -> fluff)

After everything you’d been through in the past, you always thought you would end up alone. Every failed relationship was another sucker punch to your heart, causing cracks that allowed doubts and insecurities to leak through into your mind, forming iced walls to your soul no one could melt to get to you.

“Perdoni? Vinc a buscar el meu vestit.”

Her voice was so warm, so polite, when she first spoke. How her accent wrapped around her mother tongue was smooth and welcoming, like it didn’t matter that you were about to disappoint her upon first greeting. 

“I’m sorry, I don’t speak Catalan.” 

She met you with a forgiving smile, shaking her head and waving her hand to brush off your apology. 

“Está bien. Uh, my… my suit? I pick it up?” 

The suit wasn't ready for pickup at that time, a mixup between you and the owner of the small tailor shop you worked at who had seemingly gotten a bit too festive the night before and forgotten to do the schedule for the day. So she stayed and chatted with you as you did it, which was actually very helpful since she could try on her blazer that needed the most work doing, though it was more her asking you questions and you giving her curt responses than an actual, normal conversation. You couldn't help it, it had become second nature to you at this point. People had betrayed your trust in all kinds of ways before, and it was sure to happen again.

It was Christmas Eve when you met her, but it took some time before you really let her in.

“So, I ask you, will you be my Valentine?” 

That day, the thirteenth of February, when she'd come in with a dress that needed adjusting slightly for her sister, she was a woman on a mission. Alexia wasn't used to people shutting her down when she had her mind set on something, and since you were the first to tell her otherwise, she knew you were the one.

“How many times do I have to tell you I won't go on a date with you? I'm not looking for relationships or even friendships right now.” 

She was kind. Compassionate. Every time she spoke, you couldn’t help but hang on to every word she said. That didn’t mean you were falling for her tricks though. Your walls were up, and they were high. You didn’t know a thing about her, and her you, but she was like a dog with a bone. Sometimes, you feared she had bad intentions with it. That’s the kind of roads your mind took you on.

“Okay, no Valentine. But, coffee? Conmigo?”

Why was she so adamant to get to know you? Just some nobody that worked at a tailor shop, spending hours on the nights you couldn’t sleep drawing and designing all kinds of clothes that’d never see the light of day outside your notebook. Judging by how she dressed, she was definitely comfortable financially, at least. She had good taste, and dressed in a way that exemplified her mindset and who she wanted to be. With every smart coat and fresh out-of-the-box pair of trainers she wore, you felt like you got a peek inside her mind each time you saw her. Then there was you, dressed down and comfortable for a day sat in front of a sewing machine and a desk.

“I told you, I don’t want to.”

Alexia remembered vividly the day she first heard you laugh. The sound of it made her laugh too, not because she found it funny, but because she got such a burst of euphoria out of it that it was her body’s natural instinct to react like that. All day and every night, you were on her mind. And, something that was completely out of character for her, she found herself looking for excuses to come to the tailor shop just to see you.

“Hm. People do not say no to me. I will keep trying, lo prometo.” 

A tap on the counter, and she left after that. 

As you expected, she kept to her word; the next day, she brought the coffee to you. Four coffees, actually. One without milk, one with normal milk, one with almond milk, and one with oat milk, just so she could find out what was your favourite.

“I don’t drink coffee. Of any kind, with any milk.”

That was the day you laughed for the first time, you couldn’t help it, the way her face fell after you revealed your secret was way too funny to not laugh. She feigned disapproval when you went into the backroom, grabbed a sharpie and a square of cardboard, and wrote ‘free coffee with every pickup!’ on it to put on the counter.

Though, you came to a realisation that day, one that kept you up through the night. She was the first person in years that actually stayed true to their promise. So maybe you did crack a little then, and when she walked in the next day to collect what she’d left the previous morning, you handed her the cardboard with your number on the back. Hardly two minutes passed after she left before your phone pinged. 

For a few days, instead of her coming to you as you learned she was travelling for work, the pair of you exchanged texts. All day long. Sometimes, all night long too. There was just… something about her that pulled you in. You were tired of resisting that. 

“So I see you tomorrow? I will pick you up. With, with flowers! Hasta mañana, cariño!” 

The excitement that radiated off of her as she scurried out of the shop, late for work, after you caved and took her up on her offer for dinner together was addictive. Her smile was a beautiful one, you’d come to realise, and you wanted to see it everyday whenever you could. Someone hadn’t shown this amount of interest you in… ever. You had hoped it’d be different this time around- surely she wouldn’t disappoint you like everyone else, you’d think. 

There was a brightly coloured bouquet in her arms when she met out outside the shop when your shift had finished. By that point, you’d known her for a number of months now, and as you ate dinner and talked, laughed, smiled, with her that evening over some of the best tapas you’d ever had, you felt bad that she had to wait so long.

You decided, there and then, you were going to be more proactive about your feelings which had been there since the first day she walked in. Repressing them was only preventing you from exploring something that could be your whole future. 

“I… I really want to kiss you goodnight. Can I kiss you?”

Never did you think that the beautiful blonde woman who showed up on a cloudy Sunday morning would be the one to make you break all the rules you’d made for yourself. They weren’t rules, really. They were insecurities you told yourself were rules, because you believed them so wholeheartedly that you never thought they’d be snapped in half by someone like her. Someone that started buying oversized clothes, trousers that were too long or suits with sleeves too loose for her liking, just so she could see you.

“You can kiss me goodnight, Ale.”

Takes one small mistake for a good thing to be ruined. 

You didn’t know exactly what she did for work. You knew she worked in the sports industry, but that was it. You never really asked in detail what she did, you didn’t want to talk about your job so when she said the same thing, who were you to deny her of that?

So, imagine your surprise, when you’re at your friend’s house, only to see Alexia on the TV, bowing in a stadium of almost one hundred thousand spectators that chanted her name. Alexia, the slightly shy and quietly confident woman that took any excuse to meet up with you, was someone else entirely.

“My job… it’s not that important. There are more, ah, interesting topics to talk about.”

That wasn’t the truth. She had lied to you, about her job, about who she really was. 

Even in the four walls of your friend’s home, the sheer amount of people began to make you feel overwhelmed. You’d never seen that many people in your life, nevermind in one place. But Alexia? It was just any other day at work, obviously. For you, it was just another day where someone you trusted turned around and betrayed you.

The night before, she kissed you for the first time. It was something you couldn’t ever forget, and the resentment towards yourself began to set in as you sat there on the sofa, watching this stranger run up and down the grass pitch, you far from her mind. From the colours she wore that matched the ones by the winning team by the scoreline in the top corner, she was doing well. And you were happy for her. 

You didn’t know a thing about football, and that was yet another thing to add to the list of differences between you both. Alexia, confident, controlled in everything she does, determined. You, lost in your life, lost in yourself, and unmotivated. 

“Can’t be worse than mine, right?”

That night, after you went home, hands shaking and chest heaving with short, panicked breaths as you walked, you turned your phone off. You didn’t want to hear from her, and you knew she would text you before she went to sleep. 

When you got into bed, you didn’t feel a thing. You lay on your back, eyes unmoving from the ceiling above, and simply sighed. All those months ago, you knew you should have stuck to your rules. Getting close to her and letting her in was the reason why you were hurting now, it was all your fault that you were left like this.

Yet, you didn’t feel a thing, in the end, you were just… numb. 

“Why did it take you so long to go on a date with me?”

This was something you were used to now, a dance you knew every step to. The end result was different, however, because it had happened so often that it never surprised you anymore. It had just been a matter of time. 

No tears were shed, no anger was held, there was nothing but emptiness. Every second since that first meeting on Christmas Eve had been taken up by Alexia, whether that was her physical presence in front of you or the daydreams in your mind. Now, there was only regret, as you thought over every moment with her. The feel of how her hand felt in yours was substituted with coldness, the same chill that encased your heart again. The taste of her lips, how soft they felt against yours, was something you got to experience once. This aftermath was worth that. Nothing could ever compare to it.

“I… I have a past. I don’t want history to repeat itself. I guess I was just… scared.” 

It was foolish to have admitted that to her. You didn’t intend to, it was more a moment of weakness. Her arms were around you, your back to her chest as you lay together on her couch in the comfortable darkness of her living room only a few nights before she kissed you. The admission was out in the open before you could stop it, and you hated the fact she had heard you say that and still continued to lie to you. You had no idea how the woman you thought she was could whisper her next words whilst keeping her own secret locked away.

“You don’t have to be scared with me. I would never hurt you. Lo prometo.”

After a sleepless night that was entertained by memories of you and the stranger you were in love with passing through your mind like a slideshow, you returned to work like nothing happened. You showed up even earlier than normal, a whole hour earlier, the sun only just beginning to peek over the horizon. The bell rang as you opened the door to the little hole-in-the-wall shop, the same one that became the anthem to Alexia’s arrival and departure whenever she paid you a visit. 

There were countless visits, each one a memory you could describe in detail, though there wasn’t any point in doing that, seeing as they’d just led to another broken promise.

You were knee-deep in repairing a zipper on some old lady’s favourite jacket when the bell rang again. Of course, your mind immediately jumped to her, but in reality it was probably just the owner. It was still another half hour before the shop opened.

“Perdoni? Estic buscant la…” You knew that voice anywhere.

She trailed off when you rounded the corner, and you gave no reaction whereas her eyebrows shot up, before falling straight back down as she sighed in relief. 

“Gràcies a déu. You are here.” Just like the first time, the way she spoke was ineffably soft. Though, there was an allure to it, like she knew something was wrong and she desperately wanted to fix it. 

“What are you doing here?” You asked in what could only be described as an insecure whisper. 

She took two steps towards the counter, the only physical object that separated you both, nevermind the recent events. 

“You did not text or call last night. And you look…” She shook her head and frowned, taking another step. “You look tired. And upset.”

That was one thing that had transpired in the time you spent with her, she came to read you surprisingly well. 

“You wear your heart on your sleeve. I'm not sure if you know that.”

Nobody ever truly knew you well enough to identify that. But to her, it was obvious.

“I am tired. I'm okay though.” You nodded. Alexia saw right through you.

“No, you're not. Something is wrong. Please, tell me. I want to know and I want you to feel better. If… if I have done something, I want to fix it.” The blonde said definitively.

What else did you have to lose? You'd already made peace with her being your past, it wasn’t like she could make your future any worse.

“You… lied to me, Alexia.” You stated quietly, averting your gaze to the scratched wood of the counter in front of you. The shop was silent for a few moments, and you knew all was said and done in terms of this… whatever it was between you both.

“I did? A-about what?” She asked, a tremor in her voice that did little to calm your racing heartbeat.

“Your job. I saw you on TV last night. You were on TV.” 

All the anxiety you felt at the idea of confrontation tripled when you saw the corner of her mouth twitch the tiniest bit. She found this whole thing funny. 

“I don't want to do thi-”

“I never lied. I really didn't lie.” Another step closer, her waist an inch from the counter. Her hand reached for yours that rested on it, but you pulled it away and moved back a bit. 

It was then that she realised how serious this was for you. 

“I just don't want you to lie to me, ever. About anything. And we'll be fine.”

Refraining from talking about her job, the thing that everyone overlooks her for as a human who wanted normal things, instead of the player that got harassed for signatures that'd be on the market minutes after she put the lid on her pen or the player that was expected to be perfect all the time, had caused all this. In her eyes, it wasn't a lie, but the minute you voiced your hurt, she recognised how it would have come across for you. 

“You did! You can't keep something like that a secret and expect me to be okay with it. How could you do this?” You could never get angry like everyone else could, never feel it normally. You had to let it consume you, to the point of tears. The first of this whole ordeal.

“I said it wasn't important, I never lied to you. I see now it is important, but you never asked me about it and I was relieved about that because everybody sees me as my job and you are the first person outside my family to see me as something more.” She rushed out, taking a deep breath afterwards to try and gain her composure back. It cracked once more when she saw how you tried to hide the fact you had to wipe some tears away, but she remained strong. “Last night, the partit, I know it seemed like a lot. But that is all it is. Just football. And as much as I love it, it was nice to not have to talk about it all day every day with you. You are a normal person, a beautiful and unique person, but… ugh, I do not know how to word it. I do not want to hurt you with what I say because I can't find the right words.”

Despite her frustrations, you sort of knew what she was saying. Judging by the importance of the game you saw yesterday, you could imagine that she never really got to leave the intensity of that with the people she was surrounded by and the fans that followed. 

You had a normal job, a normal daily routine. From the sounds of it, her life was far from normal. So, despite the current distance between you both, you sort of understood where she was coming from. You just didn't know what to say.

“I can see now that it was wrong to not tell you about something so big in my life. I will tell you everything you want to know. Everything. You can ask so many questions, I will not hide a thing from you.” She looked and sounded desperate for you to forgive her. 

If anyone held a gun to your head in that moment, you couldn't tell them how you felt. As a result of your uncertainty, the silence stretched on and on, only causing more of a gap. With every passing second, Alexia was consumed by dread. 

She should have been more considerate, more aware of how you felt and what you needed from her. Instead, she'd gotten tunnel vision on who she could be around you, rather than who you wanted her to be. That revelation made her sick, because there was no one to blame but her if this was something that couldn't be repaired.

“Do you… do you want me to go?” The Catalan questioned. 

There was nothing else you thought to do, other than nod.

“Okay.” Alexia said, frowning as she actually processed what she had just said. You saw the gloss in her eyes shine when she turned towards the door, and it tore your heart in two to see her leave.

When the bell rang as the door closed behind her, you knew instantly that you had made a mistake. You were stuck to your spot for a couple seconds, frozen at the decision you decided you loathed. 

Seeing her walk out wasn't right. Asking her to go wasn't right. She belonged in your future, and though the thought terrified you, you had no choice but to push out your comfort zone and do something for yourself for once.

With the force you opened the door with, you wouldn't be surprised if the poor bell above it broke. But she was there, just about to round the corner, her head bowed as she tried to leave as quickly as possible. Until you called her name. She turned on the spot, her face pinched in confusion as tears raced down her cheeks. There were matching ones on your own, though you let them fall freely, considering there were more important things on your mind.

Cautiously, Alexia began heading back towards you, unsure if that's what you wanted her to do. Then she saw the way your hands fidgeted and how nervous you seemed, and she sped up a little. 

She stood before you, her eyes already red, and you floundered for a moment, wondering how on earth you could come back from telling her to go. Instead, you took one of her hands, waiting for her to nod her permission for you to do so, and led her back inside the shop. The bell rang, again, and it echoed off of the walls until the pair of you were left in silence once more.

Your anxiety mirrored hers, both your futures riding on this moment. It was in your hands to decide what happened next.

“I… panicked.” You started, exhaling sharply afterwards, the truthful words a weight off your chest and making it easier for you to continue. “I got scared, and told myself you betrayed me, as a habit. Which I know you don't want to hear, that's not what anyone wants to hear from someone they're seeing, but it's something I do. Because people do it to me all the time and I'm tired of it. I feel like I was maybe waiting for you to do it, I expected it to happen at some point. Not because of who you are but who I am and what I've been through. So at the first sign of… whatever, I blew it up and turned it into something that it wasn't. I'm sorry.”

“You have nothing to be sorry for.” Alexia told you when you finished, her free hand taking yours and squeezing them both. “You cannot help being scared of something. And especially if it is something that has happened before. You panicked. You let your mind take you somewhere and got stuck in it, that is normal. It has happened to me before, it happens to everybody. But, look, we are talking about it and we are fixing it. Together. Because I want to be with you, it does not matter to me what habits you have, I want to be here to remind you I still want to be with you. I do want to be with you. Really do.” 

Everything she said then was exactly why you knew it was right to go after her. Why you should have let her in after months of her trying. You wished you trusted her earlier and accepted her advances the first time she asked, but if you did that, you wouldn’t have this moment here, where she was showing exactly who she was.

This woman in front of you, she was more than the footballer you saw on TV, and she was so much more than you first gave her credit for. Getting hurt by her not telling you about that portion of her life was unnecessary, because the person on the screen was endlessly talented and extraordinary, sure, but the person in front of you was who she really was. She had many sides and personas, but none of them were on show around you. No, she was Alexia. She was the woman you loved, the gentle and caring soul you had the privilege of knowing for the past months. She was your future.

“I want to be with you too. I’m scared by that, I think it might take a while for my anxiety to go, if you… if you’re fine with that.” At that, she smiled. Her soft, forgiving, welcoming smile that drew you in in the first place.

“I am fine with that. I will do anything, tell you anything, to remind you that I will be here and to make those anxieties go quiet. We will go at your speed from here, whatever you want and need. I just want you. Just want to be yours.” For some reason, you found yourself giggling quietly when she finished speaking. And like the first time she heard you laugh, she joined in with you. “What? I mean it.”

“I know. I know you do. I can’t really believe I found someone like you. Everything in the past seems worth it now that… now that you’re here. And you’re mine.” She frowned, unhappy at one of the things you said.

“It might seem worth it now, but that doesn’t mean you deserved it, cariño.” Her arms wrapped around you, bringing you in gently for a much needed embrace that quelled your worries indefinitely.

“I know. But we don’t need to think about that. I don’t… want to think about any of that anymore.” You admitted, to which Alexia instantly agreed with.

“We can swap those memories with better ones. Of us.” She chose to say, not wanting to dwell on the past that she didn’t know much about, and honestly thought it was better that she didn’t. To know what you’d been through before her would surely break her heart.

“I can’t wait to make memories with you.” You whispered quietly. She hummed in acknowledgement.

A smile grew on your face, and one grew on hers. Both relieved this miscommunication over, happy to be with each other (finally), and excited for the future together.

—

other fic is still in progress, this is something quick fun and short i had the inspo to write before a very long story comes your way soon!! thanks for reading :)🧡

[mapis-putellas]

𝑫𝒓𝒖𝒏𝒌𝒆𝒏 𝒍𝒐𝒗𝒆

Pairing: Alexia Putellas x reader

Words: 1568

Warnings: absolutely none

Summary: Alexia loves you, and when she’s intoxicated, she can’t help but tell you every opportunity she gets.

It was close to one in the morning when your phone buzzed on the coffee table, the sound pulling you out of a light sleep on the couch. You squinted at the screen, surprised to see Aitana's name lighting up. You sat up, concern prickling at the edge of your sleepiness as you answered.

"Hey, Aitana, what's up?"

Aitana's voice, tinged with amusement, came through, accompanied by the muffled sounds of a busy night out. "Hey, Y/N, sorry for calling so late, but... you might want to come pick up your girl."

You couldn't help but laugh a little, picturing Alexia out on the town. Going out wasn't really her thing—she usually preferred a quiet night at home with you or just relaxing on her own. But tonight had been different. After a big win, Mapi had convinced her to celebrate, and you'd encouraged her too, thinking she deserved to unwind with her friends.

"Is she okay?" you asked, standing up and grabbing your keys as you spoke.

"Oh, she is fine," Aitana replied, chuckling. "But she refuse to leave with anyone but you. Keeps saying, 'No, Y/N only,' over and over again."

You grinned, warmth filling your chest. "Alright, I'm on my way. Thanks for keeping an eye on her."

"No problem," Aitana said with a laugh. "She is adorable right now, by the way. Just... very clingy."

You ended the call and headed out, smiling to yourself as you drove to the bar. You could picture Alexia, slightly tipsy, clutching her phone and refusing to go with anyone but you. Even tipsy, her loyalty was unwavering.

When you pulled up outside the bar, you spotted Aitana and Mapi by the entrance, standing with Alexia. She was leaning heavily on Mapi's shoulder, eyes slightly glazed but lighting up the second she saw you. Her whole face brightened, and she stumbled forward, hands reaching out for you with an excited grin.

"Y/N!" she slurred, her accent even thicker in her drunken state. She immediately threw her arms around you, clinging tightly and nuzzling her face into your shoulder. "I missed you."

You wrapped your arms around her, chuckling as you steadied her. "I missed you too, Ale. Sounds like you had a fun night?"

She nodded, still holding you close as if she hadn't seen you in months. "Sí, but... not as good as... being with you," she mumbled, her voice muffled against your shoulder.

Mapi and Aitana exchanged amused glances, both of them grinning. "Good luck getting her home," Mapi teased, crossing her arms with a knowing smirk.

You laughed, gently guiding Alexia toward the car. "Thanks for calling me," you said to Aitana as Alexia stumbled along beside you, her arm tightly wrapped around you.

"Anytime," Aitana replied with a wink. "Take care of her. She's all yours."

With Alexia still clinging to you, you helped her into the passenger seat, buckling her in as she watched you with a goofy, love-struck smile.

"You're so... so pretty," she said, reaching up to touch your cheek, her fingers soft and slightly clumsy.

You grinned, warmth blooming in your chest. "Thanks, babe. You're not so bad yourself."

As you started the car, Alexia's attention shifted to the road, her eyes lighting up as you passed by a familiar fast-food place. She perked up, practically bouncing in her seat as she pointed out the window.

"Chicken nuggets!" she exclaimed, her tone full of excitement. "Please, can we get some? Just... just a few?"

You laughed, unable to resist her plea. Normally, Alexia was meticulous about her diet, rarely indulging in things like fast food. But the pleading look on her face, combined with her slightly slurred words, made it impossible to say no

"Alright, let's get you some nuggets," you agreed, pulling into the drive-thru.

Alexia's face lit up, and she practically squealed with delight. When the food arrived, she wasted no time, diving into the nuggets with a look of pure joy on her face. She took bites that were far too big, stuffing her mouth and somehow managing to get sauce on her chin. It was so unlike her usual composed self that you couldn't help but stare, utterly endeared by her messy enthusiasm.

"These are... so good," she mumbled through a mouthful of food, holding out a nugget to you with an earnest expression. "You... you want one?"

You chuckled, shaking your head. "No, babe, those are all for you.

She beamed, continuing to munch on the nuggets as you drove, every so often glancing at you with a happy, slightly dazed expression that made your heart swell.

Once she finished her food, she settled back in her seat, her head leaning against the window as she watched the streetlights pass by. A comfortable silence filled the car, but then Alexia turned to you, her eyes soft and curious.

"Y/N..." she started, her voice quiet, almost vulnerable. "Do you... love me?"

You glanced at her, surprised by the question, though the earnest look on her face melted your heart. "Of course I do, Ale. You know that."

She nodded, seeming satisfied with your answer, but she wasn't done yet. "And... do you think... I am pretty?"

You smiled, reaching over to squeeze her hand. "You're more than pretty, Alexia. You're beautiful."

