#this would work well as an SCP extended test log

[manorinthewoods]

"Anything."

"Anything!"

"Can I plant the universe in it?"

The Keeper of Heroic Elixir frowned. "You have to be able to fit it in the dirt."

"The limitations on this are still downright Semantic," I said. If I were a more pious hero, I would have prayed to the Keeper of Speech and Law, but no responses ever came from the immense array of geometry in the sky, so I saw no point.

"...I don't like your tone," said the Keeper of Heroic Elixir. "I have heard that tone so very often."

I examined the dirt. It looked to be enough to firmly plant an object of a cubic meter in volume, at maximum.

I picked up my reward and got to work.

Experiment 1; Human corpse

With some prior experimentation, I had determined that, planting a seed in the spring, I would always get useful results in the autumn. I'd spent around a decade testing this. Luckily, I had time to spare for the hundreds of experiments I'd thought up; even ignoring the ability to plant multiple crops in tandem, the Keeper of Heroic Elixir had recently rewarded me with a vial of eternal life for my latest impossible feat. He had told me, off the record, that he had done so because he was very much looking forward to seeing the unique problems I would generate, as they would almost certainly require heroic intervention. (I have already created a dozen problems of minor heroic class. Turns out, once the plant has grown for a year in the magic soil, it can be transplanted without further issue.)

Unfortunately for me, planting a human corpse did not work out, nor did any other sorts of corpses. Flesh seems to fail to agitate the soil into growing things. However...

Experiment 2; Human skeleton

Bone seems to work just fine.

The product of my planting two human skeletons in the soil (one disassembled, one assembled) was an enormous bone garden, as expected. A sage's analysis revealed that it is, indeed, magically potent human bone, bursting from the earth. I offloaded this product onto a necromancer, naturally.

Experiment 3; Dragon tooth

As expected, it grew warriors. Unexpectedly, the dragon tooth has grown into a soldier tree. This tree simply grows fully equipped and disciplined soldiers of exceptional skill. It also grows fruits which contain seeds of more dragontooth trees, and with some crossbreeding, I managed to make the dragontooth tree grow orcish soldiers as well.

This product was sold to an enterprising villain. I have heard that he has used it to create a massive marauding army which sustains itself mainly upon cannibalism. I am impressed and heartened.

Experiment 4; Golden apple

Although I'm transitioning from a hero to a sage (and I expect I'll turn into a villain eventually), I still found some time to adventure while my garden was growing. This lovely golden apple the Keeper gave me successfully grew exactly what was anticipated: a tree of more golden apples, despite the fact that golden apples do not, in fact, have an actually accessible tree. The Keeper is theolegally obligated to inform heroes of the supposed origins of the golden apples, the Tree of Eden, but the Tree of Eden does not exist, and this is a well-known fact. Now it does, in fact, exist. I naturally entrusted it to a sage for safekeeping.

Experiment 5; Various metallic objects

My landlord threatened to repossess my magic garden if I didn't pay rent, so I planted some gold, silver, and various basic treasures in the ground, along with a mithril shield, adamantium katana, and iron sword.

My treasures all grew into an entwined golden tree which has many bulbs that it fills with jewelry, gems, and gold and silver coins. Unfortunately, this tree does not have any way to reproduce. I still sold it, although I directed it to El Dorado instead of normal merchants (gotta keep the economy safe somehow).

The mithril shield unfortunately became a mithril briar. Completely indestructible, and the mithril unfortunately cannot be used for forging, as it is highly flammable and produces toxic smoke. This briar overran the entire land and I needed to get a hero to help me with it. Luckily, the weapons didn't get overrun by the briar.

The katana produced a ninja bush. It grows ninjas. I sold it to a ninja-employing villain, because I have no use for ninjas. The iron sword, on the other hand, grew into a singular person who has many sword-related abilities. I christened him Kargob and sent him on his way.

Experiment 6; A magic globe

This magic globe contained a miniature universe. It grew into an incredibly large sunflower. Each sunflower seed is one of the magic globes. This was an immense success.

Unfortunately for me, the sunflower seeds knocked into each other too much and broke, merging together into a single patchwork universe which ripped a hole in the sky above my garden. A Keeper was formed from the chaos to manage the new pocket universe, which I hear is now very stable and coherent. Unfortunately, I have no ownership of it, and the History Books don't even attribute its creation of it to me, which is very upsetting.

Experiment 7; Book

The Keeper of Heroic Elixir granted me a book describing all of my heroic deeds, as I had by that point become a true sage. I planted it in the ground. It produced a tree (most of these seeds make trees, curiously) which appears to create books examining alternate timelines where I had done different things. Curiously, none of the alternate histories-of-me mention the magical dirt. I sold the tree and the book-fruit it had made to a historical society. I believe they have descended into holy war over it.

Experiment 8; Living human

Having finally found someone who could breathe dirt, I planted them in the field of magic. They emerged as a weak yet extraordinary Keeper, a mammoth tree built entirely out of dendritised human bodies. Although quite interesting, with the base being a massive and very pregnant womb, a group of Keepers came down to my property to cut down the human tree, as its upper branches were getting scarily close to the Solar Earth (which remains above my garden) and were potentially going to invade the nascent planet. This was very sad, and I held a funeral for this brave soul and their brief apotheosis. (I'm not sure what they did with the womb, but I wasn't allowed to observe them remove it, so I assume some eldritch wood-fetus was inside.)

Experiment 9; Human heart

Produced a number of heart-bushes which have hearts on them. The hearts rot immediately after ripening as they have no source of blood. I sold most of the bushes to a cannibal clan in the highlands, who tell me that their garden is going very well.

Experiment 10; Pizza

In response to the demands of the gang of children I acquired*, I planted their favorite variety of pizza in my magic soil. It grew a pizza tree, as expected. It was not very interesting. Most of my creations aren't.

*A baby tree grew in my garden. I don't know why, or how, as I didn't plant it. I suspect someone may have broken into my garden and planted a baby-related object, although I doubt they planted an actual infant or an infant corpse given my previous experiments with humans.

Experiment 11; Steam engine

Produced a horrifying abomination, a hybrid of steel and wood which rapidly ran rampant under the light of the Solar Earth. Heroes were not able to stop it, although it was thrown into the upper atmosphere (along with a significant quantity of my dirt), where it continues to grow rampantly. I will not do this again, although the industrial aberration appears to see me as a father and occasionally drops various bizarre industrial products upon my house, most of which are strange novelty items.

Experiment 12; Explosive device

I'm not sure why (either I angered it or it considers it a gift), but the steam god dropped a bomb into my garden while I was out shopping. It failed to detonate, but used internal mechanisms to burrow into my dirt and grow. This resulted in a tree producing similar explosive devices, which are filled with tiny seeds made out of gunpowder. Planting these (even in mundane soil) results in artful gunpowder imitations of ordinary plants, which somehow maintain rigidity despite being made of explosive dust. Sparks still detonate them.

