#this surface level introspection is too much

[saturnbellfromhell]

RANDOM ASTRO OBSERVATIONS

Welcome back! I hope you relished my roasting series as much as I did. I can’t wait to create another one and laugh all over again. But for now, we’re returning to the heart of my account—my favorite kind of post. I love observing the people around me and capturing the psychological traits they all seem to share. I'm excited to see all of your feedback and hope you enjoy reading this post as much as I loved creating it! So let's begin, shall we...

▫️CAPRICORN SUN

I believe the perfect match for a Capricorn is an incredible Scorpio. Both signs carry a certain darkness and mystery, each in their own unique way. They share a sharp edge, a love for a little cynicism, and a reputation for being pessimistic—when in reality, they’re just deeply realistic. They both understand the isolating feeling of being surrounded by people yet still feeling alone. They’re keenly aware of how time can crawl and race all at once. More than anything, they need a partner who will stand by them unwaveringly—someone who would go to the ends of the earth for them.

They have a deep love for all animals, but while they may get along well with dogs, I believe Capricorns are naturally more drawn to cats. They appreciate the quiet companionship of a solitary, independent creature rather than one that is constantly energetic and demanding. A cat’s reserved yet loyal nature aligns perfectly with a Capricorn’s own sense of self.

Capricorns may sometimes be seen as boring—after all, they prioritize stability and practicality—but beneath that exterior lies a wise, spiritual, and introspective soul. They crave meaningful connections, thoughtful conversations, and depth that go beyond surface-level interactions. Shallow exchanges bore them; they seek substance, authenticity, and a bond that truly resonates.

▫️AQUARIUS SUN

Another Saturn-ruled sign, but this time with a more high-spirited and free-spirited nature than our dear Capricorn. What I find so amusing is that every Aquarius I know seems almost indifferent to their own birthday—not in a sad or melancholic way, but with a casual, “Oh, thanks, I guess” kind of attitude. It’s as if they view celebrations of themselves as unnecessary, yet they’ll happily go all out for others.

Aquarius and Capricorn have an undeniable pull toward each other. Capricorns admire Aquarius’s visionary mind, while Aquarius respects Capricorn’s quiet strength and determination. Though they approach life differently, they both share a deep sense of independence and an appreciation for intellect, making their bond very close.

▫️MOON IN 12th HOUSE

There’s so much to unpack in this observation. Highly psychic, intuitive, and almost otherworldly, they navigate the unseen realm as if it were their personal gateway to deeper self-awareness. They don’t just sense energy—they absorb it, making them incredibly empathetic yet easily drained by those who feel too "normal" or disconnected from the deeper layers of existence. Their intuition is sharp; they can read a room and spot a bad vibe from miles away. It’s less of a skill and more of a knowing.

Life for them rarely feels steady—there’s always another transformation, another shift, making a "normal" week or year feel almost impossible.

With the Moon in the 12th house, isolation isn’t just a preference—it becomes a necessary refuge, a way to process the overwhelming energies they absorb. It’s not just about wanting to be alone; it’s about needing to retreat to protect their own spirit. However, their biggest lesson is learning when to disconnect—stepping away before they become completely drained. If they fall into the trap of constant people-pleasing, they risk deeper isolation and, eventually, emotional exhaustion. To truly thrive, they must prioritize their own energy just as much as they do for others.

They are the empaths of society, the caregivers, the spiritual teachers, the mothers, the fathers, and much more. They are all of the above wrapped up. They have lived and outlived many lives before choosing this one. Always on a journey to complete an invisible mission.

▫️CANCER MOON

Often looked down upon for their love of solitude, these individuals are actually some of the most comforting souls to exist. They don’t ask for much—just a cozy room, dim lighting, and a lover by their side. You can already picture the kind of person they are: someone who finds joy in life’s simplest pleasures. They appreciate good food, tend to be naturally sleepy, and have a soft spot for people who are often misunderstood by others.

They’re always eager to help when needed, but when overstimulated, their mood shifts quickly—becoming grumpy, distant, or even off-putting. And when deeply hurt, they may resort to manipulation or cunning behavior. Angels become devils quickly if not attended to correctly.

▫️NEPTUNE IN THE 11th HOUSE

Neptune, the planet that embodies Piscean energy, isn’t concerned with reality. Instead, it drifts into dreams and the abyss. In your birth chart, Neptune reveals the areas where clarity can become clouded over time, where rose-colored glasses are often worn, distorting one’s perception. When Neptune resides in the 11th house, the realm of groups and friendships, it can make it difficult to see situations clearly, especially when it comes to choosing friends.

Those with this placement often find themselves losing friends, trusting too easily, or losing their sense of self in their relationships. They tend to see the best in others, which can lead to heartbreak when they realize too late that their trust was misplaced. What’s right in front of them can go unnoticed, and by the time the truth reveals itself, it’s often already too late. Keep a steady eye when having this placemnet. Sometimes, your biggest enemy is sitting right next to you.

▫️LIBRA SUN

Libras can be seen as the “popular girl” who effortlessly draws attention without needing to try too hard, unlike a Leo who thrives on being the center of the spotlight. They naturally shine, but they don’t need to vocalize or flaunt it—there's a quiet confidence to them. Their need to always appear at their best can sometimes come off as superficial or a bit fake, creating a sense of distance. However, what many overlook about Libra is the deeper, darker energy they carry beneath the surface—something that often remains hidden.

What you see with a Libra is typically what you get—99% of the time. They rarely let anyone see the depths of who they truly are. While their gorgeous exterior and enthusiastic demeanor attract many, most people don’t stick around long enough to see past the façade. Though they draw the interest of signs like Scorpio, Cancer, and Capricorn, these connections often fall short of the emotional depth and loyalty they seek.

Capricorns, for instance, are always a bit wary and never fully trust a Libra. There’s something about them that just doesn’t sit right, though they can’t quite pinpoint it. Cancers, on the other hand, may feel neglected and unappreciated, often leaving when they sense their efforts to care for Libra aren’t reciprocated. Scorpios, despite their initial attraction, get frustrated with Libra’s seemingly indifferent attitude—an attitude that, deep down, they know is a mask for vulnerability and insecurity. Though all three signs can sense the hidden layers, they often end up walking away when they realize they’re not getting the emotional connection they hoped for.

▫️MOON IN THE 8th HOUSE

Moon in the 8th house holds immense power, one that can be both a gift and a challenge. People with this placement have the potential to undergo profound transformations, constantly evolving and reshaping themselves. However, these transformations are rarely easy. They often come through deep emotional upheaval, and navigating these intense shifts can be draining and difficult.

The 8th house Moon individuals are deeply connected to the unseen and unconscious realms, making them highly sensitive to emotions, often to the point of becoming overwhelmed. If they don't learn to channel their emotional depth constructively, they can become disconnected from their true selves and find it hard to navigate their inner world.

Because they feel so much and often don’t have the tools or outlets to process these intense emotions, they can fall into coping mechanisms like substance abuse as a way to numb the emotional overload. This is especially true if the individual’s emotional needs are neglected, and the heavy energy of transformation becomes too much to bear. Without support, people with this placement can become trapped in their own emotional cycles.

However, when these individuals do unlock the potential of their Moon in the 8th house, they have an incredible ability to heal themselves and others. Their emotional depth can lead to profound self-awareness, transformation, and even a powerful ability to guide others through their own emotional challenges. The key is self-acceptance and learning how to process those intense emotions in healthy ways, avoiding the temptation to numb them.

As always, thank you for being here. Sending lots of love!

xoxo NK❤️

[rawliverandgoronspice]

While I completely agree with everything Bloo said, I am... I also feel like there is a competing possibility for the placement of Ganondorf's glyph, and while it absolutely does not erase the implications or the fact that it does punch down this story of repetence and villification and "dark origin story", as the devteam would consider it (I think it might have been part of the argument within the team), I also think there's a more... down-to-earth, designer-brain case at play here. I might be totally offbase, but for having interacted with a LOT of designers who think practically about things and are both uninterested and very perplexed by the necessity of storytelling and its priorities, I think the placement choice may have gone something like this:

"Hey, wouldn't it be normal to put a Ganondorf memory near Gerudo Town, since he's gerudo? It would just make sense that players would go look for memories related to Ganondorf near Gerudo Town, right? And then it's important to have the glyph be visible from all nearby landmarks to encourage the player to go from interest point to interest point."

I think it was literally all the designers considered in their choice of placement honesty. Why wouldn't they. They apparently didn't hire narrative designers/game writers/quest designers/anyone with narrative sensitivity to keep the design team from going with their first obvious game designer instinct over and over and over, never once stopping to think about the ingame or "watsonian" implications of any of it --instead their choices are almost systematically guided by progression, affordance, impact, and "wouldn't it be cool if". I think this particular instance is a great example of that "designer brain" tendency --but the whole game is like that, which is why I'm so grumpy that they thought narrative skill was but an optional flavoring they could skip with no consequences. I don't think anyone in this team considered the way the glyphs would or even *could* impact the NPCs in the world beyond vaguely Impa and the NPCs that serve as pointers going "activity over there!!" as their core function.

It's exactly as Bloo said: these barely qualify as Zelda's memories. The entire framing is poorly thought out, and I think game mechanics is truly the only thing driving most of the decisions taken in this game.

do you ever warp into Gerudo Town, look straight ahead, and draw some unpleasant conclusions about the connection between that geoglyph and the Gerudo tendency to bear guilt for Ganondorf’s actions even thousands of years into the future? Like, assuming that for some time the geoglyphs were visible before disappearing until the Upheaval, that sure is a “look at this guy you made who sucked so bad and will one day be a threat once more” reminder staring the Gerudo dead in the face. and that seems a bit much

[whizzing-fizzbee]

Black Butterflies & Deja Vu

Sebastian Sallow x Reader (F!MC) Rating: Explicit 18+, MDNI (smut, profanity), all characters are 18+ Words: 5,474 Themes: friends to lovers, angst, fluff, shameless smut

Summary: Your best friend Sebastian Sallow has been downright angsty lately. You have no idea it's because he's lovesick over you, until Anne and Ominis force your hands.

Notes: Thank you to the lovely anon who requested some Sebastian Sallow angst and smut. Decided to write this one inspired by the song "Black Butterflies & Deja Vu" by The Maine. All characters are 18-year-old seventh years. Reader/MC is a Ravenclaw.

Read on AO3 or below the cut.

Sebastian Sallow sighed and hurled another stone into the Black Lake. It pierced the water’s surface with a sharp splash and sank to its deep demise. Sebastian wished he could do the same.

Perhaps that was a bit dramatic, but Sebastian was feeling rather melancholy. Another Saturday spent alone while you were whisked off to Hogsmeade by yet another suitor.

