#though sometimes this means i run the risk of trapping them on a discord call or in an uncomfortable sitting/laying position

[the-dye-stained-socialite]

truest way of letting someone know you care aboit and trust them: repeatedly falling asleep on them

[inventors-fair]

First Name, Last Name, Occupation Commentary

You guys really swung for the fences for this one. I was inspired to run this by fun little cards like Cat Warriors, Goblin Assassin, and Dragon Turtle. Cards that do one type by way of another. You guys, for the most part, tried to get as weird as possible, more akin to Urza’s Saga. I purposefully left it open ended to allow non-creatures, but I did not expect about half the cards to be a type other than creature. Some people in the Discord tried to break the rules even more than that. Personally, I wish there were more simple creatures, but I’m happy with what I got.

So without further ado, here’s the commentary! They’re alphabetical by submitter’s tumblr name or preferred credit.

@alextfish​ - Fractal Fish

Holy moly that’s some fish, visually and mechanically. So let me try to parse this: the first time, you attack, get two fish, then next time you turn those two fish (which hopefully also got in for damage) into two counters. So every other turn it doubles the number of counters, assuming you get in with it every time. At a minimum, it’s a little Tana/Living Hive that can’t be used moe than once. It feels weird for this effect to be in blue, though I get why from a flavor perspective. This does feel like a fish, though, and it definitely feels like a fractal. This card feels top down, which is fine, but I’m just not super into it. It feels unnecessarily complex for an effect that you probably only want to trigger once, maybe twice. I still think it’s really cool.

Allie - Urza’s Treasure

It’s a bit of a stretch to have a land named “Urza’s Treasure” but it’s less of a stretch than urza’s saga, so you’re good. The idea of a treasure land in general is cool to me: it’s worse than Tendo Ice Bridge and Aether Hub, but the artifact synergy is notable. Then we get to the last ability: this card is a mox opal. Or maybe a glimmer void? There are a lot of comparisons, but I don’t know which is the most appropriate. A land that effectively doesn’t tap for mana unless you have metalcraft seems awful, but I’ve seen enough affinity to know that that won’t slow it down a bit. So this is essentially a card that’s only good for broken decks, and honestly, I don’t think they need the help. I think the fact that it’s so all or nothing is a bit of a deal breaker. Every part of this card is either massive downside, massive upside, or both. You could argue that makes it balanced, but I’d argue it just makes it broken. I also wish the “Urza’s” part of the typeline played into it more, but I realize the type doesn’t have much of a mechanical throughline.

@arixordragc​ - Warrior Dragon

Ooh, a bold choice. Dragon Warrior and Warrior Dragon send two completely different feels, and this one is definitely the cooler one. Six mana 6/6 flyer is a good rate, but not so good it doesn’t get good abilities. The abilities it gets are a ghostly prison and two circle of flames. I really like how they both have a similar feels: 2 damage and two mana. However, I think the two abilities are att odds. If you need one, you probably don’t need the other. If your opponent has a lot of 1/1 or 2/2 creatures, they won’t be able to pay 2 for each them, and if they do, they’d just die. The damage does have a little bit of meaning, though, because if they attack with a big creature you don’t have to deals as much damage to it. I also just would have expected a warrior dragon to be more offensive than defensive. This feels more like a guard or defender rather than a warrior. So it might be better to have one be offense and one be defensive. Perhaps one ability could affect blockers and one attackers? This is a good card, and a cool set of effects, I just think it needs to work on multiple angles. I also think this could be a rare: it’s not so powerful you wouldn’t want it appearing more often in packs, and it’s not too complex.

@bread-into-toast​ - Zombie Mole

I like the flavor of a zombie mole, since it’s already in the dirt. I do think this sounds better than your original entry, Graveborn Mole, but I think the old one told a more complete story. The card itself is pretty neat, it’s a classic red black aggro card with a big body and a risk payoff. There’s some stuff I don’t like about it. First, sacrificing a land is one of those things that players don’t realize how bad it is for you, so this could lead to a lot of players screwing themselves over, especially if it’s as uncommon. Second, the fact that it can be recast with it’s own trigger, such as when you attack, sac a land, let it die, and then get it back because you had a land die is a bit too synergistic, especially because it gets him back untapped. This means that you have a 5/5 on turn two that if you somehow get to kill by blocking they can just pay two to save and untap it. Again, at uncommon, this is very strong, even if the downside is also very strong. The design as a whole is pretty cool, but I think it’s going to lead to a lot of unhappy players on one or both sides of the field. As a final note, I really liked that you put some art direction in the submission (for those at home, it said “Mood: a giant undead mole attacks, startling the giant (living) moles and miners around it”). It’s a cool way to get a lot of the benefits of art without having to make your own or go hunting.

@charmera​ - Giant Golem Knight

I think the name here is pretty close. It feels a little awkward to say, but I’ve seen worse. The card is a little weak and a little poorly templated, but nothing that can’t be fixed. For the templating issue, I think telling a player they can’t do something then telling them they can in a different place doesn’t work. Cards like Manor Gargoyle that do this just remove Defender. Since this also says can’t block, though, you’d need something different. I might suggest just changing it to “~ can’t attack or block unless you sacrificed an artifact this turn.” It would power it up just a little in the process, but I think that’s called for. A 6 mana 6/7 is not really above the curve, and the activated ability is hard enough to activate that it doesn’t really pump up the power level of the card as a whole. Vigilance also seems weird on a card that needs to pay to both attack and block.  I could see a specific format being able to break this card, but as something you’d see in a core set, it would need a lot of support to see play. I really like the design and concept, it just needs to be rebalanced a bit.

@col-seaker-of-the-memiest-legion​ - Arcane Trap

So, this one is interesting to me. The base rate on this card is good. Glimmer of Genius and Glimpse the multiverse are both super playable and both have a little something extra. In this case, the little something extra is the trap text, and the idea of repeating this card with arcane spells is pretty enticing for the decks that would play it. But there’s something missing here: the trap text doesn’t feel trappy. It’s a bonus, sure, but if you look at all of the existing traps in the game, the difference between hard casting and trap casting is usually massive, sometimes the entire cost! This instead reminds me more of “gotcha!” from unhinged, where the punishment for a player doing something is that you get a card back from your graveyard. It also doesn’t feel very trap-like because it doesn’t punish a player doing the trap-thing. Usually if an opponent is drawing cards it’s a good idea to out-draw them, and splicing helps with that, but it’s not like this is the “ha, you fool!” card that most traps are. It’s just a little bonus. Like when your opponent adds to your storm count. Functionally, I think this card is cool and feels unique, but doesn’t quite feel like it’s representing its types well. Also, nice job giving trap card art to a trap card.

@davriel-canes-tea-supplier​ - Hellion Demon

You did this for the pun and you know it. Demon straight out of hell...ion. I’d love to see what this guy would end up looking like (not gonna dock points for that or anything, just on my mind). So first, the templating. You don’t need to tell them to sacrifice a totla of X, since X is undefined at that point. You can just say “you may sacrifice any number of creatures. If you do, ~ gets +X/+X until end of turn and deals X damage to target creature you don’t control, where X is the total power of creatures sacrificed this way.” I also might suggest swapping it to a reflexive trigger, AKA swapping “if you do” with “when you do,” which means your opponent will be able to respond after knowing what you sacrificed. Right now, you could target one of their creatures on attacking, then they wouldn’t know what you’re sacing to do it until after they decide if they want to protect their creature. Then again, maybe that’s for the best, since it would also mean if they bounce their own creature in response, you don’t have to sacrifice anything because it wouldn’t do anything. And actually the trigger would be stifled anyway because it has no targets, which is awkward if you were planning to just use it as a pump. What I’m trying to say is that this card has an incredibly complex trigger with a lot of pieces going on. I think it might be worth it, though, because this is a cool effect. A mix between a fling and a nantuko shade effect. It’s a really cool concept, but it’s doing so much that it doesn’t do a great job at mimicking either, and in the end I just wish it had two different abilities that were linked or something easier to parse.

@Deg99 - Instant Trap

Okay, this is a silly card, and I’ll judge it as such. The blue = water is flavorfully pretty fun and funny, but color hate is always going to perform a little weird. But traps are famous for that! Usually, though, traps care about colors if they are built to be good against that color, and in this case, maybe? I don’t know if casting a free trap is particularly good against blue, so I’m firmly putting the trap text in trinket text land. The card itself does exactly what you’d expect. It tutors and plays a trap. Instantly. None of the traps in the game are super powerful, so you’re kind of avoiding the usual tutor issue of always searching for the same card / having exactly one tutor target that’s good. This is especially cool because the traps are by design extremely situational, so having this as a toolbox option is actually kind of useful. I think you’d usually end up getting needlebite trap, lavaball trap, or maybe mindbreak trap because it would be good in the matchup anyway. As a whole, this card is both kind of silly and kind of cool. I like it, but I wish there was some way to make this more interesting.

@demimonde-semigoddess​ - Droning Licid

Wait a second, did you just make licids make sense? Putting bestow on a licid makes it feel just like a licid. Turning drone into droning is pretty clever, though you got the types backwards on the typeline. Granting abilities not on the normal creature is something we saw just the barest amount of bestow cards back in OG Theros block. The eldraziness of it I wish was more relevant. I love the idea of using colorless as the alternate cost, since colorless is sort of treated like a bonus, not a given, especially in limited. But the two abilities need keywords. I played that block a lot, and even I kind of forgot what they did. It’s also weird that it grants devoid, but doesn’t have it itself. You could have even given it a colorless mana cost, since nothing it does is particularly black. Every ability on the card was in every color (yes, even devoid, you know what I mean). If this was a purely colorless card it’d be cool, but it’s fine in black. This card has a lot of things meant to make other things easier (enchantments for constellation, devoid for colorless matters, ingest for processing, bestow for heroic), so I’m super curious what set this would go in! But in a normal set, this is just a really weird card. I still think it’s neat, and again I’ll reiterate I’m happy you made a sensible licid, I’m just a little confused by its existence.

