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theaspiringwanderess · 3 years ago

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The West Coast Trail; A Vancouver Island Adventure Of A Lifetime

The West Coast Trail is one of the most, if not the most, iconic Canadian west coast adventure a hiker could ask for. It is a 75km test of both physical and mental endurance in one of the most stunning environmental settings you have ever seen. Not everyone that sets out for this great journey completes it, but those that do have a tale to tell for a lifetime and a forever bond with those they meet along the way.

Having completed this epic trail twice now, my approach is to blend a little bit of old and new into a (hopefully) wondrous tail that offers context, wisdom and insight to the journey, while describing the magical things you will experience and the challenges you will face. I’ve also prepared additional posts for your reading pleasure on Packing: Food/Clothes/Essentials and Booking: Reservations/Transport. So please, grab a hot cup of tea, throw on those comfy pjs and sit back and enjoy the read.

Handy References and Information Material

Every great hike starts with research, especially this one! If you haven't heard of it yet, look up the famed book Blisters and Bliss: A Trekker's Guide to the West Coast Trail by David Foster and Wayne Aitken. This awesomely 80′s comic styled guide adds a little light-hearted humour to a highly detailed account of the WCT which is revised roughly every couple years. It offers both trekking options (north to south AND south to north!) and gives you all the step by step nitty gritty deets in between including history, objects of interest, geological features and safety tips! I suggest taking it with you and read about the section ahead each night. Also, opt to keep it in a safe pack pocket, don’t put it in a plastic bag (I did this my first time and sadly lost my copy to the inescapable moisture and mold).

Check out the West Coast Trail Facebook Page! This page is not manned by Parks Canada. However, it is a great place to meet other hikers, find someone looking to ride share, ask questions and for advice, learn about recent developments and important information (washed out bridges, danger sections, wildlife sightings or concerns... even hear about annoyed hikers picking up others garbage...not kidding lol).

Oh! And there is also a Women’s West Coast Trail Page!

Parks Canada Website. Duh, right?! But you may not realize that Parks Canada has some handy info regarding what to pack (and what not to!), emergency items, wildlife warnings, necessary fees, maps, tide tables, tips and more to make your hike a happy one. Check out the Planning For WCT page here.

You'll also find online a plethora of websites, blogs and articles dedicated to WCT info, tips, advice, and more. I encourage you to read a few personal accounts to get a real life feel of what others experience. Here are some of my favourites (don’t let the names scare you!), plus a very cool and scholarly article from UofBC on the effects of colonial-style tourism in the area and on the local indigenous tribes written in 2020. Fascinating read.

Hike The WCT (website)

Walking the wild coast : territory, belonging, and tourism on the West Coast Trail (UofBC Open Collection)

Lost On The West Coast Trail

How Not To Die On The West Coast Trail

The Facts

The West Coast Trail is 75 km long. That's on the map and, best as I can figure, relatively "as the crow flies". It does not account for the extra steps, the ladders, the climbing, the crawling, the descending, etc, you get the picture. Both times I've gone my fitbit has read almost double or more the distance in 'real ground covered'. For example, when they say its 5km from the Gordon River Trail Head to Thrasher Cove, my fitbit in both cases recorded over 12 km when all was said and done. When they tell you it takes on average 5-6 hours to do that stretch, and you're only covering 1km or less an hour, this is why. You will chuckle in the orientation, as many have, and think, "ya, if you're a SNAIL!", but you will soon realize it’s about the terrain and that you're essentially doing double or more the physical effort to cross it. The same is true for nearly all the trail, even the "easy parts".

Safety First - the majority of accidents and injuries occur in the first 13 kms on the south side of the trail, from Gordon River at km 75, to Camper Bay at km 62. The trail accommodates just over 7500 people a year. Of that, Parks Canada evacuates roughly 80-100 injured persons annually and Nitinaht villagers have claimed to ferry out 100-200 additional hikers off the trail as well, due to injury, misery, etc. It won’t be a bear or cougar that takes you out, it’ll be the wilderness itself. A fall from a wet log or slimy stone is the most common culprit, and it may not even be the fall itself, but what you land on. Sharp rocks, jabbing sticks, etc all cause serious injury. And it always happens when you're TIRED. Don't push yourself. Take a break, have a snack, don't go farther in a day than your body can handle. Better to be a day late than waiting 24 hrs in the bush with no morphine and a broken leg for a boat ride that surely will be agonizing. Just sayin' here...

The WCT historically was maintained for shipwrecked mariners. Many have lost their lives along this trail. I don’t understand how it doesn’t have its own ghost story yet! It has an amazing history with lots of ship wreckage to see along the way if you time the tides right.

Lastly, the temperate rainforest that engulfs the WCT is not only stunning but globally very rare, encompassing less than 1% of ecosystems across the earth. Here you will see plants, trees and animals that may not exist anywhere else on our planet. The Sitka Spruce for example is among not only the tallest trees in the world, but also the oldest, some 700-1000 years old. This means they have seen North America as it was before European Settlers touched it. They are revered by many and highly sought after by loggers, which often leads to conflicts. Many extremely unique animals also reside in the WCT, like the islands' black bears which are actually larger than mainland black bears with massive skulls and only one unique colour phase. The island is also home to cougars, Victoria's famous mini-deer and sea-wolves, the only wolves in the world that have adapted to life on a coastline, they call the Pacific Coast home. With a completely unique diet of seafood they are genetically different from mainland wolves and have also been known to swim in the ocean for many kilometers.

My West Coast Trail Story

Now, before we begin, I'll preface this by saying, don't mistake me for a pro; I am simply someone who has made it off the WCT twice [relatively] safely and lived to share my tale. If you are looking for expert advice I'd say check out the Parks Canada website or the Blisters and Bliss book. But if you are looking for a heartwarming and informative, real life account of the experience, you've come to a great place.

I am now amongst a lucky few that have had the enormous privilege to have hiked the West Coast Trail not only once, but twice in my lifetime thus far. I say thus far because this trail has such a special place in my heart I expect at some point I will likely attempt it again. It changed my life and has had an everlasting impact on the lives of those around me. I learned a lot about myself and even more about those closest to me. What I am capable of, the importance of preparation and planning, the bonds you create with people you meet along the way and the love of those that support you going and take care of things while you're gone. I simply couldn’t have done this without the support of my amazing husband, friends, parents and sister and my wonderful sister in law whom we stayed with this time. But most importantly I missed the encouragement and support of my mother-in-law who lived on the island and sadly has passed since my first trip. She and her friends played such an instrumental role in my first journey with my sister, buying us foods, housing us, driving us, and just overall being so excited to see us off, I truly missed her this time but I know she was there with me in spirit.

In this way the West Coast Trail is a life-shaping experience like no other. You will learn much about yourself, be in awe and hopefully inspired by the incredible natural world around you and you will meet fellow Canadians and global trotters and, in turn, become a part of their WCT story. Let me be amongst the first to congratulate you on this epic endeavor and wish you the happiest, and safest, of journeys and hopefully I can send you off a bit more well prepared for the adventure.

First Timers VS Second Timers

My experience as a first time WCT hiker was extremely different from my second expedition in every way possible.

The first time I hiked the WCT I went with my youngest sister Jenna. We had both hiked and camped before but this was a new experience and everything was raw, a bit scary, amazing and beautiful all at once. I think it just hit us both like a ton of bricks when we landed at the base of that first ladder across the Gordon River. Although Sharon had talked to me for months, mentally preparing me for the hike, when Jenna and I both looked up at the rest of our start group scaling that first beast, looming up from the small beach landing, I know we both had the exact same thought, like, "oh shit, this is for real...".

Why the WCT? Sharon, my good friend and co-worker, had previously attempted it before turning me onto it. Due to an unfortunate incident with her hiking companion, they had to turn in the towel. She has since rocked it twice more and was an absolute wealth of information, support and the wisdom that only an experienced female hiker, mom and athlete can be. Much of what I am sharing with you today began with her. She continues to inspire me every day with her ferocity and determination and boundless want for adventure.

At the time of my first hike in 2016, my mother-in-law lived on Vancouver Island and she and her best friend Jill had kindly arranged for us to stay at another friend's cottage just outside Port Alberni. The friend and her husband fed us well and the beauty of the setting was unimaginable. But the anticipation of what lay ahead weighed heavily on both Jenna and I and neither of us barely slept a wink. The next morning we had our last hot shower and flush toilet experience for the next 7 days and the 4 of us set out for the Gordon River Trail Head.

We piled into Jill’s car the following morning. The ride was long, on gravel switch back logging roads, but the supportive company made the nervous anticipation bearable. I feel like I did not appreciate the ride as much as I should have at the time, but a few 5 am bus rides (and much experience) later, I certainly cherish the thought my mother-in-law and Jill had put into making the beginning special for us both.

Since then, I've booked my island hike transports with the West Coast Trail Express bus. The folks there are super helpful and the experience has always been a good one. In 2018, a WCT facebook group was created which has made connecting with others looking for ride shares and doing the trail much easier AND more informative! You can read about this page and other research options at the top of this post if you missed them ;)

When 2016 saw Jenna and I land at Gordon River's Information Station, I was greeted with an amazing surprise... Sharon and Jackie (another friend) had pre-purchased for me a WCT t-shirt. I cried, there were no words. When 2021 saw Krista and I land at Gordon River's Information Station, I was greeted with a sense of the familiarity of the adventure and vicariously enjoyed the wonder of someone else now experiencing the trail for the first time... READY?!.. and INHALE... can you smell it..? the Adventure?! It's like greeting an old friend again, for the first time.

It's Like Those Choose Your Own Adventure Books, Where You Pick Your Ending...

Remember those..? Maybe..? When Starting the WCT, you can plan to start at either entry point, Gordon River to the south or Pacheena Bay to the north, or now even halfway at Nitinaht. There are advantages to all, so it just depends what is most appealing to you. Most people do the trail within a 6-8 day time frame. This gives a good balance of time vs pack weight. I always try to plan for an extra emergency day, just in case. Things happen here... Long stays requires more provisions and a heavier pack. Shorter stays (in my personal opinion) are extremely challenging, unless you have done the trail before, are very skilled in lightweight packing and are an expert hiker. I still wouldn't recommend it. Plus, if you're going that fast, you're rushing by so much, what's the point? If you've paid and taken the time to be here, enjoy it! That being said, when Jenna and I did the trail we were treated to watching marathoner and athlete Jen Segger run it in one day. ONE DAY. She currently holds the women's record for WCT completion at 13 hrs 44mins (as posted here on her page under 2016). Of course she had no pack and support runners with her and a camera crew. But as she ran by us I think both our jaws dropped. It was like watching Super Woman run by you and you were just lucky if her sweat spayed you as she passed by.

When you start out, keep in mind your pack is at it's heaviest. Starting at Pacheena Bay entry point means you'll be hiking the easiest parts of the trail first. You'll make excellent time here and cover the most distance over the shortest number of days. Although all areas of the trail offer exquisite and unique beauty, in my opinion the north end is the most magical. Maybe because by the time I reach it Im half delirious and most certainly exhausted so the easier hike is a much welcome break. Both times I've hiked the WCT I have opted to start at the southern trail head point known as Gordon River.

Starting at Gordon River means that you get through the most difficult terrain right at the beginning, when you're freshest, well rested and eager to set out. You also have the added benefit of anticipating the terrain getting easier (rather than harder). To me, this is the most logical approach and why I prefer this route and honestly, there is just something that seems slightly disillusioning about expecting something to get harder along the way. When Jenna and I first made it up that initial ladder we came across several groups finishing their hike. One in particular stuck out, a group of three female friends. We passed the first two who were happy and chatting and weirdly gave us a (mild) warning to disregard their companion, who was somewhere behind them. Ok... sure, we thought. Then along came the third girl... muttering, swearing under her breath, we contemplated what she might do to her companions if she caught up to them and we joked about how that likely was the end of that friendship. 2016 was a much busier year, pre-covid and all, and we met so many more people, Canadians, Germans, Chinese and Auzzies!

2021 though is the year of the Canadians! If you happen to head out on the WCT this year, although you will still experience a wide range of people (Canada is an extraordinarily diverse nation!), rest assured most currently reside within Canada. Hello Homies! It was, however, a much more muted WCT experience than my past one. Although the Parks staff assured me they have had lots of people come through (I asked!), and the online bookings are sold out, it seemed so much quieter day to day. At the time Krista and I arrived, Parks staff were still only doing outdoor basic debriefing, prior to which we were expected to watch an online information video covering the basics. This was in stark contrast to the very in depth orientation Jenna and I had to attend back in 2016.

Fellow Canadians, Tsk Tsk...

The biggest difference I noticed that could be as a result of the minimized debrief is the amount of garbage. There is NO garbage removal on the trail. Parks staff DO NOT haul garbage out (its a remote wilderness, do you really expect garbage men??). The WCT is accessible by foot (as in, you hike in... for 75 km) OR by boat, the latter being weather and safety dependant in extreme occasions (ie emergency evacuation). At each campsite we stayed, hikers THIS year (the trail was closed 2020) have left copious amounts of garbage. It’s in the bear bins, on the trail, the beach, in the outhouses... it’s EVERYWHERE. The worst by far was Camper Bay with stinking tuna cans and bags in every bear bin and Cribbs Creek, where the garbage pile extended to a massive bottle collection BEHIND the bear bin.