Experiment 13; Dragon skull

The hapless elder dragon near my home somehow lost her skull the other day, although she seems to be none the worse for wear. She offered the skull to me, so I planted it in the dirt. I am not sure what the product is yet, but it has many wings and has burned down my house.

This is only a small sample of my products, I fear. I have committed hundreds of abominable acts of botany, and most of them have required heroic intervention to solve. I'm not sure how I am neither a villain nor a Keeper, but my current status is acceptable to me.

"The treasure is dirt?" "Yup, magic dirt, absolutely anything planted in it will grow and bear fruit"

[amber-hollyhock]

(SCP 049 x Reader) At the Touch of Your Hands

Summary: Because of SCP 049's lethal touch, you and him are unable to engage in any sort of physical affection. However, you obtain an SCP that might actually provide a solution to this issue. Now, the question is whether or not you are brave enough to test it.

You were facing a thick forest, the tall, jagged silhouettes of its trees looming over you, and its darkness threatening to swallow you whole. You shut your eyes and took a deep breath. You could smell the sweet tang of the pines, the humidity of the summer air, and you could just barely make out the scent of a distant fire. 

You reached into the pocket of your shorts and grabbed the small object concealed within it, running your fingers over its smooth, cold surface. Your heart drummed in your chest, but out of fear or anticipation for what was to come you were not sure. Either way, it did not matter. It was too late to turn back now.

Without further delay, you stepped into the forest before you. You had traversed this route many times, so you could move in the darkness fairly well. As you weaved among the rocks and the trees, the light of a campfire came into view. You squinted, and you could just barely make out someone beside it, their dark figure illuminated by the orange glow. Your pace quickened as you stumbled toward them, like a moth to a flame. 

Finally, you arrived by the campfire, but stopped a few yards away, just out of reach of its glow. A mixture of feelings washed over you as you hesitated to step out into the light of the fire, to step out of your comfort zone and make yourself vulnerable to damage. To death. What if this didn’t work? What if the article was wrong? Was it worth the risk? 

These questions weighed on you, causing you to shrink further from the warm glow of the fire until you cast a glance at the figure ahead: a tall, humanoid dressed in thick dark robes and a ceramic mask with a long, bird-like beak. Your fears melted away, and you felt a sense of safety staring at him. You reached into your pocket and rubbed the item it concealed gently. Yes. It was worth it.

You stepped into the light. SCP 049 sat up. 

“Did you find it?” he asked, his calm voice tainted with urgency. 

You walked over to sit on the log beside him. You reached into your pocket and produced the jade ring. 049’s breath caught at the sight of it. Your hope. Your key to love. You just hoped it would work. 

You looked up and locked eyes with 049. Although many of his features weren’t accessible to you, his eyes shined with great anxiety uncharacteristic of him. 

“Are you certain this will work?” 049 asked.

You gave him a tender, reassuring smile. “It will. I promise.”

You slipped the ring onto your finger. Immediately, a feeling you couldn’t describe washed over you. You must’ve had a funny look on your face because 049 immediately asked if you were okay. You said you were fine. The two of you locked eyes, and you gave a small nod. 

It’s time. 

049 lifted a gloved hand. Perhaps it was only the fire, but you could’ve sworn that his hand was shaking. You reached out your hand as well, breathing quickening as you slowly extended it towards his. 

You looked up at 049. If you died, you wanted him to be the last thing you saw. You drew in a shaky breath and moved your hand to touch 049’s. 

Your pulse spiked. You half expected the world to cut off, leaving you in darkness, but no. 049 was still in front of you. You were still here, and you were touching 049. 

The importance of this moment sunk in, and the two cried out in ecstasy. Your fingers intertwined. 049 pulled you towards him and wrapped his other arm around you. You grabbed his arm, pressing your face into his neck and crying tears of joy. You’d spent weeks fantasizing about this moment, believing it could never come true, but it had, and it was even better than you could’ve imagined. 

You and 049 sat together, whispering soft “I love you”s back and forth. You clung to one another, relishing in the feeling of each other’s bodies.

Time stopped and everything else melted away. All that mattered was here and now, and it was the first time since the murder, since your conviction, since being brought to site 19, since the containment breach, that you had no regrets. Everything that had led up to meeting 049 and being able to hold him had been worth it. And there, on that fateful night, with the fire crackling and the crickets chirping in the background, you fell asleep in 049’s arms. 

[dragonoflord]

SCP-6175-1 instances Log to keep track for possible anomalous properties.  - By Doctor K.