Or so he thought.

In truth, you were only with Amit Thakkar to help your fellow Ravenclaw craft a plan to ask out Poppy Sweeting. You were fond of Amit – he was handsome and thoughtful – but the notion of any romantic interest between the two of you was laughable. You were gutsy; the type to charge into combat and to speak your mind. Amit was introspective; more of the type to read up on his enemies rather than fight them.

Besides, Amit had it bad for your friend, Poppy. He told you her kindness toward creatures was endearing to him, but he also appreciated how she fought for her convictions. Ever since you and Poppy took down the poachers of Horntail Hall, Amit admired her creed.

Now, it was your seventh year and Amit felt like he was running out of time. You assured him that Poppy would likely say yes to a date. She often spoke highly of Amit, noting his kind and studious nature. Sure, Amit wasn’t the most adventurous student, but you’d seen him hold his own in combat the time you took him to a goblin mine. He had more moxie than he let on.

So when Amit asked you for help, you eagerly agreed. Now that you no longer had to worry about goblin rebellions or Anne Sallow’s curse, you had time for more fun and frivolous quests – like playing matchmaker for two friends.

You spent the afternoon in the Three Broomsticks with Amit to help him decide how and when to ask Poppy on a date. Once it was decided that you’d let him use your vivarium so that he and Poppy could spend time with your unicorns, you toasted to your plan with a round of butterbeers before returning to the castle.

You were practically skipping with satisfaction. Your plan was bound to work and you couldn’t wait to see what may come of Poppy and Amit’s romance.

But Sebastian didn’t know that. To him, Amit was just another sorry bloke who had joined the long line of people desperate to know you on a deeper level. But no one knew you the way Sebastian did. It was more than your secrets, though; sure, he knew those – about Ranrok, your ancient magic and the Keepers – but he also knew your feelings. He knew your fears, sorrows and your emotional triggers. He knew how you liked your tea in the afternoons. He knew you couldn’t fall asleep without reading before bed each night. And he knew you dreamed of a life free from the pain and suffering you’d been forced to live since your fifth year.

That’s why Sebastian never spoke a word of his feelings for you. You were strong and sensible; kind and clever. You were brilliant in every way possible; beautiful inside and out, worthy of all the admiration you received. He decided he was too weak and insignificant to ever deserve you. He was reckless and weak; he gave in to dark magic and it nearly ruined his life – and yours. You deserved a world of warmth and prosperity. Sebastian carried too much darkness. 

Of course, Sebastian had spent every day since Solomon’s death trying to make up for it. You were proud of the work he’d put in to resurrect himself from the dark cavern he’d been drawn to because of that relic. You often told him so, because you wanted him to forgive himself and see himself as someone who deserved to be happy.

But Sebastian loved you far too much to risk tainting you with any more of his poison. So instead of simply telling you how much you meant to him, he remained in the shadows as a bystander, witnessing all the ways your glow captivated anyone privileged enough to cross your path.

Of course you’d chosen Amit, Sebastian thought. Amit was polished and smart, generous and astute. He calculated life with consideration rather than sprinting headfirst without reason the way Sebastian did. Amit had a wealth of information and creativity, always writing in his stacks of notebooks or gazing at the stars in awe. The only thing that left Sebastian in awe was you. You were his North Star.

As you returned to the school grounds, you spotted a familiar figure sulking by the lake. You said goodbye to Amit and tread carefully toward Sebastian.

“Seb,” you said, pulling your sweater tightly around yourself. The early stages of fall were creeping across the Highlands, bringing a new chill to the air. “Seb, what are you doing out here?”

“Nothing,” Sebastian answered tersely. You flinched at his coarse tone. Sure, Sebastian could be brooding and moody, but not usually toward you. He adored you.

You and Sebastian were closer than ever. The events of your fifth year left you both fragile and forlorn; you, because you lost your mentor, Professor Fig, while the repository remained your burden to bear; Sebastian, because he lost more than his uncle when Anne refused to forgive him. The two of you were left with each other, so you leaned inward and formed a bond that could only be understood by two people who shared an unspeakable trauma.

Then you killed Victor Rookwood and Anne Sallow’s curse was lifted. When she began to heal, so did her relationship with Sebastian. He had you to thank for it, and you were merely happy to see him smile again. It brought you even closer.

But something shifted as time passed. You and Sebastian remained bonded, but the new layers of adulthood began to stack between you. He watched your classmates eye you like candy in the corridors. You listened to them whisper and giggle when Sebastian returned tanned and taller after a summer growth spurt.

But for all the rumors and mumblings about the nature of your relationship with Sebastian – “Are they together yet? Is it true they snogged in the Restricted Section? Will they or won’t they?” – you and Sebastian had never broached the subject. 

It broke your heart every single day. Everyone else thought you and Sebastian belonged together. So did you. But you were merely one half of the equation and Sebastian never seemed to count you as a love interest.

“Sebastian, what’s wrong?” you asked, frowning at his cool demeanor.

“Just hanging out,” he said simply. He skipped a flat rock across the water, scattering a cluster of butterflies that hovered near the surface.

“Why weren’t you in Hogsmeade?” you asked innocently.

“Didn’t feel like it.”

“Why not?”

“Why do you care?”

You swallowed, hurt by the way he was lashing out. He was known to have a short fuse – his emotions often got the best of him – but he always treated you with more delicate tact.

His eyes always softened when he looked at you. His touch became gentler and his words became tender. You were the calm to his storm, so it scared you to see dark clouds in his eyes.

“Sebastian, what is wrong?” you demanded. “Have I done something?”

“Other than Amit Thakkar? No. Well, unless you include Larson and Weasley too.”

“What? What do they have to do with-”

“It doesn’t matter,” Sebastian snapped.

You narrowed your eyes at him. “Are you angry at me for going to Hogsmeade with Amit?”

“Doesn’t matter,” he repeated.

“It does matter,” you pushed back. “It wasn’t a date. In fact, I was helping him plan a date. With Poppy.”

“What?” Sebastian finally pulled his gaze from the lake to turn toward you, his own eyes narrowed in confusion.

“I was helping Amit form a plan to ask Poppy out,” you said. “He’s fancied her forever.”

“Oh.”

“What’s this about, Seb? Is that really why you’ve been pouting here by the lake all day?”

“I wasn’t pouting.”

You rolled your eyes and hugged your arms around his torso, resting your head against his back. You did this often, as it always seemed to relax Sebastian when he was moody. 

“Tortured and forlorn isn’t a good look on you,” you quipped before you released him. 

He sighed and turned to look at you. “Sorry. I suppose I’m just feeling a bit down, is all,” Sebastian said.

“I know,” you said gently. “I know it’s nearly Halloween.”

Halloween was a difficult time of year for Sebastian. The holiday wasn’t fun and frivolous for him the way it was for others. For him, it was the anniversary of his parents’ death.

Sebastian’s lips thinned as he stilled himself. You reached downward to give his hand a gentle squeeze and spent the remainder of the afternoon comforting him by the quiet lake.

---

Later that evening, you sat with Ominis Gaunt and Anne Sallow in the Undercroft. Sebastian had trudged off to bed, leaving the three of you to continue your Ancient Runes studies. 

The Undercroft was quiet as your quill scratched quietly over parchment, a stark contrast from the roar happening inside your head. Finally, you tossed your quill onto the table and sat back in your chair. Anne looked up at your sudden movement and Ominis leaned forward.

“I’m worried about Sebastian,” you said.

“Get in line,” Ominis muttered dryly.

“I know the anniversary of your parents’ death is approaching, but I think it’s more than that,” you sighed as you looked at Anne, who nodded in understanding. “He just seems so… sulky.”

“Sulky?” Ominis mused. “I suppose that’s one word for it.”

“So you’ve noticed it too?”

“Of course, I have,” Ominis said. 

“You’re right, it’s not just our parents,” Anne said. She and Ominis shared a glance that made you uncomfortable, as if they knew something you didn’t.

“What is it?” you demanded with a frown.

“We think he’s lovesick,” Anne said with a soft laugh. You blinked as you processed her words, your stomach deflating as if she’d punched you there.

Sebastian was in love. That was the hardest pill to swallow, but the fact that he hadn’t told you made it even more painful. He told you everything. 

“Lovesick?” you repeated. “Sebastian?” Anne nodded while Ominis folded his arms across his chest, the faint hint of a smile tugging at the corners of his lips. “But he hasn’t mentioned anyone to me. And I haven’t seen him with anyone lately.”

It was Ominis’ turn to blink. “He isn’t dating anyone,” he said. “He’s distraught over someone he thinks he can’t have.”

“Who?” you pressed. “Is it Nerida? Because-”

“Oh, please.” Ominis snorted. “Sebastian wouldn’t be arsed over someone as scatterbrained as Nerida Roberts. Give him some more credit than that.”

“But I heard they hooked up.”

“Even if they did, she’s not the one Sebastian’s pining after,” Anne remarked.

“Then who?”

Another silent exchange of glances and you glared at your friends. “What aren’t you telling me?” you demanded, hurt that they were keeping a secret from you. There were no secrets when it came to Sebastian and you.

“And I thought Ravenclaws were smart,” Ominis teased. 

“Why won’t you tell me?” you pushed, your hurt frustrating beginning to surge. It was bad enough Sebastian was in love with someone else, but your friends withholding it from you twisted the knife deeper.

“We don’t need to tell you,” Anne said. You couldn’t decide if she was amused or annoyed.

“Why not? I clearly have no idea who it is.”

“Clearly,” Ominis said dryly.

“So then tell me!”

“We can’t,” Anne said simply. “If it isn’t obvious to you, you aren’t ready to know.”

Tears stung your eyes at your friends’ callousness. Was this their payback for the secrets you kept from them your fifth year? Of course, you’d never told them how you felt about Sebastian. How could you? Ominis would tell you to run far, far away from your chaotic friend. And Anne was his sister. She’d never understand.

“Fine,” you snapped, shuffling your parchment and quills into a pile. You shoved your chair back as you rose to your feet and gathered your study materials in your arms. “It’s also obvious to me I’m not meant to know, so I suppose I’ll call it a night.”

You scurried from the Undercroft, hurt and confused.

---

The following day, Sebastian seethed over his breakfast. He watched you from the Slytherin table as you laughed with your fellow Ravenclaws. Andrew Larson was leaning in particularly close to you and Sebastian hated the way he was looking at you. Sebastian looked at you the same way.

He couldn’t help it. He didn’t want to lust over his best friend, but everything you did, every move you made, forced him into a wild spiral. Sometimes he even forgot how to string together a coherent sentence when you were around, like when you’d subconsciously bite your bottom lip while deep in thought, or the time you fell into a creek and he could see through your blouse.