She blushed, a shy smile tugging at her lips as she looked out the window. But a few seconds later, she turned back to you, her expression serious.

"And... am I good at football?" she asked, her voice barely above a whisper, as if the question held a deep significance.

You gave her hand another squeeze, your voice gentle. "Ale, you're amazing at football. You're one of the best players out there, and you're an incredible captain. Your team is lucky to have you, and I'm lucky to have you too."

Her face softened, her eyes shining with emotion as she gazed at you, clearly touched by your words. "Gracias, mi amor," she whispered, leaning over to rest her head on your shoulder as you continued driving, her breathing slowing as she relaxed.

When you finally pulled up to your place, you parked the car and gently nudged her awake. She blinked, looking slightly disoriented before grinning sleepily at you, reaching out for your hand.

"Home?" she murmured, leaning heavily against you as you helped her out of the car.

"Yeah, let's get you inside," you replied, guiding her toward the front door as she stumbled along beside you, her arm draped over your shoulders.

Once inside, you led her to the bedroom, easing her down onto the edge of the bed. She let out a contented sigh, her eyes half-closed as she watched you with a soft smile.

"Wait," she mumbled, reaching out to grab your hand as you moved to get her some pajamas. "Stay... don't leave."

You chuckled, squeezing her hand reassuringly. "I'm just grabbing you some pajamas, Ale. I'm not going anywhere."

She nodded, her hand slipping away as she leaned back, looking up at you with a sleepy but adoring gaze. You quickly grabbed a t-shirt and some soft shorts, helping her change as she clumsily lifted her arms, barely able to keep her balance. Once she was finally in her pajamas, you pulled back the covers, helping her slide into bed.

You climbed in beside her, expecting her to drift off quickly, but to your surprise, she scooted closer, resting her head on your shoulder as she looked up at you with a sleepy smile.

"Y/N?" she whispered, her voice barely audible. "Will you stay... here?"

You smiled, wrapping an arm around her and pulling her close. "Of course, Ale. I'm not going anywhere."

She snuggled against you, her head resting on your chest as she sighed happily. But even though she was lying down, sleep didn't seem to come easily. Instead, she kept fidgeting, her fingers tracing small patterns on your arm as she looked up at you, her eyes filled with questions.

"Y/N, do you think... we can get nuggets again tomorrow?"

You chuckled softly, nodding as you brushed a strand of hair from her face. "Sure, Ale. We can get nuggets whenever you want."

She smiled, her eyes beginning to close as she relaxed. But just when you thought she was finally drifting off, she stirred again, looking up at you with a sleepy but earnest expression.

"Y/N... you really... really love me, right?"

You wrapped your arms around her, holding her close as you pressed a gentle kiss to her forehead. "Yes, Ale. I really, really love you. Now get some rest, okay?"

She nodded, finally settling down as she snuggled closer, her breathing gradually evening out as she drifted off to sleep, secure in your arms.

And as you held her close, a smile tugging at your lips, you knew that no matter how many times she asked, you'd be there to remind her just how much you loved her, tonight and every night.

**

Tags:

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[juletheghoul]

JULES! It's currently 12:30am and I can't stop thinking about your Marcus gladiator fic. I need to scream this at you.

Picture this:

They are back in Rome. They are in the baths, public or private. I personally picture public ignoring the fact he would definitely get his own bathing area being a successful General but I digress. Someone has had a bit too much wine and gets a little too handsy and rough with his girl. That pisses him off so now he has to take a statement right? You can't touch what's his!

So he calls her into the water with him and has her continue the bathing while sitting on his cock before just eventually destroying her. Bonus points if he makes stoic eye contact with the offending party that started it all.

I cannot get this idea out of my head and I just had to share this with you.

Take care~! ❤️

Nonny - you really came for my fucking throat with this one... 😍😍😍 like... I stared at this with my jaw on the floor - what a mind you have... okay lets get into it

smut under the cut - 18+ and don't read more if you aren't into exhibitionism (not beta'ed and barely proofread lmao)

Series masterlist

---

The campaign was finally over, for now.

He'd marched into the city with his legions behind him, and the streets of Rome roared to herald their victor, the famous, brutal, but efficient, General Marcus Acacius.

He waved, and made the appropriate salutes to the city, but he was sparing with his smiles, his eyes scanning even here in the safety of Rome's breast, for anything that might threaten his safety. You watched him from your place behind him, along with the other slaves that had followed him and his soldiers off to war, invisible in his shadow to anyone but him, and a few brazen few who had decided to test his boundaries. They had been forgotten however, the only thing that occupied your mind, was him.

His first stop had been his villa, to settle his household. It was all very cut and dry, his staff knew to keep his house in order in his absence and they did so, enough that he hadn't even spoken more than a few words while he made his way through. While he set about getting settled in, you did the same, moving silently through his halls towards your modest quarters. The road had been long, and you thought that you could probably get away with bathing, and taking a few moments to yourself, trusting that now he would be well attended to.

You barely got your bearings when he cleared his throat at your door.

"Apologies Dominus, did you want for something?"

"Gather your things, we go to the baths."

-

The baths, strictly speaking, were for everyone. There were certain ones however, like the one you were in now, that were privately owned. This one, was owned by a member of the Senate and friend to the Roman army, and as such, was populated by a few other soldiers, and their attendants.

Marcus spoke very little by nature, he was a man who kept his words as close as he did his coin. He said even less when confronted with raucous laughter, and men who couldn't seem to keep their dignity when taking a cup of wine.

His jaw clenched as you both settled into the warm waters of the baths and you set about washing the march and the war and the violence off of his skin, sitting behind him to rub the knots from his shoulders while ignoring the ever increasingly loud soldiers around you. One of them, was the same that had tested his patience in his tent, and by the way he kept eyeing Marcus in front of you, had forgotten the lesson.

"The oil, girl." He spoke low over his shoulder, and you belatedly realized you'd left the oil he liked with the robes when you'd undressed.

"Yes Dominus." WIth haste, and not an ounce of shame, you rose up out of the water and went to grab the vial, finding it quickly, but before you could make it back to him you were cut off.

"I can see why you like this one General, I can see why you're so greedy with her." The same soldier stands in your way, his hands grabbing at your waist. The wine in his cup spills onto your naked skin and for a moment you're afraid he'll paw at you further but within a moment he's as still as a statue. That's when you notice, the deathly hush that falls over the whole place.

You look up into the soldiers face and his eyes are as big as plates, a small dagger pressed to the apple of his throat, the point just deep enough to draw blood. You hadn't heard him come out of the water.

"This is the last warning I give you, the next time you put your hands on what's mine, you will die." His voice was a whisper, but it echoed through the room. "Have I made myself perfectly clear?"

"Ye-yes, Yes General." all humor had gone from the man, and when Marcus had pulled away, all taste for wine had as well.

Wordlessly you followed Marcus back into the water, but instead of sitting in front of you, he pulled you to sit in his lap, keeping his eyes on the spurned soldier.

"I want you sitting like this." His hands settled on your hips and you felt the way he hardened beneath you, "Continue." He spoke low, but clear and kept his eyes focused, daring anyone to question him.

You did your best to focus on washing his hair, on rubbing the oil into the skin of his shoulders and his chest, but his hands wandered, grabbing at your ass and fitting his cock between the lips of your sex, drawing out your arousal and making your pulse quicken. His lips descended next, pressing softly to your shoulder while his eyes remained fixed. WIth a move, he slid his cock inside, pulling a moan from your lips, it only served to bolster him, making no move to conceal what he was doing and you knew it was part frustration from being at war, and driving home his point.

He said nothing, but he didn't need to.

People watched him take you there, in the water, and they said nothing. Any modesty you had, and shame had been worked out of you long ago and now, all you felt was pleasure. Both at him bouncing you on his cock, and at him having taught the soldier a lesson on your behalf. You ignored the part that sang the sweet song of ownership. You were his, and he relished the fact.

"Dominus-" You all but moaned into his ear, "May I have your gift?" You bounced on your own now, holding onto his neck, pressing yourself tightly to him.

"Yes Girl, it's yours, take it." He grit out the words, his eyes finally finding yours. You sped up, using your buoyancy to your advantage, clenching around him on the downstroke and when you felt his hands tighten around your hips you knew you had him.

"May I have your mouth, Dominus?" You watched his lips as you bounced, and he smiled a tiny smile before claiming your kiss with the same ardor that burned in your veins.

His tongue licked into your mouth and within a moment you felt the first spurt of him, deep inside where he liked it to be.

After a few minutes you made to move but his hands held you tightly. You took a look around, but unbeknownst to you, the baths had emptied and you were alone.

"I did not feel you flutter, and I am not yet clean."

---

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[joker-and-a-fool]

disabled people who can't drive no one understands us

abled people don't understand the idea that you just...can't drive! that we have to rely on public transit or other people just to leave our houses! it's an isolating feeling, especially when you have to go through applications just to use the disabled transit programs.

my mom's been trying to convince me to drive again, I was practicing around covid time and ended up giving up because we couldn't find time and I was tired of it. but now she keeps going "oh but you drove in the past!!" and blocking my explanations of why I don't want to.

but this isn't meant to be a vent, it's to support my point.

I told her I'm photosensitive and her response was that she is too but it's "gotten better with age" which sure, but if I can't keep my eyes open as a passenger, do we really want me on the road? if I have a neurological condition that makes my feet freeze up, do we want me to use the pedals? and don't even suggest hand controls, my hands are even worse. and god forbid I learn to drive and then don't get medically approved to drive.

but for some reason, these are seen as excuses.

so if you've ever gone through this, i completely understand and get it. i don't enjoy relying on others but it's what we have to do.

[v6quewrlds]

With the bengals winning against steelers, it's only right we get a blurb/imagine of after-game activities...

imagine post-game shenanigans with joe.

author's note⠀⁎⠀suggestive but no smut because i wasn't feeling it lmao

"Fuck you!" Taylor jeered at a fired-up Steelers fan who had recognized you as Joe's girlfriend, his words slurred and aggressive. You rolled your eyes, scoffing at his audacity. The two of you were attempting to join the crowd leaving the bustling stadium, your plain hoodies and baseball caps failing to allow you the privilege of blending in once the home fans began to realize their team had just been defeated by the quarterback whose girlfriend was now in their midst.

You tended to avoid attending road games due to Joe's insistence on keeping you safe. The risk of confrontation with die-hard fans was always high, especially when emotions were as raw as they are today.

When you had first told him that you had decided to go with Kia and Taylor, he had been hesitant, forcing the three of you to promise not to wear any Bengals' merchandise and to keep your heads down. No flashy game-day outfits, no screaming, and no arguing with fans. The tight game, however, had you all riled up, and you hadn't even made it through the first quarter before the excitement got the best of you.

As the crowd began to disperse, the hostility grew palpable. You noticed the glares and the muttered insults, but you ignored them. You were leaving victorious, and you weren't about to let a bunch of sour fans ruin the moment. The three of you made your way through the throng, Joe's instructions ringing in your ears: "Just get to the car and stay together."

The Uber ride back was a mix of elated chatter and nervous glances at your surroundings. Your heart raced with every honk and shout from the passing cars, but you made it without incident. Back in your hotel room, you gathered your bags and downed celebratory shots of tequila. You shuffled back to your ride to the airport, the adrenaline from the game still pumping through your veins.

The private jet was a welcome sight. A luxurious cabin in stark contrast to your economy flight into Pittsburgh last night, with its plush leather seats and the soothing hum of the engines. You felt your anxiety lift from your shoulders as you all climbed into your seats, leaving the tension of the city behind. You couldn't help but think of Joe, probably still in the locker room, dealing with the media circus that came with a victory of that magnitude.

Your phone buzzed with a FaceTime call from Joe just as you all settled into your seats, waiting for the pilot to step into the cabin to announce when you'd be taking off. Your heart skipped a beat as you saw his sweet, exhausted face fill the screen. "Hey, baby," he said, his voice hoarse from yelling throughout the game. "You guys get out okay?"

You grinned, your friends leaning in to say hello. "Yeah, we're all good. Just about to take off." You gestured to the plush interior. "Thanks for the upgrade," you teased, your eyes sparkling.

Joe chuckled, his eyes crinkling at the corners. "Couldn't have my girl and her entourage flying coach in enemy territory," he quipped. His gaze lingered on your lips, the exhaustion giving way to something more heated. "You look good, babe, even through this screen."

Taylor and Kia giggled, making lewd gestures behind your head, egging Joe on. He rolled his eyes playfully and leaned closer to the screen, his voice dropping an octave. "You better be ready for me when I get home. We've got some celebrating to do," he murmured, his eyes darkening with desire.

You couldn't help but laugh as your friends gasped in faux shock at Joe's suggestive tone. "I saw that! You disgusting pervert!" Kia exclaimed dramatically, referencing the TikTok with a grin, and pointing at the screen. Joe's grin only widened, his shoulders shaking as he tried to keep his voice low.

"I'll be waiting," you said with a knowing smile, your voice thick with anticipation. You hung up as Joe was called for press duties and turned to your friends, who were speaking with the pilot.

By the time you touched down in Cincinnati and made it home, you had mentally decided on the perfect way to greet Joe. You changed into his favorite lingerie set, a black lace number that hugged your curves just right. The scent of vanilla and champagne filled the room as you popped the cork on the bottle and filled two flutes. The bubbles danced in the light as you set them on the kitchen island, waiting for the moment Joe walked through the door.

Your heart pounded in your chest as you heard the garage door open and the sound of Joe's footsteps echoing through the hallway. He looked exhausted, his jaw tight, but the sight of you dressed like that brought a lazy smile to his face. He dropped his bag and shrugged out of his coat protecting him from the falling snow. "Damn, you weren't kidding," he murmured, his eyes devouring you.

You walked over to him, placing a flute in his hand and whispering, "You told me to be ready, didn't you?" You balanced your flute in your other hand, lifting it to clink against his. The sound of your glasses meeting filled the room, a tiny promise of what the night would hold.

Joe took a sip, his eyes focused on yours. He could feel his body responding to you, the ache from the game's physicality forgotten. He took you in, his eyes tracing the curves of your lingerie-clad body, the way your skin seemed to glow against the black lace. "You're going to be the death of me," he muttered under his breath, a hint of a smirk playing on his lips. "Do a spin for me, pretty girl."

You rolled your eyes, but the playful challenge in Joe's voice made you smile. You twirled around, the lingerie hugging you in all the right places, the flimsy material leaving little to the imagination. You felt a rush of power and excitement as Joe's eyes widened and he took a sharp breath in. You knew he liked what he saw.

He threw back the rest of his drink, the liquid sliding down his throat as he stepped closer to you, setting his empty glass aside. "Come here," he said, his voice gruff and low. You felt your heart flutter as you stepped into his embrace. The warmth of his body was a stark contrast to the cold air outside, his arms wrapping around you tightly. He kissed you deeply, his hands exploring your curves. The taste of victory and the promise of a night of passion mingled in the air, electrifying your every touch.

"I'm glad you like it," you said, your voice teasing, as Joe's hands roamed your body. You felt the heat between you build, his touch setting your skin on fire. "But first," you whispered, pulling away slightly, "I need to check on that head of yours."

Joe's smile immediately faded, and he sighed. "Babe, I'm fine." But you were insistent.

You had seen the hit replayed over and over on the screens in the stadium. The way he had been pancaked, face first, to the ground had made your heart stop for a moment. You were paralyzed from your seat, silently praying as the trainers rushed onto the field. When he finally stood up and walked off the field, you felt a mix of relief and anger. Relief that he wasn't seriously injured, anger that he was still so woefully under-protected years into his time with the Bengals.

"Just let me take a look," you said, taking his face in your hands and turning him so the light from the kitchen illuminated his skin. His eyes searched yours with an annoyed look that you ignored. You knew he was trying to gauge whether you were just worried or if you were about to turn into Meredith Grey.

He grumbled but allowed you to inspect his head, his hands resting gently on your hips, thumbs tracing the lines of the lace pressed against your skin. You felt a slight bump on his forehead, but there was no bruising to be seen. "It's just a little swollen," you said, your voice tight with concern. "Are you sure you don't have a concussion?"

"I'm fine, babe," Joe said firmly, his patience waning. He knew you meant well, but the adrenaline from winning had his body humming with need, and your gentle fussing was only making it harder to focus on claiming his reward. "They checked me out already."

Your eyes squinted skeptically. "Sure, the 'unaffiliated' neurological consultant who's hired by the NFL and defers to the team doctor," you quipped, unable to let go of your concern.

Joe huffed again, rolling his eyes. "Look, if there was something serious, they wouldn't have cleared me to finish the game," he said, trying to soothe your fears. "And you know the Players Association pays them too."

You pursed your lips, "Fine," you conceded, letting your hands drop to his chest. "But if you start feeling weird, or you get a headache, or anything, promise me you'll tell me. I'm serious about that, Joe."

"I promise," he said, leaning in to kiss you again. His hand slid down your back, caressing the soft skin above the lace. You felt the tension in your body start to dissolve as his mouth moved to your neck, kissing and nibbling the sensitive flesh. His hands roamed lower, cupping your ass and pulling you closer to him.

"Someone's eager," you murmured, a hint of laughter in your voice as Joe's hands grew more insistent, obviously trying to ignore your fussing. You knew the game had taken a lot out of him, but you also knew the effect you had on him, and it was clear he wasn't going to let a little fear get in the way of celebrating. You wrapped your arms around his neck, pulling him closer, the brief tension forgotten as your bodies met.

"I'm trying to fuck, and you want to give me a medical exam?" Joe chuckled against your skin, his voice muffled in the crook of your neck. His hands grew bolder, slipping beneath the lace to cup your breasts. Your laugh turned into a moan as his thumbs brushed over your nipples. The sound sent a jolt of desire straight to Joe's core, his cock thickening as he felt you respond.

"I can't help it," you murmured, your eyes fluttering closed as your hands drifted from his chest to the back of his head. You sighed softly as he nibbled tentatively at the edge of your jaw.

"You're my baby, and I want you to stay my baby." Your voice was filled with a mix of concern and desire that made Joe's heart swell. He kissed you again, his tongue sliding into your mouth, tasting the sweetness of the champagne. He could feel the urgency building between you, the need to celebrate his victory in the most intimate way possible.

[chaengluva]

hiii what about a regina x reader where they were childhood best friends but reader moves away. but reader moves back and goes to north shore and unfortunately sees regina acting like a bitch to someone and feels disgusted that regina turned out that way. happy ending though if that’s possible😭 idk if that makes sense😭

Childhood

Regina x Fem!Reader

I published this on wattpad ages ago and completely forgot about the request, IM SO SORRY.

I don’t know if i wrote this the exact way you wanted, so i tried my best, let me know if you want a part two.

Warnings: Mention of bullying, slight angst, nothing much more

You stare out your bedroom window, looking at the driveway of the house across the road. You begin to get bored as you have been waiting for the past hour for your best friend to come back. She had been gone for weeks, and you miss her so much. You spend every day together, talking, playing, and walking to school together (with your parents, of course).

That wasn't the point; the point was that you missed your best friend and were sick of waiting. "Mommy!" You whine, crawling downstairs to see your mom, cleaning up the kitchen. "Mommy, when is she coming back?" You ask, tugging at your mom's shirt. "I'm sorry, sweetheart; I don't know. But I'm sure she'll be back soon," your mom replies, giving you a reassuring smile. You sigh, feeling a mixture of impatience and excitement at the thought of finally reuniting with your best friend after what felt like an eternity. 

You decide to go back to your room and continue waiting, hoping that she'll come back any minute now.

Regina's family had left for a road trip a few weeks ago, and when you called her on your mom's phone last night, she said she would be back for your birthday, but it was 11 a.m. and she wasn't there, and your party is at 1 p.m. 

You start to feel a pang of worry creep up inside you. What if something had happened on their trip? What if Regina couldn't make it back in time for your birthday party? You try to push these negative thoughts out of your mind, reminding yourself that Regina is a reliable and responsible person.

As the minutes tick by, you can't help but keep checking the clock, hoping to see her familiar face walk through the front door any moment now.

Meanwhile, Regina and her family are in the car.

"Mom! Are we there yet?" Regina whined, asking the same question for the hundredth time. Regina reserved the same answer: "Not yet, baby." Her mom said it with a frown. Regina's heart sank as she glanced at the time on her phone, realising just how late they were running.

She couldn't shake the guilt of potentially missing her friend's birthday party. Her mom exchanged a worried glance with her dad, silently hoping they would make it in time. Regina tried to distract herself by imagining the smile on her friend's face when she finally arrived, but the sinking feeling in her stomach wouldn't go away.

Regina rolled her eyes. "Mom! It's Y/N's birthday! She was there for my 8th birthday." Regina pleaded with tears falling down her eyes; she then felt the car come to a stop and say, "We are here." Regina's mom said. Regina happily jumped out of the car, running up to your house and knocking on the door. She didn't stop knocking until the door was opened.

"Regina!" An equally happy you on the other side of the door said excitedly, bringing the blonde inside and giving her a hug. The two of you stayed in the hug for a while; you missed each other so much. Your mom walked in when she heard the two of you planning to talk with Regina's mom. When she walked past Regina, her eyes went wide.

"Regina? Have you gotten taller again?" The young girl's face went red, and her eyes looked at the floor. "Mom! Don't say that!" you exclaimed. "It's okay, Y/N. I mean, you are short, and you will always be short, so I will always protect you." Regina reminds me, with a smile on her face.

The two of you rush up to your room. You jump on the bed, and Regina does the same after you. "Happy birthday," Regina said, pulling out a gift bag. You gasp, grabbing the bag and opening it. Inside was a jelly cat bunny and a matching necklace to the one Regina was wearing. "Put it on me!" you say, and she smiles, putting it on you.

The people at the party started to come over. You had an amazing time, opened a lot of gifts, and ate a lot of cake. It was now 6 p.m., and everyone had left except for Regina and her mom. You and Regina were currently sitting on the couch, your heads in her lap, watching for Nemo.

"Regina! Y/n, Can you two come here?" You heard your mom's voice yell from the kitchen. You and Regina raced to the kitchen, smiling when they saw both your moms talking, but they didn't look happy.

"Can you please sit down?" Your mom asks, and you cluelessly both sit down next to each other, facing them. There was a small moment of silence before your mom spoke up, "Y/n, baby, I have some news." Your mom said quietly, and you listened closely, waiting for her to say something.

"We are moving tomorrow," she says.

