#this would be a lot of character study and a chance for me to infodump about my denomination lmao

[hardly-an-escape]

starting to think about how I could make Episcopal priest!Tommy work and then I saw this post about a Buckley parent dying...

what if? one of the Buckley parents passes away. Buck and Maddie travel back to Hershey to help plan/attend the funeral and support their remaining parent. the Buckleys are canonically Episcopalians, so obviously that's where the service takes place. their longtime rector at St. Whatever has recently retired, but comes back to preside over the service. (okay I actually looked it up and the church in Hershey is called All Saints which is... kind of the most basic Episcopal church name you could have lmao.)

in the meantime the church has a new interim rector, Fr. Thomas Kinard. he respectfully takes a backseat to his predecessor, but is very present and supportive throughout the process, especially for Buck and Maddie, who don't have as much of a connection to the former priest. (a little background: typically after a priest retires they're encouraged to disconnect from their former church for a time, but for personal services like weddings and funerals, families can often request that a particular beloved pastor perform the service.) maybe the older priest is a little scatterbrained or just kind of checked out, and Tommy does some of the heavy lifting in terms of planning and organization.

I love the idea of Tommy as a professional interim (which is totally a thing). spending a year here and two years there, helping parishes through tricky transitions; unmarried, never settling in one place for long. kind of a pro at being 'all things to all people,' but secretly longing for his place, a home to call his own. maybe he worked in LA for a time and is familiar with the west coast. maybe he came to the priesthood later in life after his own career as a first responder, and he and Buck can bond over that. maybe he started out as an Army chaplain in a more conservative denomination, and found the Episcopal church when he started to accept himself as a gay man.

anyway. the Buckley family are grieving, distracted. death and funerals are always hard, but when it's a parent – a parent with whom you had a very complicated relationship, no less – it's even harder. Tommy gets it. he had a complicated relationship with his parents, too. and even in the midst of this grief, this pain, Buck can feel this weird connection to Tommy. it doesn't even occur to him to correct Tommy when he calls him Evan (because that's how he was listed in the bulletin or the church directory or whatever) (but Tommy notices that everyone else calls him Buck and self-corrects). and he thinks it's just their shared firefighting background, or bonding over grief, or something; but all through that weird, long week in Hershey, his eye just keeps getting drawn back to Tommy.

and then – it's all over. Buck and Maddie head back to their lives in LA. maybe Tommy gives them his card, tells Buck to call if he ever needs to talk. and part of Buck really wants to, but... he just can't find an excuse. he's not particularly religious, so it would feel disingenuous to call Tommy just to ask about the church. he doesn't really need a counselor or a priest. what he needs is a friend, what he wants is something more, but he doesn't realize it.

in the meantime, the church in Hershey calls a new permanent rector, and Tommy decides to look for a new call in Los Angeles for no particular reason at all. he finds himself drawn back into the world of firefighting – maybe he realizes that there's a real need for spiritual guidance among the first responders of LA, and he understands their challenges better than most ministers can. maybe in this universe he and Hen and Chim still worked together at the 118 before he left for seminary, and they reconnect.

I think Buck and Tommy meet again at a scene. maybe Tommy is the one who calls the fire in, or maybe he's the Good Samaritan who just jumps in and starts helping people. their eyes meet and there's this crazy spark. Buck thinks it's just adrenalin, but Tommy knows better.

"you never called me," Tommy says.

"yeah, I – I didn't know how. I mean. you wanted me to?" Buck asks.

"yes. I did," Tommy says, sounding a little surprised at himself. "I, uh. I really did."

"wow. uh. then I can. I mean, I will. I mean, we're talking now," Buck stammers. "uh, Father Thomas, I –"

"you should call me Tommy, Buck," Tommy says gently.

"o-okay. in that case," Buck takes a deep breath. it tastes like soot and hope. "you should call me Evan."

[anistarrose]

20 questions for fic writers, tagged by @holdmecloser-gandydancer (thanks reese!) tagging @fexalted @3hobbitsinatrenchcoat @novantinuum and anyone else who wants to!

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

86, very soon to be 87!

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

397,102. my god.

3. What fandoms do you write for?

The majority (over half) of my total fics on AO3 are Gravity Falls, but my current passion right now is obviously TAZ Balance, which is a pretty close runner-up. TOH is a lot further behind, but I have at least one WIP I want to finish up early next year!

4. What are your top five fics by kudos?

Some Sunny Day (Gravity Falls), Tulip's Return (Infinity Train), Stan and Ford Vs. The Future (GF), Fateful Detours (GF/IT crossover), Missteps and Miscommunication (GF).

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Usually, and especially when they give me a chance to infodump about the writing process! I just don't necessarily respond quickly lol

6. What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

In recent memory, it might be but the strange lights in the sky were shining (TAZ). I write more happy/bittersweet endings than sad ones, but that one... that one has one of my absolute favorite twists :)

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

to eat from a poisoned plate (TAZ) is one that I almost didn't write a happy ending for, but I'm so glad that I did, because I go back and reread that one a lot, admittedly.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Usually no more than annoying but generic "please update" comments, but back in the Gravity Falls fandom, there was this one person that you've probably heard of/encountered if you wrote a lot about Bill Cipher back in the day.

They were a guest account user who'd get so mad if you killed off Bill, to the point of making threats (albeit exaggerated, not really realistic ones), and also one time they told me I should go read a particular MLP fic and take inspiration from it in my own. Which, no shade against MLP, but as someone who's never been in that fandom, that's literally the funniest entitled comment I've received in my life.

9. Do you write smut?

Nope, but I do occasionally write characters being horny. There's a huge difference between those things for me, and that probably has everything to do with where I lie on the ace spectrum lmao

10. Do you write crossovers?

A couple times, though I used to be way more into them than I am now. There was the aforementioned GF/Infinity Train one, and my gateway into writing TAZ fic was actually a very silly "what if the Pines family were the protags of TAZ Balance" fic.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not to my knowledge, and fingers crossed it doesn't happen 🤞

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Yes, a few times! My buddy @yourbonesarenowmycoat translated several of my Gravity Falls fics into Spanish back in the day, for one thing!

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Nope!

14. What's your all-time favourite ship?

This should come as no surprise but it's Blupjeans forever and ever <3

15. What's the WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

Oh, god. Probably the one that I wrote like 9 chapters (out of 10 planned ones) to cope with being chronically ill and to convince myself to go to therapy, and then abruptly stopped writing when it was almost done because I figured out how to manage my chronic illness and soon after, started going to therapy. On the one hand, it would be tragic for it to never see the light of day, but on the other hand, it kinda... served its purpose for me already?

16. What are your writing strengths?

Fic as character study! Sometimes I set out with the goal of elucidating a particular theme or character motivation, and sometimes it just happens along the way, but I am a genius with regards to character analysis and my brain is galaxy and I'm not afraid to share it.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Dialogue is one thing for sure, I get a lot of compliments on it but it's also such a challenge for me. Possibly because I, personally, don't talk like a remotely normal human person irl. The other thing is brevity and killing my darlings — I literally can't count the number of times one of my fics exceeded the expected word count by orders of magnitude.

The aforementioned character study thing? Yeah, that's also a weakness, because a lot of my fics (even including some very, very long ones!) exist to explore themes I couldn't figure out how to word in a simple headcanon post. In fact, I'm probably gonna post a fic of that exact variety this weekend, lmao.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

Definitely not fluent enough in any language to do it on any larger scale, unless I get serious about learning Spanish again.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Not on AO3, but in general, it was definitely Pokémon! I was writing time travel stories set in Sinnoh before Legends Arceus made it cool.

20. Favourite fic you've ever written?

As previously mentioned... probably "to eat from a poisoned plate". In the vaguest possible terms, learning to love cooking again in spite of some prior bad experiences has been a struggle for me, too, and I truly think that without having written that fic, I wouldn't be succeeding.

On a related note, I'm about to spend my afternoon making a blueberry pie.

[shadowsong26fic]

Coming Attractions!

Yes, I know it’s Wednesday, not Monday, but shhhhhh.

(In my defense, there’s been A Lot of IRL stuff the past couple days so. Anyway.)

As always, this is just a general overview of what I did last month and what I Hope to do next month; also an Open Question Night. Any asks about fandoms I’ve posted about here or on Ao3, or writing stuff in general is fair game. I do also accept prompts, but I make no promises on how quickly I fill them (there’s one currently sitting in my inbox that I’m hoping to get to later tonight, lol).

Anyway, here goes!

