#this song sends me spiraling fr | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

strniohoeee · 10 months ago

Note

matt eating reader out whenever he's bored

Lost

Pairing: Matt Sturniolo X Female Reader

Synopsis: After a boring day with Matt, the reader and him decide to have some fun….📞

Warnings⚠️: SMUTTTTT. Matt eating that coochie🤭. Matt being a munch fr fr😋

Song for the imagine: Planez- Jeremih, J. Cole

⚠️This is an 18+ imagine so minors do not interact, or do??⚠️

Munch

Verb

Someone who’s only use is eating pussy without getting anything in return.

My jaw was hung open so wide it was beginning to ache. The back of my head roughly rubbing against the sheets. Thank god for his silk sheets or my hair would be a knotted mess right now.

My right hand interlocked with Matt’s left hand while my left hand was tugging at the roots of his hair. My neck stretched back as pants left my mouth and tears brimmed my eyes.

My heels digging into his mattress so hard the soles of my feet were white. My toes curled inching closer to giving myself a cramp.

My back arching off the bed occasionally as my nipples stood against the fabric of my tank top burning to be touched.

The vibrations of Matt’s hums send shockwaves through my body, his nose occasionally bumping into my clit. His stubble burning my thighs everytime my thighs clamped around his head

Flashback

I was currently laying in Matt’s bed after showering and simply relaxing while reading my book. He has gone to shower and I decided to wait for him

Today was such a boring day, just sitting in his house watching movies and playing Fortnite. Matt was so bored he decided to take a second shower of the day….he was a bit weird.

I laid on my back with my legs propped up and bent, not paying any mind to my position as I flipped to the next page.

Matt came back into the room and shut the door behind him

“It’s not lady like to sit with your legs up dear” he said stalking over to me

I shut the book and immediately put my legs down

“Matt” I said blushing and rolling my eyes

“Some might get the wrong….idea” he said whispering and looking down at me

“Oh might they” I said placing the book on his nightstand

“They might think it’s an invitation” he said kneeling onto the bed

I slowly lifted my legs back up and propped them open a bit more

“Oh man that would suck” I said playfully looking around

Matt laid down next to me and looked at me with lazy eyes ghosting his hand over my thigh

“Will my pretty girl let me eat her out” he asked looking at me through his lashes

“I’m not sure your brothers are home” I said looking at him

“They’re in nick's room and plus I’m bored and this will help pass the time” he said running his fingers up to my knee

“Mmm okay” I said licking my lips

Matt began to kiss me, rubbing his hands up my stomach and to my breast squeezing them as I let out a low moan

His lips trailing down to my neck as he left small pecks all the way down to my collar bone.

“You just have to be quiet, can you do that for me?” He asked looking at me

“Yes” I whispered back

“Good girl” he said winking

He got up and walked to the end of the bed motioning me over with his finger. I slid down towards him and laid propped up with my feet on his torso…teasing him

He grabbed my left leg and began to kiss from my ankle down to my inner thighs before repeating it on the right side.

I closed my legs as he got down on his knees in front of me

Rubbing his hands up my shins

“Open up for me dear” he said licking his lips

His looks and his words alone sent me spiraling, and I complied

Opening my legs for him, his hands running up the sides of my torso

He ran his hands down my thighs ghosting his fingers over my underwear.

His lips kissing my stomach and my thighs

“Pleas Matt I need more” I whined out

“I know baby” he said looking at me

Placing his lips on my clothed pussy kissing and licking as my mouth fell open

“Fuck” I moaned out

“Remember quiet” he said shushing me

“I’m sorry” I said looking down at him

He hooked his fingers into my waistband and began to slide my underwear off. The cold air hit my cunt as I shivered.

“So pretty” he said tossing my underwear behind him

He kissed my hip bones and then the top of my pussy slowly tracing his mouth down to my clit

Spitting gently before attaching his mouth to my clit

Merry hand hooking into his hair as my right hand interlocked with his left hand

“Mattttt” I moaned out lowly

His tongue swirling around my clit as he looked up at me through his lashes. Bringing his tongue down through my folds and lapping at me like a starved man.

Flashback over

I was nearing my orgasm as his tongue worked magic on me. His pointed nose bumping into my clit as he slurped against me.

Flattening his tongue against me as he licked back up to my clit. Sucking and letting go with a pop

“MATT” I moaned out loudly

Looking down at him

“I said you have to stay quiet” he replied releasing his mouth from me

Lifting up to come up to me, my arousal and his spit coating his mouth and chin. Making my pussy clench around nothing

Attaching his lips to mine as our tongues fought for dominance. Matt was such a slut when it came to making out. Nothing my tongue and spit. It was messy and it was hot…. Fuck

“I’m sorry baby but I have to do this” he said after pulling away

He lifted my tank top up and put the bunched fabric in my mouth. Running his hands over my breasts as he brought his head down to suck on my breasts

“Now you can stay quiet” he said going back down to my pussy

Attaching his mouth to my clit as his hands hooked under my knees and pushed my thighs back and open.

Swirling his tongue against my clit as I bit down on my shirt letting my heavy breathing take over me.

Groaning and throwing my head back as I bit down hard on my shirt.

“Come on baby I know you’re close” he said against me

Causing my back to arch and my thighs to squeeze shut

Violently sucking on my clit as I began to shake against him

My orgasm washed over me as my thighs began to shake and I moaned against the fabric in my mouth. Thrashing against the bed as Matt held me down to continue lapping at me.

Groans came out of me as I came all over his mouth and my body shuddered against the bed.

Helping me ride out my high before pulling away from me and standing up.

Matt pulled the shirt from my mouth as I laid there breathing heavily with my eyes shut.

“You okay there baby” he asked me rubbing my cheek

“Yeah…very okay” I said opening my eyes and smiling at him

“Here lets get you a new shirt” he said helping me up and lifting my tank top off of me

Using my shirt to wipe his mouth and chin before tossing it in his laundry and bringing me one of my other shirts and new pair of underwear

I got dressed and laid on the bed, Matt coming over and snuggling into me

“Now I’m not bored anymore” he said kissing my cheek and pulling me close to him

“Me neither” I said giggling

We laid there in the dimly lit room talking as he rubbed his hands through my hair and down my back. Eventually we dozed off….

The End

IDK why I struggle with ending a story this is badddd, but hope you enjoyed and the rest of the stories will be out tomorrow smoochies🥹🖤🖤

-J💅🏽

#matt sturniolo x reader smut #matthew sturniolo smut #matt sturniolo smut #matthew sturniolo x reader smut #smut #sturniolo triplet smut

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mrkeatingsblazer · 7 months ago

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Rick should make a pjo universe short story book.

Like pair up random characters with a member of the Seven and have them go on stupid quests and just do teenage things.

My favourite one I’ve thought of is Will and Leo going on a road trip to Austin to see Naomi preform. Will was gonna take Nico but Leo caught whiff of the fact he had two tickets and basically begged to go (I headcanon Leo LOVES country music, Naomi Solaces no.1 stan fr). Leo ends up building a fucking truck and is like “ROADTRIP❗️” Will is just like “huh” because he was low-key either gonna get Nico to shadow travel them or cash in his son of Apollo privileges and get him to drive them via the sun chariot.

The whole thing would just be a country filled shitshow and it would be amazing. They’d find themselves in a dance hall, Leo would get flung around on a mechanical bull and Will starts line dancing (of course they found themselves in a thrift shop before this after somehow destroying their clothes and they would buy cowboy boots and hats). A funny little moment would happen of a girl hitting on Will and he’s like “I have a boyfriend!!” And Leo just appears after winning the bull riding record and jumps into a hug with Will and the girl is just like “Awh sorry I didn’t know! You two are such a cute couple” and walks away leaving them flabbergasted.

They’d obviously have to fight a few monsters and maybe an enemy of one of there fathers(I can’t think of one that hasn’t already been defeated, maybe Geryon?!?). Both of them would be running around losing their shit bc neither of them are big fighters but Leo goes into his belt and starts tinkering and he just yells to Will who’s trying to hold the enemy back “Apollo kids have a good shot right” and Will’s like “Yeah but I’m not the best a-“ and Leo just throws something at him and says “shoot this!!!” And will just looks down and he’s holding a fucking gun that has celestial bronze bullets and he just blindly shoots and defeats the monster on his first shot leading him to realise that he has brilliant aim with a gun.This would send him spiralling for a page bc what do you mean he has good aim?!? He’s been horrendous with a bow all these years and all he needed was a gun to activate that power?!?

They would end up at the concert and have a blast (Leo 100% starts crying, Naomi is his Beyoncé) but Naomi would finish a song and invite a special guess out and out comes fucking Apollo. They would sing a duet (islands in the stream or smth idfk) and Will is just shocked. I feel like he would get a little sad and Leo’s just like “bruh you good?” through his own tears and Will just opens up and is like “ they seem so happy together, I wish I grew up with both of them” and Leo just hugs him as they watch Apollo and Naomi sing their hearts out on stage.

Sorry the Will and Leo Texas solidarity/bromance gets to me fr.

But like seriously this would be such a great idea!! Imagine Frank and Clarisse or Piper and Nico going on a random adventure together. It would be so chaotic.

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theewokingdead · 1 year ago

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Hate Me - Francisco "Catfish" Morales x f!Reader

Pairing: Francisco “Catfish” Morales x f!Reader POV: Second ("You") Summary: Frankie loses his pilot’s license after failing a drug test and begs you to make it easy for him to leave. Inspired by the song “Hate Me” by Blue October. Set several months before the events of the Triple Frontier movie. Rating: Mature Word Count: 5.1k Content: Hurt/Comfort. Mentions of previous drug use and relapse. Reader finds out she’s pregnant. Allusions to breastfeeding. Dad!Frankie. A/N: This has been floating around in my head for a while, and I was FINALLY able to get it down. Enjoy the emotional damage and please don’t hate me.

Masterlist

Hey, Frankie, it’s me, and it’s one thirty-seven on Monday afternoon. I’m just sitting in my car and thought I should call you to see how you are doing. I know you’ve been under a lot of pressure lately and I just wanted to make sure that you’re okay, and, well... I just wanted to make sure everything’s okay. I, uh… I was really hoping you’d pick up. I just need to hear your voice, to hear you say that everything will be okay. Everything is okay. You know I love you. Hope to hear from you. Bye.

Frankie’s knuckles are white as he grips the steering wheel, his jaw tight. His gaze is fixed on the road ahead, his mind a void of nothingness, purposefully pushing away any thoughts that will no doubt send him spiraling into despair. He pulls into the driveway, feeling numb and empty. After parking the truck, he slowly makes his way up to the front door of his house, mindlessly going through the motions of unlocking the door and entering.

It’s quiet inside, an eerie silence that makes him feel alone. He closes the door behind him and leans against it, never taking off his shoes. In a sense, he feels safer here, as if he can avoid facing what has happened outside these walls for just a little bit longer.

He trudges to the bedroom where he throws his keys on the bedside table. He removes his wallet and phone from his pocket, carefully setting them down. The movement causes the screen of his phone to come to life, informing him of a call he hadn’t heard come through. Frankie picks up the device and sees a voicemail from you.

Immediately, the feelings he so desperately wanted to bury start to come through. His pride burns within him, and he’s reminded of what a failure he is, how useless he is. He’s afraid to hear what you have to say, but he knows he can’t ignore the sound of your voice for long. With a heavy breath, he presses the play button, listening as you express your concern for him and your love. His heart sinks.

The moment the voicemail ends, Frankie tosses his phone and falls to the edge of the bed. Dropping his elbows to his thighs, he lifts his hands and buries his face in them. He pushes just hard enough for his eyes to ache, a welcome pain. The sensation helps, at least for a moment, distracting the voices in his head — the ones telling him he isn’t good enough, that you deserve so much better than this.

He never wanted you to find out about any of it - the horrors he saw while fighting someone else’s war, the nightmares that wake him sweating and screaming and draining his spirit, the cocaine he snorts, and the alcohol he downs to dull the pain. He never wanted you to be a part of the battle he fights in his mind. But despite his best efforts to keep you away, you could see something was wrong, and eventually, he dropped his walls and allowed you inside. He resented it but knew it was for the best, you wanting nothing more than to help him find his way back to mental peace.