You feel your heart break; you didn't want to be away from Regina; she was your best friend, and you couldn't survive without seeing her every day. "Houses? Schools? Or": You ask, tears starting to form. "Both, and states," your mom says. You look down and play with your figures, so annoyed with how she didn't tell you earlier.

The whole move happened so fast, and before you knew it, you were standing outside your house with your things backed away, holding the stuffed animal that Regina got you, and wearing the necklace.

She pulled you in for a hug. You stayed in her arms and cried. You didn't stop holding her until your mom said it was time to go. "We will see each other one day." Regina recalled, You nodded, walking into the car and saying goodbye, which could be for the last time.

~

Present Time

And you were moving back to your old state. The move to New York was good but your dad lost his job, he got a new one back where you used to live. You were slightly nervous that you would bump into people that you used to be friends with, mainly Regina.

You were nervous as you looked at your new school, moving into a new school in senior year was interesting but you couldn't really do anything about it. You walk inside the school and immediately feel out of place, like you don't belong.

You walk inside into a classroom that you think is your home room and the first thing you see is a girl dressed in all black, sitting on a table, with her feet up on an empty table beside her, you look at her for a second and you gasp when you realise who it is.

You walk up to her with a smile on your face, "Regina! Oh my god! It's been so long!" You exclaim, moving to sit next to her, she rolls her eyes at you, not moving her feet from the desk you were sitting at.

"Do I know you?" She asks, voice bitter, not sweet and caring like you remembered, "Yeah, we used to be friends-" you start but she cuts you off, "First off all, It was a rhetorical question, dumbass, second of all, I would never be friends with you." You frown at her words and get up and move from the desk, you were worried that you had mistaken her for someone else.

You later found out that it was Regina, you found out that she was a bitch, she was a bully and treated the whole school like shit.

But that was your old best friend and you were going to prove it to her, and you knew exactly how to do it.

It was lunch time and you walked into the cafeteria, you walked past everyone and they stared at you as you walked to the plastics table.

Regina started up at you as she felt your presence, she was about to tell you to fuck off but you beat her to it, you throw the necklace that she got you 9 years ago, for your birthday and she looked at it for a few seconds before she finally realised who you were. She stood up and grabbed your hand.

"Y/n." She whispered. 

[leascorner]

j.s. | Welcome home

Summary: After a mission, Jake gets some well deserved break at home. However the week might not turn out how he had planned.

Pairing:  Jake ‘Hangman’ Seresin x childhood bff!f!reader

Warnings: Angst, mention of death and near death experience, mention of break-up, probably inexact american army facts, ever most likely inexact description of Texas, mention of food, two idiots in love, happy ending

Word Count: 9.2k

A/N: I've said it before, I will say it again. The only trope that I can write/read about Jake is a childhood/best friends to lovers, don't fight me. I also see Jake as an older brother to two half-sisters his mother had with a very good man, after his father abandonned them. This is my canon.

Anyway, this is way too long and way too chaotic but I just couldn't stop writting so enjoy!

Masterlist

Y/N was literally hopping up and down with impatience - or perhaps was it the three cups of coffees she had drunk to be able to keep up with the 2-hour-long drive to the airport in the middle of the night. She was standing on the arrival floors, on her tiptoes, trying to locate the person she was picking up. The flow of travellers coming through the arrival doors was continuous, so many blond heads coming through and none of them was his.

Her childhood best friend’s flight had landed a dozen of minutes prior; 3:28 a.m. was the time she received a “be right there, see you soon” text. Ever since then, the seconds had been going past very - very - slowly and with every second passing, Y/N chest had got narrower from anticipation to the point she felt like she couldn’t breathe. It hadn’t been more than a year and a half now that they had seen each other in the flesh. Of course, there were the texts, the emails and the FaceTime calls, but it was never the same.

“Jake!”

The sea of people in front of them seemed to split in half to let them collide in one another. The said Jake let his bag fall to his feet to catch a flying Y/N, lifting her from the ground as if she weighted nothing. Her hands found the back of his neck and her head found the crook of his neck, reuniting their bodies as if they were only one mind.

“Hey sweetheart,” he sniffed her hair, intoxicating himself from her perfume.

Jake let her down reluctantly when he realized they were in the way of other people reunions. After swinging his bag over his shoulder and dragging her near a row of seats, he finally took a good look at her, dark circles under puffy red eyes and hair all other the place. He dried her tears softly and kissed the top of her head, something he was sure he hadn’t done since they were in high school and that fucker of Chad had broken up her heart - thinking of it now, it seemed like it was a lifetime away. However, he knew that in this moment there was no sadness in her tears. She was crying probably a little happiness to seeing him again, but most certainly a lot of relief to have him alive in front of her.

He took another step back to have an even greater look at her. Y/N was exactly how he last saw her one year or so ago, and exactly how she looked like even all the other times he had to leave. She did not seem to age, and he was sure that the fine smile lines she was now wearing had always been there. It brought comfort to his heart to know that whatever would happen, she would always be waiting for him. He knew it was also selfish, but he had made peace with those thoughts a long time ago. These were moments that he was collecting in his mind for when he was somewhere overseas, fighting for his life.

“My my, did you grow up a few inches?”

“Oh, shut up!” Y/N laughed and tried to nudge him in the ribs. Jake easily grabbed her right elbow to bring her closer in another embrace, so very glad to be home, even only for a little while.

Ventilation was swinging litters of hot air into the car's cabin as it was a rather chilly night for October in Texas. The full moon was lighting up all the roads in front of them, just as if it was making sure they would get home safely.

During the drive, the main discussion turned around how excited everyone would be to have him there. Y/N and her parents were the only ones to know about Jake’s surprise visit; they had only known for about three days before his flight landed that he unexpectedly got a week of leave. They would surprise his family later that day for lunch - only after they both had a rather long nap to make up for the sleepless night.

Jake had seen his family a couple more times than Y/N this past year and a half. Even if he considered Y/N to be family, this wasn’t exactly the rule of the administration. Blood family had some more privileges, like sometimes visiting for the holidays. His mother and one of his little sisters also visited him in Singapore when he was stationed there for an exercise in the Taiwan Strait; they had booked a vacation to be able to see him there. Y/N, at that time, had been unavailable - she had her own life after all.

It was what Jake found the more difficult; to keep up with her life. Most of her friends were common friends from high school. With her going to a different university and later with her different jobs, some of her friends were total strangers to him. However, they all seemed to come and go into her life, leaving more or less damage.

“I am sorry about you and Nick.”

Y/N finished getting back to the right line of the highway and removing the blinker, before glancing quickly in Jake’s direction. He was looking at her, with an expression she couldn’t quite read, but that she understood as some kind of gladness. She sighed while turning her focus back on the road.

“You can lie better than that, Jake.”

“Well, didn’t like the guy so…”

It had been a couple of months now than her longtime boyfriend Nick and she had broken up. What confused Jake the most was how this was not a topic for discussion. She hadn’t called crying; she did not seem to be angry. She just announced it to him like it was nothing and directly switched subject. He hadn’t found a way to bring it back on the table, so he asked their friends and family. They all had the same answer; she was doing fine. She seemed to have continued her life just like nothing had happened.

“Was it him-”

“It was me,” Y/N cut him off quickly abruptly, leaving Jake with an uneasy feeling. She sighed again, probably realizing how harsh her tone had been. “This wasn’t working out anyway.”

Though she could not see him, Jake nodded back acknowledging her response. He still felt like there were more to it, but he understood that now wasn’t the time to discuss it. Ever since they had known each other - and it went back to kindergarten, they hadn’t had many secrets for one another. And if they had, it was never anything major.

So, he shook off this feeling and gently grabbed her hand resting on the gearshift to squeeze it softly.

“I do am sorry, though.”

“I know.”

It was nearly six in the morning when Y/N pulled up in her parents’ driveway.

The porch light was on, welcoming them, making sure Jake knew he was expected, and it made him smile fondly. It still felt surreal somehow; after everything, he was home. Getting out of the car, he breathed the fresh air of Texas like he hadn’t breathed in years.

Y/N was already opening her trunk, getting out a duffel bag that seemed to contain some clothes for today. Jake jogged toward her before she was able to get his own khaki bag out. She rolled her eyes, smiling, when he gently slapped her hands away to take care of it.

“Mom set up a spare bed in my room,” Y/N informed him while walking to the front door. “Just like the old days.”

And nothing in the house had changed either.

The hallway was still a drive along memories with all sorts of pictures hanged upon the wall. Y/N’s parents wedding portrait. Y/N’s baby pictures. Y/N on the day of the start of her first kindergarten year - just before they met each other. A couple more of first day of school pictures - this time with him in it as well. A couple of family vacation pictures. And along with them, a couple of pictures of events he wasn’t even there to attend. Y/N’s university graduation, her parents’ thirty-year anniversary celebration party, her first promotion celebration dinner…

The kitchen was still on the right, the living room on the left and straight ahead the stairs to the bedrooms. Y/N’s bedroom still had Justin Timberlake poster hung up on the walls along with some pictures of friends and family. The teddy bear he won for her at the funfair when they were not even ten stood on her bed. Jake swore that if he opened the dresser, he would still find the shelf that was for his stuff back then.

Without many words, both of them got ready for bed. Y/N took the en-suite bathroom first and when Jake got back in his sweatpants, she was already in bed, cuddling Mister B the teddy bear. His chuckle made her look up to him with sleepy eyes and quickly look away when she realized he didn’t wear a shirt. He kissed her on her forehead before tugging her more tightly in her sheets and turning off the bedside lamp.

“Do you remember when I couldn’t sleep unless someone was holding my hand?”

Jake only hummed in answer, and even in the darkness of her room, his hand found hers instinctively. Their fingers intertwining immediately, he did just as he had promised when he was only just a kid; he never let it go.

“Son,” Y/N’s father spoke from the other side of the kitchen, “don’t worry about it.”

Jake shook his head, smiling, before proceeding with what he was already doing: loading the cup he had used to drink coffee in the dishwasher. Ever since he had been up earlier that morning, Y/N’s parents had pampered him with all their attention while also being busy preparing lunch. Every time he asked if they needed help, they would assure him he just needed to stay put in his seat.

It had always been like this, for as long as he had remembered. Whenever he had gone over when Y/N and he were still in middle school, her parents had always taken good care of him, making sure the crust of his PB&J sandwiches were cut off, putting on his favourite beddings when they were having a sleepover, drying his clothes in the air dryer when they came home soaking wet from the park. He felt loved in a different way than he did at home, where he had a hard time adjusting to his new family dynamics with his two younger step-sitters. Growing up, they continued on listening to him and caring for him. Y/N’s father was the one he went to for advice before he enrolled. Ever since, and with the little time he had with them every time he came home, it still hit him in the face how much they loved him like he was their own son.

“Do you need help with anything?” He asked once more.

This time, they did not have time to answer. Y/N appeared on the doorstep, changed out of her pyjamas, hair still wet. “The shower is all yours, Jake.”

She watched him go as if she had to make sure he remembered the way to her room. She hadn’t really realized yet that he was really here, with them, and feared that he would just disappear at any minute or that she would just wake up from whatever dream she was having. Somehow this also seemed to be all too familiar, like a play they had rehearsed a hundred time before. It broke her heart a little to know this was most likely not going to happen again before a very long time, that it could actually never happen again.

Y/N got this thought out of her head as soon as it came. She didn’t need to think about this. Not now. Not ever. She just needed to enjoy whatever time she had with him at home.

“He looks good,” her mum stated once Jake had made it to the top of the stairs.

“Yeah, he does,” Y/N spoke softly, eyes lingering to where Jake had been only a couple of seconds before, suddenly wondering if he was really as good as they thought.

When Jake got back to the kitchen the entrance clock had just struck eleven. Only sixty minutes until he would be reunited with his family. It never felt more real, but he couldn’t quite realize it. He was so used of being far away from them, totally disconnected from their realities, hearing their news after everyone else. Yet, he had always found them as he had left them, eyes watering to see him home or gone.

He joined Y/N on the vegetable preparation. Washing, peeling, cutting kept him busy while the anticipation started to build up. All while Y/N’s father asked him about what new manoeuvres he had learned. Being an aviator himself, they could talk about flying for hours to Y/N’s greatest damn; she had the biggest fear of flying - and perhaps the fact that Jake nearly crashed them while flying an old aircraft he had restored with her father when they were teenagers had something to do with it.

“These boys,” Y/N’s mother sighed playfully as Jake and Y/F/N were debating whatever solar planes were the future of aviation. Y/N smiled as she shared a knowing look with her mother, who was getting ready to lay the table in the dining room.

“Mom, hold on,” Y/N called before reaching inside the cupboard next to her, “you are missing a plate.”

“Why? Is Mark coming after all?”

Y/M/N’s face went white in only a second as she realized what she had just said. Not knowing what to do else, Y/N handed her the white plate. Looking sideways to Jake, she hoped he hadn’t heard - she didn’t want him to find out like this, when his whole family was going to be here in the next thirty minutes.

It was already too late though; Jake’s attention had of course switched to their awkward interaction. Her father was quick to step in, wiping his hands on a cloth and moving towards his wife.

“Of course he is, darling. Let me help you bring those into the dining room.”

Y/N watched them disappear before quickly turning back to the carrots she was now cutting in a Julienne, praying Jake would just drop the subject. Ever since she had learned that Jake was having a leave, she had planned their reunion to be perfect. She had purposely lied to his family, pretending to have a very big news to share with them so they all agreed to gather even if the atmosphere was not good. She had made them promise to bury the hatchet, for “her” and most absolutely for Jack. Whatever touchy topics they would have to talk about, they could do it after.

“Why wouldn’t he come?” Jake still asked and, at that moment, she knew that whatever she would tell him would never be sufficient to not draw his suspicion any further. She couldn’t lie to him even if she tried.

“Just been busing with work lately, you know how it is.”

Without letting him time to ask more questions, Y/N went for the stoves to make sure the sauce was still reducing as it should have. She could feel Jake’s eyes burning holes on her back and could only hope he would drop the subject.

“Jake, son,” Y/F/N had just gotten back from the dining room, “would you mind giving me a hand with the roast?”

After taking a last look at Y/N, still very focused on stirring the sauce, Jake turned to her father. It wasn’t until she didn’t feel his eyes on her that she turned to look at him. She watched as her father made him took out the turkey so he could put some more butter on it. Out of the corner of his eye his father gives him a reassuring wink signalling her he had got this.

The bell rang at the exact same moment Y/N put the last plate of hors d’oeuvres at the centre of the table. Shooting a look across the piece, she saw her father squeezing Jake’s shoulder in what seemed to comfort him. She smiled shyly, trying to hide her own nervousness. Thanks to her father, Jake had nearly forgotten about the earlier incident about Mark and the reason he wouldn’t have been able to make it. He hadn’t asked any other questions, and they hadn’t given away other secrets. All was well in the best of all words, or so she still tried to convince herself. It was all that mattered.

“Just like we said, you both stay here, and we’ll bring them for you.”

Y/N watched as her parents disappeared in the hall. She turned to Jake who she now realized he was close at her side - she knew from the way his lips were set in a tight smile that he was somehow nervous. When noises started coming from the hall, Y/N grabbed Jake’s hand without thinking. She needed him to know she was there, that she would always be there, just like they promised when they were younger. It would take much more than a thousand of miles and a few hiccups to take them apart. As if he was thinking the exact same thing, Jake squeezed her hand back.

Jake’s step-dad was the first to enter the dining room. Y/N saw his eyes go from herself to Jake right next to her side, his eyes lighting up in realization. Yet, he didn’t say anything, holding a finger to his lips to let them know he would stay silent while moving further into the room as if nothing had happened. He and Jake had never been particularly close; he was a good man, a good husband, and a good father to his daughters, but Jake’s fatherly figure had always been Y/N’s father.

Next to enter the room was Jake’s youngest step-sister, Sophia. She immediately spotted him, letting out a cry and running into his arms. He crushed his sister in one of those same hugs he gave Y/N when she picked him up from the airport. It warmed her heart to see them like that. Sophia was still very young when Jake had enrolled; she was only just a kid and had grown up with the lack of his older brother. She was looking up to him so much that Y/N had sometimes to remind her that he didn’t have only qualities. He was her hero in so many ways…

Sophia’s reaction got the rest of the family - his mother, Olivia, his other step-sister, and his step-brother, Mark - in the dining room quite quickly. There were a lot of “Jake!” shouted from across the room and loads of tears, happy smiles, and hugs.

“I can’t believe he is here.” Sophia cried again; this time she was in Y/N’s arms. “And I can’t believe you lied to us.”

“Sorry not sorry,” Y/N smiled, tugging a string of her hair behind her ears before bringing her in an even closer hug if it was possible. She wasn’t sure she had seen her this happy in her life, she realized.

Y/N was an only child with a very little family. Over the years, Jake’s family had grown to be her own as well. As children first, as they were always all together at either one’s house or the others. As teenagers when his step-sisters weren’t babies anymore and they had started to be able to play more with them. She remembered helping his mom getting both of his sisters ready for school, all of them celebrating Christmas at her parents or going dress shopping for Olivia’s first prom.

Ever since Jake had been deployed on the West Coast and later overseas, they had grown even closer. There were brunches on Sundays, just the three of them, where Sophia would file them up on her latest dating adventures. There were lunches at Olivia’s office after they had taken a midday yoga class. There were breakfasts with Sophia before her classes began. Y/N had always made sure they were alright, as if she had to do it for Jake.

So far, the lunch had turned out great.

Jake had told them all about his last position and this group of pilots he had been joining overseas. Everyone had started feeding him bits and pieces of what had occurred ever since the last time he’s been home. Olivia and Mark had managed not to fight, which was a miracle in itself, per Y/N’s opinion. Jake’s mom had finally stopped crying. And Sophia seemed to have forgotten about those hard choices she would have to make once she graduated from college at the end of the year.

At least, that was the case until Jake asked about it.

“So, any thoughts yet about what you’ll do next year?”

“No, not really.”

Y/N had already seen that look on Sophia’s face. It was the same one she made when she was hesitating between an avocado toast and pancakes at the place they were used to going to brunch; every time she had been making this face, she had ended up with ordering both. Sophia eyed her tentatively and Y/N immediately shook her head no, silently pleading her not to do whatever she was thinking.

Today was not the day. Jake had only gotten back from abroad hours ago, they would have enough time to discuss it in the next couple of days.

“I am thinking of enrolling,” Sophia stated abruptly.

Boom.

The bomb had landed.

Y/N sighed, mentally cursing Sophia for needing whatever validation from him. They all had talked about this extensively for months on now. Decide to enrol was one thing, accept that one of your relative would do the same was another. She knew how Jake was; he didn’t look like it at first sight, but his family was his everything. He had made the selfish decision that could result in them losing him forever, yet he wouldn’t accept that she’d do the same.

From the deathly silence that came after Sophia’s statement, Y/N rested the cutlery on the side of her plate, bracing herself for whatever had to come. Her attitude made Jake immediately turned to her. She had never seen the wrinkle between his eyebrows this deep before. She didn’t know if it was from dread, disappointment, or anger.

“You knew?”

Jaw tight, Y/N didn’t answer, and Jake huffed - of course, she knew. How could she not? She was here, with his own family, when he was thousands of miles away fighting for his country. She was here, only a ride away, when he couldn’t even remember the last time he had enough telephone network to FaceTime them. She was there, physically with them, when he was just a ghost, present for a few days a year before disappearing for months on hand.

Y/N tried to reach out for his left arm to try and calm the whole situation down, but he moved ever so slightly she couldn’t touch him. The fire in Jake’s green eyes was incandescent. He was angry, with Sophia, with her, with everyone. And to know he didn’t even know half of it…

“Let’s not start now,” his older step-sister stepped in to try and reason him.

“Why?” Jake retorted immediately. “Wanna updates me on what is going on with Mark as well?”

Olivia opened her mouth to answer and as she couldn’t seem to find something to say, she then closed it and lowered her head. She and Mark had officially announced a few weeks before Jake returned that they were going to take some time apart. They had been married for nearly three years and they were having a rough path. They had started couple therapy, trying to make things work. Y/N couldn’t count the hours Olivia had spent on her couch, crying and eating ice-creams.

Y/N knew exactly how she felt like. The deception of thinking she had found the love of her life only to realize it was more complex than this. The sadness of loving someone and it still not being enough for the two of them to be happy. The paralyzing fear of being alone, of never being well enough.

She needed a shoulder to cry onto and a lot of love, and not to be reminded of what a failure she thought she was.

“I am sorry,” Sophia mumbled. Y/N wasn’t sure to whom she was apologizing. Jake? Them?

“You can’t seriously be thinking about it?” Jake half-shouted, pointing her finger at her like he was accusing her of the worst betrayal.

“Don’t say anything you’d regret, son.”

Y/N’s father word seemed to put some sense into him as he leaned his back against his chair, folding his arms against his chest. The distress on Sophia’s face was now palpable and she was on the verge of crying from Jake’s quite violent reaction. Though she didn’t expect Jake to be totally supportive, Y/N had not expected him to reject the idea that much either. She had thought that he would’ve still listen to her reasons, maybe try to talk her out of it, but finally make peace with the idea. Just like they had. Just like they all had when he was in her shoes.

Olivia had regained her composure and wrapped an arm around her sister’ shoulders. The look she sent Jake probably refrained him from attacking again his little sister. Instead, he chose another target for his anger.

“How can anybody be cool with this?”

Before Jake’s mom could speak, Y/N called him out. “Why could you do it and not her, Jake, huh?” She wants to be like you so bad, don’t you see?

“That’s not the same thing.”

Y/N huffed and rolled her eyes.

It made her even bitter. For all the things he hadn’t told her when he had no reason to hide it from her. For him being hurt that they didn’t want to discuss as such important topics over the phone. She would have liked to be sorry to hide all this from him, yet his reaction had only comfort her on her choice.

“You’re being unfair.”

“Am I now?” he laughed. “Excuse me for putting my life at sake and not wishing for me sister to do the same.”

“Did anybody ask you to? If anything, we would all have loved to keep you by our side.”

“Oh, I see. So, this is all my fault, right?”

The daring look he offered her made her heart jump in her chest. Her stomach was in fire; consuming her from the inside. She was tired from the sleepless nights she had for the last few months. And sad about the outcome of this lunch. And disappointed in him. And quite frankly done with his attitude.

