#this was my biggest predicament in 2023 | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

grigori77 · 1 year ago

Text

2023 in Movies - My Top 30 Fave Movies (Part 2)

20. THE LAST VOYAGE OF THE DEMETER – Norwegian director Andre Øvredal EXPLODED onto the scene back in 2010 with one of the very best found footage horror movies ever made, Troll Hunter, and immediately declared himself as one to watch in the future. It’s been frustrating, then, that he’s largely failed to truly deliver on that promise since – subsequent offerings such as The Autopsy of Jane Doe and Scary Stories to Tell In the Dark are noteworthy but ultimately underwhelmed me, while Mortal had some really great ideas but turned out to be a clunky mess that left me cold … but he FINALLY made good with one of the best horror offerings of 2023, a film which Stephen King himself counted as one of the best horror movies he saw all year (seriously, look it up). Screenwriters Bragi Schut Jr. and Zak Oikewicz have taken an interesting tack here, delivering a brand new take on Dracula by not adapting the whole novel YET AGAIN but instead basing their jumping off-point on what’s usually little more than a footnote in most screen takes (if not just ignored altogether), the dark chapters detailing the fateful final voyage of the good ship Demeter, which transported the undead Count’s earth-filled coffins from Transylvania to England before finally running aground on the coast at Whitby with all hands lost. The result is a deliciously harrowing, thumbscrew-tightening masterclass in slowburn suspense and ratcheting tension which follows the ill-fated crew who discover far too late that their cargo contains a monster that feeds exclusively on the blood of the living, Øvredal expertly overseeing an oppressively atmospheric gothic thrill-ride which offered up some of the year’s biggest and best scares while milking every drop of pure terror out of the simple conceit that once they’re on the open water there is NO VIABLE ESCAPE from their dread predicament. It certainly helps that the crew themselves are a well-rounded collection of characters we come to really sympathize with and root for – Corey Hawkins (Kong: Skull Island, In the Heights, The Tragedy of Macbeth) is a strong hero as new ship’s doctor Clemens, slowly bonding with the likes of Liam Cunningham’s grizzled but kind captain Eliot, The Suicide Squad’s David Dastmalchian as the Demeter’s gruff, cynical quartermaster Wojchek and Eliot’s grandson, the ship’s cabin boy, Toby (The White princess’ Woody Norman), as well as Aisling Franciosi (The Nightingale), who delivers a turn of intense wounded poise and troubled vulnerability as Anna, a Transylvanian peasant girl unwillingly smuggled onboard in the cargo for Dracula (portrayed, through some impressively effective mocapped digital effects, by REC, Mama and Slender Man’s Javier Botet) to feed on during the voyage, whose rescue when she’s discovered sets the overarching horrors loose upon the crew. Ultimately it’s easy enough to see what Stephen King saw in this – this is a genuine BLINDER of a horror movie, scary as hell, emotionally darker than the blackest night and shot-through with an edge of genuine exquisite NASTINESS that leaves a deep, lasting impression on you LONG after the credits have rolled. As an intriguing and surprisingly original piece of standalone horror cinema this really is something special, but if it WERE to be the start of a larger cinematic story I certainly wouldn’t say no, not if Øvredal and this talented writing duo remain on board …

19. THEY CLONED TYRONE – while cinemas may finally be properly getting back into the full swing of things now, with many of the big budget offerings that were long delayed by COVID finally emerging to fill up the year’s international moviegoing calendar, streaming services don’t seem to be letting that slow their own steam (granted, it’ll be interesting to see how things look by THIS year’s end, when the fallout from the Writers Guild and SAG-AFTRA strikes REALLY starts to hit, but I’m not about to get into THAT debate here), and Netflix is no exception, still leading the pack with their Original filmmaking offerings. BY FAR the most interesting, original and downright FIENDISHLY INGENIOUS offering they dropped in the past year HAS TO BE this thoroughly unique sci-fi satire from up-and-coming screenwriter Juel Taylor (Creed II, Space Jam: A New Legacy), who makes his feature directing debut in truly BLINDING fashion. The concept itself is an absolute belter, although while the title may sound DECIDEDLY spoiler-heavy already, it’s actually just the very TIP of the iceberg, and giving much of anything about the plot away would reveal some pretty key twists to anybody who didn’t already see the trailer. So if you DON’T wanna get spoiled, just rest assured this is a PHENOMENAL FILM and it really MUST BE SEEN, and just check it out good and cold … still here? Okay then … John Boyega continues to stretch his legs away from Star Wars as Fontaine, a mid-level drug dealer in a suburban American ghetto simply known as The Glen who’s gunned down in a turf dispute, only to wake up unharmed the next day with no recollection of said events. As he investigates this uncanny twist, he ropes in the dubious help of two acquaintances – pimp Slick Charles (Jamie Foxx) and hooker Yo-Yo (If Beale Street Could Talk and The Marvels’ Teyonah Parris) – only to discover a dark and twisted labyrinthine

conspiracy that stretches far beyond the urban confines of their beleaguered neighbourhood. The results are one of the slickest and most brain-bakingly twisted chunks of speculative science fiction I’ve come across in a good long while, constantly throwing the viewer narrative curve balls while posing a dizzying series of moral and socially critical thematic quandaries, all the while presenting a brilliantly off-beat reimagining of classic “blaxploitation” tropes (indeed, this is among the very best examples of this quirky little sub-genre I’ve EVER come across). It’s also got a LETHALLY devious sense of humour to it, beautifully subverting expectations to bring a delightfully skewed inner-city slice-of-life POV to proceedings which it then mines for the purest nuggets of comedy gold it can find. That being said, there are times it gets pretty dark too – while it’s never particularly violent or harrowing (despite some of the obvious elements of its subject matter), the way the conspiracy itself unfolds as its monstrous nature is revealed gets truly existentially terrifying at times, and in the current political climate feels a little TOO possible … and then there’s the cast, who tie everything together PERFECTLY, the three leads in particular taking what could have been a joke set-up trio of the genre’s classic trope archetypes and invest them with genuine heart, soul and complex nuance – Boyega is endearingly vulnerable and effortlessly likeable as our sort-of hero, while Foxx brings both requisite quirky charisma and surprising deeply-hidden sympathy to what’s usually one of the most classically despicable character tropes out there, but the real STAR here is Parris, who effortlessly steals the film out from under her peers as a smart, plucky and brilliantly resourceful amateur sleuth who’s frequently miles ahead of everybody else as the mystery unfolds around them; meanwhile Kieffer Sutherland brings delightfully sleazy “cracker” energy as Nixon, the brutally amoral bureaucrat nominally in charge of this nefarious far-reaching plot. Taylor handles proceedings with admirable skill and an impressively artful visual flair while crafting one of the year’s most intriguing and thought-provoking films so far, and immediately marks himself as a clear rising star with a hell of a lot of one-to-watch potential for the future. I look forward to whatever it is he does next …