Star Wars:

I ended up dropping out of SWBB as a writer this year--just couldn’t get things to come together right--but I’m participating as an artist/podficcer! The story I’m recording is SWTOR-based, which is an area of fandom/canon that I have very little knowledge of, so it’s been a lot of fun working with my writer and getting to know a little more about that part (though it is apparently Very AU so.) I’m posting the podfic chapters as the writing chapters are posted, and you can find it here:

Writing: https://archiveofourown.org/works/47347087/ Podfic: https://archiveofourown.org/works/47517721/

I have also been keeping up with my OTP meme fills for Obianidala. The one I put out this month was fun; it was a chance to go back to the Heralds of Valdemar crossover/fusion which I haven’t played with in ages. I haven’t even looked at this months prompts yet, lol, I should probably do that...

(Precipice!verse is still also extant in my head but I have done no active work on it lately unfortunately and am not sure when I’ll get back to it but, as I’ve mentioned, it’s too big a part of my life in this fandom for me to abandon. Until and unless I entirely leave the SW fandom, Precipice will be there.)

BSG:

Again with the OTP meme stuff; this month’s fill came together sort of last minute. I wasn’t totally sure what I wanted to do? I thought about something related to them eventually having kids on Earth (one of the available prompts was ‘pet/child acquisition’; also thought about something super self-indulgent involving Atia, but I think what I ended up writing turned out really well, so I’m happy.

Of course the Big news is that Galactica Big Bang officially opens in less than a month! I need to finish actually, like, Making the sign-up forms, haha. But I’m really excited for the event. I’m not sure if I’m going to be a participant as well as running it (podficcing is less intimidating than I thought it would be, based on my current SWBB experience, and I think especially if it’s something I already come to with some investment it’ll be nice? Also I do have BB-scale storyline ideas, lol. Not just the Massive Epics like TOB or continuing in the Backup Plans AU...right now the sort of top choices, if I do write, are going back to the Selkie AU or doing a Zarek character study? But we’ll see.

Other Fandom Stuff:

As you may have noticed, based on some things I’ve posted in the last couple weeks, I’ve gone down a very specific Les Mis rabbit hole XD I have two longfic projects being worked on; one I’m actually hoping to start posting later this week (I want to get at least three chapters prewritten, plus I think I want a second pair of eyes on chapter 2 just to make sure it’s not too Infodumpy, so. If anyone’s interested, lol. (on the other hand would it really be a victor hugo pastiche without at least one random infodump? lol)

The other one I haven’t started actually writing yet, but I have something of an outline for it (it’s a Groundhog Day AU which includes a few different endings out of Spite and/or Loving Mockery of other adaptations; along with a few others I just want to do). This one will have some very heavy TWs that should absolutely be taken seriously (Javert is the one looping the last like 36 hours of his life, you do the math). Anyway, once I get started on writing that, I’m hoping it’ll go pretty quickly.

I am signing up for pod_together again! As always, signing up to get assigned a podficcer; I think signups close the end of this week so I think I should be matched by Monday? This will be my third time doing the event. I’ve actually done crossovers both of the prior times? But I’m pretty proud of both pieces I put out, and it was a lot of fun to work on. We’ll see how it goes!

I think I mentioned last month that some of my AtLA plots may have resurfaced? So far not enough for me to actively work on them, but we’ll see. I did list that (as well as my other usual suspects of SW and BSG; plus Les Mis because the current brainrot is Strong and a couple others) as a primary/first-choice fandom for matching for pod_together, so that might produce something. Again, we’ll see.

Original Stuff:

Mostly OTP meme again, though a couple other things for Rainbowfic challenges have come out as well. Not really much to report here, although I am producing a lot more than I have in recent years, which is good, I’m pleased with myself on that.

...I think that’s everything? So, yeah! Open Question Night, as I mentioned above, let me know what’s on your mind! Or what you guys are working on/excited for!

[feralaot]

AOT characters and their interests/hobbies 💞

been thinking about these a lot and wanted to share :]

no warnings

eren

collects vintage electronic things like gameboy cartridges, ataris, old nintendos, etc. I feel like he would also collect caps from energy drink cans, not for any particular reason, he just thinks they look neat

mikasa

I've mentioned this before but I'll die on the hill that she loves embroidery and sewing and makes things like scarves, hats, and gloves to donate

armin

has no shame whatsoever about being super into flowers and gardening. also likes rambling about marine biology, he was always fascinated by the sea and y'all already KNOW he'd geek about the stuff that's actually in it

connie

really likes insects! he has had several bug collections and some of his favorite decorations are framed bugs. tried to get into pc building at some point but couldnt really figure it out

jean

old music, old movies, vinyl records, etc. has several guitars both acoustic and electric and only knows a few songs on each but he just really likes collecting things and is a bit of an artist so he has sketchbooks laying everywhere. the first song he learned on electric guitar was seven nation army and he got really good at it so he played it repeatedly for weeks until connie begged him to play something else

sasha

y'all mfs already know this girl would love cooking. I also think she would really enjoy being an archery instructor and learning about various hunting methods in her spare time. she has always wanted to try catfish noodling but connie is her impulse control to not do so

historia

literally so good at makeup. doesn't even do it on herself most of the time because she likes putting it on other people. considering how tiny she is she tends to insist on sitting in someone's lap to do their makeup and y'all already know ymir is a volunteer. other than this she's also super "green" and infodumps about environmental sustainability to whoever will listen. once again, ymir

ymir

linguistics. my friend said that ymir would really enjoy studying and learning languages and honestly, hard agree. she would familiarize herself with the dialects of a language and also learn about ancient languages as well

hange

absolutely enthralled by animal biology and the way things work. takes every chance they can get to dissect something. has a collection of various animal skulls and always feels the need to tell people that no, they did not kill them themself, even though nobody asked

levi

this man would be so good at interior design. everything has a perfect aesthetic, is symmetrical, neat, has good palettes, the right furniture, everything. he'd totally talk shit about what you've done with the place

erwin

I cant explain it but he has the vibe of someone who'd be really into mythology and anatomical painting. would also probably taste test wine. a very sophisticated kind of man

reiner

once again I will die on the hill that he doesnt play sports himself but he probably really likes watching ice hockey. only bert knows this but he's also pretty good at carpentry and has built several shelves by himself that he was really proud of. a very hands-on kind of person

bertholdt

bird nerd. bird nerd. he loves birds and always feeds them. is also quite the artist and has lots of little scribbles all over his belongings. likes writing too but hasn't told anyone he writes except reiner

annie

she thought it was dumb at first but armin got her really into gardening and now they manage a garden together. he tends to the flowers and she tends to the vegetables. she also enjoys painting nature scenery, so there's a nice painting of their flower and vegetable gardens hanging up

porco and pieck

putting them together because they're pretty much the same. they both love watching unsolved true crime documentaries/videos together then infodumping to each other about their own theories. porco also really likes history and rambles about it to her whenever it comes up e.g. pointing out historical inaccuracies in films. also porco does yoga don't @ me

zeke

anthropology. I refuse to elaborate but just know I'm right. he goes to anthropology museums and absolutely geeks about everything

yelena

religious studies. need I say more

niccolo

yes he absolutely is into cooking but consider: he's also an absolute champ at pottery. he makes his own pots and jars and little mugs. in fact a lot of the indoor plants armin and annie have live in pots that niccolo made especially for them

[eldrai]

Pretty Boy

Whumptober 2021 - day 5 - prompt: misunderstanding

Characters: Reid & Morgan

Warnings: implied/referenced ableism, implied/referenced homophobia, past bullying, light implied CSA [none of it from them]

Words: 995

Summary: He's a nice kid. So Derek isn't sure why Reid is avoiding him.

masterlist / ao3

Spencer Reid has the awkwardness of a baby deer just learning how to use its legs, and a similar physique. He’s also got more PhDs at his age than most people have in a lifetime, and Gideon chose him specifically for the unit. And he’s got an interesting choice in sweaters – Derek admires it, honestly, because it takes skill to wear something some of those patterns and not look awful – and some really obscure facts memorised.

He’s a nice kid.

Derek isn’t sure why Reid is avoiding him.

It starts off subtle: he’ll place himself next to JJ or Elle or Hotch when they’re in the jet, in what Derek brushes off as just how the chips fall until he realises every time Reid’s next to him, he’s not in the mood to talk. Even if he’d been in the middle of an explanation minutes ago. He’d never notice the pattern if he wasn’t looking for it.

The kid rambles to him on cases, if they end up sent somewhere together, but Derek has to prompt him to get him to share his ideas. And they are good ideas – Reid takes to profiling well. Sure, he’s a little awkward about talking to people but Derek can’t fault him for that.

Whenever he nudges the conversation into something even vaguely personal, Reid deflects – Derek doesn’t push but again, he’s overheard him talking to some of the others and it’s more curiosity than anything else.