Sebastian was so busy glaring daggers at Andrew, he didn’t notice the arrival of Ominis and Anne. Anne turned to see the source of her brother’s miffed expression and sighed as she sat down.

“Sebastian, stop,” she scolded. “If you scowl any more, you’re going to accidentally hex half the Ravenclaw table.”

“Wouldn’t be the worst thing in the world if it includes Larson,” Sebastian muttered as he tore his gaze away.

“What’s wrong with Larson?” Anne asked. “He seems nice enough.”

“Don’t be so daft,” Sebastian mumbled. Anne set down her water goblet as her eyes pierced Sebastian with annoyance.

“Sebastian, this has got to stop,” she said forcefully. “You’re acting insufferable.”

“She’s right,” Ominis chimed in. “All of this moping about is becoming unbearable. Just tell her already.”

“Tell who what?”

“Who’s the daft one now?” Anne clucked her tongue. “Come on, Sebastian. It’s clearer than crystal. Everyone knows you’re in love with her.”

“In love with who?”

“Don’t insult my intelligence,” Anne snapped. “Now either tell her or we will.”

“You won’t say a word,” Sebastian threatened. “Mind your business.”

“You’re making it our business with your sour attitude,” Anne said. “We can’t stand it anymore. And frankly, neither can she. You’re just lucky she’s too in love with you to gain any sense.”

“She’s what?”

Anne sat back and smirked. “Come on now,” she continued. “Even you aren’t this dense.”

“Did she say something to you?” Sebastian demanded.

“No,” Anne said simply. “Sometimes the truth is in what we don’t say.”

---

After dinner, you decided to check on Sebastian. You hadn’t seen much of him that day, but you had seen the way he seemingly scowled at you in the Great Hall.

You descended the stairs of Ravenclaw Tower to make the trek toward the Slytherin Dungeons. But as you approached the Quad Courtyard, you were met by Anne.

“There you are!” she exclaimed, causing you to stop dead in your tracks.

“Anne? What are you doing here?”

“I’ve been looking for you. Have you forgotten about your detention?”

“Detention?” 

“Remember, for last week’s Potions incident?”

“But that wasn’t me. That was all Garreth’s f-”

“But Sharp gave you both detention for it, remember?” Anne asked. “He said you were complicit in the explosion since you were Weasley’s partner that day.”

“But…” your voice trailed off as you racked your brain to remember. You couldn’t recall Professor Sharp scolding you or giving you detention. Surely, you would have remembered that.

“You need to get down to the Detention Chamber,” Anne said urgently. “You’re fifteen minutes late.”

“But-”

“Go! Sharp’s already livid. He sent me because I happened to be walking by. Weasley’s already there.”

You groaned. How did you forget? This surely meant you’d receive a second detention for your tardiness. 

“Alright,” you sighed. “I’m on my way.” You thanked Anne and hurried to the dungeons.

“Sorry I’m late, professor!” you exclaimed as you shoved your way through the door to the Detention Chamber. You froze when it became clear Professor Sharp wasn’t there. Neither was Garreth Weasley. Sebastian was the only other occupant, sitting at the front of the room.

“Where’s Sharp?” you asked, confused.

“Sharp? No idea,” Sebastian answered, looking equally confused. “Where’s Binns?”

“Binns?”

“He apparently gave me detention for falling asleep in class last week,” Sebastian explained. “I don’t even remember it. But Anne said-”

“Anne said you had detention?” Your brow furrowed as your suspicion spiked. “But Anne told me-”

A sudden click from the door behind you made you whirl around. You reached for the door handle and found it was locked.

“Hey!” you shouted. “There’s people in here! Unlock the door!”

“No.” 

Your eyes widened at the voice on the other side of the door. “Anne?”

“We’re not letting you out until the two of you confess,” Anne’s voice said.

“Confess? Confess what? And who’s we?” Sebastian appeared next to you, his arms crossed as he frowned at the door. 

“You know what,” Anne’s voice replied pointedly.

“What’s she talking about?” you asked, turning to stare at Sebastian. He shrugged.

“I have no idea. Anne, open the door.”

“No.”

“Ominis? Are you out there too? Are you in on this?” Sebastian asked.

“Yes,” came Ominis’ voice.

Sebastian cursed. Neither of you had your wands – students had to place them in a lock box outside the chamber upon entry so that you couldn’t use magic during detention. The box wouldn’t unlock itself until the full detention was served.

“Let us out!” you shouted at the door. “This is ridiculous! You can’t keep us in here!”

“You can and we will,” Anne responded. “We’ll be back soon.”

You pressed your ear to the door and could hear their footsteps fading down the corridor. You sighed and turned to press your back against the door.

“What’s this about?” you demanded, your eyes narrowing at Sebastian.

“I don’t know,” he said as he ran a hand through his already tousled hair.

“What do they want you to confess?” you asked.

“They said ‘the two of you,’” Sebastian pointed out. “We’re both meant to confess something.”’

“Confess what? We don’t keep secrets from one another.”

Sebastian sighed and paced toward the front of the classroom. He leaned forward against the large desk at the front of the room, his hands gripping the desktop while he appeared deep in thought. 

“They think we… have feelings for each other,” he said, his back still to you as he gazed downward at the desktop.

“What?!”

“They think you and I have romantic attractions,” he said. He turned to face you and crossed his arms again. 

“You can’t be serious,” you laughed nervously. Heat began to creep up the back of your neck. “Why do they think that?” Sebastian gazed at you with tired eyes that startled you. Your tense posture slackened as you frowned in concern. “Sebastian? Are you okay?”

“No,” he said quietly. “I’m not. I’m exhausted.”

“Do you want to sit down?” you asked as you crossed the chamber to approach him. “Maybe you’re ill.”

The conversation you had with Anne and Ominis drifted to the front of your mind. 

“We think he’s lovesick,” Anne had said.

You paused. Dare you ask? What if the answer killed you?

“Sebastian,” you started carefully. “Are you… have you got a crush on someone? Is that why you’ve been so moody lately? Anne mentioned you’ve seemed a little lovesick.”

And to your absolute, utter shock, Sebastian began to laugh. Dread coursed through your blood as you waited for him to regain his composure. 

“Anne’s right, this really is unbearable,” he said as he shook his head. He sighed again and rubbed a hand over his face, so you closed more distance and leaned backward against a desk across from him.

Sebastian’s eyes roamed you up and down. It made you shift uncomfortably from one foot to the other.

“The answer is yes,” he finally continued. “I do have feelings for someone. That’s what Anne and Ominis want me to confess.”

“Who? Who do you have feelings for?” you asked, ignoring the sting that was twisting shards of heartache inside your chest.

Sebastian’s expression didn’t change. His eyes lingered on you as he seemed to be fighting impatience.

“You really don’t know?” he asked.

“Why does everyone keep asking me that?” you complained. “Clearly I don’t.”

Sebastian dug the palms of his hands against his eyes as if seeing clearer might make you see clearer. “They keep asking because the answer is obvious,” he said. “The answer is you.”

His words seemed to hover between you, an invisible line begging to be crossed. All you had to do was break the plane.

“Me?” you asked stupidly.

Sebastian couldn’t help but smile at the naivety plastered all over your face. “Yes, you,” he answered. “It really can’t be that much of a surprise, can it? I haven’t exactly been subtle about it.”

“I thought you were just being protective of me,” you said breathlessly. The cool dungeon felt hot and your hands were clammy. This wasn’t happening. You had to be lost in one of your countless dreams about Sebastian, fantasizing over all the ways he’d show you how much he loved you.

“I was,” Sebastian said simply. “I was protecting you from me.”

“What?”

Sebastian paced in front of the desk. “You deserve so much more than someone like me,” he confessed. “I mean, look at you. You’re… everything. I’m just the fool who got lucky enough to call you a friend.”

“Sebastian, that’s not for you to decide,” you said, your eyes still wide at the stunning revelation. “You don’t get to pick for me. And I’ll always pick you.”

“What?”

Suddenly, you understood the frustration that Anne and Ominis felt. You were stunned the two hadn’t strangled you and Sebastian both by now. You were no longer angry with them; you were grateful.

“This is all so ridiculous,” you breathed with a laugh. You stepped toward Sebastian and it was his turn to look surprised. “Sebastian, can we both just confess already?”

“You… you really mean it? You’re not just trying to get out of here?”

“On the contrary,” you said as you took another step toward him. “I’m trying to make the most of our time.”

You grabbed him by the front of his jumper and pulled him into a kiss. It was soft at first, but you grew hungry for more until your hands became balls of taut wool and your tongue was dragging along Sebastian’s bottom lip.

His hands snapped to your waist and pulled you against his body as he kissed you deeper. His tongue clashed with yours until you were gasping for air.

“Wait,” you laughed as you broke apart to catch your breaths. “We still need to confess.”

“I love you,” Sebastian said immediately. His eyes were heavy with a new level of affection that was foreign to you. It made your chest swell and heart race.

“I love you too,” you breathed. Sebastian smiled and leaned in to kiss you more gently this time. 

“This was a lot easier than I thought it’d be,” you murmured once he pulled away.

Sebastian laughed as his thumbs traced gentle circles over your hip. He smiled at you with so much love and lust, your knees would surely give out. Luckily, you had a solution for that.

You pulled him into another forceful kiss, tugging on his jumper until he moved away from the desk. You spun so that your own back was pressed against it, pulling him into you until he lifted you onto the desktop. You wrapped your legs around him, your hands tugging at the hem of his jumper.

You could already feel his erection digging into the skin of your thigh. You’d never wanted anything so badly in your life.

You slipped the sweater over his head and dragged your palms over his bare chest, the feeling of his skin sending shockwaves through your fingertips. You couldn’t believe you were finally touching him in the sinful manner that only existed in your forbidden fantasies.

“Can I take this off?” Sebastian asked as his fingers grazed the top button of your blouse. 

“If you don’t, I will,” you replied. He grinned at your response and kissed you.

Once all the buttons were parted, Sebastian shoved your shirt onto the desk behind you. His hands skimmed over your waist and held your hips as he pulled you hard against him, your inner thigh grinding against his erection. 

You decided you hated the feeling of his trousers against your skin. You fumbled with his belt buckle and zipper until you could shove his remaining clothing to the floor, freeing his cock from the layers of fabric.

Your breath hitched at the sight of it. Sex wasn’t new to you but someone of that size certainly was. You internally scolded yourself for depriving yourself from this for so long.

Sebastian’s hands snaked beneath the hem of your skirt, the pads of his fingers stroking the tops of your thighs. He licked his lips at the heat radiating from your body. 

