#this was inspired by everyone in my family shitting their pants when I removed 2 letters from my name

[computer-void]

I find it so bizarre how changing one's name isn't more normalised in our society. I'm not even specifically talking about trans people here, just everyone in general. You're telling me that most people are completely fine with being called something they had no control in, and that was chosen for them?

I'm not even trying to be entirely negative when I say this, I just find it somewhat funny that one of the key factors of identifying somebody is chosen largely by those around them, not the person themselves. With the exception of nicknames, of course.

[maddiwrites]

Secret Lives

Pairing: JJ Maybank x reader

Summary: You and JJ never got along so your friends trap the two of you on a boat in the middle of the marsh to work it out. Only it doesn’t go as planned.

Note: Hi guys! This is my first writing piece. I tried not to do a two parter for my first one but it ended up being so long. Sorry! I would love to hear your feedback so feel free to leave me a message! Part two will be posted soon. Also I have completed a rewrite of the show with a JJ x Routledge sister pairing so keep an eye out for that! Also wanna shout out @skiesofthesketchy​ @malfoyfarms​ @collecting-stories​ because they were some of the first masterlists I read and I loved them and it inspired me to write my own. So thank you!

Word Count: 5.3k

Warnings: Language, angst, very slight mentions of abuse

Part 2

Y/N Y/L/N. That’s you. Or as some like to call you, Hannah Montana. You live the best of both worlds, living it up on Figure Eight and wearing hundred dollar dresses to fancy dinners and parties, sneaking expensive mimosas to brunches with your friends, and getting biweekly mani pedi’s with your sister. Meanwhile, when you’re not rolling around in the luxuries of Kook Life, you’re rolling around in the dirt with your Pogue friends, baking in the sun on a dirty small boat while drinking the cheapest beer one of the boys’ could get their hands on. Most Kooks hated you even when they wanted to be you. And most Pogues didn’t trust you even as they tried getting in your pants.

One of them being JJ Maybank.

Kiara introduced you to her group of friends right after freshman year. The two of you were the black sheep of Kook Academy. Both your families have money, sure. But you weren’t jerks about it. You enjoy a little pampering here and there, but you’re not tone deaf and superficial like the rest of your peers. You were so grateful that your science teacher paired you two together for that year’s science fair. You instantly clicked with the curly brunette and spent most of the class talking about whatever came to mind instead of actually brainstorming project ideas. After working together for months on a science fair project with a shared passion of wanting to help save the environment, Kie finally introduced you to her best friends.

John B and Pope immediately made you feel like one of the group. Sure, they were curious about your life but you never felt like you were being interrogated with questions. They included you on inside jokes and even gave you the nickname ‘Sassy’ after proving to them that you can hold your own in a verbal fight.

Thanks to JJ.

From the start he claimed to never like you. He hated where you were from, who your parents were, and that you never had a job. He hated that you didn’t even have to try to get people to like you. In his eyes, everything was handed to you on silver platter. You had a picture perfect life and all you had to do was bat your eyelashes and show off your pearly white teeth. He couldn’t stand you.

Yet, he was dangerously attracted to you.

He loved the way your hair shined against the setting sun, he loved that you didn’t wear makeup every single day like every other Kook on the island, he loved how your white jean shorts perfectly shaped your curves, and he loved how your temper was as equally as short as his because it made you fighting with him that much hotter.

Last night was no different than every other night with you and your friends. It was quiet, spent around a bonfire in John B’s back yard. You sipped on cheap beer from the can while the smell of JJ’s marijuana smoke wafted through the air. Kie lightly strummed the strings of her ukulele while Pope and JJ bickered about the pros and cons of smoking weed.

This was your family. You had friends on the other side of the island too but you weren’t as close as you were with the Pogues. You would do anything for the people surrounding you. Even JJ. You tried to tell yourself you hated him just as much as he hated you, but you couldn’t help but feel like every other girl on this island, falling for his ocean blue eyes and golden locks. His wit and his charm. His loyalty and protectiveness of his friends. How he looked with his shirt off. How he would wink at you when he caught you staring. You wished you didn’t, but you loved him.

“Hellooo, Y/N?” John B waved his hand in front of your face. You hadn’t even realized you’d been staring.

“I’m sorry. What were you saying?”

John B smirked but didn’t say what he was thinking. He always thought you and JJ were acting dumb when it was clear as day that the two of you were attracted to each other. He always caught you two staring at one another when the other wasn’t looking. You two would always ask about the other person when they weren’t there even if it was just to throw a sharp jab behind their back.

“I asked you what you were up to this weekend.”

“Oh,” You shrugged. “Probably run some errands, babysit my neighbor’s kids...”

Just like Hannah Montana, you also lived a secret life. Your life wasn’t as perfect as everyone thought it was, but you’d never admit to it. Your mother would be crushed, your friends would find you stupid and pathetic, and you would hate yourself even more than you already did.

“Good. Sunday we’re going to check out the surfing competition on Seasill Beach. JJ’s trying to qualify for it next year.”

Your smile immediately dropped. “Sunday. Oh.”

“Already got a spa day planned, Princess?” JJ smirked from across the way.

“I, uh,” You tried your best to fake a grin. “I’m sorry. I can’t go. I already have plans.”

You held you breath as you waited for someone to respond. This was the third time this month you flaked on your friends without a good explanation. You never knew what to tell them, only that you had plans. You were afraid if you said anything else, they’d find out you were lying.

“Again?” Kie stopped playing her ukulele to look at you. “Seriously. Is there some secret boy we should know about or something?”

You scoffed. “No.”

You felt the most guilty lying to Kie. After all she was your best friend. The one you were supposed to be able to share everything with, even the stuff you couldn’t tell your parents.

“Kie’s right. You bailed on us last week last minute too,” Pope said.

You opened your mouth to say something, but your head wasn’t working fast enough to come up with a lie.

“We all knew this day would come.” JJ’s smirk was gone. He flicked the butt of his joint into the fire and claps off the ash from his hands. “Hannah Montana dips her toes into the wild life. She feels free and independent long enough to decide she’d rather go back to her cookie cutter life and live with all the privilege that daddy has to offer.”

The word ‘daddy’ physically made you flinch. Your eyes narrowed in a tight glare as you dug your fingernails into the palm of your hand, hating that this was the way JJ thought of you.

“J...” John B tried to warn him but JJ didn’t listen.

“No, seriously.” JJ stood up. “I bet the reason she’s not telling us what all her ‘plans’ are is because she knows you’ll all be disappointed. Me? Well, I couldn’t care less whether you hung out with us or not. In fact, I’ve been praying for it. So tell us, Y/N, what are you doing that you won’t tell us? If it’s not some dude, then maybe you decided you’d rather be a Kook. Are you going to fancy lunches and riding yachts across the ocean? Maybe you’re spitting in the faces of the people who work to make your life easier. Maybe -”

“JJ!” Kie yelled.

