#this turned into a meta of sorts

[aquarian-queen]

Unraveling the Twisted Dance: Writing Troy and Cristine's (OC) Dynamic

Okay, so since I mentioned in my last post that I used Troy's dynamic with the Fear OGs (Madison and Nick mostly) together with Daniel's insights on how he interacts with others I want to share my thought process when writing that with Troy and my Oc: Cristine. At its core their relationship is messed- it's starts as manipulation and survival!

I tried to be deliberate where it's really the tiny interactions that already means so much. (i mean it took these two dorks 4 books to finally kiss lmaoo the slow burn of this series is insane when i can be an impatient person). Troy and Cristine are both kinda messed up, and once they become friends it's still built on deep psychological and survival-esqe manipulations that they started with as enemies. It's like they can't help but mess with each other's heads! And eapecially Troy loves that so much, this back and forth and game because he never had it. While Cristine is more emotionally mature, and it is tiring for her, she is competitive and fights back by making sure she is never the underdog (because of her past). So it is a constant who can up the other dynamic, which was oddly what brought them together in the end.

At this point in my story, Troy is going through a crazy change. He used to be all about surviving, and even using the game of manipulation to protect this growing bond with Cristine from friends to something word. From my POV its his weird way of showing affection and loyalty by trying to be her person while he tries to grasp what all these new emotions are, and it's gotten dark multiple times in my book so trigger warning for who does want to read.

Cristine and Troy's whole dynamic is like a rollercoaster of emotions. Sometimes you can't tell if they're loyal to each other or just using each other to survive. Troy's always pulling strings to keep Cristine on his side, especially when others get in the way and want to ruin it. It's like his first understanding and step of 'love' until he actually finds out what that actually means. Which is what I am exploring with him and my OC right now.

[juniemunie]

[Abandoned by the Lightners, his heart became cracked with hatred.]

Hitting a lil' too close to home?

[vaguely-concerned]

on the one hand I think inner demons could stand to have a bit more romanced rook specific content, but on the other hand the underlying in-built implication that 'yours is the one true voice of comfort and safety in my inner world' is a sentiment and intimacy so way beyond the romantic or the platonic or any secret third thing you could care to name that it makes me lose my entire poor little mind a bit. it's so big and fundamental — near-existential — that in that exact moment at least the distinctions kind of seem irrelevant.

all the people lucanis' mind conjures up along the way are relationships he has that are unavoidably mixed and fraught in some ways even when they're also full of love (they are fraught BECAUSE they're full of love) — the good in them inseparable from things that hurt him at the same time. (it's about: the basic disorganized attachment patterns this poor guy is dragging around with him. careful with those, they're dellamorte heirlooms. what you love also inevitably hurts you and you won't be allowed to have one without the other, you have to surrender parts of your soul to hold on to what little you have left: this is the story up until now.) and the idea that rook isn't that to him — that beneath the fear of wanting them when romanced (which is more its own separate thing because within this psychology, actively wanting something and not just clinging on for dear life to even a meager status quo lest you lose it is in itself dangerous bordering on catastrophic), this is a relationship where there isn't resentment, or guilt, or shame, or dread, or rage, or self-hate, or any of the other emotions that keep him paralyzed, unable to move this way or that. no debts, nothing owed of yourself and your soul's substance except what you can freely and safely and happily give. love and freedom don't coexist — but, I mean, you're almost starting to make me think........... unless...👀👀👀. the unconditional and undramatic 'you are here and I am here with you, you can be exactly how you are right now with me and it's safe for us both even though you're afraid it won't be, I'm not going anywhere' acceptance rook shows him here that he returns to them in the big romance scene, when it's rook who needs it. the way he's just. standing there in the center of it all, like a child desperately helplessly waiting to be found, hiding in the place he hopes you'll know to look first. (rook does know. it's one of the first things they say in there.)

in short the most important room in his little mind palace for the romance is the very first room — the one where rook isn't. where, in fact, rook cannot be, because they disprove the entire structure of the place with their existence and presence in his life. with everyone else he's putting words in their mouths about what they think of him, and rook is the one who actually gets to come in to speak their own words to him — and have him listen. ('he'll listen to you, he always listens to you', 'your voice is a comfort'.) of course rook isn't present anywhere else in there — at the risk of stating the obvious to a tedious degree, they aren't one of the locks, they're bringing the key. in the very finest 'the messenger and the message' sort of way.

[myrkulitescourge]

i'm surprised i haven't seen any text posts yet about the Unsubtle Differences between astarion’s tiefling party/high approval forest scene and the one you get after the goblin party.

there’s something so terribly interesting about how the conversation afterward plays out depending on which variation you pursue.

like, most people have seen the tiefling party version by now. astarion basking in the sunlight the morning after, playing off most of what tav says with relative ease, even when they ask about his scars and he tells them about cazador. his cadence is smooth and composed, his smile almost friendly, even though you know, as the viewer, he’s playing a game of manipulation at this point. the only real crack in his demeanor is if tav notices that cazador’s “poem” was written in infernal, which, understandably, startles him.

but recently i watched the goblin party version of this same scene, and everything reads so differently. unlike at the tiefling party, it’s still the middle of the night when astarion tries to leave, thinking tav is asleep—almost immediately after the act, in fact. when tav does speak to him, he’s visibly nervous, halting and stammering in the middle of lines delivered unflinchingly in the other version of the scene. he gestures broadly and fidgets more while talking, his smile comes and goes. there’s even some of his distinctive high pitched, fake laughter sprinkled throughout the exchange, almost identical to later scenes where he's very, very obviously uncomfortable (like if raphael mocks him and magics off astarion's shirt to show the party his scars in act 2, or when confronting the gur children in their cell in act 3, etc etc).