Day 1- “I shall be writing and updating this small log in order to keep track of any possible anomalous effects on SCP-6175 Dolls that we dubbed SCP-6175-1 instances. Until we can determine wether these dolls really have anything going with them or if they are just normal dolls, we’d like to keep track and close eyes on them. As of so far SCP-6175 has been crafting these dolls utilizing materials we’ve never deliberate given to them, and how they find it is still a investigation going on as we speak.” Day 4- “After SCP-6175 been making more of the SCP-6175-1 instances at some point they ended up giving one of their dolls to one my co-workers. Claiming they like the researcher and wish for them to have one of the dolls SCP-6175 had made, to which my co-worker gladly accepted and proposed a opportunity to do some tests on the dolls while she has access to one on the hand. We don’t see much problem with it for the time being but told them to remain cautious about the dolls” Day 12- “So far we’ve discovered nothing out of the ordinary with the instances of SCP-6175-1, at the same time we did discover something troubling as we took a closer inspection on some of  the dolls SCP-6175 had made. One of the dolls they recently created ended up looking extremely a lot like one of the O5 members, specifically [Redacted]. And after inspecting some of the other dolls we suddenly came to a realization how more of them take a resemblance to some of the other personal from this as well other sites. The strangest part about this is that SCP-6175 has never seen or met any of these people. Noticing the doll that looked like [Redacted] we instantly attempted to contact them and we were told to destroy the doll at once, which we ended up doing. Having asked SCP-6175 about the resemblance of other people they claim that they have no idea who any of those people are and simply make dolls to whatever comes into their head at the time.” Day 21- “Aside of a few more times of finding unique looking dolls that shouldn’t make sense being created in terms of the looks,  we simply cannot seem to find any anomalous effects onto the SCP-6175-1 instances itself. Even I was got my hands onto one of these small cute dolls looking somewhat like me,  which SCP-6175 made for me when i requested if they could make one for me about a week ago. They seem to have no problem making dolls for other people which we have tested with both those SCP-6175 knew and never met before. However any test seems to not hold anything unique that we can determine. And it seems they in the end are nothing but simple cute looking dolls. I shall close this log after this and return the doll to SCP-6175  seeing I have no further need for it. Scratch that last part, I can’t believe I’ve been so stupid,  any of us on that matter. No I have found out the anomalous effects on the SCP-6175-1 instances, and it happened right after I gave the doll back to SCP-6175. You see as I walked away from SCP-6175′s containment I couldn’t help but think to myself  feeling somewhat sad how ‘i am somewhat going to miss that cute little doll’ and perhaps wonder if I should get it back. . . And that’s when it struck me,   I don’t give a sh*t about some stupid doll, I’m a grown man and have grown out of doll for a long time already. So then... Why did I felt sad?  Like I’m missing a friend?  Well what if   that is the affect of SCP-6175-1! What if SCP-6175-1 instances simply makes a small bond with it’s current owner, to the point your view on the dolls are   more simple and wanting them to be around. Thinking about it, anyone who’s been given a SCP-6175-1 instance seems to keep the dolls around them to a certain extend. Such as keeping them in their office where they work a lot, or in their backpacks etc. Of course considering my ... current Co-workers let alone the D personal we’ve been given so far did not help finding out about this effect since...  they already act like this sometimes naturally... Yeah It’s not out of character for them to act the way they have been about the dolls. I suppose sometimes I really gotta do everything around here when it comes to the serious stuff..” Day 39- “I believe we’ve gotten a decent understanding of the effects of SCP-6175-1 instances, and this’ll likely be the be the last update I shall add into this log specifically. So far we have determined that any person who is given an SCP-6175-1 instance by SCP-6175 them self, will get bonded to the doll. Those bonded will see the doll less as just a simple object and more as a small little friend you think looks nice or cute to an extend, and you likely want to try and keep them with you as much as you can. Be it keeping it on person almost all the time, or leaving it in a area you tend to be around at a lot such as a office rooms. Anyone who gets separated from the dolls but know they get it back seem to not show any unique signs of distress, but those who’s dolls been taken away or told to return it to SCP-6175 or just straight up destroyed on the spot will start to feel .. Sad You will feel like you lost a small buddy, a friend, and you will think about the dolls, try to remember some fond memories you had with it and again simply feeling sad for a while. This ‘Sadness’ appears to remain at a person for about about a week that we have discovered so far. And the affect as well the ‘being sad’ time period appear to be the same for any person so far, wether they had the doll for a couple hours or many days. We have even tested taking away the doll SCP-6175 personally always carries around,  what we determine to be   .. their own SCP-6175-1 instance tied to them. Results of that were  different,  they instead remained sad and mopey for the whole duration of the doll being taken away from them. To the point they even didn’t bother doing anything else, not even make more SCP-6175-1 instances,  at least not until we returned the doll. We do not know if a person who is ‘bonded’ to a SCP-6175-1 instances for a substantially longer periods of times will act different or similar as to with SCP-6175 them self. to which we specifically did not take away the doll of 2 people and we’ll need to test to see if being bonded for months or years maybe have any different effects or wether it remains the same? As of for now however, determined that the dolls are not treat in any way aside of just a simple sadness would it be removed from you or finding it something you wish to keep with you,  we shall allow SCP-6175 to make more dolls as time go on, and even give them out to other if they so wish. Though the SCP-6175-1 instances are not allowed to be taken outside the site location, and we are to keep a close eye to what kind of dolls SCP-6175 makes. In cases of a SCP-6175-1 instance looking like certain personal that shouldn’t be allowed to exist, then we are to instantly take away and destroy said dolls. I shall now Close off this Log, and we’ll make a new one in the future if we ever find out anything else about the SCP-6175-1 instances.” --------------- And there we have it Voody in the SCP Au dolls do have a unique affect which is very simple and not dangerous. quite literally just that a person end up liking the doll more and wants it around more often, doesn’t really go any further than that. Only to Voody them self would the means of taking it away be different because.. that is not due to the effects of the dolls but simply Voody wanting their favorite doll back. they’re still a kid after all. XD

[phinnsyreads]

Mr. Parker.

Don't look so surprised, you have to have known this day was going to come eventually. One of your fellow boarders was kind enough to let me in. They won't be disturbing us, so please, sit down.

Let me make sure I have the right Jackson Parker.

55 years old. Born in Cleveland, Ohio. Multiple tours in Vietnam. Sentenced to death row for killing his wife’s lover. Date of execution May 19, 1979. Now a professional waiter at one of New York City's finest bistros. And…anyone ever tell you you look like Ernie Hudson? You know, the black Ghostbuster. Maybe I'm just thinking of him because the sequel's coming out in a couple of weeks. Whatever, forget it.

One thing they don't have in your file is your unshakable faith. You believe, in a way that so few others do, that everything happens for a reason.

I might feel the same way if I was one of the rare D-classes who have escaped termination. I have to say, you certainly earned this little life you've made for yourself here.

I saw the footage and the pictures from after the…event. I don't know if you ever had it fully explained to you what happened there. We learned that the creature you decommissioned was responsive to the beliefs of its viewers. One of our guys must have got it into his head that the thing was going to kill everybody. And because he thought that, it did.

Until it got to you, of course.

I know your exit survey was a little while ago, so to refresh your memory, the way you phrased it had to do with "falling back on your faith." You showed, in the face of this blood-drenched monstrosity, unwavering belief that you would make it out of there alive. And because you believed, it was true.

Listen…I'm sorry about what happened to you.

We used to be so callous. Hell, it was to the point of being stupid.

There may �� or may not — be a thing that'll kill you if you blink in the same room as it. So far as we can tell, this thing also shits all over the place. Almost every time we sent some guys in to clean up its mess — snap! Their life's over, just like that. Only just built a robot that can do the cleaning a couple of years ago. It sickens me to think about all the men who never came out of that room, all because we didn't think of them as human. Just a letter and numbers.

But what we need you for, it can't be done by a machine. Look, I've been thinking about this a lot lately…there's something remarkable about the human heart. Don't you agree? No matter how much we want to give up or say "no" to life, the heart still beats. That's all it knows how to do. It keeps on beating: "yes-yes, yes-yes." It's admirable, something so resolute in its work.

And I know how you work, Mr. Parker. You know I'm here for a reason. And I think you know you're meant to do something that will save a lot of lives. If you do this for us — if you do this for me — we'll do everything in our power to make sure you get whatever you want for the rest of your days.

I think I can tell what that expression means.

Let me know when you're ready to go, D-14134.

---------

Item #: SCP-1983

Object Class: Keter (Presumed Neutralized)

Special Containment Procedures: Outpost 54 has been built on the land surrounding SCP-1983 and disguised as a chemical plant. The "plant" building serves as barracks for MTF Chi-13 ("Choir Boys"). All entry points into Outpost 54 are to be guarded at all times. Personnel will review Document 1983-12, which details the cover story to be given to any civilians expressing curiosity.

