#this was the first time i went with buzzed sides and i'm obsessed

[sharphalo]

haircut ❤️‍🔥

[killergee]

A Small Fascination

Note: Canon divergence. Haven't read the manga, so I'm making up facts. Only spoiler is that kaiju no. 10 gets turned into a suit.

Hoshina x weapons designer reader where she is obsessed with kaiju. Kind of like a hange from aot figure. Or crazy reader x hesitant but supportive Hoshina.

Synopsis: Perceived as untouchable and unapproachable, you didn't care for anything but kaijus. However, Hoshina finally gets you to notice him with the arrival of the body of kaiju no. 10.

Tagslist: @alwaysalilconfused

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You're a weapons designer who's infamous for your cold nature. Your responses were always curt, you never went to social gatherings, and you never stayed long enough in a room for someone to strike up a conversation with you. Because of this, you were known as the defense's icy beauty. Someone everyone could admire from afar but can never touch lest they wanted to feel the chill of your aloof demeanour.

No one knew this better than Hoshina.

He has approached you before, but he felt like you never really saw him. When he talked to you, it felt like you were looking past him. Like you were counting down the seconds until it was socially acceptable to end the conversation and leave. To you, he was probably just another random lackey trying to talk to you.

What made it sting even worse was that he could tell you didn't remember his name at all. No matter how many times he reintroduced himself to you, the next time he saw you, you either avoided referring to him at all or only by his title when you seemed to remember.

So he kept his small fascination with you as it was. A small fascination. Nothing more, nothing less.

The reality of the situation, however, was that you were simply too absorbed in your work. You weren't an ice princess or a tsundere, but simply someone crazy about kaijus.

You would rather spend your time locked up in your lab than anywhere else. Moreover, due to your line of work, you constantly spoke to various people—whether it be other scientists, engineers, or officers—so you gave up on remembering names. The only thing worth remembering were the different kaiju species and information relevant to your experiments and inventions.

Outside of your research, no one had ever caught your eye enough to leave an impression on you.

The day the body of kaiju no. 10 arrived on base, everything changed. Never had Hoshina seen you as happy as you were now. Hell, he's never even seen any emotion on your face other than boredom. You were practically buzzing in your place as they were wheeling the kaiju body into your lab.

Before turning to enter your lab, your eyes met Hoshina's. "You did an excellent job bringing this one in, Hoshina!" You exclaimed, quickly grasping both of his hands and giving them a shake. With a beaming smile, you left Hoshina standing there stunned.

Huh?

Hoshina thought he must've died and gone to heaven because you did not just smile at him and you definetly did not just say his name. It wasn't until he realized he was the only one left standing outside your lab did he snap out of his daze. That blinding smile played in the back of his mind for weeks after.

From then on he started visiting your lab under the guise of checking on your progress.

The first few times, you were so wrapped up in your experimentations that he was only able to stand to the side and watch. But the fourth time he stepped into your lab, your head immediately snapped to his. "Oh, the kaiju talked about you! Said something about how he wanted you to be the one who wears him."

Unprepared for your attention, "ah, really?" Was the only response he could muster.

"I wonder why? What about you makes you so special that the kaiju likes you," you said pensively, stepping into his space. Your hand was under your chin contemplatively while your face peered up at his.

You were finally looking at him like he wanted. Even if that look resembled someone looking at a funky-looking bacteria under a microscope—you were still truly looking at him.

It was better than nothing.

"Hmmm, slightly above average build, average height, above average looks..." You continued your analysis while he choked on his own spit at your last comment. "And yet you were able to defeat the kaiju with just swords... intriguing."

"Well the Captain was the one-"

"Yes, yes, I've seen the report, but you're the one the kaiju credits for this." You finally pulled away, and although Hoshina could finally breathe, the space in front of him felt a little emptier.

"Impressive." He heard you say as you turned around to go back to your desk. He even saw a small smile grace your features for a second.

Huh, maybe this won't stay as a small fascination.

Chasing after that high, he visited your lab again and again and again. You, however, misinterpreted his actions and thought you found someone just as fascinated by kaijus as you were.

"Isn't he beautiful?"

Hoshina threw a confused glance at you as he faced the tank. "...the kaiju?"

"Yes, who else? His exoskeleton that serves as his armour is such a beautiful shade of red. Combined with its insane durability, thi-"

Despite his best attempts to keep up with what you were saying, he couldn't see things the way you did. It was difficult to even try to see things the way you did when you were speaking so quickly and used so much unfamiliar terminology. Still, he thought you looked extra adorable talking so passionately.

He watched you approached the tank, your hand lightly touching the glass. "Oh, when I'm done with you," you said, your voice lowering an octave, "you're going to be the best."

Hoshina shamefully felt a wave of heat flash through his body at your statement. His mind couldn't help but go to a different place with the way you spoke—menacingy and commanding, but with an undertone of something he couldn't exactly place.

He heard the kaiju respond, but he could only focus on you.

"Yeah, yeah, quit yapping. Be nice and quiet for me, will you? Good... Now how do I remove the vocal chords..."

That day, Hoshina thinks he might have discovered something about himself.

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With every visit, Hoshina brought stories of the kaijus he's slain or seen. He enjoyed speaking with you and especially enjoyed how the stories got you to focus on him so earnestly.

You were at your desk, head resting on your hand as you looked at him. "I'm so jealous of you, I wish I could've seen that kaiju in real life."

Hoshina spun the pen in his hand as he listened to you. The report infront of him was only half finished, but he didn't mind the distraction. In fact, he welcomed it.

Spending only his free time with you wasn't enough for him, but he couldn't just drop his duties and laze around in your lab every day. So he moved most of his paperwork to your lab. He actually moved so much of his things that his desk in his office was practically empty. Sometimes, he even finds that he has to go to your lab to grab his things.

For him, it didn't matter if you two chatted or if you simply worked on your separate things in silence. He just liked being close to your presence.

At first, he was scared he was overstepping your boundaries. He knew your lab was your everything, and he didn't want to intrude. It was the place where you would lock yourself for days on end. The space in which you would make a beeline to from the parking lot. The space that was wholly yours, and only yours—a physical extension of you.

But then he noticed how, despite the mess of blueprints and papers scattered on the desk and floor, there was always a clear space on the corner of the desk where he usually sat at. A space that seemed to expand more and more every day to accommodate the things he would bring.

It made his heart warm at the thought that you not only accepted him into your space but also welcomed him in it.

"Can't really say that was a great experience." He responded, flipping to the next page of his report.

"Take a picture for me next time, will you? The drones are not the best when it comes to pictures."

Hoshina smiled, chancing a glance at you. "Heh, all ya have to do is ask, and I'll even bring ya back a piece of it."

"Really?!" You exclaimed excitedly, pushing yourself to his side and clutching his arm.

Hoshina was only joking when he said that. He didn't think you'd actually take him seriously. He didn't even know if he was allowed to do that. He probably wasn't.

"Uh, I don't think-"

"If you could please bring back its eyes! No, actually, it's reproductive organs. That way, I could test it in the lab and record the different stages of their growth. NO WAIT, I want its heart! The heart of a kaiju is so unique from other mamals-" you rambled on, getting lost in your own excitement. The glimmer in your eyes, along with the elation in your voice, made him want to clench his heart at your cuteness.

I guess I'll find a way, hoshina decided with a soft sigh as he dropped his report to focus on your lecture.

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Although he typically reached out to you first, sometimes you surprised him.

"Vice Captain, let me measure you," you announced one day, already taking out the measuring tape as if to say he had no choice but to comply.

He was sitting on your desk chair, foot propped on your desk. Despite feeling a bit nervous, he stood up anyway. "Why do ya need to measure me?"

"Well, since the kaiju wants you to wear it, I thought I'd make sure it fits you perfectly." You said as you approached him.

Motioning for him to raise his arms, you stood only a couple inches away from him. You snaked your hands behind his back, wrapping the measuring tape around to the front of his chest. Your actions were slow and almost intimate as you handled him delicately. It left his skin tingling in excitement and anticipation. Not knowing where to look, he tried to look down at your hands holding the measuring tape together. He quickly snapped his head back up with a blush when he saw a glimpse down your shirt. At the quick movement, the tape shifted in your hands. He thought you'd scold him to stay still or keep his eyes forward. Instead, you surprised him by letting out a low chuckle.

His ears flushed hot at the sound. His blush grew brighter when you dropped to his waist and your hand grazed his lower abdomen. When you walked around him to measure his back, he felt both the slither of the measuring tape and the ghost of your fingertips on his waist.

"Your proportions are phenomenal. A good physique with an ideal body ratio," he listened as your fingers traced along his shoulders. "If the kaiju didn't choose you to wear the suit, then I would've." You said one last time as you put your hands down.

You reached for the notebook on your desk as he hovered beside you, facing the other way. While he rubbed the back of his neck in embarrassment and also in an attempt to calm himself down, a thought occurred to him.

"Wait, doesn't the suit readjust itself to the person wearing it?"

You keep your head down, but your gaze shifts to his. "Oh yeah, it does."

The tone of your voice suggested you forgot, but he knew better as he saw the mischief dancing in your eyes.

That was when he knew he was in too deep. You were so much more than a small fascination, and he was so much more than a little intrigued.

[causenessus]

for your event, can I request suna with ⭐️ and 🍳? :D

Almond Butter. | Suna Rintarou

suna x f!reader

written in 2nd pov and it tore me to shreds

prompts from 1k followers event -> ⭐ -> insomnia & 🍳 -> cooking

"you've adored me before, oh my good looking boy." from good looking (stripped) by suki waterhouse

word count: 1.1k words

notes: fluff <333 i can't help talking about how hot and sexy this man is everytime i write for him i am so in love with him i am barking from him HHHHH— suna being a good boyfriend and brother!!! i love this man to bits and pieces <3 1K WRITING EVENT IS BACK IN SESSION!!! AND SO AM I!! NESS!! FOR A SINGLE DAY!! WITH CRAPPY WRITING!! i'm obsessed with him and him only using petnames and also i see this as a scenario being quite early into your relationship with him <3 and basically this being the first time he says "i love you" to you (without realizing it) and you realizing you love him (and being too sleepy to say it)(this makes more sense once you read the drabble)

mango anon, if you see this <3 this is us <3 this is me making u almond butter toast <3

cw: food, talk about food chemistry and how your brain converts food to melatonin using carbs yay science! work is not exactly proofread

you’ve been waiting in your living room for the past 10 minutes.

well, actually, you’ve been waiting for the past two hours to go to sleep but your brain won't let you, no matter how tired you feel.

finally giving up any chance of falling asleep soon in your bed, you let the screen of your phone blind you as you shoot a quick text to your boyfriend:

y/n : taro are you awake? i can’t sleep :( insomnia’s kicking my ass again

you collapse back onto your pillow, throwing your phone haphazardly to your side with a groan. almost immediately, your head pops back up again at the sound of a buzz, and you blindly reach for your phone, looking at its screen.

rin <3 : yeah i am

rin <3 : give me 10 min

you weren’t entirely sure what he had meant by that; if he was busy, and would reply again in 10 minutes or if he was coming over.

you hoped it was the latter, but you'd find out soon enough. in the meantime, you moved to your living room, curled up on your couch under a heavy blanket, dimly lit by the warm light of a nearby lamp as you watched the seconds go by on your phone.

you always slept better with him, whether he was holding you in his arms or he was just simply in the room with you, it felt nice to be in his presence. just the thought of him was slowly making your eyes start to droop before the sound of the door unlocking made you perk up.

there he was, gently swinging your door open, a white plastic bag in hand. his yellow eyes fell on you as you looked him up and down, obviously judging his poor taste in clothing (sweats and a t-shirt) despite it being the middle of winter.

“hi baby,” he whispers, kicking off his shoes before immediately making a beeline towards you. you were peeking out from over the arm of your couch, and he knelt on the floor at the side of the couch, chin propped against the arm of it where you were, leaning in towards your face. there was a smile on his own as he spoke, “don’t fall asleep now, i just got here.”

you can only sigh quietly in response, happy to finally see him. “can’t help it,” you mumble, “‘was thinking of you.”

his smile only grows at your words, and he presses a chaste kiss to your forehead, letting a hand run down the side of your face, caressing it carefully. “you’re cute when you’re tired, doll,” he teases as you lean into his touch, too tired to even respond. “at least let me take care of you before you fall asleep though, yeah? i went to the store for you after all.”

“you didn’t have to buy me anything,” you whisper, reaching an arm out to him, trying to get him to join you on the couch.

he grabs your hand, rubbing a thumb lovingly over the back of it, but doesn’t let you pull him down, “of course i’ll buy you things, y/n. i love you. can i make you something to eat?”

you hum in thought, thinking about if you really want to allow him to move you, but when he tugs gently at your arm, you get up (begrudgingly) bringing your blanket with you to the kitchen.

you rest your arms on the counter you’re sitting at, lazily watching his figure move through your kitchen, pulling items out of his bag. “what’re you doing?” you eventually question, eyeing his selection of groceries with confusion. the jug of milk you can understand, but not the jar of what you assume to be jam and a nut butter.

“‘making you toast,” he answers, rummaging through your drawers for a knife, “my sister used to have trouble sleeping sometimes too, and she’d always wake me up instead of our mom so i had to figure out what helped.”

“and peanut butter and jelly sandwiches are supposed to help you fall asleep?” you ask, sitting up to rest your head on your hand as you watch him pull a plate from your cupboard.

the bread he dropped into your toaster pops back up as he corrects you, “almond butter. my sister hates peanut butter, and rightfully so. almonds are better.” he continues talking as he places the toasted bread on the plate he grabbed, “i had to google what kind of foods you should eat when you can’t sleep and it’s the first suggestion i saw. the almonds have something in them that gets converted to melatonin using the carbs from the bread and jam, or something like that.”

you nod along like you really care about whatever science he’s rambling about when really, all you can pay attention to is how nice his voice is. ever since he entered your apartment, you’ve realized how much he was all you needed to sleep. you’re slowly getting more attached to him and the longer you date him, the more sure you are that you love him, too.

he slips into the seat next to you, sliding the plate of toast over to you. you mumble a small thanks, biting into the sandwich before opting to lean against him, your head resting on his shoulder while the rest of your body is wrapped in the heavy blanket you brought from your couch.

you hum in satisfaction, deciding that maybe rintarou was right about whatever science is behind the contents of this sandwich, or maybe he just needs to research the effect he has on you. you’re sure just being in his presence is sending melatonin straight to your brain–or however he said that works. “rin,” you hum, eyes closed as you remain leaning against him.

“what is it, sweetheart?” he asks. one of his arms has moved to wrap around your back, holding you close while one of his fingers grazes the skin of your arm, drawing lazy circles onto it.

“will you stay the night, too?” you ask, taking another bite of the sandwich.

he can’t help but smile, watching you snuggle up against him, scooting your chair and plate closer to him, closing the gap between you two. “of course, love, if that’s what you want,” he whispers, pressing a kiss into your hair.

you nod in response to the statement, holding up your sandwich to his mouth for him to take a bite of. “you're good at making sandwiches, but i think all i need is you to fall asleep,” you mumble tiredly and he chuckles.

“if you fall asleep here, i’ll have to carry you to your bed, you know,” he warns, but you're already drifting in and out of sleep, the plate on the table in front of you both now empty, besides a few crumbs of bread.

“that’s okay,” you try to say, fighting a losing battle against the sleep that's slowly overtaking you. “you can do it,” your last words of encouragement make his heart twist before your head lolls slightly, and he knows you’ve knocked out.

taglist: @akaakeis @wyrcan @daisy-room @eggyrocks @cheriisae @alexithemiyatic @kameyyy @iiwaijime @chaotic-neutral-ig @bakery-anon @kakeru-eem

[ro-is-struggling]

Dark Side of Me || Bucky Barnes x Reader

Summary: The plan you and your friends had come up with to celebrate your 21st birthday was simple: go to as many bars as you could in one night and stay out of the hospital. You weren't a big fan of it, but everyone had done it and now it was your turn. However, things went off the rails quickly and you ended up being dragged to Heroes, a superhero-themed strip club. You thought it was a bad idea, until you met the cold, piercing blue eyes of the Winter Soldier and simply couldn't look away.

Or the one when reader gets her first lap dance

Warnings: stripper AU, stripper!bucky x innocent!reader, suggestive tones, lap dance (I tried really hard), no actual smut, alcohol consumption, reader giving in to peer pressure, fem reader

English is not my first language

Word count: 4400

Notes: I watched magic mike the other day and apparently I am now obsessed with stripper aus. The movies have a softer side that I wasn't expecting but I loved it and that's the vibe I'm trying to recreate here. If you want to understand some of the dance moves I'm trying to describe here you should watch the movie! I tried really hard with this one (describing dancing is waay harder than I thought so I hope it makes sense)

I’m open to writing more of these two, so let me know if you’d like that and don't hesitate to stop by my asks/messages if you have any ideas!

tagging: @asgards-princess-of-mischief

What had started out as a night of celebrating your 21st birthday quickly went off the rails and turned into something completely different. The plan was to get wasted —legally this time—, visit a couple of bars and get home before you ended up in the hospital. You weren't usually a party and alcohol lover —you just went to have a good time with your friends—, but you recognized that your 21st birthday was an important event that deserved to be celebrated. Besides, your friends had assured you that they would behave themselves and that things would not get out of control -well, not that much at least.