siding with the goblins represents something deeply familiar to astarion, a level of cruelty he's more than familiar with and embraces likely because cruelty and duplicity, to him, go hand-in-hand with the power and freedom he craves so badly—but he won't stay the night with this tav, even if he approves of their actions. no, in this case, he'll keep to what's familiar and attempt to leave them in the forest under the cover of the very same darkness he resents having been cast into by cazador. when he gets caught, it sets him on edge, and everything he says becomes such a blatant lie to save face that tav would have to be completely oblivious not to see through him, or maybe just not care enough to.

but if tav saves the refugees? challenges his worldview and comes out victorious? oh, he'll complain of the poor rewards for his trouble at the party and whine about it being boring, but he decides to stay with tav through the night while they're asleep and on past dawn. he takes a moment to enjoy the morning sunlight, returned to his life after two centuries without. the same is true if you have high enough approval that he asks before the party, in which case, you've almost certainly hit his biggest approval gains: trusting him and supporting his safety. maybe he doesn't trip over his words when he speaks because, well, maybe this is someone he doesn't have to worry about. someone who's already more than proven themselves a foolish, heroic sort with a bleeding heart or otherwise demonstrated that they're already in his corner. in other words, not a threat—at least not to him.

does any of this make sense. i wanna study this guy under a microscope.

[absolutely-not-my-main-blog]

Holes. Keys. What Have You.

I have full analyses I've been wanting to actually do and gather images for over the entire past year, but in the meantime, have this <3.

[meteortrails]

forever thinking about nami and luffy…. they just. their relationship is so perfectly, consistently, and beautifully written?? (read more bc I care WAY too much about them).

like it would be so easy to slot them into the typical dynamic of her being a buzzkill and him being a reckless dick but that’s not them at all. she’s the first person he meets out on the sea who really, deeply understands what freedom means to him, how vital and important it is - it’s why she’s the one he lets hold and fix his hat, it’s why he waits until she asks him to help with arlong, it’s why he never begrudges her any of her actions in arlong park. he knows her autonomy is just as important to her as his is to him, that she fucking Gets It. she has the same joy and whimsy and protective instinct in her heart, and like recognizes like!!! so luffy lets nami run the day to day of the ship, order him around, hold his greatest treasure in her hands, bc he trusts that when the chips come down she will never abuse that power. she’ll have his back and follow through on whatever insane orders he has his heart set on bc she knows the weight of what she’s been entrusted with.

and like, in return, nami gets exactly as much responsibility as she wants for the first time in her life! she doesn’t have to be alone, doesn’t have to protect everything that matters all on her own - she has luffy and the crew for that now. she gets to be part of a crew, a family, while still remaining in charge of her own life. and in response to all that trust and love, nami is just as protective of luffy and this new home as she ever was of cocoyashi. he gave her back her freedom and put his dream in her hands without a second thought, and she will keep it safe come hell or high fucking water. like I don’t know how to express how emphatically I feel about this but she won’t betray him even to save her own life, even when he would never fucking know!!! nami often ends up being luffy’s primary pillar of emotional support bc she’s just such a consistently steady, faithful presence at his back; even when they disagree on important shit her trust in his judgement and ability to get them through the storm is unshakeable, and vice versa.

idk man I just really do not know how to express how much it matters to me that nami is canonically a ruthless, conniving, deathly stubborn, control freak bitch and that’s like. lowkey WHY luffy+the crew love her so much. idk how to explain how batshit insane the symbolism of her being his navigator and him being her captain makes me.

[essektheylyss]

I am also thinking so much about the strange dynamic that Oscar and Cosmo have: Oscar churlish, pessimistic, hating himself, and Cosmo who remembers, even as old as he is, who probably remembers everything that Oscar's forgotten.

And Oscar's repeated statement of, "It should be the other way around. I should be the one taking care of you." It sounds at first, before you know, like frustration of a young man who feels like too much of a fuck up to take care of his elderly relative, even though Cosmo clearly has plenty of help. But once you flip it, it feels almost more incongruous—Oscar feeling like he's failed as a father, perhaps because he hasn't been able to act as an example for Cosmo, perhaps because of the amnesia, perhaps because Cosmo has seemingly dedicated his entire life to helping Oscar, even to his advanced age. But it doesn't seem like Cosmo is concerned about that.

As old as Cosmo is, as determined as it sounds like he is to fix Oscar's plight, it almost feels like he's lived this long out of spite and force of will. This is his purpose and his life's work, and it's not finished yet.

But if they succeed at ending this ritual or curse, what becomes of either of them? Cosmo, certainly, can rest then, and Oscar can in theory live out the rest of his life in peace, but at that point he's no longer forgetting anymore. He'll live out whatever remains with the belief that Cosmo's life was dedicated solely to this, and unlike Oscar, he won't even have the chance to have a life beyond it. I wonder if Oscar, knowing this, is so pessimistic by this point because no matter the outcome, he's already failed Cosmo on a fundamental, irretrievable level.

There's very little chance, even if Oscar doesn't live for long after this ends, that Oscar won't be the one burying Cosmo, rather than the other way around. A father isn't meant to outlive his children.