All MTF personnel must profess strong religious beliefs, per Chi-13 protocols. All ammunition stocked must have a silver or silver-tipped projectile. A 24-hour watch is to be maintained on the front door of SCP-1983-1. Guards are to engage any instances of SCP-1983-2 on sight. No personnel is to approach within five meters of SCP-1983-1 outside of scheduled testing protocol.

UPDATE: Following the Event 1983-23, a stand-down of Outpost 54 has been authorized. A skeleton crew will remain to monitor SCP-1983 for any further activity. Arms intended for use against instances of SCP-1983-2 are to be maintained at Outpost 54 armory.

Description: SCP-1983-1 is a one-story farmhouse in ███████ County, Wyoming. It was abandoned in 1968 after a series of ritual murders, allegedly performed by a "Satanic" cult. Please see capture logs for SCP-████ for further details.

The front door of SCP-1983-1, when opened, appears to contain a spatial anomaly. Neither matter nor light has been observed to exit the doorway, save for instances of SCP-1983-2 (though the anomaly is exothermic).

SCP-1983-1 is accessible through other entrances, including windows, the back door, and entrances cut into the back of SCP-1983-1. However, the front room does not appear to exist inside of SCP-1983-1. Doors that should lead to the front room instead lead to other doors inside the building. Measurements of the inside and outside of SCP-1983-1 are inconsistent. Holes cut through the interior walls of SCP-1983-1 that should lead to the front room lead instead to the outside walls around the front of SCP-1983-1, but stop three meters on either side of the doorway. Attempts to drill into the front room of SCP-1983-1 from the outside have led to the exposure of smaller portions of the anomaly, though instances of SCP-1983-2 have not been observed to exit them. Further attempts to breach the wall have been forbidden by O5-03, due to the possibility of allowing increased potential for instances of SCP-1983-2 to appear.

SCP-1983-2 are bipedal creatures approximately 1.8 meters tall. They are vaguely humanoid, and entirely black in color. They are highly aggressive and will engage any human on sight. When an instance of SCP-1983-2 comes into contact with a human, they extend an upper limb into the human's chest cavity, without any apparent damage to skin or tissues. Through unknown means, they then extract the heart, killing the human. Once it has acquired a human heart, the instance of SCP-1983-2 will return to SCP-1983-1.

Silver munitions fired while offering prayer is the only known method of killing SCP-1983-2. The precise form of the prayer or religion of the supplicant does not appear to matter, so long as the prayer is sincere. Once killed, the bodies of SCP-1983-2 appear to "disintegrate," leaving a small layer of sulfur.

SCP-1983 was discovered after a series of mysterious deaths in the vicinity of ███████ County. Foundation investigators encountered instances of SCP-1983-2 and were able to trace them back to SCP-1983-1.

Addendum 1: A team from MTF Chi-13 was sent through the front doorway to attempt to investigate the anomaly. They did not return. However, shortly after they entered, the front door appeared, closing in the frame. No further manifestations of SCP-1983-2 appeared.

Addendum 2: A second assault team entered SCP-1983-1 to determine the fate of the first assault team. They did not return. The door did not close. Shortly after new manifestations of SCP-1983-2 appeared, Agent Morris entered the doorway, which closed shortly after.

Addendum 3: On May 23, 1989, D-14134 was given a closed circuit camera tethered to a monitor by a 25-meter cord. He was instructed to examine as much of the area as he could, and then attempt to return. Once through the doorway, feed from the camera was interrupted. The cord was pulled taut, and then snapped.

Several hours afterward, the anomaly in SCP-1983-1 disappeared. Inside, the desiccated remains of several agents were discovered, as well as Document 1983-15, an informal SCP report written by an agent within the anomaly. It appears as follows:

Item #: Pending

Object Class: Keter. God help you.

Special Containment Procedures: You're going to die, you poor dumb fuck.

This isn't a threat. I'm Agent Barclay. I'm in the middle of this goddamned thing, and I'm telling you, if you're here? You're going to die. I'm probably already dead.

So that's out of the way. Let's get to the containment procedures. There's really only one. Close the goddamned door. You aren't going to get back through there. You've probably already tried. But we know they can get out, if they try hard enough. That's how we found this fucking place. Hopefully, you've already done that. I know we did, once we gave up on getting out through there. If you didn't, then you go straight back and get that door closed. That is your only priority right now. You're going to die anyway. Might as well do some good before you're gone.

Description: So, here's a story, tell me if you've heard it before. The Foundation gets reports of trouble in Bumfuck, USA. Cattle and wildlife are dying mysteriously. Some people turn up missing. When a body shows up, autopsy finds the heart missing. Not cut out, not torn out, just gone. Empty space in the middle of the chest.

They find some sort of pitch-black things floating around. Some brain at the Foundation has seen something like them before, figures out how to kill them. Silver bullets, and pray to God as you fire. Literally. For some reason, that makes it work. Doesn't matter which God, but you damn well better mean it.

I can't, anymore. Not after seeing the nest.

Anyway, Foundation figures out where it's all coming from. Some house in the middle of Bumfuck. No one's lived there in years, not since yadda yadda, murder, cult, rituals, bullshit. The main thing is, these things keep appearing out of the front door. A team goes in, and they never come back out. But then again, neither do the monsters. A sane person would say, Good enough, keep an eye on it, kill anything that moves. But this is the Foundation.

You're a tough agent from MTF-Whatever-the-fuck. Maybe Sequere Nos, maybe Choir Boys, like me. You go bust down the door and run inside, and that's it. You're fucked.

The living room was bad enough. That's where they got O'Brien. They reached in, and suddenly he keeled over, and one of them took off with his heart in its… claws, I guess?

They're less distinct here. You probably noticed that. They're like shadows. Stay away from the light. I know that sounds stupid, but think about it. In the light, shadows are stronger. They have edges. When it's dark, they're indistinct. They can hardly touch you, and they don't see very well. I think they see by your shadow. I don't know. I'm just pulling at straws here, I'll be honest.

You've probably tried going back out the door, but if you haven't, don't. It leads to some place even worse. There aren't any monsters, but… Jones went too far from the house, and I swear to God, he started to melt. Things started popping out of him, and… All you need to know is he didn't make it back. That's when we closed the door.

So, we started moving through the house. We kept to the light at first, before we wised up. Three of us gone that way. But we got a pretty good picture of our surroundings.

This place? It's big. It's not just the farmhouse. It's like… It's like they stole bits and pieces of a lot of places, and stuck them all together. There's some bits that look like an apartment, some that look like a shopping mall, and even what I swear is a closet from my old high school. Same patterns on the tiles and everything.