In hindsight, you should have figured that wouldn't happen. Although nothing could have prepared you for ending up at Heroes, a strip club your friends had apparently been to before. You tried to say no at first, but you were a little buzzed and you'd never been good at saying no to your friends anyway, so eventually you agreed. The place was exactly what you imagined and completely different at the same time, if that made sense. Dark, loud and warm, but much nicer than you expected. The dim lights gave it a very intimate feel, highlighting certain spaces with red or purple lights that made it look aesthetically pleasing to the eye. The music played loudly, trying to drown out some of the shouting of the women throwing bills onto the catwalk where the dancers performed their routines, but it wasn't anything you couldn't handle.

From the moment you settled at your table, a sort of strange sisterhood was generated between you and the groups of women seated in your proximity. Similar to bumping into a stranger in the bathroom at a party and reacting as if you were lifelong friends, you quickly engaged in casual conversation with the group of women at a bachelorette party to your right, and the one celebrating a divorce to your left. You complimented each other's outfits, shared a few drinks, and screamed with all your might in unison every time a dancer approached your side of the stage —or made quick eye contact with one of you. It created such a pleasant and fun atmosphere that for a moment you almost forgot where you were.

It stopped being nice and fun though when your friend came up with the idea of paying for a private dance and you had to face the force of a group of women pressuring you to accept. You had made the silly mistake of letting one of your friends know that you really thought the dancer who called himself the Winter Soldier was cute. You hadn't been able to take your eyes off him during his routine. And since that was the most interested you had ever been in any of the dancers, your friend thought it would be a good idea to treat you to a private dance.

“What am I supposed to do locked in a room with him?” You panicked as your friends dragged you to a more private area of the club to wait for your gift.

“I don't know, enjoy, I guess?” She laughed, practically pushing you into the arms of the man waiting to lead you to the Winter Soldier. You wanted to snap at her, but you kept silent, embarrassed by the stranger's presence. The last thing you needed was to make an even bigger fool of yourself by looking like an innocent, prudish fool.

But the problem was just that. You were a silly, innocent, prudish young woman that didn't have the slightest idea of what to do in a situation like that. You could feel the sound of your heartbeat pounding in your ears, drowning out the screaming and the bass of the music that was getting farther and farther away. Your stomach was turning with nerves as you sat waiting in the chair in the center of the room, just as the man had indicated before disappearing behind the door. Your hands rested awkwardly in your lap, your body immobile as you contemplated your options —perhaps if you remained completely still, he wouldn't be able to see you there, it was dark after all. 

You thought about running away from there. You were alone, the dancer had not yet appeared and the hallway was dark, you would probably be able to sneak out without even your friends noticing. You would send them a text later explaining everything, when you were out and away from their clutches so they couldn't drag you there again. But when you went to get up, you found that your legs didn't respond. Only this time it didn't feel like it was part of the nerves you were having at the thought of what was about to happen. 

You discovered then that a part of you, hidden behind a lot of shame and fear of the unknown, was curious. You wondered what it would feel like to be in a room alone with him, what it would feel like to have him touch you —even in the lightest, most subtle way—, to have him press his body against yours as he had done on stage with a lucky girl in the audience. You'd never experienced anything remotely similar to that, you'd barely shared make-out sessions with your ex-partner that weren't particularly memorable-not in the way the Winter Soldier's dance was for you. You had the movement of his hips burned into your memory, the image of his flexing muscles popping up every time you closed your eyes. You wanted more of him, even if you couldn't bring yourself to admit it. 

The sensual rhythm of the music that suddenly began to play brought you out of your thoughts. You looked up and there he was in all his glory. He was wearing a different outfit, a simple tank top and loose-fitting sweatpants. The tactical suit and mask that covered half his face in his routine had probably been left forgotten in some basket behind the stage, but you didn't mind. You could see more of him now, the real him, and you liked that. It felt more intimate, more genuine.

He could sense the nervousness in your voice when you told him your name. You had trouble maintaining eye contact with him, your eyes lingering for a full three seconds on his figure before returning to your hands. Your fingers fiddled with the hem of your flowy dress. It intrigued him. He had worked with flustered women before —it was more common than one might imagine—, but there was something about you that stood out. You looked so out of place there, with your innocent look and shaky breath. Everything about your body expression told him that you wanted to curl up in a ball and pretend you weren't there. Everything except a slight glint in your eyes that he almost missed as quickly as you looked away from him. It would be his challenge to get that side of you to come out. 

“That's a beautiful name,” he said in a soft voice. You smiled, but your eyes didn't search his, focusing instead on the red light shining on the wall behind him. So he leaned in front of you, settling down to your eye level so you couldn't escape. “I'm Bucky, by the way, and there's no reason to be nervous around me, princess.” 

Your face warmed at that affectionate nickname and a tingle spread through your body. It had been a while since the last time someone had called you that. You liked it, it made you feel special even if it came from a stranger's mouth.

“Why did you come here tonight? You don't seem like the type of woman that frequents these places.”

“I'm not! I'm here because my friends thought it'd be a good idea... a fun way of celebrating my 21st birthday.” 

“Oh well happy birthday then!” Bucky gave you a smile and you thought that was the best present you had received all day. “Are you having a good time?

“Yea-yeah, I am.” Your voice was soft, almost inaudible. Bucky got the impression that you were embarrassed to admit that out loud.

“Are you uncomfortable, y/n? Do you want to leave? Cause I can give you a full refund and let you go right now if that's what you want.”

“No!” you were quick to say, big eyes staring at him for the first time since he had introduced himself to you. “I'm just a bit... scared, I guess. I've never done anything like this before. Actually, I've never done anything for that matter.” 

You didn't know what prompted you to confess to Bucky —a complete stranger who danced and stripped for a living— your complete inexperience in sexual matters, but you couldn't turn back now. You supposed it was to be transparent, though there was no reason for such a thing. It wasn't like you were there to have sex, he was just going to dance on you for a bit and then you'd go back to your normal, boring life. 

“Well, then I have to let you know that you are in full control here.” Bucky spoke in a soft tone full of understanding. His cold, piercing blue eyes softened, showing a warmth that helped calm your nerves a bit. “I do have a routine, but if there's something that I do that you don't like you can just tell me and I'll stop, okay?” You nodded, biting your lip as you felt the tingle of anticipation running through your body. “Good! Are you ready?”

At your nod, Bucky got up from the floor to press play on the music. Suddenly, the silence was filled by a soft, sensual beat similar to others that had echoed through the club throughout the night. He approached you with a slow pace, his eyes never leaving your face, studying your expression. Then he took one of your hands in his and rested it on his chest, still covered by the thin fabric of his white muscle shirt. You couldn't help but notice how much bigger his hands were compared to yours. You could barely see your fingertips as he wrapped his hand around yours, trapping it against his chest. His calloused fingers didn't let go as he slowly guided your hand down, allowing you to caress his chest as he rubbed small circles over your skin. It was such an intimate touch for the situation you were in, that for a moment you forgot he was a stripper who did this for a living.

The air caught in your throat, your heart pounding against your chest as your hand traveled lower and lower. You could feel the firmness of his abs under your fingers and the heat emanating from his skin. It filled you with anticipation, with need. You wanted to feel more of him, more of his body and his touch. More of his warmth and the intoxicating scent of his cologne. But before your hand reached his waist, he pulled it away. Your eyes shot up to his face, waiting patiently for Bucky to give you instructions to proceed.

He removed his shirt and as soon as the fabric touched the floor, his hands were on yours again, trapping them against his chest. Bucky liked the way you let him guide you, closing your eyes as you enjoyed something as simple as the feel of his skin under your fingers. He was used to dealing with more... confident women. They knew what they wanted and weren't afraid to demand it. Their hands were always everywhere, touching his crotch without hesitation every chance they got. But you were different. You didn't know what you wanted —what you were missing— and you were willing to let him show you. He enjoyed the slower pace, it was a nice change that allowed him to try new things. So in a way, you were both experiencing something different there.

Your eyes suddenly widened as you felt the fabric of Bucky's sweatpants brush against your fingers. Your face heated up, embarrassment taking over your expression. But he didn't let your hand slip away, on the contrary, he pushed it a few inches lower and made you cling to the elastic of the pants. He gave you a cheeky smile before he started moving to the rhythm of the music. His hand didn't let go of yours as he positioned himself in your lap, grinding his hips against yours with an experience that shouldn't have surprised you. 

Bucky fixed his eyes on you as he danced, keeping you in a kind of hypnotic trance from which you could not wake up. Your eyes followed his, your body responding to his movements without a single complaint. He trapped you between the chair and his body, one of his hands clinging firmly to the back of the chair while the other traveled to your cheek. You leaned into his touch, enjoying the warm caress of his fingers. His face came so close to yours that you could feel his breath mingling against your quickened breathing, his nose brushing against yours. For a moment you thought he was going to kiss you, so you closed your eyes, letting the euphoric sensation of desire consume you. 

But suddenly, Bucky rose from your lap. You couldn't contain the whimper that escaped your lips, a protest at his devastating absence. Although he wasn't completely gone, you could feel him at your back, his hands caressing your neck, his nose inhaling the scent of your hair. The ghost of his lips traveling from the sweet spot behind your ear to your collarbone, leaving a trail of fire in their wake. He wasn't even kissing you and you were already experiencing things you had never felt before in your years of relationship.

With a graceful and sensual move, Bucky is once again on your lap, trapping you against the chair. He wasn't putting his full weight on you, but enough for you to feel it as he moved his hips. Your eyes traveled south, curious about the bulge that the sweat pants still hid. You'd never seen one before — well, outside of biology and health classes— and you'd never felt the urge to do so. But the way Bucky was moving on you made you wonder about things. You heard him let out a chuckle and looked away in embarrassment, knowing you'd been caught.

“You can look,” Bucky whispered in your ear, sending shivers down your spine. “That's what I'm here for, doll.” He stroked your arms, his fingers traveling slowly from your shoulders to your wrists. Then he took your hands and placed them back on his bare chest. “You can touch too, I don't mind.”

The desire traveling through your veins made you feel more confident this time, so you didn't need Bucky to guide your hands down his body. They acted at their own accord, fingers slowly tracing the defined muscles of his pecs and abs. You weren't yet comfortable going below his hips, so once you reached the edge of his pants you changed course to his back. Down, up and back down, your nails drew light red marks on his skin as he moved in your lap. You didn't even realize what you were doing, you just knew you liked hearing the sounds that escaped Bucky's lips when you accidentally applied too much pressure. 

The lowest your trembling hands dared to go were his thighs. Bucky could see in your eyes the desire to go further —to brush your fingers over his bulge or squeeze his ass—, but shame and fear stopped you. You were trying so hard to keep your composure, to behave like a lady, but you couldn't fool Bucky. He knew what you wanted, even when you weren't ready to admit it. He saw it in the way your eyes darkened with each passing second and in the way your breathing became more and more erratic. The innocent, good girl shell you had when you entered the room was cracking, allowing your dark desires to come out. Bucky probably shouldn't find that so exciting, but he did. He couldn't help it, watching the innocence slowly leave your eyes, knowing that he was the one corrupting you, was a sight to behold. 

Your lips curled into a pout of protest as Bucky rose from your lap, already missing the heat of his body pressed against yours. It was only for a moment, but to you it felt like an eternity. And he was counting on it, playing with the anticipation as he made a show of taking off his pants. This time your eyes lingered on his tight boxers for longer, though he could still see a flash of embarrassment as you crossed glances with him. It was driving him crazy, in the best possible way. He wanted to remove that innocence from your expression, to corrupt you past the point of no return. It was his personal goal, the challenge he had quietly accepted the moment he discovered what you were. And he was willing to win it.

Bucky dropped to his knees in front of you, his eyes never leaving yours as his fingers traced your legs. Your chest rose and fell with your quickening breath, your whole body buzzing with anticipation as you felt the gentle caresses moving from your ankles to your knees. To your surprise, his fingers continued their path up your thighs, though they stopped just below the hem of your dress. You resisted the urge to tangle your fingers in his hair as you felt him spread your legs slightly apart —enough for him to fit between them, but not enough to leave you too exposed to his eyes. And then the caresses over your body returned, only this time it was the ghost of Bucky's lips that sent shivers across your skin.

His mouth wasn't actually touching your thighs, but he was so damn close that you could almost feel his lips caressing the soft, sensitive skin on the inside of your leg. A warm tingling spread inside you as he moved further up, getting dangerously close to your trembling center. And at that moment you felt no shame or fear —like you had felt on other occasions with past partners. On the contrary, you wanted more, your legs involuntarily spreading wider to give Bucky more room as the ghost of his lips traveled up your lower tummy and across your abdomen until they reached your breasts. And as your breathy moans became more and more audible, your mind was lost in dark thoughts, wondering how different it would all feel if there was no barrier of clothing separating your bodies or how his wet kisses would feel on the sensitive skin of your thighs. 

You didn't have much time to get lost in the fantasy though because in a second Bucky was on his feet again, pressing you against the back of the chair as he pushed your legs up. He settled down on the edge of the chair, resting each of your legs on his thighs. His hands gripped the back of the chair once again, trapping you completely between the cushions and his body —or rather, his crotch. You were practically sitting on his lap as you shared the chair, and you could feel his cock pressing against your center with every thrust of his hips. He was hard and you didn't know how common that was, but you decided to believe it wasn't something that happened often. You liked to imagine that his body was reacting to you and not to the sexual nature of his work. He wanted you just as much as you wanted him.

Bucky's hips moved to the sensual rhythm of the music, thrusting against your center in a way that made you feel like you were losing your virginity at that very moment. It was too much, the fire inside you spreading with the speed of a forest fire. And at the same time, it wasn't enough. Bucky's hip movements, though intense, did little to put out the flames they had started. They were pulling you into a swirl of desire and need, bringing you closer and closer to your limit with no promise of real relief. It was frustrating, in a way, but also incredibly exciting. 

Your eyes closed for a moment as you struggled to process the sensations that were taking over your body. You tried to focus on your breathing and the sound of the music, anything to keep yourself grounded. But every time you thought you had managed to gain control of your own body again, Bucky moved his hips and all you could feel was pleasure, all you could think about was him. 

A moan escaped your lips. It was involuntary and you didn't even realize what you did until a few seconds later. You were ready to apologize, certain you had crossed some kind of line, but Bucky let out a grunt of approval. One of his hands traveled to the back of your neck, holding your head firmly as he pressed his forehead against yours. His fingers tugged on your hair lightly, but the pain didn't bother you. You were too focused on the shape of his lips to think about anything else. You needed to feel them against yours. You needed to know what it would feel like to be kissed by him. You needed Bucky to take everything from you, to show you everything you'd been missing in these years of loneliness.

“C-can you k-kiss me?” You didn't think before you spoke, you just expressed what your mind was thinking without any kind of filter. Your voice was barely a shy whisper, your lips almost brushing against Bucky's as you spoke.

He should have refused, the number one rule of his job was never to kiss the clients —you never knew what things you might end up catching. But when Bucky saw the desperation in your eyes he couldn't help himself. Your slightly parted lips were highly tempting. You were inviting him, giving him permission to ruin you. You needed it as much as he did, so he gave in, and damned the rules. 

Bucky's lips felt soft against yours, though there was nothing soft about the way he kissed you. Just like his dancing, the kiss was intense and unlike anything you had ever experienced before. His lips moved expertly, knowing exactly what to do to turn you completely stupid. You let him guide you, merely reacting to the pleasure that only Bucky seemed capable of giving you. 

His tongue caressed your lips and you moaned into his mouth, allowing him immediate access to further deepen the kiss. Your hands clung to him —one digging your nails into his bicep while the other rested on his leg—, desperate to find something to keep you grounded while Bucky showed you sensations you didn't know you were capable of feeling. 

You were high on pleasure, trapped under his body, immobilized by his lips, enveloped in his warmth and the scent of his cologne. You didn't want to be separated from him anymore. You didn't want to leave that room. You felt as if Bucky's lips were what kept you breathing, as if you needed them to keep on living. You couldn't pull away. You didn't want to pull away. But unfortunately a knock on the door signaled that your time together was over. 

“You're more than welcome to come back anytime.” Bucky winked at you before disappearing behind the door, leaving you alone in the room. 

It took you a moment to collect your thoughts and calm your rapid breathing. Your heartbeat was still pounding in your ears, but you figured that would change when you had a chance to get some fresh air. Your legs almost gave out when you stood up, still weak in the knees after the spectacle you had witnessed. You felt a little silly having to take a moment to steady yourself. Bucky had gotten up and left without any trouble, and there you were, clinging to the back of the chair as you struggled to compose yourself so you could leave without your friends realizing the effect their dumb idea had really had on you. You were pathetic. 

Gathering your last bit of strength you pushed past the screaming women until you found your friends. They were back at their table, enjoying the routine of a tall, muscular blond who, from what you had heard, called himself Captain America. He was cute, but you couldn't stay in that place a second longer.

“How was it?” one of your friends asked with a smile.

“I need to get some air.”

“That good, huh?” Said the other with a giggle. You rolled your eyes, grabbing both of them by the arm and pulling them up from their seats. 