(It stings. Just a little. It’s one thing to not be friends, another to avoid him.)

It’s tempting to out and ask Reid if he’s done something, said something wrong. But Derek knows it’d do nothing but force him to clam up: he’d get that deer-in-the-headlights look in his eyes even if he masks his facial expressions better, and then they’ll be further than ever from… hell, even acquaintances.

Friends, Derek supposes. Because he’d like to be friends, doesn’t see why they can’t be, and might have ruined his chances accidentally.

Fortunately, he doesn’t have to start that conversation.

“If you’re trying to make a joke, I don’t get it,” Reid says. “You’d be better off trying it on someone else.”

“Joke about what?” Derek asks. He goes back through the last couple of minutes, through details about the case, and comes up blank on what Reid is referring to.

Reid gives him an unimpressed look.

“No, seriously,” Derek says. “I don’t—”

“People always assume I don’t knowI’m unusual,” Reid says, rapid-fire. “I know I’m younger than they expect and I know infodumping is annoying and I know I don’t act as ‘masculine’ as is typically expected. You don’t have to remind me.”

…right.

Yeah, he’s definitely screwed up somewhere.

“I’m sorry for anything I said,” Derek says, “but I honestly don’t know what it was.”

Reid meets his eyes for a moment then looks away. “People do that a lot, too. I’m not sure if you’re joking or not.”

“I’m not,” Derek promises. “I really don’t know.”

This time Reid studies him more intently and he realises how irritated Reid is, his fidgeting more frequent and his eyebrows drawn closer together. Whatever it is, he wants to apologise for it.

“‘Pretty boy’?” Reid says, exasperated.

Oh.

Oh, shit.

“Crap, I didn’t know it made you uncomfortable,” Derek says. There’s a stone right in the pit of his stomach because oh god, this is bad. He knows how awful it feels and he hadn’t even asked, hadn’t stopped to think and of course Reid wouldn’t have corrected him, Reid, the newest member of the team, the youngest, the most inexperienced. “Reid, I’m sorry. I should’ve—”

“Isn’t that the point?” Reid says. “To make me uncomfortable.”

“No,” Derek says immediately. He feels sick. “That’s not what I meant, I’m sorry.”

Reid blinks. “What did you mean?”

“I didn’t really. It didn’t mean anything, it was just a nickname. I should’ve checked.”

“A good nickname?”

“It was meant to be,” Derek says. “That’s my fault, not yours.”

“Oh,” Reid says. “I thought it was meant as an insult.”

He swallows and fuck, he’s really done it, hasn’t he? Reid has every right to avoid him. “It wasn’t. I never asked you if you were okay with it, so I never told you it wasn’t. God, Reid, I really am sorry. I won’t call you it.”

“It isn’t inherently negative,” Reid says. “I… assumed it was. Other people have made similar jokes and did mean it.”

“You don’t have to explain,” Derek says.

“No, I want to,” he says. “You’ve been in high school, you know what it’s like for the queer kids.”

Right.

That just adds a whole new layer of awful.

He’s surprised Reid would want to be in the same room as him.

“Yeah,” he admits.

“When they said ‘pretty boy’ it wasn’t because they liked me.”

“I’m sorry,” Derek says. And it’s so laughably inadequate but what else is there to say?

“I am,” Reid says. “Queer. Bisexual, specifically. Just in case that matters.”

“No, no, that’s cool,” he says. Given the situation, he can’t really blame Reid for checking but it hurts all the same. How easy it would have been to just goddamn ask. “I didn’t mean to imply—”

“You didn’t know about me,” Reid says, “and I didn’t know how you meant it. I don’t think it’s either of our faults.”

Derek would have to disagree there, on account of it being definitely his fault. “I won’t call you it again.”

Reid pauses. “Actually… I don’t think I mind when it’s not them.”

“Reid.”

“What?”

“Don’t say that if you don’t mean it, I’m not gonna be mad at you for having boundaries.”

“I do mean it,” Reid says. “I’m not mad either.”

Derek breathes. Long and slow, and the tension in his chest unclenches a little. “Okay, kid, but if I ever make you feel uncomfortable—”

“I will,” Reid promises. “I—kid?”

---

A/N: I hope this doesn't come off as bashing because it absolutely isn't. I love Morgan and I love Reid and this was just a result of the prompt + me thinking about their childhoods. On a lighter note, the most unrealistic part of the show was actually Spencer Reid, an autistic bisexual, ever sitting on a chair correctly. I speak from experience.

[sepublic]

Hey! Hope I'm not bothering you, but since you already did an excellent take of Luz meeting the Amphibia girls, I'd love to hear your thoughts on what would happen if Amity were to ever meet Sasha.

           I’m honestly VERY flattered by this ask, this is such a fun one to me and admittedly I went overboard answering this… But I appreciate the compliment, it means a lot, and I myself love YOUR answers to asks regarding Amphibia!

           Sasha and Amity are definitely interesting characters to me! I think one of the key differences between the two, when it comes to either the ‘real’ Amity, or the cold façade she puts up…

           …It’s that she’s really not much for social interaction. I’m sure part of the reason is to keep up appearances of being an elitist Blight who has ‘high standards’ and whatnot regarding who she hangs out with, and her own trauma after the Willow incident definitely encourages Amity to not reach out in general, but. Even without her parents’ elitist abuse, she honestly gives me vibes of someone who’d prefer to mind their own business? That cold façade or not, she doesn’t really actively seek confrontation, and would rather mind her own business; Around Boscha and the others she’s clearly distant and tells them not to bully Willow because there’s no point.

           And with Willow? The one time we DO see her bully Willow, it’s at least implied –through retroactive revelations- that Amity may have legit been trying to reconnect with her friend, and/or didn’t realize how condescending she was being; Or at least, she THOUGHT what she was saying would actually encourage Willow to be better. She’s definitely internalized a lot of toxicity from her parents and siblings.

          Obviously Luz is helping with that, but in the end- Amity comes across as someone who would rather be left alone. If she feels like she’s being attacked or having her space invaded, she WILL retaliate… But again, she just wants to mind her own business and wishes for others to do the same. She only lets in a select few individuals who can really earn her trust, and that trust is something carefully earned and requires a lot of emotional navigation.

           Sasha is different- She’s very much a social person! Whilst Amity will snap and get right to the point, that NO, she does not like you… And when Amity DOES have to hang around others, she puts in the bare minimum of interaction and is clearly cold and distant otherwise; Sasha seems to prefer diplomacy! It’s one of the first things we see about her character, in contrast to Grime… Even if she’s annoyed by someone, she’s learned that honey attracts flies, not vinegar! Sasha doesn’t resort to confrontation or putting her foot down, unless she feels like she’s been specifically ‘pushed’ to that point.

           Not to mention, she very much seeks out people and friends! Sasha loves her social interaction, and while there’s some potential speculation on how her homelife may have contributed to this… This girl has to surround herself with other people to thrive, she gets energy from social interaction! She’s popular back at school, and captain of the cheerleading squad, which we know Sasha and Marcy aren’t members of- So that involves a close leadership and sway over a whole ‘nother group of classmates.

          Obviously a part of her is intrigued on what she can get from others, as seen with the Toads… But in general, I think Sasha does enjoy the feeling of getting to know others, and being loved, or at least adored! When she’s unhappy with Maggie, she makes a point to be diplomatic about the situation… And when Maggie continues pushing her, Sasha gives her another chance, but also adds onto the pressure by threatening to not invite Maggie. So there’s this idea of surrounding herself with others to maintain a sense of control, a certain possessiveness to Sasha here.

           Ultimately… I don’t think they’d really get along, alas! Even if it’s Amity as of now, or when we first see her, interacting with either Sasha pre or post-character development… These two likely wouldn’t get off to a good start! I see only Sasha making the first move; She’s a social butterfly and wants to get to know people, it’s good to make connections so you can utilize them! And this Amity Blight, she’s clearly talented and Top Student, she seems pretty cool! Sasha would likely offer herself up, maybe offer to buy lunch for her, hang out, etc.

           But Amity? Amity’s used to people like Boscha. She’s going to see the similarities. And even if she doesn’t? Well, Amity comes across to me as the kind of person, who… When she’s approached by others, her mind immediately fires on all cylinders as she starts desperately trying to figure out what this person wants, why they’re here, what their goal is, etc.! She can’t really imagine people wanting to get to know her just because… Again, not only because her abuse conditioned Amity to see others –herself included- only in terms of what they can do for others, but also because I think she just doesn’t understand social cues all too well.