There's also bits that are made out of… stuff. It's black, like the shadow-things, and it's mostly in the well-lit places. If the lights go out, you can stick your hand through. I don't recommend it. That's how we lost Torres. Something grabbed him, pulled him through. The hole wasn't big enough for his head, but he still went through, eventually.

So, stay away from the light places, but watch your step when it's dark.

Of course, there's no way out. We figured that out too. Any door you find, it either just leads to another room in this nuthouse, or it leads out there, and it's pretty obvious we can't live there. So it's wait until you starve to death or one of those things gets you. Great bunch of choices, huh?

There's one thing you can do. I couldn't go through with it, but maybe you can. It won't help you live, I don't think, but it's… I think it's important. I'm pretty sure someone's going to have to, or these things are going to get out eventually.

This place is stolen from lots of places. So I'm thinking there have to be other doors. We've closed all the ones we've found, but what if they get opened again? And the Foundation doesn't find them in time? Hell, they don't even know about closing the doors. I'm just hoping they figure out that if someone goes in, the things might stop getting out. And that's assuming everyone's smart enough to close the door after they come in.

So, I think I figured out a way to stop these things. It's the nest.

I only saw it once, for a few minutes. We followed one of the bastards after they got Denning's heart. It took it into a room that I guess is in the middle of this whole place. It's all black stuff, and they've dragged in every kind of light they could find, I guess. Lamps, flashlights, candles, you name it. Some of them were carrying more in as we watched. Anyway, at the middle, there's a big pile of hearts. Just tossed in a heap, and torn open, every one. They threw Denning's heart on the pile, and it started to beat, and then pulse, and then thrash around. Then it tore open, and one of those things pulled itself out. It shook itself, started to grow and then went right to work. The gross thing is that, torn apart as they were, the hearts kept beating. I swear I felt a twinge in my own chest.

There were shadows in the place. I don't mean the monsters, I mean real shadows, of people. Only there was no one there to cast them. They were coming from the hearts. A new one appeared at the same time as the hatching monster, and started trying to pull away, but it couldn't.

That was when I ran. I couldn't take it, you understand? I wasn't trained for this kind of shit. I heard the others behind me. I don't know if they were trying to stop me, or if the bastards had spotted us, but we got separated. I found a nice, dark closet, and I've been hiding in here ever since. I've been writing by penlight. I turn it off whenever I hear one of them getting close. It's worked, so far.

I can't go any further. I've got a few shots left in my gun, but I can't pray anymore, not and mean it. Not after I saw the nest. But you, if you've found this, you've got to be an agent too. Maybe you're stronger than I was. If you can, go in and destroy the nest. Destroy every last heart. If you do, maybe it'll kill them. It's the only thing I can think of. You'll probably die doing it, but you're dead anyway. So what's it matter to you how it happens?

Me, I'm going to try and get this report back to the living room, which I hope is where you found it. Then I'm going to make sure they can't use my heart to make another one of those things.

Good luck. Morituri te salutant.

SCP-1983 is presumed to have been neutralized by D-14134, who was posthumously awarded the Foundation Star (one of only two awarded to Class-D Personnel). Due to information contained in Document 1983-15, it is believed that the anomaly was not localized, as previously believed, and renewed resources have gone into attempting to locate similar incidents.

===

[“Mr. Parker” is an SCP Tale by Erazm.]

[The voice of the agent was provided by @phinnsy.] [The voice of Agent Barclay was provided by @lapis-liberalis.]

===

[Enjoy the podcast? Consider supporting us on Patreon! Patrons get access to bonus Joke episodes, outtakes, and can even request episodes on specific SCP objects.]

[fearofaherobrine]

Roleplay Server Log #262

“Staff Meetings, Tantrum, Big Fire Punch”

[Notch] shouts for Cp and the force of his irritation rocks the foundations of Lie's house slightly-

[Lie] Stirs awake in the bed, CP had wandered off somewhere- The hell?

[Notch] Bangs urgently on her door-

[Lie] Grumpily she gets out of bed and wraps a blanket around herself before going to open the door- Notch?

[Notch] Is standing there holding his phone and shaking a little bit- Where is Cp?!

[Lie] - At the moment I don't know...  Why?

[Notch] Because I'm in a- a- conference call and I need him! It was bad enough he scared my old collegues half to death but he put one of them to sleep and now they can't wake him up!

[Lie] - Oh for fucks sake...  Hang on a sec, I'll see if I can't get him here...- She closes her eyes and sends out a mental tendril for her husband.  Within a moment he's there, slinking out of the shadows to wrap himself around her

[Notch] Cp.... Wake. Tokig. up.

[CP] - Who?

[Notch] Holds up the phone so the camera is on Cp. He can easily see the image of a conference room and several frightened faces. There's a heavyset man laying prone and still on the table-

[CP] - Oh yeah...  Him...  And I want to do this why?

[Lie] - CP I will extend the no sex indefinitely...

[CP] - Oh come on!  Why!?

[Notch] DO IT. You're fucking lucky they're still my friends, or you might have put the whole server in danger!

-Faint sound of Jeb being amused that Cp is getting yelled at-

[CP] Grumbles but does release a ripple of his power- Wake up

[Tokig] Wakes with a panicked gasp of air-

[CP] - Happy now?

[Lie] - You're sleeping on the couch

[Notch] Gritted teeth- Yeeeessss

[Lie] Looks at the others on the screen- I apologize for my husband, some of his old habits are still a bit...  Strong

[Fangbo] Are we in any danger?

[Lie] - No, not unless the SCP takes any interest in you

[CP] - Liiiiiiiiie

[Lie] - No

[CP] - Oh come on

[Lie] - If you keep acting like a cat then I will turn you into one

[Yster] I did kinda hit him with a clipboard and pepper spray....

[CP] - Eh, pepper spray only tingles a little

[Lie] - Of course it would for you...

[Jeb] Snickers at Cp a little bit-

[Notch] Good grief-

[CP] - I heard that

[Jeb] Little frightened gulp-

[CP] - Can we go to bed now?

[Lie] - Uh what is this we you're talking about?  I just told you you're on the couch tonight

[Drona] Markus... is there anything we can do for you?

[Notch] No... I'm stuck. But it beats being dead and it's usually really peaceful here.

[CP] - I mean, I could always take you back out so you can regain a physical form

[Notch] And be in horrible pain for several weeks... I'm not ready for that.

[CP] - It wouldn't be that long

[Jeb] So why did you want that super old server anyway?

[CP] Thumbs at Notch- His girlfriend

[Notch] Blushes- Giving it to her keeps her protected. I don't know what I'd do if she got deleted...

[Jeb] sudden suprise - That was her server?!