Amidst protests they agreed to leave with you and call it a night. As they made their way through the crowd they didn't miss the opportunity to flood you with questions, insisting that you give them details of what had happened and how it felt to have Bucky dance just for you. You refused to say anything, partly because you were embarrassed to admit the reality of what had happened, and partly because you still needed time to process the night. 

However, as you were about to leave, one of the waiters who had served your table - a young man who had introduced himself as Spider-Man - grabbed your arm. At first you thought maybe you had forgotten something in your seats and he was being kind enough to catch you before you left. But when you turned to look at him you noticed he had nothing in his hands but a rose and a piece of paper.

“He sends you this.” The boy said, handing you the items and disappearing into the crowd. 

He didn't have to tell you who they were from for you to know. A smile immediately graced your lips as you held the flower to your nose and inhaled. Then you turned your attention to the piece of paper and as you unfolded it you discovered that it was a note.

‘Happy birthday!

Call me ;)' 

It read, and at the end was written a phone number that was undoubtedly Bucky's. Your smile widened, which finally attracted the attention of your friends. One of them took the paper from you before you could hide it and when you saw the expression on her face you knew you weren't going to escape the interrogation. It was going to be a long night.

[neesieiumz]

brontide || ──────── r. braun.

day three - SPITTING / HUMILIATION / EXHIBITIONISM

『 synopsis 』 ⸻ a night with your friends gets you into way more trouble that you're looking for.

『 warnings 』 ⸻ mafia!au. mafia-boss!reiner. the mafia part is implied but not explicitly mentioned. he also owns a sex club. sm*t. minors do not interact. humiliation. exhibitionism. spitting. emotionally-abusive ex-boyfriend. who happens to be floch. and who also happens to be in prison for five years. he calls you sweetie/sweetness. he's been obsessed with you the moment he saw you and sent your ex to jail so he can have you. one of reader's friends are also a part of the mafia and basically escort her to go to the club so she can get snatched up.

『 writers notes 』 ⸻ first day of kinktober! been planning this since august and I'm gonna finish it! By god's grace, of course!

『 word count 』 ⸻ 6.4k words

masterlist. next part in kinktober.

Laughter echoed into the night, and the entire group huddled together ambled alongside the wet sidewalk. Your arms were hooked around the arms of your friends, walking in sync with them as the rest of your friends followed behind you all. The air smelled fresh, of wet petricor and tar, evidence of the recent rain that fell over the city. You felt light as if your head could fall off your shoulders, the slight buzz from the round of margaritas you all had during your dinner together. The original plan was to continue the party at your favorite club, but you found the line to be too long and it was slowly ruining your buzz. So now you were walking through the town, hoping to find something to continue the fun you’ve had tonight. 

Before, you’d never thought you’d be out like this, with friends, wearing short dresses and a huge smile on your face. Seven months ago, you were a whole different person, quiet, frightened, and controlled by your ex-boyfriend. However, miracles could come in the newest forms as he suddenly found himself thrown into prison, which inadvertently caused your freedom. Ever since then, you found yourself living more and more free, living more and more for yourself. You packed up most of your things, sold what you could of his things, and moved cities and jobs, finding a career or even higher pay. With your ex-boyfriend out of the way, as well as removing him from everything you could, it helped that he was in prison, and it made everything in your life in order.

“You know,” you felt one of your friends whisper into your ear, “I’m glad you could come out with us tonight.”

You had met her not too long ago, the two of you running into each other while you were in the middle of running errands. Since then, you’ve assimilated yourself into her friend group and all of you are becoming really close, really soon. However, swamped with work, at your new job, you hadn't had a chance to step out and have a fun night off with your new friends, who were all pushing for the time with you, especially since you told them about your ex-boyfriend. Learning about how before he went to prison for robbery, and how  he kept you isolated from your friends, family and controlled your money

You smiled at her, lifting your hand up to brush a few of your braids that were blowing in your face, “I’m glad I finally found the time to come out.”

She smiled at you, glancing down at your dress, “and I see the choice of dress you wore. Isn’t this the one I had to convince you to buy on one of our shopping trips.”

The dress was black and short, with a long slit going up the side, with thin straps holding it. On the slit, connecting the two pieces of fabric were multiple bedazzled thin pieces of fabric. It was different from what you would usually wear, but as you glanced down at it, from the fabric to the low-plunging neckline, it held a certain freedom that you hadn’t felt in a long time. The two of you gave each other a smile, as the entire group approached the newest location, a club that had opened up recently. It was brought up by Michael, who was your friend’s boyfriend, and mostly everyone agreed to finish the night out there after dinner. The name of the club was plaster at the top, glowering in a pure white. The rest of it was covering dark red LED tassels, it was opulent in nature, and the towering building had your heart clenching for a moment. You lowered your head, now gazing at the very long line peeking out the door. 

“That line seems… long,” you mumbled, as you all got closer and closer. 

Your friend glanced over to you, squeezing your arm, “no worries, Michael knows people, he’ll get us in.”

“Tessa!” 

The two of you turned to see Michael waving at her, gesturing for her to come to the front. You were about to let go of her arm, but instead, she held onto it tighter, taking you along with her. The rest of the group made way for the two of you as you all reached the doorway. You could hear the jeers of the rest of the line, seeing your entire group waiting at the entrance skipping the rest of the line. You stood right before the bouncers guarding the door. They were huge, wearing tight, black shirts and heavy cargo pants. They held tablets in their hands as they glowered down at you all. 

“We’re ummm…” Michael started, “we’re friends of the owner. He should already be expecting us.”

The bouncer glanced between the group before his eyes landed right on you. His hard stare caused you to slightly flinch, but Tessa’s grip on you only held tighter, keeping you in place. Your heart pounding away in your chest, you saw the bouncer glance down at the tablet before looking right back at you, before turning towards his coworker. The two of them whispered for a moment, and then the coworker picked up his small radio before entering into the dark nightclub. 

“Come in.” is all the bouncer said, before moving out of the way.

You glanced around at the group but you had no time as you were pulled into the building and into the dark space. Inside, it was dark, you almost couldn’t see ahead of you if it wasn't for the white strobe lights constantly moving and flashing around the room. The music was dark, with a huge bass boom, you couldn't feel your own heart beating. You pressed your hand against your chest, hoping for a reminder that you were still alive. Before you knew it, the group broke up all going in different directions, you could barely see where the rest of them went. You could feel Tessa’s arm pulling you away, past all the ladies standing and moving about it.

Before you could even think, you were standing against the bar table, your mind barely getting used to the loud music, and the constant movement all around you. The bar table was the only thing with consistent lighting, with low back wall lights, lighting up the different stacks of liquor, as well as low-hanging black lights as well, causing you to see the working bartenders making different orders. You glanced over to your left, hoping to see Tessa or some form of her standing right beside you but you couldn't. If you held your hand out in front of you, you probably wouldn't be able to see any of your fingers. You let out a shaky breath, soon realizing you couldn't hear yourself breathing. You glanced around you once more, not able to find any semblance of your friends anywhere around you. You felt weird, out of place even, you didn't know where to go. You turned your head around once more, taking note of everything around you. At the same time, an empty stool opened up, allowing you to sit down and rest your feet. You were still looking around, but still, all you could see was the strobing light, now a mixture of blue and gray, and the crowd of bodies.

Suddenly a hand tapped on the one hand you had placed on the counter, causing your already jittery body to jump, your body flying right back around, facing the bar counter. In front of you stood the bartender, with short, blonde hair, and a white towel laid across his left shoulder. He wore the same uniform as the bouncer, with a black shirt and you could see the hems of the heavy cargo pants. 

He stepped back a moment, his hands in the air as he took note of your jumpy attitude, “sorry, didn’t mean to scare you.”

You shook your head, “sorry, I’m just a little jumpy, it’s my first time in a place like this.” You yelled over the loud music, leaning over the counter.

He smirked at you, “Well, I’m sure you’ll have a good time.” That's all he said before sliding you over a tall martini glass. 

It was filled to the brim with brown liquor, with a little bit of foam brimming at the top of it. You tilted your head at you, a questioning look on your face. 

“I don’t… I don’t remember ordering anything.”

The man shrugged, “it’s on the house, for you know… your first night here.”

That was the last thing he said to you before walking away, before tending to others sitting at the bar. You looked at him as he walked away before facing the glass one more. Slowly, you reached over to the counter, picking up the glass by the stem before bringing it over to you. You brought it up to your nose, taking a whiff of the cocktail. You could smell the slow-churned liquor, strong and expensive in smell. You glanced at it one last time, before taking a sip, the smooth mixture sliding down your throat easily. A slow, warm tingle rose up within you as you took another sip. Stepping away from the bar, slowly immersing yourself in the crowd. The crowd was moving all around, dancing in waves and into each other. You stood around, looking into the crowd of dancing people, seeing if you could find your friends anywhere, mixed in with the crowd. 

With nothing, you decided to move on, sipping on your glass as you slowly stepped around the perimeter of the club. You could feel eyes on you, prickly-like needles poking and prodding at your spine. Turning around with swiftness, you found yourself glancing up at what seemed to be the second floor, seeing people standing about up there. There was some level of privacy, with only semi-opaque windows showing off what seemed to be a private party. Your eyes glanced over from the railing of the second floor, your eyes guided to what seems to be a stairwell, located not too far from you. You could see two bouncers standing there, with a velvet rope keeping the general populous away from what seemed to be a more private crowd. 

“Hey!”

You gasped, feeling something cold prodding at you as you turned around, seeing the friend you walked into standing right behind you, her boyfriend not too far from her.

“Hey, I was looking for you!” you yelled over the music, taking another sip of your drink.

She smiled at you, giggling and crashing into you, most likely unstable from however much she drank, “sorry, me and Michael got lost in the crowd and we ended up joining someone’s randoms section! You should join us!”

The moment she said that Michael, the boyfriend, came up to her, pulling her away, whispering something in her ear. Your friend’s joyful expression soon faded, the two of them delving into whispered arguments, furrowed expressions on both of them now. Not wanting to get in between them, your eyes soon wandered towards the stairwell again. Two people, a couple, soon stepped up to the bouncers standing there, exchanging words between them. The bouncer glanced down at his tablet, much like the ones in front of the club, and scrolled through it, before nodding at his partner, who unlocked the velvet rope, allowing the man and woman to enter and soon walk up the stairwell to the more private party. 

“You curious?”

You jumped for the third time that night, your head whisking to the right, before seeing a tall figure standing over you. The first thing you notice about him is his olive green eyes, it was like they shined within the strobe lights. He had long dark hair, which you could tell was pulled back in some kind of bun. You couldn’t help but glance down further, seeing him wear a suit, his hands tucked into his pockets. He tilted his head, before the two of you turned your heads at the same time, staring at the stairwell. 

You shrugged your shoulders, “I guess I am, why? What’s up there?”

He mused, “can’t tell you that, but I can get you in, if you’d like?”

You narrowed your eyes on him, “why should I trust you? I don’t even know your name, and why would you do this for me?”

He shrugged his shoulders, “feel like being nice for a very pretty lady, think of it as my act of kindness of the day.”

He pressed his hands around your waist, before guiding you towards the stairs. At this point the thought of your friend and her boyfriend flying out of your mind as you headed closer and closer to the flight of stairs. Your mind racing with a never-ending stream of thoughts, and your heart pounding away at your chest, you honestly had no idea what you were doing. You took a final sip of your martini, just as you stood with the man in front of the bouncers. 

The two workers took one look at the man, not even bothering to look at the tablet before the one handling the velvet rope unhooked it immediately, allowing the two of you to pass. 

“Enjoy your time, Mr. Jaeger, Mr. Braun is sure to be expecting you.”

Braun…?

That name was familiar to you, you had no idea how, but you heard it before. However, before you could dwell on it, your escort, denoted as “Mr. Jaeger”, pressed his hands into you, guiding you up the stairs. You took one last moment, hoping to catch a glimpse of your friend, but you could no longer see her standing where she was last left, and neither could you see her boyfriend either. You shrugged the thought off, remembering the short conversation with her about joining someone else within the club. The sounds of the club became more muffled the more and more you climbed above them. Mr. Jaeger took his time to take you towards the more privatized area. You saw an empty table, glancing down at your glass before placing it on there, hoping someone would pick it up. 

The door to the area wasn’t covered by bouncers, but it was hidden from where the general population could see the few viewings of whatever was going on within the room. Jaeger is what you’ll call him until you can learn his real name, open the door, gesturing for you to walk inside first.

It was much like the crowd downstairs, but smaller, and with fewer strobe lights. It looked to be a private party taking place. You could tell by the banner that hung up in which you could vaguely make out the words “Happy Birthday.” Everyone was up in a ball in the middle of the floor having the times of their lives, with people scattered about as well. You ignored the white powder on some people’s tables as you maneuvered yourself through the standing people. 

Before you knew it, you had made it out of the crowd, stepping into a cleared-out area.

You took a moment to glance behind you, seeing the heavy crowd, and all the bodies moving about. Turning around, you suddenly found yourself face to face with a door. It was watched over by two heavily tattooed bodyguards. The men guarding the door looked different than the bouncers, each of their arms heavily tattooed, wearing heavy utility belts around their waists. Your curiosity was slowly taking hold of you, as you tilted your head at the men. 

Suddenly, the two men in the center took a few steps to either side, parting like the Red Sea, as the door behind them suddenly opened. Your eyes caught onto the first boot that walked out of the darkness, your eyes trailed up slowly as the rest of him appeared from the pitch-black, darkness into the low, gleaming light. The first thing you noticed was his hazel eyes, they gleamed through the light, capturing your pure attention. His blonde hair contrasted against his dark suit, his hands tucked into his pockets as he stepped down the rest of the way. He stopped, just right in front of you, and the two of you locked eyes. You took in his entire form. Your head tilted just a little, as you looked upon his face, the clean-shaven look, the broad form, realizing that he looks so familiar, that you’ve seen this man before. 

Memories flash before you, tan walls, bright lights, sliding chairs, and tables, black suits, and a mean smirk staring down at you. You glance up, jumping as you realized the man has gotten closer to you, no longer standing on the steps in front of the door.

“It’s been a while, sweetie?”

Braun… 

It was like lightning had struck you, as your mind flashed back to almost a year ago. 

“Babe, what is this place?” You couldn’t help but ask as you looked around the fancy lobby area. 

However, he didn’t answer you as he walked up to the hostess behind the table, talking to her before guiding the two of you somewhere. You tried to speak up again, asking him about this restaurant he took you to, but he only hissed at you, before focusing on the table before you. It was a long table, filled almost to the brim with prim and proper-looking people, all talking amongst themselves. 

“Mr. Braun, I’ve brought more of your guests.”

The scattered chatter spoon became hushed whispers as almost everyone looked up at the two of you. At the head of the table,  hardened hazel eyes looked up at the two of you standing there, the intense stare causing your back to straighten up as he glanced between the two of you. He had his folding in front of him, resting on his elbows and he produced a glare so menacing towards your boyfriend, the only thing you could skin them to was the hard and nasty stares your grandmother used to stare down at you whenever you broke her stuff.

“Mr. Forster, I should have you arrested for stalking,” the man started, waving away the hostess.

Your boyfriend, despite the obvious and sudden sweat that dripped down his face, as well as his shaky hands, spoke, “yes, Mr. Braun, I understand, but I just really need some of your time to talk about this new business venture.”

Business venture… so this wasn’t a romantic dinner like you thought it would be. YOU could feel yourself deflating as your boyfriend suddenly let go of you. He reached down, pulling out the seat closest to him, immediately, sitting down, leaving you to be the only one standing. Flustered, you began to reach for the seat next to him, hoping to pull it out and sit next to him quietly.

“Stop.”

Everyone froze, as the words echoed through the nearly empty backroom of the restaurant. You looked up only to find his eyes on you, which only caused everyone else’s eyes in the room to look at you. 

“You crash my event and make yourself known, the least you can do is pull out your own girlfriend’s seat, huh Forester?”

Floch, already flustered and embarrassed, only turned red as he stuttered against his words, “Oh, oh right, sorry, Mr. Braun.” Your boyfriend began to move to get, to pull your seat out for you. 

“I’m not the one to say sorry to, and don’t bother moving,” is all Braun said, before snapping his fingers.

All of a sudden, a man wearing an all-black suit appeared right behind, causing you to jump a little. He pulled your seat out for you, making a quick gesture for you to sit down.

“Take a seat sweetness.”

Quietly, you thanked him before sitting, squeaking as he pushed into your chair for you. Glancing up, seeing Mr. Braun’s eyes on you as you settled down into your seat. 

— — —

Seeing those same hazel eyes sent you in a whirl spin. Almost a year passed and you could still remember them staring into your eyes just like that day. 

“Mr. Braun… the dinner party…”  your words tasted acrid as you spoke them, inadvertently bringing up the memories of your ex-boyfriend. 

His chuckle sent electricity down your spine, seeing him step a bit closer towards you, “just call me Reiner… glad to see you remember me, huh?”

“Yeah… I’m surprised you remember me?” You winced at your words, internally yelling at yourself for the awkward choice. If he noticed it, he didn’t say anything about it, only moving towards you even more.

“Can’t forget a pretty face, now can I?”

Your mind was yelling at you to move, but you could barely bend a knee as he towered over you, his hands no longer tucked in his pockets, instead, he reached up, his hand slightly pushing past your long braids that frame your face, before caressing your cheek. You couldn't help the shaky breath, the clench between your legs as you got a whiff of his string cologne. 

