#this version of fernando alonso is my fave

[mediumtires]

YEEHAW

[racingliners]

F1 Re-Watch 2022: Round 17 - Singapore

My joy of joys that we’re on Singapore, hands down one of my all time fave tracks, I love it so much. Even if it hasn’t always loved me back (no we do not discuss Singapore 2017 in this house).

Anyway, I once again remember nothing, literally nothing. My head is very empty. Apart from having a vague awareness of Perez winning??? (And Seb’s unbelievably stunning black and rainbow helmet) So, let’s jump right in!

Do I mainly love Singapore bc the Marina Bay circuit is very pretty? Maybe, you can’t judge me

I find it very wild I didn’t watch Singapore highlights last year though, considering it’s one of my favourite races, that was either very dumb on my part, or I was Going Through Stuff™️

Anyway, intro done, circuit shots preeeeeeeeeetty

IT RAINED BEFORE THE RACE?!

oh god I’m having 2017 flashbacks

“it is greasy and it is slippy” nope, no, I don’t want

f u c k 🥲

right, let’s see if I survive finding out the starting grid

Seb in P13, I will take it

“The most successful driver in Singapore” you’re damn right he is THAT’S MY BOY

LEWIS P3 HELL YEAH

oh. Leclerc pole. So he doesn’t win then?

it’s sparkly gold helmet is very pretty though

“We saw Ted Kravitz slipping and sliding on the grid” The things he sacrifices for F1

[Formation Lap]: welp the track is still damp, everyone is on inters and there’s a fair amount of spray coming off them

ughhhhhhhhh

the wide city/circuit shots are still gorgeous though. The Singapore GP may occasional be messy but boy she is beautiful.

“Number 350, let’s make it a special one” I hope that doesn’t age too poorly

also DAMN Fernando save some race starts for the rest of us?

“Let’s keep our fingers crossed we don’t get a repeat of 2017″ SHUT UP CROFTY I DON’T WANT TO THINK ABOUT IT

[Start/Lap 1]: ew Verstappen took the lead at the start

but no carnage!!!! F1 taketh away and F1 giveth

wait it was PEREZ???? HOW????

It is indeed Perez I am very unobservant, soz

SEB INTO P8!!!! THAT’S MY LION OF SINGAPORE

[Lap 2]: A clean first lap??? around Singapore??? I am SHOCKED

No don’t show Verstappen talk more about Seb

anyway helmet watch: rainbow helmet (sparkly version). ily Lewis

oof Ferrari was a tractor in the second part of the start. yikes.

[Lap 3]: Lewis wanted to start on the full wets???? Bestie no. Bono talk some sense into your man pls.

[Lap 4]: anyway he’s in P4 still gotta take those positives

[Lap 5]: Verstappen under a second behind Seb. nein danke.

No one is allowed to overstake Seb at Singapore it’s in the regs.

[Lap 6]: “They’re [Seb and Verstappen] three seconds slower than the leaders” we know the AMR22 was a tractor, I don’t need reminding.

“Vettel gaining a bit on Pierre Gasly” Seb I love you SO MUCH

[Lap 7]: Death, taxes, and Kevin getting a black and orange flag at the start of a race

Seb onboard FINALLY

I said it already but his helmet for this race was STUNNING

Noooo Zhou’s stopped and Nicky has a puncture. Bother.

Oh, they collided. BOYS 😭

[Lap 8]: Aaaaaaaand full safety car. Death, taxes, and there being at least one safety car the Singapore Grand Prix.

Nicky DNF 😔

[Lap 9]: oh not a replay of Russell and Bottas violence vzsdjvzbah

fellas

“No one’s been lapped, no one needs to unlap themselves” Crofty I swear I will pay you to stop mentioning a certain race I do not want reminded about

[Lap 10]: Safety car in at the end of the lap. I’m slightly stressed.

[Lap 11]: A CLEAN RESTART. I AM ASTOUNDED.

Does... does everyone have their braincells??? at the same time??? amazing

ew Verstappen passed Seb

also stop talking about title permutations I don’t want to know.

Livery watch: There’s pink accents on the McLaren instead of the light blue??? You know what I dig it

[Lap 12]: Verstappen behind Alonso? *grabs popcorn*

oh Lewis didn’t want full wets the beef was over a new or used set of inters. Thank goodness. Bono can come talk some sense into me instead.

[Lap 13]: Anyway, Alonso v Verstappen watch. It’s like a simmering pot.

Lewis within a second of Sainz? Seb six tenths behind Gasly? Let’s get it lads.