           Amity would very much be on the defensive; She’d see Sasha coming in and reflexively put her walls up, become cold and put on a façade. She wouldn’t immediately snap at Sasha, but she’d definitely try to get the point across as subly as she can. The thing about Sasha to me is that she has both exterior and ulterior motives, simultaneously. When Sasha keeps pressing, Amity will likely reach a point where she just exhales, gets blunt, and asks Sasha what she wants and why she’s here, and to just ask or leave!

           And, Sasha will be surprised! She’ll be taken aback, but I don’t think she’ll take it personally- She’ll forgive Amity for the bluntness and try to assume the best before all else. I can see Sasha perhaps saying a thing or two, joking around, and Amity interprets it literally, and gets the impression that Sasha is making fun of her… So Sasha tries to clarify that no, she isn’t making fun of her! She’s being honest, she DOES want to be friends! Maybe she’ll try to laugh it off, tell Amity to relax, but it’s just going to make Amity feel like she’s being patronized.

           I think it’s worth noting that Sasha is friends with Marcy, and while Marcy definitely seems to have more connections with Anne than her… She’s still at least Sasha’s second-best friend, based on how much they hang around. Marcy is Autistic-coded, and to me and many others, Amity is ALSO Autistic-coded as well. If Sasha knows how to humor and handle Marcy’s infodumping and occasionally literal mind, then it’s possible she’d have the experience to navigate Amity.

           Though, Amity is still a VERY different and closed-off person than Marcy. I think a lot of their interaction would be filled with Sasha trying to figure Amity out, see what makes her tick- And Amity is getting all the more uncomfortable and suspicious, because she does NOT like being open or read by others, especially by this girl who probably sees her more as a trophy to collect or whatever… Amity just wants to mind her own business!

           And the thing about Sasha is- She’s also a troublemaker. A bit of a delinquent. She’s totally going to give Amity the same vibes as her older siblings, and that won’t be so great… Even if this is Amity as of the Season Finale, I think she’d still be wary, because she at least KNOWS Ed and Em, but she doesn’t know Sasha. Amity is still a person who’s very beholden to the rules, and unless Sasha specifically ‘proves’ herself to her, she’s going to look down on Sasha’s lack of reverence for school. In particular I think she’d react somewhat negatively to Sasha, should the girl casually dismiss Amity’s desire to study, over hanging out with her.

           And naturally, Sasha is going to get frustrated, she’ll wonder what this Blight girls’ deal is- She’s trying SO hard to be nice and diplomatic, she really is trying to navigate Amity’s ‘eccentricities’! I think she’d sooner just give up and do her own thing, leave Amity be, as the two of them agree to just mind one another’s business and exist separately. I don’t think Sasha would feel the need to specifically step in, especially since Amity isn’t really a friend to begin with, and clearly just wants to be left alone. Sasha only seems to ‘step in’ when she feels she has a certain hold on others, and Amity is far too distant.

           So, Sasha can read the room… She’d approach Amity, want to be friends. Amity gets suspicious and assumes the worst, and even if it’s not the worst she’s just not intrigued in general. Sasha is a troublemaker, and Amity’s trust requires a lot of emotional work and honesty that Sasha isn’t just used to- So Sasha reads the room and leaves, no other questions asked!

           …Although, if Sasha WERE more interested… It’d be interesting if she learned what Amity’s situation is like, specifically with her strict parents. I can’t say much about Sasha’s own upbringing, but given her current scenario as of Toadcatcher and how she’s very much overthrowing the authorities to establish her own rule…

           I think Sasha would try to pull something off similar to Anne (in a scenario where she REALLY wants to get close with Amity), and try to goad Amity into just ignoring her parents, and being her own person! And while her intentions are good and Amity being her own person is a net positive, I think she’d handle it about as constructively as Emira and Edric, and end up just making Amity feel pressured to get into trouble, be far too dismissive and condescending of Amity’s feelings, and cause the girl to feel like she’s being made fun of and all the stuff she looks up to is casually trashed!

           And, Emira and Edric are her siblings. Unless the Blight Parents specifically ask Amity to hang out with Sasha, this girl isn’t going to have any of it; She’s going to snap, and she’ll tell Sasha to back off. And while Sasha might be taken aback and even get a little bit offended, again… She’d rather things go smoothly, and not create unnecessary conflict. I think she’d read the room, and then leave.

          Worst-case scenario, she TRIES to ‘step in’ and exert her influence… But really, Sasha has none over Amity, whose family is considered superior even amongst other noble families, and also she has magic! The girl was the Grudgby Captain for a reason. Sasha is going to recognize the situation and see she’s not wanted, and it’s not worth it- No point getting riled up, this isn’t someone close to her like Anne or Marcy! So again- She leaves! Although…

           This is Sasha prior to Reunion. But as of Toadcatcher, where she’s clearly becoming a lot more blunt about her feelings, a lot more physical and smashing her way through things? Still capable of manipulation, but also doubting her abilities… Amidst her own brief self-reflection over how she treated Anne? Then, depending on exactly what she’s aiming for here (and to be honest my read on Sasha as of Toadcatcher is a little blurry, I think the show is trying to be ambiguous as to her exact headspace given she’s still figuring things out herself)…

           MAYBE Sasha tries to get her way by brute force, but again, I doubt it. Unless it’s something she REALLY specifically needs, I don’t see her picking a fight, because even if she’s getting physically blunt, she’s also being emotionally blunt as well. When it comes to emotions her tactic is to run away and close her eyes, look the other direction- So Sasha is going to deny that this bothers her.

          She’s going to insist that Amity’s constant rejections aren’t getting to her. She’s just going to LEAVE, and let it be! It’s fine, what’re you talking about? And if this is engaging with Amity, as of her character development? Same thing, really… Amity may be a bit less cold and dismissive, a little less elitist- But she’s also learning to prioritize herself and to remove herself from situations she doesn’t like. She’s not going to be ready for Sasha anytime soon, probably not ever!

           Worst-case scenario, Sasha gets a little TOO personal and straight-forward, trying to give advice to Amity on what’ll make her happy- And Amity will snap. Sasha might feel a bit offended, maybe begin to doubt herself and feel like her charisma and ‘touch’ has been waning… but ultimately she’s going to deny her feelings, shrug, and leave Amity be. Both girls will mutually agree to let the other exist in isolation from the other, maybe stepping in if the other is in trouble and somebody else isn’t already there to help.

           …But for fun! Let’s talk about if they WERE friends, by some inexplicable, stroke of fate and circumstance!

           Sasha is definitely going to be someone who’s VERY mindful of how Amity functions, what she likes, what bothers her, that sort of thing! She’ll know Amity’s schedule by heart, and she’ll focus on helping the girl calm down, or be less cold… She’d be a more diplomatic voice for Amity! She’d definitely handle most of Amity’s social interactions for her… In particular, I see Sasha acting as a ‘gatekeeper’, evaluating others who are trying to reach out to Amity, seeing if they’d bother her friend or not; And if so, telling them to get lost, but in a way that’s subtle and casual. But of course, if the person keeps pushing their luck… Well, this is Sasha’s close friend, so she’s going to feel insulted, and eventually she’ll reach a scary point.

           In general, I would see Sasha as someone who can automatically read Amity, and tell whenever she’s in a situation she’s uncomfortable with… So she swoops in and takes Amity’s place, giving her an out and direction the attention to herself! She’s going to help defend Amity from anybody who annoys her, and she’ll do what she can to support the girl; She’ll probably held lead cheerleading rallies for a Grudgby game or two, although Amity would likely tell her to stop, that’s excessive, and you don’t need to do that! And Sasha says that’s silly, they’re friends after all!

           I’m not sure if I can see a scenario where Sasha has control over Amity, though. Again, the Blights come across as more high-class and powerful than Sasha’s family, whatever they might be like. I think she’d be a bit like Boscha to Amity, except a lot more receptive to how this girl feels, telling her that she’s all that and has nothing to worry about; You ARE the Top Student for a reason, don’t let anybody else make you think otherwise! If your parents or siblings are mean to you, they just can’t appreciate you properly! And Amity’s going to appreciate that, but occasionally ask Sasha not to go that far- And Sasha understands, and lets it go!

           As for Amity, I can see her occasionally flexing her power and position, in a scenario where Sasha encounters someone who isn’t impressed. During social events, she’ll quietly gravitate towards Sasha for comfort and reassurance, and Sasha will instantly recognize. I don’t see her helping Sasha cheat or anything, but Amity would definitely at least help her with homework and give pointers, though she wouldn’t outright do it for her, she’s still too beholden to the rules for that.