As he leaned in to kiss you, one of his hands found the apex between your thighs, grazing two fingers over the fabric of your panties. 

“Fucking hell,” he groaned as he felt the moisture of the fabric. He planted a trail of kisses from your neck across your collarbone, stopping with one final peck to your right shoulder.

His thumb brushed patterns over your entrance and you whimpered in frustration at the fabric separating your flesh. Sebastian smirked and inched your panties to the side with his thumb and index finger until your entrance was exposed. His thumb returned, this time running up and down over your wet folds. You could feel his cock twitch against your thigh.

But he had to taste you first. His lips left a trail of kisses from your neck and between your breasts until he lowered himself to a kneeling position. One more kiss followed above your belly button until he was pushing your skirt hem upward. He eyed your most precious asset and attacked it with his tongue.

Your gasp hissed throughout the chamber on contact. The sounds of Sebastian’s tongue immersed in your folds was music to your ears as he hummed a moan into your flesh. The vibration made you buck your hips forward.

His tongue swiped patterns over your clit until you fisted his hair in your hands. You pressed your fingertips into his skull, begging him for more pressure. He obliged, his tongue flattening and flicking against your clit until you were moaning repeatedly.

His lips enclosed your clit and he sucked against it, the sound drawing scowls from the portrait paintings on the walls.

“Don’t stop,” you breathed, your eyelids heavy as you gazed at the erotic vision between your legs. 

Sebastian sucked harder, the tip of his tongue pressed against your clit until your thighs twitched in his hands. You were afraid to know what it’d be like to fall apart on Sebastian’s tongue – not because you were embarrassed or self-conscious, but because you knew it would ruin you for life.

And when it finally started, the sweet sensation shooting through your nerve endings in the form of a convulsion across your cunt, you forced your hips forward as Sebastian’s tongue danced against your clit. Your shaking thighs clamped either side of his head and he groaned at the surge of wet arousal that surfaced from your entrance. His tongue glided inside you to collect the reward of your climax.

As you recovered, your chest rising and falling while you caught your breath, Sebastian kissed both of your thighs and stood, smirking at you with sensual eyes as he returned to his standing position between your legs.

You realized the top of your thigh was wet from the tip of his cock. You took it in your hand and stroked, your thumb appreciating the sensation of its velvet head. Your core began to throb with desire for it.

“I need you. Now,” you whispered. You didn’t need to ask twice.

Sebastian lined the tip of his cock against your entrance and took a moment to behold the sight. He decided he’d burn the entire castle down if he were to wake up and learn this was merely another dream.

But the feeling of your slick, warm arousal coating the head of his cock was far too real. He moaned at the sight of himself disappearing inside your entrance. He sank further into you while you held your breath at the size of him. 

“Relax,” Sebastian said gently. “I’ve got you.”

You nodded silently and exhaled, willing the tension to vacate your body. Sebastian continued to ease himself inside of you, his jaw clenched at the sensation of your walls stretching to accommodate him. 

“My god,” Sebastian groaned as his gaze drifted downward to where you were joined. You bucked your hips to indicate your readiness. 

Sebastian pushed his hips forward, his cock parting your walls again. You moaned at the pressure mounting within your core. 

His cock drove steady strokes against your walls as his hands gripped the tops of your thighs. You whined for more, your hips rocking forward as the desk creaked beneath you. 

You clutched Sebastian’s shoulders to pull him closer. He snapped his hips harder, the sounds of his thrusts growing louder as they became more erratic. 

Your legs clenched around his torso tightly, willing him to drive deeper inside you. You could feel the smoldering climax searing hotter within your twitching walls. When it finally began, your tight cunt released, pumping pleasure through your walls while you cried out. 

Your nails sank into Sebastian’s shoulder blades, leaving sharp crescent divots in his skin. Sebastian’s cock pumped you through your orgasm until your twitching cunt was spent. 

Sebastian’s hands drifted to your back, a flick of his fingers snapping your bra apart. He flung it onto the floor behind himself and buried himself inside you again. 

He kissed you hard, easing you backward until you were lying flat on your back. He couldn’t help himself from roaming his hands over your body, cupping and squeezing your breasts as he slammed into you. You moaned as he gripped your hips, pulling you into him as he fucked you. 

“Oh my god,” he moaned. The sight of you, splayed out flat on your back, breasts bouncing with each thrust, was better than any vision his head could conjure. 

The smacking of your bodies chorused across the chamber, your whimpered moans growing louder in rhythm with them. The delicious incline to another peak was mounting in your core, bringing you so close to the edge of ecstasy. 

Sebastian reached down to drag a thumb over your clit, nudging you to the climactic cliff. The sound you released was anything but subdued; an unrestrained wail as your walls convulsed around Sebastian’s driving cock, sending your back into an arch as you clamped your eyes shut. 

The aftermath was more than Sebastian could handle; your heaving chest panting for air; your heavy eyes dark with satisfaction; your arousal slowly dripping onto the desktop. 

Sebastian thrusted hard until his cock was fully enveloped in your warmth again, his tip buried deep within your plush walls. He grunted as he held you against himself, his cock throbbing with his own climax until he painted your core with his release. 

“Fucking hell,” he groaned once it was over. 

He slumped forward. It felt as if his frame might collapse amid its boneless state. Beneath him, you were grateful for the desk keeping you off the ground. 

Once you felt lucid enough to move again, you sat up slowly. Sebastian dipped his head to rest his chin against your forehead as you both recovered in silence. He didn’t want to part from you, so he remained still, savoring your warmth as he draped his arms around you. 

“You really didn’t think I was in love with you?” you murmured softly against his chest. 

“You really didn’t realize I was in love with you?” he mused.

“We really do owe Anne and Ominis an apology,” you laughed softly. “Or a thank-you.”

The door suddenly creaked open and the sound of hurried footsteps stopped with a sharp halt. Anne stood in the doorway, her face twisted in an expression of horror as Ominis stood behind her, unaware of the sight before them. 

Sebastian winced at the intrusion.  “We should probably start with an apology.”

[daradiostarz]

Cults & Society: The Petersons and the American Dream.

I've never seen anyone in the fandom attempt to discuss this, especially the books. I wouldn't blame you if you took the Aaron trilogy at face value, and to an extent, I only know slightly what the Forest Protector Society cult is on a surface level.

But as someone who is researching on HN1/HN2's inspirations, I cannot ignore Hello Neighbour's (possibly unintentional) symbolism to this, as it was a occurring theme in those media.

So we'll start with very surface-level stuff:

Just like the top of those images, next to the Petersons: they are the poster children of the American suburb's dreams that were advertised back in the '40s to '60s:

The Husband, Wife, and their two kids that was usually a son and daughter.

Even to the tee of the kids looking like their gendered parents.

This is also very important as everyone outside the Petersons is actually an unconventional household:

Nicky despite having both parents, Luanne has never been a traditional homemaker, the closest to that role is Jay (Very well aware Diane is a school teacher too but that was around the end of the Aaron trilogy not the start of it and I also have a comparison between those two). Usually, that kind of dynamic was unheard of and frowned upon.

The same applies to the Esposito and Yis are both single parents specifically on the widow and widower side, usually, stepparents would fill the role of that absent-gendered parent so they could go back to that very rigid gender role they were thrust upon.

Though the Bales also have both parents, there are few depictions of families with just a daughter. As having a son to carry family last names was more thrust upon the society.

Stay with me, so this is no surprise to anybody as much as those pictures depict a happy idyllic family in most depictions of media of this family structure (Especially HN's inspo media: Twin Peaks) They HEAVILY critique how this family structure is rigid if not hurting the individual rather than helping especially when the country at the time really pushed this very heavily: woman was forced to be financially depended on her husband and the man having zero help emotionally but to keep providing the family.

And if things took the worst like let's say a domestic dispute it was only till the 1970s that divorce became more accessible so these people were stuck in these marriages.

And for children, as much Bronisław Malinowski saw the good of this family structure it can take the worse if children take the brunt of the abuse as that period had a "Children should be seen not heard." mentality which you can understand how this will fucked the children up for life.

"Okay yeah they are essentially the American Family but what does this have to do with the Forest Protectors?"

What was the biggest goal of the cult?

Fortune, good luck, a dream if you say... And well we know what the American dream represents but this is the reward for these kinds of Family Values....

Despite that by the end of the Aaron trilogy, Theodore came out the husk of a man he once was, maybe worse. For Ted, he was ruined by the cult and destroyed his image of a renowned theme park designer for the kids, real life?

Breadwinner men like Ted end up chasing that dream, some achieve it and definitely reap the rewards... Some never, but it was something to "look forward to" while those who made the movement made sure they still kept their condition so they can exploit that for the rest of their waking lives till their children is next and they'll be exploited the same way.

And if you have nobody to take this out on, who else but the family you come back to every day?

Now I don't think in general the nuclear family is a bad dynamic there is no perfect family dynamic just the one that works the best, but for HN and what I believe is the criticism of conservatism and how it affects the generation after that, it is something to be very introspective.

Someday I'll do Diane and the kids cause this will get longer than it should be as well as generational trauma and what I believe HN1 was all about which was breaking the cycle (despite it not coming from the son but the son's friend but uh... We got some terrible news for the son).

[singingcicadas]

More thoughts on Cyclonus.

Nova's evaluation of him in this panel is brutally accurate. That last sentence. Ouch.

On the surface level Cyclonus appears to be portrayed as this stiff proud warrior with an austere, diehard take on his own internal code of honour and patriotism, but the more I think about it his actual character is pretty much the opposite? He doesn't have any hardfast values or stances of his own aside from shallow romanticism for the preachings of others.

His whole life is comprised of hanging onto other people. First it's Nova and his group, despite Nova and Jhiaxius looking down on him and insulting him to his face and being very forthright about the actual purpose of their mission, which Cyclonus apparently had different ideals about. Theoretically. But he didn't say anything after Nova corrected him.

Then it's Galvatron, after Galvatron backstabbed Nova. Even when Galvatron became increasingly unhinged and violent toward him and also started insulting him to his face, he still continued to follow Galvatron around because Galvatron's powerful, hope he stays on our side.

Then after he broke off from Galvatron post-Chaos Theory he joined the Lost Light, an Autobot ship, despite not liking Autobots, because it had something that he wanted: the chance to start again.

His defense for murdering all those people in Kimia is literally "he made me do it." That's all he can come up with. He even knows it's a bad excuse.

And he always corrects people when they assume he's a Decepticon. Here he directly says that he doesn't want to be a Decepticon. Why not, if he clearly admires their ideology?