[Lap 14]: “The straight line speed of the Red Bull is faster than the straight line speed of the Alpine” Really Crofty??? You don’t say... /s

[Lap 16]: I hate to say it but... nothing much is happening my friends 😭

It seems like the track is starting to properly dry out since drivers are being asked to look for puddles to cool the tyres, but it’s obviously nowhere near slicks territory yet

Marina Bay Street Circuit 🤝 my hair: taking forever to dry 

[Lap 17]: Oh!!! I see a hint of a dry line!!

and yet, in other places we still have small puddles

[Lap 18]: Oh no Russell is behind Bottas, boys please, don’t be violent.

[Lap 19]: Oh to be a Ferrari mechanic, sweeping water out of the pitbox

Verstappen is still behind Alonso. Fernando is powered on spite alone I feel.

“It’s a really cautious race” Yeah, at least the track is pretty though

[Lap 20]: Almost third distance klaxon!!!!

maybe I’m very biased but I do love watching the cars drive round Singapore, it is hands down the best street circuit on the calendar. Every street track wishes it was Marina Bay.

“It’ll be a brave person who switches to slicks” *cuts to the Merc garage prepping tyres* oh no

“Whenever Perez has led more than 15 laps of a race he’s gone on to win it” oh that is a fun fact actually

[Lap 21]: Alonso DNF. The pre-start team radio did age like milk.

VSC, are we gonna get a pitstop shuffle?

oof the engine just died on the spot. yikes.

eesh Yuki nearly ended up in the wall

[Lap 22]: Russell pits 👀👀👀👀👀

HE’S ON SLICKS

ohhhhhhh boy, inch resting

“That’s brave at the moment” This is the one time I will agree with Verstappen. You may note the date and time.

cut to Shov on the pitwall trying to look unbothered

“No grip” pretends to be shocked

[Lap 24]: ooh Lewis closing the gap to Sainz

OH Lance is up to P9!!!! Please let us have double AM points.

no rain anywhere on the radar thank goodness.

[Lap 25]: “We are not event at half race distance” ...I know

[Lap 26]: Yellow flag sector two???

Noooo Alex in the wall

oh okay he’s back driving he just doesn’t have a front wing

VSC 2 electric boogaloo

oh no the Ferrari mechanics are standing by the tyres.

phew no one pitted.

Alex DNF 😭

OH SHIT this is his first race after his whole hospital fiasco, jeez louise

[Lap 27]: VSC ended, I’m starting to see more of a dry line before turn 8

[Lap 28]: Oh I didn’t even notice Sainz being 15 secs behind Leclerc. yikes.

and Ocon is vibing in the run off?? Also a bit smoky.

Oh. Alpine went poof. 

VSC 3!! Give it up for VSC 3!!

[Lap 29]: yikes you can see the oil the Alpine is leaking as it gets rolled back. That was not a happy Renault engine.

Down to 15 runners. 

Bono sighting!!!!! 

[Lap 30]: Lewis do not overtake under the VSC pls.

aaaaaaand VSC ended let’s zoom

or not the track is still not dry enough for slicks

oh not a replay of Norris and Verstappen nearly crashing at the restart.

cut to displeased McLaren mechanics.

[Lap 31]: Seb still in P8, an unbothered king

wait have we even had DRS this race???? I don’t recall seeing a graphic for it

Livery watch: The RBR livery is so dull I want to cry. Bring back the glossy metallic blue PLEASE

[Lap 32]: Please tell Ted how much I love his long winded analogies

also HALF RACE DISTANCE KLAXON!!!

its_been_84_years.gif

and we have indeed not had any DRS, cheers Brundle

[Lap 33]: LEWIS NO

Oh thank fuck he’s gotten going again but SHIT

argh his front wing is damaged.

meanwhile Russell fastest sector 2. It may be slicks time.

The duality of Mercedes AMG F1.

[Lap 34]: Lewis’ front wing is starting to fall apart, Gasly has pitted for slicks. We are going from 0 to 100 VERY FAST

Yeah Russell fastest sector 1 it’s slicks time

Everybody do the PIT STOP SHUFFLE *70′s Disco music starts blaring*

Leclerc, Yuki, Bottas, Kevin, Lewis and Seb have pitted.

half a second Seb sighting I’ll take it

[Lap 36]: And Perez pits

Sainz too, I’m guessing Norris, Verstappen, Lance and Dan aren’t far behind.

Yellow flag sector 2. 

YUKI NO

WE’VE HIT 100 AND I DON’T LIKE IT

Safety Car 2 - Electric Boogaloo

huh McLaren are the only cars to not have pitted.

...until now, mechanics in the pitlane 

[Lap 37]: “I’m always here for you Crofty” oh Ted

“Don’t sweat it Lewis, we’re still in it mate” oh 🥺

seriously where do I get an emotional support Bono?

