#this year sucked ass i hope '25 is better

[confessxcheese4tcc]

this has been one hell of a year one shooting after another bc there was literally almost one today but she got caught

CONFESSION #348

[writingwisterias]

Day 18: Thigh Riding

Damnation! Divorced! Leon Kennedy x AFAB! Reader Warnings: SMUT, MDNI, Drinking, Divorced Leon, Age-Gap, Thigh riding, Fingering, Cowgirl, Unprotected Sex, Creampie, Breast sucking, Beer belly, Depression, Leon's method of therapy is sex Masterlist This is my personal favourite of the whole 25 days! I hope you enjoy, thank you for all the love <3

Leon sighed as he looked at the collection of empty bottles on the coffee table, so many of the green beer bottles he could recreate that annoying song his kids liked to listen to. He ran his hands over his face, the stubble scratching his palms as his eyes glanced at the kitchen counters. The papers were bright white against the dark marble, a constant reminder of his blaring divorce. He knew he fucked up before she threw the ring at him, apparently sickness and health meant nothing to her. Only when he fell into this whirlpool of depression did she then decide to leave him, despite their vows to each other. Leon sighed at the picture of his kids that was hung in front of him. He couldn't even see them currently, not until he cleared up his act whenever that was going to happen. Leon thought she understood, thought she was a safe place to deal with his issues but he was wrong. She had enough of his endless drinking and slept with her stupid Co-worker.

Of course, the woman made herself out to be the victim, that the reason she destroyed the only stable thing in his life was because of his drinking. His nightmares that constantly disturbed the house were another one of the many complaints as she sat him down and paced around the room during her announcement of this decision. It's not like he could help half of these things, he genuinely thought she understood but now he supposed like all things they eventually leave him.

The music was loud as he took another sip of the beer in his hands glancing at the door and waiting for the soft knock he knew was coming. He shouldn't have called you - dragged you into the hell hole that he resigned himself to. You were too innocent and kind for that only being a few years older than when he was thrust into this life. It was unprofessional to even have this relationship with you; you were his trainee, a rookie and yet you were constantly his more recent contact. He shouldn't have been admiring the way your body felt against him as he would pull you back during fights keeping you behind him just in case. You worked so well with him, maybe that's why during the mess in China the touches got more personal, lingering in certain places.

He had to stifle a groan when he opened the door to you wearing a shirt tennis skirt and oversized jumper. Your legs were exposed to the cold, turning red as you shivered on the spot. "I'm gonna freeze my ass off if you don't let me in" you shivered jumping on the spot to keep your warmth. He chuckled lowly guiding you into his dark apartment. You probably should be more nervous doing this, shy away from him as he guides you inside but after everything the two of you have seen - he was comfortable, a warmth and guidance back to reality. Never pressing you to return to the real world faster than you could process what you have seen like your other partners.

"it's not my fault you decided to wear that outfit" he grumbled watching your ass cheeks poke out from underneath as he lifted the fabric of your skirt slightly. You giggled swatting his hand away as you turned to face him, now enveloped in the warmth of his apartment as he shut the door. You ignored the bottles that littered everywhere, ignored the sounds of Nickelback that filled the silence. You knew why he wanted to fuck you, why he called you over when it got too much, having accidentally announced his divorce during a drunken night at the bar. "I thought you liked it when I dress like this?" You teased as you approached him. Your body is pressing against his crotch feeling it twitch against his jeans. "I like it better when your skin doesn't freeze my hands when I touch you" he grumbled, pulling away and moving back towards the armchair he often sat in. You watched as he shifted his hips in the same motion as when he thrust himself up into you. You half expected him to tap his thigh drawing you closer but he didn't look your way. Like there was some ghost in the kitchen behind you. You turned to drop your bag off and then spotted the papers. That's why he called you.

"You alright?" You asked, your voice cautious. Of course, he wasn't okay, you knew that from the state of his home. His call was a reach. A reach to maybe someone that will make him forget her. Remind him of the person he used to be when he fell in love with her, in hopes one day she would take him back. He knew she never would, he ruined that bridge...burned it to the ground. He was sure once his kids turned 18 she would never talk to him again.

Leon shook his head at your question his eyes finally meeting yours as you approached him. His breath hitched as you sat on his lap getting yourself comfy against his warmth. It was wrong, the age gap made him feel sick. He would hate it if he found out his child was in a relationship like this in the future but you never seemed to care. You seemed to thrive in his affection and attention. To point your performance even improved at work. He felt slimy as his hand caressed your thigh the spot so close to the hem of your skirt. It wasn't the first time you were here like this and he knew it wouldn't be the last. There was some string tying you both together, tethering your souls. If he was spiritual he would have assumed you were his soulmate with how well you both clicked.

"Got the papers today, she said if I clean up my act I can see the kids. It's just hard. Drinking is the only way that makes me forget. The only thing that worked at least" he sighed. You understood where he came from that's why he was so open with you about it. When he bought you to meet his wife that's where it went downhill. She was convinced you were a home wrecker but neither of you had pushed that boundary until after his divorce was announced and he showed up at your door drunk shortly after to drag you to the bar. "What do you need?" You whispered, your head resting against his shoulder. You watched your fingers run along the back of his hand admiring the size difference. "I don't know love" he sighed, hitting his head on the back of the armchair. He felt you shift on his lap, leaving your back against his chest. Your ass pressed against his crotch as your hips swayed lightly to the music that filled the room. Leon stifled the groan, his eyes darkened as he watched you.

He started to nibble at the nape of your neck, his hand pushed your back further against him giving you an arch as you tried to stay pressed against his bulge. Leon felt himself getting lost in you, your perfume filling his senses, your hair tickling his cheeks. "What do you need Leon?" You whispered again, your tone dripping to a sultry one as you looked at him in the corner of your eye. His blond hair had fallen over his eyes, his hand still clutching the bottle. He glanced back at the kitchen, realizing the irony of the two of them acting like this given the papers. "You" he finally confirmed. His hand drifted up your thigh again sliding underneath your skirt.

He could feel the warmth coming from your pussy before his fingertips touched it. You could feel his smirk against your neck as he finally came in contact with the fabric of your undies. "So wet my love, already?" He teased. You whined as his hands ran up and down the fabric, your pussy sticking to the wetness of the gusset. A beg attempted to leave your lips as his finger slipped past the fabric gathering your arousal. "Don't tease today please" you whined, bucking your hips against his hand. His chuckle vibrated against your back, his voice dropping to the octave that made your toes curl "Why not? I thought you liked being teased". Leon's fingers found the top of your underwear, toying with the elastic. A silent way command for you to lift your hips for him.

He enjoyed seeing you so eager to follow his command, your underwear slid down your legs as you kicked them aside with his help. Leaving your weeping pussy to sit on his thigh. Every time he moved the rough fabric brushed along your core, Leon could already feel the wet patch form on his leg. His hands found their place on your hips and began to move them, smirking as he felt your breaths against his ear. Small whimpers and whines leave your lips as the pleasure begins to build up. Your clit throbbed desperate for a closer feel but at the angle he had pulled you back it barely got any of the action. “Leon-” You begged. He already knew what you were asking for, his hands had stopped you from angling the hips in the correct position. “Please..” You attempted again. His chuckle was low again as he began to kiss at the spot below your ear. You could feel his erection tent in his jeans, the sheer girth of it poking at your ass cheek. “I’ve been good” You tried yet again. This time his chest vibrated with a loud laugh, one that made your cheeks redden with blush. “Have you? Sauntering over here in that outfit- for every man to get a look at these” He mumbled as one hand moved to caress your thigh, the flesh spilling from his fingertips as he squeezed it slightly. “I dressed up for you” You whined. 

Leon tutted a smirk plastered on his face as he watched you form excuses in your brain just to get what you wanted. Hoping that he would fool for one. His hand moved up underneath your skirt, his fingertips brushing your clit as you circled your hips. His other hand moved up your body underneath the jumper, teasing your erect nipples pinching and tweaking the buds eliciting such pretty noises. He could hear your breaths shorten as you drew closer to your finish. Your eyes shut tight, breathing hitching as your body prepared to let the pleasure snap and flow through you. Only his hands landed back on your hips, the grip tight enough to stop your movements. “No…No please Leon..” You whimpered, your skin already covered in a light sheen of sweat with the amount of layers you had. Leon only chuckled again, looking at your flushed cheeks, your eyebrows pinched in frustration. “Come on, strip. Let me see you then” He whispered, his shoulder jolting your body ordering you to stand up. 

He watched as you shimmed the skirt off, not missing the subtle movement of rubbing your thighs together to keep the stimulation going. Your jumper was next, exposing your bare chest. “No bra?” He spoke as his eyes gazed over your body admiring everything you had to offer. He loved how young and perky your breasts were, always capturing them in his mouth as they bounced with his thrusts. Your thighs are always around him in such perfect ways, the skin so soft in comparison to his. And then there was your pretty cunt, the shaved skin feeling so soft against his tip as he would run it along your folds, so neatly present just for him. 