[ceoazula]

Obsessed with Vi being like, due to Jinx's actions I think she has to die. But I can't kill my little sister. Therefore Jinx is no longer my sister and really my sister died years ago. That's not how that works! But also how else is she supposed to cope i guess.

[arsenicflame]

steddyhands modern au inspired by this post:

(1828 words, themes of kink but nothing explicit, established blackhands & gentlebeard-centric. Happy Pride!)

Stede picks up leatherworking in the wake of his divorce. He's not exactly sure how it ended up being such an important hobby for him, only that he had always admired the intricate designs on his horse's best bridles, and with little else to do with his time, he decides to give it a go.

It's rocky going at first, but he's having fun working with his hands for the first time in his life, and there's a sense of satisfaction in seeing the design come to life as he works. With practice, his skills improve, and he learns how to make things that are truly one of a kind.

He starts off posting his pieces online, as a way to reach fellow enthusiasts, but quickly finds himself with a rather large audience. Stede’s style is unique, and, after many requests from his followers, Lucius encourages him to make some more basic pieces he can sell. It's not about making money for Stede, but another way to meet new people who share his interests- as Lucius keeps telling him, it's sad that his personal assistant is the main person he talks to these days. 

So Stede sets out on a new adventure, and has quite the time designing a new range of patterns for the market. He makes purses, belts, bracelets, and, most importantly, dog collars- all still with his unique designs embossed into them, of course. He rents a booth at his towns monthly craft fair, and very quickly finds himself with a new group of friends in the other regulars- Pete, his usual neighbour, who sells an array of wooden figures he carves, Roach, who runs a stand for his bakery, and Frenchie, who isn't actually a stallholder, but is almost always busking near his friend Wee John’s stand of knitted goods, bringing life to the market even in the pouring rain. There's also Buttons, another regular at the market. Nobody is exactly sure what he does there- he doesn't sell things, or seem to buy anything either, but rain or shine, he's there with the birds.

Stede’s been doing this a few months by the time June rolls around. As he's setting up his stand, he notices that the area is much busier than it’d normally be at this time of morning. Lucius, who got roped into helping run Stede’s stall somewhere down the line (despite his protests that this is not what personal assistant means… But hey, he got a boyfriend out of it, at least), reminds him that there's the parade today, too- not realising that Stede had no clue there was a parade today, and especially not that it was pride. Stede immediately jumps to fretting about the amount of stock he’s brought, and Lucius takes the cue to escape, saying he’ll go and grab them coffee (but really, he's off to flirt with Pete)

Lucius is still missing when Ed stumbles across the little leather stall. Stede’s just ran back to his car to fetch his last boxes of inventory, and by the time he returns, Ed’s already begun to narrow down his choices. Stede greets him, starting to tell him that they're not actually open yet, but before he gets more than a couple of words out, Ed’s exclaiming “You're a Kiwi!!!”

The two of them smile at the shared recognition, and Stede says he’ll make an exception, just for Ed, and asks him what exactly he was interested in. Ed tells him that he's looking for a collar “for his boy”, and points out the particular design he was looking at. It happens to be one of Stede’s favourites from this latest run of work, a fact he mentions to Ed. It leads them into a discussion about Stede’s craft, and Ed’s Izzy, and then everything in between. Ed’s listening intently to the things Stede’s telling him, completely drawn in by the process, and by Stede himself. He watches as Stede stamps Izzy's name into the collar, and Stede even lets him have a go at one of the stamps. 

Lucius reappears sometime in the middle of this- only to immediately retreat again, seeing Stede engrossed with Ed. He sets up camp at Pete's booth opposite, watching this man flirt intensely with his boss- and Stede flirt back just as hard. Does Stede even realise he’s doing it? Lucius had known Stede was gay since before Stede even admitted it to himself, but this is on a whole other level.

The pair stand there so long that Izzy comes to look for Ed- the two of them are manning a float on the parade with their crew, and it's past time for them to get geared up. He's already worked up, frustrated to have been left to set up everything alone, when Ed had just gone to see if he could get them both coffee. So maybe he's a bit of a prick, approaching with a brash “where the fuck have you been, Edward”, to which Stede brings the same energy, giving a bitchy “Ed! Do you know this guy?” Izzy tenses, ready to snap, but then Ed cuts in, excitedly telling Stede that this is “his Izzy!” Which confuses the hell out of Stede. 

Forgetting his earlier attitude, he asks Ed if he “really named his dog after his friend”, only to be met with confusion right back from Ed at where the hell Stede got the idea he had a dog from. Stede gestures at the bag with the collar in it, to which Ed has to tell him, “oh, no, that's for him.” Ed tells Stede that they're here to run a float for their local leather society, and while Stede is certainly shocked by what Ed’s saying, he's not finding himself… uninterested. It's simply that he’s never even considered any of this before, especially not that people would use the things that he made for this, but Ed sounds so enthusiastic about it all. He tells him about how his friends would love to see Stede’s work, about how classic leather gear is always so fucking boring- but not Stede’s stuff, no, Stede’s stuff is “fresh” and “fascinating” and unlike anything Ed’s ever seen before. 