You stood up, your vision turning red and your skin going hot. Usually you could take JJ’s insults. You were use to JJ throwing your family’s money in your face, trying to make you feel bad for something you can’t control, but this was too much. Because now he was calling you out on your loyalty to your friends. And he was so far from the truth.

“You would like that, wouldn’t you?” You said. The other three stood up when you took a step in JJ’s direction. John B stood close to you. He didn’t know what you were going to do, but he’s never heard your voice so low and threatening in a long time. The other time was with a Kook who was giving JJ shit. Ironically. “For me to just leave.”

“I didn’t stutter, did I?”

“Well I hate to break it to you, but I’m not going anywhere. In fact, because I’m such a nice friends, I’m going to give you some free advice. First, the last thing you want to question me about is my loyalty to the people who’s lives I would put before my own. Second, I would suggest removing that stick up your ass because it seems like your way too uptight to handle it.”

JJ glared at you and didn’t move to respond. A part of you was surprised he didn’t have anything to come back with and the other part of you was relieved.

The thick tension between you and your friends was suffocating. Your night had been effectively ruined by a simple question. But the sad part is, you didn’t even know who to blame. JJ, or the other man causing most of your guilt and grief.

“Y/N/N...” Kie tried stopping you as you gathered your stuff to leave.

“I’m out of here.”

You stormed out of the backyard and into your car. There was only so much you could take until you broke. And you were not going to give JJ Maybank the satisfaction of seeing you break.

                                            ***********************

You couldn’t fall asleep last night. JJ’s words kept replaying in your head like a bad song stuck on replay. You wanted to hate him. You wanted to blame him for not trusting you. But instead, you hated yourself. Because you’re the reason he can’t trust you. Cause you have secrets you don’t want shared.

Your thumb hovered over his contact. Not JJ’s. The man who’s made your life a living hell for the last sixteen years. You wanted to scream and cry and slap him in his face. But instead, you stayed frozen in fear. Like the little pathetic girl he says you are. And you hated yourself more for proving him right.

Your attention was taken away when someone busted through your bedroom door out of breath. Kie immediately went to your drawers and pulled out the first bathing suit she could find and threw it at you.

“Kie -”

“We need to go,” She said. “Get dressed.”

“Why? What’s going on?”

“Pope and John B ran out of gas doing grocery runs for Heyward. We need to get them with the HMS Pogue.”

“Where’s JJ? Why can’t he help you?”

“He’s working,” Kie said quickly. “Come on.”

                                           ***********************

You and Kie found Heyward’s boat stranded in the middle of the marsh like Kie said it would be. John B and Pope were waiting for you on the back and thanking you both for coming to help. You hold the gas as they helped you onto the boat. They directed you to the tank while they helped Kie.

As soon as you made your way to the front of the boat, you heard the engine of the Pogue rev and take off. You dropped the gasoline gallon and sprinted to the back of the boat where they left you. John B and Pope waved back to you as Kie drove them back to the Chataeu.

“What the hell?” You yelled at them to come back.

“You and JJ need to work your shit out!” John B yelled back to you.

“What...” You mumbled to yourself before you heard the sound of heavy footsteps running towards you. You gasp in surprise when a sweaty JJ passed you to glare at the boat that’s getting smaller and smaller by the second.

“What the fuck?” He screamed.

“There’s food and blankets in the cabin!” Pope yelled back.

“We’ll come get you in the morning,” Kie said.

You clenched your teeth together with frustration. JJ looked just as pissed off and small part of you was disappointed with that. He turned around, cursing to himself and hitting random shit in his way.

This was going to be a long day.

                                           ***********************

After four hours, you and JJ still hadn’t spoken to each other. He took over the cabin while you laid out on the back of the boat. Your head was running with different thoughts. Should you try to make up with JJ? Should you just continue to ignore him? Should you tell him why you can’t go to the surfing competition tomorrow?

You didn’t know what to do but you knew you couldn’t sit here in silence anymore.

You reluctantly stood in front of him with crossed arms. He was smoking a blunt and looking out into the setting sun. If you were friends, you would take a picture of him right now. The pink sky painted his skin perfectly.

“What?” He said without looking at you.

“Seriously?” You raised one brow. “We’re asked to do one thing on this boat and that’s all you have to say?”

“I’m not sorry for what I said last night.”

“Neither am I.”

“Fine.”

You rolled your eyes. The problem with both of you was that you’re both stubborn. But if the problem with JJ couldn’t be fixed today, you didn’t know how much longer you would be able to put up with his rude remarks and assumptions about you.

“What the hell is your problem?” You said.

“My problem?”

“Yeah. Your problem. You’ve been treating me like shit ever since Kie introduced me to you. What could I have possibly done to make you hate me so goddamn much?”

JJ shook his head in annoyance. “I’m not doing this.”

He got up and walked to the back of the boat where you were sulking not even five minutes ago. You followed him like the stubborn person you were and you continued to grill him.

“I’ve tried so hard to be your friend. I’ve bought you drugs, I’ve even done yours and JB’s laundry. I put in a good word to the tourons who ask about you at boneyard parties. I laugh at your jokes, even when they’re about my friends. I try so hard to be on your good side and you still want nothing to do with me!”

“Because you’re a Kook!”

“So?”

“You have everything. Money, family, friends, a future. I don’t trust you because I don’t know what the hell you want with us. What do we possibly have that you can’t get on Figure Eight? Hm? Are you trying to prove a point to your mom that you don’t need her? You trying to prove to your dad that you’re a tough girl and don’t need his money or protection to keep you safe? Huh?”

“You know what your problem is? You don’t listen! I’ve told you time and time again that I don’t care about any of those things. I hang out with you guys because you are my friends. I have a good time when I’m with you. Why is that so hard for you to get?”

JJ scoffed. “Please. You don’t think I see you constantly checking your cell phone? Making sure no one can see who you’re texting? If we’re such good friends, why won’t you tell us what you’re doing tomorrow? You always have ‘other plans’ and then you never tell us what they are.”

“Because that’s none of your business!”

“If my friends are going to get hurt because of some lying bitch then it is my business!”

You were breathing so heavily, you were basically panting. Your blood felt like it was boiling under your skin and your head felt fuzzy with lack of thoughts. You didn’t know what to say, truly lost for words.

JJ took another step closer to you. You’re so close to him, you can feel his breath on your face and see every mark on his skin. You never knew he had a scar right above his brow or a freckle under his ear. He smelled like weed and sun sunscreen and his breath like mint. Had you not been fired up with rage, you would have thought he looked hot and maybe even made a move.

But now it was the last thing you wanted to do.

“I’m sick and tired of you spoiled brats getting everything you want. You’re nothing but a spoiled rich kid who doesn’t even know the kind of privilege she has if it hit her in the face. You can’t relate to anything we have to go through. You don’t have to get dirt underneath your fingernails to make a buck. You don’t have to wonder where your next meal is coming from. You wouldn’t last a week on the Cut because you’ve never known what it’s been like to live the life we do!”