You watched as he undid his belt, shimming the jeans off as he let his erection spring free. His shirt was next, thrown and discarded somewhere in the room. He had gone soft in recent years, his abs now neatly tucked away behind a soft layer of fat. It made him self-conscious at first, his ex always poking fun at his ‘dad bod’. Then he found you, your hands gripping to his softer flesh, your teeth skinning into it softly as you needed you quieten your noises. Another reason for his growing love for you. He watched as you straddled his lap, your breasts hanging in his face as you lined yourself up. The armchair creaked with your movements as you began to circle your hips allowing you both to become lubed up with your arousal. He felt you begin to bounce, the movements slow at first as you pull yourself to the tip before slamming back down. The music became blurred in the background, he could only make out a few distant words. This felt so easy with you, the pleasure building up quickly as your walls clenched around him. This moment further confuses him with his ex-wife, and his insecurities of himself creeping in. Your hand redirected his face, guiding his view back to the present as you continued to ride him. Your teeth nibbled against his neck, hand entwined with his hair. Leon captured a nipple, sucking on it as he looked up at you, his eyes scanning the blissed-out look you had. “Don’t let her ruin you further Leon…You are perfect” You whimpered. The words shocked him, causing him to briefly stop sucking. Your hand rubbed the back of his head, pushing him gently to continue. “You never changed, she did” 

His cock twitched inside you, his drunken mind becoming fuzzier with your appraisal. Your presence a reminder to him that he never changed, he was still the same person he always wanted to be. His hips drove up into you. Your hands left his head to hold his shoulders as he began his assault on your cervix. His cock driving so deep inside you as he poured everything he could to make you feel good. Your clit throbbed as the whisps on his snail trail rubbed against it thanks to the small belly he had created. You moaned loudly, head falling back exposing your neck. Leon smiled against your breast, biting down on the nipple as you finally orgasmed around him. The papers and situation became forgotten as he felt himself spill inside of you, your greedy pussy taking everything he gave you as he continued to thrust it up. You smiled down at him as he let go of your breast, bringing his lips in for a kiss. He held you close, his softening cock still inside of you. Love was an unspoken word between the two of you, the actions and bond you shared proved how you felt enough. You savoured his warmth as he held you close on the armchair, enjoying the closeness. “Thank you” He whispered, burying his face in your neck. His head was now clear of the thoughts that previously clouded them. 

“Anytime” 

Taglist: Taglist: @kasueli @luvrgreyy @michellekmsh @miss0giarra @cinnabunnysavvy @redollface @my-loved-figure-skates @luvlouiee @drawboo22 @moth-quasar @nyxxoxo @crazy-b1tch

[blerb-f1]

This one goes out to @leclerking and their lovely anon! I saw that ask and suddenly felt compelled to write my first FF in like 10 years. Hope it ain't too bad because golly gee i haven't written since it was actually 2011. I also don't know how to do this Tumblr thing so i hope it works lol. Also, i kinda ignored parts of the prompt but not like purposely but i really can't do that because that isn't my personality and your girl is struggling. Anyway, enough rambling. I hope this is fine still.

RBR!Sebastian Vettel x Ferrari!Fem!Reader

Y/N stood in front of the hotel rooms mirror, desperately trying to force her hair into some kind of suitable hairstyle. Something that wouldn't make her look like an absolute buffoon. Something that would convince her team that she was a viable member coming into the future.

Currently, life sucked. Ferrari was rethinking her staff contract quoting "Cost Cutting Measures". Cost Cutting her ass, more like saving money for the execs to waste on vacations or something. Additionally, her mother had started jumping on the whole "Married by 22, kids by 25 train" and started calling her a withering vegetable that no one would like. Telling yourself that you, you're a cool rock and nothing hurts you is one thing, but having your mother repeat mean thoughts iis different. That shit sticks. Couldn't a Gal enjoy her life for a moment before settling down?

Y/N finally gave up, resorting to her hair just staying loose with some spray on glitter on top. That stuff would stick everywhere but nothing would be able to worsen this day by now. Her dress already almost entirely covered in glitter, she felt like it almost was a wall against all the outside forces, which were ready to fight her. Especially that walking, lovable, hateable nuisance called Sebastian Vettel with his cursed curly hair.

One last breath. Air in, air out. 'You got this', she muttered while checking her appearance one last time.

-------------------------

As it turned out, she didn't got this. Seeing her Ferrari Coworkers all happily dancing, enjoying her life, while her great F1 Dreams were sitting on a knife's edge drove her mad. Sebastian had sent her a wink along with a cheeky expression coming from the Red Bull table. Normally she'd be ready to throw hands at him. Maybe steal a touch then and there. But not today. She was about to follow her dream of working for her Idols Team.

She sat in the darker part of the stage, eyes still focused on Sebastian as she saw movement at the Mercedes Table. Michael Schumacher had gotten up and walked towards Sebastian. Seeing those two together always irked her weirdly. Schumacher was her Idol, Sebastian was the rude thought that woke her up at night.

________________________

"ANOTHER WIN FOR VETTEL!" the announcer screamed loudly, his voice penetrating Y/Ns Ears badly. She pressed her hands on top of her ears as she saw her favourite Nuisance approaching, not that she'd ever let him know. His smug grin practically made her blood boil.

He stared into her eyes, savouring the defeating expression she showed.

"Well, Schatz, what do you say now, huh? Need me to show your Team how to drive a car?"

She sighed. He always called her Schatz which grated her nerves badly.

"Oh Honey, don't need you to do that. But you'd better go ahead and give your car the stroking she deserves. Kinky Kylie has the only ass you'll ever get close to and she deserves it after carrying you to victory"

Y/N crossed her arms, giving him a disapproving expression. Sebastian's Eyes widened for a short second before returning to his usual smug grin. "At least Kylie runs well. Never seen a Shitbox like yours." He turned around to leave before facing her one last time : "You know, your ass could be the next one if you'd like?"

Y/N scoffed. "In your dreams, Vettel."

—------------

Michael seemed to talk to him about something. Important Driver things propably. Weirdly though, he kept glancing in her direction as if telling Sebastian something related to her? Did he hear about her getting axed? Telling him that this Nuisance would be gone? 'No, unlikely 'Y/N thought.' Michael Schumacher wouldn't do something like that. Not to a staff member.' Nonetheless, her thoughts kept spiraling and tears started threatening to spill out of her eyes.

She quickly collected her purse and rushed to a side hallway, sinking down on the cold ground as large shimmering droplets started spilling down her face.

Life sucked. What was she supposed to do? She left school and started working for Ferrari. She didn't have any other plans, this goddam Team was her Dream!

The woman leaned against the wall, the cold surging through her thin dress as a cold stream of air hit her shoulders. She opened her teary eyes and glanced in the direction of the cold stream. Of course, he had to appear. Sebastian Vettel in the Flesh. He quickly stepped towards her with an almost concerned expression on his face. Concerned? He? For her? Y/N tried to bite on her lip to stop the tears from spilling but-

"Don't". His voice being so much much gentler than usual. "That only hurts but doesn't stop the tears"

She scoffed. "Why do you care?"

Sebastian slid onto the ground next to her. "Because I can't stand seeing a pretty girl like you crying. Who made you cry like that?" he asked before turning towards her. His face returned into his usual cheeky grin. "Or are you crying because you can't have me?"

"Shut up Vettel" she managed to mutter in between sniffles before grabbing a tissue to wipe her tears.

Sebastian relaxed against the wall, staring at Y/N. "Tell me what's going on. Crying won't do shit, you know. Gotta tackle those issues before they blow up more than they already do."

She just stared at him again. "Why" punctuating each word. "Do you care?"

"MaybeIDontWantToSeeYouCry" he quickly answered.

"Weren't you happy to see me cry after a race?"

"That's different. So, What's up? Talk or I'm telling Michael to solve this." He gestured widly.

Y/N blew her nose before finally giving up. No chance of winning today. She stumbled over her words for a second before finally speaking.

"Ferrari wants to axe me. And mom threatens to disown me if I don't get married soon."

"Oh"

Of course. He wouldn't give her a real answer. This stupid-

"Oh Schatz." Sebastian spoke. "That's a tough situation you got there. I don't know why Ferrari would want to let you go but honestly, their strategies are sometimes stupid as fuck so I'm not surprised. And you, getting disowned, because you aren't married yet?"

Y/N stared at him wide-eyed. ".. Yeah"

Thoughts seemed to rattle in his brain as he noticed Y/N starting to shiver in the cold room. Slipping out of his jacket before draping it over her shoulder which gained him a bewildered expression.

"That's more like the Y/N I like, you know. No tears."

".. You like me?"

"I uhh" he blushed. "I never said that! But I can't have you gone from F1, that won't be the same without you. I could talk to Christian. If you'd be fine with Red Bull of course?"

Y/N still was bewildered. He…actually liked her? Enough to talk Christian Horner into letting her join? She felt her stomach churn at the thought of leaving the Ferrari and joining Red Bull of all Places. But somehow the idea of staying with him sounded nice. Very nice.

"You mean it?" she asked, pulling the jacket tighter.

"I do." Sebastians Expression was very serious. She'd never seen him like that before. Not smug or teasing but honest. This was enough to convince her to give in. She let herself sink onto his shoulder, hands falling into these damned soft looking curles as her face laid against his neck. He only felt his neck heat up more before letting his hands rest on her waist.

"Does that mean Yes?" he asked, almost shyly.

She learned forward and pressed a Kiss against his Lips, Hands locking into his hair. "Is that enough of an answer?" His brain was long gone, melted. Flirting was great. He was great at it but Y/N made his Thoughts go wild. Kind words turned into teasing mean remarks but that somehow worked out well didn't it? As his own hands slid through her glittery hair, Y/N asked a Question:" What were you and Michael talking about there?"

The difficult one. Mean question.

"He noticed you looking down and asked me to check on you, quoting you'd be embarrassed by someone older doing it or something"

She hummed against his chest, reveling in the warmth that his body provided. "I guess the Marriage Issue is also solved."

—-------

After almost one long hour Sebastian and Y/N emerged from the corridor, looking noticeably more disheveled / covered in glitter than before while stealthily trying to return to their seats. Corinna, who said next to her Husband, sent him a warm smile." See? I was right about them. You know, Was sich liebt, das neckt sich."

—---------

TL:

'Was dich liebt, das neckt sich.' German proverb meaning people who love another tease another

[alymccart]

Hello! Could you possibly give a humble peasant like me some anatomy advice? The way you draw bodies and hands is just *chef's kiss* ;w;

I wish I had an easy answer for this... but for me what helped a ton was drawing A LOT. I've been working on this skill seriously for probably 25 years at this point. I am my own worst critic and know I have so much I can improve upon. VERY IMPORTANT, drawing from life (or photographs/video stills/screenshots/etc, *not tracing, photography distorts shapes*) has got to be my number 1 suggestion for how to get better with anatomy and drawing in general. Since it's hard to get out and do that a lot, my back up is photos. I particularly like finding photos and videos of athletes mid-motion because they are far more dynamic than staged photography). The studio classes I attended in college where we spent 6 hours just drawing models over and over again were a slog to get through, but the skills honed in them were invaluable.