Sighing, she gave in and looked away, throwing her napkin on her plate at the same time. Whatever this was, it was too much for her to handle. “If you’d excuse me,” she announced as she moved her chair back. “I am not hungry anymore.”

“Y/N-” he called after her, grabbing her arm to make her stay. She gave him a pained look before abruptly pulling away from his grip.

“Welcome home, Jake.”

Jake’s face appeared once again on her phone screen.

Big bright smile, sunglasses on the bridge of his nose, forehead sun-kissed by the first rays of sunshine of spring. The picture had been taken one of the few times she had fly out to California to visit him. They had such a good time that Y/N used to hold all those memories close to her heart. Now, she couldn’t even look at it.

She couldn’t count the number of texts Jake had sent nor the number of messages he had left on her voice mail. She hadn’t read nor listened to any of them and had even decided to turn off her phone at some point during the night. She needed some time alone to take a breath and to swallow the disappointment that was forming a lump in her throat.

Despite the emotional roller coaster this day had been, she hadn't fallen asleep until late in the night, turning over in the sheet nonstop while thinking of all the comebacks she could have said to his face. And like every other night for months now, when she had finally managed to get some sleep, her worst nightmare had woken her up a couple of hours later.

It only made her feel worse and she cried all the tears in her body. It was like whatever emotion she had retained in the last year had come back to her like a wrecking ball. She was angry for all sorts of reasons all linked to Jake one way or another. She was also very sad of the situation she found herself into, of Jake having spoiled their reunion, of the spectacle she had given in front of her loved ones.

So, when she turned on her phone a few hours later, eyes still puffy and red from the lack of sleep and the crying, she didn’t hesitate to turn down his call when his smiley face appeared on her phone screen. At that time, she discovered the multiple texts and missed calls of her parents and Jake’s sisters. She sent them a quick group message, letting them know she was fine and that she would catch up later. Leaving her phone on the kitchen counter, she got ready for her day.

Her phone rang four more times while she was getting ready. She was now determined to let him know to leave her alone. She was still pissed, and she needed to compose herself. This was without counting on the doorbell ringing when she was about to answer her phone.

Stopping whatever she was doing, she made the few steps from the kitchen counter to her apartment door, opening it without even thinking who she would find behind. Much to her surprise it was the only person she didn’t want to see. Jake. Standing there, phone in his hand.

“Oh, come on!” he exclaimed when she nearly shut the door in his face.

He stopped it before it was fully closed and after a deep sigh, Y/N let him in without even giving him a look. She closed the door behind him, passing him - still without looking at him - and went to the living room. She leaned against the kitchen counter, crossing her arms on her chest much like he had done during lunch just the day before.

Jake stood in the middle of the room, watching around him. It was the first time he was in her new place, the one she started rented after she broke up with her long-term boyfriend. It wasn’t much, only a one-bedroom apartment with a sanitized decor - she hadn’t had the heart to make it her own. It was close to her work and not a too long drive from her parents; it was all she really needed.

Y/N studied him in silence. He must not have had the memo about the Texas weather at that time of the year as he was only wearing a beige sweater, sleeves rolled up. It wasn’t much of a surprise he had forgotten how it was; he had spent so little time home in the last ten years.

When her eyes finally got to his face, she realized he was now staring at her. She tried reading him like she could before, but what she found in his eyes, she couldn’t interpret. Perhaps something had been broken between them. Perhaps there were only so much absence someone could handle. Perhaps they had let the miles come in between them for real this time.

She couldn’t tell how long they stayed like this before he finally spoke.

“Why didn’t you tell me?”

Long gone was the hope she had that he would apologize.

Jake had never been one to be wrong; he was probably even the most stubborn person she had ever met. Though she liked this confidence in him, she also knew it was hiding something much deeper. His trauma of being abandoned by his father when he was still a toddler. The fear of his loved ones realizing what a failure he was, despite everything he had already accomplished. The fear of never being enough.

He had assured her it wasn’t one of the reasons he had enrolled, and she knew he was lying to her just as much he was lying to himself. But she wasn’t her twenty-something-self; she wasn’t going to protect his feelings anymore. Now that they didn’t have an audience, she could lay her cards on the table.

“Do you mean, just like you didn’t tell us about the ejection seat accident that you had six months ago?”

She saw his face drop ever so slightly before he regained his composure back. She wasn’t the only one keeping things from him, yet contrary to him, the things she was keeping a secret weren’t really hers anyway.

“How would you know?”

“Javy called me that time,” she stated dryly, memories of the call she got in the middle of the night flowing to her head. She still had nightmares about it most nights. “He wanted me to know in case your brain injury worsened, and they had to call your family.”

This secret, she had never told anyone and had carried the weight of it on her own until now. She had smiled and assured everyone that all was fine for the days - sixteen in total - they didn’t hear from him; how could he, he had been literally in a 24h surveillance at the hospital. She had had Javy on the phone to report every little detail he had of Jake’s evolution. She hadn’t had sleep for weeks straight and had nearly cried when Jake had called him after a very busy and unexpected mission he took part in - another way for putting he had just got cleared from the hospital.

“It was nothing.”

“It wasn’t nothing, Jake! You got banned from flying for six weeks. Six fucking weeks!”

“And yet, it wasn’t the first time I ended up in the hospital, nor was it the last time. You know that’s part of the job.”

Y/N snorted.

Like hell she knew. The job description went with never being in the same time zone as your loved ones, missing every single milestone in their life, putting his very own safety at risk so they could all be free and safe, and omitting all details of the national security missions to which he was taking part. She was pretty sure though there was no line in his contract about lying about his health, especially when he could have died, to his family.

For some reason, this whole situation had made his absence even worse. She realized he didn’t feel safe to let them know when things had gone bad; if this time she had known, she couldn’t even imagine all those other times Javy hadn’t been there to inform her. It had awakened a visceral (and most likely also irrational) fear in her. She couldn’t bear the thought of losing him and she still wasn’t ready to accept it.

“Why is this such a big deal when you knew what was going in here and didn’t even tell me?”

If she hadn’t been this tired, Y/N would have probably walked to him to slap him. How could he compare his near-death experience to his sisters’ decisions? How could any of it be equivalent?

“This was not my truth to tell,” she only replied blankly.

Yes, she wasn’t very proud of hiding things from Jake and lying on purpose. But she wasn’t thirteen any longer and when people confided in her - when she promised she wouldn’t tell him anything - she wasn’t going to go running to her best friend to spill all the tea.

“Will you then tell me the truth about what really happened between you and the other dickhead?”

“I already told you everything,” she answered dryly, a little bit too quickly for it not to be suspicious.

“I don’t believe you.”

Y/N knew from the sound of his voice it was pure provocation. He gave her the same daring look she had just seen the day before - the same consuming flame was in his eyes - and she could see his infamous smirk dawning on his lips. She wondered why he wanted to prove just how right he was - how he was always right - so bad. It made her skin scramble how infuriating he was.

She didn’t answer right away and stared at him, arms crossed on her chest a little bit tighter to protect herself. Everything that was happening was only making her angrier towards him. He had ruined everything, and he had just decided to continue on doing so.

She had dreamt about him coming home for months and months, to have him by her side and now, she could only wish for him to go away. The anger, the pain, the animosity; it was all too much. She couldn’t keep up anymore.

“What do you want me to tell you, huh? How much of a great boyfriend and man he was, but that it still wasn’t enough? How much a horrible person I am for not being able to fall in love with a person that would devote his own life to try and make me happy?”

Jake opened his mouth to respond, but closed it as the words sank in. It all made sense to him suddenly. Why she seemed to be relieved it was all over. Why she didn’t call him after he broke her heart. Why, on the rare occasion he had discussed the break-up with his sisters, they had never talked badly about her ex-boyfriend. He didn’t break her heart. He never did.

She was the one breaking his.

“Why didn’t you just tell me?” he asked, this time his voice much softer.

How could she? When it all started with his accident - that she wasn’t even supposed to know of. When it took her five years of a stable relationship to realize her longtime boyfriend had never have been the person she wanted to spend the rest of her life with. When it took her half of her adult life to understand she had been lying to herself for almost all her life and that even now, she didn’t know her truth from her lies any more.

Knowing the truth, Jake didn’t know what to say. He wanted to feel sorry, he wanted to tell her he was. But was he really? It would be lying to say he didn’t exult when he had heard of the break-up... On the day she introduced him to Nick, they he had discussed - quite vividly - about the country actions in Afghanistan - one of the campaigns he had just come home from - and from that day, Jake had just decided he wouldn’t like the man. He hadn’t been very subtle about disliking him, but in his opinion, Nick had paid him back in his own coin: monopolizing Y/N whenever Jake had her on the phone, making her choose between the two of them when he had had the opportunity to fly her oversea. He still felt nauseous to recall how Y/N had seemed to only look at him every time Nick was in the room with them.

He made a few steps in her direction, going to comfort her, but Y/N only shook her head. She wouldn’t let any of this go so easily. It wasn’t because she had confided in him, that he now knew all the truth from her part, that everything else would be forgotten. There were still a lot of unspoken truth to uncover.

“Why are you really here, Jake?”

“What do you mean?”

“The reason you got this leave, what is it?”

They stood less than a metre away, eyes in eyes. Jake never felt so vulnerable as every time she looked at him as if she could read his soul. He knew she was looking for something. Something he couldn’t give her.

Looking away, he answered, “It’s nothing.”

“That’s what I thought.”

Y/N slipped away before he could even react. He watched as she turned back towards the front door. She opened it without a word and looked into his eyes as she stood leaned against it.

“Goodbye, Jake.”

And this time, he didn’t even try to fight.

Javy: Hey, got Hangman on the phone today. You okay?

Y/N: Did he vent at you for calling me that one time?

Javy: Almost.

Javy: He wasn’t really angry though. Just frustrated I guess.

Y/N: I bet. Wasn’t really the nice little break he must have planned.

Javy: If there is anything to learn from all this it is that truth is better spoken from the person they apply to.

Javy: You should talk to him.

Y/N: Yeah well I’ll see about that.

Jake was very nervous, and he wasn’t very nervous a lot.

In fact, he was pretty sure the last time he was that nervous was when he had picked Y/N up for their senior prom. Just like every year since starting high school, she had been his date - though Chad nearly had taken her away from him, but this dumbass had broken up with her only a couple of weeks before prom. That year, for some reason, everything felt different. High school years were coming to an end, they were both going to different universities. Everything was about to change, and it would never be the same. Jake had dreaded taking their relationship to the next level. If only he had known that despite going to different universities, Jake enrolling and basically the two of them living their life in parallel, their relationship had made it.

More or less so... It had been three days now since the lunch at her parents, two since their other discussion - if he would call this an argument, he was still unsure - and today was the first time he was seeing her since then.

After spending time with his family, he was on his way to meet with some of their childhood friends. Normally, Y/N was one of them and she had been invited. But with the recent events, he didn’t know if she would be here. He had had time to reflect on what had been said and finally had apologized to her voice mail as she wouldn’t let his calls through. He had given her plenty of time and space, sending in only a couple of good mornings and good nights texts, just like he was used to. Yet he didn’t know what to expect.

When he spotted her already sat at the table he had booked, his heart started pounding furiously. It gave him hope not everything between them had been broken.

“Hey,” Jake greeted Y/N softly when he had gotten at her level.

Y/N only nodded, barely looking at him, before continuing her discussion with their friend, Monica, like nothing had happened. Jake swallowed the lump in his throat before continuing to greet everyone around the table.

In all those diners they had had with their friends when he had been home, she would have been sat next to him, so close but merely touching. He would have had his arm resting nonchalantly on the back of her chair. He would have whispered all sorts of things in her ears, and she would have laughed open light-heartedly at every single one of his jokes.

That night, she was sat as far as possible from him and he had difficulty focusing on the group discussion, his mind going back to her every time. He probably went the whole evening looking at her not so subtly in the hope she would like to give him a look. She did not.

“You good?” Matt, sat at his side, asked him after the main course.

“Yeah,” Jake answered though the little tremor in his voice didn’t reflect confidence.

“Just give her a little time. It’s just a lot, y’know.”

Jake only nodded.

The problem was indeed just that: time. His flight back was in two days now and she was supposed to be his ride. He knew she would be able to drop him off without speaking a word, while he sat there in the agonizing silence. He was sure he was not able to do it for a couple of hours, he couldn’t imagine what it would be to not have her speak to him every again. He couldn’t get back to combat with Y/N still mad at him. He needed to fix things. He had been able to do it with his sisters; he had to do it with Y/N.

Indeed, the lunch had finished soon after Y/N’s dramatic departure. His sisters hadn’t spoken another word to him, and Y/N’s parents had tried to maintain some semblance of a conversation. Jake had taken a quick walk to clear his mind before going to his parents.

He had sat down with Olivia first and then Sophia, so they could tell him everything that had been going on. He sat there listening to what they had to say until they were done. There had been a lot of crying on their side (only a tiny little bit on his side - most likely because he had a dust in the eye, he would say). In the end, they had hugged and laughed and remembered that they loved each other and that nothing could be more important than that.

He had realized Olivia seemed much more at peace, somehow differently but also similarly to Y/N’s. She had so many plans on her side - buying a house, planning a trip to Europe, getting a puppy – as if she had just discovered she could be a unique person outside her marriage and she genuinely was happier.

The talk with Sophia had been a little bit more sensitive. The idea of her enrolling made his blood boiling, but he had remained calm – or at least tried to - and listened to her reasons. If he was afraid to see himself in her, her reasons were solely different than his. She didn’t want this only to do like him; it was more that he had paved the way for her. He had made her promise to think some more about it - at least, graduate from college before deciding anything - and he had promised to be supportive. He would have some work on himself, but he would cross that bridge when he’d get there.

They had of course talked about Y/N and how she was carrying the whole family on her shoulders. She always made sure everyone was alright, answering her phone at 3 a.m. to pick up Sophia from a frat party gone wild, welcoming Olivia in her tiny apartment - giving her the only bed to sleep on the couch, despite her protest - the time she turned things round after Mark and she had decided to take some time apart. She even made sure their mother was alright when his step-dad was away for business, bringing her homemade meals that she only had to heat up and keeping her company.

If he always knew what an amazingly caring person she was, it only proved him right. He would be forever grateful she was the first person to have talked to him on his first day of kindergarten. He would be forever grateful for the woman she was. If he was honest with himself, it all made him love her even more.

He wasn’t ready to watch her from afar - well, from much far away than his current position - but he would do it (or at least try), should she ask him to…

After what seemed to be an eternity, the evening finally came to an end.

Jake didn’t get the opportunity to speak to Y/N though he hesitated multiple times to just call her out or walk to her and demand that they had a chat. She was currently bidding goodbye to everyone in front of the restaurant, and Jake was watching her attentively to ambush her just as soon as she was finished. He didn’t care if he would be rude to anyone by not saying thank you for coming and goodbye; he needed to talk to her.

After she hugged Monica and promised to let her know when she got home safely, she reached for her car key in her bag and made her way to her car without even looking at him. Jake took his luck and followed her. He called after her, but she refused to acknowledge him.

“Can we not?”

“Why?” she turned around suddenly. “Want me to tell you anything else?”

“Y/N, please.”

She only raised an eyebrow before turning back and continuing walking. Too bad for her, Jake wasn’t one to give up this easily. He followed her lead up to her car that she started to unlock to get in. A wave of panic got through him as he could feel her slip away from his fingers and he didn’t want that. If they didn’t have this talk now, he was not sure they would have it at all.

“I only have two days left,” he said, interposing himself between the closed door and her. “Please.”

Y/N froze at only a few centimetres away from him. She seemed to think about what options she had. Unfortunately for her, there just wasn’t much as she couldn’t make Jake move even if she wanted to. So, she chose the reasonable choice. She crossed her arms over her chest and listened.

“I-” he sighed, passing a hand on his face, frustration clearly visible on his face now. “There has been an incident. We lost two men.”

Y/N’s arms immediately dropped to her side; the mask she wore on her face cracked. She could have been angry he lied to her, yet again, but this time, it was too serious. People died. The command had given them time off because of it. It only reminded her it could end at any time. She really could lose him.

“Jake,” she sighed.

“I-”

His voice broke and Y/N didn’t hesitate to go in for a hug. Out of habits, his arms found her waist and he buried his face in her hair. He breathed her perfume in, trying to ground himself and not totally lose it. She was his rock. There were no ways he would still be here if it wasn’t for her waiting for him at home.

He couldn’t lose her.

“I can only imagine the worry I cause you all,” he muttered in her hair. “I didn’t want to add anything to it.”

Y/N grabbed his face with both her hands and forced him to look at her. She wore a small frown on her eyebrows and determination in her eyes. While she was touched he wanted to spare their feelings, not knowing what was going on was even worse. She couldn’t count the number of times she had thought he was dead when an unknown number had called her phone. In order to support him the best way they could, they needed to know.

“Getting you back in one piece is our priority,” she started, voice bold as if she wanted him to engrave her words in his head. “That’s why we are keeping things to ourselves. We don’t want you to worry about us when you should be solely focused on staying alive.”

Jake half-smiled in return, which made Y/N relax a bit. Her hands fall on his shoulder as he kept her close to him, so close that there was no space between their two bodies. They had realized they wanted the exact same thing for one another: for them to be safe and sound.

“I worry about you all, all the time. I worry about you, all the time,” he confessed, his voice still low.

Jake reached out to tuck a loose string of hair behind her ear and Y/N instinctively leaned in his touch. It was like this between them, easy and pure. It always had. Sometimes - like these last past days, they were so caught up in life they seemed to forget what they had was so unique. Every time they had found their way back to each other.

“I left you alone while I am off, living my dream.”

“Don’t say it like you could have made any other choice, Jake.”

“I don’t regret it,” he answered right back. “Yet if I had to do it all over again, there are a lot of things about you that I would do a whole lot differently.”

Y/N nodded slowly, her heart rate slightly going up. If they often shared I-love-you’s more out of habits than anything else - though they were always genuine, Jake had never really expressed out loud how he felt about her, and from the electricity in the air - totally different from the explosive tension that had built up until now, she could feel there were more to it.

“It’s never too late, they say,” he smiled softly, his hand making it to the back of her neck.

Y/N hold her breath, searching in his eyes if he was being serious and if he was really wanting to finish the conversation they had started the night of their senior prom. If he wanted to do it right here, right now in a parking lot. It was a conversation that could have totally changed their life if they had it. A conversation for which they every so often imagined what they would have said if fear hadn’t stopped them.

If there were much younger back then, nothing now had changed at all.

“I’ve always been yours,” Y/N whispered. It would be lying if relief hadn’t wash over Jake. Of course he had known - he had always known - yet, hearing it was another thing.

“I know.”

Y/N’s bright eyes saw his eyes dove down to her lips, only a dozen of centimetres away she realized now, then back to her eyes. Her cheeks were burning up from the anticipation of what was to come. Yet, lost in each other’s eyes, none of them moved.

At that moment, the world could have stopped that they wouldn’t have noticed. Nothing else but them mattered.

“Well, kiss me then.”

[timeforaneclipse]

Falling Apart (Lilia Calderu x reader)

Chapter Two

Available on AO3

Warnings? - Angst hehe

      

  "Right, Mins, Time... to do your thing!" Agatha urged as she waved you on. A sigh left your lips as the coven looked at your with expectance. Feeling like an idiot you stared back. An awkwardness in the air. Your thing? Right... your thing. Forcing your shoulder's to relax, you turned away from the coven and faced the road ahead. Closing your eyes, you stood for a moment before reopening them to discover a trail of.... bright green smoke? Agatha smirked like the devil when she noticed your eyes change from it's normal hue to a gentle golden. "You see it don't you?" She leaned in close and whispered. Then, without another word, you began to walk. Agatha and the boy by her side, Teen, wasted no time in following. The others lingered slightly behind but followed all the same. 

As you walked, you jumped as the woman at the back spoke out. Breaking your focus. "You know what this is?" You raised an eyebrow at her raised voice as you turned back to look at her. "This is a kidnapping, And I think it is about high time we involve the local authorities." She announced as she rummaged through her bag. A frown left your lips, confusion laced in your eyes. A kidnapping? Then it hit you. Your mouth became thin as you glanced to Agatha. She looked at you as if to say 'what?' before shrugging off your silent conversation. Not that it surprised you. It was Agatha after all. Yet, you felt a little bit of pity for the poor woman Agatha had tricked into coming. 

Jennifer, seeming having enough of holding her tongue, looked around in slight annoyance. "Are we gonna ignore the fact that something chased us down here?" You couldn't find it in yourself to disagree with her. She had a point. The Salem Seven weren't something to just be.. ignored. Sharing a subtle glance with Agatha, you hid your concern. You still remembered the time that your sister, brightest transformation witch that had ever dared to be, was once approached by them. She had barely escaped with her life. Alice turned her body weight to Agatha, gesturing to her as she corrected that they had chased Agatha. Mrs hart, who was messing with her phone, frowned and slightly panicked when she discovered there was no cell service.  

"Well, Whatever chased Agatha down here, it's our problem now." Lilia's tone was sombre with a slight hint of annoyance as she sent a side glance towards Agatha. You held your tongue as you continued to take the lead in the walk.  Debating whether or not you should say something about the Salem Seven and who- No, what they really were. You decided to keep walking. Following the path lay out before you. Zoning out, you didn't bother to listen to the present conversation. As you walked, you kept your eyes on the trees around you while the group continued to bicker amongst each other. Jennifer caught your ear as she was complaining about not knowing what the group was up against. You paused. She had a point. No one, besides maybe Agatha, had an idea on what you all intended on facing. Lilia, deep in thought, looked down for a moment. "Tame your fears." she said, her eyes dawning with realisation.  You looked back to her. "That's what we're up against." she frowned. "Our worst nightmares."

You felt yourself grow nervous. Our worst nightmares? Swallowing, you tried to hide your feelings and remain unnerved. Agatha seemed to catch on, however. blue eyes scanned your frame. Yet the older witch seemed to share your... feelings. Alice then asked Agatha what the trials were like. "The... road will test us." She began. "And our knowledge of the craft." Everyone seemed to share a look. A silent conversation. "One trial for each skill." Agatha finalised, studying the group. Jennifer looked absolutely appalled as she questioned how they were to pass with no magic. You frowned and gave a side ways glance to Agatha. 