“You don’t know anything about me!” You snapped. The heart in your chest felt like it was being shredded to pieces by a rapid wolf. You felt like you were being torn apart one by one with each insult he threw in your face. Little did he know, he was wrong.

“I know enough to never want to see you again. I will never accept you into our group of friends. Don’t you get that? So you can stop playing the nice girl act around me and go back to Sarah Cameron and the other Kooks that you still hang out with despite knowing everything they’ve done to us. To Kie!”

Bringing up the fight between Kie and Sarah was a low blow and JJ knew it. It was something you always struggled with because you continued to be friends with both of them separately. At first, they were both mad at you but then accepted your friendship when they came around to loving the idea that you would fight for both of them. You tried getting them to talk and make up, but both of them refused. Maybe you should just stick them on a boat in the middle of nowhere and force them to work it out.

Although, clearly your experience with it wasn’t going so well.

“That’s not fair.”

“Yeah, well life’s not fair sweet heart. But you wouldn’t know about that.”

You thought the fight last night was bad. But this one took the icing off the cake. You wished so desperately that Kie had just trapped you both in a locked room, so at least you had the chance to break out and run away from the darkness that was clouding around you.

You were most upset that this was how JJ thought of you. You didn’t know if you would have the same devastating reaction if someone else had said these things to you. You wanted so badly to be friends with the blonde Pogue. You saw the way he interacted with his friends and you wanted to be a part of that small circle so badly, you would almost do anything to be in it.

But you didn’t think you could last another second of being belittled and tormented with JJ’s outspoken feelings towards you. You wished there was a rewind button so you could go back to bed and hopefully never wake up and you’d lock your door so Kie couldn’t break in.

You swallowed back the tears that threatened to fall and admit your defeat. You wanted to find the nearest corner and crawl into it and escape the murderous glare of JJ Maybank. JJ was wrong. You didn’t have everything. Because in this moment, you still wanted him. And you were just realizing that you never will.

“You judge me by the surface. You’ve never once tried to get to know me. You don’t ask. You just assume that I’m like every other kid on Figure Eight. You don’t know where I’ve came from. What I’ve been through. What I live with. You don’t know my plans for the future or my hobbies or even my favorite color because you didn’t ask!” Adrenaline pushes through your veins like a wave of energy. You’ve never felt so powerful but so small in your life.

“All right. So tell me,” JJ said. “Tell me whatever story you can think of that will change my mind about you.”

You paused, standing there face to face with someone who will never accept you. You were suddenly overcome with so many emotions you didn’t know which one to choose from. Anger, sorrow, fear, confusion, shame.

You couldn’t believe you even thought about telling JJ your story. A story that you haven’t even told Kie. The story about how you were actually born and raised on the far end of the south side. How your dad use to abuse your mother right in front of you before she managed to escape when you were eight. For six months you lived in her car before she got a job as a housekeeper at a cheap motel used mostly for hookers and their cliental. Her employer let you live rent free if your mom accepted a cheaper pay check. During one of her shifts, your mother ran right into Andrew Y/L/N. No, he wasn’t one of the hooker’s clients. He was actually on the property looking to buy out the place. Even though he was a Kook, he looked through the housekeeper’s uniform into my mom’s heart and loved everything about her. He took her on a couple dates, then less than a year later, married her. You changed your last name to his because you didn’t want any relation to your father anymore. You thought the man was scum and deserved to rot in hell for everything he put your mom through. You hated him and even wished for him to die. Sometimes you even thought about doing it yourself. But then you saw him again. At a gas station in the middle of The Cut. You couldn’t believe he recognized you and you were even more shocked he had the audacity to talk to you. And you listened. He told you how sorry he was. How he never meant to hurt your mom. How he missed his baby girl and wanted to be in her life again. You fell for every word because a part of you you didn’t know existed missed having a biological dad.

That was your biggest mistake.

He didn’t change. He was still the same bastard he was eight years ago, using violence and threats with people much weaker than him to get what he wanted. He loved guilting you with your new luxuries. How you now had everything right under your fingertips after you left him to wither away with nothing. He said you owed him. Because you were his daughter and you were supposed to love him unconditionally. And you fell for it every time. He never hurt you like he hurt your mom. A few slaps here and there but nothing to leave a mark to get your mother questioning.

So now you were trapped - trapped in his world and in his life. Using your own money that you actually worked for, little did JJ know, to pay for his bills, his drugs, and sometimes, even his bail.

You didn’t tell anyone about this secret life because you didn’t want anyone to make you feel any more pathetic and weak than you already felt. And most importantly, you didn’t want to hurt your mother by telling her you’ve been supporting the one person she’s been trying to protect you from.

And you were about to risk that by telling someone who probably still wouldn’t care about you even after hearing what you had to say. You are who you are. If JJ didn’t like you now, he shouldn’t like you after telling him your story, anyway.

“No.” You shook your head.

“No?” JJ scoffed. “I’m finally asking you tell me something and you’re saying no?”

“Because you don’t care, JJ! Not really. You think knowing my sob story is going to get you to like me? I don’t need a pity friendship. I am who I am because of shit I’ve had to overcome. And this is me now. So if you don’t like it, then fine. We’ll do it your way and call it quits.” JJ didn’t say anything as you turned around to find somewhere to pass out in hopes of getting morning to come faster.

You found a blanket deep into the cabin and pulled it over your body, shielding yourself away from the world. You hoped the darkness would sweep through your head so you wouldn’t be plagued with torturous thoughts about your past or what’s going to happen to tomorrow. You cried - you cried because even after JJ ripped into your like a zoo animal, he still hated you.

JJ was wrong. You didn’t have everything. Because you didn’t have him.

                                           ***********************

Surprisingly, the sun rose sooner than you expected it to. Sleeping on the swaying boat wasn’t as awful as you thought it was going to be. In fact, it was kind of peaceful with the stars above you and the sound of moving water right under you.

The morning wasn’t so calming. You were slapped in the face with memories of the night before. Your stomach twisted at the thought of being face to face with JJ again. You knew what you had to do and thinking about it made you sick and depressed.

You pushed yourself up and checked the time on the radio. 8:03. Anxiety instantly flooded through you. You only had two hours to get home to be ready in time to run ‘errands’ with your dad.

You looked out to the back of the boat where JJ was looking into the horizon, probably waiting for your friends to come.

Fresh set of tears pricked your eyes at what’s to come. You loved your friends and you even loved JJ. But you couldn’t stay with the Pogues. You didn’t want to make JJ any more uncomfortable than he already was and you were afraid the constant fighting would push your friends further apart. You didn’t want to be the reason for that.

You pulled the blanket tighter around your shoulders and walked next to JJ. Without a word, you looked out in the same direction he was looking and admired the morning sun.