“Come with me.”

It was a demand, not a question.

He took you by the arms before leading you up the platform he had once descended from. You couldn't help but glance back at the retreating party behind you, seeing the crowd get smaller and smaller as your vision soon became surrounded in black. The two of you moved through the darkness, the music changing from the EDM-focused club music to something a lot slower, and a lot more sensual, combined with a lot of bass. 

It was as if you stepped into a new dimension. 

The atmosphere was different from the one downstairs. That one was exhilarating, heart–throbbing. 

This one was heart-stopping. 

Your heart felt strained, trying to pump blood throughout this entire experience. Your inner ears constantly vibrated and fuzzed as you took a step into the crowd. Every movement felt like it slowed down, you could barely see two feet in front of you, much like downstairs, but somehow, it felt… different. It felt as if the bodies were closing in on you with every step you take. You rubbed your cold hands against your skin, hoping to warm it up a little and gain a sense of grounding within you. You let out a shuddering breath, feeling the temperature around drop with every step you take. The music was loud, almost deafening even, you could barely hear yourself think. All you can do is take one step at a time, trying to warm yourself through the cold environment. You couldn't help the way you held onto the man taking you deeper and deeper into this new-founded area, digging your nails deep into his arms to steady yourself into this anchor of a man. 

The two of you soon pull up to this table, surrounded by other people as he guides you to a velvet-cushioned seat, before sitting right beside you. All the men sitting around were huge, wearing suits of all different fabrics and cuts. in their hands either held expensive cigars or lit up, causing the area around them to smell like smoke. This caused your face to grimace, moving your hand up to your nose to block the smell. 

“Smoke’s getting to you, sweetie?” A low voice came up to your voice.

An arm wrapped around your shoulder, a hand grabbing at your face before turning it to the right. 

“I always hated the smell, Floch used to smoke cigarettes, and would stink up the apartment too.”

“Heh, you’ll get used to it,” is all he said, reaching out as someone handed over a perfectly wrapped and sealed cigar.

That same person lit it for him, before bowing and taking their leave. You watched them just as he inhaled the first smoke. The smell hit you, your nose slightly wrinkling at the tobacco. Reiner’s arms kept you close, putting you up against the smoke as he looked down at you. 

Before you lost your nerve, as you turned to him, your hands rubbing down your arms to calm the chills that ran up your spine, “Why did you bring me here?”

Reiner glanced down at you, blowing smoke out from the corner of his mouth. He then leaned down towards you, his heated breath from the cigar ghosting over your ear. 

“Look around Sweetness, what do you think this place is?” He whispered into your ear. 

Your eyes glance around the room, landing on the different people moving about. Some people were standing around smaller stages, watching strippers easily glide themselves up and down the pole. However most of the people were standing around couches, you could barely see what they were looking at. Looking closer at one of the couches, seeing one of the bodies move, your eyes widen at the scene. You saw a man—no, two men, one towering over a woman and the other one having her on his lap. You couldn’t see everything, but you knew what was happening, what the other people were watching. Reiner must have heard your gasp when you spotted one of, what looks to be many events, happening on the couches.

Your legs crossed, a dull sensation washed over you. Suddenly, your hyper-awareness activated, feeling Reiner’s hand on your thigh. His hand continued to trace circles in your thigh, his actions causing your head to feel slightly fuzzy, combined with the smoke in the air, from the cigars and the heavy smoke machines. You could only sway with the beat of the music, your body grazing against Reiner’s body. His arm that was once weighing on your shoulder slid off, before trailing up your face, pushing past your braids, caressing the left side of your face. The roughness of his hands grounded you just a bit, your dropping eyes fluttering open a little to look at the man with you. 

“Did you like what you saw, sweetie?” He whispered to you, his lips grazing the outer shell of your ear.

You nodded your head, vigorous in nature, gasping as he didn’t move his head from your ear. Rather, he leaned even closer, dipping down a bit before pressing slow and soft kisses against your neck. It had been a long time since you’d had anyone touch you. Seven months since you broke up with Floch and even longer even since he had gotten arrested. A shaky breath left your mouth, your hands reaching up to his suit, gripping onto it for balance. The hand was touching your thigh slide up, slipping in between your legs, his fingers grazing up against the slightly damp fabric of your thong. The size of his hands, as well as his strength, made your legs begin to spread apart. You couldn’t help but glance around the room, feeling all eyes were on the two of you. Suddenly the hand that pressed against your face, its grip tightened, a gasp leaving your mouth as you suddenly faced him again. The sudden hard stare caused you to squirm, your eyes darting about. 

“Look at me, don’t look at anyone else… just focus on me,” he commanded, before releasing his grip on your face.

Before you could even think, his hand flew down to your hips, lifting you up and placing you right onto his lap. The first thing you felt was his erection, pressing against your barely covered pussy. His legs spread wide as well, easily taking up the space upon the seats you were sitting on. The people around you all easily made space, but you could tell that they were all watching, their eyes felt like lasers burning holes into your psyche. Yet, all you could do was focus on Reiner before. Your heart was racing, and you felt heat flushing throughout your entire body,  from his actions to the people staring down at you. 

“Reiner–” you stared before you were cut off by him suddenly pushing you forward, your lips landing on his. 

He tasted like scotch, with an aftertaste of smoky cigars. Despite your known aversion to anything tobacco, you found yourself deepening the kiss. Your hips began to grind against him, hoping to find that perfect rhythm. Underneath your dress, your clit throbbed again the thin fabric of your thong, your pussy throbbing with every movement you made. Reiner’s hands slide down your back, before cupping themselves underneath your butt, underneath that the fabric begins to rise up and crumble up around your hips. You could feel the air hitting in between your legs and the deep feeling that your thong was on display for those around you to see. 

Spit began to drip down from your lips, evidence of your intense makeout. Slowly, you pulled your lips back, your lungs immediately inflating with air. Reiner’s hands began to massage, almost kneading the flesh he clung onto. By this, your thong was soaked, and the area around his erection was slightly damp with your juices. His finger thumbed at the thin strap of fabric, pulling it as far back as he could before letting it go. The loud snap stung against your skin, your back arching into the pain, eliciting a slightly painful yelp as your pussy clenched around nothing. 

“Reiner!” you shrieked, your hands and nails gripping his back and shoulders, digging into his clothing. 

You could feel him smirk against your skin before his fingers lifted up your thong strap before popping against your skin once more. Every throb of pain had you clenching around nothing, soaking your thong and his pants even more. By now, your dress had ridden up to your waist, so everyone was able to see just what he was doing to you. No one said anything, they only watched as he grabbed at your thong, beginning to pull the thin fabric down your legs. Your nerves wreaked havoc on your hands, seeing how they trembled as you began to slide them down from behind his neck to his chest. You lifted your legs a little bit, helping him get your thong off. 

He held them in front of you, shaking them like a cat toy with a sneer on his face, and an evil grin. You tried to reach out and grab for them but he pulled them back, a chuckle leaving his mouth as he laughed at the way you lunged at him. Reiner pocketed them, before putting his hands right back on your butt, like they belong there. You gasped as his fingers teased along the opening of your cunt. He leaned over, his heavy voice echoing in your ear as he spoke to you once more.

“Second thoughts, sweetness?” he asked you. 

Despite your sudden fear, you shook your head, your hands suddenly gripping the fabric of his suit. 

“Good,” he smirked, “because I’d hate to not be able to give all these people a nice show.”

That was the last thing he said before suddenly lifting you up, letting go of his cock. You squealed as he suddenly turned you around, fully facing the audience you had amassed. Your heart almost dropped, you could barely even see the back parts of the room, with the way the crowd had amassed itself. You hadn’t relaxed just how many people were watching you. Their eyes never left you, you could see their hungry eyes taking in the scene before them. Your dripping pussy, Reiner’s cock, the way you whined and grinding into him, everything. You couldn’t help the way tears welled into your eyes, but at the same time, a forceful tingling heat wracked through you. The humiliation you felt rocked you, yet all it could do was make your pussy even wetter. Their eyes were magnets, sticking to your every reaction. 

He stretched your legs wide, the sticky sound of your pussy easily bringing in more of the crowd. Hips fingers, continuing to tease you, dipping down into your hole, smearing some of your juices at your clit. He spread your lips even further, having no problem to let all these people watching you get fucked. You let out a sharp gasp as you felt his thick finger beginning to prod at your hole, your juices dripping down onto him. Melting as he further plunged his finger into you, hissing at how tight you were. Your eyes glued to his hands, only able to watch the way he slowly began to ravish you, bit by bit. You bit your lip, restraining your budding moans as his finger slid deeper into you. 

“Reiner—“ you choked, your head thrown back as his thumb pressed up against your wet clit. 

Your hips ground against his hands, clenching around his fingers. Rocking against him, succumbing to the way he pulled different reactions from your body and your lips. Your moans echoed through the room, and you could hear the muffled grunting of some of the men watching you. You could hear their whispers, wondering who you were. You could hear the jealousy on some of the women’s lips, complaining about how someone as unknown as you could gain Reiner’s attention. Writhing underneath his hold, you couldn’t help the way their animosity elated you. You cried out as you felt his fingers brush up against your g-spot, your back arching away from his front side. 

“Fuck— I’m gonna, I’m gonna cum—“ your words were high pitched, feeling the sudden building ache rushing through you. 

Suddenly, you were left out cold as you felt his fingers abruptly pull out of your cunt. You had no time to whine or complain as a gasp left your mouth and your body jerked suddenly, feeling Reiner beginning to stand up behind you. His hands slide down to underneath your knees, further spreading your pussy open. You crossed your arms, heart racing as you felt his angry red tip prodding at your entrance. For a moment, you glanced up, and standing behind a couple people, you could see familiar olive green eyes, with his tan hand tucked in his pocket, holding a glass of liquor. 

Before you could fully register the sight, your body convulsed as you felt the tip of his cock easing into your sopping wet cunt. There was no need for foreplay, with the way you had been dripping all over Reiner from the moment he placed you on his lap. 

“Oh my– oh my god,” you whined out, your head thrown back as he pressed his dick into your further, hearing him grunt as you felt yourself slowly stretch around him.  

“Big—“ you cried out, “its too big, fuck, I can’t—!” 

“Aww," he suddenly interjected, “can’t what? Can’t handle it?” His voice was deep and laced with condescension. 

Your body trembled at his words, and despite the humiliation, hearing the slight chuckle in the crowd, your pussy clenched around, sucking him in even further. Toes curled, you could do nothing while stuck in his hold but take it, desperate moans fleeing your mouth. You could feel his hot breath against your neck,, his own deep-seated, needful groans echoing in your ears. Although your eyes were shut you could still hear the makings of the crowd around, still watching you take every inch of him. 

Suddenly, one of his hands left your leg, before sliding across your neck and face. It wrapped itself around the front of your neck, before pulling it and your head back. His face towered over your own, and your eyes were almost jerked open. His thumb was able to reach your wet, plump lips, pulling the bottom one down slightly. 

“Open.”

It was a single command, one you fulfilled lustily, your lips parting and your tongue falling out. With nothing else, he inhaled sharply before a decently-sized globble of saliva dripped down from his mouth onto your own. Most would find the action distasteful, but not you. Your body completely wrecked with lust, could do nothing, squeeze your eyes shut, a large moan leaving your lips as his spit slid down your tongue in your throat. You melted in his hold, your juices soaking your dress, thighs, Reiner’s pants, and even a little bit of his shirt. 

Reiner ravished you, and the feeling of his cock pummeling you continued to push you more and more over the edge. Your entire body jerks, the feeling of your climax building up within you once more. His heavy pants and the heated smell of sex permeated off of both of your bodies, but it was the quieted, hissed sound of a few people watching, trying their best to stay quiet as they reached their own climax. 

“Coming!” Your words were loud but slurred from succumbing to your incoming orgasm. 

With your toes curling, your body thrashed within his hold as your cunt squeezed around his dick. Your body melted further into him as your juices poured out of you, your pussy throbbing. Your hands reached out, clutching onto the air as shaky gasps escaped from your mouth. Underneath you, you could feel Reiner’s actions becoming more erratic, his groans following along with him. With no other warning but a groan, you gasped as he came all inside of you, his cum painting your walls white. Tears streaks stained your face as you heaved in and out. Slowly, you felt Reiner slowly putting your legs down, still keeping you close to his body. You winced at the way your legs felt, seeing how they were stretched beyond their means. The crowd slowly began to dissipate as they realized you and Reiner’s bout with lust was basically over. Some still stayed, keeping their eyes on the two of you as you tried your best to clean yourself up. 

You gasped as you felt him slowly pull his cock out of you, a cool emptiness filling you. With whatever strength you could pull, you grabbed the hem of your dress, covering the mess the two of you made. You could feel both his and your cum dripping down your thighs, ignoring the way it trailed down your smooth legs. As you sat beside Reiner, waiting for him to get situated, you felt a wave of tiredness rush over you. You stretched, letting out a yawn. With no other warning, Reiner suddenly stood up, taking you into his arms. You could not fight him off as he held you tight. Through your teary and droopy eyes, you could see the crowd parted for the two of you. He walked deeper and deeper until the smoke and darkness fully covered the two of you. Your body had no strength as your body went limp, falling into a deep slumber.

taglist: @collectionofdolls @sanxuus @ryutosukai0824 (if you wisheed to be tagged, comment on my masterlist!)

[anything4mymoony]

~That Dress~

MINORS DNI

part two of that you weren't mine- you and kit are like together now- its the readers turn now 🤭

someone gave me the idea of a more dominate kit and I couldn't agree more. she's so cocky and we love her for it. I couldn't figure out how to like "reply to them" so I'm putting it here-

also guys- is anyone obsessed with her nose ??? she has such a nice nose I love it

After that night, kit had been consumed by the realization that you were hers. And that she was yours. Not a moment had been wasted after that. Brief unexpected moments of her tugging you into a broom closet before becoming lost in the frenzied moment of kisses and breaths. 

It seemed that while jade had gotten one problem fixed, she now had to deal with an entirely different new and unexpected one. From going to extended lengths to get you both to stop bickering and fighting, to finally get rid of the constant migraine, to having to find a way to get you both off of each other. 

Poor jade had found herself in many unfortunate situations where she opened a broom closet for a bucket or a broom, only to find you and kit entangled in each others arms, or that one time in the barn when she had gone to get her saddle. 

That experience seemed to have been enough for you both to dial it down a little bit, save them embarrassment from each other of stumbling across another situation like that. 

But it didn’t stop you two entirely. 

One night, after a recent ball, kit had decided to lure you into her room through a more creative scheme. Instead of just bringing you to her room, she wanted you to find yourself there. 

Upon the arrival to your room, you had been cornered by a couple of servants, muttering apologies and a messy explanation as to what happened to your room. Nevertheless, you went in anyway and saw that your bed had been completely destroyed. The frame had been reduced to nothing but large chunks of wood. It seemed almost as if someone had went in there with a sword and swung it around. 

Not wanting to spend the night in a random bed, you found yourself venturing to Kit’s room, the skirts of your dress bunched up in your tired hands as you walked. You knocked on kits door, stepping back as you waited for her to answer. A quick shuffle from behind the door sounded before she opened it, hair messy as well as her shirt, as if she had hastily thrown it over. 

“Hey,” she greeted, voice breathy. 

“Hi,” you replied, “so…someone practically demolished my bed and I was wondering if I could…sleep here?” 

“Yeah,” kit nodded and opened the door wider, allowing you inside. 

You didn’t fail to notice how her eyes fluttered at the sight of you in your dress, even though she had seen it hours earlier at the ball. 

She shut the door behind you with a snap, causing your attention to snap towards her and the lust full look in her eyes. You swallowed back a nervous smile. Kit looked like she was going to eat you alive. 

It didn’t stop you from your stomach flipping with anticipation. Before you could even get a word out from your lips, kit hd you in her arms once more, soft lips pressed against yours. She kissed you as if she had not seen you for weeks. As if this had been the first time in years she had glanced upon you once more. You cupped the sides of her face, kissing her back before she pulled away. 

Kit instantly attacked your neck, leaving a warm trail of hot wet kisses down the side of your neck, her tongue darting in and out between her lips to touch at your skin. You panted beneath her, growing warm and skin buzzing. Your legs were starting to grow weak as you clung onto her, groaning softly when she sucked in the right spot on your neck. 

“Kit,” you mewled out. 

Her hands gripped at you harder, moving back up to kiss your lips once more before you stumbled backward, trying to show her where you wanted to go. 

“You looked ravishing in that dress,” kit mumbled against your skin “I had to spend a whole torturous evening just watching you in that.” 

You shuddered, gasping once your legs hit the edge of her bed. Kit peeled herself away from you, her fingers working the back of your dress before you let it fall to the ground, your chest heaving with deep breaths of excited anticipation. Kit’s eyes slowly walked up and down your now exposed body (im not going through the fantasy undergarment crap okay) making you feel more exposed. You shyly shifted your eyes away from her, using your hand to cover up some part of your body when kit reached forward to grab your hand, a taunting smile on her face. 

“Oh I don’t think so, darling,” she grinned before pushing you back into the bed. 