[Lie] - Also CP's original

[Fangbo] You're dating a server?

[Jeb] That means that his NOTCH.... wow.... one of the first ones...

[Notch] Yeah...

[Fangbo] Excuse me, I think we're glossing over the fact that he's dating an AI...

[Tokig] Who's doing what now?!

[Fangbo] Markus is dating an AI.

[Tokig] Oh.... is she hot?

[Notch] Flustered - Yes and in addition; shut up.

[Lie] - She's also very powerful, an embodiment of magic

[Yster] Like occult stuff? Or she can mess with the software and make the physics fail and whatnot?

[CP] - That would be more Deer, Flux's magic is more raw, like what allows crafting to work

[Jeb] Basically making his collegue look bad- She's also hot. And often randomly naked.  

[Tokig] Niiiiice.

[Drona] Eye roll-

[Lie] - Deer is another server

[Fangbo] I feel like I'm going insane...

[Notch] I can imagine. I'm sorry to drag you all into this. But you need to understand the gravity of the situation. It's so important that this is kept secret. We actually know someone who can wipe memories, but you're still my friends and I don't want to do that to you.

[Yster] Thank you then.

[CP] - Plus Slender may actually try to eat them

[Tokig] SLENDER?!

[Drona] Okay, now you have to be messing with us!

[CP] - Why do you think I'm referred to as CP?

[Jeb] Because you're a serial cock puncher?

[Fangbo] Can't help but laugh-

[Notch] He's got you there...

[CP] Growls-

[Lie] - It's because he's a creepy pasta

[Tokig] Scootches off the table and goes underneath it instead-

[Lie] - Mind you he's gotten much better since coming here

[Jeb] He's still assaulted me several times...

[Lie] - Yeah there's still a ways to go

[Notch] We're working on it. He's still a stubborn Herobrine.

[Drona] Markus? If we code things for you, can you install mods?

[Notch] No. But I can go to other seeds and bring items in.

[Lie] - What do you have in mind?

[Drona] I'm not sure. It was just a thought. Do you need anything?

[Lie] Not off the top of my head...- She leans back into CP for the warmth

[CP] - How about something to counteract my NOTCH's fucking sword?

[Jeb] I thought your NOTCH was dead?

[CP] - The...- Turns his head away a little- The original one is...

[Notch] He means Harvestman Jeb... the bastard has a sword that deletes things.

[Yster] Harvestman is after you guys?! Are you the ones that fucked him up?

[CP] - I wish...

[Lie] Shudders a little-

[Jeb] He hasn't encountered another NOTCH or brine for at least two weeks, but he's acting like he's fresh from battle when the system checks on him. I caught a glimpse of him a few days ago while he was crossing an empty series of test seeds, he was limping and coughing up blood.

[Notch] He was what?!

[Lie] - Probably Dawns doing...

[CP] - Fucker

[Notch] Anything helps... I didn't know you could curse an AI that effectively.

[Lie] There's a soft glow barely visible under the blanket wrapped around Lie as she tries to calm CP down-

[Fangbo] Who's Dawn?

[Notch] She's a witch. Irl. And thankfully a friend of ours. Not someone you want to allienate.

[CP] - Is there a reason you're still standing in our doorway?

[Notch] Yes. I'm going to walk you to the couch and then finish my call.

[CP] - I do not need you to walk me!?

[Notch] Is already moving. - Lie?

[Lie] - Take him, the couch is down in his private chambers

[Notch] Takes Cp's arm in his free hand and tugs on him-

[CP] - Fucker let go!

[Lie] Waves at her husband before heading back to the bedroom- Your son might be grumpy about going to bed!

[Lie] Is at the bar the next day around noon, she's enjoying a rather nice chat with Sam-

[Doc] Opens the door and holds it so Yaunfen can trot in first.

[Yaunfen] Walks in in human form- Food!  Food!

[Sam] Waves merrily, spreading his hands to indicate they should ask for something.

[Lie] Yawns, still tired from the previous night-

[Doc] Done at the library and now it's time for lunch huh?

[Yaunfen] - Uh-huh!  And then more library!

[Doc] Don't you think we got enough? You should read what you have and then we'll get more. - Makes a circular gesture and Sam nods before heading back to the kitchen.

[Yaunfen] - But...  But...  Books!

[Doc] I know. Books are awesome. I'm proud of you for wanting to learn.

[Lie] - Hey Doc.

[Doc] Hey Lie. I take it you didn't sleep too well?

[Lie] - Not exactly...  Notch woke me up in the middle of the night

[Doc] That's weirdly rude for him.

[Sam] Comes back with a bacon pizza for Doc and a very large flat cookie covered with icing and sprinkles for Yaunfen

[Lie] - That's because CP did a little more than just get Flux's server when he went out

[Yaunfen] Takes the cookie- Thank you

[Doc] I saw him come and go on the chat in the morning. - Takes a slice and gestures for her to take some if she wants. - Thank you Sam.

[Lie] - He ran into some of Notch's former employees and put one of them to sleep- Accepts the offer

[Doc] Groans- Does he have to fucking.... Ugh! Do I need to do any damage control? Bribe anyone?

[Lie] - I don't think so, I think between CP terrorizing them, Notch, and Jeb they might have it.  Honestly Notch's employees seemed more concerned about him

[Doc] I'm glad they still care about him. I think he was hard done by, getting pushed out like that. - nomming-

[Lie] Lets out a little laugh- Notch actually dragged CP down to his private chambers last night to make certain he was sleeping on the couch like I requested, he was that mad

[Doc] Wow.... He's gonna put me to shame with this dad thing. But I guess it's nice to not be alone in curbing his less pleasant tendancies.

[Lie] - I may have also griefed him just a tiny bit...

[eddy and Edward] -run into the bar Edward clearly pretending to chase eddy with snake holding onto Edward-

[Doc] YOU? What did you do Lie?! Oh hey kids! What's up?

[Lie] - I may have mentioned just loudly enough while Notch was leaving with CP, for the others to hear, that CP is his son...

[eddy and Edward] -wave before climbing on to one of the bar stools-

[Doc] Pats Lie on the shoulder - Considering all the times he's embarassed you...? That's more then fair.

[Sam] Looks over the bar at the little visitors motioning for them to order if they want.

[Lie] - It did feel a little good...

[Yaunfen] Has gotten cookie crumbs everywhere-

[Doc] Snickers- I take it Cp is sulking? Likely in a tree someplace? Having fun there kiddo?

[Lie] - And avoiding Notch, if it hadn't been so late Notch may have berated him a bit more

[Yaunfen] Nods- We go back to books?

[Doc] Not gonna let me eat first? - still nomming

[Yaunfen] - BOOKS!

[Sam] Has a sudden thought and pulls out a bowl of dragonwort-

[Doc] Gives Sam an eyebrow- That's an odd thought, but it might work.