18. BLUE BEETLE – as for moving the big screen DCU moving forward, here’s a project that, apparently, is actually making the leap from old to new very much in one piece. Despite being long developed as a flagship film for the original DCEU, Gunn seems to be folding this cinematic origin story for the second generation of one of the DC Universe’s lesser known (but still iconic and beloved) superheroes into his new vision. Which basically means that THIS, right here, is our first real taste of what’s to come in the NEW vision … and, if I’m honest, if this IS a good indicator, then I’m actually all for it. Marking the big break of up-and-coming Puerto Rican filmmaker Angel Manuel Soto (who made a small but potent impact with his feature debut Charm City Kings), this is also EXTREMELY notable for being the first major studio movie about a Latino superhero, namely Jaime Reyes (Cobra Kai’s Xolo Mariduena), an impoverished young pre-law graduate from the fictional metropolis of Palmera City’s Edge Keys who finds himself essentially FORCED into taking up the long-vacated mantle of the Blue Beetle after accidentally symbiotically bonding with a mysterious alien superweapon system simply known as the Scarab. Unfortunately, this device is being zealously sought by psychopathic weapons corporation CEO Victoria Kord (Susan Sarandon), who wants to use its unique programming as the basis for her world-changing OMAC weapon system, and she’ll do ANYTHING to get hold of it … that’s really all you need to know about the story, the film proving to be a welcomely lean and impressively streamlined classic archetypal hero’s journey original story which also EFFORTLESSLY sets up the story moving forward into what are, I’m sure, gonna be some EVEN MORE impressive adventures once the new DCU proper gets off the ground, and the end result makes for one of the year’s most genuinely ENJOYABLE superhero movies. Mariduena makes for an endearing young hero here, investing Jaime with wide-eyed innocence and precociously earnest charm that belie some pure steel when he has to learn to man up and get in the fight for real, and the rest of the Reyes clan are similarly well established here too, particularly wildly popular stand-up comedian George Lopez (who here shows he has ONE HELL of a high pitched scream) as conspiracy nut Uncle Rudy and Hocus Pocus 2’sBelissa Escobedo as Jaime’s sweet, acerbic and FANTASTICALLY sassy little sister Milagro, while almost IMPOSSIBLY beautiful Brazilian actress Bruna Marquezine thoroughly impresses as Victoria’s estranged granddaughter Jenny, the tough and resourceful daughter of original Blue Beetle Ted Kord. And then there’s the villains, and OH MY GODS does this film pay off

BIG TIME by genuinely OUTPERFORMING when it comes to the all-important job of giving the hero suitably heavyweight antagonists by providing us with a pair of genuine STARS here – Sarandon is frequently downright CHILLING as a stony PSYCHOPATH who doesn’t care about ANYTHING but making her own twisted, perverse technological dream a reality, while Apocalypto’s very memorable Big Bad Raoul Max Trujillo handles the muscular side of things with consummate professionalism and brooding feral intensity as her pet special forces killer Ignacio Carapax, the recipient of the OMAC prototype and therefore, essentially, Jaime’s first nemesis. There’s some INCREDIBLE action on offer here, the visual effects delivering magnificently to bring the Scarab AND OMAC’s versatile capabilities out in fine style, but for the most part this is a film which rides high on a glorious mixture of good old fashioned light-hearted humour and a massive dollop of emotional heft and pure HEART, delivering some genuinely POWERFUL heartbreaking character beats once things get REAL before finally paying off in a wonderfully cathartic old fashioned Hollywood happy ending. In many ways this film feels almost like a THROWBACK to simpler times, but it also paves the way impressively well for the future of the franchise if Gunn and co are INDEED intent on following this kind of formula moving forward. Certainly this is a prime example of how to do a bright and cheerful primary coloured superhero movie WELL, and I look forward to plenty more of the Blue Beetle when they finally get their shit together again …