@dimestoretajic​ - Hag Fish

A hag fish is a real thing, and a hag that is a fish is what we have here. This card seems pretty powerful. It’s somewhere between a thallid and a tendershoot dryad and an ant queen. I wish the slime counters had some other use, like granting hexproof or unblockable or something. It would up the power level, which I don’t think this card needs, but it would make it feel more like it was slime on her rather than slime coming off of here. On a grander design level, I think this card requires a lot of paying attention for very little benefit. You get slime counters quickly enough you’ll rarely run out of them, but you will just often enough that you do. The tokens have evolve, which is a hard trigger to remember some times, especially on tokens that you might not have printed versions of. Plus, putting dice on tokens is also hard, since some players use dice for tokens. So while the card’s flavor and concept is pretty cool, I think it’s too complex for how simple it wants to be.

@fractured-infinity​ - Treasure Goblin

I’ve been told this is a reference, but sadly I don’t get it. Instead, I get golden goblins. The fail state on this card is still pretty good. A 2/1 haste for two mana ain’t nothing! And just using it as a bad skirk prospector can be useful too. I like the utility of it, too, in that once you are unable to attack with it as a 2/1, you can sacrifice it for mana to power out a flying dragon or something. This card isn’t super exciting, but it certainly gets the job done.

@gollumni​ - Gold Drake

Gold: the long lost parent of treasure. I didn’t even know that it had been errata'd to be its own artifact type. Anyway, the card itself is a reference to gilded drake. It even got hit by the card Gild! However, gilded drake is a super broken card! This is worse in the sense that it costs one extra mana and you ramp your opponent, but the artifact typing makes it easier to tutor and cheat into play, or to kill. Also, the way the last ability is phrased, I think you can sacrifice it to the gold ability and still get your opponent’s creature. If it said “exchange,” it wouldn’t, because exchanging needs both things in play. So this is a three mana permanent control magic that gives you one mana back immediately. I don’t think that was the intent.

@grornt​ - Skeleton Samurai

Now that is a skeleton samurai! It reanimates itself like a skeleton, it bushidos like a samurai. Three mana feels pretty good for it, since it fights as a 4/3. Now, normally, skeletons enter the battlefield tapped, but I understand not wanting to do that here. After all, it’s got bushido, blocking is a huge part of that! But the reason cards like this enter tapped is to stop you from blocking with it every turn and stonewalling your opponent. But how often is that? Well, this is where it gets tricky. Depending on the standard format, losing life on your own turn is either something you have to build around or effortless. In formats with shocklands, painlands, fetchlands, or even a single mana confluence, you’ll be casting this essentially for free. So assuming it’s in something like current standard, where it’s a little tough, maybe this guy is okay. I just worry about a 4/3 blocker that can’t be easily killed. But I guess that’s why you put it at rare, which was a good choice, but I think almost every player would be disappointed to find this creature as their rare. I do love the name and effects of this card as a pair, but I think it could lead to frustrating games.

@helloijustreadyourpost​ - Phyrexian Druid

This card has a lot of style and flair, but I’m a little cautious of it. A good comparison point for this card is Oasis Ritualist. Both can tap for one mana or two mana but at a higher cost. The mana cost and body are an important difference, and I think might balance each other out, as well as the fact that the phyrexian can only tap for green or green black. I do like that it implies that the set leans black, which feels right for return to new phyrexia. I’m having a little bit of difficulty judging power level: the life payment doesn’t really power down the card that much, but we’ve seen double ramp at 3 mana before, albeit never this versatile or at common. Still, maybe it’s fine in 2021 magic? After all, this is new phyrexia we’re talking about. Speaking of, I like how the life payment mimics phyrexian mana, and specifically phyrexian black mana. That’s a cool bonus for experienced players. I think this is a very well designed card, but I’d be very scared to print it unless I was certain there weren’t any green 6 drops at common that would be oppressive to the format when played on turn 3.

@hypexion​ - Skeleton Knight

Undead in white are something I wish we’d see more of. The idea of duty extending beyond life feels super white, but is only ever represented in spirits. But here we have a skeleton! I like the base body, and it does feel pretty skeletonny, though the knight aspect is a little weak. Vigilance is cool but at 1 toughness I don’t know how often it will be able to attack and still block. The reanimation clause is also a little funky, since it returns it to play on attacks, but doesn’t put it into play attacking as I’d expect. It’s also odd that it comes back tapped, though for gameplay reasons I understand. You don’t want to give players a creature that can block for free every turn. Templating-wise, I should also bring up that there needs to be and “if ~ is in your graveyard” between the words “knights” and “you may.” I’m using cards like Auntie’s Snitch and Master of Death for reference there. My final thoughts on the card is that it’s fine, but the two types don’t mesh as well together as I had hoped.

@i-am-the-one-who-wololoes​ - Spirit Shade

What a strange little creature. Shades are weird, because their signature ability is incredibly powerful and they need a pretty big downside to make them balanced. In your case, tying them to swamps is pretty clever! They already like swamps because of their heavy black costs, so this is a cool way to reinforce that. I still think this is pretty aggressive for a common, but I might be being a little too cautious. My bigger complaint is how awkwardly the sludge counters feel. This is a creature who’s already going to be tough to track since it’s constantly changing P/T, so having counters on it that change a bunch is a lot of complexity, especially at common. If there were also +1/+1 counters in this set, this card would be impossible to track in paper. I also think I would have preferred the name the other way around, but I’ll admit that’s a preference. I like this card in general, but I wish it were more player-friendly.

@loreholdlesbian​ - Sand Elemental

Sand is a creature type not a lot of people expected, but I have a friend with a Hazezon Tamar deck so I knew. It’s a really clever answer to the prompt, especially since you’re using the word “sand” as an adjective, but it is still also made out of sand! A colorless 3 mana 3/2 is good power level for a common I think, and the ability on it is tough enough to make work that it doesn’t push the card too hard. The fact that it’s asking you to pay 7 mana also means that, so long as you have at least a few deserts in your deck, you’re probably going to have one in play or in your graveyard. The graveyard clause fits the theme of other desert cards, but I don’t know if you’d need in a theoretical future set with deserts. Their inclusion in Amonkhet block was mostly so players wouldn’t feel bad for cycling their deserts in the early game. But hey, maybe that’s just what deserts are now! So as a whole I think this card is pretty well designed, if a bit bland, but it works well with the theme of the week and possibly the set it's in. Good work!

@morbidlyqueerious​ - Nightmare Spider

This card has a lot going on. The name feels okay. It’s a little odd, but it works in context. The ability feels creepy and scary, which is both a nightmare thing and a spider thing, but a spider without reach will always feel strange. As the for the ability, it needs a little work. There’s some strangeness with the revealing. It only really matters during a multiplayer game, otherwise just revealing every draw would be simpler and save some text, which I think this card needs. Second is the split payment: you lose 1 life, but you also pay two mana. One is optional, one isn’t, and one is 1 and one is 2. I could see this getting confusing to players. I could see swapping some things around to either make them all optional, all life, and/or all 2’s. Lastly, and this is the important one, this card isn’t fun. WotC is pretty solid on not wanting fateseal effects in the game. It makes what is already a frustrating part of the game (the variance of topdecking) into a more frustrating part. Because of the mana payment, is also means that both players will probably end up doing nothing on their turn. The fact that it can’t hit lands is actually kind of odd. Often that’s what you’ll be doing with this card anyway: forcing them to draw lands. I also sort of wish you would have swapped the P/T. I know spiders usually have higher toughnesses, but I’d like this card if it were easily killable but would end the game quickly if it really did take control of the game. Plus, the fact that you keep losing life regardless of if you pay the two means this kind of has a downside that would be more fitting on an aggro card. So while I think it fits the theme of the contest pretty well, and flavorfully it feels very nightmarish and spidery, I worry that it’s too complex and could lead to frustrating games.

@nicolbolas96​ - Urza’s Fortification

This is… a weird one. So, you have made a land that can attach to other lands. I would be much more okay with that if it couldn’t still tap for mana. As is, it performs more like soulbond, since both things can still do the same stuff, they just get a little better. I’d also like it to turn off the original because the ability it’s granting is bonkers. Paying three mana to turn a land into a tolarian academy is an incredibly low cost. The land itself being an artifact also means you don’t even get the normal downside of tolarian academy not tapping for anything if you don’t have another artifact. You can even attach it to a land, tap that land for mana, then use some of that mana to tap another land. This means once you have four other artifacts, each of your lands tap for two mana or more. Being legendary and coming into play tapped isn’t enough of a downside for that. This would be strong even in a modern horizons set. I will say this: I do love the flavor. This really feels like an Urza’s land, which is not easy to do. The idea of a land that moves to other lands and is also a machine somehow feels cool and flavorful, too.

@nine-effing-hells​ - Constructed Cleric

Remember when they printed an artifact cleric in Guild of Ravnica and no one knows why? Well, here’s a robot cleric that feels more clericy. The name is a great fit, and I love the flavor of it. The twobrid mana symbols are a cool way to make it feel more artifacty, but I think they weren’t particularly necessary. No one is going to play this in a colorless deck, and splashing for it doesn’t seem worth the effort. The difference between 4 and 8 mana for the activated ability is huge. So yes, I think this card would see play almost exclusively in mono-white decks. And how is it there? Pretty good! Granting lifelink to your whole board every turn is very powerful, it makes it nearly impossible to race, but you do need at least a bit of a board. I think this is a solic card in a lot of decks, pretty well balanced, so far as I can tell, and the only real issue I have with it is how weird the twobrid is in it.