          Anytime Amity DOES reciprocate or voluntarily show affection, it’s going to mean a lot to Sasha. I can definitely see Sasha beginning to have concerns over the abuse of Amity’s parents and how they’re indoctrinating her, and how she’d see the Emperor’s Coven as a bit toxic… But ultimately, I’m not sure if she’d be able to do much, there’s a LOT of factors to take into consideration here! I feel that should Sasha try to step in, she and Amity still wouldn’t be that close and Amity may rebuke her…

          And because they ARE actual friends, it WILL hurt Sasha, and maybe she’ll take it personally and become a bit bitter. Maybe even entitled, because she’s worked so hard to make Amity happy and protect her, and this is how she gets treated!? I can see Sasha intiating some distance at first, and Amity gets hurt by that and immediately accepts this as her new scenario and doesn’t try going back to Sasha, not because she’s better, but because she’s already screwed up and why would Sasha want to go back to her?

          But ultimately, Sasha’s going to come back because she craves social interaction, and in the end she DOES care. I can also imagine Amity and Sasha contributing some toxicity towards one another, as they never learn to actually confront these issues but just sweep them under the rug; Sasha might enable Amity’s tendency to snap and lash out, tell her she can do no wrong, while Amity would just enable and lowkey encourage Sasha’s controlling behavior over others- At the very least she won’t speak up against it.

          They wouldn’t confront one another over their flaws, especially since they may not be self-aware enough to even notice them in the first place; And in Amity’s case, she might not want to jeopardize her relationship with Sasha, and it’d go against what her parents taught her anyway. She might be a little concerned, but ultimately, what does she know? Sasha seems way more confident, she likely understands herself better than Amity does.

          Due to her lineage, I think Amity would retain the ‘power’ in the friendship, or at least not fall under Sasha’s possessive control… But Amity would still doubt herself in general and not be fully genuine. She’d see what Sasha does as typical things that loved ones do for one another because of her parents, even if Amity wouldn’t really flex this type of control over any of her friends to begin with!

          She’s not going to participate, but she won’t speak out either, and that’s going to contribute to Sasha’s own assumption that she knows and does best. Really, I see these two not quite agreeing with how the other treats people, but otherwise not objecting either! If it were up to them, Sasha and Amity would do things their own way, but besides that there’s no point in jeopardizing their friendship over such a ‘minor’ issue.

          Sasha would come across as the ‘reasonable’ friend, while Amity is more the cold and blunt one. Sometimes Sasha tells someone who bugged Amity to back off, other times she’ll reassure them, tell them that’s just how Amity is, and then invite them to be friends; While still keeping them from Amity of course!

          Amity’s fine with this, she just wants to be left alone and doen’t control who Sasha is without her. The girls at least respect each other in that way. I can definitely see Sasha as someone who can reason with Amity and get her to lower her guard a bit, maybe even reconsider her stance on another person, but that’s about it. Sasha is very much the only person who can really ‘talk’ to Amity. Sometimes she’ll get her to cool down, other times she just steps aside and/or helps defend Amity. It really depends on the mood of the day, the person in question, etc.!

           I don’t think Sasha would be able to fully understand Amity. I think she’d try to listen to Amity’s insecurities, try to give advice and understanding. But ultimately she’s someone with her own issues as well; She’s no Luz, who I think would just naturally get Amity to open up and make her a lot happier! And I can see Sasha maybe even scouting out Luz specifically for this purpose, because she seems like a cool and friendly person, and if she can make Amity happy and openly laugh, then she HAS to have her in the group!

           And… those are more or less my thoughts on how Sasha and Amity would interact, within a few different contexts! I’m not exactly an expert on either character, all of this is speculation, and I confess I don’t know Sasha as well as others… Especially given her mindset in Toadcatcher, where it seems like she’s still figuring herself out! Also, I apologize for VERY much going overboard in answering this ask… I suppose I got excited, because this is a very fascinating concept to me, and I feel obligated to fully explore it in every way I can, in order to do it justice!

[hypnowave]

List 5 things that make you happy, then put this in the askbox for the last 10 people who reblogged something from you. Learn to know your mutuals and followers ❤

okay ily for sending me this no joke!! this is such a huge infodump i'm actually going to cry

1) just dance + dance central 3,, you DEFINITELY expected this one, i never shut up about how much i love both of these games and how they've helped me get exercise 6 days a week during the pandemic. i don't even OWN a copy of dance central 3 yet (though that might change when i get off my ass and actually spend some time looking at secondhand xbox 360s and kinect sensors) but it was something i was completely obsessed with in my childhood and it feels really nice to be able to talk about how happy it makes me without feeling shameful about it being weird or niche. it's a game where you can time travel using the power of swag dance moves, what's not to love?? on the other hand, i got a digital copy of just dance 2020 on discount not long after i got my switch, and i've managed to get the megastar rating on 95 songs so far! i'm hoping to hit 100 before just dance 2021 releases in two to three days, but even if i don't manage to get it by then, i'm still pretty excited to hit that milestone. i'm also currently trying to memorize the choreography for the alternate routine for lady gaga's bad romance and oof ouch my bones

2) i started watching buzzfeed unsolved true crime about two days ago and i'm absolutely hooked. i have no idea how i've gone so long without watching it (save for one episode that i took a look at because i was curious about the particular case they were talking about), but it's nice finally having something to put on while i eat my meals that isn't pokemon or among us. both games are great, but sometimes you just need to throw something fresh into the mix, y'know? it also feels nice going on a true crime kick again in general, haha.

3) I LOVE MY CHARACTERS AND ART and i've been drawing a lot of humans recently! i feel like i'm actively improving and that i'm gradually becoming more confident with my human artwork. i'm no maestro and i know my work isn't astounding by any means, but doodling my friends' characters and seeing their reactions has helped me push forward and try new things when it comes to art. i don't draw my own characters as often, but i've been working on some new plots and it's slowly coming together and it's giving me that sweet sweet serotonin. tangentially related but my FRIENDS' characters and art also makes me incredibly happy. i'm now going to annoy the hell out of them by tagging them; @/polygarnstars you know i would absolutely die for all of your characters (especially bate and fanael. horrible children) + i swear you know my own characters better than i do, @supernovacity if i had a nickel for every time i drew eyvind i'd probably be able to get a better laptop and drawing tablet by now, @arasolcan YOUR CHARACTER CONCEPTS AND DESIGNS SLAP and i always love when i get a chance to hear about them and doodle them, @kingsmanmechanics the starboys live rent free in my head and our current AU is SO GOOD i love it, @fihyn hello i love elvoth and co., and i should honestly take a shot and drawing more of your characters!! they're so unique and i'm excited to see what you have planned for 'em.

4) my cats,, i have five cats and they all share one brain cell. mochi usually has that brain cell. kiki still doesn't understand that she's not allowed on the bed and i've given up on trying to convey it to her sgdhgnshfkd

5) uhh i'm highkey blanking out because i really gotta go get some sleep but man, i can't believe i'm in university. sure, it's a stressful thing to go through, and i'm not going to pretend that the pandemic isn't making it even harder to socialize and get out of my comfort zone, but a year ago i was thoroughly convinced that i wouldn't get to experience this. the fact that i managed to get here and study the things i'm interested is amazing to me and i don't think i give myself enough credit for that :")

[actuallyvady]

Vady Reads MDZS - Reincarnation

An explanation of these posts can be found here

Wei Wuxian has been resurrected by means of a dark ritual. He has been offered a body in exchange for revenge, but the details of that revenge are unknown to him. He must follow through anyway, or he will be destroyed, never to be reincarnated. He learns what he can of the person who gave him his new body. 

More under the cut.

We get more infodump here, mostly about Mo Xuanyu’s background. I don’t think the specifics are important to record, but there are some important pieces of info.

The Mo family are not cultivators, and regard cultivators with awe. 

Mo Xuanyu was crazy, but only after he was thrown out-- “as if his life was scared out of him.” 

Mo Xuanyu was gay.

Mo Xuanyu was bullied by his family to the point of sacrificing his own life in order to get revenge. 

The story of Mo Xuanyu continues the theme of reputation, and adds a layer of the fickleness of people’s esteem. His mother was the child of a servant, and looked down on. She then attracted a cultivator’s eye, and gained esteem for it-- the family took pride in her. Then he left her and their attitude changed again. Their regard for her, and for her son, changes easily. 

The divide between the Mo family and the cultivation world is an interesting contrast; the prologue was all from the perspective of the cultivation world, and these people… what does the Mo family even know about Wei Wuxian? Would they recognize the name? What rumors would they have heard? Mo Xuanyu would have heard it from his time as a disciple, but the rest of them? This is probably the last place anyone would look for the fearsome YiLing Patriarch, though-- why would he be reborn in this backwater hicktown?