One possible reason is maybe he doesn't like their ideology that much. Enough to romanticize it from a safe distance but not enough to commit to it himself (since doing that would force him to do actual introspection about his own role in what made the Decepticon ideology so appealing in the first place). Second reason's simpler: Decepticons have to wear inhibitor chips. No thanks. They're the losing side.

Once on board the Lost Light he followed Rodimus' command fine despite Rodimus accusing him of murdering Red Alert without any proof. Then after he developed a relationship with Tailgate, he put Tailgate up on a pedestal and made Tailgate the center of his universe.

But then there's also this 🔽 after he thought Tailgate dumped him:

I don't even know what he's trying to do there😂

His lack of true conviction is evident in the little things too: he thinks it's unethical for Rodimus to perform mnemosurgery on Tailgate while he's unconscious and unable to give consent but drops the subject after Rodimus distracted him with fireworks. He thinks that mutiliating an enemy's corpse is appalling but doesn't say anything when Rodimus said they were going to use Skip's corpse as a shuttle to get off Necroworld. It's Nautica who raised ethical objections, not him. He's supposed to be really religious but when the guiding hand did their big reveal at the end of Lost Light, he got nearly zero lines because of compressed screentime except to argue with Epistemus over sending Tailgate into danger.

I guess what I'm trying to say is that Cyclonus is essentially a go-with-the-flow sort of person. Nothing he holds is uncompromisable. Not his ideals, not his values, not his pride, not his faith. To an extent, not even his love for Tailgate, at least not completely, because he left when Tailgate told him to leave even when he suspected that Tailgate was lying about not loving him without making more of an effort to understand why. It all depends on the person he's hanging on to at the moment. And his choice of which leader to follow is ultimately based on self-serving reasons. This pattern is first broken when he turns on Galvatron, then fully subverted after he learns to love Tailgate as a sign of character growth.

He's not an intrinsically cruel or callous person. The way he learns to love Tailgate, befriend Whirl, and being kind and supportive to everyone when Rodimus left him in charge on the Necroworld are all attestments of his better nature. Water takes the shape of the container in which it's kept; surround him with people like Galvatron and Nova and he'll be their murder machine. Put him in the company of people who's mostly decent like the Lost Light crew and he'll grow into a compassionate person and a reliable friend.

[supersoakerfullofblood]

Why You Shouldn't Care About Theme (as a writer)

"Theme" is another word like "worldbuilding" and "plot hole" that writers put way too much stock into without clear definition. It's often thought to be one of the most important things in your story, one of the defining traits of creative writing, but it can be hard to pin down, and some pervasive definitions are actively harmful to the writing process. Let's talk about that.

A common misconception about theme is that it's the story's "message." Under this definition, a theme of The Great Gatsby would be that generation wealth is a hollow substitute for genuine human enrichment, love, etc. A theme of Hamlet would be to not kill yourself. But this idea of a book's message misses the point of why we read at all. Reading is a relationship between the author and the reader; to interpret text, the author puts their experiences in writing, and you bring your experiences to its reading. In other words, you as the reader create meaning from a story. You give the story its messages. The author's only purpose is to transcribe their worldview and experiences, and the best authors can sway the empathy of the reader towards those experiences. Anything greater than this, any book that moralizes, preaches, dictates, is gaudy, emotional propaganda. Imagine a novel where throughout the book, the author is telling you about the toxic environmental effects of unwalkable cities. While true, narrative fiction is a realm of characters and story, not essays. Readers pull meaning from a novel because they think and feel about a character's struggle and relate it to their own. So a message about The Great Gatsby is that generation wealth is hollow because we as readers live in an age of unprecedented wealth disparity; a message about Hamlet is to not kill yourself because we as readers have felt pretty down in the dumps sometimes and have maybe thought about suicide. But our experiences could be different: if we're generationally wealthy, we might read Gatsby as a celebration; if we have an awful stepfather, we might read Hamlet first as a story of revenge than of introspection. Strong authors make you sympathize with the experiences they've gone through--Fitzgerald himself was a wealthy, popular man and saw firsthand the effects of wealth, and Shakespeare probably felt rough around the emotional edges at times--but ultimately, deciding a text's "messages" is up to the reader.

So if we can't control the messages of our writing, what is theme? I like to think of it as "whatever a text is about," and that about word carries some ambiguity. Is Gatsby about money? Yes, but there's more to that. You can think right now about a plot element your WIP is about, but as authors, we want to find that greater depth. That's what we call theme.

Common writing advice tells you to plot out your theme, that greater depth, before drafting the novel. Figure out that Gatsby is a story about generational wealth being a hollow substitute for romance before anything else. But when you think about it, this is crazy advice. Themes like this can only come from our characters and how they interact with the world, and how our characters act is always going to stray in some way away from our plans for them. Writing that deeper theme, then, is impossible to plan (unless you're the most extreme plotter and have found success like that, then keep doing what you're doing. But you reading this almost certainly are not in that camp, let's be honest). So how do we get there?

Before you start drafting, think about the surface-level "abouts." Don't go deep yet. Just think about what's pressing on your mind. If you want to take a very slight moralistic bent here, do so, but be sure not to go into specifics (that's for the characters to do). For my first novel, I wanted to write about friendship responsibilities, family responsibilities, and friendship; for my second novel, church camp, romance, and evangelical culture; for my current novel, the role of story in culture, honor, familial trauma, and cultural perceptions of gender. Some of these took on moral detail--evangelical culture is bad--but most didn't. As you're writing, your characters will discover that deeper meaning. Again, your characters have to and will by nature of being part of the narrative. Your readers interact with the story, not with you.

In my first novel, I came to the thematic conclusion that too many responsibilities degrade individual identity, but too few leave someone empty; in the second novel, I concluded that evangelical culture places restrictive boxes on what romance looks like, and on how to interact with and resolve traumatic events. But I didn't come up with these--my characters did, and I learned from them in the exact same way any reader would. Similarly, a reader might interact with my characters and come to completely different conclusions. This is normal, okay, and encouraged.

You may also find other themes popping up as you write. In my second novel, popularity and social capital became a huge cog in the machine. Let these fresh themes surprise you, and run with them.

Ultimately, you can't control what your readers take away from your story. Your goal as a writer is to create characters so rich and deep and intimate (not in the romantic sense, unless you're into that) that the reader can bring their experiences to the text and find meaning. We cannot worry about this before starting a writing project, because we can't control it, and thinking too much about it will muddy the waters of what actually matters, what we can affect. And when you start to sense those deeper meanings emerging in your story, run with them, flesh them out, and embody them in the struggles of characters.

[prettyshon10]

On the Subject of Sinners and Christian Push Back

I have quite a few pet peeves, and one of them is when people go out of their way to feel uncomfortable and complain about it.

I'm a Christian woman. I absolutely LOVED Sinners. I've gone to see it twice now, and am fighting the urge not to go see it a third time for the sake of my wallet. I've gone with different people both times, most of whom are also Christian. I've recommended it in high regards to those who haven't seen it, yet (who, too, are Christian), in certainty that they would also find enjoyment in it. The one time I felt any type of wierdness watching the film was during the particularly spicy moments--and that's only because my parents were right next to me (watching cunnilingus with your parents is freakin awkward). Not only did I adore this film, but the transition from seeing it (again) Saturday night to arriving to Easter Service Sunday morning felt amazing. The celebration of Black music woven into the story made me feel wonderful walking into church and immediately seeing a choir full of booming Black voices. I almost teared up.

It's no secret that anytime a form of media (specifically Black media) gains traction, the "Demonic" claims aren't too far behind. Now I have a seperate post rambling about the full scope of my thoughts on the film coming, so I'll keep this to the point. This movie is deep, and inspires so much conversation. I believe there's a lot that Christian viewers can get out of watching it and discuss. However, people can't converse with brick walls. If you know that you have no interest in these introspections, if you know that the subject matters within a horror-genre vampire movie literally titled Sinners are going to offend you, then WHY are you spending time and money to see it?

I want this film to have all the support and success it can, but it makes no sense to engage with something you already have disdain for. Again, I highly encourage watching this movie, but no one is holding a gun to your head. Stop making yourself uncomfortable on purpose if all you're going to do is get upset about it and declare it "evil". God gave you free will.

As for those countering these complaints with "It's just fiction; it's not that deep", wait just a minute. Last I checked, one of the praises going around for this movie was for how spiritual it was. It may not be "demonic" or "evil", but it is most definitely deep. Let's not do this film a disservice by calling it surface level just to brush off people who are offended by it.

[pochqmqri]

One change the Railgun anime adaptation does compared to the original manga is introduce Kongou much earlier. In the manga, she isn't introduced until after the Sisters arc, but in the anime, she's introduced in the very first episode of Season 1, and becomes a prominent side character up until the Silent Party arc of Railgun S.

I'm fine with what the anime did, because I think Kongou is one of the more underrated characters in Railgun, and she's great in Silent Party and the Daihasei Festival, but I also feel that the anime cutting out her proper introduction takes out a chunk of her backstory and characterization that makes her truly great.

To start off, there's this running gag where Misaka, trying to break away from a persisent guy, named Unabara, runs into Kongou, the new girl at school, and tries to pretend she's her friend so that she can get away from Unabara. This leads to a misunderstanding where Kongou beleives Misaka's name is Unabara for most of her introductiry chapters, and Misaka is too socially awkward to even introduce herself. It's absolutely hilarious.

Kongou is presented as this haughty ojou-archetype that's too in her pride, such as when she refused to accept help from Kuroko in escorting her to the dorms. Generally these characters can be one-dimensional, but we see with her that there's more than just the surface.

When she was just a little girl, Kongou learned from her father the idea that friends will naturally flock towards one of fine character, which she took the wrong way by allowing her pride and social status to get the better of her. She says to the other girls that they're "allowed" to be friends with her rather than asking directly if they want to be friends, which puts off those girls, who don't accept her indirect birthday invitation.

This reinforces her worldview that because those girls didn't want to hang out with her, they weren't worthy in the first place, rather than focusing on introspection.

Back to current day, and Kongou is the same, even more entrenched in her beliefs, putting herself on a pedestal, that if anyone has a problem with her, it's their fault and not hers. This is why she was immediately drawn to the idea of factions at Tokiwadai, because she desired a clique like the one Shokuhou has.

However, her facade begins to break, as she comes to term with her lonliness underneath all that bravado. She begins to wonder if she's the problem instead.

Her lonliness showed earlier when, after Misaka and Kongou break away from the pushy guy, they start to hang out, which the latter enjoys, stating that she had never done something like that before. But when Misaka finally breaks away at the end, Kongou remembers that this was only born out of a "pretend" situation. Because of the way she grew up, Kongou finds it difficult to be actually honest about her feelings, that all she wanted was a friend.