@pocketvikings​ - Hamster Advisor

What a pleasant little fellow. Not something I’d normally expect to see in MtG, but I’ll let it slide. I wish there were some flavor text explaining what he’s advising me on. Is he just telling me not to eat my food? So this card is very similar to the card Tajurur Preserver, what with being two green and preventing sac effects (primarily a counter to annihilator), but this guy has the upside of making a food but the downside of turning off your own food. I might suggest using that card’s templating or Angel of Jubilation’s templating. Maybe “You can’t sacrifice permanents or discard cards to activate abilities,” then on another ability the text from Tajurur preserver but with discard added on. It seems strange to see this card at uncommon, since it feels mostly like it’s protecting you from very specific effects that may or may not be in the format. It’s actually a pretty big downside in some decks, like turning off fetchlands, and of course if you’re playing this in a food deck you won’t want in play for long. That’s cool, and we’ve seen that on some black cards like Priest of the Blood Rite. I think this card feels out of place in a lot of formats and a lot of decks in particular, but I’m interested in the implications of it.

@partly-cloudy-partly-fuckoff - Aetherborn Angel

This is one I didn’t see coming, but not in abad way. This feels like a natural name, and immediately conjures an image in my mind. The fact that both angels and aetherborn are sort of non-natural creatures makes he combination feel fitting, but them being opposites of the color pie and origin intrigues me. The card? It feels alright. Artifact matters seems pretty aetherborn-y, though that’s mostly just because they're in Kaladesh. Counters feel pretty angelly, but that’s usually just because white has +1/+1 counter themes all the time and big white creatures are often angels. What I’m trying to say is that while this does feel like it’s an aetherborn angel, it doesn’t feel like it’s THE aetherborn angel. But I still think the card has a place in whatever set it’s for. It seems powerful, and I like that it’s usually the best place to put your counters, but has some utility, plus I’m sure there are ways to go infinite, but when you’re paying seven mana for it that seems fair. I love powerful commons because there’s nothing saying a common can’t be powerful, just not complex, and while this does add a little strategic complexity, it’s not gonna burn any brains. This is a well made card.

@reaperfromtheabyss​ - Goblin Knight

It sure is. This feels pretty right on the money, not just because the name feels real and the creature types fit well, but because the text on the card feels like how a goblin would be a knight. They aren’t particularly any better at fighting or better equipped, but it at least can scare some people or keep them at a distance. I very rarely ever say this but I think there was room for flavor text here. I’d like to know how this goblin got in this position, and what they’re doing to stop creatures from blocking. The cost also seems great, perfectly in between fervent cathar and voldaren duelist.

@shootingstarhunter​ - Island Turtle [the 0/4]

One of two island turtles this week. So it’s a 0 mana 0/4 (or U if you count coming into play tapped as paying a cost). I think with literally no other text, that would be a pretty cool card, if a touch strong. There’s also the issues with land creatures, which there are some weird rules for that mostly just annoys judges more than players. However, you decided to put on some… interesting text. It can turn another land into a creature, one with a little bit more power and toughness. That seems… okay? I think if it had just said something like “Adapt 1: sacrifice a land” it would be almost identical mechanically but far, far easier to understand. I think you made this card to fit a very specific idea you had in your head, but I think you needed to step back and look at the final card and see if there was some way to make it simpler, or if not, what that extra complexity would get you.

@snugz​ - Island Turtle [the 0/2]

Interesting. I like the simplicity of it on the surface. It’s just a Dryad Arbor but with a little more toughness, and it’s blue. A 0 mana 0/2 is on curve, I think, though I don’t know what kind of deck would want it. It doesn’t block anything but the smallest of creatures, which decks you’d need to block against probably aren’t playing. But it can chump, and doesn’t die to 1 damage from stuff like Chandra Pyromaster or Goblin Chainwhirler, so that’s something. The reminder text is appreciated, though the “isn’t a spell” feels less necessary considering the first line, but reminder text can be there anyway! The first line I feel like is trying to fix something, but most of the issues with land creatures are about integrating them into the comprehensive rules, which Dryad Arbor is already forcing WotC to do. But I guess it has it’s uses here and there. Rules aside, I think this card is fine. Like I said, I’m not sure what decks would want this, but it’s unique enough I think someone could find a use for it.

@starch255​ - Enchantment Class Saga

Oh boy, what did I do to deserve this? First, the elephant in the room, no one at wizard’s would ever call this Enchantment Class Saga. Is it supposed to be the story of a class about enchantments? Mechanically I guess it’s at least tied to everything. I don’t think I have to tell you this is too complicated. This has more words on it than a pack of homelands. I also don’t know if it’s phrased right, because we don’t even have the comprehensive rules for classes out yet. Setting X to a certain number at the top of the card also may or may not work? We’ve yet to see a saga with a static effect like that. I also think just playing it and waiting till turn four to level it up gives you a crazy amount of advantage, digging 4 cards deep every turn if you have another saga, plus getting through those sagas even quicker. I’m having an extremely difficult time judging this one, but I can at least say it’s too complicated, and that’s enough to keep it out of the running.

@thedirtside - Treasured Clue

This is a really cute card, but I don’t think it quite hits the mark (pun intended?). One mana for a treasure is kind of weird. We saw a lot of people thinking like that for a while with golden goose, which generated a mana on turn one and rarely did anything else, but let you ramp out a three-drop on turn two, and doing this on a colorless card just feels kind of dangerous, especially because being common means you could crack two on turn three for a 5 drop two turns early. But I also like the combination of the two types, since if you don’t need the treasure then you probably need the card. Reminds me of the Horizon lands. The name is also really close, better than some this week, but feels kind of forced. I wish there were a little more you could do with this guy to make him worth tacking on an extra mana. As is, it’s just a little too swingy to be fun.

@wolkemesser​ - Orgg Hag

I actually had to double check to see that these were both existing creature types, but lo and behold, they were. And they’re both pretty thematic! Orggs are just like big 4 armed goblins, and hags are I guess like witches? But now witches are warlocks. Anyway, the card. I think it’s alright. Trample feels very Orgg, lifelink feels haggy, but that last ability just seems odd. Orgg itself had an ability that cared about size, and the sort of curse flavor of it feels haggy, but it just feels so out of nowhere. I feels like if you removed the white mana in the cost and the ability it would feel just as appropriate a card. Humility in general also has a lot of rules issues that don’t really make them worth it unless they are on big, swingy cards, which this isn’t quite. Still as a whole I think the card is perfectly fine, but a bit off for this week’s contest.

~

And that’s everybody! If you want to get a hold of me, you can contact me on the Discord. Thanks again for entering! Good luck next week!

-Mod Mr. ShinyObject

[sleepyfan-blog]

Dealing with mortal morons

a request from discord

warnings: dysphoria, transphobia

Nightmare cursed a little bit as he caught sight of his body in the mirror as he ran for his clothes. His pajama top had come undone a little in the night and he could feel the extra weight on his chest from… From… No don’t think about that! Pressing heavily against him. He stared at his clothes, a frown appearing on his face as he frantically went through him. All of them felt… Wrong, somehow. They were the wrong color, or the shape of the clothes accented the curves that he hated that he had.

The patterns were all wrong, and Nightmare sunk down to the bottom of his closet, pressing his hands over his face and sobbing quietly as he struggled to suppress the feeling that he was wrong. There was something bad-wrong-broken about him and he… He wished that it would go away. The weight on his chest felt crushing and he hated how soft and round his face was.

There was a light knock on the door, and a light voice called out “Lady Nightmare, is there something wrong?”

“I… I’m not… I’m not a lady!” Nightmare yelled back, hating the way that his voice cracked and rose in pitch from what he was usually able to keep his voice at normally. The voice that he one day wanted to have.

The person behind the door huffed a little “I don’t care what you believe you are, Guardian of Negativity, but you are to get dressed immediately. His royal highness an-”  The servant yelped as a burst of warm, familiar energy appeared out of nowhere.

Dream’s voice rang out strong and clear “Leave Nighty alone! He is very upset right now, and I’m sure that being around all of you hasn’t helped at all! The mortal has run off… Please let me in? I’m guessing that they’ve given you all the wrong clothes to wear…”

“You… You came for me.” Nightmare breathed, his eyes widening a bit in shock as he ran as fast as his wobbly legs could manage, scrambling to undo the spells that he’d placed on the door, to keep the servants and anyone else from bothering him. He’d been dragged to this miserable place, as the so-called King of Dreamtale wanted to be seen conferring with the emotive guardians - and hadn’t wanted to come to their sacred tree- which they weren’t supposed to leave for more than a few hours - and he’d been kidnapped in the night three days ago.

“Of course I did. I’ve also brought some proper clothes, a binder and one of those illusion pendants to make sure that your body looks the way that you need it too.” Dream responded, a gentle smile appearing on his face as he immediately handed the other the magical item and bit of underwear for his other half to take. Dream wished that he hadn’t lost track of time when his beloved had been kidnapped - as otherwise they’d have been able to repel the mortal force without issue.

Nightmare quickly put on the binder, shifting it so that it wouldn’t pinch his ribs much, some of the weight lifting a little. Still, he couldn’t look down at himself, as the feeling of being trapped in the wrong body - or that he was somehow broken (in addition to being called… Called by the wrong pronouns since he’d been first grabbed). As soon as he felt the illusion spell take hold, he risked a glance down and… “Oh thank the stars, I’m feeling… I’m feeling a bit better already… What clothes did you bring?”