I've gotten to the point where I can sorta fake it and come up with anatomy from my head, but I always try to find some kind of reference to back up my mental creation. REFERENCE is KEY. It is so so so important. There is no shame in using it, and I don't see the point in making a huge deal about *not* using it. That was a pervasive thing floating around back when I was active on deviantART a long time ago and it was not good.

Another thing to consider paying close attention to with regards to reference is drawing what you see, not what you THINK you see. Brains form biases that will interfere with what you're trying to draw. I've flipped references upside down to force my brain to recalculate as I go for this reason.

Any step, no matter how tiny, is a step toward improvement. Even just going out to a park or something and sketching whatever crosses your path is great. Or you could do the same thing on the computer while you watch videos or look at photos. Animals, people, trees, plants, whatever. It'll all help you improve. And don't worry about accuracy at first! Just draw whatever gestures come to mind. Like 99% of it will look like scribbly garbage (it did for me and a lot of my peers) but it does help. Hands, in particular, are really hard. Very early on in my artistic path I realized this and kind of became obsessive about drawing them properly, so I drew a *lot* of hands. Whole sketch pages of just hands. The great thing about hands is that you've got your own! You can just draw the hand in front of you, or take a picture of the gesture you need and use that as reference. Many places will have studios open to the public where you can do model/life drawings (some nude, so if that's a concern, be sure to check first). Some will be free, or you'll have to pay some kind of fee (they need to pay the models). One free online resource that's good is Posemaniacs.com. I highly recommend the 30 second drawing tool, wherein you only have 30 seconds to sketch out the reference before it cycles to a new, random one. The extreme time limit forces your brain into overdrive and it is shocking how quickly you can improve as a result. We did this in school, as well, with live models. They'd just switch up poses every time a timer rang. I could probably go on for hours about this, there's a lot of jumbled thoughts coming to mind, but I think this is a good starting point. Persevere, don't seek perfection, and treat yourself kindly because this is a skill that requires a lot (mentally and physically) to hone and it isn't easy. Every artist has their ups and downs, but I think it's worth the struggle to be able to create. I really hope this helps! Thanks for the ask! A little bonus snippet: Back in high school I was *terrified* of drawing people because I sucked ass at it. I was garbage. Absolutely refused to do it. I drew animals and dragons and gryphons and stuff and when I started angling toward my career I had assumed I would continue in that direction. Nope! Now I'm drawing pretty much nothing but people/humanoids and I love it.

[marley-manson]

The whole Twilight of the Gods arc straight up sucks all kinds of ass, but I'm still in a very positive mood re this show so I'm gonna talk about the things I did like:

-- I don't actually dislike a lot of the Xena/Ares stuff? Ares is an enormous dick but he's the antagonistic entitled god of war so it's not exactly unexpected, and I find the way it leads up to him making a genuinely selfless sacrifice ultimately satisfying even if the emotional continuity could've been handled better. Plus I'm a fan of Xena throwing him around and playing with his tits when she's pretending to seduce him ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

-- And I'm also a fan of Ares impaling himself on Xena's sword while getting all seductive in their first reunion in 25 years.

-- Also I'm glad they made it very clear that Ares didn't know Livia was Xena's daughter lol.

-- I like Athena as the main antagonist, like that Athena has a mortal girlfriend, like Xena killing her. There's a lot of fic where Athena and Artemis show up and are treated as good and wise and deserving of respect and even worship, especially in contrast to evil Ares, and I've never really liked that sisterhood solidarity by default vibe lol so I like them as antagonists in canon. The final battle between Xena and Athena ft Artemis was also satisfying - the way Xena wins fair and square, and it only doesn't take the first time because Eve died first.

-- And as much as the whole plot is dumb, I like that Xena takes on like five gods at once and kills them all. When she gets Hades with the fire blowing technique 🥰

-- Oh also I love to see Gabrielle holding her own against some gods like Hades and Hephaeston. Not the war gods, but the gods whose thing isn't really combat? It makes sense to me (not having seen Hercules so having little reference point for the gods' power levels and also not really caring anyway), and it's awesome to see.

-- "Sounds like you and Xena had some great adventures together dad." Genuinely heartwarming as fuck.

-- Livia was irritating and the way she acted like a 16 year old when she was supposed to be 25 was obnoxious, BUT Adrienne Wilkinson was successfully channeling Hudson Leick imo and it was fun to hear Callisto's cadence from her.

-- Love Hope making an appearance while the Furies are driving Gab insane (even if that IS outside their jurisdiction lol) and drawing the obvious parallel between Eve and Hope. I like to think it's Gabrielle's very buried resentment being voiced, and frankly I support Gabby's right to murder Eve <3

-- Also on that note, I love Gab being the one to conclude that Livia is beyond saving and needs to die. I like to imagine she did feel a little thrill of satisfaction in turning the tables on Xena there, somewhere deep deep down, and maybe that lingering resentment over Hope is partly why she can write off Livia.

-- While Xena did wimp out when it came to killing her daughter and that sux, I give props for the moment when she says she could do it if she had to, and for the fact that the blocking of the fight leaves it ambiguous as to whether she would have pulled herself together and done it if Livia hadn't taken advantage of her hesitation. Like, at least she didn't drop the chakram and go "i can't," or something.

-- The show's attempt to ground Livia/Eve's magical personality change in memories of Xena taking care of her as a baby didn't work, but they clearly did make an effort to have some emotional continuity and I respect it.

-- Aphrodite helping Xena and Gabrielle because Gabrielle is her friend was very sweet and it's nice to see her get a dramatic scene.

-- It feels arbitrary and annoying that Xena doesn't just kill Ares - even if Xena does have feelings towards him to some extent lol that wouldn't stop her - but it is a fun moment when Ares is like "you can't bring yourself to shoot me," and she immediately shoots him. And I'm free to headcanon that Xena was not so much sparing Ares, as she was so pissed off at Ares in particular for enabling Eve's mortal wound that she deliberately chained him up just to make him watch her kill his family before she kills him.

-- Dying Eve telling Xena she liked spiders as a kid, and the scene at the end where she's playing with a spider on the beach was also genuinely sweet.

-- "Looks like you got your daughter back." "No, we got our daughter back." Of course I remembered this exchange distinctly, but I hadn't remembered that it was the very last line of the season. Excellent note to go out on.

[the-bjd-community-confess]

k I don’t really care MUCH about cvlur’s past actions in the hobby with her preorder & shit, cuz I wasn't directly affected. it was one of those things where everyone was talking bout it but i didn't order/want a doll so it wasn’t personal to me. It sucked/etc/hope the victims got compensated/etc. That's a disclaimer cuz I'm neither a cvlur fan or hater. This ain’t about her directly. It’s about her fans/haters who like to debate this constantly lately. Which I seem to fuckin be surrounded by. Also, my tone is kinda aggro to some people cuz I curse but i don’t actually lose sleep over this shit lmfao.

what DOES annoy me anytime someone brings this up like that last confession crying about how ppl are so mad she fucked up when she was “young” - girl is ALMOST 30 NOW if I understand correctly. If it happened 10 yrs ago she wouldnt have been in her early 20s, she’d been like 16-19 and THAT would be WAY more understandable to say “she was young and didn’t know any better.” this shit happened LESS than 10 yrs, she was like, college age, which for US is 18-22 TYPICALLY if you go to college fresh outta highschool for a 4 year degree. ppl in their early 20s, while yeah, in the grand scheme of LIFE are young, are still ADULTS, capable of running complex fuckin tasks from working at a company to managing money for a group order. ppl in their early 20s include 20-24. stop infantilizing people. People can make mistakes at ANY age and severely misjudge a situation (intentional or not what she did). cvlur and I are roughly the same iirc, at the time of sending this im 28, turning 29. If she’s younger than me, she was running an order as a highschooler, which she wasn’t.

There were SO fucking many ppl in college in their “early 20s” who, mature or not, worked with large sums of money, complex organizational structures, etc. some ppl are suited for that shit, some ain’t. You can straight up just say “she was under prepared for the situation” instead of “oh poor bby she was so young 🥺 she just didn’t know!!!” you sound like a fuckin moron, anon. Do you treat every 20yr old who makes a simple mistake at the grocery store like that too? You better tip ur waiters extra who are under 25 even if they spill your drink or make you wait bc they were just too young to know better, they can’t be blamed for that

and for the other person in the comments too, “adults obsessing over her” or whatever …… she’s an adult she’s an adult she’s an adult no wonder why she avoids talking to ppl both haters and fans alike take away her fucking agency SO much. OFF THE SUBJECT OF CVLUR but relating to scammers rn tho, the same can STILL be said about it. Their age doesn’t = not knowing enough about running a good thing. Look at ppl complaining abt dxg1rly, is she worse than everyone younger bc she’s said she’s almost 40, so she only went in with bad intents and not a mistake like cvlur? same with bvmf?

Not sayin dx or bvmf or anyone else who’s been late on shipping/etc etc is absolved of anything, or that they’ve done smth, and same with cvlur, cuz i’ve never ordered from any of these ppl. but don’t give ppl the weak ass get outta jail “oh i was 21 I was just too young to know!”to keep using esp if they really did do something bad. Also, anon, late shipping is absolutely scam territory, and if it happened to you I bet you'd cry scam too by year 2 or whatever lmfaooooo. Thanks for coming to my “I don’t like that the community infantilizes so much shit about this hobby for grown adults” ted talk, I’m off to go scam someone or smth cuz i’m in my 20s so I’m young and don’t know any better lmfao

~Anonymous

[mycptsdstory]

IM ENGAGED!! 🤩🤩

I got engaged on my birthday, 21st of may. I didn't say anything because I was still in America and my cats were being taken care of by a professional cat sitter. I didn't want my flat to be broken in too. So I waited till I got home lol

I'm gonna be a mom for a minute.

I know it sounds soooo cliché of "tHiNgs WiLl gEt bEtTeR. jUsT hAvE hOpE" bs.