Ed's enthusiasm is incredibly infectious, so when he invites Stede to come back to see their float, he readily agrees. It’s a concept Izzy’s less than enthusiastic about. He doesn’t really want to bring this man who’s dressed like he just walked out of a HOA board meeting to their kinky little corner of the world, but he is having a lot of fun watching Stede squirm, so decides not to raise a protest. He does demand he gets his long-overdue coffee first, though (Stede pays for it- as “compensation for him distracting Ed from his job”, he says, not giving Izzy a second to process before he's tapping his card)

By the time they return to the float, Fang, Ivan & Jim are waiting for them, all already geared up. Stede is stunned silent at the sight for about 5 seconds, before he starts actually looking at the quality of Jim’s harness, and proceeds to go off about the poor quality of the craftsmanship, about how the hardware is tacky and completely the wrong choice with this leather, how his “ten year old daughter could do a better job!!!” 

There's complete silence from the group, until Izzy, of all people, bursts into laughter at Stede’s audacity (and, the fact he was staring at Jim's tits completely unabashedly, like he hadn't even noticed them in the first place). Izzy's laughter sets Ed off as he tells the group about Stede’s misunderstanding- “you didn't say he was a person!” “I mean, he's my dog”- and soon everyone's having a friendly giggle at Stede’s mistake.

It's somewhere in the middle of the retelling that Ed remembers that this whole thing happened because he was buying Izzy a gift. After a moments fumbling, he presents Izzy with the collar-  It's a rich, deep black, embossed with a rolling pattern that resembles waves. It’s made from a firm enough leather to take the tooling, and to remind Izzy that he’s owned while he’s wearing it, yet still soft enough for long term comfort. Izzy's eyes immediately lock on to it, an unreadable expression coming over his face, and Ed turns it; first so he can really see the design and Izzy’s name embossed into it, and then so he can see the small “Ed ♥” on the inside of the collar, right over his swallow tattoo. 

“I did the heart,” Ed says to him softly, intended only for Izzy’s ears. Izzy's eyes flick up to Ed’s, and he raises his chin to give Ed the room to put it on. Ed buckles the collar around his neck almost reverently, a test of the tightness turning into a caress of Izzy's neck. It's a perfect fit.

It's as though something comes over Izzy; so twitchy and abrasive earlier, now silent, staring at Ed with a look akin to worship in his eyes. He obediently tilts his head for a kiss as Ed's fingers move to his chin- It's a sight to behold, and one that has Stede intrigued. He wants to know more about this lifestyle, and these men in particular. He wants to be the one to put that expression on Izzy's face.

The moment breaks as Ed and Izzy pull apart, and Ed calls for the crew to finish the last bits of set up. Izzy shakes himself a little before running off to bark orders again, but even still, there remains a softness to him that wasn't there before. 

Ed turns back to Stede with an apologetic smile, already obvious that he has to get going. Before he can speak, however, Stede jumps in -“My business numbers on the card in the box… I'll be around all day”- Ed’s smile turns more genuine at that, promising to stop by if he gets a moment, and that he’ll send his friend's Stede’s way- “if he wants that kind of business.” Stede says that he does, actually- that he's seen a whole new world already today, and, while he was a little taken aback at first, he can feel the passion Ed and his friends have for this life. If there's one thing that's ever mattered to Stede, it's other people's enthusiasm. Maybe he doesn't completely understand yet, but he would like to try.

One year later, Stede’s back at the market on pride weekend again, far better stocked for the crowds this time around. Lucius is finally free to spend the day flirting with Fang & Pete to his heart's content, now that Stede’s roped his own boyfriends into helping him run the stall- and into modelling the merchandise. Ed loves that part, while Izzy needs a lot more convincing, but the puppy eyes Stede & Ed weaponise against him make a very good argument.

[a-personiftranslator]

ok i just spent my entire day watching All of the solarballs episodes so here are my immediate thoughts

astronomically accurate planetspirit whump my FUCKING HEART i don’t even know what to say. i spend the least amount of time on average on planetspirit stuff because except for earth they don’t actually fall under my definition of personifs but ive spent far more time proportionally crying over them than any other kind of -spirit

i find it really interesting that the core message of the series so far seems to be the nature of redemption and responsibility (europa, ganymede, titan, earth, jupiter, saturn, x, probably more i’m forgetting) considering that unlike personifs celestial bodies in actuality still have no agency, but it makes sense because like. everybody’s gravity affects everybody else’s, and so there’s no way to look at anyone individually and decide anything without considering the destabilization it’ll cause. despite everything there’s no choice but to tolerate everybody

i love the… fragility of life-bearing planets. it’s fine for everybody else to take a few asteroid hits and go on extended trips out of orbit but earth can’t be left alone because his axis’ll freak out, he freezes up even before he leaves the goldilocks zone, he NEEDS luna to take his hits for him, etc. and i wonder if this ever frustrates him. the main issue with x taking jupiter’s place was the risk to him. ik this was already explored somewhat during the moon revolution but still

ganymede vs planet x sounds so incredibly random without hours of context lmfao it’s like that one wttt poll asking whether god or alaska would be more likely to fall for an mlm

i’m noticing common memetics among planet fandoms (i am aware currently of solarballs, the earth-chan thing, planethumans, and the milky way/jupitearth fandom) the way country fandoms tend to fixate on certain events (ww2 and specifically poland’s experience, depicted accurately or not). jupiter is always characterized as a calm, protective figure, and earth is always somewhat egotistical, has a complicated relationship with mars, and is unconditionally devoted to their life forms, which is not really considered a strength. everybody else’s depiction is more variable, i’ve never seen the sun be portrayed as so unstable

i think the unpredictability of my interests is one of the reasons i don’t get as much engagement as i’d like lmfao

[fanfictionroxs]

I love grindledore, but Dumbledore siblings, however broken, were Always the true love.