Dream immediately pulled out three of his other half’s favorite casual outfits out of his inventory - along with two others with over-large sweaters that were soft and comfy, if that was what Nightmare would rather wear. “What would you like?”

“I… I don’t…” Nightmare stared at the options, feeling the room spin a little as he staggered forwards, having some difficulty breathing. The heaviness was back, as well as the awful, trapped feeling that made him want to claw at himself until there was nothing left.

Dream rushed forwards, and his voice was calm - though his aura was a little panicky, filled with equal parts worry and fury “Nightmare, may I hug you? You can say no, if you want to.” He wanted so desperately to bring his other half into a tight hug, pressing loving kisses to the other’s face and lips and promise that he’d make sure that no one would ever hurt him like this as long as he drew breath… But he knew that it wouldn’t help and… Sometimes touch made things worse for his beloved.

“I… I want to get dressed first…” Nightmare decided, staring at the clothes, before pointing at the navy jeans, black shirt and dark blue hoodie “That one… And you even grabbed my favorite pair of shoes… Aww�� Uhm… I don’t mean to be mean but… Why did it take you three days to find me?”

“The villagers lied about what direction you’d been taken in. Then I tried for about three hours to let the guards to let me in - I’m not in my guardian outfit. When they wouldn’t listen to me I knocked them out and… Had to fight the oncoming shift. We should probably get going before half the castle comes in for us. Not that we couldn’t take these mortal idiots, but they’ll somehow twist things into you being some sort of shape-shifting demon again and if I hear that one more time, that person is getting stabbed.”

“Dream, your weapon is a staff.” Nightmare pointed out, a small smile on his face as he quickly got dressed, once again feeling so grateful that he had such a supportive and loving mate.

“And? You’re saying that as if it’s impossible to stab someone with a staff. It’s a blunt weapon… But that just means that it would hurt more when I actually managed to stab them.” The positive guardian growled, pacing back and forth as both of them could sense the approaching horde of idiots.

“Okay, I’m dressed… And I… I know that you’re close to knocking more heads together for me… But I’d rather just go home, if… If you don’t mind?” Nightmare suggested. He still felt vulnerable and out of sorts, and wanted to go home and hug his beloved until he felt like himself again.

Dream nodded, his golden eyes warm and full of care - the other’s aura was still showing his unsettled and protective emotions, but that didn’t bother Nightmare very much. “Alright… Let’s get out of here. As I’m sure you’ve figured out, there’s an anti-teleportation field around the castle and the city around it… But as soon as we’re clear of the city, we should be free to get home immediately.”

Nightmare nodded, a small smile appearing on his face “So how are we going to get out of here?”

“Out the window of course.” Dream responded with a bright grin as he grabbed one of his beloved’s hands and rushing over to the window - smashing the stained glass clear with a foot “I hid a couple of horses closeby, so we don’t have to run very far.”

“This is a third story window, and as far as I remember, neither of us can fly-aaaaaah! Dreaaaam!” Nightmare yelped as the other dragged him out the window, summoning his staff, as it lengthened, the pair of thems sliding down the magical weapon to land lightly on the grass.

“See? I told you I had an exit for us.” Dream grinned, pressing a light kiss to one of his beloved’s cheeks before continuing to run, half-dragging his husband behind him before Nightmare unfroze from the shock and ran alongside him.

“You idiot! That could have been very dangerous! What if the staff hadn’t extended to the length that we needed it! We might be more or less immortal, but that doesn’t mean that we aren’t immune to damage. We could have both gotten seriously hurt. And then captured.” Nightmare scolded, frowning darkly at his idiot husband, smacking the other on the back of the head, the worry making him very snappy.

“I would have healed you and told you where the horses were, so that you could escape. I’d have healed myself and followed after you as soon as I could, Nightmare.” Dream responded steadily, as if the answer were readily obvious to him.

“As if I would just abandon you to these mortal fools.” Nightmare growled “I’d wait until you healed yourself - probably carrying your injured dumb ass until you were able to walk again and we’d escape together, even if it meant that we slowed down for a bit.”

Dream ducked his head a little and nodded meekly, murmuring softly “I… Sorry. I didn’t mean to imply anything. Sorry for taking a risk, I just… There were at least a dozen mortals headed our way and at least half of them had magic enough to put up a fight from what I could sense and I just… I want to get home with you as soon as I can.”

“Good. Are we getting close to the horses yet?” The negative guardian asked - he had a dozen different thoughts in mind, and his ribs were starting to hurt from all of the running, but like hell was he going to complain.

“We’re nearly there.” Dream responded, bringing up the hand that wasn’t firmly holding one of his beloved’s and letting out a piercing whistle. A pair of black and white spotted horses came cantering out of nowhere and came to a stop in front of them. “Let’s go - I know a horse-friendly path through the city. Hopefully we can make it through before the city guards are alerted to try to stop us.”

Nightmare nodded, guessing that Dream had either stolen or charmed these horses from someone - as the saddles were made of fine leather that looked brand new, and the horses moved with a quick, trained speed that spoke to someone spending a lot of time and money on them. Not that the negative spirit particularly cared.

~

One harrowing gallop through a surprisingly large mortal city later (it was several dozen times bigger than the small village that lived near their Tree) both of the guardians managed to cross through the main gate out of the city, hunched low over the horses. They continued to gallop across the countryside, as both of them could sense the magical wards that extended surprisingly far.

A commanding voice yelled “Halt in the name of King -”

“We don’t give a fuck. We bow are heads to no mortal, no matter how important they believe themself to be. Leave us alone and we won’t cause any problems.” Nightmare called out as the horses came to an abrupt halt. He leapt off of the horse, followed closely by Dream as the pair of them continued to run - just a short sprint and they would be free to head home.

“It was awfully rude of you to run out on me, La-” A smooth, amused voice called out.

Dream cut the arrogant human off with a growl as he whirled around, summoning his staff and extending it so that one of the pointed stars struck the bastard square in the temple, knocking the other from his force as the pair of guardians backed away from them “Leave us be. You have no right to interfere with us, nor the Tree of Feelings. If you refuse, we will see you as a threat to be eliminated with deadly force.”

There was an uproar from the uppity mortals’ group of minions, but as they fussed and flailed, Dream and Nightmare ran, the pair of them teleporting home the moment they were free of the spelled lands.

[canadian-riddler]

Catwoman’s Revenge Redux

By Indiana

  Characters: Selina Kyle, Edward Nygma [lowkey Riddlecat]

Synopsis: I hate the Catwoman’s Revenge DLC so I rewrote it. In my version they have ~history~.

 AO3

She’d expected better security from him.

It seemed he had been banking on this place being kept secret enough he didn’t really have to put resources into defending it.  A handful of chatty thugs was not hard to get through, and the riddle, while annoying, was not impossible.  And now she was about to make it evident how very wrong he had been.

As she exited the elevator she stepped directly onto a bridge overlooking what was, she had to admit, quite an impressive underground factory.  He never had done anything halfway, and this was no exception.  It was a little dingy, and he could have used some decorating tips, but for a secret facility beneath an existing structure it was not too shabby at all.  She froze for a moment when she heard him speak.  Wasn’t he supposed to be in prison?

“Computer?  It is I, the Riddler!”

“Hello The Riddler, you sound very smart today.”

“Thank you, computer.  But this is a matter most exigent.”

“Error.  Do not understand ‘exigent’.”

Who had let that man near a phone?  And why was he allowed to call his computer, of all things?  

“It means urgent.  Now –“

“Thank you.”

“Yes!  You’re welcome.  Now, the Gotham City Police Department currently has me immured.  And – “

“Error.  Do not understand ‘immured’.”

He sighed heavily in exasperation.  “It means imprisoned!  Confined!  Incarcerated! Banged up!”  She could almost hear him rubbing his forehead.  “I don’t know which is more corrupt, the prison-industrial complex or your vocabulary files.”

“Thank you.”

“I – you’re welcome.  Now.  I believe this would be a most felicitous and appurtenant time to run the jailbreak protocol.”

“Error.  Do not understand ‘run’.”

“Oh, for…”  He trailed off into fatigued silence.  “Run vocabulary diagnostics.”

“Error.  Do not understand ‘run’.”

“That’s what I get for hoping voice recognition would work over the phone… very well.  Stay on the line.  I will execute it myself by using the keys on this phone to write lines of code.”

She had no doubt he actually could run a computer using even the old-model phones at the GCPD, but she was going to have to stop him right there, no matter how impressive and amusing that might be.  She climbed over the railing on the bridge and dropped to the factory floor.  “Hey, Eddie…”

“C… Catwoman?”

“The one and only.” She took a cursory look around. “Aren’t you in prison?”

“Ha!  No prison can hold me.  One moment.”  His voice faded somewhat.  “Yes, Officer Cash, I’m talking to my lawyer. Who else would I be calling?”

Who else indeed.

“Calm down, Eddie.  No need to order a breakout.  Here’s what’s going to happen.”  She raised her voice to ensure he got all the details.  “I’m going to steal all your money and destroy everything you’ve built here.  Okay?”

“Selina, sweetheart,” he began, and she had to admit he could still turn on that charm when he wanted to.  “Let’s not be hasty about this.”

“Eddie, baby,” she returned, “I don’t think you’re in a position to tell me what to do.”

“Telling?  Who’s telling?  I am merely suggesting we renegotiate the deal.  There’s no need to rush into this.”