Surprisingly, JJ was the first one to speak. He looked at you and instantly felt guilty all over again. He tossed and turned all night contemplating on whether he should wake you up to apologize or just wait until morning. He knew he wasn’t being fair. You’ve done nothing but tried to earn his trust since day one. You accepted him for all his flaws and he couldn’t do the same for you. Yeah there was the phone thing and not telling the others what you’re up to, but it wasn’t like you were constantly in his business. If you see him with unexplained bruises, you don’t pester him about it. If he comes back to the Chateau in a pissy mood and blames it on a fight with his dad, you try to make him forget about it with a distraction instead of making him tell you what the fight was about. Why couldn’t he give you the same respect?

Truth was he wasn’t so much worried about his friends getting hurt as he was getting hurt. He liked you more than a friend should which would make your departure from your friends that much more heartbreaking for him. He never felt this way over a girl, let a lone a Kook and he tried so desperately to hate you. But it didn’t work. Instead, it made him feel like the biggest asshole in the world. He wanted to fix what he broke. He told himself he still had time left. His friends weren’t back yet to get him.

“Listen, Y/N -”

“It’s fine, J,” You sniffled. This time you couldn’t stop the tears from running down your cheeks. You tried blinking them away which only made them fall faster. You hated crying in front of people. Your dad always said it was a sign of weakness and you believed him. You wouldn’t be surprised if JJ laughed in your face right now and called you a loser. “It’s done.”

“What are you talking about?”

JJ’s heart physically broke when he saw your tears. He had never seen you cry. Not even out of joy. He couldn’t believe he was the cause of this. That he had made someone as beautiful and as kind as you actually feel bad about herself. He wished he could take back time and start over. He wished he gave her a chance from the beginning. He wished it wasn’t too late.

You both looked up when you heard the engine of the HMS Pogue. In the distance, you could hear your friends laughing and calling out to you, not yet realizing their plan went to shit. You had to make this quick.

“The last thing I want is to get between you and your friends. You don’t have to worry about me hurting anyone, especially Kie. I’ll back off.” You said, making JJ’s brows furrowed in confusion and his heart raced with worry. “I’m giving you what you want. I’ll stay out of your life.”

JJ couldn’t believe it. He couldn’t believe he drove you to do the one thing he actually never wanted you to do. “Wait. You’re leaving?”

You looked JJ in the eyes and he wished you didn’t. Because for the first time, he didn’t see the light behind your eyes or the little crinkle in the corner when you smiled. They were dull and lifeless, making him sick to his stomach.

“I didn’t stutter. Did I?” You used his words from the other night and it felt like a stab in the heart to JJ.

JJ was left speechless which almost never happens. He wished he could say something, anything, to make you feel differently, to tell you he was wrong and sorry. But nothing came out. He could barely breathe.

“Hey you crazy kids,” Kie’s voice pierces the air, jokingly and airy. If only she knew that wasn’t how you were feeling.

“Missing a key or something?” John B joked alongside her.

“You should have called us sooner!” Pope added.

When the boat came closer to yours, they finally got a look at the two of you. They were shocked to see you silently crying and looking like all the life had been sucked out of you. JJ looked mad but they couldn’t tell whether he was mad at you or them or himself.

The three of them went sick with anxiety, suddenly wondering if this was a bad idea. Kie tried to get you make eye contact, but you wouldn’t look at her. You couldn’t look at any of them - afraid you might actually break completely if you did.

“Y/N/N...” Kie said softly.

“You guys okay?” John B asked wearily.

JJ helped Pope tie The Pogue to Heyward’s boat and hopped on right after. Pope traded spots with JJ and came up beside you and stood there awkwardly. He didn’t know what to do either.

You looked up at him before he could come up something probably stupid to ask. “Can you drop me off please?”

Pope glanced back at his friends and nodded. “Uh, sure. John B will probably get you there faster though if you -”

“No, it’s okay,” You said. You didn’t think you’d be able to handle being in an enclosed space with JJ for another minute. You just wanted to go home and forget the past two years ever happened. “I’ll stay here.”

Pope shrugged at his friends when you trudged back into the cabin and curled yourself into the corner. You didn’t know what the next few weeks would be like, but you hoped they go better than the last twenty four hours did.

[they-write-once-in-a-blue-moon]

Loved By A Heartbreaker  Chapter Two

Sirius Black x Reader

“...You know sometimes I still get afraid of what’s around me, but I feel safer when I’m with you.”

Chapter One - Chapter Two

Words: 1744

Warnings: The end is angsty fluff and alludes to flashbacks / panic attacks, and I said shit like 3 times

A/N: Sorry it took me like 2 weeks to post this, I wanted to make it good! tags are at the end! Inspiration Playlist

Feedback is always appreciated! Sending love from the moon

- Blue

Lily and James dating was cute Remus being genuinely happy single was sweet Peter trying to date was disturbing at best Sirius trying to date you was tiring

You and Lily were the first out of your friend group to get to the great hall for breakfast. But the calm chatter in the hall was disturbed as The Marauders came racing into the room and sat down as fast as they could.

“Ha! Wormy you lost” Sirius taunted as Peter finally sat down “Have fun cleaning under James’s bed” Peter didn’t seem to care in that moment, he was more focused on not passing out, he was quite the sight, sweating, red faced and panting (Even though it’s not even that far from the Gryffindor Tower to the great hall)

“Seems we got three dogs here by the way he’s panting” James laughed getting playfully shoved by both Sirius and Remus.

“And good morning to you” You and Lily laughed.

Sirius wrapped his arm around your shoulders “Good morning, marshmallow”  No one in the group wasn’t laughing.

“I think that’s the worst one yet Pads” you said as everyone started calming down “Do you even know what a marshmallow is?”

Since Sirius grew up in a very pureblood environment he didn’t know much about the muggle world, cause if he even looked at something not ‘drenched in abracadabra’ he would get punished. So the little he knew mostly came from you and Lily.

“Yes! You use them to make s’mores” He looked rather proud of himself for knowing that “And I call you marshmallow, as I want s’more of you” He winked, everyone at the table was groaning at the pun.

“You’re driving me wild with these nicknames Siri” You shake your head, shrugging his arm off you “And you’re driving me wild” he smirks and winks, he loves twisting your words into a flirt.

“You walked into that one Y/n” James laughed, making the group laugh along with him. The conversation continued cheerfully. Sirius slipping his hand to your knee, you had raised your eyebrow at him, but didn’t move his hand. Just to tease him. Not because it felt nice, cause it didn’t. Right?

A familiar owl flew down to your group, it was The Noble and Most Ancient House of Assholes’s owl, as Sirius untied the letter getting a small nip from the owl, the rest of the group were exchanging knowing looks.

“You don’t have to open it Sirius” Remus gave a smile, everyone went back to their food and didn’t stare or intrude on the conversation.