Teen, who seemed to be ever full surprises, stepped forward. There was a wide grin on his face as he spoke. "Well, there's always analog magic. You know, labour-intensive, manual acts of magic." He said like it was obvious. "Witchcraft!" he practically sang once her realised he had lost the group. "Emphases on the 'craft'." He forced a smile. Jennifer then asked the question that had been scratching your head since you met the boy. Who was he? "I'm-" Silence. You noticed the Sigil run across the boys mouth after he spoke. 

Your eyes narrowed. How... Unusual. "Well, Ill be." Lilia smirked. "Someone's put a sigil on that boy." Then everyone, yourself included, looked to Agatha. You knew her well. It wasn't unlike her to do something like this. But the looks from the group only made her scoff. 

"Don't look at me. I didn't put that clumsy glamour on him." She shrugged. "Sigils are beneath me."

As Teen looked confused, he asked what a sigil was. You were done observing the group and decided to let your own mouth loose. "A sigil is a type of spell, yes." You forced a smile to the boy. "In your case, the sigil appears to be a redaction spell." You began, adjusting your glasses. "Which means to... remove words or information." Your explanation was rather simple. "So... for better or for worse, you are hidden from witch folk. it's rather interesting." You summarised. "the only question is... why?" You hummed, your clawed nails drumming against your arm. 

 Jennifer watched you as you finished. "Looks like Agatha brought a sparkly little mystery with her." She sassed, ignoring Agatha's slight glare of annoyance. 

"She was probably trying to keep him all to herself." Lilia hummed, with slight false amusement in her tone.

Agatha pulled Teen behind her as he asked why someone would want to hide him. But the question went unanswered. "Look," Agatha began, looking toward the group. "I have no idea what's under that sigil. He could be something special or he could be a pest that some cranky witch stashed under a rock. We can crack him open later." you smirked slightly, only slightly, at her words. "The real value lies at the end of the road." She smiled. she then gestured to Jennifer. "So, if you want to unbind," you noticed the potions witch take in a breath. "And you want to reverse your fortune" Agatha went on to Lilia as the older woman looked slightly uncomfortable. "And you," She continued to Alice. "Want to find out what happened to mummy. And you...." Agatha paused. Mrs hart was gone? Agatha scoffed, unamused. "I mean, you take your eyes off of her for two seconds..." She rolled her eyes. 

You looked around. Scanning the area for the woman. "Can't you just sniff her out." Jennifer asked as she turned to you. Looking down at you like you were dirt beneath her feet. "That's the whole reason you're here, right?" she spat out as if blaming you for the situation. 

Staring gob-smacked, you glared. The gold in your eyes becoming more prominent "Do I look like a blood hound to you, potions witch?" you hissed. "I'm your guide. I am not some glorified baby sitter."  Just then, there was a scream.  You looked up towards the sound then to the path. At least she went the right way. "This way." You urged the group. Alice was hot on your tail as you followed the path. Speeding ahead of you, Alice got to Mrs Hart just in the nick of time. The poor woman was nearly earth food. Sinking deep into the mud. Teen went to help as Alice pulled her out of the sinking mud. You stared for a moment. Well, that.. could have gone worse. 

Mrs Hart attempted to wipe the mud off but it was mostly unsuccessful. Not that you were surprised. "You can't just walk off the road like that." Alice scolded lightly at the older woman. The older woman in her shock complained about it being a horrible party and you felt your lips form a tight line. Glaring at Agatha out of the corner of your eye. 

Agatha sighed and tried to keep a level head. "Well, I thought this was pretty obvious." She hummed. "But for the uninitiated, rule number one - Do not step off the road." Agatha announced clearly. "So if we just follow the instructions of the balled, We'll be as safe as kittens." She smiled widely and winked at you. You rolled your eyes. "Okay?" she smiled but Mrs Hart, and understandably so, was slightly upset with the whole affair. You noticed Jennifer walk off slightly and kept your eyes on her. She called everyone to look. There was something different about her voice. Something light.... hopeful. Following her gaze, you noticed a large beach house. Where-? You found yourself taken back. How did such a thing... just appear? 

Taking Agatha's lead, you followed the older witch onwards. The change of ground made you shiver slightly. sand had never been your favourite thing to walk in. especially when it got in between your toes. Staring in wonder, the group approached the door. Lilia traced the markings on the door and you caught yourself accidently staring at her hands. You cleared your throat and looked away, ignoring your slightly flustered face. "The phases of the moon." Lilia's words hung through the air. 

Teen looked in interest. "Its full... the water phase." he smiled brightly. Lilia looked at him, her brown eyes bore how impressed she was with his comment. It only made him smile wider. "So... what do we do?" He asked curiously. Mrs hart went ahead and rung the doorbell, claiming that we didn't want to surprise anyone. But that was short lived as Agatha just opened the door anyways. 

Once inside, you were caught off guard. You looked down to your clothing. Your red tartan coat was gone and was replaced with something... plainer. A grey blazer hugged your form. The black trousers you were wearing were tight and the t-shirt match with silver markings. The heels were grey and matched the blazer. You hair was loose and you ran your clawed fingers through it. It was new... You noticed Lilia looked noticeably different. Her tight curls were gone and she was dressed in mostly white.  She was wearing a silk scarf though. Having a look around, everyone took in the new surroundings. It was a fancy place. You looked to a few of the paintings and tilted your head. Just then, Mrs Hart exclaimed her love for the kitchen. Scaring everyone in the process. You took in some deep breaths. Trying to relax yourself. This was fine. It was calm. 

Teen then called from the dining area of the house. It didn't take long for the group to gather into the room like a bunch of rushing hens. "What is this?" Agatha asked as she snatched the card from his hands. "A wedding? Please God, not a baby shower." She groaned before Jennifer snatched it from her. Frustrated, Agatha threw her hands up. Wondering where she got the audacity. 

"The witches' road cordially invites you to the first trail." The potions witch read clearly before flipping the card over. Her eyes lighting in wonder. "It's a riddle." She spoke softly before beginning to read the riddle. "My age has value. I'm no fun alone. I mess with your mind, my tricks are well known." She then looked to the group. You were no luck in riddles, unfortunately. Your sister used to be so good at them. She could've made the mighty sphinx run for her money. Jennifer then passed the card on to Mrs Hart. You smiled softly when the woman examined the card. 

"What does it mean?" Teen asked, curious.

"That it's really expensive." Mrs hart hummed out. There was something in the way she said it that made you laugh. Agatha's eyes were immediately drawn to your face when the laugh left your lips. It had been years... beyond years since she had heard that sound come from you. It made her a little relieved that after all this time you still had that same humour about you. Even if was buried deep deep within you. 

Alice, who now held the card, repeated it's contents. "It sounds like a witch." Agatha said as she rolled her fingers. Jennifer made a snarky comment about it sounding like Agatha and Agatha paid in due by mimicking the potions witch.

Mrs hart, who had turned around, sang the word wine and Alice's eyes lit up. "That's it, ten points for Mrs Hart." She smiled. Turning around too, you saw the wine on the dining table. Accompanied by six glasses. Immediately, you didn't trust the liquid and it would seem you weren't alone on that train of thought. "Wait, we don't know what will happen if we drink it." Alice said, worried, as Mrs Hart grabbed the wine bottle. It made the blonde woman hesitate and she went to set down the bottle. 

Agatha looked to Alice. "Oh, sure we do. Something terrible." She said with a straight face. "But if we don't follow these obvious breadcrumbs, we cant move forward and we wont get to the big prize." Everyone shared a nervous and unsure look. "So, does anybody have a cork screw?" She asked and grabbed the wine bottle herself. Teen offered to go get one from the built in bar and Jennifer accompanied him. When they returned, you noticed a slight change in the boy. You adjusted your glasses wondering what had gone on between the two. Once the bottle was opened, Agatha poured everyone a glass. You stared at the glass. Unsure whether you really wanted to drink it or not. "If you're waiting for a charcuterie, I don't think its coming." she smiled widely. With that, Mrs hart wasted no time getting the red liquid down her. You stared at her as she chugged it down before telling everyone not to judge her. 

Just then, the timer beeped. Thirty minutes. You swallowed as Agatha raised her glass. You copied and the group followed suit. Toasting. After clinking your glasses together, teen approached and asked if he could have some. An echo of 'No's filled the room. "Should we take the girl talk to the sofa?" Mrs Hart asked. You all followed suit. There was tension in the air. Swishing the liquid in your glass, you frowned. It didn't smell right. But then again, what type of alcohol ever did smell lovely? Ignoring your instincts, you took a sip. Agatha sat down beside you as Mrs Hart began to talk. You noticed her wine glass was not in sight but decided not to question it. "Okay. So, a witch is really just another name for a bad girl? Is that right?" She asked and for a moment, you smiled gently. 

"That is extremely reductive." Lilia began, her legs crossed on the arm chair. she sat like a queen. "We are not a Monolith." She hummed. "And, you know, I blame Halloween. Do you see any pointy hats in here? any green skin? any brooms? No, sir." She ranted before taking a sip. You smiled. A genuine smile. You took the second to admire her. Agatha eyed you, a look in her eyes told you that wheels in her head were turning. You decided not to look in her direction. Agatha didn't back down, giving you a knowing look. 

Mrs hart stood and walked off slightly. "Well I am not saying that I wanna join the club or anything, but I would drink the blood of a virgin if it would smooth out some of these wrinkles." Mrs Hart said as she wondered. When she turned back to face the group, a sharp gasp left your lips. Staring like you had been slapped, you looked over the blonde's face. It was swollen. A mummer of 'oh my god's uttered through the room. "Oh, you are so sweet." Mrs Hart gushed. "I don't really think I need it either." She laughed, seemingly oblivious to what had happened. Alice tried to gently approach Mrs Hart, or rather Sharon as she called herself, about the swelling. "Is it bad?" She asked lowly. Bad!? It was horrendous! 

A light glare graced your face when you looked at Agatha as she said that Mrs hart looked fantastic. Jennifer stood up suddenly and looked beyond terrified. "We've been poisoned." she said in a panic. You felt yourself crumble. Everyone ran to a mirror. You traced over your skin. No no no... no way. You looked like a grape. You hated how swollen you looked. Like too much Botox gone wrong. "Mrs Hart, you are so pretty." Jennifer forced out to Mrs Hart. "But since you were the first one to drink, you're our canary in the coal mine." Jennifer explained. However, Mrs Hart took another sip of the wine in her panic. 

"Oh for crying out loud, she's lost her wits." you groaned as teen snatched the glass off of her. Reminding her it was poisoned. 

Agatha, who was on the other side of the room, shouted across. "Why don't we just let her drink it all!" The group looked at Agatha with slight disgust. "uh.." You tilted your head as she began to fiddle with her hair. "It just... serves our best interest is all." she said trying to keep her hair out of her face. 

Jennifer went back to questioning Mrs hart about the symptoms. You watched nervously but your attention was soon drawn to Lilia. She looked dazed out. "I love you guys." Your eyes widened slightly. What? Your lips became thin as you watched the older witch. Unsure where that had just come from. But then you noticed how her eyes began to adjust once more. As if they were coming back to the present reality. "What?" She asked when she noticed everyone was staring at her like she had three heads. Did she not remember what she said? Just then, Mrs hart said that she felt better. Immediately, you went to check your face. It was seemingly back to normal. You sighed, relieved.

However, Jennifer was quick to burst your bubble. "Not yay... very much not yay..." She said into herself, thinking. "The fact that the face swelling decreased so quickly mean it can only be one time of poison." You felt your palms grow sweaty. this was bad. this was very bad. "Alewife's revenge." She spoke, the concern clear in her voice. "Face Swelling is just the beginning. Next is dizziness, delirium, loss of motor function." You shared a nervous glance with Agatha. A silent conversation of panic. "Also hallucinations and eventually..." She hesitated. "Death." 

The blue eyed witch wasn't having it. You noticed a change in Agatha's eyes. A change you had seen too many times. "Agatha." You scowled, slightly nervous as the older woman raced over to the window. "Agatha, wait!" You panicked. Agatha picked up an onement and began to bash it against the window. You rapidly approached the older witch as the group yelled at Agatha. "Stop it!" You hissed and tried to claw the object out of her hands but her desperate grip was tight. During your tug of war, Alice grabbed Agatha from behind and pulled her away. 

With Alice's aid, you yanked the object off the older witch's hands. Ignoring her yell.... roar? of frustration. You held the object close to your chest. Keeping it far from Agatha. Jennifer told Agatha that she couldn't run from the poison. Then, Teen held a full wine glass. You stared at it then to Agatha. "She didn't drink the poison... " The boy said as he approached slowly. "You can't cheat, Agatha." He frowned. 

"Why?! who says!?" Agatha demanded. You scoffed. Nothing had changed. You were a fool for thinking other wise. God, you were an utter idiot for doing this. 

"The road." Lilia said, her voice strong, clearly frustrated with Agatha. 

Agatha rolled her eyes and scoffed. "Oh that's ridiculous!" She hissed at Lilia. You scoffed. No, her behaviour was ridiculous.  "We don't all have to suffer!" You felt yourself lose a few braincells. How, after all this time, was she still acting like a child throwing a tantrum. "Teen didn't drink!" Agatha argued. You rolled your eyes.

Jennifer was quick to argue back. "He's not in the coven and he's underage." She gestured to teen. It was clear everyone in the room was seething with  anger. 

"I'm gonna shove it down your gullet, so help me-" Lilia snapped.

Agatha snatched the glass out of Teen's hand. "Oh, you know what!" She grunted and threw the glass to the floor with a force. Smashing it. The red liquid stained the white sofa and carpet. Well, well done Agatha. Jennifer yelled as it it the ground. Alice told Agatha that she had to drink but the older witch was having none of it. "Well, I would but there's no more wine." She smirked at them. "So?" She shrugged. The noticed your disapproving look. Alice picked up her own wine glass and and stared at it. Just then the empty glass began to fill out of of nothing. Red liquid filling half way. As Alice held the glass out for Agatha, the brunette twitched. Clearly uncomfortable. "So cute." She muttered. Teen stepped forward. He held eye-contact with Agatha his eyes stern as he told her to drink. He scoffed then threated to drink it himself. "No!" Agatha yelled then grabbed him back. You watched interested by the desperate changed in Agatha. 

Agatha scoffed as she took the drink, she forced it to her lips and drank. Twitching as she did. Once she finished, she held back a cough. Agatha muttered something about it being so cheap. Just then, You turned to face Mrs Hart as she began to mutter pleas to herself and someone called Wanda. You stared, Utterly confused. "Oh, god." You gasp when she fell. Alice caught the woman and sit her on the sofa. 

"Hey, Potions witch." Agatha called, her face now as bloated as yours was a few moments ago. "it's time to brew an antidote." Agatha hummed. You kept your eyes on the older witch. This was going to be interesting. 

--I_I<-)0(->I_I--

"All right," Jennifer began as she set the timer on the counter. The kitchen lights were dimmed. "Let's see what we're working with here." she said, deep in thought. "I need frankincense and the gut of a eusocial insect." She hummed as she thought about the ingredients. Alice and teen took off quickly to find the frankincense and honey. She then looked between Agatha, you and Lilia. You stared at her, waiting for her next few ingredients. "I need a corpse that's been decaying for at least 30 million years." Your eyes widened. A what? Where would one even require that!?

Agatha seemed to share your train of thought as she threw her hands in the air. "Oh, is that just something that's available cause I don't know what you're talking about!" She exclaimed as she looked Jennifer up and down. 

You looked between the two. The tension was insufferable. "Why do I have to translate?" She asked, frustrated. "It's zooplankton. It's in petroleum products." she explained and looked to Lilia for support. 

Lilia nodded, taking the potion witch's words into account. Agatha took your arm as she looked to the Divination witch. "Lilia, come on." Agatha urged the older woman who was already walking at a fast pace. "After you. Let's go. Andale!" Agatha rushed out as she kept you by her side. Chasing after Lilia. As you walked by Agatha's side, you paused.

"Minerva." A voice hissed through the air. Ghosting across your skin. Making the hairs the back of your neck stand up. You knew that voice better then anyone else. "Minerva." The voice called out again. You stilled, staring wide-eyed. Agatha shook your arm, causing you to look at her. She was... speaking? yelling? yet you could not hear. Her face was smothered in concern. "Minerva." Your head snapped in the direction of soft voice. When you turned to look back for Agatha, she wasn't there. You swallowed thickly and adjusted your glasses. Nerves running through you. The voice called your name again. You licked your unusually dry lips and with a deep breath, you took a step toward the voice. Michelle's voice.

With each step you took, the walls seemed to... grow smaller. Placing your hand against the wall in attempt to steady yourself, you noticed how it changed from lavished wallpaper to dark hard wood. At the end of the corridor stood a door. You tilted your head. It looked familiar. Reaching for the handle, you hesitated. Closing your eyes, you opened the door. A gasp left you as fresh air entered your lungs. "Your late, lass." Your sister glared gently. Her accent was as thick as you remembered. You stared wide eyed, shrinking slightly under her green gaze. Tearing up, You looked upon your sister slim form. You suddenly felt much smaller. "Come now, it won't be long till Agatha comes back." She scowled. "If only Ma could see you now." She shook her head and turned her back on you while she continued to clean. 

Deciding to approach with caution, you called for her but she didn't seem to hear you. "I didn't ask for any of this, you know." She scowled. "Don't you think I wanted a normal childhood? Instead.... of taken care of you. I never wanted to leave home. To leave home for this... clatty country! But Da found out. And what was I to do, Minerva? Ma had already been put to death by the local church." She hissed under her breath, the weight and build up of all her hidden thought coming to surface. You took a step back. You felt like a silly little girl all over again. You hadn't even felt the tears run down your cheeks until you touched your cheek. "I gave you everything and what did I get? I worked.... And I worked. I suffered!" She cried out. 

You could take it anymore, you reached for your sister. "Michelle... stop it..." You whispered and tried to touch your sister. "Please, I'd never... I'm sorry, Michelle." She turned to face you, causing you to stumble back slightly. She... her skin... gods. You couldn't look. It was rotting. Your sister's once perfect and pristine face was crumbling, cracking and collapsing. 

"I should have let father killed you then... Had I known.... " She sobbed, screaming. Your heart was racing. Michelle's skin was decaying. Worm eaten. "Look at me! Look at what you caused!" She screamed, spitting at you in the process. She grabbed both your arms and shook you. "I should've let Da throw you in the loch!" You sobbed. Her words hitting a cord within you. 

Michelle continued to shake you. You closed your eyes. Why wouldn't it just stop! "Minerva!" Agatha's voice rang through your head. You eyes snapped open. Where Michelle had once been, Agatha was now in her place. "Snap out of it!" She hissed as she continued to shake you. You sobbed and launched yourself into her arms. 

Agatha froze as you sobbed into her neck. "Aggie..." You cried. "Michelle... she..." You didn't dare to continue. Agatha was frozen for a moment before she stroked your hair and sighed. Nodding to herself. You calmed down quickly, suddenly feeling very embarrassed and vulnerable. You noticed Lilia's eyes were stuck on your form. Concern laced into those soft eyes. You cleared your throat and pulled away from Agatha.  Your cheek's darkened as an awkward tension was left in the air. "Let's just continue, shall we?" You whispered and hugged yourself in an effort to keep yourself steady. Lilia nodded to herself and led the way. Agatha stared at you for a moment but you shook her off. Not wanting any questions. 

Making your way to the garage, Agatha turned on the light. You panicked. There was no car. Lilia's lips became thin as her brows furrowed. "No car. No Gas." She frowned in worry.

You looked between the two. "What else had petroleum in it?" You asked, confused. 

Agatha thought for a moment before running off with the word 'Jelly' leaving her lips. Finding yourself with no other choice, You shared a quick look with Lillia before following Agatha. Agatha led you both to a bathroom area. On the shelves was full of Jennifer's skin care. You raised an eyebrow. Really? "Ugh." Agatha groaned. "Of course, Jen's skin care made it to the road." She complained as she looked over the products. 

Lilia looked confused as she held one of the tubs. "But it's all... organic. There's no petroleum in there?" she said as she eyed the product. Agatha shrugged and said about calling her bluff. You nodded to yourself and began to pick up some of the products. "Try to save Agatha." You were taken back at Lilia's sudden words. What did she mean? It was quite similar to how she reacted earlier on. The same dazed out eyes.

You blinked a few times. It felt like a staring test between the three of you. No one knowing what exactly to say. "um... Yes, I love this plan but.. I just think we should find the ingredients first." Agatha forced an awkward smile. You eyed them as Lilia slowly turned her back and picked up a few products. Once you had gathered some, You all went back through the halls. Trying to reach the kitchen.

 As you walked, you noticed that Lilia was no longer behind the two of you. "Agatha..." You paused and she looked behind her to look at you. She looked at you expectantly. "Lilia's gone. We can't just leave her."  You said like it was obvious as you eyed the corridor for the older witch. 

"Can't we?" Agatha snarked with a smirk. However, when she saw your glare she frowned and shrugged. "You're no longer any fun, Mins."

You ignored her and retraced your steps. As you did, you felt a body clash with yours. Lilia yelped in surprise. You steadied her for a moment, Your eyes wide with worry. But she only pulled away from you and landed with her back against the wall. Trying to get away. Her chest was rising up and down. Whatever she had seen had clearly scared her. She looked like an injured animal and you didn't dare approach. When she spoke, it wasn't in English. It was foreign something you hadn't heard before. She closed her eyes. You shared a glance with Agatha. Even she looked concerned for the older witch, surprise in her eyes. When you looked back at Lilia you saw the utter pain in her eyes. She was still not looking the two of you. Perhaps expecting to be mocked. 

For a while there was only silence. You let her calm down a little on her own. As you did, Her eyes slowly turned to look at you and Agatha. Both of you stood unmoving. Faces soft with gentle silent comfort. "Lilia..." You whispered softly. "It's okay..." You hummed and took a little step forward towards her. Her breathing was still uneven but you didn't dare push the woman. She swallowed and closed her eyes for another moment. When she was calm again, she looked to you and nodded. Agatha wasted no time in the leading the two of you back. You lingered behind a bit to keep an eye on Lilia. 

Returning to the living room, you suddenly felt very loose. Agatha wasted no time in announcing that You three had successfully gotten the ingredients. "What's next!" Agatha barked. But as she did glass cracked. You tensed as looked towards the large windows. Agatha stepped forwards, her eyes narrowed as she tried to make out the cause. "What.. is that?" She asked and very slowly approached. Following her lead, your eyes widened as you got closer. Lilia wasted no time in staying by your side. Her expression mirroring your own. Your head was reeling as you came to terms with what you saw. The house appeared to be deep under water. 