17. EVIL DEAD RISE – sometimes you just can’t keep a good franchise down, and that’s ALWAYS been the case with the Evil Dead movies. That being said, each movie has always happily been its own thing too, so even when Sam Raimi was making his original trilogy they were all movies you could easily pick up and watch as a standalone without needing to see the others too. Better, though, is the fact that every offering so far has been consistently GREAT, even 2013’s sort-of reboot from Don’t Breathe and The Girl In the Spider’s Web writer-director Fede Alvarez, which did a genuinely spectacular job of bringing the franchise kicking and screaming into the new Millennium while also delivering something which was unapologetically old school in the very best way. Thankfully this is definitely the way that the latest writer-director, relative newcomer Lee Cronin (The Hole In the Ground), has decided to do things, although he’s also taking this newly-rebooted story in a fresh new direction with a MAJOR setting change as the Deadites are, for the first time (at least on the BIG screen) unleashed in the big inner city. It’s a bold move, but certainly has the instant charm of doing something we’ve never seen before, bringing the claustrophobic madness of the originals into a very different but equally close-quarters environment as we’re now seeing the demonically possessed monsters terrorising their victims in tiny apartment rooms, cramped corridors and malfunctioning elevators which make for a whole host of new opportunities to change up the scares, the action and the direction of the thoroughly skewed plot. Best of all, this is BY FAR the most female-centric film in the franchise to date, making for a much more interesting and far less testosterone-heavy atmosphere this time around as the women get to take the lead far more than they did in the previous movies. The gods know that’s VERY MUCH my shit right there … Vikings’ Alyssa Sutherland is a veritable FORCE OF (UN)NATURE as Ellie, the downtrodden single mother trying to keep her three kids and her whole life from going off the rails until she’s taken over by the Evil when her calamitously foolish young wannabe DJ son Danny (Storm Boy and The End’s Morgan Davies) finds and reads from the Book of the Dead, while Picnic At Hanging Rock’s Lily Sullivan is endearingly vulnerable and fallible but ultimately steely as her Ellie’s estranged kid sister Beth, who comes home in a bad spot just in time to get thrown into the middle of the ensuing chaos; Gabrielle Echols (Reminiscence) and Nell Fisher (Northspur), meanwhile, are both similarly exceptional and thoroughly memorable as Ellie’s teen and pre-teen daughters Bridget and Kassie. The majority of the action plays out in the impressively squalid confines of the newly-condemned apartment building, turning uncomfortably familiar surroundings into downright TERRIFYING nightmarish hellscapes as the horrors unfold within, Cronin pulling out every trick in the book to deliver a knuckle-whitening scare-fest that skilfully works its way under your skin and grips your heart tight enough to make it explode with sheer anxiety, and, like every one of its predecessors, he has managed to pull it all off with the absolute BARE MINIMUM of digital assistance, this film representing another resounding triumph for spectacularly NASTY physical effects. This was definitely the NASTIEST thing I saw in a genuinely GREAT YEAR for horror cinema, but more than that it’s ENTIRELY lived up to its legacy, earning its place in one of the greatest horror franchises of ALL TIME with pride. I look forward to seeing what Cronin does next, and I can’t wait to see what the series is gonna throw at us next, either …

16. BALLERINA – nope, NOT the Ana de Armas-starring John Wick spinoff, we still got ‘til the summer to wait on THAT ONE. That being said, seems that one now has an ADDITIONAL benchmark to live up to given what we got with THIS sneaky little South Korean surprise gem that snuck in under the radar on Netflix in the autumn ... now I LOVE Korean cinema, there’s SO MUCH great stuff that’s come out from this market over the years, not just from the greats like Park Chan-wook and Bong Joon-ho, but lesser known hits and overlooked hidden gems that run the gamut of genres. So I was already intrigued when I heard that Netflix’ latest under-the-radar release was getting RAVE REVIEWS across the board, and then when I heard the premise, never mind the title, I was even MORE interested. I mean a 100% on Rotten Tomatoes is NEVER to be sneezed at, and this one DEFINITELY deserves the hype – it’s a tight, taut little suspense thriller with a simple premise which up-and-coming writer-director Lee Chung-hyun (The Call) nonetheless turns into an intriguingly twisty piece of work indeed. Jeon Jong-soo (Burning, The Call) stars as Jang Ok-ju, a reclusive loner who comes a bit unstuck when her one real friend, the titular ballerina Choi Min-hee (Drive My Car’s Park Yu-rim), commits suicide, leaving her a parting note begging her to avenge her death by killing a brutal local sex trafficker named Choi Pro (My Cute Guys and Natalie’s Kim Ji-hoon), whose monstrous drug-induced rape of her and subsequent blackmail using a cruelly acquired sex-tape of the crime led Min-hee to take her life in shame. It just so happens that Ok-ju is perfectly equipped for this, being a retired executive bodyguard with some seriously LETHAL combat training giving her that most coveted “certain set of skills” … this is SUCH a great stripped back, slowburn action flick, taking its time to establish just how deep the bad guys have fucked up without even realising before finally unleashing one hell of a badass new screen heroine on them. Jeon Jong-see genuinely is a star in the making, surely destined for great things given what we see from her in this, understated but deeply nuanced as a withdrawn introvert fully capable of turning, without warning, into a cold blooded KILLING MACHINE if provoked, and she is a PERFECT driving force for this film; Kim, meanwhile, is a genuinely NASTY piece of work here as Choi Pro, a nihilistic sexual sadist who relies on his classic K-pop boy band good looks to put his victims at ease before destroying their lives, and Park Yu-rim is just the right balance of sweet and sassy in her flashback appearances to make the loss of her character hurt all the more, thoroughly justifying her bereaved friend’s roaring rampage of revenge. Lee Chung-hyun also proves he's going to be a filmmaker worth watching in the future here, weaving an entrancing spell as he draws us in with the atmospheric first half before finally unleashing the fury in the second when it comes time to deliver a series of blistering, bloody and beautifully put together action sequences. Like I said, that OTHER Ballerina movie’s gonna have to work hard to beat THIS one …