Why do sites have bear bins in the first place? Because human food and waste smells amazing to BEARS! So we lock it away to keep it, and us, safe. This does not mean a bear can’t smell it, it just means they can’t access it. Now, what happens when food rots and gets stinkier...? Of course it's more enticing. This draws bears, and other animals, to the campsite, which puts your safety, and the safety of each camper, at risk. I have to give Krista major kuudos here because that girl dug in deep, cleaned someone else's mess at each site we stopped at and even hauled out other people's stinky gross trash. Please give her a round of applause for thinking about you because she deserves it. And as Canadians, seriously, we can do better right??

Da' Debrief

Apologies, now that’s out, let's get on. During our debrief we learned some important key points.

2021 has seen unprecedented amounts of animal sightings and encounters. Primarily bear and cougar. There has also been more daytime sightings of wolves, which is considered extremely rare. With the trail closed in 2020, lack of human presence has caused a larger wildlife presence. Be aware, practice safety, travel in groups. Groups are also being asked to accommodate single hikers to reduce risk.

There is a lot of maintenance to be done that wasn't able to be accomplished in 2020 due to the pandemic. Be prepared for washed out boardwalks, bridges and rotten boards. There is also fewer Parks staff to help with this upkeep. Luckily, local members of indigenous tribes, called the Trail Guardians, historically help in a huge way with this and you may even run into them on the trail! We saw their team arrive in their new boat leaving Walbran and at Pacheena we spoke to a Parks staff who's uncle is on the team. It's a small world here.

Following the debrief, the Parks staff escort you to the Gordon River ferry. The fellow here takes you across and plops you down on the small sandy beach, gathers up any hikers waiting for a ride back and heads off on his way. And there you are, left to stare at a huge ladder, really, the first of many.

up, Up, UP You Go!

In 2016 Jenna and I patiently waited at the end of the line to be the last two up the ladder and I tackled the climb with my 50lb pack in tow (phew!). In 2021 Krista and I were the only two standing on the beach, me revelling in my 'barely there' 38lb pack. The trail was our oyster!

The trek from Gordon River to Thrasher Cove is the most challenging and physically demanding on the trail. We left on the 11:30 ferry and finally walked into Thrashers Cove at 5pm - Yes, it DOES take that long. You actually don't see many ladders, a few here and there, but best believe you are still climbing! You scramble up rock faces, you squeeze past trees, you choose your footing extremely carefully and all the while up, up, UP you GO! Even over rocks and hard ground the trail is fairly well worn and easy to follow... most of the time. A short while in you come to the first bridge over the first creek. I have stopped here both times to fill up water bottles, but beware, the scramble back up is more difficult than it looks this year due to the fallen trees. Mountain Goat level scuttling expertise is advised! Much further along, not far from Thrashers, you'll eventually comes across the famed Donkey Engine! This year you will find it to be directly in your path, where as in 2016 I’m quite sure we looked down on it somehow from a higher elevation. Either way, it’s epic and makes for an amazing photo op! To think that thing was hauled by beast and hand up that hill still blows my mind.

Along the way we met a very nice gentleman named Wilson who had intended to hike the WCT with his son. Unfortunately, due to a graduation re-scheduling mishap his son was unable to come, but Wilson decided to soldier on. He was incredibly happy, thoughtful and polite and asked if we minded if he tagged along as we hiked. He regaled us with tails of his trails, immigration to Canada, his wife and family and much more; he was a fascinating fellow! With the wildlife warnings this year, Parks staff request that no one hike alone, if you can, allow a solo hiker to tag along so everyone can stay safe. We graciously obliged and enjoyed his company and great conversation for a couple more days until we parted ways at Nitinaht comfort camping.

Thrasher's Cove is an amazing, but small, campsite. I recall vividly in 2016 the trail down to the beach being extremely treacherous, with steep and slippery embankments and so many ladders! By comparison our 2021 descent seemed like a cake-walk. Here I was, boasting to Krista the challenge that lay before her, but when we got there it was literally a quick hop and skip down. She found anything I said after that to be hard to believe and was convinced I was totally embellishing. It really made me realize how MUCH the trail changes and what dynamic metamorphosis must have occurred in 6 years! I also realized how hard Trail Guardians and Parks staff must work to maintain all this constantly worn out infrastructure. It must a BEAST. Be warned, if you arrive to Thrashers too late in the day it will be tough finding a spot. If this happens to you, check out the south side of the beach, sometimes there's a bit more space there. Ironically, I have set up my tent in the exact same spot both times, right in front of the tiny triangle cave around the rock wall on the south side of the beach. I have claimed this spot now.

Knock, Knock, It's The Ocean!

This is also where knowing how to read your tide tables is extremely important. While camping on the beach you must pitch your tent above the high tide line. The high tide line is where you can see the sand was last wet on the beach. It's not where the water is when you arrive. Look for the wet point on the sand and keep your tent a few good feet above that. When Jenna and I first arrived at Thrashers, I was confident in my tide table reading skills; being from Alberta, I took the time to learn how to read them in advance. But, during the orientation the Park staff had warned our group that our first night was due to be the highest high tide of the year - intimidating to a couple prairie girls! And, which is also a thing if you read up on the moon cycle! (Actually there is a lot of news this year on the effects of the moon's impending orbital wobble on tides, its a fascinating read if you're interested!). So, naturally a bit cautious and overly leery of the horror stories of campers waking up to soaked tents in the middle of the night, my poor sister was worried sick. Exhausted but too afraid to sleep, I promised her I'd stay up till high tide to make sure we were safe. She soon passed out and I settled in reading my book. But the surf was loud and near, a thundering, crashing rukus with each wave and about 2 hours in my sister jolted straight up in her sleeping bag, scaring the ba-geezus outta me crying out 'IS IT HERE?! IS THE OCEAN HERE YET?! ", big-eyed I just stared, then broke out laughing; I settled her back down, reassured her we were safe, now passed the time of concern, and wiggled down into my own sack to drift off. It's still an inside joke to this day and once in a while we chuckle to each other about the time the ocean came knocking.

2021 brought me its own surprise when at 4am I awoke to an unusual scratching noise against our tent next to my head. We had wrapped our rain covers around our [empty] backpacks and snugged them up against the tent to stay dry and save space. Apparently the local otter family found them fascinating and decided to check them out on their morning stroll. An alarm clock certainly fit for the WCT.

It's A Beach Walk, Not A Cake Walk

Leaving Thrasher's Cove you have two options! You can take the beach route if you time the tides carefully OR you can take the inland route. In 2016 Jenna and I sojourned the inland route. Although the inland hike was pretty, if I'd found the trek down to Thrashers tough, the trek back up would've been classed insane. Sharon’s favourite saying is, what goes down must go up. In 2021 Krista and I timed the tide, leaving at 7:30am, to take the beach route. Although we'd planned to avoid what turned out to not be a bad climb, I'd really wanted to see the famous sea caves! The sea caves themselves were nothing short of AMAZING. There is just no other word. I was so in awe that in my mind they seem to take up almost 3 days of our trip, not just half an hour on the second day.

Although we'd planned to aim for Cullite Creek Campground day 2, we hit a major snag. As we traipsed along, well after the sea caves, we came to a rocky sea shelf that rose high out of the water. As you look up, you might catch a glimpse of some buoys, which commonly mark the beach access to the trail and campgrounds. Thinking this was our access back onto the trail, as you must go inland from here to Campers, we headed up along the higher shelf. We passed an unusual 'Danger' sign. We looked around, but could not identify anything that seemed out of the ordinary for where we were. We kept on. We came to a similar sign on the rock, but again, failed to see what was obviously dangerous. Wasps? Bear den? Surge Channel? There was no fallen bridge, no down ladder. Everything seemed ok. We reached the buoys, and Krista lifted her leg to step over a small trickle of a water... That's when it happened.

Danger on the Trail...

Before she could even complete her step, both feet flew out from beneath her and her whole body, pack and all, smashed onto the rock shelf. She began rocketing like a she was on a pro waterslide down the embankment towards a 9 foot drop into the water pool below. I had the wherewithal to shout out 'grab a rock!', and in the 3 seconds that seemed like 3 hours, I had the presence of mind to ponder how I might explain this to her mother back at home and 4 year old son if things went sideways... but with a 38lb pack on myself and being a few feet behind, there was no way I could move fast enough to do anything but yell.

Luckily, mid-slide, she managed to grab a handhold just long enough to stop and get some footing. Crisis averted, but the damage was done. Wearing shorts, she was sporting some nasty road rash on her cheek and arm, but most of the damage was buffered by the hoodie she'd had tied around her waist. She was bruised, but she was lucky.

Feeling pretty roughed up, we opted to stay at Camper Bay instead and rolled in about 1pm where we washed and treated her ailing buttocks and gave her some much needed pain meds. Along came a few more groups and we felt a bit less sheepish learning 2 of them had also had the exact same experience. Pride slightly less wounded, we made some new friends for the chatter and laid back and chilled for the afternoon. On your parks provided trail map, you will see a small note in red pointing to BA 'B' (beach access B) that warns about a dangerous slope just past the surge channels after Owen Point. It's not kidding.

If you stay at Camper Bay, it's a lovely and large campsite with lots of room for everyone. However, it has a habit of getting very windy, like all the time, and the only time it's not is when the sun goes down. If you're early enough, grab one of the sheltered tent spots in the woods/taller grass along the creek side. It also has a rep for early morning rain and fog. Something about the geography here seems to create its own micro-environment. If you walk out along the beach at low tide and cross the creek to the north, you'll see some neat tidal pools and caves in the rock wall. In the one with the small pool of water you might see a single lonely fish with the pool all to himself. I hope one day the tide washes him in friend.

Reminiscing...

Ironically, day 2 in 2016 was also the day I had a mishap of my own. Tired and worn down, toddling after Jenna across a log bridge the width of my car, I misstepped. My feet were somehow gone and in a second I found myself sitting on my ass, straddling the log instead of walking on it. I peered down into the 6 foot drop below. Completely in disbelief I suddenly realized Jenna was yelling at me "Are you OK?!" ... Yes! I was! I was ok. Nothing was broken, hurt or otherwise. But it was a wake up call. If you are tired, take a break, don't push on or try to keep up with someone faster. Only hike as fast as your slowest hiker and be patient. Take a breath and remember, the goal is no one dies out here... hopefully.

Gone Are The Days Of Legendary Mud And Tilting Ladders That Make You Poop ... Just A Little

The few days that followed are a bit of a blur. There's so much to see and so little blog space to include it all! We left Campers Bay on a foggy, rain mist morning at about 10am. Since we had to take the inland trail there was no worry about racing the tide on this stretch. We chatted with the couple we met the night before (Mat and Lauren from Calgary!). Everyone was a bit tired that morning.

Although we saw some mud, with a historic heat wave just prior to our trip in 2021, the legendary mud pits that the WCT has typically been known for were non-existent. In 2016 Jenna and I spent most of our inland trail time figuring out how to cross mud-holes, watching where each other stepped and trying not to fall in up to our armpits (I kid you not). This time, there was no mud and if you disagree with me, go again after it rains. I dare you.

This is also the section where we saw the most ladders, most notably through Cullite Creek, which was sadly such a trickle there was no need for the cable car, we just rock hopped across (with ease). We saw some really cool art done along the trail by the Guardians in the new bridge and log cuttings, some even signed their names! Have you tried making a curve with a chainsaw? I was impressed.

This section also has a neat and unique stretch of boardwalk that goes through a fragile wetland. Sections of the boardwalk were out, it looks easy, don't let it fool you!

A brand-spank'in new suspension bridge calls Logan Creek home! In 2016 Jenna and I had to climb a harrowing series of crazy, half-tilted ladders to get to the bridge. I recall my favourite as being the third ladder in a tower, that was so amazingly on a 10 degree angle sideways, and scaling it with my 50lb backpack. It was all I could do not to roll off and meet a perilous end at the bottom of the gully. Today the beautiful new bridge almost disappointed with the ease it took to cross it. NO more ladder climbing, you just walk up the stairs and off you go!

We arrived in Walbran Campsite at 5:30, the creek is perfect for swimming if it’s warm enough. Several groups had a run-in here with a couple breaking the fire ban policy. People on the WCT take this seriously, keep in mind if you start a forest fire here, there’s no where to go and it puts the homes of indigenous peoples at severe risk too. We all simmered, had a tasty meal, chatted with our travel companions, explored the beach a bit and turned in for the night, thoroughly exhausted.

We spent the next two days going from Walbran Campsite to Cribbs and then to Tsuisiat Falls. Due to a problematic and confrontational cougar in 2021 there is no camping permitted along the trail between kilometer 34 to 38. So, naturally, your last stop prior to Nitinaht Narrows is Cribbs Creek.

The Stretch from Walbran to Cribbs is basically all beach walk. The beach is lovely, but don’t let 'beach walk' fool you. It’s just as challenging to walk in sand as it is through forest... and you thought it was going to be easier, didn’t you?! It's like walking through snow without snowshoes and being 30lbs heavier...what a Canadian thought. But! Fear Not! along this stretch is also the famed Chez Moniques burger stop and the Carmanah Lighthouse! The lighthouses are closed to the public this year due to covid, but it’s still a sight to behold as it beams brightly through the fog.

The Legend That Is Chez Moniques

In 2016 Jenna and I made a critical, but common, food planning error. We packed meals based on what we felt was healthy and would give us energy, without accounting for taste. In other words, we packed a lot of dry lentil-based meals that tasted awful and took forever to cook and I couldn't have forced down my throat if you had paid me. I love beans, but dried lentils on the trail... yech! You can read more about our cautionary tale in my food section, and if you're uncertain about foods to pack, it’s worth the read!