Because let me tell you, you have to fucking heal, at least a little bit before you get anyone in your life. You want to get serious and settle down, then fucking heal. Healing SUCKS, healing fucking hurts. No one says this crap.

I was that girl who thought I didn't deserve love because of my trauma. I was that girl who was harming mysekf, putting myself in dangerous situations, who had depression, who had panic attacks. I hated myself that much, I thought I wouldn't live past 25 years old. Now I'm 31. You're gonna have suck up that pride and ask for help. You're gonna have to reach out. You want to heal, then you have to and I mean YOU HAVE TO put in the work. No one can heal for you. You want to heal, then go and do it.

And yes, you will fall flat on your face. You will fail and it will fucking suck. Healing is all about trial and error. Healing takes practice and fucking god damn work. No healing is the same, what works for someone else, might not work for you. And do you know what, that's okay. Why? We are not the same. No one is you and you are not them. And that's okay.

I had to learn this the hard way and yeahh, it fucking sucked.

After sucking up my pride up my ass, I asked for help. I wanted to heal because I got fed up of doing toxic traits. I didn't want to be that toxic person anymore. I WANTED TO HEAL, FOR ME, NO ONE ELSE.

I knew then, my trauma doesn't define me. My trauma wasn't me, my trauma wasn't my hobbies, my interests, my personality. The trauma is what happened to me and I refused to let the trauma take over me.

I want kids, I want a life with a good job that I love. I can't have that in England. So I'm planning to move to America where I feel safe.

My family is bat shit insane, who refuse to leave me the fuck alone. Even tho I left 8 years ago. So I'm moving country.

I finally found a person who loves me for me and that's all I ever wanted.

Remember, you do deserve love and you do deserve peace. Give yourself more credit.

[pixies-and-poets]

Once again, I'm benting because I'm so fuckign stressed. Tumblr, and the internet as we know it could come crashing down so soon. Look up 'Google vs Gonzalez'. I'm going to cry. It's all going to be over...

Hey there! Sorry for the late answer, been a busy workday. I hope you're feeling better right now.

Honestly I am surprised I haven't heard of this, considering that yes, this has potential to reshape the internet, paticularly the way social media/search engines work, as they're all driven by algorithms.

(for those who don't know what we're talking about, I don't really have time right now to try and explain what I've learned from my research, but here's good coverage if you're up for it: https://www.vox.com/policy-and-politics/2023/2/16/23582848/supreme-court-internet-section-230-terrorism-cases-gonzalez-google-twitter-taamneh )

Note what I said above: reshape, not destroy. The internet was able to evolve in a certain way because of the way laws were shaped early on, and if things change, then websites - and the humans who run and use them - would have to find other ways to communicate and share our works. And we would.

What I want you to consider to help you calm down, is that 1) the Supreme Court interprets laws as they are written, but does not make laws in itself. Our current Supreme Court sucks ass but they can always be overturned by actual new laws being passed. It looks to me like many questions about the legality of big tech, online algorithms, and the promotion of content are going to come to a head here, and if it didn't happen in this case it was probably due to happen sooner or later in US lawmaking, either in the Supreme Court or in Congress. They are considering a law that's 25 years old and was written when the internet was a much different place and worked very differently, and it's honestly kind of astounding it's held for so long with little relitigation. If society widely takes issue with the SC's interpretation of the law, new laws can be drafted.

2) As I mentioned above, if there's one thing humans are good at, it's adapting and overcoming. Having gotten used to the ability to communicate and make friends and share works with people all over the world, people wouldn't just roll over and give that up. If laws (or the interpretation of them) changed radically, things may end up looking different but we will still find ways to stay in touch with our friends and make new ones. To quote the girlie in my avatar, "we will rise above!"

3) There's a significant, I would even say most likely, chance that nothing changes at all, as the Supreme Court upholds the status quo.

4) Even if the "worst case scenario" happens- I have to admit the plaintiffs have a point, and that algorithmically-served content CAN cause people to fall down rabbit holes of bigotry and extremism... it's definitely a big problem. So a case like this may be what is needed to shake up the internet, and evolve it toward a healthier place (in tandem with what I discussed in point 2).

5) I'm not sure but I think this would only affect companies operating in the US? Which is most big tech companies, but ones in other countries can take over perhaps? I know certain other countries have their own downsides like more stringent libel laws, but there's gotta be some ideal place to host services.

I'm no legal scholar but I hope this helps you feel a little bit better! Mostly we'll have to just wait and see what happens, but again: we'll be here for each other, we'll figure it out together, and we will rise above!

[missywritesfor7]

🌙Moon’s Light | JJK🌙

Synopsis: Luna is a young paralegal trying to maintain her new found independence and enjoy life. Too bad her job sucks and her boss is the worst. As if that wasn’t bad enough, she encounters a vampire named Jungkook who changes her life in more ways than one.

Jungkook is a shield and protector of the vampire kingdom of Korealis. He’s trained his entire life to block out any and all distractions and focus solely on becoming the strongest. While investigating a potential threat to the kingdom, he encounters Luna who turns out to be more than he could have ever imagined. It becomes his job to protect her, but he can’t tell if what he’s feeling is his devotion to the job or perhaps something deeper.

Secrets are uncovered. Lives are on the line. Hearts are tested.

Pairing: Vampire!Jungkook x Fem!OC

Warnings: Violence, character death, eventual smut, tragedy, some angst, strong language, MINORS DNI

Previous chapter | Next chapter | Masterlist

|| Ch. 25: Believe ||

Going through her box of memories has brought a lot of forgotten parts of her past back to Luna’s mind. Times that she wishes she hadn’t unleashed. Just before Jungkook scared her half to death, she spent the better part of the hour fighting with those locked up feelings. She finally calmed down before he showed up and got her worked up again.

While rummaging through her seemingly never ending box of memories, she found an old purse she used to love. It was small and could barely hold more than a few cards and small change, but it was still her favorite accessory. It was nothing special by any means, just small and black with a long thin strap for her to wear it across her shoulders. She wore that purse through most of high school and half of college.

What she doesn’t seem to realize was there was a small note left inside that she doesn’t remember ever seeing before. It was folded up and stuffed in the purse as if it had been there for decades. It was from her ex. The one she nearly gave up her whole life for. The one who used her, lied to her, cheated on her, and gave her every reason to lose trust in every person she’d ever come across.

In the note her ex went on telling her about his many affairs during their relationship. He told her all of the lies he fed her that she never questioned. He told her about stealing money from her purse a few times. He even told her about the time he claimed to have been robbed right before her birthday which is why he didn’t get her a gift that year, when really he had spent the money on other women.

He wasn’t confessing in his note, no, he was bragging. He took pride in the fact that Luna trusted him and taunted her about it in this note. He called her a fool, then went on to call her a crazy bitch with her “weird ass evil eye” and had the nerve to say the affairs were her fault for being “crazy” and stupid.

Luna doesn’t know when he left her that note, but it was clear he must have put it there hoping she’d find it after he left her. Those old wounds she thought had healed were violently ripped back open when she read that note, and if Jungkook wasn’t sitting next to her right now looking sad and concerned with that large scratch across his face, she may have fully unleashed her anger on him. Especially after the way he scared her.

But the timing is still. Wrong.

“Are you asking me to be your girlfriend?” Luna asks slowly. “You want me to be your girlfriend?”

“My girlfriend,” Jungkook chuckles as if the concept is foreign to him. “Do you think I’d be here saying all of this if I didn’t want you to be my girlfriend?”

“No I guess not,” she says studying his demeanor. “But why? Why me? Is it because we’ve been spending so much time together that you find me convenient?”

“Convenient?” He scoffs offended. “You’ve been the most inconvenient pain in the ass since I’ve met you. There’s nothing convenient about you at all. I’ve lost many hours of sleep, taken beatings like I’ve never taken before all in the name of making sure nothing happens to you. I’ve pissed my dad off more since you’ve been around than I have my entire life. So believe me when I say this, LuLu, falling for you the way I have is far from convenient.”

Luna stares at him in shock by his words. It’s not that she doesn’t believe him. She’s seen enough of his memories to know that these words aren’t easy for him to say. However she doesn’t believe anything else. She doesn’t believe that history won’t repeat itself. She doesn’t believe that she can give herself to someone the way she had before. She doesn’t believe she can give Jungkook what he may really be looking for, what he needs. Whatever ‘what he needs’ means, she doesn’t believe that she’s it.

“Do I want you to be my boyfriend?” Luna whispers to herself, though Jungkook can still hear her.

“Well…yes,” Jungkook says with a hint of sarcasm. “If you word it that way, yes I suppose that’s exactly the same question I was asking.”

Luna takes a deep breath then sighs. “Tell me you’re serious. Tell me you won’t break me or use me. Tell me I won’t have anything to worry about. Tell me you won’t waste my time or lie to me.”

Jungkook looks her over, paying close attention to the fear in her eyes. He wishes he knew why she’s like this. He wishes he knew who hurt her to make her have little trust in anyone else.

He lightly strokes her cheekbone then lifts her chin to bring her eyes back to his. She’s beautiful to him and he can’t imagine how or why anyone would hurt her. He knows he’d do any and everything in his power to make sure she never feels pain again.

“I won’t tell you that,” he says brushing his thumb along her bottom lip. “I’ll show you.”

He brings his lips to hers sealing his words with a soft kiss. She gives him a faint smile and goes in for another kiss, this time a bit stronger. The butterflies filling both of their stomachs escape through every breath which gets increasingly stronger. Their tongues tangle together giving Jungkook flashbacks of the first time they kissed. And the second time. And of course the time he finally felt the feeling of being inside of her. The flashbacks not only spur him to press his body harder into hers, but it does the same to her because she could see every single moment that just flashed through his head. Every moment that made her knees weak flashed through her mind erupting with great intensity through her body causing her to push harder into his chest until he’s flat on his back. His hands slide to her waist gripping her belt loops as if he’s about to saddle up on a horse.