15. EXTRACTION 2 – back in 2020, when the Pandemic was really ramping up and not only the Summer but the whole year’s cinematic calendar looked like it was going in the toilet, the streaming services stepped up and took up the slack in fine style, and none carried more of the weight than Netflix with their Original Films. One of the year’s most impressive offerings was their fascinating team-up with MCU filmmaking heavyweights the Russo Brothers, who produced and co-wrote the first Extraction, an unadulterated two-hour adrenaline shot of an action movie that blew all our socks off and announced to the world that debuting stuntman-turned-director Sam Hargrave was going to be a proper future star in his own right in the most demanding of cinematic genres. Needless to say Netflix was IMMEDIATELY clamouring for more, just like the rest of us, so Hargrave and co returning with this equally blistering non-stop thrill-ride of a follow-up was a genuine no-brainer. Thor himself Chris Hemsworth returns as former Australian special forces soldier-turned mercenary hostage extraction expert Tyler Rake, battling to recover from his near-death experience at the end of the first film in order to rescue Ketevan Radiani (Abigail’s Tinatin Dalakishvili), the sister of his ex-wife Mia (Olga Kurylenko), and her children from the brutal Georgian prison they’re trapped in alongside Ketevan’s monstrous husband, Davit (Tornike Bziava), who’s facing a ten year stretch for his crimes as a bigshot in the Georgian mafia. Except that during the breakout Tyler’s forced to kill Davit, which sets the whole mob, led by his furious brother Zurab (Tornike Gogrichiani), hot on their heels … like its predecessor, this is a film that, after taking a little time to set things up, hits the ground running with one INSANE action sequence on top of another and keeps going full-throttle for pretty much the entirety of its remaining runtime, Hargrave and his RIDICULOUSLY hard-working and committed stunt team delivering some of the year’s most spectacular set-pieces as they constantly up the ante on EVERYTHING they did in the first film. Once again the absolute highlight is a genuinely INSANE unbroken single-shot sequence that takes at least twenty minutes all told to tell its mesmerising story, and this set piece alone really is the equal to anything we got in the John Wock movies. Hemsworth again proves that he really IS the God of Thunder even when he ISN’T playing Thor, kicking arse and taking names like few other action heroes are capable of doing, but this time it's an absolute JOY to actually get to see returning co-stars Golshifteh Farahani (Body of Lies, Paterson, Invasion) and, in particular, Adam Bessa (The Blessed, Mosul, Harka) both get a MUCH bigger slice of the action themselves as brother and sister Nik and Yaz Khan, Tyler’s trusted mercenary partners, both proving as viciously lethal in action as our main protagonist; Gogrichiani, meanwhile, makes for an agreeably FERAL villain as a grieving butcher determined to get blood for blood no matter the cost, while Dalakshvili tugs hard on our heartstrings as a desperate mother willing to go to extraordinary lengths to keep her children safe. Altogether this is another undeniable POWERHOUSE action thriller, relentlessly effective and blissfully engaging from start to finish, and in many ways it’s EASILY an improvement on its predecessor. Needless to say a third film is ALREADY in development, and after this I’m SUPREMELY confident it should be just as much worth the wait …

14. PUSS IN BOOTS: THE LAST WISH – my first candidate for top animated feature of 2023 was an interesting one because, while I am a MASSIVE fan of Dreamworks Animation Studios’ output in general and the Shrek films in particular, I have to admit that the FIRST standalone spinoff featuring Antonio Banderas’ awesome fairy-tale character left me somewhat underwhelmed … yes, I know, it’s a travesty, STONE ME!!! I know I deserve it … but really, even with Salma Hayek on board it just didn’t reach the same levels of sheer unadulterated COOL that the Shrek movies did for me. So I approached the EXTREMELY belated follow-up with a definite sense of trepidation, despite the intriguing new animation style makeover that’s clearly HEAVILY inspired by the recent success of the first Spider-Verse movie and the massive anticipation for its incoming sequel. It looks GORGEOUS, but as we’ve learned to our cost over the years with this kind of filmmaking, looks DO NOT always automatically mean it’s gonna be a belter. Thank the gods, then, that I was proven wrong THIS TIME … yup, for his sophomore spinoff movie, Puss FINALLY got a vehicle he could truly be PROUD OF. It’s got a BRILLIANT premise which PERFECTLY fits with the amount of time that’s passed since the first one, and definitely means that the older fans among us (like myself) can definitely find A LOT to resonate with in terms of the themes here – Puss discovers that he’s only got ONE of his nine lives left and it sends him into a DEEP existential crisis as he realises that he’s pretty much WASTED much of the time he had, and technically that means he’s only got ONE CHANCE left to truly be alive. So he abandons his riotous adventurer lifestyle and “retires” as a lap-cat for one SERIOUSLY weird cat-lady, Mama Luna (High Fidelity’s Da’Vine Joy Randolph) … only for his past to catch up to him in the form of a quartet of bounty hunters, Goldilocks (Florence Pugh) and the Three Bears (Ray Winstone, Olivia Colman and beloved up-and-coming British comic Samson Kayo).

This prompts Puss to escape onto the road for one final adventure reuniting with his long-lost love Kitty Softpaws (Salma Hayek), who’s none too happy to have him back in her life after he abandoned her at the Altar, as well as a deeply odd new companion, Perrito (What We Do In the Shadows’ Harvey Guillen), a diminutive therapy dog who was masquerading as one of Luna’s cats, as they set out in search of the Wishing Star, a fallen star that can grant whoever finds it their heart’s desire, which means Puss could get his other Eight Lives back. Except that they’ve still got the bounty hunters on their trail, along with (now decidedly) BIG Jack Horner (John Mulaney), a magic-item collecting entrepreneur who has a score to settle with Puss which definitely coincides with his fervent desire to claim the Star for himself, and a mysterious Wolf (the irresistibly silky tones of Narcos’ Wagner Moura) who may actually be Death Himself, who has his own, much darker reasons for finding Puss. Y’know how they say you judge a hero by the strength of the villains he faces? Well with antagonists of THIS calibre, Puss just might have finally met his match … and even better, EVERYTHING ELSE about this movie is as strong as the Big Bads – it’s one of the most well-written, well-directed and deeply, affectingly resonant movies that Dreamworks have EVER DONE, EASILY on a par with the rest of the Shrek canon and even matching up impressively well with true Gold Standards like Kung Fu Panda and the How To Train Your Dragon movies, everyone involved in this project clearly giving it their all in a total labour of pure, unadulterated LOVE that pays VAST dividends on the screen. The cast, of course, are among the greatest key ingredients in this, and as we’ve come to expect from these movies they’re all pulling their weight MAGNIFICENTLY – Guillen and Mulaney in particularly deliver SPECTACULARLY in their respective roles, while Pugh and

her cohorts are at once hilariously good fun but also elevate their characters FAR ABOVE their one-note bad guy potential thanks in no small part to some VERY intelligent, well-rounded and deeply complex character development from the writers, but in the end the main weight of the film OF COURSE rests on the shoulders of Banderas and Hayek, and once again they’ve both proven they are MUCH MORE than capable of bearing it with grace, professionalism and a glorious evergreen twinkle in their eyes. As for the animation and design, this is a BEAUTIFUL piece of work, definitely one of the year’s most visually arresting films as well as, quite simply, one of the most gorgeous films that Dreamworks have EVER put together, the studio effortlessly adapting to this sexy new style that made Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse and Netflix’ Arcane such glorious feasts for the eyes, and the animation team deserve JUST AS MUCH praise as director Joel Crawford, a storyboard veteran who previous proved his helming pedigree in fine style with 2020’s wonderfully oddball The Croods: A New Age. Ultimately, given the storyline, themes and the way the film ties things off so neatly, I suspect this really will be the last we see of Puss In Boots on the big screen, but if that really is the case then I gotta admit it’s ONE HELL of a swansong …