“I never said we were making a deal.”  She cast a careful eye around for anything that looked as though it might hold a trap.  “I am here to take what’s mine, whether you want me to or not.  And that’s no suggestion, sweetheart.”

“Listen.”  He had dropped the cloying tone altogether now, which was enough to give her pause. “There’s something down there that is of extreme import to me.  You would not understand if I attempted to explain it to you, so I am asking you to trust –“

“Trust?” she snapped.  “You listen, Eddie.  I did trust you.  That’s why we’re here in the first place, remember?  You lied to me.  You tricked me into being a pawn in your sad little game.  You owe me and I am here to make sure you pay up.  You don’t get to negotiate.  You took advantage of me.”  She hardened her tone.  “I thought you were better than that.”

Silence.  Then: “Wait a minute.  Did you say ‘Selina’, Nygma?”

“I did not!” Edward snapped.  “I said ‘Sabrina’!  She’s my lawyer.  You can call her yourself when I’m finished.  She’ll have a few choice words for you, this I guarantee.”  He must have given Cash another moment to leave, because he didn’t speak for a good handful of seconds.  Then he continued, in a lower voice, “All right.  You have a point.  But I’m serious.  There’s… something down there that cannot be replaced if you destroy it.”

“I’m not all that inclined to believe you right now.”

“Selina.”  He actually sounded… upset.  He might just have been telling the truth.  “Please.”

Well.  She wasn’t heartless.  She could give him something for his trouble.

“I’ll make you a deal. I’m still going to destroy this factory and clean out your bank account, but in return I will provide you some intel. You’ll be able to make your escape without needing this malfunctioning computer of yours, and I’ll still get what I want.  Interested?

“There’s no way for me to get you to leave the factory standing.”

“No.”

He sighed again.  “You do know it took me six months of building with my bare hands to put that together.”

“And you did a great job. Unfortunately, it’s time to say goodbye. Tell me what I need to know or I’m returning to the GCPD and leaving them a little tip telling them exactly where your remaining hideout is so they can destroy it themselves.”

“Oh… don’t do that.”

“Take it or leave it.”

“Fine!  Fine. But there is a security system in place that I cannot disengage from here.  You’re going to have to survive long enough that –“

“Survive?”

“There is a small army of Riddlerbots dedicated to protecting the server.  I cannot call them off without access to a computer.  I have nothing to gain by lying to you.”

“You did risk my life, remember?”

“Selina, my dear,” he said, surprisingly softly, “do you really believe I thought for a moment he would fail to come to your rescue?”

He always sounded so chivalrous when he called her that.

“I honestly can’t tell what you’re thinking anymore.”

“You’re not the only one.”  He said something over his shoulder she couldn’t hear, then continued: “In any event, as soon as you attempt to open the door through which the computer can be found, the combat Riddlerbots will automatically deploy.  I cannot deactivate them from here.”

“So if I manage to destroy your so-called small army, you will open the server room and allow me to conduct my business?”

A pause, and then he said, “I will.”

“I was expecting you to remind me about my offer.”  She advanced towards the door, mentally preparing herself for yet another altercation with his cursed bots.  “Since you didn’t, I will tell you just as soon as I’ve dealt with your little security detail.  And any help you are able to provide will be duly noted.”  

“Very well.”

As soon as she laid a hand on the door there came discord from behind her, and she turned to see a goodly number of the bots had already appeared.  He hadn’t been kidding.  She resigned herself to the inevitable and got started.

“That’s a mighty long phone call, Nygma.”

“I have a very nice lawyer who likes to ask how I’m doing. You should try it sometime.  Oh, I’m sorry, I forgot: you can’t carry on an intelligent conversation.  My apologies. I’ll leave you to your brutish threats.”

She was going to have to hurry this along.  She wasn’t going to be able to get into the server room without his help, and he was likely to get his phone call revoked sooner rather than later.  “Eddie!”

“What?”

“You need to stay on the line long enough to fulfill our deal!  You might want to keep your commentary to yourself, hm?”  She caught one of the machines around the arm with her whip and wrenched it to the floor.

“I have been putting in some work on my end, you know.  It’s difficult to write programs on a handset while under such close scrutiny, but you’ll be pleased to know I’ve managed it.  You might even want to congratulate me, or at least pretend to be grateful.  In any event, you’re going to have to get off the floor.”

“And what would that do, exactly?”  Her heel connected with the neck of a bot with a satisfying crunch.

“It would keep you from being electrocuted, for one thing. But if you’re into that, that’s fine too.  If you aren’t, you have approximately eleven seconds before I roast you where you stand.”

She climbed back up onto the wall, directing her whip at any robots who dared follow her.  “Oh come on, Eddie.  You wouldn’t do that              .”

The floor lit up with a sudden green intensity and all of the Riddlerbots upon it were instantly decimated in a spray of smoke and sparks.  “No?”

“You’d miss me too much,” she told him, and he actually laughed.  

“That I would, my dear, for whom else could I count on to upend my life when least I need it?  You may abscond from your perch now.  That should be all of them.”

“Should be?”

“I can’t exactly see.”

She jumped lightly down onto the floor, and when it did not spark to life again and no further robots were revealed she crossed the floor to the hidden room.  The locking mechanism was denoted by a large question-mark shaped switch and a massive glowing green arrow at which she rolled her eyes.  “Eddie.”

“Yes, darling.”

“Why did you put an arrow pointing at the access point to your own computer?  Did you think you’d forget where it was?”

“You aren’t here to critique my décor.  Press the button and I will provide the verbal confirmation.”

She put her hand to it and depressed it, but he remained silent.  She frowned over her shoulder.  “Eddie.”

“Apologies for the delay.”  She couldn’t tell if Cash had returned or if he just needed a moment before handing over the keys to his palace, as it were.  “Computer: Tesla.”

And with that the door opened, and she stepped beyond it to reveal a very large monitor mounted behind a desk that had been hastily cut out of a large piece of wood.  On this desk were only a dismantled robot and an empty mug. She moved to the keyboard.  “Do I need a password for this too?”

“No.  It will have logged in automatically.  You will require one each for the bank transfer and for the… self-destruct.” She heard him take a breath.  “Listen carefully to my instructions.”

She did exactly as he told her, and she had to admit she would not have been able to get into his account without his guidance.  It was well-encrypted, with a vendor she had never heard of.  “It needs a password to complete the transaction,” she said, once she had set it up.

“I’m finding it difficult to believe your lawyer is keeping you on the line this long,” Selina heard Cash say.  “She usually prefers to meet you in person.  I wouldn’t be able to guess why.”

“Will you leave me alone!?” Edward snapped.

“I’m coming right back, Nygma,” Cash warned, “and if you are still on that phone it is not going to be pretty.”

“Fine!  Just let me finish my phone call in peace!”  He sighed directly into the phone and said, more calmly, “It’s Lovelace.”

It was going to take a minute or two for such a massive transaction to be approved, so she had time to fulfill her end of the deal.  “You ready for that intel?”

“Go ahead.”

“The GCPD confiscated your mech suit from the Orphanage.  You won’t believe what they did with it.”

“They gave it to the Bat for his trophy room?” he said with derision.

She laughed.  “Even better.  It’s in the GCPD’s trophy room.”

Silence.  

It brought her back to a time when she had been able to feel the chill of it, and she was quickly sobered.

“If this is a joke, Selina, I am as far from amused as can be.” His tone was hard, and she remembered that stony look he used to give her when she teased some of his more unusual qualities.  She shook her head despite it not being visible to him.

“I’m not joking.  They put it in there as part of their exhibit. It’s just sitting there, out in the open.  It’s yours to ride off into the sunset with.”

“You’re serious.”

“Yes.”

“That is the most idiotic thing I have ever heard,” he said, but he sounded more tired than angry. “Thank you.”

“The transfer is done.” She placed her hands back on the keyboard.  “And the self-destruct?”

“Must you really?” he asked quietly.

“We had a deal.  You don’t let me do it, I send someone here to do it anyway.”  Whatever it was he was trying so hard to preserve he could probably replace.  He always had been possessive over his things.

“All right.”  He coughed away from the receiver.  He really was still smoking, by the sound of it.  “Control R, and then run endif.exe.”

She did so.  “And this password is?”

He didn’t answer immediately.  She almost changed her mind.  Almost.

“Turing,” he finally told her, so hushed she almost didn’t hear it.  “You’ll have three minutes.”

“Thank you.”  And she stepped out of the room and walked quickly towards the elevator.

“Guess what?” came Cash’s voice over the line.  “I just called your lawyer.”

“You can have the phone if you want it so much,” Edward said snidely.  “I’ve finished with it.”

“Finished what?  You were there so long you were probably rigging it into a bomb.  I’ve been authorised to use force to get you to cooperate.  So I suggest you shut your mouth and come with me.”

“What?” Edward protested.  “I didn’t even do anything, you Neanderthal!  Can’t a man make a phone call in peace?”

“Watch your tone, Nygma.”

“You touch me with that and it is going straight back to my lawyer, do you understand?  You have no legal stature to assault me when I-“ He cried out suddenly following the sound of an electric sizzling, and as the elevator reached the upper floor she had to wince in sympathy.  He hadn’t really deserved that.

She missed him sometimes. It had been so long ago now, but she didn’t think she’d ever forget how it felt to press her nose into his neck as he slept, or how comforting his arm used to feel around her waist, or how he would smile at her when he came home from yet another unfulfilling day at the GCPD. And she would always remember, too, the unmitigated rages he would fly into without a moment’s notice over nothing at all, and the nights he would wake up and cry for hours without ever telling her why, and the times that look would come over his face and he would just disappear even though he was right there.  The good times?  She missed those.  They had almost made the bad times worth it.  But she had known, just known, that it was only going to get worse.  As if to prove her regrettably right, six months after she left she found that he had vanished from the GCPD.   A year and a half after that he was in Blackgate, soon to be transferred to Arkham Asylum.  She had made the right choice.  He had been too much for her, was probably too much for anyone.  But the regret went hand in hand with the nostalgia, and the wondering whisper that asked, Would he be different if…?