“I know I don’t have to, and I probably shouldn’t, but what if it’s important?” Sirius turned the letter over, looking at the family's wax stamp. You quickly snatched it from his hand and slid it into your robes

“Important or not, you can read it later. We have History Of Magic in three minutes, and it’s on the other side of the castle, so we better haul ass if we wanna get there in time and not get a detention” Sirius was about to object but before he could, James called “Pads! Wormy! last too class has to clean under Peter’s bed”

And he took off, Sirius going after him straight away “Oi! Tosser that’s cheating!” He calls after him laughing. Peter, who’s face had only just turned back to sickly white. “Why am I always roped into this?” he sighs before taking off as well. You, Lily and Remus smile standing up walking out of the hall “Do you think they’ll realise we have half an hour till class?”

The three of you laugh “Ok, but question for you, why are the consequences cleaning under eachothers beds?” Lily asked 

“There’s some scary shit under them, socks are even too scared to go under them” He almost shudders.

“What do you mean ‘scary shit’? What’s under them?” Lily asked as you turned a corner “You don’t wanna know Lily, I’ve been in there, the beds growl at night” “Wait, why were you in the boys dorm?” She smirks, her mind went to you and Sirius ‘having fun’ yeah no, that will never happen. You and Remus look at eachother, knowing the real reason

You know about Remus’s ‘furry little problem’ and have helped him at night several times, mostly on bad nights when the other boys are exhausted too. You’ll stay there till Remus is asleep and sneak back to your dorm which is difficult, since it looks like Filch’s office is on their floor (It probably is)

You really didn’t want to give Sirius the letter, knowing it would upset him, you just hoped he forgot about it. As curfew hits and the gang are all ‘winding down’ which is doing what you all normally do, just in the common room.

You and Sirius were sitting rather comfortably together, you were on a single armchair and he was on the floor in front of the chair so you could tie it up for bed, so ‘My lushes locks isn’t a mess in the morning’ although he just liked you playing with his hair though (But he would never admit it out loud) . You were the only person he would let touch his hair.

“Hey Y/n? can I have my letter?” He tilted his head up to look at you “Say please” You tease with a smirk, he playfully rolls his eyes at you “Pretty please” he gives you puppy dog eyes, something you could rarely say no to. You pass it to him, pulling his hair out of it’s bun and starting again, giving him head scratches every so often, knowing he loved it when you did that.

He opened it and the classic Sirius grin face fell slightly. He scoffs, throwing the letter into the fire before sitting back against the chair.

“You ok- “ James started after seeing the whole scene play out but Sirius cut him off “Yeah, I’m all good Prongs, just the normal shit, nothing interesting” he shrugs.

The group goes quiet for a moment before Lily fills the silence. “Everyone finished the Herbology paper? It’s due tomorrow” Everyone nodded, except you, your eyes went wide “It’s due tomorrow?” “Yeah?” Lily questions “I thought it was next week! Oh merlin” You slump forward “Welp, I’m going to be up past 3am”

Looking at the clock above the fireplace “Urg, you guys should head to bed. Don’t wanna be around when I have my breakdown” everyone chuckles “You sure you don’t want someone to stay with you?” Remus frowns “I could stay up and help if you want?”

“That’s very kind Rem, but I promise I’ll be ok” You smile “Now go to bed!” You shoo everyone away and summon some parchment, a quill and your Herbology book, before shuffling over to the coffee table by the fire. Sirius came over and sat next to you, before you could object he put his finger to your lips, shushing you “I’m not leaving, don’t bother trying” he smiles with a wink.

The two of you talked for a bit while you did your work, before falling into a comfortable silence. It was nice to have Sirius being chill, not flirting or touching you. Strangely, it made you a bit nervous, something about his postuare, how his hair was a mess. Even though you had just put it up he seemed like he was off in a far away land and not next to you.

“Sirius?” You said softly but he just continued to stare into the fire “Siri?” You repeated a little louder. Still nothing.

“Padfoot?” You used his nickname, maybe that would help bring him out of it quicker but he didn’t even flinch. At this point you were getting scared.

You knew in the back of your head this would be a dumb thing to do. But the stressed out front of your brain was screaming at you to help him. “Pads?” You slowly and gently place your hand on the one Sirius had laid on the table next to you and that snapped him out of it.

He instantly jolted, letting out a snarl and grabbed your wrist in a death grip, his nails digged into your skin, leaving indents on your wrist from his nails. “Siri, It’s just me, Y/n” His brain seemed to be trying to process who you were, but something was clouding his mind.

“Sirius, you're at Hogwarts. It’s just me and you. You are safe” Those last three words seemed to clear his vision. His eyes softened, the tight grip he had on your wrist changed from ‘I’m going to break your wrist’ into ‘I’m going to break’

“Safe?” Sirius whispered so softly you almost missed it.

“Yes safe, you’re safe with me” Moving slowly you take his hand, removing it from breaking your wrist and intertwining your fingers together, giving his hand a soft reassuring squeeze. “I’m safe.” This time it was more like he was making a statement to himself. You gave him a gentle smile and nodded your head.

You placed your other hand to his cheek, he flinched at first but when he realized you weren’t going to hurt him. He leaned into your hand closing his eyes.

That gesture is what made a tear fall down your cheek. That this hurt and scared boy trusted you enough to close his eyes. Knowing you weren’t going to hurt him in any way. Knowing you would only do the opposite, keep him safe from harm, you pull him into a hug, he buries his face in the crook of your neck and bunches your shirt in his hands.

“You know sometimes I still get afraid of what’s around me, but I feel safer when I’m with you.” He mumbled as he started to settle down, it was clear that he was still shaken by whatever he was thinking about, but being in your warm embrace, mixed with your words, he felt safe.

“You know, Sirius, I’m gonna be real with you. Sometimes I find you a real pain in the arse, but in all honesty you’re one of my closest friends. And I hope you know I’m always here for you” you gave him a small kiss on his temple, you knew he didn’t want pity, in fact he hated being pitied, he needed a friend.

Sirius Black is going to be safe with you

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[thisdiscontentedwinter]

hunger - chapter 2

Hunger master post. 

The dog is still breathing when Stiles clambers out of the back of the SUV that hit it. The driver is in shock, and has been apologizing profusely ever since it happened. And Stiles knows it’s not the guy’s fault. The dog was going for the man who’d hurt Stiles in the alley, and ran out in front of the SUV. Which makes this Stiles’s fault, doesn’t it?

The animal clinic isn’t open, but there’s a light on inside and someone moving around, so Stiles bangs on the door. It’s opened by a dark-haired boy who looks no older than him.

“My dog,” is all Stiles manages to get out before he’s crying again.

The boy and the driver carry the dog inside on a picnic blanket from the back of the driver’s SUV, and into the examination room. Stiles curls his fingers through the dog’s ruff, and leans down close to his ear to whisper to him again how sorry he is.