I love the detail that the family thinks Mo Ziyuan could have been a great cultivator-- Wuxian seems real dismissive of that. Does a person have to be born with a talent for it? That may be something that is known to those who are familiar with the genre. Based on Wuxian’s response to the idea, though, it seems like becoming a cultivator requires being born to it, in some way, and that Mo Ziyuan-- a child with no cultivator in his ancestry-- would likely not have it, where Mo Xuanyu-- whose father was not merely a cultivator, but the leader of a prominent sect, and presumably very powerful-- did. 

This is the first time homosexuality is mentioned, and… it’s not entirely clear to me whether it is itself something shameful, or whether the shame was that he “harassed” other disciples. Probably both-- if he had “harassed” female disciples, that would have been normal, not scandalous. Textually speaking, though, that’s not really made clear. He also is wearing makeup-- badly applied, horrible looking makeup, but makeup. Is that supposed to be because he was gay or because he was crazy? 

(I have some thoughts about Mo Xuanyu being crazy, but as I am attempting to keep this centered only on what I have read so far, I won’t mention them-- they’re based on stuff we find out later. I want to see, with this re-read, whether that headcanon holds up.)

(Speaking of things we don’t know yet: let’s start tracking characters that are bullied, picked on, or treated terribly! The count so far is just Mo Xuanyu, and his response was to sacrifice himself to summon the most evil spirit he could think of to kill his entire family. Also, he is treated this way mostly for shit that’s not his fault-- while his disgraceful return to Mo Village was due to his actions, he’s mistreated because his family hated his mother, because they think he ‘stole’ Ziyuan’s chance to be a cultivator, and because he’s crazy. Also, there’s the very real possibility that he was kicked out of the sect because he was gay-- yes, the scandal was due to his actions, but would the same thing have happened if he had been harassing women? Let’s keep an eye on people who are bullied, why they are bullied, and how they respond.)

In this chapter we already start to see cracks in what we were told about Wei Wuxian in the prologue. 

That one of his first thoughts is “when did I do something as immoral as…” is telling. The people celebrating Wei Wuxian’s death certainly would not have put stealing a body past him, but he himself thinks it is immoral and that he wouldn’t do it? His first thought is basically “how dare you!” but after that he’s… confused, groggy, and not at all the terrifying YiLing Patriarch that we heard about last chapter. 

He does realize what happened almost immediately-- he recognizes the array, or is able to decipher it enough to know what it did. It is an “ancient, forbidden technique” that he presumably had studied at some point, to figure it out right away, which does align with what we’ve heard, at least as far as his skills and abilities are concerned. Turns out the talk of his doing evil magics was at least partially true! 

… but he “refuses to accept” the whole deal because he is not, in his mind, an “extremely villainous ghoul.” 

I have to laugh at the phrasing here (and I wish I could read the original to know if the tone is the same) where he thinks “his reputation wasn’t great.” My dude, we just had a whole prologue in which the entire cultivation world celebrated your death. Whether or not you were “extremely villainous,” your reputation was way worse than “not great.” 

It is interesting that he says he was a harmless ghost-- that he did not seek vengeance. That goes directly counter to one of the things we were told last chapter, that if he was ever to return he would unleash hell. 

I absolutely adore that he whines “how could this happen to me…” about being given a body (do you not… want to live again? Or is it the requirement to take revenge that you don’t want to do? In any case, you are the fearsome YiLing Patriarch, stop whining like a child), and that the last thing in this chapter is “you’ve got the wrong person.” Wei Wuxian knows exactly what they said about him-- he lists off several things-- but he also tells us, with that last line, that he is not what Mo Xuanyu thought. 

So, what do we know about Wei Wuxian, now that we’re in his head? 

Whiny*

Does not think of himself as particularly evil

Would not have stolen a body

Experienced with dark, forbidden magics

Thinks he is the wrong person to call on for revenge

Now, looking at this chapter in terms of how it functions… it’s a jarring change. The prologue had no characters; it was all dialogue from unnamed cultivators. It also spoke of great and important events, and the narrator was distant, telling the audience things but not from any one perspective. Here we are in Wei Wuxian’s head, seeing things from his perspective, and the events are… mundane. An asshole cousin beats him up and trashes his room because he complained to his parents. There’s obviously more going on-- a dark ritual, an array painted in blood, a tragic backstory-- but we are thrown into this scene that is very petty. 

Having our viewpoint character not know what is happening is a useful device; we don’t have to be told things he already knows because he doesn’t know what’s going on. We get to figure things out along with him. At the same time, we have this setup where we have been told a lot of things about who our viewpoint character is, and we can immediately see that the grandiose caricature presented in the prologue is… not particularly accurate. The fearsome YiLing Patriarch, whose power could level mountains and empty seas, is confused and annoyed at having been forced into a body to enact someone’s revenge. 

Two chapters in, and we have been shown: do not believe what the rumor mill says, it’s almost certainly exaggerated, and potentially entirely wrong. 

*okay, that might be a bit harsh, but seriously, he repeats “how could this happen to me” several times as he figures out what happened. Still, it’s definitely not the sort of behavior I would have assumed from the prologue’s descriptions of him. 

[mewmewchann]

Can you tell me a bit about ur dangan oc’s? They all seem very interesting and it would be cool to learn more about them! I like Haruto he’s so cute

Sure thing! And thank you!(and yeah Haruto is best boy)

I’m putting this under a cut because this is very long. (I mean I’m giving an infodump about my OCs, of course it’s long. XD)

Please send me more asks if you want to!

Let’s start with the Despair From the Heart cast. (my HC for Danganronpa 52)

Kokoro (Ultimate Lucky Student) is basically just endless bouncy optimism. She has a part-time job as a stage idol and wanted to do it full-time before getting her letter from Starlight Academy. She’s basically best girl.

Jasper (Ultimate ???) didn’t actually forget his talent like the Ultimate ???s we’ve seen in canon. He refuses to say it for his own reasons, but he insists he does have one. He initially comes off as a smooth and polite person, but does have a bit of an unsettling and mysterious aura about him.However, (this isn’t really a spoiler since I’ve revealed this already) he’s also REALLY twisted and fucked in the head. The extent of this will be explored later in DFTH.

Haruto (Ultimate Broadway Actor and Ultimate Best Boy) admired Broadway shows for a long time and vowed to be up there on stage one day. It took a lot of work, but he finally got there. Personality-wise, he’s cool, charismatic and a flirtatious ladies man. But he doesn’t have a big ego like you’d expect and is a nice and genuine person. However despite this, he does have the capability to be useful in the trials.

Amai (Ultimate Digital Artist) is a very popular online artist (SweetDevil45chaotic dumbass not exactly the sharpest knife in the drawer, and does sometimes believe that she’s nothing without her fans behind her.(also, her and Kokoro previously knew each other as they were friends online.)

Ahmya (Ultimate Archer, yeah I know it’s been done a lot) is an excellent archer despite her age. However her skill got her targeted (pun not intended) by a rival competitor, who hired someone to shoot her eye out during a competition. She still managed to win though, which led to her earning her talent. Ahmya is cold and bitter, to the point where she seems emotionally detached. However, this is mainly because she feels satisfied with her own company. But she becomes less cold if you warm up to her.

Sachiko (Ultimate Delinquent) is the group’s resident badass. As a result of being kicked out of multiple schools, her parents decided enough was enough and sent her to a prestigious private school to reform her bad behaviour, but she managed to topple the school’s hierarchy in a week. She’s aggressive, sarcastic, bitter and a LOT stronger than her thin physique suggests, and she doesn’t respect rules and authority at all. However, she does have a (repressed) softer side and is a bit of a tsundere.

Saiko (Ultimate Historian) ended up studying history after becoming interested in the subject as a result of his father working as a history professor at a college. He wrote a number of reports and papers on different time periods, and his intellect caught the other professors’ attention, leading to his work getting published by well respected sources and him becoming devoted to the subject. Saiko is charismatic and a bit of a flirt, but can come across as entitled and cocky. He also has a habit of saying something blunt or hurtful or that kind of thing, then immediately saying that he’s kidding.(his hair also has a gelled-down ahoge. I think that’ll give you all you need to know.)