So, everyone is on the mediums apart from Dan and Bottas who are on softs, inch resting

[Lap 38]: Bernd Maylander for Driver of the Day

oh and we’re back with the 2hr countdown (37-ish mins left). I’m going to try very hard to keep track of the lap count, unlike what I did with Monaco.

(my apologies in advance if the liveblog goes to pot from here)

okay so Ferrari think a long safety car as opposed to a red flag to fix the barriers.

[Lap 39]: no don’t show sad Yuki 😭

oh Safety Car ending, alright then

“Respect the distance with the safety car” yes now is not the time for crimes Checo

[Lap 40]: Mostly clean restart thus far 

Wait when did Lance get up to P7????

anyway Seb still P8

VERSTAPPEN STRAIGHT DOWN THE RUN OFF WHAT

Anyway AM P6 and P7 now, double points pls

[Lap 41]: oh no Perez got noted for a Safety Car infringement

I SAID NOW WASN’T THE TIME FOR CRIMES FFS

And Russell has a rear puncture. Zero braincells found anywhere post-restart

Russell on Mick violence? fuck off

[Lap 42]: ANYWAY, Charles is catching Perez???

👀

Noooooo Mick’s going slowly now

[Lap 43]: Oh Charles and Perez are very close

Thankfully Mick just pitted and is still in the race

...Perez has an engine issue????

DRS Enabled 👀👀👀

alrightly then

aw Seb’s in 7th and Lewis in 8th, the mates that race together stay together

[Lap 44]: I find it very wild that we only have 14 cars left this race has certainly been SOMETHING

[Lap 45]: and we’re seemingly at 75% race distance, huzzah!!

meanwhile Charles is hunting Perez for sport at this point they’re SO CLOSE

gap still under a second

[Lap 46]: I feel like playing jaws music over this battle would be more fitting

lol I just realised we have the two Ferraris, both McLarens, and Lance and Seb in sequence. Something something Noah’s arc

Fastest sector 1 Charles, come onnnnnn

gap 6 tenths!!!

[Lap 47]: Oh there’s a definite dry line on the track now. It’s about bloody time.

20 mins left, and we are at full points distance!

[Lap 48]: Charles is painfully close to Perez at this point

Physically I’m in the living room, mentally I’m cursing RBR’s straight line speed.

cut to a somewhat stressed Ferrari pitwall

hmph Charles’ gap is suddenly 1.4 seconds. I should not have gotten my hopes up.

[Lap 49]: “Mick Schumacher will continue to drive like it’s the race of his life” AS HE SHOULD stfu Russell

“If they’re going to put a penalty on they should do it during the race” You run on the assumption that race control and the stewards have a braincell between them. They don’t.

[Lap 50]: oh of course Perez is getting investigated after the race. ffs.

[Lap 51]: Don’t have Horner talking over Lewis and Bono. RUDE.

[Lap 52]: 10 mins left, will Perez get a five second gap? Just when you thought the race had reached it’s drama quota.

oh Merc pitting Russell to steal the fastest lap off Perez. This is why I hate the “you only get the FL point of you’re in the Top 10″ bullshit bc???? The fastest lap is the fastest lap wherever you finish get over yourselves FIA and let whoever gets it have a point it is not that hard.

[Lap 53]: Verstappen following Lewis who’s following Seb. *yells*

AND YET there’s still damp patches on the track. madness.

[Lap 54]: Seb just drag Lewis away pleeeease

ngl this three car battle is a bit spicy

[Lap 55]: Just a handful of tenths between them. damn.

Lance in front of all of them, unbothered

[Lap 56]: 2 mins left.

Oh how I’ve missed watching Lewis and Seb race

aaaaand Lewis went wide and Verstappen got through. It was fun while it lasted 😭

[Lap 57]: Perez has pulled a 5 second gap over Leclerc. ffs.

The clock hit zero. Are we done??? Do we have an extra lap??? What I do know is that I’m sure my lap count is off.

“Vettel is defending brilliantly here” INJECT IT!!!!

[Final Lap]: Verstappen got past Seb. Rude, he broke the team by team formation.

And I was right, Perez did win! Charles P2, Sainz P3.

But most importantly DOUBLE ASTON POINTS!!!!! TEAM GREEEEEEEEN!!!!!!!

WELL. That was a race. Honestly it felt like two different races in one. Everything after the second (??) safety car was somewhat insane. Though everything before that? ehhhh. Though I’m not surprised that 2022 managed to give us a partially dull Singapore GP.

Solid 7 front wings out of 10. Next race - Japan!