“WHOS IN THERE?!!” Shouts a voice from the front door that scares Jungkook and Luna sober from their intoxicating moment of intimacy.

Jungkook quickly jumps to his feet and quietly instructs Luna to stay hidden in the closet. He quietly steps out and looks through the peephole of the door. Two men are standing at the door waiting for someone to respond to their knocks and shouts. They knock again shouting for whoever is inside to answer the door.

“I knew it was nothing,” one of the guys says. “She hasn’t been back here. Definitely either dead or in another country by now.”

“The neighbors swore they heard someone yell,” the other guy says.

“They’re probably going crazy from all of the rumors that the place is haunted.”

“Yeah maybe. Let’s go.”

The two walk off and Jungkook waits until he’s able to hear them get far enough down the hall. He rushes back to Luna in the closet and grabs her hand.

“We have to get out of here,” he says urgently.

“Who was it?” Luna asks quickly throwing things into her backpack.

“I don’t know, but you’re not safe here.”

“I still have to go to my parents house,” Luna pleads. “I can’t leave until I do.”

“LuLu-“

“Jungkookie,” she interrupts paralyzing him. “I can’t leave until I get everything I need. I don’t know when I’ll be back so I have to do this now.”

“LuLu,” he sighs defeated. He absolutely doesn’t want her staying here any longer, but he knows he can’t fight her. “If anything happens-“

“I know,” she says having gotten used to his rules. “Just let me go through the house and that’ll be it.”

“Ok,” he resolves. “Get your backpack and I’ll carry you on my back. I’ll make sure we get there fast and unseen.”

“Don’t drop me,” she says nudging him to turn around.

“Never,” he says. “As long as you don’t let go.”

“Never,” she smiles jumping onto his back.

He grabs her legs and locks them at the ankles around his waist. His hands grip her thighs tightly then he makes his way to the door. When he’s sure no one is outside, he quickly walks out and rushes to the roof.

“Why are you taking the roofs?” She asks. “We’re not in Korealis.”

“What part of fast and unseen did you not understand?” He sasses speeding across the roofs of houses and buildings towards her parent’s house.

“I don’t think it takes all of this though,” she chuckles.

“Oh look, we’re here,” he says landing in front of the house. “What were you saying about a less efficient way to get here?”

“Shut up and come on,” Luna says jumping off of his back.

“Yes ma’am,” he chuckles.

Luna slowly opens the front door with Jungkook at the ready behind her. The place is still a mess, but the blood and other more traumatic things have been cleaned or removed. Luna knows she can’t take her time so she begins going through things in the living room. That’s the biggest place she hasn’t combed through yet.

The books on the shelf come up with nothing. The dusty movies sitting under the tv come up with nothing. Even hidden behind the picture frames on the wall is nothing. Luna starts to get discouraged thinking what she’s already found is it, and if that’s the case, it’s not nearly enough information.

Defeated, Luna treks into the kitchen hoping to at least grab her favorite childhood mug to take back with her. There’s nothing special about it, but it was a glittery silver and she loved it. She never wanted to drink out of anything else, even after she was an adult living on her own. As she’s retrieving the mug, she sees her mom’s recipe book sitting in the cabinet. Her mom cooked a little, but not quite enough to make sense of the amount of recipes stuffed in there. But then Luna takes a closer look. What starts as a few recipes for various dishes turns to newspaper clippings and handwritten notes.

Luna sifts through the book finding notes about her birth mother Luna, and notes about Hyungwon. It becomes clear that her mom was doing everything she could to try finding the person responsible for her birth parents’ death. There’s newspaper articles mentioning one of the best talent agencies in the city, the one headed by Park Hyungwon. There were other articles mentioning various disappearances in the area. All suspicious, and apparently all her mom thought were linked to Hyungwon.

“She knew where he was,” Luna whispers to herself as she flips through the articles. “She knew this whole time.”

“She never said anything?” Jungkook asks looking at everything from over her shoulder.

“No. At least not that I can think of. This is fucking crazy.”

They don’t have the time to sift through the entire thing so Luna stuffs it in her backpack to go through later. From the kitchen she moves to her parent’s room. She quickly goes through every corner of the room picking up photos and salvaging some of her mom’s most precious jewelry. In one of the drawers in her mom’s dresser Luna finds a journal. She wasn’t aware that her mom even kept a journal. She flips the book open and the words on the first page she comes to brings her pause.

The medicine seems to be working. There hasn’t been another incident. Kai is a genius, though I’m certain he may be a vampire too. There’s no other explanation for why he knows so much. Luna thinks they’re vitamins and she hasn’t questioned it. I’m still not strong enough to tell her. I’m afraid she’ll be upset. I’m afraid she’ll hurt one of us again. Her emotions are strong and out of control and she doesn’t even realize she’s doing it. Each day she becomes more and more like him and it’s terrifying. She is him. She could kill us.

“Incident?” Luna whispers under her breath. She can’t think of any incidents that would warrant her mom being afraid of her. She now knows why her mom was always adamant that she take her vitamins everyday though.

Luna flips back a few pages to see if there’s any specific mention of an incident. She wishes her mom would have dated her entries so she would have a better idea of what she may be talking about.

She wanted ice cream at the store. When I told her no she got upset. She began yelling until the glass on the freezers in the store all shattered. She wasn’t bothered by it at all. No one could explain it. No one knew it was her. The store manager apologized and let Luna have whichever ice cream she wanted saying sorry that this incident scared her. He doesn’t realize she was the reason for it. He doesn’t realize he likely saved my life by letting her have the ice cream.

“What the fuck?” Luna thinks back trying to remember that time. She doesn’t remember glass shattering or even getting a free ice cream at the store. She flips a few more pages in disbelief that this is about her. No way it could be.

She wanted to go swimming but we told her not today. We’re running out of excuses. She didn’t like that. The kitchen table collapsed. We decided to take her to spare any more damage. Even with sunscreen she got a terrible burn. If anything I hope this will deter her from wanting to go swimming again. If she gets another burn I’m not sure I’ll be able to handle treating her again. I love her. I hate him. He did this to her. To all of us. He killed them and I won’t rest until he’s gone. I will find Park Hyungwon and make him answer for what he’s done.

Luna recalls getting a sunburn. It was her first one and it was terribly painful. Her skin bubbled as if it were melting and she felt like she was going to die. The only thing that seemed to help the pain was the fact that she bit her lip so hard from the agony that it started to bleed. The pain in her lip suddenly overwhelmed the pain all over her body. And then there was no pain at all. Somehow that helped her fall asleep that night. She doesn’t remember the kitchen table collapsing but she remembers they got a new one suddenly.

“LuLu,” Jungkook says hating to tear her from what looks like a rough moment of realization for her. “You’ll have to go through it later. We really can’t stay here much longer.”

Luna looks up at Jungkook trying to mask the tears beginning to well in her eyes. “They were afraid of me.” Her voice trembles at the hard truth that the people she loved most in this world were absolutely terrified of her.

“I know they still loved you though,” Jungkook says unsure if his words are of any relief.

“I know,” she says through the knot in her throat. She stuffs the journal in her backpack and stands. “I think I have everything I need for now.”

“Are you sure?” Jungkook asks wiping a rogue tear from her cheek.

Luna nods afraid if she opens her mouth again the flood gates would open. She steps around Jungkook to walk out the door but he reaches his arm out to stop her. He pulls her into his chest without a word and holds her there for a moment.

“Hold on,” he says struggling to find the strength to say anything else. He can feel her pain even if she claims she’s ok. He kisses the top of her head hoping she feels his sincerity.

Luna allows herself to sink into Jungkook’s body. His solid arms and warm chest are comforting in this moment of grief and sorrow. She wishes she could stay molded to him until the end of her days.

“I’ll get you home,” he says carrying her out the door.

He jumps to the roof and quickly and quietly gets Luna back to the portal. He doesn’t give her a choice, he grips her tight and transports back to Korealis. The car ride is quiet. Jungkook takes her back to his mother’s house and they both quietly walk to the bedroom.

As much as Luna knows she needs to sleep, she needs to read more of her mom’s journal. She sits on the edge of the bed and pulls the journal out of her backpack and begins at the very first page.

“Do you want to get some rest first?” Jungkook asks already knowing what her answer will be.

Luna shakes her head not looking up.

“At least come eat the dinner my mom made,” he says taking her hand and pulling her off the bed. “You can read while you eat.”

Luna follows him to the kitchen without protest. Her eyes are still glued to her mother’s words. She sits at the table reading while Jungkook prepares them both a plate. She doesn’t look up to see what he’s doing. She doesn’t look up to see the food he placed in front of her. She doesn’t look up to see where her hand is going as she blindly tries to feed herself. She doesn’t respond to Jungkook’s chuckle and sigh before he takes it upon himself to feed her while she continues reading. The world outside this journal barely exists.

Her mom never dated anything in the book. Luna can’t remember half of the things mentioned so it’s hard for her to know when these things took place. The first few entries are about Luna’s temper that seems to have been getting worse. Apparently her parents tried everything they could to help her manage her anger as a child. They began noticing things moving around whenever Luna was upset. It quickly evolved from moving things to breaking things. Her mom details a day when Luna had broken a wind chime they had hanging in the backyard. The chime flew so hard into her mom’s face that it left a bruise on her cheek. Thats when the fear began. That’s when they realized they were losing control of her. That’s when her mom was even more determined to find Hyungwon and make him pay for what he’s done.

“Jungkookie,” Luna says softly. She finally looks up to see him frozen staring back at her with kimchi hanging out of his mouth. “Why can’t I remember anything she mentions in here?”

“Well,” he says slurping the kimchi into his mouth. “The night you fell into your coma you didn’t remember killing the guy before you passed out. Maybe you’d remember things if you had better control of your power.”

“How can I control it better?”

“Practice. And controlling your emotions. I noticed the stronger your feelings are the stronger your power is. If you can control your emotions then you can control your power.”

“Can you teach me?”

“I thought you’d never ask,” he smiles puffing his chest out.

“You know what, never mind because you seem way too proud that I asked you.”