So, sufficed to say, that year we had the absolute pleasure of experiencing Chez Moniques in it's prime. It was incredible. Here we were, in the middle of nowhere, exhausted, starving (I was anyway lol), and run off our feet. And out of nowhere arose this mirage of a tent with burgers, fancy meals, peach ciders and more! My god it was intense. We kicked off our boots, stuffed our faces, chatted with Monique, the legend herself, and I protectively cradled the best Okanagan Cider that had ever touched my lips while we waited for the tide to recede. It was magical.

Sadly, between 2017-2018 both Monique and her husband tragically passed away. It was a blow felt around the world by all those who had passed through their doors and experienced their generosity. There is a lovely documentary attributed to their memory here. Today, in 2021, following a devastating 2020 with no business, Monique & Peter's grand-daughter, Katrina Knighton is trying to carry on the dream though the restaurant will be renamed as Nytom. We heard lots of chatter and some hikers did actually see her in person, but unfortunately there are some struggles, including keeping up supply levels, which they are walking in for 1.5 hours (!). We missed them this year, as did many hikers, and I was so sad Krista would not experience it. But! They are rumoured to have services most often morning and around 5pm. Katrina is also very active on the WCT Facebook page, so feel free to drop her a line there for more info!

We arrived in Cribbs Creek at about 2:30pm. It was the end of our Day 4 and what a campsite it was. Lovely soft sand under your toes and beautiful beach. There is nothing here for swimming but we had the most amazing sunset view on the rock shelf that night. Although it didn't rain while we were on the trail, this was the first time we'd seen the sun since we left Victoria.

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The Magical Beauty Of Nitinaht And The Crab Shack Of Your Dreams

We left Cribbs Creek about 9am and stuck to mostly inland trail. Other hikers going the opposite way had warned it was very overgrown but we honestly had no problems with it; it was a little underused, but keep in mind they hadn't seen the south side yet. We made excellent time and arrived in Nitinaht Narrows at 1:09pm. The journey is absolutely stunning. There is a new bridge over the creek at Dare Beach and the forest walk is lovely. The bridge over the Cheewhat River offers great views also. You cannot take water from the river itself but after the bridge there is a freshwater stream marked by a wooden sign if you need it and soon you will come across an old Cabin. When you arrive here, turn around and see the new and amazing Ditidaht home across the river. It has changed a bit, likely with the drought, but in 2016 Jenna and I referred to this stretch as "the place that Disney films are based on". Ivy clung all the way up the trees and just as you wrapped your head around that, the trail winds it's way through a silent coniferous forest where you could almost hear a pin drop, followed by a magical wetland lake with flowering lilly pads the size of your head. But none of this compares to Nitinaht Narrows.

As you walk along the trail, just a few short minutes past the lake, the path will turn from boardwalk to dirt and as you round the bend you will suddenly walk, with no warning, right into Nitinaht! It has caught me by surprise each time. We strolled down the walkways to the dock, left our packs safely on the bench and made our way to the Crab Shack. The blue-green waters of Nitinaht Narrows is something to behold. When you peer over the side of the wharf you see schools of small fish so thick you could almost surely touch them. When I dream of paradise, I dream of here.

Nitinaht Narrows was only recently made an 'official' entry and exit point by Parks Canada in 2014, you can read more about it here. But prior to this, older community members witnessed the inception and rise of the WCT as we know it today and watched it grow. Ferrying hikers across the narrows has become a task handed down from generation to generation. Connected to the ocean, it has tides about 10 minutes apart and historically, many years ago, hikers did drown trying to swim across before getting swept out to sea, naively misjudging the calm-looking waters. About 3 kms past the narrows, the Ditidaht band offers comfort camping options to those looking to settle and day hike the trail or in need of a break from the grind. This is marked with a sign and you will see it on the trail. The crab shack itself has also recently built new cabins as well which start from roughly $100/night (houses 4 bodies and you use your own sleeping bag) and goes up to ($200 and $300) where bedding is provided. They also offer tent platforms for a modest $30/night fee.

The Nitinaht Crab Shack is owned and operated by the Edgar family. They are kind, light-hearted, hospitable and will make you the best meal you have ever had. They work extremely hard and have a great sense of humour. A family member told me the previous day they had served a group of 20 lunch all at the same time! Hippie-Doug was their ring leader that day and he manned the ferry, that took us across the narrows to complete our journey, along with a sweet old chocolate lab you will see in many a hikers' photos. If you catch him at a slow moment he might share a joke and and story with you. But don't leave until you have warmed yourself thoroughly by the wood stove, had the best meal this side of Canada and picked up some treats for the road. The ferry finishes for the day at 4:30pm and then Hippie-Doug settles in for a much deserved break, a meal, and maybe a drink, so don't be late!

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Tsu-Tsu-Tsusiat!

We left the warming comfort of the Nitinaht stove at about 3pm and headed on our way. We saw our new friend and traveling tag-along Wilson off at the Ditidaht Comfort Camping site and continued on, arriving at Tsusiat Falls by 6:30pm. You can't see the falls from the beach, but if you reach the hole in the wall at Tsusiat Point, you're just minutes away.

In 2016, the first 5 days of our hike Jenna and I had the most amazing weather. On our 5th day, after the crab shack, while the sun beamed a balmy 25+ C, we ditched our packs on a slope of sand with gentler waters between Nitinaht and Tsusiat Point and ran into the ocean up to our knees, jumping the waves and being astonished at their strength. We laid on the beach afterwards and soaked in the sun. When I think of my little sister, I often think of this carefree day and smile. Enjoy the journey as you go, or you’ll miss the best parts.

Tsusiat Falls is a popular campground. When we arrived the beach was packed. According to 2021 Parks regs, you can only stay one night here to minimize environmental impact. The beach was very different from what I remembered, but the falls were ever glorious. We threw on bathing suites and while Krista enjoyed the brief sun, I took a dip in the beckoning water.

The next morning, with Krista not feeling hot, I'd aimed to get up early and walk back to the Hole In The Wall with my Nikon DSLR camera. When we passed by the day before it was high tide and the Hole was under sea water. However, after a delay, Krista decided to come with me. We packed up, left our bags at Tsusiat and strolled back to the hole together, and a better decision it was. I’d watched a group ahead of us pass through an hour ago, but beneath their tracks you could make out a fresh set of cougar prints. Since low tide was at 10am that morning, that means the tracks were very recent and could only have been made since the water receded. Food for thought.

Darling Bears You Might Be Cute, But I Don't Want To Snuggle

The last 2 days on the WCT (or your first two, depending where you start) are the easiest to hike and where you make up the most ground. We'd intended to land at Darling River Campsite (approx km 14), which from Tsusiat (approx km 25) would make it about an 11 km day. Most of our fellow travellers whom we had become familiar with were aiming for Michigan Creek though, which would add 2 km to our 6th day, but save us that on our 7th and final day out. We decided to see what the day held and if we arrived at Darling early we might continue on. WELL.... what the day held was not entirely what we expected.

In 2016 Jenna and I walked the beach hike between Tsocowis Creek and Michigan Creek. It had started to rain the night before and by morning was a light, but steady, downpour. We donned our rain gear but by noon, and halfway through our distance, it was clear that Jenna's rain jacket was not waterproof. Though she had tested it prior to leaving, it turned out not to be up to WCT-level rain. As we continued on poor Jenna got wetter and wetter and by the time we reached Michigan, she was soaked through to the bone. Water pooled in her boots, and she shivered so hard she couldn't help me with the tent. Realizing this could get worse quickly, I popped the tent, got her changed and snugged into her sleeping bag ASAP. Then I worked on adding a tarp. When the shivering stopped we got a warm meal into her and passed our time taking turns winding up our emergency radio and trying to maintain the faint signal from a long forgotten US talk station till darkness fell. It poured the entire next day as well for a total of over 24 hours straight and our photos at the Pacheena lighthouse are in plastic emergency ponchos.

In 2021 Krista and I opted for the inland trail as we'd previously made better time this way. There is lots to see here, another Donkey Engine and a rusty old grader, and I absolutely love the Billy Goat Bridge. The trail threw us for a bit at Tsocowis Creek, there, phantom branch-offs seemed to lead off and abruptly stop. You have to go down the ladders to continue the inland trail portion (OR access the beach). However, just passed Orange Juice Creek, it was quite clear this section of trail was not well used recently... by people anyway. It was eerily dark, overgrown and passed by what looked like long lost abandoned campsites in caves along the rock wall. As we passed by we heard something stir in the dim light, knocking over an old cup, and we nervously quickened our pace. We began to see pile after pile of fresh bear scat, some so fresh that by the time we reached Darling we figured we must be just behind it. Making a lot of noise we made our way to the beach and relief washed over us as we recognized people half a km ahead... our fellow Albertans, Mat and Lauren! But when they stopped suddenly and started to back up we knew something wasn't right.

Just ahead of them on the beach was our bear. And big guy he was! They figured a lone male. They managed to scare him off and once we caught up the 4 of us made our way as a group to Michigan Creek just down the beach where we figured there was relative safety in numbers.

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Bitter Sweet Goodbyes

Our last day from Michigan to the Information Station at Pacheena was a super short one. We were the last hikers to leave Michigan at 8am and among the first ones (ironically) to reach the Parks office at 11:01am. The path is very well maintained and an easy hike. You'll also see a lot of day hikers here, many with dogs. Along the way are some cool sights you won't want to miss, so don't be too quick to rush out. The abandoned dirt bike isn't going anywhere fast anymore, but be sure to check out the sea lion rock just passed km 10. You may even hear them from the trail! Just before the sea lions you'll also pass by the Pacheena Lighthouse. Again, due to covid, you cant access the grounds but you can totally snap a quick pic! The area has so much bear activity Parks Staff joke about running 'bear daycare' here so be vigilant. Two wonderfully enthusiastic young ladies we met along the way carried an amazing tune; Im sure they must've charmed away any "would be" encounters.

In 2016 there was no km 1 sign on the trail and in 2021 there was still no km 1 sign lol. Both times I raced past km 2 and then later wished I'd taken a pic with it. You'll want it as proof! We walked the very last km along the beach, where firm sand makes for easy going. There were bear sightings of a mother and cubs here just before we arrived. We missed them, but were lucky enough to get some great foot-print photos. The very last bench you'll see on the trail is emblazoned with the word 'PARKS'. We sat here for an eternal minute and took some photos. As we strolled towards the Information station I couldn't believe it was over again so quickly.

Looking back, even after time number two, it feels more like a dream. The first time I walked off the trail in 2016 I eagerly anticipated a hot shower, was thoroughly disappointed at finding I had no quarters for to pay for one and I spent the 5 hour bus ride home starving and trying to sleep on a roller coaster. Perhaps not such a glorious end, but I realized I had achieved something few people would in their life time and of that I was SO proud of Jenna and myself. We did it.

When I arrived back at work Sharon had the most glorious little bouquet of flowers for me and she glued tiny cut out flags of all the major trail milestones to skewer sticks throughout. It brought tears to my eyes.... she told me this, "for a while, you will think to yourself, I am NEVER going back to that EVER again. And then, slowly, you will forget all the bad parts and the thought will creep in... maybe, perhaps, I might try it again... and you will find yourself looking it up once more". And she was right, I did. And I am so glad I did... I might even do it again.

#WCT #West Coast Trail #hike #hiking #nature #british columbia #travelbc #hike2021 #vancouver island

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carnal-lnstinct · 4 years ago

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Conton City Lockdown

Summary: Time patrollers have returned from missions carrying an unknown disease and infecting others denizens of Conton City with it, forcing Trunks and Supreme Kai of Time to shut down most operations and training around the City and drastically limit missions for a while until they can get everything under control. Everyone is instructed to stay inside their assigned domiciles until further notice. "Who knows what that could do to the timeline if Patrollers pass it on during a mission?!" Supreme Kai of Time urges Conton. The Conton City Hero has also been quarantined with her current Master, Goku much to both their dismay as there was still so much training left. What other shenanigans can the two saiyans get themselves into while being all cooped up.

Word Count: 6,013 (Chapter 3) AO3 Rating: Explicit / Mature Warning: nsfw ( smut, explicit language ) A/N: I actually booted up Xenoverse 2 again to get a bit more idea what to do with this chapter. I tell myself I don't want long chapters since this is a short one-shot, but I couldn't bring myself to pass on the details here. Hope its worth it!

Chapter 3

Days were really starting to feel blended together now. With Conton city running on 24 hour daylight, the week's time that passed felt like one extremely long day. By the grace of the technological advancements here were you able to track the time and days. That and the daily scheduled check in from the robotic clerks of Conton. The second most physical presence you were able to get now.

You finally awoke on the sofa feeling lighter than you remember when falling asleep. The heavier figure of the wild haired man was nowhere to be found around you. You opened your eyes to find you were alone in the living room, no immediate sounds being made until the faint hints of water sloshing around behind a door hit your ears. Relieved to still sense the passive ki of your fighting master, it wasn't completely gratifying to wake up without him. Again. For two people sleeping together, you and Goku never actually slept together. All the times he fell asleep before you, you left him to his peace and went to your bedroom alone along with him never failing to make an effort of relocating you to your room when you would fall asleep around him or are left barely lucid from your rumps. It all comes to you foggy, but you know he does it with such care and tenderness, the way he places you in your bed and tucking the blanket around you before departing to his designated sleeping space. This time though, you insisted he not to do that. Even going so far as commandeering the couch he slept on. You wanted to stay with him for the whole night at least once. Having stretched yourself out along the sofa messily decorated with a spare blanket and pillow, you patted your chest invitingly with your persistent charm knowing he could not deny it. You left him no choice but to crawl onto you and rest his head against your breasts. You still remember the length of his arms stretching around you to snuggle to his comfort, his torso between your legs and how comically his feet hung off the edge of the chair. And the weight of all his muscles on you. He seemed to become heavier the longer you stayed that way until you drifted off like a weighted blanket you never knew you needed. A brief moment where you slightly stirred from your sleep was content to still feel him wrapped around you and shifted against the weight of him for more, needing more of him around you and drifted off once again with a hand lost in his hair and another hanging around his shoulders.