13. THE KILLER – a new David Fincher flick is ALWAYS cause for my celebration, since he’s steadily become one of my ABSOLUTE FAVOURITE filmmakers. Ever since his singularly SPECTACULAR breakthrough with Seven in 1995, I’ve been following his career with RABID interest, and he’s NEVER let me down, impressing me EVEN with his rare misfires (see The Curious Case of Benjamin Button), so I was REALLY looking forward to seeing what would happen when he FINALLY reteamed with screenwriter Andrew Kevin Walker (Seven, 8mm, Sleepy Hollow) for a fresh new thriller for Netflix following his lucrative new production deal that started with 2020’s brilliant biopic Mank. Adapted from a cult French indie graphic novel series from Alexis “Matz” Nolent and Luc Jacamon, it doesn’t so much tell the story of a ruthlessly efficient professional hitman as provide a fascinating procedural peek into the meticulous modus operandi of an obsessive compulsive serial killer-for hire. You’re not SUPPOSED to root for the hero in this – Michael Fassbender’s nameless assassin is a cold-blooded, emotionless cypher who maintains a painstakingly precise lifestyle regimen powered by a stringent personal mantra to make sure he never makes ANY mistakes and makes himself as impossible to trace as possible during the execution of each of his kills, Fincher intentionally making him seem almost CARTOONISHLY bland in order to make it clear this is a man who can just fade into the background even in the most heightened and harrowing of events. That being said, there’s still something so bafflingly COMPELLING about following the Killer on his blood-soaked adventures as he goes about tracking down the person who’s trying to have him killed after inexplicably botching a hit in Paris, which I’m sure was also ENTIRELY intentional on both Fincher and Walker’s part. Fassbender, meanwhile, is clearly enjoying himself with a MASTERCLASS in subtlety, effortlessly delivering swathes of emotional detail in the subtlest of ticks, blinks and double-takes while his toneless narration delivers ponderous insight on his surprisingly poetic inner-monologue. Ultimately this is VERY MUCH his film, the narrative largely focusing on the Killer sliding anonymously through the world as he ruthlessly executes his plans, but some of the film’s most rewarding moments are watching just how alien this individual REALLY IS through his interactions with others, particularly ill-fated encounters with on-point talents like Charles Parnell (All My Children, The Last Ship) and a typically peerless Tilda Swinton. Fincher has sometimes been labelled as one of Hollywood’s most cold and emotionally detached auteurs and I don’t doubt that this one will definitely be used as fuel for that continued critical fire, but I can’t help loving this one even so – this is thriller cinema at its most exquisitely cynical, an intense work of razor sharp ART from a filmmaker I cannot help bowing down to WORSHIP yet again, and I cannot WAIT to see what else he’s going to do as he continues with this already incredibly successful deal with Netflix …

12. THE MARVELS – oh boy, do I have A LOT to say about THIS ONE … those who follow my blog probably know how vocal I was about the truly SHAMEFUL treatment this received upon its release, or even just in the runup from its own studio … seriously, Marvel just GAVE UP on this one before it even came out, didn’t they? And then the way they threw director/co-writer Nia DaCosta (Little Woods, 2021’s Candyman) under the bus after she DARED to speak out about her own treatment during production? I mean the MCU’s been struggling for a while now, but to actually SELF-SABOTAGE themselves like this, it’s unfathomable. Fuck … no, I’ve decided I’m NOT going to rant about that whole mess any more, I just want to get the word out on WHY I think all the naysayers and the haters and toxic fanboys who couldn’t even be bothered to TRY and give it a chance before it even arrived are just WRONG, how this is actually one of THE BEST MCU films we’ve had for a good while … certainly since Endgame dropped and we reached what was clearly the smart CLOSING POINT for the series before the bean-counters went NUTS over the profits and insisted on keeping the whole crazy train rolling … back in 2019, I was one of the first Captain Marvel movie’s strongest supporters, I LOVED that flick, but then I guess I WAS kind of biased since Carol Danver IS my absolute favourite Avenger, so I was SO PSYCHED when it was confirmed that we were gonna be getting a follow-up. Especially once it was made clear that this one would also fold in Maria Rambeau’s sweet little girl Monica, now grown up into a superhero in her own right (while she never actually gets her monicker here, I always really liked Photon), as well as the star of one of the VERY BEST of the Disney+ Marvel shows, Ms Marvel herself, Kamala Khan. I held onto that fervent hope even as the MCU started to go progressively more off the rails, with properties tanking left and right or stalling before even getting off the ground, I just dug my fingers in and HOPED that we could at least hang on for THIS ONE to save everything, because I KNEW it was gonna be good. It HAD TO BE. And oh my gods, it actually WAS …