“Too late. Training starts tomorrow.”

“You’re not going to work me to death are you?”

“Of course not. But maybe close,” he chuckles.

“I would like to unenroll from this class.”

He stands up taking both of their plates and putting them in the sink. “Get some sleep, you have a long day of training to get through tomorrow.”

“No I said unenroll.”

“Too late LuLu, you’re stuck.” He pulls her from the chair and drags her to bed. “You have a lot to learn.”

“But I don’t want to,” she whines laying down on her pillow.

“Don’t be such a baby,” he laughs laying next to her and pulling her into his arms. “It’ll be fun.”

“I don’t think we have the same definitions of fun.”

“Sure we do, LuLu.”

“Luna.”

“You’ll see tomorrow.”

“I’m going to complain the whole time,” she teases.

“That’s fine, you’re still going to do it though,” he laughs.

The next morning Luna wakes up to the feeling of something wet on her chest. She’s laying on her back and blinks a few times until the ceiling above her is clear. She looks down and sees Jungkook’s head resting on her chest with a stream of drool trailing from his agape mouth down between her breasts.

“Ew!” She says hitting him.

Jungkook groans then grabs her tighter.

“You’re drooling on me, you big demon!” She hits him again.

“Good,” he mumbles sticking his tongue out and brushing it against her skin.

“Gross!”

She pushes him away and he looks up through his mess of hair covering half of his face. He laughs then gets close up in front of her face.

“How is that gross when your tongue has been in my mouth before?” He smirks.

That really smug shit eating smirk. The one that Luna can’t even fight because she knows the truth, and she loves the way he looks when he’s nothing but a mess of hair and one piercing red eye peering through them. She bites her lip trying to fight her smile, but he’s no fool. He brushes his black curl aside and plants his lips on hers. She doesn’t fight him for a second. He’s hypnotizing.

“Time for training,” he smiles. He’s taunting her with that smile and she knows it.

Luna fights a little not wanting to get out of bed once Jungkook revealed to her that it was 5 am. If she doesn’t have anything to do she would much prefer to sleep in until noon. But she does have something to do. Jungkook was dead serious about teaching her to control her power. So much so she’s almost certain he’s doing it more for himself than her.

He has an outfit of dark gray leggings and a black tank top picked out for her already that he says is perfect for the physical activity he’s about to put her through. She doesn’t even know why he has a brand new outfit ready for her in the closet of his mom’s house, but he says his mom got the wrong size but never got around to returning them.

He won’t tell her that’s a lie. He won’t tell her that he’s bought a few things here and there online the past week. He won’t tell her that he’d been sending all of the gifts to his mom’s house waiting for the right opportunity. He won’t tell her that he already has a closet full of gifts just for her.

He puts Luna in his car and begins driving her to their training destination. The sparring room in the palace.

It takes a small pep talk and a few assurances for Jungkook to convince Luna that she’d be ok going back there. He tells her that his father wouldn’t be up this early so she doesn’t have to worry. They get into the sparring room and Jungkook closes and locks the door.

“Why did you bring me here?” Luna asks. “You could have trained me anywhere.”

“This is the only place where you can blow my dad into the wall and not cause structural damage,” he says. “If you lose control I’ll at least know you won’t tear the entire place down.”

“Is it really that bad?”

“We can fix it,” he assures.

He starts by making her do a few stretches. She isn’t sure why he’s acting like she’s about to try out for the Olympics, but he maintains his intensity. After a few warm up exercises he moves on to having her do some weightlifting. She hasn’t worked out like this in all her life, not even back when she played softball. She’s quickly getting exhausted and struggling to keep up with his nonstop training.

“What does any of this have to do with me controlling my power?” She whines.

“Because you’re weak, and if you’re weak you won’t be able to control anything. Also, it’s clear your power is stronger than you are. You’ll keep knocking yourself out if you’re not strong enough.” He waves his hand to signal for her to do another set of squats but she doesn’t move.

“Give me like five minutes,” she says out of breath.

“Five seconds,” he says sternly. “Come on, one more set.”

Luna groans in defiance not moving. Jungkook takes her arm but she resists.

“Come on, LuLu, you can do 10 more squats.” He grabs her hips getting ready to guide her but she continues to fight back.

“No, Jungkook baby, I can barely stand right now. I can’t do any more,” she whines.

Her hands are pressed into his chest to get him to let her be done with the torture. He doesn’t move. He looks at her with his head tilted as if he isn’t sure he heard her right. The words slid through her lips so casually as if it were nothing, but to him it was everything. She’s never called him “baby” before, and now that she has he doesn’t know how to react. Nothing has ever sounded so beautiful to his ears.

“Ok then,” he says bending down. He wraps his arms around her thighs just below her ass, then hoists her in the air. “I’ll let you end your training here, Princess.”

“That’s more like it,” she says relieved.

He carries her over to the couch and lays her down but doesn’t let go. He’s leaning over her trying to fight everything in him to not devour her right here and now. Maybe just a little kiss. A little taste to hold him until he can get her to his room.

Just a little kiss.

Jungkook is a greedy man.

Luna is a greedy woman.

Their tongues begin to fight over who’s the greediest. Jungkook’s wandering hand sliding up her thigh is about to win that fight for him. He presses himself further into her chest that’s glistening with sweat. She can feel his heart pounding against her rapidly. He tastes so good to her.

“We use that couch,” Hoseok says, scaring them both.

“Morning,” Jungkook says pulling away from Luna in embarrassment. “What are you doing here?”

“Did you forget we all have keys to this room?”

“I wasn’t locking it because of you guys.”

“Right,” Hoseok sighs. “Well the person you were locking it for is down the hall so you may want to find another place to hide and do…whatever you two do.”

“I thought he’d still be asleep.”

“I don’t think he sleeps much anymore. Not since you left.” Hoseok studies the confusion on Jungkook and Luna’s faces. “Look, I don’t know what he wants exactly, but he’s been everywhere lately. I’m just giving you a heads up. And trying to save the couch that I actually like resting on. Please don’t taint it.”

“Sorry, Hoseok,” Luna giggles. “He was supposed to be teaching me how to control my power.”

“I don’t need to know,” Hoseok says shaking his head to stop the details that hadn’t even begun. “Just use your room. Or any other hiding place that isn’t shared by the rest of us.”

“Thanks for looking out,” Jungkook smiles.

“Now go,” Hoseok says waving them off. “Don’t get into any trouble.”

Jungkook stands and gives Hoseok a salute. “Aye aye,” he says taking Luna’s arm. The pair wave to Hoseok and leave the room.

[awesome-opossum-after-hours]

stranger things rewatch details/thoughts pt 3 (s3 ep1-s3 ep8)

-El kept the baby mask from her sister and its up in her room!

- she also has a large poster of a bird on a beach

- the first store when they walk into Starcourt has a very creative name. "Camera Repair"

- the girl behind Max in the movie theater is MAD annoyed at them. they talk (before the movie starts), and she shushes them. they pass snacks, and she shushes them. rude

-the Scoops Ahoy menu sign quite literally calls it an "Ocean of Flavors"

-i wonder if Will remembers much of the events of s2, or at least the possesion/exorcism. it seems to flood back to him in the theater

-ah wait, Yurtle WAS relocated! totally forgot, could've sworn he was a goner.

-poor "lard-ass". hope he's okay

-Hopper's hatred of Mike is too funny I kinda hope it continues, even if he does loosen up

-god Hopper reminds me so much of my dad. he went as him for Halloween a few years back, and I was s3 El :)

-did Dustin follow Steve's advice in getting Suzie? pretend not to care?

-a buck 25 for a scoop of ice cream sounds fantastic

-a lot of cosplayers forget this with "Scoops Ahoy" Robin but the letters on the You Rule/You Suck board are multicolored. red underneath, black traced slightly off. in Graphics that's a technique used to create a 3D effect, and I'd like to think that was her intention bc she seemed that artsy :)

-God I adore how much you can see the amount of love in Hop's eyes when he's watching Joyce help a customer. when will someone look at me like that oml

-Joyce and Bob were watching Fraiser in the flashback

- Mike has some serious nerve telling the father of his girlfriend and the goddamn Chief of Police that he's a "lying piece of shit"

-Max calls Lucas "Don Juan" 🥺

-if you watch the first Russian message scene with English captions it gives away what it says lmao

-Hopper joyfully singing along to You Don't Mess Around With Jim owns my heart

-Steve already HAD chesthair in s3. you can see it if he leans over in the Scoops uniform ;) do with that what you will

-Lucas is continuing his streak of winning Max back after her dumping him. 6 and 0

- when El and Max are playing the spying version of Spin the Bottle, the people on the wheel are Dustin, Mr Clarke, Mrs Wheeler, Mr Wheeler, Steve, Nancy, and (of course) Billy

- Will's persona of "Will the Wise" is a LOT more assertive than he normally is. bet that'll come in clutch in s5

- Hopper has no shame opening the door in just a towel lmao

- happy screams...

-Max using the iconic 80s phrase "ugh, gag me with a spoon!"