Aberforth being his brother's keeper and the voice of reason that brings Albus back to reality, who sticks by his older brother in war after war (after all they do have the same morals.. almost). Ariana's ghost haunting them forever because their trio is forever incomplete without her. Albus finding his true desire to ultimately be them, his family.. remembering them, never forgetting or forgiving himself for the horrific things that happened almost a century ago because his siblings' pain is his own.. Gellert is his love, but what is 2 months of understanding to a lifetime of hateful begrudging love, love that never lets go come heaven or hell, love that is so understandably angry yet absolute, unwavering.. what is 2 months of Gellert's conditional love in front of a 100 years of unconditional love that his little brother gives him? And Albus doesnt know who really teaches him the true meaning of love or makes him fall in love with the idea of love, is it Gellert or Abe.. maybe it's both.. or perhaps it is simply in a dumbledore's nature to be enamoured with love and give it as much as possible like Abe does to Albus and Ariana. And it's almost a hundred years without Ariana yet Aberforth and Albus never forget to love her with every breath they take and she doesn't. And the three Dumbledores are doomed tragic siblings, but they are each other's true love until the end.

[kismetconstellations]

@sockdooe I first encountered this supposed explanation in the comments section of a fanfiction, so it is to be taken with a grain of salt, but I read that Shiro's design was primarily based on what the showrunners thought "looked cool". This includes the prosthetic grafted onto his person by his captors, the scar across his face, and the shock of white fringe in his otherwise naturally dark hair. And, I won't lie, his design serves its purpose. Shiro immediately draws the eye, and not just because of his usual placement front and center in the standard team line up.

It's reasonable for the sort of space soldier, G.I. Joe type of character the staff intended Shiro to be to have these sorts of physical characteristics.

It's also completely reasonable in a Sci-Fi/Action show for a villain as menacing and ruthless as Sendak to have a similarly distinct, eye-catching design. Such features as a sinister, gleaming, red bionic eye, and massive prosthetic arm powered by a core of glowing, magical electric energy pulsing in a line from shoulder to forearm stand out, are easily memorable, and make him instantly recognizable as a really Bad Guy.

The idea of Shiro being a sort of "light, heroic mirror" to Sendak, which the show introduced and continued to attempt to enforce all the way up to Sendak's death, sits incredibly uneasily with me, however. As I've made explicit several times, before.

Content Warning for discussion of sexual assault/rape.

We're shown the recurrent imagery of Sendak looming over and behind an incapacitated Shiro.

Shiro's instinctive response to seeing Sendak heading toward him is to back away out of fear before steeling himself and resolving to fight, if only to protect the Castle and an unconscious Lance.

The very first thing that Shiro says to Sendak is, "You're not getting in", to which Sendak replies, "Yes. I am".

Coran suggests that the Galra might keep him and Hunk as, "some sort of creepy pet to play with how they please", in an appeal to Shay and Rax for assistance concealing their presence on the Balmera.

There's genuine contempt in Shiro's voice when he asks Sendak, "What do you want?", prior to his torture at Sendak's hands.

Sendak delivers a stomach-churning gloating little speech after torturing Shiro via electric shock.

And, Rolo refers to Sendak as a, "real nasty bugger", a term that has an exceptionally crude colloquial meaning.

Now, maybe I'm a cynical weirdo who is reading far too deeply into this, and connecting dots that aren't there. But...

Shiro bears a much stronger resemblance to Berserk's Guts than the Takashi Shirogane from the original Go Lion! that he's named after. Guts is a famous survivor of childhood sexual abuse, having been sold by his adoptive father and purchased for use as a sex slave by an ugly hulking pederast.

There were obvious Neon Genesis Evangelion fans working on this show, and Rei Ayanami, the character that Shiro's story seems to reference with the sheer excess of clones created using his DNA, is also a victim of sexual abuse.

(There's even, arguably, influence taken from The Legend of the Blue Wolves, a relatively obscure yaoi OVA largely set at a military facility which trains soldiers and pilots for combat missions in deep space. It features an extended scene with a virtual flight simulator, and one of the two male leads is-- wouldn't you know it? Raped by an ugly hulking monster.)

Correlation does not imply causation, and perhaps the similarities are entirely superficial, and we're not meant to think too hard about them.

Yet, with the amount of scrutiny that a series as utterly wholesome and innocuous as Bluey is constantly under, I cannot buy for a minute that a series Netflix gave a TV Y7 rating to didn't undergo some level of screening to ensure that its content was appropriate for the intended child audience. Someone had to have asked the staff if bugger was the term they meant to use, aware of the disturbing, far less than child-friendly implications, and was met with a resounding confirmation.

Beyond that, extended proximity to even an imprisoned and inanimate Sendak sends Shiro spiraling into a psychological break down.

Shiro's intensely traumatic experiences in captivity, which his brain seems to have largely repressed in order to protect him ("It's all a blur.") would, by themselves, be enough to convince him that he's been broken and reshaped into something monstrous. His bodily autonomy was, unquestionably, brutally violated, and his innately altruistic, self-sacrificing nature was violently challenged when he was forced to kill or be killed for his captors' entertainment. His right arm was taken from him and replaced with a weapon, and he has the blood of who knows just how many innocents on his hands. He was, indeed, broken down in an attempt to reform him into the Galra Empire's "greatest weapon", and likely very much wars with himself over what he had to do to ensure his own survival, believing himself to be a monster.