It would appear he couldn't wait to get this "new day" started, the saiyan male already washing up and would be expecting breakfast to follow soon after. Come to think of it, you haven't taken a decent bath yourself since the day before yesterday and you slowly remember why.

Yesterday with little convincing, you talked Goku into following you outside to the rooftop area of your building for just a small, quick spar to keep the muscles loose. No transforming, no ki blasts, no charging your energy. Just a small practice of physical skill and technique, something that barely counted as a work out between trained saiyans such as yourselves. But something was better than nothing. It was almost eerie how quiet the large city was with only the sound of the robotic clerks working away at various tasks,but the way the sun hit you skin roused you up for the risk. Sadly it didn't take long for the small training session to draw one of their attention. The robotic voice calmly urging the both of you to go back inside per its protocol, however was immediately cut off by the sharp pierce of the familiar, old yell from your former mentor.

"Have you lost your marbles!?" The Elder Kai's vocals startling you and rattling the machine itself, shouting from the robot's speakers. "We are in a state of emergency! How dare you of all people not heed the warnings of your elders! How reckless!! Shameful!! Get your tuckus back inside or I will suspend you from any Quests! Permanently!"

Usually the old man's berating didn't phase you by much, but the thought of never going on a time patrol again wracked your core as a chilling fact of his power. Well, not his power but what the Supreme Kai of Time would do if or when she found out. You wasted no time teleporting out of there the moment you recover from your shock, leaving the confused Goku behind who immediately followed after your ki once he detected you back inside. The poor robotic clerk left to heal from the voice rattling it.

Suffice to say, getting caught really shook you up more than you could have expected. More than fighting the powered up Mira or even an angry Beerus. And though you hoped it wouldn't, it did get to the Supreme Kai of Time whose lecturing stung worse. She sounded more understanding and approached the situation more openly than the old man but the guilt certainly sat in your chest all the same. Back inside your living quarters, the conversation between you and the two Kais over your communicator ends with you being reminded of the current danger and the lack of grasp on their ends to plan a counterattack accordingly. Isolation wasn't the best option, but it was all they had so far that kept the strange disease from passing around, even sharing worry of it being anything like the virus that had attacked Goku across the timelines. Supreme Kai of Time made a passing thought that they would be in need of you very soon as well, rousing hope in you again. The Kais didn't waste time questioning Goku's presence either as he watched over your shoulder through the whole thing. You immediately answered vaguely, leaving it as him simply stopping by to train, a true fact a week ago, but since he was already here you could stand the company and he was eager to help where needed as well. That had set the tone for the rest of the day, prompting your dispirited heart to submit to whatever comfort the larger saiyan gave you by simply being there. Even just a cuddle to sleep.

With all of that flooding back into your mind, you sighed and figured it was time you prepared for the day as well, holding out hope you would be summoned to the Time Nest and anxious that maybe you would be left waiting longer as punishment. Heading into your bedroom to choose some comfy clothes to change into after your bath, an old duffel bag catches your eye as you went through your closet. It's familiar, of course, but its contents are a mystery. You hadn't used this bag since you first entered the Time Patrol Academy. Inside, you find an old scouter, your first scouter, and the old, blue bodysuit you used to wear under your armor. Made of the familiar saiyan-grade material. A nostalgic glance between the two items rushes you with a feeling of worry all over again from the Kais words replaying in your head. But Supreme Kai of Time did say soon.. You can only continue to try to remain optimistic.

Until then...an idea pops into your head, that scoundrel grin rising into your features.

Goku is settled into the tub that fit his entire body better than the small couch he was had been resting on for the week, the hot water and space around him gives such a relief to his body. He gave a light stretch before submerging himself further, knees rising out of the water but a knock at the door catches his attention.

"Oh Kakarot." He hears your voice a few moments later and turns his head toward the unlocked door. "Are you hiding from me in there?" Your tone is playful and calm, but he doesn't think twice about it.

"Not at all, did ya need something?" He answers, unaware of what was awaiting him beyond the door. You press the button sliding the door open, the bathroom light revealing your form to the half submerged saiyan. Your tail is slowly swaying behind you as you stand there with a hand on your cocked hips and the other braced on the doorway to give you an imposing and suggestive stance. Wrapped around your upper body is the blue suit alone, clinging tightly to your curves and purposely left raised around your thighs to expose them more where they connected to your ass. You purposely left yourself bare underneath the whole thing. Your feet and hands were fitted into the old white boots and matching large white gloves. And of course, the scouter is affixed to your ear to complete the look.

"Hey, Earth man." You greet him in your most sultry tone while attempting to come off as a threat, loosely wrapping your tail around your hips. "I'm here to conquer you..and then take your magical balls all for myself. What are you going to do about it, huh?" Goku's eyes lift, mesmerized by the appearance of you but not for the reason you had hoped for. "Oh, wow you have one of those power reading thingies. You look like Vegeta when he first came to Earth." He pointed at you, naivety on full display.

'That was hardly a compliment', you thought, the permanent scowl on the Prince's face flashing through your mind.

You try to play that off and raise your head to increase your look of intimidation and to keep the focus on your goal, giving him a sly smirk as you pressed the scouter button to activate it. The equipment pings and starts to reads his passive energy. "That's right, Kakarot. I'm a saiyan, after all. And according to my scouter...You're gonna be a howling mess after I pound you into the ground. Begging me to finish you off. What d'ya have to say to that?" You tease, giving him an expected look to pick up on.

Goku sits up in the water and leans against the edge of the tub as he tilts his head at you, blinking. "I think your scouter is broken, you know it's going to take a lot more training before you're able to beat me." You visibly cringe at his answer.

"--I KNOW!" You shot back, nerve scratched. Immediately you curse under your breath having openly admitted that. "I'm trying to flirt with you, ya dolt! I've been trying for 2 days now!" You huff and throw your hands up in defeat. "Forget it! Just hurry up so I can take a bath!" You storm out of the doorway snatching the scouter from your ear. As the door closes behind you, the sound of Goku calling after you to wait grows quiet as you go back into your bedroom. Throwing the scouter onto the bed you start muttering to yourself as you return to your previous task of looking for something to settle around the house again. You start to hear the bathroom door open and the heavy steps coming up fast, the dripping wet Saiyan making his way into the room with his right hand holding the towel closed around his waist.

"H-hey! I'm sorry! I-I didn't realize-!" He stutters nervously over his words as you shoot him a glare, silencing him.

"Save it! We've been at this for a week already and you still don't get it. I could wear a sign that read 'Hey Kakarot! Shove your dick inside me until I pass out again' and you would still be dense to what it means!"

"P-Please just hear me out. You know as well as I do this is all still new to me. I don't mean to make you mad but c-can you really be that surprised about i-"

"I CAN, YOU JACKASS!" You yell, stomping your way over to him as he stumbles back against the wall and you shake a gloved fist at him. "How many more times we have to do it before it gets through your thick head?! You'd pick up on me going to the kitchen for any reason at all if it got you food better than me spreading my legs in your face! GET WITH IT, KAKAROT!" You growl, your energy peaking visibly as the clear aura wrapped around you, blowing your wild saiyan hair into a frenzy. You're not as frustrated at this vicious cycle you keep going through with him and flirting, trying to play subtle and coy in getting his attention. No, it was more of everything else going on around you two.

"Easy! I will, I promise!" The larger saiyan pleaded mercy for your calm to return, a single hand up in defense of you as he felt all the more vulnerable dripping wet and barely holding the towel around his hips. Regaining your wits at his demeanor, you realized what you were doing and backed down. Your ki settles back down to your base level.

"No..." You sigh heavily, giving his wet chest a ginger pat over to better show you're harmlessness. "You're doing fine. Just..." You didn't want to come off as a bully, especially to one of the strongest warrior you know while he's naked. You begin to feel you may be shoving him out of his comfort zone despite how well received your advances do tend to go with him. Whatever this is between you two, something you still need to address. "Never mind. I'm just.. frustrated with everything else going on and I'm unfairly taking it out on you." You admit, placing your hands on your hips and turning away as you pouted with lightly dusted cheeks. "I-I'm big enough to admit that.. Just thought.. Maybe I needed a distraction from it all for a bit, but that's not your problem. I-I'm...S-sorry..."

Goku recovers, reading your change in energy beyond you lowering your power level. Better than he has picked up on most things around you lately, but to be fair he has been improving on noticing some things beyond that of a direct kiss to the lips or an obvious frown he couldn't fix with his ever encouraging words. He too remembers the old man's lecture of you basically almost being out of the job for what you two did outside and the following disapproval of the Supreme Kai of Time pretty much offering the same consequence should you go off without order again. All of that for just a little training? He gets why, but for all you've done they could have been less harsh. It's not easy for saiyans to sit still for too long. It clicks that he should know--does know-- you a little better now in this small time together than he has in all of the time you spent training from the day he first took you on as his pupil. Your job as a time patroller has been your life for a long time now, to not do it or anything that has to do with it was like taking away your reason for fighting. For training, to become stronger. All of his efforts to one day make a powerful and tough opponent out of you to challenge for real would be for nothing. Even now you back down from him and apologize in your own way for yelling at him. That was a first. Admittedly, he admires that unyielding fire in you. Goku finally understands that you don't feel good, but you're trying to. He should have realized by the sudden appearance of you in the saiyan costume that you were up to something to lift your spirit and tag him along for the fun. What kind of Training Master had he been to not realize his pupil was so deeply troubled? He...He's going to fix it.

"You're right." The larger saiyan nods, you glance over your shoulder to look at him. "I must be foolish to not see it sooner... Right, then." He laugh softly, quickly he adjusts the towel around his waist with a small knot and places his hands on the sides of his face giving an overly dramatic look of terror. "Oooh nooo! It is a saiyan from another planet coming to destroy me!"

Your brow quirks at this sudden display and you turn around to find him dropping down on his knees with his head lowered, bowing down to you in this animated fashion to accent his downright hammy performance. "Please don't destroy my planet, oh evil one! Take me instead!"

Unbelievable. You snort and break into a laugh. "Kakarot, no. You don't have to do this. It's okay."

"Oh yeah?" He lifts his head up with a wink and leaps up, putting space between you both and takes on his fighting stance. "Because I am not Kakarot! I am Goku, the saiyan from earth and defender of its people! I will defeat you, evil saiyan!" He smirks, immediately transforming into his super saiyan form. The aura washing over the room and leaves the pale gold color of hair and azure eyes "glaring" back at you.

You blink at him, body stirred by the sudden appearance of his super saiyan form. Lifting your hands from your hips you slowly take a fighting stance of your own. "Goku, 'defender of earth' huh?" You repeat grinning as well, the similar shade of blue replacing the black hue of your eyes as the golden glow burst out around your body. "Not when I'm done with you. I'm going to put you on your back, Earth boy."

"Not if I put you on yours first."

You didn't expect that, but you would be lying if you said it didn't immediately excite you. The space around you is small but you waste no time jumping forward with a ready fist to punch at him. He blocks you with his forearm and as you come at him again with your off hand, punch denied again by a raised knee.

You're both holding back, but the loose items around you are rattling on their surfaces from the force of your moves alone. You continue going at him, picking up the pace with your half-hearted punches. Goku remaining ever elusive to your increasing speed, movements blurring to the naked eye. Your hands collide together, feet braced on the floor as you pushed against each other in this playful display of strength. Fingers laced, the electric blue of your eyes boring into one another as sparks of rogue energy began to race in between your hold and around each of your knuckles. It was amazing how you were both barely giving any effort worth bragging about but still managed to produced such energy, this vortex of power appearing around you and the vibrations shaking the entire place. You can start to feel energy tingling, grow erratic between your palms, this making you both quickly draw back before it escalated into something more wild and destructive to your room.

You could only look at each other through the gap of empty space between you now as the feeling of that energy still tingles against your skin but starting to fade. A silent exchange between your stares and your smile fades, Goku withdrawing from his fighting pose to stand at his tallest. Together, you let go of you super saiyan forms to return to base level, your breath trembles on exhale at the release of power. Goku treads across the floor to you and you come to meet him without hesitation, colliding together once more but in a furious exchange of kisses and hands pulling anywhere they can grab. You left no space between you with hands settling around his torso to hold him closer and his cradling your head in his large hands, leaving little chance for you to catch your breath. His skin already felt dry against your grip, most likely from the rising heat of his body upon transforming and you can smell the fragrant soap emanating from it's surface. The rough hands you would normally find around the small of your back by now clung to the back of your exposed thighs as you were lifted up in a single, effortless motion, propping your legs around his waist. This demeanor of his is different. Where you normally the lead, you find yourself following his actions, your legs looping at the ankles around him without thought.

Suddenly the wall is slam against your back, your hands pulled from his waist and held back by each side of your head. You gasp in a deep breath, chest continuing to heave for air as your surprised eyes looked up into the larger male's darker, commanding gaze. You feel your heart going wild in your chest, feeling smaller than you were under his eyes. "Promise to stop terrorizing my planet ...and I won't let you suffer." Goku brusque "warning" leaves your jaw hanging, only a resigned whimper betraying you when he pressed closer to you. "Got it?"