Misaka comes back to return something to Kongou, which confuses the sheltered girl as she wonders why she'd go through all the effort for her (it's not that relevant to the analysis but Kongou still doesn't know that Misaka is the famed Level 5 Railgun in the school). Misaka replies that it's because she's her friend, which touches the girl, to seemingly be finally considered a friend by someone.

It all comes back full circle at the end, where after Kongou realizes the errors of her ways, the two random girls she met earlier while faction seeking, Wannai and Awatsuki of the swim team, come to Kongou, ask to join her faction. Kongou turns them down, saying that she would rather be friends with them instead, which they accept.

And I think this is just wonderful, it sets up why Kongou, Wannai, and Awatsuki hang out together in the anime and why Kongou is so helpful towards Misaka in the later arcs. She could have easily taken on a more antagonistic and cliquey role like Shokuhou initially has, but her development is actually a joy to read through. It's such a shame that these few chapters weren't properly adapted into the anime.

Kongou is one of my favorite characters in Railgun, one that I find truly underrated, not just for her backstory, but also for how much of a team player she (and the two swim girls) are in the Silent Party and Daihasei Festival arcs. I want to write about that another time.

[fracturediron]

Jin is such an interesting character to think about and why he acts the way he does, as on a surface-level, so much of what he does seems so contradictory. For all that he has feelings for Non and apparently genuinely liked him, his responses to Non's bullying and ostracisation have always been very wishy-washy. Just enough to make a token protest about Non's mistreatment - because he knows what they're doing is shitty, and he feels badly enough and cares enough about Non to say something - but never anything truly concrete or that could alienate him from his friends.

It's kinda ironic how Jin chews out Phee for failing to commit in the present, when in the past, one of Jin's biggest failings was failing to commit to any sort of decisive stand with regards to Non's mistreatment.

He knows what his friends are doing is wrong, and he knows that Non is suffering for it. He stands up for him in a few small ways - and even offers him comfort - but never does he break things with his shitty friends, or truly call them out in a real meaningful way.

When I look at Jin, I think to myself: "Okay. You know what your friends are doing is terrible, and you like Non. Yet you continually to enable their bullying either through your passivity or by straight up trying to keep Non in the group, even though it's blatantly obvious Non's being used and that being with these people is actively harmful for him. So, what kind of person does that make you?"

The kind of person who doesn't want to look too deeply at themselves, or the reality of the people around them, and is not comfortable with introspection. Even in the present, Jin is planning to run away from his problems (rather than acknowledging them) by moving to the USA.

Until ep 7, Jin's convinced that everything will be fine - the others will stop hating Non if he just hangs around long enough! Non's just a sweet, quiet, doe-eyed innocent, a damsel in distress to be saved, and if he sees Jin going to bat him, that just goes to show he's a good guy, right? - and so tries to be the peacekeeper for both sides. He's unwilling to think too hard about the reality and the truth of his friends, because if he acknowledges that, then he has to acknowledge his friends are shitty people, and then what does that also say about him? Time and time again, Jin can't face the truth about his friends and Non, so he wilfully blinds himself in the hopes that it'll all work out in the end.

When he sees Kru Keng and Non together, though, Jin can't blind himself to the sordidness of reality anymore.

[nickeverdeen]

https://www.tumblr.com/nickeverdeen/759892946103468032/accident?source=share

It's okay I can do it lol I might not remember exactly what I said that day but probably it was something in these same waters:

A jesse imagine with a fem!autistic!reader, just the same context as the first hcs you posted for someone a while ago. So, jesse and reader know each other, but this is set before they start dating. They know each other, they have brief talks sometimes (around ellie because she's their common friend, or in the in the gatherings at the millers when everyone is invited for dinners, etc) and, you know, he has a crush on her. Would even be cool to have some details in the imagine like since when he started having feelings for her, what was his first impressions of her, how did he got to know she was autistic (did someone tell him or he noticed something by himself? Or it was just a common knowledge in jackson for everyone?). But because she's introspective with people she doesn't really have intimacy, he finds hard to approach her in a way of finding a connection to her, he doesn't know if he would scare her or make her feel uncomfortable if he was too bold. So he begins to notice (by watching her) that she likes to paint and draw sometimes (he's pretty sure he heard someone say that it was one of her hyperfocus), he sees that she sometimes paints ellie's tattoo with markers or makeup when they hang together on her place, and he's pretty sure he saw Joel sitting on tommy and maria's couch and letting reader draw on his hand with a pen in some of the gatherings, when they were both bored.

So he has an ideia. He goes through his stuff until he finds some sketches his 12 year old self did (In my headcanon, he thought about getting a tattoo when Cat came to town and he found out she did tattoos, but he eventually let that idea go). Well, now he has a pretty good reason to have a tattoo. if it doesn't work, at least it will be covered by his shoulder.

So... Yeah he shows to her by the end lol I won't give details on this one tho, I'm pretty sure her reaction or anything that would be written after this point you would plan better than me.

I love you so much, cariño, and I’m so sorry again that you had to rewrite it

————————————————

A Sketch of Connection | Jesse x autistic fem!reader

Summary: The thriving community is a refuge for survivors, where life is beginning to feel a little more normal for Jesse when he meets you.

———————————

Jesse stood just outside of the mess hall, leaning against the wooden post as he watched the world move around him. His gaze was focused on you, sitting a few yards away with Ellie, both of you engrossed in some quiet activity. He couldn’t help but smile, noting how your concentration on whatever you were doing seemed to block out the noise and chaos of the busy day around you.

He’d been trying to get closer to you for a while now, ever since Ellie introduced you both. She spoke of you often, mentioning your incredible talent for painting and how you seemed to find solace in your art in a way that few others did. Jesse had noticed it too, in the small things—how your hands would twitch and fidget when you were in a room full of people, how loud noises would make you flinch slightly, or how you would sometimes eat your food in a very particular order, as if certain textures didn’t sit well with you.

Ellie had mentioned once, offhandedly, that you were autistic, something Jesse hadn’t fully understood but had since looked into. He learned about stimming, about the sensitivity to certain stimuli, and how social interactions could sometimes be challenging. It made him more aware, more cautious in his approach. He didn’t want to scare you off or make you uncomfortable, but he was desperate to find a way to connect with you beyond the surface-level conversations they shared at Miller’s house during group dinners.

As he watched, he noticed how you seemed completely absorbed in drawing on Ellie’s forearm with a marker, probably adding some intricate design around her tattoo. It wasn’t the first time he’d seen you do that. He’d even seen Joel let you doodle on his hand once, a rare occurrence considering how much Joel guarded his personal space. It was then that an idea started forming in Jesse’s mind—a way to get closer to you, to understand you better, and maybe, just maybe, open a door to something more.

Later that night, he rummaged through his old belongings, finding the sketchbook he’d kept as a kid. Flipping through the pages, he found what he was looking for—an old sketch he’d made when he was about twelve. It was of a wolf, fierce and wild, something he’d thought was cool back then. Jesse had briefly considered getting it tattooed when Cat had passed through Jackson, but the idea had faded away. Now, though, it seemed like the perfect excuse. If nothing else, it would be a conversation starter, a way to share something personal with you.

The next morning, Jesse found himself in front of Cat’s place, the small parlor she’d set up in her spare time, tattooing those who wanted to leave a permanent mark on their skin. He explained what he wanted, showing her the old sketch.

Jesse sat down in the worn, comfortable chair in Cat’s makeshift tattoo parlor, a small room she had converted into her own little artistic haven. The walls were lined with sketches and ink samples, a testament to her skill. He handed her the sketch of the wolf he’d drawn years ago, watching as she studied it with a critical eye.

“This is good,” she said, nodding in approval. “Didn’t know you were an artist, Jesse.”

“Not really,” he replied with a shrug. “Just doodles from when I was a kid.”

Cat raised an eyebrow, still examining the lines of the drawing. “Well, it’s better than half the stuff people bring me. Where do you want it?”

Jesse hesitated, then lifted the edge of his shirt to expose his shoulder. “Here, I think. It’s kinda personal, so I’d like to keep it hidden most of the time.”

“Personal, huh?” Cat murmured, setting up her equipment. She nodded towards the chair, and Jesse shifted to give her better access to his shoulder. As she prepped the area, she kept glancing at him, clearly sensing there was more to the story. “So, what made you finally decide to get it done? This sketch’s been in your drawer for years.”

Jesse bit his lip, debating how much to share. Cat had a way of getting people to open up, even when they weren’t sure they wanted to. “There’s this girl,” he finally admitted, the words coming out quieter than he intended. “Y/N.”

Cat’s hands paused for a moment, and she shot him a knowing look. “Ah, so this is about that pretty girl Ellie’s been talking about.”

Jesse felt his face heat up, but he chuckled. “Yeah, I guess it is. I wanted a reason to talk to her more, something to connect us. She’s… she’s really into art, and I thought maybe if I got this, we could… I don’t know, bond over it?”

Cat smirked, clearly amused. “That’s sweet, Jesse. I didn’t peg you for the romantic type.”

He laughed, a little embarrassed. “Well, I’m not usually, but she’s different, you know? I just want to get to know her better, without scaring her off.”

“You’re doing something right,” Cat said, her voice softer now as she began to work on his tattoo. “From what I hear, Y/N’s not the easiest person to get close to. But you’re willing to take it slow, let her come to you. That’s good. Shows you care.”

Jesse smiled, relaxing into the chair as the familiar buzz of the tattoo machine filled the room. “Yeah, I do. I just hope she sees that.”

Cat worked in silence for a while, focused on her art. When she finished, she wiped down the tattoo and admired her work, giving Jesse a satisfied nod. “Looks good. You’re gonna knock her socks off with this.”

Jesse glanced in the mirror she held up, taking in the new addition to his shoulder. The wolf looked fierce, just like he’d imagined it would all those years ago. But now, it carried a new meaning, one tied to the hope of getting closer to you.

Cat cleaned up her tools, then glanced at Jesse with a teasing grin. “Don’t worry, Jesse. Your pretty girl’s gonna love it. And if she’s smart, she’ll see you for the good guy you are.”

Jesse’s heart skipped a beat at her words, and he couldn’t help but grin back. “Thanks, Cat. I really hope so.”

As he left the parlor, the new tattoo burning slightly under his shirt, Jesse felt more determined than ever to show you just how much you meant to him. And with Cat’s words echoing in his mind, he couldn’t wait to see where this new connection might lead.

He waited a few days before approaching you, nervous about how you might react. One evening, when the sun was beginning to dip behind the mountains, casting a golden glow over Jackson, he spotted you sitting on a bench outside, your sketchbook in your lap. Jesse took a deep breath and walked over, trying to keep his usual easygoing demeanor despite the knot of nerves in his stomach.

