#tho i don't think i've seen lizzie do it rn.

[raindropren]

I've realized that everyone's second season and onwards, there is constant talk of "nothing carrying over" and you can tell everyone kinda thinks that everyone else should forget who they were last season.

y'know, other then them. everyone has sorta been very, "Don't hold a grudge against me for past seasons! it's a totally different season!" and then they turn around and talk about their grudge towards a different person because of a PAST SEASON.

i love it. everyones alittle hypocritical!

[the-blorb-system]

Ehe, kind of ironic actually because I consider "Alice" by PEGGY sort of my theme song.

It fit both of my source, and my childhood experiences as a chronic maladative daydreaming and delusion experiencer. I still do it, but I try to do it less because I quite literally shut down because I immerse myself in it too much. I leave it for others like Amy whose job is relieving stress through daydreams.

It come with a lot of pros, but too many cons.

.. not to mention the cool ability to see things vividly casted on the walls in front of me like it's an half transparent projection. It's kinda funny to think about it since I'm aphantasiac.

Also.. the song I currently obsess over is called Istanbul by they might be giants.

It fit so good to the dynamic of Introjects.

Especially Introjects who like,, source separate at least to a level that like they choose a separate name different from 'canon' which is what they go by.

Like 'Istanbul not constantinople' can stand for '[alter name] not [source name]'.

And the "why they'd change it? I can't say, people just like it better that way" can have so many meanings. 'People' can stand both for said alter, and the brain itself who percieved this separation and detachment necessary. And the 'I can't say' part also have a few meanings. It can be that you can't say because it is Forbidden, or because you don't know yourself so you can't say.

....I hate it

Don't get me started on Evelyn Evelyn..

- Digi

I haven't heard Evelyn Evelyn, but god Istanbul was one of my very favourite songs growing up, I kid you not

I've never thought about the lyrics in relation to system stuff before because even after I learned about mine I only had the song association is like. Fun Day With My Parents, the lyrics were just sounds that contributed to the music and not actually words with meaning.

You make a really good point of some of those lyrics tho... damn.

Most of my fictive headmates identify pretty heavily with their sources, but for them it's been less of an issue of needing to be seen separately from their sources (still a thing tho) and more an issue of "don't treat my source like a joke".

Le Grand's Indifferent has been a good way for some of them to cope with the concept of being a little different from their sources because their memories of the events suddenly became that much more real. Like, legit, Leo was dead, no heartbeat, for a few minutes, just for one example. Lots of them have scars, trauma, etc., but because most of those memories come from what I know of as cartoons, they're treated as sort of inconsequential, or just part of the story, by the cartoon. Which isn't bad necessarily, that's kind of the point of those shows, but, well. when that's your actual reality...

Actually it's making a lot of sense why we're so focused on Steven Universe, rn, a lot of the music is just sooo good for system themes.

-Lizzy

[we-are-inevitable]

(i think my asks are working now! yay! idk what happened with them tho jskdjskdj)

I hope I'm not overstepping here, but......I think its a common thing, feeling like an imposter in fandom. there are a lot of opinions and people and thoughts and chaos in any fandom, so I understand how you might feel isolated or like you're intruding (I know that I've definitely felt that way before, and tbh I still do in the newsies fandom for quite a few reasons that we don't need to go into rn.) I don't know if you're wanting advice or not, and if you aren't, feel free to ignore the advice im gonna give here. i like to think of myself as a friend, and I'm here whenever you need me, no matter what <3

if you ARE wanting advice though, here's mine: fandom is supposed to be an inclusive space. everyone is welcome to create, and share, and enjoy common interests, no matter what parts of the media they've seen or haven't seen. I've only seen 92sies once, a really long time ago, and I dont remember any of the characters that weren't in livesies, and hell I can't even remember the background newsies! its a miracle if I can remember the delancey brothers first names, and I only know the names of like. 3 or 4 newsies that aren't """main characters."""" I know that words probably don't help much, but just.....I want you to know that I wouldn't even be in the newsies fandom if it weren't for your writing and how welcoming and kind you are. its ok to feel the way you're feeling, but I just want you to know that you're not the only one who's feeling that way. fandom is a space for everyone, so you're not any less worthy of creating and sharing things than anyone else is <3

lizzie. lizzie lizzie lizzie. i answered your other asks before this one because this one made me cry

you have NO idea how much i needed to hear that. recently ive been so,, nervous about my content- for no good reason, really- so hearing this? this was a relief

idk it's just ,, hard to know where i stand in the fandom because basically the only people i write about are: jack, davey, katherine, sarah, crutchie, spot, race, albert, and medda. i'm not emotionally attached to anyone else, and i'm not going to write about them, because i don't know them. and honestly? i don't really think i need to.

one of the things that shocked me the most about joining this fandom is the intense attachment to background characters with little to no lines, bc i've never really seen that in a fandom space before? it kind of shocked me at first because i felt like i HAD to write for these characters or else i'd be like ,, kicked out of the fandom. i felt bad when i didn't write spromeo or blush. i felt bad when i didn't include jojo or finch in my fics. i felt bad when the only thing from 92sies that i included in my writing was Sarah Jacobs. i felt bad when i didn't give the delancey brothers a redemption arc (because honestly? i hate them so much and they don't really deserve one.)

i think i'm slowly coming to terms with the fact that no one really cares whether i do it or not, because at the end of the day it's *my* writing, but sometimes it can be overwhelming.

but, for real, thank you SO much for this. i love you sm and you're such a great person!! literally your asks are some of the best, and i love love LOVE interacting with you !! (side note: i still have your small town au ask about les and jack shenanigans !! im gonna get to it eventually bc omg i love it sm)

thank you for this !! and if you ever need anything, im here !!!