You collect your thoughts and swallow, raising your head to give the impression of looking down your nose at him. "Make me." you dared, managing to smirk again. "I can take anything you throw at me, earthling." You try to sound tough, but you hoped he would do just that. Anything. Once more your body betrays you as your thighs twitch around his hips in excitement for what's to come now.

He smirks back at you, "I figured you'd say that." You feel your back leave the wall but your hands still bound by his larger pair, more and more your lower body grows enticed to this authoritative motion. In no means were you so much weaker you couldn't shake yourself free of him, more so you were eager to see where he intends to go with this. You almost didn't want to fight back. Even his energy feels different to you. It is nothing like the passive ki you sensed when he was in the bath tub. Your eyes never leave his and you feel your collective weight fall into the mattress of your bed. Goku releases your hands finally and trace over the skin tight material down to your sides where he proceeds to mercilessly tickle at you beneath him. He has you trapped, your legs still around him and his body so close to you limiting any means to escape it.

You let out a holler of laughs, twisting violently beneath him and pulling whatever your hands could grab that would help you pull yourself free. "Ka- Kakarot I'll k-kill you...f-for this!" You managed to shriek out between your fits of uncontrolled laughter.

"You should have accepted surrender!" Goku teases, giving you a shit-eating grin. Your legs fall from his hips as you dig your booted heels against the bed to try to push away to no avail. He continues his assault, hands too strong and too quick to beat away. The most you could manage to do was twist around to your stomach and attempt to crawl while batting your tail at him.

"C'mon, say 'uncle'!"

"You a-ass! Th-This isn't f-fair!" You body continued to convulse at the tickling and your words just seemed to grow more broken up in your cackles.

"Say it!"

"S-STOP!"

"I'll only stop if you say it!"

"F-Fine! UNCLE! U-UNCLE!"

The saiyan male liberates you from his attack, leaving you to lie there a panting, grinning shame. How could you not expect this from him? This big goof. "I'm sorry, it was too good a chance I couldn't pass it up!" He giggles at you from a benevolent place before that switch appeared to go off in his head again and that good-natured innocent saiyan you knew disappeared into a sinful gaze. "Now let's get serious." As if you weren't feeling limp enough, a pressure bears down around your tail, eyes shooting wide at the sharpness that overcame your entire body. Goku lets up on his grip at the base of your tail just enough to divert any pain, leaving only the lack of control of your limbs. He is all too familiar with what a tight grip could do and he doesn't want you to hurt, just doesn't want you trying to wiggle away again. "Guess you're not as big a conqueror as you thought. You haven't even trained your tail." He coos, patronizing you for your weakness. "Guess you're nothin' but a big bully."

"A-Are you out of your mind?! Let go!" You gripe at him, though left silenced with a small whimper when he gives a light tug and raises your hips to settle your lower body on your knees. With what strength left in your body holding you there, he lets up his grip again. Goku runs a finger of his free hand along the stretched fabric clinging to you where it contours to your warmth, clit twitching on contact. His stroking circles between your entrance and your sensitive button making you bite your lip at the long awaited contact but jerk your head back to look at him trying to focus on the fact he has your tail in his grasp. "H-hey! Do you hear me?!" You see his eyes lift to yours and his lips curve into an almost devilish countenance, turning his gaze to his finger's handiwork and the saturated line of moisture growing in its pattern.

"You said you could take anything I throw at you, right?" He asks continuing to toy with you, switching from his finger to his thumb as he narrowed his motion to your clothed clit. Your entire lower body jerks back against it, wanting to follow the motion but trying to hold control until he withdraws his limb when he realizes your resolve. "What was that you were saying earlier? You were going to put me on my back?" His husky voice goads you on. Knowing full well there wasn't much left you could do with your tail in his trained hand and your drenched button twitching from stimulation, you almost consider taking your words back in this game. You watch him shift behind you, carefully positioned on his own knees between your legs and hear his towel fall loose and land beside your head, earning your eyes. In place of his fingers now, you feel the head of his erect cock press against your clit, exciting it all the more through the fabric. You mewl at the contact, dropping your head into the mess of sheets of pillows and pushing your hips back against him for more. You can feel you insides practically opening up for him, ready to take him in if not for your damned suit! Goku laughs a little, "You just say when you're ready to give up and I'll end your suffering." How can he still sound so in control teasing you like this?! He must have been sizing you up for this the moment he triggered his super saiyan form, conniving every step and reading your responses for the proper approach. Let it never be said Goku's wiles were not up to par with getting what he wanted, especially when he was confident he was going to come out on top.

God Damn it, Kakarot.

The not so subtle rubs of him against your entrance but denied by your clothes taunted you further. He knows exactly what he's doing when he's into it, a lesson you would not have thought you would come to regret if he was going to tease you like this. You try to tell your body you can endure more of this, but your insides are begging to be filled with him.

"Well?"

"....I'll...yield..." You relinquish your pride to your greedy, depraved core. You don't think you have ever been more turned on by him then you were right now. You regain control of your muscles once you feel all the pressure lift from your tail and it dangles at your side. A sigh of relief, you attempt to speak and lift yourself. "Kakarot, yo-", A keen shriek shoots from your throat when you feel the fabric pulled aside, exposing your moist privates, and how easily the head of his cock found its way inside, opening you up for the rest of him. Your entire core rattles with delight at the penetration. You should have known it was too good to be true. He was caving alongside you the whole time, waiting for your blessing to take you. Goku lets out a decadent groan as his length twitches feverish from the snug caress of your insides welcoming him, drawing himself in and out as he lets his control slip away.

"Took you long enough." He chokes back, stretching the fabric further away from your hole, his other hand guiding your hips back to suit his cock.

"J-Just shut up!" You still attempted to sound tough, though your voice was muffled by the sheet you had bitten down on as the pleasure ignited inside you. It already felt like you were edging towards your orgasm, you had to attempt to calm your overexcited nerves enough to enjoy the full ride. How easily your body accepted his length this time left you almost breathless. Already you can feel his hips bouncing off your ass, driving your lower body back with just one of his hands to meet his thrusts. There was no holding it back now considering how much he stirred you up. Your insides squeeze him all at once as a strained, euphoric squeal falls out of your throat. His rhythm slows in response, groaning as your twitchy insides only seem to pull him in to the hilt and grow all the more hotter around him. You hold yourself against him as the head of his cock nudges at your deep spot, rubbing together in your languid movements.

The strong hands of the saiyan reaches over to your frame and draws you up to hold you into the contour of his muscles, your back resting against his chest as you readjust your legs to accommodate the position. Goku wastes no time pulling the stretchy fabric down your shoulder, kissing the revealed skin to his content. With the lightest twist of your torso, you turn to meet his lips, reaching behind his head and taking a handful of his hair. He begins to quicken the grind of his hips into you again, a steady flow of deep thrusts in this new position you immediately rock yourself into.

"That all you got?" You prod, coherent enough to still provoke this "punishment" worthy of planetary invasion. Though intense and more gripping than ones before, you've endure much more than a single orgasm from him. There was more to go before all the fight is taken out of either of you. You feel his lips spread into a grin against yours, clearly taking the bait.

"I can go all out." He shamelessly declares, a fact you're both aware of, thrive on. You were creating a debauched monster and you intended to delight in every minute of it. Every moment he wraps you in his large arms and bears down on you to drive inch after inch into your core until it hurts, every curt and tactless word that falls out of his mouth inevitably reminding you of this carnal delicacy of a man who finds new ways to please you, every kiss..and beyond kissing. That alone stirred your arousal right back up. He wrestles control of your hips from you with both hands and begins plunging his cock against your spot again with enough momentum to knock you back into the sheets below. Each of your hands grip at the back of his head to anchor yourself from falling over, taking every bit of this lewd assault on your body with wanton sobs. "D-Don't..Don't stop!" You urged, attempting to bounce yourself back into his movements. Goku braces his forehead against the top of your skull, switching from holding your frame in his hands to wrapping his arms around your build and continuing to drive into you, rocking your entire body with a sharp and ungraceful cadence you could only interpret as his own orgasm creeping in. Your hold on his head grows stronger as your pleasure builds back up to the edge so soon, voice trembling. He lets out a tremulous groan behind you as he stills his hips inside you with a rough shove, hot cum gushing against the wild spasms of your insides. Deliriously you both ride out the shared euphoria until you sink further into his hold, these strong arms the only thing holding you up at the moment.

The larger saiyan leans against you, encouraging you to lie forward as his body follows, catching himself on his own hands and letting you slide off his expended cock before rolling over beside you. Your face is lost in a small bundle of sheets and pillows, body still quivering from it's ecstasy. You managed to turn your head towards him with a small gasp for air, the rise and fall of his chest as he draws for air making him look like he was worn out but you knew better. You extend a hand to touch face, turning his head to look at you. When your eyes meet you see a smile start to form in his features, that kindness returning to his eyes. At least until you narrow your eyes on him and slap your hand down across his cheek with the strength you could find from your exertion. Goku lets out a yelp of "Ows" and holds the reddening side of his face, downright confused as he looks back at you.

"Ow, geez! What was that for?!"

"You grab my tail again... I'm pulling a new one out of you through your throat." You huff, lifting yourself up enough to crawl over and lie across his chest. "Warn me before you do that next time."

"Y-Yeah.." He agrees, laughing as he continued to rub his cheek.

"U-Umm...Guys?" A voice emanates by your feet. You and Goku both look at each other in mirrored confusion before looking down to where the voice came from. By your feet you see only the old scouter barely hanging from the edge of the bed. A couple of voices come through, all turning your face a ghostly white as you stared at it wide-eyed. That's right, you never turned the scouter off. It was old but it was the exact some one you wore at the time Elder Kai scouted you for that special mission. The very one you synced with the systems of the Time Nest so the Kais, Trunks and His partner could communicate with you while out on a mission. You're pretty sure your heart just stopped in your chest.

"T-...Trunks?!" You answer hesitantly. The half saiyan responds in a tone similar to yours, wishing he could hide away from the things he heard but its clear now that you were all aware of each other now and everything that transpired between the communicators since you pressed that power button.

"I-I didn't mean to interrupt! J-Just thought you should know Supreme Kai of Time requests for you. Uh, whenever she and my partner can revive the Elder Kai," Trunks manages to report, ever embarrassed. Somewhere in the Time Nest lay the fainted elder kai with a heated face and a drip of blood hanging from his nose., Supreme Kai of Time and the former Toki Toki city hero doing their best to bring the elder back to consciousness.

Your brain is still trying to process what this was going to mean for you, but Goku began to laugh sheepishly, holding a hand to his head. "Well this is gonna be awkward, isn't it?"

#goku x reader #goku imagine #goku dbz #goku dbs #xenoverse 2 #Dragon Ball Z #dragon ball super #My writing

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somefinelipstickonthatpig · 4 years ago

Photo

rated: t

fandom: Tales of Symphonia

prompt: “Go Through Me” + Zelos/Colette/Lloyd

requested by: @greecllings

more modern-day!AU shenanigans because I got this idea in my head after a particularly great line in another, diff-fandom fanfic i was reading. now this is here.

i’m sorry.

thanks Josie for the request, though i’m 95% certain this scenario wasn’t what you had in mind when you first requested “get through me” with these three, so...sorry (again)

o - o - o

Schlemiel [Read on AO3]

o - o - o

Zelos frowns. “You’re sure he said to wait here?”

At Colette’s shrug, his frown deepens. Her thumbs fly across the screen of her cell. Zelos doesn’t know how she can see anything on that thing under the glaring light of the courtyard lamppost. “Yeah. Said he was on his way? He should be here in just a—”

“—hey, Colette!”

The voice that rings out is too loud for not being that far away.

Zelos turns and takes a good look at his theater classmate’s childhood friend. Colette talks about him a lot: the boisterous bundle of energy named Lloyd Irving who is apparently not her boyfriend. (Zelos is of the opinion that there’s a yet in those words somewhere.) Her stories she spins as they sit knee-to-knee doing warm-ups on stage are always wild, extremely silly, and very funny. To see the subject of those 4-wheeler wheelies and the self-proclaimed corn-husk king, who’s apparently a plain guy with spiky brown hair and a bright red university sweater, was almost a disappointment. Zelos had expected someone more…something.

“You must be Zelos,” Lloyd gives a breathless greeting and thrusts a hand out towards his chest. “Nice to meetcha.”

Zelos takes the proffered hand because he, unlike some of the people in front of him, was not raised in a barn. He makes a good show of flicking a long strand of red hair over his shoulder, sliding on a slow grin. “I see our sweet little Colette here has told you about me.”

Is that a smattering of pink dusting the guy’s cheeks? Geez, already? How are these two not dating yet if the mere mention of the other’s name makes them go all gooey-eyed and soft? “Yeah. I guess she has mentioned a thing or two about the funny redhead from her theater class before.”

Sharply, Zelos chokes. “Funny—?!”

Lloyd chuckles and is quick to release his hand and wrap it around one of his two ratty backpack straps. He swallows and looks over his shoulder. “Right. Well, uh, shall we head back?”

And then and all of a sudden, Colette’s head snaps up from her phone.

She stares at Lloyd with almost comically ginormous eyes. Zelos doesn’t get quite why until Colette waves for his attention and turns her phone screen to face him. Beaming in the night, surrounded by a green text message box from one heart-emoji-surrounded Lloyd (seriously?) are the white words: jhey, I think i mite be being follow.ed. just os you kno. sry.