The water was leaking into the room through the crack. The crack Agatha had made earlier. Jennifer confirmed it was salt water. Alice glanced at the group momentarily. "How long is that going to hold." she asked with a slight twinge of fear to her voice. 

You tensed. "I'd rather not find out." You hummed and glanced to the protection witch. 

"No, thank you." Agatha rushed. The group, bar Lilia, ran to lift Mrs Hart. You held the woman's upper body, careful with her head. As you carried her into the kitchen, Agatha looked to Lilia. "Move those pears out of the way." She said like an order as you approached the table. Lilia nodded and acted quickly, rushing to move the decorative pears out of the way. Setting the woman on the table, Alice glanced your way. Seemingly thankful for your aid. 

As you gathered around the sink, Jennifer took lead. "The elements need to be added in a certain order in a specific time." She clarified, You felt hot. Really hot. Like the sun had blasted you with it's flames. Your breathing became heavier. You noticed that Lilia, who stood beside you, seemed to be in a similar state. "Starting with gut and eye." Jennifer said as she dumped the ingredients in. Alice tried to aid Jennifer but the other woman waved her off. "No, no, no, no, get out of here." She quickly said. She then looked to Agatha. "Where's the zooplankton?" She asked.

Lilia wobbled slightly, loosing her balance before she fully leaned on the table. Agatha, in her poisoned state, smirked. "All natural or not, Jen?" You glanced to Agatha as she teased her while waving the skin care products. Jennifer looked conflicted for a short moment before telling Agatha to throw it in. "Knew it." Agatha said smugly as she and Lilia dumped the skin care into the sink. Lilia, who seemed to be completely... out of it, leaned against you when she looked her balance once more. You tensed but did not remove her. Alice struggled with the frankincense, so much so that she could not open the small tub. Just as Jen was Complaining about it, Teen offered his help. Then, after a few seconds, the water began to turn a shade of pink. "Its... working? it working, right?" Agatha asked desperately.

"What? What's wrong?" Lilia questioned, her brows furrowed. Her eyes full of uncertainty and fear.

"Any bright ideas on how to set this thing to boil?" Jen frowned nervously. 

Agatha freaked. "You didn't think of this before!?" She snapped at the potions witch. 

You stared wide eyed. Was Jennifer serious? "While I was in the middle of a traumatic hallucination?" Jen glared Agatha down. "No, Agatha, I did not." Hissed the tall woman.

For a moment, you found yourself twitching. Your jaw clenched and you stood to your full height. "We all had traumatic hallucinations." You gritted. Lilia glanced to you. Most of this time you had been quiet. She couldn't help but wonder what went on in your mind. So closed off, yet there were hints.. moments of vulnerably... frustration. 

Teen, in an attempt to stop the tension, put himself forward. "Uh, is there a sous vide?" He asked as he began to rummage in the cupboards. Agatha cringed as she asked Lilia what it was. But Lilia looked just as lost. "It's a super fancy cooking tool. it heats water to a specific temperature so that you can cook your meat evenly." He explained as he found the object. Plugging it in the sink. "My dad loves his." He smiled briefly. 

Jennifer called his name as she struggled. Now losing control of her body Like Lilia had. Teen grabbed the wooden spoon before returning to the sink. Waiting for Jennifer's instruction. "I need you to stir with your right dominant hand, counter clock wise." She said, out of breath while she came to his side. Hovering near the sink to keep an eye on him. Teen looked clueless and Jennifer raised an eyebrow. "To the left." She elaborated and he took in her words while stirring. "Everyone, pull a strand of hair out of your head now." She hummed. "A single hair only!" She hummed. 

You winced as you yanked a strand out of your head. You were waiting for the next instruction from Jennifer when you noticed Agatha's change in demeanour. You called her name but she didn't seem to hear. Frowning you called again as she began to walk away. Jennifer shared a look with Alice. Suddenly, Agatha was kneeling her back turned to you. With a gasp, she sobbed and fell back on herself. Her hand covering her mouth. It looked as if she were trying to get away from something. You stared at the older witch. Worried beyond measure. "Agatha!" Jennifer snapped, drawing Agatha out of her vision. Agatha scrambled to stand up. She looked around her. Terrified. "Agatha, we need your hair." Agatha approached and yanked a strand out of her head. "Now." Jennifer told the group. You dropped your hair into the sink, watching as the others did the same. "Stop stirring." Teen stilled. "We need to clasp hands and clear your minds." You took Lilia's hand in one and Teen's in the other. Lilia was shaking. "Once our intentions our aligned, it will glow a bright cerulean." She said.

You closed your eyes and tried to focus. Shouldn't be too hard... right? "Wait, what our intentions again?" Agatha asked cringing hard, still taken back by her vision. 

"To not die." Jennifer forced out. 

Keeping your eyes close for a few moments. You tried to think of how nice it would be not to drop dead in a few minutes. You opened your eyes when you heard Alice speak. "I get cerulean and chartreuse confused..." She admitted sheepishly. "Is cerulean the green one?" Teen shook his head with a frown. Correcting her by telling her it was blue. "Then it's not working." Your body tensed. Great. this was how you died?! Absolutely fabulous. Teen panicked slightly and tried to explain it was like... a teal. You felt your heart jump in your chest. This was a disaster.

Lilia's hold on your hand tightened. You weren't too sure she realised she was still holding it. "It's green, teen!" she exclaimed.

"We only have a minute left! What have you forgotten?" You demanded, staring daggers at Jennifer. Your eyes held the fear lingering all over your body. 

Her eyes mirrored your own. "I Don't know!" She cried. "I've never made this potion before!" You felt the heat rising. You took off your blazer and through it to the side. "I make retinol serums for Christ's sake!" She hissed. "There was once a time where I would be able to solve this a wave of my hand, but now? I'm bound!" She shouted, the panic and built up energy finally getting to her. "He stole my magic! We're all gonna die here! I do not want to die here!" Jennifer hissed and took a step back. "This is not where I die!" she yelled, as her breathing became even more uneven. 

Agatha grabbed her by the shoulders in attempt to get through to her in some way. "I have always hated you." She admitted, keeping her grip tight on Jennifer's arms. "But I left you alone because what you were doing was important." She continued, the honesty dripping from her tongue. "Not this kale care crap. the real work. you can be that witch again. they can take your power, Jen, but they cant take your knowledge." Agatha finished. You stared at the interaction. Jennifer remained unresponsive for a moment. As if she wasn't fully processing Agatha's words or the meaning behind them. "Jen?" Agatha urged. 

"Blood." 

Smirking, Agatha's eyes filled with glee when Jennifer gave her an answer. "Who's and how much?" she questioned. When Jennifer mentioned the blood of the unpoisoned the weight of the room shifted. Agatha side glanced towards teen and you didn't know what to think.  The boy swallowed nervously as Agatha went towards the knives. Grabbing one she stormed over to Teen and grabbed his hand. "Thanks for being underage." She said as she sliced his hand open, ignoring the short protests from Lilia.

Then, with the blood in the sink, the potion colour began to change. Bubbling like wild as it did. You grinned like the Cheshire cat as it settled into a bright blue colour. Perfect. With Jennifer's okay, You wasted no time in getting yourself some of the antidote. Chugging it down, You winced as it attacked your throat. The taste leaving a surprisingly bitter after affect as it scratched down your throat. However, once it hit your depths, you relaxed. Sharing a look with the group. You laughed in relief as you felt yourself return to normal. The victory was short lived. Jennifer noticed the timer was still ticking. "Mrs Hart!" Alice realised. In a flash, a small bit of Anti-dote was passed down the line to Alice as she carefully forced the liquid down Mrs Hart. 

"DUMP IT IN HER MOUTH!" Agatha yelled desperately, hints of frustration in her tone. BEEP. BEEP. BEEP. BEEP. Your head snapped in the direction of the timer beeping. "Did it work?" Agatha asked. Suddenly the oven door slammed open. Jumping, you stared at the open door. Clearly that was your way out of this hell hole of a trial. Slowly approaching, you stayed a little behind Lilia as she lowered herself to look in.

Lilia's face became a scowl. "I am NOT climbing in an oven." she grumped slightly. You raised an eyebrow at her out right denial. "That happened to a friend of mine once," She stood straight to look at the group. "She had a lovely house too, and she ended up-" Lilia was interrupted by the crashing of waves. The glass from the windows had smashed right through. You stared at the water, completely gobsmacked. No. You hated water! Lilia and the others screamed. Jennifer was not taking any chances as the water slowly began to fill the kitchen. She was quick to harshly push Lilia out of the way, sending her stumbling backwards, toward you. Luckily enough, you caught her without fault. You glared daggers towards Jennifer as she slid down the oven and disappeared. You guided Lilia towards the oven, despite her resistance. She out right refused. "Nope! NO!" She cried out. 

You bit the inside of your cheeks and your lips became thin. "If we stay, we'll be worse off!" You yelled over the overwhelming noise from the water. "I promise it'll be okay but we need to go now!" You urged her forwards. She stared at you, horror woven into her gaze. She looked back at the sea water filling the room then bit her lip. Braving it, she knelt and climbed into the oven. Once she was in, You turned to look for Agatha. You wouldn't leave her. Lilia stared at you, waiting for you to join her. Walking through the water, carrying Mrs Hart, was Alice, Agatha and teen. You moved out of their way so they could put her in the oven. 

"Just shove her in there! just shove her! Shove her in there!" Agatha yapped. Lilia helped take Mrs Hart before hesitantly sliding down with a terrified scream. Alice told teen to go and he did. Agatha rolled her eyes and shoved you forward after Teen had slid down. Forcing you to go after the teenager. You didn't dare protest and followed suit. As you slid down, a scream echoed through the tunnel. Agatha cringed when she saw more and more water flooding the kitchen. she pushed herself in front of Alice. "ME NEXT!" she yelled and slid down after you. 

At the end of the... tunnel slide? You yelped as you bumped into Teen. Having domino effect on the ones in front. You groaned and coughed out. "Bloody gods above..." You muttered. However, Your peaceful moment it didn't last long as Agatha came sliding down at full speed, tumbling as she did, hitting you in the back. You hissed out in pain but the older witch didn't seem to care. Out of the corner of your eye you noticed that Lilia seemed... alight. Agatha stood and pushed past you, you rolled your eyes as you watched her struggle to get through the tangled bodies. In her effort to get out of the mess, She pushed teen and Lilia to the side. You sighed. Typical. When Agatha passed Jennifer she kicked her rather hard. But what else were you really expecting?

Taking in a deep breath, you stood fully and gave yourself a once over. You were drenched like a wet dog. Lilia leaned against the wall as she tried to come to terms with what just happened. The near death experience hitting her deep. You took off your red tartan coat. The bloody thing was dripping with water. Agatha flicked some hair out of her face. "A little rusty there, Jen?" She snarked as she eyed the potions witch. 

Jennifer glared at the blue eyed witch. "A little traitorous there, Agatha?" Jennifer sassed back. 

You held back a bitter smirk and lowered your head. Before the two could continue to bicker Lilia hushed them. "Stop." She looked them up and down. "We're alive..." Her tone dropped... she was relieved... shocked... "We made it through the first test." Lilia turned to scan the group. Her eyes scanning for your face. "Everyone is safe." She nodded to herself when she saw you staring at her. 

Teen voice interrupted the still moment. "Not everyone." He corrected, sorrow in his tone. "Sharon's dead." He closed the blonde woman's eyes. You stepped a little closer, your breath caught in your throat. 

Agatha glanced around the group. "Who's Sharon?" She asked, confused. You felt yourself shrink at the older witch's words. Your hand came to your face. Oh god. 

--I_I<-)0(->I_I--

Pacing in your other form, the wheels in your head were turning. Alice had suggested taking a break for a while... to adjust to recent advents. You had found a round patch for the group to rest for now. The leaves felt soft... almost pleasant under your small paws. As you paced, Your pointed ears flicked in the direction of the group. You couldn't believe that a woman was dead already. How? She drank the antidote, didn't she? Walking away from the group, you decided you needed some time alone. Properly alone. However, You didn't dare stray too far from them. To your surprise, it would seem your thought of privacy was shared. There, a short distance away, on a fallen log sat Lilia. She seemed deep in thought. You debated whether to approach or not. But with one first step, your mind was made up. 

Approaching slowly, you waited for her to noticed you. With luck, she did. If she was surprised she didn't show it. The older witch simply stared at you, blinking occasionally. With a few more steps, You slowly transformed back into your original state. You frown and adjust your glasses. "May I sit?" You asked and gestured to the spot next to her. The older witch thought for a moment then nodded with a small weak smile. It was thin and you would have missed it if you hadn't been looking at her properly. She looked... Beyond stressed. Her curly hair was slightly dishevelled. As you sat down, you sighed. The weight of the day laying heavy over the two of you. "You shouldn't stray to far from the group..." You whisper gently hoping she wouldn't take it the wrong way.

Lilia scoffed faintly but it only made you smirk. "I needed some time away." She admitted. You tilted your head when she said that. Your eyes softened. Of course, it was understandable why. The day had been... too much. You thought to your sister and frowned. "So... A tabby cat?" Lilia forced a smile trying to change the subject to something lighter. She didn't want to bring her problems onto you. You fondly shake your head as she spoke. "I had a friend once that was like you... a transformation witch, I mean. She could transform into a large grey wolf." Lilia's eyes became distant. Almost as if she were watching the memories right there and then. "She was a sweet woman despite it. She... was murdered during the trails. Saving my life actually. She lost control of it and... well, I'm sure you can guess the rest." She frowned, her fond memories turning sombre. You wondered what it must have been like. To live as long as Lilia had. To experience so much pain and loss. It would kill you. 

"It must have been hard." you whispered and moved a little closer to her in silent comfort. "I'm sorry for it." 

The older witch waved you off, not wanting your apologies. She'd rather hide that pain. "What I was trying to say was.. It must be nice to shed your skin and forget about.." Lilia hummed with a soft smile.  "Well, I'm sure you know what I mean." She whispered. "I always did like cats. It must be exciting to have an ability like yours." She continued, still deep in thought.

You laughed and her attention fully snapped to you as if she were confused on what exactly was so funny. "Yeah." You chuckled. "It's all fun and games until your throwing up hairballs early in the morning." A wide grin appeared on the older witch's face. She laughed of to the side slightly. As if embarrassed that she was laughing in the first placed. You joined her and for a moment. The air felt lighter. You relaxed slightly and noticed how her posture mirrored your own. Despite being on such a risk filled journey you felt safe. If only for a moment. Brown eyes met your green. You swallowed. The two of you continued to stare for a moment until Lilia seemed to remember herself and looked away, turning her gaze to the sky.

Lilia, nervous, Fiddled with her rings. "You trust Agatha." She brought up after the moment had gone. The fact hung in the air. You glance at her before looked at your clawed hands. Yeah, you trusted Agatha. Many would call you a fool for doing such a thing but... After everything that had happened. "Why is that?" The grey haired witch asked curiously. Her eyes running over you with a little suspicion. 

Taking a moment, you were quiet. Debating on what to say, you sighed. "Do you know the tales? Of my sister and I coming to America? The Smith sisters." You questioned. Lilia hesitated for a moment before nodding. She knew little of the tale and she doubted what she heard was accurate. "When Michelle and I fled from Scotland in 1710, I was only four. Our Ma had been killed a month before that. Michelle watched it happen. She saw our Ma strangled before they threw her into the flames." You clarified and continued to look a head, not wanting to face the older witch. "My sister was only sixteen. The only reason she had not married at thirteen was because she was rebellious and Da didn't want to give away an improper woman. She was scheduled to marry the priest's brother's Lad." you frowned. Lilia eyed you, Her eyed held an interest. In all honesty, this information wasn't entirely relevant but perhaps it gave some context. However, you were mainly telling it to talk about your sister. Her struggles deserved to be known. "But That never happened. After we fled, We spent four years traveling. Looking for a safe place to live. But with Michelle being a young woman with no money and an eight year old... Well, I'm sure you can imagine how hard things where." Your eyes became dark as you thought about it. You could still remember your sister being an utter mess as she would steal food and let herself starve so that she could feed you. 

"Over time, Michelle became desperate for some kind of salvation. She stole money off some... lord of England." you continued with your tone lowered. "She'd never tell me how she managed to pull off such a feat but I still remember the ugly red bruises on her neck. With that money she bought us ticket to America. To start fresh.  Took us two and a half months over sea but we made it. So many lower class had died on that ship. When we got there, we had stolen from the wrong pocket. Agatha's. She recognised the magic in us immediately. Well, more the magic in Michelle." Surprised laced in Lilia's deep brown eyes. The more she heard, The more she disliked. You held your coat closer. "I don't know how it all happened.. There was a connection between them, I guess. Michelle took to Agatha like a moth to the flame and before I knew it, our group of two became three." You smiled with hints of fondness. "Agatha would teach Michelle and help her with care of me and in return, Michelle would help with any tasks Agatha would need down. I'm positive there was more to their deal but I don't know what." You shrugged. Lilia looked conflicted as she heard about this.. side of Agatha. "I suppose, I trust Agatha because she was the one that aided us. Because she helped Michelle raise me. We probably would have died without her." You whispered, turning your gaze to Lilia. She looked... unsure. Her brows were furrowed and her eyes held a concern. Her lips were thin. You sighed. "I'm not saying you should trust her. But there's more to her then what meets the eye. If there wasn't. I wouldn't be here." You sighed.

Lilia shuffled a little closer. It was a small movement. One you would have missed if you weren't paying attention. "And where's Michelle now?" She questioned curiously. 

A bitterness played in your eyes as you turned to look at the sky. "Dead." The word left a thickness between you. "She went on a... mission some years ago with Agatha and... " You frowned when you remembered Rio. You cleared your throat. "Well, she never came home. Agatha won't talk about. At least not properly. Whatever happened on that day still haunts her." You finalised deep in thought as the older witch nodded along.

The curly haired woman eyed you with slight you worry. "Do you think that Agatha might have..." She paused. Eyeing your body language before deciding to go through with her words. "Drained her?" The words hit a nerve in you. 

It was a fair question. One you thought about everyday. It was the reason you stopped talking to Agatha and cut her off in the first place. Yet, you thought back to Agatha and Michelle's... friendship. Agatha would never mean to hurt Michelle. But what if they were in a situation where only one could make it out alive? You bit the inside of your cheeks. "Until it is proven that she did. I will remain by her side." You explained lightly. You sigh and stand. Taking in a deep breath. You turned back to look at the seated woman. "Come on, we shou-"

"Stop it!" you jumped slightly at Lilia's sudden change in demeanour. Your eyes went wide as you stared at the woman who was now looking very dazed. Tilting your head, you inched a little bit towards the older witch. She looked as if she couldn't even see you. Her eyes were so out of focus. 

Debating on how progress, you very gently called her name. "Lilia?" She didn't respond still in her.. lucid state. Cautious, you kneeled in front of her. You didn't want to scare how when she was in this state of mind. Being slow, you very carefully took her hand. "Lilia? Can you hear me? What do you see, Lilia?" The woman blinked rapidly when she heard your voice and felt your touch. Her brows furrowed and she looked to the spot beside her, where you had once been. The older woman looked confused on why you had suddenly 'teleported' spots. She looked down to your hand in hers. Her mind catching up with what happened. You gave a supportive smile and pull away. Leaving her hand slightly reaching for yours. "Come on, it's about high time we return to the others. Lilia nodded to herself and stood, brushing down as she did. 

The walk back was quiet, but not uncomfortable. As you returned to the group, Agatha watched you like a hawk. Her gaze questioning. You ignored it but that was short lived as the blue eyed witch approached you. "What was that about?" She hummed with her arms crossed. You said nothing and watched as Lilia said down on a rock near Jennifer and Alice. 

"Nothing... Nothing at all."

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

This one is such a long chapter I was soo worried about it being too long and boring, so hopefully you've found it enjoyable. Thank you so much for reading this chapter!

I really hope you guys like it so far and I really cannot wait to get into the next chapter and to show you all what is to come. This is currently my favourite project. Also did anyone else panic for nothing over this weeks episode cause I was shitting myself thinking it was going to be Lilia's trial. 😭 I'm terrified for next weeks

I would like to point out that I'm dyslexic so I'm sorry for any mistakes and I'm assuming there will be a good few in this chapter because of the length. Please let me know what you think! I'm always reading the comments and looking for your thoughts and taking them into account and they help a lot with motivation.

Lot's of love and I hope to see you in the next chapter! 💜

(Remember to continue to thank and praise Patti Lupone in our prayers)

[vivwritesfics]

Hungry Like The Wolf

Chapter Two

She hadn't seen her best friend, Lando, in years. She didn't run into him the last time she was visiting her father and she doubted she'd see him this time. Things were different now. She wasn't aware of his furry little problem. Just like she wasn't aware of the vampires plaguing the town.

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Vampire!Oscar x Reader x Werewolf!Lando

Series Masterlist

It came as no surprise that Jack didn't recognise his big sister. It was heart breaking, sure, and Toto wanted to do something about it.

"Jack really likes that cafe in town," he said as he sat on the end of his daughters bed. She had spent the previous evening rearranging her desk to better allow her to get on with work. "You could take him and get some work done at the same time," he suggested.

She gave a small nod. "Yeah, if Susie is okay with me taking him," she said.

"It was Susie's idea."

Before she knew it she was out of the house, holding Jack's hand with her laptop bag over her shoulder. She waved at her dad as she started down the driveway, heading further into the town.

That was until she collided with a firm chest. She let go of Jack to not drag him with her, as strong arms wrapped around her keeping her up. "You okay the- Y/N?"

She looked into the strangers lovely eyes, taking a moment before she recognised him. "Lando? Lando Norris?"

He once again wrapped his arms around her, this time in a friendly manner. But she pushed away from him, got a better look at him and felt his chest. Lando went slightly red at that, but he didn't pull away. "You've really grown," she said with a grin, once again reaching for Jack's hand.

"So have you, uhh..." he began. She didn't know that he had been watching over her from the moment she arrived, that he had orchestrated this meeting from the moment she arrived. But, now that he was here, he didn't know what to say.

"So, uh, Jack and I are heading to Renee's Cafe. Do you wanna come with?"

Renee's cafe. That was on the other side of town. The vampire side of town. Even if he wanted to, Lando couldn't go, not without breaking a multitude of laws. He shook his head. "I can't, but we could exchange phone numbers? That way we could plan to meet," he said.