it’s an absolute, unbridled JOY getting to spend more time with Brie Larson’s criminally underrated Carol Danvers, now wrestling with a newfound vulnerability after her own attempts to end the tyranny on the Kree homeworld of Hala just ended up making things SO MUCH WORSE, especially once events transpire to bring her into the orbit of Monica (the brilliant Teyonah Parris, returning to the grown-up role after her equally excellent introduction in Wandavision) and Kamala (the irrepressible and genuinely EFFERVESCENT Iman Vellani), and the trio must learn to fight as a unit when their powers become intrinsically entangled in such a way that they end up swapping places each time they’re used. The central trio are clearly having an almost INDECENT amount of fun here, visibly bonding as their characters learn to appreciate each other for who they REALLY are and get over the various pieces of emotional baggage that they’ve brought into the relationship (particularly Kamala, a Captain Marvel MEGA-fan who comes to love Carol far more as a real person, fallible but ultimately with a good heart who’s TRYING HER BEST); meanwhile it’s always rewarding to get to see the lighter, more irreverent side of Samuel L. Jackson’s Nick Fury, especially after the frustratingly dour wasted opportunity that was Disney+’s Secret Invasion, as well as getting more of Zenobia Shroff (The Big Sick) and Mohan Kapur (Hostages) as Kamala’s parents and Saagar Sheik as her big brother Aamir. And then there’s the villain … thank you Marvel for giving us another genuinely GREAT, surprisingly sympathetic screen villain like Namor in Black Panther – Zawe Ashton (Fresh Meat, Velvet Buzzsaw) is ON FIRE as embittered Kree warlord Dar’benn, who uses a galactic McGuffin to empower herself in order to take revenge on Carol through brutal, genocidal force for the woes that she believes the “Annihilator” (Captain Marvel’s new name among the Kree) has wrought upon Hala … this really is a step up from the somewhat muddy nemesis dynamic we got in the otherwise great first film. The decision to deliver it all in such a significantly SHORT feature this time round actually also proved to be a real saving grace too – this is a tight, stripped back affair that wastes no time getting to the point and telling its story quick and efficiently, not seeming to carry ANY fat in its sleek run-time … although I will admit I had SO MUCH fun with this one I wouldn’t have MINDED an overstuffed two-and-a half hour movie if it could’ve meant getting more time with my girls. It really is almost as much fun as the OTHER major MCU WINNER we got in 2023 (but more on THAT in a minute), delivering on the action stakes and bringing us suitably ROBUST feels but ultimately winning us over through its truly IRREPRESSIBLE sense of humour, frequently dropping genuine BELLY-LAUGHS on us (particularly in a truly inspired needle-drop montage that renders events wonderfully BIZARRE for a little while), as well as some exquisite little winks and nods for the pure fans among us. The end result was a proper CLASSIC for the franchise and once again I have to ask WHAT THE FUCK, MARVEL? Why the hell did this get such a rough go of it? It’s genuinely unfair, I swear …

11. GUARDIANS OF THE GALAXY, VOL. 3 – time for the obligatory top MCU entry, then … but for once, this doesn’t feel like I’m trying to dress up a pig, either – YET AGAIN writer-director James Gunn has proven that he is, quite simply, THE BEST, most consistently ON-FUCKING-FIRE filmmaker working in the franchise, which perhaps makes the fact that he’s now OFFICIALLY jumping ship to permanently defect to DC particularly bittersweet, I guess. This is WITHOUT A DOUBT the best MCU movie since Captain America: Civil War, and it couldn’t have come along at a better time since the series has been in SUCH a tough spot of late … anyway, the worst, least reliable, most unrepentantly despicable bunch of space-faring A-HOLES for-hire in the entire galaxy are back, now set up full time in their base of operations in Knowhere and looking to get back to business now the Universe has finally gotten over all that unpleasant post-Thanos Snap fallout. But the crew themselves are still suffering some lingering after-effects from that shake-up, particularly Peter Quill/Star Lord (Chris Pratt), who’s a pretty much permanently drunk, despondent, emotionally broken MESS since the Gamora (Zoe Saldana) that came back after Endgame ain’t HIS Gamora, which leaves Rocket (Bradley Cooper) and Nebula (Karen Gillen) propping things up in his essential absence as the current nominal leaders of the crew. This shaky status quo is torn asunder when an explosively violent encounter with the Sovereign’s new superpowered agent of vengeance Adam Warlock (The Maze Runner’s Will Poulter) leaves Knowhere in chaos and Rocket critically injured and in need of urgent emergency care due to a previously undiscovered proprietary kill-switch built into his cybernetic implants making it impossible for them to heal him without killing him, leading them to enter into an uneasy alliance with Gamora in order to steal an override code from

Rocket’s creator, the High Evolutionary (Peacemaker’s Chukwudi Iwuji), a megalomaniacal evil genius obsessed with manufacturing a perfect race to populate his envisioned utopian civilisation. Not only is this one of the very best films in the entire MCU canon to date, but it’s EASILY the best in Gunn’s trilogy, essentially a pitch perfect up reinvention of the classic overblown science fiction space opera archetype which also pays immense respect to the fascinating core group of characters it’s helped to introduce cinemagoing audiences to. It’s also a film expressly about ROCKET himself, even though he doesn’t actually have all that much screentime here, spending much of the film fighting for his life in the sick bay, but we’re treated to extensive flashbacks to his origin story as he was created (or rather TORTURED), refined and essentially brought up by the High Evolutionary, and found his first makeshift found family among his fellow pieced-together cyber-augmented animals, sweet and gentle otter Lyla (Linda Cardellini), wheeled goofball walrus Teefs (Click & Collect’s Asim Chaudry) and spider-limbed bundle of hyperactive joy rabbit Floor (The Suicide Squad’s Mikaela Hoover), who are the cutest bunch of anthropomorphic cyber-critters you could possibly imagine and, as a result, responsible for some of the biggest feels (and BY FAR the most thoroughly devastating emotion sledgehammer moments) in the entire movie. Needless to say Cooper is on top form throughout, as are the rest of the eclectic, irreverent and absolutely TOP DRAWER cast – while you may still be making unfair jokes about him being “the Worst Chris”, I think this is THE BEST performance Pratt has EVER put in, he’s an absolute REVELATION in this one, plumbing previously unfathomed depths of raw intensity and naked vulnerability as Quill’s forced to get over his shit in order to save his best friend, Saldana gets to bring a much darker and more edgy, unhinged take to Gamora, Gillen finally completes Nebula’s redemption arc to bring her fully into the realm of true HERO, and Dave Bautista and Pom Klementieff, as Drax and Mantis, continue to be THE ABSOLUTE FUNNIEST, most full-on unapologetically HILARIOUS agents of chaos in this entire trilogy, all while getting to further expand and develop their own characters too