[snake] -is curled up on Edwards head-

[Doc] Do you guys want to try the plant Lie made for the dragons? It's nice and dry and the leaves are sweet and soft.

[eddy and Edward] -tries some of the dragon wart and they like it and start noming on it-

[Doc] Want a little pepper or something? It's so weird to think of eating everything dry.

[Lie] Yawns again-

[Edward] -shakes his head-

[Doc] So how long is he in the cat house for this time?

[Lie] - Don't know yet

[Yaunfen] Tugs on Doc's coattails-

[Doc] Yes?

[Yaunfen] - More books?

[Doc] I can't, your inventory is full remember? You should have emptied it before you left the house. [Each book takes up one slot]

[Yaunfen] Whines- But I want more!

[Doc] Pats them on the head - I know. Sometimes you have to do things in moderation though. Besides, the library is for sharing. You can't hog everything.

[Yaunfen] Puffs cheeks out in irritation and stomps a little- But I want!

[Doc] Now, now, don't be like that. It makes you sound like Cp!

[Yaunfen] Suddenly flops to the floor and starts banging their fists and kicking their feet- I WANT! I WANT! I WANT! I WANT!

[Doc] Side eyes Lie- Ummm... Yaunfen...? Don't do that please. Are you over-stimulated?

[Yaunfen] As they let out a scream the floor begins to shake with each hit-

[Lie] - Sometimes they just have to get it out of their system

[Doc] Whoah! Yaunfen?! Stop that! You're going to shake the bar down!

[Sam] Looks panicked [since it is daylight outside.]

[Lie] Sighs and approaches Yaunfen- That's enough Yaunfen, naughty dragons don't get to take any books home

[Yaunfen] - But...  But...

[Lie] - No buts

[snake] -fall on to the floor-

[eddy and Edward] -starts making panicked ender sounds-

[Doc] Is still marvelling that they managed to shake the build around them - Yaunfen...

[Yaunfen] Just lays on the floor crying now-

[Lie] - I think somebody may need a nap...

[Doc] Sits down on the floor and gathers them into hir lap - It's okay.  Nobody is mad at you. You just got over-exicited. Lets just slow down a little.

[Yaunfen] Sniffles and rubs eyes-

[Doc] Kisses them on the forehead- That was some pretty hard hitting you were doing.

[Yaunfen] - But books...

[Lie] - The books will still be there Yaunfen

[Doc] I think you're going to help me harvest sugarcanes. Then we can make even more raw books that I can fill up for you.

[Yaunfen] Tiny voice- Okay...

[Doc] Smooths Yaunfen's long locks - Feeling a little better?

[Yaunfen] Nods a little-

[Doc] Gives them a hug- And I think we might be on to something too. Wait... - gets a naughty smile- Maybe we should talk to Cp for a bit-

[Lie] Gives Doc a questioning look-

[Doc] Carries Yaunfen outside. [They can still pick up their child when Yaunfen is in hir humanoid form] They shift to their own dragon form so the little one can lay between the doctors shoulder spirals. - I'll walk slow. You nap. - and they set off at a snails pace towards Lie's house. Counting on the rocking motion to soothe the small dragon.

[Yaunfen] Yawns and does fall asleep-

[CP] Is up in his pouting tree-

[Doc] Curls up around the base of the tree. Xe's okay with just waiting to be noticed since Yaunfen is napping.

[Doc] Gives a soft little yawn of hir own. Just full of food and warm in the sunshine.

[CP] - The fuck do you want?

[Doc] Not so loud. I just wanted to pick your brain a little. You are the resident baby dragon expert.

[CP] - What is it?

[Doc] Yaunfen had a little outburst and managed to punch and kick the bar floor hard enough to shake the building.

[CP] - ... Okay?

[Doc] You have more experience teaching people to use emerging powers then I do. I think it's an interesting development.

[CP] - Probably one of its powers

[Doc] I hope so. They need something to defend with. -Xe gives Yaunfen a gentle nuzzle with hir nose. - poor child can't even fly. It seems rather unfair.

[CP] - Anything else?

[Doc] I don't know...

[CP] - Then fuck off, I don't want Notch to know where I am

[Doc] it's not like he's vindictive. He already yelled at you once.

[CP] - He used the dad voice

[Doc] Does that really bother you?

[CP] - It's a bit unsettling, voices should not be able to do that... Unless your from Skyrim

[Doc] ... Cp... He's just worried. Wait... You're not... Does it scare you when he does that?

[CP] - NnnnnnnnYes!- Clamps hand over mouth

[Doc] Oh, Cp, you know he cares about you. Even when you're being bad, I don't think he'd hurt you on purpose.

[CP] - Shut up! I didn't mean to say that!

[Doc] It's okay to feel vulnerable around your loved ones, and it's okay to trust people too. Heck, Deerheart could smash me if she really wanted too. But I know she loves me, so I don't worry about it.

[CP] Huffs and grumbles- It's not like he hasn't been more of a father figure than the other two...

[Doc] He really wants the job, so he's doing his best.

[CP] Groans- Well congrats, he's better than the other two- Realizes what he said and curses under his breath

[Doc] Smiles- I'll let him know. It's seems like you've had a productive meditation up there today. Planning on apologizing to Lie when she comes home?

[CP] - No, she hit me with honesty pollen

[Doc] Oh! I was wondering. No wonder you wanted me to go away. I know how much it kills you to be nice to me.

[CP] Growls-

[Doc] Steps up the air blocks in a spiral around the tree until Xe's level with Cp and smiles softly - love you brother brine.

[CP] - Fuck off!  And you will not repeat what I just said!

[Doc] Okay then, I think he already knows... Now it's just a matter of reconnecting with your beleaguered brother.

[CP] Glares-

[Doc] teeny tiny smile-

[CP] - Go away Doc, you're making it obvious where I am

[Doc] We could go somewhere else?

[CP] - How about you just go away instead

[Doc] Come on Cp, come play with us. We're gonna make a mess. - Xe gently grabs him with a paw and puts him on hir mane- it'll take your mind off things

[CP] - No

[Doc] pfft. You're just sulking anyway. And Markus won't know where you are if you come with us. - trots across the air heading for the desert-

[CP] - I will stab you, you fucker

[Doc] Shhh, you'll wake the baby- Xe lands in the sand and heads around the side of the shrine towards the signaling tower.

[CP] - Why are we here?

[Doc] it's a good place to punch things- Xe lets him down and shifts under Yaunfen so they end up in hir arms-

[CP] Just floats in the air-

[Doc] Bumps open the door - come on-

[CP] - No

[Doc] Please?

[CP] Glares-

[Doc] Nudges Yaunfen- sweetie? We're home.