What really stands out to me, though, is that this intense, primal terror and the accompanying feelings of "brokenness" and "monstrousness" only surface around Sendak. Despite also being associated with and direct causes of his trauma, neither Haggar nor Zarkon rattle Shiro to his core the way Sendak does.

Neither of them are insistent on drilling into Shiro's head how "broken" he supposedly is, as Sendak is shown doing over and over again. Including taunting Shiro over the non-consensual modifications to his body.

Harboring a deep sense of shame, and viewing themselves as something dirty, ugly, disgusting, broken, or even monstrous is an experience common among survivors of sexual abuse.

Having Shiro's physical condition repeatedly mirror his personal tormentor's would be sick and twisted enough.

Adding the context of rape or sexual abuse to Shiro's torment makes the creative decision to intentionally model his arm after his abuser's outright sadistic.

No one deserves to have a constant physical reminder of their abuser and rapist permanently attached to their person. And, attempting to paint Shiro as a "heroic mirror" to Sendak fails entirely when Shiro doesn't so much as get to best Sendak in combat once.

All of the points you've raised about the function and structure of prosthetics are amazing, informative, and highly appreciated. (The comment about Shiro's abominable floating arm looking like it wouldn't be able to support the weight of a grocery bag makes me laugh.) Sadly, there's a faction of the fanbase who are all too quick to fetishize that arm, like everything else surface-level about Shiro. I've seen a number of fics where its ability to be propelled a great distance with a single thought is used to pleasure a partner while Shiro, himself, is in a different room, where the arm is equipped with a vibrating function for use as a sex toy, and, of course, where the thickness of its fingers is sexualized for... the same reason the bulge in the crotch of Shiro's pants is.

(I beg this fandom to stop reducing this man to a seme stereotype because of his physical build and height. Nothing in his personality suggests that he would be anything even approximating that cursed archetype. Let him be a pillow princess, for God's sake, like he deserves.)

This reply took me forever, and I am sincerely sorry about that. I hope you find something worthwhile in this haphazard collection of thoughts.

And, "Sendick" is how I'm going to be mentally referring to that creep from now on.

[sponfawn]

Ok, look. Looklooklooklooklook.

Im feeling dense af and you wanna know why? I have read mth at LEAST 10 times start to finish. And I never noticed the parallel between the scene where Brick rejects Blossom and his dream about Blossom until today???

Like???

??????????

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Like obviously I knew the dream is his subconscious desire taking over to the point where he doesn't realize it's a dream, and desperately wanting to be with her but in a passive way. But it's not just his desire for her and his general regret, it's also his desperate wish for a do-over of that specific first conversation. Where instead of having a "talk" with him saying he can't be with her, she makes the choice for him and he gets to surrender to it. I'm not really sure how to word it but the fact that he finished dream!Blossom's sentence with "To talk" really seals it for me. Like there could've been other ways to end that sentence, but he chose those specific words, kind of steering the dream back to that conversation in a choose your own adventure kinda way? And they are the only words he says in the entire dream that actually align with his thoughts - the only honest ones (the only other line he says out loud is in direct contrast with his thoughts). At the party, Brick says he wanted to talk to Blossom but doesn't know what he would even say to her. Our "mature" dumbass just really wants "to talk" and get an alternate ending where they close the distance. But he has no idea how to get that through his own volition and agency.

I have no doubt that a bunch of other ppl saw this years ago, but it's making me emotional and I had to get it out

(edited a bit for clarity)

[jilted-love]

The first time Yusuke verbally recognized another boy to be good looking, that was Shishiwakamaru who was an enemy back then and someone who was arrogant and picking a fight with Team Urameshi. Instead of complimenting his looks, Yusuke used it as an insult instead. He was a teenager and seeing someone attractive be an asshole towards him and his friends made him want to insult that attractiveness fast and sure to stop it.

Fast forward to current events, Yusuke joined his friends and allies in training at Genkai's temple before the next Makai Tournament.

Once, Yusuke halted them all in the middle of training because he said loud enough for everyone to hear, "Shishiwaka is actually really pretty" while they were all sparring and Yusuke was watching them beside Kurama. "But not as pretty as Kurama. Kurama is beautiful in either of his forms."

Shishiwakamaru felt flustered and reacted aggressively before running off away from Yusuke. He was used to compliments from girls. He had an entire fan club back in the Dark Tournament. But he was not used to getting compliments from boys and especially not Yusuke Urameshi. All of his friends who fought Team Urameshi before have unquestionable loyalty to Yusuke but Shishiwakamaru never fought him. He didn't understand everyone's devotion to the boy but one compliment turned him speechless and he didn't know how else to take it so he ran away.

Since then, compliments from Yusuke became frequent. Kurama's hair was beautiful and smooth whether red or silver; Hiei, who visited them once, was called cute and he got a punch in Yusuke for that but Yusuke laughed and said it was worth it to see him blush; Chu's muscles were firm no matter how much he drank (Yusuke emphasized this by pressing fingers on his abs and Chu was more than happy to flex); Jin's eyes were bright and his smile was gorgeous and his ears kept twitching the entire day from those words out of Yusuke's mouth; Kuwabara, who will be joining the next Tournament too, was noticed for his broad and strong chest that Yusuke cupped in order to measure them, something he told Kuwabara was part of training when Kuwabara was embarrassed and tried to protest.

When Keiko and Botan came to visit, things went south but only for Yusuke.