He swore he’d never touch coke again, and he stayed true to his word for several months…until he didn’t. It was just one line, a harmless indulgence he told himself. But one turned into two, and two turned into three until he couldn’t remember how many he had snorted. The high was fleeting, barely lasting long enough to be worth the trouble, and yet he kept coming back to it.

Frankie knew he was spiraling out of control again. He didn’t know how to talk to you about it, how to explain the way his mind has been betraying him. He thought he could get it under control on his own this time, that maybe he wasn’t in too deep to pull himself out. Now, it’s too late.

All it took was one misstep and now there’s no hiding it. This morning, the results of a random drug test at work came back positive, sealing his fate in an instant. He had gambled with his future and lost. Now, he is left with nothing. No pilot’s license, no work, no chance of a steady reasonable income to support you.

Frankie feels a deep shame for not being able to hold it together. You had done all that you could to help him and had trusted him to stay clean, but he failed you and broke your trust. He doesn’t know how to face you, how to look you in the eyes and tell you he had screwed up. His heart aches as he thinks of the disappointment he will see in your eyes. He can’t put you through this…not again.

I can’t stay here.

Frankie’s heart breaks at the thought of letting go, but he has no choice - reality is stronger than his feelings for you. Staying will only bring more pain. You deserve more than he can offer, and though you’ve started to pull away from him lately, you’ll never willingly let him go. His only option is to force you to leave him behind by being the one to leave first - to go somewhere so far away that he’ll never be able to cross your mind again.

He grabs a duffle bag and throws random belongings into it with reckless abandon, not stopping until he hears his name being uttered in a trembling voice. He pauses, frozen - for a second he can't tell if it's real or just an illusion of his own making. But when he hears it again, this time louder and more insistent, he knows it’s no dream. This is real, and all he can do is pray that finding out this way will make you hate him enough to be able to let him go.

This can’t be happening.

Tears drip down your face, hands clutching the steering wheel as you will yourself to as you try to make sense of the news. You didn’t believe it when you first got a positive test two weeks ago, and you still don’t want to believe it despite the doctor’s confirmation. Your heart feels like it’s breaking, a thousand shards of emotions piercing your soul.

You and Frankie have talked about your future together, and you’ve both expressed the desire to want kids one day. But this is not how it’s supposed to happen. The timing feels wrong. Frankie has only been clean for three months, and you know he still struggles with overcoming the addiction. He still needs to focus on himself. What will this do to him? And how can you take away from his life when he is only just getting it back?

Taking a deep breath, you wipe away the tears from your eyes with the back of your hand. Then, you reach for your phone and dial his number. You don’t know what you’re going to say, only that you need to hear his voice. With every ring, your heart beats faster, wondering if this is the ring when he’ll finally pick up.

This is stupid, you think, the rings vibrating in your ear. You never should’ve called him. You can’t tell him something like this over the phone. He deserves to hear it in person. However, right now, the need to hear his voice far outweighs any common sense.

The call goes to voicemail, and you take another deep breath, trying to steady your voice to leave a message. When he sees a missed call from you, he’ll worry that something’s wrong without any reassurance that everything’s okay.

“Hey, Frankie, it’s me, and it’s”-you quickly glance at the clock on your dash-“one thirty-seven on Monday afternoon. I’m just sitting in my car and thought I should call you to see how you are doing. I know you’ve been under a lot of pressure lately and I just wanted to make sure that you’re okay, and, well... I just wanted to make sure everything’s okay. I, uh… I was really hoping you’d pick up. I just need to hear your voice, to hear you say that everything will be okay.”

You cringe, knowing he’ll think something is wrong and he’ll spiral. “Everything is okay,” you immediately reassure him. “You know I love you. Hope to hear from you. Bye.”

After hanging up and tossing your phone on the passenger seat, you sigh loudly, wondering if calling him was the right choice.

Stupid, stupid, stupid.

You turn on the ignition and begin to drive. Frankie won’t be home from work for several hours, hopefully giving you some time to process the news and figure out a proper way to tell him.

When you pull into the driveway, you see his truck parked in its usual spot. Immediately, you’re confused. He shouldn’t be home.

Taking a deep breath, you brace yourself for the worst as you enter the house. The silence is suffocating, and you can feel the tension in the air. You make your way into the living room, calling out his name, but there is no answer. Then you hear it – a sound coming from the bedroom.

You gently push the door open and find him standing beside the bed, a duffle bag sitting on the mattress in front of him as he stuffs things inside. It doesn’t seem like he’s packing for a short trip.

“Frankie?” Your voice is weak and filled with confusion.

He stops in place as if he had been caught in some sort of criminal act. He doesn’t move, doesn’t say a word - like he’s frozen in time. Seconds, minutes, hours pass – you can’t be sure which. Your mind races, filled with insecurities as you realize he must be leaving – leaving you. Did he get your message? Does he somehow know? Maybe he found one of your tests in the trashcan. Maybe the doctor accidentally called him. Either way, he must know, and now, instead of accepting the responsibility of being a father, he’s running.

“Frankie!” you demand, your voice insistent. “Look at me.”

Frankie turns his head, his soft brown eyes meeting your own. You can see the pain etched on his face, the turmoil in his eyes. You wonder what could make him want to leave, to run away from you and your future together.

“Are you leaving me?” you question, needing to hear him say it.

His head turns slightly, eyes falling to the floor, and it’s all the confirmation you need.

Your heart shatters into a million pieces, the weight of the news and his sudden need to leave overwhelming you. You had thought that he would stay, that he would fight for you and your future together. But this… this is just too much. You struggle to hold back the tears threatening to spill over, but you can’t help it. Before you know it, you’re on the floor, sobbing hysterically.

Concerned, Frankie flies across the room and drops to the floor. He takes your hands in his and looks into your eyes, begging you to yell at him, to tell him how much you hate him at this moment.

“Frankie, please,” you sob. “I need you. I can’t do this without you. Please.”

“Shhh, shhh,” Frankie coos. He takes your face in his calloused hands, and you can feel the warmth of his hand on your cheeks. Gently, he wipes away your tears as fast as they spill. He silently prays to whatever god is listening to take all your pain away, to make you smile and be your usual happy self. He hates seeing you like this, hates that he’s the reason for it even more.

Peace is all he’s ever wanted for you, and instead of giving it to you, he’s only ever taken it away. “Bebita, please. I’m sorry.”

Your sobs slow down after a few moments, and you finally work up the courage to look him in the eye. “How, Frankie?” Your voice breaks as you ask the question in a whisper. He withdraws his hands, clearly ashamed of his actions. “How could you do this to me? To us.”

Frankie rises to his feet, and you sit in silence, waiting for him to say something, anything. “I’m doing this for you,” he finally contends.

You feel anger and confusion welling up inside you. “For me?” you ask. Your lips emit a sound that resembles both a sob and a laugh. “How can abandoning me now, when I need you the most, be for me? After all that I have done for you...” You shake your head in disbelief, the tears rolling down your cheeks. Your heart feels like it is being crushed by a heavy weight.

Suddenly, it’s all starting to make sense – his behavior recently. You pretended you didn’t see it, pretended all the signs didn't point to him using again, but you can’t ignore this damning evidence. You wipe a tear from your face.

“It’s the coke again, isn’t it?” you whisper desperately, looking back at him.

Frankie turns his face away from yours, unable to keep up the charade. The air around him crackles with pain and disappointment as you both realize that he hasn't learned from his mistake, once again succumbing to the lure of the drug that nearly destroyed your relationship in the past. He had promised himself he would never make that same mistake again, but here it is, a smoky reminder of how quickly life could slip away as he traded his future for a momentary high.

“I’m sorry, bebita. I wanted to be a better man for you, one that could take care of you, one that could be happy and clean…but I just couldn’t do it.” His voice cracks as he speaks, and you can see how hard it is for him to admit this truth aloud.

After rising to your feet, you reach out to him in an attempt to comfort him, but he pulls away before you can touch him. His eyes are full of sorrow as he stands up and grabs his bag from the bed.

“I have to get out of here.”

“No,” you insist, grabbing a hold of the bag, refusing to let him leave. “Frankie, you don’t have to do this.”

“We can’t continue like this. My addiction is hurting us both, pulling us into a pit of despair and misery. I know you want out, and I won’t let it destroy you any more than it already has; you deserve so much more than this.”

“What the hell are you talking about?” you question, feeling your blood boil as you let go of the bag and step back. “I am not in a pit of despair or misery, and I’m not trying to get out of anything. What makes you think-” You stop, knowing that you’ve been distant the last few weeks, having chosen to not burden him with your pregnancy until you were certain. He must’ve mistaken it as you pulling away from him because of him, because of his addiction. Suddenly, you soften. “Oh, Francisco,” you coo. “Please. Let me explain. I’m not…I’m not trying to find a way out. I haven’t given up on you, not now, not ever. I love you-”

“That’s the fucking problem!” Frankie exclaims so suddenly, causing you to flinch. “I want you to give up on me. I want you to hate me.”

“Hate you?” you question. “I could never hate you.”

Frankie looks at you with desperation in his eyes, his voice breaking as he speaks. “You have to. Please. You have to hate me - I need you to hate me - so that I can leave and never come back. Hate me for leaving you. Hate me for not being strong enough to walk away from the coke. Hate me for all the things I couldn’t do for you. I don’t care. Just… Please. I’m begging you. Do whatever it takes to hate me so you can finally see what’s good for you.”

“See what’s good for me?” you repeat, not believing he’s saying these things. “I see what’s good for me, Frankie, and it’s you. You are what’s good for me, whether you believe it or not.”

Frankie stares at you with wide eyes, trying to suppress the emotions that are bubbling up inside him. He can’t believe that you still want him, even after everything he’s done. All he can feel is a sense of shame and unworthiness that clouds his judgment.

“I’m not good enough for you,” he whispers, his voice cracking. “I’ll only bring you down.”

“You’re wrong,” you insist. “I love you, Frankie. Let me help you. Please. Tell me what you need me to do.”

Frankie looks at you, his eyes glistening with tears, and you know that he’s struggling with his demons. He collapses onto the edge of the bed. “Make it go away. Please. Make it all fucking go away.” He puts his face in his hands and sobs.

You approach him slowly, wrapping your arms around him. You feel his body tense up before he relaxes into your embrace, his sobs muffled by your shirt as he buries his face into it, his hands fisting the fabric. You hold him tightly, feeling the weight of his addiction and the overwhelming emotions that come with it.

“It’s too much,” he whispers brokenly. “This never-ending cycle of hell.”

“Tell me,” you gently encourage. “Help me understand.”

Frankie lets go and pulls back, giving him enough space to talk. He wipes away tears with the sleeve of his khaki jacket. “Every morning I wake up not knowing if I’m going to stay clean. I try my best to make it through another day without using, but as the hours tick by, I become restless – desperate to silence the screams in my head. I’ve started drinking more just to sleep - replacing one poison with another, I know. I wake hours later, when the drink’s worn off, to my nerves screaming out, so I drag myself to the medicine cabinet for relief – anything to stop the pain. But it’s never enough. And I tell myself that I’ll never do this to myself again, but somewhere inside I know that by the next evening, if by some miracle I don’t use, I’ll just be drunk again.”

When he’s finished, he finally looks up. “I’m too fucking weak.”

You come down to his level and look him square in the eyes. “You are not weak. You are so much stronger than you give yourself credit for. You just need to believe in yourself.”

Frankie looks at you, his eyes filled with hopelessness. “I don’t know if I can.”

“You can,” you say firmly, threading your fingers into his curls. “I believe in you. And I know that you can do this. It’s hard…but think of it like a skill. Something that requires practice. Think of it like… Well, like flying. You remember your first time behind the controls, don’t you?”

Frankie dips his head and then chuckles lowly. “You mean the time I tried to lift a several thousand-pound bucking bull off the ground?”

You chuckle. “Sounds about right. Tell me about it.”