Kit was kissing you again, and you were kissing her back. Your hands went in her hair while her fingers softly grazed at your body, nails biting in too soft places, leaving half moon circles in their wake. You groaned into her mouth, body shifting underneath her as you swiped your legs together, hoping to gain some friction from how painfully slow she was going. 

“What’s the matter?” Kit muttered against your lips, “are you that needy?” 

You whined, bucking your naked hips against hers. Kit grinned before giving you a sweet kiss in your lips. While she was still looking int your eyes, kit slowly pushed her ring finger into you, watching as your head fall back, eyes rolling to the back of your head, a loud moan coming from you. 

“Fuck, kit,” you cried out. 

Kit begins to move in and out of you at a fast pace, watching you as your eyebrows crunch up together, elbows propped you up as you fought to keep yourself steady. 

“Let it out, baby,” kit instructed as she kissed at your breast. 

Following her words, you groaned loudly, feeling her finger inside of your where you had needed her  most. Your body burned before her, chest rising and falling as you swelled up with pleasure inside of you. 

“Kit,” you cried out as you felt her lips attach to your nipple, her warm tongue swirling around it. 

You moaned loudly, cut off by another one of her fingers sliding into your wet pussy. unconsciously, you grabbed at her arm to try to steady your shaking body. Your legs shook from under kit, her never fading smirk growing as she watched you fall apart. 

“Keep going, gorgeous,” kit purred “I know you can, you’ve done it before.” 

“Kit please,” you breathed out, not caring with how needy you sounded. 

“Yeah?” She leaned in closer to you, continuing to move her steady fingers in and out of you “please what, love?” 

“Fuck,” you groaned, dropping your head back on the pillows, “me.” 

She gave you a sloppy kiss, bringing you closer. Kit went at a fast pace, having you moan against her lips was something she didn’t think she could ever get used to, not that it was something she would want to get used to. Your arousal was dripping from you as your hands clenched at the sheets. You felt something inside of your stomach begin to tightened, making your sounds come out faster and shorter. 

In the midst of your build up, you felt kit pull out of you. You looked up at her with disappointment, only to see her lowering her face between your legs. Without another word, you felt kit lick against your folds, ripping a shuddering whine from you. 

Kit ate you out like a starved woman. She dove her skillful tongue between your thighs, swirling it to drag out your orgasm. 

“Kit!” You cried out, your hands flying to her hair. 

Her hands grasped at your thighs, keeping them apart as she ate you out. In a matter of seconds, you had came, not comprehending the rippling pleasure that had tore through your body. Kit pulled away from you, wiping her mouth before giving you a quick kiss. 

“You did great,’ she whispered against your neck. 

You hummed in response, your body falling limp with fatigue. You only managed to get a few words out from how tired you were, 

“I love you, kit.” 

[sherwees]

tomorrow (a sequel to sappoyo)

cw : stalking, literal murders, trespassing, obsession, un consented photography, reader has self harm marks!!!, yangyang has a past of juvenile detention and overall fucked up shit.

side note : PLEASEEE READ part one first because it'll just be confusing.

Yangyang's hair felt frozen, brittle as his chapped lips sighed through a brisk gust of wind, his eyes gazing from the Moon to the processing film in between his middle and index.

His teeth gnawed his bottom lip, ripping a little tear of dry skin. The pain felt numb, the only time he felt real was within the distance of you. You only knew him as a fucking juvie, not like the ones from that one movie where they dug holes in a deserted land; but a starved for days on end juvenile.

His fingers feather the back of his head, he could hear the razor buzz as his pretty brown hair fell to his feet. He basically killed it with all the bleach and hair dye he went through; the white counters covered in a mis-mash of colors, empty bottles scattered on the ground and the cone nozzles in the sink.

“Rainbow” He mouthed, the memory of his heavy eyes looking at the bizarre colored strands in between his quivering fingers in the stained mirror.

But, he wasn't him.

He was different, every dye depicted a new phase.

A new him.

Another starting point for you both.

He'll try again tomorrow.

There you were, yet again. Too immersed in the ingredients of a cooking spray, you were allergic to soy.

The time when you dropped a wine glass at your feet when you were on a fancy date with your “sugar daddy” Kun. He was too immersed talking about his business to realize your allergy, the salmon dish scattered on the ground along with the glass on the marble flooring during your struggle.

His shopping cart came to a cease, taking a moment to bask in your raspberry scent that took up the isle. Something urged and ached his soul to get his attention and he was willing to take the leap of faith.

But you took the leap before him.

Turning around, your eyes were wide with confusion and now filled with woe. A smile appeared and faded on his face once you looked back to the bottle and placed it inside your shopping cart; trying to egg some type of conversation out of this. Your lips shuddered, your eyes looking down at your shoes in shame as you walked closer.

“I'm sorry for what happened..”

He gave a hum, scrunching his nose and played with the hem of his sleeves.

You nodded your head, your hands slid inside your pocket; simultaneously gazing at him with fond eyes. But right before Yangyang fully processed it, you already turned and grabbed the handles of your shopping cart and walked away with a slower, solemn tempo.

His fist clenched, tear after tear fell until the floor was a mess of blurry lines.

Looking back up, you were gone.

His feet paced against the tiled floors, the endless shelves of cereal just became a blur of colors. His hands trembling, unsteady on the shopping carts bar as his teeth clenched and bared together in some sort of resentment.

Your sheepish voice ran through his broken head like a broken record.

Every note and every line became tiring.

But there was still time.

Try again tomorrow.

He observed the subway cart carefully, his feet tapping at the ground. There were no cameras and the area was remote besides him and the lady across from him, asleep. Her drool dribbled down the pole, her fuzz coat covering her chest.. but he mainly eyed the coffee cup in her hand.

Not just any lady. The scum from that very day. Her nasty hands groped and gripped at his body, he took about 5 hours in the shower just to get the icky feeling off of his skin. He even tried to manipulate his memories to believe that the lady's hands were yours at some point.

You were going to forget, soon.

A new path would be opened for a beginning.

His hand reached deep in his pocket for the small bag of fentanyl.

I mean one pill kills right?

He fiddles with the bag with a sigh, walking over to the lady.

An end is always a new beginning, right?

It'll work out soon.

Soon tomorrow.

“Everything's just fucking weird, why won't God just leave me alone? Am I next? That lady fucking DIED.” Your hand trembled writing the entry into your journal, totally not aware of the male in her closet.

'Did the plan work?' Yangyang wondered with a crooked smile rising at the tips of his lips. He wished he could caress your shoulder and tell you “It's ok” but it was merely impossible.

The pen scritch and scratched on the paper once more.

“It'll be me next, I know it will. I feel eyes on me every night, I feel something tingle at the back of my neck everyday.” A tear drops on the paper, dramatically. You looked over to the closet for a mere second, Yangyang's heart palpitated.

“No, No, No..” You cried in a murmur, his eyes went wide in confusion but he then realized.

The films..

His eyes scurried through the films he pulled from his pocket in a frantic rush. Looking through them with the peeking light in between the small opening between the ridges of the closet.

In one photo of you in a pretty white negligee studying for your finals, there was little burn marks that lined vertically and a little too perfectly on your forearm.

Was this all about him?

“I know you're here!” He noticed the blade you now held inside your trembling palm, your innocuous eyes were now rubbed red from the tears. The eye bags under your eyes pushed his concern even further, your face was conspicuously starved.

What all happened while he was gone?

In the tense moment, he pushed open the door in slight hesitation. His blazing red hair met your eyes before seeing his startled eyes come into your full vision, his combat boots making the height difference intimidating.

“So this is the end.. To be killed by you.” You seethed, his heart jumped at the way the word “you” was specifically said. Looking up at him, you notice his expression not even budging. His lips parted like he was about to say something but only a weak sigh came out with a long blink and a furrow to his brows.

“Are you going to kill me too?”

“No!” He grabbed at your shoulders with a broad yell, his cold fingers travelled your neck. His eyes were wide, frantic but you could still sense the hint of a lie in his retort.

“I'll never hurt you.” He coughed before tears finally breached his waterline, his eyebrows were creased in regret.

“But you did.” Your voice carried a cruel tone, your orbs seems to be filled with spite suddenly. Your warm fingers brushed against his icy forearm as you lowered his (now that you noticed) trembling hands, a chill ran through your body at the realization; your hard facade faltering.

“I haven't eaten or slept ever since that same lady fucking died! I knew that somebody was stalking all around my house like a ghost,–” You inhaled sharpily, your gut caves in at the nauseating sensation accumulating within at the memories.

“My clothes are going missing, I reported to the police about how many fucking times about YOU. They never believed me at all, you never even thought about me.–”

“Well I do–” He attempted to stand his reason but you only continued on.

“You're just fucking selfish and–” Yangyang's eyes flashed with animosity, the frustration bubbled up into his throat as his chest expanded into a heave.

“I'm selfish?”

“Yes, you fucking are–” You stepped back, hand resting on your dresser where you placed your emergency pocket knife.

“You don't ever care about my feelings, huh?”

“BECAUSE THEY DON'T FUCKING MATTER.” Your breath became hot and irregular with fury, your frustration bore from your eyes into his own. He knew that you wanted him dead, your body language showed it all.. your fingers inching for the knife and just everything.

“I got sent off for you! I wrapped my cold fingers around that pillow and suffocated that fucking scum because he was planning to kill you if you said no to his fucking prom invitation! You don't even remember me, huh?!” His hands clasped your jaw, he inched closer. His orbs searched yours as if he trying to rerun your memory like a psychic.

Oh...

“Liu Yangyang?” You mumbled at the familiarity that rushed through your mind. Yangyang tried to ignore the warmth in his gut at your remembrance but it quickly died down once he noticed that you stepped away in alert.

The one that got sentenced to 3 years during your junior year for being involved with the smothering of Xiao Dejun.. Your ex? All those notes he sent to you, ending with “Your savior” or “My 爱” creeped you out bad. You responded with a vile letter filled with threats and it ended there.

An uneasy silence settled in, you unconsciously counted the tempo of your heart beat as your hand slid for the knife; slowly and steadily.

“Yangyang, tell me this now..” The knifes edge slid against the wood now fully grasped in your trembling hand, the steel gleamed in your lamp's light. You look down for a second and notice his fist tighten, palms turning white.

Yangyang's love and glory for you now faded into pure resentment.

Maybe he did want to kill you.

Your evil was nothing different of the officer's that handcuffed him that very day ignoring his pleads, his mother that never believed in him like his father did, the lady on the subway and Xiaojun himself.

You were both meant each other.

Meant to be dead and cold.

Before he even knows it, he grabs the knife right from your very hands.

He remembers everything.

Your gurgled scream from the first plunge.

Your final pleads.

Your hands flying everywhere on his coat, neck, shoulders as you cried and cried,

The final puncture to your rib with the blade.

“I don't wanna–”

Another plunge, crimson stained the grey of your shirt.

“just let go!”

Your chest coming to a stop for the final time.

Your eyes stopping mid blink, never blinking again.

No more writing in your journal, no more talking with your friends on the phone, no more listening to music, no more parties, no more dates.

There was nothing for him but so much for you.

Now, there's no time for you both.

He doesn't even register the banging at the bedroom door, your still head in his lap. His nimble fingers trail your jaw to your still warm silver heart pendant, your frozen skin against his warm own, he sighed. You didn't deserve this.

Looking deep into your still eyes, moving a strand that fell down from the force of the door swinging open. There was some sort of command yelled in his ear but he only continued looking at your dead beauty.

There was then a kick to his torso, he looked up at the pistol aimed at his forehead.

He leaned towards his killer.

The cold tip meeting his forehead.

There will be no future for you two.

What was the point of all this then?

There won't be a tomorrow, or a day after.

Try again, maybe another time. .

[warriorofyapping]

✩ Introduction ✩

Main WoL: Takara Kasanui on Maduin Current Expansion: Endwalker

Alts Fel Husanir on Seraph Ayymeric Deborel on Seraph Foulques Misttrail on Golem A'vett Nunh on Rafflesia -> @theforgetfulwarrior

There will be spoilers for the current expansion I'm on! I will be talking about it! That is your warning and why it it listed up above! The tag for it will be " 'expansion' spoilers "!

This is a side-blog, main is @ajaxskingdom, so any follows will come from there. I honestly just made this blog so I can yap about ffxiv and only ffxiv here. I might post stuff about my other WoLs every now and then, but I will mainly talk about Takara and ??? here.

(Info about Takara is down below) (Info about Fel is here)

Takara Kasanui

(I did not take many ARR pictures of Takara woops)

✩ Raen Au'ra ✩ Nameday -> 17th Sun of the 6th Umbral Moon ✩ ARR-32 -> Post-HW to Stb-33 -> SHB-34 -> EW-35 ✩ Born in Doma, moved to Limsa Lominsa ✩ Main Classes: Gunbreaker & Viper ✩ Side Classes: Dragoon & Ninja ✩ Main Ship: Thancred ✩ Relationships with the Scions (link)

Originally born in Doma, he had once been involved in the resistance, but after a huge misunderstanding where he got accused of being a Garlean spy, he ended up leaving the nation, taking up residence in Eorzea. His innocence had been proven, but there was still an air of mistrust, and he didn't want to be viewed as a criminal anymore, so he left despite being asked to stay. He lived in Limsa Lominsa and had been unaware that he had the Echo up until the Battle of Carteneau happened. He had intended to leave, not wanting to be involved in another nation's war, but ended up staying and assisting due to Hydaelyn's interference. Watching the world fall apart, burning all around as the moon fell, he found himself needing to help, he couldn't walk away.

He's accepted his role as a Warrior of Light relatively easily, though he has his doubts now and then on whether or not he's good enough to be looked to the way the others do. He's missed having others rely on him to an extent, but being looked to for guidance is something new that he still isn't quite used to.

Takara is a relatively quiet man, though he has been doing his best to be better about it. He was closed off during the first month with the Scions, but as time passed, they slowly managed to worm their ways passed the wall he had put up after the incident in Doma. Behind his seemingly cold exterior, they found a warm man with a gentle smile and an even gentler touch. He did his best to avoid accidentally hurting those close to him and tried everything in his power to be someone they could depend on.

After his first fight with Zenos, he became a bit obsessed with growing stronger and that obsession never went away, even after he defeated Zenos. The need to be as strong as he possibly can be buzzes beneath his skin and he trains constantly so that he can protect those around him.

His eyes and scales never really went back to normal after the Light Corruption, even when he tried to find ways to fix it. The limbal rings stayed that blinding white, his scales forever paper white, and despite his best to pretend like it didn't bother him, it clearly did, especially whenever someone asked about it. He refuses to explain the cause and the Scions don't tell anyone either, knowing how much it would upset him if they did.

[kyurume]

i love you. (even if i lose you.)

channel 2: a hot flame put out by its' own melted wax.

wc: 1.4k+

warning(s): swearing, mentions of being burnt out, crazy ass dude jumps from a balcony, and you wanting to jump off a bridge

back to masterlist - previous channel

oh.

it seems like they were busy, you were hearing what soobin usually talk about with you. anime, manga and others. you only have interest in those things because of him, so you look pretty dumb compared to alice, so before class ends, you try and join the conversation, with a funny video.

"i heard you were talking about jujutsu kaisen! i like it too, i've see this video and i want you to watch it since it's really funny."

'great introduction. that was awkward, ugh, i wanna jump off a bridge right about now.' your own voice in your head reacts to your actions, you feel really stupid, but you show them a video about gojo satoru being trapped in the cube, and someone cosplaying him, on vacation with the caption, 'pov: gojo in that cube'

"haha! that's so funny, but no spoilers! maybe someone that hadn't read as far would hear."

alice giggles, you could feel a stare burning a hole into your back, so you ignored it. maybe it was one of the girls who were obsessed with soobin, or something. your conversation ends with you and soobin exchanging numbers with alice. you had made a friend today, like you always did. you returned to your seat, next to a sleeping beomgyu, his eyes shut, his breathing slow, and his messed up hair shines in the sunlight. in this angle, anyone could fall for him. if you hadn't met soobin first, you would've liked beomgyu.

'what kind of thoughts am i thinking? snap out of it.'

you shook your head side to side, as if it would get the thought out of your head. the class ends with all four of you walking home, it turns out, alice lived near soobin, so they had to walk together, you were sad that you four couldn't even walk home together, since alice was so nice.

"you done ignoring me for a day?"

beomgyu ruffles your hair so hard, it hurt your hair's roots.

"your hair is so funny-looking, if i look at you, i might get a brain aneurysm because i'm laughing so hard."

you turn away to chuckle a little, then beomgyu stops, and puts his hand on your shoulder and turns you around.

"look at me."

you look at him, his hair, his face, his matured figure. he's grown so much. you hated how handsome he grew up to be, how you can't even laugh at some of his jokes because his smile is so blinding. it felt as if you were cheating on soobin, but your crush on him isn't gonna stop you from hanging out with beomgyu.

".. i'm looking..?"

you look confused, tilting your head, but beomgyu just grabs your hand, and drags you to your house.

"just.. forget it."

he heads to his own home, completely forgetting that you two are neighbors, so he hurriedly enters his house once you make eye contact from his front yard.