Ah.

“Yes!” Colette says as soon as she pockets her phone. “C’mon! Yeah! Let’s, uh, let’s go to our dorms!”

The funny thing about being in a theater class with country bumpkin Colette Brunel is that the golden-headed tenderheart has the hardest time telling a convincing lie, so she’s actually very, very bad on stage—which is exactly why Zelos likes her. She is earnest and sincere and would never stab him in the back one day probably because she didn’t know which way to hold the damn knife.

Completely unlike him in every way.

Which is why when Colette says “our dorms,” Zelos immediately realizes two things: one, that Lloyd must not have the same scholarship he and Colette do because he isn’t bunking in Chosen Hall, and two, when Lloyd is asking if he can walk with them, it’s because he doesn’t feel safe heading back to his own dorms.

And all in the span of two seconds, Zelos knows what to do.

His grin widens.

“W-whoa, hey, what are you—”

“—shhh, play along,” Zelos purrs, arm snug around Lloyd’s waist as he flicks a glance over the guy’s shoulder. It was on his right Lloyd had looked earlier; there’s a figure leaning against a tree on their phone. Super casual, not anything unusual after nine on a college campus after night classes have just let out.

But Zelos remembers very well his own personal near-experiences.

With his arm around Lloyd, he turns him and guides him down the sidewalk towards his and Colette’s dorm. He sneaks another glance behind them in the form of a chaste kiss to Lloyd’s very, very red cheek.

After a beat, the stranger begins to follow.

Huh.

Colette is making strange, choked-off noises at his side and when he glances at her, he can see her face is as red as Lloyd’s sweater. Hell, she’s practically as red as Lloyd’s face. Zelos really is surrounded by the two most rural, suppressed idiots this side of the Tethe’alla-Sylverant continent divide, huh.

They aren’t even halfway to the dorms yet and the stranger tailing them still hasn’t taken a hint, so Zelos decides to do something fun.

“You trust me?” he whispers, leaning in close to Lloyd’s side. The guy’s been quiet as a mouse the entire walk, which is funny as hell because he’s known him for all of three minutes (if you don’t count Colette’s oddball stories) and he has a very good hunch his unusual silence is because he’s so far out of his element, he’s probably somewhere on Mars.

“N-no…?”

“Fair enough.”

Zelos spins him and pins him to the outer wall of the old university library. Colette squeaks. There’s an odd bump and arc to Lloyd’s figure with his backpack in the way. With one hand pressed to the brick at the level of Lloyd’s bewildered face and the other digging into the pocket of his white sweatpants, Zelos leans in.

“If you really want to ward ‘em off, you know what we should do.”

“Ex-fuckin’-scuse me?”

“Yes or no. Be quick.”

And then, Zelos has about two seconds to recognize the flash of determination set in Lloyd’s eyes for what it is before Lloyd clumsily grabs his face with both hands and pulls him in. At that moment, Zelos discovers another thing:

Lloyd’s never kissed before.

The guy’s real bad at it. Has no finesse whatsoever. Really messy with his lips and bumps his nose against Zelos’ as he tries to tilt his head at a better angle. Stinky breath; what, did he just stuff his mouth full of sour cream and onion chips during his late class or something? Disgusting. Salty. Actually, kinda addicting?

Weird.

Zelos tilts into it when Lloyd gives a tiny, hitched gasp. His nerves light up. Belatedly, he realizes that was his own fault—his fingers have curled into the skin of Lloyd’s hip, pushing up his sweatshirt until it bunches over the back of his hand.

When finally they break apart, breath hot against one another’s faces, Zelos turns his face to the side.

Whoever it was that was following Lloyd is gone.

Good. Didn’t want them to even reach our dorms, anyway.

“Zelos! Lloyd! Th-that was—”

Oh.

Zelos turns to his other side. He almost forgot Colette was there, but when he sees her, there are stars in her eyes. Like, near-legitimate stars. He’s never known blue could turn so cosmic at night, like spinning nebulas are spanning the length of her mind.

“What?” Zelos asks innocently, straightening up and pushing both hands in his sweatpants pockets, now. “You’ve seen me do that in class all the time, Colette.”

“Y-yeah, but—” Colette stutters and her face steams up again. She squeaks out, hands fisted in front of her collar, “—not with my best friend!”

Oh.

Yeah.

There was that.

“That was…” She tries again, but seems to be at a loss for words. When Colette looks to Lloyd, Lloyd looks back at her, dazed and still so, so red.

Actually, to hell with it. Red looks great on him.

“Well, it worked, so you’re welcome.” Zelos shrugs. “Successfully delivered the age-old, ‘you’ll have to go through me,’ and ‘this one’s taken,’ message across to that creep, for what it’s worth. They shouldn’t bother you again, but if they do…well, you know who to reach out to.”

“Thanks,” Lloyd murmurs.

Zelos takes a step back and bows extravagantly.

“We should, uh…” Lloyd looks around at this side of campus—probably unfamiliar to him—and scratches the back of his head. “We should keep going, right? Your guys’ dorm is further on. Colette, are you sure you’re fine if I…?”

“What? Yeah—yes. That’s fine! I still have your toothbrush from last time.”

Oh, to be young and in love and so dumb as to not even realize it.

“Do you, um—” Colette breaks off and if possible, her face is even redder. “Zelos, would you want to come with us?”

“Uh, I have to.” Zelos gives Colette a funny, patient look. “We’re in the same dorm hall, honey.”

“Oh—no—yes—of course—but I mean—”

And then it dawns on Zelos in that funny, crawling kind of way. Slowly, like the first rays of the sun as it peeks over the horizon. And then it warms him, starting from some point in the center of the top of his head and spreading down across his skin and low to his feet and he hedges out a laugh that’s as bewildered as it is—admittedly—just a bit flustered.

“You want me to crash your little slumber party?” he asks with a lifted brow. She can’t be serious.

Colette says, “You wouldn’t be crashing it!” at the same time as Lloyd finally catches on and bursts, “Hey, yeah! That’s a great idea! Colette’s got a corner room to herself and the bottom bunk’s a futon that can fold out and it’s really comfy. C’mon, Zelos. You’ll love it!”

Zelos has every idea that these two oblivious fools are going to be the death of him.

But then he finds himself somehow—incredibly—nodding—and he supposes he must be the biggest fool of all. Is he actually agreeing to this?

“Yay!” Colette cheers and claps her hands and Zelos supposes he is.

How did he get here?

#bad things happen bingo #bthb #symphonia #lloyd irving #colette brunel #zelos wilder #fanfic: lloyd #fanfic: colette #fanfic: zelos #get through me #this is supposed to be angsty but uh #i guess the tone got away from me #threat of danger but zelos is here #and i love these three v much #mod krissey #mod krissey writes a thing

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lovemesomesurveys · 5 years ago

Text

Would/Do you like having brown eyes? Meh. I wish I had blue or green, honestly. Do you spend a lot of time on the internet? I sure do. Could you live without the internet? Well yeah, but I wouldn’t enjoy it. Have you bought anyone a Christmas gift? Yes, many. I love buying gifts for my family. Do you have a Christmas tree in your house now? I have a mini one in my room. I said I was going to put my decorations away this year (they were up all year last year), but I have yet to do so. :X

How do you feel when someone hates on Apple? I’m an Apple gal, so. Do you have an Iphone? If so, which one? Yeah, an iPhone XR. Favorite flavor of jello? I don’t like jello. I see. Do you have long toes? No. What is one of your favorite compliments to recieve? I don’t receive compliments all that often, so any is nice. Even though I’m awkward af. Do you compliment other random people? No. Could you see yourself buying a truck as your go to vehicle? No. What kind of car do you want? Something less than $100,000. I don’t know. I don’t even drive, so. What kind of gift would you appreciate for your birthday? I appreciate any gift I receive. Can you type fast? Yes. Can you type without looking at the letters? Yep. Did you take typing classes? Yeah, my freshman year in high school. It was required. What do you use Facebook for? That’s about as social as it gets for me, ha. Even though I don’t interact much with anyone apart from liking or reacting in some way to posts. I at least can see what others are up to. What do you look like in your profile picture? On Facebook? It’s a photo of my mom, brother, and I at Disneyland. I’m wearing a pistachio green Disneyland hoodie, a rose gold Disney hat, and my hair is in a low side pony tail. Do you love cartoons? I like the ones from my childhood. Name a band that you like. There’s several, but fine I’lll name 2 that instantly came to mind: Linkin Park and Coldplay. Name a genre of music you don't like? EDM, techno, clubhouse music. What genre of music do you listen to around the house? My main Spotify playlist has a shitload of songs of various genres. You think it's wrong to tell a person ____. Anything mean and hurtful. What kind of compliments have you given? Uhhh usually about something they’re wearing or an accessory they have. Would you rather give or receive? Give. Do you paint your own nails? It’s been a few years since I’ve painted my nails. Do you like acrylic nails? I’ve never had them. What is your favorite red lipstick? I don’t have a favorite. Red lipstick is nice, but I haven’t worn any lipstick in such a long time. What are your favorite colors to wear? I wear a lot of black, but I like some pops of color. What colors do you NOT wear? Brown and neon. Where do you shop for most of clothes? Hot Topic, BoxLunch, and Kohl’s. What are you favorite clothing stores/shops? ^^^ What kind of shoes do you like? Adidas. Describe your style in one word. Comfy casual, ha. Describe your current personality in one or two words. Awkward. What is your opinion on weed? I think it has a lot of benefits. Are you afraid of child birth/pregnancy? Child birth sounds rather unpleasant. What are you favorite bottoms to wear? Leggings. They’re all I wear. Do you like dresses? I haven’t worn a dress in years. Would you rather be called a geek, a nerd or a dork? I’m all of those. Do you eat cake with a spoon or a fork? Usually a fork, but a spoon works as well. What age will you be next? 31. Did you graduate high school? Yes. Do you make youtube videos? If so, leave your URL. No. Do you flat iron your hair? I haven't in years. What physical features do you wish you had? ( name 2 ). Nice teeth/smile and blue or green eyes. Would you ever get plastic cosmetic surgery? If it were for reconstructive purposes. Ever broken a bone? Yeah. What are you favorite youtube videos to watch? Lots of ASMR, but also some vloggers and lifestyle/entertainment videos. What is your favorite sex position? ;) I wouldn’t know. What color will you paint your nails next? I don’t plan on painting my nails anytime soon. It’s been years since the last time. What is one of your favorite Disney movies? Alice in Wonderland. If you could meet a real life Disney character who would it be? Haha I get so excited meeting the characters at Disneyland. I’m such a kid. And a dork. Are you afraid of ghosts/hauntings? Well, there are evil spirits and that’s scary. Do you like to play computer games a lot? I like playing the Sims. I go through periods where I’m obsessed and play all the time and then not play for a long time. I last played over a year ago. Are you a sore loser? No. What is your favorite game to play with family/friends? I love board games. What is your beer of choice? I don’t drink anymore, but I was never fond of beer. What do you plan to buy next? Food. Do you like shopping? Yeah. Online shopping, especially. What is one of your favorite things to do on the weekend? I don’t do anything different. Here, I'm giving you $500 dollars to one store, where would you spend it? Hmmm. I’d have to think about it. Would you look good in a Beetle car? I wouldn’t want one. Do you play slug bug? I did when I was a kid. You know, it’s been forever since I’ve seen one. I feel like I saw them all the time and then they just disappeared. What kind of computer are on? MacBook Air. You are attracted to ___. Alexander Skarsgard. Do you like glitter? It’s pretty, but also a huge pain. Have you ever owned a Ouija board? Noooo. I don’t mess with stuff like that. Do you like to text? Over talking on the phone, yeah. I’m not a big texter, though. If you had to be an animal for Halloween, what would it be? A cat. Do you have more dry skin or oily skin? Dry. What kind of shampoo do you use? Be specific. It’s a salon shampoo for red dyed hair. Do you have acne? I get a couple pimples once in awhile. I used to get it a lot when I was a teenager and in my early 20s. You're glad that you don't ___. have school anymore. You're glad that you do ___. have my family. Your favorite cuss word? I don’t have a favorite. Are you obsessed with any superheros? I love Marvel films. Do you read comic books? No. Do you like the Sunday paper and why or why not? I used to when I was a kid cause I liked reading the comics. I haven’t read an actual newspaper in yearssss. I mostly read the news online, but I also watch it on TV. Do you have cable? Yeah. What's a show you wish that was still on air? True Blood. Do you listen to the radio at all? I haven’t in quite a long time. My parents and brother play their Spotify in their cars (and I’m in their cars). Do you like hip hop? Yeah. Do you like pretzels? Soft pretzels with cheese are good. Do you like snow? Yesss. What's your favorite thing about your favorite season? Name the season. I love fall and winter. Everything about it is lovely. Name something that starts with the first letter of your first name. Snacks. Name something that starts with the first letter of your middle name? I don’t wanna. And your lastname. Fruit. Do you have pets? If so, what and what are their names? Yes, I have a 3 year old German Shepherd/Lab mix named Princess Leia. Are you a religious person? Yes. Do you like pina coladas? I’ve never had one. Do you like coconut scents? Yeah. What is your favorite Bath and Body Works candles? Their autumnal ones. Would you spend 20 dollars on a candle? Nooo. What is the goriest thing you've seen in real life? Roadkill. Do you look in the mirror a lot? Nooo. I avoid it as much as possible. When I do, I keep it short. What brand of toothpaste do you use? Sensodyne. What is a dessert that you DON'T like? Pie or pudding. And one that you love? Cheesecake, cupcakes, brownies, donuts, and muffins. Twilight or Harry Potter? I liked both. Would you rather be a vampire or a mermaid? Vampire I guess. Do you have a favorite number? 8. Had a crush on somebody that every1 around u thought was ugly? I mean, I’ve found people attractive that my friends didn’t and vice versa. We all have different tastes. Are you happy with your physical features? No. P.E or Math? Ew, neither. Math or Science? Neither. Creative Writing or Art? Creative writing. When you doodle, what are you usually doodling? Usually hearts and random words in cursive. What is something that you like that is really cheap in price? Ramen? Haha. Like the packs you get at the grocery store for less than a dollar. What is something that you like that is kind of expensive? Apple products. Those aren’t kind of expensive, they’re hella expensive. What do you do when someone is really rude to you in public? I wouldn’t do anything towards them, I’d just talk a lot of crap later ha. Do you argue with your significant other a lot? I’m single. Have you ever had a really painful breakup? Yes. Which is better smoking or vaping? Neither. Do you write in print or cursive? Print. Do you have neat handwriting? No. My handwriting is awful. What do you like to write with? Pens. Do you keep a journal/diary? This is it. Do you eat salads? What do you like in your salad? If you do. If not, what is 1+1? I like them, but it’s honestly been a few years since I’ve had one. Anyway, I just like lettuce, spinach, shredded cheese, olives, croutons, green onions, carrots, and hard boiled eggs with ranch on top. Back when I could eat spicy food I would add pepperoncinis and/or cayenne pepper. If you HAD to change your eyecolor, what would you change it to? Blue or green. What is one of your favorite colors? Rose gold. Do you prefer to be pale or tan? Don't say in between. I’m very pale due to anemia, malnutrition, and I like never go out in the sun. I wish I were tan. I used to be. Favorite thing to do on your phone? YouTube, Spotify, Twitter, Facebook, Snapchat, Instagram, Kindle, and play some games. What magazines do you like? I don’t read any. What is your favorite book? I couldn’t possibly choose just one. What is your favorite thing about Christmas? Everything. I love Christmastime. I'm giving a ticket to wherever you want, where would you go? Oh man. I’d really think about that before making a choice. Here's $5, what do you do with it? Put it towards food later. Cool. Cool. Favorite flavor of Ice Cream? Strawberry. Least favorite flavor of ice cream? Chocolate. Do you prefer white or black electronics? Uhhh depends. What is your favorite deodorant? I use Secret. Are you a good kisser ( make out )? Probably not. I’d be very rusty now....it’s been a long time. A stranger comes up to you and gives you a big hug, what do you do? Uh, I’d quickly back away and be extremely uncomfortable. I’d be like wtf? That would catch me completely off guard. Do your eyes tear up when you're nervous? Sometimes. Have you ever gotten the shakes in public? Yes. What do you like to order from Starbucks? Usually a caramel macchiato or a white chocolate mocha, but I do enjoy some of their seasonal drinks. Vanilla or Chocolate? Vanilla. Apples or Bananas? Bananas. Fruit or Veggies? I don’t eat much of either one. :X Water or Milk? Water. Regular Milk or Chocolate Milk? Ew. Would you milk a cow given the chance? No. What kind of underwear do you like? Hipster/hip huggers whatever you wanna call ‘em. Where do you shop for your underwear? A few different places. Chicken or Fish? Chicken. I hate seafood. Firm pillow or soft pillow? Soft, but firm. What are you wearing when you go to sleep? Leggings and an oversized shirt. That’s all I wear now all the time. Do you take any meds? If so which and why? Pain medication.