“I’ve told you the story a hundred-”

“Just one more time. Please?” you beg, giving him puppy eyes that you know he can’t resist.

Frankie sighs, his shoulders falling. “I was fucking terrified. I tensed up, trying to remember everything I had learned. I couldn’t even hit the full eight seconds before the instructor snapped the controls and steadied the aircraft.”

“And then?” you goad, remembering how the story goes.

“He let me try again. And the same thing happened,” he replies. “Every time the instructor demonstrated the maneuver, I was certain I was going to nail it, but each time he transferred the controls, the helicopter began bucking wildly around the airfield. No matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t tame the bull. The instructor kept growing more and more frustrated. So was I. He kept telling me to get out of my head and to just fly the aircraft, but what the hell did that mean? I started to question whether I had the ability to fly.”

“Do you remember how long it took you to finally get it?”

“Nine days,” Frankie replies with a nod. “I started to give up after a week. I just didn’t have the energy or mental capacity to fight the helicopter or instruction anymore. Finally, on the ninth day, the instructor told me to take the controls and I just did it. I brought the helicopter about seven feet off the ground. My altitude was steady. I held my heading. I was flying.”

“You were flying.” You reach out and grab his hand, giving him a squeeze. “What was so different about that day, Frankie?”

“I got out of my head,” Frankie admits. “Flying has very little to do with thinking and everything to do with feeling. You have to trust yourself to just feel and respond to the aircraft.”

“What about recovery? You don’t think you need to get out of your head?”

Frankie looks at you, considering your words, a glimmer of hope flashing in his eyes. “Maybe,” he says finally. “Are you saying I need to trust myself more and feel my way through it?”

“Maybe,” you say, smiling at him. “And you don’t have to do it alone. You have me. And we can find you the help you need, the support you need. Together, we can get through this.”

Frankie nods, but his gaze darts away. Suddenly, you can see tears filling his eyes again, and he turns away to hide them.

“What is it?” You can sense there’s more.

“I really fucked up.”

“Frankie-”

“I lost my license,” he confesses before you can say anything more. “I only just found out this morning. I failed a drug test and now I’m grounded for God knows how long. Maybe forever.”

“Oh, Frankie,” you sigh, your heart breaking for him.

“The FAA is going to strip me of everything,” Frankie sighs. “My license, my career-”

“Hey. Stop it,” you insist. “You don’t know that. It’s just a suspension, right?”

Frankie nods.

“So, you’ll go under review. They’ll make you jump through some hoops. Maybe make you seek treatment, which you’re going to do anyway, right? Everything will be okay. You’ll be back in the air before you know it. Until then, we’ll take it day by day. I’ll be here every step of the way to support you. We can do this together.”

Frankie nods once more, his eyes still filled with tears. “Okay,” he says softly. “One day at a time.”

You can feel your resolve strengthening. This is going to be okay… Except there’s still one more thing – something that’s going to change everything.

“I’m sorry I haven’t exactly been here for you lately,” you say. “It wasn’t you; it was me that I was avoiding. I didn’t…” You bite down on your lips before you continue, knowing this is difficult to talk about and deciding which words will help the situation. Facing him square on, you lay it out plainly. “Frankie, I’m pregnant. I didn’t know how to tell you, so I just…didn’t say anything. I was terrified that this would fuck up your sobriety, and, well – in hindsight, that was ridiculous. But the doctor confirmed it today.”

“You’re…” he falls silent. He stares at you, his eyes wide with shock and disbelief. “We’re having a baby?” Frankie’s eyes fill with tears once more, but this time they’re tears of joy.

You nod, feeling a lump form in your throat. “Yeah. And I know it’s not the best timing, which is why I didn’t want to burden you by-”

“Burden me? Baby, you’re having our baby. That’s not a burden, and even if it was, you shouldn’t have to carry it alone. I mean… Wow. You have our baby inside of you? Right now?”

You nod, giggling through your own tears, feeling a sense of relief wash over you. You realize this is what you both need – something to hold onto, something to fight for. And with each other and this baby, you know that you can overcome anything.

“Yeah,” you repeat. Reaching into your pocket, you pull out a tiny black-and-white photo that you’d rolled up for safekeeping. There isn’t much to see except what looks like a tiny gummy bear sitting in a pool of black.

“Dios mío,” Frankie utters under his breath, looking down at the image. “Do you know if it’s-”

“No,” you reply, knowing what he’s going to ask. “It’s too soon to tell. But I got to hear the heartbeat. See all these lines here? It was very strong. Just as a Morales should be.”

Frankie turns and looks at you, taking your hand in his. “I’m going to be there for you,” he assures you. “For both of you. I’m done with all this bullshit. I don’t care how hard it is. Nothing is more important than you and this baby.”

You smile, tears growing in your eyes. “Just promise me one thing.”

“Anything,” Frankie breathes.

“Never let me see you pack this bag again.”

Eight months later…

Your eyes flutter open. Why isn’t the baby crying? Isn’t it time for her to eat? Quickly, you grab your phone. 4:17 am. Fuck, it’s more than an hour past her feeding time.

Moving as quickly as a new mother can, you reach for the newborn nestled inside the Pack-N-Play beside your bed – only, she isn’t there. Looking back at your bed, you see that Frankie is gone as well. The house is quiet, and unless Frankie has magically started lactating – something you’ve wished for only about five hundred times a day since Elena was born – there’s not much he can do to keep a starving newborn from crying.

Why didn’t he wake me?

As you step into the hallway, you notice a light glowing through the cracked door of the nursery.

Quietly, you push the door open and stand in the doorway, watching as Frankie rocks a sleeping Elena, all swaddled up and snoozing on his chest. His hand slowly moves back and forth across her back, his face peaceful and content. Even in the soft light, you can see the lines around his eyes and the deep circles under them.

A wave of emotion washes over you, but you don’t say a word, letting them share a moment together.

When Frankie finally notices your presence, he looks up at you and shoots you a small smile. “I didn’t want to wake you.”

“Probably should’ve,” you whisper in jest, stepping further into the room. “My boobs feel like rocks.”

“I’m sorry,” Frankie says, a hint of a chuckle in his voice. “I know you haven’t been sleeping, so when she started to whine, I whisked her away and made her a bottle before she could wake you. She took to it like a champ.”

You offer a little smile. Breastfeeding has been such an incredibly difficult journey, both mentally and physically exhausting. It took longer than expected for your milk to come in, and you never know if you’re producing enough or if she’s receiving enough. Some days she wants to eat for hours at a time, and other days she wants to stretch her feeds to where you feel like your breasts could explode. Pumping is a job of its own. To make matters worse, it’s all on you; Frankie can only do so much. But formula is expensive, so you’ve been trying to convince yourself that this is the best way.

“I’m sorry if I overstepped,” Frankie says after a long moment of silence, likely thinking you’re upset. He’s been nothing but incredibly supportive of all your decisions.

“No,” you say, shaking your head. “No, don’t apologize. You’re her father. Don’t apologize for bonding with her. Clearly, she likes you.” You smile, but it quickly fades as you cross your arms in front of you. “I’ve actually been thinking that maybe…maybe switching to formula isn’t such a bad idea. I know it’s more money but the toll feeding is taking on me is… Well, it’s a lot.”

Careful not to wake the baby, Frankie rises from the chair and moves to the crib. He shifts her in his arms, then lays her down in her crib ever-so-gently to keep her asleep. He stares for a moment, admiring her sleeping form.

“I know, baby,” Frankie says soothingly. “Don’t worry about the money; we’ll make it work. The only things that matter are that you and her are happy and healthy. And honestly, I’m really excited at the prospect of being able to help out some more.”

You smile once more. “I don’t know what I did to deserve you, Frankie. I couldn’t have asked for a better partner through this.”

Frankie smiles shyly and his eyes turn softer than usual. “I’m the lucky one,” he replies. “If you had told me a year ago that this is where I’d be - happy, clean, holding the most beautiful baby given to me by the most incredible woman - I would’ve told you that you’re crazy. But, here I am. And I couldn’t have done it without you. When I failed that drug test, I thought I lost everything, and I wanted to leave so you could have the chance at finding something better. But when you told me that you were pregnant, I felt so much hope for our future. Now, I understand that life is about these choices, and I have no regrets about the path I chose to ride along. You bring happiness into my life every day, and just knowing that you love me gives me the strength to keep fighting for us.”

“I will always love you, Francisco.” You smile and wrap your arms around him, feeling your heart swell with love. "I love you so much."

“I love you too, baby.”

As usual, the two of you are interrupted - except not by the screaming demands of your adorable little tyrant. Something vibrates on the table beside the rocking chair, garnering your attention.

“Who could that be this late?” you question, seeing the screen of his phone light up for a moment before darkening. Frankie huffs and moves across the room to pick up his cell from where it lays on the little table.

Frankie looks down at the screen, his brows furrowing while his eyes seem to scan a message.

“Frankie?” you question, worry creeping into your voice. You reach for him, feeling his skin as it goes cold. “What is it?”

As he looks at you, you can see his mind running a million miles a minute through his eyes. The silence stretches for a moment before Frankie speaks again.

“It’s Pope,” he says in a tone that’s never good. “He says he’s got a job.”

#frankie morales #francisco morales fanfic #francisco catfish morales #frankie morales fanfic #frankie morales x reader #pedro pascal #pedro pascal character fanfiction #pedro pascal fandom #pedro pascal fanfiction #pedro pascal characters #triple frontier #triple frontier fanfiction #triple frontier fan fiction #triple frontier fanfic #pedrostories #frankie whump #catie writes

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eternalgyu · 4 months ago

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okay starting a new series because of @slytherinshua send groups in and I'll rank discography either by album or song!! depending on how well ik them hehe

youha - soloist

last dance - let me tell u guys something. all of u that haven't listened go last dance by youha aren't living ur life to its fullest. have u ever felt ur life spiralling downwards? the cure is this song. you feel like ur relationship isn't working?? the cure is this song. ur dying?? listen to last dance by youha. the music video is equal parts cunty and beautiful. if u like songs like oh my god by g idle, anything on seulgi's album, or even like idk just cunty music listen to this song I beg u.

island - the queen the beginning pls she is the moment I made this list so I could listen to island on repeat I'm not even gonna lie. it's so summery and HIGH NOTE? such a solid debut

universe - goodnight this song is so pretty none of u guys get it. it makes up for the fact that there was barely any music from youha this year LMAO but ugh it's so melodic and just rly pretty I cannot :(

numb - this song I had no idea what to expect for this song tbh but it's so freaking good like the punk rock elements sound soooo good ugh!!

flight - CITY POPPPP guys the mv for this song is so pretty u don't get it youha is so stunning I need to listen to this song at night w my windows rolled down for real

zzz - such a comfy song AND THE HIGH NOTES??? LIKE HELLO?? her voice is actually so capable like???

abittipsy - such a pretty song and the mv is the cutest thing like hello? her tts r so yummy.

satellite - this song is such a good opener for the album u guys I love openings having the talking kinda singing (no idea if that makes sense at all help) but she has no other openings to compare to so uhm...

we - so cutee it's so lofi chill core pls and the beat is literally so yummy it's soda flavoured this is so dosii coded if u guys like their music!!

flower rain - prettyy not my favourite song but the instrumental is giving 2017 kpop a lil but sigh it's so good exactly how the title sounds

cherry on top - again not amongst my favourites the sound effects have me giggling BUT at the end of the day this is youha and she has no flops so I'm sure this is someone's cup of tea!!

ice t - not my favourite but if she wasn't nugu ppl would've ate this up it's giving peak kpop tt fr.

#eternalgyu ✮⋆˙#hannie ranks ✮⋆˙#in conclusion I love youha #youha #kpop layout

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yeonboy · 1 year ago

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𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐬𝐩𝐢𝐫𝐚𝐥 ♡ choi yeonjun // 13.

↦ dance crush;

After facing disappointment with love for years upon years, you have chosen to replace romance with dance in your life, dedicating your entire time to this dance academy you’re employed at. It’s not that you hate men now, you just don’t expect to fall for them anymore because all they do is break your heart. And then Choi Yeonjun enters your life as a new recruit at the academy – sweet, adorable, soft spoken, kind and younger than you. He is everything you have never found attractive in a guy before. But somehow, you’re helplessly spiraling for him.