- I completely forgot the whole "Dustin wanting Steve and Robin to date" thing happened before s4

-Robin was apparently a theater kid (which made her "weird" in the Old Steve's standards). she also played soccer

-still not over how Mike and Lucas mock Will's DnD game and act all bored with it and then continue to play DnD really seriously in high school

-the whole "Robin being a lesbian and Steve her emotional support himbo" decision really WAS last minute bc there's a few hints pretty early in the season that would normally lead to 2 characters eventually falling in love (aka- on the rooftop of Starcourt when they have to duck down to avoid the Russians, Steve and Robin do the whole "unintentionally holding hands in danger" thing)

-the way Billy is standing and acting in the scene in Heather's house is INSANELY similar to Henry Creel in the rainbow room (down to the creepy smile and the hands clasped in front)

-Hopper breaks the mayor's nose. guess the apple doesn't fall far from the tree, blood relation or not

- "if you die, I die" - said Dustin, with total seriousness, to Steve. this better NOT be foreshadowing

-when El wears Sarah's hairtie as a bracelet, it covers up her number tattoo

-oh my GOD Jonathan getting whacked with the hospital stool looked WAYYYYY more brutal than I remember... how the hell did he not get paralyzed

-at first i thought that Hopper's eventual escape route from the machine explosion was adding afterwards for Plot Armor, but that's not true! when the Scoops Troop is running from the Russians they take the same escape route underneath the machine

-the door out to Murray's wonderful little "backyard" says "Keep Door Closed"

-I don't blame Alexei, cherry slurpees are far superior to strawberry

-Erica being a total math genius is something that HAS to be brought up again

-when Robin spits in the Russian's face, he says "you're going to regret that, suchka". suchka, translating in the subtitles as "little bitch"

-after the hospital, everyone must've taken a well needed shower before heading to Hop's cabin

-i would die for Karen Wheeler's FunFair dress

-can we talk about the fact that other than El, Dustin is the only kid to ever K1LL SOMEONE??? I mean maybe he just got wiped out but that Russian doctor looked very not alive

-did Todd ever get his car back

-the answer is hopefully no. screw Todd, Steve's her daddy now

-I think if I had to choose one of these monsters to NEVER have to fuck with ever it'd be the flesh monster. sure Vecna can kill you from your own mind but something about fighting melted humans/rats feels so very wrong and traumatizing

-Steve's been in a vehicle poorly driven by children twice

-if Joyce doesn't stick to this Detective Byers plan in s5 I'm gonna cry

-also I need to physically SEE the Enzo's date, even if it's a flashback

-Dustin and Erica staying at the hill means that they had no way of knowing if the Griswold Family was alive, or whether or not Steve and Robin were headed on a su1c1de mission

-I'd be shittin me britches if i was in that mall no lie

- the flesh monster mind flayer must have some sort of eyes in its tentacles because it tried to catch a mannequin that was wearing El's outfit

-662608004 was the code Murray wrote, but the real password was 662607004. all he got wrong was the 7. come on Bald Eagle

-they straight up left Max, El, and Mike at the mall

-according to Hopper, gunfire is the universal language for "EVERYBODY OUT!"

-Max and Billy lived on 4819 Cherry Hill Lane

-on that TV ad, when they suggest a rise in Satanism is cursing the town, they zoom in on a Dungeon Master's Handbook

-the epilogue says it's 3 months after the 4th of July, AKA October. but it's implied that the party is still just them, so maybe they joined the Hellfire Club in the middle of the year

-Dustin doesn't wear his hat when he's sad

-someone actually bought the Byers' house. fuck that, man I'd firmly believe it's cursed

-was El staying in Will's room? because she's seen packing up her stuff but the Byers only had a 3 bedroom house

-we all know that Steve wears lipgloss this season but I'm also convinced that Mike is in the epilogue

-Mike didn't seem to enjoy that goodbye kiss as much as he was expecting...

[stfu-im-thinking-abt-blorbo]

Thoughts about each TDI Reboot episode, starting at 1. SPOILERS UNDER THE READMORE.

Chris' new voice is certainly... a change. I don't mind it, and I think Terry is getting his acting and emotes for him right, but it's definitely gonna take some time to adjust and not immediately think it's Don.

"Hey, what's up I'm here to slay" from the intro is killing me in the best and worst ways. Rip the old intro song.

Also there's a very VERY small detail for the campfire. When Raj looks back to the screen, only one of his eyes follow. Either an animation error, or he has a lazy eye.

It's been 15 years since the beginning of the show in canon?? That means the gen 1 and 2 casts are roughly between 28-31 I think?? And yet Chris and Chef Hatchet don't look any different. Also since og Island premiered in 2007, this one is taking place in 2022 and NOT 2023.

Either way this gives me a good excuse to practice character design with a 15 years timeskip and make adult designs for the gen 1 and 2 casts.

Priya. WHAT. GIRL GO TO THERAPY AND GET AWAY FROM YOUR PARENTS. Also Owen cameo.

Bowie is gay like I thought he'd be. Now way he wasn't a reference to David Bowie. Getting some vibes of him being the new Heather tbh.

I, like many others, thought Ripper was going to be the new Owen. He's only a small bit Owen with a dash of Duncan, and a whole lot of Scott. Respect to Ripper for how spicy he likes his food, tho lol.

Chase and Emma are exes. Chase is a YouTube/Twitch personality T-T. Here's hoping that Emma broke up with him bc she's a lesbian. Really want her and Bowie to be besties.

Scary Girl's real name is Lauren >:(

Zee is both the smartest and dumbest character. I want him to be the blorbo of the season, but I'm getting the feeling it's gonna be Bowie.

Wayne: "What'd you think, Rajey?" 🥺

Nichelle is the only one to not get an audition tape. Interesting. Also a Madonna reference?

Julia called herself an influencer. She better be an early boot for that.

MK, Axel, Caleb and Damien are the only ones I don't have any comments about. Sucks 'cause I was hoping I'd really like MK and Axel.

Drone of Dispair. Somehow the worst idea yet lol. Can't wait for a joke about one of the contestants flying over private airspace and getting shot.

Ripper called himself the alpha male nooooo

EVEN BOWIE IS CALLING WAYNE AND RAJ GAY LMAO

And Bowie immediately goes to the girls' side of the cabin to talk shit about Chase with Emma. Love them sm.

Ripper: "Where'd you get the soda from??"

Zee: "...I have no idea."

Rip Bowie's heart glasses, hope cartoon logic kicks in and he has a million of then.

If Damien thinks they can't show Ripper's censored ass on TV, then I wonder what his reaction would be to a show like Naked and Afraid.

Emma and Chase didn't break up over lesbianisms unfortunately. But messing up her car's breaks and causing her to crash is still a valid reason for her to break up with him and be incredibly upset. Like, he could have killed her, other bystanders, or any of the puppies at the shop she crashed into. Yet I think the show is treating Emma as being unreasonable? It's just a prank bro.

Also MK calling Emma out for saying 25% of the money instead of half like she did when talking to Bowie earlier. Maybe there's more to the break up story?? Like she's lying?? But that still wouldn't make sense if the show is already treating her as unreasonable beforehand. Idk.

Bowie really do be like "are the straights okay? 🙄"

Raj: "Wayners" 😭

Also Wayne and Raj both have the same accent as Ezekiel.

Goodbye Caleb, we barely knew ya. Have fun hanging out with Staci and getting no character development like her. Maybe one day he can come back like Justin.

BOWIE IS THE NEW HEATHER, I WAS RIGHT AND HE IS GONNA BE THE BLORBO

Overall, fun first episode. Not a smash hit or anything, but a pretty good hook. Also the animation and character design is such an upgrade. I was hesitant about the new cast's designs, but actually seeing them in the show and moving makes it work so much better to me. After rewatching the first half of og Island, it is amazing to see how far this show and its animators have come from 2007.

[chaosslibrarian]

ACOSF SUCKS

So I read ACOTAR through to ACOWAR like two years ago. Good for just getting back into reading. Decided to “reread” now because I needed a ~meh~ book to fall asleep to. ACOTAR was good to sleep to, ACOMAF was okay but I got pissed off towards the end lmao. Skipped ACOWAR, went to ACOFAS and that was alright to sleep to

ACOSF ignited my fury so much I was awake all night. How fucking DARE Rhysand? Amren can fuck off, too. Mor, Azriel, and Elain are just so??? Eh. But this book should be called “A Cort of Character Assassination” because with 25% left I want to hurl everyone out of a window.

The two previously most powerful characters are now throwing a fit and doing everything they can to make sure the actually most powerful person gets no agency or say

Spoilers

Like how fucking DARE Rhysand hide the dangers of the pregnancy from Feyre? Like “oh she’ll be sad”?? IT’S HER BODY AND HER LIFE RHYS you’re no better than Tamlin. I hope Feyre handed him his ass and cut off his dick for that stunt. Because threathening to kill Nesta because she dared to tell Feyre the truth? Never have I wanted to punch a charachter as much as I wanted to punch him. I wanted Cassien to sock him, but Cassien is such a “oh no can’t stand against my highlord!” like weren’t you calling yourself brothers two seconds ago? Rhysand FUCK OFF

And Amren?? With the whole “you don’t deserve your power” tantrum?? Doesn’t matter what Nesta deserves because it’s HER power, and she and Rhys had no right to keep Nesta from knowing her powers. Like what is ignorance meant to do? Make the powers go away?? Has that worked? No. Your thousands of years old Amren, don’t be so fucking dumb.

Then there’s the whole STEALING from Nesta with “these relics were meant for YOU Rhys” like they’re SCRAMBLING to get some upperhand over Nesta because they can’t stand that she’s more powerful than them, so they steal and take credit from her. “The cauldron gave powers to Nesta to make sure you got these items” like what? Nesta STOLE those powers which is why she went through what she did and what’s happening is happening.

Also when other characters are given hundreds plus years to recover from their trauma, but Nesta is like a year from a massively traumatic event and they’re staging an intervation because... she spent what’s the equivalent of a sneeze to the court in one night.

Like was SJM trying to make the fearies more cruel or something midway through? Like wtf HAPPENED? Rhys and Amren were always kind of sketchy, but they made up for their shitty personality in different ways... this book is just a FUCK RHYS AND AMREN book

[shortstack-21]

Rant:

Working in a company as one of two marketing specialists for an entire international company with four divisions is so crazy sometimes. Plus the language barrier is very hard but I love my overseas coworkers. So,I handle two divisions and the other guy we will call Norman handles the other two.

And let me tell you something, Norman doesn't know shit. I've been trying to do a lot of things to get this company on the right track and one of them is addressing or SEO and lack of marketing tactics. Now, I'm not usually a competitive person but after two years of being bypassed or not seen as someone who STUDIED digital marketing but... I surpassed them in domain authority and lead generation! I got them to the point where we brought in MULTIPLE multi-million dollar leads from the website and gave them a platform to be proud of (I work in the med device industry)

My main division that I work on had a domain authority of 10 and within six months of hard work I got us to 45!