'.. weirdo.' he was being a little weird today..

you closed your front door, and turned on all the lights. it was quiet, only the buzzing of the lightbulbs and the air conditioning can be heard, your mom left you a note on the dining table's vase that reads,

'your dad and i are staying overtime at work. we're not coming home until tomorrow, and there's rice in the rice cooker, and instant noodles in the cupboards.

love, mom.'

well, you're home alone now. you head upstairs, the dark hallways of the upstairs used to scare you, you always thought someone watched you, so you ran quickly to your room. your life is not what it used to be, actually. you imagine it to be a fun shoujo-slice of life manga, just so you could escape the reality. your house, that used to be a home, is almost always empty, with only you inhabiting it. your 'popularity'? gone like the winter. nothing lasts forever, and those happy times ended for you.

it's as if heaven has abandoned you.

you went to your room, skipping dinner to read more online novels and manga. your only paradise, you've been so immersed in this colorful, but black and white world, with tacky fonts and careful strokes of an ink pen. it's wonderful. and you wished you could live in it.

you hear a tap at your balcony's sliding glass doors.

you opened the curtains, to see beomgyu, on his own room's balcony, right in front of your own, throwing tiny pebbles at the glass.

"dude, stop, you're gonna break it."

you sigh, as you crossed your arms and looked at him with a blank look, while he has a smug smile on his face, his sliding door was open, and the night's wind flows into his room, making the curtains float, and the bright light from his computer monitor shows that he just got off a game.

"i just stopped."

he leans his elbow on the railing, and leans his cheek on his palm, as he looks directly at you. the moonlight shines on his shittily dyed hair, and on his smooth skin.

"i know. and what's going on? what possessed you to throw rocks at my glass doors?"

you put your hands on your hips, raising one eyebrow, intentionally looking goofy, so it doesn't get awkward. he responds, sort of muffled due to him leaning his cheek on his hand.

"you looked sad. and lonely. can i come over?"

he looked at you with a sarcastic cute pout and puppy eyes.

"of course you can, you can just jump from your balcony to mine. i'm kidding, of course you can'—"

you were absolutely fucking wrong. he jumped.

.

.

.

.

.

.

and landed. on your balcony.

quite a success, you would admit.

"god fucking damn it, choi beomgyu!"

you punch his shoulder, when he got up. your heart almost jumped out of its' position and to your throat. he really is a crazy idiot.

your night ends with you being lulled to sleep by beomgyu's crappy lullaby.

-

six months pass. half a year in third year, alice was your good ol' buddy for makeup and skincare tips, you've grown close, like siblings. beomgyu's grades improved from line of 8 to line of 9. soobin was happy that his friend group had one more member, and he looked more handsome when he smiled, so you barely felt jealous of him and alice's nerdy conversations. you? nothing changed. you may have gotten a little more good-looking and brighter thanks to alice, but nothing else has changed. but you four have been walking to school very often!

but as we know, not everything lasts forever.

.

.

.

"i think like soobin, (yn)."

alice was sitting next to you for lunch, the boys were absent, soobin was taking care of a sick beomgyu, and got sick too, so it's just you and alice. you opened your carton of chocolate milk, and placed your tray on the canteen table. students, walking to and from the canteen's food stall, the students enjoying their meals, and some gossiping.. it was an ordinary day for everyone. but for you...?

"oh.. congrats! i'll cheer for you."

you smiled. you knew this would happen, but you completely forgot that alice can like whoever she wanted. your heart broke into tiny pieces, but you picked the shattered pieces and put it back together again, and you managed to smile for alice. you're a bad friend if you bring your friend down, right?

... even if you get hurt, you still want her to be happy.. right?

-

the school day ends, you sloppily walk home, alone. even though alice offered you a walk home, you saved her the trouble of walking you home, since her house is already far enough.

you slammed your front door shut, the house still empty and dark and you're still skipping dinner, as usual. you go to your room, drop your bag on the floor, and just sob. sob like your neighbors and beomgyu didn't hear you. you didn't care if someone sent a noise complaint, you just wanted to cry. you slept with your school uniform on that night.

you woke up. eyelids puffy, and you were late to school. it was 11:30 am, almost lunch time. you made yourself some egg and toast. you managed to brush your hair to be not as messy and stuffed the disgustingly plain breakfast down your throat, and ran to school, your hair messed up again.

you pat down your hair, as you walked into your classroom, your uniform a mess, there were whispers in the classroom, people asked what was wrong, and the teacher just lets you sit down and continues the lesson. you sigh.

you're not actually the you in your daydreams. your life isn't perfect, no one cared about you, you weren't actually the sun to their earth, you were just a speck of dust on an unidentified planet.

your life isn't as well played out as it used to be.

a burnt out candle, its' hot flame put out by its' own melted wax.

.

.

.

.

- channel 2 unavailable. -

channel 3 (end) - masterlist

notes:

that's crazy bro. writing this feels like my entire phone is on fire

[a-cloud-for-dreams]

Hii 🥰

I saw this picture and thought it might inspire a fic or an edit (no pressure 🥰)

omg this cake looks so good!!! i am literally obsessed ty!!! this may be angstier than i thought but:

Once A Shattered Heart

Book: Open Heart (Post Book 3)                     

Pairing/Characters:  Bryce Lahela x F!MC (Chandini Ramakrishnan), feat. Aishwarya Pillai (F!OC)

Rating: Teen     

Warnings: Childhood trauma/Insecurities                 

Category:  Angsty Fuff                

Words: 1.7k

Summary: As Chandini and Bryce work on planning their wedding, he helps her deal with a heartbreak that never healed

A/N:  lol i don't know what came over me idc how tired i am i love angst <333 also a lot of Tamil people have their last names as their father's first names just a random note in case anyone was curious

Of all the things Chandini went through, it was a surprise to find that wedding planning would be so excruciating. Why on earth were there so many things to look through? Venues, guests, catering, and organizing between a Hindu wedding or a classical reception. Not to mention her phone's incessant buzzing. She sighed as she planted her face into one of the couch pillows.

She felt a strong urge to nap after such a day. She would have collapsed on their couch earlier if it wasn't for Bryce helping her. He currently sat at the island calling Keiki and asking her opinion on the table settings.

"Ugh, I don't know Keiks, that's why I'm asking you! I'm 100% sure she would prefer the NAVY blue tablecloth"

She chuckled to herself, keeping her gaze on her fiance. Her charming, hilarious, supportive husband who she still felt like she didn't deserve. He cut the phone call and walked towards Chandini, planting an eager kiss on her forehead. A giggle slipped before she could control herself.

"You're so adorable, you know that?"

"How dare you insinuate I am anything less than bold or intimidating," she retorted before taking his arms and placing them around her cold shoulders.

"Whoa, Nini you're freezing!" he said. Chandini rolled her eyes. "Are you sure you don't have a fever or something? I don't think we can move our wedding to a hospital on short notice."

"I'm always cold. Besides all the sweaters are in the wash because someone keeps stealing them."

"Okay, that was only one time-"

Her phone rang, for what felt like the tenth time that day. Who could it be? She craned her neck to see the lock screen on her phone and saw one person she would never want to see in her life ever again. 

"I...have to go Bryce. After all the work we just did I believe I deserve a nap." She left his arms and he was able to see the woman who kept calling her. 

Oh for God's sake. 

He played the voicemail she sent and physically restrained himself from throwing a pillow across the room. 

"Chandini. I know you are purposefully ignoring my messages and frankly, it's just disrespectful. I'm sure none of your other friends do this to their mothers. I need to speak with you immediately after I meet with one of my clients."

~~~~~~~~

There are moments in Bryce's life where he regrets everything he does during intense moments.  This was not going to be one of them. 

He rang the doorbell to Chandini's mother's condo that she coincidently bought a month after she announced their engagement. He scoffed when she tried to argue she wanted to have more real estate in the Boston area. The woman answered shortly after the first ring and gasped in surprise when she saw her future son-in-law in front of him. 

"Miss Pillai." 

Sometimes, he forgot how similar Chandini was to her mother. From the thick wavy hair cascading off her shoulders to her prominent facial features, not to mention her intelligence. It wasn’t a surprise. Banerji was a brilliant doctor on her mother’s side and that family genius must have passed on somehow because there was something about the woman in front of him that exuded a feeling of superiority. She knew she was better but unlike Chandini, she wouldn’t feel guilty tearing other people down to bring her up. 

She laughed deeply. "Please, Bryce. If we are to be family I insist you call me Aishwarya.” 

He squirmed before continuing, eager to leave back to Chandini as soon as possible to make her a bowl of soup for her potential cold.  "Okay, fine. Aishwarya, you need to leave Chandini alone."

Her facial expressions tightened with anger and stared deeply into his. “Excuse me?”

"She doesn't want you there, and you need to get off her back."

“I can’t believe this,” she muttered, delicately bracing her head with a hand, something Chandini did all the time whenever she was in distress. 

"For the record, she doesn't want Mr. Ramakrishnan there either. Or Ramakrishnan? I guess that's his first name, right?"

She ignored his somewhat rhetorical question and muttered something under her breath. "After so many years she's still being this dramatic."

His blood started to boil against his wish. "Excuse me?" he asked, repeating her tone. 

"I believe your hearing is working just fine, Doctor Lahela. She's so dramatic. She has the audacity to leave and go against her mother’s wishes not even thinking of apologizing. Even you forgave your mother. What is her excuse?"

He balled his hand into a fist at his side. “It’s not an ‘excuse’ to not want to talk to a parent who took her anger out on her daughter because of her cheating father. God, how do you not understand how messed up that is?!”

She wasn’t startled at his exclamatory tone, almost as if she was prepared to make him mad. “I did no such thing! I don’t care for what her cowardly father did. I know for a fact that I raised a poignant, hardworking, and successful young woman or she wouldn’t be where she is today!”

Bryce stepped closer to her and laughed scornfully. “You’re the reason where she is today?! In a career, you didn’t want her to pursue?”

“Don’t speak on things you don’t understand, Doctor Lahela. I admit she would have been a better lawyer but I can admit I am proud that she is a well-known doctor. You would have never met her if it wasn’t for me. It’s simply pointless to deny my role-”

“In what? Making your daughter feel like she doesn’t deserve to be loved? For making her feel like she has to do everything all on her own or she’s a burden?” his hand started shaking, and it took him so much of his willpower to not tremble with emotion.

“It’s not my fault she thinks of herself that way. I don’t know what she did with her father but I know for a fact I gave her all the tools she needed to succeed,” she threw her hands in anger. 

"That doesn't mean she's happy!" he yelled. He took in a deep breath before proceeding. "When I started talking to her for the first time about her family, she never said anything. She always seemed closed off and she never told anyone anything. Do you know what that does to a person? Shoving your emotions so low to the point where you feel weak for being human?"

“I-uh”

“Speechless huh? Not something you see every day in a lawyer,” he jests. She glowered at him, and Bryce could have sworn he saw tears forming in her eyes.

"You don't know my life, Dr. Lahela, and you never will. I have made sacrifices for her-"

"That doesn't mean you didn't make mistakes!" his voice started rising again. "You need to accept that she's not ready to see you right now. Even after helping her in the Martinez trial. Even when she was almost on her deathbed."

He was almost out the door before she spoke again.

"I don't think we'll be getting along as much as I thought, Bryce."

He scoffed. "If it means being on Chandini's side, I'm alright with that..."

The slam of the door sent a ripple of pain through Aishwarya. Was it guilt? Anger? Shame? A text from Chandini popped up on her screen. 

I am tired of arguing with you and Appa. I’m not changing my mind. Please stop texting me.

Aishwarya cradled her face in her hands. She cut a gaping wound in their relationship from the day she was born and now she would bleed the consequences.

~~~~

He made it back to their house and sighed happily when he saw Chandini, making a large pot of soup with baked bread. She heard his footsteps and turned around eagerly. "Bryce, you're home!"

He raised an eyebrow. "You're excited. Did you think I would get lost?"

She laughed. "No, I found a cake you would like!" Chandii swiped through messages on her phone Sienna sent her. "She sent me a few pictures from the first bakery we went to together to pick up Rafael's birthday cake, remember? And look at this!"

A glazed marble cake with intentional cuts seeping with candy jewels and a heart-shaped jeweled decoration dominated his vision. He fell in love. "This is perfect!"

She squealed, unexpected for someone like her. "I know! Sienna really did a good job finding a cake, though I should probably request a navy blue color instead..."

Bryce wrapped his arms around Chandini as she was talking, desperate to hold onto this moment forever. "You're amazing, you know that, right? I'm so excited to wake up and spend the rest of my life with you." He kissed her nose softly.

She smiled, sniffling to hide any unwarranted tears. "Well, at least I'm glad I'm marrying someone with excellent taste."

Perma Tags: @peonierose, @jamespotterthefirst, @choicesficwriterscreations

[foolish-fitz]

fool's fate first thoughts

HOT OFF THE PRESSES, HERE'S ANOTHER CHAOTIC "REVIEW." I finished Fool's Fate yesterday* (ok by the time of finishing this post it was like 5 days ago) and I am absolutely buzzing about it. what a novel!!! insane!!

first of all, I am pleased to report that this is my FIRST HOBB FIVE STAR. Ship of Destiny came close but then Hobb fucked up the ending but she didn't fuck up this time!!

one thing to keep in mind: I listened to basically the first 50% on audiobook, and then switched between audio and physical for the second half. this is the first Tawny Man book I’ve read on audio, so that might impact my thoughts, especially on pacing and when comparing it to the rest of the series.

I will try to keep this one a little shorter, and I’m going to attempt to go chronologically. so let’s talk about…

the beginning

my main issue with the beginning was that I thought Fitz was going to chill at Buckkeep for a while and teach Swift, and the coterie was going to get stronger, and it was going to be great. (I am obsessed with the Skill coterie.) but instead BAM they’re on a boat. also the boat part was pretty boring but I was vibing, it was fine. honestly do not have many thoughts about this part.

the middle (before I absolutely lost my goddamn mind)

the Outisland politics and social games weren’t my favorite. I didn’t mind them but it got repetitive for Fitz to constantly be like “I just don’t have a good sense for what’s going on, our cultures are Too Different.” I LOVE Elliania, what an icon, and Dutiful really shone in this section too imo.

I completely convinced myself that Chade was draining Thick of Skill so his own Skill would be stronger. technically I was not directly proven wrong but I don’t think this actually happened and I’m bummed about it :( I guess Thick’s seasickness/hangup about boats, in addition to being a really interesting and genuine character insight, was mostly so Hobb could get him out of the way? and jumpstart Fitz and Nettle’s relationship a bit? god, so much happens in this book. side note, I do love how Nettle slowly becomes more integrated into the plot and the coterie. Nettle absolutely slays in this book - it was really the kids’ time to shine.

I also really like how much deeper Tawny Man went into Skill magic in general. I find it super interesting and it deepend a lot of character dynamics which I am always here for. this should be a different post so I'm going to stop there. good middle. it did have some pacing problems but... it's Hobb, so that's to be expected.

my mental breakdown

AUGHHHHHH. AUGHHHHHH. listen. listen. people kept telling me I was going to be sad but I was like “it can’t be that bad.” my friends kept joking about the Fool dying - “the book is called Fool’s Fate, Eve, what do you expect to happen” - and I plugged my ears and went LALALA and did not listen. and then I flexed my denial muscles so hard that even when Fitz was literally cradling the Fool’s body, I was thinking “but this isn’t right, this isn’t what happens, it must be some trick.” readers, it was NOT a trick. it was MEAN. he was fucking DEAD!! I genuinely could not conceive of this happening. I cried so goddamn hard. I could not function for several hours and then could barely function for a full day after that. 10/10 highly recommend, excellent pain.

the ending!!!

so... the scene where Fitz became whole again changed me as a person, it was so so beautiful. also true love's kiss between Fitz and the Fool which. what the fuck. I can't believe that was just in a book like that, and I got to read it. but I was a bit angry at the concept of Fitz going back to Molly. (and by "a bit," I mean "extremely.")

BUT THEN a miracle took place, which in retrospect was actually completely expected: Hobb wrote good. she wrote so good that there was literally no way for me to hold on to my bitterness for even one chapter. by the time Fitz sent his first letter, I was so invested and completely on board. it was just so cute!!! Fitz and Molly had a lot to work through, and they did work through it, and he gave her space but clearly expressed that he wanted to be involved in her and her children's life, and it was fucking adorable.

and they were happy. Fitz deserves to be happy, okay? he deserves the romance movie love story, and the sexy bee sting scene, and a bunch of children, he deserves all of it!!! god. Tawny Man really just got to me so much because of all the lighter and happier moments. I'm literally insane about this book series and if you read this far, you probably are too, so you know what I mean and I'm not going to elaborate any more.

I love this book.

[nightqueen1221]

Kokushibo with a reader who used to obsess to be his wife when he is a human and even risked their life but to no avail and reader and kokushibo become a demon they go to diffrent paths kokushibo feelings just crashed and few years later he and reader met and asked reader to become his wife and reader reaction is dumbfounded and offended because he just purposed just now and definetely rejected him

Btw oneshot please this one is sligthly based of manhwa I read

This was a bit hard to write, but enjoy!

*THIS CHARACTER IS A DEMON SLAYER SPOILER*

   "Kokushibo!" You called. It was a nice spring day, the Sakura were just starting to bloom again. The air had a sweet smell to it and the quite buzz of bugs was creating an atmosphere. His head slightly turning to look at you. You always followed him around. He told you many times to not follow him around because it was dangerous. Still, you followed him.