— prev | masterlist | next

❧ warnings! profanity, mention of a twisted ankle, murder threats (as a joke), yj and yn simping over eo (in secret ofc), mentions of alcohol and being drunk.

— prev | masterlist | next

❧ notes! if i could inject lorde's melodrama into my veins, i fr would :') esp sober ii UGH the feels that song hits me with <///3 also, fun fact: this chapter features the most no. of characters so far (core 10 + ryujin & jungkook) lmao.

taglist: @bailies-me @samisubi @forever-in-the-sky2 @captivq @jiawji @hyuneyeon @wanlore @softcabur @emohazuzworld @yjusei @marifujioka

send in an ask to be added!

#txt #txt x you #txt x reader #txt smau #yeonjun #choi yeonjun #yeonjun smau #yeonjun fanfic #yeonjun x you #yeonjun x reader #txt imagines #yeonjun imagines #txt fluff #yeonjun fluff #txt fanfic #txt scenarios #yeonjun scenarios #kpop smau #tomorrow x together

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vcrnons · 1 year ago

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you have me intrigued about the dino dream

WHEJDJDHDH HELLO😭 ALL RIGHT SO HERE’S THE NIGHT DINO RUINED MY LIFE🫠🫠🫠

(i remember this entirely too vividly and that’s because sometimes i randomly think about it and it sends my entire day into a spiral, so im rly sorry for how long this is lmao) (writing this out has made me feel so incredibly delusional) (under the cut for length & also to prevent anyone who doesn’t want to be subjected to my dumb dream bs)

chan & i worked together and we were at some kind of a training day? type? thing? and i guess we must’ve been like passively flirty colleagues or something because when he came into the big training room (which we were all sat ON THE FLOOR IN??? where were the TABLES AND CHAIRS what even is my subconscious) he came and sat RIGHT next to me and we had this cute little small-talk moment before the actual training stuff started

so we’re sat on the ground and we’re being lectured about information governance and data protection and shit, and lmty i am NOT listening because i can’t stop staring at him??? fr my guy looked HEAVENLY you can’t blame me for this. N E way i’m sat like. knees bent & pulled up to my chest, he’s got one leg bent up, both his fuckin. strong ass arms wrapped around it. and one leg out flat because he’s insane and wanted me to suffer, probably. and i’m just trailing a finger up and down his arm the entire time, feeling his muscles, giggling to myself quietly and he keeps looking back at me and smiling and I WAS LIKE HELP. because. it was BLINDING and his eyes were so soft and i’m getting palpitations remembering it wait—

so we break for lunch, it’s a dumb little buffet style thing of just sandwiches and chips and that’s literally it. and we eat and everyone’s like “well this is shit” but it’s free food so we’re still going for it yk. good to know dream j takes food as seriously as awake j does. moving on!

a few minutes into this lunch he pulls me to one side and asks if we can talk so we went out into a corridor and apparently ig we’re in this big high-rise building with floor-to-ceiling windows, staring out over a city??? bro the view is INSANE. so. he gives me one of his AirPods, puts on a song, we’re just looking out over this city together and listening to the music. he turns the volume down and we start talking just quietly about fuck-knows-what, obviously it starts getting a little Juicy. we’re super close, basically in each others faces, noses TOUCHING. (what in the wattpad was i inhaling this day—) and HE TILTS HIS HEAD TO THE SIDE SO HES LIKE AN I N C H AWAY FROM KISSING ME AND HE SAYS “you know, if you wanted something more, all you had to do was ask”

SO OBVIOUSLY DREAM ME LOSES HER DAMN MIND AND NEARLY CRUMBLES TO THE FLOOR. LIKE. WHOOOO GAVE HIM THE RIGHT. WHO ALLOWED HIM TO BE SO SLICK WITH IT

and HE WENT IN FOR A KISS. BUT BECAUSE I WAS SO FKN NERVOUS AND THINKING “there’s no way this is happening rn—“, I SWERVED IT AND HE LIKE FREAKED OUT THINKING HE’D DONE SOMETHING WRONG SO HE RAN AWAY. I TRIED TO SHOUT AFTER HIM LIKE NO WAIT COME BACK BUT BRO WAS GONEEEEEEE

and then we had to go back into the training room so i went in and sat down where i was before but he SAT ON THE OTHER SIDE OF THE ROOM LOOKING ALL UPSET. and im trying to make eyes at him like babe come back im sorry let me explain BUT HE WOULDNT LOOK AT ME. and then fuckin. seungkwan comes over, crouches down, and is like

“hey, please don’t mess around with chan. he really, really likes you. never shuts up about you. if you don’t like him like that, it’s okay, but please just be gentle with him”

AND HE WAS SO SWEET BUT I WAS LIKE BRO DONT FUCKIN— I LIKE HIM I JUST GOT SCARED TELL HIM TO COME OVER HERE RN

but HE DIDNT. so at the end of the thing I just went over and dragged that man by his shirt out of the room and threw myself at him and explained everything and THEN WE FINALLY GOT THE SMOOCH. AND IT WAS JUST REALLY FUCKIN. IT WAS A LOT. IT WAS VERY A LOT. AND IM STILL NOT OKAY OVER IT. IF YOU WONDERED 🫠🫠🫠🫠🫠🫠🫠🫠

#💌 - mailbox.#mistarover #what the fuck do I even tag this as #I was absolutely wrecked when I woke up from this I need you to know #it was the night before pink dino in Japan. I woke up in distress AND THEN THERE WAS PINK DINO #AND IT WAS NOT OKAY #I lost all sight of who I was as a person for about 3 days #I think it was the final straw for accepting that I am a Bit in love w him #this is after I’d already had the ice-skating date dream btw. which. oof #that genuinely sends me into disrepair #I hardly remember most of the details but any time I think about it I get butterflies lmao #I’ve had a lot of dreams about these boys but for some reason Dino’s are always the most heart-stopping #he’s unbelievable 😭#shut up j #I need to go re-rb that post and tell u about the Vernon & Woozi stingray prophecy dream too #cant believe I forgot about that one #that was genuinely a covid fever dream so it’s. something else entirely

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ericsonclan · 2 years ago

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A Christmas Comfort Film

Summary: Brody starts getting overwhelmed by the holiday season so Mitch helps her try to calm down with her favorite Christmas movie.

Word Count: 1312

Read on AO3

Everything was stressing her out. No matter how much Brody took deep breaths and went over the steps to calm down, her anxiety wouldn’t leave her alone. She began to pace back and forth in the apartment as she made a mental checklist of everything that had to be done in the next few weeks. It was not the happiest time of year for her currently. In fact, Christmas always had a tendency to stress Brody out. She loved the holiday a lot and each year it was always a ton of fun but there was just so much to do. The sheer amount of items to do on her list only seemed to grow with each year. She blamed all the hyper extroverts she had been befriending lately over the last few years. Her feet whacked against the floor as she ran her fingers through her hair. The speed of her movement made Oreo and TNT’s eyes widen. Both kittens wiggled their butts, back and forth ready to pounce on the moving target. Brody was completely unaware of their mischievous intent until she felt TNT’s sharp claws in her foot.

“Ow! Fuck! TNT!” Brody yelled and watched as the kitten’s eyes widened, ear tucked down and back arched before scampering off. Oreo looked over at his brother then up at Brody, a pathetic-sounding meow leaving his lips.

“Fine, you can stay but you’re on thin ice, buddy.” She pointed her finger at the striped kitten but Oreo wasn’t fazed at all as he headbutted against her leg.

“What’s got you in a mood, Brodes?” Mitch strolled over with his usual teasing smile until he spotted his girlfriend’s expression. “Shit, what’s wrong?”

“Nothing!” Brody internally winced at the volume of her voice but she couldn’t seem to rein it in. “It’s just that everything is getting so fucking busy and everyone wants to do everything with me! Ruby keeps texting about what day we should make Christmas cookies, Louis wants to go Christmas caroling on Saturday but I already promised Sophie and Renata that I’d help them go shopping for White Elephant gifts for the Christmas work party and-” Brody was cut off her verbal spiral when her phone dinged with a text. Her shoulders instantly tensed and her breathing became uneven.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck.”

“Hey, it’s gonna be okay. You don’t have to answer that right away. People can wait.”

“It’s Ruby.”

“Okay, Ruby can fucking wait. Right now we’re gonna forget about all of them and focus on you. What do you want to do?”

Brody stopped her pacing when she heard her boyfriend’s question. She thought for a few seconds before her lips parted.

“I wanna watch a Christmas movie.” “Okay, then that’s what we’re gonna do,” Mitch walked over to the couch and worked to get the side pillows propped up. After that was done he disappeared into a different room for a minute. “Do you want your weighted blanket or the snowflake blanket?”

“The snowflake,” Brody sat down on the couch and worked to take a few deep breaths. She kept glancing over at her phone that was on the kitchen table, wondering if she should send a quick text. Before she could decide though Mitch had returned and worked to wrap the seasonal blue and white blanket around her. He leaned forward and pressed a kiss to her forehead then got to work getting the movie set up.

She didn’t even have to say which movie she wanted; Mitch knew. A few seconds passed before Dr. Seuss’ How the Grinch Stole Christmas music started to play over the menu screen. Mitch grabbed the DVD remote and made his way back to the couch where Brody was laying down. As soon as he sat down Brody scooted closer and cuddled up next to him. His arms soon wrapped around her, slowly brushing up and down her arms as he pressed a button and the movie started. The sounds of bells hummed from the TV as the logo of The Cat in the Hat showed up on the screen. The cartoon cat wiggled his eyebrows as the opening song began. The title of the movie appeared in front of a snowflake just as a small meow could be heard. Looking over, Brody spotted Oreo staring up at them with big eyes.

“Want him on your lap or not?”

“He can come up here,”

Mitch awkwardly shifted his weight to be able to pick up the kitten without messing with couch snuggles. Oreo was plopped down onto Brody’s lap and immediately the kitten began to purr loudly until his brother cried out as well. TNT was in the same spot as Oreo once was, waiting for his chance for cuddles.

“What about TNT?”

Brody shook her head. “No, I’m mad at him for attacking my foot.”

“Okay, you heard her, guess you don’t get cuddles for being shitty.”

Mitch’s answer did nothing to deter the young kitten who jumped up, fully believing he’d make it before he tumbled back down.

“Aww, baby. Mitch, help him up.”

“That didn’t take long,” Mitch teased but listened to his girlfriend and got the other kitten up on the couch as well. It took no time at all for the kittens to settle down and soon the couple returned their attention to the film just in time as the opening credits finished.

Animated snowflakes began to drift down from a dark blue background as the camera panned from snow-covered tree to snow-covered tree. The singing of the Whos started while they stood in a circle around a tree to bring it back to Who-ville. Brody started to hum along to the song as the Whos worked on the Christmas decorations, bopping her head lightly to the rhythm of the music. Her anxiety slowly began to slip away; she had a feeling it would as soon as Mitch set up this movie. This had always been her favorite Christmas film. Brody couldn’t remember how many times she had seen it, probably dozens of times by now. She knew each scene by heart and had the whole thing memorized, so much so that she had a tendency to quote movie lines as they were being said.

“Every Who down in Who-ville liked Christmas a lot but the Grinch,” Brody spoke and waited for the dramatic music notes to play before continuing. “Who lived just north of Who-Ville did not. The Grinch hated Christmas the whole Christmas season. Oh please don’t ask why, no one quite knows the reason.”

Mitch watched in silent amusement. He always enjoyed hearing his girlfriend’s rendition of the lines. It made the movie better for him. Sure, he had always enjoyed the movie growing up - Willy had been a sucker for it - but there was something special about watching it with Brody.

It felt like no time had passed before Mitch could sense Brody’s shoulders lose their tension. Her breathing had become steadier and she was completely relaxed as she leaned against him. Her soft smile never seemed to leave her lips during the entire movie and that proved true during the iconic song too. Once it started she began to sing along, nudging Mitch to join her. It took him a few seconds but he quickly joined in.