"He's been groping all of you and you just let him???" Keiko was fuming when she knew. "Oh, that pervert! You spoil him too much!"

"He said it's part of training!" Kuwabara tried to explain while Botan shook her head beside Keiko. "So he measures my pectorals and touches Chu's stomach. He also touched Jin's ears and brushes Kurama's hair. Is that really groping?"

"He also tried to touch Hiei's cute butt," Kurama added, remembering when Yusuke got punched by the smaller demon but he looked too pleased to be bothered by it while touching the tips of his smooth beautiful red hair.

"I get it," Botan said, staring at Kurama. "You let Yusuke get away with all of these because you foxes are vain! You just like him praising you, don't you, Kurama?"

"You knew all along?" Kuwabara gasped.

"Well..." Kurama fiddled with his healthy well taken care of hair even more. If he was in his silver form, his fox tail would be wagging excitedly behind him. "It's true, if I didn't want him touching and praising my hair he could be with Karasu by now."

And everyone shuddered.

"I guess if it's fine for you, then nothing's wrong about it," Keiko shrugged. She couldn't fault them. It did feel good to have Yusuke's attention and praise when it didn't embarrass her.

"It's not okay for me!" Kuwabara exclaimed, his face as red as a baboon's ass. "That jerk! He actually made me think that was training. I'm kicking his ass!"

And then Kuwabara stormed off to look for Yusuke somewhere in the temple. Later after they were done with the punching and the kicking, he told Yusuke he was welcome to touch if he was honest about it while blushing from his scalp down to his chest. In the following training sessions, Yusuke was still complimenting them but he was more honest in his touches. Honesty, though, was still getting him a punch from Hiei but everyone assumed they liked the physical contact too much to stop them.

[miametropolis]

My condolences for the containment breach I get how having thousands of ppl say the same joke over and over in the notes of your genuine analysis post can get annoying 😭 😭😭😭 I’m extremely down to hear more about the differences between the ninth and tenth doctors if you have any other insights you want to share though!!! I’ve been turning your post over and over in my brain like a rotisserie chicken ever since I read it it’s so good

omg thank you for your condolences...it really is the containment breach of all time...let me think!! I have a MAJOR tenth doctor video essay I may or may not make so here are the cliff notes:

-To begin. Anne Carson wrote that to live beyond the end of your myth is a perilous thing.

-in many ways, the 10th Doctor is cursed from his inception b/c he is born at the end of the Doctor and Rose's romantic arc (from a certain point of view) AND YET he is born sheerly out of love for her / to love her

-(we all know the fanon--or is it canon?--idea that Ten's face was subconciously selected to be one that Rose would like, and he's gone for her from the beginning...hello, The Christmas Invasion.)

-all that said, by the time The Parting of the Ways occurs, Rose and Nine have completed a full narrative arc:

-Nine whisked Rose away from the life of boredom and sheltered drudgery she experienced on the estate; she brought life back into the eyes of a hardened war veteran/The Last of the Time Lords

-more importantly, they complete a kind of mutualistic ultimate sacrifice (in a Shakesperian sense?) wherein Rose 'becomes' the Doctor by absorbing the literal heart of the TARDIS (we don't have time to get into that) and erasing the Daleks into dust, finishing the last of the Time War AND saving the Doctor's life

-he immediately returns the favor, absorbing the energy that's destroying her with a kiss (let it be known--the ONLY kiss between the Doctor and Rose Tyler proper--neither Tentoo or Cassandra really count imo), returning her to humanity, life, and safety

-all that said, Nine dies both saving AND being saved by Rose in a kind of unrivaled (?) parity between Doctor and companion. it's perfect synthesis.

-THEN 10 is born. uh-oh.

It is here that I would like to quote Michael Kinnucan's fabulous essay 'The Gods Show Up' on Greek tragedies:

The tragic hero is complete. You can call him unhappy (miserable, utterly broken) even before he is dead. For an instant he is something like divine. And then he dies, because there’s nothing left to do. The center of every tragedy is the image of a human being who has already died but keeps talking, someone whose face is a mask.

I think one of the most fascinating 10 v. 9 moments is that one scene that got cut where Rose says "I miss him." and the Doctor replies "Me too."

As many people in the notes of that original post point out (god help me) 10 is ALSO born IMMEDIATELY into heartbreak--whatever vestigal version of Nine lives inside him died with the despair of losing Rose

-TEN is the man that went sauntering away. perhaps that's part of why Ten is so terrified of/resentful towards regeneration. I think he's lived precisely the worst cost of it.

-The notion of 'talking after death' and 'wearing a face that's a mask' is a existentialist take on regeneration itself--ten EPITOMIZES this tragic hero archetype, esp. after Doomsday (literally! Doomsday!!)

-during his life, I wonder if Nine already considers himself lost in a sense? He's lived past the Time War, past the destruction of everything, and he's also the first NuWho Doctor. HIS ability to indulge in love (even in mortality, given his short lifespan) is different.

-TEN on the other hand has that INCREDIBLY frightening (for him) confrontation with Sarah Jane in School Reunion--knitting him back into canon continuum of Doctor Who, stitching him to the myth of The Doctor that has to live on and on and on in perpetuity--and seems VERY haunted by (im)mortality

-How much time does Ten spend running from Jack? A human being who CAN follow him to the end of time? Ten can't decide if he wants to be mortal or immortal, human or Time Lord. Think of the way he acts with Martha, with Wilf, with Donna. He is totally frozen inside of the space of his seasons. He has time paralysis (fatal, for a Time Lord)

-he is the first doctor that we see reallllly try to stave off regeneration

-That's why there's a certain frantic escapism to his adventures with Rose in S2--he knows, more than she does, that they are hurtling toward's disaster.