Miko (Ultimate Bladesmith) lived with his uncle in the Japanese mountains for a lot of his life. (he never talks about to his parents and deflects the question when asked about them) His uncle was a blacksmith, which lead him to learning the art of making blades and excelling despite his young age. Miko is sensible and polite (with some people comparing his personality to the grace and honour of a samurai), but even though he comes off as intimidating and serious (which he can be), that doesn’t mean he doesn’t know how to have fun. However, despite his talent suggesting otherwise, he hates unnecessary violence, but he does know how to fight if he needs to defend himself.Also, a kind of running joke is that as a result of living in the Japanese mountains with no access to television or the internet, he knows practically nothing when it comes to millenial/pop culture. (at some point he asked Amai what a meme was and she laughed for 10 solid seconds before she realised he was serious)

Kaoru (Ultimate cinnamon roll Paediatrician) was bullied a lot for his weak-willed nature, which lead to him spending most of his time helping at the hospital where his parents worked. By chance one day, he found himself helping a young girl with a checkup in the paediatric ward. Due to his naturally gentle and kind demeanour, Kaoru found that he was talented in helping children and his parents were impressed with this, so he worked exclusively in the paediatric ward as a result. Kaoru is very kind and polite, but he’s also shy, fragile and has low self-esteem. However, this does a complete 180 when he’s doing medical work, where he becomes more serious and confident. He also has useful medical knowledge thanks to helping at the hospital for a long time.

Ayano (Ultimate Physicist) was sent to a specialist high school, and worked VERY hard in order to please her parents, excelling in the difficult subject of physics as a result and eventually studying at a university level while still at high school and even teaching younger year groups while in her senior year. Ayano is well-meaning and VERY smart, but can be blunt and pessimistic, and tends to overrule emotion with logic in her reasoning. Also, because of all the work she’s done, her sleep schedule has been permanently fucked up.

Rikona (Ultimate Chess Player) grew up in an orphanage as her parents weren’t in a position to raise her. Despite this, she yearned for a life of riches and found her calling one day when she easily beat an older girl at chess when she played for the first time. Despite her age, she managed to get a number of competition wins under her belt. Personality-wise, Rikona is kinda a mix between Hiyoko and Celeste. One moment she’s an entitled princess, and the next she’s a bitchy little girl who likes belittling people. (she also calls people “peasant” a lot)

Yuuma (Ultimate Jeweller) lived with his father after his parents divorced when he was 11. His father runs a jewellery company known as The Velvet Box, so Yuuma learned how to make jewellery to help. However when he was 15, his father suddenly fell sick due to copper poisoning and wasn’t able to make jewellery anymore, so Yuuma had to continue running The Velvet Box in his place. In the years that followed, The Velvet Box grew into a larger company mainly due to his designs. His appearance and height (him and Rikona are the shortest members of the cast) kinda gives the impression of him being like an overactive child, but even though he does act like an overactive child quite a bit, he is a lot more mature and cunning that he seems, as well as being cheerful and a generally good kid. However, he does have the tendency to be reckless and hotheaded, and is really, REALLY sassy.

Okay, that’s the DFTH cast done, is there anyone else I should-Oh yeah, I should mention Nisetaro, shouldn’t I.

Nisetaro was originally a very minor character in my rewrite AU thing of V3, but I ended up falling in love with him so much I ended up giving him a personality. He doesn’t actually have an Ultimate talent. He works as an intern for Team Danganronpa. He has anxiety and is pretty self-deprecating (and also apparently has depression), and kinda uses sarcasm as a front for that. However he is a genuinely nice person, and really hates Tsumugi.(he is also chaotic gay and has a crush on Shuichi)

[mediaeval-muse]

Book Review... Justina Ireland, “Dread Nation”

Rating: 3/5 stars

Reviewer Comments: I’m a sucker for alternate history stories, and when this book flew across my social media a few months ago, I was eager to pick it up. The premise is an exciting one - a woman of color battling zombies in a steampunk post-Civil War era? Sign me up! The book did deliver on that front, so people who love zombie flicks or steampunk will adore this novel. Where it fell short for me was in the writing - it’s not that the writing was poor, it’s just that it does a lot of things technically that I associate with the YA genre (and that I dislike). I would still recommend this book, though, if you’re looking to expand your reading list to include more sci-fi/fantasy by authors of color.

***Full review under the cut.***

Summary:  Jane McKeene was born two days before the dead began to walk the battlefields of Gettysburg and Chancellorsville—derailing the War Between the States and changing America forever. In this new nation, safety for all depends on the work of a few, and laws like the Native and Negro Reeducation Act require certain children attend combat schools to learn to put down the dead. But there are also opportunities—and Jane is studying to become an Attendant, trained in both weaponry and etiquette to protect the well-to-do. It’s a chance for a better life for Negro girls like Jane. After all, not even being the daughter of a wealthy white Southern woman could save her from society’s expectations. But that’s not a life Jane wants. Almost finished with her education at Miss Preston’s School of Combat in Baltimore, Jane is set on returning to her Kentucky home and doesn’t pay much mind to the politics of the eastern cities, with their talk of returning America to the glory of its days before the dead rose. But when families around Baltimore County begin to go missing, Jane is caught in the middle of a conspiracy, one that finds her in a desperate fight for her life against some powerful enemies. And the restless dead, it would seem, are the least of her problems.

Things I Liked

Friendship between Jane and Katherine: Our two primary female characters dislike each other at the beginning of the book, but slowly become friends over the course of the novel. I like stories about developing friendships, and it was great to see one between such opposites.

Frankness About Racial Tension: Racial tension is integral to the plot of this book, and I’m glad that the author did not steer clear of it despite her story being set in the post-Civil War era. From reading, you are made well aware that just because slavery is illegal, that doesn’t mean that racism doesn’t exist or that slavery isn’t being repackaged into something else. Ireland is also clear that there are racial tensions with the indigenous peoples, and white people don’t get to escape blame for the hurt they cause despite being on the “right side” of the war.

Imagination: Probably my favorite thing about this novel was the way Ireland imagined what America would have looked like if a zombie plague happened during the end of the Civil War. I liked that she imagined new political parties forming, new institutions directed by the flow of events, and the mythical “safe havens” in the West. It all seemed very organic.

Things I Didn’t Like

Infodumping: Because this book is told from a first person perspective, we get information delivered to us at awkward times. The worldbuilding is communicated to us via Jane telling the reader important information, which feels a bit unnatural in a first person perspective. Things about Jane’s past is also told to us, such as her past with Jackson (which feels awkward because we’re told of her feelings more than we see them). Other characters deliver information about history or what’s going on behind the scenes in long monologues. Because of all the infodumping, it was hard to see the emotional attachments between Jane and the world around her.

Protagonist: As much as I liked watching Jane kick some zombie ass, I ultimately didn’t feel like I could connect with her. She always seems to be the smartest person in the room, and her “flaws” also don’t seem to be flaws at all, just moments where she butts heads with societal norms. I would have liked a more fully-realized character with more complexity.

Plot: There were A LOT of things going on in this book - so much that I honestly think it could have been split up and certain elements teased out more. Much of the way the plot moves along, too, is contingent on happenstance, which made it feel like Jane was making very few agentive choices. Maybe that was the point, since much of this book is centered on institutionalized racism, but so much of the plot felt like things just happening rather than events building on one another, building tension until something breaks.

Recommendations: I would recommend this book if you’re interested in

zombies, survival stories

steampunk, alternate history

Similar Reads

[brigdh]