“You’re a mean one, Mr. Grinch,

You really are a heel

You’re as cuddly as cactus

You’re as charming as an eel

Mr. Grinch

You’re a bad banana with a greasy black peel!”

Mitch and Brody had hit lower notes with the last part, holding onto them for far too long. Both of them shared a look, smiling and laughing for a minute. All the stress and worries that came with the holiday season melted away in that moment and Brody finally started to feel the simple joys that came with Christmas.

#twdg #twdg brody #twdg mitch #twdg moody #twdg christmas #ericsonclanchristmaschallenge #ericson's diner au #fanfic

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edelweiss-coffee · 2 years ago

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🎶✨when u get this, list 5 songs u like to listen to, publish. then, send this ask to 10 of your favorite followers (positivity is cool)🎶✨

oooooo i love this game! my music taste is everywhere all at once so buckle up

paris - the 1975 (i cannot get enough of this song, inject it into my bloodstream fr i literally love matty healy so much i want to explode)

willie the pimp - frank zappa (i cry about frank zappa on the regular tbh)

ripple - the greatful dead (this song takes me back to being in my dad's back seat as a kid and listening to him sing. he loved music so much.)

wing beat fantastic - mike keneally (the lyrics to this song are too much for me and they make me spiral. its... much.)

next time might be your time - "blue" gene tyranny (this song makes me feel like an old friend is calling me on one of my bad days to try and cheer me up. it always works when i'm sad.)

#asks #answered asks #music talk #music #mutuals i would die for

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teddybeartoji · 10 months ago

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AJSHDHBEDWWUJXS EVERYTIME WE DO THIS I JUST HAVE TO START WITH A KEYBOARD SMASH BC THAT'S JUST HOW I FEEL

BEFORE I EVEN READ ANYTHING I ALREADY SAW U SAY SOMEWHERE ABOUT WRITING SOMETHING IN DE FORM AND I JUSTTTTT ASHAHSJGGQJHASAHGJSAJK I WAS THINKING THAT TOO I NEED U TO KNOW THAT I'M SO EXCITED

just so you know i put on the de soundtrack rn an i am so ready to dive into your head

like he just wakes up and he doesn’t Remember anything but there are bits and pieces still intact and gojo pretends not to know him to save him from the pain of it all. maybe it’s kind of like a test where the higher ups want to see if geto is capable of entering human society again… and his life is on the line….. but obv gojo doesn’t tell geto this

I 10000000000000000000000% SEE THE VISION???????

JUSTICE SKILL?????????????????

DEVOTION SKILL??? YEAHHHHHHH

BLUE SPRING OF YOUTH SKILL????????? ARI I'M KISSING U RN HOLY FUCKHSJAGDKDGJDGHWAKDH I WISH I COULD SEND YOU A VOICE MESSAGE OF ME SCREAMING I ADORE YOU AND YOUR GENIUS BRAIN SOOOOO MUCH IT'S ALMOST HURTING ME I CAN'T CONTAIN IT ANYMOOOORE THIS IS SO GOOD??? SO FUCKING GOOD YOU DESERVE EVERYTHING IN THE WORLD YOU AMAZE ME DO YOU UNDERSTAND

THE WHOLE DE FORMAT PART???????????? ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME I WOULD PAY YOU TO WRITE A FULL FIC LIKE THAT

SUGGESTION — He’s close. Close enough to touch, if you wanted to. Do you?LONGING [Medium: Success] — More than anything.

LIKE???????????????????????? I CAN'T EVEN THINK PROPERLY TO GIVE YOU AN ACTUAL REPLY BC I'M JUST SO... AMAZED BY THIS I'M SERIOUS IF ARI HAS A MILLION FANS I AM THERE IS ARI HAS ONE FAN IT'S ME AND IF ARI HAS NO FANS THE WORLD IS ENDING IT'S BURNING DOWN SOMETHING IS WRONG

”You… *really* aren’t making this easy, you know that?”

AJKBSHHKAJDJAKHDWJK3DWHDAWHD ARI YOU ARE NOT MAKING THIS EASY I'M SPIRALING ARI PLEASEEE I'M BEGGING FOR A FULL FIC (WAIT NO PRESSURE THOUGH JUST YK IF U WANT TO WRITE ONE YOU KNOW I'M HERE FOR YOU)

absolutely obsessed with your harry!geto i need to know more!!!! PLEASEPLEAAAASE

"fuck it. let's have more cryptids." gsahghgsagsahsghahgsa it's so them!!!!! this is the silly version fr AND OFC HE'D GO FOR THE INEXPLICABLE FEMINIST AGENDA TOO ME N GOJO ARE THE SAMEEE LOSERS UNITE!!!

btw survival of the fittest vs the longing can you hear me crying

i just randomly remembered that this song exists and i just.... IT FITS HARRY SO WELL LMAO IT'S SO STUPID

i'm sorry i don't have any new thoughts for you i don't i have to brain capacity to think in de way (atleast yet!)(i think i will when i replay it)(i hope so!)(and before you come at me for apologizing... this is my town i can do whatever i want)(i should not be in any sort of power position ever)

SHOKO IS 1000000000000000% GIVING KLAASJE VIBES WHAT THE FUCK ARI UR BRAIN IS LITERALLY THE BIGGEST THING IN THE WHOLE WIDE WORLD i can totally see her on that rooftop...... btw this just made me think about gojo!harry and geto!kim too lmao it kinda works doesn't it???

- @softgirlgonehaywire

RIGHT RIGHT RIGHTTTTT THEY’RE SOOO….. no because . just …… this lonesome smoking woman on a rooftop who never tells you more than vague half-truths and hides her humanity behind an air of feigned indifference ……… who tricks you and tricks you and tricks you until she’s all out of them…. who runs from city to city and loves revachol and wants it to love her back :(((( mickey i love klaasje so much she’s my favorite ever . AND THE SHOKO VIBES ARE SOOOO THERE they’re the same to me!!! like maybe klaasje is a tiny bit more morally dubious but shoko is also so gritty in a way . no sorcerers are saints i think there’s something a little Off w her <33

AND MICKEY MICKEY MICKEYY DONT SAY THAT MY BRAIN IS SPINNING SO FAST..,….. ok but . HEAR ME OUT . what if we switch the roles…… harry!geto & kim!gojo…….. geto who wakes up alone with no memories and a scar on his forehead and when he walks downstairs he meets a beautiful man who he doesn’t remember but said man shakes his hand and introduces himself and looks at him fondly. IT DOESNT WORK SUPER WELL bc geto isn’t silly enough to fully be Harry but just . harry’s whole theme of like…. being a pretty Bad person who gets the chance to reinvent himself is sooo geto to me.

OTHER THAN THAT THOUGH UR SOOO RIGHT it works so well like imagine them . on the balcony . geto is smoking and gojo is listening w stars in his eyes….. asking questions…. he’s so enamored w the city he’s so curious. the first thought that popped into my mind was gojo giving his hat to the cold bookstore girl :(((( GHHHHHH I NEED IT SO BAD STSG DLC WHENNNNN.

ALSO THIS MICKEY MICKEYYYYY THIS IS SOOO STSG ISNT IT LIKE IT EVEN WORKS ON BOTH ENDS….. i feel insane they’re the CUTEST .

#i'm literally in love with you #i mean it when i say this made me spiral #like i had to come back to this THREE TIMES AND I STILL DIDN'T GIVE YOU ANYHTING GOOD BACK SMHH #when i tell you that i'm obsessed with this I FUCKING MEAN OBSESSED #BLUE SPRING OF YOUTH IS A BULLET WITH MY NAME CARVED INTO IT #AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA #ARI YOU ARE WONDERFUL HAVE I SAID THAT #I HOPE YOUR CANDY IS SWEET AND YOUR TEA IS HOT AND YOUR PILLOW IS COLD #next week i can start playing again and then i'll take so many notes and then i can be of more use for this de satosugu dlc brainrot lmao #thank you my sweetest angel #ari <3 #friends!!#de <3

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melancholydreadfuldream · 3 years ago

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Going Under Part Five

Fandom: Doctor Who

Pairing: 13th Doctor x Reader

Summary: An accident during a routine adventure made your life spiraled out of control with only the Doctor as the anchor. Will you ever find your way back to your Doctor again?

Trigger Warning: ooc, angst, plot holes as usual, attempted suicide, dark!doctor, death, insanity, etc. You have been warned.

More warning: English is not my first language so beware of the headache you will receive upon reading this.

I found myself materialized inside some poorly lit room, disoriented and confused. I blinked my eyes trying to focus on the current surrounding.

Suddenly someone strangled me by the neck and pushed me toward a nearby wall. I have no idea who it was that attacked me. I tried to get the hand around my neck off in futile. I groaned in pain as my eyes tried to focus on the attacker.

"Did Jack send you?" The figure asked coldly.

I blinked in confusion. I know that voice. I gasped as my vision finally cleared enough. It was the Thirteenth Doctor. As I focused on her sudden appearance, I noticed something off about her. For once, she has a menacing look on her face and she wasn't dressed in her usual outfit. She was dressed in all black and she has different hair style, wavy hair that framed her already beautiful face.

"Doctor..." I managed to whisper her name.

She stared at me in surprise and then suddenly snarled angrily. "Don't call me by that name!" she said as she tighten her grip on my neck.

I gasped like a fish as I couldn't breathe. "It's me...(name)....Doct..." I don't understand why she attacked me but my mind supplied the answer, it is another version of the Doctor, one that apparently also has no idea who I am. "Please..." I begged her for mercy.

She glared at me coldly as she continue to cut me off from oxygen.

A bunch of people barged into the room. They have guns as they demanded the Doctor released me.

She glanced at me, rolled her eyes and released me as she raised her hands up in mocking gesture of surrender. The Doctor being pulled away from me roughly. I fell to the floor, gasping for breathe.

A man bend his knees beside me and asked in concern, "Are you okay?"

My eyes widened again. It was Jack Harkness. I lightly touch my sore throat as I glanced at the Doctor. The Doctor is being restrained. Her expression look bored now as she regarded everyone in the room with disinterest, as if she has not just attacked me violently.

Jack pulled me up and away from the room where the Doctor is. The room then sealed with complicated lock. I realized it was a holding room, like a prison. I warily stared at Jack.

Jack told me to sit down in the chair in another room. He wanted to check my neck. "It look bad. I will Tanya to look at it. She is a doctor." He said. "So...how did you get in? That room is deadlock so that nobody get in or out and yet you are able to come in undetected. Who are you?"

"It's complicated." You said.

"Well, try me."

This is Jack Harkness, a former companion of the Doctor in any universe, so I should be able to trust him, right? Beside, currently, it seemed he is more trustworthy than the Doctor. She just attacked me, after all.

"Before that, can you tell me what is wrong with the Doctor?"

Jack looked suspicious of me now. "How do you know the Doctor?"

"I am her companion...in the alternate universe." I finally relented and tell him the truth.

To my surprise, he accepted the explanation without much fuss. "I have seen so much in my lifetimes. I'm not surprised that alternate universe come into play now." Jack said with a shrug.

"What happened to her? And where are Yaz, Ryan and Graham?"

"Who?"

"You're kidding. Who is she traveling with then?"

Jack frowned. "She doesn't travel with anyone as far as I know. She called herself the Valeyard now. She gets angry if anyone call her the Doctor."

"I noticed." You said as you rubbed your throat while your mind flashback into the room. "What happened to her?"

Jack sighed. "Honestly I have no idea. I haven't seen the Doctor for a long while suddenly I heard rumors that she went insane, killing and maiming people, blowing up planet. She is not in a mood to be chatty about why she changed." he explained.

My mind flashed back into a version of dark Doctor I met before, how she torture that person who shot me. I gulped as I have a feeling this version of the Doctor is way more dark than the one I met before after listening what Jack said about the Doctor who called herself the Valeyard.

Jack explained to you the prophecy of the Valeyard, a most darker version of the Doctor.