    "What do you need?" He asked. He never really cared for the fact you wanted to be his wife. He more or less ignored that fact. You've tried to put your life on the line countless times. Yet to him, it was just an inconvenience.

    "Please, just let me be your wife. I promise I'll take good care of you." You pleaded. He said nothing, and not even really taking note of the fact you just asked him that question. The question of being stuck together for the rest of your lives. It was something you were sure you wanted to spend it with him. Now, it was for his turn to answer.

    "Please?" You cried. "If it's not to much. I'd make sure you got what you needed, I'd make sure you have love and affection everyday."

    "I don't need that." He spoke calmly. "And why do you insist on following me. I don't need anyone to be right next to me and by my side constantly. Therefore, I don't need a wife."

    It was true he was a demon slayer, that job required the ability to move around quickly. You knew this because you were one. Really all you wanted was to stay with him. You felt like he really was the one for you.

    You two stared to walk into a forest that was full of thick and beautiful trees. So thick you could barely see the daylight of spring. The branches just touching the top of your head. It was quite but it was concerning with how much it was. The breeze wasn't a breeze anymore, it wasn't there.

    You both saw something move in the distance. Something big and most defiantly not a woodland animal. It was a demon. It had to have been. Kokushibo drew his sword as soon as possible, you following close at hand. You tried running to the demon first. You could prove to him you were strong and could protect him. Right?

    "Wait! That's a bad idea!" He yelled to you. You turned to look at him with a smile. "It's ok I got i-" you were close to finishing the sentence until you got hit. It wasn't fatile or a major injury, but it sure hurt like hell.

    Kokushibo, being calm and cool, he was able to easily kill the demon in a single hit. He went over to you were alright.

    "You ok?" He asked

    "Yeah, I'm fine, just a few bandages and it should heal in time." You whimpered. "Look, that really didn't look all the good for me on my part, I all ready know that. But, trust me I can take care of you and help you. I promise to be with you every step of the way. Please just say you'll be there too." You pleaded with desperation in your eyes.

    He simply looked at you, his eyes and mouth said nothing in response. He just handed you some bandages, got up and left. There was nothing you could do about it. You were to hurt to stand at this point.

    Turns out the wound was worse than what you thought. You couldn't move, you stayed there overnight. You couldn't find anything to eat or drink. You stayed there like that for days. You were on the brink of death. Yet, it felt like something saved you. Something that was healing your wound.

    That something, or someone, was you becoming what you swore to destroy.  A demon. You could now stand at this point, you walk, talk, hell you felt like you could do anything at this point.

    This feeling stayed this way, for years and years to come. In those same years, you never saw Kokushibo. In those years you realized, maybe he wasn't a good choice for a husband. Your last moments together was when you were in need and he just left you, barely even helping. You dicided if you ever saw him, you wouldn't ask to be his wife, you wouldn't even help him if he needed it.

    "Y/N." Was all you heard in a familiar voice. You turned to see. It was someone you never thought to see again. It was him. He didn't look like how he used to. He was obliviously a demon now, with six eyes and, he was even part of the Twelve Kizuki. You didn't know what to say or how to act.

    "Y/N, I'm sorry, for the way I acted and treated you. Please let me repay you in being your husband." He spoke with disappointment in his voice. But not at you, oh no, not at you at all. He was disappointed in himself.

    "This is your way of forgiving me?" You said. "This? Something you could have done so long ago. I asked you so many times, yet you say it now? It's pathetic honestly. I chased you around, telling you how much I could help, I chased you around telling you that we could be there for each other. Well, I guess we can't because you never said we could." You spat.

    "If you really care for me, than leave."

And just like the last time you two saw each other. He just looked at you. The only thing to change, was you weren't the one left hurt.

[cjjohansson]

YOU'RE IT FOR ME

SUMMARY ; you and Natasha argue over your mission gone wrong.

supersolider!reader x natasha romanoff

angst/fluff.

fighting/blood/injury/swearing word count;3.4k - this is my first ever attempt at writing anything. im so sorry if its terrible.

As always Steve woke you up at stupid oclock in the morning to brief you on a quick unexpected intel mission. He told you the base you were being sent to has not long been abandoned and if anyone was there, to eliminate the threat like you always do. Lucky for you, you had super-solider serum running through your veins so this mission was simple and easy for you to complete alone. You only had to retrieve some files on HYDRA creating another super-solider serum.

However Natasha wasn’t too happy about you being woken up so early meaning she had to wake up to a cold bed and you were nowhere to be seen throughout the whole compound. She looked around for you everywhere only to end up running quite literally into Steve, he obviously knew who she was looking for and finally spoke up, “Oh, if you're looking for Y/N, they went on a quick mission.”

“What do you mean a ‘quick mission’, they would have come to say bye?” Natasha responded suspiciously due to the fact that you would never leave without saying bye or giving her a quick peck on her lips regardless of how long the mission would take.

“A quick intel mission, the only person I could see who had potential in succeeding was them. Woke them up 3 hours ago, they should be back within 2. They’re fine Natasha, you don't need to worry.” Steve thought to quickly remind her that you were more than capable than going on a mission alone and that you certainly didn't need to be worried about, you’re a super-solider for god sake.

“OK, just next time notify me too when they’re going so I'm not walking around looking.” Natasha walked away straight after that proceeding to the training room to blow off some steam about the fact that you didn’t say bye.

Meanwhile

you had got to the base a little over 2 hours ago, and when Steve told you this base was abandoned you had no idea why you actually decided to believe him. The base was in fact NOT abandoned and within the first 10 minutes of you slowly making your way to the base from the quinjet you was swarmed with at least 10 HYDRA agents. You worked as quickly as you could taking out the threats left right and centre with your guns and some quite literally being thrown straight into some trees. You managed to get the agents down in record time, you was quite impressed with yourself to say the least but you knew you should call for backup, you reached for your comms only to be met with a sickening buzzing sound surrounding your ear drums, you threw your ear piece onto the floor and just continued towards the base. At the end of the day you still had a mission to complete after all.

You finally made your way into the base to see that maybe Steve was right about one thing: the base itself was abandoned but the surroundings were not. “Idiot” you thought to yourself about Steve sending you on a mission with not all accurate information.

You’re making your way through the base using your enhanced hearing for anything that doesn't sound right, guess it's somewhat of your lucky day when you hear nothing so you continue your path down the long narrow corridor to finally reach the head scientists room to gather the files about HYDRAs own knowledge on developing a new form of super-solider serum. You always wondered why people had an obsession with powered and enhanced people but at the same time you understood why. You just wished yours wasn't forced on to you and that you were given a choice but you were soon to be one of HYDRAs secret weapons, but when the Avengers found you, you had just been injected with the serum. The Avengers were infiltrating HYDRA bases when Lokis scepter had been stolen, they found you just in time and took you in straight away.

Plugging in the usb drive to transfer all data, the transfer popping up onto the screen telling you that it would take 10 minutes, “Easy enough.” that's what you had thought until you could hear footsteps coming from down the corridor. Quite heavy, long strides, possibly over 6ft tall, only one person, even better. You made your way to hide behind the door so when it opened you could attack right away, but that never came. Instead a metal arm came crashing through the wall you were standing up against grabbing you by the throat and throwing you half way down the corridor, it took you a moment for you to try and stand up but by the time you was about to stand a fist was already being swung towards your face, keeping you locked on the floor below him. You knew this soldier was like you, you could feel it but you also knew that you might not get out of this fight easily, they were much stronger. That face looked familiar, the blurring of your vision from the hits making it harder to properly see but you knew it was familiar. The beating continued with left and right hooks being thrown against your face, the blood rushing out of new cuts across your face, your busted lip and most likely broken nose. You couldn't give up. You knew that for sure. You managed to find the strength to start dodging the punches coming right at you but you knew you needed to get that drive and get going quickly. Rolling out from underneath the soldier as they went to drive their metal arm straight into your face you grabbed your gun and shot the soldier in the stomach and sprinted  back to the room to collect the usb and get going, you knew it was the only way to run rather than end up dying here alone. You finally reached the doors of the base to continue your sprint when you heard that sound of a bullet coming straight out of a gun, it buried itself right into the back of your left leg but you had to keep moving, the blood gushing from your face and now from your leg reminded you to definitely tell Steve to “fuck off” when he comes into your room before the suns even up again. Continuing the sprint, you started to only imagine one thing. That Natasha was going to have your head when you got back to the compound.

You could see the quinjet right in front of you and you had never been so happy to see one so much in your life but just as you was to step one foot onto the jet another two shots were heard behind you, you KNEW this soldier wasn't going to give up and you definitely knew they would keep up with you. The bullets finally lodged themselves into your body, one straight into your right leg and the other straight into your lower back coming out through your stomach. This wasn't good. You were just about on the jet pulling yourself up as the option to stand wasn't even an option anymore, telling FRIDAY to close the hatch and get in the air and back to the compound as quickly as it could and make sure to have medical on stand by as you land. Moving yourself to try and sit in one of the chairs holding pressure to your gunshot wound in your stomach, you heard a familiar voice ring through the speakers of the jet.

“Y/N come in, do you copy?” Natasha. Just as you go to open your mouth to reply your vision starts to blur and all that you manage to croke out are inaudible slurs, until your vision completely goes black.

To say Natasha was pissed off at Steve and you was an understatement. Oh if looks could kill Steve would already be 6 foot under. They stood on the landing pad waiting for the quinjet to arrive back at the compound but what they were expecting was not what they finally saw when the door to the quinjet opened. There you laid on the floor, choking on the air and laying in a puddle of your own blood, paler than anything they had ever seen. Before Steve and Natasha could even make it to the quinjet fully, the medical team were rushing in and putting you on a stretcher taking you straight into surgery. Natasha didn’t even make a move she stood there completely lost with that imagine in her head, but as soon as a doctor shouted you had no pulse it was like she was snapped back into reality her body was on flight mode, she made the move to try and run to you as quickly as possible but Steve had already grabbed her round the waist and was holding back against her vicious punches and kicks shouting at him to ‘let her go or he will regret it’. The sounds of Natashas shouting soon caught the ears of some of the other Avengers, running outside one by one came Wanda, Bucky and Sam. Confused by the commotion until they finally heard the sobs of Natasha in Steve's arms and the puddle of blood in the quinjet, they instantly knew this was about you.

Natasha had been pacing around the waiting room for 2 hours now, everyone telling her, you're ok and the surgery will be over with soon. But they didn't know if you were ok and when the surgery would be over they just wanted Natasha to sit down and stop pacing. Just as Natasha finally took a seat a doctor walked straight in front of them staring at Natasha.

“Are they alive?” Natashas voice coming out weak filled the waiting room, the anxiety from the question entering everyone's mind to know the truth.

“Yes”

They all finally let out a breath none of them knew they were holding. Natasha finally looks down and letting some more silent tears roll down her cheeks, she looks up at the doctor.

“Can I see them?” no one has ever heard Natasha sound so weak and vulnerable, they all knew yous were together, yous never kept it a secret openly flirting in front of everyone and you making it very clear who Natasha was to you at parties when you'd go up to her at the bar and put your arms around her waist and start slowly kissing her neck no matter who she was involved in a conversation with. But no one had ever seen this side of your relationship, the hard side of worrying and panicking when one of you was injured or on a mission. The vulnerable side and lets just say you and Natasha were not ones to let people see you both so small and fragile.

Following the doctor into another room there you laid on the bed your stomach wrapped tightly and also your legs, the bruising on your face a nice bright purple. Your skin had slowly started to have more colour in and Natasha had never been so relieved. She made her way over slowly towards your bed afraid any type of sound would wake you up. She wanted you to rest, but part of her wanted to shout and scream at you for not calling for backup or even just turning around and coming back home. Turns out she wasn't as quiet as the sound of the chair moving wakes you up from your sleep.

The bright lights make you hiss and groan. You make your way to sit up thinking it was all a dream, that is until you feel two sets of hands on each side of your body pushing you down.

“Lay back down y/n, you're hurt.” Natasha, there it is again that sweet voice you've spent months waking up too, but it's different. It sounds broken like she has been crying and is about too again at any given moment. Opening your eyes was a struggle but you finally got there. In the room stood Steve, Wanda, Sam and Bucky and sat next to you ever so gently holding your hand is your Natasha. You go to turn towards Natasha but Bucky catches your eye, everyone sees the hesitance in whether or not you want to finally speak.

“He looked like you.” that's all you manage to choke out before Nat is passing you a cup of water to drink slowly. Everyone starts to look around confused straight from you back to Bucky. Until you finally speak up again.

“The guy that attacked me at the base, thanks Steve by the way maybe next time send two people instead of one into an ‘abandoned’ base, yeah abandoned my arse.” Everyone smiles at your sarcasm but quickly pushes that to the side to ask the question everyone is so desperate to know.

“Babe,what do you mean by he looked like Bucky?” ah, Natashas voice, you simply turned and smiled at her squeezing her hand.

“Well like I said Talia, he looked exactly like Buck. Metal arm, red star. Long black hair. All the facial features are the same but not the eyes, they just looked black. Was hard to know for definite with the amount of punches I was receiving but if no one was to know Bucky like we do, then people would be sure that the Winter Soldier is alive and well.”

Bucky stood there dumbfounded not even knowing what to say or even think, everyone just looks confused at what you’re saying it makes no sense but then again yous are all in a room with three super-soliders, a witch, a highly trained ex-assassin and a guy that has robotic wings for christ sake.

“Ok i think we should all take a break give Nat and y/n some space ok? Come on guys, we can debrief you later y/n/n yeah?” Steves the one to speak up this time probably too confused and tired to have this conversation.

“I know what you're gonna say Tasha, and i'm not in the mood to hear it so can we leave the telling off until tomorrow? Ok, thanks means a lot.”

“No. we are talking about this now so it can be over with and we can move forward. Its simple really y/n/n youre a fucking idiot!” her voice starts to get louder as she continues her rant.

“You call for backup no matter the excuse you call for it or you get back on that jet and come back home no mission is worth more than your life you know that! Ugh, i’m so fucking angry at you for being so fucking reckless! You could have died? Why can't you see that? Just because you have that serum it doesn't make you invincible you know that but you've acted it! All of this for some files? How can you expect me to not be upset or angry? You’re my partner, and i love you more than anything but when you act like this it makes me think if you are even thinking about me when youre risking your life for some stupid usb.” she looks away as she continues to cry, your brain now trying to process all of these words but also all of these emotions. Wait, did she just say she loves you? You have been together for nearly a year now and neither of you had even said that yet, you both knew it but never dared to say it.

“You love me?” it's your turn to choke out now, you know you love her but one minute she is calling you reckless and an idiot then she is telling you she loves you?

“Of course i love you, you fucking idiot!”

“Ok, ok, still mad i got it” she slowly turns to glare at you this time but she sees your tears slowly rolling down your face and she instantly softens her glare. You take her hands into yours and you know you have to say it back because if you don't she is going to be even more mad than what she already is and one thing you don't want to deal with right now is a mad girlfriend because she is so scary.

“Hey Talia, listen ok? I love you too. I do, I really do. I'm sorry i was reckless, i should have come back but it was like my body was on auto mode and yes like you said that isn't an excuse i know that ok. I thought i'd be ok on my own and well clearly i wasn't as i’m in a hospital bed but i’m here. I know we both worry when we go on separate missions and I know you probably worried more because I didn't come and say goodbye but I was hoping to be back by the time you woke up. Steve said it was abandoned and when I got off the jet and started walking no one was there and then I was ambushed by some guards but I took them down with ease and there was no one else in sight, my comms went off and they were buzzing and I just carried on. I needed to do this mission baby, I needed to get this information about the serum so we can try and stop HYDRA creating more soldiers and putting them through pain. I’m sorry I've hurt you, I didn't mean to do that, I was just doing my job but I'll tell Steve for next time that if i’m to go on a solo mission that you need to be with me ok? No more solo missions, not just for me but for everyone. We need to be safe. Especially with another Winter Soldier walking around like he owns the place ok? I love you Natalia, I’m sorry.” you've already lowered your head at this point too embarrassed by telling her we all need to be safe and that you love her.

You feel one of her hands move from yours, you think she is gonna walk out but instead you feel the softness of her fingertips tracing the bruising on your cheekbones before you even have the chance to hiss at the tender touch her lips are pressed so intensely against yours. You've kissed many times before but this kiss, it's just so different it's as if she is trying to tell you exactly how much she loves you and how much she is happy you're here just by this kiss. You move your hand up to her face and slowly move it round to play with the hairs at the back of her neck, she hums and slowly stops kissing you. You didn't want that kiss to end and you groan in frustration and she chuckles at your little outburst, Nat leans her forehead against yours and finally lets out a breath. You're ok, she knows it now.

You both sit in comfortable silence for a while forehead to forehead until you feel a shooting pain in your stomach, you hiss in pain and move away to lie back down on your back. Natasha is up in an instant thinking she has hurt you but you're quick to calm her nerves.

“Baby it's ok, just some pain. Come and lay with me, please?” you pull your puppy dog face, a face you know she cannot resist. She simply smiles and makes her way back over to the bed as you shuffle over to make room for her. The next minute you're both lying and she is snuggled into your side, your hand drawing patterns on her back and her arm ever so carefully laying above your wrapped stomach.