"Love it," she called as she pulled her phone from her bag. She passed it over to Lando, letting him punch in his number before they went their separate ways.

Well, she thought they went their separate ways. She and Jack headed to the cafe, Lando retreated back down the road. He kept turning around though, waiting until she and Jack were out of sight. As soon as they were out of sight, he dove into the woods and followed her scent until he got to the vampire side of town.

There he paced, thick paws crushing the twigs on his path.

Holding Jack's hand, she walked him into the cafe. They sat at the very back, she left Jack there with her bag while she got them both something to eat and drink.

As soon as it had been ordered she sat back down opposite her half brother. Jack looked around the cafe, but he wouldn't look at her. She sucked in a breath and leaned back in her chair. "You have no idea who I am," she said, and Jack shook his head. "That's okay. I haven't been around very much. Their drinks were placed in front of them, along with pastries.

She tried to ask Jack as many questions as she could, but he wasn't very willing to answer. It was okay, though. She understood. She was nothing more than a stranger to him at that point.

"Wanna head home?" She asked him once they'd finished eating.

Jack nodded his head. He hopped out of his chair as she grabbed her bag and took him out of the cafe. "What're you gonna do when we get home?" She asked as she led him out of the cafe.

Jack shrugged his shoulders.

"Has dad taught you any German yet?"

He nodded his head. "Polish, too," he said and she gave him a small smile.

But she was too concentrated on her little brother. She wasn't looking where she was going as they wandered through the parking lot and smacked right into something.

Just like she had with Lando, she let go of Jack's hand as a pair of strong arms wrapped around her, holding her up. This time, when she looked up at the owner of the arms, she didn't recognise him.

His skin was pale and a few moles were dotted around on his face. His eyes were a lovely shade of brown and his hair fell over his forehead, parted down the middle. He was gorgeous, that was undeniable.

“I'm so sorry about that,” he said in an Australian accent, a polite smile on his face as he released his hold on her, his fingertips brushing against the exposed skin of her arm. He was cold to the touch.

She shook her head and readjusted her bag on her shoulder. “No, no,” she began. “It was my fault, I wasn't looking where I was going.”

The kind stranger kept staring at her. “Are you new in town? I haven't seen you before,” she said.

“Uh, yeah. Sort of,” she answered. “I'm here visiting my dad.”

Suddenly Jack was in front of her, waving up at the pale stranger. “Hi, Oscar,” he said.

Oscar. She looked at his face as the name played in her head. It suited him. He certainly looked like an Oscar. “Hey Jack,” he said as he mussed up his hair. “Who're you with today?”

“This is my sister,” he answered.

Oscar snapped his eyes towards her. “I didn't know Toto and Susie had a daughter,” he said.

“That's because they don't,” she answered, somewhat lightheartedly. “Toto is my dad, yeah, but Susie is my stepmother. I'm visiting for a few weeks.” She held her hand towards him. “I'm Y/N.”

He took her hand, skin so cold against her own it sent a shiver down her spine. “Oscar. It's nice to meet you.”

“It’s nice to meet you too,” she replied, finally letting go of his hand. She placed her hands on Jack's shoulders. “Well I’m gonna get this guy home. It really was nice to meet you, Oscar.”

He waved as she walked away, unable to look away from her. She had smelled so sweet, the fragrance overtaking Oscars senses. That was how he had bumped into her, because of her scent and the sound of her heart thumping in her chest. Desperately he wanted to chase after her, but he hung back, restraining himself.

Hie smell, the smell of vampire clung to her as she walked back to the werewolf side of town. Lando couldn't help but growl as the smells mixed together. He knew exactly which vampire she had come into contact with, as well.

Oscar. He was the vampire who loved to provoke Lando. He was the one who nearly had Lando breaking the treaty the vampires and the werewolves had created all those hundreds of years ago.

Oscar had touched his girl. And he was pissed about it.

Lando watched from the bushes as she and Jack entered the house. As soon as they were inside he turned away and ran back to his pack. He skillfully moved around the trees at the high speeds he was travelling to get back to them.

When he got there Daniel and Sergio were outside, wresting. It wasn't an uncommon sight to see two members of the back trying to push one another out of the circle. “DR,” Lando called and the two of them split apart.

Sweaty and out of breath, his tattoos on show, Daniel approached his much younger pack mate. He was the friendliest in the pack and had accidentally become friends with one of the vampires, Max.

“Talk to your boy for me,” he said, biting back a growl. “Tell him to tell the other blood suckers to stay away from the Wolff family.”

Daniel watched him for a minute. Lando was the youngest of all of them. He had little control over his emotions and Daniel could tell he was ready to burst. “Shirt off, jump in the ring with us,” he said,gesturing back to Checo.

Sucking in a breath, Lando did just that.

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[theanimeoftheblackbunnymask]

Shanks with a Female Marine S/O (Imagine)

Author's Note: I made a post mentioning this idea and it got a lot of attention. Hopefully it'll be talked about more down the road.

Links: {Masterlist}

When it comes to a marine reader, I can't picture them as this shy, weak little thing. I like to imagine reader as a well respected vice admiral, known for their heroism and determination.

I can see you meeting Shanks when he was a rookie. Just entered the grand line and is starting to get attention, but he isn't quite as big as he is now. You weren't new to the marines by the time you met Shanks, probably a captain, and it actually took a little bit for Shanks to truly see your potential.

You met him in some random bar him and his crew were drinking at. You were given orders to keep an eye on him, since the marines wanted to know just how much of a threat he was at the time. You decided fo go undercover while keeping a few lower ranked marines you were in charge of outside to keep post.

Shanks, being the flirt and charmer he is, immediately started conversation with you the moment you sat down next to him. You couldn't deny the fact he was friendly, offering to pay for your drink and even making you laugh a couple times, but you never once allowed yourself to be blinded by his antics. He was a pirate, and a possibility dangerous at best, you couldn't let yourself be blinded by his good looks and charm.

Despite Shanks being drunk when he first met you, he could see right through your duguise. The look in your eyes told him everything he need to know. However, he continued to act as if he was oblivious to that fact.

However, despite your better judgement, you ended up falling for his charm. The two of you ended up sleeping together in one of the island's many inns. You can't deny that he was probably the best fuck you've ever had, but the moral turmoil he threw in did not make it worth it.

You knew he was going to be trouble later down the road, and in all honesty, you wanted to see just how far he'd go, especially since the two of you were so close in age.

Not only did he leave an impression on you, but you left an impression on him. After meeting you, he was talking about you to Beckman.

"A beauty that woman was, Benn. A real beauty, a fierce one too," Shanks said as he poured him and Beckman a glass of whatever alcohol they stole from the island.

"You say that about every woman you've been with," Beckman said as he picked up the glass, blowing out a puff of smoke as he looked out into the ocean. "But you think she'd different, don't you?"

"She’s gonna be a fun one, Benn."

"What makes you so sure?"

"She’s a marine! A captain no less."

Beckman sent Shanks a glare as he drank his glass. "And you still slept with her? Captain, we're still rookies, I wouldn't be taking a thing like this as a game."

"She ain't going to do anything yet."

"...How'd you even know she was a marine?"

"The look in her eyes, and the fact that marines were scattered all over the island," Shanks replied confidently before chugging down the bottle. "I want to see where she ends up."

The two of you wouldn't interact again until a few years later. You've risen in ranks and have now became a Vice Admiral, and Shanks is now considered a major threat to the government.

Both of ships had crossed paths while at sea, and you decided to see if you stood a chance. You didn't have a devil fruit, but you were starting to master haki during this point in time.

"Long time no see, Shanks," You said as the two of you stood in front of each other. "I see you've made it big."

"I can say the same to you," Shanks responded, a smirk on his face as he checked you out. "Damn, still as beautiful as the day I met you."

"And you're charming as ever. Let's see what you got, don't go easy on me."

"Oh don't worry baby," Shanks reassured as he pulled out his sword, "I won't. "

Its safe to say that Shanks won that fight, but that wasn't the last time you guys would meet.

After that the two of you would constantly cross paths, and Shanks would never fail to make you blush. Constantly throwing flirtations your way as the two of you fought.

"You sure you don't want to join me?" Shanks asked, dodging your punch.

"Yes I'm sure, I don't think I wanna be couped up with smelling pirated all day, especially you."

"Well, this smelly pirate was the best dick you've ever had," Shanks teased, laughing as your face became one of embarrement.

The tension between you two was thick. And you wanted to beat him more than anyone. You wanted to wipe that smug look off his face, but anytime you'd get close, he'd knock you down faster than you could blink.

"What is this, 51-0?" Shanks asked as he pinned you down on the floor, the tip of his sword grazing your neck as he looked down at you.

"Shut up."

"Come on Baby, you're better than that."

The way Shanks asked you out was oddly romantic for a playboy like him. He has caught you while your ship was stationed at one of the islands in the Grand Line. You were in the woods, admiring the night sky as you came up with possible ways for your crew to get stronger. While you were thinking, you heard footsteps approaching.

When you turned around your gun was already out, and standing in front of you was Shanks, holding a bouquet of you favorite flowers. You were immediately caught off guard, just what the hell was going on.

"Shanks? What are you doing here?" You asked, lowering your gun slowly but still keeping your guard up.

"Hey, I'm not here to fight," Shanks declared. "Y/N, we've known each other for years, and the longer I've known you the more you've won over my heart. Everytime we part I keep finding myself longing for your return, waiting for our paths to cross again, even if it's for a fight I'll know I'll win."

The last sentence was a purpose jab at you, which helped in lifting up both his and your nervousness.

"I realize now that you're what I want," Shanks said as he handed you the bouquet of flowers.

"Shanks," You whispered, taking the bouquet as you tried to concele your excitement.

"Will you be my girlfriend/boyfriend?"

For the first time, Shanks saw you break your strong, cold marine persona. Before he could react you were hugging him, kissing his face more times than he can count.

"YES YES YES! FINALLY, I'VE BEEN WAITING YEARS FOR THIS!"

The two of your guys relationship is kept secret from the government, nobody outside of Shanks' crew knows about your little relationship.

Whenever you're on the battle field the two of you act far more cold towards each other than before, just to keep appearances. But, after the fights, the two of you are cutest couple to the point it's sickening, and everytime the two of you guys meet, you always end up in Shanks' Cabin.

I'd say Shanks with a Marine/Vice Admiral S/O is by far the cutest thing ever. Two strong people who constantly fight each other secretly dating, how scandalous.

Oh, and don't get me started on what your marriage would be like. That's when word gets out.

[ceilidho]

oh i just know bear latches onto the single pregnant woman working at the diner closest to his place, he sees her as a way of saving her from gods wrath if he married her and adopts her unborn child and he gets the family he always wanted with Lena (who idk she rubbed me the wrong way in the show, maybe its due to the shows inability to write woman but i digress) but like that god complex sort of mentality that has been building in him with the loss of his navy brothers, the divorce and the loss of his own child idk man youre the one with the amazing brain and ability for these concepts god i love your work sm its not funny.

oh you've got something insane cooking here........

divorce has been finalized, Lena's long moved out and maybe even left the state altogether (I'm not touching what actually happens in the last ep)......only his work is really keeping Bear upright at this point, otherwise he would've just gone on a year long bender. he still has his bad days though, weekends where he just disappears. passing out in the bushes outside his house, waking up with a kink in his neck and a headache that threatens to split his forehead open. spends his days questioning why God has allowed everything else in his life to fall apart, has allowed countless other people to die, but just won't kill him.

and then one day he stops at the diner for a quick meal before heading to the bar and notices the new waitress. pregnant, obviously so. not terribly far along, but noticeable. his first thought, the most immediate thing that jumps into his mind is what she's doing working at this crummy diner on a friday night. just his luck that he's seated in her section and remembers how to turn on the charm, smiles and asks for her name and peppers her with compliments and she just rolls her eyes and smiles bashfully like she's used to grumpy old men melting around her.

when he finds out that the guy that got her pregnant has long since skipped town, told her in no uncertain terms that he has no interest in becoming a father, Bear's eyes go cold and hard for a bit. after what he's been through, the thought of someone having everything that he's always desperately wanted handed to them on a silver platter and then...sending it back...has him feeling just a little off-kilter. not quite right. it doesn't last long and he apologizes when she seems unnerved, but the rage still sizzles under his fingertips. makes his hands shake, old nerve damage and anger problems.

but as he sits there, drinking his coffee and lingering, the hour slipping by into the next, it starts to come together in his mind. why he's been forced down this long road alone, why God hasn't struck him down yet despite every terrible thing he's done. he was supposed to be in this diner with this sweet girl and save her. make her an honest woman, give her baby a father. bring her into the lord's house and do for them what he couldn't do for his daughter and fallen brothers.

so he sips his coffee and waits for her to come back to his table. and plots.

[ennn]

Lilia and Agatha: The Comfort of Fate and Death

I've been pondering Lilia's arc in Episode 7 and what it might say about Agatha's arc and the show's exploration of fate, choices, and death, because they all seem intertwined.

Let's take a walk through my thinky thoughts, shall we?

Fate and Agency

Lilia hid from her power because all she saw was death, and she couldn't stop or change it. She had been chased away for trying to warn others of disaster. And because MCU witches can apparently live a damn long time, all this death and loss and sense of helplessness crippled her.

So she forgot herself, forgot her power. And just like Agatha, Lilia also gave up on having a coven because it didn't work out the first time.

But despite everything, Lilia did still try to make a difference in helping Billy using the sigil. She saw the boy needing help and decided to try.

And she realises she did make a difference. He's standing with her now. Despite running away from it for years, her power enabled her to do something that mattered.

And when confronted with a vision of her own death, Lilia decides not to leave the road but to go to her coven who need her. She embraces her fate (her death) and saves her coven.

It's interesting because it feels like Lilia's destiny coming true but it also feels like Lilia is making her decisions and driving her story. Because we're with Lilia as she goes through this journey.

But is it all ultimately a matter of fate? Can fate be changed or are these points fixed regardless of what we do? Because divination means they can be perceived in advance? I don't think the show will give us any definite answers. And maybe there aren't any.

Maybe it doesn't matter if it's fated or not, but what we decide to do with the information and power that we're given in a moment. I like to go back to that quote from the Angel TV series, because it sums it up so nicely:

If nothing we do matters, all that matters is what we do.

The fate and commonality of Death

It is what we all have in common.

Lilia's story also makes an important point about death: Yes, death can be frightening, and lead to pain and grief and sorrow, but it's part of being alive, part of the common human experience.

Death can tear a person apart but it can also bring people together, if you let it. It can be a comfort.

And every living thing's fate will be death, one way or another. We don’t need divination powers to know what awaits us at the end. But what will you do, knowing this fate? Not just for you but for the ones you love?

This issue is further compounded for these witches, who seem capable of living for centuries or longer. They can experience the pain of deaths across many human lifetimes and they also deal with death more often as a persecuted or misunderstood community.

Lilia tries to escape the pain of death by isolating herself from other witches and hiding away as a hermit. She doesn’t want to see, to keep futilely trying, so she runs from her power.

Agatha, on the other hand, is a creature of ego and hubris. She believes that rules can bend to her power. She refuses death, refutes it. To Agatha, death is a challenge, and perhaps the ultimate mystery – and she’s big ol' nerd who loves a mystery – so she's fascinated by it.

Complicating things is how Agatha ends up falling for Death and vice versa. And in so doing, she gets emboldened about bending the rules. She's not above manipulating Death to keep herself just a bit more safe.

But the end result for Agatha is still isolation, like Lilia, because Agatha removes herself from that common experience.

There's no one to grieve with her, to comfort her, when Nicky dies. Especially if Agatha's first instinct is to hate and blame Rio for not bending the rules for Nicky (especially if Rio did bend them a little for her).

It's actually a similar message to the Death tarot card: Change will happen. Resisting the change, not letting go, will only make the transition more painful.

Agatha clings to control but there's only so much one can control, and it's ultimately harming her. Lilia struggles with this before she is reminded that her role is only to see.

To see and ask her question to the cards, and in so doing remember herself. What she's missing, what she actually wanted to find walking the Road.

For Agatha, I think she has to come to terms with fate being bigger than her, and with having less control than she wants, than is healthy. And in so doing, open herself to a coven she deeply wants.

[hwaslayer]

project: make you love me (jyh) | thirteen.

♣︎ spotify playlist | series masterlist

—summary: yunho can’t stand how you’re so wrapped up in the notorious campus fuckboy, park seonghwa. he would gladly love you the way you deserve, despite being shy, awkward and the complete opposite of seonghwa. thus, when he finds himself spending more time with you over literature reviews and random study sessions, he decides to take on the challenge to win you over.

—pairing: jeong yunho x f. reader x park seonghwa

—genre: (18+ - minors dni) strangers/friends to lovers, college au | fluff, angst, smut

—word count: 5.9k

—chapter content/warnings: cussing/mature language, date with yunho!! 🥰, yunho and oc talk a bit about family dynamics, oc meets his mom and aunt <33, just a sprinkle of seonghwa, lots of sweet kisses, making out, breast play, unprotected sex, oral sex (f. receiving), fingering, clit play, teasing, a lil bit of a handjob, multiple orgasms (2 lol), praising, post-sex cuddles!, sorry if i missed anything - quickly edited 😅

"Why are you doing that?" Yunho laughs, grabbing at your hand and giving it a gentle squeeze from the driver's seat to prevent you from fiddling with your fingers even more.

"I'm nervous." You pout and Yunho can't help but squish your cheeks.

"It's gonna be fine." Yunho smiles before shifting his attention back to the road. "Mom couldn't stop texting me about how excited she was to finally meet you."

"Me?" You ask him, almost in disbelief. "What if she sees me and she changes her mind!"

"She won't. She wouldn't do that over—" Yunho pauses and you can see the tip of his ear turn red, a faint rosy tint also creeping up to the surface of his cheeks.

"Over?"

"Nevermind."

"Hey, that's not fair." You playfully pinch him on the bicep, making him chuckle in his response. "Say it, Jeong Yunho."

"Not the government name." You glare at him and he shakes his head in defeat. "I was just gonna say she wouldn't do that over someone I'm sure about." Your eyes widen at the response before you smile and giggle.

"You mean that?"

"Of course I do." He laughs, placing a kiss on the surface of your hand. "So trust me when I say don't worry, okay? They'll adore you."

"Okay." Your bottom lip pokes out a bit. Today, Yunho was taking you on a date. To where? He wouldn't tell you. He wouldn't budge, no. But, you do know you're meeting his mom and aunt over a small dinner at the house, your nerves running wild since the moment you've hit the road. It's been awhile since your last relationship, and you really, really adore Yunho.

You don't wanna mess this up.

You are in love with him, and you hope they like you just like he promises they will. You are already hoping to build a good relationship with them, especially if you plan to be around. You can't help but think of your own mom and sister, hoping you'll be able to be plan something soon for them so they can officially meet Yunho in the right circumstances.

Since you're in Yunho's hometown, you aren't too familiar with what's around. You keep your eyes fixed on the scenery passing you by, listening to Yunho softly hum to the music in the background while he continues to drive off to the first destination. He seems to be taking you to the outskirts, driving deeper to the point where the small city fades into the back while the greenery begins to take over. He has to drive on a narrow path before he's navigating through a beaten, dirt path and into a lot that is surrounded by apple trees.

"Yunho." You continue to look out the window as he pulls into a spot in between two trees, a few other cars lining down the aisle.

"Yes?" He shuts off the car and unbuckles his seatbelt, looking at you with a sly smirk on his face.

"What're we doing?"

"Apple picking." You squeal and clap your hands, no longer able to contain your excitement. You had briefly mentioned going fruit picking to Yunho, stating it as a bucket list item of yours. He swings your door open to help you out of the car before leading you to the bins to place your apples in. Yunho hands you one, pleading for you to try and not fill it up too much so the bin doesn't get too heavy. He leads you down the open trail, already picking at a few nice apples along the branches. You stick closer to the ones in close proximity to your height, eyes lighting up every time you're able to snag a pretty one off the branches.

"Aw, I love this." You giggle, picking a few more off of the nearby branches. "They all look too pretty to eat."

"I know. I'm grabbing a few for my mom and aunt." Yunho effortlessly grabs a few off the taller branches, placing them gently into the bin. "Wanna save some for your mom and sister?"

"Just a few. I'm not even sure when if I'll see them in time. Otherwise Soobin, Chaery and Seungmo can eat them." He smiles.

"Sounds like a plan. Are they around for break?"

"In and out. I think the person who is staying here the most is Soobin. Chaery and Seungmin have a couple of plans with their families."

"Mm."

"What about Yeo?"

"He'll mostly be at the apartment." He caresses your chin. "What about you?"

"Ah, my family isn't big on doing things. We'll celebrate for the holidays but that's all." 

"You should. I'd love to meet your mom and sister again.. under better circumstances." You laugh.

"You will." You and Yunho continue to walk down the path, each stopping to take photos of each other under the crisp, afternoon sunlight. Once you're satisfied with the amount of apples in your bin, you take them to the weighing scale and pay for the apples before grabbing a small snack of freshly baked apple fritters and tea. You and Yunho sit at a picnic table to enjoy the sun slowly settling below the horizon. Yunho shows you his new lockscreen while you eat; a picture of you holding an apple next to your cheek while you cutely smile. 

"You're really cute." He smiles at his phone just before tossing his wrappers into the trash can. 

"You take the best photos of me. You sure you aren't into photography or anything?" He shakes his head.

"No. Just like taking pictures of you, thats all." You blush. "We should probably get going. There's one more place I wanna take you before we head to my house for dinner."

"Where?" He smirks.

"It's just 15 mins away. I think you'll like it. We'll only be there for an hour since the event is gonna end soon."

"Hm, okay Yunho. Surprise me some more." You tease with a giggle.

"I will." He kisses you on the temple before holding your hand and heading back to the car. The sun hasn't completely set yet, but the skies are filled with orange and red hues as you continue to drive along to your next destination. Yunho drives off to a nearby park that holds rollerskating events in the evening, except tonight would be its last night before it's converted to an ice skating rink. Yunho talks a bit about how he spent a lot of time at this park with his friends when he was young, and how they've done a lot to make the park nicer over the years. Now, they hold plenty of events that bring the community together. 

When he pulls into another lot, you can already hear the music blaring from within the park. It's muffled due to the trees surrounding the area, but the park is well lit even though the sun hasn't fully set. There are string lights hanging from tree to tree, even around the picnic tables that are planted around the area. As Yunho continues to walk down the path, you see a circular rink where people are rollerskating. There is a DJ blasting music off to the side, and a booth where you can rent skates.