The driver slips toward the door, and Stiles thinks about chasing after him for a second and demanding he pay the bill for whatever this is going to cost, but what if the guy refuses? Then the dark-haired boy will know Stiles has no money.

“It’s okay,” he whispers to the dog instead. “You’ll be okay.”

The dark-haired boy checks for a heartbeat. “His heart sounds good,” he says. He runs his hands though the dog’s fur. “I think maybe his leg is broken, and some ribs?” His forehead wrinkles with a frown as he carefully manipulates the dog’s hind leg. “Actually, maybe it’s not a break. I should really call my boss in. I just work here after school.”

“Vet school?” Stiles asks, still sniffling.

“High school,” the boy answers. He wrinkles his nose as he presses his knuckles gently against the dog’s ribcage. “I could have sworn I felt a break a second ago. He really needs an x-ray.”

Stiles nods, despite the jolt of worry that goes through him. He can’t afford that. He’s got three dollars and seventy cents in the pocket of his jeans. He’s got nothing. And, when the boy turns his worried gaze from the dog to Stiles, and rakes it down his body, he knows he can tell.

It doesn’t matter how clean Stiles tries to keep himself. It doesn’t matter if he washes his spare shirt under the faucet in the diner bathroom every few days. He’s still filthy. He can’t remember the last time he showered, or washed his hair. He can’t remember the last time he ate something that wasn’t greasy or half-rotten. He knows he looks like shit. He knows he probably stinks like shit too, and so does the dog.

The boy runs his fingers through the dog’s fur again. “Is this a wolf hybrid?”

“I don’t…I don’t know.”

The boy casts him a worried look. “You’re not supposed to own them in California.”

Stiles feels a sudden flash of panic. He moves forward and nudges the boy out of the way. “We’ll go. We’ll just go.”

The dog blinks his eyes open and fixes his gaze on Stiles.

“Dude,” the boy says, sounding reproachful and regretful all at once, “I’m not going to report you. Just, if anyone finds out, he might get seized and put down.”

The dog rumbles out a growl.

“He’s fine,” Stiles says, his voice catching. “He’s fine, right?”

 “Um… I guess?” The boy looks puzzled. “He looked pretty bad when you got him here though. I really should call my boss.”

“No!” Stiles tugs at the dog’s ruff. “Come on. Come on, boy. Please get up. Come on.”

The dog rumbles again.

The boy puts a hand on Stiles’s shoulder. “Dude, don’t freak out, okay? I won’t call my boss if you don’t want me to. I won’t…” He chews his bottom lip for a moment. “You’re homeless, right?”

Stiles feels stripped bare, cold and naked. His breath hitches, and he jerks his chin in a nod.

“Look,” the boy says, squaring his shoulders. “I’m gonna give your dog some fluids, no charge, because I can really use the practice, and my mom packed me some dinner that I haven’t eaten yet. You want some?”

Stiles blinks at him for a moment. “What?”

“Homemade tamales,” the boy says, and wrinkles his nose. “I’m Scott, by the way.”

“St-Stiles,” Stiles says, his heart thumping loudly.

***

 The wolf’s boy is called Stiles.

The wolf huffs at that.

Stiles.

What is a Stiles?

A Stiles is pack. A Stiles is salt tears and smiles. A Stiles is skinny fingers that taste like the grease from burgers, and clothes that smell of stale sweat. A Stiles is feet that fall into step with the wolf’s own. A Stiles is amber eyes and pale skin and moles. A Stiles is a tug on the wolf’s instincts, on his aching heart. A Stiles is pack.

Stiles sits on the floor of the surgery, pressed up against the wolf’s side, and shares his tamales with the wolf while Scott cleans up. Scott has shaved a tiny patch of fur on the wolf’s foreleg. There’s a canula taped to the pale skin underneath, and a tube attached to a bag of some liquid that’s feeding slowly into the wolf. It smells strange, but it doesn’t make the wolf feel sick. If anything, it seems to speed his healing.

“I work here on Mondays, Wednesdays and Thursdays after school,” Scott says as he works. “Mostly I just clean out the cages and feed the animals after my boss finishes up for the day. I also call him in if any emergencies turn up. I’m usually here until about nine. I’m here on Sunday afternoons as well, to walk the dogs that need walking, and feed whoever needs feeding.”

The wolf rests his chin on the floor and watches Scott through narrow eyes.

“So, you know,” Scott says to Stiles, “if you wanted to stop by, I could check out how your dog’s going. What’s his name, by the way?”

The wolf and his boy exchange a look.

“He, um, he doesn’t really have a name,” Stiles says at last. “I don’t own him or anything. We look after each other.”

Scott pauses with a bottle of antiseptic spray in his hand. “Oh.”

“He found me when I was sick,” Stiles says, “and brought me food.”

Scott’s jaw drops and his eyes widen. “Seriously? That’s amazing.”

The wolf huffs.

Stiles smiles at him. “Yeah, he’s pretty amazing.”

The wolf growls softly, and Stiles shares another tamale with him.

 ***

 The wolf distrusts Scott McCall, even though he smells like the truth. The wolf distrusts everyone, and hot jealousy burns in his belly when he sees the way that his boy unfolds in Scott’s presence, the hard lines and angles of his body relaxing into something softer, something sweeter, the way he does when he’s sprawled out asleep beside the wolf. The wolf doesn’t like that Scott McCall can inspire that same instinctive trust in his boy.

His boy—his Stiles—is pack.

Scott is not pack.

The wolf is a simple creature who makes simple calculations.

He doesn’t like Scott. He doesn’t want his boy to make connections here in the town. He and the boy need to go into the woods where it is safer. They need to build a den there and hunt for prey and never come into the oil-grease-smoke-stench of the town again. Nothing grows in the town. Nothing thrives here. Death stalks them both in the town.

In the woods there will be no talk of money or guns.

In the woods there will be no deputies peering into the dark after them.

In the woods there will be no narrow-eyed men who try to push Stiles to his knees.

In the woods they will be safe.

The wolf growls when Scott removes the canula from his foreleg, and bares his teeth when the boy runs his hands over him, unasked and unwelcome, feeling for damage that has long since healed.

“I should call him Mr. Cranky Pants,” Stiles says, and Scott laughs.

The wolf turns his face away.

“Hey.” Stiles kneels on the floor in front of him, and presses their foreheads together. “I was just teasing. Just teasing.” His breath is hot against the wolf’s fur. He lays a trembling hand against the wolf’s shoulder. “You saved me. You saved me, okay? Tonight, and every night, you save me.”

The wolf closes his eyes and sighs, content.

 ***

 It’s late when they get back to their alley, and Stiles has a belly full of food, a hoodie that Scott promised he didn’t need, and a bundle of sample packs of dog treats that he and the dog are totally going to share. It’s less gross than eating out of a trashcan. Slightly less gross, anyway.