“Hey, Y/N,” he greeted, taking a seat next to you. You glanced up, a small smile tugging at your lips, which gave him the courage to continue. “Got a minute?”

“Sure,” you replied softly, closing your sketchbook but keeping your hands fidgeting with the edge of the cover.

He hesitated for a moment, then pulled at the collar of his shirt to reveal his shoulder. “I, uh, got a tattoo the other day. Wanted to show you.”

Your eyes widened slightly, curiosity piqued as you leaned in closer to get a better look. Jesse noticed how your fingers stilled for a moment before you reached out, hesitating just before touching his skin. He nodded, giving you permission, and you gently traced the lines of the tattoo with a featherlight touch.

“It’s… really good,” you murmured, your voice carrying a hint of awe. “The wolf, it looks strong.”

Jesse smiled, relieved by your reaction. “Yeah, it’s something I drew when I was a kid. Thought it would be cool to finally get it inked.”

You nodded, your focus still on the tattoo. “It’s a good design… you used to draw?”

“A little,” he admitted, scratching the back of his neck. “Not as good as you, though. I’ve seen your work—Ellie brags about it all the time.”

A small blush crept up your cheeks, and you looked down, clearly pleased but unsure how to respond. Jesse decided to take the plunge, hoping this would bring you closer.

“I was thinking,” he began, choosing his words carefully, “maybe… you could design my next tattoo? I mean, if you’re up for it. I’d love to have something of yours.”

You looked up at him, eyes wide with surprise. “You… you want me to design something for you?”

“Yeah,” Jesse said, his tone earnest. “Only if you’re comfortable with it, of course. I just thought it could be something we do together.”

You took a moment to process his request, your fingers idly tracing the pattern of the tattoo again as you considered it. Finally, you nodded, a small but genuine smile on your lips. “I’d like that, Jesse. I’d really like that.”

Relief and excitement washed over him. “Great! We can start whenever you’re ready. No rush.”

You nodded again, a bit more confident now. “Maybe… tomorrow? We can meet here, and I can show you some ideas.”

“Sounds perfect,” Jesse replied, his heart swelling with affection. He’d taken a step closer to you, not just by asking for your artistic help, but by showing you that he valued you—your creativity, your thoughts, and your presence in his life.

As the two of you sat there, chatting softly about possible designs, Jesse couldn’t help but feel that this was the beginning of something special. And as you began to open up, sharing more about your art and your ideas, he knew that whatever this was, it was worth every moment of patience and understanding.

[playlamb]

okay here is big text about experience with ex yay

Its ex made me feel so horrible about everything it did and felt naturally from being developmentally/disabled and living in isolation. It likes studying facial features to draw them. When it liked a person it would get very excited but not for some whatever bpd reason it just was disabled and isolated so its excitement was expressed in way that was ‘too much’ or seen as it idealizing people. It also likes photography; it used to take photos of its ex that she’d share with it and study her features and draw her, she had very interesting face to was very fun to learn. And it would also edit her pictures because it just likes photography editing portraits and drawing. Of course this is something it was going to do, but one day she said ‘I wouldn’t sit around all day editing photos’. It doesn’t work because disabled and doesn’t drive or have friends. This is just something it liked to do with its time. She would always let something like that slip out whenever she was mad at me. She made me feel bad for being disabled and kept pushing for me to suppress those needs. Whenever it asked for anything like clear communication she would get angry with it and say something cruel. ‘that’s just how humans talk’.

She violently lovebombed me and I chose to trust her. Then she completely abandoned me and it was confused why it wasn’t being given everything she promised it. Nobody knows what she did to it. Everyone thinks she did nothing wrong and that it was just crazy. But she made it crazy. She would ignore every one of its attempts to work together to meet its needs because after the lovebombing it became dependent on her, which is the circumstance she created. She insisted on it. And it let it all happen because it decided it wanted to be vulnerable and finally trust a person and accept their love. When accepting (thing it perceived as) her love had the inevitable effect of making all its trauma feelings surface (a lot of it dormant for ten years), which it said ‘this might happen’ and she said ‘I am willing eager and ready to do whatever must be done I love you and that will not change etc the most romantic fantasy of security care and love it has ever heard’. When it happened she didn’t do anything. She was disgusted and left it drowning and to get worse and worse and it’s begging to work on things got ignored until she got sick of it not getting better and ghosted it in the middle of it getting top surgery. And blamed it and yelled at it the whole way. Until the very end. And she believed her own lie. And told the new partners—which she acquired in the time she was ghosting me—that I was crazy and could not be reasoned with and they supported her. She got 3 new partners whose names she put in her blog description right next to my name. While she was ghosting me. My name was still there. “My partners:”

We would talk about how important it was that it was trusting her and she would say how scared she was to hurt it and let it down. She understood its vulnerability.

She never grasped that she was lying because she was never willing to introspect. She hated it. Aggressively. Like..defensive. That is word. She was very defensive about ever being suggested to actually work through feelings. She used to blame it on not having estrogen. She was very depressed. It understood that, it put a lot of stress on her that she couldn’t handle. But she was irresponsible and did not work on herself in any way, she allowed herself to be cruel to it and to do what she did. Because it was easy. She was not willing to stand up to her impulses in Any way. She hated being suggested to. Like it was wrong. That’s the level she was at with capacity for introspection.

•

it is interesting to it that she has no idea of lamb’s real nature. She did not have the capacity to comprehend, or even give herself the chance to understand, the way it functions anyways. She would have gotten so defensive about it lol. and made it about how it is being bad to her. She was always very defensive. It thinks word narcissist is good fit for her. she used to say suspected it was. <-that is not bad btw. Nobody innately ‘evil’. There is no ‘evil disorder’.

But her never knowing lamb’s nature means she does not know that it was not attached to her in the way she might think it was. It was very easy to let her ghost it all those months. It felt nothing when it happened. What stayed with it was not her but the injustice of the harm. It doesn’t care about her. It wants distantly for her to be well, because wants that for everyone, it can even be very passionate about that- but it has no attachment or feelings towards her. It never did, but didn’t know that. lot of masking involved in its happiness with her. It cares, cared about her and trying to maintain healthy relationship, it just does not experience that caring the way most do.

[altschmerzes]

You’re such an amazing writer, I love how well you weave long drawn out character thoughts or observations with dialogue it’s so seemless. I feel like when I try to do that it gets so clunky and hard to read

Do you have any training? Because your stuff reads like a professional

And tips or recommendations? Ie books you’ve learnt from etc etc

Thank you 🙏

ahhhh gosh thank you so much!! i'm so glad you think so. that's something i've really had to work on balancing tbh - the long introspective parts with the dialogue. i can get distracted with the narrative and forget that nobody's spoken in a while and have to go back and fix it lmao. i wouldn't say i have any training! i took a creative writing course in university but it was a very surface level 101 class for one term and we didn't really dig into much. i think it's just time, probably, time and effort doubling down on what i think works for me and what doesn't. i've been writing and posting fic online for... fourteen years? going on fifteen? i was very young when i started, lmao, i think i was twelve, and i'm about twenty-six and a half now, and i've made a lot of progress since then.

a lot of how i handle it now is considering context!! i skim a scene and my notes/draft for it and i try to see if it feels like it passes too quick, or if it misses the point i'm trying to drive home in the mind/heart of the character whose point of view i'm in. if it does, i go back over and try and beef up the narration/introspection. if it feels like it lingers too much or isn't getting to the point quick enough or it just feels like a boring section, i try and clip from dialogue to dialogue faster. if i want it to feel disorienting or detached, i'll keep the paragraphs shorter. if i want the pov character to feel like they're spacing out or dissociating or caught up in their own feelings even if they aren't expressing them, i'll spend longer in their head. if you feel like it's getting clunky, take a step back. look at the clunky piece and go why? does it feel clunky because it's repetitive? is the dialogue not anchored to the internal thought enough when it should be? is it moving too much from thought to thought without spending time on what those thoughts mean, how they feel? those kind of questions can help you get to what needs fixing!

ultimately, it's mostly practice, like most things with writing, i think. take notice of what you like and what you don't like, how you think it fits together. i think in terms of books i've read that made me want to write more, my most recent picks would be the last unicorn by peter s beagle and the locked tomb series by tamsin muir - though tlt is like... probably not what i'd go to for a standard balancing of dialogue and introspection. those books are very stylistic so if that is not the specific style you're going for, it could be difficult to take cues from. in terms of just flat out good, mesmerizing writing, though? yeah. hot damn. highly recommend. and the last unicorn is some of the just, straight up best writing i've ever read.

this is seriously so flattering thank you so much <3 i'm beyond thrilled to hear anyone might like my writing enough to ask for advice from me!

[thesagedahlia]

♊️ Capricorn SZN/ Polarity Reading ♊️

*DISCLAIMER: Capricorn SZN for Gemini (sun, moon, rising, venus, mars, and mercury). ‘Polarity’ refers to the duality that exists within us - masculine (yang) energy and feminine (yin) energy. We all masc. and femme. energy that we operate through daily, so balance is imperative for personal well-being. Pronouns are used to identify ENERGY not GENDER, as this is not a gender specific reading. Read as you see fit, take what resonates, leave everything else. 🩶*

🩷Feminine🩷

she is deciding to remove herself from situations where she gave her power away too much to selfish people. It may be a little bit easier said than done because she may find herself feeling dissatisfied after either a dating cycle or a casual relationship that wasn’t that deep. For someone she may be holding on to the hurt of the past rather than moving on. she may have had a lot of stock/investments in a connection and this could have been a major soul connection (soulmate/twin flame; if you identify with these labels), but she may have lost some of herself in the relationship. she may have felt the urge to release this burden of the past and being introspective about her happiness. she may be going within at this time to discern reality from illusion when it comes to the solid connections in her life. For someone she may be making a choice between suitors that want to pursue her romantically, and one person sticks out from the rest. this may be feeling too good to be true though because this feels like a risk to choose them. for someone else she is feeling discontent with the people who want to pursue her and she is wanting to go back to a specific connection with someone she misses, for someone specific this could be an ex. she may even be lying to herself or others about this person, when in reality she wants to move toward them and mend the bond they once shared. she should use discernment however because the urge to return to this connection may speak more to herself and the lessons she learned from it and still may need to learn. she is weighing out the pros and cons of reaching out, but someone may need to close out a cycle for good to avoid disappointment.