She looked back at the toy store which hid the ruins of the factory below it, and considered how long it would take him to make his escape.  A few days, more or less.  Maybe she would go back after.  Ask him just what it was he’d been so eager to protect, when he had the time to explain it. He’d been surprisingly rational about the whole thing: no excuses, no threats, no real protest, even.  He had accepted his wrongdoing and met her demands. It was… odd.  Like he’d had a change of heart, almost.

Now just what could have caused that?

She had thought she’d feel more triumphant after doing this, but no.  It was not all that satisfying to destroy what little he’d had left.  All of his structures had already been torn down, his base of operations liberally draped in yellow police tape.  Even taking his money was an empty victory; he was much too paranoid to keep all of it in one place like that.  She had merely relieved him of a drop in his bucket, most likely.

And she’d never given him an explanation for her disappearance all those years ago.  Maybe she’d check up on him in a few and see where they stood.  Scarecrow was gone, but there had been rumours and she had not heard from Bruce in two weeks, nor had anyone else she knew.  There was something brewing in the city, something different.  Being allied with the Riddler just might get her out of it unscathed.  And maybe she’d get an old friend back.  Maybe.

But it was best not to get too hopeful these days.  

 Author’s note

I haven’t listened to it recently because I forget stuff like *snap* and it allows me to revisit content like I almost never heard it before, but the audio files between Catwoman and Riddler in Arkham Knight have Selina doing what Eddie wants preeeeeeeetty much without protest. Selina’s not dumb, she’s been in Gotham a long time and she’s surely watched the Riddler slowly go more and more nuts over the years.  She’s consorting with an insane supercriminal – who she remarks upon as being completely nutso in the last audio – who has been upping the stakes continually, and she just goes along with that for the monies?  Mmmmmmmm not buying it.  It puts her firmly on the side of ‘not being a good guy’, that’s for sure.  In general they get along pretty well too.

Anyways so I haven’t written it yet but they used to be a Thing when Eddie worked at the GCPD circa Arkham Origins and he had not yet learned to hide/contain his mess of a self.  They were both in their early twenties.

As for the Rids part, his dialogue in the DLC completely ruins all the exquisite character development of the actual game and the only part I like is the part where he’s polite to the computer even though it’s annoying him.  There’s NO WAY the Riddler just randomly left his computer unlocked, or puts his bank account ON HIS DESKTOP, or has a one-click SELF DESTRUCT SEQUENCE.  This is a cyber security specialist AND genius who hacks Batman for funsies, gimme a break.  I can buy the voice recognition not working over the phone, but then randomly working again without a keyword to activate it?  Nah.  And there is indeed an electrified floor during the very boring ‘hit two hundred robots’ boss fight in the DLC but he never turns it on because…………………… he likes having his stuff stolen and blown up, IDK.  And yes.  The mech really is just sitting there at the GCPD, out in the open.  Waiting for someone to steal it.

[ourpyrrhicvictory-archive]

headcanon 001. | boggart | f. longbottom. 

Shadows danced across the walls around him, the cool air filtering in through the adjacent window and crawling along his bare back to gently kiss his neck. The only shadow that remained still was the one across his jaw, eager stubble peppering fair skin in retaliation against his negligence.

The voices he had been straining to hear from the kitchen had silenced, a distant pop echoing through the home via open windows shortly thereafter. He paid it no mind, hands hovering in front of him so as to maintain absolute peace in the immediate vicinity of the house of cards he'd been constructing. Even when the door to his room was pushed ajar behind him, his gaze did not waver. He'd always had a knack for multitasking.

"There will be quite a few changes when you head back to school on the first."

"So I've heard."

"You were listening."

"I heard."

Augusta's lips curled into a knowing smile. His did as well although she couldn't see it. It fell long before she could move forth to. It wasn't that he'd meant to be rude, but the urgency of the voices in the kitchen had drawn his attention. As of late, when Professor McGonagall stopped in for tea, it was never idle conversation. Augusta didn't much like idle conversation... Come to think of it, none of the Longbottoms did.

"Did she say why?"

"She doesn't know why."

"She knows why. She just can't tell us."

Because Dumbledore would certainly tell McGonagall. Frank didn't push it any further, ever so cautiously placing the final two cards atop the structure with bated breath before he stepped away as though he feared it would explode. He still sometimes managed to forget that muggle playing cards didn't do that.

Reaching over to the bedside drawer, he raised the needle from the record player, a faint acoustic guitar coming to an abrupt halt and allowing a silence to befall the room. A gentle breeze followed from the open window, Frank's solid form the only obstruction now protecting the flimsy castle on the desk. It wouldn't last long. Nothing ever did.

"Did she say what?"

"She doesn't know what."

"Now that I believe."

His mother's brow raised, and he reckoned it was due to his nonchalance. The fact of the matter was that Frank wasn't all too surprised. Something had been bound to happen. With tensions rising and his father's growing workload, it were as if the wizarding world were ready to implode, and Frank was not some naive child who opted to believe that peace would rule out. No, all that he was now was EAGER. For what, he couldn’t be sure.

It had manifested the year before in the lesson plans of their professors, the more advanced magic, the cautionary tales and devout lectures leading up to their OWLs. Discord had loomed like a dark cloud over the end of term, and although Hogwarts was said to be the safest place on Earth, recruitment within its walls for both sides could not be snuffed out.

"I reckon that means some excitement, yeah?" he grinned at last, pressing his lips to the woman's forehead before he moved towards the closet for a shirt. "I wonder if Dad knows anything. I bet he does. Besides, I should go and tell him that the match against Wimbourne was cancelled. I heard on the-  "

"Right now? I do think your father has quite a bit on his plate, Frank. Perhaps you should wait until he comes home."

"He should be about finished, yeah? I'll just meet him, and we can come home together."

"...I do think it's best if you wait, son. He won't be long anyway, right?"

He didn't answer right away, the clench of his jaw shielded from his mother's eyes by a t-shirt. Once upon a time, going to work with his father was a commonality, something that wasn't to be scheduled or questioned. It simply WAS. If Frank was up early enough, he tagged along. When he was old enough to travel on his own, he visited the old man when he saw it fit. Now, it were as if the Ministry had become some dark and insidious place he wasn't meant to cross into under normal circumstances.

"Yeah, I suppose you're right," He agreed, voice neutral as he shut his window, extending the life of his prized structure by at least a few more hours until some nosy pet in the house decided its fate. "I wanted to fly a bit today anyway, break in the new broom."

Augusta's small sigh gave Frank great pleasure. "Yes, the broom, and just when I was certain the last one was fast enough to fly out from right under you."

"You worry too much, Mum."

"I'd like to think so. Oh, before you go out, can you search for something up in the attic for me? Your sister swears her old knick knacks are still up here."

A roll of his eyes was followed by an obedient nod. "All right, sure."

"Thank you, darling."

It was the lone journey up to the attic that allowed his mind to run rampant, steps languid as he twirled his wand in his fingers. Always keep it near you. You'll never know when you'll need it. You'll never know when it'll be worth breaking the law. His father's position in the ministry had been enough to put his mother on edge long ago, and he knew where they stood in matters of risk. Purebloods who forgot they were purebloods. TRAITORS. Even in the halls of his school, he sensed the venom, and long ago, he didn't much care for it, but now, he was acutely aware of it at all times. It MEANT something now.

Yet he'd always been the instigator, hadn't he? He created the worst possible scenarios in his head, a way to constitute his suspicions so as to later plan his quest for valor. What was a soldier without a battle to partake in, a war to wage, a desire to FIGHT? Sometimes he feared that he YEARNED for war, longed for the pandemonium it spawned if only to have something for his hands to do. Did that make him brave, or did that make him MAD?

Perhaps both.

The Longbottom attic may have been the only part of the house encased in pure mayhem, and that was only because Jonas had long since forbidden his wife from climbing up here. Frank was certain his father had a few things up here he didn't want his mother dabbling in, but he also worried for the woman's intense need to put everything in order. If she does that, we'll never find anything again.

The first half hour of his search was nothing but mindless rifling through random boxes, the boy forgetting what it was he was looking for to start with. And who could blame him? The longer he was alone, the easier it became to cultivate his curiosity. And become thoroughly distracted by what exactly had happened at Hogwarts that had Dumbledore himself worried.  

No tangible thought stuck however, each idea more absurd than the last, and perhaps he wasn't taking it seriously enough, but he certainly didn't see the point. Men wage war, but it is children who fight and die. And so Frank was no fool. He knew he would never be worthy of answers as long as he was a student, especially if his parents weren't either. He wondered how much his father would know about it, or rather, how many lies he'd be forced to tell Frank and Augusta within the span of an hour when he arrived home. Frank always knew, and he never asked twice.

When he'd kicked aside the wooden box, hearing it crash to the floor behind him, he'd only been concerned with listening for Augusta's shriek up the stairs, asking him if he was wrestling ghouls up there. When it didn't come, he continued his inspection of the box labels piled in the corner, oblivious to the eerie silence which had taken shelter in the space around him.

It's this thing about fears. Everyone is so certain they understand their own, that they grasp the root and have the ability to weed them out like lawn gnomes. Someone asks "What are you afraid of?", and although you don't say it aloud, the answer comes to mind with unyielding haste. You KNOW what you're afraid of. That's the stigma that comes with fear, and so when a board behind him creaked, causing him to whip around, the scene that met Frank was not immediately a manifestation of fear. It was just absurd.