"How are you able to imprison her then if she is that dangerous?" I asked curiously as I warned him not to underestimate the Doctor, Valeyard, whatever.

Jack explained he tried to reason with the Doctor at first but that did not end well with her killing Jack's friend as if she is making her point of her no longer the Doctor.

He tried to multiply times to capture her and stop her reign of evil but failed. It was a genuine luck Jack is able to meet the right people and able to outsmart the Doctor. Or so everyone think. Of course, Jack knew better that it might be a trap. He is trying his best to rehabilitate the Doctor.

Jack stood up and walked toward the giant computer in the room, one of the monitors showed the room where he imprisoned her.

"It was like after the last regeneration, she just gave up and actively choose to be the Valeyard..." Jack said. "I heard the rumor of her cruelty...even her kindness is a double edge of sword thing...she is just brutal..." he said. "Of course, I found it weird that we are able to capture her. She is up to something but I have no idea what."

I frowned as I realized that maybe this world's version of Twelfth Doctor, after he lost Bill and Nardole, regenerated into this dark version of Thirteen Doctor. My heart hurts for her. I thought of my Doctor, how she suffered so many lost and still able to overcome it. Of course, there will be alternate universe where she just gave up.

"Who was the Doctor's last companion? Was it Bill Potts and Nardole?" I asked Jack and he confirmed it after he checked his file on the computer.

I coughed suddenly and it turned into a bout of cough as I tried to cover my mouth.

"Hey, are you okay?" Jack asked me after he noticed the blood between my fingers. He offered me water.

I cleared my throat, accepted the water and reached around for my medicine but to my horror, I couldn't find the bottle.

It was then the Doctor, no, the Valeyard suddenly called out from the monitor. "Looking for this?" she asked, showing the bottle of my medicine in her hand. She looked so smug. "I will return it to you, (name), after we talk."

She knew that I needed the medicine, she somehow knew that the medicine is for internal bleeding. "Tiktok, dear (name)."

I flinched at her tone. I exchanged a look with Jack. I was afraid to get into the room with her but I do need the damn medicine.

"It is your call, if you want to talk to her, I will make sure she does not attack you again." Jack said.

I tried to be brave as I prepared the face her. She wanted to speak to me alone.

"W-what do you want?" I asked.

"I'm bored. You are the first entertainment I had in a while." She said with a pout. "I just want a conversation. I promise I will behave." She winked at me.

Apparently, she is curious about me and how I know her as she never met me before. So, I told her the truth that I am from alternate universe where I am her companion alongside with Yaz, Ryan and Graham.

She looked curious when I mentioned alternate universe but get bored real quick when I told her my condition is the result of me trying to protect her alternate self. She is more curious about the weapon but I don't know much about it.

"Can I have my medicine back?" I asked politely.

She hummed and shook her head. "I think I will hold on to it for a bit. I still have some questions."

I am nervous around her and get jumpy if she get too close to me and she knew that, still do it on purpose. It feels like I amused her and she is toying me now.

I gulped. She is acting all nice now but she still feel intimidating. I figured I could hold on for a bit and hope I will splinter away from here soon.

"So, who gave you this medicine? One of my alternate self?" She asked.

I nodded.

Suddenly an alarm sounded loudly making me flinched.

"Well, that is my cue..." She suddenly said.

My mind registered what she said a bit slow and before I could do anything, she suddenly took a grip of my wrist.

With a chilling smile, she said, "You are coming with me."

"W-why?" I asked dumbly.

"Like I said I'm bored, your condition is interesting, I want to study it." She grinned menacingly. "Who know, maybe if you are good, I might even get you a cure."

"N-no."

She rolled her eyes. "It is cute you think you have a choice." She gripped my wrist so hard I hissed in pain.

I laughed at her suddenly. I was hysterical now. "I don't have a choice since this whole thing happened..."

It was at that moment Jack entered the room with a gun. "Release her, Valeyard!"

The Valeyard seemed amused with Jack but she did release her grip on my wrist. She suddenly stepped forward menacingly toward Jack.

"Don't come any closer." Jack warned but she ignored him. He shot her.

I flinched at the sound of the gun. It was then I felt the tingling.

The Valeyard laughed as if she is not just gotten shot. "Really, Jack, a gun? You should know better than..."

I couldn't hear anything anymore as I splinter away from that horrid place.

7777

"(name)? (name)!" Someone shook me awake. "Are you okay?"

I blinked as my vision cleared up. It was River Song, she is wearing an astronaut suit. "River?" I hesitantly called out. She knew me. Which River is she? "Where are we?"

"We are in the library." River answered.

"Inside the Tardis?"

"No. We are in a planet called the Library." She explained as she pulled me to stand up. It was then she noticed the red handprint around my wrist. "You are hurt."

I pulled my wrist away from her but she suddenly reached out to touch my face as she noticed the hand mark around my neck.

River looked angry. "Who hurt you?"

"It was a long story." I lied. I finally noticed the Tenth Doctor and he is with Donna, staring at us suspiciously.

River pulled me to the side and explained that the Doctor and Donna has no idea who I am but she did because she had met me in her past before. "I guess you could say this is the first time you met me, this version of me."

I had a fit of cough again.

"Your medicine..." River said. "You should take one."

"I can't. Someone took it from me." I said weakly.

"The same person who leave these marks on you?"

I nodded.

"I would like to have words with this person."

I felt vulnerable and the way River spoke, she sounded so protective of me, and suddenly I couldn't hold the tears.

"It was the Valeyard..." I said.

River froze in horror at that. "Valeyard?" She asked for confirmation. "You met a version of the Doctor who called himself the Valeyard?"

"It was her, actually, not a him." I said forlornly.

River looked sad for me. "I'm sorry, it must be hard for you."

I glanced at her sadly. She even know what the female version of the Doctor meant to me. She knew I traveled with the Thirteenth Doctor.

She explained to me what the Valeyard is to me. Like Jack said, it was a darker version of the Doctor devoid of any care for those the Doctor stand for.

"If you ever met that version of the Doctor again, you should run for your life." River said.

"Trust me, I never want to see her again. I hope I never have to see her ever again." I said, shuddered at the reminder of the Valeyard's cold, unfeeling eyes on me.

The Doctor stared at me and River curiously and he suddenly walked toward us. He introduced himself to me.

I told him my name. He said hi to me and then asked if I am also someone from his future.

"She is." River answered for me. "But she can't tell anything more. Spoiler."

I turned my eyes questioningly at River. I usually have to tell the Doctor about me being alternate companion and stuff.

River shrugged. "I'm sorry, (name), but I need him not to be distracted right now." She informed me of the vastra nevada situation on their hands. "I suppose you would better off not taking that medicine of yours. The sooner you splinter away from here the better. It isn't safe for you."

When the situation got worst, the Doctor wanted to send Donna back into the Tardis and River wanted to do the same for you but the Doctor refused, saying he doesn't trust you or River. River tried to calm herself. I felt like she is second away from slapping the hell out of the Doctor.

I pulled River to the side. "I will be okay, River. I will have to splinter anyway sometime soon." I said. "Beside, you said you met me in the past, so I will probably be okay, we will all survive this situation."

River still look worried. "Time can be rewritten sometimes..."

I blinked at her. Wait, so there is a chance we could get eaten by these shadow monster? I internally started to freak out.

"(name), make sure you stay by my side at all times." River said.

I am not complaining so I stick by River side.

After Anita got two shadow on her back and with Donna possibly dead, the Doctor seemed to get emotional and get mad at River. River didn't take his crap and told him to calm down. She whispered something in the Doctor's ear. The Doctor look shocked as he glanced at River. They seemed to talk again in whispers. I got the feeling that they were talking about me now as the Doctor stared at me in curiosity and wonder.

River told me that she finally tell the Doctor that I am his alternate future companion and will be someone he need to protect in the future.

I glanced at River in worry. "Why? What is in my future?"

River smiled. "Don't worry about it, (name), let focus on now, shall we?"

They eventually figured out about CAL keeping Donna and the rest of the survivors. The Doctor said he need to download them back and he even goes oncoming storm on the shadow monster, telling them to search information about the Doctor in the library. River suddenly punched the Doctor much to my surprise. She told me the Doctor has to survive the Library.

I realized that River is about to sacrifice herself after hearing how the Doctor won't be able to survive the download. "River, isn't there any other way?" I asked in concern. I really don't want her to die. "River!"

River is busy making the preparation and didn't answer me for a while much to my frustration. She told me that she knew she will die in the Library anyway that today will be her last day to see the Doctor. She said the Doctor knew it too. She suddenly turned at me and grabbed my face. I blinked at her in confusion. She tenderly kissed my forehead. "You will be okay, (name). I'm sorry, I'm so sorry for all the hardship that you will have to endure but remember, you will be okay."

"River..."

She released you as she continued her work.

"There has to be a way, River, you can't die here." I pleaded with her.

"There is no other way. The Doctor has to survive today or the future will be rewritten." River said. She turned to me and smiled softly. "It's alright, (name), we will see each other again somewhere in your future."

I couldn't help my eyes being a bit teary, I felt emotional toward River for some reason. She is kind to me from the moment I landed here and she said we are friend and now I discover she will die here? I can't accept it but there is nothing I can do. And, of course, at that moment I felt the tingling. I don't want to leave. I don't want her to die alone.

River smiled at me. "I know that face. You are about to go, aren't you? Go, (name), It is okay. I would rather you are not here to see what happen next..."

I hugged her immediately and she hugged me back. I released her and then I was gone.

7777

I wiped away the tears in my eyes with my hand so that I could see where I landed to this time. My mouth dropped open when I realized I was in some train in space. Before I could do or say anything, an officer suddenly grabbed me, calling me a stowaway.

"She is with us." I heard someone said. It was Twelfth Doctor and he is with Clara. They sort it off with the officer and they let me go.

Clara turned to me and smiled. "It was nice seeing you again, (name)."

I smiled at her. "Same. Wait, the last time we met, was it with that time with Robin Hood?" I asked.

Clara nodded with a laugh.

I grinned with her before turning to the Doctor who is staring at me calculatingly. I suddenly felt self-conscious about the marks on my neck and wrist which thankfully I was able to cover with my coat but I have a feeling that he already saw a glimpse of it. I cursed myself for not being careful.

Clara pulled my arms and took us to the scene of party.

I scrunched my nose at the taste of the drink. "I don't like it."

Clara grinned and talked to me about how I am doing so I lied that I am okay so far.

I felt out of place in here due not wearing the period-appropriate dress for the occasion. I have fun in the party, eating some of the food. I watched as Clara and the Doctor talked to each other but I couldn't hear their conversation but they both looked sad for some reason.

There was some incident on the train. Some old lady died after yelling loudly about some intruder. I glanced at the Doctor, wondering if he will investigate and Clara asked the same but the Doctor said it was nothing.

Clara took me to a room on the train. I felt happy to see a bed but also annoyed realizing I couldn't rest properly for I don't have the medicine to delay splinter. But I used the time I have to wash my face and body. I suddenly remembered how the last Eleventh Doctor licked my face. I scrunched my nose and washed my face again.

After that, Clara and I shared a bed as we tried to get some rest. We couldn't though so we ended up talking. Clara told me she wanted to stop traveling with the Doctor and that today trip apparently supposed to be their last hurrah. I felt bad now to crash it with my appearance but she told me not to. She said she is happy to see me again and once again asked if I am really okay as she pointed to the marks on my neck. Apparently, she noticed it too.

I sighed. "I am fine now at least. I'm just...tired you know. I want to go home. I just...wonder if I will ever..." I shook my head tiredly.

Clara wrapped her arms around me suddenly, rubbing my back in comforting gesture. I am grateful for the comfort all the alternate Doctors and their companions gave me. I remembered what River said about me will be okay but I don't feel like I will though. In fact, I almost feel like I'm about to have a nervous breakdown soon.

Clara couldn't sleep so she goes to the Doctor, wanting to investigate if there is something going on in the train. She told you to get some rest. I honestly felt tired so I decided not to go with her.