💙Masculine💙

he may be feeling like he invested time in the wrong things/people. he may be starting to realize that vying for too many options leads to disappointment. this usually can result in committing to too much and having a faulty foundation destroyed, for someone this can relate to surface level relationships that he doesn’t intend on having depth or longevity in. He is analyzing some behaviors that he has when it comes to his connections and romantic relationships, for someone he may find it challenging to open up emotionally. this may have led to loneliness due to the inability to face his fears of being vulnerable. the truth is, he may be repressing emotions due to baggage of the past. for someone, he could even be dealing with imposter syndrome, and this could be holding him back in his connections. for someone else, he could be noticing that he engages in self-destructive behaviors for selfish reasons/ulterior motives. he has been overanalyzing a path that he has been pressured to take for a while, and this could be in regards to a specific connection/multiple connections that he is needing to have compassion for in his life and find value in. he may even be using stories/past experiences to explain away his deceptive behaviors/dishonesty. he is realizing that these certain strategies in love can translate as deception, manipulation, and even betrayal. there is a cycle that has ended for him that he is wanting to revive, and this could be a connection that brings him emotional fulfillment. he is needing to reflect on his emotional unavailability/lack of vulnerability/commitment issuesat this time. he is needing to really go within and rely on his intuition at this time and realizing the importance of understanding that all duality needs balance, even in his connections. this is a warning to him; if he stays stuck in his ways, he will be less likely to see through to the right path he’s meant to take.

🩷Signs🩷

Sun, Leo ♌️ , 5th House

Uranus (Aquarius ♒️)

Aries ♈️

Scorpio ♏️

444

777

💙Signs💙

7th House (Venus, Libra ♎️)

Cancer ♋️

10th House (Saturn, Capricorn ♑️)

Square (challenges, tension, pressure)

North Node

Conjunction (merging, combination, enhances)

solar plexus + sacral chakras

[weeb-polls-with-pip]

Autistic Anime Girls Group 2 Round 5 Match 2

SUBMISSION PROPAGANDA:

Ahiru -

"She's just like me for real! A lot of Duck's story is about accepting herself for who she really is instead of pretending to be a normal human girl like everyone else, which makes me feel so comfy inside. Also that one person in the notes who said that the magical girl genre has a lot of autistic girlies? So true. She's one of them! I love her so much, she's awkward and genuine and so very lovely and I've been looking up to her since I was a little baby because again… She's just like me for real. Also I feel like this gif makes good propaganda because mood."

Marcille -

"Dungeon Meshi is a manga about autism that just so happens to also have monsters and cooking.

On a surface level, Marcille seems like the most 'normal' one in the main group, she's often playing the straight man role in jokes and objects to their crazier plans. But its all just masking yall. She is a very introspective and anxious person, she spends a lot of time silently worrying about things like mortality and social rules. So whenever she's freaking out about people cooking monsters, she doesn't actually have any personal objections to it, she's just watching people break the rules she has fixated on and is unsure what to do about it. Likewise, she fell in love with her girlfriend after watching her openly being a weirdo who scampers around in the wilderness to look for cool bugs.

And yet, for all of her worrying about fitting in, she never quite manages it. At the wizard school she was seen as a weirdo half-elf who does unusual experiments and gets too excited. Over the course of the manga, she travels in an adventuring party with a few other openly autistic people (and a chronically divorced hobbit), and she slowly opens up to them over time and becomes more okay with the idea of coming across as weird.

A vote for Marcille Donato is a vote for your local weirdo autistic transbian who fails to fit in."

[parachutingkitten]

Okay, this has been bothering me, and I'm gonna go into it, cuz I feel like being mad that the fandom didn't get better is friggin valid, so imma get negative here at some serious missed potential, if that's not your jam, 100% get it, please scroll past.

We have a season with 20 episodes, each of which are 20 minutes long. That is an unprecedented amount of time for a ninjago season- I would argue maybe too much time, but that's not what we're getting into here. Even just the first half is the length of your standard ninjago season back in the day. There is no excuse for not taking your time with ideas that deserve time. You've got time. You've got too much time.

If you're gonna do a mystical mind prison that traps you in your worst fears, you gotta do it! You can't do this wimpy half commit thing you're doing here. What is this cop out that's like three minutes long? This is a top tier trope! Loads of stories do this- for a good reason, it's a great way to get lots of new insight into your characters, not to mention have fun with environments, hypotheticals, bend logic, and do some creative filmmaking. And here you are, inventing a whole weird fictional animal to facilitate your nightmare state, and it legitimately takes up so little screen time that it hurts! What? Did you not have enough to say about your characters to fill out a full subplot? You thinking that surface level about things? Or was the basketball tournament fake out with the dragons so important to the story that you couldn't cut it out for some character introspection?

It's so short and pointless, it doesn't functionally do anything except tell us very directly "Here's what this character fears, and will have to get past this season!" No looking into why or making some progress/losing progress on the issue in the dream state. We don't even get to see everyone's visions, let alone see any interconnectivity between them. It's just such a waste of a classically exciting set up. And why on earth would you place this concept at the beginning of the season? Put it at the turning point man! That's what this scenario is made for! Literalizing characters overcoming mental challenges so that it's interesting to watch! Using the nightmare dream sphere for exposition in the most boring possible version of the trope is just dumbfounding.

I mean seriously? The black void? That's all you've got? You gonna go the Cars 2 route and set our supposedly deep nightmare sequence in a black void? No symbolism to the void even? No distorting of visuals within the void? Nothing? Can you get any more basic? Did you really put that little creativity into this? Like, the whole point of the nightmare dreamscape is to get creative! So much symbolism and messaging that you can easily tie into things! the possibilities are literally endless! But yeah, I guess Arin running in place is pretty meaningful too, I'm sure it took you a while to come up with something so profound.

There's a reason this story beat usually makes up at least half the plot of any given episode it's in! There's so much room to explore. The potential for crosscutting between nightmares is so high, drawing parallels between characters. Maybe they're all interconnected, and the mentally strongest of the team breaks free to help the others in their nightmares. Maybe it's a revelation point for the rest of the team as they see a dark past of another character they didn't know about. Or maybe it's just the audience who gets new insight into a sheltered corner of a character's mind, or a way to reveal to them a dark secret someone is hiding. You can also have fun subverting expectations, maybe one of the nightmares is just objectively pretty funny. And, the best thing about any dream environment you're creating, you can have the characters get involved in insanely creative fights and action scenes where they literally beat up their mental roadblocks with cool looking and symbolically important powers or tools.

Like, I know the fandom is losing their mind over this scene because 'omg Nya's gonna be so sad cuz of the memory loss(that hasn't even been revealed in narrative yet, so the irony doesn't even really work)' but I just need you to understand that the full fledged angst, character growth, and introspection y'all are speculating could have theoretically happened in Kai's plot is what we could have had for everyone. For a full episode. Like it deserved to be. And it would have been really cool, and really satisfying, and beautifully and symbolically stunning, because countless other people have done it, it's honestly not too difficult. Stop freaking out like they did a good job with this- they didn't do a good job with this. They couldn't even bother to give everyone a vision, they just gave up on the concept halfway through.

Not to mention how accessible and valuable this type of storytelling is to kids! Literalizing some of the big abstract issues these characters are supposedly battling this season would be a great way to get kids to grasp these ideas, but instead it's literally like two and a half minutes of slightly ominous stuff to bate us before we move on.

Stop teasing us with interesting stuff and then not actually following through! This is not how you do storytelling!

[scavengerssuccotash]

What does aftercare look like for Clint and Nat?

Depends on what kind of aftercare you’re looking for, my dear.

Was it a rough mission that left their bodies sore and aching?

If that’s the case they soothe each other’s sore muscles away in a variety of ways. For Natasha the bulk of her sore muscles rests in her thighs and legs. Clint with usually draw her a nice hot bath with some soaking salts (lavender scented) and let her decompress. Sometimes he’ll join her, especially if his back is hurting, but most times he just lets her rest in the bath and play errand boy if she needs something. Afterwards, Natasha will curl up with him on the couch with her feet in his lap so he can rub them. And oh god! His hands? If Natasha were religious his hands is the closest thing to making her believe in a god. About the time he works his way up her calves, she’s limp against the arm of the couch and almost asleep.

Clint on the other hand carries most of his stress in his shoulders and arms. (Clint often jokes that if you put the two of them together, her legs and his upper body, they could qualify for a retirement community by the state of their joints alone.) With that said, baths hardly touch the ache in his shoulders. Showers are his go-to, along with icy-hot and Natasha’s own bone melting masseuse skills. Repetition with the draw weight he’s got might’ve given him great definition but it also aged his rotator cuffs and shoulder blade ten years. After a long hot shower, you can find him sitting on the floor between Natasha’s legs with an ice pack on each shoulder as she rubs his neck.

Or are you looking for the tumble between the sheets kind of aftercare?

In which case this came to them with much more difficulty than it did with the other kind. Particularly for Natasha. Any wonder why? The first few times they slide between the sheets, Natasha would jump out of bed, quickly throw on her clothes and leave while Clint just laid in bed still coming down from his post coital high, dazed and ultimately confused. In hindsight, Natasha’s sudden departure after taught Clint a lot about himself. Namely: how much he really did like and need the after romp cuddling. Be it some internalized misogyny, or a lack of self introspection Clint had just assumed that is what you did with your partner, so…he did it and didn’t look into it any deeper than the surface level. Turns out it just took Natasha leaving him high and dry (wet?) for him to realize that, “actually no, I think I like the cuddling!?”

Conversely Natasha dipped because she had wanted to stay, which was in of itself a terrifying epiphany to have after what she’ll testify to is the best sex ever. It was all too much too fast and god she can’t do this?! Can she? She wants to, but…

In the end it took three months, a couple of drunken blurt out your feelings kind of nights, and a close call in Mumbai for them to get on the same page.

For Clint to say, “I need to a place to land after soaring that high, Nat. I drop like a fucking stone, and it’s not a good feeling!”

And for Nat to say, “I don’t know what to do with all this, I wasn’t trained on what to do if I actually fell!”

“No one gets a manual, Tasha. You just do what feels right.”

“Us. That feels right.”

Natasha relaxes into their after sex cuddle sessions a little bit better after this. She still leaves after, only spending the nights when they drink and she doesn’t want to drive or bother with a taxi or public transport, but she stops leaving right away. She lingers long enough for Clint to be on the precipice of sleep, before slipping out of bed. Which is fine by Clint, he’s admittedly a bit of a bed hog.

About a year and two months into their relationship, the aftercare is superb. Clint gets his cuddles, and Natasha, well Natasha gets breakfast in bed now. And sometimes, when Clint’s feeling a bit cheeky he will wake her up in the most delicious of ways.

Thanks for asking, hope you enjoy! 🥰