"Rollerskating?" Your eyes light up. "Yunho?!"

"Thought we could give it a try together before they get rid of it."

"You're the best." You tippy-toe to wrap your arms around his neck, planting a sweet kiss against his lips. His large hands come to squeeze your side, holding the kiss for as long as he can before he slightly pulls away.

"Actually, I wanted to ask you something." He brushes the hair away from your face, thumb coming down to caress your cheek. You feel the butterflies swirling in your stomach when Yunho looks at you, his touch simple but warm, safe.

Comforting.

"What is it, Yunho?"

"I just really, really like you, Y/N. You make me happy, and you make me feel safe. I don't feel like I have to be someone I'm not, and that's the best feeling. I don't know, you just.. bring out the best in me. It sounds cliché, but I mean it when I say I haven't felt this way before."

"I feel the same." You caress his jaw. You would have never known that asking Yunho for help would lead to this— would lead to him being a special person in your life, someone you can't imagine your days without.

"So, I-I was hoping that, maybe, you could be my girlfriend?" You giggle and hug him again, nodding to give him his answer.

"I'd love to be." He cups your cheeks and brings you in for another kiss.

"Phew. I was actually losing my shit on the way here." You laugh as Yunho leads the way to the rental booth. "I kept rehearsing it in my head."

"Why?! Did you think I was gonna reject you?"

"Uh, yeah?" He gives you a look.

"No, never."

"Never, hm?" He teases before shifting his attention to the staff member at the booth. He pays for the rentals and hands you your skates, giving you the green light to walk over to the nearest bench and slip them in. You used to rollerskate when you were younger, but it's been years and you've only tried inline skating. Yunho already seems to be more pro than you because he's standing on his two feet comfortably, while your knees are shaking and you can't seem to fully stand up. He laughs as he comes closer, creating a bit of distance to give you some space to get used to the feeling. "Slowly, baby. Shift your weight a bit." You pout as you continue to practice, finally getting into a rhythm after a good 10 minutes.

"I think I should be okay." You say, comfortably skating over to Yunho without wobbling around. He nods and takes your hand, slowly skating over to join the crowd at the rink. "How are you literally so good at everything?"

"Nah." He laughs. "We'll go slow, okay? Everyone's going at their own pace." You smile, trusting in Yunho to take care of you. You easily begin to get comfortable with the music blasting in the background, skating alongside your man as the rest of the crowd enjoys themselves. Today was such an eventful day that you're wishing it never ends. All you find yourself doing while skating is laughing with Yunho and squealing every time you feel like you're going a little too fast and lose your balance.

You feel like you're on cloud nine and you wish you can stay in this moment forever with him.

The hour wraps up quick, and the DJ is having to end the night with a bittersweet speech about how he'll miss playing for this event. You and Yunho return the skates to the booth and slip back into your shoes, rushing over to the car before the lot could get too packed from everyone leaving at once. You laugh when Yunho quickly reverses and heads out of the lot, joking about how you've never seen him move that fast. When you're finally out and away from traffic, Yunho relaxes a little and takes you back into the central part of town for dinner.

"Yuyu?" He lets out a small chuckle hearing the Chaery-granted nickname slip from your lips. Nonetheless, he's grown a liking to it and loves having a nickname you two enjoy. 

"Hm?" He hums.

"Do you remember anything about your dad?" You flat out pose the question without thinking. He doesn't answer right away so you immediately follow-up with a— "Wait, I'm sorry. We don't have to do this right now if you aren't ready."

"No, love. It's fine. I'm okay talking about it, it's just not a common topic for me." He flashes you a small, reassuring smile. "To answer your question, no, I really don't remember anything about him. I remember seeing him come and go in the apartment we lived in when I was younger, and I remember seeing going with him to see some of his side of the family. But even then, those bits are blurred. I can't imagine what he looks like now, I can't make out a height. I can't make out much of his features." Your heart sinks.

"I'm so sorry, Yunho."

"It's okay. You don't have to apologize." He shrugs. "Part of me wishes I knew a bit more than what I know, but then I think about my mom and how she never gave up on me. She gave me everything even when times were tough. She treated me well and raised me well. She never tried to raise her voice at me and she never scolded me the way other parents would. She knew how to communicate with me even when I was small. I guess I never really needed him in the first place. I didn't feel the lack of love or support anywhere."

"That's amazing. I can tell you adore your mom to bits. It must have been tough for her, and I can only imagine."

"It was. It was really tough. But, we got through it together. I tried to fill in the empty spaces as much as possible."

"You're her world, that's more than enough. I know she appreciates you so much." He smiles at you, thumb running over the back of your hand. "There's nothing that could replace you, or any other love that could be better."

"My aunt says I kinda look like him." He chuckles. "But, she says she's glad I'm the complete opposite. My mom likes to remind her that I'm hers only." You laugh.

"How cute. You are hers."

"I know you said your dad comes around, but how is he with your mom nowadays?"

"They're good. I mean, like I said, they're better this way. They still bicker but it's not like before." You let out a soft sigh. "At first, she didn't understand why my sister and I still wanted to see him and have a relationship with him after the divorce. She was hurt, I guess. After everything they've been through. But, my dad never neglected us. He was still a good dad. He still is, even with the distance. He tries."

"That's good. Sometimes, they stop when all that goes down so it's good he still tries and is present in your lives."

"Yeah, I think so. Eventually, my mom understood that we still wanted him to be in our lives no matter what. And, I think she could see he felt the same." 

"That's nice. Do you see him for holidays?"

"He'll pop in for a little." Yunho nods. "Even though I'm nervous, I can't wait to meet your mom and aunt." You shift the topic back to his family.

"Hm, really?" He chuckles. "I can't wait for you to meet them, too. Especially since we're right around the corner."

"Already?!" He nods.

"Already. She told me they prepped a lot of food so.. should be fun."

"Now I'm even more nervous." You whine a bit and he laughs.

"It'll be fine, baby. Trust me." The petname makes your stomach do flips, but you can't really think about that now. He pulls around the corner and into the driveway of the 5th house down the street. The lights in the house are all on, and you can faintly see shadows moving around in what you assume is the kitchen area. "Ready?" He unbuckles his seatbelt and gives you a soft smile.

"Mhm." Yunho comes to assist you in the passenger's side, grabbing the bag of apples from behind your seat to bring into the house. He takes his keys from the carabiner hanging on his jeans, unlocking the door to a fairly loud house— mainly due to the TV in the living room.

"Hello?" Yunho calls out and you hear his aunt scream in excitement.

"Yunho! You made it." His mom greets him first before his aunt does. She looks at you with a soft smile, immediately welcoming you into her arms.

"This is Y/N." He steps aside to let you finish greeting his mom and his aunt, the both of them wrapping you into big, tight hugs.

"She's a pretty one, how did you manage to snag her?" His aunt teases, making his mom smack her on the arm in response.

"Yeah, right?" Yunho playfully agrees anyway.

"Come on, Y/N! Make yourself feel at home. Food is ready, I'm sure you two are starving."

"Thank you." You smile at her and follow her into the dining area. The table is set nicely, with a few candles in the center to help bring in some warmth and those winter season smells you love so much. You almost feel bad that they've cooked so much food, but Yunho is happy and he's excited to dig in. He pulls out your chair before sitting next to you, hand on your thigh to give it a comforting, reassuring squeeze.

"Y/N, please. Go ahead and start. What drinks do you two want?" His aunt asks.

"I'll help you."

"I'm okay with water. Thank you." Yunho stands to help his aunt with the drinks, his mom sitting in front of you with a smile on her face.

"It really is so nice to finally meet you. Yunho doesn't stop talking about you." You hear Yunho clear his throat as he hands you a cup of water.

"Not like that. I take some breaks in between." He jokes.

"He definitely doesn't." His mom corrects him, handing you the bowl of rice. "It's cute to see him all shy like this. He really likes you, and I can see why." You giggle.

"Oh, well. I can say the same." You help yourself to some rice before passing more food around the table. "Yunho's very sweet. He helped me a lot with one of our classes."

"That's cute." His aunt plops onto her seat and laughs. "Tell us about yourself, Y/N. We've been dying to meet you." You laugh, proceeding to tell them more about yourself, your mom, dad and sister. As you've continued to talk about your childhood and how things have been over the years, you find yourself comfortable enough to open up about both the highs and lows being with your family. It was nice to hear Yunho's mom and aunt reassure you, telling you it was nice that your family still got along no matter the circumstance.

Then, you and Yunho talked a little bit more about school and how you two got close over literature class. You shyly praise him in front of his family, telling them how one of your favorite things about him was his humor and how laidback he's always been. Yunho's mom tells you that Yunho has always remained the same throughout the years— that he's always been the same 'sweet, affectionate, funny-boned' boy she's always adored.

After a good, long dinner, you and Yunho help clean up in the kitchen, tagteaming on dishes while his mom and aunt cleaned the table and around the counters. His mom packs you both some leftovers, telling you to share with your roommates. She packs it neatly into separate bags for you and Yunho, handing it over with a sweet smile on her face.

"It's late. You should've just stayed." You hug Yunho's aunt before hugging his mom. She keeps her arm around you, gently rubbing at your back as she continues to softly scold Yunho.

"It's not that late, mom. I'll be okay."

"Still! It's dark out and you have a two hour drive ahead of you."

"I know, I know. Next time." He looks at his mom. "May I have my girlfriend back?"

"Maybe." His mom teases back. "Promise me you'll stay next time."

"Promise." Yunho winks at his mom as he finally gets a hold of your hand and leads you out to the car.

"Mhm. I saw that. Seriously, come back soon, okay? You two better stay here next time." His aunt says, making you laugh as you wave.

"We will. I'll make sure of it." You respond.

"I really like her." His aunt says loud enough for you to hear, causing you to giggle to yourself while you settle into the passenger's seat.

"Yunho." His mom calls out just as he's about to step in, one leg already thrown into the car.

"Huh?"

"Drive safely."

"Of course. I'll tokyo drift all the way back to the apartment, how's that? Gets me there faster."

"Jeong Yunho!" She playfully scolds him.

"Kidding. I will!" He laughs and waves her off, finally getting into the car.

"Stop teasing your mom like that." You chuckle.

"It's funny, isn't it?"

"You're too much." Yunho smiles and kisses your hand just before holding it. 

"Mm, wanna watch a movie when we get back? If you're not too tired."

"I'm down."

"You're gonna fall asleep on the way, aren't you?"

"Maybe." You shyly admit. You are feeling pretty exhausted after your day, but you're trying your hardest not to give in so you can continue to keep Yunho company on the long drive back. "But, I'm trying to stay up so I can keep you company.

"It's okay, baby." He says softly, eyes glued onto the road ahead. "If you wanna nap, you should nap."

"What about you?" You yawn, head leaning back against the headrest.

"I'm used to these drives. I'll be okay. Promise."

"Okay." You feel your eyes getting heavy. It isn't long before you fall asleep, Yunho turning down the music and turning up the heat. Quite frankly, he is tired. But, he wasn't lying when he said he was used to these drives. Plus, overall, he does enjoy driving. It soothes him, relaxes him.

He can't wait to get back home and cuddle with you over a movie.

You're his, and he is yours.

The thought alone makes Yunho feel so giddy inside.

After a somewhat grueling 2 hours, Yunho finally pulls into the familiar lot. You had woken up about 30 minutes ago, and Yunho is glad you did or else he'd feel terrible having to wake you up from a good slumber in the car. The both of you make your way back up to his apartment, finding that Yeosang isn't home. The apartment is dark, but warm. It's spotless and it's incredibly quiet. 

You make your way to the restroom to quickly freshen up and change into Yunho's shirt for the night. You brush your teeth and finish up your bedtime routine before stepping out, seeing Yunho sitting on the living room floor while flipping through the movie options.

"I'll be back." He points to the TV. "I kinda just settled on that new Leave the World Behind movie." 

"Sounds good to me." He quickly eyes his shirt on you, no bottoms. And god, it instantly drives him crazy. Before he could fall too deep into his feelings, Yunho waddles off to the bathroom to get ready for the evening and changed into some sweats and a shirt. By the time he heads back out to the living room, you've shut off all the lights, and you've paused the movie right at the beginning. Your eyes are fixed on your phone, and a few texts come in. But, Yunho doesn't really pay much attention to it and instead plops onto the ground right in front of you.

chaery: hello?! I SAW YOUR STORY. did he finally ask you to be his gf?! holy shit!!

seungmin: y/n's tied down now ayeeee

soobin: congrats!! when's the wedding!!

seonghwa: i see you're around for break.

seonghwa: wanted to see you really quickly and apologize. you don't have to do anything or say anything, but at least hear me out.

You roll your eyes at the two texts from Seonghwa, quickly responding to your roommates before locking your phone and tossing it aside.

"You don't wanna sit up here?" Your arms hang over Yunho as your chin rests on his head.

"I need to stretch." He laughs. "Sorry pretty. I'll be right here." He resumes the movie just as you kiss the top of his head and switch your attention to the screen.

The both of you are equally invested in the movie, even as you continue to hang over Yunho while he holds onto your arms. You've barely even reached halfway when catch yourself ogling at Yunho's hands and the veins that run through them. You peek over to see how glued he is to the movie, eyeing his side profile before placing a gentle kiss on his temple, cheek. He giggles a bit before looking up at you, the mood in the room doing a complete flip when he sees the look in your eyes.

It's the same look he had when he was checking you out in his shirt.

"What's up, cutie?"

"I just wanna say thank you for today."

"You don't have to thank me."

"I do. I really enjoyed it, so thank you, babe." 

"Of course. Is there anything else on your mind?"

"Just wanna kiss you."

"That's it?" He teases, watching as you dip forward to close in on his lips.

"Maybe." You whisper just as you kiss him. At first, the kiss is sweet, innocent. The next moment, it's deeper, more intense— your tongue dancing around with his while the movie is a long-gone thought in the background. Yunho gently bites onto your bottom lip before pulling back; eyes full of lust meeting yours.

"Do you wanna move to the room?" He licks his lips while his eyes dart from your eyes, back down to your lips. 

"Mhm." You respond softly, hands still cupping Yunho's cheeks. He smiles and plants a quick kiss to your lips before standing to his feet. He shuts off the movie and helps you up from the couch, leading you to his room. Yunho shuts his door, watching as you climb into bed and under the covers. It's not long before he joins you— slightly hovering over you as he pulls the covers over his body. 

"Baby." He calls lowly. 

"Yeah?" Your fingers are tangled at the ends of his hair, eyes scanning every feature on Yunho's face— his long lashes, his pink lips, his doe eyes, his soft, black hair. You adore everything about Yunho, and you can't help but melt in his hold.

"Is it okay if I keep going..?" You nod quietly as Yunho leans in to meet your lips again, hand coming up underneath your shirt to caress your bare skin. His hand his warm against the surface, and it's enough to light up your entire body; fireworks going off every time Yunho deepens the kiss a little more. He gives your side a squeeze, lips now trailing down to the corner of your lips, your jaw.

Neck.

Yunho takes his time on your neck, though. And god, do you love every bit of it. You squirm underneath him, teeth nibbling on your bottom lip when you feel Yunho's tongue glide across the surface before gently sucking on it, when you feel him slowly rocking his hips against you. He catches the way you continue to bite onto your lip, smirking against your skin just as he places another kiss at the base.

Down to your collarbone.

"Can I?" He whispers, slowly lifting up the edge of your shirt. You nod, lifting yourself up to help Yunho tug the shirt over your head and onto the floor. He takes a moment to admire your bare chest, eyes glowing at how beautiful you look underneath him. "So pretty." His eyes are now glued onto yours as he continues to leave a trail of kisses down your chest. His tongue glides over to a nipple, popping the bud into his mouth before working his tongue in a circular motion. You let out a small whimper and Yunho feels the blood rush straight down to his dick.

He can't wait to have all of you. To have a taste, to feel you around him.

As his and his only.

He moves to the next bud, sucking gently before repeating the circular motions around your nipple— pulling back with a small pop. You feel the goosebumps heighten on your arms, the pleasure already surging through your veins. 

"Taking these off." Yunho says as he makes his way down, finger slightly dipping underneath the waistband of your pjay bottoms. You watch as he sheds off your bottoms and panties, tossing them off to the side to join your [his] shirt on the floor. You feel incredibly shy being this bare, this vulnerable, in front of Yunho. But, the feeling dissipates when he smiles in awe; his large hands caressing your thighs and giving them a kiss. "You're so beautiful." He plants a kiss to your inner thigh. "Wanna make you feel good, love." He watches for your response as he softly nibbles on your inner thigh. 

"Please." You respond, almost whimpering for him to continue. Your breath hitches when you feel his thumb graze over your folds then press on your clit. He starts to rub your already sensitive nub in slow, circular motions to test the waters, before diving in with his tongue against you. His other hand is gripping your thigh, keeping your legs spread open so he could get you in all angles, taste every drop of you. "Yunho." You breathily moan, hands tangled in his hair as he continues to lap at your folds and suck on your clit. He proceeds with slipping a finger inside of you, pumping at a slow and steady pace while continuing to work his tongue on you. It's not long before he's slipping another digit in— this time, watching your reaction from in between your thighs, biting onto his lip every time you squirm and moan for him to keep going.

Yunho finds, at this very moment, that he can't get enough of you. He wants to be the only one who keeps making you feel good, and he wants to keep hearing you like this. He wants to be everything for you, as long as you'll let him.

"All this for me, hm?" He hums, feeling his digits coated in your slickness. He quickly removes his fingers and replaces the pleasure with his tongue again, allowing you to grind against him when he picks up his pace— lapping at your folds and flicking at your clit; sucking every drop of you he can get.

"Oh—Yunho!” You almost yell his name, hands now gripping his hair as you continue to grind against his mouth. He lets out a groan against you, sending the vibrations straight to your core. "Oh shit, I'm—" Your statement is broken because your mind is fuzzy with your orgasm approaching quick. You're probably gripping on Yunho's hair a little too tightly without realizing but he doesn't mind. Especially when your face contorts in pleasure, a beautiful, strangled moan leaving your lips as you twitch in his grip. He keeps your legs opened, mouth still latched onto you until you've come down from your high. "Oh my god." You mumble and Yunho chuckles. 

"You okay, baby?" You nod just as Yunho leans forward to kiss you, letting you taste yourself on his lips. "Wanna feel you." He takes your hand and presses it against his hardened cock. He hisses at your touch, shutting his eyes for a brief moment as you palm him through his sweats. "See what you do to me? Want all of you."

"You have me, Yunho." You tug at his shirt, giving him leverage to shed it off and toss it on the floor. "You have me." You repeat. He simply sheds off his sweats and boxers, his cock springing free from its confines. You can't help but ogle at how he's built— his toned abs, his biceps, his pretty, thick cock. You help yourself and continue to stroke him for a bit, pumping at a slow pace while your thumb spreads the pre-cum all over his tip. He lets out a shaky breath just as he lowers himself onto you, planting kisses along your jaw and neck.

"Fuck. I don't have any condoms." He pauses and looks at you, but you respond by shaking your head.

"It's fine. I'm on birth control. And clean. Promise." You reassure him, knowing you made sure to get tested after Seonghwa just in case. He nods and takes his length in his hand, gently tapping it against your folds and nudging the tip against your clit to tease you.

"Ready?"

"Yes. Need you." Yunho wastes no time pushing himself into you slowly, burying himself to the hilt. He pauses for a minute to adjust to the feeling, giving you a moment to take him in. His forehead is pressed against yours as he lays a kiss on the tip of your nose, moving down to your lips. He holds the kiss for a second before parting, savoring the feeling of your lips against his for the brief moment.

Yunho begins to pick up his pace, letting out a small groan when he feels how tight you are. He loves seeing your back slightly arch, the goosebumps forming on your skin when he touches you lightly— lips grazing the surface of your collarbones, chest, just ghosting over your nipples. You moan his name when he quickly sucks on your buds, snapping his hips at a faster pace. The room is filled with sounds of skin against skin, wet kisses and moans that are nothing short of pornographic. Yunho thrusts hard one, two, three times, his mouth swallowing the loud moan you let out.

"God, you feel so good around me." He says. "Like you were meant for me."

"I am." You cutely respond and Yunho lets out a shaky breath.

"Mmmfuck." Yunho lets out just as he takes his thumb to your clit. You feel the tingle down your spine, the pleasure building in your gut, as Yunho rolls his hips in a steady fashion; enough to drive you crazy, pushing you close to the edge. "Gotta cum for me, baby."

"So close." You moan, gently biting at his bottom lip and tugging it back. "I'm so close, babe."

"That's my girl." He says, taking note of how you continue to squirm in his hold, your walls clenching around him.

That's it.

You're my babygirl. 

So good for me.

He continues to praise you in your ear until he finally tips you over the edge, eyes shut close as you let out a string of moans— calling his name like a mantra. Yunho feels you squeeze him, walls wrapping him so tightly he might just lose himself right at this moment. So, he locks his hands with yours— holding it against the pillow as he thrusts into you and chases his own high.

Luckily, Yeosang hasn't walked in yet or else he's not really sure how Yeo would react to hearing your loud moans. Yunho doesn't care much to shush you right now, though. He loves hearing it. He's basking in all of this, all of you.

"Y/N—" He groans. "Baby, where do you want me?"

"Inside, please." You're finally meeting his gaze with those doe-eyes of yours and Yunho lets himself go. He moans as his hips stutter, coating your walls as he releases and fills you up. It takes a moment before he comes back down from his orgasm, Yunho looking at you through hooded eyes before lazily planting a kiss on your lips. 

"You okay?" He whispers, brushing the hair away from your face. 

"Mhm." You kiss him again before he leaves the covers, snatching a piece of tissue from his desk to clean you up.

"I'll grab you some water. Do you want anything else, love?" You shake your head and slip back into his shirt.

"No, thank you." He smiles while throwing on his boxers and sweats, walking out to grab some cold water. He comes back shortly, shutting his door before handing you the water. You take a few gulps before you're satisfied, leaving the water aside to slip under the covers and get comfortable. Yunho immediately pulls you into his arms; one arm around your neck, with the other wrapped around your waist. "You're so warm." He chuckles.

"Good. As long as you're okay." He kisses your forehead. "Y/N?"

"Yeah?"

"You’re everything to me.”

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