Not long after she left, I had a fit of cough again. I stared at the blood and washed my hands. I could feel my condition get worst now. I really need to get the new medicine from the Doctor. I stood up, wanting to go search for the Doctor for I knew this version actually have the medicine as he said it during the Robin Hood fiasco. But I get a headache suddenly as the surrounding started to blur. I fell back to the bed as everything turned black.

I woke up to the frantic Clara. She asked me if I have taken my medicine yet.

"I don't have it." I whispered weakly. "I lost it."

"You should have told us, (name), the Doctor will have one on board the Tardis." Clara said as she pulled me up. "Come on, (name), we have to go. It isn't safe here."

I couldn't focus on her at all but she was saying something about a mummy on the train, something about sixty-six seconds left to live once targeted and how it goes after the weakest in a bunch. I blinked awake when she told me the Doctor deduced that I could be next due to my condition. She took me to some lab where the Doctor and a bunch of people are.

It was then I saw the mummy. I freaked out but I was also too weak to run or do anything else but staring at the mummy. I heard Clara yelling at the Doctor and then suddenly the Doctor is in front of me, clutching my face on both hands, talking really fast about transferring the link the mummy had with me on himself. He went inside my head somehow, tracking down the link and pulled it to him but as he did, he seemed to froze. He stared at me in horror but he composed himself and turned to face the mummy.

I fainted after that and woke up on some rocky-filled place. I heard the Doctor telling Clara about sometimes the only choices are bad choices.

The Doctor noticed me awake and pulled a bottle from his coat pocket. It was my back-up medicine.

I smiled gratefully at him. "Thank you, Doctor."

He suddenly tousled my hair around in somewhat awkward but affectionate way. He glanced at me. "Hang in there, (name)...and I'm sorry..."

I was confused why he is apologizing to me.

He looked grim now. "I saw it...inside your head...the Valeyard...and River."

I glanced at him, suddenly mourning for River again. "I'm sorry too, Doctor, about River."

The Doctor sighed as he sat beside me. I put my head on his shoulder. Clara watched us with a fond smile. I wanted to hug them but I felt too weak to do anything. I should probably take one right now so I could...

I felt the tingling much to my disappointment. I pulled away from the Doctor and smiled at him and then at Clara. "See you soon." I said to them.

tags: @thatsonezesty13 , @newheart97, @gracie-and-the-superwholock-gang

@itsyaspwr

A/N: I want to say thank you for those who comments/reblog/kudos my stories, especially those who comments, I love re-reading your comments, give me energy boost and the believe that my stories are not that bad. So, thank you so much!

I know this is shorter than the last four chapters but hopefully it will be enough for now.

#13th doctor x reader #thirteenth doctor x reader #doctor who x reader #doctor who fanfiction #doctor who imagine #shiefenwrites

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sourstars · 4 years ago

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🎸 gimme gimme 👉🏻👈🏻

made me think of mama mia with that “honey honey uh huh—” gets smacked

DIFNSKC OKAY OKAY FR NOW BUT HI I MISS YOU LOSER GO DRINK YOUR WATER

send me 🎸 and i’ll make a playlist of 5+ songs from my music on shuffle!

for you since i’ve known you for so long i was tempted to put all star but it’s actually:

make it stop — coin

death row — bebe rexha

please don’t eat the daises — doris day

hyacinth — tri patterns

dollar for your sadness — unlike pluto

in a spiral — phantogram

freedom — wham!

hesitate — golden vessel

before you go — lewis capaldi

it’s raining men — the weather girls

bonus:

pancakes for dinner — lizzy mcalpine

is it just me? — emily burns

all star — smash mouth

#studio interviews: k atsukidayo #studio’s co producers

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frogsagainandagain · 7 years ago

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favorite lyric from every fob song

i’m so sorry this is so long please skip this is mainly for me to be able to reference

*songs with incredible lyrics throughout that it was extra hard to choose one or two

honorable mention: and maybe next time/i’ll remember not to tell you something stupid like I’ll never leave your side

calm before the storm: you said, between your smiles and regrets: “don’t say it’s over.”

switchblades and infidelity: walking out on the show is walking out on you/and walking out on you’s still the best thing that I ever did.

pretty in punk: well I’ve seen your boyfriend/and i don’t think he treats you right/but that’s none of my business is it?

growing up*: i’ve dried my eyes, now it’s “rushmore”/i’m deep with futures like chicago/no, glenview never meant a thing to me/she never meant a thing to me

the world’s not waiting (for five tired boys in a broken down van): we’re all “hasbeens” and “never-were’s”

short, fast and loud: good god i wish i was tall

moving pictures: where can I go when I want you around/but I can’t stand to be around you

parker lewis can’t lose (but i’m gonna give it my best shot): in the meantime just talking with my shoes/converse with my converse

tell that mick: stop burning bridges and drive off of them

dead on arrival: i know I’m not your favorite record/but the songs you grow to like never stick at first

grand theft autumn: you need him/i could be him

saturday: and i read about the afterlife/but I never really lived

homesick at space camp: landing on a runway in chicago and I’m grounding all my dreams/of ever really seeing california

sending postcards: when you go i will forget everything about you

chicago is so two years ago*: she took me down and said:/“boys like you are overrated. so save your breath." bonus: with every breath i wish your body will be broken again

the pros and cons of breathing: i want to hate you half as much as i hate myself

grenade jumper: living like life’s going out of style.

reinventing the wheel: i can’t wake up to these reminders of who i am:/a failure at everything… 18 going on extinct.

patron saint*: and when it all goes to hell/and when it all goes.

my heart is the worst kind of weapon: we are salt - you are the wound

it’s not a side effect: and think of all the places/where you’ve been lost/and then found…out/in between my sheets/in between the rights and the wrongs

our lawyer: we’re only good cause you can have almost famous friends

gin joints: i used to waste my time dreaming of being alive (now i only waste it dreaming of you)

dance, dance: joe trohman is lame

sugar: isn’t it messed up how i’m just dying to be him?

nobody puts baby in the corner: you look so good in blue

dark alley: joke me something awful just like kisses on the necks of "best friends”

atavan halen: i’ll be stuck fixated on one star/when the world is crashing down

sophomore slump*: cause i swear i’d burn this city down to show you the light

champagne: they say, “you want a war? you’ve got a war.”/but who are you fighting for?

i slept with: douse yourself in cheap perfume it’s/so fitting, so fitting of the way you are

sixteen candles*: she said, she said, she said, “why don’t you just drop dead?" bonus: so say what are you waiting for?/kiss her, kiss her

get busy*: i used to obsess over living,/now I only obsess over you

XO: to the "love”, i left my conscience pressed/between the pages of the bible in the drawer

snitches and walkers: show me a starry-eyed kid/i will break his jaw

the music or the misery*: it’s true romance is dead, i shot it in the chest then in the head. bonus: and if you wanna go down in history then i’m your prince bonus bonus: i went to sleep a poet, and i woke up a fraud

thriller: i can take your problems away with a nod and a wave/of my hand, ‘cause that’s just the kind of boy that i am

take over, breaks over: don’t pretend you ever forgot about me.

arms race: i wrote the gospel on giving up/(you look pretty sinking)

me & you: the best way/to make it through/with hearts and wrists intact/is to realize/two out of three ain’t bad/ain’t bad

hum hallelujah*: i thought I loved you/it was just how you looked in the light.

golden: and i knew that the lights of the city were too heavy for me

thnks fr th mmrs: get me out of my mind and get you out of those clothes

don’t you know: i could learn to pity fools as I’m the worst of all/and i can’t stop feeling sorry for myself

the after life of the party: put love on hold,/young hollywood is on the other line

tunnel of love: got postcards from my former selves saying: “how’ve you been?”

doldrums: you’re wrong/are we all wrong?

fame > infamy: “there’s too much green to feel blue”

you’re crashing*: the headline reads “the man hangs”, but the jury doesn't bonus: baby boy can’t lift his headache head

ringing in my ears: new york eyes, chicago thighs

ginasfs: threw caution to the wind,/but i’ve got a lousy arm

hard to say: but don’t get the wrong idea/we’re gonna shoot you

lullabye: when you wake up the world will come around

disloyal order*: what a match, i’m half doomed and you’re semi-sweet bonus: boycott love/ detox just to retox

i don’t care: say my name and his in the same breath/i dare you to say they taste the same

winona: bop bop ba dop

america’s suitehearts: why won’t the world revolve around me?

headfirst slide: i don’t just want to be a footnote in someone else’s happiness

(shipped) gold standard: plant palm trees on lake michigan before it gets cold/i gotta feel the wind chill again before i get old

(coffee’s for closers)*: i will never believe in anything again/though change will come

donnie: i’m the one/who charmed the one/who gave up on you

27: you’re a bottled star/the planets align/you’re just like mars/you shine in the sky

tiffany blews: dear gravity, you held me down in this starless city

wams*: what makes you so special?/i’m gonna leave you/i’m gonna teach you/how we’re all alone

nosebleed: goes to the desert the same war his dad rehearsed/came back with flags on coffins and said,/”we won, oh we won.“

west coast smoker: got my degree in the gutter,/my heart broken in the dorms of the ivy league

pavlove: i want to make you as lonely as me/so you can get, get addicted to this

the phoenix: wearing our vintage misery/no, i think it looked a little better on me

light em up: a constellation of tears on your lashes/burn everything you love, then burn the ashes

alone together: but i don’t think i’m coming home and i said/i’ll check in tomorrow if i don’t wake up dead

where did the party go: my old aches become new again/my old friends become exes again

just one yesterday: letting people down is my thing, baby/find yourself a new gig/this town ain’t big enough for two of us

the mighty fall: two’s a whole lot lonelier than one

miss missing you*: baby, you were my picket fence bonus: i will sing to you every day/if it will take away the pain

death valley: undress to impress/you can wear the crown but you’re no princess

young volcanoes: come on make it easy/say i never mattered (basic ik)

rat a tat*: i’m the lonelier version of you/i just don’t know where it went wrong \

srar: how’d it get to be only me?/like i’m the last damn kid still kicking/that still believes

the king is dead: the may never think and wonder why, dear christ/every time i see you i just want to paint the walls white

art of keeping up disappearances: erase the conclusion/but never meant to clear up/any of the confusion

hot to the touch: if it’s never been broken/can’t believe in it/now you’re just a problem/for someone else to fix

love, sex, death: but out of every pretty pretty miscalculation/you have got to be my all-time favorite

eternal summer: i can’t do this again/i need more oxygen

demigods: what if we were demigods?/they’d take to our knees/raging at the half of our sins

american made: when i was younger i couldn’t wait for the days to pass/now i know they’ll never last/and i just want my childhood back

caffeine cold: don’t breathe life into a monster then/complain when he destroys it all again

irresistible: too many war wounds and not enough wars/too few rounds in the ring and not enough settled scores/too many sharks, not enough blood in the waves

ab/ap: i think i. i fell in love again/maybe i just took too much cough medicine

centuries: heavy metal broke my heart bonus: we are the poisoned youth

the kids aren’t alright*: and i still feel that rush in my veins./it twists my head just a bit too thin./all those people in those old photographs I’ve seen are dead.

uma thurman: the end of the fucking song

jet pack blues*: did you ever love her? do you know?/or did you never want to be alone?

novocaine: if you knew, knew what the bluebirds sang at you,/you would never sing along

4th of july: you are my favorite "what if”/you are my best “I’ll never know”

favorite record: and i confessed, confessed to you/riding shotgun underneath the purple skies

immortals: i try to picture me without you but i can’t

hotel in nyc: a birth and a death on the same day/and honey I only appeared so i can fade away/i wanna throw my hands in the air and scream/and i could just die laughing on your spiral of shame

young and menace?? champion?? i’m sorry who?? what?? huh???

hold me tight or don’t: i got too high again/when i realized i can’t not be with you/or be just your friend/i love you to death but i just can’t/i just can’t pretend/we were lovers first/confidants but never friends/were we ever friends?

the last of the real ones: 'cause you’re the last of a dying breed/write our names in the wet concrete

7-9 legendary: i want to choke (u)/and get sick off of you/like secondhand smoke

alpha dog: i want to put the midwest home again

austin we have a problem: i gave you pretentious./i gave you indifference, but you only wanted undressed and defenseless. bonus: hey! everyone’s an underdog.