Reading Wednesday

Barbary Station by R.E. Stearns. Adda and Iridian are two engineers newly out of university and in love; Adda specializes in Artificial Intelligences while Iridian is an army vet who does mechanical engineering. Unfortunately in the capitalist dystopia of the future, they're both saddled with enormous student debt and see their only future as signing draconian job contracts that will force them to live on separate planets. So instead they decide to join the galaxy's foremost pirate crew! :D However, when they reach Barbary Station – the nickname of the abandoned space station the ungendered pirate Captain Sloane has taken over – they find out that matters are more complicated than they appear. Namely, the station is controlled by a murderous AI security program determined to kill all "invaders" (ie, the pirates), and there's no way for anyone to escape or for help from the outside to arrive. The pirates, in fact, have been stuck there for the last two years (long enough for a few kids to have been born) and have deliberately lured Adda there without warning in the hopes that she knows enough about AIs to provide a solution. If she can do so, she and Iridian might just escape with their lives and be given the chance to join the pirate crew. Complicating matters is the fact that most of the pirates fought on the opposite side of the recent war than Iridian did, and some of them might just hold enough of a grudge to secretly kill one or both of our main characters. So that's the plot. As for my opinion on it.... Argh, I have such mixed feelings about this book. On the one hand: lesbian space pirates of color! INCREDIBLE! And there are some genuinely fantastic bits of worldbuilding. One of my favorites was the notion that people living on a space station don't use terms like north and south or starboard and port, but rather lockside (ie, towards the airlock, towards the outside) and homeward (the opposite, deeper into the station). I loved that everyone in the pirate crew had to justify how much atmo (a slang term combining oxygen, pressure, heat, gravity, and all the other stuff it takes to keep a human alive in space) they used; anyone who cost more than they brought in was likely to get booted. "The cold and the black" is a common substitute for saying "space", which is deliciously eerie. On the other hand... there are a lot of problems. The worldbuilding is incredibly complicated and prone to being conveyed in confusing infodumps. As a random example: "The forty ticks shuttle to and from the hub has never been hit before.” Signs in the docking bay below the base put the pirates twenty-three ticks from the docking bay which served as station north at 100/0. That was the point where the increments that divided the station into one hundred virtual cross-level slices started over at one. The shuttle was closer to forty-six ticks, over a third docking bay, if the symmetric modular layout continued all the way around the station. Ring station points of reference were much easier to follow with a mobile map. A more helpful station AI would’ve been nice too. “The shuttle’s a blind spot,” said Si Po. WHAT. I cannot turn that into an image in my head despite reading it four times now. Indeed, after finishing the whole book, I still have no idea of the details of the often-referenced past war or any coherent sense of what the station or the pirate's hull base looks like; there are all sorts of plot twists hinging on the difference between a regular AI, a zombie AI, and an awakened AI, whatever the hell those are. This bewilderment is not helped by the fact that the book seems to have needed one more editing pass; occasional dropped words or repeated words make things even more confusing. (And I bought a physical copy, so it's not just an ebook's miscoding!) For example: Her armor’s O2 reservoir had enough empty space for the portable tank’s remaining contents. When she connected the O2 tank to her suit, her HUD reported that the suit reservoir had enough empty space for the portable tank’s remaining contents. To be fair, this example is by far the worst in the book. I didn't notice a whole sentence repeated anywhere else. Adda and Iridian are an established relationship at the beginning of the book, which should be fine – I'm actually a huge fan of established relationships and wish they were more common in fiction! Their romance is extremely healthy and conflict-free. That's nice and all, but it unfortunately doesn't make for intriguing reading. Nothing changes between them over the course of the whole book because there's nothing to improve on from what's already there. The closest thing to a plot in their relationship is that Iridian wants to propose to Adda, but can't find a good moment to do so. That is not exactly page-turning suspense. You can totally write healthy, established relationships that have exciting plots, but Adda and Iridian have no tension, no worry, no angst, no drama, no longing, no victory between them – nothing to make me care about them as characters or as a couple. In addition, the explanation behind Adda and Iridian's decision to become space pirates never convinced me. I mean, student loan debt sucks, but we've got plenty of it in the US today and roving bands of pirates have not yet appeared. As Iridian puts it at one point, They’d sacrificed all the money they had, their clean criminal records, their academic connections, hell, maybe even their Near Earth Union citizenship, for this. Not to mention risking their lives. I need to believe they would give all that up, and they're just not given enough of a reason. They also seem weirdly disconnected from the reality of being pirates; they both reiterate at multiple points that they don't believe in murder, and Adda even gets upset at seeing a minor character beaten up. I can enjoy the Disneyfied version of piracy myself, but it's a moral dissonance that's hard to sustain for an entire adult novel that's taking itself seriously. What does piracy even mean to Adda and Iridian if it apparently involves nothing immoral? So, in conclusion... I have no idea. There are amazing parts to Barbary Station, there are dumb parts, there are ill-thought out parts. Do I recommend it? Eh, who knows. Overall I'm glad I read it rather than skipping it, but it could have been a great deal better than it is. The Birds at My Table: Why We Feed Wild Birds and Why It Matters by Darryl Jones. A nonfiction book about the science and research behind those little feeders many of us hang up in our backyards or apartment fire escapes. From the cover and blurb, I'd expected a light, breezy read, but The Birds at My Table is instead a quite academic review of the various studies that have analyzed how and why humans feed birds, the effect of all this free seed on the birds themselves, and the history of bird-feeding as an organized hobby and (these days) enormous commercial industry. Sometimes academic to the book's detriment, to be honest; I was looking forward to funny anecdotes more than I was to analyses of the calcium/phosphorus ratios in seed mixes or the effect of adding Vitamin E to fat-heavy supplementary foods. Still, there's lot of interesting factoids to be found here. Did you know that bird-feeding is hugely controversial in Australia, with many wildlife organizations recommending against it? Or that many Australians who feed their backyard birds anyway do so with meat instead of seed? I was also fascinated to learn that one potential cause of the passenger pigeon's extinction may have been trichomoniasis, a disease commonly carried by the non-native pigeon of city streets, and which may have been passed across species by their coming into close contact at feeders. Overall a good book if you're interested in the topic of feeding birds, but only if you're prepared for a rigorous dive into the current scientific research. I read this as an ARC via NetGalley.

[DW link for easier commenting]

[ladyautie]

While exploring the internet, I came across an article about a book with an interesting concept. Basically, it’s a novel in which being autistic is the norm and Neurotypicals are considered as disabled.

When I looked up the name of the author, I was pretty disappointed to see that she was Neurotypical and that her only experience was to spend six months in a camp with autistic people. Not the best starting point. But she was young (only eighteen) and seemed full of good intentions, so I decided to take a chance. And it was... not as bad as I thought it would be. But not great either.

The story is called “Dépourvu” (Devoid in english) and is written by a canadian author, Victoria Grondin. I’m assuming there might be an english version somewhere, because the one I read specified that it was the “french version”.

[picture of the book cover of “Dépourvu”. It features a white blonde teenager, with a red scarf, looking at us with a shy smile. She’s surrounded by other people, who don’t have particular features and are just shadows]

Anyway, we’re following a teenager, Guillaume Kanner (yeah, really) who is “suffering from Wing Syndrome”, which is basically being Neurotypical. He lives in an autistic society, in which he can’t find his place.

In this society, people are wearing five bracelets, each for a sense, and their colors are different regarding their degree of sensitivity. A green bracelet means that everything is okay with this sense, a red one means that they’re hypersensitive and that, if they have a meltdown, it is most likely to be due to this sense being overstimulated.

They have with them a “G.P.S”, an Ipad filled with questions and answers about all kinds of situation (like “What can I do if my child has taken drug and is acting strangely ?” or other stuff like that).

The kids and teenagers are all evaluated yearly to determine their passion(s) and to study it accordingly. And if they don’t, they’re going to a special class called “devoid” to study things here and there until they find their passion.

Guillaume is the only one with a Wing Syndrome that doesn’t have another disability (the other are either mentally ill or physically disabled). He can’t find a “passion” and feels like he’s condemned to a meaningless life. He has been subjected to “cures” when he was young by his parents and he doesn’t want to submit himself to it ever again.

One day, he meets Grace, who is just like him. And he finally starts to believe that his life might not be so bad...

While I found the universe very interesting and that the satire could be on point (for example, instead of saying that “vaccines causes autism”, this time, the absurd theory is that “lacking vaccines in your organism makes you neurotypical”), I think it’s missing a deep thinking on this matter. Something that could have been done if the author had written the book with an autistic person, for example.

The inversion is just that : an inversion. It would be like exchanging men and women’s roles in society and expecting it to be the same. To experience the same micro-agressions, the same discrimination and so on. But it’s more complicated, more subtle than that.

For example, in this universe, people who are mentally ill are locked in an hospital, just like in real life. I don’t think an autistic society would do that. I might be too optimistic, but I think we’ll design society in a way that every disabled people could find their place and utility to allow our society to function.

A lot of us are very practical, as well as empathetic, to even think about treating disabled people that way. It would be inhuman and it would not benefit anyone in any way.

As an autistic reader reading this book, I was uneased by a lot of passages. Most notably, in the beginning, when the parents are learning that their son is Neurotypical and they’re basically saying : “I don’t want my son alive if he’s going to lead this kind of life”. And... again, I don’t think this is how we would react. It’s a very “neurotypical” way of thinking and it doesn’t suit match our personalities.

But there are good things in this book as well, notably the fact that there are different autistic people, that there are good ideas about this possible society (the bracelet stuff, for example. Imagine being able to identify almost immediately what’s causing a meltdown and to know exactly how to help or being helped). 

Also, it helped me to understand some neurotypical behavior (I don’t have a specific example right now, but I know that, while reading, I was like “Oooh, I get it now”).

From a reader’s perspective, I think this book is well-written. The style is simple, but catchy enough to make you want to know the rest of the story. The only problem I have with it is that its ending is way too brutal. I thought I had missed a few pages or something, but no, that was the end. Shame, I didn’t feel like the book really had a conclusion...

Now, for those of you who want to read the story by yourself, you can stop here because I’m going to spoil it a bit. For the others, you can stay !

So, funnily enough... I guessed immediately what was the plot twist of this book. Like, as soon as we met Grace, I knew that she wasn’t neurotypical. I immediately empathize with her character and I was like “Oh, she’s infodumping” or “Oh, she has a special interest”. 

But apparently, it was not obvious at all for the neurotypical readers of this book, who didn’t guessed it until it was explicitly written.