#personal #text #survey #surveys

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pkmntrainergreyze · 6 years ago

Text

Sleep (Mikey Way x Reader)

Tried making this short. Noticed most of my stories are 1k to 2k words so…

I know it’s late and I don’t celebrate Valentine’s, but please know that you are loved, no matter what day it is ❤

———

(Y/n) fell flat on Mikey’s guestroom bed. Her eyes conveyed smudged dark concaves. Her features yelled her fatigue, yet even at 6 am she couldn’t sleep.

She wriggled in his provided skimpy blanket. Not one comfy position. She shut her eyes and awaited for a truant wave of drowsiness. No luck.

She whimpered.

She hooked her nails deep on her bestfriend’s pillow. Her footsteps resonated while she strutted down the silent hall.

“Mikey…” She whispered.

The blonde, who was previously watching Netflix, craned his neck. He looked youthful, he could be easily mistaken as a nineteen year old. She’s quite jealous. Nothing can disturb her more than the fact there is no sign of sleep deprivation in him. Except for the stench of coffee oozing when he talks, most agreed it’s part of his charisma.

“Yeah?” He asked, not moving from the couch.

“I can’t sleep” She pouted.

He scoffed and raised an eyebrow. Oh really? No shit.

He continued navigating his movie options.

“Don’t look at the clock, read books, or something. I don’t know. I’m still not Quora or Yahoo Answers… Zzzz…”

He began the fifth episode of The Umbrella Academy, gambling time to support both Gabriel and his brother’s comic’s Netflix adaption.

His response did not please (Y/n) nor was she offended. She developed full immunity against his unhelpful remarks. She tried them all in the past, in addition to chamomile tea and coloring books, but none kicked it.

Miracles and concerts can possibly make her sleep, but Mikey’s list? That ain’t it, chief.

She sat beside him and rested her head on top of his shoulder. He pretended to remain unfazed and skipped the episode’s intro.

‘This was just what bestfriends do at slumber parties’ he supposed.

He gulped.

‘Alarmingly, slumber parties with (Y/n) invited means no sleeping nor party. Instead of putting her to sleep. I’ll be awake till 6am’

Mikey snaked his hand around her waist. He learned the hard way that Movies intensifies her insomnia so he placed a pillow above his lap, prompting her to lay there as he turned the TV off.

He combed her hair with his slender calloused fingers. This always relaxed her, and step one is always comfort.

“How do you sleep?” She asked yet again, like every other night she calls.

“I close my eyes and don’t think” If Mikey sounded monotone, then he’s robotic now.

“You know I can’t do the last part…” (Y/n) muttered.

“Then I’ll have to tire you out by thinking a lot”

“Wait, so you’re saying that unicorns aren’t real cause it’s not in bible?” He whisper-yelled. The outburst raised her eyebrow, but nothing she ain’t used to.

Reluctantly, she answered “Umm yeah, and there’s no actual records of horses with a horn and a lion’s tail”

He scoffed “Bullshit. The Englishmen have documented and seen shit”

“Sorry to burst your bubble sweetie, do me a favor and buy a Merriam English dictionary. It’ll clearly state it’s an imaginary animal”

Sweetie.

She called me sweetie.

That’s so adorable—

His face hardened. No. Unicorns, Mikey. Think Unicorns. Be the sass princess middle school girl you truly are.

“Unicorns aren’t real Mikey” He mocked (he really only had the confidence to say this after punching poor Ryan)

“Who are you? Mr Ross from AP Chemistry?” He referred to the Professor who argued the same point (Y/n) had.

She shook her head in disappointment “Better than a mid-twenties man who still watches My Little Pony”

He bobbed his head “Yeah, you got me”

She blinked a couple of times and pinched her cheek roughly. A load of air piled in her lungs as she began to shake.

“Did you just—” She gawked “Did you just smirked?!”

His face solidified “No.”

“I swear I saw you smiled just earlier” She exhaled in disbelief.

“For twelve straight years I thought you were a robot!” She placed a hand on her mouth and proceeded to muffle her squeal.

He may look calm and ready but inside he’s as nervous as teenagers on remedial exams. Not now. Damn it, he’s saving that grin for a special occassion! This is so anticlimactic.

Fuck! What to do, what to do.

His caffeinated eyes rambled everywhere. The television, his remote, the poster Gerard superglued in his kitchen and a spectroscopic dust became the most intriguing items in the planet. It was amusing, especially for (Y/n) who counted the unbreakable strike now shattered in both their faces.

Suddenly, with fidgety hands the younger Way lifted and carried her to bed. Course, she didn’t complain, she opted it as a sign of weakness and forfeit and talked nonstop. She’d be lying if she said this didn’t caused her internal butterflies to flutter, but who’s asking?

He gently laid her down the bed. Before she could sit down and mock him more, he snatched her wrists and pushed her down.

“Alright” He said shakily “H-hate to break it to you (Y/n), but you’ve been lucid dreaming this whole time and you know it”

She giggled “No I’m not—

Mikey plastered the pillow to her face, almost suffocating her. Or maybe that was the point?

“Go. To. Sleep.” He whispered to her free ear “You’re dreaming (Y/n), wake up!”

She sounded like she was saying “but!”, but it was muffled.

“Shh…” He removed his grip and scooted beside her “Sleep.”

She rolled her eyes. There’s no way he’d let her speak. She knew whenever Mikey puts his mind on something he can accomplish anything. This is one of those scenarios.

Then again, she does feel tired… Quite the shocking rumor huh?

There she is, looking like a drop dead porcelain doll in Mikey’s arms, more artistic than a Franz Anton Bustelli masterpiece.

His eyes batted at the realization of burden close to his chest. He can’t move. She looks exceptionally peaceful in his arms, and there’s no alternate universe in which he’ll pass the opportunity not to absorb her features. In fact, in the first two minutes there’s a list of details in his head already.

And those little things gravitated his face a kissing meter away from her.

He shut his eyes. This is it. The moment he shook, daydreaming about for so long he can barely remember the beginning of this fantasy.

Their first kiss.

The situation felt so good to be true. Just a peck and he’d he satisfied.

He flinched.

No.

It wouldn’t feel right sealing her first kiss when she’s asleep.

It would be his first kiss and her goodnight sleep.

He considered it long before he seperated himself tenderly, and replaced a pillow for her to snuggle. This night isn’t about him, it’s about her, and if he had to wait long for her to sleep, then he had to wait longer for their kiss.

Believe me, that was an excruciating decision. It’s so easy to entice his temptation that he nearly did both him and her dirty.

But it was the best thing to do.

It’s 2am, birds are already warbling outside and the aroma of coffee is as strong as yesterday. On Mikey’s path out of the room, he casted his gaze to (Y/n)’s face one last time. He scowled.

“I’d rather let her see me smile than no one at all”

—-

Why do i reference my old fanfictions? I don’t know either

BUT THE UMBRELLA ACADEMY MAN, WATCH IT. I’m trash for the comics so much that I will take whatever crap happened in the Netflix Adaption

Update: I finished it. So good. There are tons of changes from what I read from the comicscbut still a series worth watching. Plus, we get to see more of Ben and Delores unlike the comics :D

Trust me, it’s good

P.S:

I know it’s a shameless self promotion but I’ve busied myself making a The Umbrella Academy [mainly the apocalypse suite] in a nutshell video.

So far I’m just in the introduction:

https://youtu.be/miQzxV2IPtg

#mikey way #mikey way x reader #my chemical romance #gerard way x reader #gerard way #electric century #imagines #mikey way imagines #mikey way imagine #imagine #my chemical mikey

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kootenaygoon · 5 years ago

Photo

So,

The Nelson Daily had scooped us.

It was a Thursday morning at the Star and we were right in the thick of production day when I saw a new story pop up in my social media feed: a local pot dispensary had been evicted from two different locations, and now the owners were noisily complaining about it. The main photo featured proprietor Kyle Lindroos and some other guy I didn’t recognize, striking defiant poses as they held up their eviction notice to the camera. I’d been sitting on my hands for months when it came to pot reporting, and now somebody had beaten me to it.

“You see this, about this pot dispensary getting evicted?” I asked Greg.

“Apparently the cops can’t actually arrest them or fine them or anything, so they just lean on the landlords until they kick them out.”

Greg smirked. “That’s one way to do it.”

Though Nelson was considered the weed capital of B.C., the topic wasn’t raised much around the Star office. My habitual pot smoking was a secret, though it wasn’t exactly well kept. I’m sure Tamara and Calvin had each smelled it on me at least once, but neither had said anything. Greg had grown up in the Slocan Valley, where weed was ubiquitous, but he was a teetotaler himself. He explained to me one afternoon that his mind was so precious to him that he hated the idea of anything compromising it, be that alcohol or drugs. That didn’t make him pro-pot or anti-pot, it just meant there was a realm of experience he was choosing not to have.

I wondered if those experiences were really worth it, if I really believed in the way I was living my life. I told myself cannabis stoked my creative fires and helped me navigate my depression, but I was starting to experience some pretty nasty side effects too. I wished I had more control.

When it came to actually reporting on the issue, I was well poised. I’d developed a relationship with Phil McMillan, who loved to stand outside his club and tell long-winded jokes that ended with him doubling over with laughter. He was an excellent source of gossip, and had stories reaching back decades. The dude was mountainous, with cigarette-stained teeth, a grey-streaked beard and a pony tail. I described him as a benevolent yogi that didn’t actually do yoga. I’d approached him a few times to see if he was interested in doing a Star story in the lead up to legalization, and every time he told me the same thing: he had a comfy arrangement with the cops as long as he flew under the radar, and that’s what he intended to do. It had been working for him since 1999, and he wasn’t going to change things up now.

Then Kyle Lindroos blew up the radar. The guy was so far out of his depth it was hard to decide whether it was comic or tragic, especially because he was obviously throwing himself into the endeavour with such earnest abandon. He had begun using cannabis after injuring himself on the job, and was now passionate about sharing it with the world. And he wasn’t just offering plain old weed; he also had edibles, tinctures and a variety of other extracts. According to him, this was all motivated by a passion for health care. To prove this he showed me his tattoo of the Egyptian alchemist god Thoth, which also featured flakes of weed being transformed into liquid gold.