You understood why she was mad at you, you put your life on the line and didn't think twice about how she would feel with the consequences. You hated yourself for that, you knew you'd feel the same if it was her laying here injured and not you but it wasn't.

The room was silent, a comfortable silence. One you and Natasha both could just relax too.

“When I said I love you y/n, I truly meant it. You're it for me” she moved her head off your chest to look into your eyes, her eyes held so much emotion and you knew right then and there again like you had known for the past year that you were going to marry this woman.

“And you're it for me Natalia Alianovna Romanoff. I love you Talia, forever and always.”

[thatsthewrongwallcraig]

Can't Run, Can't Hide

Congrats @syntheticavenger to 5k followers! 🌸💕

Thank you for that bomb ass prompt!

Word Count: ~1,2 k

Pairing: stalker!Bucky x Reader

Content Warnings: consumption of alcohol, mentions of cigarettes, mentions of obsessive behaviour, MDI (18+!)

Feel free to check my Masterlist! 🐻

A/N: So it's Sunday morning and not even 7 am. I'm a tad bit hungover so I blame all writing errors on that. Anyway, this has been so much fun that I'm sitting here, saying: Let me play again ❣

Tagging: @wayward-blonde @mageofvengerberg @connieisland @demotalias @rebekkah119

How it started:

Saturday night. Your Saturday night. The time you had been looking forward to all week finally came around and you felt the music, laced with a heavy bass drop, rushing through your muscles as you effortlessly moved your body to the beat. Tiny droplets of sweat ran down your neck and soaked the outlines of your tank top but that didn't matter much to you. You came to the club to dance and a little sweating wouldn't stop you from doing so. Through closed eyes, with your hands up in the air, pumping along with a rhythm that massaged every corner of your soul, you still recognized the flashing bright

lights around you. They painted your imagination in vivid colours as you felt your hair swaying from side to side along your jawline. Goosebumps erupted on your skin as you waited for the next drop to hit you, the buildup already coming on strong. As a new wave of deep vibrations finally burst through the speakers you opened your eyes, a wide grin spreading on your face while you soaked up the scenery surrounding you. Not only you, but everyone around went wild. People jumping and dancing like it was their last night on earth, losing themselves in a thoughtless trance and just living for the beat hammering through the thick and heavy air. Yes, that was exactly the kind of night you had been longing for.

For a couple more songs you danced along until you decided that it was time for a little break and a refreshing drink. For the latter you squeezed your way towards the bar, your second favourite place in this venue aside from the dance floor. You threw a warm hearted smile towards the bar keeper. The both of you knew each other from your countless party nights prior and the man reciprocated your smile with a soft wave of his hand and a nod towards the cocktail shaker. You answered with a thumbs up as you still were occupied with gently shoving sweaty bodies out of your way, mumbling not even barely audible apologies. By the time you arrived at the counter James had already prepared your favourite drink and arranged it in an unnecessarily fancy glass topped with a peel of orange zest.

"Thanks!" You almost shouted for your voice to be heard over the music

as you were about to pull your wallet from the back pocket of your

jeans.

James in front of you just shrugged his shoulders at that and signed you to put it rightback to where it came from. Instead of accepting any cash from you he drew a pack of smokes from underneath the counter and gestured towards the back door. You smiled again, because some time ago this established to be your thing: Sneaking out the back door to accompany James on his break. Although smoking wasn't necessarily your thing you enjoyed the chill night air, taking a few good breaths before you went right back onto the dancefloor.

After you grabbed your drink you followed him behind the counter, through a backdoor that was originally only meant for staff and out behind the club that was buzzing as ever. Before James had lit his cigarette and exhaled the first cloud of smoke into the night air you pointed at your drink and spilled: "C'mon...you can't just give me another one for free." James right next to you chuckled a little, his sapphire blue eyes beaming at you.

"You're here quite frequently. Just see it as a discount for

regulars." He winked an eye at you, the flame from his lighter illuminating his face in a warm orange for a split second.

"Stop spoiling me like this!", you giggled, taking a sip from the beverage "You'll never get rid of me pampering me so much."

"Who said that I'd want to?" He mumbled in return, pulling the cigarette from his mouth as a barely even there hint of red flushed his cheeks.You found yourself a little taken aback by that, but to play over it, you took another sip from the cocktail glass.

"Well...", you stated jokingly "Since I didn't even pay half of my drinks tonight you should start thinking 'bout your salary, huh?"

James only let out a soft, half-hearted chuckle at that before silence engulfed the two of you. It wasn't an outright awkward silence, but not really comfortable either. Although this wasn't your first drink tonight you could sense that something was lingering in the atmosphere, something creeping at the tip of his tongue, made visible by the way he bit his lower lip and stared off into the night.

"You good?" You muttered in between another sip, gently nudging his side with your elbow.

"Sure... I just...", James hesitated and sighed, taking a drag from his cigarette "Uhm... I don't wanna come off strange and all but...uh...maybe I'd like to see you outside the club sometimes. Maybe a cinema or a restaurant..."

For a moment you just blatantly stared at him, yet again not really knowing what to say. You did not want to hurt him, nonetheless, you had your stand on dating or matters the like. For a good moment you pondered, choosing your words wisely.

"I really appreciate it, James.", You started "But for now I'm not really looking to date...sorry."

Your words hung heavy in the air and you felt bad for them as soon as they had dropped from your mouth. You liked James. He was good company and for sure a good looking man, but since your last, rather recent breakup, dating actually wasn't something on your priority list.

"That's... it's okay." He reciprocated, throwing the cigarette bud onto the pavement.

"Really?" You poked, looking for upright reassurance.

"Yeah.", he turned to you, throwing you a gentle smile "That's totally fine."

How it’s going:

You crouched down behind your living room blinds, sinking down to the floor, burying your face into the palm of your hands. His voice reverberated in your head: “That’s totally fine.”

Yeah, nothing had been fine since that evening….

At first you didn’t take much notice of it, you thought that your imagination was playing tricks on you. Spotting James in big crowds smiling at you, running into him while grocery shopping, meeting him at your favourite coffee shop. Funny little icedents, huh? No.

It didn’t stop there.

You did not know how, but somehow he got a hold on your phone number. At first everything was cool. He asked you how you are doing, sounding upright. Some evenings you were a little too talkative after one or two glasses of wine, just being happy that someone listened. Your last breakup had been a sloppy mess and you literally plastered James with that, thinking that he’d be there for you. Well, he was...for a limited amount of time. Up to the moment where he sent you rather strange messages along the lines of “He’s been a dick..I could do way better than that!”. At first you thought of it being encouraging, telling you that you certainly deserved better, but not long after things turned south. Love letters in your mailbox, flower bouquets delivered to your doorstep and your amazon wishlist arriving at your flat. It took you some time to figure out who’s behind that, but at the time it finally dawned on you it was too late.

“I’ll get you and you can’t do anything about that!”

The latest notification on your phone read before you tossed it as far away from you as you could.

[writtenonreceipts]

I wamt all these promptswith "little one" 🥺🥺 even tho some of them are like "first bd" whovh was some time ago.

Anyway I choose just a few :) but I will send them seperately.

"Little one coming to sleep with you after having a bad dream."

Another one that came in around when I was on a "square one" kick. drabble set in that world, but not an official chapter for that Elorcan fic.

...

bad dreams and texts

Elide stared at her phone, her palms growing sweaty. She and Lorcan had been texting more often and not exclusively about their kids and school. It was more than a little disconcerting and she wasn't sure how she felt about it.

It didn't matter that she found she actually liked Lorcan as a person. Truly, when she came to that conclusion she had to run through a checklist and make sure she wasn't sick or anything. What did matter is that she couldn't (and didn't even know how to) tell Lorcan. They were friends. Their kids were friends. And Miriam was finally starting to open up around people.

Lorcan: is it normal for yr kid to be obsessed w worms? wht abt rocks?

Elide: Congrats, you're raising a six year old boy.

Lorcan: dammit

"Momma?"

The little voice immediately drew Elide from her phone. She tossed it on her beside table as her door opened and Miriam poked her head in.

"Hey sweetie, what are you doing awake?" Elide asked, already kicking back her blankets to get up.

Miriam rubbed her eyes and sniffed lightly. "I had a bad dream."

"Come here, baby," Elide said, opening up her arms.

The little girl ran to the bed and scrambled in. Her little body wrapped around Elide, squeezing tightly. Elide brushed Miriam's hair back and dropped a kiss on her forehead. Her heart squeezed painfully at the thought of her daughter being in pain and there was nothing she could really do about it.

"You're in a safe place, it's okay," Elide murmured.

She rocked them back and forth, all the while whispering assurances to Miriam. Her phone went off a few times, but she ignored it. Miriam still held onto Elide and sighed heavily.

"What happened?" Elide asked. "Do you want to talk about it?"

"I couldn't find you," Miriam said, her voice muffled as she buried her face in Elide's shoulder. "It was dark and I couldn't find you."

Elide squeezed her eyes shut. "I'm not going anywhere, okay? I'm right here."

As they stayed there in the bed, Elide continued to talk and eventually fell in to telling stories to Miriam. She was rambling mostly but Miriam didn't seem to care. Sometime later, Miriam drifted off to sleep.

Wiping at tears that had accumulated in her lashes, Elide eased Miriam onto her side and made sure she was tucked in. Sometimes it was too damn hard. She worried about Miriam and worried that she had no idea what she was doing as a mother.

Elide nestled down in her bed and sighed. There was no reason to cry. No reason at all and yet here she was practically sobbing with her sleeping daughter beside her. Miriam was safe, she was sleeping, she was no longer afraid. So why did she still feel like a failure?

Her phone buzzed on the bedside table. Forcing back her tears, Elide looked at the missed messages.

Lorcan: how dz 1kid get so much dirt on his clothes

Lorcan: either my kid got into a brawl or he skind his knees and nearly bled out 2day

Lorcan: fen keeps logging into my netflix

Lorcan: Elide?

Elide cracked a smile at his mindless ramblings, his lack of punctuation and terrible spelling. Except with her name.

Elide: Yeah, sorry...Miriam had a bad dream and I just got her settled into bed with me. Get the bloody clothes in cold water and soak with peroxide. Are you sure your kids not in Fight Club?

She sent the message off not expecting him to respond. It was now nearly two in the morning and he was likely already asleep. Why had she sent the message? It wasn't like he was hanging on to her every word.

Lorcan: miriam ok?

Elide: Yeah. I think so.

Elide: She's just...I

Elide: She's asleep now. That's all that matters. Sorry if I woke you.

Lorcan: nah. im always up late

She wasn't sure she believed him, but she wouldn't press the issue. Not now anyways because she was just grateful for someone to talk to. She had Aelin and Manon of course, but her friends as amazing as they were, didn't have kids. And there was something different about talking with someone going through the same thing as she was that made it more validating she supposed.

Lorcan: wht about you? r you ok?

Elide stared down at the message.

How was she supposed to respond to that? Because no. She was not okay. She was the furthest thing right now. She was barely sleeping, always working, always worried, constantly in a frenzy, and every day it felt like she was losing control.

Elide: yeah. I'm fine.

Lorcan: liar

Lorcan: get sum sleep. i'll bring coffee 2mrrw

Elide: Good night.

Lorcan: sweet dreams

Elide stared at their conversation for longer than was necessary. But she couldn't help. Nor could she help the way his easy mannerisms slipped through the phone and comforted her more than she thought possible.

Shaking her head at her own inane thoughts, Elide made sure her phone was charging before she settled into bed. She leaned over and kissed Miriam once more on the cheek and turned off her lamp.

Tomorrow was a new day and it was Elide would make sure it turned out alright.

...

tog taglist:

@morganofthewildfire // @aelinchocolatelover // @sexy-dumpster-fire // @bamchickawowow //  @ireallyshouldsleeprn //  @courtofjurdan //  @sassys-world  //  @sleeping-and-books  //  @superspiritfestival // @chieflemming // @julemmaes // @lysandra-ghost-leopard //   @firestarsandseneschals //  @rapunzel1523  //  @booksofthemoon  // @fangirlprincess09  // @highladysith  // @tillyrubes10  // @bri-loves-sunflowers // @rowaelinismyotp // @sheharahu // @1islessthan3books // @fromthelibraryofemilyj // @vanzetanze // @jlinez // @foughtconquered // @thenerdandfandoms // @acciowests // @cassianscool // @thegreyj // @acourtofsjmtrash // @story-scribbler  // @hellasblessed // @rowaelin-cressworth // @jesstargaryenqueen  // @amoretheiwa // @jorjy-jo // @danibutterr @live-the-fangirl-life // @foreverfallingforthestars // @strangevil321 // @pastasiren // @beanco8 // @whimsicallyreading // @infernoqueen19  // @mis-lil-red  // @lemonade-coolattas  // @themoonthestarsthesuriel // @scribbled-semantics // @realbookloverproblems // @ghostlyrose2 // @rainbowcheetah512 // @story-scribbler // @tanvee1231 // @bri-loves-sunflowers // @captain-swan-is-endgame // @mystic-bibliophile // @cretaceous-therapod //

[aurumartis]

𝐂𝐀𝐍𝐎𝐍 𝐃𝐈𝐕𝐄𝐑𝐆𝐄𝐍𝐂𝐄: 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐙𝐄𝐃 𝐂𝐎𝐌𝐈𝐂𝐒.

i've been thinking a lot about jhin's canon storyline  &  how fast paced it is. as jhin mains know, jhin's all about the marathon  &  not the sprint.

to aggressively summarize in case you don't wanna read the justifying details; jhin's role in the zed comics is only loosely similar as depicted . . . the timeline involving jhin's story following prison release  &  him announcing his return is massively extended by four years, where he spends most of those years abroad  &  incognito. the order of the events taking place in zaun  &  ionia are switched around for the sake of how i've been developing jhin so far ! for more information: please read on.

ZED. first i need to mention, i will not portrayal jhin as obsessed with zed as shown in canon. at least, not enough to go straight for zed's neck after being released. just like all people he's especially keen on killing, he prefers to take his time to plan their ‘finale’. he's like a painter with a blank canvas — a sculptor who sits  &  stares at a marble block for hours to days. he's not usually impulsive  &  when you only have one canvas or one chunk of marble, every stroke of the brush  &  every chipping of the stone counts.

POST TUULA. so that being said, i'd made some adjustments to his canon to allow him more time to acclimate to life after imprisonment. this also gives him more room to travel around to other regions  &  basically . . . integrate him to the world after being isolated for so long.

jhin is imprisoned at age 21  &  he is ‘freed’ at age 34 instead of 38  &  spends four years in hiding to re-craft his . . . work. because news of his ‘disappearance’ from tuula has surely reached the kinkou  &  shadow orders, jhin flees to valoran for a few years — residing in ╱ visiting locations like the noxian colonies, piltover, zaun, bilgewater,  &  wherever it makes sense to be. being who he is, he is exceptional at remaining incognito. mass murder  &  serial killings by his hand do not occur nearly as often or as Loudly, but he does still kill. when necessary.  ( sb: how can he possibly stand living without killing the way he used too ??  me: simple. every artist needs a hiatus to revitalize their work  &  hone new skills. in addition, post-prison jhin probably went through a dangerous depressive period, honestly. let him feel worthless for a while. )

NEW TOYS. he receives his new weaponry  &  guns sometime during that ‘hiatus’, still funded by the radical side of ionia's government. if anything, it was an invitation to return to his killings.  ( maybe, i'm still deciding if i want to keep this or make him 100% independent assassin ╱ self funding )  much of his arsenal is adjusted to fit his particular combat needs by his own self. imbuing his own magic into said weapons takes much work  & being unable to use magic for several years during incarceration — he had to re-adapt  &  refocus ╱ unblock his chi. traveling throughout runeterra has also allowed him to pick up his new tricks that canon is rather ambiguous about.

SONA. only after those years does, he plan to seek zed  &  return to ionia as the golden demon. a notable stop before ionia is demacia where he meets sona. during his time in other regions, he hears all the buzz about the newest ‘virtuoso’  &  of course he is not happy about it. let him stew in his bitterness for a couple years, instead of him immediately wanting to off her once he's released.

ZAUN & ONWARD. this part is very tentative towards roleplay partners with involved muses  &  subject for re-adjustment. after parting ways with sona, jhin stops at zaun where he decides it would be fun to take out some foreign entities like the terrorist he is. ( also to announce that his bullshit has gone international ) he gets kicked around by camille first before taking a bow  &  making a scooby doo villain exit through a secret stage trap door. then he is confronted by zed, akali,  &  shen as shown in canon, since he has pretty much already dropped a google pin of his whereabouts with the mess he made. now regarding jhin's torment of zed in ionia, that happens after the events of zaun. but again, it's much more drawn out  &  may potentially be written differently. 

also for purpose of continuation of his story, he is not caught. he escapes . . . surprise ! like always. but they do rough him up a bit  &  foil his plans. i will leave the details of this vague as to not disrupt any roleplay partners' canon too much.

the end ! i promise there is a method for this madness i've spun. mostly, i made these changes to allow more plot opportunities for non-ionian muses  &  extra now-older jhin character development. plus, it just makes more sense to give him time to ‘re-adjust’ to society after being between the same four walls for most of his 20's. yikes.