It was like looking into a mirror. The cliche didn't register. He refused to allow it to register, but the statement had never been more fitting than it was now. He was staring at his dark t-shirt, his dark eyes, the shadows cast across his face by the circular window to his right... or his left? Something wasn't clicking up in that brain of his, the calculation in his eyes betraying the confusion he felt in his chest. This wasn't a mirror. This was HIM, and yet, before he could speak, his reflection's wand was raised, aimed at a spot between the real Frank's eyes.

"Avada Kedavra!"

Its mouth never moved, and yet the words could have caused the walls around them to crumble. My card house too. It was a vague statement, a feeble attempt to cling to reality although he'd already dropped to the ground, the attic illuminated in vivid green light, blinding him as he scuttled back across the floorboards. Lips parted, a silent scream lodged in his throat as wide eyes drank in the bodies now littering the attic floor. Glancing up, his reflection now stalked towards him, wand held before it, prepared to try again. Frank nearly stumbled through the door in the floor, arm slipping over the edge so that the boy barely caught himself on the step below. Without caring to get to his feet, he spun around crawling down the first few stairs before turning and kicking the trap door shut with a thud, confining his dark doppelganger to the attic.

"Did you find-"

"They're NOT up there."

His mother's tentative calls were lost to the white noise invading his ears, trembling hands forced into his pockets until he'd made it past the tree line and into the quiet wood behind the house. The bark of the old oak had never been more inviting, Frank's slender form fitting to the crevice of its old body. At last, he breathed, a shuddering breath that caused the rest of his body to tremble in its wake, his eyes shutting for the briefest of moments before they snapped wide open. If he allowed them to remain shut, he was forced to witness the event all over again, and he wasn't certain he was able to do so. Still, it was starting to make sense.

A boggart.

When he had read about boggarts the year prior, Frank had always been so certain that his would take a more mundane form because he was certain he was only capable of more mundane fears. Maybe spiders, maybe banshees, maybe my sister in the morning before her coffee, maybe... maybe snakes. And he'd laugh at the thought because of all of the things they were faced with in this world, of everything going on around them, he found it quite fitting that he would be afraid of animals and insects he could trample with his boots or his sister who would never let anyone harm a hair on his head much less do so herself. He'd never had the chance to see the theory come into fruition of course, but he'd never thought to allow his imagination to spawn beyond that. Yet here he was, moments after being given the chance, and all he could do was gawk at the trees in his line of sight.

It had been him. Without any type of inhuman mutation or outlandish modification, it had been Frank standing in that attic staring back at himself. It had been Frank who had raised his wand and cast the killing curse, allowing the image of lifeless corpses to manifest in the aftermath, an image which was now seared into the inside of his eyelids.

What are you afraid of ? Maybe spiders, maybe snakes... No, what are you afraid of ??? Myself.

The answer was absurd. The mere thought was absurd, and yet, as slow and shallow breaths turned to heavy, labored pants and the shaking in his hands turned to full tremors, he knew then that there could not be a more accurate answer. He was afraid of himself, who he had the capacity to become. The quintessential good guy. That title, which he'd worn like a cape for years, would never be a pardon. Being a hero did not mean you didn't have the capacity to be a villain. Being the good guy did not mean you were incapable of being the bad guy. And to ignore the darkest parts of yourself did not riddle them nonexistent.

Maybe he no longer wished to ignore him.

His elbow ripped across the tree at his back, a roar of frustration colliding with the trunks encircling him. He thought that perhaps the boggart had lied. Was that truly a fear? He didn’t feel so afraid now. Awed, surprised, anxious, but not scared. Was he the good guy? Or was he the weapon? After all, men waged war. It was children who must fight and die.

Now, he found, the only thought he could focus on was the question of whether or not he could actually do it.

[lookingformika-archive-blog]

mika & reese

The Twins: Alison Jane Benally-Ham & Emelia Rose Benally-Ham - “We make each other stronger”

Alison Jane Benally-Ham (AJ) - “I heard your voice through a photograph” 

Name: 

{ A L I S O N } meaning “noble” and “kind”

{ J A N E } meaning “god’s gracious gift”

{ B E N A L L Y – H A M } meaning “unexplained” and “hot”

Gender: 

Female

General Appearance: 

{ eyes } brown

{ hair } brown and wavy

{ height } stands at 5’ 5”

Faceclaim: 

Maia Mitchell

Personality: 

+ risk taker, witty, friendly

- indecisive, stubborn, messy

Special Talents: 

Animation → AJ discovered her ability to animate objects at a youngage. Her twin, Emelia, was scared of something in the closet and asked AJ toget rid of it. After looking around, she saw that it was just a sweater that hadbeen casting a shadow, so AJ told Emelia it was a harmless creature, picturingsomething cute and fluffy. Suddenly, the sweater flew out of the closet andturned into a snake on the floor. Both girls ran out of the room screaming.When Mika went to go check it out, all she found was a green sweater lumped onthe floor.

Photographic Encapsulation → One day, when the twins were abouteleven, Reese and Mike decided to take the girls on a picnic. AJ had seen thatMika brought her camera, so she expressed an interest in photography. Mikajumped at the opportunity for one of her girls to be more like herself. She quicklywent over the basics and handed AJ the camera, telling her to point and click whenshe felt ready. AJ pointed the camera in-between two trees, where a red fox wassleeping. The camera clicked and the fox vanished. Mika blinked a few times, checkedthe camera, then looked back at the spot the fox had just been in, to see ifshe was going crazy. Sure enough, the fox was in the picture and it was…moving?It seemed like the fox was trapped in the photograph. After extensive researchMika discovered that AJ had the ability to trap whatever she’d like in a cameraor photographic device, and there was no way to get them back out. AJ has nevergone near another camera again.  

Who They Like Better: 

Depending on the day, AJ will hang out with different people.When she’s angry, or being stubborn, she tends to avoid her moms and only interactwith Emelia. When she’s feeling rather creative, AJ tends to follow Reesearound the house, which can get complicated, since Emelia is always with Reese.Usually this only leaves Mika, not that Mika is a last resort, AJ loves bothher moms equally, but she wants her share of time with Reese too, but Emeliaalways comes first. At least that’s how AJ feels. That being said, Mika is theone she goes to when she’s feeling spontaneous or needs advice, which is almostall the time. Mika always knows how to add fun to a boring situation. AJ alsoloves to tag along when Mika has to run errands, or when she’s messing aroundin her recording studio, because she loves listening to Mika’s music. One of AJ’sfavorite things is when Mika asks her to help write songs.

Who They Take After: 

It’s pretty easy to tell which twin takes after who, and AJclearly takes after Mika. She wears her heart on her sleeve and she doesn’t tryto hide anything. While, she is a pretty good combination of Reese and Mika’sgood trait, she has way more of Mika’s bad ones. Reese like to call AJ amini-Meeks, even though Reese is her birth mother and they look almost identical.Fortunately for Mika, she has the same dark hair and dark eyes as the rest ofher family, so they all fit in nicely together.

Personal Headcanon: 

After the twins had gotten a bit older, and were able to pourtheir own bowl of cereal, Mika and Reese began to sleep in an extra thirtyminutes or so. One morning, Mika awoke to the sound of discordant guitar strumming.Looking over to find Reese asleep next to her, Emelia asleep in between them,feet almost in Mika’s nose, she knew it had to be AJ. The guitar continued, butthis time it was followed by a soft, high pitched voice. As Mika tiptoed closerto the source, she began to make out the words being sung. “You may say I’m adreamer…” AJ had one of Mika’s old acoustic guitars. She was so focused ontrying to replicate the chords to the song she had seen her mother play manytimes before, that she didn’t hear Mika come in until she sang along to thenext line. “But I’m not the only one.” The two sang along to the song, Mikahelping AJ form the chords, until Reese and Emelia came to join them as well,finishing out the song as a family.

Emelia Rose Benally-Ham - “It’s all only worth as much as the time you put in”

Name: 

{ E M E L I A } meaning “soft”

{ R O S E } meaning “a flower”

{ B E N A L L Y – H A M } meaning “unexplained” and “hot”

Gender: 

Female

General Appearance: 

{ eyes } brown

{ hair } brown and wavy

{ height } stands at 5’ 2”

Faceclaim: 

Bailee Madison

Personality: 

+ wishful, responsible, loyal

- insecure, vulnerable, envious

Special Talents: 

Enhanced Artisan → Much like her mother, Emelia’s powers are artrelated, and from the moment she could pick up a pencil, her art has beenflawless. Not only is Emelia good at sketching, she has the ability to createflawless artwork using any medium. Both Mika and Reese are very proud of herand her special gift. Emelia loves to use it to surprise them with decorationsfor the house or her room. She also loves to paint with Reese, in fact, both ofthem usually have paint on their arms, and brushes in their hair.

Art Manipulation → Emelia loves to manipulate art almost as muchas she likes to create it. However, Reese had to teach her that it’s notappropriate to manipulate someone else’s art. When the twins were little, andeasy to manage in crowded places, Mika and Reese took them to the Louvre inFrance. The girls loved to walk around and see all the artwork. While AJ andMika walked at a normal pace, Reese and Emelia were a few paces behind, reallystudying certain pieces. A few minutes after Mika had walked past Van Gogh’s “TheStarry Night”, Reese gasped. Emelia began to giggle, and Mika went to see whatwas going on. Upon and second look at the painting, Mika noticed the stars wereno longer yellow. “Pink!” Emelia exclaimed, and that they were. Emelia hadmanipulated the stars to be pink. After a few minutes of Reese explaining toEmelia that she couldn’t manipulate Van Gogh’s art, the star returned to theiroriginal shade.