[Yaunfen] Sleepy mumbles as they curl in closer to Doc- Mada...

[Doc] Cuddles them - Wake up little one.

[Yaunfen] Eyes open- Mada?

[Doc] Yep. Come on, I need you to walk a little since Cp won't come in without being pushed.

[Yaunfen] - Okay...  Down please

[Doc] Lets them down gently with a pat on the head-

[Yaunfen] Smiles and then watches Doc walk back towards CP-

[Doc] Gets a sly look and rushes Cp, changing and dipping underground before reaching him-

[CP] tries to dart upwards and away-

[Doc] Arches gracefully up behind him and uses hir snout to shove him bodily through the open door and down the stairs before stopping him at the bottom by grabbing his belt

[CP] - FUCKER!

[Yaunfen] Giggles- Again!  Again!

[Doc] Goes past him, slipping in and out of the walls like a ghost - Well this is as far as I was going to go-

[Buff] Pokes his head out a room that's set alongside the stairs- What's all the ruckus?

[Doc] Shifts back and drops onto the floor with a clack of boots. - Just a bit of fun.

[CP] - Refuses to move any farther as Yaunfen slips past and hurries to Doc-

[Doc] We were gonna hit the little gym for a bit-

[Buff] That sounds like a great idea!

[Doc] Cp is just being stubborn as usual-

[Buff] Big grin- Is he now?

[CP] - Fuck off!

[Buff] Goes eye to eye with Cp - Maybe he just needs a big hug?

[CP] Darts backwards with a growl- No!

[Buff] Aww come on Cp. We could box! - Hops around a bit holding his fists up playfully-

[CP] Growls and flexes his fingers a little, considering summoning his sword-

[Doc] Play nice guys. - Xe takes Cp's shirttail and awkwardly tugs him sideways into the little gym.

[CP] Still growling-

[Doc] Now. Cp I have a request you'll like. Please teach Yaunfen how to throw a proper punch. And use the bag. Not me!

[Buff] Good save. Hehe

[CP] - Why?

[Doc] Because. I want to see if they can replicate what happened in the bar by focusing.

[CP] - And if I don't want to?

[Doc] You're passing up a chance to both teach and punch things?

[Buff] Gives Yaunfen a pat - They're silly aren't they?

[CP] - Teaching a child...  When my wife is already mad at me...  To fight

[Doc] You taught Stevie how to use a sword...

[CP] - That was different

[Doc] Expectant stare-

[Yaunfen] - Is big fire sick?  Mada says big fire likes fighting...

[CP] - It's true!

[Buff] I think he's just holding off to annoy your mada.

[Doc] Yeah it's different in that swords are more dangerous.

[CP] - And it was necessary, Stevie and I were the only ones there, I had to teach him in case something did happen

[Doc] And you think my child shouldn't at least know the most basic move for protecting oneself? Even the weakest Steve can punch a tree down.

[CP] - Then teach them yourself, unless you don't know how

[Yaunfen] - But your big fire...  You're strongest...

[CP] Growls a little-

[Doc] You're going to disappoint under that banner Cp?

[CP] Glares- Fine.  Show me what you can do kid

[Yaunfen] Trots over to the punching bag...  Only to start crying as they are splattered with blood- Mada!

[Doc] Hey I said we were going to make a mess! I've seen you gleefully get paint everywhere kiddo.

[Yaunfen] Cries a little- This is icky and smells bad!

[CP] Laughs a little-

[Doc] Okay. I'll turn the drip coding off. - Xe runs hir hands over Yaunfen and flicks all the bloody pixels onto the floor.

[Buff] Gives Cp a pointed look for laughing.

[Yaunfen] - No more icky?

[Doc] No more icky. Cp likes that kind of thing though. The amount of splatter shows how hard you're hitting too. - Xe fiddles with a bag a bit and slaps a button on the ceiling above it. the Doctor pokes the button with a stick and the bag goes suddenly dry.

[CP] - Try again kid

[Yaunfen] Doesn't look sure but does try again, this time when they punch there is no splatter-

[CP] Watches and approaches, beginning to correct things-

[Buff] Slides over and picks up the big dumbell, lifting it up and down in one hand and then the other.

[Doc] Watches proudly-

[Yaunfen] Keeps attacking the bag with small corrections from CP-

[Doc] Try and replicate what you did before. You were really hitting the floor with some crazy strength.

[Yaunfen] - I don't know...

[Buff] Oh, are they showing some powers Doc?

[Doc] Perhaps. Try focusing on something that fires you up. Imagine the bag is someone mean you don't like.

[Yaunfen] Frowns and tries hitting again, thinking about DN.  There are several small punches, but the last one sends the bag swinging wildly with a bit of power-

[Buff] Whoah!

[Doc] There we go! That had some serious weight behind it!

[CP] Steps back, wondering if he can slink away-

[Yaunfen] - I did it!  I did it!

[Doc] You did! I'm so proud of you! - Subtly blocks Cp from going out the door- Thoughts Cp?

[CP] - They've got the basics down, don't know what to think of their power

[Doc] I'm just imagining what that would be like in a donkey kick instead of a punch...

[CP] - I think that's more your area to teach

[Doc] On the contrary, it might be Lie's area. I'm too long in the tail to do good donkey kicks.

[CP] - How would it be her area?

[Doc] Duh. She trains horses. I heard about her impromptu lesson with Steve and China. And Yaunfen is horse-sized now.

[CP] - No

[Doc] No what? I can call her. Tell her how helpful you're being and ask for her assistance.

[CP] - Just fuck off and let me leave

[Doc] You don't want to be around for me praising you in front of her?

[CP] Flips Doc off as he shoves past them-

[Buff] Thanks Cp!

[Doc] Chuckles- Hey Yaunfen? Want to have auntie Lie teach you something next?

[Yaunfen] - Yeah!

[Doc] We should probably go outside though. It's too close in here and the quartz floor of the shrine is too slippery. - types- Hey Lie? Are you busy?

[Lie] - Still eating, why?

[Doc] Are you still at the bar?

[Lie] - Yeah

[Doc] Okay. I'll come to you. Hey Yaunfen, in the mood for a faster ride this time?

[Yaunfen] Nods eagerly-

[Buff] Puts a towel around his neck. - Mind if I come?

[Doc] Goes to say yes and shakes hir head as he gets close - UGH! Take a dip first. Please and thank you.

[Yaunfen] Sneezes a little-

[Buff] Heh! Sure. - He jumps into the pool at the back of the room and does a quick scrub before coming back out.

[Doc] That's better. You were a bit ripe. - Xe walks the two of them outside and shifts quickly, scooping them up and shooting crazily into the sky. Xe makes a point to zoom closely past Cp walking home and do a tight barrel roll overhead-