… and, of course, Vin Diesel again brings a hell of a lot of range to just three words as lovable walking talking tree Groot; meanwhile it’s also nice to see other returning faces get plenty to do, such as Sean Gunn’s endearingly prickly former Ravager Kraglin, Elizabeth Debicki’s bitchy Sovereign despot Aisha, the GOTG Holiday Special’s fan favourite Cosmo the Space Dog (again adorably voiced by Bodies Bodies Bodies and Fairyland’s Maria Bakalova), and even Sylvester Stallone, returning from GOTG 2 as Gamora’s new adoptive “uncle”, mighty Ravager hero Stakar Ogord. Then of course, there are the series newcomers, who bring their own brands of intriguing charm to proceedings, particularly Poulter, who does a fantastic job of taking a truly badass, virtually unstoppable supreme being like Adam Warlock and essentially making him a thoroughly clueless, emotionally immature man-baby who largely doesn’t have a clue what’s going on half the time, Gunn-regular Nathan Fillion, stealing every one of his scenes in another brilliantly arch comedic cameo, and, of course, Iwuji, who brings us what HAS TO BE the trilogy’s VERY BEST villain, investing the High Evolutionary with a supremely entitled sense of moral superiority and truly monstrous ego while also managing to make him a genuinely credible intellectual THREAT to our heroes. Needless to say, this amazing cast are just part of the precisely concocted recipe that’s brought this franchise highlight to such exquisite life, Gunn and co creating a pitch perfect sci-fi adventure chock full of action, suspense, thrills, wonderfully weird new extra-terrestrial locales, yet another gold calibre eclectic soundtrack, a TRULY MASSIVE amount of winning humour and a genuinely humongous dollop of pure, unadulterated FEELS. Congratulations James Gunn, you made me cry again. TWICE, damn you. And I love you for it …

#2023 in movies #the last voyage of the demeter #they cloned tyrone #blue beetle #evil dead rise #ballerina #netflix ballerina #extraction 2 #puss in boots the last wish #the killer #netflix the killer #the marvels #guardians of the galaxy vol 3

11 notes · View notes

smoll-tangerine · 5 years ago

Text

all original stories posted on this blog & cross-posted on my aff are licensed under the Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommericial-NoDerivatives 4.0 International license.

click here for my wips

last updated: june 9th, 2023

key: ♡ = romance | ☾ = slight angst/angst | ❀ = fluff | ☼ = friendship | 🍊 = personal fave

ONEYEAR MASTERLIST: requests that i have written to celebrate my one-year anniversary on tumblr & to thank my readers.

THE NATSUKASHII 懐かしい SERIES: a collection of stories about people and their second shot at love.

CATCH ME IF YOU CAN TRILOGY: seoul is home to some of the biggest gangs and criminal syndicates in south korea and the seoul metropolitan police agency’s detectives are determined to put these criminals behind bars in the name of justice.

꒰ 🦢 ꒱ ┄┄ TIMESTAMPS

↳ [19:43] - college!au ↳ [15:00] - domestic boyfriend!au

꒰ 🦢 ꒱ ┄┄ DRABBLES

[pjo!au] + “stop pulling heroic shit when I’m not around to talk you out of it!” - son of aphrodite!johnny, percy jackson!au

꒰ 🦢 ꒱ ┄┄ TIMESTAMPS

↳ [01:59] - domestic boyfriend!au, among us!au

꒰ 🦢 ꒱ ┄┄ MOODBOARDS

↳ melodic afternoon🎼 (beige, monochrome)

꒰ 🦢 ꒱ ┄┄ ONE-SHOTS

↳ HOWEVER IMPROBABLE - [14.1k], historial!au ♡ ☾

you’ve always hated going back home to paris. but for the first time, you didn’t mind it so much. especially not after you accidentally bumped into the cute guy you had met prior to your holidays in the city you used to hate so much.

꒰ 🦢 ꒱ ┄┄ DRABBLES

[hogwarts!au] + “if the choice comes down to my life or yours, i’m always going to choose yours” - slight angst, ravenclaw!doyoung, established relationship!au

꒰ 🦢 ꒱ ┄┄ SERIES

↳ YOU’RE MY WONDERWALL - college!au ♡ ☾ ❀ ☼ (hiatus)

maybe, you’re gonna be that one that saves me. after all, you’re my wonderwall.

↳ WANTED FOR ERROR - action, sci-fi, dystopian ♡ ☾ ☼ 🍊 (hiatus)

jaehyun suddenly wakes up to a world where his identity has been completely erased. as jaehyun inquires the reasons behind the eradication of his existence, he is being pursued by agents from an unknown organization and realizes that his life is in danger.

he then meets you, a girl who is in the same predicament as he. and as you both continue to investigate the mystery behind the erasure of your now former lives, you two discover you just might be part of something bigger.

↳ TEN REASONS WHY I HATE YOU - drama, rich kid!au ☾🍊 (ongoing)

while you admittedly didn’t refuse the arranged marriage between you and jung jaehyun, that didn’t mean that you’d allow him to treat you like a doormat. for the emotional distress he had put you through during the months leading up to your engagement party, you ensure that he will pay for the way he had been treating you for the rest of his life.

꒰ 🦢 ꒱ ┄┄ ONE-SHOTS

↳ ONCE AGAIN - [25.2k], college!au, exes-to-lovers!au ♡ ☾ ❀ 🍊

after breaking your ex-boyfriend’s heart and then seeing him again at a frat party hosted by your best friend, you thought that this was the universe giving you a chance to make things right between the two of you. but sometimes, the second time never works out better than the first time even when you have learned from your mistakes.

↳ CERCA TROVA - [31.1k], college!au, journalist!jaehyun ♡ ☾ ☼

cerca trova is an italian phrase that translates to “seek and you shall find.” it is also the name of an exclusive and elusive club at seoul national university. yet, there has never been concrete and solid proof that the club actually exists.

it has been officially a year since jaehyun started researching on this secret society and came up without any leads. until he accidentally bumped into a girl in a lion mask and a ball gown—quite literally.