Who They Like Better: 

Ever since she could walk, Emelia follows Reese around like ananxious puppy dog. She copies what Reese does and has even picked up her mannerisms.Emelia very seldom spends alone time with Mika and when she does it’s usuallybecause AJ complained about not hanging out with Reese enough.

Who They Take After: 

Just like AJ is a mini-Mika, Emelia is a mini-Reese. They enjoyall the of the same things, painting, baking, reading, writing, etc. Mika lovesto do some of these things as well, they even do them as a family, but nomatter what it is Emelia associates it with Reese.

Personal Headcanon: 

Because Emelia likes Reese so much, Mika sometimes feels left outaround the house, especially when both girls decide to help Reese bake. Mika iscompletely terrible at baking, she burns everything she touches and Reese neverlets her step foot in the kitchen. But, on one day, Emelia had noticed thatMika looked sad. She had a particularly hard day a work and she just wanted tospend time with her girls, but they were already preoccupied with Reese,baking. Little did Mika know, the cupcakes were for her. Emelia asked Reese ifMomma could help to even though she was awful at baking. Reese laughed and saidit was a great idea. Emelia scurried off, found Mika, and tugged at her arm,dragging her to the kitchen. The night ended on the kitchen floor, flour andfrosting everywhere, half of the cupcakes burnt, black like charcoal, laughterfilling the air.

[english2121]

Discussion Leader 12/5

Karina

Quote #1: “So don’t expect stars in what’s coming: nothing will twinkle, this is opaque material and by its very nature despised by everyone. That’s because this story lacks a cantabile melody. Its rhythm is sometimes discordant. And it has facts. I suddenly fell for facts without literature--facts are hard stones and action is now more interesting to me than thinking, you can’t get away from facts” (Lispector pg. 8).

Question #1: Based on our previous discussion in class how is this quote representative of postmodern literature?

Quote #2: I do not intend for what I’m about to write to be complex, though I’ll have to use the words that sustain you. The story--I determine with false free will--will have around seven characters and I’m obviously one of the more important. I, Rodrigo S.M. An old tale, this, since I don’t want to be all modern and invent trendy words to make myself look original. So that’s why I’ll try contrary to my normal habits to write a story with a beginning, middle and “grand finale” followed by silence and falling rain” (pg. 5).

Question #2: In this quote the narrator, as a writer, shows consciousness of readers and seems to address them directly. In what tone does he seem to address the readers and their needs? Does this quote seem like a criticism of writing and books? If so in what way?

Quote #3: “Now I want to speak of the northeastern girl. This is what I mean: she like a stray dog was guided exclusively by herself.I too, from one failure to the next have reduced myself to myself by at least I want to encounter the world and it’s God. I’d like to add by the way of information about the young girl and myself, that we live exclusively in the present because it is always eternally today and tomorrow will be a today, eternity is a state of things at this very moment” (pg. 10).

Questions #3: Given our discussion of identity in the postmodern period how does the narrator touch upon this topic in this quote? How does he touch upon collective vs. individual relationship? What may he mean when he says “eternity is a state of things at this very moment”.

Quote #4: “I’m sure of one thing: this narrative will deal with something delicate: the creation of a whole person who surely is as alive as I am. Take care of her because all I can do is show her so you can recognize her on the street, walking lightly because of her quivering thinness. And what if my narrative is sad? Afterwards I’ll surely write something cheerful, though why cheerful? Because I too am a man of hosannas and someday, perhaps, I’ll sing praises instead of the difficulties of the northeastern girl” (pg. 11).

Question #4: What parallels do you think the narrator is trying to draw between himself and “the northeastern girl”? What if any do you think he might be hoping the readers draw between themselves and the character? For what purpose?

Quote #5: “Nothing in her was iridescent, though the parts of her skin between the blotches had a slight opal glow. Not that it mattered. Nobody looked at her on the street , she was like cold coffee. And that’s how time passed for the girl. She blew her nose on the hem of her underwear. She didn’t have that delicate thing called charm. I’m the only one who finds her charming. Only I, her author lover her. I suffer for her. And I’m the only one who can say this: ‘what do you ask of me weeping that I wouldn’t give you singing? That girl didn’t know she was what she was, just as a dog doesn’t know it’s a dog. So she didn’t feel unhappy. The only thing she wanted was to live. She didn’t know for what, she didn’t ask questions. Maybe she thought there was a little bitty glory in living. She thought people had to be happy. So she was. Before her birth was she an idea? Before her birth was she dead? And after her birth she would die?” (pg.19)

Question #5: How have the narrator’s sentiments towards his character changed in comparison to earlier in the book? Can the narrator’s conflicting sentiments towards his character shed light on the postmodern perspective? How so?

Argument:  The book The Hour of the Star contains many of the same questions and uncertainty that plague postmodernism. It is a book that contains more questions than answers. Through the perspective of the narrator we are made to question what writing is? What life is? Is it possible to truly separate the self from what is written? The narrator claims to love the character he is creating and yet at the same time he speaks of her with much disdain, criticizing and belittling her existence, one which he is creating. The complex relationship between narrator and character seem like an introspective examination of life and an active effort to reconcile the parts of oneself that one loves and hates in order to make sense of it all.

Crystal Williams

Quote #1: “If this story doesn’t exist now, it will. Thinking is an act. Feeling is a fact. Put the two together-I am the one writing what I am writing. God is the world. Truth is always an interior and inexplicable contact. My truest life is unrecognizable, extremely interior and there is not a single word that defines it” (Lispector, 1).

Question #1: What is the connection between the truest-self and God as alluded to by Lispector? How does this relate to the genre of Post Modernism? Consider (if you are aware of Winnicott’s concepts) the notion of the true self and the false self. How does that relate to the act of writing and thinking as described by Lispector?

Quote #2: “How do I know everything that’s about to come and that I myself still don’t know, since I have never lived it? Because on a street in Rio de Janeiro I glimpsed in the air the feeling of perdition on the face of a northeastern girl. Not to mention that I as a boy grew up in the northeast. I also know things about things because I am alive. Everyone alive knows, even if they don’t know they know. So you gentlemen know more than you think and are just pretending not to” (Lispector, 2).

Question #2: What does Lispector allude to the duality of humanity and inherent intelligence and knowledge? Are both men and women endowed with the same intelligence, or is there a common truth, or knowledge that transcends gender?

Quote #3:”Could it really be that the action is beyond the word? But when I write-let things be known by their real names. Each thing is a word and when there is no word it is invented. This is your God who commanded us to invent” (Lispector, 8)”

Question #3: Who or what is God as described by Lispector? What is her connection to God? Would you consider her writing, or writing in general to be a divine act?

Consider: John 1:1 In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God.

Quote #4: “The fact is I hold a destiny in my hands yet don’t feel powerful enough to invent freely: I follow a hidden, fatal line” (Lispector, 12).

Question#4: What is the fatal line that Lispector speaks on? How is it possible for her to feel powerless in a world that she created? Could this apply to us in our daily lives?

Quote #5: In her little superstitious imaginings, she thought that if by any chance she ever got a nice good taste of living- she’d suddenly cease to be the princess she was and be transformed into vermin. Because, no matter how bad her situation, she didn’t want to be deprived of herself, she wanted to be herself. She thought she’d incur serious punishment and even risk dying if she took out too much pleasure in life. So she protected herself from death by living less, consuming so little of her life that she’d never run out. This savings gave her a little security since you can’t fall farther than the ground” (Lispector, 24).

“Clarice Lispector was a great artist; she was also a middle-class wife and mother. If the portrait of the extraordinary artist is fascinating, so is the portrait of the ordinary housewife, whose life is the subject of her stories. As the artist matures, the housewife, too, grows older. When Lispector is a defiant adolescent filled with a sense of her own potential—artistic, intellectual, sexual—so are the girls in her stories. When, in her own life, marriage and motherhood take the place of precocious childhood, her characters grow up, too. When her marriage fails, when her children leave, these departures appear in her stories. When the author, once so gloriously beautiful, sees her body blemished by wrinkles and fat, her characters see the same decline in theirs; and when she confronts the final unravelling of age and sickness and death, they appear in her fiction as well” (The New Yorker, Web).

“Escaping the Jewish pogroms that were part of life in Ukraine and other parts of the Russian Empire in the late 19th–early 20th century, Lispector at age five immigrated with her parents and two older sisters to Brazil. There her mother died some four years later of syphilis, contracted from a group of Russian soldiers who had raped her” (Britannica, Web).

Question #5: With her life experiences in mind, do you feel that the northeastern girl described in the text is a facet of Lispector’s being? Why or why not? How would her experiences with the war, death and poverty shape her work and her views of the world?

Argument: Lispector argues that knowledge and experience are intricately linked to humanity and not gender. She as an author, transcends the trap of being pigeon-holed into a female narrative. Lispector is an unbiased omnipresent force who paints The Hour of The Star in trials, meaning she is writing, living and experiencing the story at the same time through different planes of existence. It is within these realms that Lispector explores the ideas of Winnicott and Freud, illuminating the theories of the true-self and false self, day-dreaming and the act of play.

Argument: Lispector in her writing uses the spark of The All (the ever creating entity, otherwise known as “God”) to conduct interrupted play that allows her to know who or what she is. Her form of play, seamless bouncing from introspective interpretations of both male and female further gives support to the notion of Lispector’s “God-self” in her writing. Writing is considered an act of creation, and this act gives her power and agency in the world of The Hour Of The Star.