He called out Nelson’s secretive culture.

“We all pretend it doesn’t exist, which creates a terrible dynamic. Everybody isn’t being up front like in the rest of the world, where they’ve realized pot is no big deal. Here in the Kootenays we’re still holding onto prohibition, which is weird,” he said.

“I’ve been traveling around Canada trying to educate people about extracts, edibles. I’ve been providing services for the past three years.”

As we were copy-editing the following issue a few days later, with the cannabis story running on the front cover, I watched as Ed read it over at his desk. He sighed multiple times, scratching out typos and circling errors. He reached the part about Kyle’s tattoo, and read it out loud to Tamara. He chuckled to himself. Once he was finished he came over to go over his notes.

“This kid sounds like quite the character,” he said. “So you actually went in this place when it was open?”

“Oh, it was ridiculous. He’s just some pot dealer who had two grand for rent. Total gong show.”

“There’s going to be more places like this coming. This could end up being one of those stories that keeps on giving.”

“Seems to me like everyone’s aiming to elevate their game now. There’s a new dispensary coming to Front Street that’s supposed to be super corporate-looking, like being in a McDonald’s or something.”

Ed pursed his lips. “I wonder what the accepted protocol is about doctor’s notes, and getting access. Is it exclusively medicinal at these establishments?”

I shrugged. “Medicinal or recreational, I don’t actually think it makes much difference. I mean technically these places are supposed to require some sort of paperwork, but in reality I think it’s pretty laissez-faire.”

“As this develops, it would be nice to understand the nuances around that. I think that’s the big question most people have, is are they just handing this stuff out to anyone who walks in off the street? What rules are they following?”

“Well, they don’t sell to anyone underage obviously. But even that, I dunno. Like Kyle was pretty much just selling to whoever. He wasn’t even pretending to have a verification process or anything.”

Ed nodded. “That’s potentially why he was targeted, then.”

“Oh, totally. I mean Phil’s been running his shit without any sort of conflict or interference for years now, and it’s because he knows how to keep his nose clean and toe the line with the cops. Everyone else just needs to figure out how to fall in line.”

At that time individual U.S. states were beginning to legalize cannabis, starting with Washington and Colorado, and there was a sense in the community that we were being left behind. If Canadians could cross over the border to a more developed market, then Nelson would be losing its pot tourism to the south just as Deb Kozak had predicted during the municipal election. That being said, she wasn’t being especially vocal on the industry’s behalf, choosing instead to distance herself from the topic completely. (”I’m not the pot mayor,” she said.) That seemed like a strategic move to me, like she was playing politics, and it felt like a betrayal to the voters who had hoped she was going to be their champion. I decided I wasn’t going to let these authority figures hide behind secrecy and silence anymore -- this shit was happening, right in front of our faces, and it seemed silly not to acknowledge it. Not only that, Herb Couch had correctly pointed out that the local police policy on cannabis had potentially far-reaching implications for a huge number of citizens, including our youth. This wasn’t just an issue relevant to growers and dealers, but also consumers. If the city was going to embrace a certain approach, I wanted to make sure it was being scrutinized thoroughly.

When I reached out to the NPD for comment, Holland deferred to his deputy chief Paul Burkart. He was a towering bald soccer coach with a quick smile and a firm handshake, a local boy with daughters at the high school. I could tell he was trying to be as open-minded and progressive as he could be, but it was clear that he was frustrated by the new influx of dispensaries and unclear about how exactly to deal with them. It certainly wasn’t a police responsibility to regulate a new market, but they also didn’t want people slinging pot willy nilly. This latest tactic of using landlords to evict dispensaries would only work for so long, and he said at times it felt like they were that little Dutch boy from the parable, the one blocking a flood with his finger in the dike. Not only that, who wanted to waste time on policing pot when they were already being stretched to capacity dealing with both the mental health and opioid crises?

“My editor Greg says these places are popping up like Starbucks,” I said. “And sooner or later it’s pretty obvious we’re going to have to come up with a better long-term plan.”

Burkart sighed. “Somebody, it won’t be us, will have to come up with regulations. They’ll have to explore the fees, the rules. That’s exactly what Vancouver is looking to do now.”

“How quickly do you think that will happen?”

“Things don’t move very fast with the government, so it might be a while before we see any real movement. In the mean-time they’ve kind of left us holding the bag.”

When the interview was over, I asked Burkart a few additional questions. I wanted to make sure I had a proper lay of the land. I told him I knew about three dispensaries: the compassion club run by Phil, this evicted one run by Kyle, and Niles’ operation. Was that all of them? Did he know how many more were coming, and where they would open? He told me they were hoping to keep them off Baker Street, but he wasn’t sure they’d be able to successfully do that. He hadn’t heard of any others, but it was clear that there were many in the works.

“We’re just going to have to see how this plays out,” he said.

The Kootenay Goon

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argaliaofficial · 7 years ago

Text

i started typing this earlier but then had to go to work so now im just gonna finish it so i get it off my chest

back when i was with my first ex, meg, we went to this private christian school i prolly made a post about this on here before but its topical right now i didnt sleep at all and im tired enough to spill my fucking guts out some more

so anyway we went to this private christian school and thats when it happened. ive honestly repressed a lot of my time there i was not doing great but what i do remember just makes me feel sick. like, meg aside, the school just sucked.

for context the way it was set up was that we had “placement tests” to see where we were in subjects like math and english, and however we did made us get placed in PACEs according to our skill level. in theory this is fine i suppose, but the thing was that there were no alternatives to the PACEs.

PACEs were part of the learning curriculum of our school which was ACE- Accelerated Christian Learning. they were basically little study pamphlets that went over instructions on how to learn certain subjects and whatnot, while also having a christian perspective on things. scripture verses were abundent in them, and they had like a continuous series of comics going in there about their character Ace Virtuson and friends.

Along with the PACEs, the classrooms were set up like an “office” of sorts with cubicles that you sat in. For me honestly that was one of the many hells because it was so cramping and clinical and I just do not learn well in that sort of environment. so you’d sit quietly for like 8 hours a day with occassional breaks with nothing but your PACE pamphlets to work on. you couldnt speak to any body, and if you needed help, there was a flag system in place where you’d put a flag up and have to sit around and wait for a teacher to come assist you, and usually their assistance only lasted briefly because theres countless OTHER students to get to, and nepotism is a thing and if they dont like you or think of you as a problem kid, you’re less likely to get the aid you need.

i was one of those problem kids.

early on, i could manage that set up when my work was easier, but when i hit “high school age” and got into more advance work i began to suffer horribly. it didnt help that at this time, i got with meg, but less about her right now and more about how this school system fucking failed me and others tbh

i do not learn by reading information. at least, i dont retain it. i need to discuss with people, with my peers and professors. i need one on one sometimes, especially with math- my biggest struggle. but how the school was set up made that sort of learning almost impossible. your peers were all at different levels, so group discussion was rare. their were attempts, but they never lasted long, and the extent of the help basically surmounted to the teachers just reading what the PACEs already said and vaguely explaining more, and that blew.

so, me, being a hands on group learner who has to talk and listen to even retain information and needs to be allowed to move around often instead of being cramped up, started to fall behind in my studies. badly. and of course, instead of the teachers trying to asses WHY it was you were falling behind, you got written up and had to have your parents sign a slip. you could get written up for a few things and these were always detentions of sorts. usually they were lunch but if you were bad enough you’d get an after school one. i accumulated these almost once a day and after a while i got tired of having my parents sign them EVERY SINGLE day and just forged their signatures. i got away with that like 75% of the time lol

like they were just for the same shit ‘oh ur kid didnt do their homework blah blah ur kids out of dress code blah blah” and so i was just “whatever” because like... nothing seemed to change i was just being perpetually punished for being unable to keep up in my studies. my parents tried to get a math tutor for me but halfway thru i think freshman year she moved and that was that

i got so fucking sick of just being behind while my other peers seemed to be moving forward that i started bullshitting my work just to get thru. ofc that didnt do anything because i wasnt learning the work, and because i lied about my answers and cheated i got punished again. and i was just like “whatever”

i cried all the time. parent teacher conferences were hell. i always cried. it felt like i couldnt convey to them why i was such a fuckup. like i wasnt making sense, or i was being overemotional. instead of trying to make changes they just talked about how i had to work harder. least i think. i’ll be honest i always just disassociated during those meetings before going into meltdown mode.

on top of that, i was in a “gay” relationship with a classmate, and lots of bad stuff happened. ive always had an overactive imagination. great for being a wannabe artist. not so great when youre already an easily manipulated undiagnosed autistic child. me, her, and my current gf actually had our own little world! thinking back on this now, for me at least it was escapism to try and just cope with how miserable i was at school

i dont know how soon in the “relationship” it was before things got sexual. my concept of time during those years at foursquare is so scattered. according to posts ive seen on dA me and her were together or at least “friends” for 2 years? so actually i think my saying “freshman year in high school” is inaccurate and things got bad the tail end of middle school and continued until i was a sophomore before switching schools.

ANYWAY, so yeah, along with all this school nonsense, i was in a gay relationship, one that was abusive in many aspects. ofc at the time i didnt know that i was being abused! i just thought yknow her forcing herself into me sexually was kinda par the course and i was already kinda a sexually curious kid growing up so like.. i was looking for that i guess? it hurting cuz she went in dry is just to be expected, yadda yadda. pretty sure i cried? and i know for a fact that i still sleep in the room where she raped me like that and its sometimes just “yea i was literally right in that spot when i was raped lol”

and she would constantly want me to touch her sexually too, and when i said “no” and pulled my hand away that she had been trying to force down her pants because i wasnt personally ready to do that she’d always complain and make me feel bad cuz i wasnt comfortable touching her. “i always get you off but you never get me off!”

and at the time i didnt just tell her to fuck off cuz i didnt know any better. i didnt know that it was ok for me to not be ready to do that. i thought i was a bad person for not being ready to pleasure my partner, even tho its not my fault if shes ok w/ pleasuring me, and im ok with being pleasured (even tho tbh it was hit or miss sometimes she just did it lol), but im not ready to touch her, i guess? and like i tried to communicate with her and im pretty sure i told her that if she didnt wanna jerk me off cuz i couldnt do it to her yet that was fine but whatever

on the fourth of july she started groping me out in public while we watched the fireworks and i remember trying to get her to stop cuz i wasnt comfy with doing this in public cuz a) this was years ago and homophobia was a lot more common especially in this boonies town and b) i dont like seeing other couples being handsy in public so i dont want to be handsy in public either

and i remember while shes groping my chest and im trying to get her to stop theres this group of older kids in front of us and they see. and they start snickering. they started snickering at the sight. and i was so mortified and wanted to die.

looking back those kids should get hit by a fucking bus for laughing at someone getting molested and being obviously uncomfortable with it but i guess its funny cuz “lesbians! haha look at that pervy lesbo touching that other lesbian!”

and thats the story of why every fourth of july i want to kill myself

things kept progressing, ofc. i remember one night, while we were camping, i finally caved and fingered her. i forced myself to think “yeah ok i can do this” and i just thought the crippling anxiety i felt was cuz i was nervous to be intimate with my girlfriend for the first time like this, but really i was probably scared she was gonna hurt me since by that point she had. she had made herself perfectly clear in her mannerisms and tone of voice that she was stronger and bigger than me and could hurt me.

and a few occasions she did. one time she started choking me so badly that i honestly thought “oh my god, shes going to kill me here at school”. i still sometimes feel her nails digging into my throat, and i dont think ive ever been as terrified in my life as i was in that moment. i dont think she would have stopped had a teacher not intervened.

there was only one time i ever hit her, and that was before school started, and i had finally lost my shit over how much she kept fucking with me. all i remember was i came to school angry at her. over what i dont remember. she was always toying with my emotions, and i think that it had built up over the time that i finally snapped walked into class before school started, walked over to where she and alyss were talking, and a slapped her across the face before i walked over to my desk

i dont think i got in trouble for that cuz no one snitched? idk i mightve, but i didnt care. i was angry at her, angry at the school, and suicidal.

i remember one time during a break i was crying. a teacher from another class came up to me and asked what was wrong. i told her i wanted to die. she just looked at me all uncomfortable. i think she mightve said something before walking off?

nothing came of that.

i was more worried that i would get in trouble for being in a gay relationship than as apposed to thinking that these teachers- people who are supposed to protect their students- would help me. i gave up on them even recognizing the signs of me being abused. i feel like they wouldnt have even taken it as seriously as we were both “girls”, and this was back before talk of how women can be abusive was more common place. abuse was still strictly seen as male on female violence. and to some people, gay violence was comedic.

eventually, one night, it all came to light. at least, that she and i were sexually involved. that week was a blur. she was taken out of school. it was brushed under the rug. everyone trying to save face i guess and keep other kids from finding out, but somehow i always felt like they knew. they knew that she was taken out of school because of me. because we were gay

i tried to move on, but my studies never got better. i just grew more jaded. i never did any work. i mouthed off to the teachers, continued getting detentions and just plainly stopped caring. no one could get me to do anything. i would play hooky.

and that was just.... my life. perpetual anger at a system that failed me spectacularly. to this day i still hate that place. i cant be there. i was groped and molested and it was treated like nothing

so yeah

thanks for listening to my ted talks

#av talks #text #THIS IS HEAVY #rape mention #abuse mention

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