↳ EARLY BIRD - [25.7k], college!au, coming of age, slice of life ♡ ☾ ☼ 🍊

i remember getting an advice from someone. that person once told me that i shouldn’t be in a relationship with anyone whom i wouldn’t marry. that i shouldn’t worry about relationships.

that i should build friendships, and one day, maybe i’ll suddenly meet my soulmate and will want to spend the rest of my life with that significant other. that my life right now should be filled with spending time on finding myself and building friendships.

too bad that this advice was from my best friend. my best friend that I’m currently in love with. my best friend who is currently taken.

↳ COVERED BY YOUR GRACE - [22.3k], historical!au ♡ ☾

i once knew a boy, who fell in love with a girl, who smiled at the thought of her name. i once knew a girl, who fell in love with a boy, who felt the very same. but it became a struggle, and the timing was wrong, and love decided that they didn’t belong.

↳ SAY SOMETHING - [3.8k], ☾ 🍊

all fairy tales have a happy ending, but maybe not yours.

꒰ 🦢 ꒱ ┄┄ TIMESTAMPS

↳ [23:39] - domestic boyfriend!jaehyun ↳ [15:27] - coffee shop!au ↳ [17:22] - established relationship!au

JUST FRIENDS timestamp series (completed) ↳ [14:35] → [11:13] → [15:37] → [18:00] → [01:21]- college!au

you and your best friend jaehyun pretend to date each other because you are a broke university student who likes to take advantage of some deals that require you to be, well, not single.

UN AMOUR D’ÉTÉ timestamp series (ongoing) ↳ [14:45] → [11:27] - new! [10:00] roadtrip!au

you visit a small town with your friends and you somehow keep bumping into this really cute boy at every place you visit.

꒰ 🦢 ꒱ ┄┄ DRABBLES

[e2l!au] + “you made us enemies. i never wanted this.” - rich kid!au, enemies-to-lovers!au

[hidden relationship!au] + “my eyes! my virgin eyes!” - romcom, summer vacation!au

[e2l!au] + “well, how was i supposed to know not to open the box?!” - exes-to-lovers!au

[summer vacation!au] + “i’m always flirting with you. keep up.” - lifeguard!jaehyun

[hogwarts!au] + “i’m asking if you love me too?” - gryffindor!jaehyun

[fake dating!au] + “my eyes! my virgin eyes!” - college!au

[band!au] + “i’m always flirting with you. keep up.” - bass guitarist!jaehyun, established relationship!au

[office!au] + “i’m not jealous.” - friends-to-lovers!au, domestic!au

[college!au] + “i’m asking if you love me too.” - fratboy!jaehyun x nerd!reader, established relationship!au

[e2l!au] + “i’m always flirting with you. keep up.” - copywriter!jaehyun, enemies-to-lovers!au

[rich kid!au] + “i never planned on falling for you.” - angst, drama

꒰ 🦢 ꒱ ┄┄ SOCIAL MEDIA!aus

↳ SURFERS PARADISE - surfing!au, summer vacation!au ♡ ☼ ❀ (hiatus)

a group of surfers come together one summer to experience the ultimate surfer’s dream — an endless summer surfing at surfers paradise, australia. one hiccup? the job that landed them this gig sucks ass. period.

꒰ 🦢 ꒱ ┄┄ MOODBOARDS

↳ weekend away at the cottage💐 (cottage core, pastels) ↳ afternoon at the museum🎨 (museum aesthetic, light blue and beige)

꒰ 🦢 ꒱ ┄┄ DRABBLES

[coffee shop!au] + “i’m not jealous” - established relationship!au

꒰ 🦢 ꒱ ┄┄ ONE-SHOTS

↳ APRICITY - [12.2k], coming of age, slice of life, winter-themed ☼ ☾ ♡

as you attempt to navigate between the worlds of college and adulthood, triggering some bitter memories that involve your parents’ divorce, you and mark learn that perhaps, new traditions can be created as long as your hearts are connected.

꒰ 🦢 ꒱ ┄┄ TIMESTAMPS

↳ [17:03] - best friend!mark ↳ [16:20] - christmas!au

꒰ 🦢 ꒱ ┄┄ DRABBLES

[f2l!au] + “i never planned on falling for you!” - college!au

꒰ 🦢 ꒱ ┄┄ ONE-SHOTS

↳ OH BOY - [20.6k], college!au, romcom ♡ ❀ (feat. lucas)

having an on-and-off relationship with your boyfriend is hard. having an on-and-off relationship with your boyfriend who cares more about this stupid rivalry between his football team and the soccer team from your school is harder.

so when things got thorny, you found yourself feeling lonely due to your boyfriend’s ego and pride. then a familiar face popped up, making things take an interesting turn. everything got complicated and you can only say, “oh boy.”

↳ COME MORNING LIGHT - [30k], drama, historical!au ♡ ☾ 🍊 (feat. winwin)

king louis hendery XIV, king of france, had always reassured you ever since you were children that you were to be his wife and the future queen of france when you became his one and only significant other at the tender age of sixteen years old. but when a war that seemed to never end threatened the existence of the kingdom, he had no choice but to put your promise together temporarily on hold.

and you were left wondering if there was even a happy ever after with him to begin with.

꒰ 🦢 ꒱ ┄┄ TIMESTAMPS

↳ [16:05] - neighbour!hendery

꒰ 🦢 ꒱ ┄┄ DRABBLES

[e2l!au] + “i'm not jealous” - prince!jeno, enemies-to-lovers!au

꒰ 🦢 ꒱ ┄┄ DRABBLES

new! [college!au] + “i’m always flirting with you. keep up.” - romcom, fluff

꒰ 🦢 ꒱ ┄┄ DRABBLES

[hogwarts!au] + “yes, it is a real dragon, but i can explain everything...” - friendship, comedy

#main masterlist #masterlist #m: main

465 notes · View notes