-he can't love Rose in a consumate way, even if he wanted to (he wants to) b/c he's trapped inside of his myth. he's like sisyphus. or that guy getting his liver ripped out by the eagle. Nine and Rose are lines that can cross. Ten and Rose are parallel lines. if they touch, the universe dissolves. hence why the narrative/God/Russel T. Davies had to lock her away in another universe

anways!

Ten once canonically carved a statue of Rose by hand with every inch of her body absolutely perfect, from memory, and I think that's crazy

[nanomooselet]

Episode Seven: Wolfwood

It's a lovely evening in No Man's Land, and you are a horrible cultist.

The more I think about the idea that Legato wasn't ordered to do this, the more sense it makes to me. Let's do a count of assets this craziness puts into peril. We have the Punisher, highly chemically compatible and on an assignment already, who really doesn't need to be under more stress. We have the Doublefang, who's even better than the Punisher since he heals without the drugs, and through him Wolfwood learns that the Eye of Michael can't be trusted to keep its word.

We have the Plant aboard the steamer, as Zazie points out, and I'm not sure Legato is as concerned about it as he claims to be. We have the steamer itself, a relic of the spacefaring age with plenty of still-functional technology on board even if the humans can't do much with it. (And isn't that interesting? They seem to have just stuck a steam engine in there and closed off the rest. Cool worldbuilding details.) It travels to and from July - I suspect it carries at least some cargo and personnel for the cult. Speaking of, we have Hopeland Orphanage and its stock of potential subjects, which we know for a fact the Eye has its stamp on.

Finally we have Vash, who's one of the cult's figures of worship. He's the only living thing that Legato's "beautiful angel" truly cares about. Even if Legato's plan is a success, is achieving Wolfwood's perfect loyalty worth losing any one of the rest, let alone Vash? I really have to wonder how Legato planned to explain any of this.

Of course, he does explain, doesn't he? You must give up on your little brother and face reality. I must take everything you love from you so that you can fulfil your noble purpose as a weapon. What we're seeing is Legato's first demonstration of his character to come, building sadistic traps to force painful choices upon his target, but also a glimpse of what awaits Vash at the end of his journey. Where could Legato have learned his definition of love? And let's not forget that he refers to his feelings as love in the first place.

He's such a drama queen. Can't wait to see him ruining everything next season.

So much in this two-parter is amazing, but I think a somewhat underrated moment is Vash preventing Wolfwood from killing Livio with that insane trick shot. My boy frees Wolfwood from a horrific mental trap because no one should have to choose between the things that they love, the things that keep them alive. Best of boys. Precious darling. He wants so, so badly for there to be a way out for him.

I'm hesitant to discuss Livio that much, because we, uh, really don't learn that much about him? We see the sad little boy in Nick's memories - which I have reason to suspect are not entirely the objective truth - and we have the stumbling puppet who boards the steamer. He isn't in a position to make his thoughts known, except once, and, well… it’s a decisive demonstration. But one that precludes any further participation. I have read the manga, yes, and I know what he's like there, but my feeling is that's more what he'll become than what he is now. There seems to be one fairly significant change, however: Razlo, and Livio's attitude toward him.

Razlo's there. I'm sure he's there. But is he always there in the same way? Is Livio so out of it because he's under the mask's control, or is it Razlo the mask keeps supressed? And when it becomes damaged, why does what Livio see in the mirror so horrify him? Does Livio even know who else is in his mind?

(We get our first glimpse of Chapel, too.)

(Somehow I feel like I'm not going to be a fan of this guy.)

They didn't save Livio, but he got to make a choice. Even if it was a choice they wish he hadn't made.

Speaking of choices!

Meryl and Roberto continue to be the show's main source of comedy - the dub work for the Bad Lads Gang is so funny. Poor Meryl's teary little face when they bring up the Worms. Them being all excited about getting on the cover of an outlaw magazine, whatever that is. Roberto just being all welp, this might as well happen when he learns the faltering steamer has a space age cannon stuck to the top and that still works.

Not enough booze in the world.

And then Meryl makes a choice. Roberto's right, on some level - they're not soldiers. They're not fighters. By any sane standard this is not their fucking job. But there is no one else who can do it. Regardless of ability, there's simply no one else who's been given the choice between standing there, taking the risk, or fleeing with the knowledge you could have done something and didn't. So Meryl makes her stand... and I realised that Roberto does too, because he faces the same choice. They all do! There's something they all want to protect more than anything else. Such different people with such vastly different skills and life experiences all have something in common, and they work together to realise their purpose. It's the second time in the series this has happened and disaster's been averted with their efforts. I just!

Of course then things get even crazier and we move into what might be among my favourite action sequences in the entire series? It's admittedly hard to narrow it down. This has been extensively dissected elsewhere, but it really might have the most beautiful cinematography (especially in the Plant room - ethereal, and then the hard cut comparison to the steel and scorching flesh of Wolfwood's efforts and I'm reduced to helpless arm-waving). But I think there's one detail I want to emphasise?

Cool watery blue and burning fiery orange-red, yes. Gorgeous contrast. But both also have just a dash of the opposing colours. The two aren't so far apart, each holding part of the other - fundamentally connected, in spite of all the ways they're different.