He and the dog curl up behind their cardboard shelter, and lean into one another. It’s another cold night. Stiles wears Scott’s hoodie over his own and tugs the sleeves down to cover his hands.

He’s tired.

It’s been three months, give or take, since he ran from his last placement. There’s a weird sort of hierarchy in foster home placements that Stiles has become intimately familiar with over the past four years. Get a reputation as a troublemaker, as a habitual runaway, and the good families aren’t interested. Or the case workers don’t want to punish them or scare them off by sending them the worst kids, at least. His last few homes, Stiles figures he would have run from anyway, even if he didn’t have something to run toward. It would have been enough to just get the fuck out.

There were…incidents.

And so he’d run.

He’d made it all the way back to Beacon Hills this time. He had no money, and not much of a plan, but it was this or stay in that fucking house and flinch every time he heard the floorboards creak outside his bedroom at night.

It wasn’t…it wasn’t bad. It never came to anything, but no fucking question that’s where it was headed. Stiles had woken up twice to find his foster mother’s boyfriend standing naked in his doorway, dick in hand, and what? He was going to wait around to see how that turned out? Fuck that. He’d take his chances on the streets, thanks.

He swallows around the lump in his throat.

Except how well is that going for him? He’d almost got the dog killed tonight. And the dog saved his life when he was sick, and saved him again tonight. The dog is his best friend. The dog is his only friend. 

The dog is the only creature who has made Stiles feel safe in four long years, since he was dragged screaming out of his dad’s arms by a court orderly.

His eyes sting at the memory.

“Stiles. Stiles, kiddo. It’ll be okay. You’ll be okay.”

Such a lie. Such a dirty fucking lie. The last thing his dad ever said to him, and it was a lie. It’s not the sort of lie Stiles can hate him for though. Not when he knows it killed his dad to say it as much as it killed Stiles to hear it.

He closes his eyes and hot tears slide down his cheeks.

The dog licks them away.

“It was supposed to be easy,” Stiles says at last, opening his eyes. The dog cocks his ears and looks at him intently. “Coming back to Beacon Hills.” He sighs. “But everything looks really different than I remember. It’s been so long. How am I supposed to figure it out?” He shivers, and curls closer to the dog. “How am I supposed to make it right?”

[justachorusgirl96]

Shower Surprise

Author’s notes: Ok, so I’ve hardly written anything other than research papers and the only creative writing I’ve done was also mandatory for school, so this is definitely a first for me. I just got this idea in my head and couldn’t get rid of it. So I figured, why not write it down? Here it is, I hope it doesn’t totally suck and that you enjoy it. Please send me feedback. Like seriously, let me know what you think and send me any suggestions that might improve my writing. It’s going to be a series, I don’t know how many parts it will have. I’ll just keep writing until an ending comes to me or you all tell me it sucks and I decide to stop torturing you with it.

I was inspired by @sdavid09 and @ravengirl94. They are amazing writers and I love their works.

Summary: You’re taking a shower after a bad hunt and fantasizing about a certain archangel, when it accidentally turns into a prayer, one that he answers.

Warnings: Nudity, injury, violence, strong language, smutt-ish stuff, eventual loss of virginity to the devil. If I missed something let me know and I’ll add it.

Word count: 2504

Pairing: Reader x Lucifer

A/n: If you want to be tagged let me know!

Part 2

“Ughh…” You gritted out as you leaned forward into the shower stream to allow it to flow over your face and down your back, washing away all grime of today’s hunt. You watched as the water, heavily tinted with blood, swirled around your feet before rushing down the drain. Damn, you had hated vampires from day one, but especially so right now. 

 You hardly ever joined the brothers on a hunt, and it was even rarer for you to join in the fighting. You had been with them ever since the boys saved you from a douche bag of a vampire bent on turning you all those years ago. You found a niche with the Winchesters by holding down the bunker and doing research. You cleaned, cooked, made supply runs, and cared for the boys and anyone else in the strange extended family who happened to stop by. But your passion was digging through the lore and finding solutions and information to help Sam and Dean. Which really worked out in your favor since you were never much of a fighter, not physically at least, and you were a lot more afraid of facing the things that go bump than the boys were. You only assisted in that regard when they were really desperate; like they had been today. 

 You were pretty beat up to say the least. Two vamps got the jump on you and gave you a thorough ass beating before the boys could give you any backup. You had several large gashes and dark purple bruises covering your ribs and back, a few down on your legs as well. Sam stitched you up as best as he could, but you knew you would take a long time to recover. So you just stood there, with your arms braced against the back of the shower, allowing the hot water to roll over your face and let your mind wander to anything but today. Wander… wander… and damn if it didn’t wander somewhere you didn’t really want it to go; right to Lucifer.

Your mind had been wandering to Lucifer more and more here lately and you just couldn’t understand why. You hadn’t known him as long as Sam and Dean. You weren’t a hunter yet when they started, and ended, the Apocalypse. But you were around, and right in the middle of the whole mess with Amara. You had been down in Hell when Cas and Sam ended up in the cage with him; you spent countless hours trying to track him down and get him out of Cas; and you had been stuck in the middle of Lucifer, Chuck, and the boys as they were trying to sort out their issues and get their shit together to stop Amara. Why did it seem like you were the only one with a level head in this weird family?

Lucifer had never exactly been nice to you, but he was always less harsh than he was with everyone else, but since Chuck and Amara had made up and Chuck ordered him to stay with you guys, he had become more and more pleasant, kind even, at least to you. He was still a snarky ass for the most part, but the two of you had become friends of sorts. It showed most in the way he actually helped you around the bunker, even if it was just sitting in the library with you as you did research so you weren’t there all alone; and he always answered your prayers much in the same way Cas always answered Dean’s.

But the way you had been thinking about him lately was… different. It was more fantasizing than anything else and it made you uncomfortable when you realized you were doing it. Why did his Nick vessel have to be so damn attractive? You always forced yourself to think of something different when you caught yourself doing it; but not this time. You allowed yourself to give in as the sound of the shower filled your ears and drowned out the world. The way he towered over almost everyone else, over you, damn he was huge. About how tight his pants were, especially in the front, giving your imagination plenty of fuel. About how nice it would be to have him hold you in his arms; or pin you to the bed while he…

What the fuck is that?!