Now here's the main reason I'm going to not be humble or modist (that might be the better word here) and move on. The other division is sitting at a 25 and they have refused to let me assist when I brought it to their attention that there are things wrong with their website and I can help them because they don't really have the man power to do it.

I was dismissed and told that I was still new to the company even though I've been working for two years. In the same meeting he goes and says okay ladies you can go we have important materials to go through. I was dismissed like I was nothing. I am the marketing coordinator and these materials included my two divisions regarding trade shows and lead generation goals.

I, a disabled woman, fought hard for my position as a marketing coordinator and I got my division on top! It's a small thing and I know that but it took me fighting for over a year to get the tools to be able to get them where they need to be. It was rough and I wanted to quit every time I was asked why leads weren't coming in. When they asked that question I would have to remind them we weren't advertising or doing any type of marketing. I would give them a marketing plan and was told they weren't ready or belittled me because I didn't have enough experience.

I will still hear how Norman needs to give his opinion and be dropped off all important marketing decisions until it is brought to my desk with a lecture on why it's not finished yet. Meanwhile, Norman thinks colors and brand consistency doesn't matter and he refuses to work with me. He believes blogs will save us all (news flash it doesn't. It's only one SMALL part of digital marketing). Norman has been here for ten+ years and can't even define simple marketing terms and tells me "I don't know I just do what they tell me." Like this man can't even think for himself!

But for now I shall bathe in this victory that I a disabled woman who has only worked in this company for two years got my division to it's goal and blew the other division out of the water!

With the recent election I just hope my company sees me as a person who has worked her ass off to get them high quality digital leads. Still job searching and if I honestly didn't have an apartment or need health insurance I'd quit.

Okay my rant is over... ALL THE SEXIST AND ABLEIST MEN IN MY COMPANY CAN FUCKING SUCK IT!!!!

Okay now I'm done.

[poetryofyouth]

You would think people in the social-medical field would know better, but i don't think most of them care!

I had to quit because of the amount of harassment that goes on there. I excelled in my studies but was having panick attacks every single day because of how awful the people in that sector can be. The theory that lots of bullies chose the med field because it gives them access to vulnerable people who can't fight back is so, so true.

My boss once told me "You're not special, we made [colleague] cry and want to quit 3 weeks before her finals" and i was like??? and you're proud of that???

Sorry for the rant, lots of unresolved frustrations there. I feel so bad because my specialisation focuses on the elderly.

Geez nonny I am so sorry to hear that!

I have heard plenty of medschool horror stories from people I know. At the Vienna MedUni there seem to be a couple professors who have made it a point of pride to be cruel to students. One supposedly needs to make someone cry every lesson. And that is like, something that every student of this university knows about and no one really gives a fuck because ig that dude has tenure so they just let him abuse 19-year-olds idk

It is maybe a bit of an "survival of the coldest" problem. Many Healthcare professionals burn out and/or leave the field. The ones that are often the ones who are the bullies, who don't care so much about their patients.

Idk where you're from nonny but here (Austria) it feels like the medical system is like, 3-5 years before collapsing if there is not sweeping structural change, especially the public medical system, but it is not even limited to that. I mean I have always gone to private psychiatrists and therapists for the most part, too, (bc who can, when they can barely think about surviving another week, just wait another 6 months for a first appointment???? If they even give you an appointment at all, that is) and all of them except my current psychiatrist SUCKED ABSOLUTE MOTHERFUCKIGN ASS. And I paid them upwards of 120 Euros for 25 minutes of telling me I was just not trying hard enough. I mean what the fuck. Why do you even go into a profession where you are supposed to listen to and help people if you don't want to listen and help.

Sorry now I have gone a bit off topic from your ask. Lots of still unresolved issues here for me, too.

I hope you are in a better field now nonny and taking care of yourself. It sucks that the medical field keeps losing good people just because the conditions suck. In ways that I believe could be fixed, at least big parts of it, but that would maybe mean a few years of investing into the healthcare system and THAT ain't gonna happen anytime soon lmao.

[creepycrawliesinyourwalls]

rambling; online diary

i truely believe i can do heroin and not be addicted. i've been on dilaudid before, ive gotten high off my ass on weed, i took some vyvanse to see how itd go, and ultimately it was boring. being high is kinda boring. i complain about not having my cart, sure. but being so fr rn i do it for show. no one would ever believe me in a million years, but it is genuinely for show.

i have a hard time defining myself as a person, given the disorders i have. anything and everything that i could add to myself to humanize myself is a positive, never a negative. humanity is by definition flawed and faulty, if i have a flaw im more easily humanized.

im also incapable of being perfect, though if i wasn't abused to the point of my brain never fully forming a cohesive personality, i'm sure id be a prodigy. if my brain genetically disabled, i'd be top of my class, 4.0 gpa with honors.

with dissociative identity disorder, autism, adhd, bipolar 1, ptsd, clinical depression, arfid, and probably some sort of personality disorder, its hard to care about anything at all. these are only the mental and neurological disorders and defects, too.

inherently i was given the worst hand i could have gotten in birth. my potential is wasted, trapped inside this failure of a body. i could have been so much more. my face is somewhat conventionally attractive, so theres a win.

im confident that without my memory issues, joint pain, and depression i could be a full blown doctor. i have to settle for marketing, because my gpa currently is too low to get into engineering. i wanted to do mathematics for awhile to get into finance or something. i wanted to do geology bc my special interest is rocks, but i don't want to work for an oil company.

if i am not constantly improving with my life in any aspects, if i am stagnant for a stretch of time, i consider it a failure.

i do not have a personality, at least nothing coherent and consistent. some people say im loud, some say im shy. sweet, mean, smart, dumb, its all contradictory traits.

i consider myself better then most of the people i choose to be friends with. a good lot of them (danny, chloe, viktor) will probably never go to college. kaden might go, but im sure she'd just party the whole time. alix is maybe the only one who i'd even consider on my level, since he's aiming for law and finds debates enjoyable. he has the drive and determination to do well in life, and is at the very least takes steps to get where he wanted to get.

chloe wanted to get into medicine and be a doctor. she is chronically disabled and was failing half of he classes. from disabled to disabled person, there is no way in hell you are making it that far. id be surprised if she made it past 25, honestly. she viewed mental hospitals as a vacation, even excluding the morals on that view, its incorrect. she believed she wasn't addicted to her medication, and that it actually helped her. she never even tried.

i am beginning to become fond of alix, though. i hope my headmates realize how much better his is compared to others. taylor and vee are already fond of him, which is a good sign.

we seem to be improving our depression symptoms and dissociative amnesia, and we joined a cbt program to further along process after being voluntarily admitted to a psychiatric facility. (yes, we did ask to go. we were going to kill ourselves as soon as we were alone, we needed immediate help.) i want to work on breaking down our gatekeepers resolve, and get us to a place where we can work on final fusion. i would also like to address our npd traits, but our therapist wouldnt believe us, so ill have to work on that myself.

we haven't been practicing our religion as much as we used too, its kind of sad. we send a prayer up to apollo occasionally, and he usually answers. but otherwise we havent done any spell work. its sucks to admit it, and god to i want to delete this paragraph but i need to work on vulnerability to create and foster friendships that are mutually beneficial.

ive never seen the point of online friends, i think the concept is pointless. i've tried doing it, and everytime we ended up ghosting them. the effort did not match the spoils. if im going to have friends, i need them to invest in me before i invest in them. it can be materially, emotionally, or physically. as long as i gain benefits, you will too.

[localgardenweed]

Omg I kinda wanna be your friend so bad because:

-I too am a Japan Self-shipper

-I am also a Osomatsu fan and to a lesser extent Toilet Bound Hanako-kun, way of the house husband, Code name kids next door

-You are a great artist!

-You seem fun, funny and friendly!

-I am pretty sure we have the same pronouns lol! I think I have a different preference order though

Reasons why I am unsure and nervous:

-I am just shy

-I have only two friends and haven't made friends in years, I think I have forgotten how

-I have low self confidence and feel like I might be a bad person

-You are a great artist and I should be better at art by now (in general not better than you, I am still at the stage where it is hard to grasp what I am drawing)

-I just realized you are under 18 and I am way older than you. I much rather keep you safe and make sure you feel safe. I honestly, am not sure if it is OK to even write this.

Spinning around the room of my brain rn squealing and jumping up and down. It’s completely fair why you’re a little hesitant, and also like good job being like “maybe its a little unsafe being friends with a minor as a older person” like dont mind interacting i love chatting so dont ever feel you need to block yourself im ok with the casual talk but yeah sometimes i get scared of much older people when we talk like more often and not once in a while IM SCARED OF ADULTS (Basically anyone older than 25) AND IM ALMOST A ADULT THATS SCARY IMMA BE THE VILLAIN I AM THE ENEMY. Ask in 5 to 10 years then we can talk and be besties for life

I have a little sneaking feeling who you are i check who likes and reblogs my stuff its how i keep the dnis out of my space, and dont worry if your art isn’t “as good” as it should be man, it takes time takes work and sometimes it may not work out but that doesn’t mean its shitty or not worth anything, as long as it makes you happy what else matters, improve cause you want to mot cause you should. Everyone starts drawing like for realsies and not just the occasional at different points, i started like taking art seriously like in 3rd grade maybe 1st grade idk blurry but i got alot of years under my belt already and still so much more man. We all have our strengths and weaknesses in art like realism, could never do it. And thats okay

Build up that self confidence, dont feel the need to rush it cause that too takes time! You need to know you’re awesome sauce and if you really feel you’re a bad person, take some time to think and ask why you think you are and how you can fix it, like REALLY think about it not a “i forgot to say thank you to the barista i am a monster” no you just made a mistake and forgot smth you arent horrible you’re fine. If you threw the boiling hot cup of coffee at the barista for using cow milk instead of goat milk thats a problem, fix that, get some help.

Sorry if this like a jumbled mess too i wrote this when i originally got it then came back to it later after brain farting and life busy but now i have finally finished my epic rant i hope this was acceptable sorry if this sucked major ass