catch me if you can: oh dear lord,/please let me into heaven, for just an afternoon.

from now on we are enemies: a composer but never composed/singing the symphonies of the overdosed

guilty as charged: i got greater expectations than oliver twist

hand of god*: it’s not gossip if it’s the truth/i’m sick of always writing songs for you to slit your wrists to

lake effect kid*: i’ve got the skyline in my veins/forget your night times/summer love on a gurney with a squeaky wheel/and joke us, joke us/till lakeshore drive comes back into focus

mskwyditd (demo)*: we sold our souls in dark hotel rooms/we slip tongues and lie like “i will see you soon”

star 67: maybe we could talk this over/but i swear to god/and i’ll have this phone to my head.

we don’t take hits, we write them: and my life is holding our heads to this gun/you and your new boy think you can come in and keep me off, but you’re wrong

yule shoot your eye out: and all i want this year is for you to dedicate your last breath to me/before you bury yourself alive

#fall out boy #fob #fall out boy lyrics #fob lyrics #evening out with your girlfriend #take this to your grave #from under the cork tree #infinity on high #folie a deux #save rock and roll #american beauty/ american psycho #mania #reference #mine

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drmiralife · 7 years ago

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Yousef-No-chill-Acar’s POV - A fanfic

This is my idea of what Yousef might have been thinking and what might have made him act the way he did in Episode 5 at SYNG and also Episode 6. I just wanted to put myself in his shoes, rather than being mad at him any longer, and try to make light of this messy Yousana situation. The first chapter is a throwback to the development of his feelings and how he experienced the past encounters with Sana in the prior episodes, the next will be about Even, the fight and the Noora kiss. Hope you like it and I am open to suggestions and ideas <3 (Was gonna post this onto http://archiveofourown.org, but seems like I need a few days to get accepted lol)

PART ONE

Yousef was lying in his bed, smiling like an idiot. Elias had just texted him, that Sana invited all the boys to come to a Karaoke party tonight. That alone made him extremely happy. But when Elias added, that Sana explicitly wanted him to come, his whole body and soul bursted in anticipation. Sana, the beautiful, strong, smart Sana Bakkoush, wanted him, the guy who is desperately crushing over her, to be there. He couldn’t believe it.

Yousef couldn’t exactly pinpoint the moment he started to develop feelings for Sana. It’s been a long time coming. He has known her for years as his best friend’s younger sister, but as kid’s she was just that, Elias’ cute little sister. But once they grew up, he realized that now this fondness had turned to attraction: She had those dark green almond shaped eyes, a delicate little nose, prominent cheeks that were perfectly framed by her black Hijab, and full lips, which spread into the most heart-warming smile, revealing a perfect set of white teeth and his favourite feature - her beautiful dimples. Every time Yousef saw them, his heart seemed to skip a beat. But she hadn’t just enchanted him with her looks. Sana had become exceptionally strong over the years. She knew how to stand her back in front of her brother and his comments. She also seemed to be really smart, she was passionate about her believes and hobbies, she was loyal and kind. The list could go on forever.

But until a few weeks ago he hadn’t dared to live out this crush, Sana was his best friend’s little sister after all and she was very faithful to her religion, which he admired and was one of the many reasons Yousef started liking her, but he had lost his faith and knew that this would be a hard obstacle to overcome. Plus he didn’t even know if she would like him back. Yes, he had seen some of what seemed like curious looks and smiles from her part, but how could he know, she wasn’t just being kind?

Sana has slowly been taking over his mind more and more, but nothing but friendly looks and small sentences were shared between them. When Elias made a ridiculous comment about her being a russ, he couldn’t help himself. Yousef wanted to cheer her up, so he found a Khaleesi meme and edited it for her. Then after a long internal debate he finally sent her a friend request on Facebook, something he wanted to do forever and once she accepted, he delivered the meme right away. His heart was racing as if he had just run a marathon. But when she didn’t respond, he regretted sending it.. What was he thinking? He kept checking his phone every two minutes. But she didn’t answer. He felt so stupid. He was spiralling into an abyss of overthinking: So Sana accepted my FR, that’s good right? That could mean she likes me? But why didn’t she answer then? Fy faen, she probably thinks I’m not funny! Maybe she just wants to be friends. But she could have answered right? Maybe she got busy and couldn’t.. Yes that’s what happened! OR she is weirded out by the fact I send that awful meme.. WHAT WAS I THINKING?!

He was feeling really shitty until he saw her again at the Bakkoush Household. How can a person look so beautiful eating a carrot?, he had thought and all of the past worries were forgotten instantly. He was drunk on Sana. When he saw Mama Bakkoush leave the kitchen, he couldn’t help it. Yousef excused himself, went to the kitchen and told Sana he was there to get something to drink. Yeah right.. He needed to walk past her to get to the fridge and he was feeling really desperate. In that moment Yousef had no chill and he didn’t car. There was a lot of space between Sana and the kitchen table, but regardless of that, he got as close as possible walking past her, stopping a second to look at her back, taking in her scent, while an Ed Sheeran song was playing. This moment would later haunt him in his dreams as the first close encounter they had had so far. Once he got the juice, he was back to looking at her failing to do as simple a task as peeling a carrot. It was hilarious to him. First he starred and enjoyed the show, but he couldn’t see her failing like that for long. He took the initiative and started talking to her, trying to teach her how to peel a carrot. But she failed again. So he took the peeler from her, and in that moment their fingers brushed each other and an electric current went through his body. Now he was also high on Sana. They started talking about his job at a kindergarten, liking children, about how many kids she wanted to have and how many kids he wanted to have. Real smooth Acar, real smooth. During that conversation her magnifying smile had spread across her full cheeks, revealing her cute dimples. And this time they were only directed at him and it gave him an amazing feeling he had never experienced with any girl before. They were way too soon interrupted by Elias, telling Yousef jokingly to stop flirting with Sana. Yousef feeling embarrassed tried to deflect that statement.

Later while still drunk and high on Sana, he wrote her again on Facebook, in hopes she would understand that he did in fact try to flirt with her and this time she answered. They started talking and he was giving all his best to let her subtly know that he liked her, without having to say it. He had allowed himself to believe that there was hope for the both of them, until one night when Sana had her russ friends over at her house and he and the boys just happened to interrupt. There were over approximately 20 drunk girls dancing in the living room and Sana’s parents would be coming home any minute. So Yousef and Elias threw all the girls out for Sana, who seemed overwhelmed with the task by herself, and helped remove the evidence. Once the parents came home, they did find a bottle of Vodka, so Yousef just took the fault, blaming it on a friend. Sana’s parents didn’t seem happy at all, but as long as Sana wouldn’t get into trouble, he wasn’t feeling bad about it. Once Elias and him left, Yousef got a text from Sana, thanking him. He liked that thought, him as her hero, but it didn’t last long, because she said she would find a way to convince her parents that he was a good Muslim after all. There it was, the topic he had feared to bring up. But he knew regardless of his worries that he had to be honest, Sana deserved to know. So Yousef told her that he didn’t believe in Allah. And then he didn’t hear from her again. He should have known it was too soon, but he couldn’t just lie to her forever.

Yousef kept writing her on Facebook, trying to deflect the topic with some jokes. And each time he didn’t get a respond his heart was breaking a little. She eventually removed him as a friend from Facebook, a blow Yousef hadn’t expected. A week after the bottle incident, Elias was at his place and had gotten drunk. Yousef didn’t know what was going on with his friend, but he knew he couldn’t stay at his place, because his parents would be home any time soon. But he also knew he couldn’t just send Elias home, so he had to call the one person he was hurting over-Sana. He took her number out of Elias phone and called, the first time she didn’t answer. He was getting desperate and the clock was ticking. The second time she picked up and Sana suggested bringing Elias to her best friend’s house. He had met Noora at a Party with Sana’s other friends before. She was a really nice and kind girl, easy to talk to. He liked the fact Sana had such a great friend. Back in the day the circumstance that Sana’s friends were all without a doubt non-Muslim, had given him hope to even take a first step towards her. He was obviously wrong.

While leaving the apartment building with Sana he offered to walk her home, which she first declined, but he insisted. While walking they kept a safe distance, which felt like kilometres to him. The uncomfortable silence and shy glances didn’t help at all. The air between them was filled with unspoken issues and his mind was racing to find a way to start a conversation, but it was blank. Until he saw a football on the side of the street. He went over to get it, kicked it and started passing it in front of him. Then he remembered Sana liked Basketball more, so he kicked the ball up and started dribbling it with his hand. Soon after Sana asked him what Elias had been drinking, so Yousef answered teasingly Vodka. While Sana was taken of guard, he passed the ball towards her, which she obviously couldn’t catch. Then Yousef started teasing her about her bad reaction. The way her competitiveness lit up and she confidently strut towards Yousef with the ball tucked under her arm and hot temperament adorning her soft face, did beautiful things to his mind he couldn’t even begin to describe. He quickly began apologizing while still laughing to not feel her wrath and told her to pass the ball, which she did full force. A basketball court was just around the corner and they started playing. Yousef was surprised how well Sana played and how natural it came to her. Yousef made a mental note that he needed to practice. But he didn’t care about his pride being hurt, because Sana smiling from cheek to cheek made more than up for it. She was amazing and he was awestruck.

Once they got tired they sat down to catch their breaths. After a while Sana asked him why he didn’t believe in Allah and he told her about Even, and the way religion didn’t completely agree with his personal morals. So he took the best of Islam and dumped the rest. Sana calmly explained her standpoint and how she felt about her faith and it was beautiful to Yousef, although he felt like he didn’t need it for himself personally. She was so caught up in her talk that she started explaining how cockroaches had Antibiotics in their brains and how everything had a bigger reasoning. Yousef couldn’t’ help but admire her passion. They then took a stroll through the park and he picked some flowers for her which she attached to her Hijab. Sana was so beautiful and smart, he felt like he was on top of the world with her in that moment.

When the night had started to set, they finally reached her apartment building and stood in front of it facing each other. Sana was looking directly into his eyes. He couldn’t believe it, so he asked her just to make sure. She confirmed it and laughed so dearingly that his heart was about to drop. He couldn’t help but move his line of sight towards her full lips and imagine what they would feel like. As if she was reading his mind, she started shaking her head while suppressing a smile. He has never been rejected so sweetly. His feelings were bursting inside him and clouding his mind, so he couldn’t think straight anymore. He had totally forgotten what he wanted to say. Then Mama Bakkoush interrupted them, and the beautiful moment ended. On his way home Yousef was gliding on a cloud of ecstasy, not being able to repress his smile. Sana had stolen his heart today and he couldn’t be happier.

The next few days were filled with work, his boys and some basketball practice. He had hoped Sana would send him a FR again or just send any sign of interest. But there was none. Yousef knew she needed time to think about everything and he would give it to her. After their beautiful evening on the basketball court, he was high on hopes for them and would give her all the space she wanted. With every day that passed though, some doubts were creeping up naturally, maybe religion was too big of an issue for a relationship in Sana’s eyes after all, but they were all gone when Elias told him about the invitation.

Yousef looked at his phone and saw the time 18:07 o’clock. He got up to his feed and went get ready for the night. He showered, shaved, got dressed and put on one of his favourite snapbacks. He wanted to look extra good for Sana. Yousef was nervous but happy to see her again and especially spending a night of singing and laughter with her. What could possibly go wrong from here?

This is the first chapter. Tell me what you think. The next chapter is going to be SYNG, and I already know how I’m going to explain Yousef’s behaviour and we will have some dialogue finally (I love writing them a lot more than thoughts to be honest.). I hope it’s going to be relatable. Until probably tomorrow <3

PS: Please, excuse the imperfections in language, it’s almost 2 am in Germany. Also am I by no means a professional writer and English is my third language. Plus first Fanfic ever.

#skam #skam season 4 #skam season four #yousef acar #sana bakkoush #yousana #fanfiction #fanfic #fic #elias bakkoush #noora sætre #even #syng #karaoke #carrots #basketball

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