Why did these weekly meetings about the current state of Hell have to be so boring? Holy fuck, is he actually still talking?, Lucifer wondered as he half listened to the demon standing before him, apparently still giving some sort of presentation about soul collection numbers. He only attended these meetings because out of necessity to reinforce that he was king; that and apparently it was frowned upon for a king to be completely disconnected from his subjects. So he showed up every week and sat on the throne in front of a committee of what he believed to be the dumbest demons Hell had to offer. Maybe I should just kill him and be done with it… 

Lucifer’s mind wandered quite a bit during this meeting, as it did in every meeting, as he was only half listening to what his idiotic minions had to say. He thought about a wide variety of things, from new ways to torture Crowley, to why humans were so fascinated with the one they called “The Science Guy.” But often his thoughts were turned towards a very particular hunter he knew. You were constantly on his mind, and he had no idea why. He was drawn to you and often wondered if you felt the same pull towards him. The harder he tried not to think about you, the more he inevitably did. The way your hair would fall across your face as you read… How you always smelled of old books and cinnamon… How the shirts you wore always conformed so snugly to your figure…

I’ve had about as much of this as I can stomach, Lucifer decided as he shifted in his seat, preparing to obliterate the moron who was still somehow rambling on when suddenly he heard it; a prayer, your prayer, to him and he froze. It wasn’t a prayer of words, but of intense need and urgency and… desire? He thought he had felt it before, short bursts of this intense feeling, but they were fleeting and he always wrote them off as nothing more than his desire for a good excuse to leave; but not this time. This time there was no mistaking it for an overactive imagination. It was coming through loud and clear, growing stronger every minute. Forgetting that that he was in a meeting, Lucifer took off at once for the source of the prayer.

Boy was he in for a shock when he landed. What the fu—ah… Lucifer suddenly found himself standing behind you in the back of your shower, being hit by the few errant jets of water that sprayed too far out from the shower head. It took him a moment to realize where he was, but when he did he froze. There you were, standing in front of him and leaning against the back of the shower, completely exposed and… and… What the fuck happened to you?! You were in the worst state he had ever seen you in; there were livid bruises everywhere, an alarming number of deep gashes mingled throughout, and he could even sense a few fractures. He remembered you mentioning that the boys needed you to help with some fieldwork on a hunt, but how could they let this happen?

As he stood there looking at you, Lucifer began to feel a fire beginning to rise up within him, but it wasn’t just anger. He had always been able to fight down this strange feeling you seemed to trigger in him, but not this time. Injured as you were, being here and seeing you like this, still feeling your prayer of nothing but need for him, it was affecting him. Lucifer noticed that it was causing a physical reaction as well; the front of his jeans began to grow tighter and stretch to accommodate this new change. He snapped his fingers ever so softly, instantly removing his clothes to see what was happening to himself. Interesting, he thought, turning his attention back to you. There would be time to explore this new feeling later, but now you needed his healing; without hesitation, Lucifer reached out as he felt your prayer beginning to wane and placed his hand right between your shoulder blades and allowed his grace to flow out and repair all the damage of this hunt. 

You had been so lost in your fantasy that you didn’t hear the familiar rustle of wings as Lucifer landed behind you. And you certainly didn’t hear the soft snap of his fingers as he removed his clothes. You did, however, feel his hand when he placed it on your back, sending you into panic mode. What the fuck is that was all you had time to think before you felt it, that ice cold wave of relief that washed over you, soothing every ache and injury before it withdrew and you felt the hand leave your back. You barely had time to process that you had just been healed when you heard a familiar voice come from behind you.

“What have those idiots done to you?!” 

“Ah!” You let out a small cry and jumped, nearly causing you to slip and fall. The slick floor of the shower made it difficult for you to turn with any sort of dignity or grace, but you were too flustered to care about that at the moment. As you came to a stop finally facing him you threw out your left arm to brace yourself against the side of the shower. There he was, just standing there staring down at you with anger and concern and something you couldn’t quite place all mingled in his eyes. “Lucifer, what the fu–” you started, but were quickly cut off as he reached forward to try to turn you from side to side and examine you. “Hey, cut it out! And what the fuck are you doing here?” You demanded as you unsuccessfully tried to pull away, almost falling for a second time, which only made Lucifer tighten his grip on your arm. 

“Y/N, what do you mean, what am I doing here? You were the one who prayed to me, I was just responding to it,” he countered, but his tone had softened and taken on a note of confusion. Finally satisfied that you were completely healed, he released you and stopped his examination. You already had your usual attitude back which he took as a good sign. Unfortunately, that, combined with seeing your naked body healed and in glistening in the stream of the shower only stoked the new fire burning in his gut, and pushed his physical reaction further. He stared down at you and tried to keep his blue eyes locked on to your Y/E/C ones, afraid you might notice them wander. You didn’t seem to realize yet that you were both standing there naked and only a foot or so apart; that was about to change.

‘You were the one that prayed to me…’ What did that mean? You hadn’t been praying; you were… Oh no. “I-I didn’t mean to pray, it was an accident. I was just…” You started to stammer out in response, but when you broke eye contact to look down in your embarrassment you finally noticed the elephant in the room. You were naked; naked in front of your favorite archangel. And so was he! You had intended to look at the floor, but instead ended up staring right at his massive erection. You were only stunned momentarily, suddenly remembering your own exposed state. Removing your left arm from the wall of the shower, you threw it across your breasts, while simultaneously using your right hand to cover your crotch as best you could. 

“Lucifer, seriously what the fuck?!” You shouted as you took a half step back and redirected your attention from his cock back to his face, just in time to see disappointment flit across his face before he resumed his usual mask of indifference. 

“I really don’t know why you’re so worked up. You were the one who wanted me here so badly I heard it as a prayer, which I was gracious enough to answer, hence the fact that I am here. And I may not have much experience with showers, but I do know that no one takes one with their clothes on, so I decided to do away with them.” Lucifer answered, his voice condescending as ever. “But,” he continued, “you still haven’t  answered my question. What have those damned idiots done to you?”

You stiffened as the tone of his voice quickly changed. There was no mistaking the anger in his words. Why did he care if you were hurt on a hunt? He didn’t even like humans. He just disliked you less than most of the others, right?

“They haven’t done anything to me.” You shot at him. “A few vamps got the drop on me because I wasn’t paying enough attention; it was my fault and if Sam and Dean hadn’t…”

“If Sam and Dean hadn’t drug you out into danger where you don’t belong then you wouldn’t have gotten hurt in the first place!” Lucifer cut you off, his anger taking the forefront of his emotions. Why did you always defend them like this when they didn’t even realize or appreciate your value? He had placed his hands on his hips and was leaning forward, bringing his face down and closer to yours. You were frustratingly short at times.

“What do you mean ‘where I don’t belong’? I’m a hunter! That’s exactly where I belong!” You we’re yelling quite loudly by this point, but you didn’t care. Your room was furthest from the main room and no one was going to hear you over whatever they were doing. Forgetting your nudity, you placed your hands on your hips and took an angry step forward, almost closing the space between you. You stood on your tip-toes, bringing your face within inches of his. Trying to bring your anger under control you dropped your voice back to a more normal volume, but there was no mistaking the anger and indignation that dripped from your words. “Just because I don’t go out and fight very often doesn’t mean I can’t handle myself! The boys needed help and they had no one else to ask so I went. I’m a grown ass woman and I can do that if I want to. What does it even matter to you anyways? Why do you care if I get a little hurt on a hunt?”

@sdavid09